#idk if there’s interest in viewing my website but if y’all want to see it lmk

[kagooleo]

been busy the past month but college completion is nearly upon me… by next week I’m gonna be a fish with a degree!!

[zpetlovesglitter]

The Wicked Powers Theories

The Wicked Powers has recently been getting me excited WAY too much - which says a lot about how weird I am since Cassie hasn’t even started on it yet (LOL).

aND, so, I kind of thought it’d be nice to jot down some predictions and theories on how the series might go and maybe some thoughts on THE SHIPS (that really do be the real TEA).

So.Here we go.And do let me know about any thoughts you have on this topic as well - I read anything about TWP like a crazed creature these days istg.

1)The POV has already been envisioned to be from Ty, Dru and Kit. I absolutely love this settlement since they are all very intriguing characters. Ty is an interesting person and his actions are always unpredictable, so we might enjoy this one. And,I believe he is at The Scholomance while the story progresses, followed by Livvy (Ghost Livvy, I mean).It’s still unclear what Livvy’s situation is, so I can’t wait to know more about that - it’s bound to be something unexpected. And, as for Dru, it’s kinda obvious. We all know that WE HAVE A LOVE TRIANGLE COMING UP. But, other than that, we also know she attends The Academy and finally starts to makes some friends and even has that really close Italian (..or was it Spanish???) Shadowhunter friend who’s her age and Cassie also revealed that the two are really tight indeed. And I will be honing in on the Love Triangle soon - I told you I’ll be trying to spill whatever tea I’m guessing at.  And, as for the last character WE HAVE KIT! OMFG YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE OLDER BROTHER KIT.LIKE GOSH DARN IT HE IS SO ADORABLE AND MINA IS SO EFFING CUTE I CAN’T EVEN-                          AND KIT’S TRAINING WITH JEM AND HE IS GOING TO BE A WELL-TRAINED SHADOWHUNTER IN TWP, SO YAYYYY!! And, I absolutely CANNOT wait for MinaXKit interactions, they are the cutest siblings ever and I absolutely know that Mina grows up to be sarcastic. I can’t wait for the possible sarcastic arguments between Kit and 4-year old Mina. YOU THINK I FORGOT ABOUT KITxTY? NOPE.THE REAL SHET’S COMING UP.

2)Now,we know that the storyline is going to have something to do with that Faerie Heirloom that was from the Rosales Family. And, Cassie also said it was going to be kind of an Arthurian Legend-ish story. If you don’t know the Arthurian Legend, I suggest you read on it. I’m not sure if Cassie meant the characters and LOVE Aspect of it or the LEGEND aspect of it as in the stuff about Excalibur and all. But, for now we’ll view it in both and examine it, shall we?

King Arthur's reign ends after his wife and best knight have an affair.

This is the drama in the legend.But, there are no relationships with the MCs yet. So idk. I’m clueless. Like, maybe Dru has a relationship?? Okay I’m clutching at practically nothingness so don’t judge me. :/

So,it’s obviously something to do with the LEGEND.

I am afraid I cannot say too much about it, since I have never read too deeply about it. But, here’s some of the basics:

-He managed to pull out Excalibur from the rock it was stuck in.

-He wielded Excalibur for the people and not for his own self-interest.

-He gets help from a wizard named Merlin.

-The peeps go on a quest.

And I have this reference from a website..I’ll hit u with the link as well, if you’d like to read more on it like I did

Arthurian legend, the body of stories and medieval romances, known as the matter of Britain, centring on the legendary king Arthur. Medieval writers, especially the French, variously treated stories of Arthur’s birth, the adventures of his knights, and the adulterous love between his knight Sir Lancelot and his queen, Guinevere. This last situation and the quest for the Holy Grail (the vessel used by Christ at the Last Supper and given to Joseph of Arimathea) brought about the dissolution of the knightly fellowship, the death of Arthur, and the destruction of his kingdom.

(I’ve linked it with the text above.)

So,now I thought this was interesting- the destruction part. After all, it’s something I’m expecting about the Shadowhunters. Will the Clave maybe be destroyed? Or maybe Faerie will be destroyed? So,there were three things that brought on this uh Destruction.FIRST, his wife and his best buddy were going behind his back and doing them lovey-dovey stuff. And they all go on some quest to retrieve something important to them. So, this sounds like something plausible to be the plot of TWP. Maybe the Heirloom’s missing? And who goes on the quest though? Maybe they venture through Faerie? BLAH MY HEAD HURTS SOME THINGS ARE BETTER TO BE SURPRISED WITH ;)

-----I kinda scrolled back up while writing about Janus down there and remembered CLARY MIGHT BE TAKEN HOSTAGE LIKE YESS AND THEY GO FIND HER MAYBE?

3)We will defo see Christina, Mark and Kieran at some point- no worries, Emma and Julian too. Happy Couples! XD

4)So,then we can look forward to Dru and Jaime’s interactions. I am absolutely excited for this the most, as a shipper of the two. If you remember, we saw Jaime ignoring her for a while back there at the end of QOAAD and then he says “See ya at the Academy soon ig”. I really do hope they meet and hang out as friends, at least. I am excited to see what kind of trope it’s gonna be tho. Like, do they ignore each other and remain awkward until they start the adventure stuff in the book where they eventually have to talk to each other after years or smth. Or, maybe they’re really good friends rn. But, what I’ll warn y’all shippers is that they might not end up together, and could wind up as brother-sister-ish kind of best buddies. Which is equally cute a relationship imo. It’s a really sweet thing to be, really. I lowkey hope Cassie spins something beautiful for their relationship like a sibling-like best friends kind of thing. But, I feel like they might have feelings for each other in secret. Or maybe they date. Or maybe they suppress their secret-feelings for the sake of friendship later on in the book and end up having that really sweet friendship I was talking about.There are SO many options and that is precisely why I am so freaking excited.

5)JAIME ROCIO ROSALES.       Like, I have this gut feeling that he might end up being my fave male protagonist character in TSC. He’s got it ALL. Like, the sense of humour, the looks, the bubbly yet brooding personality, the quirks and OFC THE FRICKING NAME ITSELF IS CUTE AF LIKE BRUH I CANNOT WAIT TO READ ABOUT HIM.I have so much to say about Jaime but I’d rather we let ourselves simply wait for the crumbs Cassie might give us or maybe reread all his parts in TDA like I do everyday or just wait for the book to come out rather than simp for someone we know nothing about yet....

6)Ash Morgenstern.         He’s a cute lil bean.        That was random and untrue lmao. He’s not a ‘lil bean’. He’s totally badass with dem wings and all, but we know he’s soft inside for Janus and ofc Dru, I believe. I find him the most intriguing character, honestly. I would love to know what goes through his head. He’s actually, like, the one character in TSC that I don’t have all figured out. He gon surprise us all for sure tho. He is awesome. That’s all I have to say for now. And he looks up to Janus which is SO GODDAMN SWEET AHHHH. And THE WINGS I CANNOT WAIT TO READ MORE ABOUT THE WINGS IT SOUNDED SO BADASS ISTG I LITERALLY CANNOT WAIT GOSH DARN IT. But he really do be a cute lil bean lowkey tho.

7)Kit and Ty LOL. I have no words really. But lemme tell you how it might go. There is definitely going to be some kind of reunion. AND THEN THAT’S WHERE IT GETS CUTE. They could either be awkward and we know what tension that gets us-perhaps some whisperings of My Watson...(?  ;) and maybe they go all sad and brooding with dem looks later OR, they could be the sweetie-pies they were before and be happy and all HIII BUDDDYYYY MISSED YAAA LESS GO BE DETECTIVES YAY BURN IT UP MAH BUDDY!! Either way it’s going to be cute af and we know it . TRUST IN CASSIE Y’ALL.I trust Cassie to let this ship sail the seven seas and seven more like it deserves.

8)Ash and Dru So, Ash has a strange lil fixation on Dru and I believe he even thought she was ‘pretty’ or something. It was definitely a good adjective, but I think he said ‘pretty’. idk but we know he likes her. and I can imagine a nice relationship. I can picture them with her hair flying in the wind and they meet for the first time or smth. IHNI WHAT IM SAYING. But, there will be DRAMA. They are going to be real cute with each other YOU CAN BET ON THAT.And, by cute I do not necessarily mean ‘Oh, you have the loveliest eyes’ or some shet like that. I have a feeling it’s going to be a case of ‘Well,that’s not weird or anything YOU WEIRDO - NO U - NO U - NO U’ However this relationship is going to go, I know that it’ll be a sweet one.And, for all you shippers of these two, I have no assurances that HE IS THE ONE or anything but he is definitely a candidate. Jaime is going to be some competition I can tell. So, idk. It depends on the Jaime x Dru ship to decide things for Ash x Dru ship imo, since it might be a no-brainer if the two have feelings for each other- I mean,Jaime is an actually perfect love interest in TSC, while Ash is strong potential Best-Friend material, so it’s ONLY if Jaime and Dru don’t like each other that way that Ash could make it as a love interest. So, if y’all wanna find out what’s in it for you guys, ask Cassie maybe about how the Jaime x Dru ship might go, the next time u wanna ask her ;)

9)Tavvy and maybe the kid Helen and Aline might have had We were getting hints of another baby, so HERE WE GO.Tavvy might have a playmate. :D. YAYYYYYYYYYY

10)Janus  I’m honestly worried about him. He is a worrisome character. I hate empathising with the antagonist, personally. AAAAHHHH . I hope we see some character development in him. I really don’t want to see him as an antagonist in the story. He’s sweet and feels cheated, but he should realise that it ain’t Jace’s fault but SEBASTIAN’S fault. I would like for him to make amends with Jace :( And, also, he might get the story started in TWP tho idk. But, seriously tho, when he went home in that short story and Ash asked, “I thought you were gone forever?” or something of that sort and he shook his head sadly and Ash went soft for him. Like, that fricking broke my heart. I love this relationship tho. And, i hope Clary and him can be good friends. But, I feel like he might end up dying to save her or smth and make us all cry . T_T

11)WHAT TF IS GOING ON WITH THE SHADOWHUNTER POLITICS RN THO?HOW AND WHERE ARE THEY ALL SURVIVING TOGETHER WHAT IS THEIR SYSTEM AND STUFF THIS IS NOT A POINT WITH POTENTIAL THEORIES COZ HONESTLY I WANT TO BE SURPRISED BUT I THINK THEY MIGHT ALL JUST BE IN HIDING AND THEN IN TWP THEY MIGHT HAVE TO COME OUT FOR A QUEST OR SMTH AND WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THE SHADOWHUNTERS AT THE CLIMAX OF THIS WHOLE SERIES??? IT IS THE END OF TSC SO IM SCARED AND KINDA SAD TOO :(((((((

12)Thule We might learn more about the Thule world and maybe they restore it or maybe the Quest is in Thule. idk. we don’t know much, but Thule will most probably be explored a lot. Cassie wouldn’t have opened up Thule for no reason.

13)Zara and Emma  Showdown? Befriend e/o ? What’s in store for these two? If it’s a showdown we get to see CORTANA YAY I AM OBSESSED WITH CORTANA NOW BECAUSE OF CORDELIA AND HER OBSESSION GOSH DARN IT WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO ME

14)BIG WAR I see a huge war coming I just know it. It’s a climax so there MUST be a big war and so I cannot wait! Feel like there’s gonna be some deaths as well. Lowkey feel like Jia might die. I can feel it. :(

15)The best-friend shadowhunter of Dru is a nice thing to look forward to! I can’t wait to read about the two! And I love the fact that Dru is finally exposed to new people. And, for anyone who’s confused as to how she goes to the Academy, in QOAAD she only said she’ll have some maturity done AFTER some years .  Those years are over and she at the Academy now hecc yeah I BELIEVE THE BFF IS CALLED THAI AND SHE’S FROM THE SPANISH INSTITUTE CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG???

16)Magnus Bane He is literally everywhere. He gon be here too. No worries for all the Magnus Bane stans. He’ll make it here without a doubt!  Good for you :).  and the entire community of shadowhunters they literally always need him  17)THE MAIN MAIN PLOT THE SHADOWHUNTERS SHOWDOWN IS OBVIOUSLY GOING TO ALSO BE RELATED TO THE PRINCES OF HELL COMING TOGETHER AND I AM TOO SCARED TO LOOK TOO INTO IT BUT WE KNOW SHIZ COMING GNJODIFPEDWEFHUGBJ VM

18)THIS IS KINDA RANDOM BUT I CAN’T WAIT FOR THE SELF-ESTEEM GROWTH IN DRU LIKE PLEASE SHE QUEEN MWAH

[captain-of-the-historicfuture]

~hello~ !! For the meta asks!: 3, 6, 9, 12, 15, 18, 21, 24, and 25 :))

Hello!! Thank you for sending these; I was really excited to see that ask game and I was hoping somebody would send some in. It still took me a while to actually answer them though, and for that I apologise. But without further ado! Some meta answers (under the cut because they ended up being fairly long, whoops):

3. What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be arsed to write all of the set-up and context it would need? (Consider this permission to write it and/or share it anyway.)

I thought of a few examples, but they could basically be grouped together under a common theme: whumpy/angsty scenes that were self-indulgent as all heck. The whole self-indulgent aspect often required the characters to be just the teeniest, tiniest bit OOC and/or necessitated rather unrealistic plot circumstances. So it was simply easier to keep such scenes as maladaptive daydreams, rather than trying to think of explanations for the character/plot issues…or exposing myself to judgement for them LOL.

Receiving permission to write/share one such scene anyway is an opportunity I can’t let slip by though. It might be because I’m writing this while running on zero (0) hours of sleep—let’s hear it for insomnia, y’all!—but I suddenly couldn’t remember any of my newer ideas under this category. However, I did recall a one-shot I had started writing a couple of months ago that sort of counts? “Sort of” because I could actually be arsed to write it since I was, ya know, writing it. Only got about six hundred words down though.

…should I share those six hundred words…?

………nahhh. I don’t think I’m quite ready for that yet.

But here’s the gist of it: Coulson and May (because of course it’s Philinda) were married for quite some time before the Attack on New York. But then Coulson DiedTM and then got ResurrectedTM. But gasp of horror, he had to lose his memories of his romantic relationship with May because reasons. (I actually did have some ideas for those reasons but sshhhh this is about me yeeting context and setup.)

The first half of S1 still happens as normal (except MayWard doesn’t happen because??? Vows) and it’s now post-E20 “Nothing Personal”. The morning after (or a morning soon after, whatever) the T.A.H.I.T.I. reveal! May’s mom—who doesn’t know about GH.325 and whom May fed a cover story about Coulson divorcing her or something equally as oof, IDK—shows up at the hotel and starts ripping into Coulson for breaking her daughter’s heart, then dragging her back into the field with her ex-husband (him), then accusing her of terrible things and forcing her away again.

Poor guy’s confused as heck, and so is the team, and soon enough so is Lian. The only one who understands what’s going on is May, and she’s freaking dying off to the side like why is this happening to me and eventually everybody’s like! Explain??? (Was thinking about including something from Coulson like, “Are you still keeping things from me?” Just for that extra smidge of angst, yay!)

So yeah then May gives a, like, two-sentence debriefing that elicits more questions than answers. Coulson decides to take May aside and they have a heart-to-heart. Lots of feelings and angst and hurt/comfort and at some point plenty of kissing too. Just! May hiding her feelings for Coulson’s sake but really magnified, plus some actual apologies and consideration of the grief May’s been through on Coulson’s part.

And uhh yeah that’s basically it I dunno hdsjncjshd. I warned y’all it’s OOC, plot-bendy, and very self-indulgent!

6. What character do you have the most fun writing?

I don’t think I could name a single character for this. I get different things out of taking on different voices, you know? I guess recently I’ve found myself gravitating towards more taciturn and introspective points of view, like JQ from my original novel Rosewood or M. Yisbon from my…other original novel Temple.

Generally, however, I like tackling stories from an outsider’s perspective. That’s why I so rarely write my more “substantial” (serious? demanding? for lack of better words?) projects from the PoV of my “preferred” character. This usually means writing from their love interest’s perspective, but not always. With shorter fanfic, using a more removed/unconventional/niche PoV can be really fun. Like, I once wrote a canon compliant ficlet purely(-ish) about Philinda from Tony Stark’s perspective. That isn’t always sustainable with stories that demand more character development or closer character studies, however, which is why it’s a good thing I like writing drabbles!

9. Are you more of a drabble or a longfic kind of writer? Pantser or plotter? Do you wish you were the other?

My word counts tend to run long, but I usually only write one-shots for fanfic. If I’m even inspired with a novella- or novel-length story idea for a fandom, you already know I’m in deep with them. And if I actually find the motivation to plan and execute that idea? Dangg. That’s only ever happened…twice, maybe thrice, and I’m in a lot of fandoms.

At times, I wish I could go for more of a middle ground ’cause, like, you know what I love to see? An AO3 dashboard with several completed novellas for my ship/character of choice. I mean yes, I hecking love >90k fics, but sometimes I’m in the mood for quick reads…and what am I supposed to do when I burn through all the drabbles and 2k one-shots? (Besides despair and/or reread my faves desperately.) Novellas are basically always safe for me LOL, and I’d hope to be able to give as much as I take.

Ultimately though, I think I’m okay with where I am with regards to that. I wish I could write more in general, but I’d be okay with “writing more” just meaning “writing more one-shots”, ya know? More than okay, really. I have mad respect for fic writers who have, like, a hundred or more one-shots under their belt for this one ship. The fandom ecosystem would be incomplete without them (as well as every other type of writer, but sshhh that’s the type of writer I’m closest to being right now).

I’m definitely a plotter, and I definitely prefer it that way. It’s cool having such a detailed record of my process. I like feeling like a frazzled genius on the brink of a major discovery with all of my different outlines and colour coding and many drafts and various websites.

12. Do you want your writing to be famous?

Not exactly. It might be cool if my original works were recognisable in the world, but I don’t think I’d want to be recognisable. As for fanfic, I’d low-key enjoy gaining a place in that fandom’s community as a fic writer. Like someone who gave and got fic gifts from fic writer friends, who participated in challenges and GCs, who received writing prompts on Tumblr, whose name was known for doing a certain trope/genre a bunch of times… Ya know what I mean?

Unlikely to happen when I’m so hecking hesitant to publicly (i.e., outside of AO3) claim credit for my writing, but fjnskfsjhfjs. A writer can dream, right?

15. Which is harder: titles or summaries (or tags)?

Of those three, tags are the easiest for me, for I have a reliable system for figuring out those.

Next easiest would probably be titles. For fanfiction, I like to use titles that are a quote from the source material. You should have seen all of my old Hamilton fanfic… I was really proud of some of those titles. And I don’t mean, like, whole lines—usually only two to five words. It’s a unique type of wordplay that I just love dabbling in.

And lastly, summaries. Sometimes inspiration strikes me and a snappy and intriguing synopsis just jumps out—one that I’m quietly pleased with—but most of the time I’ll spend way too long trying to think of such a synopsis and eventually just go with whatever I’d come up with so far. And live with my quiet dissatisfaction for the rest of time.

18. Do any of your stories have alternative versions? (Plotlines that you abandoned, AUs of your own work, different characterisations...?) Tell us about them!

Typically, no. If I have deleted scenes, I save and publish them separately, but that’s about it. I sometimes think of AUs for my own work and might talk about them in my author’s notes—might even talk about writing them—but I never really do anything with them.

Although…

It’s not uncommon for me to decide a plotline isn’t working for a certain story or to think of an interesting but undoable arc for a certain character, but what I’ll do is make a whole new story for those ideas. Once I’m done developing the original idea and the branched-off one, you probably wouldn’t be able to tell they grew from the same roots. Does that count?

21. What other medium do you think your story would work well as (film, webcomic, animated series, etc.)?

That depends on the story. I’ve actually written stories in other mediums—movie screenplay, musical stageplay, poetry, TV show scripts, play scripts, roleplay—but the novel does tend to be my comfort zone. Sometimes, if I have an idea that I think could work, or would even work better, as another medium, I’ll label it as such in my folder of ideas and decide not to write it as a novel.

Most of the time, my non-book projects are collaborations. I’m working with five different people on six different story ideas: two webcomics, one stage musical, one anime, and two animated TV shows. Little concrete progress has been made in any of those, mind you, but they’re still fun to discuss!

24. Would you say your writing has changed over time?

Absolutely. But I’ve been writing stories since I was five years old, so we would hope so, huh?

I wouldn’t say my writing’s changed completely, though maybe that’s just my insider’s perspective.

25. What part of writing is the most fun?

Oh gosh, I can’t believe you’d make me choose. Writing is just such a wonderful experience for me; I love just about everything to do with it. Admittedly, not all the time, but. Since that barely qualifies as an answer, however, I’ll give you this—

The endings. Not only that intense feeling of rightness when you wrap up that last sentence, but also the moments before. The adrenaline of knowing you’re almost there but you gotta push just a bit more to actually get there. And also the part right after—the real wrap-up, honestly: the revision and the editing. Heavens, I love revising and editing my work.

Which is not to say I don’t like writing it out for the first time, too—there’s nothing quite like seeing your cursor scroll to the next page, like going from a blank expanse to a Oh man, how many more lines are even going to fit on this page?, like watching that page counter tick up another number. However, there’s something cathartic about finally ironing out those problems I had to force myself to stop worrying about earlier because “just finish the first draft dangit”.

I guess that’s not really the end of the writing process, but whatever. Close enough (as fic writers are wont to say).

Another thank-you for these asks, and feel free to come back with more at any time! ;P

Send in fun meta asks for your friendly neighbourhood writer!

[sergeanttpoliteness]

idk if you’re taking requests or anything, if you aren’t ignore this, but if you are I would die for a classic, upside down spider-man kiss with the loml spider-noir. poor guy would probably be very surprised at first but suddenly its his favorite thing to do. thanks I love you and your work!!

AND➝ mayhaps…. a first kiss with noir? if u have time! 

sorry for answering so late nonnies! i feel so bad about that, i promise i wasn’t ignoring y’all. same goes to the few other requests i have in my inbox right now! 

——-

➹ inconvenient feelings➹ (spider-noir x reader)

word count: 2.5k

a/n: can you tell i had no idea what to call this lol. i didn’t edit either bc… oof. i’ve been struggling a lot with writer’s block (nothing new, honestly lmaoo) lately and someone close to me recently passed away and i haven’t quite… been able to wrap my head around it?? i don’t know, not to be a little bitch but this week consisted of a lot of school stuff, emotions, and anxiety so thanks @ the people who requested this bc i needed to write some wholesome stuff. also thx at my bestie for helping me out w ideas, ily broz. anyway, there’s some minimum ripeter x reader although it’s solely platonic! hope you all have a lovely week (:

taglist: @marvelousmorales

It’s not convenient. Convenient was that one person with the pretty smile whose eyes seemed to possess an affinity to him that one time at a jazz club, or the singer with the honey voice and smooth runs more soothing than the late night singing of a mother to her child. A poor goon who smooched his fist whilst it collided with his face could even fit the designation, really— but what mattered, the simple component they shared, was that all three were just a speck in a sea with no end; an eternal blue void with only more possibilities hiding in the pitch-black depths neither he nor the light’s fingertips could touch. They were safe. Uncomplicated.

Peter stared out the window, at a completely distinct world, far from a city in a vintage film: the ongoing the mechanical song of speeding cars, the newer and taller lit up buildings, the blinking golden lights, identical to a field of a thousand miniscule suns. This was not convenient. It’s… so different— like day and night, water and fire. This meant to swim out of the ocean he belonged to and reach for a foreign land, to run after a mere drop of water when a whole fucking body existed behind him. It’s not safe. It’s complicated.

Your sleepy eyes roamed the same page for the fifth time with no precise purpose, more disoriented than a newcomer in a large city until they traveled and spotted their true destination: Peter’s own sight deeply engulfed in the view outside, the twisting of his brows every now and then filling your mind with wonder and curiosity at what could possibly be running through that brain of his. You could’ve continued with the ogling like the damn creep you were (seriously, you gotta stop it with that, you told yourself), but you slipped and made a mistake— the most laughably absurd misstep— worse than trying to take a picture of a stranger and then, to your utmost terror, the flash going off— which wouldn’t have occurred in the first place if you’d paid your electricity bills on time. Your apartment wouldn’t have been plunged into darkness, and you wouldn’t have, without thinking, your head clearly not in its right place at the moment, slightly tilted your phone and directed your phone’s flashlight right at the side of his face. You quickly pulled the beam of light away, as if that would work; however, his gaze drifted to you. “Sorry.” You blurted out, acting casual and pretending to focus on the journal on your lap. “You were so quiet, I thought you had fallen asleep.” You lied.

“No, I’m awake.” He said, furrowing his brows to himself— of course you already knew that. You mumbled a small ‘good’, holding the notebook close to your face, like a child staring through the window of a pet shop at some puppies, shining the ‘smartphone’, he’d learned, over the pages. You bit your lip, your shoulders shaking with your surfacing laughter.

“Oh, man, this one’s so dumb.” You snickered before running your finger up the paper, clearing your throat. “October 8th, 1999. Today I came back from my camping trip with Peter, Ben, and May. We ate a lot of s'mores— Uncle Ben makes the best! We also told some scary ghost stories, and I even made Pete scream. It was awesome. You will not believe what happened!” You read the last sentence with a dramatic tone, similar to that of a terrible news headline from a sketchy website, making yourself more comfortable on the L shaped bench seat and leaning into Peter’s side.

Peter tensed at first, but slowly, he pushed himself to relax after you rested your head on his shoulder, a quiet voice in the back of his head speaking against his desires, echoing the terrifying thought that he could get used to this. “I don’t know, enlighten me: what happened?” He asked, amused. You lifted your finger, eyebrows raising gradually, building up the suspense. He waited, and waited, and waited, until, finally—

“I have to go eat dinner. I’ll tell you later.” You finished with an unhumorous voice and a poker face. Yet again, he awaited in silence, interested. Man, you took this suspense thing quite seriously— wait.

“And?”

“That’s it.”

“That’s it?!” He looked down at you and you nodded. “Oh, c'mon! You just gonna leave the reader hanging like that?”

You shrugged, wearing a shit-eating grin, loving his genuine disappointment as you flicked the page. “Sometimes that’s just the way it is.”

“Oh, what malarkey!” He laughed softly. You crinkled your nose— malarkey. What a dork.

You resumed scanning the barely discernible handwriting, the corner of your mouth tugging upwards. “Alright, this one does have an ending.” You sat up, rolling your shoulders back only to go back to your position of hunching over the journal. “April 3rd, 2000. I’m sorry I’ve been gone for so long, I forgot I had this journal. Something crazy happened.”

“The end.”

“Shut up.” You shushed him, shaking your head. “'I hung out with Peter today. We rode our bikes, had a race down the hill near my house, and I also got a butterfly to land on my finger. Man, I love insects!’ …and I still do.” You smiled and he glanced down at you, his mouth twitching. A peculiar glow in his chest grew, fueled him after he recognized that you felt comfortable enough to share this part of you with him; an insight on the stories that carved you into the person that you were today, the being that made every classy, pearly white grin and musical prodigy so boring, so undesirable.

You shuffled on your bum to turn and face Peter, continuing, “We came back home to play some more. We were sitting in front of the TV when, suddenly, he said my name, and like a normal person would, I looked at him…” You inclined forward, voice quieting, looking up at him.

“You won’t believe what happened.”

His eyes darted heavenward and he groaned. “Oh, lord.”

“He kissed me!” You cried out, with as much emotion that past you spilled onto the paper with the five exclamation marks and the three times you underlined the sentence. You slammed the notebook shut and let out a strangled clamor. “I still remember it very clearly. It was just a peck, but he fucking… smashed his mouth into mine, it hurt so much and my lip started bleeding and everything.” You giggled, abashed, rubbing your eyes.

Peter’s brows rose with surprise, pondering how an alternate seven-year-old version of him from another universe had more balls than him. He had to admit, though, the scene playing in his head was more entertaining than unfortunate. “And what’d you do?” He questioned, his mouth twitching.

“He was just curious and wanted to see what kissing someone was like, so we promised we wouldn’t talk about it ever again. He was so embarrassed, though, and felt so bad for making me bleed that he almost started crying.” You recalled, chuckling as you eyed the cursed diary one last time and placed it beside you. “What an idiot. I miss him.” You sighed, peering up at him, grinning. “What was your first kiss like, huh?”

It was comical, almost, the raging blush that trickled his face, the greyish tint screaming for the world’s attention. It was just a Peter Parker thing, you guessed: blushing like there was no tomorrow. “Uh, my first kiss?” You nodded. “Well… it happened when I was eighteen.”

You put the side of your head against the wall, eyes going round, your inquisitiveness close to that of a kid listening to a grandparent’s story. “Was it romantic?” You wanted to know everything: who the person was, the place, the context. Did he enjoy it? Did he make the move? And if so, then was there a chance that, maybe…

Unlike you, he did not have much interest in the subject; he stuttered, searching for a way to move on from the memory before he imploded. “I don’t, I don’t think anyone’s first kiss is romantic.”

You squinted at him, noticing his obvious attempt at dodging the question, but chose to spare him. Just for a few milliseconds, though. “Have you ever had… a perfect kiss?” You said, unsure of how to word such a silly question. He shook his head and you hummed, silently taking in a quick breath, your gaze moving to your right. “Have you thought about what you want it to be like?”

Should he say it? He wanted to. He really did. But he couldn’t, even if his eyes almost flickered down to your lips. “Who thinks about that?” He muttered. Perhaps he had. Perhaps he’d been guilty of having the thought slither into his mind once or twice— possibly more than just that. Perhaps it’d pestered his mind as of recent, like that damn small scratch on his glasses that won’t go away no matter how many times he tried to wipe it away as if that would even help. Perhaps it returned as you unconsciously licked your lips and raised your shoulder, a bashful grin growing on your face.

“I have, when I’m bored. An upside down kiss with a cute guy.” You admitted, your eyes narrowing afterward, only just now realizing how bizarre the idea was once you said it aloud. Your impatience throbbed in your head so badly you didn’t mind the embarrassment as much, though. You really were doing this, huh? “I think I found the cute guy.” You hinted, your heartbeat pounding in your throat.

He understood the insinuation, of course he did. But what better way to run from your feelings than close his trembling hand into a fist, pretend to be clueless, and act like an idiot?

“Who’s the lucky fella?”

Didn’t think he was so stupid, you grumbled in your head, masking your faint irritation. You pressed your lips together, sight on your cushions. “Someone I like quite a lot.” You vaguely said, voice distant. “Though I don’t think you’d understand— you’re not one to fall in love, no?”

It was half a joke but half a real question, one with solely one right answer you yearned to hear from him if you got lucky enough. Peter blinked nervously, fear burning in his stomach, clenching his insides as his tongue dared to break free from his control, from his cowardly spell. “Lately I’ve had someone in mind.” He breathed out, close to breaking out in a sweat. He watched how your eyes dimly lit up, hesitance impeding the light from fully glowing.

“Really? And who is this ‘someone’?”

“It’s a secret.”

“Tell me.”

“Not now.” He gulped. You pouted, begging with your eyes. “N-no.”

“Are you ever gonna make a move?”

Peter drew his lower lip between his teeth, feeling dizzy just by thinking about it; the downfall of the relationship once the distance became too much, once the malaise with no cure finally rotted the adoration, infested the heart, decayed it. “No.” Same answer. Same bedeviled word that boomed in his head whenever his emotions were close to getting the best of him.

“Why haven’t you done it yet?” You whispered, not caring anymore about how obvious you were

being. He frowned. Why hadn’t he done it yet?

“I don’t know if I should.”

“Why not?”

Why not? His own thoughts repeated, betraying him. The confusion unlatched the cage, released all the questions and doubts about his reasons and dread. They crowded his brain, rang in his ears. “It’s… it’d be too hard to keep the relationship alive.” He retold more to himself and the storm of interrogations than you.

Your brows snapped together, your own fear knocking on the door again. “Is it not worth it to try, though?” It’s what you’d told yourself: the antidote to unfreeze your limbs and wave goodbye at the concern hanging in there, because… was it not?

In the overwhelming haziness, he finally looked at you. It’s what he needed to come upon a realization, a truth he knew all along but crumbled and threw away. Everything hushed, one single, final phrase in the quiet of it all.

Convenient wasn’t what he wanted.

“It is.” He said under his breath.

You heard him, and your eyes twinkled. “Well, then make the move.”

He couldn’t help it anymore. His eyes found your lips.

“I will.”

You stared at each other for a moment, anticipation never more warming than right then as it fluttered in your chest. To your biggest disappointment, he broke eye contact and stood up. “Close your eyes for a moment.” He ordered, his face indistinguishable in the dark now that he was further away.

“Creepy, but okay.” You huffed, your eyelids fluttering shut. “You better not be running away right now, you’d break my poor ol’ heart.”

“Don’t worry, that’s not the case.” You heard him say. You trusted him, which could’ve been a terrible choice. The total silence that followed didn’t put you to ease at all, honestly. Maybe you annoyed him so much with your questions that he was about to murder you, and if that’s what was happening, you were quite sad, to say the least.

Your eyelids were itching to open and you lifted a brow, straining your ears to distinguish any sign of his presence. “What the hell are you doing?”

“You’re not gonna believe what’s about to happen.”

You snorted at his reference, but his voice was… oddly close. You opened your eyes, and— “Oh, fuck!” You yelped and jumped back in your seat. Damn right you weren’t gonna believe what was about to happen, for Peter dangled from the ceiling right in front of you, upside down.

“Is it too much of a strange idea? I was going to simply stick to the ceiling upside down, but then I thought… that’d be… worse.” He clumsily explained. You looked up at the web he hung from, laughing in disbelief.

“What the hell are you doing?” You repeated, but you weren’t mad— your large smile backed that up. You couldn’t figure out if it was a blush creeping up his face or if it was from the fact that he was upside down. Both, maybe.

“I’m making a move.”

You giggled, glad you confessed what you considered to be a perfect type of kiss to him or else you wouldn’t had witnessed how absolutely ridiculous he looked right now. “So you’re willing to help me check 'kissing someone upside down’ off my bucket list?” You smirked.

He grinned. “It would be my pleasure.”

You bit your lip, placing both hands on his head. “Alright, then.“ 

You leaned forward, the tip of your nose brushing against his chin. You softly kissed the area below his bottom lip to tease him, but he didn’t want to wait any longer. Not after so long. Quickly, he enclosed your own bottom lip with his mouth, lastly fully aware that inconvenient truly was magnificent.

[janiedean]

Bro the Queen thing was just for a laugh lol let gay people make jokes

bro, if you had said ‘let gay people make jokes that make them sound like four year olds that just found out kindergarten exists’ I could have taken you seriously, but since you still can’t get into your thick performative activist heads that it’s not funny for anyone except maybe the three of you, I’ll explain you a few brief facts:

one: ¾ths of queen are straight so assuming they wouldn’t understand song they wrote and played (beyond somebody to love) already shows that you haven’t thought this joke through;

two: freddie mercury made a goddamned point to not make his sexuality a selling point or the only part of him people would be interested in when listening to his *music*, so your dumb jokes are something he would most likely fucking hate;

three: sorry to break it to you, but with all the sales queen had, going statistically, I can assure you more than half of their fanbase is straight, so congrats on assuming millions of people don’t get the bands they like;

four: music is an extremely subjective thing that tells different things to different people regardless of the original target of the song. I’ve seen articles titled ‘how I, a lesbian person, realized springsteen’s music wasn’t just for male cishet middle-aged guys’ in which people said that to them, a song that’s blatantly about a guy who killed someone and hightails it out of town and hopes that the border patrol doesn’t stop him, felt like it was about wanting to leave somewhere you had to stay in the closet and felt suffocated because you couldn’t come out. now, that’s nowhere near the original meaning of the song, but if for the lesbian author that related on that level… who the hell am I to make posts like ‘lesbians don’t understand springsteen songs’? spoilers: no one;

five: one reasons queen actually made it big was that their songs are actually very much relatable on a bunch of different levels and as I explained some ass who made jokes about how *straights* wouldn’t get I want to break free (written by a straight man btw but I see that now at least y’all are having the decency to pick songs that freddie wrote to throw shade at the straights TM, huh?), just that ONE song can be relatable for, FOR EXAMPLE, people with depression, people stuck in a phase of their life they hate, someone getting over a bad relationship and lgbt people who want to come out. and the lyrics to I want to break free are hardly extra complicated or difficult or obscure. of course then you have borap which no one still understands and freddie refused to explain but like… it’s IT CAN BE WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT regardless of whether their lyrics are obscure or the entire contrary. that was what made queen sell the number of records they did - because they make songs people can relate to, genius;

six: the fact that your ***joke*** assumes straight people can’t in any way shape or form conceive a life where they feel like they’ll be forever alone and no one will love them or they will never find a relationship says all about how **funny** it is because it implies dehumanizing an entire category of people and assuming they don’t have feelings or can’t conceive what y’all go through, which then turns into People On This Hellsite sending straight people TM the worst kind of bullshit and vile anons just because since we have no feelings and we’re supposed to take all your dumb unfunny jokes then it’s fine. idk, since I’ve been here according to you I should have laughed at:a) people telling me at thirty I was too old for anything and I should look for a husband and get married already;b) people telling me I was a homophobe/half of this dumbass website blocking me on sight for informing y’all that straight women find men sexually attractive as a general rule - no, really;c) someone telling me once that they hoped I’d find someone I would trust implicitly and give all of myself to in bed just to have them tell me the moment after we’re done that I was ugly and unlovable and I deserved to die alone;e) being called a bitch/homophobe an insane amount of times for pointing out that straight women who don’t look standard attractive have issues;f) people questioning why I went to therapy because I happen to relate to a character in a straight ship that they hated and the reasons why I went are Issues That Character Has.that was just the first six instances I could think of because they were personal but I assure you, your rhetoric about straight people TM being dehumanized aliens who hate y’all isn’t helping literally anyone;

seven: as someone who has fucking struggled with years with the issues the somebody to love narrator has (I did look at the mirror and felt horrible/almost cried when I was a teenager, I did wake up each morning feeling like shit for half of my time in uni, I’ve been struggling with managing initiating contact with other people since high school fucked me up in that sense, I’ve been told that I could never be attractive enough to find someone who’d love me and that I was too brainy or ugly or extra or threatening for men to even look at me and so on) and who has always found that song immediately relatable which is why, surprise surprise, out of all the songs freddie mercury wrote on his own for this band - not counting the march of the black queen but that’s another story - somebody to love is absolutely my single favorite and has always been since the second I heard it, because to me it was relatable at seventeen and it’s relatable now, the moment I read that fucking ****joke**** I literally felt a bout of vomit rise up in my throat, my stomach closed up and for a second I felt like crying as your joke was implying that my straightness disqualified me from understanding/liking a song I’ve loved and felt deeply for half of my life, but I suppose that doesn’t mean anything in comparison to the fact that you **gays of tumblr** need to have a laugh at the expense of 85% of the planet and not, idk, homophobes? no, you never say HOMOPHOBES COULDN’T UNDERSTAND QUEEN or whatever the fuck it is, you say straight people can’t. if you don’t see where the fuck is your problem I’d advise you to really go back to kindergarten because usually you realize that other people have feelings at about that age and I have a feeling that if this is your reasoning for saying I should shut up and have a laugh at my own expanse, well, you’re just an asshole;

eight: newsflash, bro, some people use music to cope with just about anything. I’m not the only person I know who has a fairly damned visceral personal relationship with the music she listens to, to the point where I can do the art is not the artist thing np with just about any media except music - I can watch a movie made by a person I despise or whose political views I despise, if I think it’s a good movie, I can’t physically listen to music from people I despise or whose political views I despise. heck, every time my local rock music station airs current lynyrd skynyrd’s music I mute it because their lyrics make me want to hurl and I actually do like the melody half of the time, but I can’t��listen to them. and I know people who are way worse than me about this. if you show up basically telling me (or whoever else) that bands we like and helped us through whatever fucking shit life threw at us are now Not A Thing We Can Like Or Understand Anymore you’re being an asshole and for a thing that makes no sense because the beautiful thing about MUSIC in general is that everyone finds the music they like relatable for different fucking reasons even if it’s the same artist and your dumbass attempts at **gatekeeping** bands that existed since before you were born and straight people listened to since before you were born and whose records they bought before you were born is honestly just so fucking ridiculous and really kindergarten-level that if that is what you need to have a laugh I advise you to develop some sense of humor, because you sure as hell ain’t got one.

good enough for you? your joke wasn’t funny. deal with it e stacce.

also: I’m fucking done giving a shit about what kind of dumbass jokes at the expense of **straight people** y’all think is cool to make on here. are we oppressed for being straight? sure af not. but since most straight people on here are actually allies and support your rights and uh, are also human beings that aren’t just useful when you need someone to reblog your info posts informing us that ***straight people can reblog!!! :)))*** underneath after having reblogged your fucking jokes ten minutes earlier, I really don’t give a fuck about your need to have a laugh at the expanse of other people’s feelings and I’m going to reblog all the people telling you that y’all ain’t funny until my fingers fall off.

ps: did you send this message also to the pansexual user who called that dumbass OP on their bullshit before I did? just for science.

pps: grow the fuck up, it’s been time since years and y’all have about played all of your ‘it was just a joke’ cards a hell of a long time ago.

[benhaardy]

constellation || b.m.

(what a man ^)

REQUEST: Hello! Could u do a college!bri with reader in which she’s like majoring in something completely different than Bri but they have a mutual friend (could be Roger) and Bri is so infatuated with her because her major is more like arts and stuff and idk lots of fluff?

A/N: eeeeee i loved writing this smmmmm i really hope yall like it even though it’s prettttttyyy specific tbh lol but if you don’t like arts or whatever bri is still a cute lil loverboy in this just imagine him but with your own work? writing or music wise or anything else really. i hope you enjoy cause i lovvvveed writing this. absolutely loved it. i use that phrase too much. anyway, i just really really liked this one it took me like two whole days to do it lol sorry that took awhile and to people w other requests i got u im still workingg on yalls.

requests are clooooseeed at the moment and i am currently working on the ones i have. you can still send them in but they will not be done/started until i am finished with this batch.

the “rings” / “halos” mentioned aren’t like an angel halo w the circle floating above. its like the paintings that depict the virgin mary? i’ll link a pic right here.

as always, tried to make this as neutral as possible for the reader, but it is fem!reader. there might be something pertaining to height…? but i doubt its anything substantial lol shoutout to y’all tall peeps.

this can be read as normal queen or borhap!queen.

happy new years folks! hope y’all enjoyed yours as i have enjoyed mine. hope you enjoy this fic like i did too lol :p thanks for sending this request in!

Wordcount: 2.4k

Warnings: one fuck word. fem!reader. p fluffy. was beta’d halfway, but proofread. APOLOGIES i don’t know much about space or the sky or stars… all info i got about constellations were from this website (lifesaver lol i really hope its accurate). i’m writing this at 4 am, all worth it lol i looooved this story. anywhere here’s constellation *pulls out guitar*

You stepped back to observe the basic outline that you drew on the canvas. It was a shell of what you wanted to actually paint, currently, but in a few hours, it would be quite the opposite. You moved the easel and canvas around so it wouldn’t be against the light of the large panels of glass surrounding you in what was supposed to be a breakfast nook which you had converted into your art “room”.

You were ready.

You took a deep breath and went to grab an old shirt that you could put on before painting. Going through the kitchen, then the foyer, then the stairs, you went straight to Roger’s room, a place where you could find a crappy ripped, and possibly faintly sweat-scented top to throw on. Your favourite flatmate wouldn’t mind, now would he?

You rummaged through his drawers, careful not to make a mess of his nice shirts or the ones he wore to gigs. Finally, you found an old Hendrix t-shirt that was already splattered with paint. Perfect. You took off your shirt, threw on the new one and put the old top in the laundry.

As you went down the stairs, you heard a noise that sounded like it came from the kitchen. It was probably one of the dogs messing around with your canvases. Quickly, you jogged towards your art room, where a familiar blonde boy was crouching down, viewing the propped up half-finished painting that was drying. There was a tall, curly-maned man shuffling through your masonites.

“Uhh…hello?” You said, confused. Who was this? Obviously, there was Roger, but he hadn’t brought anybody home except for the occasional girl. Rog stood up from his place and the other man had turned around to look at you, sheepish.

Your best friend came around the easel to hug you around your neck, a cigarette in his fingers and your arms around his waist. “Hello, love,” he said. He let go and moved to face the new guy watching both of you. “Y/N, Brian. Brian, Y/N. Brian, this is my closest friend and she loves painting. Y/N, I’m in his band now! Smile!”

You exclaimed, “Oh my god, Rog! That’s amazing!” You were glad his endless practice and jam sessions were working out. Roger was back to looking at your other paintings. Now, you faced Brian. “Hey, Brian. What do you play?” you noticed his hand still on the hardboards. “What were you looking for?” you questioned.

“Oh, sorry.” Brian took his hand off the boards. “I play the guitar.” You made a mental note of that. “I just noticed this one up on the front here… Is this Rog?” He pointed to the first board, which was a painting of Roger from the shoulders up. He had a halo of fire surrounding his head in a circle and he was looking up above. The background was of the night sky, the constellations Leo, Phoenix, Lynx, Hercules, Draco, Vulpecula, and Auriga around him, multitudes of small stars smattered in the blank spaces.

“Yeah, it is. It’s part of a new series I’m doing. It’s my friends and constellations that relate to them. I saw the stars in a book and I thought it looked great so, yeah. It’s fine if you want to take a look.”

Roger was shuffling through who-knows-what when he added, ”Bri majors in physics and all that—the stars.”

“That’s so cool! I’ve always been interested in space and such but my passion has always been in the arts. I major in fine arts.”

Bri smiled and nodded, still examining the painting of Rog and tracing the constellations. “This is gorgeous,” he whispered to himself as you were distracted by Rog giving his input on one of your other paintings.

--

You positioned yourself in front of your easel once more, the boys off to the living room to practice with each other. You primed your canvas, mixed your colours, and set out your brushes. A picture of your subject was taped up on the canvas holder of your easel and the book of constellations was set up on the table next to you. Roger and Brian’s session was great background music for your painting time. You found yourself tapping your foot to the beat.

A few hours later, your painting was done. It was modelled after one of your classmates in your European History class. You stood back and put your hands on your hips. You painted her from the side, sitting on her calves. She wasn’t wearing anything, her chest only covered by a wave of water that led up to another halo surrounding her head. She was looking down at her hands, clasped in her lap with the constellations and stars above her. Her curly, caramel brown hair was splayed out behind her and upon her shoulders, droplets of water among them. You were quite pleased with your first (somewhat) nude where you captured the curves of her body true to what she looked like.

You heard Roger and Brian finish up their set and go into the kitchen. The fridge door and cupboard opened and closed. They walked into your space, Roger with a towel around his neck and Brian a little more disheveled than before. Brian’s top buttons were undone, exposing two necklaces. “Hm,” you thought as you watched him drink from his glass of water standing in the doorway, “Hmmmmmmmmmm.”

Your best friend went around and looked at your artwork. “Damn, who is that?” Roger asked, clearly interested in who your painting was of. He took a sip of water.

You took the picture off the easel and replied, ”None of your concern, Rog.” You shook your head, snickering along with Brian.

Brian walked to your other side and viewed your painting himself. You looked for his opinion on his face. “Wow, Y/N,” he mumbled, “Aquarius, Cassiopeia, and Eridanus are they?

“Correct.”

“This is beautiful, absolutely beautiful. The way she looks, so sensual yet innocent. Wow, Y/N. This is great,” he said quietly.

“Thank you, Brian. That means everything.” Brian smiled at you, bashful.

A new friend (and basically, new flatmate) was made that day.

--

A few months had passed. Smile had been doing great. Roger, Brian, and you were close as ever. Often, you went to their practices and sketched your surroundings, often Roger drumming or Tim singing. You loved seeing Brian’s vibrant smiles but him still paying careful attention to his playing. You would sit at the bar and sketch, or do homework, or just drink. Roger’s cheeky grin and Brian’s reserved but bright twinkle were always there for you up on that stage.

You were at the park with Bri at his invitation while Rog was off with his girl and Tim was somewhere doing something else. He met you with a blanket, his physics textbook, and a few writing utensils and you met him armed with a sketchbook and a bunch of pencils. It was a sunny, British summer day. You greeted each other and found a tree to sit under. Brian spread out the blanket for both of you and you sat down.

Much of your days with him weren’t always so silent. You had helped each other study often. He was often at your side when he was done practicing with Rog, the adrenaline that coursed through him making him seem like a child, a contrast to the calmness of your art process. After shows, he would be so talkative, willing to speak for a long time about anything and everything. You two would frequently be the only two left at the bar after a gig, Roger giving you his customary sly smile behind Bri’s shoulder as you conversed into the late hours.

He loved hearing of your endeavours in art and your classes and never failed to ask to see the new drawings of the new. Usually, you were shy to show other people what you had made but you just had this openness around him. You knew if he had any judgments he would say them in a constructive manner but he never seemed to put too much attention on your mistakes, rather being a “fix it and move on” type of person.

You liked him a lot, really. It didn’t help at all that he was intelligent and attractive and helpful and just a great guy all aro— never mind. Check off all of the boxes for “things you want in a man”. You tried not to pay attention to it too much.

Both of you were off to your own devices, buried in your work. A slight breeze came about, feeling wonderful against your skin. You looked back at Bri sitting against the tree, the wind shifting his hair and his book in his lap. You went back to your own thing.

“Y/N?” Brian spoke up after a while.

“Yeah?” You replied back, still focused on your drawing.

“Could I watch you draw? If that’s alright with you. You pick out the perfect colours and compositions and everything. It’s fascinating. Everything just comes together exemplary.” He spread his hands out at “exemplary.”

“Of course, Bri,” you said, flattered. “Of course.”

Bri moved closer to you, pretty much right behind your shoulder. You flipped to a new page in your book and set to work. He watched your pencil as it flew across the paper, depicting a sleeping dog with a couple that was sitting the next tree over. You could feel his eyes settle upon your face momentarily, heat rising up to your cheeks.

“You know, Y/N. You make a pretty funny face when you’re drawing,” he laughed. Brian played with a piece of grass absentmindedly but still paid attention to your drawings and now your eyes.

“Oh yeah, Bri? What’s that face you’re speaking of?” You took a look at him. He pursed his lips and pushed them out to the left; he drew his eyebrows together and pretended to draw in thin air. You giggled together at his silly (albeit, quite realistic) impression of you.

“To be fair, you have one too, when you’re playing,” you teased.

“How so?” Bri acted like he was offended.

“Well, I can’t really do it and nor is it as severe as mine… but when you play, it’s as if nothing else in the world matters to you but in a good way. It’s like, ‘Who cares about uni? Who cares about anything else?’ You kind of just look like it’s you and your guitar against the world, right? It’s quite nice, watching you play,” you said, voice getting quieter as you continued.

“It is true. Us against the world.”

--

Two weeks had passed. Rog went out with his girlfriend after a session with Bri so you were left alone with the guitarist. He was in the living room making up his own compositions and writing songs like he normally does while you stayed in your little studio. A little lamp was clamped to the table next to your easel so you could have a soft light on your canvas. You painted until Brian came in, standing at the threshold.

“Hello, love,” you said gently. You set down your brush and stretched.

“Hi, babe,” he replied back, advancing forward.

You remembered what you were going to show him and in a split second, you practically screamed, “No, Bri, wait!” He put his hands up and froze in his spot. “Just stay there, okay? Close your eyes.” The guitarist lowered his hands and obeyed.

You quickly moved to take the painting on your easel and prop it against the wall alongside the other drying ones. You looked through the finished paintings and came across the one you were looking for. After grabbing it, you set it up once more. The finished product after hours of work was finally on display. You came back around Brian and guided his towering self to your normal space in front of your painting spot. “Open your eyes.” He did.

You both looked at the piece of artwork in front of you. There was a large smile on his painting self��s face and his eyes were closed. His head was tilted back, up at the stars surrounding him. Bri’s curls were framing his face, small stars speckled throughout them. A ring of water was around his head. “Cancer, Circinus, Leo Minor, Lyra. Pyxis, Telescopium, Camelopardalis,” he said, so quiet you could barely hear it. You watched as he admired the painting of himself, one that you put so much work into to make special.

You nodded. “It’s you, Bri. That’s what I was drawing in the park. I was just doodling but I looked at you and you just looked so—pretty?” You both laughed at your words, but you continued on. “That’s the word. Pretty. With the sunlight and everything, the grass was so vibrant… you were glowing! I couldn’t help it, so I drew you for reference. And then I painted you,” you said, calm and shrugging your shoulders. “I thought it was fitting, you in space, looking like you were at home. I wanted to incorporate something music and the closest thing I could do was Lyr-“

“Oh my goodness, Y/N. This much thought? You didn’t have to do any of this, I’m so grateful, I love it so much! But I’m just Brian, I don’t deser—”

“I wanted to do this, Bri. Trust me. You listened to me rant on and on and on about how my what I was doing didn’t look good, or what I was drawing, or how I was drawing something. You are so encouraging and attentive and just amazing, Bri, I couldn’t help it. It was really no problem. You deserve it. And there’s-there’s one more thing.” This was it! You weren’t really planning on telling him your feelings after showing him your piece but now here you were.

He asked, oblivious, “What thing?” Bri was beaming at his portrait and now beaming at you.

“I really like you, Bri. A lot. You’ve been there for a lot and we’ve supported each other and I just-” He hadn’t said anything. The same surprised look was still on his face. Fuck. “And I mean, like, you know, I j-“

He seemed extremely taken aback at your declaration but his face melted into tenderness. “I like you too, Y/N.”

You exhaled, “Thank god!” Both of you laughed, the shared relief between the both of you evident.

Brian leaned in and you closed the gap. His lips felt amazing against yours after all this time waiting and the moon shone softly upon you both as you shared this moment.

--

Brian :

Cancer: The Crab ~ his astrological sun sign

Circinus: The Compass ~ helps people find their way, ever helpful

Pyxis: The Compass ~ mariner’s compass, i feel like he j knows himself really well and he’s a water sign so lol

Telescopium: The Telescope ~ self-explanatory lol

Leo Minor: The Little Lion ~ his hair. roger got the “big” lion by default so i gave bri the little lion!

Lyra: The Harp ~ closest thing to music

Camelopardalis: The Giraffe ~ :pppp

Roger :

Leo: The Lion ~ his astrological sun sign

Phoenix: The Firebird ~ he fiery

Hercules: The Strong Man ~ i’d like to think he would request this himself once he saw the series of pieces you were doing.

Draco: The Dragon ~ why not, plus i feel like he’d like it

Vulpecula: The Little Fox ~ he got the foxy moxy.

Auriga: The Charioteer ~ apollo and his chariot, rog is the sun <3

Lynx: The Lynx ~ not a very easily seen constellation, so you need good eyesight to see it. i thought it was ironic because of rog’s bad eyes LOL

The girl in the painting (you know who you are :)):

Aquarius: The Water Bearer ~ her sun sign

Cassiopeia: The Queen ~ self-explanatory hah

Eridanus: The Celestial River ~ water, relates to sun sign

[sometimesrosy]

Ok so apparently the 100 is building a castle set w/a fancy staircase. And theres a few small red and yellow flagposts outside w/some christmas like trees. Wtf is going on?!? Lol the first thing that popped into my head when I saw it was the King/Knight and Queen/Princess reference for Bellamy and Clarke. Lol. I have no idea what's going on in this new planet. Or is a ball really happening like everyone is saying? Maybe like a peace conference ball type thing between Eligius and Earthlings? Lol.

OK, I wish y’all would post a link or site or search term when you come yelling about new information so I know where to go look and I’m not just going off second hand information. But I did find the bts pic.

I don’t know if that’s a castle, but the flags are banners and they are norfolk pines, not christmas trees.There does seem to be some pageantry involved with the banners and landscaping, which doesn’t fit either the wilderness or the high tech aesthetic, so it’s something DIFFERENT from what we’ve seen. There’s also topiary on the balcony.

 What I find interesting is the organic details on those stairs and backdrop, and I do not understand why the center of the set is orange while the outside of it is brown, which makes it look fake. So the conclusion I am coming to is that they will add special effects to it to make it also look…idk, more organic? Some sort of vines or lights or alien unusualness.??? There’s a bluescreen at the top, but the top edges are NOT finished and have no detail, especially not like the detailed organic shapes of the railing, which looks sloppy to me and will probably be fixed in post production. Which means to me, again, special effects. Also, there’s no place for anyone to stand near that bluescreen, so it’s just background. Maybe just the two suns, but maybe more. 

TBH, I don’t understand how any of you get Bellarke out of that. 

it’s a BUILDING. It’s worldbuilding, not character arcs. I wouldn’t use this to figure out an emotional narrative. I feel like this fandom wants to make everything about a clue to ships and that isn’t what everything IS. Sometimes a building is about…the setting. It gives us some aesthetic. Some background. Maybe history, mood. Relationships are details that exist WITHIN the world they build, but the background doesn’t tell us about relationships.

To me, with the late timing of that, this to me says alien society, or the hidden part of the Eligius society. Otherwise we would have seen this early on in the filming. But no, this isn’t part of the peaceful society we’ve heard about?? Or it’s a new part of it. I think it will be the strange part of it.

I’m still on the aliens thing. This is what we’ve been told would be happening. Whether that is alien world or alien planet. Eligius has been there about 200 years, and this building seems to have been there a while, right? Or I’m assuming it’s an established place, but it doesn’t look like something a technologically advanced culture post earth apocalypse would build, style wise. It’s slightly organic/gothic…. oh, maybe we’re going SOLARPUNK.

IDK. People’s frame of reference seems to be “prom,” or maybe Cinderella, but I have questions and thoughts about this all.

If it’s a ball or prom that they need a choreographer for, although unless it’s highly stylized group dancing (and why hire a choreographer who does contemporary/broadway numbers instead of a folk dancer or something?) then why hire only FOUR dancers for it?

Four dancers + choreographer makes me think more along the lines of performance, meeting, presentation of characters who are utilizing the dance to tell part of the story.

The choreographer and many of the dancers seem to have a strange element to their work. The choreographer has a straight up WEIRD alien like dance number on her website, one of the dancers dances off the ground. One of them DOES have a ball number in OUAT though. Yes I googled the dancers and choreographer.

Why is dance part of the story when it never has been before? That makes it strange to this kind of storytelling, which fits, as we’re on an alien planet.

Why is it introduced so late in the season? Again it is another unusual thing that our heroes haven’t seen yet. That makes it, to me, part of a revelation of story. Not actually about Bellarke, but about the planet, the alienness, the mystery of what happened to eligius 4, and the main plot and possible big bad.

This set is also introduced late in the season at the same time as choreographer, so the dancing and set seem to be connected. 

Perhaps there is a fairy tale element, or a dream element. They HAVE brought in fairy tales before, as early as the linctavia beauty and the beast storyline. BUT JR has referenced all movies and books that have an element of unreality, altered perception/time/reality, possible hallucination, dream or vision, so I find that just as likely as a ball. More likely. Do fairy tales have to be about princesses and balls? No. They don’t. Often they are about the deep dark woods, mystery, danger and magic. Even Disney does that. Fairy tale =/= romance.

What is with that weird orange color? At first I thought it was a sheet of plastic, but upon close viewing, there is a lot of textural and tonal detail IN the orange. However, the orange makes it look fake. Therefore I think it is one layer of what eventually will be some sort of digital effect. Maybe it’s like layers in a painting. Maybe that orange color is supposed to give the impression that the castle is GLOWING. ohhh. that would make sense.

Ok. The orange part of the castle kind of centers on that pretty organic archway with the kind of half mandala in it, that looks like a stained glass window, but it is not a perfect mandala or circle and the center of it is DEFINITELY organic like a tree root or octopus. AND the stone around it kind of warps like it is wrinkled or there is something growing under it. That shape is echoed in the bannister. Top edge of the castle also shows this wrinkle/warping, which is maybe why I thought it was a sheet of plastic at first. It’s not. It was designed to look like something organic, but in stone. where we can SEE the stone building blocks.

The castle is human sized. The steps are human sized so are the doors. This is a building for humanoids. However there are super tall archways that are NOT human sized. Why build an archway that tall when the others are human height?

A thing growing through a stone castle is not humanoid. 

A thing growing through a stone castle and then echoed in the architecture of said castle is not an enemy, but something that is honored or worshipped or followed. 

You know how Avatar (the movie with blue people) had that mother tree that was, like, the center of life and spirit?

Binch. If the alien on this planet is THE ACTUAL PLANET someone needs to come over here and do an exorcism to get Jason Rothenberg out of my head because I wrote this in a novel 12 years ago, which was ALSO about cryo sleep, which was part of how they got to the new planet to colonize it, which just so y’all know, I suggested as a way to be saved from praimfaya before season 4 started. BEFORE. In january. Also, my current series based on the same universe as that space colony one is called The Mandala Series. The first one was The Mythos Series. That thing in the center looks like a mandala. 

If the alien beings on this planet are actually part of the planet, or a non human entity, AND we get choreography that is weird and dancers that can dance while hanging in space off of poles or ropes or vines or tentacles, then I suggest that there is a hybrid human/alien element, and the dancers will represent that new hybrid. Again, another idea from my novel. I might just be too deep into my novel to separate, and am reading into it, but that is how I came up with cryo theory and it turns out I was right. 

JR is in my head. 

Honestly, I don’t know how you guy come up with Bellarke and commence freaking out. I come up with living alien planets and hybrid alien/humans and commence freaking out. No offense, but my idea is more interesting than a ball. I mean. Maybe it’s a ball. That would be…. fun. 

[levyfiles]

one thing i've noticed about the anti problem in this fandom is that it seems... pretty limited to this fandom. the last rpf fandom i was in had basically no antis. there were tons of fics (mostly "x reader") but nobody complained about the whole "they're real people" thing. heck, i've never seen an anti-sta/n/d/rew sentiment. idk what made this fandom different

Ooh nonnybabe, you’re preaching to the choir over here. I’m in the middle of writing me some demon!Shane so I’m in a mood to go off!

Listen, I’m coming from the depths of a fandom revolving entirely around variety shows, reality tv, documentaries and bands with members older than me where I’ve been for over five years. Rpf goes with the territory there and while I can absolutely guarantee there were people who weren’t into it, the stunning thing is that those people simply stated it as is, ‘Not in it for the ships but love the content.” 

I think turning your hobbies/interests/dislikes/likes into online activism is a pathology developed on this website where people frequently run activism blogs. There is nothing wrong with this practice but there is a Huge difference between cultivating a conversation about racism, transphobia, human trafficking, feminism, serial killer worship and xenophobia in a world rife with battles for basic humanity and finding a show you enjoy, discovering that the community who loves it too, and then dedicating your time towards ensuring that anyone who has a blog within the community does it according to your own standards all the while using sociological rhetoric to make it sound like you’re setting a precedent for good in the world.

The truth that a lot of these people don’t seem to understand is that the people they’re fighting on behalf of don’t give more than a shit about this strawman cause because it’s true, they’re real living people out there making the content they love, living private lives, regulating their public image (even encouraging mental headcanons about their alternate personalities presented in postmortems). They’re not spending their time scouring for blogs to find out if anyone is creating fictional universes where they’re not heterosexual. Antis claim that people will get out of hand, attack the guys, their public relationships, and make the entire show about the ship, but it’s not even Sh/yan shippers that are saturating the regular content because we regulate ourselves; when someone forgets themselves and posts in the main tag, other shippers kindly message them and inform them which tag is best to use. 

We’ve all noticed it. The only shipping content I see in the main tag is errant people with no concern for Ryan and Shane, they’re simply expressing disgust for something that wouldn’t impact them otherwise. On my end, I’m happy when someone posts their messy ass take in the tags because then I’ve got a name to block instead of having to go through the process of scanning and rerouting IPs for antis’ anonymous asks I delete once I’ve scrolled to them. And here’s the even more bizarre thing, these asks are violent, angry, rife with personal attacks and a deep desire to make me and others like me-- real living human beings they actually have access to--feel like shit. Self-righteous hatred and attacking strangers who aren’t hurting anyone for being into something you’re not into is silly and childish. Antis aren’t saving shit and they’re not making the community better; you don’t have to like it but curate your shit and leave people alone.

I’ve managed several healthy months of this experience without interacting with anyone toxic, deleting attention-hungry anons, and having a good time. I don’t even mind hanging with people who aren’t shippers-- hell, I got like four different non shipping people in my instant messages consistently who I Love talking to about ghosts, religion, movies, demons or mythology; one of y’all even came at me about Tom Cruise in Interview with the Vampire (you know who you is) because ultimately, we’re all here about the same two guys, the same show. and god forbid talented writers and artists coming from queer perspectives wanting to write and create within the fictional universes they can relate to. All the while we got actual antis going off about Shane being their bicon, being a demon, being Bigfoot, mothman or whatever the fuck, reveling in the details of his relationship with his girlfriend, putting themselves in her perspective and then turning around and shitting on anyone who say Shane and Ryan’s relationship is gorgeous and romantic depicted under the fictional lens of their friendship becoming something more. I think that says more about their views on Ryan and absolutely their views on heteronormativity than it does about protecting people who aren’t even in the shipping tag nor keeping mine or any blog on bookmark. 

Yo, that’s all I gotta say right now. Obviously none of this is to attack you, nonnyhoney; your ask just inspired some broiling ire in my heart I needed off my chest. 

[insecure-hbo-the-recaps]

backwards-like

ok ok, sorry sorry sorry i’m back. i’m a few weeks behind and watching these episodes for the first time no spoilers.

Previously on Insecure: Living with Daniel was a lick. Daniel wants to make connections at the club. We Got Y’all needs to hire people of color. And Molly switched to a black run law firm.

Looky looky looky. Issa and Daniel are sleeping in bed together, platonically of course. Daniel teases her and at first you think they are still playing platonic, but they soon begin kissing and Daniel goes down on her. There is totally a scene full of Issa Rae's naked pelvis and hard nipples which I have to say is an improvement over her very awkward sex scenes last season. I approve. Idk about the eating Flamin Hots while getting head, but I understand the sentiment being expressed. But then! That was a fake out too, yet another of Issa's frequent fantasies about the person she wishes she could be but is not, like yelling at her coworkers at work or going on dates with her ex who dumped her last season. She got me that time.

Why are they sleeping together platonically? Issa quickly rolls out of bed and leaves before acting on any of the things she's thinking.

Molly is taking her bulldog to the dog groomer. She hasn't started at her new job yet. Issa hasn't had the interview yet for the invitation she had in the last episode but Molly is just happy she will be getting her own place soon. Issa clearly isn't quite ready to leave the safety (not to mention financially beneficial) arrangement she has with Daniel, but isn't being totally honest about that. Her makeup looks fantastic though.

Molly doesn't see what the big deal is since Issa is sleeping on the couch, but Issa's awkward response makes it clear they she and Daniel have started sharing a bed. Like a good friend, Molly knows this isn't a good idea, but Issa defends her poor choices while eating a dog biscuit.

We Got Y'all is participating in like... a non profit fair or something? I really like Frieda in a supervisory role, and it looks like Issa is doing better from the redheaded stepchild position she had been in before.

Meanwhile, Molly is having her first day at her new law firm. Her dress has a confusing belt thing going on but a cute ribbon tie at the neck. She meets all of the staff and I enjoy just the concept of a firm staffed entirely by black people. That's a nice thing to see on TV. And the view isn't bad either.

Can I just say that I actually love LA? I expected to hate it and for it to be full of nothing but bleach blonde fake boobed bimbos. First of all the people were totally normal - far more "normal" "American" people than I was expecting, which is to say... overweight, basically. New York was a lot worse/better - nothing but thin and fit people in really fantastic clothes. I never saw a fat person in New York until I went to Times Square with the tourists. I could totally live in LA and be completely happy with the vibe, it is honestly not that dissimilar to Chicago at all. After visiting a few times I really don't know why people hate LA so much. You know what I hated was San Francisco... a surprisingly ugly city! And before I ever went to California I used to tell people if I were to live anywhere there it would probably be SF. Oof. That's what happens when you speak in ignorance, sis.

Daniel is working on a new track which sounds like a cross between a video game soundtrack and a sad "my life was hard" rap song. He's hoping Spyder will like it, and solicits criticism from his producer friend. I don't know his name, sorry. The producer friend doesn't like basically any of the components of the song and criticizes things he thinks Spyder won't like. I'm not sure if we should trust his opinion more than Daniel's at this point. The caption says that he "strips down" the beat. They both sound like the same sad ass song to me, so idk.  But Daniel is clearly uncomfortable with the criticism.

It turns out We Got Y'all is hosting a booth at a job fair, looking for the more black employees Issa suggested. Frieda and her manager haircut are happy with the turnout. For some reason, Dias de La Muerte dancers show up complete with a band and everything and I guess job fairs in LA are more interesting than any I've ever been to... which now that I'm thinking about it is zero...

It turns out this is part of a presentation for another employer that works with musically gifted kids in underrepresented neighborhoods. Issa goes over and talks to the staff there and seems impressed with their shtick. Or maybe impressed with the cutie manning the booth.

Uh oh. At Molly's new firm she's learning the office doesn't use standard tech that she's used to expediting her work with. Instead of DocuSign, they use Adobe and a courier. Yikes. I worked at a nonprofit that still didn't have efax and, why? This is the whole ass future. We wasted so much paper printing and faxing everything manually and they didn't even have the big blue recycling bins, which annoyed me to no end. They are also ok with CPT time on the courier deliveries, which is clearly unacceptable to Molly. Sigh. Why do we do this, you know?

Issa is meeting with the property management company and is being interviewed by an older black guy, which is a good sign. Let me reiterate that her makeup is lovely. It seems like the part time position is more the role of a super than... something Issa would really be interested in. She would also get a discounted apartment - about half off - that the interviewer is readily willing to give to her. He asks if she wants it, and at least she has a good bathroom mirror again with which to comtemplate it.

Later, Issa is tagging along with Daniel at the laundromat, who is complaining that his producer friend took out all the "musicianship" in his track - he wanted the string accompaniment, he wanted the instruments. Daniel is trying to elevate his production with Nordic influences and unique touches. Issa offers gently that when he gets to the next level he can do whatever he want, suggesting nonverbally that he should play the game for now and get creative later.

Issa tells him she picked up the second job, so now she can move out. Daniel points out that three jobs is a lot but Issa, perhaps pressured by Molly and Kelly, is really focused on getting her own place. Daniel tells her he really doesn't mind, and their chemistry is lovely as they flirt and get in each others' faces. They are doing a good job of building the tension because I really just want them to bone already.

Back at Molly's firm, a coworker asks if she wants to take a walk for lunch because she's in a fitbit challenge with her MiL. I am sharing data from my Apple watch with my sister and my niece and biiiitch... being a child is the best. She regularly gets 500+ move points a day while I struggle to reach 400, wtf is this child doing all day? She clearly moves so much more often during a day than I do, lol. No wonder we get fat as we get older. However Molly turns down this invitation - she is used to working through lunch, in case you weren’t picking up on all the signs that the black owned firm does not run as strenuously compared to the white-run environments that Molly is used to. The emphasize the point, the storage room is just randomly inside the building instead of offsite, as Molly would have expected. She clearly is not a good fit for this environment, and honestly she should just acknowledge that.

Girls night. The four girls are at a bar listening to Molly complain about the firm. Issa points out there are Mexican law firms as well, for Molly to complain about. Of course Tiffany, the obnoxious one, agrees that black things are janky. I mean... this is not an argument I want to get into for obvious reasons.

The girls go through examples of supporting and not supporting black businesses - Tiffany loves Beyonce, so although she signed up for Tidal she never goes on it. Kelly has a white accountant even though she herself is an accountant. I feel like this all the time. I feel pressured to give clicks to black articles, lol. I feel guilty for skipping links on Twitter about "black issues." I feel a responsibility to care and show support even about things that I don't fucking actually give a fuck about. Also Issa is wearing a dress that definitely showed up in some pivotal scene last season.

Tiffany hints about the changes from pregnancy - she hates that she can't fit her clothes anymore and she's being excluded from group chats. But the overall point is Molly should give the situation some time and try to adjust. Is Amanda Diva really pregnant IRL? Her pregnancy belly is realistic.

Kelly was helping Issa find an apartment - the best she could do with Issa's credentials is something with a "half bath," which, biiiiitch. So Issa breaks the news that she is, in fact, going to stay with Daniel a little longer. They're not sleeping together and they're getting along so she doesn't see what the problem is. Her friends try to convince her there is a problem, and shit like this scene is why I don't listen to bitches when it comes to my romantic life. Don't need all that extraneous input on what choices to make that are best for ME.

Back at We Got Y'all, Issa and Frieda are interviewing one of the people that showed up at the job fair. For some reason, Issa clearly isn't feeling it - and why is she taking part of this interview in the first place? Is it literally just because they need a black opinion on who to hire? The girl compliments Issa's sweater, perhaps perceiving the bad vibes she's kind of rudely wafting. The candidate asks sincerely what Issa thinks of the job, and Issa answers honestly that "they are how they are." When Issa says she's been there five years and the candidate concludes that Issa must really like it, she blanches with no response. But later, Issa checks out the website for the musical empowerment employer, so maybe she will find the motivation to make a change.

More of Molly's black firm, more of her disdain for the loose standards. This time they call her out, and everyone at the table laughs politely.

Check out Daniel! Despite Spyder's reluctance, apparently they have established a working relationship as Spyder shows up at the studio to meet with Daniel and the other engineer. It turns out a friend of Spyder did get shot at the club the other night. He probably died because when Daniel asks if Spyder is alright, Spyder takes a beat and responds "....nah."

Daniel plays his track for Spyder instead of the pared down version his producer recommended. The producer asks if Spyder wants to hear the other version and Daniel is clearly annoyed at this power move. He does play the producer - Khalil's - version, and Spyder thinks that version is hot as well. At first you aren't sure if Khalil is really being a snake - clearly both versions are good, just for different sensibilities - but then he takes over the session and starts playing more of his own stuff, to Daniel's chagrin.

Issa and Daniel are having dinner... I wanna say at Gladstone's! But that's a totally uneducated guess, lol. Daniel is in a bad mood, but Issa is oblivious. "Is that Jay-Z and Beyonce?" she says; "No, it's us! We cute!" she playfully jokes. This breaks through Daniel's bad mood, and Issa explains she wanted to thank him for his generosity, but she is going to take the part time job and move out. Daniel responds petulantly, and eventually explains the snake move by Khalil in the studio. Surprisingly, Issa takes Khalil's side, saying that Khalil knows what Spyder likes, and Daniel would be squandering this opportunity to be so prideful.

Daniel says he thinks it's funny that Issa is giving *him* career advice and... while maybe that's valid, does Daniel even have a job that pays actual money? Cause I have to say I have not seen any evidence of that over the last three seasons. He throws his "saving you from some shit" actions in her face and Issa is understandably hurt. The dinner is ruined. They still sleep together in the bed that night but they are turned away from each other in terse silence.

Daniel halfway apologizes for taking out his issues with Khalil on her but Issa only dryly replies that it's fine. He turns over and starts spooning and kissing her, which she reluctantly gives into. Toxic. I mean, I get it, but fuck, toxic relationships. It seems redundant to even complain about it because, fuck it, aren't we all toxic sometimes too - it's not always just the other person. This time, he goes down on her for real.

Unfortunately, Issa isn't into it. She says it doesn't feel right, and I don't blame her. They lie next to each other awkwardly and eventually turn away from each other again.

the soundtrack says something something something about loving each other despite their pride and yeah... I get it, lol. I would have got it without the on the nose elaboration.

[joannalannister]

Would you consider Cersei's sexual intercourse with Lancel or Kettleback to be non-consensual on her or either of the knight's (well....I mean mostly Lancel's) part?

I think sex and violence are closely linked in Cersei’s mind. Even during both of the times we see Cersei and Jaime have sex on the page, there’s a lot of sexual aggression** involved (see: 1, 2). 

For Lancel, I think he was raped by Cersei. @turtle-paced has a good post about Lancel and Cersei over here. 

I think Westeros believes that only a man can commit rape, but that belief is obviously wrong. Even if Westeros doesn’t really have much understanding of male rape victims, I think we can still consider Lancel a rape victim. 

(Fun (meaning horrifying!) fact: Even in our own world, up until 2012, the FBI used a gendered definition of rape, defining it as “The carnal knowledge of a female forcibly and against her will.” The new definition defined rape as “penetration […] without the consent of the victim,” without any gender specifications. This broader definition that would include male rape victims didn’t go into effect until 2013. And we all thought Westeros was Fucked Up….)

Here’s a story of a real-life male rape survivor that actually reminds me of Lancel:

Dated a girl for three years. My first. I was the first one amongst my friends to be in a relationship which I think kept me in it for so long. Feeling that I should be grateful and having something to prize.

Anyhow, turns out she was manipulative, emotionally violent and at rare occasions physically violent. None of which I could see at the time.

I had zero experience or things to compare it to. It took me about a year after she dumped me to have the thought: ‘That… was probably not good.’ […]

I’ve come to realise it wasn’t even about the sex. It was about control. She didn’t seem interested at all, sometimes watching TV and just keeping at it.

Lancel, at only 15/16, was very naive and inexperienced. (Cersei might even have been the very first woman he was with, idk.) 

Rape is considered to be a way to exert power over someone, to control them, and power and control are central to Cersei’s storyline. Cersei saw that she could use sex as a way to control Lancel and make him a pawn in her game against Tyrion. 

(Some might argue that sex with Lancel was about personal gratification for Cersei (“even a poor copy of Jaime is sweeter than an empty bed“), but as Cersei tells us, “It had never been any good with anyone but Jaime.” So no, I don’t think this was about Cersei’s pleasure, I think this was about power and control for Cersei, especially at a time when Cersei feels control slipping away from her (Joff ordering the execution, Jaime’s capture, Tyrion’s arrival in KL, etc).) 

Lancel says, “I never meant … I only did as I was bid, I …”

I think this strongly suggests that Cersei ordered Lancel to have sex with her (~as I was bid~). Similar to the tactics that Petyr uses to manipulate Sansa, I think Cersei is holding a lot over Lancel, making him complicit in Robert’s death. 

“The Hand serves,” the young knight informed him airily. “The regent rules until the king is of age.”

Lancel views Cersei as someone with great power and authority. I don’t think Lancel was ever in any position to say no to Cersei (the same way that he’s not in a position to say no when Tyrion starts to use him/blackmail him). 

And it’s really sad, how horribly Westeros treats male rape victims, because men are treated very similarly in our own world. In real life, men are expected to conform to certain stereotypes about gender, such as the idea that men should relish any opportunity for sex, especially sex with attractive women. 

“it is moreacceptable for a woman to deny sexual access to a man than for a man to deny sexual access to a woman. Even insituations involving minor sexual violations (such as non-consensual kissing), participants regarded it as moreacceptable for a woman to violate a man’s sexual consent than the other way around“

In one study, participants, particularly other men, were intolerant of men refusing sex: “One said ‘Don’t be a wuss,’ another said that he would love a woman to do that to him” In a study conducted in 1988, sexual abuse was found to be “even seen as a positive or“educational” experience for the victim” if the victim was a male around the age of 15. 

And this is what we see with Lancel:

Lancel lifted the cup and drank, albeit stiffly. “Smile, cousin. My sister is a beautiful woman, and it’s all for the good of the realm.”

Like, it’s all there. Cersei’s beautiful, so why wouldn’t Lancel want to have sex with her, huh? Lancel should be ~grateful~ And Tyrion won’t let him refuse. Lancel is a “weakling” the same way that other men are “a wuss”. 

And GRRM clearly wants us to realize that what’s happening to Lancel is wrong:

Tyrion allowed himself a moment to feel sorry for the boy. Another fool, and a weakling as well; but he does not deserve what Cersei and I are doing to him.

And this whole experience has completely ruined Lancel’s life. Lancel’s sad to me :( None of this makes me love Cersei any less as a character, but I think she does some really horrible things, like using people and then throwing them away. Lannisters are sad :(

***

For Kettleblack … 

First of all, I have to say, I am SO GLAD to know that I am not alone in reading and sometimes writing that name as “Kettleback” because I do that too and I only recently realized that it was KettlebLack, as in “pot calling the kettle black”.

Second of all, I CANNOT tell the Kettleblack brothers apart and I have to go to the wiki right now to figure out which brothers we’re talking about lmao. 

…ok we’re talking about Osney (youngest) and Osmund (KG) ok…

Osney …. Like … maybe Osney could have … not killed the High Septon … if he didn’t want to sleep with Cersei? Yes, there is a power imbalance between Cersei and Osney, but I think we have bigger concerns here. Like murder. 

And Osmund … I’m going to relinquish all of my ASOIAF street cred and admit that I have no memory of Cersei sleeping with Osmund?? I know Tyrion gives his name to Jaime (along with Lancel (true) and Moonboy (false)). And I know Cersei names all three Kettleblack brothers, claiming she slept with all three of them for whatever reason. But I literally can’t remember any passage where we see Cersei sleep with Osmund??  So I really can’t say on this one. 

And plus, aren’t the Kettleblacks all working for Littlefinger? I really don’t want to touch the mess that is espionage and consent, at least not on this website. 

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** Y’all know I ship Jaime and Cersei like burning, I don’t say that as a knock against them, I love my dysfunctional fucked up children, and I personally believe that both times we see J/C together in the books it’s consensual, but it’s … aggressive. 

And obviously I understand why Cersei associates sex and violence – because Westerosi society is horrible and because Cersei herself has suffered so much – but the acts of sexual violence that Cersei chooses to enact on other people are inexcusable. I love her, but she does horrible things.