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so true

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I wish I was a muppet so I could flail uncontrollably with no consequences. And for the scrunch

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The idea that you have to choose between a job that pays well or a job that's meaningful and actually does good for people is so small minded, it's so damn easy to get a job that's meaningless, miserable and pays like shit

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send me anywhere, take me out

i'm the well they're gonna drag you down

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it's your right as a pedestrian to cross the street whenever you feel like it

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Better late than never.

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at least sisyphus only had one never-ending task. i have like 50 and all of them cost money

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normalize making sounds at eachother. if i can meow at you unprompted ESPECIALLY if you meow back we are best friends. meow mrrow

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listening and learning

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AITA for lying to my dog about food being 'spicy?'

A while back I taught my dog what spicy foods are (by letting her sniff them and saying "Uh oh! Spicy!") and she figured out that it means it'll smell/taste bad and she immediately loses interest. It was initially an accident but it became really handy in getting her to leave food alone if it might hurt her.

Recently though I've started saying "Uh oh! Spicy!" about any food I don't want her to eat. If she's sitting and staring at me eating a regular non-spicy snack and I don't want to share, I'll tell her it's spicy so she'll stop begging for it. She believes me 100% of the time. She does have a 'leave it' command that she obeys as well, but she always acts so sad whenever I tell her to 'leave it' and it's something she wants.

I feel a little bad because she's an older dog (10y/o) and maybe I SHOULD be sharing my snacks with her, but sometimes a man's gotta enjoy his food in peace without a little creature gazing longingly at him the entire time and crying like the world's soggiest beast.

Included is a picture of her making her very best begging face so that everyone can accurately judge how evil I am for lying to her.

What are these acronyms?

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fitness girlies

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good morning everyone here is a tribute to the chaos that was the animaniacs twitter yesterday ❤️

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Hello skinny tgirl. Lately you've been complaining that your tits aren't growing. In front of you is a plate of food.

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He's so real

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Door at Alnwick Garden, Northumberland.