#i've got some room for improvement lol
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oooh you know what i need is someone to make me a french-language mix cd (or whatever today's equivalent is...a spotify playlist i guess). one semester in college we had this hip young teacher on exchange from france and she made us all mixes with then-popular french music and had us listen to it in class and try to write down the lyrics. there were only like 18 songs but i've been dining out on those for years. probably time for some new blood.
#last weekend i was like let's put on some french music. what should i listen to? how about...an mc solaar album from 2003 <3#which was great but maybe i should try to update my library a little lol#french#music#my posts#it was a good exercise but i was so bad at it. she played repenti by renan luce for us and then asked us what it was about#and my buddy was immediately like 'the mafia' and i was like WHAT????#lo and behold. it is very much obviously about the mafia.#i've got some room for improvement lol
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just wanna say that your art has improved so much over the past year it is actually! amazing!
hey thank you!!! I've been forcing myself to slow down and pay attention to what I'm doing, and I'm glad it's noticeable!! super sweet of you to drop by and say that <33
#MOM LOOK I GOT NICE ANON MAIL!!!#ive been making a lot of art this past year that i havent posted#a lot of which has been ugly lol#i've also finally sort of gotten the hang of paint tool sai (which i only started using this year)#and i still have a lot of room to grow (i wanna get weirder!!)#but yes ive been really trying to focus & improve and anyway anon come here i'll make u some soup <3
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TOWARDS THE LIGHT
My works are 14+ ONLY. If you’re under 14 DO NOT interact with me or any of my works. NO SPAM-LIKING PLEASE
Pairing: Sith!Seonghwa x Jedi!fem reader
Word count: 16,450
Note: So I didn’t think I’d ever write anything longer than Hongjoong’s D&D AU “A Quest For Love” but here we are lol so strap in because this is a big one
The sizzling sound of clashing lightsabers filled the air in the training room, blue and green beams of light swinging around and colliding with one another with a resounding spark.
Seonghwa's saber was swung towards you, which you blocked, pushing back with your own weapon and successfully deflecting his attack. He let out a huff, a small smirk playing at the corner of his mouth at the challenge. He always liked battling with you, though you bested him most of the time, he took it as a chance to improve.
The blue beam of light Seonghwa wielded was spun around in a showy manner as he lunged forward, raising the saber. Your eyes stayed trained on him as he approached with an aggressive attack, holding out your green lightsaber in preparation before swinging it at his and successfully knocking it from his hand.
Seonghwa grunted in mild agitation as he landed on the ground, having lost his footing when he landed. His arm shot out and brought the weapon back to his hand by using the Force. He was always good at that.
Getting to his feet, he wasted no time coming at you again, this time with a determined gleam in his eye. His burst of energy took you by surprise and you found yourself scrambling to do something before his blazing beam of light came swinging at you. With only a few seconds to react, your lightsaber came up to halt his attack, the beams making a sizzling sound when touching.
The weapons were pulled away from one another before clashing once more, and again, and again. Each time, neither of you were able to strike the other.
This was a familiar scene. Being in this gray training room with walls made of metal. You and Seonghwa had spent almost your whole lives training to be Jedi. You were Luke's only apprentices. You were the best of friends—inseparable some might say.
After continuing to block attacks, you saw a moment of opportunity and leapt into the air, attempting to use the Force to assist you in going high enough to jump right over Seonghwa. You just barely missed his head as you moved through the air, landing on the ground with a soft huff. Now standing just behind Seonghwa, you held the tip of your lightsaber to the back of his head, making him freeze.
"I win."
"Not bad." He commented with a chuckle, raising his hands in surrender before turning to face you. "That Force jump was a little rusty though."
"I thought I'd try something new." You shrugged, deactivating your weapon.
"You could still use some practice." He remarked, doing the same with his saber.
"I'm impressed." A voice full of wisdom spoke from one end of the training room.
You and Seonghwa turned your heads towards the utterance, finding Luke standing in the doorway with a fond expression on his face. He had been watching.
"Y/n, that's the first time I've seen you successfully execute a Force jump. You need a little more practice, but I think you'll have it down in no time."
"Thank you, Master Luke." You bowed at his praises, always honored to receive them from such a well-known Jedi.
"Seonghwa, you have this fire in your eyes when engaged in a fight. You've got determination, but your attacks were a little aggressive. When in battle it's good to be strong and vigorous, but you also need to be fluid and focused. Sometimes hostility isn't the best course of action."
Seonghwa nodded, taking in the information he was being given. He wanted to be a good Jedi, as good as Master Luke, and he would do anything to work towards that goal.
"I'll try and tone it down." He nodded, showing that he understood the critiques he was given.
"Good." Luke smoothed out his gray robes, giving the both of you a once over before speaking again. "You two had better go eat. I'm sure you're exhausted from training. You kids have been in here for hours."
With that, he exited the training room.
Glancing over at your battle partner, you could see his round coffee-colored eyes shine with interest at the mention of food—Seonghwa was always a big eater.
"Let's go." You linked arms with him, tugging him out of the room and into the corridor of the ship you often trained in.
Hurrying down the loading ramp of the spacecraft that was parked amongst the lush greenery, you and Seonghwa hastened across the base past other Resistance members, heading directly for the canteen which was really just a large tent set up for people to eat in.
Seonghwa pushed past the beige canvas flaps and entered the area where a handful of people were eating. His eyes locked on the bar situated at the back of the tent where a droid was busying itself by stacking clean bowls. Plopping down on two of the six vacant barstools, you and Seonghwa rested your elbows on the countertop, the droid rolling over to take your orders. A wooden board with a small selection of dishes carved into it hung from a structural beam above the bar. Seonghwa's index finger hovered in the air as he read over the items as if he hadn't done so the last thousand times you two had been in there. While he decided what he wanted, you waved the droid over and ordered a vitajuice and a warm stew, hoping for something filling after a strenuous practice battle.
"Me too." Seonghwa piped up before the droid rolled away, settling on getting the same as you.
"Copycat."
He snorted-slash-scoffed in response to your playful name-calling. "It sounded good when you ordered it. Also, a vitajuice is what I need right now after all that practice." As if to emphasize his words, he stretched out his back and jerked his head a bit, cracking his neck in the process.
"Sure." You responded with an eye roll.
The low murmur of patrons in the mess tent and the distant sound of clanking dishes in the back floated through the air, filling the comfortable silence between you and Seonghwa as you waited for your meals.
The bar droid rolled out from the kitchen area with two glasses clutched in each of its pincers, placing them in front of you and Seonghwa. After thanking the droid, it got back to work behind the counter stacking dishes, picking up right where it left off.
Taking the straw between your index finger and thumb, you took a sip of the refreshing juice, sighing in satisfaction as the cool liquid coated your mouth.
"Ahh. That hits the spot." You hummed.
"Sure does." Seonghwa agreed, sipping so hard on the straw that his cheeks sucked in.
You cackled in response to the ridiculous sight next to you.
"Easy there, bud. It's not going anywhere." You managed to speak through laughter, giving him a reassuring pat on the shoulder.
He pulled away with a drawn-out exhale, the drink having obviously refreshed him.
"I could've chugged the whole thing if I really wanted to."
"I don't doubt it."
Seonghwa's large eyes grew in size when a droid from the kitchen rounded the corner with two bowls of piping hot stew a few minutes later, his hungry gaze following the dishes until they were set down before you. Spoons were given to each of you and you wasted no time getting a sizable spoonful of the stew, Seonghwa following suit. Hums made in unison reverberated in both your throats when you took your first bites, the meal warming you from the inside.
"Is it just me or does food taste better after you've been practicing?" You asked.
"It definitely tastes better." Seonghwa nodded in agreement.
After a filling and satisfactory meal, you took a stroll around camp while your food settled. People bustled about, carrying equipment and crates across the way, some taking them into a nearby cave which doubled as a makeshift hangar for one of the many spaceships.
There was a nice breeze jostling the baby hairs that framed your face and fluttering the leaves of nearby trees. The gray fabric of your pants brushed against the tall grass that covered every inch of the area and beyond. Ajan Kloss, the jungle moon where the Resistance base resided, was where you and Seonghwa had been living your whole lives. You were both moved here as kids, probably no older than ten, by your resistance member parents and when your shared force-sensitivity was discovered by Luke, he started training you. It's all either of you had ever known. There were only fleeting glimpses of your old home planet.
A year later, you found yourself sitting on the Millennium Falcon with Seonghwa, seated on the curved bench of the holographic game table in the lounge area watching him play a round of dejarik with Chewbacca. The ship, piloted by Luke and his closest companion, Han Solo, was headed straight to the planet of Ilum to find kyber crystals for yours and Seonghwa's very own lightsabers. It was tradition for younglings to build their lightsaber before moving up to padawan status, but Luke was different. He had his own ways of training that contrasted from how it used to be before the Great Jedi Purge took place and wiped out almost all the Jedi. Thus why you and Seonghwa were just now getting lightsabers. To say you were excited was an understatement.
Chewbacca raised his furry arms up in victory, having beat Seonghwa in yet another round of dejarik.
"Man." Sighed your friend as he leaned back against the bench with a small smirk tugging up at the corner of his mouth.
"Don't feel bad." You gave him a supportive pat on the shoulder. "Chewie has been playing this game for years. He's a dejarik pro. It's nearly impossible to beat him."
"One day." Seonghwa pointed at the undefeated Wookie who waved off his promise dismissively.
"Hey, kids." Han's approaching voice, followed by the man himself, grabbed your attention. "We're on autopilot right now, but we should be to Ilum soon." He then turned to Chewie. "I hope you're going easy on him." He nodded towards Seonghwa.
The Wookie shook his head before throwing his head back to laugh heartily. Han gave a small chuckle and a head shake of his own before leaning to rest against the nearest wall.
"So, lightsabers." He began.
"Yeah." You nodded with a grin. "I'm really excited. This is a special day."
"Very special." Seonghwa agreed. "It's the most significant day for us as padawans."
"Oh, yes." Han nodded. "I know all about it." He paused to look at the both of you. "Y'know, Luke is really proud of you both. I'm sure he's told you that in some way or another, but I figured I'd say something anyway."
You and Seonghwa shared a gentle look with one another, touched by Han's words.
"Alright, well," He cleared his throat and pushed off the wall he was leaned against, heading out of the room. "gotta get back to the cockpit. Chewie, try to let Seonghwa win a round, will ya?"
A year after you and Seonghwa crafted your lightsabers, Master Luke passed away. It was sudden and almost decisive, like Luke knew it was his time to go and so he went to be one with the Force. Things changed after that.
Your training came to a temporary halt and you were left without a Jedi Master. For a week you didn't leave your sleeping quarters. Meals were brought to you via Leia. Chewie even stopped by once. He was good company and his hugs were always healing in a way. You heard Seonghwa was about the same, staying cooped up in his room just like you.
After that first week, you tried to return to normal and Seonghwa started spending time in the training room swinging his lightsaber and screaming until his lungs burned. You only knew that because you saw him once when passing by. That was the only time you saw him, as he stayed locked in his room majority of the time, isolating himself.
A week and four days after Luke's passing, Seonghwa disappeared. You two were both so wrapped up in mourning that you kept to yourselves. Once your mind had cleared enough, you wanted to check on your friend and see how he was holding up. When the door to his sleeping quarters slid open, you were alarmed to find it completely bare. His bed was made and every piece of furniture was cleared off.
The color drained from your face and every part of your body went cold, your heart plummeting to your feet.
"No." You murmured, spinning around and rushing down the corridors of the ship, stopping at the training room only to find it empty.
Stumbling through the halls, you called out Seonghwa's name, the desperation and panic becoming more apparent in your tone.
"Y/n. What's wrong?"
Whirling around on your heel, you spotted Leia standing at the entrance hall of the spaceship.
"Seonghwa's gone." The words left your lips shakily, fading out weakly at the end. "His room is bare. Cleaned out."
Leia hurried over to take you in her arms just as your knees buckled. With Luke's passing still fresh, Seonghwa disappearing suddenly was like rubbing salt in a wound that hadn't even begun to heal.
"It's alright." Leia cooed, placing a gentle hand on the back of your head. "He could've needed some time alone... away from here."
"Why would he just leave without saying anything?"
"It's possible he's dealing with lots of emotions right now. Maybe he was overwhelmed."
The next words you uttered were muffled due to your face being buried in Leia's shoulder. "Do you think he'll come back?"
"He will. Just give him time."
You sat inside your sleeping quarters of a ship parked at the Resistance base, staring fondly at the lightsaber in your hands. Your fingertips glided reverently over the silvery metal of the hilt, admiring the intricate designs that were etched into them—a personal touch. Though you'd possessed the saber for three years, you still admired it.
"Y/n?"
At the sound of your name being called, you lifted your gaze to find General Leia standing in the doorway of your room.
"Come in."
She entered, a solemn expression etched on her aged yet elegant face as she moved to take a seat beside you on the bed.
"You look concerned." Shifting to face Leia, your brows pulled together. "What's wrong?"
"They're after us again."
"They? The First Order?"
She nodded. "They already destroyed our last base and now they're trying to find this one."
"What do we do? Do we move?"
Leia shook her head. "No. We're not giving up. Besides, they haven't found us yet."
"Then, why'd you come to me?"
She pressed her lips together and stood up, smoothing out her attire. "Let's walk."
You stood up immediately and followed her down the corridor of the ship and off the loading ramp.
Although you tried to be patient, you were itching to know why Leia had come to you with this urgent information. However, instead of forcing her to speak, you waited for her to do it on her own accord.
Your gaze moved to the ships parked about the area as you approached, your fingers fiddling anxiously with the hem of your gray tunic. Whatever it was she needed to say, it wasn't good.
"We need you, Y/n." She finally spoke. "You were trained by my brother and then by me for the last three years."
You blinked incredulously, wondering where she was going with this.
"We don't know what the First Order knows about our location or if they even know it at all. So I need you to sneak onto their ship and plant a listening device."
"You need me to do... what?"
"If we could listen in on what they're talking about, we could collect intel, find out what they know, and use it to our advantage."
"Leia I..." You trailed off, reeling from this being dropped on you so suddenly. "I'm sorry. I have to decline. I-I'm not ready."
"You are. You've been ready."
"There has to be someone else."
She came to a stop, turning to face you fully, her expression serious. "There isn't. You're our only hope."
You shook your head. "What if—"
"No." She stopped you. "No what if's. Y/n, if I didn't think you were capable, I wouldn't be sending you on this mission."
You hardly even ventured off Ajan Kloss. How were you expected to carry out this mission?
"I just..." Your mind was a swirling supercell storm of emotions.
There were so many things to consider, like your lack of expertise in other areas besides battle and having no experience in real missions.
"I can't fly a spaceship, let alone sneak into enemy territory with one. How would I even manage to get by their sensors? They'd pick me up in their airspace right away."
"I can do it." Poe piped up as he happened to be passing by. "I've got a First Order ship in the cave over there." He jerked a thumb somewhere behind him towards a cluster of rocks.
"How did you even get one of those?"
He shrugged in response. "Connections."
Just then, Finn passed by, giving you both a friendly smile and a small wave, oblivious to your conversation. You nodded knowingly in immediate understanding.
"Ah. I see."
"So, will you do it?" Leia asked you, bringing the focus back to the issue at hand.
Taking in a deep breath, you let the possible outcomes flicker in your mind like a slideshow. This could all go terribly wrong—or perhaps it could go incredibly well. Leia believed in you and being the only Jedi on the base, you felt obligated to help, not that you could ever say no anyway.
"Yes."
Walking down the familiar corridors of the ship you called home, you tried to process the fact that you'd be going on your first mission very soon. It was a heavy weight to bear and an even bigger responsibility. Lost in thought, you passed by a room that carried bitter emotions, your footsteps coming to a stop beside it without really thinking. Pressing a button, the door slid open and your eyes landed on the space that was untouched for three years.
Seonghwa's room.
Passing the threshold, you stepped inside and glanced around, your fingers caressing the comforter.
"I sure wish you were here right now." You sighed, speaking aloud to the memories of Seonghwa that remained stagnant in the space. "Could really use your help on this one."
A lump formed in your throat and you swallowed it down, blinking back tears that started to prick your eyes. At first you were sad and confused about Seonghwa leaving all of a sudden—you still were. Then you got angry, feeling like he walked out on you. Now you were just numb.
"This should've been our mission, not mine."
Dropping down to sit on the edge of his bed, you let out another heavy sigh. Your fingers traced absentmindedly over the sleek nightstand, trailing across the handle of a drawer. Without thinking, you tugged on it, something jostling inside as you did so.
With furrowed brows, you peered into the drawer, your eyes slowly widening when you spotted Seonghwa's lightsaber lying inside. With a shaky hand, you reached in and took hold of the hilt, retrieving it from where it sat for three long years.
He left his lightsaber.
This only raised more questions. Did he just give up? Decide he didn't want to be a Jedi anymore since Luke passed?
An image of Seonghwa living on some run-down planet, isolated and alone, flashed in your mind and you hated it.
Shaking away those thoughts, you stood up, your friend's lightsaber in hand, and left. Seonghwa's abandoned weapon was placed on a shelf in your room for safe keeping in case he returned one day.
The following evening, you gathered in the meeting hall with other Resistance members where a plan was made for how you'd infiltrate the First Order's ship and where to plant listening devices. A layout of the enemy ship was projected into the air showing all the different areas.
"A meeting room would be ideal. As would the main control room of the ship. That is where talks between the generals and captains take place." C-3PO spoke in his posh robotic voice while R2-D2 beeped in response. "You could collect lots of intel there."
You nodded, taking it all in, determined to do your absolute best on this mission.
Staring down the entry point on the First Order ship, you clenched your hands at your sides, anxiety plaguing every inch of your body.
"You got this." Poe's voice came from the cockpit of the ship. "I'll be waiting here for you when you're done. You can communicate through your earpiece and I'll be keeping an eye on you through the tracking device inside of it."
"What if I mess up?"
"You won't. I'll tell you where to go."
"What if I get captured?"
"Then we're coming for you."
With that reassurance, you gave a nod and hopped off the spacecraft and into the hangar, sticking close to the wall. You came equipped with three listening devices to plant and your lightsaber which was strapped to your waist in its holster. Your vigilant eyes stayed trained on the stormtroopers marching about the hangar as you slinked along, sneaking behind large First Order spacecrafts parked about the area and using them for coverage until you got to the doors that led to the inside of the ship.
Letting out a shaky exhale, you waited for an opportunity to slip inside when no one was looking. Your hands trembled as you felt the slightest bit of relief that one hurdle had been conquered. Now it was time for the real mission—planting listening devices and not getting caught.
"Poe? I'm in." You whispered.
"Good. You're doing well." He responded through your earpiece. "Go straight and then take a left."
Taking in a deep breath, you proceeded down the empty and darkened corridor of the ship, peering around the corner before taking a turn. There was no time to waste, so you kept moving while waiting for more instructions.
"There you go. Keep going. The meeting room is on your right. Put a listening device under the table in there if the coast is clear."
"Is this it?" You asked once you arrived at a large set of dark gray doors.
"Yes."
Pressing your ear against the cool metal, you listened for voices on the other side, receiving silence in response. Your trembling finger pressed the button to open the doors, a breath of relief leaving your dry lips when you were greeted with the sight of an empty room. Digging out a listening device, you stuck it under the edge of the table, poking your head out to check the halls before swiftly moving out.
"I got it."
"Alright. Proceed down the hall."
Your feet moved quickly, your boots making little noise in the process.
With Poe's direction, you were able to successfully place the second device without issue.
As you fled the area, the sound of stormtroopers talking made you freeze up. Being on a First Order ship, the structure of it was unique with protruding pillars that made for the perfect hiding spot. That, paired with the dim lighting was ideal for your situation, making it easy for you to slip through the shadowy areas. As the voices got closer, you darted to hide yourself behind one of the blocky pillars that jutted out from the wall, pressing yourself against the chilly metal and hoping you wouldn't get caught. The beating of your racing heart thudding in your ears almost completely masked the footfalls of the stormtroopers, your hand hovering over your lightsaber as you watched the two pass by. Your eyes stayed locked on them, following the white-armored figures who didn't notice your presence.
The hand that lingered over your weapon dropped back to your side once the threat was gone and you were on your way.
One more listening device to place.
The intense anxiety you felt before the mission began was not nearly as bad as it was. Having been roaming the corridors of the spaceship for the last ten minutes or so, you managed to get used to the task you were carrying out. That being said, there was still the anxiety of everything going wrong, however, you tried to keep your hopes up.
"Y/n? You still there?"
"Yeah." You let out an exhale. "Stormtroopers passed by. I was hiding."
"Good call. Your last destination is the control room. That'll be difficult because it'll be full of ship staff I'm sure."
Poe could hear your sigh through the earpiece.
"Hey, you got this." He encouraged.
"I know."
"You don't sound very confident."
"I'm not." You murmured, peering around a corner before rounding it. "But I'm gonna pretend to be."
"There you go. Fake it 'til you make it."
A mix between a scoff and a chuckle left you.
"Control room is up the way. Keep an eye out though, there might be some unsavory individuals in there."
That made your heart jump with dread. Unsavory individuals?
"Like who?"
"Ones in higher ranks, like generals."
"I see."
You proceeded down the corridor, pressing yourself behind another metal pillar to hide from more approaching stormtroopers. As soon as they passed, you got back to the mission.
"The doorway should be directly ahead of you." Poe informed.
"I see it."
A few feet in front of you was an open doorway, multiple uniformed people sitting in front of large control panels. Holding your breath, you drew closer to the doorway, daring to peer inside. Standing at the forefront of the room in front of a massive window and more controls was a man in a black uniform, probably a general, discussing something with another crew member.
"Just stick the tracker in a corner or something. Don't stay too long." Poe's voice spoke into your ear.
With the last listening device in hand, you scanned your surroundings and took a step into the control room, spotting one of those structural pillars. The little device was placed into the junction between the wall and the column, unable to be spotted unless someone was really looking for it.
Back on the ship, Poe watched the red dot on his little handheld tracker screen as it moved along the halls of the First Order ship.
"You got it?" He asked.
"Yeah."
"Nice work." He grinned. "I knew you could do it. Now get back here and let's split."
"Copy that."
His eyes stayed locked on the red dot traversing the map as he gave you directions. Every few feet, you'd stop, assumably to hide from passerby in the ship, before resuming.
"Almost there." He said.
You were approaching the hangar, only one turn down the hall and you'd be home free.
The dot stopped moving.
A gasp sounded from your end and Poe's heart sank.
"Y/n?"
"Well, well, well. What's this?" A male voice spoke, sounding close to you.
More panicked noises came through, getting quieter before Poe heard a distant "No!" from you before the feed got staticky, a crunch, and then silence.
"Y/n?" The panic in the pilot's voice rose. "Are you there? Do you copy?"
Nothing.
Poe looked out the windshield of the First Order ship he used to sneak in, peering down at the stormtroopers lingering about. Some of them had their hands held to the side of their helmets before turning to look directly at the spacecraft Poe was occupying.
"Blast!" He hissed through his teeth.
Not only had he lost contact with you, but it seems whoever caught you had notified everyone on board. He had no choice but to hightail it out of there, lest he get captured as well.
"Sorry, Y/n." He murmured, sitting upright in his seat and starting up the ship. "New plan."
The stormtroopers below started shooting at the spacecraft as it lifted off the floor, the hangar door beginning to close. Poe pushed the handles on the control panel forward and the ship plowed down the troopers close by.
"C'mon. C'mon." He spoke through clenched teeth, directing the spacecraft towards the exit, picking up speed.
The gap was slowly closing and it seemed Poe wasn't gonna make it. He winced as the top of the ship scraped against the closing hangar door, not doubt denting and scratching the exterior, as it slipped out into the open space.
A sigh of relief left the pilot as he made his escape, silently vowing to come back with a whole team of Resistance fighters to bring you home just as he promised.
You'd been listening to instructions from Poe, coming to a stop to peer around the corner when he told you to take a turn. That's when someone grabbed you from behind, making you gasp. You couldn't see who it was as you struggled in their grip.
"Y/n?" Poe asked.
"Well, well, well. What's this?" A male voice spoke, a gloved hand moving into your peripherals as your earpiece was pulled out and dropped to the floor.
"No!" You exclaimed.
You could barely hear Poe's panicked voice from the device as it fell, clattering to the metal flooring, your captor swiftly crushing it under his chunky black boot.
You writhed in his hold, somehow managing to slip out, stumbling forward and reaching for your lightsaber which you withdrew from its holster and activated it, the green beam humming as it extended from the hilt.
Your enemy, who donned an all-black outfit and a hood that concealed his face, activated his own saber, a blazing red beam lengthening at his side.
With hardly any time to react, you held your lightsaber up, blocking an aggressive attack from the Sith in front of you. Any anxiety you felt was numbed by your survival instincts and the desire to make it back home—if that was even an option anymore. For all you knew, Poe could've abandoned the mission for the sake of safety.
Clenching your teeth, you pushed back against the red beam with all the power you could muster, getting the Sith away just long enough to scramble backwards down the corridor. It didn't take long before he was back on you again, swinging left and right while you blocked and dodged his attempted attacks. Your back hit a door and your free hand felt for a button, pressing it. A hissing sound came from the hatch as the doors slid open and you staggered backwards inside. The area had electrical panels on the wall and was more spacious than the ship's corridor, giving you more room to fight and move around.
The Sith strode into the room with you and swiped at your side, which you barely evaded. In turn, you let out a grunt and swung your weapon at his chest, which he leaned back and avoided with ease.
Straightening his posture, he brandished his lightsaber in preparation, his boots thumping heavily against the floors as he approached. A shout left the hooded man as he swung at you, the saber making a resounding voosh as the blade was forced through the air.
Your eyes widened as his saber collided with yours harshly, the force behind the action making you stumble back slightly, your arms trembling as you tried to push back against it.
You weren't prepared for this.
All that training and you weren't prepared.
With a jerk of his lightsaber, The Sith knocked your weapon right out of your hand, causing it to deactivate and skid across the room.
The cloaked figure held his weapon above his head, spinning while thrusting the blade in your direction, the force of the showy action causing his hood to fly off just as you fell to the ground trying to back away.
"Ugh!" A grunt was forced out of your body as you collided with the floor, your eyes staring down the humming red beam pointed directly at your throat.
Your chest moved up and down rapidly with each shallow breath, looking up at your attacker with wide, horrified eyes as you realized his hood had flown off. Every limb in your body went cold, the blood draining from your face in an instant.
"Seonghwa?"
His hair was longer, reaching just above his shoulders, some of the long strands stuck to his forehead from the intense fight. His eyes, which you remembered being round and full of warmth, were now sharp and cold as ice. Your best friend had fallen victim to the Dark Side.
His eyes widened for just a millisecond at the sound of his name before narrowing, his gaze hardened and full of contempt as if just seeing you brought back unwanted memories.
"What did they do to you?" Your voice came out in a faint whisper of shock and horror.
"They didn't do anything to me."
His tone was harsh and calloused, no sign of the once upbeat and soft-spoken Seonghwa you knew three years ago.
The severity of the situation hit you and you began scrambling back away from the deadly red beam of light in your face, your arm reaching out to bring your own saber back to you. It slowly started rolling towards you only for Seonghwa to stretch an open hand out towards it, intercepting it and throwing the weapon across the room by an invisible force.
"You may have been a better fighter, but you always were a horrible user of the Force." He spat.
The doors to the room hissed and two stormtroopers walked in.
"Take her away." Seonghwa ordered sternly watching you with an unchanging and stoic expression as you were roughly tugged to your feet and dragged out of the room. "Detention cell 1117." He specified.
There were so many things you wanted to say, yet nothing came from your lips. All you could do was stare at Seonghwa with an expression full of confusion and hurt as you were hauled out of the room.
The cell you were placed in was nothing like you expected; it was clean and equipped with a small, but cushioned cot. The stormtroopers shoved you into the room, slamming the door shut, giving you one glance through the gated window before marching away.
You dropped down onto the cot, your trembling knees no longer able to support you, letting you collapse.
Seonghwa.
He didn't run away, he became a Sith. All these years worrying and wondering where he was, if he was okay, asking yourself why he left... and he was here.
How did this happen?
It was the question that kept spinning in your mind, echoing repeatedly.
How did this happen?
There was no way Seonghwa, your best friend, the man you secretly liked, had turned to the Dark Side. It didn't make sense. He never showed any desire to cross over, not that you could recall, anyway.
The dull ache in your heart grew in intensity the longer you thought about what your best friend had turned into.
The heavy thump of approaching footsteps made you lift your head, your eyes locking with those of the man you once knew. The door to your cell swung open and he stepped inside, his presence alone shifting the air in the room.
No words were exchanged at first. All you could do was stare at him, taking in the angry lines etched on his otherwise flawless face. His intense eyes stared you down, the scowl on his face not budging. This new version of Seonghwa was jarring to say the least, but he was still someone you used to know.
"So this is where you ran off to." You murmured.
He didn't speak, staring you down in silence. His lack of response was both perplexing and agitating. Did he have nothing to say?
You scoffed, shaking your head as a spark of anger ignited. "I can't believe you." Your expression was full of emotion, rage fueled by sadness and betrayal. It felt like you'd been punched directly in the heart.
Seeing Seonghwa again wasn't the joyous reunion you imagined it would be—it was much worse. Instead of embracing him in a tearful hug, you had been blocking his aggressive attacks and trying to make it out of the battle unscathed.
As Seonghwa stood just inside the cell, the emotions you felt rapidly turned into fiery anger that unfortunately reared it's ugly head.
"You got weak." You spoke through gritted teeth, your fists clenching.
In a fit of sudden rage, you stood up from the cot and charged at Seonghwa with a shout.
Your breath hitched when you felt a pressure around your throat, your wide eyes staring at the man you called your best friend with a gloved hand outstretched and fingers partially curled. A strained noise left your dry mouth as you clawed at your throat futilely, desperate to get rid of the invisible force that constricted your windpipe.
"You're the weak one." Seonghwa spoke, his voice low and threatening as his extended arm lifted higher, his gaze boring holes into you.
"Pl-please." You choked out, your legs kicking as your feet left the floor, black spots dotting your vision.
His hand squeezed more, curling in just another inch or so and applying more crushing pressure to your windpipe.
"Hwa." You whimpered, your voice nothing but a hoarse and whispered plea.
"Don't call me that." He hissed through clenched teeth. "That name died when Luke did. It's Mars now."
That's the last thing you heard before the black creeping in your peripherals took over.
"Do you ever feel like you have a weight to carry?" You asked Seonghwa, gazing up at the star-dotted galaxy above, seated in a cross-legged position on top of the Millennium Falcon. "Like a burden?"
"A burden?" Seonghwa echoed. "You mean like with glorious purpose?"
You sat there for a moment before shaking your head. "No. That's not it. That's someone else." You paused, reconsidering. "Though maybe it is glorious purpose in a way." You murmured mostly to yourself. "Being Luke's only two apprentices is a huge honor, especially since there aren't many Jedi being trained anymore, but do you ever feel you're expected to be this outstanding prodigy? Like you have all these expectations to live up to?"
Seonghwa hummed thoughtfully. "No. I see it more as a goal to reach."
"But do you think it's attainable? Don't you ever worry you won't be good enough?"
"Of course I worry. Everyone does, but I don't think Luke would've chosen us if he didn't think we were capable." Seonghwa turned to you, his hand sliding over to take hold of yours and give it a squeeze. His touch was warm and brought comfort to you almost immediately, chasing away your worries. "Let's switch to a brighter subject, like lightsabers."
You raised your brows, shooting Seonghwa an unimpressed look at his pun.
"That was completely unintentional."
"Whatever you say." You teased.
"Back on the subject, when do you think Luke will let us build our lightsabers?"
"When he thinks we've earned it, I guess."
"I hope it's soon."
You nodded in agreement, turning back to the stars above, your gaze drifting to look at the distant planets surrounding Ajan Kloss.
"You know, one day we're going to be real Jedi." Seonghwa's voice broke you from your daze.
"I know. Despite the lingering worries, I'm looking forward to the day when our training is complete."
"Can you imagine? The two of us going on missions together, tag-teaming the First Order, taking down the Sith." He held his hands out in front of him, holding an imaginary lightsaber as he mimicked its noises, swinging it left and right.
His little performance made you giggle, his laid back and silly personality always bringing a smile to your face.
"Then maybe I'd do one of these." He held his hand out towards the ground below, a small rock lifting from the grass as it was flung off into the night by an invisible force.
You chuckled amusedly. "Always trying to show off those abilities, huh?"
"No." He grinned softly. "But if you and I are ever in battle and someone gets too close to you, I won't hesitate to Force choke them."
His comment jarred you a bit and you shook your head. "We don't do that."
"I know... but I'd do anything to protect you."
A small noise left the back of your throat when your eyes cracked open, your mind fuzzy as you slowly came to. Your eyelids fluttered, blurred by tears which you blinked away, eyes adjusting to the dim holding cell you'd been tossed into earlier. Bringing a hand up, you wiped the small amount of wetness away from your eyes and propped yourself up on your elbow, wincing when you felt a soreness in your neck. Your hand moved down to your throat, gingerly touching the tender skin, hissing softly at the sensation that followed.
You swallowed back tears that threatened to well up, realizing just how much Seonghwa had changed. He physically hurt you.
Not once did it occur to you that Seonghwa had crossed over to the Dark Side. There wasn't an ounce of evil in him, so it was never a possibility. You just assumed he had given up being a Jedi and went off to another planet to live a life away from the Resistance. Luke's passing hurt both of you and you wouldn't have blamed Seonghwa if he refused to be taught by anyone else.
But that's not what happened.
The Dark Side got to him... or someone.
Seonghwa's eyes watched his superior intently as he paced about the control room, his cape billowing dramatically behind him.
"Why was she here?" The maroon-haired Sith hissed angrily. "How did a Jedi sneak in here?"
"The troopers told me she arrived with someone else on a First Order ship." Seonghwa responded, his hands resting behind his back.
"They have one of our ships?" He spoke through gritted teeth, jaw tightening.
"It appears so."
"Go talk to her. Ask her what she was doing here. Do whatever it takes to get the information if she refuses to talk."
"We have people for that." Seonghwa mentioned, feeling his gut twist uncomfortably at the thought of facing you again.
"I want you to interrogate her. Do you have a problem with that, Mars?"
"No."
"Then do as I say. Interrogate her."
"Yes, Hongjoong."
You sat upright when the door to your cell groaned open, your eyes landing on Seonghwa. Your body moved on its own, scooting back on the cot to put more distance between you both. Perhaps you subconsciously feared him a little now after what he did to you.
He noticed the way you cowered a bit, but his expression remained the same, unchanging and giving away no indications of how it made him feel.
"Why are you here?" He inquired firmly, his voice carrying authority.
His question was met with complete silence. This agitated him, his jaw ticking with annoyance. "Answer me."
"I won't." The words were uttered quietly.
"Why are you here?" He asked again.
You shook your head. "I won't tell you."
Seonghwa lifted his hand and you flinched, waiting for the pressure on your throat. Instead, he lowered his arm, dropping it at his side.
"I know the Resistance sent you." He almost spat the name out in distaste. "Why?"
"You know I'm not gonna tell you."
He let out a small growl, his top lip twitching.
"You're in no position to withhold information from me."
That sparked a bit of annoyance, your almost cowardly behavior changing as you sat up straighter on the cot. "Oh yeah? What about how you withheld information from me?"
Seonghwa's brow twitched at your harsh and sharply-spoken words.
"You didn't think to tell me you were considering running away?"
"Why would I have told you?" His eyes narrowed. "It wasn't your business."
"Because I'm your friend... or at least I was. If something was bothering you, you should've told me."
"Friend?" He scoffed. "You were teacher's pet."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Don't play dumb. You were Luke's favorite. He always praised your fighting style and nitpicked mine, said I was too showy and aggressive. Well, I found a place that accepted my fighting style—accepted me."
"Luke accepted you, Seonghwa."
"Don't call me that."
"It's your name."
"Not anymore."
There was a long and heavy silence that followed and it almost felt like, in that time, you were mourning the loss of a friend.
"She what?" General Leia stared wide eyed at Poe who'd just relayed to her that you had been captured.
"They got her."
Leia sighed, lowering her head.
"She planted all the devices though." He added. "So we can listen in and see what they're up to."
She nodded. "We need to start getting a rescue team together for Y/n as soon as possible. Until we're able to bring her back, we see what information we can get from the devices she planted. Pull up the audio." She gestured towards Han Solo, who stood beside her.
He messed with the control panel in front of him, pressing buttons until voices came through.
"What do you mean she won't talk?" An angry male voice questioned.
"She won't tell me why she's here." A second male voice spoke, this one deeper than the first. "She refused."
Leia's brows twitched as she and Han shared a look, both of them finding the voice familiar.
"I told you do whatever it takes to get her to talk." The first male continued, sounding more vexed than a few moments prior.
"I—"
"Does this Jedi girl mean something to you, Mars? Are you going soft?"
"No." The response was firm and clipped.
Han reached up to rub at his scruff contemplatively, his mouth downturned in a deep frown. "I know that voice."
Leia turned to him in silent question. She also recognized the voice but couldn't quite place it.
Han sighed, dropping his hand. "It's Seonghwa."
Three days passed, or what you assumed was days. It was hard to tell. Seonghwa continuously came back to question you, sometimes multiple times a day. You refused every time, not daring to give away any information. He often became irate at your refusal and stubbornness, but he never harmed you again.
Seonghwa stood on the opposite side of your small cell, arms crossed and thick brows tugged together, that same scowl on his face.
"You were sent here by the Resistance. Why?"
"You're the one giving them information on our base, aren't you?" You responded to his question with one of your own.
Being locked away, you had time to think. And now that you knew Seonghwa was a Sith and the First Order was working on finding the Resistance base, it only made sense that your old pal was helping and possibly feeding them information.
"No." He denied firmly, his reaction almost coming across as offended that you'd assume such a thing.
"What do you mean no?"
"I haven't told them anything." He hissed through gritted teeth.
That made you pause, whatever response you had prepared died in your throat the second that sentence left his mouth.
"Why?" Was the only word uttered.
"I'm asking the questions here. Why were you sent here? Did Leia send you?"
Your expression hardened, but Seonghwa saw right through it.
He scoffed. "I knew it."
A sharp puff of air expelled from your nostrils as you mentally cursed yourself for not denying it right away. Though there's no telling if he would've believed you or not, especially if he claimed to already know.
"Why did she send you? Why were you lurking the halls?"
"I won't tell you. I'm loyal to the Resistance and I won't do anything to put them in danger."
"Of course you won't." Scoffed Seonghwa again, your answer not surprising. "How loyal of you." His words were laced with venom and mockery as he spat them out.
It made an uncomfortable knot form in your stomach, wondering what lies they fed your friend to make him so full of loathing.
Every interrogation ended with Seonghwa storming out of your cell in a fit of rage, reporting back to Hongjoong with no new information and receiving a harsh verbal assault in return. It was a repetitive pattern and one the former Jedi was growing tired of.
"It's been a week." Hongjoong hissed out, pacing the control room. "And you still have no information for me."
"She refuses to speak."
"Perhaps she needs someone more forceful."
"No!" Seonghwa took a step towards Hongjoong to block him as he attempted to exit the room. He then cleared his throat before repeating in a more stern and confident manner, "No. I have it under control."
"If you had it under control you would've tortured her until she spilled. Then I wouldn't be waiting for intel. I'll interrogate her."
Seonghwa side stepped again. "I said I have it under control." He doubled down on his words.
Hongjoong's expression hardened, his intense gaze searching Seonghwa's face for what felt like an eternity before speaking.
"Three days. If you haven't given me any useful information by then, I'm stepping in."
"Yes, Hongjoong."
The following day, Seonghwa was back in your cell, staring at you with the same stony expression. "When will you give up?"
"Never."
"Tch." He scoffed at your never-ending defiance.
"Why do you keep grilling me?"
"Because you're the prisoner here and my superior wants to know why you were sneaking around the ship like a little womp rat."
Your features twitched in mild agitation at his slightly stinging words. "How do you feel knowing your buddies are trying to track down the location of our home?"
Seonghwa scowled and crossed his arms. "It's not our home."
"It is. You still have a place there, Seonghwa."
"Quit calling me that." He hissed out through gritted teeth.
The room grew quiet and you were left to sit in complete silence for a few moments until you spoke up again with another query.
"You know where the Resistance base is. Why haven't you told them?" You asked, knowing that if he relayed that information to his superiors, the First Order would've already attacked Ajan Kloss by now.
Seonghwa stiffened almost imperceptibly and you wouldn't have noticed if you weren't focused on his body language.
"That's not my business."
"Oh but it is. It's your former home, as you claim, so wether you're willing to accept it or not, you have ties to it. If you despise the Jedi so much why haven't you exposed us?" You questioned pointedly. "Why haven't you given away our whereabouts and watched our planet get destroyed?"
It was clear he was growing indignant, his sharp brows tugging closer together, forming eleven lines between them—a sign he was provoked by your words.
"I'll be back to question you again tomorrow. You'd better be ready to give me what I want or it won't end well for you, Y/n." There was an undertone of foreboding in his words as he turned on the heel of his boot and exited the cell, his black cape billowing behind him.
He paused just outside the room, his dark eyes turning to stare at you through the gated window for a moment before he walked away.
Seonghwa paced around his room, tugging frustratingly at his hair while having an internal battle with himself. Why? Why hadn't he told Hongjoong or anyone on the ship about the Resistance base when he'd been actively watching them follow leads and attempting to track down the group? He knows the location. Not only that, but he's had multiple opportunities to divulge that he knows who you are, yet he's kept his mouth shut. He could've easily said something, so why hadn't he?
His ambivalence on the matter was making his head ache. On one hand, he had grown to loathe the Resistance with every fiber of his being and would do anything to destroy them, but on the other... no.
Seonghwa shook his head, gripping at his hair out of agitation while dropping down to sit on the edge of his bed.
"Don't be weak." He gritted out.
There is no "on the other hand". He despised the Resistance. He didn't care about anyone there.
A ghostly giggle echoed in his mind, your giggle, one he remembered from the past. Along with it came a flash of you sitting across from him with a bright smile on your face, then a fleeting image of Master Luke.
Seonghwa gave an angry shout, standing up and withdrawing his lightsaber, activating the red beam that hummed when extended fully. His shoulders heaved up and down with each labored breath while his eyes scanned the empty bedroom.
His weapon lowered. No one was there. What was he trying to fight? His past?
The lightsaber was deactivated and Seonghwa slowly sat back down on his bed, the mattress sinking under his weight. His grip on the hilt of his saber tightened as his mind wandered back to you. He had to get information out of you or Hongjoong would step in and he didn't want that.
As soon as the revelation passed his conscious mind, Seonghwa froze. Why did he care wether or not Hongjoong interrogated you? He shook his head as if to push away any notions that he still cared for you. He didn't—did he?
"Why did you have to show up, huh?" Seonghwa asked pointedly the next day while trying to interrogate you once again. It was the first question he asked when he entered your prison cell.
"I'm sorry?"
"You've just made everything more complicated!" He spat, letting his emotions run rampant.
Perplexed, baffled, caught off guard—any one of those words or phrases could've described how you felt in that moment. What did he mean?
"I was doing just fine without you." He added, the harshness in his tone unwavering.
You recoiled at his words, murmuring, "I don't understand."
"Of course you wouldn't."
"What are you talking about?"
"This is your fault!" He pointed an accusatory finger at you.
Your wide eyes locked on the tip of his index finger that was directed at you.
"What's my fault? Seonghwa, I—"
He let out a raging shout that reverberated on the metal walls. "There you go again! Just stop!" He dropped his head, gripping handfuls of inky hair, letting out strained sounds through his teeth. His inner turmoil was showing through his aggressive responses and bouts of fury.
"Talk to me." Your gentle words reached Seonghwa's ears, striking him directly in the chest.
Instead of being snippy with your words, you toned it down, especially after witnessing his display of stress. It didn't matter if he was a Sith. That fact didn't erase any of the memories you shared together and you still thought of him as a friend—or at the very least, a friend that could be redeemed.
The kindness in your voice touched Seonghwa, but at the same time it was making things worse for him, leaving him torn between two opposing emotions.
"I left that life behind." He said, his head still buried in his hands. "Seeing you just... stirred things up."
Ever so slowly, you got up off the cot and took a few tentative steps towards him. He didn't realize you were approaching, too caught up in his own emotions. It was only when he felt your hand gently touch his shoulder that he flinched, raising his head.
"Why'd you leave? What happened?" You asked.
"I was upset." He sighed. "I tried to get my anger out by blowing off steam in the training room but that wasn't enough. So I stole a junky ship and took it out to a nearby planet just to get away from everything for a bit." His eyes showed just how much he was struggling as he spoke.
"Go on." You urged him. "I know you might not think so, but you're still my friend."
His eyes met yours, a flicker of warmth growing in his chest and giving him that little push to continue. "I was walking through a little town trying to clear my head when Hongjoong approached me."
"Who's Hongjoong?"
"My superior." He ran a hand through his long messy hair. "He knew right away that I was a Jedi. He took me into a nearby tavern and bought me a drink. We talked. I told him about Master Luke and how it was frustrating sometimes because I felt as if I wasn't enough. He was so... sympathetic. He made me feel important and told me he would be a better teacher than Luke and that I had untapped potential—that I had purpose Luke didn't see."
"He got to you while you were vulnerable." You stated, shaking your head. "He got into your head, Seonghwa."
"No." His brows creased, eyes narrowing as he responded in a stern manner, jerking away from your hand on his shoulder. "He didn't. When he took me in I was able to fight the way I wanted. I got stronger when Hongjoong trained me."
You shook your head. "He manipulated you."
"He didn't." Seonghwa denied firmly. "Because of him, I realized my purpose."
Your expression fell into one of pity and sorrow as you shook your head, realizing just how badly this Hongjoong guy had warped your old friend's way of thinking.
"I shouldn't expect you to understand." Seonghwa remarked bitterly. "You're a narrow-minded Jedi."
His words hurt, punching you directly in the chest. You really thought you were getting somewhere with him.
"This was a mistake." He grumbled, turning to leave. He let himself get too vulnerable.
"Seong—" The cell door slammed shut, making you wince. "...hwa."
Heaving a sigh, you slumped back against the wall in defeat. You almost caught a glimpse of the old Seonghwa. He was opening up, but he still believed Hongjoong was the good guy in this situation. The hold he had on Seonghwa was too strong and you needed to break it.
The Sith's footsteps were heavy, each thump from his boots echoing down the corridor while a violent storm of thoughts swirled around his head. You were so sweet and genuine, it almost reminded him of how things used to be. And that gentle touch of your hand on his shoulder sparked something.
You're getting weak. He could practically hear Hongjoong. Are you really going to let her get to you with all that mushy stuff?
"No."
Seems that way.
Seonghwa's jaw tightened as if this were all happening in real life.
"I said no."
You're still in love with her, Mars.
"I'm not."
He passed by a couple stormtroopers standing guard on that particular cell block, their heads following the Sith as he passed, muttering to himself.
"What are you looking at?" He snarled at the staring pair, his hand raising as a threat to use his Force abilities on them.
"Nothing." They shook their heads frantically.
"Thought so." He spat, continuing down the corridor.
That night was a sleepless one for Seonghwa. He tossed and turned for what was probably hours, unable to even doze off. Tossing back his black sheets, he swung his legs off the bed, letting out a forceful sigh. You really messed with his head... and his heart. He could still feel the way you laid your hand so gingerly upon his shoulder.
He got to his feet and shuffled over to a wooden chest at the foot of his bed, opening the lid and reaching inside, producing your lightsaber from it. After he had you taken away, he picked up the saber and had been keeping it in his bedroom, unable to hand it over to the seized weapons department for some reason. He gazed down almost wistfully at the silver hilt adorned with unique engravings. His thumb absentmindedly traced over the patterns engrained into the metal while his mind wandered back to a memory that had long been locked away.
"Place the energy core near the kyber crystal." Luke instructed, watching you and Seonghwa.
The components of your lightsabers were scattered along the work table as each of you focused on building your respective weapons, listening to each step you were given.
"Next is the focusing ring. Make sure it's calibrated just right or—"
"Or the kyber crysal will crack." You and Seonghwa finished in unison, chuckling in amusement at the situation.
"Yes, or your sabers could explode when you activate them." Luke added.
The pieces were put into place and you moved on to the next step, adding each component until the assembly was complete. Next came the cosmetic aspects of the process, the step that would give your lightsabers their unique appearances.
The both of you were taught how to customize your weapons with Luke by your side to assist when needed. This ritual of sorts meant a lot to you and Seonghwa, as it was a rite of passage, a symbol that you had grown as Jedi.
"I hope my lightsaber is blue." Seonghwa murmured once the assembly was complete, always having favored that color.
"There's only one way to find out." You placed your thumb on the power button of your saber and counted down before activating your respective weapons.
Just as Seonghwa had hoped, a blue beam extended from his hilt and his eyes went wide with excitement. He then turned to look at your humming blade that glowed a unique purple.
"Not many people have that color." He gaped.
Your round eyes stared at the stunning beam in awe, unable to believe that the weapon you wielded was yours.
Seonghwa felt the same, gaping at his own lightsaber, feeling it's weight and ogling at the shiny chrome silver metal of the hilt.
"I'm glad I got to do this with you." You turned and smiled fondly at Seonghwa, your eyes glimmering with unadulterated joy.
He returned that warm grin. "Me too."
A single tear dropped onto the handle of your lightsaber, stirring Seonghwa from his nostalgic daze. He blinked away some of the moisture in his eyes before wiping them, not realizing he had started crying.
He still cared for you.
He still loved you.
Today. Seonghwa had to get answers today or Hongjoong would step in and take matters into his own hands. He decided last night when he couldn't sleep that he didn't want that to happen and he would do whatever it took to get the necessary information out of you.
"How many days has it been?" You asked when you heard the door groan open, your back facing it.
"Ten." Seonghwa responded, standing just inside the room as he'd been doing since day one. "I'm asking again, why were you on the ship? Why were you sent here?"
You rolled over, your expression weary. "So we're back to this?"
Seonghwa didn't answer, his expression showing hardly any emotion. He was there with a task to complete.
"Tell me." He wasn't demanding or hateful, but there was a tinge of urgency in his tone.
You sat up, pushing back your hair with a sigh. "Can we just drop this for a second?"
He appeared unsure, but let out a reluctant exhale and moved across the small space to sit beside you on the bed. It was the first time he'd done so since you were locked away.
"I missed you, y'know." You didn't care if he believed you or not. You had to let him know.
His gaze lifted to meet yours, his eyes becoming round just like your memories recalled.
"It hurt me when you disappeared. I had just lost Master Luke and then I lost you not long after. It crushed me." Your voice was thick with emotion as you spoke. "I always wondered where you were. I worried about you. I lost sleep over you. I never once thought you'd turn to the Dark Side."
"Neither did I, but I fit well here."
"No you don't. That Hongjoong guy got to you while you were vulnerable and took advantage of your weak state. He got in your head and made you feel special. He doesn't care about you like he says he does."
"And how would you know?"
"Because he's a Sith and they're known for being conniving and manipulative."
Seonghwa became quiet, not fully believing your words about Hongjoong being disingenuous, but feeling as if he shouldn't carelessly disregard them either. Despite that, a sense of urgency to defend his superior rose up within him. "Hongjoong was there for me and picked me up when I was at my lowest."
"I could have done that. I would have done that if you hadn't left."
Seonghwa's jaw tightened as an uncomfortable ache became present in his chest. Perhaps guilt?
"I loved you, Seonghwa."
Those next words were a punch directly to the gut, the breath feeling like it was knocked out of him. You loved him? For how long?
He swallowed thickly, his breathing shaky. "Why did Leia send you here? To collect information? To spy?" Again, his tone wasn't demanding, but it was stern.
It hurt not having him respond to your admission, but instead of letting it get to you, you pushed aside your feelings and looked him in the eye. "I won't betray the Resistance. You can keep me here as long as you see fit, but I won't say a word."
It was obvious you didn't realize the magnitude of the situation, but Seonghwa remained somewhat calm, hoping a more gentle approach would coax it out of you.
"You don't trust me anymore?"
"No." Your response was swift. "I don't. You're the enemy now."
"But you said you still saw me as a friend."
"There's exceptions to that statement."
He was getting nowhere with you yet again. However, you did open up about how you felt when he ran away so perhaps there was hope.
"Fine." He stood up and left without another word, hoping to get more time to interrogate.
Hongjoong was discussing something with one of the navigators on the ship when Seonghwa approached. "Ah, Mars." He strode towards his apprentice. "I hope you have good news for me."
"I'm getting through to her."
The redhead's expression fell into one of disappointment and annoyance. "So you haven't got any information out of her?"
"I'm trying to. I've taken a different approach and she's coming around."
"But you still haven't got any information out of her." He stated factually.
"No, not yet. I just need one more d—"
Hongjoong's jaw tightened and he held his hand up, Seonghwa's breath hitching as he was forced aside, the invisible pressure around his throat increasing.
"Three days, I said."
"I... know." Seonghwa choked out.
"I gave you three days and you still have absolutely nothing. You're useless, Mars." He spat out.
Seonghwa gasped for air, his booted feet slipping along the flooring while he was being held slightly off the ground.
Hongjoong released his invisible grip on Seonghwa who fell to his knees, leaned over his hands which were planted on the floor as he took in ragged breaths.
Looking around, he saw some of the control room staff turned in their seats staring at him as he lie crumpled and weak on the floor. Meanwhile, Hongjoong was talking to a stormtrooper as if he hadn't Force strangled his apprentice. In that moment, as he was struggling to bring air back into his lungs he realized you were right. Hongjoong didn't care about him.
You're useless, Mars. The words echoed in his mind on repeat.
"Take me to her cell." Hongjoong's voice reached Seonghwa's ears, causing him to lift his head. "If you want things to get done you have to do them yourself." He complained to the trooper, taking a glance back at Seonghwa with a demeaning expression.
"Wait!" He coughed.
The maroon-haired Sith paused and turned to look down at Seonghwa who was just managing to get to his feet.
"You said three days. The day isn't over yet." He spoke hoarsely, but kept a steady tone so as not to give away how his lungs burned.
"Alright. I want results by the end of the day."
The door to your cell opened up and to your surprise, it was Seonghwa again. He sometimes showed up multiple times a day to interrogate you, but never this quickly. It had only been about ten minutes since he left.
He was rubbing at his throat with a gloved hand, his eyes looking frantic.
Something was wrong.
"Seonghwa?"
"Look, I need you to give me a reason as to why you were sent." There was that sense of urgency in his tone again, more obvious than earlier. And he didn't even snap at you for calling him by his real name.
"What happened?"
"Things won't be good for you if you don't cooperate." He ignored your question and you noticed how scratchy his voice sounded.
It wasn't hard to put two and two together.
"He hurt you."
Seonghwa stiffened and you knew your assumption was correct.
"You have to tell me, Y/n." His gaze turned serious and the desperation in his tone rose. "If you don't..." He hesitated to continue, but did so anyway. "Hongjoong is going to interrogate you instead and he won't be gentle or kind."
You'd known Seonghwa since you were kids and could tell when he was worried, but this wasn't worry—this was fear. All this time you'd refused to speak and all it took for you to crack was for Seonghwa to be in distress.
"I was planting listening devices." You caved, spilling almost immediately.
"Where?"
"In the West corridor near the hangar, in a meeting room, and in the control room where the ship is piloted."
His eyes met yours, turmoil and concern swirling around his brown irises. "I'm sorry it had to be like this."
And that was the last thing he said before turning away and leaving.
"I have news." Seonghwa announced, entering the control room.
Hongjoong turned towards him, an expectant look on his face.
"She cracked."
"It's about time."
"The Resistance base is on Takodana."
"Takodana?" Hongjoong repeated, raising a brow. "She told you that?"
"Yes."
"It's not the information I asked for."
"But it's helpful to us. It's what we've been working towards for weeks." Seonghwa mentioned.
"That's true." Hongjoong gazed out at the vast galaxy.
"Who cares why she was on the ship? We have their location."
Hongjoong nodded, murmuring, "Takodana, huh? Why didn't I think of that? It's a forest planet; the perfect place to go off the grid."
"Exactly."
Hongjoong snapped his fingers, beckoning the First Order's battle coordinator over. "I want you to send a fleet to Takadona right away." He ordered.
"Yes, sir." The man nodded before marching off.
Hongjoong passed Seonghwa, stopping long enough to say, "Maybe you can be useful after all."
His watchful eyes followed the redhead until he left the room before he made any moves of his own, exiting the control area and heading directly for the meeting room.
There was only one room on the ship used for meetings and Seonghwa knew exactly where it was.
Slipping into the empty meeting room, he surveyed the area, checking in crevices and corners before peeking underneath the large circular table in the middle of the area. Sure enough, there was a small device no bigger than the tip of his finger under the edge of the table. Stepping away, he began pacing around, mulling over the gravity of what he was about to do. Taking in a deep breath, Seonghwa prepared himself for what he was about to say, knowing it would change everything.
"I don't know who's listening to this but I need your help. It's me..." He hesitated. "Seonghwa. I don't have time to explain everything but I've just told my superior the Resistance base is on Takodana. They're sending a fleet of troopers that way immediately. Reinforcements here will be low. I need you guys to come and get Y/n out of here." He paused before adding. "Get us out of here. I'm ready to come home."
With a call for help sent out and no time to waste, he could only hope someone was listening as he left the room and put his plan into motion.
He didn't greet you or say a single word when he stepped back into your cell, grabbing your hands and holding them behind your back.
"Come here."
You yelped as you were jerked to your feet.
"Seonghwa? What's going on?" You panicked, wiggling in his hold.
"Be quiet." He hissed, shoving you out the door and down the cell block corridor, stormtroopers watching as he passed.
One of them blocked the way. "What are you doing with her?"
"We've obtained the information we need. She's of no use to us anymore." He responded coldly to the trooper's inquiry.
Every part of your body ran cold upon hearing that and you started writhing even more.
"No! No! Please don't do this!" You cried out.
"I said be quiet!" Seonghwa jerked you harshly before pushing you down the halls once more.
Your breathing was erratic, your hands cold and clammy. Were you really going to die by the hands of your old friend?
Not a single word was spoken while you were guided through the maze that was the First Order ship, awaiting your demise. You were brought to a room and shoved inside, Seonghwa releasing your wrists and caging you against the wall before you could even process it.
"You don't know what you're doing." You spoke shakily. "Please don't kill me. I—"
Seonghwa's lips pressed firmly against yours, effectively cutting off your sentence. A small noise left the back of your throat, your hands pressing against his chest as you fought to keep your eyes from fluttering shut.
He pulled away shortly with a heavy exhale and half-lidded eyes that gazed at you with longing.
"I love you too, Y/n."
Your heart leapt into your throat as he verbally returned your feelings.
"You're... you're not gonna kill me?"
"What? No." He shook his head. "That was just so I didn't raise any suspicions. We're getting out of here."
"We are?" You uttered so quietly you barely heard yourself.
"Yes. This isn't the life for me, Y/n. I miss the Resistance. I miss you. Maybe I was a weak Sith—or maybe my love for you was stronger than the hold of the Dark Side."
"Seonghwa." Taking the sides of his face, you pulled him to your lips, kissing him deeply, this time letting your eyelids slide shut while relishing in the warmth of his mouth.
When you pulled away, he had to blink himself out of the little daze he was in.
"Wow."
"We'd better get out of here alive." You said.
"We will. Just play along."
You nodded. "Got it."
He took your wrists and held them behind your back again to keep up the facade and led you out of the room, back into the ship's corridor. He didn't know how quickly a rescue team could get out there, but if no one had arrived by the time he made it to the hangar, Seonghwa would hijack a ship and get you both out himself.
Your eyes scanned the halls, attempting to look pitiful and helpless when passing stormtroopers or staff. On the inside, however, you were elated that Seonghwa returned your feelings and decided to return to Ajan Kloss with you. Though there was the lingering anxiety of needing to get out safely first. You were still in enemy territory—you both were.
The two of you rounded a corner, nearly running into a man with maroon hair that you didn't recognize, you and Seonghwa taking a few steps back. There was an intimidating aura about the stranger that made you nervous just by looking at him. His eyes narrowed and he turned to your partner.
"This is the Jedi that snuck onto the ship. Why is she out of her cell, Mars? I didn't approve of this."
"We've got the information we need. I'm disposing of her."
You assumed this was the Hongjoong guy you'd been told about and was quick to lower your gaze to the floor, trying to appear non-threatening.
"And why would you dispose of her?"
As they exchanged words, Seonghwa could tell he wouldn't be able to pull this one off. Hongjoong was asking too many questions and wondering why Seonghwa was making decisions on his own without consulting him first.
You too were feeling as if things were about to go south and began worrying about how to defend yourself. It was at that moment you felt something cool being pressed into your palm that was behind your back. Your fingers curled around the object and realized it was a lightsaber—your lightsaber.
"What's really going on here?" Hongjoong inquired. "You've been odd since this little Jedi showed up." He regarded you with a curt jerk of his head, not bothering to look your way.
"I already told you, I'm disposing of her."
"See..." Hongjoong's hand imperceptibly inched towards his lightsaber at his hip. "I just don't think I believe you."
Your eyes widened and you were quick to reveal your lightsaber, activating the purple beam that hummed to life just as Hongjoong withdrew his own weapon. Seonghwa was holding out his lightsaber as well, ready to fight by your side.
"Ah." Sardonic amusement flickered across Hongjoong's features at the sight of his apprentice. "I see. You've switched sides."
Seonghwa's expression hardened and he pointed the end of his red lightsaber at the man. "I'm not afraid to fight you."
"Well you should be." Hongjoong spoke roughly before stepping forward and taking a swipe at both of you.
Leaping back, you two dodged his attack, retaliating with some of your own, both of you swinging your weapons at the Sith who was able to block every single one. You attempted to take a jab at him, but his red beam came up underneath your purple one and pushed it away, making you stumble at the physical force behind the action. He twisted his upper body and held his saber up to block an attack from Seonghwa that followed after yours.
It was clear this man was well-trained and even though he was outnumbered, he was managing to fight both you and Seonghwa without much of a struggle. Taking a step back to put some space between you and the enemy, you continued fighting back.
As soon as he saw an opening, Seonghwa took hold of your wrist. "Come on." He hissed urgently and tugged you down the ship's dim corridors in the opposite direction, fleeing the area.
"You're running away like a coward, Mars!" Hongjoong shouted after him.
"Where are we going?" You asked, pushing past a stormtrooper that stood in the way.
"Get them!" Hongjoong roared in the distance.
"Somewhere away from him." Seonghwa responded, keeping a tight hold on your wrist while guiding you through the steel and metal maze.
While your first priority was to survive, questions started piling up. Questions like: Would you survive? Would you even make it off the ship? Would you ever get back home?
"Here." You were snapped out of your daze by Seonghwa's voice as you were pulled into an open space, a grated walkway stretching across an endless canyon.
Unable to see the bottom of the foggy abyss below, your heart rate spiked.
"Hey, it's alright. Just stay close." Seonghwa gave your hand a reassuring squeeze, hurrying across the bridge. "We can still make it to the hangar from here."
"There you are."
You both froze at the sound of Hongjoong's voice, spinning around to face him as he approached with an intense and almost psychotic look in his sharp eyes.
"Stay back." Seonghwa was quick to push you behind him and rush forward to engage in battle with his ex mentor. You leaned against the railing of the grated walkway, looking on with wide eyes.
Seonghwa let out a grunt when Hongjoong's saber clashed with his, pushing against it. With clenched teeth and trembling hands, he shoved back and managed to get Hongjoong off of him. The Sith let out a low sound of disproval and swung once more, relentlessly attacking Seonghwa and giving him no time to fight back. All he could do was block and guard himself from the onslaught. You couldn't stand watching the battle persist without you. There was no telling how long Seonghwa could maintain his defenses until he was worn out. With no one to watch his back or help take the pressure off, you feared he wouldn't make it out of the fight unscathed.
"What happened? You used to beat me all the time during our practice battles." Hongjoong talked down to Seonghwa in a derisive tone.
The ex Sith let out a low noise from the back of his throat while taking a swing at the redhead who merely leaned back to avoid the humming beam of light.
"You're weakened already." He remarked snidely. "Do you really want to go back to being a spineless Jedi?"
Instead of responding, Seonghwa narrowed his eyes and took another swing at Hongjoong only for him to dodge again.
"You belong here."
"I don't!" He snapped. "I never did."
"I took you in."
"You took advantage of me!"
"And you became a powerful Sith because of it. So you should be thanking me."
"Thanking you?" Scoffed Seonghwa. "For what? Turning me into an evil monster?"
Hongjoong let out a huff of amusement. "For showing you your true potential, Mars. So tell me, are you with me or against me?"
"My name is Seonghwa." He grit out through his teeth.
"Very well. Chitchat is over." Hongjoong used his foot to kick Seonghwa back, his body colliding with the steel flooring of the bridge. A grunt was forced out of him, his deactivated lightsaber now lying by Hongjoong's foot.
"You don't need this anymore." He said, kicking the weapon off the side of the walkway and into the abyss below.
"No. Stop!" You shouted, rushing towards the two, unable to stand by any longer. You didn't care if Seonghwa told you to stay back, he needed your help.
Hongjoong held up his free hand, a powerful force pushing you back so vigorously you were sent through the air. You yelped, landing roughly on the grates as your lightsaber skidded across the platform. The breath was knocked out of you during impact, your throat and lungs attempting to work correctly again while you gasped for air.
"This is what happens when you betray me, Mars." Hongjoong spoke in an eery singsong voice.
Your eyes widened as he moved to stand over Seonghwa, lightsaber positioned and ready to strike. A sudden burst of energy and determination hit you as well as a wave of burning hatred towards the maroon-haired Sith, fueling your need to protect Seonghwa.
Your hand shot out towards your deactivated weapon, wheezing and coughing as you focused your energy. The saber shot from its position at the edge of the bridge and straight into your palm. Gripping the hilt of the lightsaber, you got to your feet and rushed over.
"This is the end for you." Hongjoong reared back and went to swing his glowing blade down on Seonghwa. As he did so, your purple beam was thrust forward, blocking his before it could even get close to doing any damage.
"What?" Hongjoong hissed out, his eyes drifting up to meet yours that burned with rage.
"I don't think so." You spoke lowly, pushing upwards and using your lightsaber to shove his away.
Seonghwa stared up at you in both shock and awe, using the opportunity to scramble back out of the crossfire as you went after Hongjoong with vigor.
"Do. Not. Come. Near. Him." You spat out between attacks, punctuating your words with each clash of your blades.
"Oh. Well, this is certainly interesting." Hongjoong chuckled over the sounds of battle.
Your lightsabers made that familiar electric sound as they collided, swinging in every direction possible. Any time you saw an opening, you went for it, even if Hongjoong blocked. There was no pattern to your attacks, just endless swipes and vicious swings.
"You took him away from me!" You raged, slinging your lightsaber at him while he struggled to fight back. "Three years!"
He stumbled while trying to back away, blocking your relentless hits.
A flicker of panic flashed across Hongjoong's face as you continued to shout at him and deliver swing after swing. Up until that point, he had defended himself and didn't show an ounce of fear. Clearly, he wasn't expecting you to go into a blind rage, but seeing him preparing to end Seonghwa's life kicked you into gear.
Your saber came at him from the side, which he deflected, but you didn't care, redirecting and taking a different approach. He hissed when you managed to swipe at his arm, tearing the fabric of his sleeve and slicing his skin underneath.
"Look at you trying to defend your boyfriend. Such mindless violence. You would've made a good Sith." Hongjoong grunted out while trying to provoke you despite the fact that you clearly had the upper hand.
"Shut up." You grit out, slinging the purple beam you wielded at his leg, causing him to yelp in pain, pressing his free hand to his calf where the fresh cut was.
"I'm impressed." He panted heavily, looking up at you. "You're putting up quite the fight."
He tightened his hold on his lightsaber as your eyes narrowed. The humming beam in his grip came barreling towards you, making you jump back. He gave you no time to retaliate, coming at you again. At the last second, you held your hand out, fingers outstretched as his weapon came to a stop in midair just a few inches from you. The heat radiating from the blazing light brushed your palm, but it wasn't enough to deter you. Hongjoong's cocky expression fell, his eyes darting between you and your hand which was keeping his lightsaber in place. He pushed down, trying to complete his action, his brows pulling together at the effort and exertion. Your hardened gaze stayed locked on the Sith as you moved your open hand forward, forcing the beam further away until you pushed it aside. He stumbled back, releasing a low guttural sound from the back of his throat.
"Not bad... for a Jedi."
Your jaw tightened at his backhanded comment. "You talk too much."
Blinded by anger, your free hand shot out, using the Force to launch him backwards across the bridge and all the way into the halls of the ship where he landed harshly against a wall. He winced upon impact, sliding down and crumpling on the floor in a heap.
The adrenaline coursing through you slowly started to wear off, your shoulders heaving up and down with each breath.
"I thought Jedi didn't Force choke?" Seonghwa asked amusedly from behind you while getting to his feet, referring back to something you said to him years ago.
"That was a Force push. There's a difference." You remarked with a small grin, deactivating your lightsaber and sliding it into its holster.
"That was... kinda hot."
You turned to him as he came to stand by your side, a hint of a smirk playing at your lips. "Was it?"
"It was." He confirmed, taking your hand. "Now let's get out of here."
The both of you hurried across the grated walkway and past Hongjoong's unconscious form, heading back the way you came, your footsteps thumping against the metal floors.
"Hongjoong ordered a fleet of ships to Takodana." Seonghwa mentioned while you moved down the halls. "There won't be as many reinforcements here, so we should be able to make it to the hangar without too much trouble."
"Takodana?" You echoed confusedly.
"I told him that's where the Resistance base was."
A fluttery feeling blossomed in your chest. He lied to his mentor to protect the Resistance members.
"Thank you."
He gave you a small smile, squeezing your hand. "You're welcome."
After turning a corner, you were met with a cluster of stormtroopers that jumped into action and began blasting at both of you the moment you were spotted.
Seonghwa grabbed you, tugging you around the corner and out of the line of fire.
"Well, this is a problem." You breathed out heavily. "We're outnumbered and you don't have a weapon."
"Yeah. Though we might be able to make it if we make a run for it and do our best to dodge. Their aim is horrible anyway."
"Not if we're close enough to shoot." You pointed out.
While you and Seonghwa were strategizing, the thud of something heavy falling to the floor came from where the stormtroopers were, followed by another thud and another. Preceding each thump was the sound of a blaster of some sort, but it was different than that of a trooper. The rap of footsteps heading your way made you both tense up and prepare to defend yourselves until a familiar face rounded the corner.
"Someone call a rescue team?" Han Solo asked with a grin.
"Han." You let out a mix between a laugh and a sigh of relief. "How did you know we needed help?"
"Seonghwa told us using one of the listening devices you planted."
"You heard me?" He asked, relieved that his call for help didn't fall on deaf ears.
"We were listening the whole time. We had a team of Resistance members monitoring the audio at all times." Han responded. "Now let's get you two outta here."
He beckoned you both forward, bringing you around the corner to find stormtroopers scattered about on the floor, each of them sporting one or more holes in their chests, their armor marred by burn marks.
"You took them all out by yourself?" You asked, stepping over one of the bodies.
"I've had lots of practice, kid." Han responded, moving on down the corridor.
The three of you jogged through the halls, proceeding quickly while sweeping the area. Your escape wasn't an easy one as more stormtroopers came up from the opposite direction, blocking the way.
"Stop right there!" One of them shouted, holding his blaster.
Han Solo pointed his own gun at the group of armor-clad troopers while you activated your lightsaber again. When they saw you were going to put up a fight, an onslaught of red plasma blasts blurred past. You moved in, ducking and dodging shots while taking a swing at the nearest stormtrooper's legs. He shouted in pain and fell to the ground, giving Han an opportunity to take him down while he was vulnerable.
Seonghwa, weaponless, used his Force abilities to push away the troopers that got too close, shoving them into one another. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to stop them.
"Hey, kid!" Han Solo called out to Seonghwa. "Thought you might need this so I brought it just in case." His glossy chrome lightsaber was tossed over. "Found it in Y/n's room."
Seonghwa's eyes widened, looking at you with surprise. You were about to ask Han why he was even in your room to start with, but Seonghwa spoke before you could.
"You kept my lightsaber in your room?"
Your cheeks were set aflame at his question before you shot one back at him without thinking. "Where were you keeping mine, huh?"
Now it was Seonghwa's turn to become flustered, his ears turning red.
Oh.
"Now's not the time for all this." Han spoke gruffly, using his blaster to hit a stormtrooper.
"Sorry." You and Seonghwa spoke in unison, his blue lightsaber activating.
A smile that couldn't be suppressed no matter how hard you tried spread across your face, a wave of nostalgia and joy filling you at the sight of him. It was just like old times.
Seonghwa lunged forward with a shout, you following behind with renewed vigor as you both went at the stormtroopers, knocking their blasters out of their hands and swinging your sabers, slicing through their armor easily. Any troopers you or Seonghwa didn't get were swiftly shot down by Han.
"I think that's all of them." You huffed out.
"Well then let's get out of here before more show up." Han Solo nodded with his head, urging you and Seonghwa forward.
Much to your relief, the three of you made it to the hangar where thankfully no stormtroopers were lingering about. Your feet moved faster, following behind Han to the opening of the hangar, looking around for his ship.
"Where's—"
His loud whistling cut you off as he waved his arm in the air, signaling something out in space. Seconds later, the Millennium Falcon came flying around the back of the First Order vessel.
"Step back." Han ordered as the Falcon eased into the hangar, the loading ramp extending from the bottom. "Come on, come on." He ushered you and Seonghwa up into the ship where you both followed him to the cockpit where Chewie was manning the controls.
Chewbacca stood up so Han could take his place, a joyous noise leaving him when he saw Seonghwa standing there beside you. He was immediately pulled into a big hug by the Wookie who was elated at the long-awaited reunion.
"I missed you too." Seonghwa chuckled, patting Chewbacca's back.
You too were pulled into a tight embrace, laughter bubbling up out of you.
"It's good to see you, big guy." You told Chewie, pulling away.
"Alright everyone, buckle up and hold tight. We're getting the heck outta here." Han Solo said.
Seonghwa's return to Ajan Kloss was a momentous occasion; he was welcomed back with open arms and firm handshakes, but not from Leia. From Leia, he received a suffocatingly tight hug.
"We're happy to have you back." She murmured tearfully, smiling up at Seonghwa. "And thank you for your distress call. Han insisted on being the one to bring you two back."
"Really?" You asked.
"Yes. We were getting a rescue plan together but it wasn't ready to be executed. As soon as we heard the call for help, Han started prepping to leave right away."
"Y/n, you're alive!"
You turned to see Poe walking over with Finn following behind.
"No thanks to you." You teased, giving him a hug.
"Hey now, I came right back here and told everyone you'd been captured." He defended lightheartedly, his eyes drifting to your friend standing beside you. "Ah. You must be Seonghwa! This girl right here talks about you nonstop. I wish I knew where Seonghwa was. I hope Seonghwa comes back. You would've liked Seonghwa. I hope we find—"
"Okay." Finn came up, chuckling awkwardly and grabbing Poe by the shoulders, slowly pulling him away. "That's enough out of you."
To celebrate your rescue and Seonghwa's return, the droids and cooks prepared a massive meal for the camp. The both of you stuck around the tent for a while to chat with Resistance members before deciding to go off somewhere for a little privacy. And that place was atop the Millennium Falcon.
"I missed the food here." You sighed fondly, rubbing your stomach. "The meals I was given on the First Order ship weren't great... no offense."
"None taken." Chuckled Seonghwa. "It was subpar at best. Even when I was a Sith I missed the food here."
You laughed softly, gazing up at the stars like you'd done years ago, seated with your legs crossed. When you turned back, Seonghwa was looking at you and had leaned in closer.
"This is nice." He murmured softly.
"What is?"
"Being up here with you."
Fighting back a smile, you responded. "And why's that?"
"Because I can finally give you a proper kiss."
He leaned in and placed his lips gently on yours, tentatively at first. Your eyelids fluttered shut and you allowed yourself to get lost in the moment now that you were both home and safe. His hand slid around to cup the nape of your neck, guiding you to lie back while his lips slowly danced over yours, making you melt. Once you laid down, he leaned over you and depended the kiss by tilting his head and picking up the pace. A mix between a soft sigh and a hum left you, your hands moving up to run through his long locks.
"I love your hair like this." You murmured against his lips.
"Yeah? You like it longer?"
"I do." You brushed your digits through it, making his eyelids flutter, a low noise leaving him before he dove back in for a passionate kiss that took your breath away. His hand that wasn't cradling the nape of your neck slid down your side to feel your curves through the fabric of your gray tunic.
Your fingers gripped at his inky hair, making him groan against your mouth, sending a flurry of butterflies to your stomach. His pillowy lips captured your bottom one, surrounding it in warmth before he encompassed your mouth wholly with his and making your head spin in the process.
When he pulled away, you were both panting shallowly, looking at each other with half-lidded eyes that were glazed over with adoration and longing for one another. It was a picture perfect moment; you and the man you loved lying under the stars together, reunited at last.
"I love you." Seonghwa murmured reverently, caressing your cheek tenderly with his thumb as you both gazed at one another lovingly.
You smiled softly at him before responding, "I know."
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Taken Care Of Audio (read story first)
TAKEN CARE OF (WITH AUDIO)
Pairing: Reader x Ellie Williams
Summary: NSFW, 18+ ONLY, minors do not interact. You will be blocked. Ellies had a long, hard day on patrol, and after stitching her up she requests some TLC.
Warnings: Smut heavy, sub!reader, dom!ellie, face riding (E!receiving), oral (E!receiving), masturbation (R!), cum eating (kinda)? Praise kink, minor blood kink, pain kink, stitches, boob play (E!receiving), first time smut writing, did not proof read (but probably should have...)
Author's Notes: Soooo I've never written smut before, lmfao. I made the audio first, for my thirsty Ellie girls on tiktok but this audio got a bit… out of hand (wayyy too graphic) so I didn't want to post it on there. I had a whole scenario in mind with the audio so I figured I might as well write it down and share it here. I am also very obsessed with Ellie receiving so I subconsciously brought that to life while editing the audio. I know it's not great, but it was very fun to make and write soo.. Please be nice to me, I'm sensitive. Lol. (I put in the story when the audio clip applies, the story starts with context) I’d like to improve my writing cause this was a good time so any advice would be appreciated!!
I hear the door downstairs creak open and shut, a bit louder than normal. I can track the footsteps marching to the stairs and I listen with a small smile as the thuds make their way up. I hear soft profanities getting closer. Ellie is home.
Sitting on our bed I turn my head right in time to see the door open, grinning at her as she walks in. She has that crease in her brow that I recognize as her tell-tell sign that she had a shit day. She shoots me a sly glance before looking away to take her flannel off leaving her in a white tank, dirty and disheveled she pulls it over her head.
My eyes trace down her back, scarred and bruised. Muscular, and toned. Heart flutters, and a familiar heat builds. It's crazy how after all these years just seeing her still triggers these primal feelings. She just does something to me. She always has. My eyes stop wondering when I see a deep fresh cut following the curve of her hip.
“Shit els? What happened” I get up and pace towards her keeping my eyes on the wound.
She bends over pulling her shoes off, losing her balance a bit and mumbling a frustrated “fuck” under her breath. Now behind her, I prod at the gash and she swears again. I can feel her flinch.
“I'll go get the stitches, sit down.” I say pulling her to the bed. She hits the bed with a thud and leans her elbows onto her knees.Shaking her head “it's not that bad babe, im fine.” She looks up at me and gives a half-hearted smile.
“I know you're fine,” I say, giving her a gentle look “I just don't want it to get infected, okay?”
“Anything you say doc” she says with a smirk before turning to address the cut herself. She touches it lightly and winces when her fingers make contact. I head to the bathroom across the hall from our room and grab the small white kit from the medicine cabinet, and make my way back to our room. She's still sitting at the end of the bed, now rolling her neck side to side.
I plop on the bed behind her, “okay, are you gonna tell me what happened now?” trying to distract her as I begin stitching the gash closed. Her back flexes and I hear her sharp intake of breath. Heart flutters.
“Fucking stalkers. I hate those things” she says, shaking her head and looking up to the ceiling. “I was on patrol,”
“With Jesse right?”
“Don't remind me,” she says with a scoff that is cut off by another huff as I add a new stitch. Damn. Every breath in sync with the sutures releases a morbid butterfly into the pit of my stomach. “Yeah, I was on patrol with jesse. We were checking out that one restaurant by the lodge, and I found an entrance to the attic. That place has been cleared out for like forever, so I went up on my own and got jumped by a stalker.” she shrugged her shoulders. “Fucking thing nailed me into an old piece of plywood. Piece of shit.” I tie her last stitch off, and give her a gentle pat to tell her she was finished. I got up and made my way to the bathroom to put the kit back.
I turned in the doorway on my way out, “Maybe you should’ve been more careful.” She swings her head at me with squinted eyes. I shrug and turn, heading to the bathroom “just saying!”
“Fuck off” she calls back, I lightly laugh.
Back in the bedroom, she's lying on her stomach, head resting on her hands. “And then of course Jesse had to give me a fucking lecture about not going anywhere on my own, team communication! All that bullshit.” She turns onto her side propping herself up with one arm, “I’m just so fucking over it.” she looked absolutely exasperated. Oh how I love her dramatics. I sit facing her and her free hand falls to my hip. She looks at her hand, then up to me. Those green eyes, familiar and warm. Home. I smile at her.
“That sucks. I'm sorry. I mean Jesse should know by now, there's no getting through that thick skull of yours. What's a lecture gonna do?” I smirk at her.
“Ouch.” she sneers at me, one brow up. She lets out a quiet laugh, and looks back down to her hand on my waist. “Thanks for stitching me up babe.”
“You know I don't mind.” I say casually. She smiles, an inside joke painting a picture on the walls of her thoughts.
“So weird that you're into that.” she chuckles
“I'm not into that.. I just..” her eyes darted to mine. My heart pounded in my ears. She's right, but it was just so blunt. “There's just something about a strong woman who needs my help.” I say fawning innocent eyes, partially joking, but subconsciously egging her on. She sees right through me.
She raises her eyebrows, taking her hand from my hip and pushing herself up so she's sitting opposite of me. She smiles, “so stupid.” her eyes drift down to my lips, then back to me. I feel red flush my cheeks. Her gaze darkens slightly, noticing. She tilts her head looking at me. “I mean it's okay that you are, i'm not kink shaming” Her hand meets my thigh, electric, and she gives me a sideways smile. I gape at her, trying to make light of the tension building between us.
“So you like taking care of strong women? Yeah?” she says quietly with a smile in her voice as her eyes trace down my body to her hand. Her thumb started circling the sensitive skin of my inner thigh. “Funny, you're normally the one that begs to be'' she looks up at me teasingly “taken care of.” Fuck. I feel heat pool in my belly. My knees squeeze together by their own volition. She feels it and her teasing gaze turns to something else as her eyes shift to them. She bites her lip subtly. This woman.
Her hand moves to the button of her pants, “well i did have a hard day,” she undoes it and glances at me with an evil smile. “And since you enjoy taking care of strong women” she pulled on her zipper. “Mind doing me a favor?”
Jesus Christ.
“What do you have in mind?” I say, wide eyed. I try to sound cool but my voice comes out hungry. Starved. I watch the switch flip in Ellie's eyes at my words.
“Take your shirt off.” she demanded with raised brows, and before I could think I was pulling her baggy shirt I was lounging in over my head. I'm left sitting there topless, with nothing but my black underwear on. She rolled famished eyes over my bare skin for what seemed like an eternity. Her eyes settled back on mine. I fidgeted my hands in my lap, feeling suddenly too vulnerable. She leans in slowly without breaking eye contact and my breath catches. Inches from me she whispers “Take off my pants.”
Immediately I am in her service, at her beck and call. She knows all she has to do is ask. I'll do anything for her. She leans back onto her hands and lifts her hips slightly as I peel her jeans down the soft, yet lean, curves of her hips. Down her thighs, over her knees, and then calves, my eyes tracing every line of her legs. I toss them on the floor, and look back up to her awaiting further instruction. Her eyes are smiling with a dark inflection.
“Lay down.” I looked at her confused, thinking I was the one taking care of her. Her tone was not a question however, so I obliged. I centered myself on the bed and pulled the nearest pillow under my head, keeping my eyes on her as she stood up and took her white boxers off. My breath caught in my throat at the sight of her. Pretty, untamed. My knees squeeze, I don't try to hide it. She looks at them, and scans back up to my eyes. She stares into me as she walks around the bed to my side. I bite at my nail anxiously.
“I want you to take care of me, make me feel good m’kay? Can you do that for me?” she asks with a small smile. I nod.
She looks over me once again (START OF AUDIO) “fuck, you look so pretty.” She climbs onto the bed, looking at me like prey to a predator. “Be a good girl for me” she whispers, as she swings one of her legs over my head. Shit, I get it now. Her pussy meets my lips and she lets out a soft “fuck” at my eager mouth. My arms wrap around her thighs, hands gripping soft flesh. She starts to move, pleasuring herself on my tongue. She moans softly, “needed this” she says desperately as her eyes drift close and her head drifts to the ceiling. Her taste envelopes me, her wetness growing by the second with the addition of my saliva wetting her folds.
“Okay,” she moans, picking up her pace, grinding against my face. She looks down at me, before her eyes dart shut “There!” I feel her body pulse at the peak of her thrusts and I know she's found her spot. Her bud flicking roughly over my tongue. “Oh shit.. There. There we go” she continues at her pace for a moment. Her pulsing getting stronger. Her eyes snap open and peer at me “Jesus, you feel so good.” she says as her head rolls back and her eyes closed again. She continues her rhythm as I pull my arm from under her leg and skim my hand up her body “okay” she says lost in the sensation. My palm cups her right breast and I squeeze impatiently, then rub a loving thumb over her nipple, circling it. “Damn… yeah” she sighs then her hand meets mine and squeezes the sensitive flesh with me “Baby just like that.” she bites her lip with a whispered “fuck” as she rides my face.
Her moans and the graphic sound of her wetness fill the room. I reach my other hand down into my underwear and begin circling my own clit firmly, unable to avoid the tension building within my own body. “Fuck me.” she whines into the air, before looking down to me with adoring eyes, “that's my good girl.” her eyes tighten, “lets go” she whispers as she begins to grind harder and faster into my mouth. “Come on.” My hand on my core meets her pace. “Good. There. Okay. There we go” I love how she talks mindlessly when we fuck. Her voice is enough to bring me closer to my own apex. I begin moaning beneath her, unable to contain my own pleasure. She looks down at me “shhhh shh shh shh” she hushes as she pulls my hand from my aching clit before I can reach my undoing. I whimper in disappointment as she pulls my arm from beneath her leg and takes my other one from her chest before pinning them above my head in her strong hands, deepening her weight into my face. “Shut up” she corrects.
Her rhythm continues and I can tell the new pressure she's added is building her quickly. “God damn.” she says as her eyes squeeze shut. “Okay” That same wrinkle between her eyes deepens again, this time out of pleasure. She rides harder pushing the back of my head further into the pillow. Her moans grow louder, more animalistic. her hands on my wrists tighten to the point that I am sure that there will be a mark. “Holy fuck” she gasps. She pushes hard against me and I can feel the pulse intensify, her sounds grow and grow until suddenly her hands let go of my wrists and bury deep into my hair, pushing me even further into her just at the right time when her head falls back in quiet breathy moans, she rides out her high on my mouth. Her legs shaking and clit pounding as I suck against it, encouraging her. Tasting her. Worshiping her. She lets out a whimpering breath at the end of her climax and looks down at me beneath her. “Oh my god babe.” She slowly lifts off of my face and I see her flinch slightly at the air touching her sensitivity. She takes a breath before looking at me with a lazy smile.
“All right. Your turn.”
#ellie williams#ellie x reader#ellie williams tlou#ellie smut#ai audios#ellie williams fluff#ellie williams x you#the last of us#the last of us ellie#ellie williams x reader#ellie x y/n
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Heroes and Their Reputations
Pairing: As of right now there isn't one- trying to decide if this is going to be more than this silly one shot lol
Word Count: 2.8k
Warnings: none really?
Genre: kinda fluff mostly... comedy I guess is accurate
Summary: The Avengers may be Earth's mightiest heroes but there's plenty of room for improvement especially in the public opinion category, so what happens when the team is given a PR manager?
***
"Listen, I can tell you right now, this transition will not be smooth." Fury warns you as you walk down the hall.
"Oh come on Fury how bad can they be?" You scoff.
"Most of them are- fine, I'm sure the reception will be overall positive but at least one of them will try to run you off and you need to prepared."
"I've got pretty thick skin so I think I'll manage. Plus I've got a few tricks up my sleeve to deal with that sort of thing believe it or not." You say.
"Alright. I'll call you in in a moment." Fury says. He enters the meeting room while you wait in the hall. It takes a while for his head to pop out to call you.
"You ready?" He asks.
"Sure." You say kicking off the wall and entering the room.
"Avengers. Meet your new manager." Fury announces to the room.
"Hey everyone, my name is y/n. Like Fury said I'll be your manager moving forward." You say.
"Sorry, what does having a manager entail exactly?" Bruce asks, adjusting his glasses.
"All of your missions, any official public appearances, interactions with civilians online or in person, that'll all go through me now. I'll also deal with government officials on your behalf and any legal situations you may end up in."
"So you're a lawyer?" Clint asks.
"No, we have lawyers. She's just here to oversee you all so that you can be held to a standard." Fury says.
"We don't need a manager." Tony scoffs.
"Oh yes, you do." Fury says.
"It can't hurt." Thor shrugs.
"Don't be ridiculous Thor. Look, sweetheart, we've managed just fine on our own so far so I see what they're trying to do here but it's pointless and I will not be answering to some random figurehead they've brought in to play babysitter." Tony says.
"Okay, let me make one thing clear, Anthony, sweetheart, we're playing my game now, so you play by my rules or you don't play at all." You say.
"What's that supposed to mean?" He narrows his eyes.
"How do I explain this? If I'm a coach, I'm not going to put players in the game that I know are just going to continually rack up penalties, that's a poor game plan. The public doesn't trust you, it's my job to change that. So if you make my job harder you will no longer go on missions or even leave the tower. It's pretty simple. Fall in line or Iron Man will effectively be out of commission until you can be trusted to behave."
"Nice try but you can't do that." He scoffs. You cock an eyebrow at him and snap. His body tenses to a halt for a moment before you unfreeze him.
"My game. Understood?" You ask.
"W-w-what t-th-the f-f-f-f-fuck w-w-was th-th-that?" Tony wraps his arms around himself, shivering in his seat.
"What did you just do to him?" Steve's eyes widen.
"You have powers?!" Wanda asks excitedly.
"Nothing deadly." You wink at Steve. "Yes." You smile at Wanda. Bruce's hand hesitantly raises as he speaks,
"When you say nothing deadly-"
"Mr. Stark's body temperature was briefly at 28.2 degrees Fahrenheit. Low enough to freeze his blood but not for long enough to kill him." Vision informs the group.
"You frozehis blood?!" Sam gasps.
"What the fuck kind of power is that?" Clint asks.
"Are you some sort of demigod?" Thor asks.
"Technically I control water. Vision darling can you get him a blanket or something? The shivering is... excessive." You say.
"Of course." Vision says with a nod.
"F-F-F-F-Fury d-did y-you know a-a-ab-b-bout th-th-this?"
"It's got nothing to do with my job so it's not like it's on my resume, but if anybody would do the extra research on me it'd be Fury." You say. Vision returns then and drapes a blanket over Tony who pulls it tight around himself.
"Just want to make it clear that I did not know you could do that. Why the fuck you ain't mention that before now?" Fury looks at you.
"I did say I had some tricks up my sleeve." You shrug.
"We'll discuss that later." He tells you.
"Am I the only one not understanding how water manipulation lets you freeze blood?" Sam asks.
"Blood is made up of mostly water. I can control the water within blood. Goes for other things too, clouds, mud- anything really."
"So you froze his blood?" Bruce asks with wide eyes.
"Just to prove my point. I wasn't gonna kill him." You reiterate.
"I like our manager." Natasha smirks.
"Thank you." You say. Fury pulls out his phone and sighs.
"Imma leave y'all to get acquainted. Don't turn anyone into an iceblock in the meantime." He warns.
"She's already done that." Clint says.
"Fine, don't turn anybody else into an iceblock. If you insist I get technical." Fury rolls his eyes.
"You aren't seriously going to leave us with her Fury." Tony says breathily, his body finally warming up enough to talk normally.
"Don't push her buttons and you should be fine Tony you're an adult."
"Only in theory." Steve mutters and you let out a small laugh at his dig.
"I've told her not to freeze anybody, don't piss her off and you'll be safe." Fury reiterates before leaving the room.
"So-" you take a seat at the table with everyone and rest your chin in one of your hands propped up at the elbow. "Questions?"
"So are you like our boss?" Natasha asks.
"When you say monitor our interactions online what does that mean?" Steve asks.
"You mentioned public appearances. Will we be doing press conferences? Because I don't really like the idea of having to sit and answer a bunch of questions on a panel." Bruce asks.
"Since when do we have a team of lawyers?" Clint scoffs.
"Also what do you mean when you say missions go through you?" Sam asks.
"So when I said questions I didn't mean everybody throw them all at once. Natasha, technically speaking kind of since you guys do have to answer to me. Steve, you all are an interesting bunch, I assume none of you do but if any of you had a social media presence at all I would be monitoring that to make sure the things you're engaging with don't make you look any worse. Bruce, you probably won't be doing press conferences exactly because I can't say I trust you all to answer questions live like that but we do need to do damage control on your image as a team so you'll be making strategic appearances over the next few months at events and such so that the public sees you in a better light. Clint, the first thing I told them when I was hired was that a group of superheroes needs a legal team especially if the government is poking their noses around here so I put one together. Sam, Fury will send your missions to me, and I'll decide who goes on which ones based on your skill set as individuals and cooperatively."
"How did you remember all of those questions?" Steve binks.
"Do you know our skill sets?" Clint asks.
"I've seen some of your- combat, clips go pretty viral of the big ones, so I have an idea but I'll be scheduling targeted trainings with each of you to observe more directly over the next two weeks." You say.
"So, what happens in the meantime? Until you know our strengths if there are missions then what?" Natasha asks.
"Steve seems the closest to a leader here. I'll take his suggestions regarding assignments and go from there." You say.
"Cap is not our leader." Tony scoffs.
"Well, it's certainly not you." You roll your eyes. "Does anyone else take issue with me consulting Steve for your mission assignments?" You ask, a hand up to stop Tony from whining more.
"Nope." Bruce says.
"No." Natasha says.
"I'd rather Steve than Tony." Clint says.
"I trust Steve more than Tony." Wanda says.
"I'm here because of Steve- so, only makes sense." Sam shrugs.
"Vision? Thoughts?" You ask.
"My vote sways nothing as everyone else has unanimously chosen Captain Steve Rogers."
"No Vision this isn't about statistics, I asked because you're part of the team and your opinion is as valuable as everyone else's." You tell him.
"In that case, I think the most reasonable choice for who you should consult would be Captain Rogers."
"All of you have betrayed me today." Tony says.
"Cut the drama Stark you are far too impulsive to be calling any shots here." You roll your eyes.
"Oh what do you know?" He scoffs.
"I know you're reckless and make decisions without considering those around you, I know you've created more problems than you've solved, I know that you need serious lessons in collaboration because you are by far the worst team player I've ever come across, and this is just from reading your file and studying public records, you struggle with addictive behaviors, you have narcissistic tendencies, abandonment issues, self-destructive habits and an overall lack of basic social awareness, you consider yourself generally above reproach, and things like empathy are often lost on you and it makes you nothing short of insufferable to be around. And that is putting it very lightly. Shall I continue?"
"Yes please!" Natasha laughs.
"I get the point." Tony grits out.
"Good! Glad we're on the same page! Now you can stop questioning me because as I'm sure you've realized by now in a game of who can be the bigger asshole, Tony, for once in your life, you will lose. I've dealt with egos 10 times the size of yours and if they couldn't break me neither will you. So fall in line, or say buh bye to the iron suit."
"Oh shit. Fury's a genius." Natasha chuckles.
"What, Nat?" Steve frowns.
"She's here to fix our reputation. I dunno about the rest of y'all but based on today I trust her to do the job gotta be honest." She shrugs.
"Good. Makes my job much easier if you trust me." You say. "Any more questions Avengers?" You ask the group.
"Will you be living here?" Wanda asks.
"No. I don't see a reason to, so I don't plan on it." You shrug.
"What if we need you when you're not here?" She asks.
"Honestly a lot of my job can be done remotely. Since PR has nothing to do with your day to day activities emergencies are unlikely. I'll only be here a few times a week and that's mostly because I don't trust some of you to pick up if I call."
"Uh- when does this observational training start?" Bruce asks.
"We'll start Monday. I'll send out a full schedule later but I'll be starting with you, Tony. 9 am."
"Oh come on! Why me?!" Tony groans.
"Because I know you'll give me the most trouble and everyone else will feel like a cakewalk after." You smile. "If there are no further questions, watch your phones, I'll be reaching out to each of you over the weekend, see you Monday. Try not to do any more damage before then." You say standing and leaving the room. Yeah, you're going to have one hell of a time with this team.
Monday morning you reach the tower early. You told Tony to meet you in the training room at 9 o'clock, so at 8:45 you find a meeting room and have your coffee.
"Friday?" You call out.
"Good morning y/n."
"Good morning. I want a view of the cameras in the training room, and please make sure nobody knows that I've arrived at the tower yet." You say.
"Aren't you meant to be meeting Mr. Stark shortly?"
"Mr. Stark will be experiencing a series of trials today. The first of which will be a test of patience. Which means he cannot know I'm already here. Okay?"
"Understood."
"Thank you." You settle in at the round table sipping your coffee and kicking your feet up as you prepare to hang out here for a while. You watch Tony enter the training room at 9 on the dot. For the first 10 minutes, he seems to just be idly waiting. He checks his watch a few times, paces the room, lets out the occasional impatient huff. After the twenty minute mark, he calls you, which you promptly ignore. He starts to do minor training stuff, jumping jax, hitting a punching bag, messing around with weights. He calls again at forty minutes. You still don't answer. You watch him for a full hour before you leave the meeting room and finally make your way to where he's surprisingly still waiting.
"Good morning Anthony." You say casually when you walk in.
"Good mor- where have you been? You told me we were meeting at 9 am it's not 10:07. I've been waiting for over an hour."
"Well technically I told you to be here at 9 am. Never said anything about me being here at 9 too. But I have been in the tower. I was in a meeting room. Watching you. Planning the rest of the morning."
"So- you've been here since 9 am and you just- what? Decided I could wait?"
"I've been here since 8:45 actually. I wanted to see if first of all you'd be punctual and secondly could you wait indefinitely without direction simply because I told you to be here at 9." You say.
"You're telling me I just wasted an hour of my time in here for your amusement?" He crosses his arms.
"You lack patience and discipline, so I'm testing you."
"By wasting my time?"
"By challenging your equanimity."
"Challenging my equanimity? Really? That's you're justification for wasting an hour of my day?"
"Friday please prepare Ironman's training simulation." You say rolling your eyes at Tony's complaints.
"Simulation loading, please wait." Friday responds.
"We're not done with this conversation." Tony says.
"Oh yes we are. I think you're still struggling to understand how this works, I don't answer to you Tony. Now if you at any point want to go on missions, I suggest you suit up and run the training simulation I've prepared for you." You say.
"You prepared?"
"Simulation complete. Ready to begin." Friday announces.
"It's what I've been up to since I got here an hour ago. Everyone's getting personalized simulations to assess their skills. Yours begins- now." You say stepping back.
"Beginning simulation round one." Friday says and that's the only warning Tony gets before it starts. The training begins with a set of drills, a combination of shooting still targets and dodging projectiles. It takes him most of the hour to finish the first round of tests, and the final sequence ends with him on the the floor.
"I fight in a suit. Why the hell am I running target practice without it?!" He huffs.
"You wanna be a hero you're gonna need more than your rich kid toys to qualify. If it powers down or is rendered useless somehow in the middle of a mission you can't simply become a liability to the team and if you are- I need to know that too."
"Friday." He grits out.
"Yes Mr. Stark?" The computerized voice fills the room.
"Tell Pepper I'll be later than expected coming in today."
"Friday, tell Pepper not to expect him until after lunch." You say checking your watch.
"Yes Miss y/n."
"After lunch?!" His eyes widen.
"Oh relax, I won't be keeping you here that long, it's only 11, but by the time we're done you'll probably want to get something to eat or at the very least change your clothes before going to work." You shrug. "Friday please load the second round of the Stark Training Simulation."
"Simulation loading. Please wait."
"S-second round?" He groans.
"I had four planned, but that first one took you forever so we'll have to consolidate. Put on your suit before she's finished loading, you won't have time to once it starts." You tell him.
"How were you even able to get Friday to do this?" He asks as he forces himself to his feet.
"Fury gave me access to everything on the grounds." You shrug.
"Loading complete. Ready to begin." Friday announces.
"Great. Please begin round two at an increase of five percent Friday."
"Beginning simulation round two at a five percent increase."
"Woah hang on a five percent increase what the hell does that me-" Tony is cut off by a projectile launching across the room. Round two is more combat based using mechanical dummies Friday was able to activate for you. With the speed increase Tony struggles to keep up with the attacks but at least it won't take him over an hour to do them. It takes 47 minutes for him to complete round two.
"Right, I think I've got enough information. I'm going to let you go. I'll save rounds 3 and 4 for another day. Friday please send me the footage from today's simulation runs." You say.
"Understood."
"You plan on being a tyrant your entire time here?" Tony asks.
"What's the matter Stark? Can't handle the heat?" You quirk an eyebrow at him.
"That wasn't just heat that was being thrown into a volcano."
"You know what they say, pressure makes diamonds. I'll be in touch." You say walking out of the training room, already preparing the simulations for your next session, you're thinking Steve.
"Take your time!" Tony shouts after you and you roll your eyes. Maybe Fury was onto something when he warned you it would not be easy with these guys.
***
A/N: should I continue this story? Do we add a love interest? If so who?
#marvel#marvel fanfiction#the avengers#avengers fanfiction#steve rogers#bucky barnes#captain america#black widow#natasha romanoff#wanda maximoff#sam wilson#clint barton#bruce banner#tony stark
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Yet Another Phantom Rework Idea: Ominous Nights
So, now that we have ominous events in Minecraft, and the devs have even talked about the idea of adding more ominous events... as basically the catch all for opt-in harder challenges in the game...
Why not throw phantoms into the generic undead enemies grouping in the game? I kid. I jest. but... hear me out:
Put them in an Ominous Event for night time. Not structure based: Just based around night. Specifically, if you drink an ominous bottle, thereby opting in with the bad omen effect, and try to sleep while you have bad omen that hasnt been cleared or converted into a trial omen / raid omen... Well, you don't skip the night. Instead... you're told that "No amount of rest can pass this night" and a little popup happens with a phantom noise, similar to the raid popup in bedrock edition. Now, you have Nightmare Omen. maybe a little advancement called Ins-omen-ia (ha get it) so what does nightmare omen do? As you may have guessed, it makes the night harder, specifically by making the mobs spawn with potion effects, making them spawn more armored, and changing up the spawning pool, to mostly comprise of the undead. This would include phantoms which would be the signature mob of Nightmare Nights. Of course, as with any ominous event, milk could cancel this, or prevent it entirely... which is a nice nod to having a nice warm glass of milk before bed to sleep better! But anyways, yeah, the whole night would be unskippable, and the effect would last around the length of a whole night. as a failsafe, it'd clear itself if it became day through... someone else sleeping if one player sleep is enabled, etc. and no, it wouldn't effect mob spawns for everyone: just mob spawns for you. Heck, I've seen a mod that makes phantoms grab mobs from the ground and drop them to kill them... and that got me thinking, what if some phantoms had AI goals that made them help out their undead friends, by delivering them right to your face! Some phantoms would just do the usual "fly around, bite you, be a nuisance" and some would be airdropping zombies or flying skeletons around. maaaybe it'd just be a type of jockey lol and as the reward for this? Well, for one, you get to grind more EXP so long as you don't die and lose the effect... but also, what if they just... dropped more rare loot? Or maybe... heck, maybe this is a suitable replacement for Looting if you were to nerf it honestly. I'd do this just for the XP and bones alone... if only zombies had good drops :P ...as for creepers, spiders, witches, and endermen? I have a feeling they'd be exempt from being buffed... I think they deserve their own little things, as they arent undead. Especially endermen (and witches already have raids) So yeah, Ins-omen-iac. If I make it a mod someday, I wanna call it that. I think it'd be cool to just lean into phantoms as being The Hard Mode Undead Enemy ...if theres stuff i left out of this, questions of how it might work, then let me know! or if you have ideas on how ominous / nightmare nights could be improved, you are very welcome to comment/reblog! ty for reading either way! BONUS: You got this far, so I might as well tell you a short, alternative idea I had for phantoms last week before this idea. What if... you know how phantoms circle around in the air, almost like how vultures circle around dead things? Like. i literally saw a vulture irl the other day and i was like "oh, huh, theres probably something dead there" well what if phantoms just... only spawned in specific locations that would basically act as markers for "oh, theres something underground here" whether it be a mineshaft, a monster room, or a whole buncha trial chambers!! it'd be cool, because then you'd be encouraged to explore the surface at night time; to walk into the danger of the night... and see if you can find any phantoms, because if you DO, then you know theres gotta be an underground structure... somewhere nearby. the logic is that, as the undead, they sense the presence of Souls. and ... well, old ancient civilization stuff tends to leave a large imprint of soul-vibes on the world.
...and of course theres also my old post about a phantom rework that boils down to "Stay in the dark long, and you gain insomnia. Be in the light, and it clears up. Phantoms are afraid of light. Deep tragic lore"
I'm proud of all of these ideas on how to make one of my favorite mob designs that I see has huge potential... into an actually INTERESTING and FUN mob! I can totally see Mojang going with involving them in something Ominous related
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Part 1
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Part 3
Fall: I’ve been wondering, how did you get into writing? You seem like you’ve got such a strong grasp on it. It’s kind of intimidating, honestly. You are way too good with your words, especially compared to us, mere mortals.
Shen Yuan smirked as he typed out his reply, leaning back against his hospital bed.
Shizun: You flatterer! But honestly, I’ve spent way too much time hate-reading terrible webnovels and thought, ‘Well, I can’t do worse than this’. Writing fanfiction was kind of a last-ditch effort to keep my sanity after reading PIDW for so long. And…
He started to hit backspace but hit enter instead. Shit.
It took a minute for Fall to answer. Against his hopes, not without asking about that ‘and’.
Fall: “And…”?
Fall: But LOL. I should have known that nothing can beat spite. Not sure if you know - probably you do, since you love PIDW’s world so much -, but there's a commenter, Peerless_Cucumber, who is like that. The angrier he gets, the more eloquent he writes. Barring all the swearing, LOL.
Fall: Shit! Wait. No. Now that I think about it, please, don't check him out! If you two would collaborate, you could take over the world.
Shen Yuan couldn't decide whether to cry or laugh. It seemed, it was a good decision not using his Peerless_Cucumber acc, but it was quite strange to read about himself. Maybe he should tell Fall it was him.
Hahaha. No. Fuck, no.
Shizun: Hahaha, I know about him! Would it be strange if I'd say that I kinda use his long-ass comments/essays as bases for improvement? He is always so detailed with all the problems and issues, it is much better to use those instead of the fan Wiki.
Shizun: So… about the “and”.
Shizun: I used to be quite sickly when I was young. I spent a lot of time in the hospital, and I found out that reading and writing was a wonderful way to forget about the real world. Funnily enough, I'm actually at the hospital rn, turning towards writing once more.
It took a little longer for Fall to answer. Biting into his mouth, Shen Yuan hoped that it wasn't too personal too soon. Shen Yuan glanced at the IV drip beside him, the sterile smell of the hospital room filling his senses. It wasn't that bad.
It wasn't good either.
He wanted to go home. Home had his own bed. Home had his PIDW merch and his favorite pillow his er-ge forbid to bring him to the hospital.
Fall: Oh, shit. That sucks.
Fall: I get that. Reading (and maybe writing, but you may never know) is a safe space for me too. It helps to forget about all the problems in the world, to imagine you are somewhere else, in a better place. Also, I hope you are doing okay! I'm also in a similar situation, so high five bro! (Kinda managed to do something very, very stupid. Did you know that ramen is liquid and liquid does not go well with electricity?)
Fall: On a lighter note, I really think that you are good at writing. You should try to do original work if you want to - you are, like, natural at balancing world-building and character development. I'm kinda jealous, but I've learned a lot just from reading your fic.
Shen Yuan blinked at the screen. It was one thing for random commenters to leave praise, but for some reason, hearing it from Fall felt... different. He found himself smiling stupidly, warmth blooming in his chest. Fall was just so…
He was lovely.
A great “bro”, it seemed. Way to be bro zoned.
Shizun: First of all, don't you dare to
sell yourself short! Not on my watch! You’ve got some pretty good ideas yourself. I can tell from your comments you’ve got a solid grasp on storytelling. Second, what the fuck, Fall?? You okay???
There was a longer pause before Fall replied. Shen Yuan knew that logically, Fall had to be safe, since he could write - they had been communicating constantly for the last two weeks -, but that didn't make it less scary. To know that Fall could have…
To think that Shen Yuan could have died… if either of them died…
They could have never met. It was a strangely disturbing and upsetting thought.
Fall: I'm good, I'm good! Dw!
Fall: Okay, but consider this: I don't think anybody would be interested in what I'd write. What I would like to write about.
Shen Yuan only had one answer to that:
Shizun: I'd read that.
Fall didn't reply for a long time after that, but that was okay. Shen Yuan assumed he needed some time to think about it, and that was okay. He just hoped his friend would realize how much Shen Yuan thought the world of him. He believed in Fall, even if Fall didn't believe in himself.
Shen Yuan, after all, had experience in believing in authors with great potential, who lacked the spine to be themselves and write what they wanted, instead of what the majority of the people demanded.
-*-*-*-
Fall: I've been thinking a lot about SJ and the way you portrayed him handling the Immortal Alliance Conference. It was fascinating to see the parallels. Him killing WY, who murdered those kids to save YQY versus him throwing LBH into the Abyss, believing that he, as a demonic cultivator, also killed all those kids. It was such a great moment! Shocking, because I think we all thought he would not do it since your SQQ wasn't as brutal as Airplane's, but you executed it so well! Oh, I wish Airplanes would have done the same. So heartbreaking! While PIDW created a monster out of SQQ, you created a human.
Fall: I'm also wondering if you plan to make him struggle with that choice later. Like, will he regret it in hindsight?
Shen Yuan considered this, tapping his fingers against his laptop. Fall always asked questions that made him rethink his plans. Actually, he didn't really think that he did such a great job at drawing parallels between the two Conferences, so he planned to switch POVs and continue it from Luo Binghe's, but…
It was actually a great question. The readers already knew about Luo Binghe's experiences in the Abyss more-or-less. Shen Yuan planned to show how staying at a more stable peak affected his physique, but it could be fascinating to explore what happens to Shen Qingqiu meanwhile.
Maybe he could do both…
Maybe-
Shizun: You raised a good question. I think I'll have him grapple with the consequences, it could be interesting to see how things turn out in the mortal world.
Fall: I think you should do it. It would fit your world-building theme… You could make the story feel more real. Like, the world, the characters and their choices have weight, y’know?
Shen Yuan knew exactly what Fall meant.
Shizun: Yeah, you are absolutely right. It was definitely something PIDW was missing - characters suffering real consequences. Even if they did something, be it either bad or good, it didn't really matter, because they either died in the end, or…
Fall: or had sex?
Shen Yuan snorted, typing back quickly.
Shizun: I wanted to say kinky, yet utterly boring papapa, but yes.
Fall: Oh, don't mention it! If I never read the words ‘thrust’ and ‘dangling’ again, it’d be too soon!
Shizun: I hate you.
Shizun: I want to bleach my eyes. I hate those words! And all the euphemisms Airplane use. ‘Flowers’, I get. Even ‘heavenly pillar’ makes sense! But comparing breasts to cow's udders?!?! Sometimes I wonder about Airplane's sex ed background…
There was a longer pause after that. Only his nervous ticks revealed his anxiety over that pause. Was he too offensive? It was not his Peerless_Cuvumber acc, so maybe he shouldn't have been so critical over the papapa scenes? But that was the best part in his friendship with Fall! He felt free to be open, to be himself!
Before he could work up himself, a reply came.
Fall: Maybe he doesn't really like writing sex? Or specifically, hetero sex? Maybe he is…
Shen Yuan stared at the words.
Airplane, his favorite and most hated author might be similar to him?
Maybe.
But…
Shizun: Don't care. I'm gay, and I could write better hetero sex scenes if I wanted to! Sexual orientation is not a good reason to be so bad at something!
Only after he sent the message did he realize that he fucked up. Sure, he might have flirted sometimes as they were talking with each other, but only within the boundaries of a no-homo friendship. But now that he came out in the heat of the moment…
He didn't want to lose a friend.
Fall: Okay, but you are different. You dare to write what you love.
Shen Yuan only realized that he had been withholding his breath, when he could feel himself breathe normally. It was not an explicit acceptance-
But it wasn't a rejection either.
He would take it.
Deciding, he would not bring attention to his accidental came-out, he wrote:
Shizun: If you ever decide to write something, you can also write whatever you wish to. It will be great, I'm sure of it!
There was a break in the conversation, again. He hoped he didn't push hard, since he knew Fall had been pretty hesitant to talk about his own writing in the past, but he hoped his encouragement helped.
Fall: Maybe one day. If I get brave enough to write something worth reading, you’ll be the first to know!
Shen Yuan smiled at his phone, feeling the familiar warmth settle in his chest. He wasn't sure why, but the idea of Fall sharing his work with him first, felt like something worth waiting for. The guy had a way with words, it was obvious from his comments. He was insightful and had an eye for details. Shen Yuan knew that if he ever wrote something he really liked, it would be an instant hit.
-*-*-*-
As the time passed, the day of Shen Yuan’s discharge loomed closer and closer. Which, don't misunderstand him, he desperately waited for!
However…
He had to admit. He didn't really want to leave the Hospital Guy. Sure, he still didn't know much about the guy - not even his name, for fuck's sake! -, but he had grown attached.
Hospital Guy was funny and smart and weird and hilarious. Shen Yuan enjoyed spending time with him, their quiet moments in the garden. He liked talking with/to him about everything and nothing. Hospital Guy was attentive when he ranted about the series he binge-watched between two chapters of PIDW, and they also had the same taste in music! He liked seeing the guy relax, and he loved it even more that he, Shen Yuan, was the reason for his more relaxed state!
He just liked Hospital Guy, okay?! He was just adorable, both inside and out!
So, on the day of his discharge, Shen Yuan mustered the courage to do the one thing he had yet to do: visit the guy's room.
Hospital Guy was clicking wildly on his phone, but the moment he noticed Shen Yuan, he stopped, and focused all his attention on him.
“Hi,” Shen Yuan said, surprisingly shy.
“Hello, Stranger,” Hospital Guy grinned.
“I'm leaving today,” he blurted out. The grin was instantly gone from Hospital Guy's face, turning into an unreadable mask.
It was concerning.
“Oh,” was all he said.
Shen Yuan waited, hoping for something more. A request to stay in touch, disappointment for not continuing their daily walks, or at least a goodbye that felt more meaningful. He waited for something, anything-
But the guy just nodded, his gaze drifting away from Shen Yuan, as if with that, he had already forgotten about the friend he made in the hospital.
Maybe they weren't really friends. Maybe everything was only in Shen Yuan's head.
Maybe he had bothered Hospital Guy all along.
Disappointment surged through Shen Yuan. He’d thought, maybe, there was something there; a connection, a friendship, maybe even more! But the guy didn’t seem to care.
It was as if Shen Yuan didn't even exist anymore.
“Alright,” Shen Yuan said, his voice tight. He would not cry. He would not scream. He would not fight. He would not bother Hospital Guy ever again. “Take care of yourself.”
And with that, he left.
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UNDER YOUR TOUCH
Summary: After her difficult breakup, Tiana wanted to start anew with her life. That's when she realized her life would be better when she met him.
This fanfic is 18+! NO MINORS ALLOWED
word count: 4665
smut warning; it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good at writing ✍🏽 smuts but I’m improving at the moment.
Jey Uso x Tiana
AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.
comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍
ALSO! I don’t not want nobody stealing my fanfics or take it as theirs that will be an issue fasho so keep it cute respectfully.
I only own my OC along with the make up scenarios
But I’ll be writing along the way since this story is in my drafts on Wattpad right now so yuh. 💁🏽♀️
TAGS ⬇️ lmk if you wanna be tag 🏷️ @pinkwithhearts @420days @jstarr86 @empressdede @angiedawn02
@bebesobrielo @biancasreign @punksyeet @papireigns-05 @paigereeder @yana3sworld @aikosilo @fearlesschimera
@zillasvilla @partypoison00 @skyesthebomb @mselenalovebug @magnificentbouquetmusic @xbriexx @celesteheartsjey @charmed-dreamssss @hunnidmilly
XVIII.
TIANA Since I had today off, I spent it watching Baddies Caribbean upstairs in my room. I also considered improving my nail salon as soon as I had saved up enough money to allow me to do the things I needed to do.
I noticed that Trinity had texted me while I was watching my show, so I took my phone off the charger and retrieved it from the dresser.
IMESSAGE 💬 Trin🤭🫶🏽: Hey baby girl! I was just checking up on you. Tiana: Hey, I'm fine Trin just watching my show yk Trin🤭🫶🏽: yeah, have you spoken to your future husband yet? Tiana: Um no I haven't heard from him today why? Did something happen? Trin🤭🫶🏽: Damn ig he didn't tell you Tiana: 🤨🤨 wym? Trin🤭🫶🏽: oh...nothing, nothing girl Tiana: un-unt don't do that girl spill it now Trin🤭🫶🏽: Tiana yk I can't because Josh will kill me if I do so sorry. 😭😭 Tiana: omg yall is honestly scaring me Trin🤭🫶🏽: 😭😭
What the hell was happening today? And what the hell is Trinity talking about, a surprise? I mean, don't get me wrong; I love me some surprises, but this one seems a bit unfamiliar to me.
I brushed off the feeling while scrolling through my socials and seeing what everyone was posting on their stories. Ever since Malakai got sentenced to prison, I've been receiving threats from his people, including Kehlani, but I didn't let that bother me because they're so delusional, just like him.
I saw that my man had posted something. Since he was sweating in the video about his story, I assumed that he had gone to the gym for a little bit.
'God, he looked so fucking fine. I just wanna suck him up so badly.'
While I was eye fucking my man, I heard a knock on my bedroom door, seeing Bianca coming in with my favorite white roses.
I raised an eyebrow, looking at her. "B, what's going on?" This was honestly scaring me. I didn't know what was going on, and nobody was telling me anything.
"Oh, nothing, girl. Josh just bought you your favorite roses." She said.
"Bull shit B what's going on?" I said, folding my arms.
"Tiana, nothing is happening. Also, Jey said to be ready around nine tonight." After she said that, she left the room, leaving me dumbfounded.
I rolled my eyes as I placed the roses in a clear, clean vase. I walked towards my dresser, picking out some dresses that would be suitable for whatever Jey had planned.
rikishi replied to your story: My son will take care of you T uceyjucey replied to your story: you deserve them mama. ❤️ jonathanfatu replied to your story: you'll be so happy for tonight T. biancabelairwwe replied to your story: 🤭🤭 trinity_fatu replied to your story: you'll start crying for sure for tonight. shelovesemma replied to your story: be prepared for tonight girly.
Reading everyone's replies made me think about what Jey had planned for tonight. And what was everyone talking about?
✧.* JEY I was extremely excited about what I had planned for tonight. I couldn't wait to finally put a ring on her finger and call her my fiancée and, soon, my wife, too.
I made reservations at our favorite restaurant around nine, which she loves to go to. After we left the restaurant, I decorated my house with the help of Bianca, Trin, and Emma. I know that she'll love it.
I was at work getting a client's arm tattooed when I heard someone yelling up front. That's when I saw Kierra coming inside the room, and I looked up at her.
"What's goin' on, Keke?" I asked.
"Jey, I think your ex-girlfriend is here, and she's starting shit up front." She said with a perplexed expression on her face.
"Shit ight I'll handle it could you finish up his tattoo for me please?" She nodded her head while I went out of the room to see what was happening.
When I went towards the front, all I could see was Kehlani standing there with her arms folded. I just rolled my eyes. Her eyes darted towards my direction, and as she walked towards my direction, she almost slapped me in the face. That's when I held onto her wrist, giving her a stern expression.
"Kehlani, what the fuck are you doing here?" I asked sternly.
She scoffed at me as she yanked her arm away from my grasp. "Boy, why are you going to marry that bitch!"
"That's none of your business. We ain't even together anymore. We broke up like two years ago, Kehlani. Leave me alone, bro." She shook her head, standing there pouting like a little kid knowing damn well that doesn't work on me.
"No! I'm not leaving you, and that bitch got Kai in prison for five years for something he didn't do. She just made that all up!" She shouted as I stared at her in disbelief.
'She can't be fucking serious right now?'
I couldn't believe what I was hearing right now, her denying that Tiana was never abused and just "made it up" just to get attention when she's really the one trying to get attention.
"Girl, yo' ass is tripping right now; get out before I have somebody come handle yo' little ass." I threatened as she chuckled.
"Who will handle me? Because can't nobody handle me, baby." I rubbed both of my hands against my beard, nodding my head and smirking.
I pulled out my phone and dialed Tiana's phone number.
OTP Mamas🩷: Heyy Papi ZaddyJey🤍: Hey mama what you doing right now? Mamas🩷: I am at the salon getting my hair done why what's wrong? ZaddyJey🤍: send me some pics of it when you're done but can you come to my tattoo shop and handle a certain someone. Mamas🩷: babyyyy I'm going to mess up my hair if I deal with her ass ZaddyJey🤍: I'll pay for it to get it done again just please I can't put my hands on her and she don't wanna leave Mamas🩷: ight ight I'll be there in a little bit. ZaddyJey🤍: ight then mama love you Mamas🩷: love you too.
CALL ENDED
After she hung up, I put my phone back inside my pocket, folding my arms in the process. I stared at Kehlani, who also had her arms folded.
"Was that yo' bitch you just called? I will beat her ass in a heartbeat." Kehlani said confidently.
I chuckled at her, "Yeah, we will see."
"I will fuck her up, Jey, ion' why you're with her ass, including marrying her when you should be marrying me instead." I rolled my eyes at her.
"I don't marry cheaters, Kehlani, and you know that." I said.
✧.* I saw a black BMW pulling up towards my shop, knowing that it was Tiana coming from the salon, and damn, she looked so good right now.
Walking in wearing this cute ass all brown one-piece along with some Nike Dunks can't believe to say that this is all mine. Her eye went towards my direction, then towards Kehlani's, and she rolled her eyes at her coming towards my direction.
She wrapped her arms around my neck as my hands snaked around her ass cheeks, giving them a good squeeze before kissing her on her thick lips.
I gave her a few more kisses, pulling away in the process.
"Girl, you need to go ahead and leave because ion' have time to mess up my hair." Tiana said as Kehlani chuckled at her.
"Whatever, you weren't going to do a damn thing anyway. Pick me bitch." She spat as Tiana walked up to her, grabbing her by the hair.
Tiana dragged Kehlani outside, throwing her on the concrete ground while she winched in pain, holding her body. This was something interesting to watch as I stood there seeing my fiancée handling business.
"I'm not going to warn yo' ass again; don't bring yo' ass back here," Tiana warned.
Kehlani got up from the ground, holding onto her stomach, and glared at us as she tried to run up on Tiana again, causing her to push her into the pole.
Tiana grabbed her by the hair and punched her in the face while Kehlani was covering her head, trying to protect herself.
She stopped fixing her hair and backed up away from me as she stood next to me. I snaked my hand around her waist, kissing her on the cheek, and watched Kehlani struggle to get up.
"God girl, you're so pathetic, man; go do something with your life and leave us alone. Can't you see that we're happy?" She said.
I'm not going to lie. Tiana looked so good. Being all worked up and worried about me just turned me on a little bit.
"I don't give a damn. He was mine first before you even came into the picture." Tiana rolled her eyes at her while folding her arms in the process.
"But you cheated on him, and he left you with someone better, and that someone is me, so you can go ahead and cry like a baby all you want."
Kehlani threw us the middle finger before getting inside her car and pulling out of the parking lot as Tiana and I stood there watching her leave.
"Damn, mama not goin' lie; you look good all worked up." I said.
"Well, I have to protect my man from people like her." She flipped her hair to the side, showing her side profile more.
"Ight ight but why don't you go home and get ready for tonight I'll come pick you up."
Tiana smiled at me as she wrapped her arms around my neck kissing me on the lips before removing her arms from my neck.
"What do you have planned? Like everyone has been weird today." Tiana asked.
I chuckled at her, knowing that I couldn't tell her, or it would just ruin it. "I'm not spilling, ma; you just goin' have to wait and see when I come get you." She rolled her eyes at me, giving me one more kiss on the lips before heading towards her car.
I took a slight peek at her ass while she walked towards her car, and damn, that's such a view for me to see.
I went back inside the shop, and Kierra was standing there looking at me.
"What's up, keke?" I asked.
"Wasn't that the same girl who got her tattoo covered up?" Kierra questioned.
"Yeah? That's my girlfriend, who will soon be my fiancée later on tonight." Once I said that, her face went into complete shock, and her lips parted.
I just chuckled at her facial expressions while heading towards my office.
✧.* OMNISCIENT Tiana was finishing getting ready for her date with Jey, which he had planned for them tonight. She didn't know what was happening or what he had planned, which made her nervous.
As she was getting ready, she saw her phone blow up. She grabbed it, seeing that Malakai's mother was sending her messages.
IMESSAGE 💬 Mrs Jackson sent 3+ messages
Mrs Jackson: I fucking hate you: you bitch now my son will be in prison for something he hasn't done! Mrs Jackson: all he did was love you and adore you! But you had to make these fake allegations against him Mrs Jackson: pick me bitch
Tiana read through the messages thoroughly and chuckled at them before blocking his mother and deleting her number. She checks herself out in the mirror, thinking to herself, 'damn, I look good for tonight. He is a fortunate man.'
"Tiana! Jey is at the door!" Bianca shouted.
Tiana ran and grabbed her purse and keys before heading downstairs to greet her man, who was standing there looking good as always. He never fails to look good.
He was wearing a button-down white top, some ripped jeans, and his white Air Forces, including his piercings on both ends of his ears. He also had a nice, fresh haircut.
She walked up towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck. His hands snaked around her waist, kissing her on the lips.
His lips became behind her ear, making sure nobody could hear what he was whispering to her.
"you look fine as fuck right now, baby; it makes me wanna put a baby inside of your pretty ass." Jey whispered, giving her ass a good grip.
"Joshhhh." Tiana whined softly as he chuckled at her pulling away from each other.
"C'mon, let's go before we are late." She nodded and walked out of the house toward his car.
He started the ignition to his car as he pulled out of the driveway driving to the restaurant.
Jey pulled out a blunt from his glove department and gave it to Tiana to light up for them. She took a few puffs of it before giving it back to him.
He placed his hand on her left thigh vibing out to the music that she was playing in the car as they were driving towards the place.
✧.* They finally made it to the restaurant as Jey blindfolded her, holding onto her waist and carefully walking her towards the door.
While he was doing that, the host walked them towards their tables. Tiana felt a breeze coming from outside, and Jey carefully sat her down in the chair.
When he removed the blindfold from her eyes, her face went wide as she looked at the view from the food and then outside, seeing everything.
He chucked at her reaction as she looked at him with a beaming smile.
"Oh my gosh, Josh, this is so beautiful, like from the view and everything." Tiana complimented.
"I mean, I had to make today special for a reason, but like I said, I won't be spoiling anything, " he said as she poured champagne into the glass next to them.
She couldn't stop looking at the view. It was such a beautiful view; in her eyes, everything looked so small. Tiana felt Jey grabbing her hand and pulling her towards the piano. While he put their glass of champagne down, he opened the piano and began playing Monica Love All Over Me.
Tiana couldn't help but admire her man playing the piano as she sipped off her drink, watching him. She leaned her head on his shoulders, closing her eyes.
He played the piano passionately, kissing Tiana on top of her head and smiling in the process.
After their dinner together, Jey made Tiana cover her eyes yet again, which she hated because she wanted to see what it was, but he wasn't going to let her.
He unlocked his door, taking her upstairs. She carefully walked into the living room, signaling Trin, Bianca, Emma, Montez, and Jon to come out in front. He then removed his hands from her eyes.
Tiana covered her mouth with a shocked expression. When she turned around, she saw Jey on one knee with a ring in his hand.
As everyone was recording this precious moment, she couldn't help but have tears forming in her eyes.
"Tiana ever since I met you that day at my tattoo shop I just knew that you were the one for me I've been through everything with you just how you have with me you have a special place in my heart and I don't regret it mama will you marry me? And be with me forever?" Jey confessed, waiting for Tiana's answer.
Tears flowed down her cheeks as she nodded her head, "Yes," and gave him a hug. He hugged her tightly, tears coming down his cheeks as well.
Everyone around them was cheering and crying happy tears, including Bianca and Montez, who were so happy for their best friend to finally be happy.
They pulled away from each other as Tiana wiped his tears from his face while he did the same to her. He put the ring on her finger; it fitted her finger perfectly, along with the promise ring that she still had.
He cupped both of her cheeks together, placing a soft kiss on her lips. Montez and Bianca ran up to her, giving her a huge hug.
"Tink, you're officially a fiancée girl!" Bianca said excitedly.
"I know I am so fucking happy man." Tiana said.
Trinity came up behind her excitedly. "Welcome to the club, babygirl! " she chuckled at her while staring at Jey, who was dabbing it up with Montez and Jon as they congratulated him.
"Yall were in on this huh." She asked.
"Yeah, of course." They both said at the same time. Tiana just rolled her eyes at them.
✧.* Everyone left Jey's house while Tiana was upstairs in the bathroom, looking at herself in the mirror. She was wearing her lacy red bra and cheeky panties, which Bianca had bought her.
She was fixing her hair before putting in her silky robe turning the door knob seeing Jey lying down on his phone, not even looking her way.
He looked up at her, saw her wearing a silky robe, and tried to figure out what was hiding underneath.
When she loosened the robe and dropped it on the floor, his eyes widened and he fought to regulate his breathing. He was staring at her up and down, so she went onto bed.
His eyes tracked her motions as he placed his phone down, like if she were prey. Tiana straddled into his lap, removing his shirt in the process. He was allowing her to take charge of the situation, something he never did.
She began rubbing all over his chest as he felt his breath become irregular, and she kissed him all over his body. She carried on, seeing him squirm under her touch.
Tiana placed her lips on his neck as she heard a groan escaping from his lips, he gripped onto both of her ass cheeks tightly as he thrust his hips making her feel how hard he was getting for her and only her.
She snaked her fingers down his shorts and into his PSD red boxers, stroking his dick up and down, making him roll his eyes in the back of his head. His lips parted as he murmured gently into her ear as she continued to stroke it, driving him wild.
"F-fuck...mama.." Jey moaned.
Trying to get control of the situation, he clutched her throat firmly while sitting up, his eyes dark and lusty. Placing his lips on hers, fiercely tongue kissing her down her throat while pinning her to the bed, regaining control and authority, he was taken aback by what she did.
"Yo' ass finna get it little mama." He said in a raspy tone.
SMUT WARNING Jey had her arms pinned behind her back as he was beating her shit in; his lips were tucked in while throwing his head back.
He looked down at his view seeing her ass jiggling through his strokes, hearing her sweet soft moans escaping her lips.
It was music to his ears
Slapping her left ass cheek as she whined giving her these punishing strokes while she tried to push him away despite her arms being pinned behind her back.
"D-daddy Please..." Tiana begged.
"Nah take this fucking dick." Jey grunted gripping onto her hips tightly.
'Come with me, come with me Come with me, come with me (You're so fuckin' nasty)'
She couldn't take it, attempting to get away from his strokes, which prompted Jey to grasp a full load of her hair, yank her back, and fuck her senselessly. He made her eyes roll in the back of her skull.
"Shit Joshua..."
"What's up mama?" He says with a raspy tone fucking her balls deep.
Her walls were clenching around him, causing a groan to escape his lips while looking down at his dick sliding in and out of her wetness.
'Came across an oasis in the Mojave Follow any instructions of your body I bottle that shit up, pour it and sip (Bottle, bottle, bottle, bottle, bottle, bottle)'
Her essence was covering up all over his dick, which satisfied him. He let go of her hair pulling out of her as she wailed like a baby going onto the bed lying down, indicating her to come mount him like a pony.
She got onto him reversed cowgirl style, holding onto legs for support while she stuck it back inside of her and began bouncing up and down on it.
Jey watched while keeping his hands behind his head, enjoying his view. He loved the way she rode it like a big girl.
"Yeah, keep ridin' that dick, baby. You doin' so good, mama." He cooed, slapping her ass.
"Uhn, Daddy, this dick feels so good, fuckk." Tiana moaned.
Her skin was slapping against his stomach as she continued to bounce on it while the whole room was filled with her moans and skin slapping.
'Girl, you should taste the water from your well (Bottle, bottle, bottle, bottle, bottle) You ain't gotta tell me what you like, she say it for you'
Meanwhile, Jey sat up with a malicious smirk on his face, clutching her waist and driving his hips up, slamming her shit in as she moaned loudly.
"Joshhhhh oh my goddd."
"Un-Huh ma take this shit, take it." He growled fucking her vigorously.
'I just wanna fuck you 'til you cry, vintage Dior you I need you to hold it 'til you can't, I'll reward you (I can't, no, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't)'
This man had her seeing stars, and she couldn't stop rolling her eyes as he proceeded to assault her moist cunt while she was miserable and defeated by him. "This my pussy mama?" He questioned her as she tilted her head to look into his eyes and nodded.
She couldn't even grasp or say the words because she was so overwhelmed by the pressure and wonderful agony she was experiencing.
Until he grabbed her firmly by the throat maintaining that eye contact that they had. "I'm not repeating myself baby."
"Y-yes daddy! this is yours all yours!" She mewled weakly.
He rolled her over on her back, putting his dick deep inside her in a missionary position while they kept eye contact. Their foreheads are touching as they watch his dick enter and exit her. He kissed her thick lips, holding her throat in the process.
"Talk to me baby, I'm hitting that shit?" Jey grunted.
"Yes Josh yes." Her facial expression scrunched up a bit which Jey took notice knowing that she was going cum so he sped up his pace.
'So, come with me, come with me Come with me, come with me'
Circling his hips and hitting her spot drove her insane, seeing her break beneath him. She clawed his back badly, forcing him to hiss at the agony in his back.
"Scratch me up all you want princess, fuck you're so beautiful."
"Hmm...shit shit shit daddy."
"Keep calling for me baby I'm right here daddy's right here mama."
His beautiful rhetoric turned her on even more, and he marked her up with wet kisses on the neck, letting her know that he was hers and she was his.
'Cuida'o si me pide' duro, que voy y te enchulo Ahora no me suelta', baby, raro que no te haga un baby.'
As Jey continued to pound into her gushy insides, he felt his dick twitching inside her, tucking the bottom of his lip while watching her take his dick like a champ. She could feel it all the way through her gut, and tears streamed down her cheeks as she covered her face to hide it.
'Si quito el seguro, vuelve' de seguro Ay, sí, tocándote así, yo muero ahí Mami, que Dios nos perdone, pero si ven las conversacione', bueno'
What she didn't realize was that Jey had taken note when he withdrew her hands from her face and pinned them down.
"Lemme' see how good I'm fucking you I wanna watch you cum on this dick." He rasped.
"Fuck Josh fuckkkk." Tiana moaned softly gripping on his shoulders.
'Tal ve' no entienden, pichea a la gente y vamo' a empezar de cero La muerdo y le dejo un tattoo, pregunto si le gusta ahí, mmm Yo sé, baby, yo sé, la que se puso a probar fuiste tú'
Tiana let out a loud gasp and rolled her eyes in the back of her head, cumming all over him, while Jey watched her do exactly that. She couldn't stand it any longer, feeling sensitive and her legs shaking violently as Jey held her still, forcing his dick deep inside of her. Jey gasped as he gently thrusted his hips into her, revealing his seeds blended with her essence trickling from her.
SMUT OVER
'Come with me, come with me (Sabe' que te gusta, se siente cabrón, yeah, yeah, oh) Come with me, come with me (Por ley que le caigo si estás home alone)'
Tiana's body shook violently, and she placed her hands on her chest to help her breathing, keeping her eyes closed for a while. Meanwhile, Jey went to the bathroom, using a cloth with warm water to wipe up Tiana. He noticed her shaking, her eyes closed, as he stroked her legs to calm her down. His touch made her feel at ease, and when she opened her eyes, she saw him standing there.
'Come with me, come with me (Ahí mismo, oh, en 4K frente a la cámara, te muevo por toda la recámara, los recibo' están en las sábana') Come with me, come with me (Se prende más con la luz apagá')'
"You okay baby? Did I go to rough on you?" Jey asked softly.
"N-no you're fine love." Tiana softly said.
"Ight imma start us up a nice warm bath okay?" She nodded her head yes as she watched him disappear in the bathroom. She looked at her ring along with her promise ring on her finger.
Tiana couldn't believe that she is engaged now to the man she will soon call her husband.
Under Your Touch.
zillafatu, romanreigns, shelovesemma and others liked your post.
tianasworld: guys I said yes! he went all out for me for this special moment to happen I am so happy to be called Mrs Fatu I love you so much baby🥹💍 @ uceyjucey
uceyjucey: you deserve it all baby you know imma spoil yo' ass rotten Mrs Fatu 😮💨🫶🏼 tianasworld: @ uceyjucey 😩😩 biancabelairwwe: I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU TINK! FINALLY MY BESTIE CAN BE HAPPY AND NOW I CAN CALL JOSHUA BROTHER-IN-LAW🙂🙂 tianasworld: @ biancabelairwwe PLEASE LOOK WHAT YOU DID JOSHUA😭😭 zillafatu: cuzzo popped the question out? okayy I see you I'm happy for yall shelovesemma: I am happy bro like what 🥹 trinity_fatu: welcome to the club babygirl! romanreigns: happy for yall ❤️ rikishi: proud of yall two ❤️ tianasworld: @ rikishi thanks pops ❤️🫶🏼
Read all comments.
tianasworld replied to your story: I am so honored to be Mrs Fatu baby 🥹🩷 jonathanfau replied to your story: finally no mo teasing you put a ring on her finger 😭 biancabelairwwe replied to your story: BROTHER-IN-LAW!! zillafatu replied to your story: I am proud of you cuzzo lmk when the wedding happens most def be there 🫡🫡 rikishi replied to your story: proud of you son ❤️ theylovekehlani replied to your story: you're fucking kidding me right? 😐 trinity_fatu replied to your story: YESSSS
A/N: Tiana is now engaged y'all 🥹 I am so happy for her but what the fuck is they goin' to do with Kehlani ass? She just a pick me atp I'm tired of her ass I'm author and I am tired of her ass is diabolical 😭😭
Also do yall like it when I add the lyrics to the spicy scenes? Or nah? Me personally it brings out more imagination.
THEYRE BACK IN BUSINESS BABY!!! in my opinion I feel like they rushed this a little bit but hey I'm not complaining 💁🏽♀️
But I hope yall enjoy this chapter lmk in the comments.
Stay Ucey.
#jey uso#black writers#black fanfic writer#black oc#jey x oc black#wwelove#black reader#wwe fanfiction#jey uso fanfiction#jey uso smut#SoundCloud
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The sun's light reaches even the darkest depths
Synopsis : Aventurine has a vicious snake in his head, but your voice always chases it away.
Warnings : Spoilers for Aventurine's backstory! It's just references, but maybe some people haven't played the quest yet, you never know lol ; Also intrusive thoughts?? Perhaps?? I'm not sure tbh
Genre : Hurt/Comfort??? Sorta??? ; x reader fic
Word count : 1.2k yoohoo
Notes : I haven't written a fic in more than a year... Forgive me if I'm rusty, but I just love this man so much ugh. Might make a part two from reader's pov this time because I've got lots of ideas!! Do give me advice if you think I should improve some stuff!! You can also request something if you like my writing <3
Even when he steps foot in the comfort of his home, the knot settled in his throat does not go away. Worse, when he inhales the smell of spices, it chokes him even more. (He wonders if you thought about him when cooking, and the idea of him lingering on your mind for longer than he should makes him want to cry.) He removes his coat, trying his best to think about something else as he hears your footsteps approaching. (Are you finally going to yell at him and push him away today?)
“Welcome back, ‘rine.”
Luckily, you greet him when he’s still removing his shoes, giving him enough time to build his composure back up. (How could he face you otherwise?) When he stands back up and meets your eyes, he is once again reminded of exactly why he is so drawn to you. (He knows it’s wrong, but he is helpless against it. Like a moth attracted to a flame, he can’t help but want to stay in your light for a little longer still.)
“It’s good to be back home.” (“I missed you.” he wants to say, but he can’t afford getting too attached to you, just like it’s not good for you to get too close to him.)
He wants to take a step forward, wants to fall into your arms and hide away from everyone and everything else ; but his feet are glued in place, and the weight in his chest is heavier than ever. His throat feels dry, his palms are sweaty, and for a split second he worries that you’ll start asking questions, that you’ll worry, that you’ll take his face in your hands and envelop him in your embrace, wrap him in a soft cocoon of gentleness and care and everything else that he doesn’t deserve. (Has the air always been so suffocating?)
He jumps as the sound of an alarm resonates through the air. He watches you scurry off to the kitchen and exhales a sigh of relief. (Did you notice how he almost lost himself just now? Did you see him bare, his soul completely exposed as his own body failed to obey him? Or did he successfully manage to trick you once more, just as he does with everyone else? He doesn’t know what he prefers.) He steps forward, inhaling once more. The scent of a foreign spice tickles his senses, and the name of it sits on the tip of his tongue, present but not fully here, an image and a distant memory.
It’s only at dinner, when he takes a bite of the food you’ve made, (The voice in the back of his head tells him he doesn’t deserve it, but he would hate to see you upset.) that he recognises it, the name shining bright like a lightbulb in his mind, a single piece of thread that he’s managed to get a hold of. He opens his mouth to tell you, but the silence in the room shuts him up. No words fill up the space, and he finds the quiet unsettling, cold, a shiver running down his spine at the thought. But most of all, he is worried about you. Why aren’t you saying anything? You usually tell him all about your day, about the things you’ve seen, about the plans you’ve made with other people, so why is today different? (Can you no longer bear to entertain him now that you’ve seen how ugly he is on the inside? Have you had enough of his theatrics, of his games, of him? He tells himself that he won’t stop you if you leave, but he knows he will always wake up in the morning thinking you’re still by his side.)
He finally dares looking up at you, worried that he’ll find your seat empty. Maybe you were never there to begin with, maybe you’ve already left long ago? Maybe he’s grown so attached to your love that he imagines you greeting him every day, feeding him every day, holding him every day. Maybe the house is so cold because you’re simply no longer there, because he can’t bask in your light anymore. (It’s just what he deserves, so he shouldn’t complain. He’s always been too selfish with you, after all. Always about taking, never about giving, because he can’t afford to show all of his cards, even with you.)
“What are you thinking about, ‘rine?”
Your voice snaps him out of his daze. The first thing that invades his mind is the fact that you’re here. He suddenly feels warm all over, like his heart is being cradled by gentle arms, like his soul is being taken care of by a kind gaze. (Did Kakavasha feel like that, too? Was it when his sister held his hand, when his mother kissed him on the forehead for the first time?) This time, he can’t prevent his real thoughts from tumbling out of his lips.
“You.”
The expression that graces your face rivals even the Mother Goddess’ blessings, he thinks. As if his word was a prayer, you light up even more than before, gently coating him in your warmth. (How did he even manage to find someone like you?) You smile at him so openly, so genuinely, like you’re not afraid to show him what you feel ; and every time, he falls for it, for you, even harder than he should. You reach for his left hand, and he hopes you don’t feel how his pulse is fluttering under his skin, how his heart is racing just by being in your presence. He loves you. Even if it’s dangerous, even if you leave him, even if he hurts you. Right now, he loves you, and it’s as sickening as it’s sweet, sticking to his lungs like golden honey.
That night, he watches as the moon traces a serpentine path of light on your skin. You’re talking to him, keeping him company as he ties all the strings of sleep together slowly. You still hold his hand in yours, and despite having long since removed his gloves, he can’t get enough of your touch. Even now, you look at him in that special way, with that gaze only reserved for him, and yet he doesn’t recognise the emotion that lingers in it. He doesn’t have time to think too much about it either, because exhaustion is dragging him down. Like an anchor, it pulls at his feet, forces him down in the dark even if he hates it. He squeezes your hand tighter, a desperate attempt to stay afloat, but he’s already too far gone in the depths, your image only a distorted reflection above the water. If he doesn’t come back from there, he’ll at least imprint all of the details of your face in his mind one last time.
Even while he sleeps, you don’t let him go. You hold him close, look at the way his features relax. You gaze at him with an adoration he never notices, doesn’t want to see. Words scratch at his walls, make him feel vulnerable, tear him apart from the inside out, so you never use them. You only hold his hand and lead him somewhere else, so that even if he is lost, he doesn’t have to look far to find his way home again.
#aventurine honkai star rail#aventurine x reader#hsr aventurine#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail#star rail aventurine
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Habits I've successfully developed since my first post🤍
If you've been here since the beginning, you'll know of my first and most popular post where I discuss developing certain habits to improve my life.
Here it is: https://www.tumblr.com/being-addie/714114582776610816/healthy-habits-im-developing-for-2023?source=share
So far, I've managed to do a lot and I'm so proud of myself. If you did some of them too, I'm really proud of you <3. It's difficult but we did it!
Here's what I managed to accomplish:
⭐Got my sleep schedule right: I FINALLY am sleeping 7-8 hours a night and it's so much better because I wake up at 5:30 am every morning and I'm more alert these days.
⭐Working out: Started going to the gym 5 days a week. I'm also looking into some hip-hop classes in the evenings.
⭐Water: I've tried drinking more water, and it's certainly working. I'm not perfect, but we're getting there!
⭐Digital detoxing: I did it. I successfully deleted social media and I'm so freaking proud of myself. It's 100% not easy and while I do get the occasional bursts of jealousy and FOMO, I'm getting better <3
⭐Creative work: I've started to learn how to crochet, and I'm planning on starting knitting soon. I also want to begin making my own jewellery (possibly try my hand at making clothes as well)
⭐Portfolio: I've begun work on my portfolio and I'm really excited with all the ideas I'm getting.
⭐Clean room: My room is so much cleaner now that I'm tidying up on a regular basis.
⭐Friendships: Currently in a really great place with two separate friend groups who value me, and I'm really grateful to past me for cutting out people I thought were my "friends".
Of course, I'm not perfect, I will be struggling with some things. I did particularly have problems with some of these:
💛My to-do list: More often than not, my to-do list lies incomplete because I just don't want to do it lol. Discipline is key, and I'm working on it.
💛Food: I've had to go out so much, and I've been consuming less-than-ideal healthy food. It's been difficult because I'm out so many hours due to classes that I literally need to buy those sugary protein bars to eat. 10 hours a day of nonstop commuting, sitting for 2-hour classes is no joke. We've also had a ton of birthdays and outings so I'm trying not to give into temptation and buy a bag of chips on a whim.
💛Self-care: I was so busy, I burned out, oof. I overworked myself to the point of a mental breakdown, and I'm still so busy, I'm finding it difficult to set aside time to even do my Everything Shower. I'm going to try and cut my day into manageable chunks so I can decompress.
Learning myself over the last few months has been interesting, to say the least. Paying attention to your mind and body's cues allows you to be more aware of what you're doing and WHY. Here's your sign to start implementing habits you've been sleeping on.
Don't wait, just start. xoxo
<3
#self care#self improvement#self love#level up#level up journey#self love journey#glow up#college#tips and tricks#it girl#that girl#perfect#life#routine#self development#personal development#self growth#wellness#leveling up#level up tips#leveling up tips#leveling up journey#dream girl journey#dream girl#habits#progress
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Do you have any advice for drawing backgrounds? I want to start drawing them more but they intimate me and perspective seems really difficult
I can try! I kinda suck at givin advice, but here we go
When drawin backgrounds, you almost wanna think of them as their own characters with the details you add n put into them. Rooms n homes are the best ways to express this bcuz you can add details like decor that represents those who live there n shit. You can draw the wear n tear on things, the aging, etc. Of course, a lot homes aren't gonna be as maximalist as I like to draw lol but that doesn't mean they don't have their own charm. Even when it comes to drawin the outside, there's so many little details that make the whole piece. Even a vast open desert has rocks, cracks, heat waves n alla that. Now that's just talkin about details, if perspective is what you need to work on, there's a few exersizes for that I guess.
You wanna focus on depth. Now not every scene has to have a lot bcuz sometimes that's just not the perspective or location, but depth is kinda important. Think of what's in the foreground (closest), middle ground, and the WAY way background. The two best ways to really capture this depth can be 1) Forest/nature scenes, and 2) Lookin through a window.
Practice by drawin the things you see. Like wherever you're sittin, draw your perspective from right there (includin things close to you in the foreground). This can help gain a better understanding of shots n scenes in different locations n understandin the perspective. These drawings don't have to be the most beautiful thing, just take in the depth n perspective. Take a very impressionistic style if you wanna.
I think the best advice I can give ya is to REALLY take in your surroundings. Every now n then, just take a moment to take in all of the little details in a room, in public, outside, on transit, etc. Look for the things that everyone sees but it's such commonplace that no one really notices. The beauty of backgrounds is that they can say a lot about a character, a places history, etc. Backgrounds tell their own mfin story.
But yeah, perspective can be kinda tricky, so imma go back to those two depth practices I recommended. Gonna do some quick lil shitty sketches to show you what I mean on like gettin that shit in. (Sorry for the crumply paper, my cat sat his wet ass on it). These are just to get an idea of what the practices can look like! They're not te end all be all. Spend as much or as little time as you want. It's all about learnin, man
I don't know how helpful this was. Sorry about that, dude. The best advice I can give is to just keep practicin. Everythin seems intimidating at first. Ya just gotta take the stride forward and keep tryin. It doesn't matter where you are with backgrounds now, bcuz with an effort made you'll see improvement each n every time. I've seen some of your stuff, man, I know you got this shit. Good luck!
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this might be an unpopular opinion but actually i think that in homecoming mcu peter was very well characterized? i thought he brought the sass and was very headstrong and i think that's why that film is my favorite out of his, he was throwing himself into situations without deliberation with just a very restless and agitated feel to him at points, and actively driving the plot forward in a way that to me felt very baby peter. i think that fanon (like irondad, woobifying him in fics etc) has contributed to a perception of him that isn't super strong in actual canon. i also think the writers would benefit from reading your tags on that post lol, cause mcu spidey is at his best when HIS choices are actively driving the plot, and at its weakest when hes reacting to things happening to him like in far from home. there's potential for spidey 4, there's a lot of room for angry, broken, but hopeful peter, and i'm sure the mcu will disappoint me but i am a fool and live in hope :')
i guess you have some kind of a point there, and i can see the point you're making - but – i think where it doesn't work is that we never actually get an inkling as to why peter's restless and agitated. why he cares so much about being a hero. why he wants to. when like, in civil war he actually kind of didn't want to get involved with the avengers. he was blackmailed into it. so why that 180?
no consistency in the mcu. no consistency at all. i hear that writers don't even consult each other between movies, and i believe it ,, considering how much whiplash i consistently get from mcu character motivations. (constantly thinking of civil war where hawkeye tells scott "you might go to jail for this", and scott says "yeah well what else is new" nonchalantly, like he didn't just fucking have an entire movie where is whole motivation was "i do not want to go to jail because i want to be with my daughter." what the fuck?? what the fuck mcu??? what the fuck?????????? the mcu does this with literally every character too. tony destroying all his armor in one movie and the next one making ARMOR FOR THE WORLD??????????????? 180s just across the board. we're gonna do a thing and then 3 seconds later we're gonna do the exact opposite thing. i hate the mcu.)
in the comics we entirely understand why peter is agitated and restless. we've seen it. we see his justification literally on the front page of his first appearance in amazing fantasy #15.
the world mocked timid teenager peter parker. so peter wants the world to see the awesome might of spider-man. there you go. that's why he put on the stupid tights. we get it. two sentences and we get the whole schtick.
we pointedly do NOT get to see what kind of kid mcu peter parker was before the spider-bite. we never get to know. we do not know what changed. he doesn't even talk about it. not even freaking once. he never laments that he used to be weak. he never expresses the sentiment that his life has improved now that he has powers, or even what having powers really means to him. just a "i've got powers now. guess i have to become a hero. i guess." there's no motivation for him at ALL. power doesn't mean a thing to him. he's just some kid who has powers i guess and who else is kind of super? uh? tony stark?? yeah okay i wanna be tony stark i guess.
IT ALL MEAAAANS nothing!! ! ! ! ! ! nothing fucking at all!!!!!! it's actually SO SO missing the point of spider-man entirely to not pay any mention at all to who peter parker was before the spider-bite. that lives in him every day. it's an ANXIETY that lives in him every day of his life. it's something really important for you to know about peter. in every issue spider-man is IN, this anxiety manifests in some kind of way, in everything he does.
we never see what's changed for him, how it affects his dynamic with his friends, with aunt may, with anyone. it's barely a source of tension for him because actually, his secret identity is thrown around like it's a joke. it baffles my mind how much the mcu misses the mark with spider-man, actually. whenever i think about mcu spider-man i discover some new way they misunderstood spider-man. i didn't even think about how much is missing from just the omission of pre-spider-bite peter parker. it's such a vital part of spider-man's motivation that's been wiped. his motivation in the mcu is so, so vague. his motivation is the same as any kid who has seen an iron man movie. "hey that guy can fly. i want to fly too. and i want to buy iron man action figures and i want a cool suit too." uhh?? yeah?? what kid doesn't?? lame. lame and weak. mcu peter parker doesn't have a unique personality trait to differentiate him from any 10 year old who's watching these movies. weak and lame.
#sci speaks#sorry i wanted to be more on your team anon because your ask is sweet and optimistic and i wanna be sweet and optimistic too#but every time my brain gears start churning over the mcu i find new ways to hate it#sci talks movies
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SILVER SPRINGS (Lo'ak x Fem! Reader)
pairing: lo'ak x fem! reader
wordcount: 7.6k
warnings: angst, fandom cliches, amateur writing, bantering, unrequited love (?), complex family dynamics, A LOT OF CLICHES IM SORRY, bad pacing (my bad bro idk how to pace a story im new to this), not sure what else as this is pretty tame
rating: SFW! though my blog is 18+ because i interact with nsfw content, anyone can technically read this?
taglist: @teyamsatan
author's note: okay hi this is my first fanfic that i've ever written before? not counting fanfics i wrote in middle school anyway i got the idea for this fanfic after listening to silver springs by fleetwood mac and i was so obsessed with this idea that i had to make it come true? im a huge neteyam girly so this is a shocker that my first fic ever is about lo'ak (he's my babygirl, just not the LOML like neteyam). uhhh im only familiar with academic writing and this is my first time EVER dipping my toe into the waters of creative writing so pls bear with me if this is not perfect. i actually think this is quite flat and tbh i hate the pacing like its actually awful and there is so much room for improvement, but hey what can i do? IM A NEWBIE AT THIS!! with that being said, if you do decide to read, please treat me with some grace because i am sensitive and i did this purely for fun!!! i know my lo'ak stans are starving for fics and im here to deliver!!!! i am not a professional or seasoned writer by any means but i really tried my best to create something enjoyable ): i don't know why this ended up being so long but it did and there WILL be a part two, i already have it outlined. SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, here is my first avatar fanfiction!!
proofread and edited but i got lazy toward the end LOL if you see any mistakes, please tell me kindly <3
You could be my silver spring
Blue-green colors flashin'
I would be your only dream
Your shinin' autumn ocean crashin'
The forest blended into a mixture of vibrant colors as you ran away from the incoming threat. Beautiful shades of blue, green, and purple passed around you. The feeling of the bare ground, soft and pliant from the morning dew, normally imbued you with a sense of stability and peace. As long as your feet were on the ground and connected to Ewya’s bountiful moon, you knew everything would be alright. However, this time, the feeling of the bare ground underneath your feet felt the opposite of stable and peaceful. The ground served as a reminder of how much longer you had to run until you reached the safe confines of the Omitikaya clan.
You stopped running with a quick halt. Your chest heaved up and down as you tried to catch your breath. The beads in your hair clacked together in a cacophony as you looked around in different directions. The sun broke through the tree canopy and highlighted the forest like a kaleidoscope. Swish. You quickly turned your head to the other side to catch sight of what made the noise but all you could see was the rustling of the bush–as if whatever you were looking for was looking for you too before running off. Without a second to spare, you dashed in the direction of the village. But you only made it a few feet ahead of you before you were tackled by something heavy and shoved to the forest ground.
“I win.” said the voice from above in a triumphant, but annoying, manner.
“You got to be faster than that, ‘eylan.” As you shaded your eyes with your hand, you were met with the illuminating picture of Lo’ak on top of you. The sun shone above on Lo’ak and cast him in beautiful rays of light. He looked like an angel–like a celestial being sent straight from Ewya’s heart and into your eyesight. Though you have never seen an angel, Norm described them as ethereal and pure religious beings. And at this moment, Lo’ak was an angel.
“Get off me, fatass.” You said as you pushed Lo’ak weight off your body. You secretly loved the weight of his body on yours and how it radiated a warmth that hugged your body and soul. Lo’ak rolled off with ease and laid next to you on the foliage. “Hey! No need to insult me because you lost yet another round of hunter and prey.”
Hunter and prey. A game that all Omitcayan children played growing up. And though you and Lo’ak were no longer children, you continued to play this game. Lo’ak claims it’s a great way to burn energy and let loose. You suspected he liked playing so often because it allowed him to avoid whatever daily chores his father, the Olo’eyktan, assigned him. And while you could think of better ways to spend your time, you indulged in Lo’ak’s childish whims because it brought him happiness. What type of best friend would you be if you didn’t?
“I’m not insulting you because I lost. I could care less about losing,” You explained. “I’m insulting you because tackled me to the ground and put your entire weight on my body. Lay off the yovo fruit and I might insult you less.”
Lo’ak scoffed at your response and stuck his tongue out in a mocking manner. “You mean the yovo fruit that Spider and I specifically collected because you asked for it? Yeah, I got put on ikran pen duty for a week after that since we missed curfew.”
You simply rolled your eyes and aimed your middle finger at Lo’ak. Yeah, you definitely spent way too much time around Lo’ak.
You both basked in the sun and listened to the sound of the forest: your home, your comfort place, the lifeline of the People. You thanked Eywa every day for the forest and the way it provided for you endlessly–from the delicious yovo fruit, to the medicinal herbs, fauna, and everything in between. There was a gentle rustle in the air as it approached low afternoon. If closed your eyes and listened hard enough, you could hear the faint buzz of the insects and the leaves fluttering.
As you turned on your side to face Lo’ak, you noticed he still had his eyes shut. Your eyes raked over his stripes–the stripes that would forever be engrained in your brain–and focused on the armband that fits snugly on his upper arm. The weaved armband was made out of dried, violet stalks from the tstxa'a plant and braided into a traditional, intricate Omatikayan pattern. You added tiny clay beads that you hand-molded and painted a color very similar to a marigold–you captured copious amounts of juice from the banana fruit just to have enough pigment to create a dye. A small smile appeared on your face as you recall how long it took you to make the armband.
Your eyes slowly made their way toward his face. They widened as they realized Lo’ak’s eyes were open and staring at you too. The air was charged with tension as you both continued to stare at each other in silence.
You and Lo’ak always had this weird ability to communicate through eye contact alone. Your friendship, which was forged in childhood, ran so deep that words failed to represent what your eyes could. He was your other half as much as you were his. In these small moments of intimacy, you remember just how much you love Lo’ak. There was an unspoken bond between you two–a bond that went beyond friendship and teetered on the edge of romantic love. And while it was undeniable that there was something more happening between the two of you, your relationship stayed on that flimsy edge.
“What are you thinking about,” you whispered in a tone so soft that it reached Lo’ak ears like a tender caress.
“Oh, nothing. Just thinking,” Lo’ak replied with a teasing lilt in his voice and a glitter in his amber eyes. While everyone in the Omatikaya clan had the same shades of bright, yellow eyes, you thought Lo’ak had the prettiest. You raised the muscle on your face, where your eyebrows would have been if you had, and furrowed your forehead in suspicious knowing.
“Thinki-” “I’m thinking about how funny it would be if I beat your ass in another round of hunter and prey! Last one to the village has to take over foraging duty!,” Lo’ak shouted with a boyish smile as he got up quickly and ran in the direction of his kelku.
You got up from the lush grass and ran after him with another exacerbated breath.
The day drawled along as you patrolled the forest for the dandetiger tree. You looked for its long, azure leaves and armored trunk. As a healer in training, you were tasked by Mo’at to look for the tree for samples of the resin-like substance that it leaked. The sticky substance was extremely helpful to the Omatikaya clan in many ways as it behaved like an adhesive. It was especially important to healers as they used the dangetiger tree as part of treating wounds and ensuring bandages stuck and protected healing wounds. The healing hut ran low on its supply, thus you found yourself wandering through the forest. Kiri offered to accompany you, but you could tell she rather focus on perfecting the paste she was mixing. A major perk of being best friends with Lo’ak is that you also became close with his family and found a small niche within the Sully family.
You were an extension of Lo’ak, but also the opposite of him in some ways. Whereas Lo’ak was more energetic and impulsive, you were calmer and sensical. You both balanced each other perfectly; you were the yin to his yang. While Lo’ak’s nature often got him in trouble with his family, namely his father and older brother, you loved his high energy and zest for life. Sure, he could use more pragmatism in his daily thinking, but you saw Lo’ak’s personality as a blessing more than a hindrance, especially in times of war and destruction. If Lo’ak was your sun, then you were his moon–stable and outer-worldly. You were unwavering. Your nurturing nature and kind soul always amazed Lo’ak, even in the worse of times, you took it upon yourself to think and act as an optimist. You carried yourself with a sense of dignity that Lo’ak wishes he could replicate.
Though none of you ever admitted it out loud, you and Lo’ak knew that you loved each other in a way that best friends didn’t.
Despite your differences, you both had a passion for exploring and adventure. If Lo’ak went anywhere, you followed. And if he got in any trouble, you were only a few steps behind him. While Lo’ak intention for mischief was partially caused by the motivation to piss off his father, you believed that Eywa made Pandora for the purpose of exploring. Why would she make Pandora so magnificent and rich in life if not to experience every single crevice, nook, and cranny of it? While the forest would always be your home and the place you want to spend the rest of your life in, you could not deny the appeal of a nomadic lifestyle like the Olangi clan. However, with the return of the sky people on Pandora, your exploring had been cut to a short. Unable to venture into the unknown parts of the forest, the parts that resulted in a scolding or two from both your mom and Mr. Sully, you were forced to stay within the clan’s boundary lines.
Your thoughts were cut short as your heard movement in the background. The bag on your shoulder was discarded to the ground as you took out your bow and arrow. You were no warrior, but you begged Lo’ak to teach you enough to be able to defend yourself. Any Na’vi should know this little. You prayed to Eywa that it wasn’t a palulukan, or worse—a sky demon. A bead of sweat rolled down the side of your face as you aimed your bow in the direction of where you heard the noise. You aimed at the bushes before letting your final finger release the bow.
“Relax, syulang! It’s just me, Lo’ak!,” he said as he came out from the bushes of loreyu and walked to where you were standing. “Lo’ak,” you huffed with annoyance in your voice. “Don’t scare me like that, you skxawng! I was really focused on finding a dandetiger tree. Tsahik’s orders. What are you even doing here? I thought you were training with your father.”
“Lo’ak,” you huffed with annoyance in your voice. “Don’t scare me like that, you skxawng! I was really focused on finding a dandetiger tree. Tsahik’s orders. What are you even doing here? I thought you were training with your father.”
As Lo’ak walked closer to you, you noticed the downturn expression on his face. Your immediate heart softened. He must have had another fight with his father, you thought to yourself. Lo’ak turned his face toward yours and you saw the unshed tears in his eyes that threatened to fall any second now.
“I, uh, I was training with my father until we got into a fight and I stormed off,” he said with a shaky breath. You could tell Lo’ak was trying to keep his composure, not wanting to show that vulnerable side he desperately tries to hide away. Yet, you knew better than that. Every time Lo’ak tried to shut down and hide his emotions, you came running after him and knocked down the fragile walls he built around himself. The walls were fragile because Lo’ak knew he would and could never shut you out completely. He took a deep, shaky breath before continuing, “I’m just so sick of it. He expects me to be this perfect son and soldier all in one, but I’m not Neteyam. I’m just Lo’ak.”
You always thought Lo’ak was the most complex person you ever met. He was the second-born son of the revered Toruk Makto and mighty Palulukun Makto. But, Lo’ak was so much more than that to you. He was more than both of his parents. Though he would never admit it, Lo’ak was a lost soul. Not quite like Neteyam, the mighty warrior and dutiful son, or the spiritual Kiri who was literally like Ewya’s disciple. Hell, even everyone knew Tuk would grow into a fine, strong-spirited woman! Lo’ak didn't know where he fit in his family. Of course, the Sully family loved him, and Lo’ak loved his family just as much. But that still didn’t stop the gnawing, deep feeling in Lo’ak’s subconscious from telling him that he would never amount to greatness like the rest of his family. You wished Lo’ak wouldn’t be so hard on himself because you also had a deep feeling in your subconscious that Lo’ak was destined for greatness–the feeling was embedded so deep in your bones that you would bet your left on it.
“I know that I’m a fuck up.”
“You’re no-”
“It’s okay, syulang. I know I’m a fuck up. I can see it in the tribes’ faces every time they hear my father lecture me, or worse, hear Neteyam lecture me. I can see it in my fathers’ eyes and in the way the rest of my family pities me.”
“Your family doesn’t pity you, Lo’ak. If anything, they pity the way your father has been forced into this weird dichotomy of the punisher and protector ever since the sky demons returned and how it’s taken an effect on your relationship,” you tried to explain as sweetly as possible.
You took a step closer to Lo’ak and examined his face. Though his tears had dried and his eyes were now puffy, you could still tell there was a great sadness within him. You wished you could take all his pain and suffering so he didn’t have to.
“I don’t know who I am besides the fuck up, or the troublemaker. I feel like my entire existence is defined by all the things I am not. Defined by the way I’m different from Neteyam or Kiri. I want to be defined by who I am, but I don’t even know who that is most of the time,” said Lo’ak. “I try so hard, but it is never enough to satisfy my father. Or myself. I feel this heavy pressure in my chest and no matter what I do to relieve it, it stays. If I am not meant to be the next Olo’eyktan or the next Tsahik, then who am I meant to be? Sure–I am training to become a warrior, but I’m not sure if this is something I want or if it is a role I am forced into. I know I’m impulsive and reckless and irresponsible, but I try so hard, but what if that isn’t enough to look over all my flaws and mistakes?”
You moved even closer and tucked one of Lo’ak’s front braids behind his ear. You always loved his hair like this. It suited his face so well. His braids were adorned by various beads, each with its own significance and memory attached to them. The beads he wore today were a pretty amethyst color. Your mind quickly flashbacked to the day you both created the matching beads. You both swam all day in one of the forest’s ponds trying to find the purple stones underwater so you could both craft new beads. Lo’ak almost passed out from lack of air twice and your hair was so tangled by the end of the day that it took your mother three hours to undo the gnarly knots. It was totally worth it, however, because you gained new accessories and memories to match. But before you could let yourself get too far away in the past, you shifted your attention towards Lo’ak and began to speak.
“I see you, Lo’ak. I see all of you. I know that you feel like a lost soul and that you get too caught up in comparing yourself to the rest of your family. And I truly wished you didn’t compare yourself to others so much because you are so special.” Lo’ak’s face grew warm at your words. Before he could respond, you interrupted him and continued to talk. “You feel like you are too different from your family and think you do not fit in, but you do! You are the light of your family; you bring laughter and happiness. The Sully dynamic would not be the same without you–it would be too serious and no one would have fun! Lo’ak, you have a strong heart like your father. Even though you could use some impulse control, I know you never have ill intentions. We are still so young and have so much more maturing to do. Do not let yourself be defined by the mistakes of your past. Mistakes are bound to happen–they are as natural as birth and death. You’re the light of my life too. Without you, there is no one else in this clan that could make me smile as much as you do. No one to explore with and quench our thirst for curiosity. You say that you are impulsive, but there is too much excitement in your body to contain it. I love seeing your excitement and wander–it is a reminder of Pandora’s goodness and the way Eywa intended us to live. You are not irresponsible, you are just learning along the way like we all are. There is no one like you, and my heart is torn because you do not see yourself in the same way. I pray to Eywa that you could see yourself through my eyes.” You then placed one hand on Lo’ak’s chest, right above his heart.
“Nga yawne lu oer, Lo’ak.” There was no going back now. You said it–the words that would either be fatal to your soul or make your heart sore higher than the Hallejuah Mountains. And though there was a risk of Lo’ak rejecting you completely, you jumped off the fragile cliff that your friendship lived on. All the intimate moments, the knowing smiles, and the lifetime of shared memories led you to this moment.
A moment of silent pass as you waited for Lo’ak’s response to your confession. Lo'ak did not expect you to confess, but he knew at some point it was bound to happen. Just not right now, under these cruel circumstances, in a time of devastation.
You shouldn’t have confessed. Lo’ak wasn’t ready for it.
The look in your eyes was so sincere and so full of unconditional love. You are the only person who could truly see Lo’ak for everything that he is and everything he was meant to become. The light hit your eyes in the right way and Lo’ak could swear they were glittering. Ewya blessed her with both heart and beauty, he said in his head. Lo’ak could only stare as he still reeled from your heartfelt speech. He wasn’t an idiot—Lo’ak knew that there was a special chemistry between him and his best friend. And he also knew that it was the type of chemistry that only two people in love have. Lo’ak has known ever since he was a small child that you were his endgame. Your years spent together only solidified his hypothesis.
Life on Pandora could be unforgiving and unrelenting, but you were the complete opposite. You were forgiving, always ready to accept Lo’ak back into your arms and heart after every mistake he made. Though these mistakes were rarely made towards you, you still welcomed him every time. You were always there for him. But, Lo’ak didn’t fall in love with you because of the fact you were always there for him. It did play a big part, but Lo’ak knew that would be a selfish reason for falling in love. Instead, Lo’ak fell in love with you because you were…well, you. You were kind and always treated your fellow clan members with the utmost consideration and respect. You were perceptive, never wanting to misconstrue a situation and analyzing all nuances before speaking on something. Because of this, everything you said or did was genuine. Lo’ak loved this the most about you. Where Lo’ak felt everyone in the clan (excluding his family and Spider) give him fake niceties, you were 100% authentic towards him. You never condescendingly spoke to him or treated him like a chore that had to be put up with. Compassion and understanding were what you treated Lo’ak with. These are all things he rarely experienced with other Na’vi. Yet, you also weren’t afraid to call out Lo’ak on his bullshit and humble him. You somehow balanced outspokenness and tenderness all at once. This lit a fire in Lo’ak soul.
This thought both excited and scared him. The thought of loving someone unconditionally, and being loved unconditionally, seemed like something too good to be true. Only something reserved for people who deserved it. Lo’ak knew you deserved unconditional love, but it couldn’t be with him. Despite everything you said about him and the way it almost glued together his broken self-esteem, Lo’ak could not return your confession in good consciousness. It’s not that Lo’ak didn't love you–hell, he loves you more than anyone or anything on this moon! But, his insecurities would not allow you to love him or allow him to love you. He didn’t deserve to love or be loved, not when his insecurities kept up awake at night, taunting his brain with “You’ll never be good enough” or “You’re a failure of a son and brother.” You deserved better than Lo’ak and all of his broken parts. You needed someone who was the best–someone like Neteyam, but not Neteyam himself because that would be the final nail in Lo’ak’s coffin. Lo’ak knows his recklessness, impulsivity, and natural gravitation toward the unknown was acceptable because he is young. These may be the traits you love about Lo’ak now, but he knows very well these are the same traits that can make you fall out of love with him too. After all, you won’t be young forever and it won’t be cute forever. But what if he never grows out of this? What if this is who he is meant to be? No, Lo’ak would not subject you to this fate.
And so, for once in his life, Lo’ak let fear take over his decision. Your face morphed into an expression of shock and confusion before settling on a still face.
“I am sorry, syulang. I can’t do this right now.”
You watched Lo’ak retreat from the spot you both stood in. What the fuck just happened?
You spent the next few days in a strange haze as you processed what happened between you and Lo’ak. At first, you were angry. How could Lo’ak just leave you hanging like that? For Ewya’s sake, he could have said anything else and it would have been a better response than what he said. You laid your fucking heart out on your sleeve, waiting for Lo’ak to take it and claim it forever. After your initial response to the situation, you started to worry. Maybe you misinterpreted your relationship. What if Lo’ak didn’t love you and you just thought he did because of how close you were? No, that didn’t sound right. You knew Lo’ak loved you too. Not even in a delusional way to comfort yourself, but there was no denying you both loved each other. Did you just confess at the wrong time? Perhaps it would have been better if you confessed when Lo’ak wasn’t fighting with his father. But, you didn’t even mean to confess! Well, you did mean to confess but not at that exact moment. You were trying to comfort Lo’ak and reassure him that he was wrong, that someone could love him. It just seemed like the right thing to say. What if it wasn’t? What if it overwhelmed Lo’ak and pushed him away? Now you felt like the jerk for confessing at such a moment. But Lo’ak was a jerk too for just leaving you! You really wished you could talk to him, or that he would talk to you, but the timing was horrible. The war party went out a few days ago, and it was Lo’ak’s first time joining the mission. But of course, things never go as planned. Over-enthusiasm from Lo’ak’s and an injured Neteyam caused Mr. Sully to put Lo’ak on lockdown for the last few days. This was the first day Lo’ak was allowed some freedom to explore, that’s what Kiri told you before she left with her brother, Spider, and Tuk. You wanted to join them in their adventure today, but you were still reeling from your last conversation with Lo’ak and decided it would be better to stay in the village. You needed one more day to unscramble your thoughts before approaching him.
The tension between you and Lo’ak had been festering, but it quickly came to a stop once you saw him walk back into the village with his entire family. Jake and Neytiri walked walk in front of their children with heavy looks on their faces. Jake looked angry, yet worn at the same time. His mouth was pressed in a tight line and the wrinkles in his forehead looked more apparent than they ever have before. Neytiri walked beside Jake with Tuk’s hand in hers in a tight grasp, as if she never wanted to let her baby go ever again. Her expression was harder to read, but you could tell the tsakarem was worried by her stiff posture. Kiri trailed behind her parents with a slouchy form and arms across her torso. She looks dejected. And finally in the back were Neteyam and Lo’ak. Spider was nowhere to be seen, which you found odd as he went with the rest of the Sully children into the forest, but you assumed he must have gone back to the human outpost before curfew.
I wonder what happened. Something must have happened if the entire family walked in like that.
Jake and Neytiri quickly made their way to their kelku and closed the opening flaps before any of their children could come in. The Sully children then made their way toward the side of their kelku and leaned forward on their hands as they attempted to listen to their parent's conversation. You wanted to make your way towards them and figure out what the hell happened. Just as you were about to walk over to them, Lo’ak turned around and his eyes scanned the village as if he were looking for something or someone. Lo’ak’s eyes then met yours and with a small nod, you understood what he was trying to say. Later. At our spot.
Your stomach turned to bubbles as a feeling of cold anxiety washed over your body. You weren’t sure if it was because of Lo’ak or something else, but you knew whatever it was, it was not good.
Lo’ak was already sitting on the bioluminescent forest floor when you arrived at the small clearing which was designated as our spot. It was a hidden clearing–away from any of the main trails and hunting and gathering spots that the clan used. You first found the clearing one day after playing a round of hunter and prey with Lo’ak and Spider.
Flashback
You were both 12 years old. Your hair was cut in a sharp, shoulder-length bob because you claimed long hair only got in the way. A bright orange and yellow ombre feather decorated the underside of your hair. A simple beige-toned weaved top and matching ‘tewng adorned your small body as you ran away from Lo’ak. He loved playing the role of hunter–you assumed it because of the way Lo’ak looked up to his father. He wanted to be like the Olo’eyktan in every way possible. This was before their relationship had a strain in it. Both you and Lo’ak were unmarred from the harshness of war. The only thought that filled both of your minds was what adventure you would get into next.
As you giggled profusely and thought of where to run next, you noticed that you were in a different part of the forest that you never visited before. You searched for any familiar landmarks, or plants that would signify where you were. The giggles that previously escaped your mouth quieted down as the situation dawned on you. You were lost in the forest all alone! Your mom was going to kill you, but only if a nantang or palulukun didn’t kill you first.
“Lo’ak, are you there!!!!!,” you screamed at the top of your lungs. That probably wasn’t the smartest move. A predator could be attracted to your sound. But you figured it would be better to call for Lo’ak. If any predators came, you could climb a tree and wait it out.
“Lo’ak!!!” you continued. Worry was starting to creep in. If you didn’t find Lo’ak soon, there was no way you would be able to survive the night in the forest.
As you looked around the clearing again, you noted that it was quite pretty. A small pond, decorated with pink paysyuls, sat in the middle of the forest. The sun streamed through the trees and you could see the fishes elegantly swim in the water. A pack of loreyu sat directly across the pond, along with eanean bushes right next to it. The clearing was simple, but you knew that it was much more than that. Like everything else Eywa created, the clearing served a purpose and was spiritually connected to the Na’vi. Perhaps its purpose was unknown until this moment. You decided that the purpose of the clearing would be a secret spot only known to both you and Lo’ak. The thought excited you, and you quickly imagined a lifetime of moments here.
Flashback Over
Lo’ak sat with his arms extended behind him with his back facing you. You could see the tension in his back muscle as he sat there, looking up towards the night sky. One of Polyphemus’ moons was shaped like an ikran claw. Despite the moon’s brightness in the sky, the stars still twinkled. A soft, minty green glow emitted from the bioluminescent leaves Lo’ak sat upon. His tanhi, patterned perfectly on his body like Ewya directly hand placed each freckle herself, glowed like the sky above him. Lo’ak was lost in his thoughts as he silently spoke to Ewya, questioning what her intention was. You cleared your throat to grab Lo’ak’s attention.
“Hey…” he muttered under his breath. You replied with a soft hello before taking your place next to him. There was still an awkward tension lingering between the two of you, but you pushed it away. Whatever happened a few days ago didn’t matter anymore. You knew something serious happened in the Sully family and you knew your best friend needed you right now.
“Do you want to tell me what happened this time?” you quoted Lo’ak as you looked into his eyes for the first time in a few days. The dark lighting only enhanced the rich shade of his honey-colored eyes. They glowed brightly in the dark. His eyes resembled the shiny topaz glass jewels located deep in the rainforests’ many caverns–both were a sight to behold.
Lo’ak thought he should rip the bandage off. There was no point in delaying the traumatic news he just received from his parents.
“My family and I are leaving the forest.”
You were confused by his statement. Leaving where? There was no other place to go. The forest was your home, his home. “Do you mean that you’re visiting another tribe for diplomatic reasons,” you asked with a slight tilt in your head to match confusion. Why would this be so important that he needed to meet you at your spot? This wouldn’t be the first time the Sully family has left on diplomatic retreats.
“No, (Y/N). My family and I are leaving the forest permanently,” Lo’ak replied. Your heart dropped into the pits of your stomach. Now you were just getting annoyed. You haven’t spoken to Lo’ak in the days, and the first thing he does is try to pull at your leg. “Lo’ak if this is a joke, then it’s not funny. What are you talking about?” you said with a stern voice. Lo’ak stared at you as if he didn’t want to explain further. It’s true, he didn’t want to explain further because it meant that what was happening was real and there was no way to delay or stop the situation.
“Earlier today, when we were exploring the forest, we saw footprints in the dirt that didn’t belong to any Na’vi. It was sky demons. We followed the footsteps to an abandoned shack. I knew we weren’t supposed to be there, but then we spotted a group of uniltìranyu in military gear. I quickly paged my father and let him know what we found. But as we were trying to leave back to the forest, the uniltìranyu captured us and held us hostage…”
“What?” you let out in shock. The magnitude of Lo’ak’s words hit you like a poisoned arrow. Dreamwalkers? How could that be true? The last dream walker to walk the ground of Pandora was Jake Sully…and that was 14 years ago.
“I-I thought we were going to die. They treated us like we were animals. As if we were the ones who invaded their planet and deserved to be captured and hung. All I felt was primal fear and the instinctual reaction to protect my family. We were held hostage until my parents and brother came to our rescue. But, it was too late by then. They figured out who were and our relation to my father. They even captured Spider…” Lo’ak had to stop speaking. The familiar tightening of his throat began. You could tell he was about to cry, but you pushed further. Honestly, your brain was fuzzy at this point. It was so fuzzy to the point that you didn’t even process the news of Spider, your tiny human friend, being captured. It completely slipped your mind. You didn’t have time to think about the implications of this news as you could only process one thing and one thing only: Lo’ak was leaving. The Sullys were leaving!
“What does that have to do with you leaving the forest?”
“Don’t you understand, syulang? They know who we are. Our lives are at risk! The whole clan is at risk if we continue to stay.” Lo’ak explained in frustration. “I don’t want this, I don’t want to leave the only place I’ve ever known. How can I leave the forest while Spider is out there, going through Eywa knows what, with those demons? How can I leave you?” Fat, wet tears streamed down Lo’ak’s face as he spoke.
Crack. The sound of your heart breaking reverberated in your ears. All you could hear was a dull ringing. Your best friend, the love of your life–how could he just leave like that? You questioned the will of Eywa. How could she be so cruel to tear you both apart? Especially after your confession the other day? You wanted to curse and scream and cry all at once. However, you knew you had to be strong for Lo’ak.
You held Lo’ak’s body in silence. You were both in a catatonic state. An hour or so had passed since his initial confession. The atmosphere was serene, a heavy contrast from the dark storm brewing in both of your minds. This may be the last time you would ever get to hold Lo’ak like this and fully enjoy his presence. All of the years spent together slowly meshed in your mind as you tried to calm yourself down with memories of happier times. You honestly didn’t know how you could survive this life without your other half.
Lo’ak wasn’t faring any better than you. His continuous sniffles vibrated on your body. He barely looked up, wanting to savor the feeling of your bodies pressed together in such an intimate way. His mind was in a haze as he processed the situation. This wasn’t real life, it couldn’t be real life. His life was perfectly balanced with you. If Eywa sought to protect the balance of life, why would she take you away from him? Why would she take away Spider?
Tomorrow is never promised. That is a cruel lesson you learned today. It was probably best that you and Lo’ak head back to the village and sleep, but you didn’t want this night to end. You wanted to savor every last moment. Memorize every stripe on Lo’ak’s body, every green speck in his eyes, the way his eyebrows moved, and how his body felt right next to yours. How could you say goodbye to 14 years of memories in one night? It seemed impossible.
As you stared at the light reflecting off the pond, you knew there was one topic you had to broach. You weren’t sure if this was the right time, but it was the only chance you had. After all, Lo’ak only had one more day in the clan before his family set off to Eywa knows where. You knew the forest of Pandora held many clans, but you suspected his family would be going somewhere even further than that. You tried to calm the rapid pace of your heart, but your nerves refused to settle down. So, you sent a quick prayer to Ewya, turned to Lo’ak, and quietly said, “The other night, when I said I love you, why didn’t you say it back?”
You didn’t want to fight with Lo’ak–not on a night like this, where blood has been shed and a family has been torn from normalcy. But, you had to talk to Lo’ak about this. What if you never saw him again? You couldn’t live the rest of your life with unresolved feelings. It would drive you utterly insane and wreck your soul for as long as you live.
(Y/N)...”
“I’m being serious, Lo’ak. Why did not you say it back? I know this is the last thing on your mind right now, but you cannot leave me hanging. You owe me more than that and you know it,” you said with determination in your voice.
You then stood up. This was not a conversation you could have sitting down. The anxiety coursing through your veins made it impossible to sit still. Lo’ak followed your actions and stood up too.
“I was afraid,” he replied.
“Afraid of what Lo’ak? We have always been so honest with each other.” You thought you would always understand Lo’ak, but perhaps you were mistaken. You didn’t understand what there was to be afraid of. You both loved each other, shouldn’t that be enough? You failed to realize that love isn’t enough sometimes. There are forces beyond your control that make love unsustainable and out of your reach, despite how close you are to it. Eywa did not teach you this lesson. Lo’ak did.
Lo’ak was faced with two choices at this moment: he could confess his love to you or he could deny it. He so desperately wished he could choose the first choice. Something within him would not allow himself to whether it was because he was about to leave and he could not promise himself to you, or because he was so far deep in his inner turmoil. Lo’ak felt anger bubbling in his chest. This anger wasn’t directed towards you, but himself. He cursed his inability to allow himself to fully love you because of his internal issues. No, he justified the second choice in his mind with weak reasons as to why he could not confess his love.
If he said confessed, Lo’ak knew you would spend the rest of your days waiting for his return. If he ever returned. You deserved more than that. You deserved someone who could love you now. The prospect of you waiting for him, only for Lo’ak to stay the same Na’vi he was now, a version of himself that wasn’t proud of, haunted him. Yeah. Lo’ak framed his reasoning to focus on you, rather than himself because it made the harsh reality less painful. Damn the fact he was leaving, he would wait 100 years for you too if he confessed. The reality was Lo’ak could not confess his love because he couldn’t give his all to you, not when his judgment and self-worth were clouded by thoughts so dark that Eywa would be heartbroken to learn one of her children, whom she created with love and adoration, did not love himself.
Either way, he was about to break your heart for the second time within days.
“You are the other half of my soul and if there is any person who can understand me, it is you. But, I cannot love you. I’m sorry syulang.” There was a sorrowful look across Lo’ak’s face. Your body deflated at his words and the familiar sting of tears gathered in your eyes. He didn’t want to continue, but if was going to break your heart, you at least deserved a proper explanation.
“You are the most lovely and wonderful woman on this planet; the idea of you not being in my life hurts more than a palulukan attack. But I swear on my life to Eywa when I say this, but it is not you. It’s me. You have always been this positive being in my life, and I always hoped it would rub off on me and make me a better man. I thought, maybe if that ever happened, we could be together in the future. I would finally be worthy of all the love you have to offer. I am not good enough for you. I would only drag you down with the weight of my heavy problems,” Lo’ak finished.
“But it’s not your choice to decide who deserves me,” you let out with an exasperated tone. “How can you stand here in front of me and deny the bond we have? The love we have? The other day when I confessed that I see you and you ignored it, I brushed it off my shoulder because I was sure, with every fiber of my being, that you see me too. That you love me. But now you are leaving, and Eywa knows when the fuck you are coming back, and you can't even admit it out loud?” you questioned.
“Don’t you get it? I am not doing this because I want to deny the bond we have. I feel our bond every day from the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep. Even in my dreams, you are there. Your essence is built into the foundation of my bones. I just can’t love you. No good would come of it. I’m the clan’s outcast. Yes, we are best friends and we know each other like the back of our palms. But I won't let you carry the burden of my imperfectness,” Lo’ak choked with a sob at the end.
Without missing a beat, you tirade, “I think everything you are saying is complete bullshit. How could be absolute about something that has not been realized? We have spent the last 14 years together. I know you better than I know myself, Lo’ak. And I know you see me too, so what are you so afraid of? There is nothing that you could ever do that would scare me away from loving you. I love you for who you are–flaws and all. I notice everything about you, the good and the bad. I know you have feelings so big and nerve-wracking that you do not know how to handle them except by convincing yourself that they are true. But you cannot stand in my face and claim that this is for my own good. No, you are saying all this because you are too scared of the possibility that I might see through all that and decide that you are not worth the trouble, that every judgment the clan and your father says about you is right.”
You stepped a few feet away from Lo’ak and then turned towards the direction of the village. He hadn’t said a word since you finished your speech. Your entire back was facing Lo’ak until you turned your head over your shoulder to look back at him. The tears that pooled in your eyes began to flow like a sad waterfall that was dying, the tears slowly rolling down your stripped cheeks in an antagonizing matter. Your golden eyes stared into Lo’ak’s. He could see the hurt etched across your iris and he was sure his eyes looked just as pathetic and broken. It was a moment that would forever be engrained into Lo’ak’s memory. You opened your mouth and delivered the final blow to this already crestfallen night,
“Maybe I was wrong, maybe you don’t see me. Because if you truly did, you would know that I would not care about your weaknesses. I don’t even care about them now. I refuse to believe that you cannot love me too. You are a lot of things Lo’ak. A coward is not one of them. I’ll see you tomorrow to say goodbye.”
And at this moment, Lo’ak knew this was the biggest of all his fuck ups. He had managed to ruin a lot of good things and moments. Never knowing when the party is over and when the business began. When it came to you, his sweet tìyawn, Lo’ak never made any serious mistakes. So why was he doing it now? Lo’ak’s eyes burned as he stared at your figure walking away from him and the future you could’ve had together.
translations: eylan - friend, Olo’eyktan - male clan leader, tstxa'a - canalyd, kelku - home, palulukan - thanator, syulang - flower, loreyu - helocordian, skxawng - moron, Toruk Makto - toruk rider, Palulukun Makto - thanator rider, Tsahik - clan spiritual leader, Nga yawne lu oer - i love you, tsakarem - successor to the tsahik, ‘tewng - loincloth, nantang - viperwolf, paysyuls - water lily, eanean - blue plant, tanhi - bioluminescent freckle, uniltìranyu - dream walker, tìyawn - love
credits for dividers: leafs (x) green line (x)
#kendra's works !!!#loak x female reader#lo'ak x reader#lo'ak x you#lo'ak x y/n#lo'ak sully#lo'ak te suli tsyeyk'itan#lo'ak#lo'ak avatar#lo'ak angst#avatar 2009#avatar the way of water#avatar#atwow#lo'ak headcanons#lo'ak fic#avatar 2#avatar fanfic#atwow lo'ak#a:twow#avatar lo'ak#avatar james cameron
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(18Trip Translation) Tao Kinouchi SR: Welcome to Prison Island - This is how you get hyperfixated
Title: Literally means 'This is the entrance to the swamp', 沼 (swamp) is also a slang term originating in the mid 2010s which means you get addicted to some kind of media and can't get out of it. So, uh, hyperfixation? lol
Part 1
Location: HAMA House West Room
Chihiro: We have tomorrow off, so TaoTao, let's play Anigun like we promised tonight!
Tao: This is my first time playing a Full Dive FPS…
Chihiro: It's pretty much the same thing as mahorova, so you don't need to worry so much. It's okies ☆
Tao: mahorova?
Chihiro: Wuzzat? You've never logged in that?
Chihiro: It's a virtual space on the net— It's probs easier to experience firsthand than explain~
Chihiro: Alrightie, first we gotta put a patch behind your ear—
Tao: Alright.
Tao: It can measure brain waves and observe movements like this? That's pretty awesome.
Tao: (Things sure have improved since the era of polygon games where you'd put a metal rod in your shoulder if your arm broke.)
Chihiro: All done with the patch? Now you gotta pick an Animal to play as! (1)
Tao: Each animal’s got its own set of abilities and skills, and also different fighting styles, right?
Chihiro: Yeah. Chii always uses the cat. The Field Trickster ☆
Tao: (So Chihiro focuses on speed… In that case, I think a type that can switch between defense and offense depending on the situation would have the advantage over him.)
Tao: (What should I do? Since it's my first playthrough, going with a balanced type and seeing how things progress would be a safe bet…)
Tao: I'll… go with this bear.
Tao: (It's power-focused with high HP stats. Seems suitable for both DPS and tanking.)
Chihiro: You chose carefully~ Nice~! Looks like I won't need to go easy on you ♪
Chihiro: Round 1! GL~ Game Start!!
[Flashing]
Tao: (The scenery's changing…)
Tao: (I'm entering the game's world—)
Part 2
[Flashing]
Tao: Ah… Damn, I lost! You really are strong, Chihiro.
Chihiro: You're strong too, TaoTao! It was your first time playing, but you did real good ♪
Chihiro: You're a gamer through and through. If we keep going at it, Chii might lose…?
Tao: Should we try this multiplayer mode next time, instead of the training grounds? We can play against other users, right?
Chihiro: OFC! Let's co-op as a duo next ♪
-
Tao: … We lost. Sorry, I wasn't much help.
Chihiro: No probs! Chii's just enjoying this without caring if we're winning or losing.
Chihiro: TaoTao… Are you having fun?
Tao: I'm having lots of fun. Actually, we should try again.
Chihiro: Okies. For hardcore gamers, the real challenge’s at the top ♪
Tao: Alright– Let's go!!
-
Tao: Ah~Damn it, we lost! One more time!
-
Tao: I totally messed up my aim… Damn. And we were so close, too… One more time!
-
Tao: O-One more time! I'm really feeling it now...!
Chihiro: W-We're still going!? It's gonna be morning soon, y’know?
Tao: Is it already that late… Sorry for dragging you with me, Chihiro. You can go to sleep, I'll go solo for a while.
Chihiro: You sure...? Chii's heading to sleep first, then. Good night~
Tao: Good night. Thanks for hanging out with me.
-
Chihiro: *yawn*~ Morning… Woah, you're still playing!?
Tao: Morning. I'm starting to get the hang of it. I don't wanna forget what this feeling's like.
Chihiro: Th-That so? I'm glad you're that into it, but still…
Chihiro: Chii's done with breakfast, so I'm going shopping.
Tao: Mhmm. Stay safe.
-
Chihiro: I’m home~
Chihiro: Y-You're still playing!?
Tao: Damn, this guy's good! I'll show you…!!
Chihiro: You've been playing all this time. Isn't it about time for a break?
Tao: I've finally gotten used to the controls, and I'm getting the hang of shooting… Eat that headshot!
Chihiro: Hey, have you eaten? Aren't you hungry?
Tao: Not at all.
[Stomach growling]
Chihiro: Nopes, your stomach's growling.
Chihiro: You gotta put something in your body… That's it!
Chihiro: I got the tapioca drink Raiting gave me as a gift~
Chihiro: (I'll just hold it up to TaoTao's mouth—)
Chihiro: He drank it all before I could even say “Thirsty?”! Didn't even bat an eye!!
Chihiro: Is… His body seeking the nutrition!?
Tao: Anigun… Is so fun… I wanna keep playing till I die…
Chihiro: Hey TaoTao, let's take a break! Pretty please!
Tao: Shotgun secured— Oraoraora, eat lead!!
Chihiro: You'll starve and die, TaoTaoooo~~!!
NOTES: (1) this gets lost in translation, but chihiro makes to say animals in katakana as an english loanword and then corrects himself and says it in japanese, tao then repeats the japanese word. hence the difference in capitalization
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chapter 145 thoughts!
what even was this chapter, y'all. i'm getting a migraine.
While it certainly wasn't actively bad, it basically hits on enough of the issues I've been having with the Movie Arc that if you've been reading my chapter reviews lately, you could probably write this one yourself. Weird pacing, skipping over interesting parts of the movie, continued framing of AQRB as a shallow gag and failing to follow on any of the implied development from or literally any referenced fallout of the kiss in 143? It's all here, babes. It would ultimately just be boring and redundant for me to go over all that at length again, so I won't.
I will however say that I'm pretty disappointed we're blasting through what had the potential to be some really interesting bits of postmortem characterization for Ai, even filtered through 15YL. I don't mind the manga breezing past scenes we saw firsthand but like… how did Ai react when she realized she was pregnant? How did she feel, especially given that Spica once again emphasized her longing for a family of her own? IDK. The way the story is suddenly jolting forwards in these last few chapters and skipping such huge chunks of Ai's life ultimately feels very strange and I don't know what to make of it yet.
Everyone reacting to Crow Girl's acting was pretty funny though I'm kind of exhausted with Ruby's Gaga-For-Oniichansensei Gag Character flanderization. IDK if my tolerance for it is just decreasing or if it really is amping up, but at least in the 125-137 stretch I at least got the sense that they could be in the same room and have a normal conversation but ever since 139, it feels that bit more relentless. I imagine this would be less irritating if we knew how the aftermath of 143 had played out but it really seems like the manga is going to drag this out until we're all old and grey.
THAT SAID, this chapter does confirm that Aqua's hoshigan stayed white after that chapter and… eh. Who even knows what that means lol. It does at least imply that his talk with Ruby has brought him back to Baseline Aqua but Baseline Aqua is still a guy with every single mental illness on planet earth so I don't know if that's the world's biggest W quite yet. It certainly implies an improvement over double black hoshigan but… again, with Aqua being so totally cut off from the readers this whole arc and no idea of what happened in the aftermath of 143, it's impossible to make a meaningful guess as to wtf is going on with Aqua right now.
Oh yeah, uh. This chapter also I guess constitutes the reveal of how the AQRB reincarnation happened. I guess LMAO. Honestly, I don't have much to say about it other than it feels like a bit of an anticlimax for me? The idea works fine, the execution just left me… idk. Whelmed at best, underwhelmed at most. I feel like this backstory and the implied deep fondness for GRSR -> AQRB it implies doesn't really like up with the personality she displays in the Private arc but like, I kind of feel like she was tossed into the story without Akasaka having a clear idea as to what her role was even going to turn into so maybe that's not a surprise LOL
I will say I'm glad this seems to quash the theory that Aqua and Ruby were secretly capital-G Gods, instead framing it as a Tsuru no Ongaeshi type return of kindness to two otherwise mundane people. There was some fun fan theorizing around the idea, but for me personally, Oshi no Ko is most interesting when it focuses on that aspect of the story Akasaka highlighted in an interview recently, of human relationships being warped by the entertainment industry and I think an explosion of the emotional stakes to the cosmic scale of AQRB (or tbh any of the characters) being Secretly Gods All Along would be a bit of a shark jump for me and would really shift away from what I like about the series most.
That's kind of it for this one…! Not really a lot to say about this chapter, which is why most of this review was me explaining why I didn't have a lot to say about it.
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I've already written about how last Twilight pissed me off, but there's something else that annoys me - it's the way Mhok feel expendable for Day and his family. You see, I remembered a certain video I've seen somewhere and scene from the series, after watching the last episode of Last Twilight.
In the first video, a guy says that women should fix their men, stick with them when they can't cope with their traumas, and generally that they should be their "therapists, coaches" and not leave men alone with their problems. Supposedly a "positive" video, right? And under his video there were a lot of women's comments who wrote that they did exactly that, that they "improved and fixed" the men who, when they decided that they were already "fixed", they broke up these women and started new relationships as the "new, improved men". There were a lot of these voices.
The second was a scene from some series (with my memory of a goldfish, I can't remember which one, maybe Elite?), where a poor boy gets involved in the bunch of rich people and someone warns him that nothing good will come of it, to not trust them, that the rich people will take advantage of him and they will throw him away when they no longer need him or get bored with him.
And I really thought about it immediately after watching the finale of the last episode of Last Twilight and the trailer of the next one. Because that's literally what happened: Mhok "fixed" rich boy Day and got fired. I still have an image of Mhok in my head, with a blindfold trying to understand Day. I remember Mhok taking care of Day, all his small but important gestures, when he protects him from bumping into things and tripping. Mhok fixed all of Day's broken relationships. ALL OF THEM. He has done so much for Day that I don't even know where to start, the whole series is about Mhok doing everything for Day. THE WHOLE SERIES IS ABOUT THIS. About slippers, running shoes, quitting smoking, trips, various activities, literally climbing mountains for him. And the series showed Day and his wealthy family literally getting rid of Mhok under a really stupid pretext, when Day is already set for the future, for success - thanks to him. Nobody says stop, wait a minute, it's too harsh, let's talk, let's give Mhok a chance to explain himself (and Mhok WANTS to explain himself). But when he tries to talk about HIMSELF for once, his problems and traumas, he is simply thrown out the door. Everything Mhok has done for Day, for this family, all his sacrifices are completely ignored and dismissed. He's not worthy of their time to expalin, to talk. Not worthy to give a fucking chance which he deserves simply for what he's done for them.
What further irritates me is that Mhok is constantly perceived by them as someone who is FOR DAY. Day's mother tests him, checks him, evaluates him only in terms of whether Mhok is taking care of Day properly. Day kicks Mhok out for what he considers to be the wrong kind of care Mhok provides for him. Mhok does not exist as Mhok. Mhok exists as Day's carer, boyfriend, and must live up to the high expectations of Day and his family, with no room for the slightest mistake. And being thrown out the door for not meeting this super high standard that he was not even aware of! And I can't help but feel that he is treated this way because he is not someone important, rich, who could be treated this way WITHOUT CONSEQUENCES.
Last Twilight showed that people warning other people about the "savior complex" and about being "dispensable" to the rich are true lol
No matter how I look at it, no matter how many times I think about it, I really don't want Mhok to go back to Day. Mhok deserves someone who will give him back exactly what he gives, an equal relationship, unconditional love and support, he deserves a relationship with an adult, with ability to regulate and handle their emotions (like Phojai). He deserves, above all, respect.
I know trailers can be misleading, but it bothers me how Day and his family are shown in bright colors, laughing, while Mhok is shown in subdued colors, without a smile. And the fact that Day goes down the escalator without a cane. Can he see??
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