academicvalidation4life

[academicvalidation4life]

"use chatgpt" that's the devil talking. buy four caffeinated drinks and pull an all nighter. this is the way.

[academicvalidation4life]

[academicvalidation4life]

Saturday, November 16th

I’ve started taking my university entrance exams, it’s not going as well as I hoped, but I’ve already been called back for the second phase of one of the best universities in the country!

Right now, my main goal is to take care of my mental and physical well-being. Academically, what I could have done, I did, for the last 17 years of my life. For the exams, I just have to be on my best game so I can focus and deliver what I can.

Wish me luck! I still have another month of exams coming along 😣 tomorrow is the most important of them all. Hopefully, all the hard work will pay off and in two months I’ll be enrolled in the university of my dreams, studying hard to become an engineer. Can’t wait to tag everything as “women in STEM”.

[academicvalidation4life]

It's like bitches are academically smart but when it comes to life and common sense it's crickets

[academicvalidation4life]

9.23.24 | Making my desk more autumnal with a gourd from my garden bed and some flowers my mom and dad bought me :,)

I’ve been working SO HARD and it still feels like it’s not enough. I have a few bigger assignments this week, and then 3 exams next week.

[academicvalidation4life]

｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡ ﾟ. october is full of love and fun and achievement ﾟ ･｡･ﾟ

[academicvalidation4life]

29/09/24

The maths test was cancelled because our teacher had an exam that he forgot to tell us about! Huff! So, my friend and I discussed about chemistry for an hour and a half. Currently I'm studying for the English exam tomorrow!

[academicvalidation4life]

really enjoying how all of my classes eventually converge on the same one hundred years through very different routes

[academicvalidation4life]

[academicvalidation4life]

𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑑𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑜𝑤𝑛𝑒𝑟

[academicvalidation4life]

found a new coffee shop in the area per my best friend’s recommendation ☕️

— i had to miss japanfest atl to catch up on work :( i just feel so behind lately, and since my weeks are so busy, i need the whole weekend to catch up on schoolwork sadly.

[academicvalidation4life]

Going to grad school, I see

[academicvalidation4life]

Wednesday, September 25th

To have a clean start on everything, I started making some changes. I made an effort to do my skincare, and already set up a few beauty appointments (hair, nails etc), because for me, looking my best helps me feel my best. I quit some bad habits, will do my best to stay away from that stuff. Now, I'm only missing sticking to my gym and sleep schedule, which is a longer process.

I also decided to delete all my social media, as it's a big distraction. That will include Twitter, TikTok and Instagram. I'll keep Snapchat and WhatsApp app because of communication.

I have already read a few of my mandatory reads this week. I'm starting with the shorter novels and working my way up to the longer ones, so I don’t get unmotivated. I have also started to make a bigger effort to pay attention in classes, since because of my mental state I had been mostly sleeping through them.

Small progress, but still progress!

I have three finals left, the first one on Monday. My current goal is to not freak out and revise as much as possible.

[academicvalidation4life]

Saturday, September 14th

It's been a while. And a lot has changed. I'm not going to med school anymore, I decided on Engineering. I'm also applying for Mathematics and Business at other universities. We'll see where I get in.

My winter break, which was in July, was the best month of my life, incredible. I met many people I'll cherish forever, even long distance won't make me lose touch with them. I realised finding a purpose makes every moment happier. And also, realised I love dealing with children. I'm unsure how that will come into play in my Engineering career.

I have also since my last post turned 17! An age of uncertainty, learning experiences, joy and heartbreak.

My mental health has been a mess in the past month and a half, which means I have fallen way behind in my studies. I'm not sure I'll be able to get in anywhere - which furthers my anxiety.

I have 32 books to read and a lifetime's worth of topics to revise in a month. However, I'm currently having trouble even getting out of bed. Starting Monday, I'm planning on restarting my whole approach not only to my studies but also to my life in general. If I keep going the way I am right now, it's not that I'll not get into university, I'll crash. Hard.

I've been trying to have a positive outlook in life. It hasn't been working great, but I'm trying to convince myself that my misery and unhappiness are just a product of teenage angst. That's what they say in the books anyway. One way I've started to gather myself back together is by encouraging healthy habits, such as exercising often and journaling. Next to tackle is my sleep schedule and eating something other than chicken nuggets.

On another note, I have improved a lot in my essay writing. I haven't gotten anything below 90% in a very long time. If I keep my math grades up, I still might have a chance at a good future. I also have started practising for my Uni interviews, which, as a person with a lot of social anxiety, has been very challenging.

It's bittersweet to change my blog bio, but it is time to give up on some dreams and focus on others. I am still young, and realising Medicine wasn't for me was a big adjustment.

Hopefully, this post will signify a new chapter in my academics and life. I will try to update as often as possible, as a way to keep myself accountable and motivated. By February, I hope to be able to announce a change in my bio from "future" to "current".

[academicvalidation4life]

Wednesday, May 22nd

It has been a while! After finals, which ended April 30th, I got into a depressive episode. I attend a very challenging school (when applying to Uni, all classes I take - even regular ones - are considered AP) which takes a lot out of me, emotionally, and physically. I didn't do well in finals and even dropped out of one of my honours classes (targeted for Med school applicants). After that, I just felt like a complete failure. My sister came back from Uni for summer, and she's excelling at everything, she got a 4.0 GPA and is already really inserted into her industry, all in her Freshman Year. I'm so very proud of her! At the same time, it's hard not to compare myself. Right now, I'm trying to focus on the small wins. I got 100% in all the Maths exams (six of them) I took last term! I got the highest grade I've ever gotten in Chem. Slowly, but surely, I'll get there. This week, my goal is not to spend all day rotting in bed, I want to go back to the gym, for both my mental and physical health, and fall back into my studying schedule since midterms have already re-started. I have exactly a month left before break (June/21) which will be very much appreciated! I'll have a month off, and school will return in August, already kicking off with two mocks and two weeks of finals 😅. With good planning, I can still turn it around and do my best for the rest of the year. Currently, I am failing two subjects - which is FAR from ideal, but considering I take 18 classes, it could be much worse. My focus this month is to try and get the best grades possible on the midterms for these subjects (Philosophy and Biology) so I'm a bit less stressed once finals come around. Also, doing well on my mocks can boost my grade by 10%! I have one this Saturday and I am revising as much as I can to have this bonus to fall back on, in case all else fails. Honestly, I have zero motivation, am exhausted, and still completely depressed. The only thing keeping me going is, ironically, my anxiety. Be a failure only now or be a failure forever? I'm doing the best I can (which I am aware is not nearly enough) every day, taking some notes during class and getting my homework done. I'll try and update more often!

[academicvalidation4life]

no i don't want to use your ai assistant. no i don't want your ai search results. no i don't want your ai summary of reviews. no i don't want your ai feature in my social media search bar (???). no i don't want ai to do my work for me in adobe. no i don't want ai to write my paper. no i don't want ai to make my art. no i don't want ai to edit my pictures. no i don't want ai to learn my shopping habits. no i don't want ai to analyze my data. i don't want it i don't want it i don't want it i don't fucking want it i am going to go feral and eat my own teeth stop itttt

[academicvalidation4life]

Hey Lena, any tips for how to make friends in uni as a nerdy but introverted/socially anxious girlie? 🥺 thank youu

Hi!

I need you to know I saw this ask and immediately thought, "Did I just get a message from my past self?" 😅 Nerdy and introverted? Check. Used to have very bad social anxiety? Check. I was in therapy though and it was immensely helpful! I'm still a little shy but doing incomparably better, so I can tell you what I've learnt and hopefully some of it can help you too :)

Excuse the language, but first of all, you need to give yourself a fucking break. Shy people, we tend to fixate on ourselves: our looks, our posture, on whether what we just said was weird, and so, all our flaws (both real and imaginary) appear magnified tenfold - but only to us. Because truth is, nobody else is judging you half as harshly as you're judging yourself. Nobody is analyzing all your jokes or the way you walk. If you trip or say something awkward, it genuinely doesn't matter. It happens to everybody sometimes, it's okay. Remember that there's nothing wrong with you. Maybe you're shy, maybe you're easily overwhelmed, maybe you have very little experience making friends - but none of these make you inherently weird. So give yourself a break. You're sincerely doing a lot better than you think, I promise.

Small talk is actually not a bad thing, no matter what some edgelords may try to tell you. I used to spark up a lot of conversations early on in uni by bringing up things like the last test (because most of the time I'd get a mildly pained sigh in response and then we'd bond over how hard it was and how the professor was crazy lol) or the upcoming lab class ("Any interesting exercises in your schedule?") or how my commute to uni that day wrecked me and hey are you a commuter? Oh, you live in a dorm, how do you like it? And many other things of this sort, because if you think about it, uni is a neverending source of conversation topics when you're a student talking to another student.

You know how shy people are advised to just ask questions because everybody loves talking about themselves? That's not a bad advice. The trick is to be genuinely curious about other people. Don't ask just to say something, ask to hear what that other person has to say. This is helpful for two reasons: it takes the focus away from you (which is exactly where shy people shouldn't keep it) by directing it at the other person, and it actually helps to keep the conversation going, because it allows you to find either another thing that might interest you about that person or something to share about yourself.

Maybe it's obvious, but don't hide yourself. I know it's a lot easier to just curl up in a corner with your phone, but you gotta put yourself out there. Hang out with the rest of your course mates outside the lecture hall as you're all waiting for the professor. Take your time packing up afterwards instead of dashing straight for the exit. Don't look for that secluded spot where you can hide safely with a book (even though your introvert instinct tells you to do just that), be where the other students hang out.

Sometimes you have to keep choosing someone. Storytime with a moral: I took a liking to one of my current friends very early in the first semester. She seemed like exactly the kind of person I wanted to stick with in uni. I'd always come up to her and talk to her first but she hardly ever did the same. For some time I'd think, "Welp, clearly she doesn't dislike me, but she doesn't seem to like me much either." Now I can't even remember when that changed, but in an honest conversation we had maybe last month (so after almost two years of knowing each other!!), she told me she often struggles with figuring out whether someone likes her and wants her around or not, so she usually just stays away. You aren't the only introvert out there. Maybe the person you're trying to befriend is also a little anxious and needs a bit more time and effort from you. Don't give up too easily!

Not all people are your people and that's okay. You'll find that trying to talk to someone continuously feels like a chore no matter your good intentions. That doesn't mean there's something wrong with you or with them. Everybody can't click with everybody and that's fine!

And lastly: "different friends for different things" is a liberating philosophy. Maybe there's this one person in this one class that you always sit with and get along with well, but it doesn't seem like either of you wants to take it any further than that. Cool! That's your buddy X from Y class. Not everyone has to be your bestie who knows all your secrets and shares all your interests. Be open to the concept of casual friends, so that you don't miss out on the more meaningful relationships by chasing someone who's just not feelin' it if you know what I mean.

Good luck my fellow introvert. Remember getting better at making friends is a process but also a skill that can be practiced and polished. You got this, I'm rooting for you!