#i’m about to buy microwave mac and cheese cups

[closetnerd62]

guys why is there literally no where to get pasta in my college town? this is actually tragic. pasta deprivation is a real thing and i am its latest victim.

[goodnessandgrief]

When I’m feeling depressed, it can be nearly impossible to take care of myself, and that includes eating. Here’s a list of some foods that require little to no effort (aka: can be eaten right out of the package or just need to be microwaved), mainly for my personal reference, but also so others can find easier alternatives when they’re struggling.

Water bottles or canned water - stay hydrated!!

vegetables - green beans, peas, corn, black/kidney/pinto beans, chickpeas (all canned or microwaveable frozen bags) - I’ve also tried Harvest Snaps, which are baked snap peas & they’re v good

Fruit - grapes, raisins (or any other dried fruit like apricots/dates), mandarin oranges, apples, applesauce cups, bananas, pears, peaches, etc. (most fruits require no prep anyway, but especially if they’re canned - you can also buy frozen bags)

Canned soup or chicken, beef, or veggie broth

Pasta (ramen, spaghetti, mac and cheese, chow mein) or instant rice are my go-tos. You can buy these in individual cups or bulk packs.

Any microwaveable food - frozen/tv dinners, burritos, toaster strudels (they make an egg bacon & cheese version too!), mini pizzas, breakfast sandwiches… there’s a lot you could do here :)

Dairy - Yogurt, cheese sticks, (or just straight up eat cheese slices, there are no rules here), cottage cheese, almond/oat/soy milk, powdered milk (if you want something shelf-stable)

Grains & carbs - cereal, crackers, chips, popcorn, toast or bagels (I’ve eaten plain bread before tbh and it kinda slaps), Oatmeal (these packets are dinosaur themed & have little sugar eggs!! - https://www.quakeroats.com/products/hot-cereals/instant-oatmeal/dinosaur-eggs)

Nuts - peanuts, peanut butter, almonds, cashews, walnuts, trail mix, etc.

Meat - deli turkey, trail bologna, spam, jerky, frozen chicken strips or nuggets, Morningstar vegetarian corn dogs, canned tuna

Eggs

Fast food or take-out is also a good option if you don’t feel like making anything yourself.

A little tip - most foods you would take on a camping or hiking trip are great! for some, all you need to do is add water & heat it up. they are usually on the expensive side, though!! here’s some I’ve found that are decent:

https://mountainhouse.com/

Things to keep on hand for particularly bad days:

⁠Boost/ensure/Soylent - liquid meals for when the idea of chewing or mixing anything is too much.

⁠disposable cutlery/bowls/utensils so you don’t have more dishes to worry about.

Multivitamins

Liquid IV, Gatorade, or some other form of electrolytes. It’s too easy to get dehydrated!

If you do have a little energy to cook or make something, here’s some ideas:

If you have a blender: frozen spinach + frozen banana + shelf stable almond milk + peanut butter makes a great smoothie.

frozen fruit + frozen spinach/kale for smoothies

Adding whey protein makes it more filling.

⁠dried pasta + jarred pasta sauce (Rao’s is low sugar and awesome, but pricey) + frozen meatballs

Boil tortellini on hand. Its as easy as boiling water. You can eat it plain, add a spoonful of pesto, sprinkle with a little olive oil or butter and some garlic salt, or pour it back in the pan after draining and add a little pasta sauce

⁠frozen fried rice + frozen stir fry veggies

⁠favorite frozen protein and veggies for sheet pan meals

⁠canned refried beans with a tortilla and some cheese to microwave, can add extra toppings too

⁠oatmeal + pb + dried fruit of choice

⁠rice cakes + pb + jam (or substitute bread if you have it)

Rotisserie chicken in a salad, soup, sandwich or wrap

Frozen salmon with some veggies

air fryer foods - chicken nuggets, tenders, fries, etc. You can also toss different vegetables (baby carrots, Brussels sprouts, etc.) in a little olive oil and throw them in there

chicken broth & frozen dumplings - you can dress it up a little with some miso, soy sauce or other seasonings. You could also add some frozen vegetables.

snack type food - a combination of canned Garbanzo beans and black olives. The olives are salty enough that you can get low sodium beans and it will still taste good.

A lot of these ideas I stole from the good people of Reddit (particularly r/depressionmeals)!Here’s the post I referenced if you’d like to look further into it:

[novelingviolinst]

Listen up, nerds. If you’re like me and hate trying to cook every day and prep lunches and shit, then have I got a mac ‘n’ cheese recipe for you. Total, it takes maybe 30 minutes to make and most of that will just be waiting for stuff to cook, and you will have lunch and dinner set for days. I wrote it with multiple units of measurement because I’m in the U.S. and measuring anything is hellish over here.

Cooking doesn’t have to be scary. Unless you’re a professional chef, cooking is 1 part science, 1 part whimsy, 2 parts love, and 1 part making shit up as you go. You don’t have to follow this recipe exactly, this is just the way I like it. Tweak and change it up how you want.

 This will make an unholy amount of mac ‘n’ cheese. You have been warned.

Good as Shit Mac ‘n’ Cheese Recipe That Will Feed You for Like a Week

Ingredients

1 pound (16 oz) medium shell pasta (or whatever pasta you want or have on hand, I’m not your mom)

1 pound (16 oz or about 4 cups) shredded cheddar cheese OR

¾ pound (12 oz or 3 cups) shredded cheddar cheese and ¼ pound-ish (4 oz or 1-1½ cups) shredded parmesan (Apparently, the shredded cheese you buy at the store has an anti-caking agent that supposedly makes it bad for a roux but I’ve literally never had a problem and I’ve been making homemade cheese sauce since I was tall enough to reach the stove)

1 cup (8 oz or 8 tbsp) flour (literally doesn’t matter what kind just be careful with flavors)

16 oz (2 cups) heavy cream

16 oz (2 cups) milk of choice (I use 2% lactose free milk to reduce tummy troubles)

16 oz (2 cups) cooked chicken breast OR

16 oz (2 cups) cooked ground beef OR

16 oz (2 cups) protein of choice (just make sure the flavor will go well with cheese or you will be in for a bad time)

16 oz (2 cups) broccoli or veggie of choice (again, make sure the flavors go well with creamy cheese or else, bad times)

2 tbsp minced garlic

½ – 1 cup diced onions (adjust amount depending on how strong your onions are. You can also just use onion powder and measure with your heart. Or leave it out completely, again, not your mom.)

Salt to taste

Black pepper to taste

Basil (fresh is better but dried has stronger, more concentrated flavor)

Thyme (see above)

Now on to the actual cooking.

Cook pasta according to box instructions. As you’re draining the pasta, set aside like a cup or two of the pasta water (this is a surprise tool we’ll use later)

I usually steam the veggies in the microwave because I always fuckin’ forget about it until the end. It will definitely be twenty times better if you cook up the protein and then throw the veg in and put in some salt or butter or other spices and cook it all that way (cook the meat first or else you’ll over cook the veggies and then they’ll be bleh). If you have an instant pot, cook up the meat and then throw the veg in for like two minutes.

 Also if your protein has a lot of grease after it’s done cooking you’re going to want to drain most of that off (not all of it, that’s were a lot of the flavor will be) (DO NOT pour it down the sink. Pour it into a can or jar and throw it away when it cools, or keep it to flavor stuff later). If you go the instant pot route, you can cook the meat with a cup or so of whatever broth and then add cornstarch and boom, you’ve got gravy for something else (you can freeze it).

For the sauce, first make a roux with the butter and flour (shh, shh, it’s okay I know the fancy Fr*nch word is scary but it’s literally the easiest thing to do and it’s necessary to make the cheese and milk mix together)

Melt butter in a sauce pan (you are gonna want a big pan trust me) on medium heat, pour in the flour and whisk until bubbly. If you don’t have a whisk you can use a fork but if you are using a non-stick pan foR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS CHEESEY DO NOT USE A METAL ONE.

That’s literally it, you just learned how to make a roux, go impress your friends and family.

Pour in heavy cream and milk and whisk together. Stir often until sauce is on the verge of boiling.

Now, I want you to look at me.

This is very Important.

The roux will collect at the bottom of the pan and it WILL BURN if it sits for even two minutes. Stir that shit almost constantly.

Mix in that mother fukin’ cheese small amounts at a time until it’s all melty. It will now be too thick to stir with a whisk unless you’re not a coward. But also don’t break your whisk.

Mix in salt, pepper, basil, and thyme and whatever other spices you want. Measure with your heart and your taste buds. Again, keep stirring because it will burn, and the oils in the cheese will try to separate. Don’t let either happen.

Once sauce is all mixed and melty pour into the pasta and stir in protein and veggies. Simmer for a few minutes to get all the flavors mixy. If you have a ton of sauce in comparison to everything else, just add more veggies and/or protein. If you ended up with too little, then pour in that leftover pasta water until it hits the consistency you want (this works with all types of sauces, the water is also good for plants so if you don’t use it all, treat your house plants)

Congrats, you now have lunch and dinner for like a week. You’re welcome.

Tips: You can buy minced garlic at the grocery stores and it’s literally so easy and will keep for months. This is a god send if you like to make most of your food completely vampire proof like me. You can also buy pre-cooked meat. Angelic choir begins singing

Remember kids, safe-to-eat temp for poultry is 165 degrees fahrenheit or 74 degrees celsius, and for beef and pork it’s 145 degrees F or 63 degrees C. Tofu people you’re on your own, sorry.

[601billionlazer]

I hope my parents never buy us food ever again

Okay, so I live in a pretty populated house, I live with my parents, my older sibling, their partner, my younger brother, and two youngest siblings (I also live with my cat but she is irrelevant to this rant.) So the house is pretty crowded so as you can imagine meals are expensive. Often, my parents will just buy shit in bulk from costco like Cup of Noodle and Kraft Mac & Cheese. And I’m talkin’ that blue box shit, none of that microwave cup bs. So often they’ll make us dinner or ask one of the oldest in the house to make dinner for everyone in their place. If nobody is able to, we often find ourselves getting takeout. Takeouts expensive as fuck for a house of 8 as you could imagine, so that option is usually reserved for if not everyone in the house will be joining us for a meal. If nobody is making dinner, and we aren’t getting takeout, THAT is precisely what the ramen and mac are for.

I know I rambled on for a bit there about pointless shit, but the tl;dr is my parents buy a lot of foods in bulk, typically shit you can just microwave or add hot water or throw in an air fryer and eat hassle free. On nights where we resort to these meals and don’t eat as a family, we refer to as “every man for himself” nights and they happen more often than you might think, especially in the fall when everyones busy with school and work. For some reason I can’t explain, I always make it a personal challenge upon myself to finish these bulk foods as soon as possible—even if the food is ass. So for a week straight I’ll have Cup of Noodles for lunch every day, I’ll make myself two boxes of Mac at a time, I’ll airfry some chicken nuggets and put them all a sandwich with lettuce and mayo, pizza bagels in the blender, I’m fucking gross bro but I HAVE to get through these meals. I want those crates empty. Why do I do this? I don’t really know, I guess it’s just the completionism mindset that makes seeing an empty crate once filled with sodium rich pre-cooked noodles feel so cathartic. I especially feel this way with breakfast cereals. My parents buy us breakfast cereal all the time, but NOBODY eats cereal in this house, especially not the fucking lucky charms and raisin bran and cinnamon toast crunch my folks keep nabbing. So I take it upon myself to have a bowl every morning until the cereal is gone, because I don’t wanna see the cereal they bought go to waste.

Y’all are probably imagining my homer simpson ass as a big lookin amorphous blob of microwave food, and that’s fine, I wouldn’t call myself fat but I’m certainly unhealthy as fuck I probably have a couple months left to live after the way I’ve been eating. The constant exposure to giant crates of empty calories and the allure of eating meals feeling like ticking off boxes on a list may be enabling these habits. But that is NOT the reason my parents need to stop buying food, oh no no no dear reader. The REAL reason my parents must never let a mere crumb of food enter this house ever again is because of the overwhelming crushing feeling of defeat I feel when I’m about to get to the last box of mac and cheese and suddenly the pantry has been restocked. The biggest problem here is some of the foods nobody in the house even fucking likes, like the cereal I mentioned earlier, I am quite literally ONLY eating it to get rid of it. But my parents will see this and thing “Huh, the frosted flakes are nearly empty! Our kids must love frosted flakes!” AND BUY LIKE 4 BOXES IN BULK AT COSTCO. IN MY ATTEMPT TO NOT BE WASTEFUL WITH THE CEREAL, I ONLY WOUND UP POURING GASOLINE ON THE PROBLEM. Honestly, the more I write about this the more I realize it’s just about cereal. Like the same thing happens with the soups and macs, but at least I’m not the only one who eats that shit. With the cereal though, I’m suffering through bowl after bowl of special k. Sometimes at 2 in the morning my sibling will come out of their room for a bowl of cocoa pebbles and we’ll sit and talk while we eat cereal together. It’s fun but they can’t have anything with gluten and it’s not like they know I’ve made this habit for myself. So the moral of the story is make me a salad, I should probably go on a diet.

[trvelyans-archive]

i am on my hands and knees begging for u to tell me about lila and margot 🙏

jasmine.............. thank you for this gift

under the cut because i expect it’ll get very long <3 :) update after i finished writing: it is, in fact, very long and also took me over an hour. so. take that as whatever sort of warning you might want.

let’s start with margot !

she was born to a couple of really young parents who..... did not want to be parents. at all. they were still in the party-and-get-drunk phase of their life and didn’t want to have a kid to worry about, so a large part of her childhood was spent couch surfing between relatives, mostly her grandfather.

they were really close! he would help her with her homework, they would cook together, he would let her drink underage so that she was well-versed in beer by the time she was like. idk. 16 lol. but she felt closer to him than her own parents, who were good when they were around but. they mostly weren’t around <3

when she was 19, her grandpa starting showing pretty serious signs of memory loss and whatnot and eventually had to be moved into a home. she was living with him by that point, so she had to continue to spend a year or so of her adult life couchsurfing. it didn’t help that she was in school full-time to get an engineering degree of. some kind. i think mechanical engineering. idk. and didn’t have a job, so to pay back her roommates she took up a majority of the housework as well as picked up odd jobs on the weekend. her grandpa’s health continued to decline through this time so she didn’t actually mind being busy because then she. didn’t have to think about it at all <3

and then.............. when she was 20......... her boyfriend of a year  suggested that she not only move in with him but that they get married and margot, who has never had stability ever in her life, jumped at the opportunity !

after she graduated, she found it incredibly hard to find a career (even though they were in the same program and He had no trouble finding one), so she was back to not working but her husband didn’t mind and he supported her whole-heartedly. during this time she started running and then eventually started going to a gym with a couple of her female friends from their neighbourhood! she would also spend a lot of time at her grandpa’s but his health was still rapidly declining. eventually her now-husband said that she should probably stop visiting him and margot was like “.... ok i guess”

And then. :)

she kept spending time outside of the house and started taking self-defense classes with a few of her friends and her husband was started to get very antsy. he wanted her to be at home, told her that he didn’t like her going out at night or, eventually, at all, and would find ways to keep her home every night so she didn’t go out. during this time he also started getting. um. very manipulative. he was easily triggered into starting arguments. so she increased the frequency of her self-defense classes and, eventually, they became Very Useful in an argument with her husband. so. we hate him :)

after that she filed for a divorce, moved away and changed her name to her late grandmother’s last name. she started working at a gym in her new town and eventually decided to open her own ! she had gotten the building about 2-3 weeks before the outbreak hit and didn’t have any furniture or equipment of any kind, so she met up with 2 middle-aged women from her old gym and they travelled together until one of them was bitten in a fight with walkers and dragged into a big crowd of them to be eaten and the other one was bitten and margot had to shoot her when she got zombified and tried to attack. :(

that’s where i have left off for now but i am going to develop her More the more i watch the show !!!

okay. backstory over. now for the fun bits:

her faceclaim is mackenzie davis specifically in terminator (without the. lines on her arms and whatever idk what those are) and this picture is the most margot-vibe imaginable.

the haircut was an incredibly recent choice but it came in handy during the outbreak because she didn’t have to worry about keeping hair out of her face. girlboss !

she is 6′2 :) her and her husband were funnily enough the 2 tallest people in her graduating class

she spoke occasionally to her parents after graduating and moving away but they fell out of touch a year or so before the outbreak began and she......................... unsurprisingly doesn’t miss them at all

she has 1 keepsake and it’s an old keychain of her grandpa’s and if anything happens to it. she will kill everyone in any room and Then herself !!!

she likes to where tank tops to show off her big arms. is this very ergonomical in the apocalypse where zombie bites can kill you instantly ? nope! will she do it anyway to intimidate people ? yup!

she Cannot cook. at all. she lived off of take-out and microwavable meals for the first 20 years of her life and then she always had someone else making food for her until she moved away on her own when it was back to takeout.

on the topic of food :) her fave foods are mac and cheese with breadcrumbs and meatlover’s pizza !

she will do literally anything for a good beer. anything. she keeps an eye out for them every time she goes scavenging in buildings and will try to get at least 1 bottle per trip. girlboss !

she cannot sing. in fact she’s not just average, she’s Terrible. she can, however, play mad guitar because her grandpa taught her.

now onto miss lila :)

she was born in a town a couple over from rick’s and was the younger sister of 2 ! she had a really great family and a very very happy childhood :) her dad was a wildlife rehabilitator and her mom was a landscaper who took a lot of pride in their nice big backyard and garden and Land where they. you know. rehabiliated the wildlife and what not

she worked a lot with her dad and mom at their wildlife centre and also helped her mom garden a lot (their house was on the same property as the centre so it was a nice big plot of land). she took a lot of interest in rehabilitating animals and it sparked a very early childhood interest in Caring for things (namely little wild critters) which extended to her helping out little kids on the playground when they got scraped knees and things. she always had a package of bandaids in her backpack from second grade on. an angel <3

in her final year of high school she had a very quick fling with a boy from her high school that ended… poorly. and then she got pregnant! which she. Did not expect. nor want. nor need in her life because she was planning on moving to atlanta to go to medical school and kickstart her career. her sister, who had recently dropped out of school and lost her job, decided to Take One for the team and claim the baby as hers so lila could go to medical school and stuff. their parents promised to take good care of her and they all made a plan to hide lila’s pregnancy from their town (although i’m sure literally everyone knows anyway) and then she moved away in the summer after giving birth to go to school

she quickly finished up her nursing program but was out of job for a few years until she got a job offer to be the nurse at king county elementary school aka the school were one Carl Grimes goes to school. she moved there in may and one night, when her car Squealed to a stop in front of a dog who had run away from his home and was being chased by. Um. a certain sheriff’s deputy who was intending on bringing the puppy back home <3 they got to talking and. Well. the rest is history…..

she was a very beloved member of the staff and kids would often fake sick just to come to her office and get a sucker and she grew esp close to the grimes family :D after a couple of years living in king county she got a job to start working at some fancy prep school in atlanta and decided that actually she might want to. You know. start being a mom now that she was finished with school and had a career. so she moved away from king county at the end of the next school year and was unfortunately in atlanta when it was bombed by the government at the start of the outbreak so she and her daughter and sister all died :) and that’s that !

some fun facts because that was a very depressing end to her story:

she always has suckers in her office at school and her favourites are the watermelon ones.

she can often be found gardening in her backyard or watching the birds in the trees like a little nature baby !!!

she is very meticulous about planning. she Does have a daily agenda. she Will kill you if you touch it. shane likes to leave her little notes in it for her to find when she’s at school. sometimes they are not Just cute. she usually erases those.

she likes collecting ugly thrift store paintings of animals and hangs them up in her dining room and she Does think they are incredibly funny.

she is a vegetarian !!! very unwavering about it. shane finds it annoying because he’s good at cooking steak but she just has a salad and then they’re both perfectly happy <3

sends basically everyone she knows a Christmas/holiday card every year. even the teachers at the elementary school who don’t like her and or barely talk to her !!!

she is a terrible maker of tea and usually forgets about cups before she’s even halfway through them (thank god for her). makes everyone tea when they come over except shane (stupid ass) because he doesn’t like it and usually people just politely swallow it even though it’s too steeped or. sorry idk how tea works. she just Makes It Bad ok

she perpetually forgets to do laundry. Most of her non-scrubs have dirt stains or dressing stains or whatnot (except for her Really nice clothes) which is why she tries to buy a lot of patterns. makes things easier to hide <3

and that’s it for now !!! i have so much other lore for them but i will stop here for now :) thank you very much if you read this also i’m very sorry i have twd brainworms i cannot help it. anyway ok that’s it thanks love you bye

[rueren]

jjk gas station order

***

nav 

***

jujutsu tech boys are on a road trip.  what are they getting ?

Itadori

extra mf large slushy

it’s purple but he swirled red and blue together

this bitch bought a monster and threw it in there too omfgg

if fushiguro wont let him, he’ll probably just get a shit ton of koolaids and a mountain dew.  put all the koolaids into some travel water bottle

but he’ll sneak some of those tiny energy shot bottles and get like 4 of them and dump them into his cup

spicy cheetos. flaming hot sweet chilli specifically 

if thats not there then he gets jalapeño cheetos 

sukuna wants purple takis tho

fuzzy peaches or swedish berries

ooooo he loves skittles. he’s fine with the regular red but he also likes purple

twinkies omg so many twinkies 

smarties awh this is cute

Fushiguro

strawberry flavored drinks 

like of any kind 

if not that then he gets powerade.  hes wierd and prefers powerade over gatorade 

gets the red one so its half decent

with the cap that you gotta suck

those tiny powdered donut balls

you know what i’m taking about

those donut circles/bites (over here we call them timbits)

he likes maltesers (bless him)

snickers

he also strikes me as a skors person??? he likes the crunch

sour cream and onion pringles 

starbust minis

those brownies with the rainbow sprinkles.  little debbies. itadori steals one but will never admit it 

gojo caught him and made him split it with him, as payment for his silence

Gojo

nasty mf i love him

he gets those hotdogs that have just been rolling n rolling in the glass thingy

also taquitos 

also gets like 3 of them

alternatively this bastard buys like 3 packs of instant mac n cheese and immediately walks his ass over to the back of the store where they got a microwave and literally makes if before he leaves the store

jerky stick things. idfk what they’re called but i know u kno what i’m talking about, in those vacuum sealed wrappings

gets the sweetest drink that they have it literally does not matter which one. if he can feel his teeth rotting from the first sip, hes taking it

also he buys literal battery acid energy drinks and just downs them in 5 seconds flat

sour keys

GREEN SKITTLES

those 2 for $1 lollipops. gets a red one and a random other color one

he gives itadori the other one

Nanami

black coffee

plain donut

coffee crisp

reeses pieces

one of those sandwiches with plastic wrap that looks a lil suspicious

but he took it from the back bc the front ones probably had someone touch them already

m&m’s but specifically the peanuts ones 

like those really big bags or just a bunch of small ones

also hell just eat peanuts by themselves

he does that dad thing where you shake your hand with the nuts in them and then aggressively toss some in your mouth. 

regular lays chips  

or white cheddar popcorn. (king status, really)

oh also those enormous water jugs.  stay hydrated kids 

[snowdice]

Road Trips and Missing Persons (Part 24)

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Patton & Virgil, Virgil & Janus, Logan & Patton, Emile & Remy, Roman & Remus & Janus

Characters: Patton, Virgil, Janus, Remus, Roman, Logan, Emile, Remy

Summary: Patton was just getting groceries. The next thing he knew, there was a knife at his throat and he was an unwilling uber driver. Virgil’s on the run after the murder of his dad, and it’s not just his paranoia that’s telling him he’s being chased down. He has to get somewhere safe, somewhere he can trust, and all he has is a couple of stories from his dad and a name: “Green Bellow Foods and Dispensary.”

Meanwhile, everyone else is trying to find a missing 15 year old, all with different pieces of the puzzle about where he is. It really is too bad that no one is answering their phones.

Notes: Secret Agents AU, knives, carjacking, kidnapping, murder mentioned, guns mentioned, pepper spray, blood mentioned, drugs mentioned, explosions, car crashes (more to be added)

This is a fic I’ve been writing on study breaks that you have probably all already seen at this point. I’ve affectionately named it the Goblin Brain Fic because it’s helping my brain actually get motivated for studying. I’ve slightly edited it for wording and grammar, but not for content from my previous posts. Feel free to send in asks to direct it because I’m not 100% sure where this is going and you can help decide if you feel so inclined! You can see the process I went through to build this at this link.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 My Master Post

Logan had kept them in the meeting room for literal hours, pausing only to feed everyone except Patton and Virgil (who had actually eaten dinner). Eventually, he decided that he was satisfied with the explanations (Well, no, perhaps not satisfied, he was still very displeased with everyone except Virgil and maybe Emile, though Emile had not helped himself when he’d realized that he’d spoken both to Patton and Remus in the grocery store near Remy’s house early and he and Patton had proceeded to go off on a tangent about pasta.) and had taken them all to some of the hotel style rooms in the base.

The room Remy, Emile, Janus, and Virgil were in had two double beds. Virgil and Janus had claimed one of the beds already and were currently curled up together on it both asleep. Janus had apparently picked up Virgil’s stuffed spider from home and stuck it in his pocket. He had ordered Remy to dry the slightly damp toy with a hair dryer before consenting to laying down. The two of them had fallen asleep easily after their long days, the stuffed spider laying on the top of Janus’s chest and Virgil’s arm thrown around him loosely.

Emile had stayed up longer and taken a shower before emailing his receptionist asking her to cancel all of his appointments for tomorrow (or today as it was by now). He’d climbed into bed a couple of minutes ago, leaving Remy the only conscious one in the room.

Virgil stirred awake as Remy stood up from the chair he’d been sitting on and stepped towards the door. “Dad?” he asked.

Remy took a detour to stand by his bedside and stroke a few of the curls that were still damp from his shower away from his face. “Go back to sleep, kid.”

“Where’re you going?” he asked.

“Just gonna go grab some coffee,” he said.

“It’s night,” he pointed out.

Remy cracked a grin. “Yeah, well, you know me.” He tapped him on the nose. “I’ll be right in the mini kitchen outside.”

“Kay,” Virgil agreed, laying his head back on Janus’s chest. Janus never stirred, dead to the world in the way he only ever was when Virgil was snuggled up against him.

Remy closed the door quietly behind himself and wandered over towards the kitchen.

“Can’t sleep?” Patton asked when he stepped into the little area. The man was sitting at the small two-person table with a mug of what looked like tea and a box of Oreos.

“Having trouble chilling out,” Remy replied. “You know how it is.” Patton hummed in acknowledgement as Remy investigated the coffee maker.

“You know,” Patton said amused. “If your trying to calm down and sleep, coffee may not be the best solution.”

“Babe, do you know me at all?” Remy asked. Patton just shook his head.

“Besides,” Remy continued. “Who said I was planning on sleeping any time soon?”

“You should try to sleep,” Patton said, frown clear in his tone even though Remy was turned away, putting coffee grounds into the machine.

“Says the man already out here eating cookies at half past 1.”

“Touché.”

They were silent until Remy’s coffee was finished. Remy poured himself a cup and went to sit across from him. “Thanks for not shanking the little bastard on sight.”

Patton’s nose scrunched. “I should have known he was yours with that mouth of his,” Patton said, then he shook his head. “He’s a cute kid.”

“He held a knife to your neck.”

Patton shrugged. “It’s not the first time I befriended someone with a deadly weapon on me,” he said. He pushed the packet of Oreos over to him. “I hope you realize I’m filing for joint custody.”

Remy laughed. “I figured after I heard you spent over 3 hours in a car with him.”

“I’m going to teach him how not to curse and why falling asleep during a kidnapping is not ideal.”

“Well, Emile’s already tried his hardest on the first front, so good luck, and the boy likes to nap at inopportune times, what can I say?”

“Takes after his dad.”

“I am both insulted and flattered simultaneously.”

Patton giggled softly.

“But, seriously,” Remy said. “I do owe you for making sure Virgil was okay even if you didn’t know he was my spawn.”

Patton shrugged. “You don’t owe me anything.” He paused. “Well, you could buy me some cheese since I’d just bought a bunch to make mac and cheese, and it all went bad during the long car ride.”

Remy snorted. “Why do the lactose intolerant fear no god?” he asked. “But, sure, I’ll be happy to reimburse you and endorse your hedonistic ways.”

Patton smiled at him and finished off his tea.

 Despite his suggestion that Remy head to bed a few minutes before, he did not put his mug in the sink, but filled it back up with water and popped it into the microwave. Remy turned back to his coffee for a moment and immediately felt arms come around him. “Thanks for not being dead,” Patton said into his ear.

Remy chuckled and patted his arm. “You’re welcome Patty, but really what did everyone expect? I’ve got a couple of kids to raise still.”

Patton just hummed and kept hugging him until the microwave beeped. He grabbed his mug then and plopped another tea bag into it.

“So, not what you planned for your weekend, huh?” Remy asked.

Patton shook his head sitting back down. “I was going to make the mac and cheese and watch reruns of Parks and Rec,” he said wistfully. Then he grinned. “I probably would have still been awake at this hour anyway.”

“Oh, Pat. How many times have you watched that show?”

Patton just smiled at him, eyes sparkling. “We really should try to get some sleep,” Patton said.

“Yeah, well, Emmy snores.”

“And Lo kicks,” Patton said, “when he’s not trying to crush me. Not that trying to sleep in the same bed as one of the twins is any better.”

Remy snorted. “Didn’t take Logan for a cuddling type.”

“Oh, he always tries to deny it, but he’s a big softie.”

“Explains why I’m not dead all over again.”

“Hmmm,” Patton agreed. Then he grinned. “I have the Netflix app on my phone,” he divulged.

“…We’re starting with season 3.”

“Of course,” Patton agreed, pulling out his phone.

They got yelled at in the morning by Logan for falling asleep at the table.

The end! Except for the epilogue.

[thesearchforbluejello]

5 and 9 for the ship headcanon meme, Will/Frankie

Okay, so this ask is so old it probably has its driver's license by now, but the questions were 5) Who says "I love you" first, and 9) What's the most embarassing thing they've done in front of each other?

(credit goes to @tyrsenian for the fire alarm idea, and to listening to me complain about having no ideas.)

5. Hoo, I have a lot of thoughts about this one. It's Will, of course. At least, it's Will that says those three words first. But Frankie is really the one to say it first, just not in so many words. She says it when she makes him coffee the way he likes. She says it when she lets him sleep with his head on her shoulder on the plane. She says it when she lets him steal her granola bars and make her watch James Bond and stupid romcoms and critique her choices of wine. Her face says it loud whenever she looks at him, but it takes her a long time to say it clear.

There's a hundred ways it could've happened. Blood and smoke and fear that time is running short, but that wasn't how it went.

When Will says it for the first time, it's burning on the tip of his tongue like it has a few times before. It's a small moment; they've stopped at a gas station and when Frankie comes out, she's brought him M&Ms. He'd been telling Susan a few days before, just mindless chatter, that he hadn't had M&Ms in so long. He hadn't even known Frankie was listening. This time, Will doesn't hold the words back. "I love you," he says.

It comes with a caveat. "You don't need to say anything," he adds. "I just wanted to make sure you know."

Frankie doesn't smile, but some of the shock fades from her face and she nods. Then, when she's merged them back onto the highway, she takes his hand.

When Frankie says it for the first time, it's a quiet moment. They're watching a hockey game on TV that neither of them are particularly invested in. Will is laying between her legs with his calves over the arm of the couch, his head on her shoulder and her arms around him. He's running the tips of his fingers over her knuckles and the motion of it is threatening to put her to sleep.

"That was a cross check," Will mumbles drowsily.

"I love you," Frankie says.

Will jerks awake and turns over in her arms so he's propped on his elbows.

"Yeah?" he asks with that smile that twists her up inside.

"Yeah," she says.

She has to lean down so he can kiss her. It's awkward and it's perfect.

9. Pt. 1

"Hey, Frankie?"

"What," she grouses as she squeezes toothpaste from the tube.

"Why is Love, Actually on your recently watched list?" Will asks.

The blob of toothpaste falls off the bristles and into the sink. "It's not," she says quickly.

"Well, no one else on this team is named Frankie, so you're clearly logged in."

"No I'm not."

"I do know how to read, you know."

"Well, you're certainly old enough to have learned by now," she quips.

"Oh my god, and You've Got Mail?! You told me you didn't like it."

"I didn't. I hated it."

"Not according to your Netflix history."

"It's a mistake," she says around her toothbrush.

"I feel like someone should owe me money. Like I should've made a bet on this."

Frankie dries her hands and leans out the door. "Will, if you ever make a bet based on any of my personal habits, I'd just like to remind you that there is still paperwork filed with my agency granting me permission to kill you, free and clear."

Will looks up from the tablet, entirely unfazed. "So you admit it isn't a mistake."

"I didn't say that; it's totally a mistake." She kneels on the edge of the bed beside him and reaches for the tablet.

"Nope," he says, altogether too smug. He jerks the tablet away and wraps an arm around her shoulders, hooks a knee over her hip, and uses the leverage he has to roll her over him and deposit her on her back beside him. She just huffs. "It's definitely not a mistake," he says happily as he leans back against the pillows again.

"At least let me choose something," Frankie says, holding her hand out expectantly.

"Fine."

She takes the tablet, and a moment later hands it back. Will looks blankly at the sign-in screen.

"I thought you were choosing something?"

"Yeah," she says, "I'm choosing to not let you look at my Netflix history."

"You're embarrassed!"

"I'm not embarrassed," she says without looking at him.

"You definitely are."

She turns her head to look him in the eye. "Kill order, Will."

"Okay, okay. You're definitely not embarrassed by this at all, not even a little bit. Sure. But this means you've forfeited your right to pick tonight. And now I want to watch You've Got Mail."

"Will, no," she whines.

"Oh, yes. Now that I know you like it, we can watch it all the time."

"I hate you," she grouses as she moves a little closer to see the screen.

"I know," Will says with a smile.

9. Pt. 2

Frankie's hand on his knee is the only thing keeping him together. The sirens are off, at least, but the flashing lights on the trucks are just worsening his headache.

"It's okay, Will," Frankie insists beside him.

"It's not," he groans.

She's been all but pasted to his side since they ended up out here, her shoulder against his, her leg against his from hip to ankle. He appreciates the attempt at comfort, even if it does little to actually make him feel better.

"It's not like this kind of thing never happens," Frankie says.

"It hasn't since I lived here."

"Well you guys are lucky, then," she laughs.

"Not anymore," he mutters.

"Come on," Frankie protests. "It's not that big of a deal. Everything is fine. We're just going to have to, you know, clean."

"Everyone probably hates me."

Frankie looks around at the very unhappy group of residents milling about, casting irritated glances at their building and the fire trucks across the street. "I wouldn't necessarily say you're their favorite person right now," she says, "but that won't last long. It's, like, impossible to stay mad at you."

"Even for you?" he teases.

"Well, I have a lot of practice. But don't think I'm not going to use this to my advantage when convenient."

Will groans and leans his head on her shoulder.

"The building is clear; you can return to your apartments," one of the firefighters announces through a bullhorn.

The crowd of residents mutters a chorus of "thank god" and "finally" and begin filtering back inside.

"Will Chase," the firefighter with the bullhorn says as he motions for Will to cross the street

"Oh God," Will moans.

"It's okay," Frankie says. "It's fine."

"It's not," he moans again.

"Come on, I'll come with you."

"You don't have to."

"I'm your partner. I go with you into danger all the time."

"That doesn't make me feel better," Will says, but when Frankie smiles, he does feel a little better. "I think I just want to talk to him alone," he says.

"Okay. I'll be right back, then."

"Wait, where are you going?" he asks as she turns down the street.

"Don't worry about it," she says with a smile.

"At least take this," he says, shrugging out of his jacket and throwing it at her before she can decline the offer again.

"Fine," she huffs, pulling it over her sweatshirt.

The firefighter wastes no time when Will finally makes it across the street. "Your oven is a mess, but there's no lasting damage, luckily. What was it?"

"Frozen pizza."

"Frozen pizza doesn't do that."

Will frowns. "It does if you leave the cardboard under it, apparently."

"Yeah, that'd do it."

"I travel a lot, for work, and I'm just really jetlagged; I can't believe I did that."

"Well, don't do it again," the firefighter says, ignoring Will's embarrassment. "You wouldn't believe the stuff we see, though. This is nothing."

"Yeah," Will says, unconvinced.

"Go get some sleep," the firefighter laughs.

Will ends up trudging up the stairs after most of the other residents of his building have already gone back to bed. He's staring hopelessly at the charred mess in his oven when Frankie knocks on the door. The only thing he's managed to accomplish was standing the spent fire extinguisher back up.

"I forgot my keys," Frankie says when he opens the door.

"Where did you go?"

"To get dinner," she says. "Go sit down. I don't think I trust you to cook right now."

"Oh, you're hilarious."

"We can clean this up tomorrow."

"How are you not as tired as I am," he mutters as he moves to sit on the couch.

"Well, I was, but the fire alarm going off did a pretty good job of waking me up."

"Funny," Will says flatly.

"Not really."

Will wakes to his foot being nudged.

"Here." Frankie hands him a microwaved mac and cheese cup. "Cheers." She taps hers against his. "And this is for your headache," she says as she hands him a bottle of ibuprofen, "because I finished what you had in the bathroom when I was here last week and I wasn't sure if you'd had the chance to buy more."

"Thank you," Will says as she sits down.

"You're welcome. But it's almost three a.m. now and I'm not going home. And I'm also not sleeping on your couch after that flight, so you're sharing your bed."

Will laughs. "Okay."

[emospritelet]

Twisted Fate prompt 78) “I love you.” “You shouldn’t.”

These prompts have been sitting in my inbox since last August XD. I’m sorry, it took ages for these two to actually start talking about their issues.

[AO3]

x

Belle had known that a broken arm would be tricky to manage, but she hadn’t realised how helpless she was without Gold around to assist her. Getting dressed was the first obstacle, and she struggled to get out of her nightdress and into her underwear. She discarded any thought of attempting to put on a bra, and after weighing her options, decided on simple sweatpants, a camisole and cardigan. Even brushing her hair with her left hand took some getting used to.

He had left early, so quietly that she hadn’t heard him go, but when she entered the kitchen she found the coffee maker ready to go with decaf, the lid off the tea canister and cooked sliced mushrooms and onions alongside a plate of grated cheese and a bowl containing beaten eggs. The makings of an omelette. It made her smile.

She managed to make the omelette, although it wasn’t about to win any prizes for looks by the time it was on her plate, and ate it at the table with some tea, following it up with decaf coffee and one of the oat and raisin cookies he had made the previous day. Checking the fridge made her smile again; he had portioned up the food he had cooked, glass dishes containing macaroni cheese all ready to go in the oven and beef in red wine in plastic tubs ready for the microwave or to be tipped into a pan.

She spent her day reading and relaxing, rubbing her belly whenever the baby kicked. It was starting to get more uncomfortable the closer she got to her due date. She tried to look ahead six months, when the baby was on the outside, crawling around the apartment. Would Gold still be there? Probably not; she imagined he would move into his own place as soon as her arm was healed, seeing the baby according to the terms in the thick sheaf of documents that she had still not signed. The thought made her feel incredibly lonely.

Emma popped in to see her at lunchtime only briefly, staying for a cup of cocoa and helping her to tie up her hair. She promised to return after class with Neal and Henry, and so by six-thirty they were all seated around the kitchen table, eating their way through Gold’s macaroni cheese.

“This is so good,” said Henry, scraping his plate. “It’s got about a ton of cheese in it. Mom, you should make it like this next time.”

“Thanks,” said Emma dryly. “I thought you liked my mac and cheese.”

“I do, but you always say ‘is that enough cheese’ and I feel like I have to say yes, and it never is.”

“Wow - thanks for the honesty, I guess,” remarked Emma, taking a drink of her wine. Belle and Neal chuckled.

“You can tell Gold it was a hit,” added Neal, digging a fork into his own food. “It’s comforting. Kinda tastes like home, you know?”

“He’s an annoyingly good cook,” said Belle, in a flat tone.

“Why, that sneaky son of a—” Neal glanced at Henry. “Uh - well, you know what I mean. Belle, somehow I doubt it’s all part of an evil scheme. Maybe he just thinks you need to eat some good food.”

“Yeah, I know I sound unreasonable,” she sighed. “I don’t know where my brain’s at right now. This morning I was wondering how the hell I’d cope on my own, and - and that maybe I’ll miss him when he’s not here and it’s just me and the baby. It’s - it’s like I resent the fact that he’s stepping up, and I don’t really understand it. I don’t know, maybe I’m just being emotional.”

She poked at her food, feeling despondent.

“You resent that he’s making you feel things?” said Emma, with a knowing look in her eyes, and Belle pulled a face.

“Maybe.”

“Can’t be angry with him anymore, and you still feel like you should be?”

Belle put down her fork.

“Okay, did you take psych class today or something?”

Emma put a hand over hers, grinning.

“I get it, that’s all,” she said. “Don’t get too hung up on what you think you should be feeling. Do whatever’s best for making you happy.”

Belle thought about that for a moment.

“I’m not sure what that is,” she said eventually, and Emma shrugged.

“Give it time.”

There was silence except for the scraping of plates while they finished up, and Neal offered to wash up. Dessert was ice cream, brought by Emma, and Henry went to eat his in front of the TV while Neal dried the dishes and Emma finished her wine.

“Do either of you want coffee?” asked Belle. “You’ll probably have to help me make it, but you’re welcome.”

“I could use one,” said Neal, over his shoulder. “Let me make it. You want one?”

“I’ll have tea. Peppermint, I think. The baby’s been kicking so much today it gives me heartburn.” 

He dried his hands, and Belle pushed back her chair to go to the bathroom. When she got back the coffee maker was running, and Neal had taken Gold’s old toy rabbit from its place on the shelf beside the fridge. He had a puzzled look on his face as he turned the rabbit over and over in his hands, and Belle was reminded of Gold, and the way he had studied it.

“Where’d you get this?” he asked.

“Oh, it belongs to Alex,” she said. “It’s not for the baby, or anything. It belonged to his son.”

Neal looked up.

“He had a kid?”

“Still does, apparently,” said Belle. “They kind of lost touch.”

“How long ago?” asked Emma.

“I think he said his son was two. It was years ago. I’m - I’m not sure how much he really wants me to talk about it. If at all.”

“Oh. Okay.” Emma looked thoughtful. “But he talked to you about it. That’s good, right?”

“Yeah.” Belle took her seat. “He brought the rabbit with him when he moved in, and although I’d seen it before in his shop, I hadn’t thought anything of it. So I asked him. He was - he was probably the most open he’s been with me. I think it made him uncomfortable.”

“Well, practice makes perfect.”

“Yeah.” Belle reached for her peppermint tea. “Here’s hoping for more of that.”

“Does it make you feel better about how he’ll be with the baby?” asked Neal. “I’m not prying into the guy’s private business, but maybe if he’s had a kid and you know that he loved that kid, it might make you feel a bit easier about this one, you know?”

Belle thought for a moment.

“Yeah, he definitely loves his son,” she said. “I could see it in his eyes. It was kind of heartbreaking, to be honest. So yes, I do think he’ll love our child. I - I think he already does.”

“Have you guys talked about how you’ll divide up caring for the baby?”

“No.” Belle ran her hands over her face, huffing air through her fingers. “He went to his lawyer. Drew up a huge document that I can’t face reading through and told me to get some legal advice.”

“He’s right to say that.”

“I know.” Belle sat back in her chair with a sigh. “I just - I just can’t at the moment. Every time I think about our lives being tied up in clauses and sub-clauses and stupid legal terms, I want to cry.”

Neal and Emma shared a glance.

“Well, I guess since he’s living with you at the moment, there’s no rush,” said Emma reasonably.

“Yeah, plenty of time to lawyer up when he moves out,” added Neal.

“Yeah.”

Belle picked up her tea, feeling subdued, and there was a moment of silence.

“Maybe we can make Fridays a thing,” suggested Emma. “He said he’d be in Maine every week, so we could come over and keep you company.”

“I don’t know if he’ll stick to Fridays.”

“He said he had an appointment to keep,” said Emma. “Said it would be every Friday.”

“An appointment?” Belle frowned. “He never mentioned it. I know he has rent to collect, but I thought he was getting someone to do that for him.”

“Huh. Well, it’s only a suggestion.”

“No, it’s a good one,” said Belle. “I’ll ask him what his plans are.”

“Sounds good.” Emma took a slurp of coffee. “Okay, who’s up for a game of cards? Loser buys dessert next week.”

x

Gold returned when it was almost ten, looking drained and tired, although he greeted her pleasantly. Belle found herself wanting to make him tea and feed him something, and felt a little useless when he insisted on seeing to himself. He made her chamomile tea, and regular tea for himself, along with a sandwich that he made short work of in the kitchen before bringing his tea through to the lounge. She was curled in a chair, a book tented on the arm as she sipped at her drink, and he lowered himself onto the couch, perching on the edge with his elbows resting on his knees, an aura of tension hanging around him.

“How was your day?” he asked. “Did you manage everything okay? Did your friends come over?”

“Yeah, it was fine,” she said. “Your mac and cheese was a hit, by the way. Henry thought it was awesome.”

He smiled faintly.

“Good.”

“We talked about making it a regular Friday night get-together,” she added. “But I wasn’t sure if we could, what with your work thing.”

“My work thing?” said Gold, looking confused.

“Emma said you had a regular appointment in Maine,” she prompted. “So I was wondering if that was gonna be every Friday or not.”

Gold hesitated only briefly.

“I can go every Friday, if that makes it easier for you to organise things.”

“Good.” She took a sip of her drink. “In that case I’ll ask them to come over for movies and popcorn. It’ll be nice to have some company.”

“Right,” he said. “Yes.”

“Which means the rest of the week, we have each other for company,” she said, keeping her tone light. “Which we should make the most of, don’t you think?”

His eyes narrowed a little.

“In what way?”

“I - I thought maybe we could talk some more,” she said. “I thought - well, the conversation we had the other night. I thought that was - useful.”

Gold held her gaze steadily for a moment, then looked away, elbows shifting on his knees, fingers threaded together.

“Yes,” he said. “Yes, it felt like - progress.”

She could sense his awkwardness, and felt the urge to reach out to him, to send him some sort of comfort, even as she battled with her own anxiety, her own hurt.

“So, we should talk,” she went on. “Clear the air. If you’re willing.”

There was a moment of silence, and his jaw tightened a little, his throat bobbing as he swallowed.

“Alright,” he said at last. 

Belle set down her tea, letting her feet slip to the floor as she sat forward a little, instinctively moving closer to him, bridging the space between them until their knees were almost touching. She could hear the light sound of him breathing through his nose, and the faintest scent of him was in the air, making her want to close her eyes and inhale deeply.

“I meant it,” she said softly. “What I said the other night, before the accident. I meant it. I love you.”

His mouth was set in a grim line, his eyes downcast as his head shook slightly: the barest denial.

“You shouldn’t.”

Belle sighed, sitting back.

“That’s not how this works,” she said. “That’s not how any of this works. You can’t just tell someone not to love you.”

He was silent, not looking at her, and she shook her head.

“I wanted to hate you, you know,” she admitted. “There were times when I feel like I wish I could hurt you like you hurt me, but I know that if I had the chance I wouldn’t do it.”

“Of course not,” he said quietly. “That’s not who you are.”

“Oh, I have my moments,” she said. “Pretty sure I’ve cursed you out a hundred times since we broke up.”

“Well, I imagine I deserved it.”

“Yeah.”

She looked at her hands, folded together in her lap, and there was a moment of silence. Glancing up, she could see that Gold’s attention was on the floor at his feet, the space between the toes of his shoes. She wondered what he was thinking.

“I was so hurt, for so long,” she said. “Devastated. And - and after that I got angry. Maybe I still am, I don’t know. I - I keep thinking irrational things, and I don’t always realise that I’m being unreasonable.”

“I don’t think you’re unreasonable,” he said, and took a deep breath. “You said you didn’t trust me. That - that stayed with me, Belle. I’ve thought about it a lot.”

“Oh.” She wasn’t sure how to feel about that. “Right.”

“There again, given what I did,” he went on. “I - ah - I don’t suppose I’ve given you much reason to.”

More silence, but somehow it was deafening, as though the space between them was screaming at her. She had to speak, to bridge the gap, to voice her pain.

“You know, that was the worst of it,” she said softly. “Not the things you said, so much, awful though they were. It was more that you felt you could say them. Maybe I’m not making sense, I don’t know…”

He looked up then, his eyes warm, filled with what might have been pain and regret.

“Tell me,” he said. “I need to hear it.”

Belle chewed her lip, trying to organise her thoughts.

“I thought I knew you,” she said. “You didn’t give me much to work with, don’t get me wrong, but the little I got made me think that you - cared - for me. And - and that was okay, because even though you never said it, I felt it. I knew.”

She paused, choosing her words. His mouth had twisted a little, pain etched in the lines around his eyes.

“I’ve always felt that I have a sense about people,” she said. “That I can see past the surface, see what’s inside. So when you did what you did, not only did I realise that I didn’t know you, but it was like I lost my sense of who I was, too.”

Gold nodded slowly.

“Like you couldn’t trust your instincts,” he said. “Couldn’t trust yourself.”

“I - I guess so.”

“Yes.” He dropped his eyes again so that he wasn’t quite looking at her, but at his fingers, laced together. “And that’s why you can’t trust me, either.”

“Uh…” She shifted uncomfortably. “Yeah.”

Gold nodded.

“I understand,” he whispered.

“I want to,” she added. “I want to trust you. I hate this - all of this - between us.” She gestured with a hand, back and forth. “I want it to be better. I do.”

Gold looked up again, smiling a little.

“So do I,” he said. “I’m trying, Belle. I - I know it might not feel like it, but I am.”

He dropped his eyes again, but she sensed he still had more to say, so she remained silent. Gold opened his mouth, looking a little pained.

“It - it wasn’t work,” he said hesitantly, and Belle frowned.

“What?”

“In Storybrooke,” he said. “I said I had to go there for work. That was only partly true. I can sort out the things I need to for my business remotely, I don’t need to go there.”

Belle blinked, surprised.

“Oh,” she said.

More silence. She held her tongue, waiting for him to fill it, and Gold took a breath, his brows lifting a little in the middle, giving him an anxious, somewhat helpless expression. 

“I’m going to Storybrooke each Friday because I have a regular appointment,” he said heavily. “To see Dr Hopper. For - for therapy.”

“Therapy?” Belle felt her eyes widen. “Really?”

“Really.”

He caught her eyes very briefly with his before ducking his head again. She wanted to smile, a sense of relief flooding through her. Finally. Finally he asked for help.

“How’s it going?” she asked, and he sighed, that helpless look briefly returning.

“Well, it’s early days,” he said. “It’s - it’s not easy. But there again nothing worthwhile is, so they say. I’m going to keep trying. He’s - I think he’s probably very good at his job.”

“Yeah.” Bless Dr Hopper. If anyone can help, he can. “Well, I’m proud of you.”

Gold looked up sharply, a stricken expression on his face, and she smiled warmly.

“I really am,” she said sincerely. “I’m proud of you. I know how hard it must be to ask for help. It - it makes me feel like you’re really serious about making things better.”

A flicker of a smile at the corners of his mouth.

“I am,” he said. “I promise.”

He held her gaze for a moment, that tiny smile making his eyes gleam. It reminded her of happier times, and there was a lurch deep in her belly at the memories. Gold eventually glanced away.

“We should go to bed,” he said, and threw up a hand as Belle raised her eyebrows. “Oh, I - I didn’t mean we should go to bed, although - okay I did mean that, but I didn’t mean together, I meant - I meant to sleep, that’s all. I meant – oh fuck it, I’ll shut up.”

He sighed, letting the hand drop, and Belle giggled a little, eyes sparkling.

“Sleep sounds good,” she said, and he smiled.

“Right,” he said. “Well.”

He pushed to his feet, grasping his cane and holding out a hand to pull her up. Belle swayed in his grip a little, smiling up at him.

“Goodnight, Alexander,” she said softly.

“Goodnight.”

She let her hand slip from his, picking up her tea and making her way towards the bedroom, feeling his eyes on her back. Slowly, very slowly, they were making progress.

[anyu-blue]

~

I'm just venting here cuz I don't have anyone to really vent to right now.

I know I'm being 'too much' and 'over the top' again... I know I'm throwing a hissy fit I don't need to, and I recognize I'm hurting at least one person with it.

But God damn I'm pissed and I guess I want to be pissed.

There's so much I want to do and so much I feel obligated to do and more... A lot of what I want to do... I just don't have the energy for. I wanted to make all these custom cards for my family since I should be able to ship stuff out this week... But I pulled Everything out and found... I just really didn't want to put that effort in..I mean I REALLY do... But just... Everything was turning out terrible. I'm honestly shocked I managed the 14 for my ex's family for Christmas... I want to do it... But at the same time I don't.

Cuz what's the point? All that effort.. all that care.. when I could just buy them a stupid card instead. So I'll go buy them a card... Because my eldest and younger sister decided to head to the grocery store without me and now I have to steal the car right when I'm off work to do my own necessary shopping anyway (or risk not being able to go at all this week). All because they were nearly out of toilet paper and Tevie wanted to get me cash for her car insurance bill...

Now I wouldn't be so mad except... They didn't even ask if I had extra toilet paper in my bathroom, which I do. AND I told Tevie that she didn't have to worry- I have enough to cover the insurance for her car.

But no. She just HAD to go today so I could have the money by tomorrow when it pulls!!! Um... Tomorrow (technically today, now) is SUNDAY. How the FUCK am I supposed to deposit the $ into my account like she wants when it's a freaking Sunday?! Or or at all when uh.. she has the car until like... 7pm every day anyway?!

Uuuugh... I already told her too, I'm not depositing Anything unless I absolutely need to either. Which I don't cuz I just got paid. AND I told her her insurance will be a part of what she pays me (if she does) for all her other bills!! If I got it I got it. What part of that is so hard to understand?

Apparently all of it...

Or none of it, but it doesn't matter because she doesn't pay attention to stuff like that anyway. Literally just does whatever she wants.. and you know what? I know that's absolutely fine. Sure it inconveniences me because, well, I needed to go to the store too (and told her as such), and had nothing for dinner while they fed themselves again (didn't even ask me AND used a service I have/can get free stuff with if they use my account like I've asked EVERY SINGLE TIME we've EVER used it!!!). (Why did I EVER cook and feed them so much? I was 100% right in that they have no interest in doing the same. They BARELY cook for themselves!! And you can probably already guess what I'm going to say about it... It's all JUNK!!! Cheeto mac and cheese, ramen, air fried chicken and fries, microwaved meals- you should see our pantry right now. Almost entirely instant meals and it makes me want to vomit. What's not instant is the stuff I picked out/ingredients that have just sat since I stopped cooking.. you should see our FRIDGE right now!! Not a vegetable or fruit in sight!! It's all warm fruit cups for Tevie and idek what W0lfie eats to get her vitamins and nutrients- cuz the vitamins I bought haven't been touched except for by me, Though I told them it would be a good idea of they took some each week too.. I'd wager she doesn't!! And that's partly why she's so gd MISERABLE all the time!! She doesn't take care of herself!!)

But in reality it's whatever. Technically Tevie did nothing wrong. She's just living her life how she wants to live it. Who cares about wasting more gas? Apparently not Tevie even though she told me she did... Apparently that's out the window. Who cares about my needs? Apparently not Tevie Though I've been fighting with our property managers and walking her through every gd adulting problem she has (I'm even supposed to help her with her taxes AGAIN cuz she can't do it) and taking care of the house and all the paperwork and all the phonecalls and everything... So it's not like I've been looking out for her and our little sister at all 🙄 or thinking of them and trying to make THEIR lives easier or nothing.

They don't owe me anything obviously... Not even the requests I made of them to do particular adulting tasks on their own (like put in a simple maintenance request, or cover up the open window downstairs, or even buy the materials so I could take care of that stupid problem better than I already have with the shit we had on hand).... It's up to them if they want to follow through. And they don't. Like ever. Because it'll just be done by me because I actually DO care about how much our power bill is.. Tevie sait she does and then pulls that shit. W0lfie says she does and then pulls the shit like letting her room get ULTRA cold- which guess what happens when she opens her door for the day? You guessed it. The temp of the house goes down and the heat/furnace churns and chugs to make up for it.

I'm so FUCKING DONE.. but guess what? I CAN'T be. I'm not even supposed to be pissed about this stuff!! I'm the bad guy!! Because I'm mad!! Because I can't just let it go or deal with it quietly. Or not be a bother.

GOD DAMN IT I AM SO SICK OF BEING/GOING QUIETLY

I HAVE BEEN QUIET AND CALM AND SWEET AND WORKED MY ASS OFF IN THE WAYS I CAN FOR SO FUCKING LONG

I AM THE REASON THEY HAVE THE SHIT THEY DO!! THE ROOF OVER THEIR HEADS, TEVIE'S CAR, LOWER BILLS (not just because I pay my part, but because I literally put in all the work to make sure stuff is taken care of and that I don't use excess/as much as I want or need sometimes), PAID BILLS (EVERYTHING comes out of my account. I've asked Tevie to do it. Several times. To set it up or to even just pay it once or twice... Has she ever? No. Not even when I showed her how and offered to write it all down for the future- and still she comes back at me like 'well you put them in your name' like, bitch... The water bill HAD to be in my name because at the time they only set it up in person!! Doesn't mean you can't pay it!! All the information is RIGHT THERE!!! You have my permission!!! In fact I've ASKED you to!! And the internet- we switched it to my name so it would lower AND give us a better speed!! And autopay gives us a discount anyway- Something YOU approved of!! And GUESS WHAT? The power ISN'T in my name!! It's in yours!!! Why on EARTH do you still expect me to pay it every single time?! It's not even on autopay!!! And the car insurance.. well SORRY if you have a wreck on your record that would make the premium double or triple what it is now!!! I did that for you!! I even called and asked and compared and did EVERYTHING FOR YOU YOU WOULDN'T/COULDN'T!!! And the cellphones are in my name because years ago when we GOT the plan you didn't have a credit score which was REQUIRED... Guess who did?! ME!! So guess who did all that and set up autopay so we wouldn't get charged $20 more a month?! It's not like we COULDN'T change these things, YOU just DON'T want to deal with it OR you want those discounts and agreed to it in the first place- so your 'well they're all you're responsibility Because they're in your name' is BULLSHIT), EXTRA MONEY EVERY MONTH, EVEN TEVIE'S BANK ACCOUNT, EVERY DOCTOR/DENTIST/SPECIALIST SHE HAS EVER SEEN AFTER OUR MOTHER WAS KICKED TO THE CURB... Even W0lfie is not exempt... Because what I don't do for her, she goes to her mom to take care of. And she's told me things and I've had to ask why she hasn't taken care of it. Well. She either doesn't know how (and in some instances refused to learn cuz it happens again), or was just going to suffer through it because she assumed that was what was right (without asking anyone or even GOOGLING the information)... Gods... Half my 'knowledge' comes from google and checking at least two or three sights and sources before I act... I feel like I'm the only one in my house who has that skill despite the top-notch cellphones and computers and shit laying around everywhere. Despite my little sister literally building her computer... Can't adult life at ALL...

And I just... I just...

I'm so mad and upset.

I want to have the carefree lives they have some days... But then I realize someone wild have to be doing all the shit I do for them for me... And then I get depressed Because literally no one would or will. Even Lon didn't... He took care of his bills sure... But everything else? Well.. unless I asked him to step up, he never would.. and he to never would more than the day I asked. Another red flag I shouldn't have let slide...

No matter how sick I get. No matter how crazy I go... It's still all up to me. I don't have people I can go to to ask to do these things and know they will... I have tos er Everything up and do all the work or it never happens. Especially not more than once.

I hate nagging... And I'm just the bad guy if I try anyway.

Idk what the point even is anymore. I hate my life.

I want so badly to love it and be happy to be around... But I just want to disappear and see what happens when that happens. Would they step up? I mean they'd HAVE to and then I'd be the bad guy again... But ugh...

None of this is easy. None of this is easy especially when all alone.

Few people reach out to me... The ones that do are just as overburdened as I am and can barely talk too because they're so busy... But we try...

I appreciate every one of them/you and I feel awful I'm so drained I can barely say thank you or reply.

I know what it's like... I do... Maybe I don't 100% know the specifics of the reasons behind what you're feeling, but I can feel it with you.

I'm trying. I'm angry. I'm tired... But I'm trying my best.

[fibrofox]

Eating with Chronic Pain

Since I withdrew from college, I've gained a fair bit of weight. This has been a result of decreased activity, medications, and general metabolism slowdown that comes with adulthood. I know a lot of fellow spoonies struggle with their weight and eating habits, so here's a list of things to eat and do to try to keep your body as healthy as it can be. I know not all of these will work for everyone, but they've worked for me. Remember, you NEED to eat. Eating isn't shameful in any way, no matter what you're eating.

Fruit cups (get the ones in the juice instead of syrup if you can as there's less processed sugar then)

Dried fruit/fruit bars

Granola bars (I like these for breakfast when I'm in a lot of pain as they're pretty filling and cheap)

Mac n cheese bowls (these are around $1.50 usually, so if you buy a box of Mac n cheese you can divide it into 3-4 portions and microwave them with enough water to cover the noodles. It takes about 5 minutes, then drain the water and add the cheese powder with some butter or milk)

Try to have at least one fruit or veggie a day. I know you're supposed to have 5-8, but start with a reasonable goal. If you already eat 5-8 servings a day, good job! Try adding another!

You can microwave eggs. Crack it and put it in a cup, add any seasonings, microwave it for 90 seconds

Frozen meals (I get these frozen rice bags at Costco that have chicken and veggies in them, they work out to be about $3 a bag, and they're great for bringing to work when I don't have left overs or at home when I have no energy to cook)

Nuts! I love Brazil nuts (they're hella expensive tho) almonds, peanuts, walnuts, hazelnuts, any kind of nut has a decent amount of protein. If you get them salted, they're a good alternative to chips

Ramen. Add veggies, eggs, what ever floats your goat. I like mine plain

Noodles

Noodles with cheese, sauce, chicken, shrimp, whatever

Quick oats. Add chia seeds+hemp hearts+cinnamon+walnuts/pecans, berries, apple pieces

Make your own trail mix. I like chocolate chips, dried cherries or cranberries, Brazil nuts, peanuts, pumpkin seeds, and sunflower seeds

Buy a pack of your fav mini chocolate bars. I keep mini coffee crisps or Reese's pieces in my purse for when my blood sugar gets low

Sandwiches

Sandwich meat + shredded cheese (corned beef/Montreal smoked meat + shredded cheese + mustard is a fav midnight snack)

If you use a lot of shredded cheese, buy it shredded (I have a really good shredder and I'll shred a ton and keep it in a container, but if you don't have a good shredder/energy to do that, just buy it shredded)

Prep when you have energy

Energy levels good? Chop up some carrot sticks (or buy them already cut up!)

Eating is important. Being in pain uses a lot of energy and you need to fuel your body. You need to eat carbs, fats, proteins, fruits, and veggies.

Feel free to reblog and add your fav snacks!

[weekendwarriorblog]

30 Minute Experiment: Free Advice #30ME

I’m guessing that this is gonna be the #30ME that gets me intro trouble, but I’ve promised myself that I wouldn’t slack off and neglect my dedication to writing 30 minutes every day about something other than movies (mostly) and this was just something that’s been on my mind lately. No, I will not be offering any free advice. If you’ve clicked on this link, your bank account has already been charged the $5 fee for reading my rambling. I’m joking...

Yeah, I’m kind of in a mood today. If we’re friends on Facebook, you already know about the mouse problem I’ve been having that seems to be getting worse as I continue to stockpile a non-existent pantry with dry food to make sure I always have something to eat just in case some of my old reliable food sources in the neighborhood close down again. Maybe I’ve mentioned in one of these about the deli that closed or the pizza places (most if not all of them), the dumpling place, the Chinese markets where I get lots of my supplies and food suff at relatively inexpensive prices. March and April really put me in a place where I needed to change how I deal with making sure I have food to eat since so many of the once reliable places around me were closed due to COVID.

I ended up ordering a lot of dry food from Amazon -- CLIF bars, ramen noodles, Pop-tarts, etc -- just so I’d always have a supply of food without having to spend an exorbitant amount of money to order take-out through Seamless/GrubHub, which can tack on around $10 or more for tax, tips, delivery charges, etc.

I’ll be the first to admit that some of my choices in food may not have been great, and I’m well aware that Pop-Tarts and ramen is not the healthiest diet, and I got a LOT of advice on what I should be eating instead. How I should be doing this or that or another thing... cooking my own meals, rather than having processed food, etc.

I’ve had a mouse problem in my apartment and building since I moved in and that’s just a part of living in my area of Chinatown where there are a lot of food trading places and restaurants including a couple right on the ground floor of the building. Many but not all of them have been closed over the last few weeks, so the mice need to find food somewhere... and here’s my apartment with boxes of dry food including mac and cheese, etc. Score!

Now mind you, I don’t have a real patnry and even my shelf space is limited so I ended up with boxes of food sitting on the floor between my very small fridge and my mostly unusable stove. The thing is that I live in a studio apartment where literally everything is in the front room so my bed is about five feet from the aforementioned stove/refrigerator.  

So when a mouse decides that my stockpile is open game for its own appetite, I’m usually the first person to know about it. Mice are very noisy creatures who do not care who hears them nibbling on any food they can get their annoying little teeth on. I’ve frequently noticed the path of their nibbling destruction after the fact when I find things they’ve left behind... oddly, they seem to like ketchup.

Anyway, I noticed a bit of their remains earlier in the week and last night when I was awake around 5 in the morning, I actually caught one mouse jumping out of a box of mac and cheese and when I peered inside, I noticed that it had gnawed a tiny hole at the bottom of one serving (these are the plastic cups I can cook in the microwave). So I ended up spending about 15 minutes rearranging everything to make it harder for the mice to get into stuff and eventually went back to sleep.

I mentioned this on my FB page and a few friends gave me some free advice on killing mice and maybe I’m just in a testy mood but I kind of felt like I had to finally say, “I’m not asking for advice” because over the past six weeks, I’ve been getting a lot of “free advice” on things even when I’m not asking for any. Believe me, when I need advice, I ask and appreciate any suggestions. 

But I feel like for some reason in this pandemic, everyone is throwing out free advice from relatives to elected officials and it’s getting to be a little much for me. Believe me, I don’t need to hear every ten minutes how to wash my hands, something that the city seems necessary to run as PSAs during every commercial break. 

I also know full well the limitations of my lifestyle and the fact that I live in a shitty apartment since that’s the only way I could afford to live in New York City. Believe me, I’d love to have a nicer apartment, job, etc. etc.  But a lot of people who are offering me free advice have no idea that maybe the way they live is not the way I’ve been forced to live.

But also, I’ve been dealing with the mice in this building for over two decades and I’ve killed HUNDREDS! If it was just a matter of getting some traps, I would have already done this but... and I’ve mentioned this before... all the places in my neighborhood where I usually would buy traps are closed... some permanently and long before the COVID outbreak.

Maybe I’m a little pissy today due to the sleep I lost from this one pesky little mouse -- I’ve gotten used to wearing earplugs at night due to other noises in my neighborhood so at least I’m not kept awake by their nibbling as I’ve been in the past. But people who know me should know that I tend to like to kvetch about things, and that doesn’t mean that I need to hear people’s opinions or advice on what I should do about things. I’m well aware of all my resources, maybe more than others are.

I know this might sound a bit ungracious since I do have so many friends and acquaintances who mean well, but I also have family always telling me how I should live my life, and there are just some days (like today) when I probably shouldn’t say anything because any responses to what I say are just gonna annoy me as much as the problem. 

So yeah, I guess today’s #30MinuteExperiment is a bit more ranty and rambling than I like to make these, but hey, if you’re already reading these, then you already know that you can probably expect any one of my ever changing moods depending on what I’m feeling when I set aside the 30 minutes to write this.  Part of this is just getting it out of my system rather than just getting snippy with friends, family or co-workers but I’m just getting so much “free advice” thrown at me from the news and talk shows and anyone who thinks they know best for others that it finally has gotten to be too much for me after almost two months of it. 

Maybe I’m getting a little antsy about what’s going to happen over the next two months as nothing seems to be getting resolved in terms of fixing the bigger problems but yeah, a situation like a mouse is kind of minor right now. It’s something I know how to deal with even if every so often (like today) I feel the need to kvetch about it or the sleep I lost wondering how much I’ll have to do to dissuade this pesky critter from getting into my food supply. Again, it’s very very minor... but things like this tend to get exacerbated by people trying to be helpful, so yeah, that’s where I’m at as of this writing. 

I have to write my prison-bound pen pal and I might as well get this out of the way since I know that a mouse would seem fairly minor compared to his own situation, but I guess I didn’t have anything else to write about today and didn’t want to shirk my credo to do 30 minutes of straight writing. Thankfully, I only have a few minutes left of this #30Me which probably should be retitled “Free AdMICE” (ha ha) since I spent most of it talking about this one mouse, who I may actually name soon if I’m stuck in this tiny apartment for two more months with it.  Believe me, having vermin getting into my food supply with everything else going on in the world isn’t great but it’s also the least of my ever-growing concerns.

Anyway, i end today’s #30ME with this last bit of free advice... if you ever get the crazy idea to write for 30 minutes straight about any given topic and you decide to keep doing it, regardless of anyone is writing what you’re writing or not... don’t do it! 

That’s my free advice. 

Hopefully I’ll have a better topic and be in a better mood tomorrow. :)

[zutaralover94]

Secret child, run away bride/groom, sex hotline operator

So I did not get a little teary-eyed writing this. This is the secret child AU. I am working on the other two. I will make sure to tag you in both of those when I post them. Anyway, Thanks so much for these three prompts! Here we go!

Zuko picked up another box of ramen cups and all but sighed as he put it in his basket filled with similar easy make meals for one. It was just his typical once a month, late night grocery shopping trip. Things that spoiled faster he bought at the convenience store at the end of the block. He pushed the basket a little further down the aisle when a kids came running by with a quick ‘Scuse me!’.

Zuko paid the child no mind. It was normal this late at night for parents to let their kids run through the empty store. He looked back to the dark haired kid stepping up on the lowest shelf. Zuko stepped away from his basket to help the child out. “Here,” Zuko grabbed for the pickled sea prunes and placed it in the child’s hands.

The kid blinked up to him with a smile and a high pitched, “Thanks!” before running back off and down another aisle.

But Zuko didn’t move an inch.

The little girl looked like Azula but with really tanned skin. And maybe without that evil little sister glint in her golden eyes. Her dark hair was pulled back in the messiest pigtail buns. And the uniform she wore wasn’t one of the local schools. And the pickled sea prunes… That wasn’t an everyday…

Nope!

Not possible.

Zuko shook his head and walked to his cart. It was a long day already. He just needed to get home put a mac and cheese cup in the microwave and sit on the couch in his boxers. He deserved it. After the four hour long training session with new employees. Then the next four hours spent on a international conference call. And after all of that he had to play catch up on what he had missed through his training sessions and the meeting. Plus with the end of the month reports due in the morning, Zuko stayed an extra three hours.  

He pushed his cart down the next aisle and debated cereal or pop tarts. He always went for the pop tarts because again he didn’t want to have to buy milk only for it to go bad because he doesn’t have time in his morning to do a sit down meal. So poptarts-

Zuko reached out for the moving cart as the kid from the aisle earlier was now standing in the cart and grabbing at a box of cereal causing the cart to move back from under her.

“Lulu!” The mother, or who he assumed was her mother, reached out for the child. Grabbing her just in time as her and the box of cereal decided to tumble out of the cart. “Oh spirits.” The woman cradled the child into her arms and Zuko gently pushed  the cart back. “Thank yo-,”

Zuko finally looked up to fully taken in the familiar looking woman. Her hair was pulled back in a  loose ponytail, her shirt rode up on the side the child was propped on, and her jeans looked well worn. She blinked bright blue, tired eyes at Zuko.

Zuko could swear on whatever you laid in front of him now that, this, Katara with a child on her hip, was definitely the most beautiful sight he had ever taken in.

“Be careful next time, okay kid?” Zuko smiled to the little girl as she was set back in the basket and told to sit down. She did as she was told and nodded to Zuko. Katara gave a brief smile and pushed her cart away.

+++

“Mommy, who was that?”

“Huh?” Katara blinked up from where she was staring at her shaking grocery list.

“That guy had golden eyes like me!” Lulu smiled up to her mother.

“See I told you there was other people out there with golden eyes!” Katara smiled back tears and looked down at her list. She had gotten most of everything on the list and whatever was left, Sokka could come get himself.

Katara pushed the cart to the checkout area. There were only two lanes open right next to each other. Katara blew a breath of relief to not see Zuko anywhere around. She began loading up the conveyor belt with groceries and a few thing Katara forgot to pack for her and Lulu.

“She’s a cutie.”

Katara looked out of the corner of her eye to see Zuko placing his items on the conveyor belt next to hers. She bit her lip and turned to take more groceries out of her basket. Maybe if she ignored him…

“Thank you!” Lulu smiled brightly and handed Katara a bundle of tomatoes.

“You are very welcome.” Zuko gave an identical smile. Katara stacked three bags of chips on the belt. “Party?”

“Yes,” Katara was quick to answer. “Lulu hand me the deli meats.”

Lulu did as she was told, “It’s for my birthday!”

Katara and Zuko paused simultaneously. Katara took a deep breath and held it as she heard the dreaded question that was masked in a happy tone.

“And how older are you going to be?”

“Five,” Lulu wiggled slightly in the cart. “But I’m only four right now. That’s not until next week even though we are celebrating it this week with Uncle Sokka and Aunt Suki.” The little girl handed the last can in the basket to Katara.

“Five years old.”

Katara cringed and prayed the cashier would checkout her items faster. She needed out of this store. It was silly for her to bring Lulu back. Sokka and Suki could have done her birthday another time. But Lulu had begged to see her brother’s large dog, who was correctly named, Bear. And when Sokka said they could stay for as long as they wanted as long as they picked up groceries, Katara quickly agreed. So Katara packed up as soon as she got off work, picked Lulu up from daycare and start her four and a half hour drive.

Katara guessed 11 p.m. was just not late enough to go grocery shopping.

“How old are you?” Lulu was leaning on the side of the cart.

“Lulu, it’s not nice to ask people questions.” Her mother gently scolded her child.

“It’s fine,” Zuko nodded. “I’ll be 28 in a few months.”

“You’re older than mommy!”

Katara grabbed Lulu out of the cart and pushed the now empty cart to the bagger. She held onto her daughter’s hand and watched the total on the screen add up with each item. Just ignore him a little longer. You can do this.

“Yeah?” Katara watched out of the corner of her eye as Zuko leaned down to Lulu’s height.

“Spirits!” Lulu gasped.

“Lulu!” Katara turned to her child.

“Mommy! Look he’s hurt!” Lulu pointed to the light pink scar down the left side of his face.

Katara did her best not to react to the scar. But Lulu was right. It was hided well under his long bangs. “Honey, it is rude to point to out things like that.”

“It’s alright,” Zuko lifted up his bangs to show off the skin. Katara raised a hand to her mouth and her daughter reached out to touch her father’s face. Katara quickly grabbed the hand in hers. Zuko looked up to her and let the bangs fall. And Katara could have sworn the whole world stopped around her.

“What happened?” Lulu brought their attention back to her.

“Lu-”

“Well when I was just a little older than you. I had a very mean dad who didn’t like me very much.” Zuko told Lulu.

“That’s so sad.” Lulu tightened her hand in Katara’s. “I didn’t know my dad. But Mommy says he was a very nice man and went to heaven because he helped all those people in the burning building. He was a firefighter.”

Zuko blinked in surprise a few times before looking up to Katara.

“165.98.”

Katara had never been so happy to hear someone else’s voice and quickly turned to the cashier to pay for the groceries. “Thank you.” she tugged on Lulu’s hand to signal they were leaving. Lulu’s ‘Bye!’ echoed around the empty store.

Katara quickly turned on the car and loaded Lulu into her carseat before turning and loading the groceries into trunk.

“A firefighter huh?”

Katara froze briefly, before nonchalantly wiping her eyes with her arm, “She asked and I told her.”

“A lie.” Zuko bit back.

“Well, I certainly didn’t think we would ever run into each other ever again.” Katara continued to pile in her groceries.

“But what about when she got older? And had other questions. Then what?” Zuko tightened his grip on the cart.

“She wouldn’t ask because you,” Katara huffed as she lifted the potatoes into the trunk as well. “Her father is dead.”

“But I’m not dead 'Tara.”

Katara slammed the truck closed and turned to Zuko, the fire he loved so much caught ablaze in her eyes. “I did what I thought was best. I wanted her to know that you were a good person but reaching out for you was like reaching past the grave. Completely unobtainable.” Katara nudged Zuko’s cart with her own so she could put it in the return.

“When was I ever 'unobtainable’?” Zuko bumped her cart right back.

“The minute you took over your dad’s business.” Katara pushed back and finally made it past Zuko.

“I thought we were okay with that?” Zuko said after she had returned to her car.

“No,” Katara opened up the driver’s door. “You saw the opportunity to move up and left no time for me or our unborn child.”

“If you would have just told me-,”

“You would have what?” Katara stepped back towards Zuko. “Huh? Tried to work less hours? Maybe get a vacation day here or there? Quit?” Katara snorted an ugly laugh.

“I-,” Zuko sighed

“So I left,” Katara crossed her arms. “Because that was the only option left.”

The two stood in the quiet of the late night. Stuck in their own thoughts.

“I don’t expect anything now that you do know.” Katara looked back into the car to see Lulu yawn and swipe on a game on her tablet. “We’ve made it this long.”

“Katara,” Zuko sigh and pushed the cart back and forth a few times. “You shouldn’t have to do it alone. She’s my daughter too.”

“You really don’t have to. I’ve been making it well without you for the past five years.” Katara looked back to Zuko and frowned. “I really should get her to Sokka’s. She needs to go to bed.”

“Right,” Zuko nodded in agreement. But they both stood there for a moment.

“Good bye, Zuko.” Katara finally said her voice breaking through the tears that had started to form again.

“Bye, ‘Tara.” Zuko whispered and began pushing his cart towards his car.

“The party is at 6 tomorrow.” Katara called out. “If you get off in time, you should swing by Sokka’s. It’s my parents old place. You remember where that is?”

“Really?” Zuko’s smile practically lit up the dark parking lot..

“She turns five and loves ducks and turtles. Her favorite color is red. Spirits, if she isn’t your child through and through.” Katara gave a wobbling smile.

“Turtles and ducks. Got it.” Zuko nodded. “Do I need to bring anything else?”

“Ha, probably a bodyguard!” Katara yelled across the parking lot.

“What-?” Zuko asked but Katara was already in her car and waving bye.

+++

“You ran into him?”

Katara nodded to Suki who sat opposite of her on the couch. A game of cards between the two of them on the center couch cushion. “And I may have invited him…” Katara bit her bottom lip and gave Suki a guilty look.

“Katara!” Suki exclaimed and looked round. “Sorry, what were you thinking?” Suki laid down three 5s on to the center and placed a 7 in the center.

“I wasn’t.” Katara shook her head and looked at her hand.

“So you invited the father to your daughter’s fifth birthday party. The daughter thinks her dad died in a fire but he’s actually coming to her birthday party.” Suki picked up more cards from the center.

“Possibly. There’s still a chance that he won’t make it.” Katara sighed as Suki set down a wild card on her straight. “Plus Lulu has no idea that Zuko is her father.”

All of Suki’s cards fell out of her hands as she gaped at Katara. “I’m sorry who did you say the father was?”

“Why do you act so surprised?” Katara down her large straight. “Then again I guess you did come into this kind of late.”

“I mean I remember you both were seriously dating. But I don’t-,” Suki began picking her cards back up. “I honestly thought she was Jet’s.”

“Agni, Jet feels like decades ago. We only dated until I couldn’t hide the fact I was pregnant.” Katara laid out a pair of 2s. “I’m glad that didn’t work out. Heard he was a leader of an air band.”

“No way,” Suki rearranged her card before placing her set of 2s down. “Do you think we could invite him too for the entertainment?”

“I swear to Yue if you call him I will demote you as Godmother to Lulu.” Katara threatened weakly.

“Just try and stop me.” Suki laughed and waited for Katara to play her hand. “So why did you invite him?”

Katara sighed and dropped her hands down into her lap. “I-,” Katara let out a long breath. “We were talking about how I don’t really need him to be here. That we are fine on our own. I don’t know.” Katara finally slumped back and over the armrest causing her back to pop in about three places.

“I think you do.” Suki finished her hand with a clap. “And you should just say it out loud while it’s just you and me here.”

Katara wrinkled her eyebrows and shook her head. No, I don’t have those feelings anymore. It’s been five years. I’ve gotten over it. I’ve gotten over him. But there was a tug in her chest that made her feel hollow. Like it knew the lie she was repeating over and over again in her head. “Nah, I really don’t think I do.”

+++

Zuko showed up a little after six jiggling the keys in his hands and looking out to Katara’s parents house.

They had a kid. She was five. She loved the color red.

I wanted her to know that you were a good person but reaching out for you was like reaching past the grave. Completely unobtainable.

Her name is Lulu. She has the beautiful tanned skin of her mother. Her dark hair like his.

I’ve been making it well without you for the past five years.

Zuko grabbed for the gift. It was his oldest memory of his mother. A small yellow duck. His mother would be overjoyed to know that he had pasted it down to his child.

“Okay, you can do this. You’re here for Ka-Lulu. You are here for Lulu. Give her the gift. Wish her a happy birthday. Good,” Zuko talked himself into finally opening the door and getting out. “Hey, it’s me. Zuko. I came to give Lulu her present. Yes. Good.” Zuko whispered to himself as he walked up the sidewalk to the house. Streamers and balloons had been tied to the banister and around the door. Zuko pressed the doorbell and a loud deep barking erupted on the other side. Zuko jumped and almost took back to the car but the door opened before he could.

“Hey. it’s me-,” Zuko started with a raise of his hand. Sokka glared at him and man five years can really buff up a dude. Zuko swallowed and held out the frilly pink sparkly birthday bag. “It’s for Lulu.”

“Well, duh it’s her birthday.” Sokka leaned against the frame of the door and looked from the present up the arm to the person holding it and back again. “What are you doing here?”

“I-uh,”

“Sokka, please.” Zuko heard Katara’s slight beg towards Sokka. Sokka opened the door for him but before he could make it over the threshold Sokka’s arm came out to stop him.

“Hurt my sister or her baby and I’ll have you buried six feet under without any traces of you being gone.” Sokka growled under his breath then switched to a smile when another girl passed through the hallway. “Suki, you remember Zuko right?”

“Vaguely.” Suki stretched out a hand and shook Zuko’s. “Welcome, you can put your presents on the table. We are all out back anyway.”

Zuko followed the couple after Sokka closed the door. He placed his gift along with the rest of them before making his way out through the sliding glass door. He was surprised to see lots of faces he knew already one or two he didn’t. There were three kids playing in a sand pit including Lulu. When she saw him, she waved but quickly went back to playing.

“You made it.” Katara gave just a small smile and gestured to a lawn chair. “We’ll have sandwiches soon. But we were waiting for Toph to get back with the cake.”

“Oh okay,” Zuko nodded and sat down in the chair next to her.

The party went on with light talk and laughter. There was a few stories that filled Zuko in from the past five years, a few he remembers himself. He found himself quickly brought back into the circle of friends. He was even invited to a BBQ happening next month. But he couldn’t bring himself to give a clear answer whether or not he would be there. This all, everything, depended on Lulu and her mother.

Zuko happily stood behind Katara and Suki as Lulu opened presents. “And this one is from Zuko.” Katara placed the pink sack in front of Lulu. Lulu looked to where he was standing before ripping out the tissue paper.

Lulu let out the loudest squeal yet as she reached into the bag. “Oh my spirits! I love him!” Lulu squeezed the yellow duck. “I am going to take him everywhere.” Lulu looked directly at Zuko with honest golden eyes.

“I’m really glad you like him.” Zuko smiled at his daughter and felt emotions he never knew pop into his chest. He coughed and excused himself to down the hallway as he felt the warmth begin to swim in his eyes.

Zuko blew out a breath and wiped at his eyes. Five years. He had missed out on five years of her life. That was time he would never get back. Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a shaky breath. This could be the very last time he would ever see her again. Zuko sucked in a breath of air through his teeth as he realized he didn’t know who he was more upset about never seeing again, Lulu or Katara. “Oh fuck.” A tear slid down his face and he sniffled.

“Zuko?” Katara laid a hand on his shoulder.

Zuko turned in surprise, “I’m fine.” He opened his mouth and rubbed at his other eye when he realized that it was going to start leaking too. “I, um, I guess it’s time for me to leave. Will you, um,” Zuko cleared his throat. “Will you let her know that her dad.” Zuko swallowed and a tear leaked down the other side of his face. “That I love her very much.”

Katara looked to be struggling to hold back tears too but she nodded.

“I’m sorry, ‘Tara.” Zuko gave a weak smile. “I hope someday you will both forgive me for the last five years.” He finally gave up trying to wipe the tears out of his own eyes and focused on the ones running down Katara’s face. He swiped thumbs over Katara’s cheeks, “And all the years to come. Please forgive me.”

Katara reached up to Zuko’s wrists and tilted her head into Zuko’s left palm with a light kiss, “I’ll let her know. The truth.” Katara pulled Zuko hands away from her face. “So, um expect her to be on your doorstep saying she hates me and wants to live with you now.” Katara and Zuko both let out a light laugh.

“As long as you’re not far behind her.” Zuko leaned his forehead against Katara’s. “I’ve really missed you ‘Tara.”

“I-I’ve missed you, too.” Zuko watched tired blue eyes close before he closed his too. They stood there and listened to the party still going on in the other room. Katara and Zuko both leaning on the other for the first time in over five years.

“Ahem!” Zuko and Katara broke apart and took a step back from one another as Suki stood there with an eyebrow raised. “Be glad it was me and not Sokka.” Suki turned back to the party.

The birthday girl’s parents stood there in awkward silence for way too long of a moment.

“I hope that you come to the BBQ next month. I’ll be bringing Lulu with me.” Katara said after a deep inhale.

“I’ll make sure to put it on my calendar.” Zuko nodded and stepped to the door. “I’m going to go. I don’t want to overstay-,”

Katara quickly stepped up to him and kissed him on the cheek, “Thank you for the gift. Ursa would be pleased that you kept it to give to her.”

“Yeah,” Zuko felt a blush creep up like he was a teenaged girl. “Bye, Katara.”

“Bye, Zuko.” Katara smiled and leaned against the door to watch the love of her life leave. But not for long. And never, ever did another five days go by without them seeing each other.

Author’s note: I was going to do this big long flash back of Uncle Iroh knowing that Katara was pregnant and sending her money each month. And in respect she was going to name her child after Lu Ten. So I went with Lulu. 

[thechocoboos]

Headcanons: The Bros as Roommates

I’m going off to college soon and was thinking about roommates, so this was born

Warnings: swearing of course

Noctis

Noctis just showed up one day looking for a roommate

You had no idea he was the Prince of Lucis, all you knew is he showed up with your ad and a wad of cash in hand (good enough for any broke person, right?)

You didn’t even find out he was the fuckin prince until like… four, five months into it? When you did find out, you were more pissed than anything else cause that meant he totally had enough money to buy a new microwave when he accidentally blew the old one up

He didn’t even tell you about him being a prince, you found out when his dad (the fucking goddamn King of Lucis) showed up one afternoon like “Hi I’m looking for my son” with the Shield of the King behind him

Schools might not have showed pictures of the King’s son, but you damn well knew what the King looked like and seeing him at your apartment door when you were in your bum clothes was terrifying

Noctis had a lot of explaining to do that night (after Regis and his shield, Clarus, joined you two for supper, of course)

Overall tho, he was an alright roommate

He didn’t bug you (in fact, he barely talked to you unless you initiated conversation or if he had to give you a heads up about some guests)

And much like yourself (probably, if you’re on this hell hole of a websight), he was a bit of a night owl. Dude stayed up until 2 am at the earliest, and usually slept to noon (unless he had a prince thing to do)

Your biggest two complaints? He constantly made messes and the boi had no fucking independence (you had to show this manchild how to do his own laundry ffs)

Oh, he’d also use your hair products and shit, too (so make that three)

Anyways, you’d come home after a long day of work and school and the damn apartment was a fucking mess like…? What the hell? There’d be overcooked mac n cheese on the coffee table, blankets and pillows all over the living room, crumbs everywhere…

Turns out, it wasn’t just him making those messes

One day, you showed up and there were just three other grown ass men in the room, roaring with laughter and playing poker with bags of chips all over the place and various drinks in their hands

It was the first time you had ever met Noctis’ best friends (and it was not the last, either), and you were a lil pissed that they had been making so many messes

Still, they were cool dudes and sometimes you’d play video games together

In fact, the more you saw of Noctis’ friends, the closer to Noctis you became. It was thanks to his little blonde friend, Prompto

Lil Prom always felt bad about the messes and noise, so he’d drag you into their fun and games (you both loved and hated him for that)

ANyways

The closer you became with Noct, the more you saw of his weird shadow, Ignis

You’d get up in the morning, walk out into your living room in nothing more than your undies and a sheerish shirt, and there Mr. Scientia would be, chillin’ with a cookbook in hand while wearing his best clothes

It was creepy; half the time it felt like you had a third roommate who didn’t pay rent

He’d just… be there. Sometimes he’d nag Noctis, other times he’d cook (always made some for you, too), and occasionally, he’d just talk to you (you lowkey got a crush on him as this went on)

Still, Noct was a great roommate at the end of the day, especially when you two became friends

Prompto

You were the one to find his ad, this time around

Saw a tiny ad on the craigslist of Insomnia and were just broke and desperate enough to take it

You had prepared yourself for the worst, but when you met Prompto, you found all your worries were in vain

He was the sweetest, most polite roommate you’d ever had (and probably would ever have, tbh)

He pretty much lived around your schedule, he’d always ask if you had to be up early so he’d keep the noise down if need be and he was super conscientious of your schedules

Boi was like a saint

If anything broke, he’d fix it in a jiffy

If anything needed replacing, he took care of it

And guess what else? Prompto Argentum can cook. He’d make meals a good few times a week (usually in bulk so he could have leftovers and save stuff), and he would always, always make you some

Honestly? If it wasn’t for Prompto’s cooking you’d probably have fed off of nothing but frozen food and stale chips

He wasn’t a master chef or anything by far, but he had some basic knowledge of cooking and he used it regularly

Sometimes you’d joke about having to marry him for that and he’d blush a bright tomato red every time (it was super cute, too)

The boi also C L E A N E D

To be fair, tho, he was also messy. Always making messes. BUT, he cleaned, which was more than you could ever ask for

He’d clean up his messes, your messes, the messes of friends… Just, he was a clean boi.

Once again, not super masterful at it, but he could clean pretty damn decently and you were not about to complain

Fun fact: Prompto forgot about the existence of periods, so if you happen to be a female who gets periods, good fucking luck lmao

Whenever you’d roll around in bed from the pain of cramps (or puking or crying or other such horrible things), he would absolutely panic

And when he caught sight of a bloody tampon or pad? Or a lil bit of blood on the toilet? Oh god, he was a wreck. He ran into your room, eyes wide and worried, demanding to know if you were okay. Boi even offered to take you to a doctor

Of course, when you told him that it was just your period, he was just embarrassed

Much to his credit though, he would make sure that the kitchen was stocked with chocolates and that there was a heating pad for you to use (and some pain meds), so yeah, probably the best roommate in the world

But the negatives?

He liked to talk - a lot.

You’d come home and if he was there, you bet your ass there was conversations to be had. Not a morning person? Too fucking bad. Prompto’s got some juicy convos to have with you at 8 AM

It was cute, yes, but more annoying than anything else (as precious as he was, it was sometimes too much)

Still, if you asked for a lil bit of quiet time, he would listen and back off immediately

That went with any complaint, he always listened and changed his behavior accordingly

And in saying that, if anything you did happened to bug him? He would bottle that shit up until he broke down crying

You never really saw many of his friends, but you quickly picked up that he usually went to their places (you eventually found out that it was so they wouldn’t bug you, bless his lil considerate heart)

The one friend you did see regularly was Noctis, and he was so chill that you usually barely noticed he was there (and when you guys did hang out, he was just as chill)

Sometimes, Prompto would have breakdowns or anxiety attacks tho

You weren’t always sure what to do, but you did your best to help him out or to comfort him (he appreciated it more than you ever knew)

In the end, you guys became great friends that knew each other pretty damn well. You guys would always end up accommodating for the other person in your daily lives without ever realizing it

Basically, you guys were G O A L S

Gladio

Gladio was the one who answered the ad

You were scared to death at first, but you had bills to pay and were desperate af

You were surprised when he was moving in, a good half of his boxes were books and he had a whole box of scented candles (the man had good taste, too)

Gladio was pretty gruff and he kept to himself for the most part

However, if something was bugging him, you bet your ass he would bring it straight to you to talk things out, and he expected the same in return

That was how he worked as a whole; he would do his best to make your life not shitty and expected the same from you

It wasn’t hard to avoid bugging him; he was hardly ever home (you later found out it was his job as the Prince’s shield, which explained a shit ton of his life)

Gladio noticeably left you and your shit alone, but eventually you two became closer (you probably bond over a book series or a TV show, things like that)

You bet your ass that once you guys became close, he borrowed your shit, teased you a bit, and boundaries went out the fucking window

He’d stolen more blankets than you even knew you had. There were times when he stole your hair brush or your shampoo, hell, he even started using your damn body wash (“That shit is fucking expensive, Gladio!”). You swear he even used your toothbrush once, but you could never prove it.

Still, y’all were close (Noctis once made a comment about the sexual tension, but neither of you ever acknowledged it)

Even tho Gladio intimidated you a shit ton in the beginning, when you two became comfortable around each other, his presence made you feel safer than anything else

If a robber or a murderer tried to break in, he would handle it faster and smoother than anyone else

Plus the creepy neighbor next door was too scared of Gladio to be weird towards you anymore (bless)

His little sister showed up a lot, too

You liked her so it was never a problem (in fact, you looked forward to her sudden visits). You always got a kick out of her nagging Gladio about his messy room or how he makes the apartment “smell like man”

Anyways, when he actually graced the apartment with his presence, there would be a candle lit and a book in his hand. Sometimes, he’d have some chill music playing and it wasn’t uncommon for him to hog the bathtub for a solid hour

Surprisingly, Gladio could cook. He didn’t do it often, but when he did, the apartment was full of delicious smelling spices and you could count on there being a great big steak waiting for you at dinner

More often than not, he just helped himself to massive cup noodles tho (it got to a point where you were concerned for his health)

You met his friends a few times, but it was usually in passing whenever Gladio had to grab something

The friend you saw the most was Ignis; sometimes he and Gladio would be up late drinking in your shared apartment, but they were fairly quiet and respectful (minus Gladio’s loud laughter and Ignis’ mild chuckles when they got too tipsy)

Despite seeing Ignis the most, you knew the most about Noctis simply from Gladio bitching about the shit Noct pulls with Prompto. Sometimes he’d just complain about his job, too, and through that you learned what kind of people his friends were and that was actually how you pieced together his job enough to get a proper response as to what he did with his time

Sidenote: Gladdy was never great with technology

You never, ever saw him watching TV or playing video games (unless it was with his other friends), and the few times you saw him on a laptop, it was a noticeably old model and he was grumbling about how he “couldn’t work the damn thing”

More often than not, you had to help him out with technology troubles; he was pretty shit with computers and such (it was pretty comical at times)

From there, you learned that he hated driving and didn’t even have a license. In fact, he just hated technology; the only reason he had a smartphone was because his job pretty much required it for communication purposes

In summary: Gladdy was old fashioned and you didn’t trust him alone with your computer

But yeah, you guys had a weird roommate relationship

He was hardly there, but you guys got along surprisingly well and even had some “self-care days” together (it was your idea, but when you guys tried it, he found he liked it)

Ignis

When he showed up, following up with the ad you put in the newspaper, you were pretty surprised like...

Those designer shoes? The impeccable hair? High quality glasses? The man could probably afford the best apartment on his own, yet there he was, at your own front door (turns out, he chose your apartment due to its close proximity to the Citadel and Noct’s  apartment)

When he actually was home, it was like he wasn’t there 

In fact, half the time you were like “Sorry? Roommate? What roommate? I only know the mysterious check that appears in the kitchen that always pays half the rent!” (dude was home even less than Gladio and his apartment)

The only way you knew he was actually in the apartment was when you could smell food being made or hear noise from the kitchen

In the beginning, Ignis was strangely firm with boundaries. He never went in your room or messed with your stuff unless it was out in the open (hell, even when you two actually became friends he wouldn’t get in your business)

You had to specifically tell him it was okay to go put your shit back in your room if he mentioned that you left something out

And if you went into his room or touched his stuff without asking? Oooo boi, be prepared for some saltiness in the few exchanges you had with him

The more you got to know Iggy, the saltier he was about things. Like if you purposefully did something to annoy him, he would be the most passive-aggressive person in the world

Even so (especially in the beginning), Ignis was very forward with problems or annoyances. If anything was wrong, he’d call it in to be fixed and let you now right after. He’d also tell you if you needed to clean something or if your appearance was… lacking. The closer you two got, the more forward he was

There were quite a few times when he’d tell you your room is a mess or that you look like a slob

Still, it took quite a bit of time and effort to get there. He was hardly home, and when he was, he pointedly left you alone after a quick nod of acknowledgement

In fact, he was usually doing work at the dining room table or actually sleeping for once, so if you wanted to talk with him, you’d have to initiate it

As mentioned earlier, he did cook or bake when he was home. Usually, he was trying to master a recipe and always had you test out his food

When you asked why, he merely told you that he had been exposed to the smell too long to viably give a proper response to its taste (in response, you told him he was a dork)

The more you got to know him (over a painstaking year, might I add), the more of a dork he seemed to be (he totally is a dork, btw)

At first, he had been uptight and mildly intimidating, but as time went on, you caught sight of the occasional fumble in his step, heard the dumb puns he said, and listened as he eagerly told you of one of the few hobbies he genuinely enjoyed

He also grew fond of you, much to your own surprise

He’d even make your favorite foods out of nowhere sometimes (he’d always say it was for practice, although you both knew the truth)

Iggy kept his job surprisingly private, even when he would stay up late working on documents at the dining room table. It took a long time for you to find out he was actually the adviser to the Prince. In fact, Noctis had actually been over a good seven or eight times before you found out

Still, even when you knew, Ignis never really told you what was going on in his job for the longest time. Part of you thought it was due to important secrecy, but when you asked, it turned out that Ignis didn’t want to burden you with anything (“Your life is rather stressful on its own, wouldn’t you agree?”)

It took several different conversation to actually get him to talk about work for once, and when he did, it was mostly just complaints and salty bitching about certain employees or mistakes others have done (it was pretty funny, actually)

Ignis never really had company over, either

In the beginning you seriously doubted that he had any friends at all

Despite how many times he told you that he had friends, you didn’t believe him until three of them showed up unannounced at the apartment at 11 AM on a Satuday, proclaiming that they were having a card game session whether “Specs wants to or not!”

You never thought Ignis would be friends with guys like the other chocobros, but when you saw them interact, it seemed like it shouldn’t be anyone else at all

In the end, even if Ignis wasn’t home a lot and even if you didn’t really know his friends too well, you guys did care about each other in a weird, subtle way. But hey, it worked

[jackmags]

9.11.2020

Consumption Day 2:

Today I was sick. I had a runny nose, and was pretty tired. My main goal of today was to go to work, finish some homework, and watch a movie. 

I really wanted to buy takeout today. My room mates got Raising Canes, my friends got Avocadish, and I was really in the mood for something warm because I was feeling under the weather. Instead, I ate toast with organic peanut butter, almonds, and bananas. For lunch I had a salad with blackberries, cucumbers, and carrots. I had two cups of coffee today (Highlander Grogg blend I don’t know brand). For dinner I had those microwaveable rice, quinoa, and whole grain packets. 

In terms of media, I worked today (I’m a designer and social media analyst intern), so I was on Instagram and Twitter a ton. I also had to search the news for post content. I normally go through the university, student groups, MN Daily, Star Tribune, and other related google searches. I also watched Youtube again today. I stick to my main channels, today being Party Ktichen, a food preparation channel.

I did some yoga, took a shower, and went to bed. I went on a walk outside. My room mates played video games, but I don’t, so I didn’t pay attention to what they were playing. I used Kleenex and Burts Bees a lot today. Really heavily considered Annies Mac and Cheese for dinner. I watched Perfect Blue: a animation by Satoshi Kon. It was about mental health, reality, consumerism, and the effects of media and fetishization on popular figures. 10/10 would recommend. 

[frozenfruitdrinksnejt059-blog]

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Here are 20 Hard-to-Find GroceriesAnd Where to Find Them. ShutterstockFrozen peas are good for even more than calming your pains and also discomforts! Adding peas to your dishes will certainly give you an added protein increase as well as supply you with even more than 3 grams of fiber, too. Appreciate them in stir-fries or included in soups.

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ShutterstockYou do not need to burst out the spiralizer each time you desire a pasta replacement. Brand Names like Trader Joe's and also Green Giant sell spiralized zucchini, carrots, as well as more. Throw them with pasta sauce or stir-fry them for a low-carb dinner. Try your spiralized veggies in this dish for Zucchini Spaghetti with Turkey Meatballs.

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Table of ContentsFrozen Fruit Salad Things To Know Before You BuyThe Greatest Guide To Frozen BlueberriesSome Of Fresh Frozen Fruit

Diana Taliun/ShutterstockWhatever way you purchase itcanned, iced up, or freshcorn is a delicious means to include even more taste and also nutrients to your dish. Use icy corn in homemade salsas or white chili dishes. We enjoy these 20 Corn Recipes That Crush It. ShutterstockBroccoli is a great resource of vitamin C, vitamin A, and vitamin K.

Try roasting it with garlic or sauting it stovetop for an easy side dish. For a super-easy recipe, attempt these Broccoli-Cheese Eggs in a Cup. ShutterstockFresh cherries can be pricey, so maintaining the frozen variety on your shopping checklist is a should if you're trying to save money. Put the fruit to great use in this Wonderful and Luscious Chocolate-Covered Cherry Healthy Smoothie Dish Dish.

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Use it in any kind of recipes where you 'd make use of routine rice! These 20 Cauliflower Rice Recipes are a great location to begin. ShutterstockNo, you can not most likely to your favorite sushi area during quarantine, but you can still make a tasty bowl of edamame at residence. Just microwave some icy edamame, add a little salt, and you're good to go.

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George Dolgikh/ShutterstockYou do not need to wait up until Thanksgiving rolls around to appreciate a tasty side dish of Brussels sprouts. If you buy them iced up, they're wonderful at any time of year! Attempt cooking them with bacon for a yummy addition to any type of dish. Attempt the veggie in this Brussels Sprouts Garnished With Bacon as well as Almonds Recipe.

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They do not need to be baked right into a casseroleyou can prepare frozen environment-friendly beans for a straightforward side meal to any chicken supper. Try these 17 Good-for-You Eco-friendly Bean Recipes. ShutterstockAs with bananas, you might not find frozen grapes in your grocery shop. However you can freeze fresh grapes for a fast and simple reward! You can even use them to cool down your a glass of wine without sprinkling it downall of these usages are why grapes are one of the 50 Foods You have actually Been Eating Wrong Your Whole Life.

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Registered Dietitian and Nutritionist Ilana Muhlstein lost her weight and also maintained it offand in You Can Drop It!, she'll show you how to lose it, also. More than 240,000 customers have actually chosen her programand now it's yours to maintain.

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The potassium in cherries additionally makes them an excellent workout recovery snack (considering that potassium is an electrolyte), so Cascio says including them in a post-run or post-virtual exercise smoothie mix can assist nourish muscles. One study published in the European Journal of Sports Science found that cherry concentrate cause much less muscle mass pain post-workout. "Another fun reality regarding cherries is that they have melatonin, which is linked to better rest," Cascio states.

Associated Stories Okay, so you possibly aren't going on any tropical vacations anytime soon, yet a minimum of you can get a preference of somewhere beachy with this frozen fruit. "Even when fresh papaya is hard to obtain, virtually every supermarket has actually frozen papaya," Cascio states. She's a follower of this fruit due to the fact that of its fiber, vitamin C, as well as beta-carotene (a forerunner to vitamin A) web content.

" It has more than 200 percent of the quantity of vitamin C you require for the day." Take that, oranges. Cascio claims that papaya can also aid with irregularity as well as bloating because of the enzyme papin, which helps digest proteins. This makes it a terrific after-dinner snack. Try it by making vegan nice-cream; just utilize your blender or food Find more info processor or food cpu to mix your icy papaya with the plant-based milk of your option.

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( Or, follow this dish. It utilizes fresh papaya, yet frozen papaya functions simply as well.) Mango is another exotic fruit that isn't constantly simple to find fresh, however is available iced up at nearly every food store. Similar to papaya, Cascio says it additionally aids with digestion since it has plenty of probiotics and also fiber, both of which are essential completely digestive tract wellness.

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