#idk im just delusional

[tsubomiiiii]

Small Silver redesign for funsies

[alexandralove]

Dont be nice to me unless you want to get married

[fatuismooches]

At the beginning of your relationship with Dottore, there had been numerous times when he had tried to leave you, or rather, attempt to force you to leave him in the Akademiya. Ignoring you, snapping at you... most notably literally kicking you out of the dorm (to waking up and nearly stepping on you, as you had decided to knock out right at the door.) Merely because he still had difficulty believing he was loved by you, despite having known you for years. It took much time but, eventually, your feelings finally clicked in that genius head of his.

However, uncharacteristically enough, there was one time you debated on whether you should leave Zandik. Only one time. And he had found out. If only you had been more careful.

It happened during the later stage of your illness when your ability to do many basic tasks had been stripped from you, leaving you reliant on Zandik for many things. You felt very guilty, for making him so do much work for both himself and you, but there wasn't much you could do about it, being the way you were now. Did you tell your lover about this? No, of course not.

But today, today would just be another regular day of what you had accepted to be your new life. However, you had noticed in the morning he seemed rather irritated, but you had no chance to ask him about it since he had to leave for class. You wondered what that was all about. (You, somewhere in the depths of your mind thought. You were continuously being a burden on the knowledge-driven scholar, no wonder he'd be irritated.)

When he returned to the dorm, you could tell that the foul mood still remained. Though, you could not understand what had caused it. He was perfectly fine last night, something must have happened after you fell asleep... As you watched him, the words "welcome home" could not seem to come out as they usually did, especially when he had not even acknowledged you yet, only emptying his bag with all of his books and other tools. You swallowed nervously, wondering how you were going to go about this when he spoke.

"Where?"

"Huh?"

"Where do you plan to go?" You were understandably confused by this seemingly random question.

"Um... nowhere?" A nervous smile made its way to your face, as Zandik only gave you a blank look, before carefully unfolding a piece of paper, and reading it over once more, no emotion on his face. Which, was already quite alarming for you, because Zandik was the kind of person who always had a hint of annoyance written on his face. He then turned the paper to face you and you squinted, reading the contents.

Oh. You instantly recognized what it was. It was a form that one had to fill out if they wanted to move out of the Akademiya's dorms.

When you said you felt guilty for everything, you meant it. Meant it to the point you worried if you were still good enough for him, if you had become annoying, a bumbling nuisance that had become more of a chore rather than a partner. It worried you, and you couldn't help but think about it. What if you were right? What if he did feel all of those things? Then maybe, maybe you should relieve him of this burden. You. Then, he could continue to pursue his goals, without the added hindrance of taking care of you.

It wasn't something you were set on yet, more like something you mulled over in your head. But you had filled out the potential moving out form tentatively just in case you decided to go through with it. Ah, you probably had shoved it in your bag along with your many missing assignments, and Zandik must have found it after trying to check your homework... But now, your lover was staring holes into you, expecting an answer.

"Well, I- I didn't mean it. It was... just in case," you were just spewing words at this point because you really had no defense. After all, how do you explain to your roommate of many years that you were going to move out and disappear without telling him?

"Just in case," the scholar repeats. "Just in case..." And then Zandik laughs. At what? You're not sure, because you've only seen him laugh at other people's foolishness, or in scorn and bitterness. It's a bit unsettling, seeing him act this way, but you have no time to think about it before the paper is torn right in half twice and then abandoned in the trash bin.

"No." Well... alright then.

"Za-"

"No, no no no. How utterly absurd. Ridiculous. You are not going anywhere." The way he says it simultaneously sounds like an order to you yet also an attempt to reassure himself of your impossible departure. You wondered if he interpreted your reason for leaving as something more... drastic.

"Hey-" You stand up, hoping an embrace would calm his nerves, but he begins to pace around. Now, this wouldn't be unusual, he tends to do this while he's ranting or deeply thinking about his research but obviously, it's different this time.

"Leave? No," Zandik scoffs to himself, "the possibility is nigh on impossible. There is no need to plan for such lengths, I shall make sure it doesn't come to that." When he finished mumbling to himself, you tried to interject before his gaze snapped back to you.

"And you. You, how dare you go behind my back and do such a thing? Do you think me incompetent? Do you think me a senseless fool that I would allow you to do this?"

"..."

"I find this quite tasteless, especially after how much you parroted about 'always being by my side' or 'never leaving'. Or have you finally shown your true colors? Leaving me after-" Zandik cut himself off because the words he was going to say next shouldn't be said out loud. Leaving him after he's already obsessed with you, when he's already in love with you and would go mad without your presence. But then all he could feel was your arms around him and your face buried in his chest.

"Zandik please, I'm sorry," your voice was but a whisper. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything like that." Zandik's hands itched to hold you back, but he restrained himself, needing to hear your reasoning.

"I don't want to leave you, I really don't. I love you! So... that's why I filled that form out. Because I... am scared of burdening you too much. I know how you are. I know you want someone who is useful, w-who can be of assistance in all kinds of ways, not someone who is dead weight. So I... I don't want you to force yourself to- ow!" Your increasingly pitiful dialogue was interrupted by a flick to your forehead and the clicking of a tongue.

"Fool..." he moved his hand to rest on the top of your head. "You can be quite intelligent, but the reasons for your stupidity can be headache-inducing sometimes. Now that you've said all of that, has it clicked how idiotic it sounds?" Though your partner's words sounded harsh, his tone was noticeably softer. You could only cast your gaze downward as he sighed.

"I too wonder why you do not take your own advice. Were you not the one who said to... 'talk things out', before jumping to conclusions? So why have I not heard of this?" (The phrase feels out of place and rather disgusting on the man who normally refuses to hold a conversation on anything other than research, but he forces it out for your sake. Unfortunately, he can also hear your sing-song voice in his head as he replays the words.)

"Because... it's dumb, like you said. I shouldn't waste your time anymore..."

"I usually do not entertain dumb inquiries but... you are an exception. My assistant's questions must always be clarified." And as his lover, your troubles must always be assuaged, but that part was left unsaid, although you knew what he meant. "Yes, your usefulness was a great help, but I couldn't care less about that right now. I care about you, and if taking on extra responsibilities happens to fall under that feeling, then so be it. I don't care," Zandik said bluntly. Was it elegant? No. Was it truthful? Yes. It made your cheeks warm a bit.

"Well... thank you for the honor," you couldn't help but crack a tiny smile as Zandik only mumbled something incoherent before pushing you back to bed. Ah, you were feeling a little drained from all of that.

"Now that all that is sorted out, and that hopefully every inch of that nonsense has left you, I suggest you go to sleep quickly, unless you want to be kept awake by the sounds of my latest experiment." You only giggled at your boyfriend. He's unkind... in a kind way if that made sense. But before you could be whisked away to the land of dreams, Zandik spoke once more.

"[Name]."

"Mhm?"

"...Do not try to leave me ever again."

"...I know, Zandik."

[xvx-monix-xvx]

WHY THE FUCK DID SOME RANDOM KORN ACCOUT FOLLOW ME LEAVE ME ALONE I AM A MINOR

[indigoshowers]

if robin and nancy dont kiss next season I may implode

[thegreatyin]

current fallen london fandom experience feels like im standing at the corner of a party holding a sippy cup going. i thought firmament has been pretty fun and intriguing so far

[k0t3x-n3t]

Atsushi’s a boob guy. Any and all sizes, so long as he's able to lay on and hold them (he also just admires them silently)

Akutagawa, however, is more of an ass/thigh guy. He says he doesn't care, but he has a very VERY high preference for the thighs and ass, even though he isn't much of a feeler for them (and yes, he also admires them silently)

[x-gon-give-it]

Headcanon, theory, prediction, whatever you want to call it,

but I think the reason that the universe Miquel hijacked collapsed, and not Miles, despite them both being “anomalies” is because Miquel was trying to change someone else’s story, as opposed to Miles who inspires other people to change their own stories.

Like, Miquel tried to force himself into a universe that wasn’t his. He took the place of his counterpart and pretended to be him, he was playing a part that wasn’t meant for him, he was changing a story that wasn’t his. And the universe rejected that.

Whereas Miles inspires people to change their own stories. His universe didn’t collapse because that’s HIS universe. It’s HIS story to tell, and sure the plot changed along the way, but he’s still telling it.

The same with 42-Miles. His story was drastically changed because he wasn’t bitten by that spider, but his universe isn’t collapsing because he’s the one still telling the story. He’s still shaping his own future.

And like how Miles inspired Peter B to have Mayday at all. Without Miles, Peter wouldn’t have gone back to his and he wouldn’t have had Mayday. But his universe isn’t collapsing because that’s a decision PETER made. No one forced him to make up with MJ and have Mayday. But Miles gave him faith and inspired him to go back and give life another try. (Don’t even get me started how Peter would have literally DIED if not for Miles. He was going to stay in Miles dimension. He was fully ready to deteriorate. He literally would have died if not for Miles saying “NO BITCH YOU GOTTA GO HOME” much less inspiring him to have Mayday, I’m just saying I’m just saying.)

And the thing is I don’t think Miquel realizes that. He’s so caught up in his grief and anger that he’s completely consumed with following canon and my never disrupting ANYTHING. He doesn’t realize that that universe collapsed because he tried to change someone ELSES story. He tried to become someone else to live their story. He didn’t try to make his own and that’s not how it works.

Idk just thinking thots tonight, And ATSV is always at the top of my brain

[kazumist]

the moment scaramouche realized he liked you wasn’t anything special.

he didn’t have such a shocking revelation like the ones he’d see in those romance comedy films that you encouraged him to watch with you, nor was he talking to anyone about it when he realized it either. the fact just simply dawned on him, right after a conversation with you that had zero connections to romance in the slightest. that’s when he knew.

the second you left his side when your conversation was over due to an errand you needed to run, it just came to him. a bit strange to think about since things like love never really sparked that much interest for scaramouche. but it was simply how it is.

however, if there’s one thing that scaramouche would never, and he means never, admit to you, it would be the fact that he’s been putting more effort in lately.

whether it's in how he fixes the collar of his uniform a bit more before walking to school or simply how he finally decides to put down that one annoying strand of hair on the back of his head that you always point out because it sticks out, hell, even if he’s been reciting more in class, he’d never admit that he’s been doing this ever since he realized he liked you. and he’d certainly never admit that he’s doing all of this because he wants you to notice it—there’s absolutely no way that you could know! 

(he would very much prefer to die rather than let you know all of this. it would be even worse if he had to admit he’s been doing such things. although this is merely an exaggeration from him, he just doesn’t really want you to know.

but he does have this small desire for you to notice it.)

and yet, even after all of these small efforts that he made just for you to notice him (despite knowing each other well enough to not do these things), scaramouche thinks all of his efforts were just a waste of time as he subtly steals small glances from you from time to time.

he doesn’t know how or when it happened, but since when did you get those earphones? they were a different color now than the last time he saw you wearing earphones. and your eraser is different from the one he used to borrow as well. did the old one perhaps already run out? hold on—why is he thinking of these things anyway? these questions are none of his business! and it’s not like he can use the answers to those in his homework.

slowly but surely, scaramouche thinks he’s going insane.

but for now, this is enough. you don’t need to know that what you do has the ability to drive him insane. you don’t need to know that he’s been putting way too much effort into making you notice him. you don’t need to know that he likes you, at least not yet. so for now, this is enough for him.

to admire you from the distance of your desks is enough.

the moment scaramouche realized he liked you wasn’t anything special.

but deep down, he knows that to him, you were something special.

[xxlady-lunaxx]

i feel like sanemi’s first crush is masachika, but he doesn’t realize it

it’s just that masachika is so sweet and kind and caring and he’s the first person sanemi can rely on. he can trust him and he just sort of ends up caring so much for this boy that little buds of love that go a touch further than friendship begin to grow

it’s probably short lived, or he just never notices it, but it’s still there

but it just goes to show how little sanemi’s had and masachika feels like his first breath of fresh air because there’s never been anyone he can be reliant on and he can’t help falling for masachika just a bit

(and masachika is the actual sun in his life so.)

[carlyleandco]

any qimir and osha girlies out there? just me? okay…

[hakucho-art]

This is, like, the third or fourth time (if not MORE) that I see a person apologize for talking about touken, showing enjoyment in the ship or needing to give some clarification. I know I'm not the only one who feels like the TG Tumblr space carries a negative atmosphere towards touken and it honestly kills my mood to post on here.

It also saddens me to see people show love for them so hesitantly. Like you're in the wrong for doing so. Like it's stupid. Like it's silly and unreasonable. Like it's almost shameful. Idk! That's how posting on here and see other people talk about them and acting ashamed about liking them makes me feel!

For how much TG tumblr advertises to be a welcoming space, I don't feel welcomed at all and more like just tolerated.

[eleu22]

GHOST MY BELOVED

i love him so bad so so so so so so so bad so bad

[xiaochiyo]

hyeyoon and wooseok are having too much fun with this whole shipping and fanservice thing somebody needs to stop them

[morallyunhelpful]

it kind of baffles me how little sympathy eurylochus gets :( everyone is so mean to him…

[volkolak]

girl help