#i've not gotten this far in month challenges like this so . still a win

[pine-arten]

i genuinely kept forgetting to post these

i'm pretty burnt out on drawing, so i decided to end the cringetober challenge. as much as i would like to complete it, i would die

day 16 (objecthead) day 15/18 (song lyrics/old art redraw)

i got through halfway the month, which is honestly still a win for me.

look here for a cropped version of the redraw, and the original picture

[oodlyenough]

apollo justice: ace attorney thoughts

over the weekend I finished playing AA4 so I wanted to try to put my thoughts in order. much to think about etc

spoilers for the whole game obv, but i haven't played AA5 or AA6 yet so any mention of those are speculation lol

I had heard some pretty mixed reactions to AA4 and I had a lot of reservations going in. It's also probably the AA game I've played that I've been the most spoiled for, which is a shame but probably an unavoidable consequence of waiting for the port while engaging with the fandom. I don't usually like being spoiled but I think knowing the broad strokes of what to expect actually helped here. I can imagine an AU where I blitzed through the first trilogy and onto 4 with no idea of what was coming and being... very upset and disappointed by the direction it took. Having several months to brace for things like Phoenix's disbarment, the 7 year gap, Trucy, etc definitely softened those blows and made me more amenable to them than I would've been otherwise.

Cases

For the most part I thought the puzzle solving was good and the pacing was solid. The puzzles were mostly challenging enough to be satisfying to solve but not so challenging as to be infuriating, and I don't think I needed a walkthrough at all. 4-1 is one of the best tutorial cases in the franchise so far (though I'd give the edge to 3-1) and 4-4 was a really cool finale. The middle two cases tbh I also found fairly charming, and there's usually a least one case in the middle that seems to drag forever, so that was a pleasant surprise. I played Investigations 1 right before this, and I thought both the puzzles and pacing in that game were frankly horrible, so AA4 won a lot of points just with that.

I did think Turnabout Corner and Serenade would be more relevant in the grand scheme of things. The half-spoilers I knew had me expecting a much bigger web of conspriacy than we ended up with -- I expected it to be more than coincidence that Phoenix got hit by a car, more than coincidence that the Borginian egg coccoons are related to poison etc ... like... I fully assumed this was going to tie into the atroquinine plot. But I guess not ... ? Lol

Characters

The new main cast are all very likable, despite my initial reluctance to have a new main cast to begin with. Klavier was an interesting change of pace as prosecutor, in that he wasn't particularly antagonistic outside of the court, nor was he particularly preoccupied with winning, but he was still fun and challenging enough to face off against. Trucy was fun and delightfully bonkers as all assistants should be. Apollo's longsuffering exasperation was hilarious. Ema is the BEST I loved having her as the detective I wish she was there all the time.

I loved Beanix, for the most part. I can see why he rubs some people the wrong way, and tbh I'm glad his last canon outing isn't ... this. But I didn't find him wildly out of character, or at least, when he was feeling "out of character" vs the trilogy it made sense given the intervening events. I also thought it was fun to see him from the outside and see what a galaxybrain 5d chess master he is. I do wish we'd gotten to see more genuine moments of him with Trucy.

Kristoph was fun as a villain, though I have to say fandom led me to believe he was much more of a mastermind puppeteer than he seemed to be in reality. I was expecting a whole decade worth of conspiracies! Instead he fucked up once and struggled to fix it for seven years, lol. I also found the Kristoph/Phoenix relationship a) very fascinating, b) not really what I'd been led to believe by fandom (shocker). I like the canon more though -- I like that instead of being a retread of the Dollie betrayal-from-someone-you-love it was two guys who hate each other being forced to play nice as part of their own schemes.

Criticism

I think it's fairly obvious AA4 was meant to be a soft reboot of the series, to pivot away from the trilogy cast and set up our new heroes in Apollo, Trucy, and I guess Klavier. I think this is probably the entire explanation behind Maya and Edgeworth (and others but lbr those are the big two)'s conspicuous absence... but that doesn't make their absence any less conspicuous. I can squint and forgive neither of them being there when Phoenix is accused of murder, even though I find that insane. I can squint around Maya maybe being off in Kurain during the Enigmar trial, even though I think they could've used a line of dialogue to explain it. But then we started playing past-Phoenix for huge portions of investigation and that started to fall apart for me. Sure, maybe he's pushing his friends away because he's depressed, or maybe he wants to keep Maya out of things because he thinks it's dangerous, or whatever -- you could at least throw in a line or two saying as much. Not mentioning them at all and setting AA4 so closely after AA3, where Phoenix fell through a bridge to save Maya and Edgeworth chartered a private jet, just feels ridiculous.

I also think, at the end of the day, the story here was focused on and pivoting around Phoenix. The core question of the game is "what the hell happened to/is up with Phoenix Wright?" I love Phoenix, so that alone isn't a negative -- except that I think it meant Apollo, Klavier and even Trucy felt underwritten. Trucy and Klavier have such personal stakes in the unfolding events with the Gramaryes and Kristoph, but we only spend a little time and hints on how that might influence Trucy, who mostly falls into the AA weird girl pattern of brushing off major trauma instantly. (Maya got this a lot too in the original trilogy.)

Klavier ... I like Klavier, but they did not do much with him. How did he feel about Kristoph going to jail? He doesn't seem to hold it against Apollo, which is uh, noble, but perhaps not believable. He says he values honesty and truth but do we know why?

Apollo, likable as he was, felt like a passenger in his "own" game, rather than a major character. He doesn't even solve much of the stuff happening in the big overarching mystery -- he is Phoenix's avatar in court, presenting evidence and clues Phoenix left for him. Unlike Trucy and Klavier, who I am pretty sure take a back seat from now on, I guess Apollo still has two more games to try and flesh himself out ... lol but I also know fan reception of those two is not great, so my expectations there are minimal.

Overall

A really solid game that I enjoyed playing, though I can see why it's controversial and not some people's favourite, if they really loved the trilogy. I think it's debatable whether this was the best/only way to continue the series after AA3. And I am excited to read and write a billion 7 year gap fics now.

[chimachapterbooks]

Worriz’s Challenge

Eris perched on a rock and gazed down at the ground far below, her brow knitted with concern.

Just as she had for the last six days, she could see Wolves prowling at the base of the cliffs that the Eagles called home. Now and then, one of the Wolves would look up at her, flash a savage grin, and give a short howl. She did her best to ignore the taunts. But this was becoming a concern.

Ever since the battle for CHI had begun among the tribes, the Wolves had been encroaching on Eagle teritory.

Normally, the Wolf pack was constantly on the move. But this pack was acting like they were here to stay. They were noisy, messy, and threw loud parties late into the night so that none of the Eagles could sleep.

It might have just been a little inconvenience, except for two things: One, the Eagles needed to be able to fly down to the ground to find food, and the Wolves were making that dangerous to do. And two, it was almost time for the Eagles to get their monthly share of the powerful CHi from the Lions, and Eris was sure the Wolves were here to prevent that from happening.

if only we could find some way to make them go away, she thought. But how?

Just then, Eglor flew by. He was very excited, and kept shouting, "I've done it! 've done it!" All the Wolves looked up to see what the commotion was about.

"Shhhh!" warned Eris. "What have you done?"

But Eglor was too excited to speak quietly. "I've perfected a machine that can hurl an Eagle all the way from one end of the forest to the other, faster than any beast that runs or flies. From now on, instead of flap, flap, flap to get from one place to another, it will be zip, zip, zip!"

"Zip, zip, zip?" said one of the Wolves, laughing.

"Sounds more like flop, flop, flop to me!"

Eglor wheeled in the air and looked down at the Wolf.

"Ha! With my machine, any Eagle could outrace a Wolf by twice the speed. That's just scientific fact. There's not even the teeniest, tiniest, most microscopic room for doubt."

"Want to bet?" growled Worriz. The pack leader had wandered over to see what the rest of the Wolves were so interested in. Now he eyed Eglor with a mocking smile.

"Eglor, don't." Eris tried to hold her friend back.

"No good can come from arguing with the Wolves."

But Eglor's pride as an inventor was at stake now.

"Yes, I do want to bet!" he announced loudly.

"All right, then," said Worriz. "I'll bet you I can make it to the far end of the woods faster than any Eagle launched from your machine. If I win, you Eagles give up your share of CHI to us this month."

"And if you lose," said

Eglor, "you go away and leave our nesting area alone!"

Eris slapped a wing against her forehead. What had Eglor just gotten them into?

"Deal," said Worriz. "We race tomorrow ... That is, if you can find someone foolish enough to challenge me."

"Tomorrow?" stammered Eglor. He suddenly sounded a bit nervous. "Now, see here, the machine works— know it does—but it hasn't been fully tested yet, and there are still a few things—"

The Wolves howled with laughter. One of them said,

"You know what they say about Eagles—all flash and feathers."

"If you want to back down, bird," Worriz sneered,

"then I guess-"

"'ll do it!" Eris interrupted him. "I'll race you!"

After she had said it, she could hardly believe the words had come out of her beak. But the Wolves were getting under her feathers with all their insults, and maybe this was the one way to get them to leave their nesting grounds for good. Besides, Eglor was a great inventor. If he said his machine could make her go zip, zip, zip, then it could.

"All right then," Worriz snarled. "Tomorrow. Dawn.

Be here."

The Wolves turned to talk amongst themselves.

Suddenly, Worriz looked sharply back up at Eris. "Oh, and one more rule," he snapped. "No help from the Lions, right, Eagle? For this challenge, you fly solo."

All the Wolves laughed.

—————

"It doesn't work," said Eglor sadly. "I don't know what happened, but it's not working."

"What do you mean?" asked Eris, in shock. "You told the Wolves there wasn't the teeniest, tiniest room for doubt."

It was the middle of the night. Eglor had taken Eris to see his machine, which consisted of a catapult with a bowl at the end attached to a much bigger metal apparatus by tightly wound springs. When Eglor triggered the contraption, the bowl would be propelled forward and anything inside it would go flying... at least, in theory.

But now the inventor Eagle didn't look so sure.

"When I tested it this afternoon, it worked fine," Eglor explained. "But then I started practicing tonight with things actually in the bowl, like bunches of apples, and . .. well, look for yourself."

Eris looked. There were smashed apples splattered all over the floor of Eglor's workshop. The machine just hurled them straight down at the ground.

"So if I get in this thing tomorrow morning. . . no zip?" she asked.

"More like splat," said Eglor. "We'll have to call off the bet."

"We can't," insisted Eris. "We'll lose our CHI to the Wolves, which will hurt the balance in Chima, and the Wolves will stay down there forever! I have to win the race... somehow. I just have to."

——————

"Did you do it?" whispered Worriz.

Wilhurt, another Wolf in the pack, nodded. "It was easy. I used a bellow plant to float up the mountain and then tied it down. I got to Eglor's workshop, and broke off part of his machine. Then let the air out of the bellow plant little by little so I could float back down. That Eagle won't be zipping anywhere, boss."

"Good," Worriz said with a wicked grin. "All that Eagle CHI is practically ours. Hey, maybe we'll challenge the Bears and the Gorillas to races, too. Let the Crocs fight battles we'll get all the CHI we want the old-fashioned way: We'll cheat."

——————

By dawn, Eris had a plan ... sort of. It started with not telling Worriz the machine didn't work. The second part involved getting some help from someone she would normally stay far away from.

Skinnit the Skunk was actually a very nice animal who didn't have an enemy in the world. But no one really wanted to spend any time around him because ... well, he smelled really bad. It wasn't his fault. But no one wanted to risk keeping him company and maybe winding up smelling terribly, too. Still, Eris had always made an effort to be polite to him.

"Skinnit, can you do me a favor?" she asked, talking to him from high up in a tree.

"Me? Really? You want me to do you a favor?" Skinnit replied eagerly. No one ever asked him to do anything other than go away.

"That's right," said Eris. "It's nothing hard. I just want you to do ... that thing you do at a certain place and a certain time."

Skinnit frowned. "You mean you want me to make a stink?" he asked. That was what he did best, but it always made other animals run away. Why would Eris want him to do that?

"Just trust me," Eris reassured him. "You'll be doing something nice for all the Eagles."

"If you say so," Skinnit answered, smiling. "But you had better hold your beak—it's going to get smelly around here!"

Eris grinned. "Thanks, Skinnit," she said. "I knew I could count on you." With that, she flew off. She had a few more non-rule-breaking favors to ask of some old friends.

———————

After making a few more stops, Eris was ready for the start of the race. She perched in Eglor's lab, waiting for the signal to start. Down below, Worriz was crouched down, ready to run.

"You might as well hand over that CHI now, bird,"

Worriz called up. "It's as good as ours!"

"We'll just see about that," Eris shouted back down.

She glanced over at Eglor, and gave him a wink. The inventor Eagle looked very nervous, but he nodded back.

One of the Wolves stood at the base of the rock spire, holding a palm leaf to start the race. A moment later, he waved the leaf high in the air, and the race was on!

Eris leaped out from Eglor's lab, flying as fast as she could, so anyone looking from below would think she had been rocketed out into the sky. Worriz was running at top speed, too, hoping to put some distance between himself and the Eagle.

As she soared above the canopy of trees, Eris did her best to keep an eye on Worriz, even if she could only see him for a few seconds now and then. She knew the Wolf would would take the fastest path through the forest. In fact, she was counting on it.

In the woods, Worriz was feeling confident. The pack had blazed a new trail through the forest lately, one that made getting from one end to the other a snap. All he had to do was follow the scent the vehicles had left and he couldn't go wrong. He put his nose to the ground, took a big sniff...

... and he almost fell over! His nose was full of an incredibly horrible smell, so bad it made his eyes water.

He shook his head, trying to make the odor go away. But it didn't. It was so overpowering that now he couldn't smell anything else. Worriz knew there was only one animal in the forest who could make a smell that bad.

"Skinnit!" he howled.

Off to the side of the path, the little skunk ran away, disappearing into the trees.

"All right, I don't need my nose," Worriz

grumbled to himself. "I can remember the path .. sort of. I know there were trees ... and a big rock... and some dirt... hmm...

Worriz picked a direction that looked right and started to run again. At one point, he glanced up and spotted Eris through the trees. The Eagle was falling behind.

All he needed to do was put on an extra burst of speed and he was sure to win.

Just then, he heard an enormous rustling in the woods ahead. It sounded like a huge herd of creatures on the move. But there were no sounds of foliage tearing or ground being ripped up the way he would have expected. As he rounded a bend, he discovered why: It was a tribe of Gorillas in their massive Gorilla Machines. But instead of smashing through the jungle the way the Wolf Vehicles did, the Gorillas were being extra careful not to disturb anything as they passed.

The Gorillas' respect for nature meant that they had to move very slowly in their huge machines so they didn't accidentally trample any flowers or even weeds.

"Come on!" Worriz growled. "Hurry it up!"

Three of the Gorillas stopped right in Worriz's path.

"Hey, Wolf, why are you in such a hurry?" said the first Gorilla, looking down from the cockpit of his huge vehicle.

"Yeah, you have to savor every minute of life, the way you do a really good banana," said the second.

"Maybe you just don't see it," said the third. "You Wolves always have your noses to the ground, and you don't look up to see the sky!"

Over Worriz's protests, the Gorillas proceeded to tell him all about how much better life was when you were in tune with all of nature. Even worse, all the other Gorillas stopped to listen, nodding their heads and smiling. It felt like forever before they finally finished and moved on, their machines going even slower than before.

When the Gorillas had finally passed, Worriz ran faster than he ever had in his life. He was heading for the quick-moving river that flowed through this part of the forest. If he dove in and let the waters carry him, he could still beat Eris. Sure, he wouldn't technically be racing. But so what? The only thing that mattered to him was winning!

He was just about to dive into the river when, from behind the trees, a bunch of small figures appeared in his path. Worriz nearly skidded to a halt. He couldn't believe his eyes. Nearly two dozen teenage foxes were blocking him, all smiling and yipping and jumping up and down. Because as everyone in Chima knew, teenage foxes thought that the Wolves were the coolest animals in the forest. Especially the Wolf Pack leader, Worriz.

"Look, it's Worriz!" cried one.

"I told you he was coming!" squealed another.

"Wow, look how cool he is!"

"I just have to get his autograph! I have to!" Before Worriz knew what was happening, he was being mobbed by the teenage foxes! They were tugging at his fur, running back and forth in front of him, and begging for his signature.

"We're your biggest fans," said one of the foxes breathlessly. "You're the coolest Wolf in Chima!"

"I won," said the Eagle. "So pack up your pack and move on."

But Worriz sneered. "Ha!" he said. "That's what you think. Your Lion pals aren't here, so you can't prove you won the race. Looks like your CHI for this month is ours. Hand it over!"

Eris shook her head, a knowing grin crossing her face. She pointed up at the sky. A whole flock of sparrows was circling overhead, cheering wildly for Eris.

"I don't need the Lions to prove I beat you," she said.

"Those sparrows saw the entire race. It's over, Worriz."

Worriz smacked his head and groaned. Even with cheating, he had still lost to the Eagles! "Fine," he grumbled. "You got lucky this time. But next time, mark my words, you won't be so lucky!"

Eris chuckled. "It wasn't luck," she said as a sparrow came and landed on her hand. "Don't you know by now? I have lots of friends."

[c7thetumbler]

Quick Game Reviews: August 2024

Continuing on with August! A few days late because I was neck deep in the last game on here. It's very platformer heavy this month as well, but I was on a roll.

image from Steam page

Earth Defense Force 6 (Steam)

EDF! EDF!

EDF is a series that knows what it's about. Having played 4 and 5 on Steam as well, this is just more of that. The game boasts half as many more missions as 5 had, which is astonishing because 5 had 100 and that felt like way too many. I'm playing with friends and still haven't beaten it, but I hope to sometime soon.

The main difference I would say between this and 5 would be the plot. It's still the same tacky, B-movie plot with funny stilted dialogue and crazy scenarios, but they introduced a new element to it that lets it get even crazier but also makes me interested in what's going on past "How are we going to win". Gameplay wise, there's new weapons and enemies of course, and some of those new enemies require much more specific ways of dealing with them, but it still usually boils down to "Shoot them all really fast, and if they have a weak point shoot that." It's good, near-mindless fun and I appreciate that.

If you've played an EDF game before, this is more of the same and definitely best with a group of friends. If you haven't, keep that in mind and maybe wait for a sale.

Screenshot from my switch

New Pokémon Snap (Switch)

I didn't own Pokémon Snap on it's original release; I believe the first time I played it was on Wii VC, if not WiiU VC, so I had gotten far past 1st-gen hype that carried it a lot. It's a fun game, but it's pretty short and the lack of variety on each individual course wasn't doing it any favors. That's not to say I disliked it, but when this new one was announced I wasn't really in any hurry to try it out.

To it's credit, it's done a great job of adding features in a way that solves those issues with the original. You can level up each area as you get more points in it, which unlocks alternate routes and events in each one, and a number of them allow you to go at night which is a completely different experience as well. Your Pokedex also store 4 different rankings of pictures which have their own scoreboard, so you're encouraged to take pictures of the same Pokémon over and over again to get the best you can. I'll say this is a huge improvement, and worth the price of the game in terms of length at least, and that's without me going too far into the "post-game" content.

The game is a lot prettier than its current generation at the time, Gen 8, which is really funny given how poorly that game is run. It does a good job of showing you how expressive, interesting, and deep world that the Pokémon games have built but never have been able to explore upon fully due to the scope of those games and Gamefreak's... development practices. Pokémon's a franchise with a lot of incredibly unique gaming potential and side games like this do a great job of exploring that.

I did however find myself getting frustrated at some points. The Challenge system they have where NPC's give you tasks to try and get unique photos is very finnicky. I've often done pictures that I thought would fulfill their requirements, only for them to not even acknowledge it. I didn't complete a vast majority of them because of this; this kind of game benefits from not having to look things up online because the wonder and discovery is the point, but this could've used some work or an additional hint system for dumdums like me. Some of these challenges can also only be completed after unlocking levels and features and using them correctly, so it's especially frustrating to see the challenge pop up and attempt to do it several times only to discover that it's not possible until you hit level 3 and unlock the special glowy orb.

Overall though, this is Pokémon Snap but much larger and with a lot of great additions to the formula. If you enjoyed the gameplay of the original and want more, this will scratch that itch, but be prepared for some moments where you're confused on what to do next with little guidance.

Image from Steam page

Kitsune Tails (Steam)

I 100%'d this!

This is an adorable, very well done game. It's very much a love letter to SMB3 with some smaller SMW elements thrown in, and they're not only aware of that they've fully embraced it. I'd recommend it for anyone that just loved those classic Mario platformers, as it'll check all those boxes you know and love.

Kitsune Tails also features its own support for importing custom levels or even minigames based off of Lua and its own internal assets, complete with documentation and examples inside the local files for the game. That's something you don't see a lot, and even though I never made anything for it it was fun to mess around with. I will say that they will do themselves some favors if they find a way to make that work with Steam Workshop just inherently so players don't have to hunt around for files or join a discord with no anonymous accessibility (like forums used to do), but I won't count that against them because I have no idea how complicated that is. Update after I wrote this, Steam Workshop is now supported! That's the third time time they've updated the game with design changes and fixes that I was counting against it, which is very rad.

My only real complaints with it come in some more specific issues. A few levels could use some work design-wise; a few vertical levels really enjoy having enemies off-screen jump down to the next available platform to the player which is never fun, and there are some jumps and challenges that just don't feel right. Some enemies have clearly been designed to exploit difficult jumps and player behaviors. Monkeys that throw down diagonally at unforgiving intervals, and then drop down at an unavoidable rate. Ninja raccoons throw 3 projectiles very quickly as opposed to the traditional single projectile from piranha plants, ghosts perpetually chase you rather than being more manageable about directions your facing. It can lead to a lot of frustrating, repetitive fails that don't feel as fair as they could be, but ultimately with enough practice and patience nothing is insurmountable. Midway through my last run to get the hardest achievement they updated some of the problem jumps to be a bit easier which is appreciated, but these enemy issues don't feel addressable in the same way.

The story is adorable and lovely and genuine. Don't let "SMB3 but with fox girl lesbians," while true, color your perception of how the game presents itself or should play. This is a labor of love from a group of speedrunners, Mario fans, and the community that has kept that alive and evergreen.

Screenshot from my Switch

Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Rescue Team DX (Switch)

I wanted to get a game I could chill with on the couch while listening to podcasts with a drink and my cat, so I picked this up again. I had played the original game on DS and remember liking it a lot, and I've played a number of Mystery Dungeon-esque games in various forms so I figured this would be a good fit. The amount of time between then and now of course (20ish years?) allowed me to forget most of the story beats and I'm not sure entirely of everything that changed, but I'll try and recollect as much as I can.

Visually the filter really works for it; the storybook aesthetic is a lot more interesting than just generic Pokémon cartoon looks, and they recreated everything in 3D very well. The inclusion of several Gen 4 Pokémon, something which at the time of the original release wasn't out yet, was fun to see again and made me nostalgic for when Gamefreak actually tried to do tie ins like that. In terms of changes, I wish they had kept in the Basic Attack that was in the base game, as without it PP management becomes a real chore. While it's cool to see some enemies Mega-evolve in the later dungeons as well, it's not really much of a feature because every Pokémon gets that stat bonus if the right conditions are met anyway.

So from my perspective, this is really just an HD port of the original game; if they added new Pokémon or dungeons to it then they're VERY late in the game and I never grinded enough to get to them. So now I have to jump back to my running bit with Switch remakes releasing at crazy prices. This is available for $59.99 digitally, full brand new Switch Game price, despite just being a rerelease of a GBA/DS game. That's criminal; something like this should release for $30 tops, and without any real new content to justify that price increase there's absolutely no reason it should be less. They really undercut my point here though because just after I picked this up, they released the GBA version of the game on NSO+, so like. Just play that. Or if you don't have NSO+, I'll fall back on my previous statement from last month that The value of these 20+ year old games is essentially free given that it's so easy to find them online, they've been iterated on so many times, and the original developers aren't getting a cent of that anyway. I'm not against remakes, but let's start being realistic about it: if pirating the original takes as much effort as buying it and gives you a near identical experience to the remake, then the remake wasn't needed.

Save your cash. If you want a great Pokémon Mystery Dungeon experience, Explorers of Sky for the DS is generally considered the best in series, and I'd like to see them actually make an effort to drastically improve on this side-series next time.

Image from Steam page

Penny's Big Breakaway (Steam)

I 100%'d this as well!

I was super-excited for this when it was first announced. It was developed by Christian Whitehead and the team behind Sonic Mania, which is hands-down the best 2D Sonic game even still, and they proved that they could figure out and distill the formula down to one the best it could be. So seeing them do a 3D platformer that looked like it would build off of 2D Sonic momentum mentality in a way that 3D Sonic never did was exciting.

I may have over-hyped it. That's not to say this is a bad game; far from it! I had a lot of fun with it and enjoyed a lot of the challenges it brought. It's movement is well crafted and a lot of thought clearly went into the different ways a player could move around the world. But the game is less "3D, momentum-Based Sonic" and more "Mario Odyssey with a Yo-yo instead of a cap." There are a few ways to quickly build or gain speed, but overall most of your movement is going to be rolling on your yo-yo until you get to precision platforming, and then you need to take it slower to do your normal jump, swing jump, double jump, forward dive, etc. to get where you need to go.

The game has a combo system that reminds me a lot of Pizza Tower's combo system mixed with a skateboarding game's points. You do combos by doing tricks (any movement that isn't just walking and a normal jump), and the game feels like you can carry a combo through the entire level if you play your moves very precisely. In my experience however, that's pretty close to impossible and it's a little unclear what specifically breaks your combo. Often times I'm left trying to ride my yo-yo back and forth to figure out how to land on ground without actually landing on ground, and it didn't feel great in those moments. When everything worked out though it felt really fun, and I could see how a mastery of the mechanics could really make everything feel good.

Aesthetically the game looks great. Very heavily stylized in a way that reminds me of Sonic 3D blast and well-selected palette's and themes to bring it all together. Character design is a little wacky, but it fits within it and it's a very well executed look overall; something a lot of indies struggle with so it's great to see that they were able to carry over that skillset from how well they handled Sonic Mania.

So in short, if Mario Odyssey-style movement in Mario 3D land type linear levels appeals to you, then this is a good pick-up! It will however take a little while to get used to the movement in order to properly understand how the game wants you to traverse it.

Image from Steam page

Haiku, the Robot (Steam)

I nearly 100%'d this game! There's an achievement for going through it without repairing yourself or getting chips that help with that (ie, only healing at checkpoints), and I ruined that pretty early. I might go back and do that someday though.

This game is the "prequel" to Rusty's Retirement, which I reviewed last post. It's more that Rusty's Retirement just uses the same characters and some of the aesthetics. But it caused me to be interested in it, and I had a good time with it! It's very much a Hollow-Knight inspired metroidvania, right down to the healing ability and "chips" working like badges. It doesn't hold your hand for exploring, but to the game's credit I never felt lost, which is a problem I had with Hollow Knight itself.

The aesthetic is post-apocalyptic, rusty metal underground entirely inhabited by robots under attack from a virus that causes them to attack each other. The color palette is very muted; You're going to see a lot of Oranges, greys, and browns to match the very rusty look. It works well for it and a few bosses make a point to throw in other accents, but I can see some people getting tired of it.

Gameplay wise it's pretty solid! Everything feels pretty good, some of the traversal abilities are fun to mess around with, there's a lot of build options without feeling like some are objectively better than the other. Honestly, it's just a really solid title. If you like Hollow Knight or tried it and were a bit put off by its difficulty, then this is a great pick-up or alternative.

Image from Steam page

Psychonauts 2 (Steam)

I also 100%'d this

I really, really liked Psychonauts when I first played it on steam over a decade ago. It had a few issues, but overall was a really fun and quirky 3D platformer at a time when those had fallen a bit out of favor. The story and visuals were wacky, it was funny, and had a lot of unique challenges. I did not back any Psychonauts 2 funding attempts though due to the things going around about double fine and Tim Schafer's inability to handle scope, so I was never expecting this to come out. When it did I bought it and it's been in my backlog ever since.

I do really want to like this game; the platforming is fun, the progression and exploration are like how I remember. But this game really seems like it doesn't want you to play it. It took half of my time with the game to start to feel like there's more gameplay than cutscenes. Over and Over again it'll remind you how incredibly linear it is as you get to a new obstacle, area, or just story beat and then just say "hey you need to stop right there and listen to the story." It feels like it inherently clashes with the collectathon genre it's a part of; you want time with yourself and the world to go and explore and find things, but you're not sure if you've fully explored an area before you're thrown out of it entirely and usually irreversibly for a long time.

The story itself is interesting. It too a while to get into due to its first half doing some poor setup of the previous game(s) that made me uninvested in the nuance it was trying to get me into. I shouldn't feel like I need to have played Rhombus of Ruin, the VR exclusive game that occurred between 1 and 2, to have an understanding of a lot of these characters, but I feel like I missed out on a lot having not played it. Eventually though it starts building it's own story with those building blocks, and that's when it gets really good.

After I unlocked the real hub world and done about 3-4 sub worlds related to it, it started to feel like what I remember. It'll still do cutscenes to contextualize the strange, psychedelic worlds and challenges you see, but then it will for the most part let you play in them without throwing you into a cutscene and then out of the level entirely again. As I approached the end the cutscenes interruption got a little more bare able as the story's various threads tied together into something that didn't feel like padding, but the rocky start is a big ask and I can see players who haven't even touched either of the original games not being able to get key elements.

Combat is still a little wonky. I find myself mostly sticking to ranged attacks and gimmick abilities that you need to counter with rather than using the melee abilities that much. The PSI abilities themselves really could've used an update in terms of how they're accessed; You can map them to any one of the 4 shoulder buttons, but you'll always want levitation and your hand abilities available because they're just incredibly useful in and out of combat. That leaves you constantly opening a poorly handled radial menu to swap between you fire, ranged attack, and more situational abilities they like to swap between frequently. Given the either contextual nature of the gimmick abilities vs the universal ones, it feels like they didn't need a swap menu at all and could've incorporated the movement ones more easily into a context-specific button. I'm only ever going to need to jump between thought bubbles when there are thought bubbles around, use clairvoyance when creatures are nearby, slow time when a platform nearby is moving too fast etc., and that would free up the remaining buttons for your way more present actions of jumping/rolling, grabbing things, and combat abilities. It would lower the amount of unaccounted for freedom in handling combat and traversing levels, granted, but the game doesn't feel like it has enough depth and isn't open enough for that to feel like a bad trade-off.

If you liked the original Psychonauts and don't mind your gameplay being interrupted, having to to go back to worlds way later to 100% them, and are interested more in story, this is for you. If you want a seamless 3D platforming collectathon experience, I'd stay clear.

Image from the Gamebanana page

Super Mario Eclipse (Super Mario Sunshine GC mod)

This one surprised me; I had heard of a number of great Sunshine hacks that expanded on the game a lot more, but this one combines elements of a lot of them into one to make basically the most definitive Super Mario Sunshine experience + features and worlds that really bring it together well.

For the basics, the game starts out introducing new movement options and changes from vanilla, which is great. The hover burst, basically a double jump that sacrifices the length of the hover for an added boost, and it makes the game play a lot better. The hover nozzle course shows off dive boosting so you can fly crazy distances, and the turbo nozzle no longer has a charge up and controls much easier. Yoshi has also been updated to hatch automatically without fruit, and in this state he can enter water without dying until he eats a fruit, in which case he changes back to normal behavior. It all adds to the controls Sunshine really struggles with, and while the base layer is still there they're vast improvements.

The game contains the entirety of the original Super Mario Sunshine, including the tedious blue coin hunt, but adds quite a few additional levels. The levels are now interconnected, with physical paths between them being separate mini-rooms that add a lot of character to the game and make the world feel cohesive. Delfino also has 4 new levels that tie directly into the game and link nicely as well, though you can clearly tell what is new content and what isn't just because of the way Level geometry works out. Still, it really brings the whole game together, and with additions such as not kicking you out when you get shines that don't require a reload and a pause-menu Shine/Blue coin counter you're not left struggling as much as the original Sunshine had you doing.

Once you beat Bowser, you unlock Daisy Cruiser and a bunch more levels that, while smaller than the Delfino levels, are still pretty fun in their own right. I would've liked it if they had kept with the tropical + interconnected themes with these levels personally, as I think the best one of these levels is Yoshi's Island which actually does, but still it's a great amount of new content. Daisy Cruiser and Peach Beach are brought in directly from double dash, so there's some scaling issues and problems with layout that could've used some work rather than a direct port, but again they're still pretty fun. There's 240 Shines in this game, with 420 Blue Coins, and even after that there's still a large chunk of game for the 100% completion bonus, so you'll be spending a LONG time with this if you really love sunshine.

If you've not revisited Sunshine in a long time or have the itch to pick it up again, this is definitely the best way to do it. Really rounds out what was otherwise a pretty incomplete feeling game into a cohesive world and fun experience.

[stargazer-sims]

Journal Entry #60

Journal Entry #59 // STORY INDEX

Yuri

At the beginning of September, Victor and I moved into our forever home.

We thought we might go in the middle of the month, but I knew Victor wanted to have time to begin training with his new coach before the start of the competitive snowboarding season, and I wanted to be settled into our house in time to celebrate my birthday, so I suggested that we should arrange to go sooner. Victor seemed surprised, but he was pleased, and it made me happy to offer something he genuinely wanted without feeling like I was doing it as some sort of repayment for an imaginary debt I owe him.

That's one truth I've come to realize over the course of this year; the debt really was imaginary. Victor loves me, and he does things for me because he wants to help me and make my life easier. He never expects me to repay him deed for deed. All he wants is for me to do my best to help him whenever I can.

Sometimes my best is quite a lot, and sometimes I’m not physically capable of doing much of anything. Either way, it’s okay. Not being able to do everything all the time doesn't make me a bad person or a failure as a husband, and I'm beginning to understand that it was only my insecurity and lack of self-worth that made me believe it did.

Learning to trust myself and to believe in my own abilities and my value as a person hasn't been easy. Some days, I struggle to find even one affirming thing to say, and that's when I know I need to ask for help.

Doing that was difficult at first, because I had to get over the hurdle of thinking that asking for even the smallest thing made me a burden to Victor or my family. Releasing the guilt and shame is an ongoing process, just like teaching myself to be more positive and self-confident is, but I'm determined to succeed. I owe it to everyone I love, and I owe it to me.

When I can't come up with an affirmation, Victor always knows what to do. Rather than simply saying something good about me and asking me to accept it, he challenges me to name something I accomplished during the previous few days. It might be something big like planning and cooking an entire meal on my own, or maybe it'll be something small like folding laundry or sending an email, but there's always something. Then, he gets me to stand in front of the full-length mirror in my room and congratulate myself aloud.

Initially, that felt like an utterly silly thing to do, but Victor told me his first coach used to get his students to do it before competitions. He said the coach used to tell them to look at themselves in the washroom mirror and tell themselves things like, “I am brave and I am strong. I want to win, but even if I don’t win this time, I won't give up trying.”

Now I look forward to my little early-morning pep talks. As ridiculous as this may sound, these days it actually feels good to look myself in the eyes and say something like that, because it's not just a rote exercise any more. I am brave and I am strong, and even if today's not my day, there's always tomorrow. It's an effort to pick myself up and keep going, but I won't quit, not when I've gotten this far.

Honestly, the thing I’m most proud of lately is eating. I still don’t really love consuming most foods, but eating feels less stressful to me now, and most of the time I’m able to look at food and think about eating without becoming anxious.

I'll admit, I have moments when I wish I could go back to formula and not have to put anything in my mouth. I still have my tube, and fresh formula is only as far away as the pharmacy, so the temptation is certainly there. When I feel like that, I have to remind myself of my goal and push through as best I can. Victor encourages me on my bad days too, and I always look at my sticker chart to remind me of the progress I've made so far.

Yes, for those who may be wondering, we did bring my sticker chart with us from Japan. Mama rolled it up and put it in one of those cardboard cylinders normally used for maps or architectural plans, and I carried it with me on the plane. it's hanging in our kitchen here in Willow Creek now.

If you're looking for an update on it, tomorrow is the twentieth of September — my twenty-sixth birthday, incidentally — and I'll only have twelve more days to go before I can say I've been formula-free for sixty consecutive days.

I’ve earned four small rewards so far, and in a couple of days I’ll earn the fifth one. I already know what it is, but Victor says we can’t bring it home until I complete this current ten-day stretch. It’s garden boxes, by the way. My previous reward was gardening tools, and the one before that was a book about growing vegetables.

I won’t be able to start my garden till next spring, but I’ve already picked out a spot for my boxes, and having the things now means a lot even if I have to wait to use them. Choosing what to grow and reading up on the best cultivation methods will keep me busy during the winter, and then I’ll be ready to plant my little crop when the time comes.

Victor says strawberries do well in this climate, so I think they’ll be first on my list. I’m already imagining eating strawberries I nurtured myself. Do you think love and hope will make them sweeter?

I haven’t even planted them yet and I have a whole multitude of emotions about them. Mostly, I’m excited. I’ve always wanted my own garden, but I pictured it as flowers, not vegetables and fruit. The idea that we have room here for both makes me happy, and I can hardly wait to grow my favourite Japanese lilies and hydrangea alongside my strawberries.

Anyway, please excuse me for getting slightly off-track. I was trying to tell you about my progress. Day sixty will be October first, and then I’ll get the big reward. I know what that’s going to be as well, and it is very big. Victor told me this morning. I guess he couldn’t keep the secret until my birthday, which is when he and my parents had evidently planned to tell me, but I forgive him. It was still a fantastic surprise, and to be fair, it’s a gift for both Victor and me, so I can’t blame him for being enthusiastic about it.

I’ll tell you exactly what it is in my next entry, but suffice it to say, keeping my eyes on this particular prize is going to motivate me through the next fortnight.

Unfortunately, even when I reach the sixty-day mark, I'll still have my tube for a few more weeks because my first appointment with Dr. Kim, my new specialist here in Willow Creek, isn't until the twenty-second of October. Meanwhile, I'm still having follow-up by way of video conferences with my nutritionist back in Kyoto, and Dr. Kasongo is technically still my doctor. When I finish my sixty days, I'll get to report my progress to them, and then Dr. Kasongo will probably write a letter to Dr. Kim to tell him I'm ready to have my tube removed.

Apparently, he can do it right there in his office in about five minutes. From what I understand, he'll numb the area with an injection of some sort of local anaesthetic, maybe something like the dentist uses, and then when I can't feel anything, he'll pull the device straight out. He'll put a dressing on the area, and we'll have to watch for any signs of infection for a week or so until the tube site heals closed.

According to the information sheet I read about G-tube removal, I'll have to rest a lot and eat several small meals of bland foods like rice and yogurt for the first forty-eight hours after it comes out, and I'll have to take showers instead of baths until the hole closes, but that's about it. It's not even supposed to be particularly painful. I'll have a scar, of course, but I can live with that.

Victor says it’ll be my badge of honour, a tangible reminder of having survived one of the toughest situations I’ve ever experienced.

“It’ll prove you’re a warrior,” he told me. “You fought the battle, and you came out on top. That’s the thing with courageous people, you know. They might be scared, but they don’t let their fear win.”

I will never, ever let my fear win again.

But, you’ve probably had enough of me going on about my health at this point, haven’t you? Let me rewind and tell you a bit about our lovely summer and about our move instead.

The biggest highlight of the summer for me was having everyone I love most all together in one place. I didn't think Victor would agree to stay at my parents' house. When Papa invited him, he said he'd have to think about it, and I was convinced he'd say no, but I'm glad he decided to take Papa up on his offer in the end. We shared my old room, and even though we’re married and it's totally normal for us to sleep in the same bed, somehow this felt like I was a teenager having a sleepover with my boyfriend every night.

Victor and I spent a lot of time together, going for long walks and visiting parts of town we hadn't seen in a while. We went to the public onsen in Kiyomatsu several times, and we visited the local shrine. On sunny days, we usually packed our lunch and ate it down by the lake. I've taken a liking to eating outside, and now I want a picnic table in the back yard so we can enjoy meals outdoors here as well.

Aside from our dates, picnics and leisurely walks, Victor and I also made time to hang out with our friends. I'm relieved to say, Fox forgave me for the horrible way I treated him. He seemed a little perplexed by my apology at first, not so much because of what I said but because of the way I bowed to him. Takahiro had to explain it to him, and then he ended up making a wholly unnecessary apology to me for the cultural confusion.

While I'm on the subject of Taka and Fox, I should mention that Taka passed his immigration English test. He also got accepted into the college program he applied for, and received his study permit in August. In a cosmic stroke of good timing, Taka's Canadian study permit arrived on the day Fox's Japanese work visa expired, and they left Japan together a few days later.

Back in the winter, Victor and I offered to let them stay with us, but a lot has changed for all of us since then. We were supposed to have arrived in Willow Creek ahead of them, but obviously that didn't happen. In the meantime, Fox was busy applying for jobs back home, and he got offered a social worker position with the Department of Community Services, beginning in September. He has a Master's degree in social work, so the offer was ideal, as the position is exactly what he'd trained for.

Fox's parents still aren't speaking to him, but his sister hasn't abandoned him. She helped him find an apartment that's affordable, close to the college so Taka can walk to school, and on a bus route that'll take Fox downtown to his office. They stayed with one of Fox's cousins for a few weeks until the old tenants moved out of the apartment, and then they moved into their place around the same time we moved into ours.

I can't even begin to describe how reassuring it is to have my friend Takahiro nearby, and he confessed that he felt similarly about me being here. As safe and content as we are with our respective partners, it's daunting to realize we're in a whole new country without our families and all the things we're used to. There's no escaping the fact that we're newcomers, but it's less scary knowing we're not alone in the experience.

I wish I could say things were going as well for Seiji as they are for Taka and me. Victor and I took a weekend trip to Kyoto in July, and we decided to visit him while we were there. We got the impression he didn't really want to see us, though, and we only stayed at his flat for about half an hour because the atmosphere was so awkward.

We made a lot of small talk, but he did tell us that he hates working at the convenience store and is trying to figure out what to do next. His mother wants him to come home and be her apprentice, but he said he can't picture himself as a tailor. That statement, when the only real furniture we saw in his flat besides a shikibuton, a thrifted table and two rickety chairs was a purpose-built desk with a sewing machine on it, was incongruous. But we didn't question it. Seiji is the only one who can decide which direction he should take.

Victor's theory is that Seiji does want to come home, but he's too embarrassed or ashamed to, after leaving the way he did. If that's the case, nothing we could've said would have convinced him anyway. He'll have to make up his own mind to set aside his pride or fear or whatever else may be holding him back.

It makes me sad to think of him being all alone in that bare, depressing flat. Despite all the hurtful things he said to me, I still consider him my friend and I want him to have a full and happy life. I'd like the chance to talk to him one-on-one, to explain some things and to let him get his feelings out. That may never happen, I realize, but I like to think I'm keeping the door open for the opportunity, should it ever arise.

The uncomfortable meeting with Seiji notwithstanding, Victor and I had the most magical weekend in Kyoto. We revisited all the places we went to during the week we'd gotten married. On one evening we attended an absolutely glorious performance by a local string quartet, and on another we went skating at an indoor rink where I was able to teach Victor a sporting skill for once. Would you believe I'm a better skater than him? Well... perhaps not better, but more graceful at least.

As for the rest of the summer, August passed in much the same way as July, with plenty of walks and outdoor meals and precious time with my family. One thing of particular note from August, however, was my meeting with Mr. Tanaka and the human resources representative from our firm. Dr. Kasongo submitted a report to our HR department recommending that my short-term disability claim should be extended until the end of the year. Her opinion is that I'll be medically ready to return to work in January, and both my boss and the HR department approved the extension.

I'm looking forward to getting back to work, but I'm also glad that I'll have the rest of the year to keep getting better. I was working remotely before, but now I'll be working extremely remotely, and I think it's great that I get to keep my old job even though I'm living in an entirely different country. Much to my delight, Mr. Tanaka seems to think so as well. He said it was a chance he couldn't possibly pass up because with me being fluent in English and physically located in Canada, our firm will be in a much better position to attract more North American clients. Mr. Tanaka said he'd contact me early in December to work out a schedule for regular meetings, and so we can discuss my job duties and responsibilities going forward.

Although he didn't directly say so, I think he may have given me a promotion of sorts. I'll be sure to let you know if that indeed turns out to be the case.

The other big thing in August was that Victor and I departed Japan on the thirty-first. We said our goodbyes to Mama and Yuki at home, and then Papa took us to the airport.

I could not have predicted how emotional that would be.

Papa and I have grown close this year, and I wish I could find the right way to express how much of the previously empty space in my soul he's filled. I knew I was missing him all those years when our relationship was so strained, but I could not have comprehended exactly how much until we both dropped our stubborn pride and opened up our hearts and minds to each other. Saying goodbye was even harder than I expected, and even though I knew it wouldn't be a permanent goodbye, part of me didn't want to let go.

He went with us all the way to the security area. We all stopped outside the big glass doors, and Papa held out his hand for Victor to shake.

"Take care of yourself, Victor," he said. "And take care of my son."

"I'll take the best care of him, I promise," Victor assured him. "Don't worry."

"I'm going to, regardless," Papa said. "But, I trust you."

"Thanks." Victor grinned mischievously at him. "But, you know, if you ever want to come check on him in person, you're welcome to visit us whenever you're able. We'll offer you a non-haunted bedroom."

Papa smiled. "Expect us for Winterfest, and tell Miss Sachiko that we wouldn't dream of taking her room."

"Will do," Victor said.

Then, Papa turned to me. For an instant, I thought he was going to shake my hand too, but at the last moment he pulled me into a hug. I can't remember the last time I was hugged by my father and didn't feel uncomfortable with it, but I had no problem this time. I put my arms around him and held on tight.

"We'll see you in a few months," he whispered into my hair, and I was startled when I realized he was crying.

But I guessed I couldn't fault him for it because my eyes certainly weren't dry either. "I'm really going to miss you."

"Me too," he said. "Think of me when you’re having your strawberry milkshakes."

"I'll think of you every day, no matter what I'm doing. You and Mama and Yuki."

"I love you, my treasure," he said quietly. "Be brave. Mama and I believe in you, and we know you're going to have a wonderful new life in Canada."

I was sobbing by that point, but I managed to get out, "I love you, Papa."

I meant it. Watcher help me… with every fibre of my being, I meant it, and I hadn't even grasped the full magnitude of my love for him until that very moment.

When he walked away, I couldn't watch. Victor held me while I cried my heart out, right there in the middle of the crowded airport.

"It's gonna be okay, Yuri," Victor said. "He's right, you know. We're gonna have a wonderful life."

It was hard to believe that when I felt like my heart was breaking, but once we were in the air and away, I began to feel better. On the plane, we looked at pictures of various places around Willow Creek that we'd taken back in June, photos of Dr. Grace and Dr. Julian's wedding, and some funny snaps we'd taken of ourselves and Yuki in my room at my parents’ house. We talked about our plans and dreams, and we made up stories about ourselves in the far future. Cute old men in rocking chairs on our front porch, Victor said, and the image made me smile.

We arrived at the tiny Willow Creek airport around mid-morning the next day, where we were met by Victor's mother. She drove us home, and as we were getting out of the car, she handed Victor a set of keys.

"Here you go," she said. "Your grandpa was supposed to be here with the set you gave him, but apparently he and Juliet went on a spur-of-the-moment road trip to Oasis Springs. He said to pass along his apologies. He’ll be here next week."

Victor looked amused. "How much you want to bet they're eloping?"

"Victor!" Dr. Grace exclaimed. "Michael wouldn't do that."

"You don't think?" Victor's raised eyebrow said he might've known something his mother didn't.

Dr. Grace shook her head. "You're impossible, you know. You and your Grandpa Michael.”

"Yeah, we get that a lot."

"Well, I'll leave the two of you to settle in," she said. "Come over around five o'clock. Julian's making his famous chicken parmigiana."

"What's that?" I asked.

"Italian food," Victor replied. "I think you'll like it."

“Strawberry cake for dessert,” Dr. Grace added. “Because I heard somebody around here really enjoys strawberries.”

Victor winked at me. “I wonder who that could be?”

“I’ll see you boys at dinner,” Dr. Grace said

She wished us a good day, and then she got back into her car and drove across the street. It's nice, living across the street from Victor's mother and stepfather. I know Victor's happy about it, and I like knowing we have somebody close we can rely on if we ever need anything.

Once Victor's mother had left, I was ready to go inside. I started for the doorstep, but Victor held up his hand to stop me. "Just wait right there, okay?"

"Why?" I asked, as I watched him bound up the steps.

He unlocked the front door and flung it wide open before rejoining me on the walkway. "Because," he said. "I'm gonna carry you over the threshold. Isn't that what they do in those historical movies you like?"

I laughed. "That's for newlyweds, Victor. We've been married nearly a year."

"Yeah, but we didn't have our own house when we were newlyweds, did we?"

"Are you certain you can even still lift me? And your arms—"

"My arms are fine, and you're not that much heavier than you used to be. If I can't still carry you a few meters, I think that'll be a sign to go harder on the weight training."

"Okay," I said. I was a little dubious, but also secretly thrilled at the thought of being carried. It'd been a long time, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss it.

"Okay," Victor said. "Ready?"

I nodded, and a second later he scooped me up as seemingly effortlessly as he ever had. He carried me up the steps and through the door, and then set me down carefully in the front hallway.

"Welcome home," he said.

I wanted to run through the place and look at everything, touch everything, and soak in the knowledge that this was our home. Mine and Victor's. It was the place where we'd truly build our intertwined lives, where we'd finish growing up and growing old together. Our goals and dreams would spring from here, and we'd live happily ever after because even if the world around us was in chaos, happiness comes from the inside. Victor taught me that, and once I finally understood it, my outlook changed completely. Life may not always be smooth sailing, but together we can survive any storm and come out smiling on the other side of it.

Before I ran off to explore every corner of the house and garden, there was something I needed to do.

"Thank you," I said.

"For what?"

"For not giving up on me. For being my soulmate and my superhero and my... everything."

Victor leaned down to kiss me, and I let myself melt into his embrace. I closed my eyes, breathing in the soft, sweet scent of coconut sunscreen and relishing the solid warmth of his body against mine. It was comforting and familiar, and it felt like the fulfillment of all my desires. For a moment, I forgot that I was in a foreign country, forgot that I had responsibilities... forgot everything that wasn't the sensation of being held by my husband.

"You are the most amazing person," Victor whispered with his lips still almost touching mine. "I'm lucky, getting to share the rest of my life with you."

I'm the lucky one, I thought. I don't know if I'd even be here to recount this to all of you if it weren't for Victor. I know he'd never take credit for saving me and would probably say I saved myself, but I couldn't have done it without him. I no longer think of repayment, but it's still important to me to show gratitude for everything he's done, and I think the best way I can do that is to appreciate the life he's helped me reclaim and live it to the fullest of my capability.

I stood on tiptoe to kiss him one more time and then, hand in hand, we set out to acquaint ourselves with every detail of our beautiful new home.

[petricakegames]

Devlog: General

Well, I've spent the last several hours smooshing my face against javascript and CSS in Twine trying to get it to do something that seems quite simple and yet it refuses to cooperate--so I'm taking a break to chatter here. The problem is: I know just enough code and syntax to break everything and not enough to fix it 😂

As the above implies, I've started some UI work for a new project! It's been two weeks since the game jam version of "Another Round" got published, and it's gotten some lovely reviews 🥰 and I still love it to bits. (You should play it, if you haven't. Or if you have. I've played it for fun a few times myself) I've been noodling around the edits I want to do--nothing major, some smoothing out, a bit of polish, another round (hah) of typo extermination. I'd like to have the final version done by the end of the year.

I am very new to Twine. I started poking it a year-ish ago but didn't get far beyond the basics of moving between passages. I've been taking it more seriously the last few months and (because I'm a Libra) spent most of my skill points in aesthetics. Designing a pretty UI has been more important than, oh, I don't know, actually making it a game. "Variables? Who needs variables when the vibes are good?"

Me. Turns out, it's me that needs variables.

Since the best way to learn is by playing, the only way to win is by learning and the only way to begin is by beginning, my next project is here to teach! Me..to teach me--I'm not making an educational game.

As part of the Alphabet Superset challenge, every week (ish) for the next six months I'll be posting an update to this game. Each "episode" will vary in length (b/n 500-5000 words) and focus on a theme from the spec fic section of tvtropes.org. Think 90s-era, monster-of-the-week style television with a surprising amount of heart and an unsurprising amount of camp.

You are an agent of [AGENCY NAME REDACTED]--a covert branch of the US Department of the Interior, tasked with the investigation and conservation of paranormal entities, objects and forces found within the United States. Folks, welcome to...

The scope of each "episode" will be small--only a few scenes, typically--which gives me something tangible to work on while I learn how to use Twine better. Six months is a daunting amount of time to commit to this, but my goal is to both grow my Twine skills and establish a supported routine around my creative process so, hey, the time is going to pass anyway. I may as well try, right?

Anyway, that's all for now. First episode will go up next Friday. But I figure it'll take a bit to build some steam. I've got to stop fixating on the damn UI...

okay, I'm gonna take a break and try to smooch a hot tiefling

[academicvalidation4life]

Wednesday, May 22nd

It has been a while! After finals, which ended April 30th, I got into a depressive episode. I attend a very challenging school (when applying to Uni, all classes I take - even regular ones - are considered AP) which takes a lot out of me, emotionally, and physically. I didn't do well in finals and even dropped out of one of my honours classes (targeted for Med school applicants). After that, I just felt like a complete failure. My sister came back from Uni for summer, and she's excelling at everything, she got a 4.0 GPA and is already really inserted into her industry, all in her Freshman Year. I'm so very proud of her! At the same time, it's hard not to compare myself. Right now, I'm trying to focus on the small wins. I got 100% in all the Maths exams (six of them) I took last term! I got the highest grade I've ever gotten in Chem. Slowly, but surely, I'll get there. This week, my goal is not to spend all day rotting in bed, I want to go back to the gym, for both my mental and physical health, and fall back into my studying schedule since midterms have already re-started. I have exactly a month left before break (June/21) which will be very much appreciated! I'll have a month off, and school will return in August, already kicking off with two mocks and two weeks of finals 😅. With good planning, I can still turn it around and do my best for the rest of the year. Currently, I am failing two subjects - which is FAR from ideal, but considering I take 18 classes, it could be much worse. My focus this month is to try and get the best grades possible on the midterms for these subjects (Philosophy and Biology) so I'm a bit less stressed once finals come around. Also, doing well on my mocks can boost my grade by 10%! I have one this Saturday and I am revising as much as I can to have this bonus to fall back on, in case all else fails. Honestly, I have zero motivation, am exhausted, and still completely depressed. The only thing keeping me going is, ironically, my anxiety. Be a failure only now or be a failure forever? I'm doing the best I can (which I am aware is not nearly enough) every day, taking some notes during class and getting my homework done. I'll try and update more often!

[pokefanbri]

I've always been open about this but not by much. I just keep it to myself due to ridicule from friends or family, idk how the public would react. I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia in 2009 when I was 19 years old. My auditory "hallucinations". Would drive anyone mad being that I've been dealing with it for 16 yrs now. It's always been like a quest on just trying to find out where it comes from or who it is, the source of these disembodied voices in my mind. Whether spirits, angels, someone on the other side of the 🌎, or demons cuz they be lurking. And now into my 30s have evolved into visual hallucinations. A mystery that I wanna know too. There is a research facility at the U of A here in Tucson that involves psychic activity research that I would love to check out.

I held it together while dealing with hard challenges in life, it's difficult to cope with. At first the voices were so loud that music with headphones wasn't able to drown it out. But as I grow, & come closer to God, it becomes a gift and easier to control. Since the bad was washed away, it's become a part of me. I have been baptized 3 times in my life so far cuz sometimes being a good girl I slip lol & nobody is perfect. However after each baptism I get this euphoric feeling and I know that I'm surrounded by angels and I feel like the veil has been lifted it's really cool. I believe I'm connected somehow to Him & the angels. But the darkness still lurks around every corner. I feel evil presences I even hear them talking to me but of course I talk back with attitude when I probably shouldn't. Things tapping on my closet door I even imagine being dragged under my bed. I've saved my mom's apartment and it just made things worse for a time. I saw advice from Christian friends and even my pastor and they have told me that when you try to get rid of a demon they just bring more especially when you're not qualified to cleanse.

The more difficult the challenge, the more unhappy I am, the more I want to die. But God has gotten me through a lot, He can get me through it all I know it. But I also know I can't just play into the devil's hands, let his demons win messing with my head & emotions, I know better now

Its a long story, since 09 the bad took over but owned it since discovering my faith. 😈 may still wanna get at me & hate me w/a passion, which is explains my terrible life he must hate my ass. But God's power & light is so much greater, & protected w/the ✝️ on my chest, 😈 can try 😒

" paranoid schizophrenia" by doctors. But I know what I'm hearing. No friends or family ever believes me or wants to hear it, so I suffer in silence. It's just a matter of finding out what it is & the source. I have foresight in precognitive dreams ie Deja Vu since I was 4, Im sure alot of people have that but for me it can be frequent & never make amy sense as its visions of random happenings in my life weeks or months in advance. I have rare visions whilst awake of which God shows me, like when I meditated & spoke to Him before my babtism which I thought was pretty cool. I've been known to have telepathy with others & has been a cool experiment with other spiritual friends, & automatic writing to where the pen writes itself while holding it loosely.

"Schizophrenic" since 09 but Supernatural things happening for quite a while, & just evolving since. I'd get help for this issuse but idk how or where to start, sorta self taught. Doctors just want me to suppress it, but my new doc said if it makes me happy I don't have to.

It is conflicting with my faith cuz I know the Bible says beware of psychics & magicians in the same verse. We aren't supposed to know all mysteries in the universe cuz faith. But what happens when one of those mysteries involves you, wouldn't you wanna know? What if God chose u for something? What if it's a miracle?

And what if it's not exactly psychic activity per se. Cuz all God's children are prophets of the Lord. The signs are happening now of the end of days & the children are seeing visions of the end, I had 1 myself. When you're childlike u inherit the kingdom of heaven. He's warned us plenty of times.

Maybe it's easier than we think. Maybe, it doesn't have to be so complicated. Maybe He's easing us into it & Revelations isn't as horrific as it seemed in the Bible, but did its job into putting the fear of God into me lol. Life's too short, but what do I do with it, where do I go from here? After all the hell I've been through, & I'm still at entry level jobs with just customer service options. What if, more than 1 Angel is here, more than 2 or 3, chillin til it happens, & we live our lives while we can before it's all gone. I've met Gabriel, he's a pretty awesome dude, curly blonde hair, walks with a staff & like his wings are too heavy for him lol. Just doing his thing being the messenger of God, however flawed like us all.

We just don't know. Maybe we'll never know, & even with our faith we still try to peice it all together like a puzzle til it fits, as humans do being naturally curious. My grandpa was a code breaker in the war, I kinda take after him that way. I'm very wise & I do like to decode in a way. We just gotta Believe, be ready for anything & to go home.

How did I start talking about my issuse & gifts, & it ends up becoming Biblical 😂 that always happens I get riled up & the holy spirit kinda just takes over lol. Yo just Believe aight. Trust me, I've experienced miracles myself, He keeps me afloat. Yes I may come off as crazy, but a lot of girls are technically lol

Mark 9:23

Must add we have free will & it shouldn't condemn us regardless of some choices, if God has a purpose for us let it be. Bible tho it's all truth, is outdated, they wrote it from during that time & how they could describe things from that period. Jesus took in misfits like us ✝️

He understands us completely. I don't like to say idolize either regarding celebs, it's adore or is a role model. Cuz of the outdatedness of the Bible I personally just like to focus on the stories of Jesus or Revelations, psalms & Proverbs is good too. He loves us so much ✝️

The start of this post I was crying so hard 😭 like I usually do due to severe depression. But now I'm as light as a feather, now I feel so much better ty God. My past has broken me quite a bit & even my family sucks so much that I pray for a new 1. My name partially means "high" & I wish I has bud rn lol.

Origionally this was on twitter however I realized that it doesn't belong there because it's too long. Made for a blog anyway I have a bad habit of typing too much. I was working on a book & like an idiot I lost all my things in Vegas including my flash drive with my life story on it, that's not finished yet. But I knew I still had it on my laptop at home. Vegas would make for some good chapters lol gotta get around to writing again.

[enby-trainer]

Poke Ball - If you have pokémon what kind of poke balls are they kept in?

Ordinary red/white balls with custom stickers of their names on 'em. I oughta decorate them more but I can't settle on a good way to do it.

Great Ball - Is there anything your pokémon are especially great at? Like tricks or moves?

Delphine's fave move is Play Rough, at least, I'm guessing it is since she uses it so often, and she's pretty good at it in my opinion. Meanwhile Nox's seems to be Power Gem? Also for the same reason.

Ultra Ball - How easy is it to bathe and groom your pokémon? What is needed to do so?

Usually the gals just clean themselves easily enough. They dislike getting dirty. Never needed to give either of 'em a bath.

Luxury Ball - What is one luxury you tend to take for granted or use to take for granted?

I used to tend to order DoorDash meals when I was too lazy to cook. And then one month I basically went broke because of my lack of self-control and sense. So, no more of that!

Heal Ball - Do you have any scars or injuries? How did you get them?

All the old cuts I got as a child from the multiple meowth my parents had growing up have healed and faded since then. Not all of those meowth liked children, y'know? And I was an annoying kid, always grabby-hands. Thankfully neither of my gals have ever seriously got me. Unrelated to pokemon, I got a fracture in one of my arms as a child when another kid pushed me off the monkey bars. Had to wear a cast.

Love Ball - Is there anyone you care deeply for? It can be romantic, platonic, or familial love.

My mom, for one. She wasn't perfect and still has her flaws to this day, but she loves me in the end and just wants me to be happy.

Friend Ball - Do you have any close friends? How did you meet them?

I don't really have any friends outside of my family, unfortunately. It's kind of lonely. One of the reasons I made this blog was so I could make new friends in the pokemon-owning community.

Repeat Ball - What is one thing that you could do over and over and never get tired of?

Eat! Sleep? Lol. I'm not very interesting. Well...if I could experience the feeling of winning a battle with your 'mon over and over again, that would probably be it. It's one of the few things in my life that make me feel like I know what I'm doing and I'm not a failure of a person. Which makes it suck even more when I lose.

Cherish Ball - What memory are you most fond of?

When Nox and Delphine were kittens, though Delphine was grown by the time Nox came into the picture. I hold those times near and dear to my heart.

Premier Ball - Are there any special events that you’re looking forward to in the future? If the event has already happened, what was it?

I plan to challenge a Unovan gym eventually! I just, uh, am indecisive...

Safari Ball - Have you been on any adventures? What were they?

Outside of New Tork? Not really. I've never left this city my whole life. I think I've got to change that...

Dusk Ball - Do you prefer the day or the night? Dawn or dusk?

I am a morning person.

Dream Ball - Do you have a dream? Or have you already achieved it?

I want to be a real, traveling pokemon trainer, I think. I've been stalling because I'm hesitant to give up everything I've gotten so far -- my job, my apartment. Being a professional trainer isn't easy, as far as I've observed...do you think I'm making up excuses? I'm not sure what I'm doing. All I know is sometime soon I need to try.

Heavy Ball - What is the biggest pokémon you own? What is the biggest Pokémon you are willing to own?

Both of my gals are averagely sized for Kantonian persian and both are about the same size as one another.

Strange Ball - What is the strangest thing you’ve seen or have heard about?

Why do scientists insist on making unethical hybrids like arctozolt and dracozolt? The poor things.

Park Ball - Do you take your pokémon out to fun places such as the park or the beach?

I take my 2 persian out to local parks as often as I can. Also on general walks.

Moon Ball - If you have pokémon that have evolved how did it happen? If they haven’t yet evolved do you or your pokémon ever plan on doing it?

If Nox and Delphine ever felt like they wanted to evolve before they did, they never let me know. I get the feeling neither of them expected to evolve either. For Delphine, it happened about half a year before Nox evolved. IIRC, meowth-Delphine was eating her daily dinner when suddenly she began to glow and change in shape. Nox, we were outside on a walk. I didn't expect any of it. They were both still pretty young, and to be honest they are still young now. Does this mean I'm a decent trainer? I hope so.

Quick Ball - Do you tend to take your time with things or do you have a ‘go go go’ attitude?

I am contradictory. Sometimes I have a go-go-go let's get this done right now kinda attitude, and then with other things I procrastinate badly.

Sports Ball - Have you participated in any competitions? Like pokémon contests or battle tournaments?

Not yet but we will. I am 26 and we've still got our whole life ahead of us. Don't remind me how some people start out at age 10 and still become champions...it makes me feel depressed about my progress.

Nest Ball - How old was your youngest pokémon when you got them?

Nox is the youngest, and she was practically a baby when I got her. Delphine was more of a teen.

[jillianfahey]

Evil Donnies Love Interest

This starts when they are both nineteen. So they are adults!

Okay, I have seen a few things for an evil ROTTMNT Donnie called Adams Donnie where he has prolonged living experiments. AKA kidnapping beings like a Salamander Yoki and keeping them captive to do experiments on. So I was thinking, who could possibly attract someone more interested in cutting open everyone around them than in "normal" activities.

So I thought that Mercury (I have this character as she/her because its more fun for her to hunt things down than worry about sexuality and she was born female)would be someone who did not care whatsoever about life either. And by giving her the occupation of a bounty hunter is a perfect outlet for it. So she meets Donnie by getting a job to capture some of his escaped experiments (Ralph no longer has alone time privileges with the experiments).

So Mercury grabs the escaped experiments and drafts them back to Donnies lab a quarter of the time he set aside for that. Putting them in their cages she turned to where he was sitting at his desk. Noticing that he was testing nerves of a different long term experiment she grabbed the tool he was holding, "That's not the sweet spot." And then stabs directly into a hidden nerve center behind a elbow joint.

After the experiment on the table screamed for almost a minute she pulled out the tool and handed it to him. Over the muffled sobbing he asked, "Who are you?"

She grinned fiercely, "I'm A bounty hunter." Cutting herself with a knife she swabbed the spot and put it down. "I'll be back for my payment this time tomorrow." With a challenging glint, "Lets see what you found out in the meantime."

Latter that day when Donnie was wrapping up his planned experiment time he saw the swab with blood and remembered her challenge. Picking up the swab he went to his computer. He had to astound her.

The next day Donnie had Mercury's name, number, adress, and almost a full life history. She gave him a smile, "Very good Donatello." Patting the box next to her, "You win the prize."

Inside the box was a Hare Yoki, one of the very few Hooks that Donnie had no data on. Even better, "She's pregnant."

It was a statement, not a question. Mercury nodded, "Due in five months." With a fierce grin, "So even if you kill her the experiments will continue."

This was all Donnie ever wanted. Someone to give him the best experiment. And Mercury had provided INE with the perfect conditions.

A question was out of Donnies mouth before he could stop it, "Would you like to check in tomorrow?" Looking at his newest toy, " And see how far I've gotten?"

The glint was back in Mercury's eyes, "Yes, I'd love to." Then looking around, "Same time?"

Donnie nodded, "Same time". With that Mercury left and Donnie was alone with his experiments again.

As the clip shows he would realize his attraction to a person. More that they were useful for certain thing. Maybe even helping him see the vulnerable spots in the experiments.

So when Leo added Mercury to the list of people he was stalking, the blue turtle was surprised at how adamant his twin was. Donnie saw Mercury as his, no one else's.

Mercury would occasionally bring another experiment for Donnie. Whether they were long term like the rabbit or short term like a Guinea Pig he loved each one.

They were happy this way for close to a year. Until one day they were seeing how an experiment was decomposing and another one tried to escape. Mercury slashed off its arm in a quick motion.

Luckily or unlucky that Yoki healed itself automatically, but an arm took a while to grow back. While it was shocked the pair watching reinforced the cage and monitored the regrowth.

When it was an hour later and the limb was grown back they cleaned the blood off of the lab floor. Making sure to keep some in vials for Donnie to test the different stages of growth.

With the floor cleaned Donnie saw that there were still blood splatters on Mercury's face and started to clean them off. The next thing they knew the cloth had been dropped and the pair, bounty hunter and scientist, were making out.

The first time it did not make it to the cot in the lab, but it marked a change. They were silently more if a couple with Mercury in the lab and Lair more. At the end of the second year ahe had nearly moved into his room. Upon Splinters insistence they got married before Mercury officially moved into the Lair and Donnies room became A co-occupied space.

As for Donnie and Mercury as a couple...

They would almost be the perfect couple with always supporting each others interests and enjoying seeing the other happy. They genuinely enjoy time together, but also have time apart with their own interests that they tell each other about.

The problem, they have dark interests. Donnie kidnaps people to hold hostage and experiment on. And Mercury loves the levels of the hunt these human level minds give her. Sometimes they let one of the experiments run just so she can run them down when hunts are not as fun.

So great as a couple. But terrible people.

[onlyseokmins]

losers • l.c.

Pairing: lee chan x afab!reader Genres: smut (minors dni!), roommate!au, kinda have a hate-love relationship so they're losers (affectionate) Warnings: uh they're both kinda switches ig, marking, dirty talk, swearing, mentions of masturbation, chan's a pervert lbr, cum-tasting kinda, panty-stuffing (??) god idk i'm sorry lmk if i missed smth 😭 WC: again like 2k A/N: this is personally the dirtiest thing I've ever written bc I'm weak but got infected by chanrot somehow anyways I apologize ahead of time for this, planning my retirement and never talking to anyone ever again

Chan's fucking into you hard and fast, too far gone in this thrilling fantasy-turned-reality to have the patience in being gentle. Your legs are wrapped around his dancer hips that have a crazy rhythm and mind of their own. Head against the wall, left hand grasping his bicep and right fingers curling into the tiny hairs on the nape of his neck, you know you'll have bruises from the wall you're being pushed up and fucked against. 

You'll have marks in other places you reason, and so will Chan, half-closed eyes wandering over the purple spots dotting his neck to compliment your own. It's not like he listened when you demanded he picks up his musty socks laying around the apartment so you can't even pretend to be surprised when the bastard harshly sucked the skin on your neck despite your protests. 

He's muttering all kinds of dirty shit in your ear. Gloating at how your cunt betrays you and tightens around his length even as you hold out from moaning aloud. So, he keeps at it in hopes that you'll end up giving him what he wants because somehow, he likes to think he always gets his way. 

"C'mon, you had no problems trying to be quiet earlier." 

"... Shut up." 

"What, don't tell me you're embarrassed?" He pauses, hips pressed up firmly against your own, cock nestled fully within. "Now? After being so shameless?" 

Come to think of it, you've always been shameless. Sauntering around in those tight tanks and tiny shorts. Pressing your tits up against him while he's gaming with the boys to see what tactics you can use to beat him next one-on-one match. Cooing over how big his arm muscles have gotten in the last month when he's doing dishes. The challenging glint in your eyes when you try to get under his skin as you bitch about the disgusting laundry he leaves laying around. Using his body wash so you smell just like you belong to him when you reach over to grab the remote. 

But the breaking point is when you casually walk past at breakfast with one of his shirts in hand, which he doesn't recognize at the moment. It takes rummaging in the drawers looking for something to wear to his afternoon dance practice until the realization dawns. The familiar color in your grasp this morning was the last clean t-shirt since the idiot still hadn't done his laundry for the week. 

He can't fathom why you'd take an article of his clothing, let alone the only one in his drawers unless you were just trying to be an annoying brat. Again. As usual. So, he marches down the hallway to your room — shirtless in the effort to try and stun, fluster, or win you over in the event of an argument (but originally innocent because he was in the middle of changing) — knuckles poised to rap on your closed door when he hears it. 

He pauses. Thinks he's imagining things. You're always noisy in your room — either talking to your friends, yourself, watching videos, listening to music, or playing games. But then, he hears it again.

Louder.

A moan. 

Accompanied by the telltale sign of faint vibrating noises. 

He shuffles his feet back awkwardly and clears his throat. Technically, it's not the first time he's accidentally heard one of your… self-care sessions. He's sure you've heard his own. Chan has no intentions of rudely intruding on your private time, figuring he'll just… wait... and kill time back in the safety of his bedroom.

But you keep making your pretty sounds like you know, volume increasing even as he backs away slowly. Eyebrows furrowing as he tries to shake away the perverse image that threatens to form in his mind. One he's thought about before. Many times. Many positions. Many places. 

Chan rubs his temples. You're going to be the death of him. Because now you're begging. 

"Please, please, please!"

For something. 

"I need it, baby… "

Someone. 

"Ugh!"

To fill you up. Stretch you out. Properly. 

He's ready to bolt away before it gets too dangerous. Because he knows he'd be more than willing to open that door and easily give it to you. What you really need to feel good. His jaw clenches as his cock twitches. But that's never going to happen. You're good roommates. Friends even. Too pretty for your own good, too mischievous it can be annoying. But he'll never cross those unspoken boundaries and continues to keep his desires limited in his bedroom, his imagination, and to himself.

Until you say it.

Moaning so loudly you're practically screaming at this point, he can't help but hear it.

His name. 

Breathlessly.

"Channie…"

FUCK. 

He's frozen solid but the blood is rushing up his neck to his cheeks and simultaneously down to his dick. Mouth open in a silent gasp and groan. Brain short-circuiting as he finally just indulges in what he's already thought about millions of times before, so what's the point? He wonders if you're cumming as you chant his name over and over again like a mantra.

And then your door flies open and he swears out loud.

If he wasn't hard before, he sure is now. Your breasts are spilling out of his extra-large shirt he prefers to dance in because of how free-fitting they are as your chest heaves from the prior activities. Sweat makes all the bare skin he can see glisten and he grunts at the sheen of slick coating your inner thighs.

You eye the tent that's poorly hidden by his gray sweatpants, his abs taut with whatever flurry fuck of emotions he's reeling with. And you smirk like the little vixen you are and raise your eyebrows.

"You gonna just stand there?"

Chan doesn't need asked twice and you let out a squeal as he slams you against the wall. Lips aggressively move against yours as you both try to fight for dominance. He doesn't even need to prep you as he takes out his already aching cock. Warm and so incredibly wet, your dripping cunt still manages to grip around him tightly as he pushes in.

As much as he likes messily kissing you, he pulls back, catching your lips between his teeth. Even though your eyes are lidded, there's a distinct spark in them behind the lust that drives him crazy. You're testing him as you stay suddenly very quiet. Like he's not doing enough. As if his dick isn't doing it for you.

Daring to be ever so shameless even in the state the two of you are entangled in. He's so down bad for you, he thinks it's adorable plus the fact that he's finally balls-deep in you.

"Can't believe you've been getting off to the thought of me. Cute." And you have the audacity to roll your eyes, thinking what's cute about this? "How often have you cum wishing it was me fingering you?"

You keep up your silence, knowing it's aggravating him. Full knowledge that he'll want to keep pounding into you even though he stopped in the attempt to make you crack. As if.

"You're such a brat," he grits his teeth. "Even though wearing my shirt while you bounce on that pathetic little vibrator only helps your dirty little fantasy?"

Your eyes close briefly as your cunt traitorously clenches around him. And he laughs mockingly. Until your eyes fly back open.

"I dunno, you tell me how it feels stealing shit to jerk off to," your voice is low at how fucked out you actually are but it's the devious tone that makes him gulp as you purr, "Channie."

He pauses for real. Because now he knows that you know.

It's not like it really matters because of the situation you're now in. But he had tried to be extremely subtle about it and honestly, you had questioned yourself at first. It happened so infrequently enough, your roommate hardly hinting at what a horny pervert he actually was that you figured you were just overly paranoid.

There was no fucking way Lee Chan was stealing your panties.

You now stare into his eyes boldly, seeing the frantic panic as his mouth opens and closes. His dick twitches and you snort. 

"Fuckin' horndog." Your fingers trail down his pecs to his torso to right above where you're connected. "So, tell me. Which ones were your favorite, baby?"

His mind goes back to how you said it as you masturbated and he's completely sure he's smooth-brained at this point. Cheeks hot and the placement of your hand practically scorching, he lets out a throaty whine as you begin to circle the base of his dick that doesn't quite fit in you.

"That's not an answer, baby boy."

And that's when he snaps. And decides to give you an answer. 

A proper one.

It's like a flip switches. It's so fast you don't even register what the fuck happens.

Because suddenly, your arms are pinned above your head. He's leering at your wide eyes at the unanticipated fullness of your mouth and Chan thinks he might like it better when you're quiet instead. Sadly, it's not his cock in his mouth but it'll work. Since you're suddenly rolling your eyes back (this time in deliriousness) because he has indeed, clearly given you his answer.

You're familiar with the lacy lilac panties in your mouth — ironically one of your favorite pairs as well. But god, even if you're slightly pissed to be gagged, it's the undeniable saltiness on them that has you letting out your first full moan for him. Even if it's slightly muffled.

And Chan switches gears to let you know exactly what he likes about them.

"It's a shame they were just cleaned, isn't it? Came in them four times, imagining it was your pretty pussy instead. 'Cause I bet these hug your ass just right…" It's his turn to moan, this time your name as he starts pistoning into you again. "But now I don't have to imagine, huh? Bet you'll wear 'em for me."

Despite the fact that you're getting the best fuck of your life and by none other than the guy you've been crushing on since you first saw him passionately dancing on the stage before you even became roommates, he's still a loser and he still stole your goddamn panties. He may be the best masturbation material but he can be annoying and you like to fight him more than anything. 

The minute Chan gets a little too lost in how he might cum too fast if he's not careful and loosens the grip on your wrists, you've broken out of his grasp. Taking the opportunity of him gasping as you push him down, you shove the panties in his mouth and he's on his back before he knows it. It's kind of unfair how you take control again with a smug look on your face but this time he willingly surrenders because the sinful way you bounce on top of him is enough for anyone to forgive you. 

He also surrenders to his oncoming orgasm, probably cumming the hardest in his entire life, weakly rubbing your clit with one hand and the breast hanging out of his shirt with the other as you milk him for all he's worth during your followed eruption of pleasure.

Gasping and laying in the middle of the stupid hallway, the two of you just stay cuddling that way for a while. Letting the beats of silence pass until someone has to break it.

"So, what happens now?"

"You return all my panties."

"What?"

"Seriously, Chan! How many do you even have?"

"Not enough?"

"Pervert," you grumble as he pouts but you're not actually mad.

"At least let me keep these ones, I mean, you put them in my mouth so they kind of have to be mine now."

"You put them in my mouth first! And they're originally mine!" He clutches his head and you sigh. "… I'll let you fuck me whenever you want, instead."

"For real? No take-backs?"

You start to wonder if you'll regret this offer but at the same time, how could you? Lee Chan may be a loser but his dick game was one-hundred percent a winner.

"No take-backs," you agree slowly, "but only if you promise to like, actually pick up and do your laundry. And I swear to god if I find my panties missing… "

He shouldn't be smiling as wide as he is, but Chan abruptly pulls you into a kiss that's startlingly soft, dare you say loving even. He knows it's a compromise he's willing to make because, in the end, he no longer has to hide and rely on his imagination in his lonely bedroom with the real deal in his arms now.

onlyseokmins: 2022 Losers ©

[houdinicorbini]

Ardyn and his pregnant s/o in a AU where he’s not supposed to die at the end <3 Maybe a scenario ? (Dw do whatever you want !!)

Thanks for the request and I hope you are doing well! And in this he doesn't kill Lunafreya, but he does wound her. You were able to melt his heart before that Tw: none A life like this was something Ardyn could only obtain in his dreams. A life where he could fall in love again and leave his past completely behind.

No longer was he bent on getting revenge, nor was he hurting innocent people to get what he wanted. Ardyn now had a new goal in life, and that was to take care of you.

Though Ardyn is very lucky to be able to enjoy this new life in the first place. The number of hoops he had to go through to get the Noctis and the people of Lucis off of his back.

Ardyn even considered having the two of you move far far away so no one could dare bother you while the rest of your days was spent with one another.

You were able to convince and reassure him that everything was going to be fine and there was no need to run. In a way you were kind of put in charge of him. Which is something you still find humorous.

They were talking about locking Ardyn up, but you were the one who still saw something good in there, something worth trying to save, and to this day. There are no amount of words to describe how incredibly grateful he is for that.

But skipping all that of how he got to have this amazing new life with you, Ardyn has now reached a new goal that he never once thought about nor had considered.

"Darling, you needn't have to make dinner, I told you that I have everything covered." Your husband of three years was trying to convince you, his 7-month-old pregnant partner, to not make dinner and actually get some rest.

Not something he would think of as challenging but here the two of you are, proving him wrong.

"I've already gotten so much done so there's no harm finishing it up." You looked up at him and flashed a playful smile. "I can let you take it out of the oven when it's done if you really want to help."

The urge to pick you up and lay you down on the couch so you can get some damn rest was rising, but you were able to get a chuckle out of him with your playful banter.

Getting closer to you, he continued with trying to persuade you to relax. "I think you've done more than enough and-"

"I love how much you care but I'm fine, really." You were trying to assure him that you could still do things no matter how pregnant you were.

Though the bun in the oven had other plans when you felt a sharp kick to the stomach, sharp enough to make you slightly hunch over. "Ignore that, I'm fine."

"I'd like to say otherwise." His tone was calm, but he felt his heart drop into his stomach when he saw you hunch over, albeit slightly.

Standing back up you sighed and without looking at him you said "Fine, you win."

You went to walk over to the couch, but you were swooped off of your feet. "Then taking you over myself will be my prize."

"I can't get hurt just walking to the couch." You huffed and crossed your arms, but he could tell you were only joking.

"I wouldn't be surprised if you somehow hurt yourself popping bubble wrap."

"Now that's just mean."

After having another laugh, Ardyn made sure you were comfortable on the couch before finishing the rest of dinner. He made sure to give you a decent sized portion since you were eating for two.

You made sure to give him your praise for helping even when you wouldn't let him, which led to you crying. Hormones are definitely fun. Ardyn refused to take any credit since he did that because he cares.

After dinner was done and the dishes were up, you and Ardyn were laying on the couch together. Your back resting on a pillow against the arm rest, Ardyn's arms protectively wrapped around you while his head was oh so gently placed on your stomach.

Running your hands through his soft, wine-colored hair as you could feel yourself slowly drifting off into the world of sleep.

Here and there you could feel the softest of kisses being placed on your belly. You could even hear him talking in the sweetest voice to your unborn child.

You could tell from just this that he was going to be a great father, that he was going to do his best for both you and the baby, not that there was ever any doubt.

"I'm so lucky to have someone like you in my life, and I'm even luckier to call you my husband the father of my child." You felt overwhelmed with happiness so you couldn't but convey those emotions into words.

"I believe it is I who is actually lucky," He paused so he could place one more kiss upon your stomach. 'For having someone who never left my side when I was at my worst, and for that, I thank you."

You could feel tears threatening to spill as you spoke. "Oh, how I love you."

A smile graced your husband's lips as he unwrapped his arms so he could get closer to place a kiss upon those lips he loves so much.

"And I you." I did not mean to take so long to post this! But I hope it was worth it and that you enjoy it!

[1a-imagines]

Forget me not

Fairy!Izuku x reader

A/n: It’s here!! The post I've been making every one worry about for the past week, I hope you all enjoy. :) 

This is Day 3 of the Izumonth collab!! You can find the announcement post here. 

If you squint there is angst.

Word count: 5500+ words.

Overview: You've waited years for him to come back, when you find him again; what secrets will you share under the moonlit sky?

Laughter echoed in the open air, the sun peeking up over the horizon signalling the start of morning. Most of the world was asleep, but this back garden was as lively as ever. Little feet raced around the garden with purpose. A child, no older than 10, chased a ball of green light around the grassy terrain.

You jumped over toys, crawled under the slide, hid behind trees and bushes to trick your opponent into a false sense of security. Anything to win this game he had challenged you to.

You stood as still as you could from behind the tree trunk, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike. Finally, a green glow entered your peripheral vision and you jumped for it.

Your chubby fingers outstretched, both hands clasping around the light as you captured the target.

"Gotcha Izu'!" You laughed, opening your hands as you brought them up to your face. The glow from his wings bounced off your skin, accentuating your cute, childish, features.

The fairy rubbed his head sitting in the middle of your palms, giggling,  "I was going easy on you!"

He flew up, getting level with your face. You hummed in a mocking tone, not believing him. He pressed his lips together, a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. "Well, if that was so easy for you then how about you try catching all of us!" He exclaimed.

More glowing lights emerged from beyond the bushes in your garden. Each one a different colour, red, blue, yellow, white. Only when they got up close could you see the outlines of their bodies. You had expected fairies to be smaller than they were. They were about the size of your palms and according to them, they were still growing. You wonder how they would compare to you when you got older.

You huffed, stomping your foot on the floor with a pout. "Fine! I'll do it! But after we're paying hide and seek, ok? We only have one hour until my family wakes up!"  

Izuku nodded, flying over to his friends with a grin. "I promise! Now come catch us!"

You smiled at the memory. Remembering how that night was filled with laughter and games. Even as a ten year old staying awake all night, you never got sleepy. Whenever the moon was up, you and your friends went out to play. It was the only time they came to visit you. All night you would be awake, laughing, singing and playing with them in your secret garden.

It surprised you, the memory was so vivid in your mind, like it had happened merely a day ago. As time went by, childhood memories started to fade, making them feel more like dreams than reality.

You bent down, your eye peering through the door of the little mushroom house. Just as you had expected, it was empty. You sat back on your knees, letting out a hefty sigh.

The handcrafted house brought back so many childhood memories. Memories that in one way made you happy, and in another way stung your heart like a thousand wasps.

You used to see the fairies everyday, hiding around your garden, in bushes, behind mushrooms. They particularly liked your flower beds and vegetable patches. It was where you often found them sneaking around, as if playing a never ending game of hide and seek.

Eventually, they approach you, and they become your mystical secrets. There was one in particular, your little forest haired fairy. Even before you became friends he would smile and wave at you from behind flowers and leaves.

He was too shy to talk to you at first but with time he made his way to you. His friends soon followed his suit and began talking and playing with you. As much as you adored all of them, there was just something about Izuku that made you feel more attached to him. He came to visit you almost every night, sometimes flying through your bedroom window, where you would read him stories or vise versa, until you fell asleep.

There were so many fond memories he had left you with.

You reached out a hand, caressing the petals of a nearby snowdrop, more memories flashing through your mind.  

They always adored your garden, how it was filled with different flowers and vegetables. In honour of them you continued to upkeep it. Never a day went by that you weren't in your garden, pulling out weeds, watering the colourful array of flowers, tending the vegetable patches. You wished to create the perfect human-made fairy garden in the world, for them to come play and relax, laugh and dance just as you used to in your childhood days. You even went as far as making houses for them, each one filled with miniature furniture you had hand crafted yourself.

You had dedicated so much time to them. Put your heart and soul into everything you made, not a leaf out of place in your perfect garden.

So why haven't they come back? It has been six years and you haven't received so much as a goodbye from them. They just stopped coming to see you.

Your family had always brushed off your claims of fairies visiting the garden as just your childish imagination running wild, but you were much older now. Your obsession was starting to worry them. You mother thought it was nice you had such a big imagination, the rest of them called you crazy and childish.

Despite their words, you couldn't bring yourself to believe that it was all just mere imagination. They were real, you talked to them, you played and danced with them, and you were going to prove them all wrong!

Your beliefs had stood strong for six whole years, but after reciting the same old routine of tending your fairy garden and checking the small mushroom houses, everyday single day. Your beliefs were dwindling.

Where had they gone? The more days that went by, days without signs of your magical friends, days that consisted of you being mocked and ridiculed by your family. You couldn't help but lose a little faith. Fears starting to invade the cracks left in your heart, fears of never seeing them again, fears of them never having existed in the first place.

Despite the ever growing shadow on your face, you continued your weekly routine of cleaning the mushroom houses. Even if they never came back, it would be a waste to let all your hard work catch dust. You couldn't even begin to guess how many hours you had spent on this project.

You grabbed a cloth and unclipped the roof from the walls so you could clean all the nooks and crannies, Beginning with the first house you had ever crafted. It was rounded like a fat mushroom, the roof was a dark green with lighter green polka dots decorating it. It was your favourite design, Made carefully and with a little green haired friend of yours in mind.  

It had taken you months to finish this house alone, your face scrunched up remembering all the cuts, bruises and burns you had gotten in the process. It hadn't been easy, and a few times you almost gave up completely. However, seeing the fairy-sized bed, with small sewn duvets on top of it, an actual working fireplace, a kitchen with running water and a stove. It was all worth it. Who else could say they had tiny, fully functional, homes in their back garden?

You wrapped the cloth around your index finger, it was slightly damp, you used it to clean the floor first. Removing some of the furniture so it would be out of your way.

You picked up the couch, but once it was out of the way you noticed the floor was shining. Not from your careful cleaning but it looked like tiny green glitter had fallen to the ground.

Your heart stopped.

Tiny green glitter? Could it be? You used your finger to poke at the glitter, it clung to your skin and you brought it up to your eyes. How could something so small feel so familiar? They were like tiny green sparkles of hope.

Had he been here recently?

Your head shot up and you looked around for any more signs of life, rummaging through the other houses, the flower beds, the vegetable patches, anything you could think of.

As usual, you didn't find anything, yet you stood, grinning from ear to ear at the thought of not being crazy after all. Maybe they had been coming back and you hadn't noticed!?

You placed all the furniture back and put the roof on top of the house. If he had been coming back, then you had to find him! Just like when you were younger, you were going to play a game of hide and seek, but this time you were serious.

You were going to prove to everyone that you weren't crazy. You were going to prove that fairies are real! Most importantly, you might get to see your old friends again!

That very night you sat, curled up, by the window. The log fire offered a dim glow across the room, you didn’t want the lights to be on, fearing it could dissuade them from coming back. You draped a blanket over your shoulders, watching the mushroom house, your eyes not daring to move away in fear you would miss something.

Your family had tried to talk you out of this, telling you it was unhealthy to be so obsessed over this after you shared your findings over dinner. You still remembered the twisted frowns on their faces, even your mother looked worried for you. You sighed, head dipping down. Maybe they had a point, but after dedicating years to these fairies how could you just give up on them? Especially not now that you had a sign of their existence.

Hours went by, the log fire burning out along your hope, leaving behind nothing but a pile of  blackened ash.

The moon was high into the sky, illuminating your garden. It looked exactly like it used to when you would stay away with the fairies all night. Except now, instead of toys, there were more vegetable patches and flower beds scattering the grass floor. As you looked out at it, ghosted memories flooded back to you. You could almost see your childhood self running around with them again.

You felt your eyes droop. What time was it? You weren't sure, all you could do was battle with your body for the ability to stay awake.

Your head was snug in the crease of your arm, the blanket falling from your shoulder. When the blanket finally fell off and hit your feet, it startled you awake. You gasped, your body jolting up as you slapped yourself awake. How could you almost doze off?! What if you had missed something!? You pulled the blanket back around you and leaned onto the window. The cold glass against your skin made you shiver, but it helped keep you awake.

The moon disappeared above your house, but your garden stayed illuminated by its light. It looked enchanting, like there was a spotlight on your garden and the audience was the universe. Through the beam of light your eyes caught sight of something, you rubbed your eye, wondering if it was just your imagination.

You gasped, diving behind the couch, your eyes the only part of you peeking out behind your cover, like an animal waiting to pounce on its prey. A trail of green dust danced in the wind, enticing you to follow it. You shot up from your seat and walked to the back door, as you pulled it open you prayed it wouldn’t creak too loudly and alert your visitor. You bit your lip, creating a gap just big enough for you to slip out of and walked across the garden, the grass tickling at your bare feet.

Your eyes widened, seeing the lights in the house on, you knelt down. Your legs were shaking so you steadied yourself with your hands. The door was shut, you knew this was your only chance to know the truth, to prove you weren’t crazy, and if it really was him, you could finally get some answers as to why he left. your hands were shaking as you were overcome with emotion, you hesitated to move, what if the answers weren’t going to be what you were looking for. Ignorance is bliss as they say.

You sat there, unmoving, knees tucked under your body and the chill of the night air caressing your skin. You could hear the sounds of pot’s clanking from behind the door. Had you any courage you would have peered in already, but your anxieties were holding you back.

After taking a shaky breath and mentally hyping yourself up, you curled your index finger, it hovered above the doors surface as you pushed against an invisible barrier. You closed your eyes and knocked on the door. Everything went silent. The feeling of wanting to slap yourself grew as the seconds ticked by and not a movement was made. The pit of your stomach churned, it felt like you had been sat there for an eternity.

Much to your delight, the door was pulled open and out poked a familiar face. “Izu..” You breathed out, tears pricking at your eyes. You hand flew up to your mouth as you choked back a sob. He hadn’t changed much, he was bigger now, but still only around the size of your palm. His jade curls fell around his face, sticking up in all directions as if he had just rolled out of bed, his rounded eyes filled with inner conflict. The door wasn’t opened fully but you could still see his wings peeking out from behind him, glowing brighter than ever.. Leaves were sewn together to create clothes on his body. A creative yet uncomfortable way to avoid nudity. His eyes were staring up at you like you were a three headed monster, come to end his life. He was frozen in place.

Your lips parted, words threatened to spill from them. You weren’t sure what to say, you had thought about this moment so many times, about what you would say, and yet your mind was blank. As you wrecked your brain to form a sentence a slam brought you from your thoughts. You blinked, the door was shut before you even got to say anything. It felt like a giant slap to your face. After years of imagining the moment you would see your friends again, this was never an outcome you expected. Your hands slipped from your face, trembling in front of you.

You didn’t understand, didn’t he remember you? You still lived in the same house, your looks hadn't changed that much apart from getting taller and your chubby child features melting away, you were practically the same! Maybe he hated you? Maybe that's why he stayed away from you all these years. Thoughts swirled around your head like a whirlpool, your bottom lip quivered, tears rolling down your face.

No matter how much you were hurting, you were insistent on having a conversation with him. You finally had him back, the least he could do was give you some answers. You lifted your hand to knock again, but before your finger could tap on the wood it opened, revealing a much more bashful looking fairy than before. Instead of his usual green glow, he was now glowing pink. How strange...

“Sorry, I panicked.” He chose to look at his feet instead of your face, he couldn’t see. You let out a dry laugh, you tried to relax now he was in front of you again, but you could barely hold back the sobs. “Do you remember me?”

He nodded, his curls bouncing as he did so. You released a breath you didn’t know you were holding. It felt like a dream but you knew it was real. The cold night air on your exposed skin, the sound of his voice as he admitted to panicking; Not even your imagination could be this vivid, he was here, in front of you.

“How could I ever forget you Y/n?” He rubbed his arm, holding himself for comfort. The blanket fell from your shoulders when your body finally relaxed. “You are real.” you breathed, gaze fixed on him.

Your outspoken confirmation had sent yet another slap to your face. You felt like you were being thrown into a frenzy. You swirling thoughts were making you dizzy. They were real, if your family could see him they would finally believe you! All those jokes about you being crazy would be put to an end! You’d be free from ridicule! All you would have to do is take him inside, “I- I have to show you to my family! They think i'm insane! But you’re real! You were all real, and-” You shot up from the ground, stumbling in the process from the erratic movement. “Please! You have to come with me-”

“No!” He panicked and flew up from the stone steps on the mushroom house to be face level with you. It had been so long since you were able to see him up close. “No one can know about us!”

“But-” You wanted to argue but one look in his eyes and you saw how scared he was. You looked down, biting your tongue from saying anything else. His eyes had always reminded you of the forest on a sunny day, peaceful, filled with warmth. So seeing them filled with sorrow had, theoretically, stabbed your heart. “Why did you show yourselves to me then?”

He expected you’d have many questions.. He sighed and slowly fluttered forward so he was closer to your face. It felt like you two were in your own personal bubble, the rest of the world trapped outside of your secret space.

“When we were children, my friends and I found you playing alone in your garden. Our parents never found out about it, we were interested in humans and didn’t see the harm in approaching you. We watched you for weeks, you were always alone but you seemed so nice. We were only going to do it once but, eventually, one day turned into everyday but what we did was stupid and very forbidden by our people. We had to stop before our parents found out if they had, they would have erased your memory using their magic. I didn’t-.. We didn’t want you to forget us.” He corrected, mentally kicking himself for the slip up

You hadn’t caught his slip up, your brain was trying to process the new information. At least you finally had the answers you had been looking for. It finally made sense, but that didn’t make it hurt any less.

You sat back down on the grass, pulling your legs to your chest. They felt like jelly, and you didn’t trust them to support the rest of your body right now. Izuku flew down with you, hovering just above your legs. He took the break of silence to study your features. You looked a lot more mature now, as he assumed he did to you. You were both only 10 last time he saw you, now it had been about 6 years, a lot had changed yet you were still just as beautiful as he remembered you to be.

You remained silent, did you really have nothing to say to him? Or perhaps you were mad? The look on your face said otherwise, your features were relaxed yet your eyes seemed so distant. As if you were in another world to his. You weren’t sure how to feel, you had more questions now than ever before.

“Did you make these?” He finally found a way to break the silence, he gracefully glided down to the mushroom houses you had hidden amongst the blooming flowers. It was the perfect height for him, which was surprising. It was a beautifully designed house, he noted all the little details you had, each carved design was a pattern of passion. The fact you placed them into your flower beds made it even more perfect, it kept them surrounded by nature and beauty just like fairies loved to be. He wasn’t sure how you were able to know all of this, but it was the perfect fairy home, he really wished he would stay and live here in your garden. Not only for the beautiful environment you had created for them, but to see you everyday, to play and dance just like you used to do.

Your head lifted, a smile gracing your lips. “Yeah, I made them for you guys in case you ever came back.”

Your words struck him through the heart without the intent. He was facing away, his hand placed onto the frame of the door, caressing the hand carved design. He was guilt ridden, he had been for years but seeing this, how you waited for them to come back, it tore him up inside. He knew he should’ve said something before leaving you, he really tried to. His friends convinced him that he should be the one to deliver the message, you two had always had this unspoken bond as children.

However, when the time came, he couldn’t do it. He was nothing more than a coward. The words wouldn’t come out no matter how hard he tried to force them, like there was an invisible force squeezing at his neck, trapping the words in his throat. He didn’t want his last image of you to be a sad one. He didn’t want to have to fly away to the sounds of your cries. The thought crushed him, so he ran away from it, and now he was stuck regretting it for the rest of his life, he knew he couldn’t make up for what he did to you.“You have to leave again don’t you?”

Your voice ripped him from his thoughts, he dared not turn around. The sorrow in your voice was enough to make him wince. Just like the day he had left without warning, his voice failed him. He could barely manage a nod but you caught it. “For good?” Another nod, his head hung low, shoulder trembling. Suddenly feeling grateful for being sat down you hunched over. Your hair covering your eyes as you breathed out. Perhaps you would’ve been better off if this was a dream after all.

Another silence hung between you two, it was painful. The air felt heavy, a pressure weighing down on both of your shoulders that had built up over the last six years. Izuku shook his head, he couldn’t let things end like this. He couldn’t do it to you again. He may not be able to stay but there was something else he could do.

Tear’s silently escaped your eyes, falling onto the grass floor beneath you like sorrowful raindrops. You kept your eyes and mouth shut tight, you didn’t want him to see you crying before he left, but how could you not be upset by such a cruel fate? He had always taken up such a big part of your heart, and now he was telling you he was going to leave and you’d most likely never see each other again.

A pair of smaller hands cupped your cheeks, lifting your face up. Your tears soaked his hands but he didn’t mind. He smiled, rubbing at the wet trails on your cheeks with his forearm. Without a word between you, he flew down and grabbed one of your hands with both of his. He tugged at it and you stood up, allowing him to silently guide you.  He took you out of your back garden and into the forest that resided on the other side of your fence. The thought of going into a forest at night scared you, even with a trusted friend guiding you. The further you strayed from home the darker it got, trees obstructing the moon's light as you stepped into the forest. Izuku's green glow acted as a torch, keeping you safe from darkness.

After 5 minutes of walking in silence, your lips pulled into a frown, “Where are we going?” You finally asked with a bit of hesitance, one of his hands held onto your index finger, pulling you through the maze of trees with expertise. You stumbled and winced as stones and twigs poked at your bare feet like tiny needles. You had to rely on the glowing of your friend and what little of the moon's rays peaked through the trees to light your surroundings.

He didn’t reply to your question, but he didn’t need to. He guided you around a giant oak tree, and once you did your jaw dropped.

Fireflies danced around the open space between the trees, gathering together to create a soft golden glow in the cloud of darkness, like a million little lanterns floating in the sky. Flowers and vines decorated the trees wrapping around like snakes. There were no more stones and twigs for you to worry about as your feet hit the grass. It felt like a soft blanket under your sore feet. It was a grassy stage, the moon hit down on the open area like a spotlight, much like it had back in your garden. There were no overhanging branches that blocked it's path with shadows. It was enchanting, like something right out of a fairy tale.

Subconsciously you stepped forward into the light, your breath knocked out of you. You were so entranced by what you were seeing that you didn’t get to see the way Izuku was staring at you. It was something that you would never be able to see again. The way his lips curled up, eyes sparkling with fondness for you. The moon's light hit you perfectly, giving you a white glow, like an angel. Maybe you were an angel in disguise, he wouldn’t be surprised.

“It’s… amazing.” That was an understatement, but how were you supposed to put this into words? It was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. He smiled and flew in front of you so he could take in your expression, your lips were parted and slightly curled at the edges. He could see the reflection of dancing fireflies in your doe eyes.

He couldn’t care less about the fireflies behind him. In his eyes, you were way more breathtaking, and to see your smile again after so many years, it made his heart melt.

"There's something else." He brushed past you, making you  finally snap from your trance. He flew over to a particularly large tree, there was a small circular hole in it, showing its hollowed out insides. He disappeared into, and when he came back he carried a vial with a strange blue liquid inside. "I was saving it for something special and I suppose there's nothing more special than being here, with you, right now." He pulled the cork out and drank the strange liquid.

You watched silently as a blue light circled around him soon engulfing him in a blinding light. You turned your head away and closed your away in fear of being permanently blinded. You didn’t know when it would be safe to turn back, so you waited until a hand cupped your face.

A much... larger hand. You opened your eyes, gasping when you saw your fairy was human sized, he was just a touch taller than you. The increase in his size made his features more prominent, you could finally see how handsome he really was. You could admire his freckles, the way his hair brushes against the top of his eyes, you even got a closer look at this leaf clothing. They were skilfully stitched to fit his body, you wondered if he did it himself.

He smiled, watching you lean into his hand, nuzzling into his hold.. "Care to dance?" He asked softly, the pad of his thumb brushing over your cheek. Such a simple action, yet it held so much love, you felt breathless. Your heart was beating too fast for your lungs to keep up with.

You nodded and stepped forward. His hands placed themselves on your waist as your hands went up to his shoulders. His hands trembled, his touch feather-like, as if he was scared to break you.

The lack of music didn't bother either of you, with the orange glow of the fireflies, the moon's lights shining down on you, and the blissful sounds of nature, it was perfect the way it was. You followed his lead as you swayed back and forth together, this offer to dance had been nothing more than an excuse to hold you close one last time. It didn't matter that neither of you knew how to slow dance, or that you were in your nightgown, barefooted. You were in each other's arms and that was all that mattered.

Before he knew it, your head was resting against his shoulder, a melodic light humming filled his left ear. It sent shivers down his spine, his wings fluttering behind him as you hummed a secret song. He closed his eyes and leaned his head against yours, your hair tickled his nose as he tried to memorise your scent. He wanted this moment to be engraved into his brain forever.

You slow danced for so long, he had lost track of time. Neither of you were willing to let go, it was too hard to do this again. Everything felt so perfect, so tranquil. like you were the only two people in the world.

He finally got the willpower to peek his eye open, the sun's rays peeking over the horizon and disturbing the moon's glow. The stars, that were witness to your dance, were disappearing from the sky. It was time to go, yet you were blissfully unaware of this as you continued to hum into his ear. You hadn’t opened your eyes a single time since you’ve been in his arms, you were too scared to open them and have to face reality.

With every ounce of strength he had in his body his hands trailed up to your shoulders, memorising the feeling of your skin, he hesitantly pushed you away. He held you at arm length, your eyes opening and staring into his.

You looked scared.

He smiled at you, moving forward to rest his forehead against yours. "Close your eyes." He whispered, and without hesitation your eyes fluttered close. Your hand gripped onto his, as a way to make sure he wasn't going to disappear.

He released a shaky breath as he took your hand into both of his. Cupping it protectively. After a few seconds of nothing but shuffling, you felt something being placed into your palm. It was thin and light, you almost peaked an eye open but one hand came up to cover your eyes.

You patiently stood there, not daring to question what he was up to. A few seconds went by before you felt a feather-like kiss being placed onto your lips. You sharply inhaled through your nose. His kiss lingered for a long time, silently telling you he loved you. His hand squeezed yours when you kissed back, eagerly leaning into the affection. Lips moulded together, with no haste to pull away anytime soon.

When his lips reluctantly left yours, the hand covering your eyes didn't move. You smiled, your heart racing at the sweet gesture. His hand fell away, but your eyes remained closed, you felt another kiss be placed on top of your head, his nose bumping against your skin.

“I love you.” He whispered, a quiet confession confined to your shared bubble.

He pulled away, his hand releasing yours. You waited for him to do something else, to tell you to open your eyes now, but there was nothing…You figured he was done and so you opened your eyes. You gasped for breath, placing a hand over your heart. It felt like a knife had stabbed through your chest.

He was gone.

The fireflies had disappeared, the moon had disappeared, and so had your beloved fairy. The only sign that he had really been here was the lingering feeling of his lips on yours, they tingled with leftover electricity.  

Looking down to the gift he had left you, you found a flower, a forget-me-not to be exact.

You swallowed, eyes stinging as pools of tears gathered in the corners. You used your fingers to gently caress the petals. It figures that he would choose to leave you with this of all flowers.

You held it close to your chest, staring up at the newly lit sky, the sun cast orange hues over the forest, it was beautiful, but you couldn’t admire it, too bitter at the star for ruining your night. You wanted to see the moon again, to dance under the stars for hours more,

"As if I could forget you." You let out a breathy laugh, closing your eyes so you could pretend it was still night. "I love you too."

[bryan360]

My reactions through my Nintendo E3 2021’s highlight picks

Hey guys! You know me from what been checking on E3 announcement last week. I even did my other posts to mention it of 🐰Mario + Rabbits sequel game and 🏁🏎Forza Horizon 5 as my interests picks.

June. 13th, 2021 - Link Here

June. 14th, 2021 - Link Here #2

Now it's finally time that I can talk through Nintendo E3 2021's announcement of games and content; after reveals back in June 15th that I should've bring this sooner, but due to working on my other tasks that I'm gonna save it til today. Hoping that I had time for free time to explain of what I feel for Nintendo E3 2021 Direct reveal for this month of June; especially which one that I finding most interested so I could added through my wishlist on eShop app. So today, here's my interesting picks for Nintendo E3 reveal this year; whether you agreed or disagree of how it goes when you suggest other was. I know if everyone so close to look forward the Switch Pro reveal, but it seems that it didn't happen anytime soon. Anyways, now get into my picks that I screenshot and edited through last week's Nintendo Direct I've managed.

First top left - ✊😈Kazuya Mishima joining Super Smash Bros Ultimate

First off, I knew that there will be at least one Super Smash Bros DLC Fighter reveal; before saving the last one for coming months this year soon. What's really unexpected to see though is a second Bandai Namco fighter after 👻PAC-MAN, but sadly its not Lloyd that if everyone hoping he would've upgraded from a Mii Costume to a true fighter yet. (Like we ever getting another sword fighter once again. 😒) No, it was actually ✊😈Kazuya Mishima from the Tekken series. My reaction was caught my attention since it started when he carrying Ganondorf to the lava pit and so does other fighters that is really dark. Except for Kirby that thankfully knows how to get away, but still. If I remember his origin through reading wiki site though, at time he used to be good until his father Heihachi sees him as his weakness. Later when Heihachi kills one of the family members that Kazuya been fond of and being thrown by his father in the cliff until he eventually climbs back up when his devil gene activates. Ever since then, Kazuya is now antagonist for the recent Tekken games so far and seeing him to match fight against Smash was an unexpected sight. I remember the time after hearing Masahiro Sakurai's interview where he consider Heihachi to be playable for Smash 4, but pass over due to implement his moveset to be difficult. But here we are seeing for Kazuya instead that it really sure takes time to deliver. After his moveset through his reveal could be challenging to work it out on command. Let's just wait to figure out once Sakurai will finally bring us his next presentation next week, but for now knowing this Tekken fighter joining Smash was a unique idea that Sakurai managed to work it out.

Second top right - 🌟Mario Party Super Stars

How about that when where seeing the next Mario Party game brings us? Despite the recent 2018 Super Mario Party, this will be the twelfth installment to be heading Nintendo Switch this year's 🎃October 2021; this time having 100 remastered minigames like I've seen them before on previous Mario Party games. My reaction was good to see how it continues on, but sure miss that time I remember from my childhood for the original first Mario Party game on the N64 console. So what's get me attention is the recognized boards such as 👑🎂Peach's Birthday Cake makes a comeback! It looks the way that I remember from playing the N64 game when the layouts off frosting goodness and the song to match as well. It was really something when it comes from Nintendo and their past N64 games I have memories fond of. 🙂👍🏼

I give this Nintendo a good move when trying to bring back Mario Party again as a E3 reveal, but maybe just maybe if it will be this good from previous Mario Party games in terms of selling copies. Who knows? *Shrug*

Third middle left - Metroid Dread

However, if you really looking forward a new Nintendo game coming to October 2021 early is a most recognized franchise making a return....meanwhile Metroid Prime 4 is still in development. At least knowing this game can take us time before the fourth prime game can be finished, but man that everyone went crazy after the reveal of Metroid Dread! It the return of 2D Metroid game in action after the success of Samus Return for 3DS back in September 2017. My reaction was surprised and impressive for the looks and feels about this game's tone; especially the haunting part where the robot named "EMMI" (but don't be confused with the word Emmy as an Emmy Award like if would funny. 😅) trying to catch up with Samus and it's game over....😵 I think I could add this into my wishlist and it would be the first time I'll be owning this Metroid game for my Switch system. Fact: Metroid Dread was originally plan as a Nintendo DS title way back in mid 2000s, but sadly being cancelled due to technical limitations.

Fourth middle right - 💣WarioWare Get It Together

I was hoping if Warioware could come back for the lastest Switch system and they finally called. However, this game will take a different approach than doing minigames of yourself, but with your characters do it for you. For this latest Warioware game of picking noses, it'll be having one of the characters such as Wario, Mona, Jimmy T, 9-Volt, and others to do on all minigames with their strengths and skills they can managed. My reaction was pretty good knowing that Nintendo is making this a unique idea than doing a same microgame gameplay style from previous ones, but in a fun way. Cross my fingers if I'll be saving this as a digital download version. Like that time I actually got "Warioware Touched!" for my 2DS/3DS handheld system back in April 2016, but sadly lost it of deletion unfortunately....😧 Link Here #3

Fifth middle bottom - Game & Watch The Legend of Zelda

And finally is something that we're hoping to expect during almost halftime of their E3 direct reveal. Knowing this year is The Legend of Zelda 35th Anniversary, you probably hoping they can bring something to celebrate one of the most recognized series run. While it was shocking to know they won't be having plans to do; even for me that I finding baffling for Nintendo would do this. At least they wanted to make up for it by having to released the HD remastered version of Skyward Sword coming next month and giving us a second look for the upcoming Breath of the Wild sequel until it'll be released next year....eventually. What's my pick though is the Game & Watch version for The Legend of Zelda; the same thing of what it made for Super Mario and during its 35th Anniversary run last year. For this next one will have 3 related Zelda games: 1987 original, Zelda 2: The Adventure of Link, The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening, and a special Game and Watch version of Vermin, but playing as Link as he trying to clobbered the octoroks instead of moles. Looks like it'll be a different take from what the Super Mario version have, but hoping it won't be the limited edition once maybe I could get one of those a try. So for my reaction was pretty alright. 🙂👍🏼

Overall:

Man that is the list for my interests picks I gotten, but after watching Nintendo E3 Direct for this year sure worth it at the end. It was very impressive direct despite of absent games not being showed like Bayonette 3 or Metroid Prime 4, but with other announcements such as Metroid Dread and Mario Party Super Stars does give us something for the win.

What did you think about this list of my interesting picks for Nintendo E3, though? Give yourself some likes and reblogs for this post I bring. Anyways, I'm just gonna check on my P-Pal's secret art trade part for me that I should've done it early. Sorry about making this post that I took hours to finished, @murumokirby360

[o0o-chibaken-o0o]

heya:) do you by any chance have any party game fics (idk, truth or dare, fuck marry kill, spin the bottle, never have i ever...) that aren't "starts with a spin" and "right hand red" or "'check this hand 'cause i'm marvellous" because, obviously, those are classics! but i've been craving fics like these and your recs are always AWESOME, so if you have some, that would make my day! ♥♥♥ fucking love your blog btw

DO I KNOW ANY PARTY GAME FICS?? DO I??

(spoiler alert: the answer is fuck yes I have a ton of them, this is one of my all-time favorite tropes!)

Drarry & Party Games Fic Recs

Starts With A Spin by Maxine (120K)- It started with the spin of a bottle, and now Harry and Draco have gotten themselves so far into their own game there’s almost no way out again. Except to keep playing.You can’t tell me not to include the most quintessential party games fic ever on my party games rec list! Much like Drarry’s relationship, this fic starts with a game of spin the bottle and then develops over a series of fucking amazing funny REALISTIC teenage drinking games. And there’s a real, developed plot too! Oh, and smut. Don’t forget the smut. Perfection!!

Right Hand Red by lumosed_quill (73K)- Harry felt Malfoy’s breath on his lips as they came together over the bottle, hands firmly planted on the floor as though they each needed their familiar soil, refusing to cross into enemy territory. Except that Malfoy no longer felt like his enemy. Malfoy felt inevitable.I challenge you to find one person who has read this fic and not loved it to death. Like Starts With A Spin, there are tons of fun games that bring our boys together, but unlike Starts With A Spin, they are into each other from the beginning and it is a sweet lovely romance and MY FAVORITE THING is Harry teaching Draco to cast a Patronus.

check this hand ‘cause I’m marvelous by lumosed_quill (8K)- Harry’s had a crush on Malfoy for months now. But it will take a bar full of his friends, some Firewhisky, wagers made on his behalf, and Malfoy himself to get him to act on it.You know, on my own I probably wouldn’t have thought to include this one for party games because they’re at a bar, but they’re playing DARTS so it TOTALLY FITS and I’m so glad you mentioned it. Draco is a sexy fucking bastard here. Sexy. Fucking. Bastard. Do you like sexy Draco? READ IT.

How to Handle an Enemy by who_la_hoop (7.5K)- Everyone knows that it’s no fun playing truth or dare with a Slytherin. But add a little Veritaserum, a scheming duo of Slytherin girls and surprising things can be revealed. Particularly about the fine line between love and hate…I fucking ADORE this fic!! It (and its equally-amazing-but-lacking-party-games-sequel Turnabout is Fair Play) is one of the hottest things I’ve ever read. The Slytherins play veritaserum Truth or Dare and then– ENTER THEIR SURPRISE PARTY GUEST: THE BOY WHO IS THE OBJECT OF DRACO’S LUST. And there’s WANKING PUBLIC WANKING. 

Spin the Wand by WrittenSins (3K)- In the spirit of inter-house unity, the eighth years have a small party. In an attempt to get Harry and Ginny back together, Hermione and Ron come up with the plan of a rigged game of Spin the Wand, but not all goes as planned. Excerpt: “The idea was simple: A game of spin the bottle, but instead of a bottle, a toy wand, and instead of a game of chance, Hermione had spelled the wand to land on whoever the spinner most desired to kiss.”One of those fics where the summary says it all- and you’re probably already reading the fic, not sticking around to hear me babble about how cute it is XD

Silk Scarves and Enchanted Handcuffs by TommyLane (28.5K)- It was only supposed to be for seven minutes and then the blindfold would come off and he’d be free from the dark cupboard and his mystery partner - only Harry was no longer sure he wanted it to end.This fic is brilliant. It’s pretty much just one long party with one long game in which Harry and Draco are blindfolded and shoved into a cupboard together and then subsequently handcuffed. YEAH. And Harry is like “WHO IS THIS HOT PIECE OF ARSE I’M KISSING I WANT TO DO THIS FOREVER” and then he’s like “OH IT WAS MALFOY….STILL WANT TO DO IT FOREVER.” Mhmm. Yep.

Teach Me by lauren3210 (3K) “I’ve decided to help you out,” Draco had said earlier that evening, plonking himself down on the sofa next to Potter.Draco benevolently offers to teach Harry to play poker. And then he not-so-benevolently draws him into a private game of strip poker ;)

One Night at the Leaky by birdsofshore (12.5K)- Harry should have known better than to accept a drunken dare. Especially when Malfoy was sitting right there, looking like that and wearing those bloody tight trousers.What’s better than eighth year truth or dare? ADULT truth or dare. Especially amazing funny lovely adult truth or dare in which Harry tries to win a date with Draco Malfoy

Games Night by @agentmoppet​ (7K)- Harry has no idea why Hermione decided that an inter-house Games Night would be a good idea, but he’s here now, and he intends to beat Malfoy, no matter what game he chooses. But, who would have thought muggle games could be full of so much… tension?Aaaah Harry and Draco being super competitive playing various muggle games

Trick or Treat by amorette (9.5K)- Harry had no idea that he was such a fetishist - a fact which he discovers on Halloween.This fic has so many good things- Draco loses a bet and has to wear a girl’s uniform to the Halloween party. Harry is distracted and jealous all night. A game of “trick or treat.” And kinky kinky, very hot smut. 

The Lovers’ Circle by nicevenn (13.5K)- Tired of feeling alone, Harry agrees to play a matchmaking game with the other eighth years. It’s just a game, after all. What harm could it do?AAAH these tarot cards match up Harry and Draco because they’re compatible af, but they refuse to do the task (THE AMAZING TASK) they are given, so Harry and Draco have to endure a curse! And by curse I mean they’re bonded in an incredibly creative and helpful way. FLUFF and CHRISTMAS

Corruptela Vox by Constant Vigilance (5.5K)- Draco’s kink is revealed. Pretty much a PWP. Parselsmut Parselsmut Parselsmut. With a side of truth or dare, embarrassment, and some fluff.

Never Have I Ever by faithwood (0.5K)- Hogwarts students play the “Never have I ever” game.Can a fic be a classic if it’s only 690 words long? APPARENTLY SO because this is required reading and it’s perfect. 

Restraint by @fleetofshippyships (153.5K)- Someone casts the Imperius curse on Draco Malfoy, and whatever the instructions may be, Harry finds himself an unwilling target. The encounter leaves him torn between pleasure and revulsion. As they fight in the aftermath, a tense game begins. Harry fights to convince Malfoy, and himself, that he was not affected by that initial encounter, or any of those following it. Faced with a series of escalating encounters, Harry must come to terms with desiring things he never thought he could, things he wishes he didn’t respond to. They each use signs of arousal as weapons against each other in a mad struggle to finally shame the other into backing down for good. But it’s only after the game is over that Harry starts to understand.So as you can probably guess, there’s quite a bit of angst in this fic, but the development of their relationship reads really realistically, and if you’re into the enemies-to-reluctant-lovers trope (aren’t we all?!) then you will absolutely enjoy this blessedly LONG fic, which features plenty of games to out Harry and Draco to their friends ;) (warning for brief but detailed Harry/George)

Bond, Shag, or Crucio by catsintheattic (5K)- I hope you all realise how asinine this situation is,“ says Draco as he looks down his nose at the assembled party.Just a short little fic in which the Slytherins and Gryffindors join together for a revealing game of the wizard equivalent for fuck, marry, kill ;)

Seven Minutes in the Garden of Wizarding Delights by Zahra (3K)- Draco Malfoy is resolutely heterosexual; Pansy Parkinson will attest to this. So will Queenie Greengrass, Orla Quirke, Eloise Midgen, and if pressed, Blaise Zabini.There is Seven Minutes in Heaven and Draco is in MAJOR denial and his inner monologue is hilarious. 

Reigning Champ by LadySlytherin (14K)- If there’s one thing every Slytherin loves, it’s a good game. Too Hot was played at every party Slytherin House had hosted for years, and Draco had won every round since the first time he played. Pride in his title as Champion was to be expected. Stating it like a challenge in front of the returning Eighth-Year Gryffindors? Not Draco’s brightest move, to be sure. Combine the challenge with mistletoe, feminine wiles and secret plots, Ron Weasley’s temper, and an unexpected connection with a Dragonologist and Draco’s Christmas just got a whole lot more complicated!I’ve never seen a game quite like this before- the first person to touch the other during a kiss loses. And Draco thinks he’s so cool and invincible but he’s NOT because when it comes to Harry he just can’t restrain himself! As you may imagine, it features lots of non-HD kisses for game purposes, but also be warned that Draco goes on a date with Charlie. Endgame 100% Drarry though!

Veritaserum Truth or Dare by ElectricBlueLilies (2K)- The returning eighth years bond over a game of Truth or Dare.Short, adorable, easy fluff

You Already Know What’s Next by silverdawn89 (14.5K)- It’s about Truth or Dare, except it’s not really about Truth or Dare at all. Or: there is alcohol and a bunch of twenty-somethings play embarrassing party games.Harry is Draco’s neighbor, and he is very LOUD and ANNOYING until Draco is finally invited to one of his parties and it has to be a prank only it’s not

Lockdown by Vorabiza (35K)- Four Gryffindors and four Slytherins under a forced lockdown in the potions classroom for two days.A lot of Harry being a confident, sexy bastard who’s done everything you could ever think to mention in a game of Never Have I Ever. Also some exhibitionism for good measure :P

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

Evading eternal gloom and chaos in general | November Goals Update

Hey People of Earth!

Today is December 1st. Which means, November (death) is over, and I can officially restart life during Christmas break in 21 days. November as a whole was much better than October (so much, we don't even compare the two) which is strange, as November is the month of death usually because school gets crazy. Regardless, I’m very pleased that I somehow evaded eternal gloom (for the most part) in November.

Some cool things happened this month, including two university open houses in two different locations in Ontario (London + Windsor = two road trips, two weekends in a row), that high school dance life (my first hs dance when ur last year is next year and this is the first social occasion you’ve attended haaaa lol rip) and Literally The Worst Case Of Writer’s Block Ever I Kid You Not. (Which I will definitely go into in this month’s writing update!)

Overall, November was this very chaotic amalgamation of busy, but cumulatively, was pretty darn memorable. Darn.

Onto the goals.

(Also, I don't know if I’ve ever explained this in recent years, but I work with goals in a very strange way. As in, I don't really work with them, as in, I write these posts every month with goals, then never refer to them for the entire month, then come back a month later ?? and ?? for some ?? reason this ?? works ?? it’s also very entertaining to laugh at my failures is that morbid that I enjoy this very much oh no)

(I enjoy writing these posts a lot though, they give me some time to reflect on the last 30 or 31 days I’ve lived and they act as a great routine. :))

Anywhoozies, onto the things I did and mostly did not do:

1. Hit 15k in FOSTERED #6

So. Let’s just talk about this goal very briefly, shall we. As I mentioned above, November and I did not get along in terms of writing, as in, November served me a big ol’ slice of Writer’s Block and left me to choke on it. I wasn't really expecting this block to be so severe, but it was a thing, and it was very real. I mentioned this in DtWT #66, and I know writer’s block is controversial (some people thinks it’s a bullshit excuse, some people don't care, some people strongly believe in it, etc). I stand on the side of ‘in creative fields, every artist is bound to run into some form of a challenge at some point in their career’. As a creative person, I've experienced tons of creative block. In some cases, yes, this block is caused by fear, lack of ideas, sometimes procrastination, but ohhhh myyy, November’s writer’s block was none of these things.

Initially, it was straight up fear, I’ll admit that. I was just starting this book, didn't want to screw up the beginning of the *very last* book, couldn't piece together ideas that I thought were good even though @sarahkelsiwrites​ was very honest about them and had good feedback, etc, etc. I would say the first week and a half of this block were straight-up fear based. And then weeks 2 + 3 came and it sort of wasn't anymore. I wasn't scared to write this book because at this point, I was pretty fed up with my moping and fear, and just wanted to get some words out.

*and then the words stopped coming and they just stopped coming*

(which isn't entirely the truth, but let me elaborate)

In this time period, I was still writing. I was still hitting my 250 goal almost every single day, and there wasn't one day I didn't go about writing, or go about figuring out how to go about writing. To me, writer’s block doesn't mean I’m not writing. It just means there’s this disconnect that prevents me from immersing myself into my work, thus holding me back from creating the best thing I possibly can, OR making me think I’m creating something of unsubstantial standards. Does this make sense.

So yes, I was very out of it, and I really do think this block was triggered by fear, and once I got over that fear, lingered. BUT I’m doing MUCH better now, let’s not jinx this, AKA I hit 15 587 words this month and when I made this goal literally didn't think I would haaaa bless.

2. Outline more of ALANNIS, and like maybe try to finish it, though I mean this isn’t going to happen, so yeah, just work on it pls

No. lol. So. I’m going to count this as a half win, because I did complete this goal, but not by much. In October’s post, I mentioned I wanted to go through this outline to see if I could possibly shift some of them into the POV of my boi Matthew. This novel is narrated by Chris, and while I love my girl, something was missing from the story, and so I was like, yanno, screw it, let’s see if I can find some chapters to give to Matt just for the hell of it. Overall, I found about 12 or so chapters I could give to him (excluding new ideas that I haven't gotten, but yes), which is pretty good. Not sure I even want to do this dual POV thing, but I mean, I worked on the outline sort of so. (I really need to get on top of this thing I’ve been outlining it for like a year oops.)

3. Upload cover making video

So abridged version of this disclaimer: basically, my hard drive died on me this month, it had all the footage for all my upcoming YouTube vids, including all the speedpaints and cover making vids, lol sigh back up your stuff kids, didn't listen to myself, rip my data, you will be missed (didn’t lose anything personal and my documents are always protected because they’re the most important) SOOO that happened. HOWEVERRR, this is not an excuse for why I did not finish this goal because I literally had another cover making video exported and ready on my computer BUUUUT I’m vERYyyY extra and wasn't liking how my THUMBNAIL was coming out so yesterday when I was scrambling to actually get this goal done because good job time management, was like yo okay imma redo this tomorrow, and so here’s the thumbnail:

And here’s the ugly shit it was before:

AND ACTUALLY, the only reason I never got this vid up like I dunno THREE WEEKS AGO WHEN IT WAS READY, was because of this THUMBNAILLLL WHICH HAS BEEN LIKE A 2 WEEK PROCESS.

(why do I take these things so seriously)

(this thumbnail took me longer to make than the goddamn book cover)

(I digress so sorry for that rant)

(th u mb n a il)

I did get the video up today, though, and you can watch it right here:

4. Read a book yo.

I actually did this, lol. I finished Kristen Martin’s Shadow Crown this month and started History of Wolves by Emily Fridlund, but I’ve been reading that one at school and like, so far, I’m getting the vibe that I need some hardcore tea and snow and a fire log and some peace and quiet to just appreciate this book because so far I’ve read it in math class and while I do enjoy my math class, i’m getting the feeling this book ain’t no math class aesthetic. (so, the answer is, no I didn't finish this book, but yes, I really really want to because i’m liking it a lot so far and the voice is nice as fuuuuuuuuh and dooooon’t get me started on the writing clapz for dayz)

5. Finish another character portrait

I actually did four portraits this month, two of which are Christmas gifts so I can’t share those at the moment, but here’s one I did of @sarahkelsiwrites​’ character Simon:

(and you can watch the speedpaint HERE)

And then one I did of Quinn, my MC for THIS IS WHERE THE END STARTS:

(which might be my favourite piece of art and you can watch the speedpaint HERE)

6. Find and finalize an ALANNIS epigraph

I dunno why this is still a goal because I’m literally not going to do it if I’m hardly working on the darn outline, but yes, no, fail.

7. Work on FOSTERED #5′s book cover

Epic fail, XD. I don't like the design of the re-designed FOSTERED covers, but for the sake of consistency, I’m going along, and that's serving for some unenthusiastic cover designing but I do need to get this done so I can order copies. (WHICH, by the way, I have a new copy of I’M DISAPPOINTED to order, a copy of my sister’s novel, A HAPPINESS TO WONDER, a copy of my novelette sort of thing THE TREATED and on top of this FOSTERED #5, you can totally call me cheap for realllyyyy not wanting to pay for that shipping twice, lol. Point is, I’ll be doing an unboxing because those are literally my favourite videos ever and I’ve watched every single one on YouTube no lie. ;))

So those were the goals. Finished 4ish/almost5 out of 7 goals this much which is pretty ass, but the ones I didn't finish (with the exception of one AKA THE OUTLINE) weren't super important. Some shtuff I’d like to get done in December:

1. Hit 25k in FOSTERED #6 (aka REWIRED)

2. Outline more of ALANNIS, and like maybe try to finish it, though I mean this isn’t going to happen, so yeah, just work on it pls

COME ONNNN

(it’s literally been so long since I actually outlined this book)

3. Upload a video

4. Read a book yo.

I really do doubt I’ll get this one done, but it’d be real nice.

5. Finish another character portrait

7. Work on FOSTERED #5′s book cover

Probably also won’t finish this oneeee haaaheeaahahe

8. Make a character aesthetic

(this is sort of a cop out because I have to make one for Lonan this month since his birthday is on the 9th and for those birthday posts I need one but also I've been telling myself to do this since the start of November and ohhh noo I’m running out of time oops)

So that’s it for now, folks. I hope your November was great. :) Keep an eye out for the monthly writing update! That’s it for now, thanks for reading!

--Rachel