#i'm not that much into religion myself
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Hii! Been a while!
How has your day been? I hope it's been good so far!
I've been into Angel's recently and in one of the videos I watched about Abaddon the angel of Destruction — it said he is the ruler of the bottomless pit(presumably hell), it made me wonder if Lucifer is just a prince or somehow in someway he's still the king. Abaddon himself is a mystery, since he is never mentioned in the Bible but in another book I completely forgot about, but he used to be described as a place, his name is often used to refer to hell; "The fires of Abaddon"(or something along those lines) being the most popular so far. I like to think Abaddon IS hell, he's both a person and a place - I think his real form is hell itself, and his angel form is just a normal being, but that doesn't explain how he holds the key to hell if he's hell himself, and it's weird to think demons live inside him(creepy way to describe that)
Lucifer on the other hand is well known, fell from grace and all those things I completely forgotten about. But does he really count as the king of hell when Abaddon is the embodiment OF hell and the ruler OF hell, I guess if you put it that way.. he rules over hell but not hell itself?? I don't know how to describe it but, he rules the metaphorical place named hell but not the demon's inside hell???? But if we go with my idea on him being both hell and angel, wouldn't that mean he does both rule hell and hell itself?
I wanted to know your thoughts about this, since we all know Lucifer is the first angel to be thrown out of heaven — but some books did state that Abaddon had been the one to trap Lucifer in hell, and that he owns the key to hell, so wouldn't that count as him being the king of hell?? Idk really, my brain rot rn is just angels! Sorry if this is very long :(
— 🫚 Annon who isn't Christian just fascinated with Demonology and Angels!
🫚 anon, Abaddon is actually referenced in the bible (At least the in the copy that I own: The New American Bible), specifically in Revelations 9:11, as the fifth trumpet, as well as in Job 26:6. What I'd prefer to focus on is the former.
In Revelations, there are 7 trumpets are sounded by 7 angels that are set to cue events that occur during the apocalypse. 7 angels. Based off of this Abaddon is a person. However, that does not mean that Abaddon can't also be a place, just like how Hades can refer to the Greek God, as well the Underworld which he rules over.
Furthermore, he is an angel, not a fallen one, but an angel that continues to serve God, so it would fit what you stated that some book reference that Abaddon has the keys to hell, which would have been presumably given to him by God created to punish demons and fallen angels. (he is also the one to release the scorpions that torture whoever doesn't have the seal of God: keynote: torture not kill. This is important because God forbids murder, thus by abiding by this, Abaddon continues to serve and listen to God.)
Now, think of what hell is. It is the home of demons and sinners. But that is where they are sent as punishment by God. That is where Satan and all the fallen angels are trapped. Satan may rule over Hell, but it is just as much his prison as it is the sinners.
So the way I interpret this is that Abaddon is not so much a ruler over Hell, but something more like a prison warden.
#✒ ooc#i'm not that much into religion myself#my elementary AND high school had a class called CLF: christian life formation#but tbh that was more just: how to be a good christian and here is a comprehensive guide to our religion!!#and then i became an atheist#take all of this with a grain of salt lmao#i thought of this in just like. 10 minutes.#☏ 🫚 anon#how did i get from writing yanderes to religion 😭
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Thinking so hard about Logan's faith
He really is a man that has lost everything. EVERYTHING. In every timeline, in every universe. So much loss and betrayal and pain.
This "worst" wolverine has absolutely nothing. No friends, no family, no xmen.
And yet he doesn't think life is unfair. TO HIM. He thinks life has been unfair to all the good and innocent people around him, but not to him. Because unlike him, those people deserved a good, long life that he's been cursed with.
And yet he's not a hopeless man, not really. Because after losing everything, it just takes Deadpool and Laura (two people he didn't previously know!!) to remind him that goodness exists. That purpose is something that he can still have, if he wants it.
And Logan believes. He believes so hard in them because, deep down, something in him knows that humanity is not only worth fighting for, but also that he wants to fight for it.
Deep down, despite everything, he wants be good (which he is, he just doesn't see it)
#i watched this movie to laugh at my favorite Guy deadpool and yet#i find myself thinking about logan and how fascinating of a character he is#someone who's lost SO much and yet keeps finding the strength to look at humanity with heart eyes#with a forgiveness that you can only find in those like him#who keep losing and yet have a faith that rivals any religion#holy shit I'm DEEP in this character that never really spoke to me before#wolverine#logan howlett#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool 3#wolverine meta#hells originals#hells rants
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something i've already posted about in the past but am thinking about again because of the conversations in this episode is that i still truly do not understand bells hells'(well, particularly ashton's) view on what is going to happen if the information about aeor gets sent out to the people of exandria. obviously, i'm not an average person living in that world and am instead a viewer of the media with fairly extensive knowledge of the lore, so i could definitely just be missing what the impact would actually be! but the insistence that it would be a world shattering revelation that completely turns everyone against the odds just... doesn't make sense to me?
unless ludinus has a way of editing the information he presents and can take away the context, which would basically make the "footage" even more strange, what they're going to be seeing is... the gods saving themselves from people with the active ability to murder them all and having a rather humanizing crisis of what they should do about it? i guess the working with the betrayer gods part could be considered the controversial aspect of it, but overall, considering everything else that was destroyed in the calamity, aeor really was the one instance that was closest to being "justified". i don't think anyone who cares enough about the gods for this to cause any sort of big disruption of faith would have as big of a problem with it as they are assuming, nor do i really think it's something that would cause mass revolts against the gods in people who aren't devout.
#critical role#cr spoilers#i have spent so much time thinking abt this tbh. so much of my brain power is dedicated to thinking about religion in exandria#i do admit that i'm thinking about it in a way that is very logic-driven when if in the scenario itd be more emotion-driven#this is just nonsense from my thoughts attempted to be put into words that make sense to anyone besides myself LMAO#i was gonna add another part about why their idea that it will Massively interupt their power is strange also#considering the fact they watched a freshly Completely wiped out of followers everlight have the same power as all the other gods in aeor#but this post is long enough and i feel like whenever i post about this im worried abt how it comes across#so i dont feel like adding on to it anymore than i have sjskfn#i am honestly just very tired of god debates. i think there was more interesting parts in last night's than some of the others#but it feels so circular every time. and i still love you orym for being the one who sees this and i want to give him a kiss about it
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little lord cottonball gazing down from his ominous perch
#cats#Actualyl very too stressed and tired to type much in the tags for once as I typically do lol#I have many appointments this month and other things plus like 3 projects I'm trying to finish so... eughhghh#I actually have like 5 outfit pictures orsomething nearly completely ready to post on here and plenty of like#Content or things I could be posting to keep up some semblance of being a Normal Social Media Using Person but#idk.. i have to be in a very specific mood to post online lol.. a very vague conceptual state#It does not come naturally to me at all especically when I'd rather be off in my own world doing whatever like organizing rocks#and rolling little balls of clay and thinking about fantasy elven religions and etc.#like when stressed out so on and so forth... so I actually have to force myself like 'hey... remember.. you did an outfit.. POST IT' etc#ANYWAY...#a beauntifulle little cat image...
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i have officially returned. ask me anything.
#random thoughts#i'll probably answer it tomorrow because i'm tired. i don't know why.#ciel if you see this i've been nicer to myself these past few days following your birthday. taking care of myself in general aspects.#which i sort of hate myself for but it's okay because. uh. i won't be like this forever. i'll be better at what i'm trying to do i promise.#new year's resolution is not fucking with me.........#oh also!! i've been sort of feeling like a dead person at times. and also like a cockroach. i have had to repeatedly tell myself that#i'm not dead i'm not dead!!!!#because i'm not. obviously. and i know i'm not. my brain is just silly. it likes to tell me i am things i am not like book characters.#and recently my mother got me my own rosary and we've been practicing praying together with my brother.#can you imagine how bad it must be for me to turn to christianity as a coping mechanism? not even when i was terrorized with death thoughts#not even in august for fuck's sake.#but it's actually not that bad. though i think i like the idea of organized religion more than i like being a part of it.#also i feel like my being catholic (mostly non-practicing) is betraying the queer community somehow. like. queer people have suffered#so much because of the christian church in general. so it's like. being christian is weird when i'm also queer.#but also then i feel weird when i try to do things in relation to christianity. like. put saint in my artist name.#that feels blasphemous i don't know. is it?????? it's not that serious either way but. augh.#i am going to write a song about this. also fellow christians is it okay to use the lyric 'uselessly clutching her rosary' or is that bad?#because i mean. technically. the she i'm referring to sort of is. because god isn't solving any of our problems.#he's just fucking. watching. if he's even real.#(and no my disappearance isn't related to the catholicism thing it's something else. as in the one thing i haven't told anyone else but cie#and an irl friend. if you are ciel then i am completely open to talking about said thing.#otherwise i will continue to drop cryptic little notes on my blog because I AM SILLY. {: )#going to play roblox now and maybe say hello to you fuckers on discord for a bit of fun. goodbye.
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some men are textbook villains fr
#tw religion?#kinda need to rant.. kinda wanna explain what's going on#some ppl are part of humanity but don't know how to be humane... like the guy i started talking to almost 2 weeks ago#liked him a lot bc he was funny sickeningly sweet mature and understanding.. until he was not#tl dr version is that we somehow drifted to the topic religion and i told him im not too religious and don't believe in superstition much#i was extremely respectful and even when he said that he does believe a lot i was like 'thats cool!! different people believe in different#things!!' and at first it was a normal convo until man went all psycho on me (after one damn week!!!) and started talking about how#id have to be religious in a relationship with him.. my dude i barely know your fav food can we not talk about relationships yet#but he says he doesn't even need a woman who cooks/cleans just someone who believes.. n im like i get it but i can't change myself like that#and then guy moves to marriage and is all 'well my entire family is religious' n my mom and sister (who's 16) would be putting pressure on#you n force you to pray etc.. and I'm like???? who can force anyone to a thing like that are u kidding#things escalate and my absolute STUPID ass tells him about my deepest fkn trauma to explain what made me abandon religion bc#life just never got better and this trauma remained for yrs... and he gets so angry that he says he wants to stop talking to me just to spam#me all day next day.. he'd keep messaging me switching between 'i still want you we shouldn't throw this away i have feelings for you'#AFTER A WEEEEEEKKKK!!! and then goes back to 'i wasted my time with you you were so unnecessary im in a bad mood bc of you'#even said 'you'll never find a guy with a trauma and mindset like this. i will find a religious girl but no one will love you like that'#and the worst thing is that he told his friends and mom about the trauma i had just to spite me.. note that he promised to never tell anyone#(and then still asked for forgiveness and for me to rethink whether we want to end this after telling me 473626x he wanted to end it)#(nothing even ever started you bitchass)#also note that his mom knows my mom n basically most of my relatives.. so i was here trembling for days fearing they'd get to know about it#mom somehow convinced her to not tell anyone bc it's important to me and very very fucking personal..#but he harassed me all day - i wouldn't answer and he'd send 55 messages.. multiple missed calls like dude i got so fkn scared#my heart jumped whenever he texted he was so fkn aggressive and SO MEAN#'you just needed to adjust and we would've been okay' 'tell me are u gonna fkn be religious or not????' 'you ruined everything' kinda mean#i just :') it was the worst time and i don't think i've ever seen someone degrade me so much or make me feel this defective#but.. it's finally over. his mom called my mom and mine was like pls teach him some manners.. n since i couldn't and wouldn't text him back#and literally avoided whatsapp bc of him she ended it all for me and now it's hopefully done forever#anyway i saw jks gcf performance yday n him singing still with you put a genuine smile on my face.. ill stick to THAT boyfriend honestly lol#def gonna delete later#but ty for reading if u did <3
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Shoutout to my siblings for putting up with my neurodivergent ass. Just now I remembered how multiple times I tried to convince them that we should roleplay a complex trading system between towns and/or nations. I wanted no plot, one dimensional characters, and all the focus on trade. It's a miracle they didn't tease me more lol
#why was I so obsessed with playing trade?#i enjoyed creating poltics; religions; histories; and cultures so much more but all of that stuff I prefered to do myself#why was trade the one worldbuilding thing I wanted to share?#anyway I was basically made for worldbuilding I guess#I do worldbuilding a lot and then never write stories for most of those#and then ironically many of my stories I feel lack good worldbuilding#it's like I can't blend the two :(#or maybe it's just that I get Too caught up in worldbuiliding so in order to focus on writing a plot I need to ignore it? idk#anyway my brain has been running in circles all day#i have spent all afternoon and evening sewing and scrapbooking#two hobbies I have never done before today#I also really really want to make a dollhouse by hand which is also something I've never done#why is creativity like this?#idk but I'm having fun :D#sorry I haven't been writing tho#personal
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It's fun being unable to tell if I have religious trauma or if I worry about hell the normal amount
#batty speaks#I hate saying religious trauma about myself because I feel guilty#like I'm fine about religion i just can't always handle jokes about the religion i was raised in and I worry a lot about hell and damnation#I wasn't abused or anything I'm just scared#and it did not help with my really bad paranoia when I was on different meds#anyway how much is the normal amount of existential dread and fear of torture#vent#religion tw
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The sexiest, most capable back in the entirety of Denmark 🥺😍
#i cannot express - using words - how much i love this man..#which is honestly ridiculous and at least i'm self aware but like..#this is my religion#he's my Gandhi#(no offense or disrespect meant towards Gandhi)#i just believe in this man and his capacities SO HARD#like.. i don't care what's going on i just **believe** in him and his talent#i support him fully at 10000% constantly all the time through everything#he's not just some bro i find really hot i genuinely respect and support this man as a person and as a player#anyway i'm hormonal ignore me#Kasper Schmeichel#king thicccness#danish captain america#i always say ignore me as if anyone is even reading the tags 🤣#i'm talking to myself here and i'm not fooling anyone#and side note.. is this admin a girlie? these song choices.. 👀👀
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GOD sometimes it genuinely irks me that stories like Orpheus and Eurydice or even Adam and Eve are criticized under a purely logical and heartless eye. "Why did Orpheus turn around" because he loved her. "Why did Adam eat the fruit" because he loved her. They both chose love over God. And they were punished for it and eternally cemented as fools.
Do you really think that Adam doesn't know what the one goddamn thing he's not allowed to eat LOOKS like? Do you really think that Orpheus would feel better if he hadn't turned around only to find Eurydice's cries for him were real? These stories are about pure love. They're about being punished for the sin of a love that conquers all else. They're both about forsaking God(s) to that end.
TLDR: If a God is going to forsake you for love than they are not a loving God. And they are directly to blame.
#it's controversial thoughts like this that got me time outs in empty dark rooms in primary school!#jokes on them I'm neurodivergent I liked being left alone like that#tw: religion#just in case#not marvel related#good news for the gays tho#diversity win! God hates EVERYONE! including the straight couples!#anyway this is a wildly different genre of post than I normally make but I've literally been bugging myself to make it for *years*#I could go on to talk about the blatant disrespect these stories give Eve and Eurydice#(ahem their importance in the stories boil down to women = bad women = weak women = stupid women = evil seductress)#but there's so many posts like that already I'm sure so I just wanted to shout out my boys Adam and Orpheus#who just love their wives. so goddamn much.
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yom kippur is my least favorite Jewish thing ever by principle. not eating is not becoming purer. ignoring bodily needs for a day doesn't get me any closer to god. if anything it's just distracting. why are we trying to become more like angels on the most sacred day. ugh
#additionally going to shul on yom kippur has always made me uncomfortable#my curse is no matter how much i say i don't actually care about judaism i'll still be having in depth conversations about it with myself#so frustrating how i can't just cut out that part of myself#it goes beyond still living in a religious household and going to a religious school and all#i still know so much judaism#i'm don't believe in the religion but i'm still jewish in every other aspect#hell i make jewish ocs#it's upsetting#part of me really doesn't want to be jewish#the other part called herself jewishcissiekj#UGH!!!!!!
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I was so intense when I was 17. Like, my religious rants? My suicidal tendencies? I was so full of rage and sorrow and regrets looking back at it it's insane.
#been reading a few religious rants from 2020 and damn boy you sure are something#they weren't half assed rants either. i was passionate about it#those years are CRAZY cuz i know what stuff happened but I can't really remember them happening#call that the antidepressant induced blurriness#also the year i cut my own hair to feel more like myself (🏳️⚧️)#so much shit was going on#also did drugs at a weird sorta concert with a stranger older than me... honestly a miracle I'm still alive guys LMAO#dw guys that was a one time thing#...does this cound as venting? doesn't feel like a vent but yk to be safe#tw vent#just screaming into the void#themetalbabygirl vague lore drop? more likely than you think#my takes on religion were so HOT y'all wouldn't survive them#gerard way was right#teenagers do scare the living shit out of me#half asleep typing this gnight fans who read this whole thing✨
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Hey random life pro tip but you can and should always examine your thoughts, opinions, beliefs, and assumptions because they all come from somewhere. ESPECIALLY the ones you take for granted. It can be super helpful to just get a little curious and ask yourself "hm. That's interesting. Where did I learn that?" (The answer is usually your parents/family or culture/society/religion).
For example, if you feel worthless because you don't have a job, take a moment to think about where you learned that you need a job to be a valuable member of humanity. That idea didn't come out of nowhere. It probably came from being raised in a capitalist society built on the Protestant work ethic. This also applies to ideas like "I'm boring" or "I'm ugly" or "nobody likes/loves me" or "nobody will like me if I x" or "I have to do x or else y" or "x people are y" or really any other thought/belief.
Importantly, you should not shame or judge yourself when you realize that some of your thoughts/beliefs may have come from somewhere you *really* disagree with. I think this happens a lot for folks who leave a religion or political party and keep some lingering values like purity, keeping up appearances, and needing to atone for "sin". There's nothing to be ashamed of during this process because it's our weird, squishy brains that hold onto values so tightly without us necessarily consciously knowing that it's happening. Our brains don't come ready-made with the ability to disentangle your more conscious beliefs that you may have fully abandoned from less conscious ones that you've perhaps never noticed without conscious effort. When you notice these things, simply acknowledge them, label them, and ask yourself questions about where they came from and if you truly do believe them and why.
This is a continuous process that can take someone's whole life, because we are constantly picking up messages from others around us about how we as human animals "MUST" live in this world. I'm not going to lie and say this is an easy process to go through because you will likely be tempted to feel guilty and ashamed about holding beliefs that don't like up with your actual values, but just remember that it ALWAYS makes sense why/how you got to this point. We are all products of our genetics, relationships, and life experiences, and if you work hard enough and have enough information, you can track down where all the different parts of you came from. I would also highly recommend getting yourself set up with a counselor who you like and trust because they can help you work through disentangling these things without shame.
REEXAMINE YOUR BELIEFS ALWAYS. YOUR THOUGHTS ARE NOT REALITY, THEY ARE JUST THOUGHTS MADE BY YOUR SQUISHY ELECTRIC MEAT.
#on a personal level I'm currently trying to stop feeling the need to punish myself so much for things#I'm pretty sure it's from religious/parental trauma in how i was raised#it's not my fault AT ALL but i do have to live with the consequences and if i want to get better i have to put in the work#reexamining your beliefs is a crucial step in maturing and building a more cohesive system of beliefs and values#(and it's one of the keys to mental health)#cft#mental health#cognitive challenging#cognitive reframing#this is a really hard process but it is so so important#especially if you're going to involve yourself in things like activism#cause I've seen so many folks who clearly have not examined their beliefs since they left religion or radfeminism or the right wing#cause it's easy to say ''well i don't believe that anymore'' and move on without further introspection#it's harder to do the years of disentangling work#but if you don't do it there WILL be consequences for how you live and act in the world and how you treat others and yourself#ap
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the "I already bought tickets to go see Indy again next week" moodboard
#actually factually finalized the purchase it's happening same seats and everything lmfao#I am being very irritating abt this I'm not sorry I had so much fun today and I loved this movie to bits#and I'm so happy this is how we as fans get to close Indy's adventures like.#it didn't just feel like half-hearted fan service bullshit it was really well done which I'll be honest#I was not expecting. there are def call backs of course to the previous films#but it didn't feel like heavy handed or cheap#they really did a good job of like. making it feel authentic like. not just a shitty rehash idk for me#it felt like. so appropriate. like he's an old man now. time has passed. they don't just like wallpaper over that#it just has idk so much heart. like the old og movies it's fantastical but there's so much heart#idk I really liked it. it felt like watching the old ones. the old ones had so much heart. that's why you loved indy!#he was a smart ass but he was earnest too and he had heart and he cared and like ahhhhhhhhhh!!!#it's just. idk idk idk I feel like it's such a great close to the adventures for massive Indy nerds like myself#lmao I asked my mom tonight like when was the last time you watched any of the movies#cause you mught wanna rewatch before we go#and she was like well it has been a while cause you don't live here anymore#and I was like I know. I'm never like six months removed from the last time I watched an Indy#and she was like I know it's your religion I know#I just. I loved it. a lot. I really did. as a massive Indy nerd I really did just enjoy it a lot. more than kotcs#but I firmly believe w/o kotcs it wouldn't have been so fuckin good like omg#erin explains it all
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as much as I wish it were otherwise, I feel like the way I would die in a horror movie is absolutely going to some out-of-the-way location to learn about a local religious custom and getting sacrificed or something.
like on one hand, I am always scrupulously respectful of the belief systems I'm studying, including accepting that some knowledge is not meant for me and that's okay, but on the other hand, I have been known to do some truly stupid bullshit to learn about something esoteric that's on public display. lmao
#just me#plus honestly since getting out of evangelical christianity as a teen#I find that I don't really believe or disbelieve anything anymore#(except I guess for the religion I was raised in which I have very much distanced myself from)#I respect some religious institutions and practices more than others for sure#and I'm mindful of politics and abuse in religious sects#but when people hear I did rels in college they often ask#'so which religion is right?'#and I don't know that I can conceptualize it that way anymore#I was raised in a religious environment that didn't allow me to respect or learn about other religions and I hated it#I was so closed before that I feel like I've rebelled against that by being very open now#so everything feels equally plausible and implausible to me now#I don't know that I can fully believe OR disbelieve in anything anymore#maybe that part of me is broken#the part that can trust and have faith#even the part of me that can be sure that something ISN'T real#I don't know#but like... many religious folks and places are just happy to teach anyone who's open to their beliefs and practices#you don't have to be a true believer#they just want to share their religion with you in any way you'll take it#but sometimes you DO have to be a true believer#and those are the situations in which I feel deeply uncomfortable and try to avoid#but maybe I'll end up getting killed by some religious group that kills outsiders who don't fully believe in things lmao#dying as I lived: being a nosy bitch#cw:#religion
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Can't faith be like sexuality. Can't I be demireligious. Like yeah I can believe in God but only if I've forged a deep emotional connection with the divine in me and went through the pits of despair and horrors first. Like is that a thing.
#[meaningless statement]#i could try and weave thoughts about faith and divinity but i would fail i am literally shaking with exhaustion#so instead a funny thought#when we talk about religion i'm sometimes so puzzled by how to define myself#like - i'm faithqueer (not making it a real thing) - i'm on the spectrum#idk and i wonder how faith and a lack of emotional permanence can coexist#i have so much faith but i don't know in what#reciproeligious - i can have faith in God but only if i know he has faith in me first
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