#i’m sorry i’m still hurting

[clockworkbibliophile]

it is so beyond sobering and humbling and like the very straw that broke the camel’s back to find out that truly no one would care if I offed myself. like just experienced that very situation where it’s like. when I open up to someone they completely shut me down and tell me i’m being ridiculous. like….. hooo boy. my anxiety every second of every day emphasizes that I am a burden. but to actually experience another person more or less confirming one of my deepest fears. people who I thought I could confide in, people I thought cared. a person who never would i ever think that they would reject me in that way, hurt me like that. it’s crazy how painful it is to have that deepest of insecurities validated by external sources. I don’t really know how much longer I can stay around. it’s all too much and it’s all finally starting to start crashing down in a very real way.

[chaotic-birds]

fluffy Jason thought

if you like run your fingers through his hair, especially when he’s sleepy, he’ll kiss your palms and wrists. Especially after an argument, it’s like his silent little apology before the actual words (kinda like he’s hyping himself up in a way)

I love soft!Jason so much :,)

soft!Jason owns my heart. thank you for sending this in!!! my writing is a little rusty, but I had fun writing this so i hope you enjoy!

this is also uploaded on mobile so sorry if the formatting is weird. if it is, i’ll fix it later 😖

TW none | WC ~500 | G angst, fluff, h/c

masterlist

It didn’t take long for you to realize Jason Todd is not used to being loved.

He’s not used to the gentle touches or the soft voices.

But he tries to be.

He tries for you.

Jason’s head lays on your lap, eyes closed as he focuses on the feeling of your fingers threading through his dark hair. The slow motions bring comfort to his fast-paced life. It steadies his breathing and allows his body to sink deeper into the couch cushions.

Although Jason is becoming sleepier, he can’t bring himself to rest. Not when he snapped at you last night. Not when he knows the origin of his frustrations came from his self-hatred that he made you so scared for his well-being.

Jason reaches up to grab the hand that’s been playing with his hair and guides it to his mouth. He places tender kisses on each knuckle. Each time his mouth touches your skin, he can hear the echo of his words he had said to you.

Words that he regrets saying.

“I don’t need you worrying about me all the damn time.”

“I’m not a fucking child, and you’re not my fucking mother.”

“Leave me alone.”

“I can take care of myself. Been doing it for years, darlin’.”

“How about you worry about someone else?”

Jason kisses the inside of your wrist and lets his lips linger on your warm skin.

Skin that he loves to feel against his. Skin from the person he loves so much that it scares him.

Scares him because what happens if your skin becomes cold forever. What if…

“I’m sorry,” he whispers against your wrist. “I’m so sorry.”

Your hand cups his face, angling it so his blue eyes connect with yours.

“I know, Jayce. I forgive you.”

Jason’s lips twitch in a failed attempt to smile.

He should have never gotten mad about you caring for him.

If you were the one stumbling home after a bad fight, bruised and bleeding, he’d be fretting over you too. Hell, he’d probably react in more extreme ways.

“I’ll try not to worry so much,” you say.

Jason shakes his head. “I don’t want you to, but I understand why you do. I… I worry about you too.”

You smile, nodding. “I’m glad you do.”

Tilting his head, he questions, “You are?”

“Yup,” you reply. “It means you care.”

Jason’s eyes flicker from yours.

He knows he cares about you. He’d give his life for you. He’d take all the pain in the world if it meant you were unharmed.

But if he’s willing to do that because he cares about you, does that mean you’d do the same because you care about him?

Jason leans his head into your palm that’s still against his cheek as he lulls over the thought.

He’s not used to feeling loved. He’s not used to your soft touches and soothing voice.

But he’s trying.

Because deep down in his heart, he wants to be.

He wants to be loved.

He wants to be loved by you.

©️chaotic-birds // DO NOT REPOST OR MODIFY Please consider reblogging if you liked this work to show your support. Feedback/commentary is always welcomed.

[swedenis-h]

Phoenix Tatooine day trip Goes Wrong™️ (X)

This is a little idea where Luke needs something (don’t ask me what) that he can only get on tatooine, so dinluke adventure ensues. The plan is to get there and leave ASAP, but then nostalgia hits and he needs to hit every shop and place he used to as a kid. But you know, “college kids comes back to hometown” syndrome hits and he realizes he’s changed too much. Think of how the holiday season doesn’t feel the same anymore now that you’re an adult, same feeling. AND YES ITS ALSO DUNLUKE BECAUSE I WANT THEM TO KISS AND TALK ABOUT THEIR FEELINGS AND ALSO KISS.

Heres some extras 🫡

[sunnytheopossum]

HAPPY MARBLE HORNETS ANNIVERSARY!!!

This took… so long… I spent the entirety of yesterday figuring out the sketch for this, and today I woke up at 6 in the morning to watch the anniversary livestream (still watching it now), and now, ten hours later, it’s finally done! It probably didn’t help that I accidentally overworked the smoke effect by A LOT the first time around, so I had to undo roughly 3 hours of work to fix that. I am proud of the way it turned out though!! Like, super proud! I haven’t done anything this “artsy” in a while, and I think it looks nice!

(Overworked unfinished piece below cut bc I didn’t have the heart to delete it completely)

Oh yeah, and I also made this. If you know you know:

[cupiidzbow]

there’s a lot of things people made for me i haven’t posted recently and i need to get better at sharing them 💔💔💔 but here’s a c0mm from zuzofait on twt that made the soul leave my body 🫶🏽🌼🌊

[ender1821]

somebody hold me tight my gempearl people we are in the trenches i dont know what's worse the fact that pearl thought that gem and her stil had an unspoken alliance for wild life because they did it for secret life and that’s their thing (they trust each other until the end) but they DON’T or the fact that sl!gem genuinely loved pearl so much that what happened in the finale was a big betrayal for her and it hurt her so much that she feels like she can’t trust pearl now in wild life (and also how she is so bent on making friends and being on the good side of most because, well, she's been betrayed before right?)

gem is already on edge and will lash out at anyone that even tries to take, approach weirdly or do anything to her or joel but pearl doesn’t understand the importance of what they had in secret life held for gem. for gem the bridge of what they had was burnt alongside the sunflower field and it was burnt by pearl. for pearl the bridge was never burnt, it only carries the ashes of the field.

it’s the fact that despite all the bitterness and rage and anger brewing inside her, gem can't help but show a bit of concern when pearl tells her that she's had a rough day.

the layers of miscommunication between them are so many i need them to TALK and FIX this before something else happens.

does NOT help that Pearl’s minor slip up at the end of the cobblestone wall interaction indirectly fuelled more of Gem’s paranoia/scepticism for Impulse + Pearl, because her “well now I don’t know who to try this on, everyone else are allies” meant that she ONLY viewed Gem and Joel as enemies. which. isn’t the case. she just meant people who are neutral to her. because Pearl where did you get allies from you’ve been dying down in the mines and eating your own sword (/lh). but OF COURSE Gem would view that as them being enemies now. hey. you know what this miscommunication reminds me of. this lil minecraft series on youtube called Double-

narratively this is so. this is awesome man. i want to see how this resolves so bad.

[skriblee-ksk]

Hello Kris ♡

I come with some cute Jackiyuu winter fluff lol ♡ Enjoy!

Jack unzips his coat, holding it open for Kiyuu. She moves until they are face to face, turning so her back was pressed against his chest. Once comfortable, he zips his coat back up, sharing his warmth with her.

Thank you! ♡

HIHI SHEEPY!! THANK U FOR THIS JACKIYUU WINTER FLUFF PROMPT I LITERALLY AM CRYING

i literally love them sharing clothes so this is so perfect. i put them in a more snowy setting bc!!! it’s almost december!!! and i just KNOW Jack is warm asf. I saw a drawing that headcanoned that his hair and tail gets fluffier in the winter and that’s just. canon to me now. i think that headcanon is canon.

ANYWAY!! Kiyuu fun fact is that every clothes piece she wears has a purple on it. and if it doesn’t, she learned embroidery just so she can stitch a random purple thing on the clothes.

For her ribbon, she just has like multiple of the same kind so she can just. create different stuff w it. earmuffs. around a hat. or a beret, or etc.

ANYWAYS THAT’S IT!! TY FOR THIS SHEEPY!! i had a lot of fun drawing them together like this!!

Taglist (ask to be added!!): @kathxrat-01 @distant-velleity @scint1llat3 @elenauaurs @boopshoops @lumdays @venaue @jewelulu @thehollowwriter

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

Both Jason and Damian think the other has died during their time with the League.

Jason, in his grief, goes back to his plans of making Batman pay and beating his replacement into the ground.

Damian goes back to his assassin training like a madman, vowing to find the person who took Jason away from him.

It all gets a little complicated when he finds out Jason may not actually be dead at all.

[nicollekidman]

i’m a toxic buffy stan and person (one of my favorite scenes of the whole show is buffy beating spike almost to the point of death while he says that’s it put it all on me i love you please don’t throw your life away)

[snzluv3r]

this day was so insanely itchy and i had fits like this for what felt like every other minute (though i like to think i was better at holding back than that) everyday for a week because my allergies were so bad and my nose was so sensitive…i don’t remember what was setting me off but WOW did it make me sneeze lol

[crybaby-bkg]

“Why is my stomach in knots?” you grumble to yourself as you look in the mirror, quickly blending in your makeup. your hands move faster than they should, your nerves already shot to shit and the stiff, hard to blend blush is really starting to irk you. you frown when Bakugou pops in behind you, his face next to yours as he takes you in.

“Whaddya so nervous for?” he asks you, dipping down to kiss the curve of your neck. he’s learned to avoid your face until you powder yourself up, and then he can go crazy. but you’re still blending something wet on your cheeks, and he doesn’t wanna upset you more than you already are.

“What if our date isn’t perfect?” you whisper, finally setting down your brush, your hands wringing in your lap. but bakugou reaches over your shoulders, grabs your palms in his, brings them to his face to kiss and kiss at, despite the barely dried concealer you had swiped on them. he hugs you to his chest, careful still of your face, frowns at the way you try to hide your blooming smile at his affection.

“‘Course it’s gonna be perfect.” He reassures you quietly, pecking the side of your neck. “You’re gonna be there with me; that’s all that matters.” You pout at him through the mirror despite your smile, watching his own face soften as he takes in your almost ready face.

“But what if my date tries to order for me, and won’t let me finish a sentence?” You sigh all melancholy, rolling your eyes into your head. You giggle when he bites at the curve of your shoulder, trying to get away but he holds you tight against his chest.

“Then I’ll beat his fucking ass.” Bakugou mutters into your skin, feeling brave enough to steal a kiss on your cheek. Him being brave—the thought makes you laugh to yourself. Bakugou afraid of scaring you, the love of his life, and being afraid of your wrath from fucked up makeup when he battles villains all day. You turn in your seat, wrapping your arms around his neck when he kneels on the floor behind your stool. He almost looks like he’s praising you, with the way his chin tilts up and his gaze is hyper focused on you and you only.

“You’re such a nerd.” You tease, tucking your chin to your neck when he squeezes your thighs in his hands. He leans forward to steal another kiss, despite the way you lean away and try to push his face from yours.

“Shuddup,” he murmurs, bypassing your hand to peck your lips. He stands when you swat at him, kissing the top of your head this time as he makes his way out of the room to start getting ready. As he leaves, he speaks over his shoulder with a huff,

“And finish your face already. Stop depriving me ‘n shit.” He grumbles. You don’t comment on how red his ears are, his admittance of wanting to kiss you again and again, how he always does. You only blow him a kiss, laugh at the way his shoulders hike and his huffing under his breath, and finally finish getting ready.

[farosdaughter]

Sauron can mansplain, manipulate, mutilate his way through Middle-Earth for thousands of years and still genuinely love Galadriel btw. It’s called range

[aidens-ocean-galaxy]

Sometimes it really hurts how some people view my religion

[dykedvonte]

love seeing your takes on mouthwashing and how sane they are. everything's so black or white. I like how you acknowledge curlys abuse under jimmy (which I honestly didn't quite notice when I first watched a playthrough. should rewatch w this in mind) and how that very much doesn't "forgive" his inaction towards Anya and Her abuse under jimmy. I think what happens to him despite all his issues (bc he clearly wasn't OK 😊✌🏼) is very much karmic. I really did hurt huh

I hate the take that what happened to him is karmic as becoming disabled and being tortured is like not in any way an equal consequence for not taking more action against Jimmy. It is a consequence as is the whole game for everyone but it’s one that is very much established as being undeserved and extreme as everyone else’s but Jimmy’s fate.

Thank you for liking my takes but I also try to point out that this exact sort of framing of the events and what happened to Curly is bad especially if you are gonna factor in his own abuse into the equation of his inaction/ineffective acts. It’s like “saying yeah he deserved the abuse he was already going through to escalate because he didn’t do enough” which is like not a message the game tries to deliver at all. It’s like the game shows that abusers escalate

Karma and punishment are not concepts that I think should be directly tied to Curly’s fate especially since during the game and even in discussion he takes on too many consequences of someone else’s actions. Like this framing is the direct thing I describe taking the discussion away from Jimmy, P.E and the factors that created the environment in the first place.

[littlecrow4]

This is officially the LONGEST I’ve spent finishing a piece AND AGAIN ITS ALL BILL’S FAULT!!!

I’m gonna start sneaking in little Bill’s so it’ll be a fun little game of “Spot the Bill”

[helpimstuckposting]

Okay this ones a bit sillier, I'm just a hostage writing their banter into existence. There is no stranger things without silly banter, and I am just a mere mortal passing the message, bound by the laws of this world. Still sad tho, can't forget that.

I’m a ghost and you are a shadow

Part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven

—

From his huddle on the floor, Steve felt more hands on his shoulders and his back, felt more arms wrap so tightly around him and he’d never felt more secure in his life. His cheeks hurt and the muscles in his neck pulled uncomfortably around the lump in his throat, his clothes were days old and covered in dirt from the woods outside, and he had no idea what was going on but his arms were full of Robin and he could feel Dustin clinging to his side, and Nancy carding her fingers through his hair. El and Max were crying, everyone was crying, but Steve couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this happy.

He was so scared, so scared, that when he let go it would all be gone. He knew he wouldn’t be able to handle it, this time.

He felt Nancy step back, the warmth from just above his shoulder gone and he panicked, tearing his damp eyes away from the crook of Robin’s neck to look up. She was still there, smiling with tears in her eyes and she looked so young all of a sudden, Steve could imagine her face aglow with the rainbow lights of the Upside Down Lite Brite, excitement in her eyes like a child waking up on Christmas to find everything she ever hoped for under the tree.

“I’m gonna get the first aid kit,” she whispered, shuffling into the hallway. Always the responsible one.

Robin and the kids finally pulled away, helping him to his feet, and they hadn’t disappeared. A weight in his chest lifted slightly, the unsurety of it all still pressing down but one piece had been relieved. They weren’t going to disappear on him.

They made their way from the kitchen into the livingroom, sitting Steve down on the once pristine white couch. It was now a dull eggshell, years of wear sinking the cushions in and making it more comfortable than he ever remembered. His parents would flip if they saw it. Not that he ever wanted them to come back.

Nancy entered the room with a small white tackle box, sitting down opposite Steve and Robin on the coffee table in front of them. He glanced to his side and noticed a smudge of blood on Robin’s cheek, the one she’d had pressed into his neck. She didn’t have a cut on her face and for a brief moment he wondered where the blood came from until Nancy pressed a wet cotton ball into Steve’s neck. He remembered the knife Eddie had held to his throat, the sharp movement he made when the party burst through the door earlier. The blade must have sliced him and he hadn’t even noticed.

The party was quiet as Nancy patched him up. For some reason, Eddie was nowhere to be seen. He seemed like the most suspicious out of everyone and Steve couldn’t figure out why, but right now there were clearly more pressing matters at hand.

Steve looked around the room at the faces he never thought he’d see again, in the house that was definitely different than his own in the slightest of ways, but more lived in, more comfortable. Full of pictures he’d never taken, but he was clearly present for somehow.

“What…,” he started to ask, throat scratchy, not really sure how to begin. Nancy put away the gauze and tape, closing the tackle box with a quiet click. Everything from the morning flicked through Steves mind and though most of it was hazy, he tried his best to piece it all together. This clearly wasn’t a dream, and it didn’t seem anything like Max had described Vecna’s mind powers to be.

“What’s the date?” He finally asked.

Dustin squinted at him. Okay, maybe Eddie wasn’t the only suspicious one. “It’s May 8th, 1990,” he replied, “It’s been six months since you died.”

Died. There it was again. But the date was correct, Steve remembered that much.

“Listen. I know this sounds… crazy, but-,”

“Crazier than a girl with superpowers and a hell dimension?” Dustin cut in. Steve blinked up at him. He hated when he was at a lower eye level than the kid, made him feel smaller like somehow Dustin was the adult in the situation. The tone didn’t help either. Steve missed it so much.

“Okay, fair.” He started again, trying to gain his bearings and make sense of the situation, put it into words that they’d understand. “You keep saying I died, but for me… I remember you guys dying.” He glanced at them all again. They were watching him with varying levels of confusion, Nancy’s lips were pursed and Max’s were, too, in a similar way.

“The last time we fought Vecna, a few of us barely made it out alive. It’s been… it’s been years since I last saw you guys.”

They were quiet. He watched as they flicked their eyes back and forth between each other. He felt like an outsider once more, like they were speaking a language he didn’t quite know yet, like he was back in the Byer’s living room while Jonathan and Nancy tried to get him to leave. Before everything fell apart.

“All of us?” Max finally spoke, asking the question they were clearly communicating between all of them.

“Not… not all of you. But, Will and El… Dustin, Max… Robbie,” he looked at all of them as he said their names. “The rest of the kids moved away with their families, Eddie left when Wayne died. I’ve been..,” he paused for a breath. They were all still so quiet, letting him finish, though he took a bit to stumble through the words, “I’ve been alone for years. The Hawkins I know is a ghost town and I have no idea how I got here.”

No one really spoke, they just kept looking at each other. Steve glanced back between each of them, feeling like he was failing some sort of test he never studied for. He always hated silence, lived with it so long it became loud and overbearing. He didn’t want it to be so quiet when he was surrounded by people.

“I don’t think I’m your Steve,” he finished, just for one more thing to say, one more break in the quiet.

“Parallel universes,” Dustin muttered to himself. He seemed almost… excited? Like there was a new code he cracked or a gadget he could take apart.

Nancy and Max just squinted at him, the former glancing back to Steve out of the corner of her eye, assessing. She always stayed quiet until she’d figured out the next move, calculated all the variables in her head before saying them out loud. Dustin seemed impatient, rolling his eyes to the heavens and back down again.

“Like The Dark Tower?” he tried, groaning when met with more silence. “Stephen King?” Steve briefly wondered if Dustin ever got tired of acting like he knew more than everyone in the room. The kid needed a reality check in Steve’s opinion, but unfortunately for him, Dustin usually did know more than Steve.

“You know how The Upside Down is like a copy of Hawkins?” Dustin tried again, and the crew nodded back. “Well that’s like our world folded over on itself, it’s an extension and not a separate entity.” He held his hands like two Cs, miming a piece of paper being folded in on itself. “But a parallel universe is like a completely separate world.”

Dustin suddenly clapped his hands together. Steve flinched at the sharp noise, but Dustin didn't seem to notice, separating his hands by just a centimeter and keeping them held out in front of him. “It’s an alternate dimension that runs parallel to ours, with just slight differences leading to separate outcomes.”

“Like Narnia?” Steve asked. Robin let out a soft ‘ohhhh’ and pointed at him. Dustin groaned and his whole body seemed to sag in a parental-like disappointment.

“No, Steve, not like Narnia!”

“I don’t know, it sounds kind of like Narnia,” Robin said.

“Yeah, Narnia was a separate world,” Steve nodded at her.

“Enough about Narnia! It’s not like Narnia!”

“Seems like Narnia,” Robin muttered, but Dustin ignored her and powered through, though El was giggling to herself and that seemed like a win in Steve's book.

“Narnia is an alternate universe that’s completely different than ours. I’m talking about the same world with the same people, but certain decisions cause a split that leaves the world slightly different than the next one. We’re all fundamentally the same, but some of our experiences might be different! For instance, our fights with Vecna turned out different results. Okay? Do you get it now?”

Max rolled her eyes “Don’t have a conniption, you’re not the only person in the room with brain cells, you know.”

"Okay, let's just..," Nancy began, holding her hands up placatingly, "Let's take a breath and pretend Dustin is right, that this is some kind of parallel universe."

"I am right," Dustin muttered to himself, though no one paid him any attention, all eyes focused now on Nancy.

“If Steve is from a parallel universe, then… how did he get here?” she asked. Eyes turned from Nancy to Steve again, and Steve did his best not to cower under the microscope. Carol had taught him to hide his emotions, keep calm and collected, ‘people will respect you more, Steve, just look like you don’t care’. He stared back at them.

“I just… I remember waking up in the woods-,”

“What were you doing in the woods?” Max interjected.

“I… it doesn’t matter. I took a nap and woke up in the backyard, that’s it,” he lied. He didn’t want to delve into his traumas now. Though these people looked like his family, they hadn’t gone through the same thing he did. They didn’t know him the way they should. He could tell them later, if he needed to, but not right now. Robin still looked at him like she knew, though, still seemed to be able to read his mind, ‘I’ve got two brain cells, Stevie, and one of them is yours.’

He sighed as the crew all looked at each other again, resigned to remaining on the outside of this team that wore faces he’d longed to see again. He wasn’t their Steve, and they weren’t his family. They had codes all their own, glances that meant something he couldn’t translate, memories he wasn’t a part of. Steve Harrington was always meant to be alone.

“Wait,” Robin broke the silence. Steve watched as he could see the gears turning in her head, it reminded him of the look she got seconds before cracking the Russian code at Starcourt. “Wasn’t there a gate near your backyard already? From Barb?”

Steve blinked at her. Parallel universe or not, it seemed some events stayed the same.

Nancy filled in Robin’s train of thought, bouncing to the next. “Like you somehow came from the old gate?”

“Did you know that keeping scars healed is a continuous process?” Robin’s train of thought bounced again, seemingly out of nowhere. “The body needs to constantly focus attention on keeping the old wounds healed, it’s called collagen synthesis, which requires vitamin C. So, if you get scurvy the body can no longer maintain the process and your scars can reopen. Bones that have been healed for like twenty years can actually shatter again, too, it’s pretty creepy when you really think about it, like we’re never really fully healed even after decades and-,”

“Robin,” Steve cut in. “Are you suggesting the universe has… scurvy?”

“No? Well… I mean, I guess. I just mean, what if closing the gates wasn’t just a one-and-done thing?”

Nancy seesawed her head back and forth, “Like, what was holding them together is no longer working?” she added. Robin nodded, holding her palms up like Vanna White, presenting Nancy’s contribution to the room.

“Isn’t that kind of a stretch?” Dustin asked.

“We could check the gates,” Max said, “See if they’re still closed?”

El nodded, sitting up a bit straighter, “I can feel them out, see if anything has changed.”

They all worked so well together. Steve had forgotten how easily they came up with plans, the pounding of his heart against his chest as adrenaline raced through his body, sharpening his mind. It all felt so quick, so practiced, no time for dilly-dallying, no time for uncertainty. But… if they found out the gates had opened again, what then? Would he need to go back to his world in order to close them? He looked at each party member one by one, took in their enthusiasm at creating a new plan, at figuring out a puzzle placed in front of them. What if he didn’t want to go back? What was there to even go back to?

“Maybe-,” Steve cut through their chattering voices, and they paused to focus on him. “Maybe we should just check the backyard first. See if that gate is open, and then we can worry about the rest. We should also probably tell the rest of the party, they don’t know any of this has happened yet.” And maybe that could buy him some time.

Just… just a couple more days, a couple more hours at the very least. They weren’t his family, but they were closer than he’d ever thought he’d have again. He wasn’t quite ready to give them up just yet.

“Right,” Robin said, placing her hand gently on Steve’s arm. He wondered how desperately she had craved her own Steve’s touch, if she had sat awake at night feeling like half of herself was missing, ‘two brain cells, Stevie, and one of them is yours.’

She squeezed his arm, and he already knew the answer. She was still Robbie.

“We should call your mom,” Nancy nodded.

“My what?”

—

It’s the little things 👀 expect the unexpected, Stevie

@weirdandabsurd42 @sirsnacksalot @space-invading-pigeon @aliea82 @goodolefashionedloverboi @emly03