#i’m not saying i’m lonely

[badaseyebags]

i wonder what my soulmate is like.. and how much longer until we finally meet 😞 until then…

[noisilyscreechingsong]

Damian is de-aged to a baby and lost in Gotham. A magic user hit him with some kind of spell. His legs don’t work as well and he has trouble walking. That’s when a man appears and squats down with a tilt of his head.

“Yea, you are definitely not supposed to be out here, little guy.”

Damian glares at the man, early twenties, stubble along his jaw, ragged clothes, and dark bags under his eyes.

The man turns his head to look at the brick wall.

“Are you sure?”

And now he was talking to a wall. Curses. Of course he would be found by a crazy person.

The man suddenly hangs his head with a deep sigh. He regains himself quickly and stands. Moving closer to put his hands under Damian arms to lift him to perch on his hip.

Damian squirms to get down but refuses to make a sound. The last time he opened his mouth like this it was a pathetic baby sound. He couldn’t let this man see him like this.

“Looks like you’re coming home with me, little guy. I can tell you’ve got some spirit in you. Good, you’ll need it.”

Not ominous at all.

Damian stays with the man, mostly because he couldn’t physically drive a car, but also because he was almost always with him. The man would talk to air at the most random times. Obviously a schizophrenic. But Damian had to admit this man, Danny he comes to find out through a neighbor baby talking at him, has been genuinely trying to take care of him and take care of him well. Well, to the best of his abilities anyway. 

He feeds him organic purées that don’t taste half bad, except the carrots, that one was unacceptable. Danny cleans him regularly despite his crappy apartment and makes sure he is dressed appropriately for the weather. He makes an effort to take him out to the park to play in the sandbox or just walk around discovering ‘new’ things.

Damian doesn’t need a parent, he outgrew the concept when he was five and technically he already had one, but he could tell Danny would make an excellent father. Some mistakes can be overlooked compared to the effort he was putting in.

The only concerning thing was the talking to thin air. It took Damian an embarrassing amount of time to figure out the reason Danny was visiting all these random people and the graveyard. (Sometimes he will set Damian down to ‘play’ in the grass at the cemetery. It was quite odd.)

He was talking to ghosts. It wasn’t thin air or imaginary friends, no it was actually dead people. The reason Damian actually believes this is for two reasons.

One, Danny shows true results. Damian observes closely whenever they visit a ‘client’ and Danny always has accurate information despite never looking up or researching anything going in.

Two, he never calls himself a medium or psychic. He doesn’t boast about his ability to see ghosts. He does what he does to help the ghosts move on to the other side. Closure is what Danny always says. Closure for the family and the victim. In Gotham, there are a lot of victims.

Damian adjusts to his new life with Danny. It’s been five months and he’s getting used to being small and vulnerable. He’s allowed to be messy and whiny and childish. Danny never scolds him like Mother did. The man has never hit him or raised his voice at him and never expects anything from him. He encourages his progression to speak and walk, but doesn’t expect the best out of him.

It’s… nice. A good break if anything.

They are at the park when one of the bats spot him and pauses. Danny is blowing bubbles into the air and Damian tries to pop as many as he can. It’s a silly game with no clear rules, but Damian finds it entertaining nonetheless.

“Hi there! Is he yours?”

Dick Grayson wears a bright smile, but Damian can see the tightness around his eyes.

“Huh? Oh, yea, this is Damian,” Danny answers.

He had written it with the wooden blocks Danny had given him one week in. Danny took one look at the name on the ground, laughed loudly and ran with it.

“Do you mind if I say hi? He’s so cute.”

Danny looks puzzled by the request but ends up shrugging his shoulders, not seeing a problem with letting a stranger get close to Damian. (Damian knew Danny’s intense eyes were watching Dick’s every move. He was very protective like that.)

“Sure.”

Dick squats down to search Damian’s green eyes. Damian stares back just as intensely.

“Hey there, Damian. My name is Dick.”

Damian gives him a flat look at Dick’s terrible introduction.

“Grayson.”

Although with his little baby teeth not fully in it sounds more like ‘way-shah’.

Relief flashes across Dick’s face and he gives Damian a reassuring smile. It’s not as reassuring at he thinks it is. It promises to bring him home and restore him to his original age. Damian doesn’t know if that’s what he wants anymore.

Dick stands and gives Danny some imaginary excuse to leave quickly. Damian watches him go and so does Danny.

“Funny guy, huh Dami?”

Damian doesn’t respond and Danny notices his change in mood.

“Come here, little guy.”

He knows what Danny is going to do and willingly goes. He is pulled up into the man’s lap and held between two surprisingly muscular arms. Danny’s hugs are nice and warm. They aren’t too tight like Dick’s nor are they stiff like Bruce’s. He never thought he could enjoy human contact, but Danny has been showing him things about himself he didn’t ever know. Turns out he does like hugs and playing airplane and when Danny runs his fingers through his hair when he’s really sleepy.

“Let’s go home a little early today, huh? I’ll make spaghetti and you can be as messy as you want,” Danny promises.

Damian hums. Yes, that sounds nice.

That night Batman comes in through the window. Damian is waiting.

“Damian,” Batman whispers.

“Bah-mun.”

The flat, unamused stare is what gives him away.

Batman lets out a breath silently and reaches into the crib Danny had gotten him.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

Batman jerks into action, twisting to face Danny who had appeared suddenly. The door behind him is still closed.

Batman stays quiet, silently studying the man before him dressed in pajama pants and a worn t-shirt.

Danny tilts his head as he does the same. Damian has never seen the man so serious. He silently worries for the man. He didn’t want him getting hurt to unnecessarily protecting him from his father.

“I’d have to break your arm if you tried to do what it looks like you’re doing.”

Danny says it so plainly. So simple.

Batman straightens.

“He isn’t yours.”

He doesn’t say Damian is his. He doesn’t claim him as his own. Just that Danny shouldn’t have him.

Damian silently agrees because technically he’s right. He doesn’t deserve Danny. He can’t keep playing house like he’s an actual baby. But Damian is also selfish and over the last few months has been taught that it’s okay to ask for things he wants even if it’s not inherently beneficial. The stuffed dog he sleeps with every night is proof of that.

So Damian says nothing.

“He is now,” Danny answers simply like there was no other answer to such a statement.

“He needs to go back to where he belongs.”

“Over my dead body,” is the immediate response.

They stare each other down until Danny scoffs.

“Don’t think I’m not petty enough to fight you, Batman. I’ll fight anyone who wants to take him from me. Damian is mine.”

When Batman tries to forcibly take him, he ends up with a concussion, a blood nose, and two broken arms. Red Robin finds him in a dumpster the next morning.

The story continues with Damian learning how to be a child his age, Danny protecting him and doting on his brilliant son, and the Batfam’s frequent failed attempts to kidnap Damian back to them.

[artsymeeshee]

Second-guessing

[wishchip106]

when you need social interaction so you make cherik textposts instead 😻🫶

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16

[imtheiliad]

thinking about how 9-1-1 has been clawing its way to 100 episodes. how that milestone used to be reached by early season five by most shows with 22-24 episodes per season. how in these days of short seasons and streaming shows fight to get not even half that. and here we are in what will be 9-1-1’s third shorter season, and a network move, in season 7, at 100 episodes. and i’m just emotional because it’s the little weewoo show that could.

[amisonist]

I think I have too many memes like this tbh

[tsuchinokoroyale]

Happy new years… let’s stay hydrated together ✨

[dustyspines]

harry being all “it’ll take your feelings into account!!!” about the sorting hat humorously backfiring because ya… it did….. except all it did was push albus closer to slytherin because he met the weird malfoy boy and was like yeah I need to spend seven years with this kid fr

[rangersoup]

After chit chatting with @hail-hawk-eye about some of our biggest pet peeves, I’ve decided to make this loving PSA to the fic writers and also kind of just to the general populace of the 911 & 911 Lone Star fandoms:

My dear besties, the terms PARAMEDIC and EMT are NOT interchangeable. They are not just two different words for the same thing!!! They are two different things with two very different scopes of practice (treatments/procedures they are allowed to do). Using paramedic and EMT interchangeably would be like using nurse and doctor interchangeably.

This being said. Paramedic and medic ARE interchangeable. But medic and EMT are NOT.

Nancy, TK and Tommy are PARAMEDICS.

Chimney and Hen are PARAMEDICS.

Everyone else is either an EMT or nothing. But probably they’re all EMTs. I’m not 100% sure if it’s national standard yet, but like 99.9% of professional paid fire departments require their full time firefighters be certified as EMTs. So I’m gonna go out on a limb say most if not all of them are EMTs.

And while I have your attention: a combat medic (while still being called a medic) DOES NOT have the same scope of practice as a civilian paramedic. (Civilian medics have a wider scope practice). Eddie’s experience as a combat medic does not make him a civilian medic.

Anyway.

[paperstorm]

Something that just really really bums me out on a personal level, as someone who does not want to get married and have kids, is how inescapably relentless the 'nuclear family is superior to literally anything else' messaging is. How even shows where found family has been the show's whole overarching thesis, often end with a very clear message of 'these characters thought found family was enough for them but it definitely wasn't and now they will finally be happy because they have a marriage and 2.5 kids and a house in the suburbs which is the only way true happiness can ever be achieved'. This isn’t even about any one specific show because it could be about so many shows and it’s just ... sad. It's driven by post-war capitalism and I could get into all that on an academic level but it's also truly just deeply depressing because we do unfortunately live in a world where there is a lot of truth to that statement. We do live in a world where people who don't want that life all lowkey know that eventually our friends and siblings and coworkers will all get married and have kids and become so immersed in their nuclear families that they won't have time for us anymore and there won't be a community for us and that the found family we thought they cared about too was really just a waiting room, just something temporary that was only good enough until they found the people they really wanted to spend their lives with. And it's just sad that even in the world of fiction, even in media where the idea of found family is the entire premise, we can't even have it also be the happy ending. We can have season after season telling us how amazing found family is, but we can't have a series finale that doesn't end on a note of "but remember, found family is always temporary and will never truly be enough."

[madbard]

Siffrin is of the Lonely.

This is the fear of isolation, of being completely cut off from other people. This is the fear that preys on lone travelers. This is the fear that once trapped an actor in an endless performance, unable to perceive people as anything other than masked audience members and hollow performers. This is the fear that manifested during the apocalypse as a massive empty house that slowly feeds on your memories, making you forget your friends, family and identity until you are left an empty shell, completely alone.

As a rule, the fears are nigh-inescapable. But the Lonely stands apart even from the other entities, because it is actually impossible to escape it on your own. You must remember the people who care about you, even as memory fades and they seem years away. You must cry out for help, or reach out for a lifeline thrown by someone else, even if it feels like dying. Someone who cares about you must come looking for you, and they must not turn back, even if the Lonely tries to drag them in too.

The Lonely is the fear of being abandoned. What could frighten Siffrin more?

[customizablefriend]

My true self still loves Tommyinnit I am still an inniter at heart I have not changed

[valewritessss]

Growing up as an only child people would always like talking to me and say I’m nice and generous then when they found out that I’m an only child they’d tell me “oh so you’re spoiled and don’t know how to share?”. And it was always so frustrating because why would I be spoiled? Yes both of my parents attention was only on me but they raised me right? And I’ve met people that are spoiled and not brats, like spoiled brat and spoiled are two different things.

And I love sharing and always have bc I never had anyone to share with so I like letting other people use my stuff. One of my friends that I did so many things for all of middle school (I gave her homework answers, pencils, erasers, bandaids, some of my lunch, gum, etc) told me that I don’t know how to share because I’m an only child. We’re not friends anymore because at one point she started rushing me to do my work so she could copy and she would not let me concentrate and she wouldn’t copy my shit while I was doing it and then she’d get mad at me because she was failing. But anyway, I was a little mad because you KNOW me, but you’re just gonna say that because why, exactly? It was like people were always telling me what I should be like and telling me that I don’t understand any childhood experiences.

And then I get told I must not know how to compromise just because I’m an only child? Like what? I will do anything to please you so what the hell are you talking about.

And people go on rants saying that parents need to start having more than two children because they hate only children. I’ve seen this so many times and it makes me a little sad because my parents tried, okay? Generalizing is not cool. They’ll hate only children just because they had a bad experience with someone that happened to be an only child. And then I’ll make friends with someone and when they find out I’m an only child they’ll tell me they never would’ve guessed because they hate only children. Thanks, I guess?

“You must not have a very good family bond” uhh why? My cousins are the closest thing I ever had as siblings growing up and I genuinely don’t understand when they would say this because it doesn’t mean I can’t bond with people my age.

“You probably get everything you want” i was told this just because I bought a new notebook when my old one ran out of pages. Again, what is the thought process here because it’s not like I can ask for anything and get it just because I’m the only kid my parents have.

I would say I’m lonely and want a sister and people would get straight up mad at me. “No you don’t you’re lucky” and you think there aren’t things I want that you have too? I literally feel so alone 24/7 but I guess I’m not allowed to feel that because at least I get privacy.

They also always assume I’m rich. I am very much not rich and I did have friends that lived in bigger houses and it made me so insecure about mine. Idk what it is about assuming only children are rich. I wish being an only child came with that bc then I’d never complain again. But unfortunately it doesn’t work like that.

Anyways. This was a random rant. I just remembered that I would get so frustrated because I would literally cry from the fact that I didn’t have a best friend or someone like a sibling to talk to, and then I’d be told my feelings weren’t valid. I know this is such a non issue, but just sharing I guess.

[hplonesomeart]

Hey. Sorry about the inactivity, but pretty sure no one cared that much anyways lol. Been a looooong time since I kept that distant from Tumblr…at least now I know I’m able to survive without checking posts every day/being chronically online! I’ve got an intense love-hate relationship with this lifestyle I’ve dug myself into. Think I’m getting a little bit better with the balance even if school isn’t really giving me an option. Got a load of work I need to keep catching up on if I don’t want to disappoint my professors. We’ll survive somehow. Here take a quick batch of Puzzle doodles k bye

[esmeamesart]

‘Bet they never spared a prayer for my soul’

- Cassandra , Taylor Swift

Cassandra from fantasy high. Her relationship with Kristen makes me oughhhahhhhggbhh

[baroquefemme]

Practicing showing off 😘