#i've had this in the drafts for too long and forgot i wrote this but i still think this is the truest interpretation of mike i've personally

[ilynotes]

i think people have been very deeply misinterpreting mikes character and struggles in s4. his relationship problems with el aren’t about him “trying to be normal” and fearing abnormality, it’s about his codependency and his fears of being alone.

mike wants to be someone’s favorite person. he wants to be someone’s special person. he wants someone to need him, to rely on him, just as he can do the same to them. i see a lot of people say mike needs to learn it’s okay to not be needed because you can still be wanted without being needed, and sometimes that's enough, but i disagree. i don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting to be needed, because that’s what literally all of us want deep down. it’s easy to be wanted by anybody. to be loved by anyone. to be liked by someone. but to have somebody love you so much that they need you in their life, that they need you around, and cannot live easy without the presence and love you give them — that’s a whole different thing. to need each other is a much more intense and raw form of love. when mike tells will so many times that he “keeps telling himself el still needs him,” but he “doesn’t believe it” that he thinks they really might not come back from this fight, will tries to reassure him and say, no, of course she needs you. how could she not? but will is misreading els feelings for mike, when the truth is, mike is right. she doesn’t need him anymore. not in the way she used to or the way he wants her to. and that’s a soul crushing thing for anyone; to realize the person that made you feel like you had a purpose, that looked at you like you were something so special, that made you feel larger than life — doesn’t feel that way anymore.

the thing about mike is he doesn’t know how to live for himself, he doesn’t want to. he lives and shines when he has someone to love with his whole being, and to lose something like that is worse than dying. mike is so codependent on el because he so desperately does not want to lose her, does not want to lose himself through the process of losing her, he is terrified of her not needing him anymore because if he isn’t needed then who is he? where is he supposed to go? so he projects onto el and desperately wants to believe that el needs him the way he needs her. but she doesn’t.

mike doesn’t realize will is that special person for him, he doesn’t realize will is the one that needs him the way he wants to be needed and desired. that will cannot live easily without mike in his life, just like how mike couldn’t live easily without will and el in his. and el and mikes relationship isn’t toxic, or fake, either. el loves mike, she always has. but she doesn’t really need him the way he does. and mike needs el, but does he love her the way she does?

i just think people have been missing the point. mikes feelings and actions make sense when you consider everything he’s bottling up and worrying about inside. it’s hard to read how he feels when he hides everything but what he wants more than anything else is to belong, to be loved and needed so unconditionally, to have that special relationship with someone. he’s deeply insecure of himself and always worrying he isn’t enough, he craves reassurance, he tries so hard to be enough and hide from his fears of being alone or rejected that he fucks everything up. mike doesn’t even have all his feelings and emotions figured out for himself — so of course it’d be hard for us to understand them too.

[onlyseokmins]

ash and cinders • l.s.m.

Pairing: lee seokmin x fem!reader Genres: smut (minors dni!), angst, royalty!au, fantasy!au, gods/goddesses!au Warnings: magic, mentions of blood, war, cruelty, tyranny - all that good stuff, mentions of religion (au-specific), violence (i.e. suggestion of murder), (death) threats, and possible gaslighting 💃🏻 which just means a minor power play between them at first okay 😬 i promise it's not that bad lmao i'm just paranoid, lots of making out, oral (fem. receiving), lil bit of temp play tbh, little bit of choking, uh I wrote this so long ago and just finished it so lmk if i forgot anything?? it's just basically me attempting to write prettily uwu WC: 4.24k A/N: soooo, this has been rotting in my drafts FOREVER!!! but yeah seokmin is my most darling, favorite boy i've ever stanned anyways ofc i couldn't help but use his elle magazine photos (yes that's how long this has been ROTTING) ahhhhh - ahem anyways this goes hand-in-hand with Mischief Maker so definitely recommend checking that one out too! heheh <3

He only stayed during the night.    

When the blanket of darkness covered even the moon with a hazy layer of clouds, leaving tiny twinkling stars for a traveler’s guide. The fire once dancing in the hearth dwindled down to scarlet embers barely emitting enough heat to fill the large quarters.

Not that it mattered.

Even as you lay naked amidst the silken sheets strewn upon the grand bed, the thought of your lover’s return alone was enough to engulf your body in a flame of burning anticipation that settles and simmers between your legs.

He had been gone far too long. A lengthy patrol around the surrounding territories had taken him away from your embrace. Although every morning the sun’s rays tickled your face as a sweet greeting and bathed you in a radiant light through the day, nights without him were by far the worst.    

Cold.    

Lonely.    

Dark.

On usual accounts, it was a grievous crime to keep the queen waiting. But you would forgive him for anything, wouldn’t you? It’s exemplified in the way he bursts through the doors without so much as a courteous knock that even your most trusted servants must abide by, water droplets dripping from his auburn bangs.

Despite the eagerness to see you as soon as possible, he refused to step foot into your chambers when reeking of blood after fierce combat and soiled with dirt from travel. You always protested. The gilded throne you reigned from, the heavy crown upon your head, and even the bed you shared — all were built upon those very foundations. But your lover insisted on only showcasing the glorious side of things to you.

The gold.    

The diamonds.

The luxuries.

All which adorned you by day. Glowing, glistening, and shining. Gems and jewels, fabrics woven from the highest quality quickly reduced to layers that only became a hindrance once it came time for his descent upon you. For you were absolutely beautiful clothed — this he very well knew — but when your whole body was bared naked for him and him alone? You were truly the definition of divine.

Those who dared to speak ill of you tried to foster ridiculous claims. Critical of the wealth in your possession. Mocked what they presumed was a lack of ambition. Wailed that you were a witch. A young monarch on an undeniable downfall to tyranny, one that would lead them all to hellfire and ruin.

Anything to validate that you were not worthy of the royal seal emblazoned across the lands in honor of a valiant leader with a royal bloodline still running through your veins.

Hypocrisy at its finest when you were the reason that they were bestowed or able to retain property linked to their names, money in their pockets, and a legacy to live by under your prosperous reign. Arrogant to cast down the very thing that elevated them to their current standing. But their greed would eventually come back to bite them. One day.

Even the religious sect whispered lowly, hidden in the shadows of the grand temples. Doubts that the king actually held a shred of affection for his partner — if the seldom visits seen visiting your chambers only when night falls were of any substantial evidence to go by. That he only lay with you out of duty, shackled and bound to an imposter who was never a faithful servant to the gods like they were.

Because not one of them truly believed that a god could ever favor, let alone love, a human.

You knew you were a savior to as many as you were also an enemy. A hindrance and a threat. A bold refusal to control or be controlled. There was nothing more to do other than lead your people as fairly as you judged. 

All the preposterous assumptions infuriated him — your devoted knight, unorthodox husband, and scandalous lover. But he manages to temper his fiery rage out of respect for you. Behind your ruthless, steely intent is a righteous and kind heart that always calls out for him, now fully vocalized and embellished by the sweet voice he's missed hearing dearly.

“Seokmin,” you murmur, grasping his warm hand once he's within reach.

An entity of many epithets with an existence worth a millennium beyond comprehension and full of worship. Yet his favorite phonetic combination he'd ever heard was the one that fell breathlessly from your lips. The closest the human tongue could get to a god’s true name. And his second favorite would be yours, the syllables rumbling in his chest like a song and you smiled in contentment.

He was back, he was home, and he was yours.

Even in the darkness, Seokmin glowed. The ethereal radiance surrounding the broad expanse of sinewy muscles easily proved his lofty status as the great god of the sun. But it was also his eyes, flickering with the unmistakable presence as one of many deities. The kind of power that has managed to refrain from turning you into ash and cinders.

Whether it's attributed to your resilience, a ruler born to stand out and lead, or an entirely different reason — or a mixture of all — Seokmin isn't really sure. He's not the first to appear in a human vessel nor the last, with at least twelve of his known brothers wandering the mortal world for various reasons.

He wonders if he's the first to bow his head willingly, though, holding back his more devious and destructive tendencies. To pay back tenfold the worship he's received since the beginning of time all to you — a mere human — yet nonetheless, his queen.

The event of swearing his undying fealty feels like it was yesterday. For a being that persists forever, it may as well have been that short ago. Every memory he etches and sears into his mind for eternity consists of you, and only you.

How could he forget? How was he supposed to bury away the confident smirk that graced your lovely lips? Would he ever not recall the first time he bent the knee in such desperation? Not for a trick or as a dark seduction that tumbles into a dreadful demise, a conquest for carnage, and an abuse of his powers. But instead for the good of humanity — however short of an era it may be.

And maybe… for more. One that his heart fears to admit, for it does not beat within his chest, but in a plane beyond the reach of mortals.

"Would you kill for me?"

"For you, anything," the god affirms. "I have laid waste to kingdoms, countries, empires, and even continents themselves. There is nothing I'm incapable of."

"And if I asked you to behead the entire entourage that has traveled with you?"

"… If it is what you will, then it is simply my command to follow. For you, I am a lone knight at your disposal."

Silken skirts flare out as does your anger when you turn away from the large windows in the tower's tiny excuse of a throne room — hardly fit for the heir — showcasing a brief flash of the lethal dagger strapped to your thigh. "Do you wish for my downfall before I've even risen to the throne? You expect me to be a tyrant, despised by the people I am meant to save? To lead?"

"Do you think I, a god, care what thoughts others conjure up in their silly little minds? I am to act on your behalf, get my hands dirty in lieu of you. No matter how morbid your desires may be."

Stepping closer, you lift his chin with the tip of a dull sword intended to be ornamental. But it may be even deadlier than the one hung at his side, metaphorically sharpened and honed by a rebel princess's innate rage. 

His little show of bowing means little with the way he stares straight at you without a shred of respect in those galaxy-filled irises. However, it is the mighty sun god who is taken aback by the hellfire burning in your gaze, hungry and powerful enough to rival his own as you scoff.

"I will show you what kind of queen this land needs, the methods we will follow, and the morals I wish to uphold. You will learn in order to understand them and enforce my will. Not only to help guide the vision I desire but to keep me accountable lest I stray. A critical misstep such as that is when I'll ask you to cut me down. Will you swear to do that for me?"

"… You dare question a god of what he can do? Your tiny, impudent human mind couldn't fathom a sliver of my capability."

"I dare to question what you can't or won't do."

"I told you, there is not a thing beyond my realm of —"

"Leave."

"… Your Highness?"

Painted lips curl in a snarl at the first address of your proper title since his arrival. "Begone, I said! Return when you feel like acting like the god you are, not simply a tool to be harnessed and used at will. Until then, I have no need for you."

Seokmin's jaw drops as you seat yourself back on the throne with a sneer and flick of your wrist for the guard to usher him out.

A challenge. 

He's been abandoned many times. Discarded and tossed to the side once his usefulness has been expended. He's left before betrayal can even be thought of — for no one points a blade at a god's back — but never has he been rejected.

It was only the beginning of how you would become many of his 'firsts' and all of his 'lasts'.

Seokmin is lost deep in the memory even with the feeling of your lips curling in a gentle smile against his — a stark contrast to your initial meeting. A nail grazes his chin, digging lightly into the skin to fully bring the god back to the present. 

You'd be offended by the habitual spacing out if he hadn't admitted to only getting lost in thoughts of you. Something he'd picked up during the routine patrols away. Though you strive to bring the god out of dwelling in the past when you're sitting right in front of him — the present — and deepen the kiss.

Yet he pulls away to tilt his head. "Do you remember what you offered to me?"

"Have I not offered you my all, my king?"

Charcoal lying dormant in the hearth flares back to life, emitting playful sparks when he chuckles. "After I returned to pledge my loyalty to you."

"Ah, even though I had you wait outside the gates for five days."

"Unfathomable for a god to hang around at the whim of a meager human, isn't it?"

"Meager?"

"To me? Yes." 

His warm exhale of amusement feels just like the breeze that fondly brushes your cheeks every morning despite the eternal humidity. It may very well be him because no matter how far away physically from you he is, Seokmin's essence radiates in every sunray that stretches across the grand skies and below.

He is everywhere and everything all the time. But he is here with you tonight once again, kissing the palm you'd placed on his cheek. With mischief flickering like a teasing flame in his eyes, the god brings your hand to his throat, encouraging you to splay your fingers across his Adam's apple.

You free yourself from his light grasp to run them ticklishly up and down the bumps of his vocal cords. The movements of swallowing ripples beneath the light scratch of your nails until he halts you by replacing a veined hand over yours and murmurs, "Squeeze."

"Ah — but I…"

He repeats it again louder when you fail to do as asked, not even daring to move a muscle. Simply staring in almost awe-filled hesitation until he guides you to tentatively do exactly as he states, "You would have done anything to strangle me back then, what has changed?"

"… You know what."

"Tell me," he says it like it's a command, eyes brightening and swirling with an authoritative amber hue though it's all in jest. "Tell me what it is, my queen."

Never one to be deterred, only Seokmin could render you motionless for so long. You do as you're instructed, the gentle pressure applied by your hand around his throat causes auburn eyelashes to flutter. The slight restriction to an airflow that isn't all that necessary for a god's survival has his eyes rolling back before they re-focus on you, half-hidden by hooded eyelids.

"Love," you murmur. For it is the answer to everything, is it not?

"Love," is echoed with a resounding voice that doesn't fully come from the tongue of the man beneath you, but bellows out from an otherworldly essence that surrounds the entire world and beyond. And at the same time, he speaks it so fondly because ultimately, he's addressing it as a title for you.

The god of the sun, as immortal as he might be, has died before. Mortal vessels manage to persevere for a fixed number of years and a feeble human body can only endure so much wear and tear. Yet Seokmin's soul still shines steadily onwards despite the memory of death over and over again lingering… and he unsurprisingly realizes that he wouldn't mind dying like this — by your hand. 

Was that love? 

But the amount of power, energy, and time, along with the unpredictable wiles of the creator would never guarantee him returning to you. Preservation of this human shell was of the utmost importance, the first time he's ever handled a vessel with care before.

Perhaps that was love.

Rather than be swept up in unpleasantries, he entertains the amusing thought of how much fragility you exercise with him. Having already released your grip far too quickly and instead, fiddle with the untied laces on his loose shirt.

"Love," he repeats, this time as a call in a raspy drawl of his own voice. 

"Hm. Or maybe it was… pity."

An eyebrow raises and the corners of Seokmin's mouth twitch upward. "Only my queen would dare to pity a god."

"It was for what you were. And who you weren't. I despise those uppity, repetitive displays of unwavering loyalty that either party can easily discard."

"Like the former king's imperial court."

"Yes." 

Your angered hiss is exactly the same as the first time you informed him of your plans to take down your father and his cult. The disgust and rage have barely ebbed even after all the progress made for a better future and as many years that have passed. 

Seokmin scans your expressions. He's always admired your spitfire that could rival his own flames. But in times when it burns long enough to possibly exhaust or hurt you, he worries. You're strong — he knows that — so many times he simply becomes the safe space where you can seethe aloud without interruption. 

"Would you rather grow dull and be poisoned because someone is not even worth keeping an eye on or the thrill of unpredictability? A constant sword dance that keeps each other on their toes, never deviating gazes from one another."

He smirks. "That sounds familiar."

You think back to earlier days with him. A stubborn royal and an even more stubborn deity. When did the challenging, pointed glares at one another change to simmering looks of desire?

Instead of your swords tangling together in an angry clash over a small matter, it was your tongues after a heated sparring session. How condescension switched to respect to something more passionate… more primal… more intimate.

"Perhaps so. But look at you now — look at how you shine."

His skin indeed glows a bit brighter as he melts further into the soft touch of your palm returning to his cheek. Thumb tracing constellations between the pair of moles on his cheek while your other finger follows the nearly invisible scar below his eye.

"Little blemishes," he had once told you, "even the body of a god bears its flaws after fighting on a battlefield."

You thought they only made him all the more perfect.

"And look at how I've fallen."

As if to demonstrate his murmured words, Seokmin moves at the speed of light — his normal pace — to lie on his back, umber strands of hair spread out like flames of fire against the grandiose bed's silken sheets.

Somehow, he'd positioned you on top of him. Much accustomed to the tiny displays of omnipotence here and there, you remain unbothered. Affectionately, you brush back his bangs. Fiery wisps of hair that seemingly move on their own accord with the amount of power that ripples through their thin fibers.

He might just be the most powerful among his fellow deities and you could wield all of that as your own because he sits obediently in the palm of your hand. Lays dociley among your silken sheets. What he's trying to prove to you — the hold you have over him — immediately enthralled under your spell as you play with his locks and softly whisper, "You're Seokmin. My Seokmin."

Despite your bare chest quite literally in his face, the god waits. Fully clothed in soft linens where he can feel every tempting pulse thundering in your precious mortal body on top of his. 

And still, he waits. 

His hands don't even reach out as you unlace his shirt. Though he has wrecked and ruined your body in a thrillingly sensual, blistering, and passionate heat of love-making before, tonight he gives himself over to you. Vulnerable and all yours for the taking, watching with faint amusement as you impatiently urge him to shed the rest of his garments.

"My queen."

"My king."

"There is no rush. We have all of eternity."

"Do we?" you breathe out and look him in the eyes as your fingers dance along his inner thigh. "Or is it only you, divine ruler of the everlasting dawn and never-ending night?"

"My graceful moon," Seokmin sighs and distracts you from grasping his weeping shaft, urging you to straddle his legs. You follow his will despite the object of your desires lying neglected between your bodies, coating your stomach in the molten saltiness that drips from it.

"My stars, my sky, my galaxy, my universe." Each title of affection is seared into your skin with a burning kiss to brand your body. Your cheek, your ear, your neck, your shoulder, and your hand. "Without you in it, the world ceases to exist."

"My sun, my warrior, my knight, my shield, and my sword." You repeat a version of your own display of worship and what he means to you — mimicking the same actions across his lithe body. "My love, it would do you good to live in the present with me. Must you think of a dire future so soon?"

"Each inhale of life thus returns an exhale of death. I dread every moment that brings me closer to your end."

"Such morbid thoughts you carry, my darling. Where is the fearless god that took a poisoned arrow to the heart and pulled it out without so much as a flinch?" 

"You think me weak when I'd take the blow of any weapon as long as it does not harm you."

The irony when you'd both been struck by invisible, non-lethal darts fired from the god of love's feathered bow. But the terrifying memory of Seokmin taking the assassination attempt in your place causes a rare, but true, fear twisting in your gut. The flash of life before your eyes changed the trajectory of your tactics and your relationship with the god. And as always he reassures you with what he knows to be the truth — for the most part.

"Nothing can hurt me as long as you're alright." 

"Then make me your goddess in return so that I will be invincible enough to protect you from harm's wrath too." 

"But that… you know I can't," he whimpers, "no matter how much I long to." 

A tear trickles down his cheek, crystallizing when it falls. Like many before and well after, all bodily fluids of the god will be found transformed as various tiny diamonds and gems. Tangled within the bedsheets the following morning as they always are and stored away in the queen's treasury.

Seokmin cries, not just at his frustrations, but at how you gingerly hold his hot and hardened length. Heavy in your palm that rubs and strokes it lovingly before sinking down with practiced ease, having already stretched yourself out earlier while waiting. Undulating your hips in slow, controlled circles that make him dizzy with desire. Your words pierce his chest, paining him like no sword that sliced him open could ever compare.

"If fate will not let it happen, then bury me in the ground so I can thrive beneath your warm rays that whisper sweet nothings. Let me smile up at you after winter passes while I bloom brilliantly through spring and long into the heated days of summer. Weave my soul among the stars so I may greet you in the morning and kiss you goodnight every evening. Scatter my ashes into the windy gusts of the north and down the silver rivers flowing south so I may laugh and dance in the skies alongside your sunbeams."

He sobs at the poignant emotional tug of your words, every poetry waxed by your breathy voice punctuated by a tantalizing undulation of your hips. You reassuringly clench around him, foreheads and bodies pressed together, hands clasped tightly in each other's grasp.

The god's chest heaves and the mountains on the eastern border shift to the left. Sometimes the air cools when this occurs but tonight, it shimmers and glistens as if straining against his commands. A hot wave that threatens to distort the very seam of reality itself. 

"I will always be yours," you kiss the corner of his trembling lips, "and you mine, my darling god."

"My sweet goddess, my everything… my love."

Seokmin's hips buck up anxiously and you let him lead the pace. Wild thrusts take over as he chases that high, wanting and needing to take you over that peak with him. Your body lays prone against him, along for the jostling ride as the god seeks his own pleasure through and with you. Praises and worship fall from his lips, never failing to be in awe of how your cunt molds and works his cock like a blacksmith shapes an iron rod yet he can bully it as he wants to fit him. Only him. 

You were made for the god of the sun.

Golden ichor thrums through his veins, lighting his skin in flashes like the sparks of embers. He's beautiful. Otherworldly. Your lips capture each glowing pulse of godliness that erupts beneath his flesh with a tender peck. He's all yours.

And he was made for you.

When Seokmin plunges into your welcoming warmth that is his alone to claim before he finally succumbs, it's blinding. On the other side of the earth, the sun shines a little brighter. A harsh glint that already emits a sweltering heat from its fiery nature flares even hotter in the blue sky. A blessed priestess looks up in contemplation, waving away the worried maidens who tend to her every need.

You feel his large hands — one presses in a bruising hold between your shoulders, the other on your lower back. Keeping you flush against him, holding your body to his while you welcome inside the scorching spurts of his seed within your womb that feel like lava. Your walls flutter around him and he basks in the feeling of them pulsating as you jerk your hips 

"Come," he begs out. It's loud and resounding. More of an instinctual command if anything and your body almost obeys unwittingly, unaware of his intent before he lifts you up with inhuman strength and clarifies, "Up here," and sits you on your rightful throne — his face, "where you deserve, the queen of queens. My queen. My love. My goddess."

He laps at you like a dehydrated dog. Both cleaning you up and creating an even bigger mess. Your thighs squeeze tightly around the sides of Seokmin's head, one hand tugging harshly at his hair and the other mercilessly wrinkling the silk bed sheets. His moans are sweet songs of praise but muffled as he sucks his release out of your cunt only to push it back inside with his tongue. The addition of globs of spit accompanying the still-hot, smeared mess causes your own sounds to grow much louder, writhing on top of him from the sloppy sensations.

Back and forth he repeats this a couple of times, the firm point of his nose stimulating your sore clit in his efforts. And finally, you come undone — spasming on top of Seokmin's chin and suffocating him just like he likes. Breathing and drowning in your essence, the very elixir of life.

"I shall make you mine," he whispers later, dutifully laying your deliciously aching but clean body onto freshened sheets. Your lover is ever so attentive, rarely nearly needing the same amount of aftercare he showers upon you.

For he is a god from the heavens to bestow blessings upon his desired mortal.

"I am already yours."

"But for all of eternity, it shall be so."

Satiated and content, you reach for him. He lovingly takes your hand and presses a kiss to the tip of each of your fingers. "How?"

"The Mother. She's the closest thing we have to the Creator and might be older than the universe itself. There's nothing she doesn't know so I'm sure she'll have the answers I seek."

"Must you leave so soon?"

Seokmin smiles as he pulls the sheets over your shoulders. "The sun never fails to rise, my dear. I will be back before you know it bringing with me tidings of great news."

"I'll be waiting."

Your shared kiss is soft and gentle. Sweet and full of sentiment. Indeed, you always wait for him and the sun god leaves with a full heart of hope. Little does he know, and little do you suspect, the true one lying in wait was the shadowed figure holding a poisoned dagger beneath their cloak.

And so, with the death of a queen so loved by the god of the sun… the prophecy begins.

onlyseokmins: September 2024 ©

[wings-of-ink]

Mini progress report, some ramblings and Patreon planning

Hello all! I just wanted to drop a note and check in. I haven't been around as much lately as I've had some busy things in my personal life going on (all good things, btw), and they've made me a bit sleepy. I have some asks baking in my inbox, but I will attend to them when I've got the energy saved up.

For now, I am still working on chapter 5 and she is a biggie. I do not know when the update will go through. I had hoped for October, but realistically it will probably be November. I'm giving myself some wiggle room since the season for me is shifting, and I often experience fatigue and some strong-sads when autumn/winter set in. I won't know for sure until it hits if I will be a sleepy mess or not, lol. Sometimes it doesn't hit until December.

Assuming I remain in good humor, I will be doing a lot of writing and testing in the coming days. Around this time last year is when I was finally writing the first chapter of GC. It really helped me get through the winter months, so I hope that this year will be much the same.

In fact, I found when I made the document for the outline and rough draft for the start of our story:

Between here and the very beginning of February 2024, I wrote the prologue and chapters 1 and 2 and then published them. This coming February, we should celebrate our 1 year anniversary, right?

Chapter 5 is coming along well. I've had a couple scenes that I want to go back over and refine since I either forgot something or they just didn't turn out the way I wanted. I have also written out an event that happens in chapter 7 which I am very (unreasonably) excited about. I could not help myself, it was burning a hole in my brain. It will, of course, develop a lot more after I have 5 & 6 actually done, but I can't wait until you get there.

Here is where Chapter 5 stands now:

This looks massive, but keep in mind there are two paths at the beginning of this chapter and each have unique events/consequences. Some of the text is shared here and there between them, and then they meet. This also includes code and such. I am at the mid-point of the chapter currently where there is a bit of downtime and the MC can get up to...a few things.

Such as this tease for a Duri-moment:

Just what are you two up to???

As for Patreon, if anyone is curious, I am still planning. The feedback I got from the poll along with messages and such have helped a lot. I am not sure when I will have things running since I am prioritizing the actual chapter writing while I've been busy with other things. Since my weekly schedule is going to be back to normal now, I can think about it more.

I have determined to take Patreon nice and slow. It will focus on just a few tiers to start (centered on only God-Cursed for the time being). From there, we'll grow things at a sustainable pace. Most were interested in extras (POVs & drabbles), so I will focus on those, early access, and spiciness. I had debated about starting this next year as opposed to, say, November or December. I may just shoot for whenever I have chapter 5 done. I feel like that's a good round place we can branch off from, and it will open up more flexibility in any bonus content I write.

I think that's all of what's been on my mind lately, and I've prattled too long as it is. I hope you are all safe and well!

Take care! ^_^

~ Lunan 🐦‍⬛

[heartofwritiing]

I don’t deserve you, you deserve the world.

paring: cc!wilbur soot x fem!reader

summary: a very drunk wilbur makes a belated confession to you about how he has be feeling lately.

authors note: I literally had this in my drafts since february and forgot about it XD this is two times I've used lyrics of your sister was right as a fic title ahha! this is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only! hope you enjoyyy

warnings: wilbur has negative thoughts about himself (i love writing sensitive boys lol) alcohol consumption, fluff, pet names, wrote wil as a happy little drunk with mood swings, swearing, short, not proofread, unedited!

Wilbur stumbled through his apartment, leaning on a tipsy Joe, who was trying to not let Wilbur bump into anything.

After another very successful gig, the band decided that going out for drinks to end the night was the best thing to do to blow off the adrenaline.

Wilbur had taken one glance at his drink and thought fuck it, with the way his mindset had been, he needed something to numb his brain, even if it was just for a little while, and downed his first drink in one gulp. Letting the alcohol settle into his system.

One drink turned into three, then four, then by his sixth cup he was ready to fist fight a very amused Ash who had truly hadn’t consumed a single drop of alcohol that night.

-

You had been sleeping over at Wilbur's tonight. You said you wanted to see him after his show since you could not make it due to personal circumstances, but you would definitely be at the next lovejoy gig. He told you not to sweat about it and told you he wouldn't be home not too long after the performance.

Luckily Ash had messaged you notifying you that Wilbur would be home late due to getting drinks as a post show ritual after-party. You didn't mind, the band was getting more recognition which they deserved. He was so endlessly talented that he should have the right to celebrate the success along with his bandmates. So it was no surprise that around 11:40 pm you heard noises coming from the front room. You crawled out of your comfy position in Wilbur's bed and pushed yourself to the living room.

You then walk in on Joe kneeling over Wilbur who had fallen to the ground and was giggling incoherently about something. Joe had taken one sympathetic look at you and said “he’s all yours” offering Wilbur's hand to you that was clutching his wrist.

You bid goodnight to the boys, You waved to Mark and Ash who watched the interaction from the front doorway. When they shut the door behind them it was just you and Wilbur in in silence.

Glancing down at Wilbur you couldn’t help the smile that stretched across your face at his state. His hair was disheveled, and his shirt was unbuttoned at the top revealing his skin, and he looked so sleepy you felt so bad. He tried to pull himself off the ground, but he tripped over his feet, nearly causing you to topple over him. Luckily you caught yourself before you could fall.

Wilbur looked up at you his lips had the cutest pout resting on them but he shifted into a dopey grin upon realizing you were holding his hand. He was lifting your connected hands up like he was seeing you for the first time.

"darling! What are you doing here?" his voice was hoarse as he spoke, you knew it was the singing and the exhaustion catching up with him finally.

He must've forgotten in all the mist of the evening that you were staying over. Nonetheless, you didn't blame him, he had a pretty busy night.

Wilbur leans forward to attach himself to your waist, wrapping his free arm around your hip and pressing his face into your tummy. Warmth increased on your face at the gesture. Wilbur pressing so close to you made butterflies burst in your chest, which you didn’t mind at all he was being so clingy.

"I told you I wanted to stay over tonight, remember?" you said gently, carding your fingers through his locks. He hummed almost like a cat purring at your touch, nuzzling you further. "is that okay with you? I can leave?"

"no!" he instantly gripped your waist tighter, not wanting you to leave. "please, stay."

"Okay! I'll stay," You giggle, feeling his arms untighten slightly. "Let's get you into bed, yeah?"

Wilbur nods against your belly, and you pull him to stand up.

“I don’t deserve you..” he mumbled in your ear as he leaned on your for support had you walked to his bedroom. You didn’t quiet catch it you thought he was muttering something incoherent to himself. You shook of the frown

In his bedroom you help him to take off his shoes while he stumbles and almost tips over his feet. He mostly got himself undressed and put on his pajamas, which were just an old band shirt and sweatpants. Both of you crawled into bed with the hopes he would sleep off this drunken high and be his old self again in the morning.

Wilbur was curled into your side pulling you so close under the covers. You ran your hands through his hair as he blinked up at you.

“Darling do you love me?” he asked sincerely.

Your brain did a one-eighty with the tender tone of his voice. From his comment a minute ago to now this, It almost sounded like he had doubts about your feelings. You pulled back from him slightly so you could see him. exhaustion written all over his face.

“Of course I love you bub,” you reassured. “Why would you think I don’t?”

He looked away from you shyly like a kid who had gotten in trouble for doing something they knew was wrong. His hand came up to trace along the bottom of your shirt when it caught attention his eye.

“Well… sometimes I don’t think I'm good enough for you, that I have always not been good, and I'm scared that one day you’ll leave me just like everyone has in my life.”

Your heart sank at his drunken confession, but you could tell it was coming from a place of trueness and insecurity. It completely shattered you to hear this coming from Wilbur. Who was so wonderful and beyond anything you ever hopped for. To hear that he doubted himself and your relationship brought tears to your eyes. Your feelings for him were more than fondness, you loved him with everything you were and you couldn’t let him leave your life. he was your light at the end of the very dark tunnel, and you would just have to show him that.

“I'm too busy with my band, with my streaming, I feel like I neglect you too much, and I want you to have something better than all of this,” his lips slightly quiver. He moves to lower his head and bury it in your chest. However, you stop him with your hands coming up to gently cup around his face, to make him look you in the eyes. His eyes widened and his hands followed yours to grasp your face the same way in his woozy state. It was comical and made you smile at how he was trying to mimic your own action.

“I love you more than anything Wil, you’re so kind, supportive in everything I do, and- I would be so lost without you. I wouldn’t trade you for anyone else. You’re more than enough for me. You’re everything. I would never leave you, not even if you kicked me out of your life I am always gonna be here for you. nothing is ever gonna change that.” You let your heart take over with your words.

Wilburs eyes lit up and gloss over with tears, the contentment of your words hitting him through his senses making him break out into a dopey grin.

“Do you really mean that, love?” he croaks.

You nod.

He lets out a shaky breath and pulls you closer to him until your legs are intertwined.

“I know I'm super drunk right now and probably won’t remember much of this tomorrow but, I love you too, thank you for saying those nice things about me.“

You giggled and pulled him in for a short kiss to seal your own confession.

“I’ll gladly say them again.”

You pampered his face with kisses until he was a bright red giggling mess copying you, delivering even more kisses to your face. Once you finished, the small lamp on the bedside was turned off, and you succumbed to darkness, intertwining your limbs once more to settle down.

Sleep was just about to take over you when Wilburs slurred voice suddenly teased out to you through the dark.

“So what else do you love about me?”

“oh shut up,” you laugh.

-

Im gonna be starting a new tag list so please commet/reblog if you want to be added!

[steamberrystudio]

07/07/2024 Tumblr Devlog

Hallo everyone!  Time for the tumblr update! Whii~iich I think I may have skipped a couple - it looks like I did that annoying thing where I wrote up an update and *forgot to post it*. 

Sorry about that! 

So what have I been doing lately? Well. Lemme tell ya.

I wrote 23,000 words this week, for one. I am ded. ┗( T﹏T )┛

But let's jump into the details because in the most recent update I see, I was still revising chapter 10.

Summary:

Finished revising, proofreading, and formatting chapter 10

Revised Asher ending sequence

Revised Daaz ending sequence

Finished drafting Kav's endings sequence

Finished drafting Noel's ending sequence

Finished drafting Raif's endings sequence

Worked on a ton of UI changes and improvements

Worked on some sprite tweaks

Received some new BG art!

Writing:

So as you can see, lots of writing progress since my last update. 

I finished revising chapter 10 and coding it. It turned out to be 88,000 words coded.

I revised and formatted Asher and Daaz's ending sequences into the game. Those two were already drafted and just needed to be cleaned up and put into Renpy.

The remaining four character still needed to be drafted but I had paused to revise the entire script so I could make some necessary plot fixes before I tried to draft the remaining endings. 

With that done, I've moved into finishing up the draft.

Currently I have Kav, Noel, and Raif drafted and Yren in progress.

And that will be all the main game content complete!

The current un-coded word count amount is 625,000 words. 💪

Art:

So I have completed some CG work since my last update but the main thing I've been working on art-wise is UI updates and changes. 

A lot of small changes to the general aesthetic as well as implementing a lot of small additions I've been contemplating for a while as QoL improvements.

Such as a little indicator that shows when you are in a "character branch" and things like that.

I've also made a few small tweaks to some of the sprites - mostly just making their expressions a little more dramatic since they were reading a bit flat to me. And, of course, adding new outfits. Always new outfits. LoL

And of course, new BGs from both artists.

Background are around 76% complete currently.

Other Stuff:

I guess UI goes in here too since in addition to the "art" aspect, there's the implementation aspect as well.

Once you change the look of something that has to be coded in, of course. 

I ended up deciding that I want to experiment with moving the sprites around a bit more - mostly moving them a bit closer and then further away depending on the scene, what's happening, and how many characters are on screen in a given moment.

There are several benefits to this including keeping the screen from being static for long periods but also, there are a couple of characters that the player will really benefit from being able to see their faces up close (mostly Raif and Yren).

So yeah - in addition to redesigning some of the screens, I have also been implementing those changes bit by bit.

The game definitely looks quite different now. I recently saw a playthrough of the current prototype that's on Itch and was astonished because I forgot how it looked when it was first released. Ha ha. It's gone through a lot of changes. 

Noel no longer matches the ceiling, for one! Amazing.

Upcoming Weeks:

I will be working on finishing up Yren's ending sequence and hope to get that done in the upcoming week - which means another heavy writing week. 

As I've said elsewhere, I have been calling them "ending sequences" but in reality this is the last three chapters of each route which is about 20,000 words total for each character. I have about 3000 words of Yren's done and I'm actually only shooting for about 15,000 for the rough draft because I invariable add dialogue and variations when I edit, which means I have to undershoot the draft so I don't overshoot the word count during revision.

So yeah, I'll be completing Yren's final three chapters, then revising Kav, Noel, Raif, and Yren and formatting them into the game, which will give me the "final" word count for the project.

And then I will be "done" with the writing (in quotes because...you're never done with the writing until it releases. LoL

I should definitely be done with drafting and revising by my next update here but I can't really say what I'll be working on by that point. Probably...UI and CGs. Not sure.

We'll find out in the future I suppose! See you then!

[blushblyme]

One Admiral's Daughter (Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Reader)

Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Simpson!Reader

Summary: Of all the people in the bar, Bradley's eyes decided to set themselves on a forbidden fruit.

Warnings: Light cursing, sexual innuendos (but nothing happens really), fluff, sexual tension

Words: 4,107

Author's Note: I whipped this out of my brain the last minute because I thought that it has been months since I wrote and this has been in my drafts for as long as I can remember. I hope you like it :')

Damn, it's bitter. You thought as the warm remains of the vodka scratched your throat. You shoved the glass away from you as you stared at it with so much hate.

"What did the glass do, dear?" Penny asks as she places a cold glass of beer in front of you. You groaned as you leaned away from the counter.

"I'm bored, Pen. Why can't I just work for you?"

Penny smiles, "You know I can't hire you, that's an order from your Dad."

You rolled your eyes and sighed. Your dad always loved to ruin everything for you. You never know how he always knew what you were doing despite him being really busy with his work. Sometimes, you'd even think he had been sending someone to spy on you when he was not around. "Fine, I guess I'll just sit here and try not to go mad with boredom."

Penny ruffled your hair as she chuckles. "Silly, why don't you just go to your office or the base to kill your time?"

You shook your head. "First, office hours are 'till 1 pm only, and second, Dad's office is too quiet for me. The Hard Deck is literally the only place that's keeping me sane, Pen."

"Well, what about you go dancing now since it's almost 7pm and customers are already flooding in? Maybe you could get yourself a dance partner or something."

You grimaced. "No, thanks. I'd rather stay here and keep myself company."

"See? You won't even lift your butt out of that chair," She shakes her head, "I'll go take some orders now. Ring me up when you need more." She adds as she tapped the side of your beer mug.

You smiled at Penny before drinking from your beer again. It's going to be a long night.

"Hey, Rooster. Check her out," Payback elbows Rooster on the stomach as Rooster looks at where he was pointing.

"I love me a woman in red." Payback adds as he continues to look respectfully at the girl on a red sundress by the bar counter.

Rooster shrugged. "What about it?"

"What do you mean what about it, man? She's hot."

"How do you know that? You haven't even seen her face." Rooster punches his friend's chest lightly before looking in the girl's direction again. This time, the girl was already facing their direction, talking to a stranger with a beautiful smile on display.

Rooster forgot to breathe for a second. "What about now?" Payback asks Rooster as if he'd sensed his friend's sudden change of heart.

"You wanna know what I think?"Rooster asks, eyes still on the girl, "Hold my beer." He shoves his beer mug onto Payback's chest as he made his way to the stage.

"Oh, come on, man! I don't like where this is going." Payback groans as he saw Rooster grab a microphone.

Rooster then made his way to the jukebox to type in a song. "Trust me, Payback, " He says as the song starts, tapping Payback's chest before making his way toward his target. "This is how you get a girl."

As you drank your second beer of the night, you suddenly felt a hand on your shoulder. "Excuse me, miss," You turned to see who it was and saw an unfamiliar man with a mustache who had a Hawaiian shirt on with a white tank top underneath.

Your brows furrowed in confusion when another man shoved him aside. "I'm sorry, miss. He's just drunk--" His words got cut off when the mustached-man shoved him aside as well.

"I've never seen you looking so lovely as you did tonight, I've never seen you shine so bright," He sings, stepping much closer to you. You chuckled, looking around as you saw people gather around your space to watch him sing.

"I've never seen so many men ask you if you wanted to dance, They're looking for a little romance, given half a chance, and I have never seen that dress you're wearing or the highlights in your hair that catch your eyes, I have been blind;" He continues, as he points at you accompanied with his dramatic gestures as he sang.

You continued watching him sing since he had a wonderful voice to begin with and people started to sing with him. He then grabs a rose from a bouquet he saw at a random table, handing them to you before he concluded his song.

You gladly accepted the rose from him as he smiled in victory, mindlessly handing the microphone to his friend from earlier. "You've got a nice voice, do you sing like that to every woman you see?"

Rooster chuckles as he pulls a seat for himself. "Just the pretty ones."

"Well, how many were they?"

"Just one."

"Oh, so that makes me the second one?"

"No, the first one. I've never actually done this before," He laughs, grabbing a beer from the counter as he drank on it. "Y'know, It's crazy how I went through that just to get your name." He adds, making you giggle in response.

"You could've just asked," You shrugged, extending your hand toward him. "I'm (Y/N) Simpson."

You saw him wince at your response. "What's wrong?" You asked.

"Nothing, it's just...I've never thought of the chances of me dealing with another Simpson for today, you know?"

You tilted your head in curiosity. "Oh, you could tell me about it."

"Over beer?" He asks as he places an empty bottle on the counter. You grabbed him another cold one and placed it right in front of him. "Yup, over beer."

He muttered a small thanks as he drank before speaking. "Well, we have this superior officer at work who can be insufferable at times. Last time, he made us train 'till the wee hours of the night and uhm...I'd love to tell you more, but I think I've stressed out how much of a jerk he can be sometimes."

You leaned back against your chair and shook your head. "That sucks, like what are they? a god or something?"

"Of the Navy I suppose, he's an Admiral." He replies, making everything make sense to you.

"So, I take it that you're from the Navy." He nods. "So, you're a pilot?" You asked as he nods again, making you smile mischievously. You realized that he was actually talking about your Dad so you decided to get the whole gossip from him without him suspecting anything.

"You know what? Tell me more about this Admiral Simpson. Get it out of your chest." You encouraged him as you leaned closer to listen more carefully. He didn't seem to realize what you were doing so he continued to speak ill about your Dad the whole night.

There were times that you agreed with what he said since your dad was a bit annoying, and there were times that you'd laugh at their experiences during their training. Overall, the night became less boring when Bradley stepped in.

"So, this is it, huh? When can I see you again?" He asks as he leans his arm beside your waist, his height towering over your seated figure.

You tilted your head as you smiled at him. "I think we'll be seeing each other more often, Bradley. You can count on it." You winked at him before pushing him away gently by his chest, leaving the bar and leaving him wanting more.

The next day, you decided to spend the rest of your day at your dad's office since you just got off of work and The Hard Deck was still closed. "You could've just stayed home, (Y/N)." Your dad says as he busies himself with his paperwork.

You sat on his guest couch as you reached for the hidden stash of fashion magazines underneath his wooden center table. "It's too boring at home, dad. I promise to be on my best behavior here." You replied as you flipped the colorful pages of the magazines.

"You better be." He adds before he calls his assistant. "Yes, sir?"

"Call Lieutenant Bradshaw and Lieutenant Seresin to my office."

The assistant then leaves as you looked at your dad. "Are they gonna be here for long, dad?"

He looks up at you for a brief second before he flips the pages of his paperwork. "No, I just have to tell them something. I don't want to hear any word from you over there, am I clear?"

You rolled your eyes as you grinned wickedly, giving your dad a small salute. "Yes, sir."

As you scanned the pages of your magazine, you found an interesting read about bags, practically hiding half of your face with your magazine. You heard the door open as you saw two large figures enter the room through your peripheral vision.

"Well, gentlemen. I just want to tell you that you have done a good job on this mission," You heard your dad say as you continued to read, not minding their praise stories about some mission.

"And of course, there will be another special training detachment that both of you and the rest of the Dagger Team will execute. It will take place 3 weeks from now and I'll have Maverick relay the rest of the details of this mission. For now, I want both of you to lead the team in exercises."

"Yes, sir!" They replied in unison, making you look up at them in irritation.

Your irritation suddenly turned into fascination as you saw who it was. Bradley. He was standing upright and proper in front of your father on his flight suit. You grinned as you closed the magazine you were reading, propping your head on your hand as you crossed your legs in the process.

Oh, how you couldn't wait to see the look on his face when he notices you. As your father dismissed them, they turned in your direction to head to the door and Bradley stopped in his tracks when he spotted you.

You swiftly glanced at your dad who was currently busy signing his paperwork before turning your eyes toward him again as you waved at him and gave him a smile. A flash of realization washed over him as he walked out of the office with heavy footsteps.

Bradley looked like he had seen a ghost as he walked away from the Admiral's office. "Hey, Bradshaw. What's wrong with you?" Hangman asks, snapping him out of his thoughts.

Instead of answering, Bradley only shakes his head before he continues to walk away from Hangman. He couldn't believe it. He just couldn't believe that he was talking shit about the Admiral to the person who turned out to be his superior officer's daughter.

He mentally punched himself as he headed to the ready room before slumping himself on the couch to sulk the whole afternoon. The last thing he wanted was to ruin his career by dallying with an Admiral's daughter.

You, on the other hand, asked permission from your Dad to go out and get some fresh air. You actually just wanted to roam the corridors and explore the whole base without your dad appointing someone to chaperone you all throughout your exploration.

You still grinned at Bradley's reaction when he saw you at your dad's office. Where could he be right now? You thought, peeking at every room you passed by, hoping to see him at least.

You saw a room in the corner with a half-opened door. You headed straight to it before peeking inside. Your lips curled up in a smile as you quietly pushed the door open upon realizing who was in the room.

"So, Lieutenant Bradshaw, huh?" You spoke as you closed the door behind you, making him get up from the couch as he looks at you in shock.

"What are you doing here?"

You placed a hand on your chest and acted as if you were offended by his question. "What am I doing here? Am I not allowed to visit a friend?" With your emphasis on friend, he cleared his throat before he stood from the couch.

"Look, last night was a mistake. I didn't mean all of that." He stutters as you make your way toward him slowly with your arms crossed on your chest.

"Even the part that you found me pretty?"You whined, making him sigh in return as you giggled at his reaction. "We both know that it wasn't a mistake, but don't worry. I won't tell on you," You added as you took some steps back to lean on the door to block the exit.

"Good. Because that won't happen again." He says as he walks in your direction. You stood your ground on the door as you continued to stare at his towering figure.

"You're leaving? So soon?" You knitted your eyebrows together as you looked up at him with an innocent doe-eyed look.

Bradley sighs in frustration as he ran his hand through his hair. "Please move away from the door, miss." He says, making you pout at the sudden honorifics.

You sighed as you trailed your hand up his chest, tracing your fingers on the patches of his fight suit as he looked at you with dark, brooding eyes. "Why don't you make me, Lieutenant?"

He closed his eyes as he clenched his jaw before grabbing your wandering hand on his chest. "It's best if you leave me alone, miss. It would be better for the both of us." He says before pushing you gently aside as he hurriedly exits the room.

It has been like that for months. Bradley ignoring you and you trying to get his attention. You would even show up in your dad's office in a sundress on a daily basis, the ones that your dad had claimed "had a shortage of fabric", but you didn't care. The moment Bradley saw you on it, you knew how it affected him since he couldn't take his eyes off you when you roamed around the base.

It was starting to frustrate you when you couldn't get him to look at you or even talk to you. Sometimes, you'd even follow him around just to coax a reaction from him or get him to talk, but he always acted like you weren't there.

One day, you've decided that you've had enough of his indifference and devised a plan to corner him.

"Lieutenant Bradshaw, Admiral's office, now." Bradley heard the assistant say as he leaves the ready room to head to the Admiral's office. When he arrived, the door was wide open, and he proceeded to enter the room.

He sat on the chair in front of the Admiral's table. The Admiral wasn't there or in any corner of his office. His brows knitted in confusion before he heard the door close and the lock click. He turned back and saw you walking towards him with a sultry smile.

"The Admiral's not here. He's on sick leave, but I promised to take care of things that I can handle." You said, moving your dad's name plaque to the side before hopping to sit on the table as you crossed your legs, revealing an ample amount of skin in Bradley's view.

"Why did you call me here? Do you have any idea what you're doing?"He stands as he glanced at the door as if he was afraid of someone walking in on both of you.

"Relax, I locked it." You giggled. "Besides, what do you think I'm doing? I called you here to ask you about something," You tilted your head at him. "Unless you thought---" Bradley quickly cut your words off with his.

"I wasn't thinking that!" He retorted almost too quickly.

You sighed before waving your hand in front of his face to dismiss the unruly topic. "Enough of that. Why have you been ignoring me, Bradley? I've been talking to you for months now but you're always acting like I'm not there."

"I'm not obligated to talk to you, miss." He replies curtly, making you gasp.

"After all we've been through--"

"We've been through nothing, okay? Because we were never friends nor lovers. I don't know what you've planted in your mind to make you even think that we had something." He said. You hopped off the table as you took a step closer to him.

"You know what? You're such a jerk." You spat before leaving the room in a haste, heading home to drown yourself in tears and in vodka.

Bradley stood there as he composed himself, internally applauding himself for holding himself back and mentally punching himself for saying those things to you.

These past few months, Bradley had been trying to avoid you since he didn't want to spark an issue that he was interested in an Admiral's daughter. Even with your advances towards him, he was holding on to his patience for dear life not to drag you inside of a room and ravish you.

He just couldn't, he can't risk his career for this. Knowing Admiral Simpson's character, he personally wouldn't let it slide if he found out about Bradley's feelings for his daughter. Keeping that in mind gave him somewhat of a reason not to even touch a single strand of your hair.

Two weeks passed and Bradley's mind was a mess. You stopped coming over to your Dad's office and you weren't at the bar, too. He started to wonder where you might be. His wonders managed to get in the way of his training as well and it caught Maverick's attention.

He approached Bradley who was sitting on the couch with his head on both of his palms. "Hey, Brad. Talk to me. What's going on with you?" Maverick sits beside him as he places his hand on Bradley's back.

"I'm fine, Mav. Don't worry about it." He says, running both of his hands through his hair before burying his face in his palms again.

"I wouldn't be asking if you are. You've been distracted during training for a while now. Talk to me, what's going on?"

Bradley sighs. "I...I kind of got involved with someone."

Maverick's eyes widened. "You got someone pregnant?"

"No, I didn't. God, Mav." Bradley groans as Maverick sighs in relief. "Oh, thank god. Then who did you got involved with?"

"(Y/N)."

"Well, she seems to be a nice girl. What's the problem?"

"Well, the problem is, she's Admiral Simpson's daughter. I can't get involved with an Admiral's daughter."

To Bradley's surprise, Maverick burst out laughing. Bradley looked at him in confusion. "You know, you might not be my son, but you sure take after me, too."

"What does that mean?"

Maverick calms himself before speaking. "Well, back in my prime, I was involved with an Admiral's daughter, too. It didn't get me in any sort of trouble like what you currently have in mind, but it did appear on my record."

"Your point is?"

Maverick taps Bradley's shoulder. "The point is, you might be worrying for nothing. It's not like you have plans on hurting the Admiral's daughter, right?"

Bradley shakes his head in response. "I don't, but it can hurt my career, Mav."

"Well then, you pick. Pursue the girl with clean intentions and be happy with her or be a mess like this forever and be the one to hurt your career because you wouldn't be able to think straight anymore."

"Are you saying I should risk it?"

"Well, if you're fine with waiting for 30 years to take her dad out of the picture, then don't risk it."

Bradley chuckles. "30 years? Who the hell waits that long, Mav?"

Maverick shrugged. "I did." Bradley leans back in surprise. "You know who the Admiral's daughter is?"

"No way.."

"That's right, It's Penny Benjamin." Maverick smiles to himself as he looks at Bradley.

"There's no way I'm going to wait that long, Mav." Bradley stands from his seat as Maverick did, too. "Go for it, son." He tapped Bradley's shoulder before Bradley ran out of the ready room, thinking about the places you might be at the moment.

Good thing he knew just where to look.

You brushed your hair as you looked at yourself in the mirror. Was I not attractive enough? You thought. You didn't really know what to think at the moment. You did everything in your power to get him, but he didn't want to.

You sighed as you rolled your eyes and thought that it was his loss anyway. While you were deep in your thoughts, you heard a loud thump on your balcony as you were brushing your hair.

You quickly grabbed something random from your dresser as you stood up, making your way toward the curtained balcony. You gasped in horror when a tall, broad, hooded man pushed the curtains aside and made himself known before you.

You threw the thing you were holding toward him, which turned out to be a wooden hairbrush, that hit him on the head. "Ow, what was that for?" The mysterious man winced in pain.

Your brows creased in confusion. That voice, it's familiar.

"W-Who are you and what the hell are you doing here?!"You asked, grabbing your unplugged hair straightener as you pointed it at him. The man pushed his hoodie back and revealed who he was.

It was Bradley.

However, since you were still furious with him, you threw the thing you were holding at him anyway. This time, he was able to dodge it as he looked at you with a baffled expression. "What the hell are you doing in my room and how did you even get past the guards?"

Bradley shrugged. "I have my ways," He took a step closer as he sighed. "I'm here to talk to you."

"There's nothing to talk about, okay? You made it perfectly clear that I meant nothing to you---"

"Okay, I didn't mean it, okay? I didn't mean all of it. I just...I was scared that maybe you're just flirting with me and I didn't want to risk my career for nothing, but I really can't stop thinking about you. You keep messing with my head and--"

You crossed your arms, leaning beside the intercom in your room. "Do you really expect me to believe that?"

Bradley sighed as he pointed at the balcony. "I think I've proven myself well enough, considering the fact that I could've died down there in the hands of your guards."

"It's not my fault you snuck in like a thief," You said as you pushed yourself away from the wall, making your way toward him. "Is that all you have to say for yourself?" You added, trailing your hand up his chest to his nape, making him look down at you.

"Well, I..uh..I want to ask you out on a date.." He mindlessly said as he drowned himself in your eyes. God, you were beautiful. He thought.

"That was the lamest thing I've ever heard." You giggled before pulling him in for a deep kiss. He pulled you in, gripping your waist for dear life.

The kiss was passionate and all that both of you didn't notice that the door suddenly opened, revealing your dad and his fuming disposition. You immediately broke the kiss and gently pushed Bradley away as both of you composed yourselves.

"What. is. the. meaning. of. this?!"

Your eyes widened at your dad's exasperated question as you looked at Bradley. "I must've accidentally pressed the intercom button earlier."

"It's okay, I'll talk to him." He gave you a small smile before you sighed and cursed yourself.

"You, young man. Out. You're going to explain yourself in detail how and why the hell are you in my house and why on earth would you even dare touch my daughter." Bradley nodded slightly as he walked towards the door.

"Dad--"

"You stay out of this, (Y/N). I'll talk to you later." Your dad said with finality in his voice, slamming your door shut.

You sighed as you bit your lip, remembering the kiss from earlier,

What an idiot, he could've just went straight to the entrance and talked to your dad. Instead, he settled with the thought of sneaking in the Admiral's home; worse, inside the Admiral's daughter's room and was caught red-handed.

You smiled at his idiotic ways and laid in your bed, thinking about what could happen to Bradley.

Surely, he wouldn't be subjected to any torture or any sorts of punishment.

This arrangement was bound to happen anyway whichever ways he could have done it.

[crumpetz]

Are You ok? I'm worried

I am okay! Don't worry! This goes out to everyone in the past months who's sent something like this too. I'm sorry I never replied. I was tired, saved it for later, and then forgot. If i seem like i'm blowing you off, this is probably the reason every time :')

I was putting off giving much detail, cuz i didn't want to share so much about my personal life that it felt burdensome for ppl just there to read i guess? but being vague is actually having the opposite effect so, if you don't wanna know, please skip this!

what's been going on with me is mostly a connective tissue disorder i've had since i was born, and it's the kind of thing that gets worse over time. around my last update of Big Road Home, it had one of those "getting worse" checkpoints.

i lost a lot of strength and dexterity in my hands, meaning there are some days typing isn't doable. i've had all these new food allergies and sensitivities, so a lot of my life is just in the kitchen trying to make food i can eat without reacting. i had to go off my pain meds cuz they were making the food reactions worse, so i've been spending a lot of my life managing pain (it's been surprisingly good, btw, it's just time consuming). i also had covid again, and the long-covid brain fog is so bad this time :'''( i'll be halfway through writing a sentence and forget what i just wrote and where i was going with it.

written out like this, i'm aware this seems like a lot. and it is. but i really don't want anyone to feel burdened by it. i'm not trying to do toxic positivity on myself or anyone else. i just see all this, PERSONALLY, as part of my life? like most adults have jobs they have to go to, my job that i have to go to is taking care of my body, which is trying really hard to do what i ask of it (i think working in childcare may have influenced how i think of it lol for me my body is a tired toddler and i gotta be proud of it for just showing up).

i've had these problems all my life, so i got most of the frustration out about it when i was a kid/teen. now, i've trained myself to view new limitations as a quest to find out how i'll adapt to living with that. and sometimes i do get scared i won't succeed on the quest (pain management, i'm looking at you) but so far, i've been very lucky with finding things that work for me.

all that is to say, i'm fine, just taking my time. thanks to everyone who's asked or reached out to me <3

(and just a note about the fic for anyone wondering: i'm trying to have multiple chapters ready before updating Big Road Home because otherwise there will be a cliffhanger without a quick follow-up. but the parts i'm at just happen to be when my rough drafts get really rough and are missing entire scenes because those parts were so complicated that i was saving them for later. jokes on me that i'd have brain fog when that later arrived ;v; wish me luck)

[wannabevampire]

hello my vampires!

it’s allie! i don’t know how many of you remember me (goodness knows i don’t blame you considering i’ve been gone for TWO YEARS!!). but in case you forgot i use to write fanfics on here! mainly marvel, i was probably most known for writing fics about druig and matt murdock!

my life has changed A LOT since then. i moved across the country, started studying at my dream school in my dream program (#allieinstem), lived in THREE different apartments and dealt with oh so much roommate drama, became a bit of a party girl for a moment, worked a lot of different jobs, and fell in love :)

as we all know the world has FINALLY woken up and realized how hot Barry Keoghan is!! and a few weeks ago i caught myself thinking “huh i wonder what happened to that old tumblr account i ran that had over a thousand followers where i was a complete whore on the internet and wrote fan fics constantly??”.

i “abandoned” this account over two years ago, but I still think about it every now and then. i left suddenly and without notice for a multitude of reasons, but without getting too specific i was going through some insanely drastic life changes and my mental health wasn't the best.

I have retyped this post so many times because I'm not sure what to say! But I've been thinking about this account and how much it meant to me. As well as remembering my wonderful mutuals who were always so sweet, funny, and supportive <3

life has been really tough recently, not bad just…hard. and i remember how cathartic this community was for me. i’ve mentioned this before, but english is my second language and my writing has always been a huge insecurity of mine. and yet I felt so welcomed here and it gave me so many opportunities to write for fun!

to see that my fics, blurbs, and slutty fantasies are still being reblogged is so crazy and it makes me very happy! i'm not sure if i'll start writing again but i guess we’ll see :)

(regardless i might reblog a bunch of my old druig/barry content because of the current barry renaissance lol)

side note: went through my drafts and found an old matt murdock fic that i never posted???? it’s like 3.5k words lol and it's almost finished. so weird seeing my old work but like…should i post??

if you remember me at all or are interested in my old work please reach out to me! mutual, nonnie, follower, literally anyone!! i’d love to see how this little corner of the internet is doing <3

as always…

xoxo,

allie 🕊️

p.s. I have such a strong urge to reach out to my old mutuals who are still active because you guys are all such talented writers but I don't know if that would be weird since it's been so long! ahh!!! should I?? please say hi!!!

p.p.s should i post that matt murdock fic??

[jammatown919]

At Last

This is another thing that's been sitting in my drafts basically done for a few months now. Was talking to my friend about how it would be cool if the Spirit World was a legit afterlife and it would be interesting but really sad if the Avatars were kept separate, then I wrote this at 2am and promptly forgot about it.

-----

By now, Kyoshi had been away from Rangi longer than she'd been with her. She'd been here longer than she'd been alive, actually.

Where here was, she didn't exactly know. Some space only accessible to the ghosts of Avatars long past and, on occasion, the current Avatar, who seldom graced them with her full presence. Instead, they watched her life play out like a performance, chiming in where they could, but often serving as little more than her captive audience. How lucky they were. 

It wasn't the current Avatar's fault. Kyoshi actually quite liked the fierce young Korra, for all that she could like someone she'd spoken to once and only once. Korra was mostly Aang's in the way Kyoshi had been mostly Kuruk's, but they were all shackled to her and would be until the end of her life, at which point she would join them as prisoners of her successor. 

It was a miserable fate, one Kyoshi had no idea she'd be subjected to until it happened. Some Avatars carried the burden with grace, as they had in life, but Kyoshi's Avatarhood had been anything but graceful. Why should her afterlife be any different? She hated it here, and she wasn't afraid to let it be known. 

All the Avatars knew how she felt, and still would even if she hadn't screamed it for years upon her first arrival. They could feel each other in some strange way, like they were all part of the same organism that some of them, namely her, would love nothing more than to break away from. 

No one spoke much. Yangchen and Kuruk had entertained her when she was new, as she'd done for Roku when he was new, but when stuck together until the end of time, people tended to run out of things to say. 

So Kyoshi did nothing at all. She simply drifted, lost in memories, wishing and wishing that she could leave, or that her loved ones could join her, or that anything of meaning would happen to her. 

She got her wish seventeen short years into the Era of Korra. The cycle broke and started anew, leaving everyone but the poor soul who hadn't yet joined them behind it. At long last, they were free. 

They were still together when they reappeared, torn from what had been their home for so long and tossed into the real Spirit World, but there was no need to stay that way. Some left immediately, off to find loved ones or just see something new for once, but others stuck around to say goodbye. 

Kyoshi nodded to Roku. Shook Kuruk's hand. Gave Yangchen a hug. 

Then she was running, faster than she ever had in life, toward something she hadn't felt in centuries. It was her own dear heart, beating somewhere far away, still waiting after all this time. Kyoshi couldn't wait to see her again. 

However, it was not Rangi that made her stop. Instead, it was a trio of spirits; a winged snake resting atop a living rock, beside what appeared to be a cloud of sand and pebbles. She recognized them all instantly, and they recognized her. They had become something new, but they had not forgotten what they had once been. 

Her parents, she had no interest in. Perhaps one day - there was all the time in the world, after all - but not today. But Lek... she couldn't just pass him by. 

"Hello, brother," she murmured. The other two seemed to realize she was not here for them and backed away, leaving her room to approach the boy she'd hardly known and yet managed to love and miss so fiercely. 

He changed as she drew nearer, becoming the scrappy young Earthbender he'd been when they were still alive. 

"It's been a while, sister," he replied. He stepped forward and embraced her. 

"I've missed you." She was too tall to even rest her chin atop his head, so she just squeezed him tight. "The others...?"

"Kirima and Wong are always nearby," he said. "Topknot hangs around sometimes. She's not here now, though."

Kyoshi snorted upon hearing Rangi's old nickname. She'd almost forgotten it entirely. She wondered how many things had slipped her mind over the years. 

"I have to go to her," Kyoshi said. "I'll come back to see you again, but I have to go to her now."

"We all understand," Lek promised, and released her. "When you come back, will you talk to them?"

He didn't look at them, but Kyoshi knew he meant her mother and father. 

"I'll think about it," was the best she could give him. He must have matured greatly after being here so long, because he didn't press her. Instead, he smiled and let her move on. 

Beyond him and her parents was a spacious forest, full of other spirits she knew were not the ghosts of humans, except for one. He stood out to her, and she stopped for him, a beautiful white bird that radiated fatherly love. Her true father. Kelsang. 

It hurt so much to see him again, but it was a good pain. He flew to her, changing as he did, and that beloved old face brought tears to her eyes. 

"I'm sorry," they both said at once, yet neither believed there was anything for them to forgive. They embraced fiercely, and a softly spoken "I love you," was their compromise. 

They stood there, together again, for so long that Kyoshi thought Rangi might come crashing impatiently through the forest. It would've been nice, honestly. The thought reminded her of old times. 

"Kuruk is free, too," Kyoshi mumbled into his shoulder, almost as an afterthought. 

"I'll see him soon," Kelsang replied. "For now, you're looking for someone more important. Let me guide you." 

Then, he was the bird again, winging away across a sky far brighter than that of the world from which they'd come. Kyoshi followed him, dazzled by the light in his form. She followed blindly, trusting, and he did not fail her. 

They came to a flowering field beyond a sparkling river, where two bright red felines lay side by side. The creatures were quite literally identical, but Kyoshi could tell them apart easily. One was her mother-in-law, and the other was her very soul. 

They rose together, their bronze eyes wide and waiting. Hei-Ran did not move or change as Kelsang landed beside her, a neighbor checking up on things. 

Rangi was her old self in an instant, sprinting across the field to hurl herself into Kyoshi's waiting arms for the first time in centuries. 

Her glowing girl's weight had been no great burden to her in life, and here they both felt weightless, but Kyoshi collapsed to her knees anyway, holding her beloved wife close with every selfish intention of keeping her there for all of eternity. Rangi didn't seem to mind one bit. 

"How?" she asked through the most beautiful tears Kyoshi had ever seen. "I thought... the Avatars-"

"We're free," Kyoshi replied with a sob. "There's a new cycle and no need for us anymore. I can be with you again." 

Rangi wept freely into Kyoshi's chest. 

"I looked for you," she said. "I looked for you for years, even though every spirit I met told me the Avatars were somewhere else. I never accepted that I couldn't see you again."

"I'm here now." Free of the rules of etiquette, Kyoshi pressed a long overdue kiss to Rangi's scalp. "I'll be here forever."

-----

If you enjoyed, please consider reblogging to share it with others! Reblogs are the best way to make a creator's day!

Additionally, I have a Kofi that basically functions as a tip jar for those interested in supporting the writer through other means.

[havendance]

Help! I was Reborn as Robin's Father!

Chapter 1

ao3

Fandom: Batman

Wordcount: 2400

Summary:

I was just an ordinary university student until I got in a car accident and woke up as Jack Drake! Now I've got to figure out how to be a dad to Robin and also how to survive my inevitable death. I'm sure I'll figure it out. I hope.

Hey, remember that time I mention writing a Jack Drake self-insert isekai fic? Well I wrote the first chapter back in february and then it proceeded to rot in my drafts while I was at school until now. Not sure if I'll continue this, but I do have ideas and this chapter was fun to write. This isn't one of my priorities though.

Excerpt:

It was a Thursday when my life suddenly derailed. Garfield may rail against Mondays, but let me tell you, Thursdays are the really rough ones. On Mondays you can still be optimistic about the week spread out before you. By the time you’ve gotten to Thursday, though, you’re worn out and ready for it to be Friday, only it’s not, so instead you suffer. Also, Thursdays are my long days, so that doesn’t help either.

This particular Thursday was pouring and miserable. I would much rather be curled up in a cozy corner with a warm cup of tea and a good book, but instead I was driving down the freeway before the sun was even up because I had an 8am class I needed to get to. I hated commuting. Sure, it was cheaper than living on campus, but it was an absolute pain, especially in times like this when everyone forgot how to drive. 

I was mentally cursing the US’ lack of public transportation options that meant I had to do my own driving, when suddenly the car in front of me spun out of control. I slammed on my brakes, but with all the rain coming down, I found myself losing control as well. Shit, shit, shit. God, help me—

Suddenly, everything came to an abrupt stop. There was a crash, a flash of pain, and everything went black.

—

My head was fuzzy. There was a… beeping? Some sort of noise in the distance. Was it my alarm? Was I late for school? There was also… a voice? Maybe? I couldn’t make out who was talking or what they were saying.

I was tired. I was really tired. I felt like my body was made of lead. Like I’d used too many blankets and was having one of those dreams where I was trapped and couldn’t move. Opening my eyes sounded like a truly monumental task, and I didn’t want to go to school anyway, so I didn’t and let myself sink back into sleep.

The next time I drifted towards consciousness, it was quieter. There was still that beeping itching away at me, but nothing else. Barely conscious, I felt fuzzy and separate from my body. My hand though—I could feel the barest sensation of another hand in mine. As soon as I had finally put that together, the hand was gone. I wanted it back. Was it my mother’s? I tried to call out to her but I couldn’t speak and soon I fell back asleep.

When I finally managed to wake up, it was bright and I couldn’t see. Eventually though, my eyes adjusted. Mama wasn’t there. I was lying in a hospital bed. I felt tired and weak and could barely move. There was a nurse in the room with me. She brightened when she saw I was awake.

“Mr Drake!” she said. “You’re awake!”

Keep reading on ao3!

[lohotine]

Can you please make one Prune x Reader where the reader arrives to Prune's house with injuries and wet because it was raining and he got into a fight because some other cookies said negative stuff about Prune, and so Prune takes care of him with warmth, bandages, cuddles and kisses?

(by the way I love the way You write ✨^^)

AN: Sorry for taking so long on this one. I wrote a draft earlier and then forgot to save it. Also, thank you! I'm glad you enjoy my works, and I hope you enjoy this one as well!

Prune Juice x Injured! Male! Reader

Oneshot

Warnings: mention of injury

-For You-

A cold rain trickles down your face, and your arms sting from multiple scratches and bruises. Maybe getting into a fight with those students was a bad idea after all....

Though...

They really did have it coming.

You had already warned them beforehand to shut up. You told them what you would do if they continued to spout those lies about your beloved.

But they continued anyway, so it really wasn't your fault.

Ah, but now you were standing outside of Prune Juice's door.

A few days earlier, you agreed to hang out at his place. You weren't going to bail just because of some rain and injuries. Hopefully he won't be too upset with your current predicament.

Reluctantly, you knocked on the door to his house. Knock Knock.

It didn't take long for the door to swing open, and for Prune Juice to look at you with concern.

"I thought you would've cancled today because of the rain-" he said in astonish.

"It's just water," you'd respond.

Prune Juice quickly invited you in, and it was only then that he noticed the multiple wounds on your body.

"Ack- what happened to you-" Prune Juice asked frantically, checking some of your injuries.

"Oh, it's not a big deal. Don't worry about it," you told him.

"Not a big deal? This is a very big deal!" He grabbed your arm and quickly brought you into the bathroom. He started to dig through a few cabinets, collecting some spare medical supplies that he had lying around.

Meanwhile, you just sat in the corner, with your knees tucked into you chest.

"Darling, can I see that one on your arm?" he asked you, to which you immediately complied.

He spent a while carefully disinfecting it, making sure that you wouldn't get too hurt in the process. I guess it would have been expected, but he was very diligent and precise in his work.

"So, care to tell me how these injuries came to be?" he asked you while starting to wrap some bandages around your arm.

"They had it coming. I told then to stop talking about you when they clearly had no idea what they were talking about. I did warn them, but they didn't listen. They were asking for it," you told him.

Prune Juice sighs. "For just a little while... won't you try to stay out of trouble?" He asked you, gazing into your eyes.

"Ill try, for you."

Prune Juice smiles and continues to tend to your wounds.

Both of you fill the silence with some mindless chatter, laughing on occasion until Prune Juice finally finished.

"All right, that should do it!" He returned all of the supplies to their rightful positions before looking back at you.

"And now... why don't we cuddle? I've missed you~" he would say while cupping your face.

You nod your head and he brings you to the couch.

A movie is turned on, and the rest of the day is spent recovering or doing small, easy activities.

And anytime you say that something hurts, Prune Juice offers to kiss you to make it feel better.

《☆》 Fin

[apprenticestanheight]

hi!! i have a request :) would it be okay if you wrote a specs x transmasc reader where the reader gets specs to help him with a testosterone shot?? its totally okay if no tho!! have a good day :)

T - specs x transmasc! reader

hi nonnie!! I'm sorry this took a while--this one has been sitting in my drafts for a good few weeks now and I've had it written for just as long. My object permanence is the absolute fuckin' worst, however, and I, admittedly, forgot to edit this before today because of getting distracted by other projects and also getting so anxious I physically could not will myself to get out of bed multiple days in a row since you sent this one into my inbox.

HOWEVER, I did get my shit together today (started on medication for adhd because I told my dr I thought I had it and we're testing it out to see if it works for me to help with those symptoms + anxiety management wot wot) and so, here this is!! I am, once again, sorry for the delay, and I promise if you send another request in I will do my best to do it that week.

fic type - this is fluffy!!

warnings - there are mentions of needles in this

In the five years since you'd come out and the five and a half since you and Specs had started dating, you'd only asked him to help you with your weekly testosterone shot maybe twice in the three and a half years since you'd finally gotten through all of the necessary hoops and had been able to start taking it.

Normally, you could do it yourself without a hitch, sometimes a little squeamish at the sight of the needle, but that Friday you'd asked him to help because he did it a bit quicker than you did--even if by just a solid second or two--while the two of you were on a time crunch in a rush to meet Elise and Tucker. Also, somewhat, as a way to squeeze a bit more time with him out of your day because you had to work an eight hour shift from 3-11, and when you got home he'd either be reading a comic while half asleep or asleep on your side of the bed in your absence.

He agrees to your ask without questioning it, getting the shot ready while you talk to him about how work has been because you've worked a string of evening shifts for the past three weeks and have been too drained to talk about it the next day. He happily listens, occasionally commenting where it's appropriate to make a remark or agree with an opinion you hold about a coworker, though he also acknowledges that he only has your bias to base an opinion on and not his own.

"Thank you for this, by the way," you murmur as you're standing up to pull your pants down to your thighs. "I know I could've done it myself, but I've missed you a lot lately and wanted to squeeze in an extra few minutes."

That remark brings out a soft smile from Specs, given to you as you're sitting back down. A second later, you can see the debate as to whether or not he wants to give you a forehead kiss occur in his expressions before he pauses, presses a quick but somewhat lingering kiss to your forehead, one of his hands reaching up to cup your cheek.

"I've missed you too, for what it's worth," Specs says. "Elise has kept us busy with her clients and Tucker and I have kept ourselves busy with Spectral Sightings stuff, but we've not seen much of each other lately and it's been hard."

You've missed him so terribly that it hurts, and there have been multiple points in the lulls of your evening shifts wherein you've been tempted to just pick up the phone and call him. You haven't for fear of being judged and seeming co-dependent, but you're at a point where you don't care how co-dependent it makes you seem. You're allowed to miss him when you're working evenings and don't get much of a chance to see him except for in your easier mornings.

You're nodding your agreement with his sentiments as he finishes getting your shot ready. You watch the needle go in, unblinking and relatively unphased, grabbing a "fun" Band-Aid--one shaped like a ghost, one of many from a Band-Aid kit gifted to you by Tucker for your birthday that year--to place over it as the slight pain from the injection settles and the needle is removed.

You pull your pants back up and rake your hands through your hair as Specs discards the needle properly, ever the one to be cautious about how your injection needles are handled, and you're thanking him as you put your testosterone away as it's meant to be stored.

He does a bit of idle cleaning while you finish getting ready, and you wind up stealing one of his button downs to wear over a black shirt. You kiss his cheekbone as he tosses you your keys, and the two of you leave your shared house hand in hand, so full of contentment that you already know how happy you seem is bound to make Tucker fake a gag while he smiles.

[anothersoulless]

Red Windows {Cloud Strife x Reader}

I've been gone for a long while working on like, 10 different drafts on and off while also managing life (it's stressful rn, ngl) but let's get to a different thing I wanted to do (so I have more stuff to work on :3)

Considering Spotify wrapped was released a bit ago, I will work on OneShots based on my wrapped, they're gonna be smaller though, since I'm trying to rekindle my passion for writing. Also, of course, I keep my right to skip any song, the only songs I 100% will do are song in my top 5, also song I already based a OneShot off do not get a second one unless i want to. Anyways, I know I ALREADY wrote something with this song, but I'm gonna be honest... I hate it. So let's change that! (this one is a lot better but I still don't like it, anywho)

First up:

The music in the club was loud, nearly deafening as you sat down near the bar, your drink right in front of you. The main lights were dimmed, wildly coloured spotlights roaming on an automated path through the room, some device near the ceiling creating a colour-changing star pattern on the floor. There was a dance floor at the farthest wall, even though most people just danced wherever they wanted to. The barkeeper was rushing around behind the bar, due to some misfortune, all alone this evening.

Taking another sip of your drink, you watched the crowd. It all seemed to blur together, like it was all distant, until you looked back at your drink, the liquid a light blue hue due to whatever juice the mocktail was mixed with. Some people were obviously singing along with the music, their voice drowned out by the bass running through you body, shaking the floor and glasses. Watching over the crowd, your eye got caught on multiple couples, some just looking great, some dancing in a ridiculous manner, others getting a tad bit too handsy. Adverting your gaze again, you downed your drink, ready to leave. It hadn't even been your idea to come here, and yet he was the one who was late.

You made your way to the barkeeper, sliding the money over you owed them, some additional dollars added, as you left. You bid the guard near the exit goodbye, wishing him a good day and leaving the estate, going up the stairs to ground level. Immediately, there was a big commotion, two people arguing about something. It was definitely the guy who checked everyone and gave them the bracelet, arguing with someone about their ID. You pulled out your phone, while walking up, already pulling up the chat with your date, writing only a meager "I'm leaving, thanks for the heads-up" and sending it. You pocketed your phone and looked towards the commotion, stopping dead in your tracks.

"Please, I swear I'm 18, how else would I have a Tattoo? I really just forgot my ID, doesn't my driver's license prove enough?!" But the Guard was unyielding, despite his logic being flawed, still denying the blonde entry. The blonde with the unique hairstyle and the striking outfit you had been looking out for all night. A blonde with a tattoo on his lower arm. It were too many similarities to be a coincidence, especially after he begged to just talk to his date waiting inside, since his phone died. You went up to him then, tapping him on the shoulder. "Cloud?" The blonde turned around, dressed in a loose, white button-up without a tie, a bit messy on his figure, yet still charming, paired with grey dress pants and black dress shoes.

He was confused, not immediately recognizing you, taking a few seconds to register. "I'm sorry, I swear I would have been here on time, but I was in such a rush I forgot my ID at home and-" you smiled, stopping him with a hand hold up "I heard, it's okay. Let's just do this another day" Cloud seemed a bit defeated, before he perked up. "Wait, uh- I... I know a place we could go, if.. if you still want to?" You blinked a few times, debating. "Sure, are you driving?" He nodded, leading you to his vehicle. You didn't know what you expected, maybe something like a car, definitely not a motorbike, though. With a bit of help from him, you got on, before he gave you a spare helmet and his riding jacket, which you happily accepted. You could tell he was a lot more careful when riding, a lot more tense. Maybe he didn't want to scare you? It was kind of cute really. And your hands felt warm thanks to his body heat, which made you wonder just how warm he was when he wasn't subjected to cold evening air. Shrugging that thought aside was probably a bad idea, considering you could just feel his muscles under the shirt, now the only thing your mind focused on. They weren't rock-hard, still a bit squishy and you hoped to god he hadn't noticed when your fingers dug into his flesh a bit, or, if he noticed, that he thought it was because of the motorcycle.

The Place you two ended up at looked nothing like the club he had chosen originally. It was a bit run down, made of wood and looked a bit messy with the string lights and the huge sign reading Seventh Heaven. Cloud let you get off the bike first, then parked it and turned to you with an apologetic look. "I know it's nothing like we planned and definitely not what you thought, if you want to leave-" you smiled and cut into his words. "It's okay, it doesn't matter where we eat or drink, we wanted to get to know each other, one as long as it's good i don't mind." He smiled. "It's the best, even if it looks a bit sketchy" You gave him back his Jacket and he packed away everything, before offering you his arm. You took his hand and he led the way, up the stairs and through the double doors. There was a woman behind the counter, gorgeous, and she already looked tough from a bit away. She looked up and surprise crossed her face. "Cloud?" She then looked at you, and before she even asked who you were she seemed to already know, instead asking what had happened for you two to end up here instead of the 'fancy' place that was the original plan.

The bar was empty, but it looked clean and lived in, loved even. Cloud didn't hesitate, striding to the counter and sitting down after you. He let you introduce each other, before he explained that she was a childhood friend who had already helped him many times in various situations. She was nice, saying she'd even give you two something to eat, as you and Cloud started your date. "So, childhood friends?" He nodded simply. "Yeah. Tifa and I have been... Through a lot of complicated-" he paused, for a minute. "It's not like we even dated, god no" he blushed at that thought. Embarrassed. "It's just a lot of complicated things we've experienced together." You smiled cheekily, sipping on the drink in front of you, shimmering just as blue as Cloud's eyes and resting you head on you hand, before you teased "So she's no one I should worry about?"

He sputtered, nearly choking on his drink, as he rushed to reassure you, while you simply chuckled. "Don't worry, I know how it is. It's good to have such a close friend, really." Your date smiled then, a small smile but it was there. "Yeah. I don't have many friends, admittedly. You don't really make a lot of friends when you have my last and my job and... Well, I've been alone a lot. Tifa was there when I needed her and I got some real good friends afterwards as well. They're good friends, all of them"

Cloud was always very vague about his job and past, but you didn't mind. It was not your place to pry. Not yet, anyways. Maybe someday... You looked at his glass, the drink a ruby red, so clear and vibrant it nearly looked like it was a crystal itself. "So, I know people always wonder, so, did you already have a girlfriend?" He pondered. "I wouldn't call her that. She was a very close friend but it was never more, even if the lines blurred sometimes." There was another faint blush. God, you just loved the way his cheek turned a light pink. "We're still close friends. You'll probably meet her some day."

You chuckled then, "Some day, huh? Looking to repeat today even before it got really started?" His cheeks turned even brighter, and he stammered a bit, definitely flustered beyond compare now. "It's not- I- I didn't mean that, it just slipped out." You laughed, and patted him on the arm. "Think about what you say better, next time" Next time. Some day. A promise of another meeting. Even if he failed to meet you on time. Even if it wasn't the best date ever or ideal or anything like it, you got to know him well. Probably even better than you would originally have, and there was just something about him. Those really bright blue eyes and the blonde hair and the soft, light paper skin had caught your attention. Paired with his tougher build, you didn't know what to expect, but he was a perfect mix of both.

"I have dated a few before. The best relationship I had was probably with a girl from a different neighbourhood, a poor one. My parents didn't approve, but she was the sweetest girl ever." You explained. "We broke it off because we realised we didn't click like that, and we stayed friends as well." His eyes rested on you, studying you. You looked back at him and smiled sweetly. "You know, every time I look at you, I have one thought in mind: pretty. How can you actually be so beautiful?" He blushed at your words, scrambling for words yet again and looking away. "It's weird how you can't handle compliments. Surely, you must have gotten these a few times, no?" He shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. I just... Never cared about the person saying it." "Awe, so you care about me already? It's our first date, and you're already falling for me."

In a flurry of braveness, he looked you dead in the eyes, "what if I am?" Dear Lord, you nearly felt your soul leave your body, this man had really no idea what he was doing, nearly killing you like that. You stayed silent, air whipped out of your lungs and thoughts racing through your brain, too fast to grasp. And then a whisper: "That wouldn't be a bad thing" Both of you blushed, and the evening went on. A small homely meal later, a few drinks in your system, your arm religiously brushed against his, your shoe bumping against his chair more often than before, sitting closer together now as well. You laughed and you ate and you drank. Then he had to stop, still wanting to be able to drive home. You decided to call it a night, a sense of uncertainty washing over you two.

You didn't want to push it. It had been a really fun night. He fumbled nearly every step along the way, but still managed to make it even better than expected. When you went to the bathroom, you took a pen and a piece of a bill that you left in your pocket and scribbled down your number on it, folding it. Considering he hadn't asked for your number and simply did everything via the app you two met over, you figured maybe this would push him in the right direction without pushing too far.

You returned to the counter, tapping Cloud on the shoulder. "We should probably call it a night. I have to work tomorrow, and you can't drink anymore because you need to drive, so I'd say this is a fairly good place to stop." He looked at you, from his sitting position, for a second, before he stood up. "Yeah, you're probably right. Do you want me to drive you home, or is that too soon?" You shook your head. "A little bit too soon, Cloud." You bid your goodbye to Tifa before returning to Clouds bike. "Don't worry about me getting home. I'll have a friend pick me up in a few minutes. On another note... I really had fun tonight. Somehow, even when it first looked like you had just ditched me, you made it... Probably my best date ever. Thank you for that. You leaned up to kiss him on the cheek, and handed him the paper.

"Call me if you want it throw it away if you don't. I hope I'll see you again?" He smiled again then, leaning down a bit. Your faces were so goddamn close, mouths nearly touching. "You definitely will" and then he kissed your forehead and smiled as he drove off. You look back at the bar. Tifa standing in the double doors and shaking her head, smiling. He still had to work on some of his etiquette, but he was doing really well. And you? You simply smiled, a giddy feeling in your chest, while the corners of your mouth refused to lower even an inch.

[njm63522]

Heya, not sure if you're still writing headcanons but what about Lady nagantXreader where Kaina hinted about the possibility of having kids with the reader and/or Kaina finding out that she's the reader's main fave heroine and she's their sapphic awakening growing up (I'm not sure if you're comfy headcanon-ing an age gap where reader and Kaina are both adults, the reader is in their 20's). You can choose which one you write or both, but please don't feel obligated to do this at all. Thank you for your time!

A/n; YALL IM ALIVE I SWEAR 😭 I've been writing, and I have a pile of unfinished fanfics in my drafts rn because life has been kicking me in the ass. I'm still taking requests right now though‼️

I WILL be writing for both of these because I think these are such cute ideas. (I'm not caught up with mha so this might be ooc)

Kaina tsutsumi/lady nagant x reader

- honestly, I think she'll be so subtle about wanting a kid, you won't even notice at first.

-shell occasionally throw in light hearted comments about what she would do if she had a kid. Or maybestare a little too long at mothers with their kids in the supermarket

-this will progressively get more frequent and she'll start to get EXTEREMELY obvious about it (without directly saying anything)

(Imagine this)

You're in the kitchen of your shared apartment, cooking up some dinner for your lovely wife/girlfriend after a long day.

You're turned away from her, leaning over the stovetop when she suddenly appears behind you.

"I want a baby." She says, completely serious and dead faced.

You laugh at how badly she managed to scare you, until it finally sets in what she said, you gently urge her to repeat incase you misheard her or something (how you could've misheard that? I don't know, don't ask me)

"A baby. I want one." She repeats. Still completely serious.

And scene.

- if you decide to go the IVF, adoption or surrogate route is completely up to you. She's just happy to be there.

-personally, I think this woman would be an AMAZING mother

-If this is pre tartarus, I don't think she'd be around much because of her hero work. But she she's off work, she'll try her best to just give you a break

-post tartarus, she'll obviously be around more. Alway ready to help you and the baby whenever you need (or don't need) it

-except for cooking.

-she can't cook.

-when it comes to quirks, she'll 100% keep your child from the HPSC. Under no circumstances will your child be doing any hero work.

-She's seen too many people get lost to that kind of thing and she just can't have it happen to her own flesh and blood.

-for the second part, i wrote it as if she never ended up going to Tartarus because i lowkey forgot about it.. uhm

-if you're a civilian, you both will probably meet in a situation where she ends up saving you somehow.

-you sheepishly thank her and she ends up asking for your number

-you both keep in contact, eventually growing closer and going on dates.

-despite this, she doesn't talk much about her hero work and you don't really ask

-until, that is, she comes out of your bedroom holding a notebook

-YOUR note book from about 10 years ago

-opened to a page you made with corny sketches and doodles of her.

-you immediately jump at her, trying to grab the sketch but she holds it over your hand with that stupid grin on her face.

-initially, you thought thed be mad about the situation and your childhood crush

-but she honestly just thinks its a silly quirk of yours, and a bit ironic that you guys ended up dating.

(no imagine for this one, sorry i didn't know what to put 😭)

[nerdacious]

So now that the fic has been finished for a bit I have some questions about the making of Partners and Paper Trails. I'm just curious about what it was like to write it (and wondering whether my experiences writing for this fandom are universal). No pressure to answer!

Generally speaking, did you find Harry's chapters or Kim's chapters harder/easier to write?

Which parts of the fic (either POV) were your favorite to write? Alternatively, which parts were unexpectedly frustrating?

From what I understand, you wrote the entire fic ahead of time and then edited it as you went along, but didn't start publishing it until the first draft was entirely finished. Do you have any advice for someone who's attempting to write a long fic following a similar process?

(as a secret fourth question, if there's any hidden lore/details that people didn't seem to pick up on/something else fic related you want to share and haven't had the opportunity to, I'm all ears. love me some secret lore 👀)

Sorry it took me so long to respond, I was working on my response instead of working and then I was like crap, I should probably do work, and then I actually went out and did stuff with people irl for once lol. So now I'm back home and can answer this!

Generally speaking, did you find Harry's chapters or Kim's chapters harder/easier to write?

There were aspects of both that were difficult. I spent a whole other fic in Kim's head so I had more practice with him, but I think Harry ended up being a little easier or at least more fun. I could break up reactions and thoughts into each of his aspects vs the solid paragraphs of Kim's chapters. You also can just do more wacky stuff with Harry and his skills. However, it was hard to remember all of the skills. Like, I did Encyclopedia so dirty. After a point I kind of just forgot about him or didn't feel like thinking up facts for him to chime in about lol

Which parts of the fic (either POV) were your favorite to write? Alternatively, which parts were unexpectedly frustrating?

My favorite thing to write is dialogue, especially when Kim and Harry are really getting into the groove of the case and when they get their little banters going. I also really like competence porn so Harry wasn't nearly as much of a mess as he could be in game. It was a bit of a wish fulfillment fic in that I wanted to see Harry doing better for himself and not just for Kim. I think directly after Martinaise he probably was doing worse than the point he's at in the start of the fic.

The hardest part was writing the case and trying not to make it too obvious (but it definitely was so I had to hope people enjoyed it regardless haha). I'd never done a mystery before so coming up with what happened and how/what they discovered was challenging. So I guess that's not really unexpectedly difficult. Writing the actual porn was unexpectedly frustrating! A majority of what I write is smut so it was like "why is this so difficult???". I had to get that last chapter perfect (I still don't think it is, but what writer ever does) because I dragged it out long enough and I didn't want to let anyone down. It's very different from what I originally had. I also had never written d/s before, thankfully my editor has experience in that realm so he had really good pointers even though it's really light in the fic lol. I still don't know how successful I was with the smut for this one.

From what I understand, you wrote the entire fic ahead of time and then edited it as you went along, but didn't start publishing it until the first draft was entirely finished. Do you have any advice for someone who's attempting to write a long fic following a similar process?

Some people can just write and post as they go, but I have way too much anxiety to start posting something that isn't finished. I also have way too much ADHD to trust that once I started something I actually would finish it. I've also seen too many fics that don't know or don't want to quit so they just keep going past the point where it would have been a good/interesting ending (not really in this fandom, I just mean in general). So, yes, I finished it, had my editor do an initial read, made some general edits based on his feedback, and then he did a more in-depth edit of the first few chapters and then I started posting them. Some chapters I added a lot more to them during this stage and some chapters stayed pretty much the same. There are a few chapters that haven't been edited because he was unexpectedly unavailable for an extended period of time and I didn't want to stop the momentum. I didn't really have a beta reader for this one, but I asked a few people to beta specific chapters. It's not something I typically would want, I'd have preferred to have a beta for all of it, but it is what it is (or was rather). So all of that is to say, you don't have to do it that way lol, but I would at least have an outline and stopping point and stick to it. And if you want a beta reader, find someone who's opinion you trust and who you can trust will be honest with you. Also don't get rid of anything entirely. If you like something, but it doesn't work, cut it and paste it in a separate document because you might find a way to bring it back or parts of it back in other places. Also make copies for version control. Once I finished it, I made a copy so if I changed something too much in the final version but didn't like it, I could either refer back to or restore parts from the original.

As for secret lore/things no one mentioned:

In the first chapter, when Mollins first flips the siren on, Harry has an adverse reaction to the sound because of his encounter with The Pigs. Then there's an Esprit De Corps check about her listening to her police shows. (Hilarious fact: I couldn't remember her real name correctly at first and before I double checked the wiki I thought it was Marine Le Pen loool)

This goes back to the first fic, but Kim bought a book on how to support someone in addiction recovery and the receipt shows he bought it when he first started as a detective with Eyes. If you take the radiation drug in the game, there's mention of Kim possibly having had a partner with addiction. Also based on his many comments on seeing officers in much worse condition and having only one partner, I'm guessing he's talking about Eyes so I went with that. I still have no idea what exactly happened with Eyes in my story, though.

Shivers helps Kim open the door to the Linnea.

The reason Johnny's body was dropped off in the Harbor is because there had been a bank robbery in Jamrock at the time and there were cops everywhere looking for anything suspicious. That's a tidbit that didn't make it into the text.

The people in Harry's Shivers check in the first part of his final POV chapter are the people that would have been targeted next.

Thanks for asking these questions, they were fun to answer!

[voylitscope]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @somanywords and @zenaidamacrouras1 💞 Thank you both for the tag! 💞

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

34.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

438,009

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Primarily MCU (17). I've also got Original Work (12), and there are a few fandoms I wrote one/two fics for.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

All Stucky:

1. There Are Strangers I Have Yet to Become 

2. We Set a Precedent, and Now I’m Living With It

3. I Held You in Gloved Hands (And I’m Not Letting Go)

4. There’s a Light (I Find It at Your Side) 

5. If I Could Stop the Clock With You Tonight  (Technically, this isn't true. There is a fic I wrote in 2015 that is my Fic That Blew Up fic. It is my all-time most kudos'd fic by quite a lot. It's a one-shot I wrote in about four hours. It is in pretty small fandom. This fic is, to do this day, one of the top fics when you sort by kudos both for this ship and in the fandom in general. I still get kudos on this fic all the time. I got 5 overnight last night. So, unless I write something else that completely blows up, nothing will ever catch this fic. There's no chance. It will always actually be my number one most kudos'd.

There are two other older fics of mine that would slot into my top five by kudos -- one would actually be two all-time currently. But in the case of those two, that's largely because they've got time on their side.)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Always! Sometimes it takes me a little while, but I always do. I love comments.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I was going to say I didn't really have fics with angsty endings, but that's a lie. I forgot about these two pre-war, unreliable-narrator-Bucky one-shots: But You Can Hold Me (Only 'Cause It's a Cold Night in Brooklyn)  You're a Gem but Not a Saint

And thinking about it, I guess Darling, Let's Take Our Time (While It's Still Ours To Take) is probably also pretty angsty, just because of the circumstances.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I think some of my fics are just really happy overall, tone-wise, so the ending hits happy, too. Most of all We Set a Precedent, and Now I’m Living With It, I think? And i feel like the ending of I Held You in Gloved Hands (And I’m Not Letting Go) really cements the rom-com vibes there. Also, in my original stuff, people seem to really like the ending of Secretly, I’m Hoping for the Dare Again, and I completely get that. It's a very happily-ever-after sort of ending. So, I'd say those three.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I don't. I occasionally get comments that make me uncomfortable, but nothing I'd call hate at all.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I very much do. As for kind, I use the porn with feelings tag a lot, if that counts as a kind, ha. I think. I do get a lot of comments about my smut being sweet, or romantic, or sometimes even oddly wholesome, ha. I mean, like I said, Secretly, I’m Hoping for the Dare Again, has one of my very happiest endings, and I wrote that as a gift fic for the 2022 BDSM exchange. So, that probably says something about my smut style? I think?

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I haven't. Unless you count putting characters into other universes as a crossover, even if they don't interact with that universe's characters? But I feel like that's more just an AU than a crossover.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not one that's on my currently being-used AO3, but yes.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, a few times, but not in years.

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Honestly, it's Stucky.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I hate to say never on anything, but there are several things sitting in my drafts that I haven't touched in so long. It's probably equally unlikely I'll ever finish any of them.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Tone/mood-setting and character voice, probably?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I find describing some actions so difficult, especially when specific things need to happen for plot purposes. Like, any sort of action sequence/confrontation/athletic event/etc sequence is a struggle. It's harder when there are more people involved. Transitioning in and out of scenes is also Not My Favorite.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've done it, most heavily in Will You Keep a Candle Burning? (Will You Let Me Come and Stay?)  and its prequel one-shot. Although, there were also several more Wanda lines in my earliest draft of I Held You in Gloved Hands (And I’m Not Letting Go) but I think only... one? two? of those ended up in the final version. I enjoy including it, and I think it can really add a lot for characters/characterization.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

This was a question on a similar meme months ago, and I honestly didn't remember. I've Wayback Machined myself since then, and my very first fic ever up on fanfiction.net (in November of 2006, apparently) was a Harry Potter fic. I'm not positive it's the first thing I ever wrote, but it is the first fic I ever put up online, so.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

This is so difficult! I am always tempted to just say that Will You Keep a Candle Burning? (Will You Let Me Come and Stay?)  is my favorite/the best thing that I've written. It's 116k! There is a lot of plot! There is so much character development! It's also the story I wrote and liked so much that it pushed me to get back on AO3/sharing my writing on line. Because I just wanted someone else to read it. So it's hard to separate it from the way writing it has impacted my life over the past couple of years.

But there are a few others I do like. For two that aren't in my top five by kudos or mentioned anywhere else in this post so far -- I'm so fond of the Steve and Bucky in We Were Strangers for Far Too Long, and I loved writing this one. I also really like this The Secret Garden fic I wrote for an exchange: So I Could Blend in With the Sky.

No pressure tags for @dharmasharks @sparkagrace @dontcallmebree @musette22 and @thisonesatellite