#i. love him. so mUCH

[aka-indulgence]

Worth the Effort (You Are)

As I’ve said before, I’ve been in a Really Romantic mood lately, and I just wanna…. be with Sans….. ouhghug….. i lov him….. also I just so happen to have written and finished this around valentines day! It’s not a valentine’s fic but. It’s very soft… romantic fluff… hehehee ://>

Ao3 (because it is Longe): https://archiveofourown.org/works/45076489

———————

It was an exciting day.

You tie a white sash around your waist, and tie your hair back. Styling your hair?

The baby blue dress you were wearing was adorable. It was really flattering for your form, and you look like if a flower had spontaneously turned into a human.

A special day.

Sans had asked you on a date. One that he planned out, one that he said was like “what you’d expect from a romance movie. novel. mettaton’s dating ma- no maybe not that one.”

Any date with Sans was a special occasion. Time spent with your wonderful, loving bonefriend was something you cherished. But Sans was putting effort to change things up, to impress you with something new. Not that you needed it, but the fact that he was doing it for you makes your heart flutter.

He said he wouldn’t even teleport for it, that he’d have a special ride for you. You don’t know what he could mean by that… usually you’d assume him to be alluding to teleporting (the first time he’d say that line was when he showed you his teleportation powers. Your jaw had dropped on the floor that first time.), but he already said he wasn’t. You spend your time nervously waiting for him to arrive pondering what kind of ‘ride’ he’s bringing. Of course, Sans never showed interest in vehicles… why would he, if he already has the most efficient method of transfer already, what… ingrained in his very soul? Maybe he borrowed Papyrus’ car? Or… maybe he is planning to surprise you with a car…?

You doubt it. Sans is crafty as much as he is lazy. He strives for convenience.

You don’t doubt however, that Sans was going to be on time. He promised that he’s going to arrive today on time. So you relax on the window-side seat, not looking out of it, as if he was going to come faster if you did, no. You actually relax a bit, not paying attention to the time, and start to snooze a little… woken up by the knocks on your door. You practically bounce off the seat like a spring, opening the door with a smile on your face that somehow gets wider when you see the soft skull of the man you loved so much.

Even better, he was wearing a tux shirt, and long jeans. Sans, mixing up his wardrobe? No.

“Sans!” You waste no time to wrap your arms around him (well, to the best of your ability) in a warm hug.

Look at your handsome man!!!

“are you surprised? i promised,” Sans winks. Sure enough, you fish out your phone and it shows you the lock screen.

“On time, to the dot!” You announce excitedly.

Sans snickers a little. “if you were looking at a clock…”

… “Don’t tell me you knocked right when the second hand made it all click.”

“yes.”

You laugh delightedly at that, wishing you were looking at an analog clock to see that, it would’ve been amazing.

“Well, I say I’m impressed, but… you’ve always been good at being ‘on time’,” You say slyly, as if you were trying to undermine his feat. Sans can see in your smile that you weren’t doing it to be mean. “You’ve been pretty good at keeping your promises to come on time.”

He was on time, sure… but he’d like to cut it close. If this was another date, Sans would come to you just a few seconds before the time he promised he’d take you out somewhere- say, a restaurant, and appear before a very shaken receptionist and tell them about his reservation (that was about to be cancelled).

“you know me. i hate promises, i don’t make them lightly.” Sans makes a solemn expression. “but i always make promises to you. you make it easy for me to keep them.”

… Damn this man, your heart was feeling all sorts of mushy and soft for him before the date’s even gotten off the ground properly.

Sans can’t blame you for having to immediately kiss him (right now!!). In fact, the skeleton seems quite happy to have you furiously kissing him on the teeth.

“You look!! So good!” You say as soon as you’re done attacking him, picking at his shirt. “tux shirt. Simple, but dapper.”

You’re only half-joking.

“ah… you as well,” Sans’ smile turns warmer, seeing your dress.

Of course Sans would appreciate your clothes, but you still feel giddy anyway, giving him a little twirl. “You like it?”

“i love it.” Sans tells you emphatically. “it’s cute… an’ pretty. you trying to match my magic?”

“Absolutely.” You answer confidently, pecking him one more time on the cheekbone, which he rubs affectionately, chuckling.

“Well!” You clap your hands, challenge in your tone. “Where’s this ride you’ve been promising me? It better live up to the hype!”

Sans chuckles at your enthusiasm, then steps back away from the door and makes a grand waving motion at the thing just on the road in front of your home.

“our ride, my lady.” He bows dramatically.

You’re… actually too stunned to speak. The blue ride Sans was showing you was… a tricycle. An honest to god tricycle.

“H… h,” you wheeze gently, “you didn’t,” you breathe as you approach the (relatively) little thing.

“i did.”

When you look it over, you could see that it was modified. It was larger than a little kiddy tricycle, but not as big as a proper bicycle. The seat was so that it could fit two people comfortably (and you mean comfortably. Sans wasn’t… a small man). Other than that it looked like a regular tricycle.

When you turn to look at Sans, he looks so proud.

“What a–” cute “--silly use of your engineering degree. I love it.”

“no core, a bore,” Sans shrugs, as if that little detail in his credentials was some everyday thing that many monsters had. “well… not really. but it’s been a while since i really… used that degree for anything. might as well for my favorite human, huh?”

You don’t doubt that your eyes were sparkling at him when he says that. You spend a minute or so just admiring the tricycle.

“Did you build it from scratch or…?”

“nah. that’d be tire-ing.” Sans sighs, “I’d rather tri something else.”

“L-”

“like we should get a move on before it gets too late. we better get this show on the road before we spend an entire day lazing around your house.”

“... Who are you and what did you do to Sans?”

“heheheh,”

As much as you’d like to tease him about it, he’s right. Sans prepared… “Stuff” for you, and you’d like to appreciate it.

So you do.

“Let’s go then, Mr. chauffeur, take me to our destination!” You declare confidently, glance at the tricycle, then less confidently “.... can you tell me how to sit in this?”

—————

You don’t think you’ve ever felt so nervous riding a tricycle before.

You’re sat behind Sans, and though you’re about the same height as him, his broad shoulders made it so it was a bit hard to look over them. Your hands couldn’t circle him properly, so you had your hands scrunching up his shirt. It didn’t take too long before you got used to it though, and your brain didn’t keep thinking that you’d fall out of the generous seat.

You would think that riding a tricycle around the city, it would take a while to get anywhere, but surprisingly, Sans kept up good speed. He even overtakes a couple of cars while he pedaled, and even from behind him you could see the shit-eating grin growing on his face whenever someone in the cars makes a double take at the sight. You’d covered your mouth then, a move that made Sans even more proud.

You wondered how he did it. And how Sans didn’t seem to struggle at all. Leg day, maybe?

The idea of Sans doing any sort of exercise seriously, perhaps even specifically so he could use the tricycle was a hilarious mental image.

By the time you’ve arrived, you barely recognize your surroundings. You’re at a nice big park… somewhere? And after Sans parks the trike,

(“don’t worry, no one’s going to steal a tricycle. that’s a bit trite don’t you think?” “I mean. If you say no one’s going to nab it…”)

(Sans somehow fits the tricycle into the regular bicycle parking rack.)

He brings you up to a scenic hill that looks like it came out straight out of a movie. Overlooking the rest of the park, with a big shady tree on it.

It’s a good thing you came earlier, because today was the perfect weather to be out, and no one had taken the prime space yet. The sun’s getting high on the sky, but you won’t be bothered under the shade.

He leads you there, then takes his hand away. “wait here. be right back in a jiff,” Sans mentions, and he walks behind the tree. He takes more than a jiff, a couple of seconds, and when he reemerges from the other side you stifle a snort.

He looks like a whirlwind, a plaid red and white blanket thrown over his skull, and a picnic basket swinging from one hand…

A picnic!!

Old memories resurface, of always wanting to do a traditional picnic that you saw often while watching shows and movies as a kid. With a blanket and matching picnic basket… tea cup set… lovely company. You never got to and you didn’t think you’d have the motivation, but here you were, with Sans providing it for you.

“A picturesque picnic?” You thought out loud, “That’s so sweet!”

“hey you haven’t even seen what’s inside the basket.” Sans places it down, and spreads the blanket over the grass. “and i mean… paps helped me pick out the stuff, so i think he should get some of the credit.”

“Credit for what?”

“getting good grades on ‘dating’,”

“Am I dating the both of you???”

“no it’s an individual project… but doesn’t hurt to have a brother who reads all about dating.”

The basket Sans brought wasn’t small by all accounts, but Sans fitted more into it than you thought it could. You take them out and spread them over the blanket. You squeed in delight, having some of your favorite light dishes around you, along with the picnic staples: sandwiches, fruits, and of course one (1) teapot.

As you look around though, you have to ask… “Are you sure you like this stuff, Sans?”

Sans pauses, hand stuck in the basket. “huh? of course i do. i wouldn’t bring it if i didn’t. besides,” He materializes a hotdog from the basket, “i came prepared with my usual.”

It was a sight, to have him bring out the ketchup bottle out and sblort, there goes the ketchup on the sausage, against the backdrop of a very proper looking picnic.

Well… almost. Wasn’t like your favorites didn’t include something ‘unhealthy and greasy’...

“had to sneak this in. i’d already promised paps that i was gonna plan out a romantic picnic and he left me to it for the most part… but he wouldn’t have approved of this particular meal choice.”

“No, he wouldn’t.” You agreed, eyeing his hotdog with a little more drool than you’d care to admit. “Do you have… more…?”

“wouldn’t be a thoughtful boyfriend if i didn’t think about that now, would i?” Sans’ sockets gleam as he procures another delicious processed meat product.

You spend your picnic appreciating all the stuff Sans brought (doing your best not to shove it all down your face), pleasantly surprised that Sans made most of it by hand.

“also, papyrus was there. … i promise, i made the main stuff, even if paps tried to stage a coup against me,”

“Hahaha!”

It was very thoughtful, and it made you feel very special that this skeleton with a lazybones reputation kept proving to you day by day that you were someone worth a lot of effort, even if you didn’t need something grand.

Eventually the topic of his tricycle came up again.

“i’ve had that tricycle for a while, actually. ever since we surfaced,”

“No way, really?” you looked back towards the bike parking area, though you couldn’t actually see the vehicle in question. “I was convinced you bought and built that tricycle for this date.”

You’re afraid you might’ve sounded disappointed, because Sans waves his hands frantically. “no no, that was for you. it wasn’t all… professionally approved for actual distance travel, before. i did that for this,” he gestures at the picnic. “no… it used to be a very normal tricycle. and no, not the one for adults. lil kiddy trike.”

You think about the tricycle now, upsized and fit for two people. You try to imagine what it might’ve looked like back then, while Sans stayed the same… on a kiddy tricycle…

Your mouth turns into a squiggly line. “B… but why? I’ve… I’ve never even seen you on something remotely like a bike,”

“i can show you,” Sans fishes his phone out of his pocket, smile going up to his sockets. “you wanna know how big ‘ol me fit on it, right?”

“Yes!” you answer emphatically as Sans scrolls through his gallery. It takes him a while before his sockets widen in an a-ha! expression.

“here it is… sweet surfacing memories,” Sans says, turning the screen to you as he looks up wistfully to the sky.

Your face is flat as you stare at the image on the phone, hands unconsciously coming up to it, taking it away from Sans. You just had to take a closer look.

It was… a glorious picture. The image quality was surprisingly crisp and sharp where it mattered, considering the motion blur you could see at the edges of it. There, was an image of Sans, his shit-eating grin wide on his face as he winks for the camera, and though it was cut off you could see how tiny the tricycle looked like under him, And behind, there was Papyrus, in his sports car, all shiny and new with the hood down and Papyrus was… god, his eyes were popping out of his skull, mouth opened in frozen agony, fists furious at the wheel. You honestly think you could hear the “SAAAAANS!!!” he must undoubtedly be screeching in the image.

Sans laughs along with you when you burst, throwing your head back, one hand to your chest- he was trying to kill you!- half-mindedly handing him back his phone.

Again, “B… but why!?” You ask even more desperately than before.

“screwing with my younger brother, obviously.” He rolls his eyelights in teasing ‘duh’. “pap always wanted to have a sports car like that, you already knew he used to have a racecar bed back in the underground. early after we surfaced, pap got his dream come true in that car and wanted to take a test… victory ride around the city highways. i gave him some time to indulge on it himself but.. i couldn’t resist to ruin it… maybe just a little,”

There was the glint in his sockets, in the way his grin was lifted, the expression that Sans had when he just found a brand new pun or when he was waiting for you to realize what he just tricked you into. Even though you’ve fallen for something many a time when he did it, he always looked adorable when he made that face- happy.

“couldn’t let my brother have his joy ride on his own could i? so i found my own- shortcutted all around the city for bicycle stores… toy stores… for the perfect tricycle. i needed something that was practical but still funny enough, something that’d look small for me, and i found it. as soon as i did i chased him, and once i found him, i overtook him.”

His sockets crinkled as he looks to the side, no doubt looking at the memory in his mind’s eye. “he was so pissed. you know my brother, so cool, he was stamping his leg and flailing his hands while the car kept cruisin’ on as if he was still driving it. i rode off into the sunset before he did, and when i got home he’d stopped at undyne’s house, sitting on the porch, looking like a storm. undyne was trying to comfort him but… i think i even got her, because she broke out into a laugh when she saw my trike.”

He sighs happily. “told her i was here to pick up my bro. paps left in a huff and said I CAN TAKE MYSELF HOME ALONE!!”

You laugh- surprised and not at the same time, and you don’t bother trying to keep it ‘polite’. You weren’t expecting the frighteningly good impression of his brother form Sans, and the story itself was hilarious- something you absolutely expected from Sans.

“You’re an asshole!” You say, pointing an accusatory finger at him. Sans doesn’t take offense.

“sure was. pap tried real hard to stay mad at first, for ruining his moment… but i apologized to him while sitting on my trike. i don’t think he could resist seeing something like that. i broke him when i honked the horn.”

“There was a horn?!” You repeat, disbelieving.

“yeah.

“Where’d it go?

“oh, i took it off, for the… for the occasion.” Sans rubs the back of his neck. “didn’t feel like it’d fit..?”

Hm… probably right.

But, “You should put it back on after!” you encourage, “I wanna ride around in it with you more! And I think the faces people make when you honk at them are going to be funnier after they get over their shock.”

Sans perks up at that, like he wasn’t expecting it. “r… really?” then, hesitantly, “you… you actually like that thing?”

“Of course I do, you made it for us!” You announce cheerfully. “And I really want to ride around the city with you… it was actually pretty relaxing.”

Of course you liked being with Sans anywhere, and his teleportation was great you could go from one place to another in an instant without having to worry if you’d ever be late, but… you also liked taking your time to just be around him, and since Sans rarely ever took rides… it was pretty romantic to be riding behind him while he cycled around.

You add that. “And I like spending time with you,”

His grin was minimal now, something that’d worry you… if his cheeks hadn’t started dusting blue, spreading across his face.

“i…. same,” He eventually smiles again, holding his cheek tenderly. “i love you.”

“I love you too.” You answered so fast it was almost automatic.

Sans sits there in silent for a moment, the sound leaves rustling quietly in the wind, along with the ambient noise of the park. Then, he seems to get an idea.

“you know what else you love though...”

Oh no. That grin wasn’t a good sign.

(It was a Funny sign.)

“you love food so much you’ve been stealing it from your own datemate.” He puts his hand on his sternum and makes a melodramatic face. “i’m hurt.”

“What..?”

When you turn to look, all the leftovers have somehow been piled onto your plate in the blink of an eye. You’re surprised it doesn’t topple.

“Wh, how did that all get here?!”

“i get eating condiments with excitement, i really do, you know me, but… that whipped cream was for sharing, sweet-toots.”

“Huh???” Was your reaction, until you saw the whipped cream beside you. “I was!! Putting it on the cake earlier!!”

“ravenous.” Sans is ignoring your desperate pleas! “you can still see the remnants of the crime…” He’s tapping on the side of his teeth. Sure enough, you had whipped cream there.

“And you have the crime of breaking the laws of physics!” You shoot back, ‘walking’ towards him on your knees, “time to go to jail, bone man!”

“oh no, are you going to whip me- augh!!” Was Sans’ anguished cry (mixed in with a surprised laugh) when you smack him softly on the cheek, trying to jab him anywhere you can. You were (not actually) annoyed and you were trying to make your case clear! Sans answers back with jabs on his own, and though he had thick bones and bigger hands, he was… playing as nice as one Sans would allow. Then, he found his way to his tickle spots.

“Sans, no!”

You end up playfully stuck to each other, trying to shove and tickle and push and pull at each other, to get the upper hand.

“Get your hands-! Not there!”

“if you surrender first, food stealer,”

“For the last time I did not steal your food!!”

“whipped cream sprayer,”

“I didn’t-! Argh!!”

You give Sans a hard shove. And this time he doesn’t get up- you see him attempt, of course, but he starts tilting back over the hill, you can see his expression turn from playful to huh?? And you try to catch him, one hand going over to protect his skull and the other around his waist (sort of), but he’s tilted too far… and his hands had automatically caught you…

Well. You end up rolling down the hill together, a blur of blue and black, picnic left alone on top. You squeaked and Sans was huffing as you both spinned, eventually slowing down to a halt, with you on top of Sans.

You were in a tangle of limbs. Apparently both of you had the same idea- keep the other one safe. Although you can’t imagine your tiny hands could be of much help to Sans, who’s thick arms did wonderful as a defensive pillow around you.

You stare at each other in stunned-silence for a little while. Maybe a bit longer.

You only seemed to snap out of it when you saw a blade of grass on Sans’ cheek and tried to thumb it away- only to realize your hand was stuck under Sans skull. And when you tried to use the other one, it was also stuck under Sans’ back.

Your face scrunched up and so did Sans. And then you both burst out in laughter, ignoring your trapped hands.

“r…. ribcaged!!” Sans was wheezing, the power of his laughter making you shake a little on top of him, while your own laughing certainly made you look like you were vibrating.

“I was trying to keep your skull safe and this is the thanks I get?” You’d jab him in the sternum if you could, but alas, your hands were indeed, ribcaged.

Sans mirrors you, putting one hand on your head, lifting his back a little so you could free your hands (before they start falling asleep). You fold them on top of him, smiling while he’s still giggling, his sockets shut.

“oh my god,” Sans says, like he’s had a revelation, rubbing one phalange under his socket. “are we… are we in a romcom? or… straight up romantic movie?”

He was hehehehing all the way, and you really didn’t want him to stop.

“What if we are?” You shrug. “We’ve got real attractive leaads…”

“heheheh… yeah we do,”

Sans draws his hands back around you while you giggle, and when his hand settles over your head, you struggle a little to stop yourself from smiling when he leans in. You meet his teeth with your lips, and it was a joy to feel that he was having trouble too, feeling his expression on his teeth.

You’re so happy. You’re so happy you get to do silly, adorable couple stuff with someone that you really cared about.

… Somewhere deep in your mind, you think “We’re lucky Alphys and Undyne aren’t around to see this… they’d be taking pictures like paparazzi, and you’re sure they’d squee about it with each other.”

—————

You spent some time canoodling with Sans a bit longer, until you both abruptly remembered your picnic stuff when a dog had come up, sniffing around. Most of it have been eaten of course, so nothing got sacrificed… but you supposed it was time for you retire home. It was afternoon now and families have started getting to the park, which was less peaceful. Nice, but not quiet.

“i mean it would be nice to see the sunset… but i don’t think you’d have much fun overheating under the sun.” Sans said, on the matter while he stacked the utensils back into the basket. (He had insisted he do the stacking. By the way he put emphasis on it, you feel like it’s either a pun, or a story he hadn’t told you about.)

When you came back to the parked tricycle, he looked like he’s still feeling shy about it and had half a mind to just teleport you home, but you remind him how much you want to ride around with him, and he concedes.

“You should take me sunset riding. Next time maybe?” You talked over him, hair waving in the wind. He had gone up a flyover and you were admiring the view, the tall buildings all around you. Maybe he didn’t think you could see it, but you could see the blue spreading on his face again. It took him a while before he answered you with “yes. definitely, next time…”

It felt like the ride home was all too fast, and you had the same feeling in your stomach as you do when you were a kid, waking up right before your car arrives home. It doesn’t keep you down though, as you practically skip your way towards home, with Sans holding onto your arm like a proper gentleman.

You take off your shoes at the door and untie your sash, standing around the entry way. “Aw Sans, that was great! Food’s good, cool ride,” Sans ducks his skull a bit, glancing away, “even better skeleton. It…. it was a special date. Thanks Sans,”

You give him a peck on the cheek, and you love seeing the little gesture has him being faintly blue, though he has a confident smile and his eyelights were glowing brightly.

“it’s… don’t mention it. i told you i gotta romantic bone in me…”

“I knew that!” You giggled, reminding him that “It’s Papyrus that didn’t think you had a romantic bone!”

You shake your head. “But look at you now… you put together a bunch of meals for us, bought matching basket and blanket, got here on time, and you modified an entire tricycle that you only planned to use as a joke.”

Your heart feels full as you say, “You always know how to make me feel special.”

His grin drops again, averting his gaze. This scene… it makes you smile, how even after a year of dating this goober, it still feels as if you two were two kids who’s crushing on each other. He takes your hands in his, and when his eyelights turn to look back at you, you could see they were in the shape of hearts.

“you’re always worth the effort, starlight.”

Ah… that lovely nickname.

He brings your hands to his teeth in a gentleman kiss. You’re squeeing and shaking in place, you don’t want to let go of Sans’ hands right now.

“Oh, I can’t wait to be able to have revenge on you, grr… who would’ve guessed the whoopie cushion would be so good at romance?”

Sans taps his chin, looking around your house as if he were judging it. “hm…. i can think of a few ways you could repay me.” Sans says, after much pondering. “ya know my legs are real tired from all that pedaling… i don’t think i have enough strength to go home right now…”

You smile at him. You’re too happy to try to challenge his reasoning- even to jokingly ask him “but you can teleport?”

As if he was expecting you to turn him away however, Sans has chosen to close the distance and dramatically lay (part) of his weight on you.

“Wh- hey! Get off!! Sans you can stay, but I’m not going to have a lot of fun if you end up crushing me on my front door!”

“.....” Sans doesn’t answer. Instead,

“zzzzzz……”

“Oh my god!”

You get into ‘Playful Fight Round Two’, but it doesn’t last as long, and there were no scenic romantic hills to roll over, as you settled into Sans’ arms, walking over to the very comfy sofa that could very well rival his old one back at his house.

“this is the best repayment ever, and you’re the best girlfriend ever,” Sans says. You both settle into a couch cuddle, with Sans as the big spoon, TV turned on as background noise. “happy anniversary, starlight.”

He kisses your cheek. The edges of your lips quirk up. Though they were getting tired from how much you smiled today, you don’t have it in you to care.

“Happy anniversary, Sans.”

[honeysucklethornsandalligtrhorns]

okay FINE i’ll share the nasir amin art i made earlier today.

i love him very very much. two different shots bc i added some stuff + did some shading

[kavaleyre]

• The Hanged Man •

“Compared to what Falin went through? This is nothing.”

[cryptocism]

It would have taken another immortal to keep up with him.

so i haven't read the books but i did read the Devil's Minion chapter and this part made me laugh out loud:

[ingravinoveritas]

"We've all got to be fighting that fight every day."

Happy Pride, everyone...

[hollis-art]

ngl im not even a superman fan. i just REALLY like clark kent,,, (thank you, Smallville, for that.)

[thebeloathed]

I love flirty Stan that becomes a flustered mess the second it's reciprocated

[beesleeps]

[whitealbum]

[taakiitoo]

[hinamie]

post-graduation trip airport looks

[haveihitanerve]

Okay so wait you guys all know that thing that teachers or parents do were they forget that they don't have to speak in like a baby voice all the time and accidentally interact with grown adults in the same manner they do with a child right? Okay so imagine that- but with Batman and the Justice League

Like-

Hal and Barry are arguing and suddenly Batman goes, “boys, thats not very nice is it?” in like a kid voice

Or Oliver is complaining about getting patched up after a fight and Batman chides, “You take the hit you gotta take the stitch baby,” 

Or Clark is mumbling something and Bats goes, “Speak up sweetheart, lets use our speech properly yeah?”

Or Diana accidentally punches a man in the face when hes already down. Batman tsks, “Come on darling, what did we talk about? One hit only.”

Or Oliver is leaving for a mission and Dinah kisses him goodbye and then he walks away, only for Batman to go, “Say bye bye!” 

AGDJFDYSGUKSRHGBDF

Just please imagine their faces for me.

And Batman grimaces lightly afterwards every time and just leaves and the League is flabbergasted

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

Wyll is so fucking funny and no amount of acknowledgement about this could ever be enough. He's literally walking around being so casually hilarious completely under-the-radar. He calls Halsin a "thick hunk of an elf". He once accidently implied that he was fucking an ogre instead of killing it and then proceeded to absolutely stumble his way through explaining. He gets excited by Lae'zel talking about carnal pleasures. He canonically tells his pessimistic thoughts to shut the hell up. He volunteers to babysit Shadowheart's hypothetical werewolf babies as long as she gets him gloves. He tries to give Gale a hero moniker like his own. He jokes that his father, the Grand Duke of Baldur's Gate, can't spell. He calls Astarion "Mister Fangs". He makes up storybook chapter names for his own fucking adventures. As a child he got chased by the Flaming Fist for stealing fruit, nearly drowned trying to find mermaids in the harbor, and almost successfully broke into the Counting House. He reads monster erotica, and is not ashamed to tell you about it. He ranks eating pudding among life's greatest moments. He will, without shame and completely unprompted, meow at you. He is 24 years old.

[crumplstiltskin]

bros au but they're 12 years apart and jujutsu tech scouted sukuna quite young

[teaboot]

Important discovery this morning

(It's grapefruit)

[s0up1ta]

"so grunkle ford how do you know bill?"

"... that's not important."