#idk if it'll get finished because i'm not sure i'll be able to actually do what i have in mind

[ferberus-skull]

mayyyy or may not be working on a thylacine based skin for her (benjamin).....

[bluebunnysart]

(Chimera Teto x Android Miku WIP, another one, yeah, another one lol)

I may not finish WIPs but I can definitely start new drawings!! 😂Hahahaha ! I always try to make them chibis (for simplicity) but I also want to draw details/the full body, so of course it turns into a double full-body drawing that takes forever.... This isn't even the final lineart obviously but it's almost 5 AM again and I know I'm gonna fuss with this some more, so I guess here's a WIP so I can show off what I did at least tonight xD In case I decide to do other things in the meantime...

Tell me why I literally spent like 2 hours (fr) trying to draw Miku 'cuz Miku is hard asf to draw and challenges me to draw better 😂😂😂😂 Anyway (a long-ish) explanation of stuff under the read more 'cuz I don't want to take up people's dashboards. When I finally finish this drawing or the other one, I won't have to yap as much in the post too. xD

A series of things happened today that led to me creating this drawing. (Miku's prefinal lineart is done too btw, I'm just not showing her to you 'cuz no point spoiling the whole drawing lol, plus I might make changes.)

I went to the store for a brief moment 'cuz all my pens kept running out of ink and I was annoyed I didn't have any reliable pens and I wanted a pen to write a continuation to this AU, right.

When I went to the store, there was a song playing and I thought it sounded nice, what little I heard of it before I had to return to work. So once I left the store and was able to look at my phone again, I looked up this song through the lyrics I heard and I found it. And the whole song was even better than I thought: the lyrics and music are INCREDIBLY sweet and now I really like it. xD

Besides liking it in general as a song (this genre of song), I was ALSO super into it because I thought, "This is super End of the World AU-coded (Android Miku x Chimera Teto)" and it made me so happy, excited, and giddy lol.

Like, listen to this...

"When the cloud's above your head / And the sun's not breaking through / You know I'll be there to sing this song for you. / And it goes: / La la la / la la la la la~..."

This is absolutely something the Miku in my AU would sing. This is absolutely a song she and Teto would listen to together-- like, I could draw them listening to it together and that's actually practically what my drawing is lol. I could draw an animatic or make an MV to this song about them... I could make a comic where Miku is singing this directly to Teto and persuades her to sing it with her, especially the chorus (la la la) parts. I smile because in the first fic, Miku also goes "lalala~" (idk the number of la's lol), and it's not like what she sings is this or anything, but it's a small connection that I like. xD I literally discovered this song only today but this is absolutely a song Teto would have in either one of the cassette players or in the MP3 player. This song matches them and the AU too so Miku would absolutely sing it and like it a lot too. This song made me think of my AU and I was already excited/trying to keep writing more so I could get to the good parts, so finding this song made me really excited, ok. xD

Also I'm not sure how you WOULDN'T adore Miku if she sang something like this, especially directly to Teto (her only audience).

All the sweet lines and stuff made me super soft, so I put this song on loop and literally played it for hours. The whole time I was drawing too. It's just so cute and fitting and it's what made me create art for this AU again instead of making Turing Love fanart or one of the other dozens of ideas I have and whatnot. xD

That was a lot of words to explain what prompted this drawing in the first place when it wasn't planned in the slightest, but now I'll talk more about the drawing itself.

I was inspired by all the fanart I've received so far! It'll show in the final drawing. c: But when drawing this, I was looking at Slyvasta's art since I wanted to draw Slyvasta's version of Teto too. Teto is easiest to draw imo, so we've got the scarf, horn, wings, and tail. The pupils were actually added at the very end 'cuz Slyvasta's has sharp pupils and I thought that was cool and a good idea lol: this Teto's eyes can have sharp pupils (dragon/reptile-like) while Miku's eyes are more round yet robotic.

I was thinking about the flavor of tsundere that Teto is (in my AU) and this drawing was partially inspired by me wanting to clarify stuff about that. xD I did call her "cool, gruff, indifferent, etc." which is all true and does apply, but she's still playful and can be lively, even if she's been beaten down by exhaustion and gloominess, as I've mentioned. In other words, she never was a complete downer or anything (I know I said that before), but I wanted to clarify that she's not, like, the cold type who's ONLY frowning or who's grumpy either.

If I think about it, the "trying to act cool/indifferent" thing is mostly an act I think, yeah. xD Like, of course she'll frown or have a neutral uninterested expression if she's bored or she's been through annoying experiences (like starving or encountering various issues), but she's still kicking, if that makes sense. Like, the enthusiasm and zest for life isn't exactly there, but she's doing what she can to get by. I guess she's more of the type to distract herself and focus on other stuff so she doesn't get too existential? So it's not like she isn't lowkey depressed-- she's just the type to make jokes about it. She's basically original mischievous Teto but with some baggage she's carrying.

This might seem like a weird post now based on the stuff I'm writing LOL but I really did think about it, ok. xD The way to characterize her. And she has really valid reasons to be sad and everything, but she's not as harsh and edgy as her appearance implies. That's something that I really like about her: the gap moe lol.

So what does this mean in relation to Miku? Well, Teto is a pretty normal girl who's cool and nonchalant. She's probably arrogant in a cute way too, judging from her catchphrase and how she likes acting like a know-it-all and being praised/appreciated. But basically, the tsundere mainly comes out whenever she gets embarrassed.

The Teto in my AU can smile and has a couple of times, and she's nice because she helps Miku out before she even knows Miku that well. So....

She's probably the type to send Miku soft smiles without even realizing it. Like, she relaxes a lot and is happy or something and then her expression will turn so warm or gentle, I'm pretty sure. 🥰 Her tail and body language already gives her away, so I love the idea of her expression changing into a really affectionate one before she even notices or realizes it. She realizes she's been smiling the whole time after 5 whole minutes pass or Miku points it out and then she's like, "I-I wasn't smiling or anything?! (unsure why she's immediately denying it)" lol.

Anyway, THAT'S when the tsundere comes out. She isn't tsundere towards Miku unprompted, and even though Teto doesn't know how to deal with Miku YET, that doesn't mean Teto walks on eggshells around her or is curt/cold to her. Teto acts very naturally and herself-- she only gets tsundere whenever she's NOT acting like herself, aka being really weak or soft for Miku at different moments.

Her tsundere is a weak kind of tsundere too (unlike Neru, who isn't in this AU anyway), so she'll just get embarrassed or lie or act kinda awkward or prickly to hide her embarrassment (maybe a sharp word or two, along the lines of "Shush" and "Shuddup"), but in the end, she's a very cute and kind girl. 🥰 They both are 🥰🥰🥰

It might take me one or two more iterations before I'm finally satisfied with the final lineart, but this time, I made the time lapse longer, so you'll be able to see how I struggled to draw Miku for like 2 whole hours. xD

This, too, I want to color. I actually wanted to color my first drawing first, but then I discovered the song I mentioned earlier and it made me so hyped up that I wanted to create a whole new piece about it. Along with the other two songs that I associate with this AU, I was really happy to find yet another one. This song is cute in general too, so it was immediately added to my Motivation playlist. xD

With how hard Miku is to draw and how long drawing takes in general, it makes me even more impressed with Miku artists lol. Like, Miku is so demanding but I love her so of course I'll push through until I do her justice... I'm slow because I care a lot and want to do these two right, ok... xD Lineart and the like is more in my comfort zone, but I'll definitely tackle coloring soon; tonight's session only proves that it'll take longer than I expected/5 hours lol.

I'm not only planning to create stuff for my AU only-- I want to make all kinds of Mktt stuff. But I was really inspired by other people's art and this time, I even drew with their art in mind lol.

I have no idea how long it'll take, but I'll continue to make more art! To me, it's the clearest way I show/understand my love lol. I've been inspired seeing other people's art too, so I definitely wanted to draw my own....

Anyway, time to go tf to sleep. (it's 6 AM 😅)

[nattikay]

fursuit making update: between waiting for supplies and an out-of-town family emergency last week, progress has been slow...but not nonexistent! Here's a messy pile of half-finished paws lol

If all goes well I should have them done sometime this weekend! They wound up taking a ton more fur than I was expecting though, so I might have to order another half yard or so of white...we'll see.

Once the paws are done though, I'll move on to the tail, then the wings I think, then the main body, and last but certainly not least, the head!

...speaking of which, my base came today!! It's the Stuffed Panda Studios kemono feline :) There were two size options and I wasn't sure which one to get, I wound up going with the smaller one since I thought it'd fit better, but was slightly worried that it would end up looking too small in person. Opening it up today and comparing it to my current head, though, it seems to be about the same size, or at least very close to it! Especially when you pat down the fur of the current head to feel where the actual base is under all the fluff. I think once the new head's got the ears and all the fur and stuff on it, the size difference is gonna be minimal. So yay!

I'm planning to do the printed iris method again too, so between that and the enormous iris holes in the eye blanks, this kitty's gonna have INCREDIBLE vision lol. My current head already has pretty good vision as far as fursuits go so this one's bound to be even better!

Gonna be opening up the mouth too, you're supposed to be able to prop it open if you cut along those little lines on the sides (though I'll admit I'm a bit nervous to actually do it because I don't want to accidentally mess it up 😭). Theoretically it should allow you to make a moving jaw too, which is...tempting...when I first became interested in fursuiting I was very enamored with the idea of a moving jaw, but I'm not as gung-ho about it now...still a cool feature for sure but I'm not as attached to the idea as I used to be. My main hangup is that last time I tried to fur a proper moving jaw I really struggled with making it look nice, and idk if I want the feature badly enough to attempt it again if it'll risk a poorer finish. But I'm considering it...we'll see. Gonna be a while till I make it to that part of the process anyways!

[cuephrase]

2, 5, 6, 7, 9, 29, 30 for comics

coming from this ask game

2. The most recent comic you got

The Boy Wonder #4

picked it up this wednesday at my LCS, (along with batman #151 and absolute power #2), i have seriously enjoyed this black label mini sm so far and this issue made me so soft and melty inside fr

5. The oldest comic you have

New Teen Titans Annual #1

this came out august 19, 1982, so it's...like ten days away from being 42 years old? neat!!

6. The comic you were most excited to find

Nightwing (2011) #15

so this a screenshot bc i actually got this as a gift for my brother-in-law!!

mini story time: when i decided i wanted to start reading bat comics, i went to him and asked where to start for nightwing and he loaned me his collection of n52 nightwing with great excitement lmao. (he started reading nightwing midway through this run releasing- it's what got him into nightwing- no judging allowed!!) this was the first series he started collecting/one of the two he kept when he sold most of his collection to pay for his honeymoon.

he didn't have the whole run though, (which omg we talked about pricing and it is wild how much the value of a comic book fluctuates), so i decided to get the handful of issues he was missing for him as a birthday gift. this was really easy except for this issue bc it has two covers. this one, and a joker version. i passionately hate the joker cover but it was the only one i could find- in person or online, so i almost gave up. being patient paid off, though, and i was able to get him the cover i wanted!! very exciting. plus!! he was so stoked when he saw the cover bc, as it turns out, he also hated the joker cover, which is why he didn't own the issue

7. The comic you searched for the longest

Red Robin #25

i started collecting red robin on oct 15, and i got this issue (the last one i needed), on feb 20, so it took a little over four months. i usually have pretty great luck at finding what i'm looking for the day i go looking for it lol, so this was super satisfying to bring home for a variety of reasons

9. The longest comic/collected edition you have

New Teen Titans Omnibus Vol. #1, Robin 80th Anniversary: 100-Page Super Spectacular

i'm pretty sure the ntt omni is bigger than any of the saga omnis i have, but i will confess i did not check page count. fun fact tho, i got this signed by marv wolfman. got to chat with him for a bit about tim, nightwing, and getting into the industry which was super neat.

and then the robin 80th is the longest single i own. i think? again, did not check page count but i can't think of anything longer. i don't think b:ul or wf3 are longer?

29. The comic you're currently reading...

...(or want to re-read soon)

Superboy (1994) #1, Robin (1993) #1, Young Justice (1998) #1

i just started reading superboy today!! i've been looking forward to reading him for awhile and finally made it to him, woo!! enjoying it so far too :)

and then i'm just kinda constantly in a state of wanting to re-read robin and yj98 lmao. idk if it'll happen 'soon', idk why but i get super squirrelly about re-reading when i have other stuff on my tbr 😅. i don't have that many titles left on my tbr so. i'll either finish my tbr or break somewhere and re-read. i honestly don't know lmao

30. Dealer's choice: a random comic!

Nightwing (2016) #87

i got this bad boy for free because i made the vendor laugh 😎 (disclaimer, ship who you want, i'm not judging or looking for a fight, okay? okay cool.)

i was at the Collectibles Warehouse (generic made-up name) with my dad for the first time, super fun, and he was helping me look/asking questions as we went. the vendor saw me looking through his nightwing stuff and started telling me about an issue of batgirl (babs) he had just sold, the first time they kissed i think? first something for dickbabs.

dad: "oh first kiss, that's pretty cool, do you want to see that one?"

me: "no, i'm okay"

dad: "i thought you liked him with the redhead??"

me, laughing: "i do, but the redhead i like is starfire"

dad: "he's been with multiple redheads?!"

me, dying laughing: "yes"

dad (stage whisper): "so you don't ship him with her...are they a bad couple?"

me: "...i just prefer him with starfire"

vendor, apparently eavesdropping, burst out laughing: "i had no idea young people still shipped those two! dc's been pushing dickbabs so hard, i thought all the kids liked them. man i love when he's with starfire. you want that comic?" (i was holding the comic, about to show my dad bc, yk, pretty cover) "for you, that one's free"

me: "are you sure?!" (this was a more expensive one- not like Expensive, just above retail)

vendor: "oh yeah, you just made my whole day"

never think i'll experience that again, very entertaining series of events.

bonus: dad's reaction to the cover

dad: "oh my. his pants are very...shiny. look at his thighs! he has very nice thighs, wow"

me: "dude, ikr!!"

tysm for the ask, anon!! i hope you enjoyed the answers :)

[livsspecialinterests]

don't really know what I'm writing or why but it's 0350am and I'm sitting in bed unable to get back to sleep having a weird slight panic

idk whether I'm feeling a bit of a writing slump because I know that the dead should stay dead still has quite a way to go and some part of me worries that by the time I've gotten at the very least to the next big plot point a lot of people may very well have lost interest in the fandom

like I know it's silly because there's probably always going to be some sort of fandom around BJTM but this little community means so much to me and has meant so much to me during a really difficult and life altering time, I mean for gods sake I started writing fics to try to figure out my own meltdowns

plus at this point I really have no other strong interests, idk maybe I'll get super into Doctor Who again with the specials and the new series starting but I've really gone hard on the One Interest

I really love the last few chapters of the dead should stay dead but it's felt a bit different writing them. maybe it's because I feel a little guilty spending whole days on chapters when I've got so much that I need to do for work (I know it sounds sad but there's exams, portfolio etc), plus I'd really like to give writing original fiction another go

there's also that gnawing fear that the fandom is going to like... vanish, which again is probably not true in its entirety but once the tour ends I can see some people falling off or finding another thing

also people leaving or drifting away from the fandom is a completely okay thing to do I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad if that's what they want to do

it's also not to say that people are obliged to engage with or comment on my fics or hell even read them, of course no one *has to* do anything in fandom it's a bunch of people just having fun

I know I should just write for my own fun and enrichment but external validation is nice, okay? plus these past few weeks the external validation and thinking 'no, I want to write this for the people who are reading the fic and want to know what happens next' have been big motivators

my main motivator used to be this absolutely unstoppable creative drive and love for the show and it's characters (which is still there, I'm unfortunately going to love this silly show until the day I die I think) but this past week I've found that I'd rather study for my work exams than spend time writing a few paragraphs

if I cool it off a little with the frequency of chapter updates it'll probably be a net good for me, I really need to buckle down and get these exams passed, I need to start actually engaging in planning my career because I think in my head I've been thinking I might get a book published one day and as a result I've been sort of half neglecting the actual really decent career I've got

but also my mental health is so much better, I've mostly healed from a lot of my late diagnosed autistic trauma, plus work is actually quite good right now?

maybe more of my writing for BJTM fics was motivated by being mentally ill than I originally thought, and maybe I don't *need* to write fics anymore but I want to and I want to still love writing fics as much as I did back when I was having that difficult time, where it was a huge personal comfort to be able to write Beej having a hard time in very specific ways and have other people comfort him

I have said to my husband that I'll probably cool it with the fics once I've finished the dead should stay dead and am going to focus my creative energy on something original to see where that goes but there's still so much to go on the dead should stay dead..

that silly little fic has become like my baby, I want to write it all, flesh out the characters before the next Big Thing happens, I want to do my ideas justice but I also want to make sure there are people still in the fandom to read it once I get to that point

again I'm super tired it's the middle of the night and I'm rambling, I don't want to imply that anyone reading this should carry on reading something they don't enjoy, and I don't even think the number of people reading the fic has even gone down, I've just woken up this morning full of dread for the fandom changing because, fandom and interests wise, BJTM is kind of all I've got right now.

I didn't really belong to a fandom for years after BBC Sherlock ended and I realised while watching the 4th series that it wasn't that good there was just a very passionate fan base and that's what I likes (I know, I know), BJTM was the first thing I got really into for ages and the first thing I got really into while figuring out what it was that I got *really into* stuff (autism)

obviously no one has to stick around in a fandom for the benefit of a silly autistic fanfic author whos terrified of change, and please, please don't think that's what I'm implying or what I want

ughh idk what I'm even writing, I should probably just reach out more to people but doing that is scary without the buffer of a fic

I should also probably invest more time in doing stuff irl but I know that no hobby gives me the joy that writing gives me, like when I'm really vibing with something there really are few better things for me than being safe at home and writing

also maybe I should try to get into some other stuff but I don't really want to but equally I know the BJTM fandom isn't going to last forever I just.... 🙃

the silly musical and the silly community that has sprung up around it and making art and writing fics for it has saved me in so many ways I'm just scaaarrreedddd (and also tired and typing this at 4am so I might be being dramatic for nothing, plus I know I struggle with assuming any fleeting emotion is going to last forever, maybe I'll feel different in a weeks time idk)

anyway I'm going to try to get a little bit more sleep because I've got to be up for work at 6 for my actual grownup job that I should probably pay more attention to

(this is also totally not some way to subtly say I'm not going to finish the dead should stay dead BTW, I love that fic and I'm proud of what it is and what I've got planned for it, so to the people who are still reading please don't worry 💜)

[regular-lord-reckoner]

it is spring time and appropriately, i have been a very busy bee !!

i'm on much needed pto and it is wonderful. i somehow managed to get completely caught up on all my work before i left so i'm not stressed about when i go back next week

i've mostly been sleeping a lot which i desperately needed and i've been doing a lot of things i've meant to for a while now

namely scheduling doctors appointments and updating my insurance everywhere i need to and that sort of shit, plus some legal stuff my mom and i are doing for some of my dad's stuff.

since monday i also started finally working on my closet again. i had to stop last time and toss everything back in there because...yeah, but now that i can spread some things out again i've made a lot of progress so far

every day i go in with the goal of getting out at least one bag of stuff to throw away and i've also moved out a bunch of clothes i'll need to sort through and a few other things i might be able to give away

feel like i can actually breathe in there again so that's nice. needed that. i'll probably work on it some more over the next two days and then take a break but it should be a lot easier now that i've really gotten the ball rolling to finish it up and fingers fucking crossed this time it'll be all done by the fall where it can just be my nice closet again and i can actually find things !!

i also finally went to get my oil changed today and fortunately there were no other problems so that went smoothly !! i got it washed, too (not that it matters now because it's pouring rain outside now lol) and i stopped to get my mom a birthday card and a gift bag for her present since her birthday is on monday !!

other than all of that i'm just trying to take it easy and unwind. trying to still rest a lot and not push myself too hard or do anything i don't feel up to.

for the past, mmm, i dunno, while i've just been full of piss and vinegar if that wasn't evident so i've tried to just be real quiet and keep to myself until i can feel less overwhelmed.

i'm still in that time out corner for now but i'm starting to feel a lot better so that's something! i've been doing a lot of cleaning lately as well (i did my bathroom on monday and will be doing laundry all throughout the week as week as well as the usual dishes and garbage duty) so that usually helps me feel a bit better.

it's also very cathartic just...throwing a bunch of shit away !! and having more space !! yay !!

oh, i also finally had therapy again after like...a month and i'm not sure yet what my new insurance situation will look like, but i think we're all happy to be done with my old insurance (she was telling me about something weird they did that i just...cannot fathom (something about mailing her a paper credit card that no one would accept ?? idk), but oh well, good riddance !!) and i'm slowly but surely working on paying her back !!

lastly, i tried a new coffee place today because i'm still trying to figure out which local coffee spot will be my new favorite now that i no longer haunt starbucks or dunkin and i went to this new one today and i....i definitely ordered a chai...a 32 oz one at that because why not, i love chai.... whatever they gave me definitely was not chai.

i'm not sure what it is exactly, but it's definitely got coffee in it and i thought at first maybe it was a dirty chai but no. and it's no big deal, i took it and just drove on but what's baffling to me is i was the only customer at that time.

nobody in front of me, no one behind me and maybe they were doing a mobile order or something but i had to sit there for a few minutes while they made it and it was...not at all what i was expecting, but also not bad !! haven't had an iced coffee in a minute so i'll take it !! (they also put a little chocolate covered espresso bean on the top which was very good)

anyway, i thought that was kinda funny. i've also finished all my chores and errands for the day now so i might take a nap or i might read or who knows what i might do, i actually have time to myself !!!!

just wanted to give a little update since for once it isn't me just bitchin' about things XD

hope if you're reading this that you're doing well and i'll be back to being a human (or as close to it as i get) ....sometime !! <3

[netherfeildren]

hiiii idk why i’m weirdly nervous to even send this ask bc you’re truly my favorite writer. i was wondering if you would ever consider writing a (joel x reader) story without smut? or maybe not fully without it, just not focused or centered on the actual sex? i can’t really articulate what i’m saying, i’m sorry. please don’t get me wrong, i think i would die without having your smut to read, but i just love your writing so much and think about it so often and the parts that always stick with me are the tender moments, the emotional turmoil, the intimacy. so i always wonder what a full story like that from you would be like? idk i really hope you don’t take this the wrong way because i truly love and won’t stop reading anything you write. idk i feel like such a sappy nerd for even saying this out loud. i hope you get what i’m trying to say, and don’t take this as being unappreciative of what you write, because it’s really the opposite. this is just my awkward love letter to you and your work. ok bye 🫣

hi honey, please don't feel bad or awkward at all! I think I do understand what you mean. I can see how it can kind of seem like sex is used as an emotional crutch in fic and it definitely can fee like that when writing on my end as well like... the pressure to include smut bc it engages better and garners more attention etc. I worried about that when posting the first chapter of pink, and then on the complete opposite, for a while I felt that there was too much sex in tcc and was sort of fretting over that but then told myself that it's the main way they're connecting and communicating at this point in their relationship so it makes sense for them now.... and spoiler alert, there will not be any sex for a while in that one soon. and then on the opposite side of the spectrum again, my new Joel story, I think as I'm seeing it unfold at this point, will actually be somewhat of a slowburn and there's a lot of plot details moving around in that despite the fact that the entire thing happens in the same place the whole time, there's almost no geographical movement if that makes sense. I haven't exactly worked out the nature of the sex at this point and I'm not sure if it'll be a huge focus or somewhat peripheral but this is what I know of the story thus far.

I'm not sure if this has answered your question, it probably hasn't, and I'm sorry for that. but again, please don't feel awkward at all I entirely see and understand what it is you're trying to say. will I ever be able to write a romantic relationship without sex? I'm not sure, I use sex as a crutch in relationships in real life too, lol not to show my ass on here or anything, so it would go without saying that the sentiment translates in my writing as well. I did have an idea some time ago for something with Joel when he's very young and Sarah is a newborn that was focused solely on him and I have a tiny bit on that written, perhaps that would fit your idea, perhaps I'll finish and publish one day. idk we'll see but I do promise that I will keep this in mind and think on it, and thank you for sharing your thoughts with me I really do appreciate it :)

[m318x2]

I know I haven't been active on this blog as much, I've been trying to cut back on the kinds of social media that mess with my head the most and I don't think i'll be as active here going forward. not gonna delete it and I might pop back in at some point, idk yet

also good news: I've been doing dbt for like a month and it's going really well, I can already notice things getting easier to deal with.

my parents are moving (I live with them still so I will be moving with them) which I am THRILLED about because I'm currently living in the same house my trauma happened in and that's making it very difficult to feel happy and safe at home. they put an offer in for this GORGEOUS house out near the city and if I'm being honest I feel a bit spoiled that i'll probably get to live there (idk if they accepted the offer yet but their chances are pretty good). like seriously it's not a mansion, in fact I think it's actually slightly smaller in square footage than my current house but it's laid out better and it's much more beautiful and everything's been recently updated and it's fucking GORGEOUS so. yeah I'm spoiled

I also am considering going to this tech college my brother went to (if I do it'll be after i finish the year long dbt program) and getting a two year degree in web development, possibly turning that into a bachelors in cybersecurity. i feel like I'd be good at programming/web development, and it pays VERY well from what I've read. (the tech industry is booming rn im just hoping my future coworkers are not entirely elon musk fanboys and twitter manosphere bros) and its close enough to me that I could just commute there and wouldn't have to move out of my parents house until I graduate and have the means to do so.

but idk how i'll do that with the anorexic brain fog I have rn. seriously I feel like I've dropped 30 IQ points since my ed began.

other news: I'm still not recovering from my ed, I honestly don't think i'll be able to until something terrible happens. Idk what and idk when but I just feel like nothings gonna change with my ed until it seriously fucks my life or my health up. I'm very underweight right now and very slowly but surely losing more weight. my hair is falling out. my teeth hurt. my hands and feet are getting very poor circulation. I'm cold all the time. I still don't feel sick enough. it's getting colder outside and I don't know how the fuck I'm not gonna freeze this winter, I'm literally never warm and I live in an area that can get down to like –30°F so. yeah. fuck me I'm so tired of this shit but I feel like starving has been my purpose in life for so long that idk who or where i'll be without it.

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

AAAAH WAIT IT'S THE FALL FINALE?? For some reason I did not realize that XDD Makes sense though lol

Well that's gonna be crazy lol

Ooh yeah Bobby's definitely investigating that o.o not that I expected he wouldn't but aaaahh looks like it's gonna be intense >:D

Lol xD anyway that's a bunch of short clips but it looks like it'll be wild :))

And AHHHHH a 9-1-1 Lone Star promo!!! I saw one during one of the commercial breaks earlier that had some different stuff so I'll make a separate post for the few things I caught in there with one rewatch of the one I saw during commercials as I searched up this promo to see if there was anything I was missing lol since it went so quick.

So yeah! That's the last of my last thoughts. Looks like it'll be super intense! Now time for the. . .

REVIEW

I LOOOVED this episode. I thought it was great! A dip back into the old commentary, some angst but also a bunch of laughs lol, and my lovelies being family :DD. Plus we got Joshhhh, always love to see my boy :D. And overall just some really cool calls and such!

First off, congrats(-ish? lol) to Buuuck, it finally happened lol xD :D. Took a while but we got here xD. Anyway, I'm happy for his friends :)). And I'm glad that he finally got some (good) sleep lol, after he started being unable to as well XD. Hilarious, love my boy lol <3.

Eddie! Not much to say for him, though that scene with Bobby after the fire was really great. But we DIDN'T GET THE SHOT XDDD. The cross shot from the promos!! Rude lol. Anyway, him playing video games was great, and I'm glad he finally got some sleep xD.

(Chris: . . . you didn't sleep did you

Eddie: eat your breakfast)

(wait wait wait it's like the babygirl meme - I'll make it in a second lol because I won't finish this before tgd since I wanna finish last week's tgd review lol)

Hen, plus Karen and Denny! Very important storyline, but clearly it doesn't end here. I'm glad they were so supportive of him wanting to know and stuff, it was really nice to see :). But I'm glad Hen admitted to her emotions about it <3. Like, just because they know it's about Denny doesn't mean they can't have feelings lol! But if Denny did go to visit his bio dad in secret, I'm curious as to how that'll continue 👀👀. Welp, we'll see! Anyway, THEY'RE ADORABLE AND THEY'RE FAMILY AND I LOVE THEM <333 😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰.

Also yeah Eddie openly saying "moms" got me okay 😭😭 I don't know why (that's a lie, I do, it's because it's amazing to see on tv :'D)

Poor Josh this episode xDD. I was wondering why they were looking shifty but I couldn't think of a reason (like thinking he was up to something or had a new relationship or something didn't make sense, them scheming to stop him sleeping or something didn't make sense, although it turns out they were scheming XD). I've gotta admit though it was a hilarious plotline lol, I loved it xD. Plus I just liked seeing my boy :D. Anyway, it was great xD.

Madney!!!! AHHHHH!!! They bought a house :DDDD. I mean sure, it's known as the murder house, but it's not ACTUALLY lol. Plus I'm sure that and eit cheaper :D xD. Besides the fact that it needs to much work. I'm sure we'll see the renovation process, and I'm looking forward to it!! I'm so excited and happy for them, ahhhhh (small aaaah scream not awhhh) :))) 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰. THEM <33!

Now, onto Bobby. I feel so and for him D:. I wish his friend had survived, I was really hoping he'd be able to get through whatever he was going through, but alas :'(. And I liked that conversation Athena had with him :'). It was a nice callback, and of course I love my babeys <33. Plus I just like seeing anyone being supportive of their loved ones :)). Idk, it's just nice 🥰🥰❤️. I'm VERY interested in Bobby stopping at nothing to get answers though, it seems like it'll be super intense but I great storyline 👀👀. Not that the intensity is bad! Anyway, as long as it isn't too short or isn't drawn out too long, I think it has real potential :D. Plus, it's always wild (and a privilege lol) to just see Bobby go ham xD. Batcrap, I'll say, since I don't cuss lol. It's gonna be great >:).

Overall, I really loved this episode! I thought it was great, it had a suitably creepy atmosphere, and I thought the insomnia theme was really interesting! It left space open for moments we wouldn't normally see, which I loved :D. And the calls, plus all the family feels, and some angst? Perfect episode, in my opinion /hj <3. It was just great 🥰🥰. Between all the storylines, and the little moments, it was an awesome episode.

So yeah! I enjoyed this episode so much. It had a bunch of great parts, and I don't really have any complaints. I'm excited to see where the stories go next! This has been my review of. . .

9-1-1, Season 6, Episode 9: Red Flag

What a great fall finale! I know we'll have to wait a while for the next episode, but I'm still interested in what's gonna happen next. I'm definitely invested! I'll be back here then for my review of. . .

9-1-1, Season 6, Episode 10: In A Flash

See you then!

[spaceorphan18]

I'm just needing to to talk about writing a little bit. It's going under a cut, not because of anything scandalous or remotely interesting, but because I'm using my blog as a journal and being self indulgent.

I had this somewhat possibly naively romantic idea that while I was away on what is essentially a business trip, I could use the quiet and isolation of the hotel as a place to be inspiring and use my down time to attempt to write.

There have been a few complications.

The first being that this hotel room kind of sucks. There's nothing remotely inspiring about being in it. I'm honestly beginning to miss my home. And miss my library. And I hear you - I could go look for a library or some place to /be/ that's not the hotel room, but I am so exhausted from work that I don't want to be anywhere else.

Which leads me to point two - work is exhausting. I mean, I'm opening a new store, so it's a lot of moving shit around. This evening, despite barely being able to move after I got home, after resting a while, I feel pretty awake but not really able to focus... there's still a bit of time in my day, maybe I'll do some work this evening.

But okay about the writing itself...

So, first of all, let's talk about the Bridgerton hyper fixation. I really want to talk about Penelope. Like, I wanna really dig into Penelope and her character and explore it -- but... how? I don't know what I want to write. I don't know what I want to say? Is there a fic in me? Is there meta in me? I don't know. Usually, I express my love of fictional characters through writing, and I'm feeling stuck because I don't know really how to express all of this. So I feel... gunked up.

So. there's that.

Before Bridgerton made my interests take a left turn, there was Rogue. And, honestly, that really hasn't gone anywhere. I mean, X-Men have been a fixture in my life since I was ten, so it's a part of me. And I have this really beautiful, huge story I want to write. And I've started it, and got a really good outline. But it's a matter of sitting down and working on it. Which is the hardest part.

There are actually two projects -- the first one being the huge, novel-esque fic, that I'm slightly ambitious about, but it'll be so good once I write it. But the other project are one-shots following canon. And I'm so glad that I decided to do this as one-shots. I was so inspired to write the first few. But figuring out what to do next has been a little more difficult. I'm hoping doing the meta will inspire me.

Meanwhile, there's all the Glee stuff. And, maybe hard to believe - the Bridgerton stuff has has helped me re-fall in love with Klaine a little. I miss Kurt Hummel. I do. I need to finish Head Over Feet. You guys have been waiting way too long for that, and I just need to kind of get that squared away and done with. I'm not sure what project to work on next, but everything else I have in progress is at least episodic.

Idk idk. :/

I feel like I need to really just... get my shit together. And instead, I just feel full on stuck. *sigh*

[mental-health-advice]

Hi I hope you're well. Idk who else to talk to and I haven't actually gone to a therapist yet but I know I have some sort of social anxiety because it affects my daily life. I barely participate in discussions during my classes and when I do, I overthink what I'm going to say and end up going off topic, not like how I rehearsed it in my head. I start to hate myself after I talk in class because I hate the way I speak (I'm really really bad at thinking on the spot and mumble a lot so it makes me self conscious). Sometimes the prof tells me she can't hear me and it makes me even more anxious and I feel guilty because I'm not contributing to the class well, while my classmates can contribute freely, without any worries, and are able to articulate their ideas perfectly. I feel like it'll just be a downward spiral from here because I'm only continuing my studies because my parents have high expectations for me. They think I'm capable of getting a great job because of my education and my organization skills but I get anxious just thinking about it because I know for a fact that I'd never do well in a job interview no matter how much I practice (even if I practice it still wouldn't go how I planned). They think I'm their only hope because my two elder brothers didn't finish their studies, and one also has some mental health issues (he speak to a therapist on the phone for help). I on the other hand, I know I need to go to therapy but I don't think my parents think anything is wrong with me. Plus, I feel like I'd just be a burden on them because they're already struggling as it is (we're not really that well off) and I've seen how my family treats my brother as a burden as well for having mental health issues) so I don't think I'll ever get the help I want. I also feel like a burden on my close friends because some of them also have some mental health issues and so bringing up my own struggles will make it seem as though I'm disregarding theirs. It's just too much and it's gotten to the point where I have trouble sleeping because my brain doesn't stay quiet and I have too many thoughts running through my head :(

Hey there,

I too had struggles when I was at uni with actively participating in class discussions and sharing my own thoughts and ideas on topics that were brought up, so you are definitely not alone in that aspect.

I think when it comes to speaking up and contributing to class discussions, it’s more of a confidence thing and so the more you do it, the better and more comfortable you will feel in doing it. You did mention though that you try to talk in class but that you are never satisfied or happy in the way you talk/ feeling as though you don’t get your point across well enough despite practicing and rehearsing it in your head first. Firstly, I think it’s great that you are at least giving it a go and trying, you would be surprised at how many people will just sit back in the background and stay quiet.

I am wondering if before talking in class you can first write down points that you want to talk about and next to each point writing a bit about each. Doing this may help you to stay on point and remind yourself what you are trying to discuss and get out talking wise in your classes. Just an idea! Something else you could try is speaking to your professor and letting them know that you struggling with talking in class and that it makes you feel really self-conscious when they say they cannot hear you. You never know but they may also have some pointers on how you can talk more in classes! I’m sure that they have had past students who have struggled with the same or similar things as you when it comes to speaking in class.

I also want to quickly mentioned that it’s not really fair on your parents to put all this pressure on you for being the only one out of your siblings to get into uni and continue in your studies. I too can relate to this as my eldest sister wanted to be a paramedic but didn’t get the grades to go to uni to further in her studies and my brother chose a trade and so again didn’t go to uni but then somehow, shy me got accepted? Yes it’s super cool that you got in and get to study in your chosen fields but at the same time it has to be because you want to do this, not others wanting this for you but because you want it for yourself. And whilst it’s true that you may get a better job from going to uni, you can still get a decent job of your choice without a degree. My sister is a great example of this as she never made it to uni but now has a great job at an emergency services call centre where she is able to directly help others still (just not in the field). And me, well I had to drop out of uni due to my mental health impacting on my studies but I again am doing what I love even though it’s mostly volunteer based stuff. So for example I love both working with animals and helping others and offering them support where I can. I now volunteer for an animal rescue group with getting funding and am also a foster carer for cats/ kittens and to help me fulfill my desires to help others, I volunteer when I can here at MHA. I guess what I am trying to say is that getting a degree isn’t everything. You need to be happy and really want this, even if what you really want isn’t following your parent’s dreams for you.

And in regards to feeling as though you won’t be any good at job interviews, just try to focus on the here and now right now. We never know what the future may have in store for us so there is no point in worrying or stressing about all the what ifs when they haven’t even happened as yet!

I know it can be really hard in confiding in friends about your own struggles when you know they have their own stuff going on as well. It’s more than OK to let friends into your world though and they may even be able to offer you some advice and support themselves. You will not be disregarding their own mental health stuff, actually, one thing that I have found helpful in my own mental health recovery is that sometimes it can really help to help others or even just to listen to them when times are tough or just for things in general. It can help give the other person a break from their own struggles and head and that can be really helpful at times for both you and them! And if you are worried about saying too much to your friends about your own situation, then just let them know to tell you if it’s getting to be too much. It’s OK for them to say stop, just like it’s OK for you to tell them to stop if them talking to you is becoming too overwhelming.

It can be really tough when we know we need that extra help and support but feel as though by speaking up we will be a burden to others. And whilst I do not know your family’s personal situation there are ways that you can receive the help and support and at a low cost or for free. For example, you can always speak to a counsellor from either a helpline or on web counselling which is free, or you can check out your local community mental health services and see if they can help you and support you in any way or even just referring you on to someone else. There is hope out there and yes, your parents may not be accepting that you need help and support too, but even the most successful people need help and support sometimes!

I really hope that this has helped a bit and please do let us know if we can help to support you in any other way!

I’m thinking of you and hope that you are going well!

Take care,

Lauren

[lesbianrobin]

hi em!! do you have any advice for making really elaborate gif posts with dozens of gifs? (this is what i'm thinking of) thanks <3

hii millie <3 honestly that set was So much trial and error!!! i'm going to assume you know how to actually like put multiple gifs on one canvas since you just asked for tips so i'll tell you some of the things i figured out in the process:

plan before you start and break the work into chunks!! big posts like the one you linked can be daunting, and having a plan can make the process more manageable. when i made the linked gifset, i completed one color at a time and finished that color before moving on to the next rather than jumping around, so i was able to clearly see my progress as i giffed. it was really exciting whenever i finished a gif and added it to my drafts post and i knew that i was Exactly 40% done or whatever yknow?

err on the side of shorter rather than longer. when you put a lot of gifs together, not only will it make a pretty big file, it can also be a little bit busy!! if you keep your gifs short, you'll do yourself a favor in terms of file size And it'll make the overall gifset easier to appreciate because like. people don't wanna sit around watching dozens of gifs that take a long time to loop. if you keep the length fairly short the gifs will load more easily and people can see Everything fairly quickly.

assemble your gifs before you do your coloring/brightening/etc! idk if this is just a problem with my laptop or photoshop or what but when i move a gif from one file to another, my adjustment layers and layer masks often get screwed up, so there's no reason to screw around with adjustments before getting my gifs arranged how i like them.

don't limit yourself to familiar layouts!! combining multiple gifs on one canvas can let you mix gif sizes or use unconventional shapes!

i would encourage you to figure out at least a general color palette and layout before you start to guide you, but to not hold yourself to it if something else happens along the way. if you're going to put a lot of work into a set, you ought to like the final product!! if you planned to do one thing and end up doing another, don't force yourself to follow the original plan. this is a hobby and it's supposed to be fun <3

the last big tip i have is to ummmmm make sure you like. check over everything before you post it. i made SO many mistakes in that rainbow post skncdkms especially in the white and pink gifs you can see like my color adjustments sometimes will just disappear from a certain gif for a frame or two. i was so excited to post and tired of photoshop when i finally finished that i didn't double-check things and now i just have these embarrassing mistakes out there with five thousand notes.

anyway i guess that's it??? ty for asking!! if you want more specific advice about like actual photoshop functions i am probably not the best person to ask but let me know and i'll help however i can <3

[innerworldcore]

Hello hello, it's me who previously asked that i wanted to share my headspace in my next ask :D (this will look like a tour pffffft) and i'm sorry for any grammatical mistakes :(

SOOOOO, first thing first gotta admit i'm not a system and the people that lived in there are my headspace friends (not alters). Headspace is my place to hang out with them when i'm bored or feeling lonely, or maybe when i'm scared even. It's created like years ago and it's a really fun place (if i got anxiety breakdown or maybe a psychotic episode that's an exception tho)

Anyway it's heavily based on pixar's inside out but as time goes on i changed some of the features on it. In headquarter there's another room which is my room (left), then in the middle there's a mattress for my friends to sleep in (also where the emotions collecting the memories and stuff yknow?), then the terrace is in the right. Right in front of the main door there's a ladder (this hq isn't as far from the ground like in the movie)

Below hq was a really big cliff/canyon, now it's pretty much a super deep lake cause there's an apocalypse happening in here and when i went back the water's already full lol. What's interesting tho was the water, it's black cause it's mixed with old memories that'd be forgotten. Totally not a safe place to swim :0

And thennnn there's my library of memories! It's like a- well library lol, it's another thing that i changed from the source tho. The shelves are woods and there are pretty vines decorating it! The memories tho aren't well organized lmao, also their shape is an orb like in the movie but i wanna change it into fireflies in a jar but idk yet, maybe a tiny orb in a jar, when i open it it'll be like a projection or sum

Then you keep going through the library then you'll find a tree house! Like REALLY big tree house. That's where the mind workers and some of my other friends lived in!

And you might find this extra space while exploring the library tho, i'm not really sure where it was located cause either if i go left or right i'd find it in less than 30 seconds (my mind's making it easier to find lol). Thing is it's a pretty cool place to chill out or having a break from the walk. The floor isn't like in library (pale cream/pink? Ground like in the movie), it's tiled with white small stones and in the middle of it there's a fountain. It's been here since the early days i made this place, i have no idea why it exist cause it's seriously not from the source and why even the heck i still remember it?

Ohhhh i forgot to add, there's this "restricted area" that exist not far from the library, means it's also near hq and the lake. It's restricted because it's full of triggering memories from my trauma, idk why it's collected in there but yeah. That's also where "it" lived, a being that idk WHEN i'll be able to get rid off and is very dangerous. It's trying to manipulate, gaslight, and shit talking me like thouuuuuusand times and it's seriously annoying!

Anyway from the outside it looks like a crack that made a hole, i made a slide so i wouldn't have to fall but in the end of it, it's all looking rusty, abandoned and old. In the bottom it looks like a cave with 4 or 5 doors in both left middle and right sides, in each doors there's a lamp above it, and the floor isn't the same as the ground outside it's pitch black. This place is also flooding a little, which make it more uncomfortable to walk in. I'd never wanted to go in there anymore :/

after i read some of your posts i realized that my inner world is so small compared to those who had forests, field, or hotel looking world haha. i wanna add these stuff tho, but i gotta think on WHERE do i wanna put it so i don't get lost too much in here. i'll give you more update when it's finished (if i'm confused i'll ask some stuff here though hehe)

have a great day/night <3

That's super cool! I've actually heard a lot about people with the HQ from inside out in their innerworlds, seems to be a common theme! Also, it's alright to have a small innerworld! If it's easier to navigate and you don't need/ want anything else then it's perfect! Of course, you will probably keep expanding upon it and changing things as your wants and needs change.

From what I have heard, your innerworld sounds and looks (from what I imagined) amazing! I wish you the best of luck expanding it and look forward to more updates! I hope you also have a great rest of your day! Bye !!

Our Requests, Asks, and Submits are Open!!

[mobiused]

mobi have u ever watched battle royale? who do you think would win if it were between loonaverse loona

What the actual eff I literally just turned on Battle Royale (its one of my fav films to watch when I'm sick) that's scary.

In loonaverse i feel like it would be an odd eye circle member but actually i love this ask so let me go into excessive detail (and for game balance i'm nerfing all their superpowers) Oh whoops its too long

Heejin i feel would be ok but i worry that she's like... too rebellious kinda feel like she would get blown up like Nobu kinda. Alternatively she would be a good leader and get backstabbed toward the latter half of the game.

While irl hyunjin alleges she would thrive on a deserted island, I'm pretty sure both irl and loonaverse hyunjin would kinda hardcore crumple from the pressure like go borderline catatonic... She'd get by if someone like Heejin was around to pick up her slack but the people who can smell weakness would get her kinda early i think

Haseul ... erm normal haseul has team player vibes and like heejin would get far in a group but would get backstabbed or sacrifice herself for the sake of others... Like i can imagine a lot of crying but i think she'd pull it together? but like... her boy version...! She's got an itchy trigger finger!! Maybe her impulsivity/emotionality would make her switch up and make her quite dangerous idk

Loonaverse yeojin gives me rue vibes like her whole deal is being lost in the forest. She'd make it to the end by just hardcore camping or somethinggg queen. But i doubt she'd be able to finish anyone off (yeoseul angst if haseul & yeojin made it to the end haseul by becoming a corrupt murderer and yeojin by hiding and yeojin horrified at what her big sister figure became... am i sick for that. sorry.)

IRL vivi would be my pick because she has the streetsmarts she has the self-preservation instinct she has the love of gory horror and zombie films. But loonaverse vivi... idk maybe? We don't really know much about her except that she's timid in romantic affairs so I kinda assume she's timid in other regards too... so idk outlook not so good i fear

Kim Lip is probably my biggest pick because she comes across as incredibly levelheaded and mission oriented. Like she's gonna get the job done, begrudgingly probably, but it'll still be done.

Jinsoul is given like aggressive vibes by virtue of being a blue betta / siamese fighter fish but we don't really see much of that. So... she has the aggression but does she have the strats? The self discipline?Maybe idk

Choerry it's like. She's been through a lot I think she has the type of personality that would harden up and deal with everything she's given like she'd step up to the plate. And while IRL choerry has a little dark side to her, choerry's whole thing is that she's the Hero and white symbolising Goodness etc etc so like maybe she wins by virtue of being protag like Shuya?

Yves is like... she's good at manipulation but totally all bark no bite. If/when one of her subordinates reach their limit and snap, then there's no hope...

Chuu would be Yves' good lapdog right? But she's like a sappy romantic so I feel like her outcome would be dependant on whatever Yves ends up doing. But getting major murder seweycide vibes

Gowon would play similarly to Yeojin i think like her main strat is hiding and avoiding conflict... but when it comes to crunch time i think she'd slay. literally. Since her post-enlightenment character is barely fleshed out, I'll take inspiration from Aron of East of Eden fame and say she hypothetically could be a good fighter like in a "And when Aron cried and fought at the same time he was dangerous." way, but equally since she's Aron, being put in such a situation could break her and make her totally despondent and unhinged

Olivia Hye is a crybaby sorry and again all bark no bite like. OK like if it was Olivia at the start of her story then I think she would be too angry to do a good job like... U need a clear head and she does not have one. But later on like in So What or even by Hi High we can see that she's managing to rechannel her anger into a (slightly?) more productive manner? Still I think she's too emotional to do a good job like i don't think she could even bring herself to finish anyone off.

Um so yea thats my roundup. My most likely candidates for winners are Choerry, Lip and Haseul i guess?

[milkybonya]

Hi Milky!! I hope you had a nice day today 🥰 I'm graduating in just a few hours! I can't believe it 😭😭 me?? A college graduate?? Sounds fake 😭 but it sounds extra fake because I'm taking an extra year to pursue a certificate so I'll be at the same school taking undergraduate classes with kids 2-3 years younger than me 😭 But idk I'm really excited because my mom is coming to see me today for graduation 🥰 I missed her a lot! I've been making origami for her as stress relief and I'm going to be giving it to her today! I'm not the artistic child in the family so I'm sure it'll mean a lot that I tried for her.

Things have been going really well recently by the way! Finishing up classes and resting for the last few days has been nice. I still have to do work for my internship/second job idk what to call it lol but it's been low maintenance and I can do the work when I want (it's remote!). I'm sure things will pick up on Monday when I start classes but I've been practicing a lot of self care that I hope will carry forward into the summer! Even though I've had a lot going on, my mood has been fantastic. Writing to Kingdom I think has helped a lot. They are all so nice 🥺 Seeing them cheer my posts on Weverse occasionally really goes a long way. Even tho not much has changed since March when I was really going through it, I'm doing much better so idk we love that 🥰

I hope things are going well for you in Korea! Astro on the 28th ahhh have fun!! I don't follow Astro but they seem like very sweet and talented boys so I'm sure it'll be a great experience 🥰🤩 and studying at the YG Cafe?? Hello that sounds so cool! I can't believe you saw a flash of Yoshi 🥺 I can't imagine just hanging out where idols might be coming and going! If you're willing to share, I'd love to hear your favorite part about being in Korea! I'm sure it's hard to choose just one, but if you wanna tell me about a couple, I'd love to hear 🥰

And I just saw your post about writing a blurb for moots' birthdays. You're so sweet 😭🥺 My ult is Baekhyun but idk I feel like I'd rather read for Arthur 🥺 He's climbing up my ult chart very quickly. My birthday is March 21 :) so it's just a little far away lol I haven't been on Tumblr a lot recently (but I have your post notifs on so I always come check when I see you're posting) but I need to continue reading your Treasure drabbles. The ones I read were so cute 🥺🥺 You have such a sweet writing style. It always makes me so happy.

And I'm glad you laughed at my delulu edit LOL everytime I would look at it I started dying laughing. Like I'm so embarrassed I actually made that but I actually did such a good job?? Considering I have like no experience with photo ending I'm happy lol I actually sent it to Arthur on the fancafe a couple days ago 😭 They aren't active on there anymore but they still check the posts so he didn't comment on it but I can only imagine he is laughing at me. As he should tho, it was so silly lol

I hope you have a nice weekend! 💙

omg graduating in a few hours?! you must be graduated by now then, congratulations my love!!! ♡ i'm so proud of you, you did so well... ♡ and hey, even if you're going back to school after and with kids younger than you, that's okay! age is not important, but doing things you love is !

i hope you had a lovely time and with your mom too 💟 i hope she loved the origami!! i didn't know you can do origami :O that's so cool! what kinds of things do you make ?!

i'm so happy you've been getting rest ^^ i hope you're able to keep up the self care ! and that your internship and new classes go well :O you're doing so much omg i'm insanely proud! and so glad to hear things are well :") to be doing better despite things remaining the same is honestly so powerful ❣️

yes omg astro this weekend.. they dropped their new album too and i love it a lot >_< especially my bias, Jinjin, his solo !

i actually... fully saw ikon coming out of their cars and going into the building it was so insane ! seriously being there near where treasure and other yg artists are gives me so much energy T-T

omg my favourite part of korea?? it definitely is hard to choose but i think it's in the small things?? like how good the public transit is, how well-mannered and polite everyone is, the fact that cute cafés are everywhere, the food!! i don't really enjoy cooking so being able to eat out healthily for cheap is such a blessing T-T and omg the convenience stores !!! i love that there's a river near my house, too.. i go for runs there a lot ! oops i listed so many things T-T

i'll be adding your birthday--!!

i can't believe you have my post notifs on aHH you're so sweet i'll cry,,, 😭

seriously your edit made me die for a good 5 minutes hehe so i can only imagine Arthur must've died too!! i'm so glad you sent it to him but it's a shame they aren't so active :( it would be funny to see what he says !

i hope you have a lovely week up ahead 💟

[bluejayblueskies]

for the WIP game: i am intrigued by "untitled_1" - it's like a randomizer button! you have no idea what's waiting for you on the other side :o

untitled_1 is one of the wips i have that i'm not sure if i'll ever publish (tbh i am so bad at picking up old wips and actually finishing them). it's the fic i work on periodically when i'm feeling particularly awful, and the basic premise of it is that jon is doing very poorly somewhere else but is struggling to get help for a variety of reasons. reading back over it now, it's not something i would necessarily mind publishing, but idk if it'll ever reach any sort of satisfactory conclusion because it's, in essence, a vent fic. maybe if i feel particularly inspired? but for the foreseeable future, it will remain untitled_1 haha

here's an excerpt:

For some reason, looking at the crack in his phone still made him want to cry. But that wasn’t an altogether unusual feeling as of late, so he ignored it and set the phone face-down on the bed and went to brush his teeth.

(If something were really wrong, he wouldn’t be able to muster the energy to do that—right? That’s what all the literature says, anyway. Jon’s been reading a lot of it lately, just to prove to himself that he’s fine.)