#i’d have so many fucking nickels
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bob velseb, spooky month
Bob Velseb from Spooky Month is Kenough!
#this guy and patrick bateman would be friends i swear#if i had a nickel for every serial killer character#who became my favourite after my first watch#i’d have so many fucking nickels#which probably isn’t actually a lot#but it does show i need therapy#so that’s something i guess#maybe i can pay for it with all these nickels#real tags ->#your fave is kenough#your fave is#kenough#bob velseb#spooky month#bob spooky month
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it’s all the rest of what i want with you
connor dewar/brandon duhaime :: 8k
Summary:
“Brandon,” Connor says with a sigh. “There’s no baby in there.”
“Not yet,” Brandon says. Connor feels his stomach twist, almost like what he would imagine a baby kicking to feel like.
in these trying times of dewvorce, may i offer you 8k of pwp inspired by @stillfertile’s wonderful art which i had. several breakdowns about 🫶 anyway please enjoy!!!
#OFFICIAL FIC ANNOUNCEMENT 🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️ i wish i had pretty fic graphics but alas i have No Skill and also. so much work i should be doing bu#HI SHE’S HERE i would love to say this is a complete surprise drop except i have Anxiety & i needed to ask you guys about it beforehand#in my defense i started writing this in like. january far before any tragedy occurred#because square asked about my tags on their dewey2 art and she spawned like. a million more thoughts about it#including the part where i got absolutely kicked in the face with the lightning vision of those two lines.#like those two lines are the first actual lines of the fic i wrote ajdhkwdiowdjiw ANYWAY please be nice to me i know i am always like#‘this is not the first real fic i ever thought i’d post’ and if i had a nickel i’d have three but this is the first pwp i’ve ever posted#and it’s 8k and it’s not a fic for an exchange (although technically i did very much write this for the dewey^2 hivemind so.)#i have SO many things to say i have so many comments on this doc also i couldn’t pick a title for the LONGEST time and i finally decided on#this one but the full quote was too long:#all the rest of what i want with you that scares me shitless#so. i was angling SO hard to make a yung gravy lyric as a title bc i saw the video of him at a wild game but i couldn’t find a good one#and instead y’all got a very sentimental title l m a o.#liv in the replies#shout out to the extended universe this lives in and also my unhinged comments in the docs.#if you liked fun fuck a baby in him friday i’ll be here all week i promise i am the exact same in the comments as i am in the tags 🫡#the NUMBER of times i wrote something in this by pulling it out of my ass and then actually went back and did the research & was RIGHT is.#far too high. also the amount of coincidental things that dropped while i was writing this (yung gravy song about pregnancy AFTER i wheeze#laughed myself into a yung gravy title the athletic player poll confirming my restaurant & bar choices from googling ‘st. paul good bars’…)#also if anybody got advice on formatting for these little announcements. help. this is different from my miro/luka one &i’m still not happy
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me: i love everyone and I love hearing about different cultures and traditions and eating and sharing stuff!
Racist fuckers from the year 1900: you are the worst person ever I hope you die and (insert string of slurs) fuck your whore mother.
Me: w H A T
#-pop#Every single day#until I die#every SINGLE DAY UNTIL I DIE#why are people so awful#genuinely I was taught “hey don’t be racist <3 and be kind!” And then people start BASHING ME for literally doing that#holy shit you do not understand the amount of hatred and violence and shit I have seen.#me holding all AAPI people and fighting the bigots: WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS RACISTS#Me holding all AIPOC people and fighting the bigots: PLEASE STOP RACISTS#Me holding all the people from ethno-religions and fighting bigots: PLEASE HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THIS STOP RACISTS#Me holding all the marginalised people who don’t have a cool acronym and fighting the bigots: I AM SICK 0F THIS FUCK OFF RACISTS!#If I had a nickel for every single time I’ve seen racist shit#I’d have like 7000 dollars or something#Crying forever and always! (Sobbing hysterically)
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How are so many people mad at furries when disney is over here continuously ushering in new generations of furries one anthropomorphic character at a time
#they don’t even have to be anthropomorphic#there are so many animals movies#also if I had a nickel for every dog Disney made absurdly sexy? god I’d have to many fucking nickles bc what the hell Disney
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How do you say "yes I am aware I didn’t understand that but I don’t feel like putting the energy into actually understanding and you trying to explain it is just annoying me further because you are doing a horrible job, so please shut the fuck up and let it go, I don’t need to understand everything" without being rude
#asd#autism spectrum disorder#autism#if I had a fucking nickel#I’d have like 30 or so nickels#which is way too many#neurodivergent
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⋆ ˚。⋆౨ৎ˚ Encontrar tu media naranja
♥ pairing: lando norris x latina!fem!singer!reader
♥ synopsis: during one of your concerts a fan threw their phone up on stage. after you finished recording a video, you tried tossing it back to them and ended up accidentally hitting a world famous f1 driver in the face
♥ smau - none of the pictures are mine - face claim: alexa demie
♥ warnings: swearing, blood, accidental violence lol !!!
♥ a/n: if I had a nickel for every time I wrote a fanfic about finding love by getting hit in the face with object I'd have two nickels. which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice. + ignore spelling errors in my Spanish please some of it autocorrected lol
♥ masterlist
You turned your back towards the crowd as people cheered. You raised the phone in your hand up high to get as many people in the video as possible. After you ended the recording, you clicked the phone off and tried tossing it back to the original fan that threw it on stage.
There was an audible gasp from the crowd around the barricades as the phone hit a man's face. You covered your gaping mouth with your hand as you realized what you'd just done.
Your jaw was still dropped as you tried to speak.
"¿Estás bien?" you questioned.
(are you okay?)
You panicked internally as you tried to think of what to do.
"Can we get him some help?" you said, turning your gaze towards a few security guards.
"Todo el mundo por favor retroceda."
(everyone please stand back)
Security walked the man and his party out of the stadium rendering you absolutely speechless.
"Uhm," you said into the mic. "Did you get your phone back?" you asked the initial fan with an embarrassed expression.
liked by carlossainz55, oscarpiastri, and 743,684 more
landonorris aftermath
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yourusername IM SO SORRY I HOPE YOU'RE DOING OK
user6 HOW HARD DID SHE THROW THAT PHONE 😭😭😭
user9 miss girl can THROWWW
user1 y/n l/n baseball career when?
user7 girl needs to be pitching for the red sox, fuck 😭
user5 I feel so bad for laughing so hard
user10 the piss poor bandages on his nose-
user4 why is there so much blood holy shit
user12 didn't know Lando was a fan of her
user14 pretty sure Carlos dragged him to her concert lol
user2 not his friends laughing at him 💀
user18 someone drop the video
user16 is he okay?!?!
user17 meet cute 😍
user1 WHY IS THIS IS SO FUNNY
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, and 563,932 more
yourusername safe to say he forgave me
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user7 STUNNER
user1 you can throw a phone at my face any time 🤷♀️
user6 LANDO NOWINS NO MORE
user9 I will never get over this 😭
user18 it was just an inchident
user16 wait she wasn't wearing that while she was there??
user19 pretty sure that was a pic of her at whatever after parties they went to lol
user14 Florida nights are cold as fuck
user4 do you think Carlos is jealous of all the attention Lando is getting from her
user2 the poly fics write themselves
user10 oh my god YESSS!!!
user50 why does f1 invite celebrities that know nothing about the sport???
user12 not her wearing landos merch
user3 im sure he made her wear it lmaoo
user5 LANDO'S FIRST WIN
user17 P1 LETS FUCKING GO
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
-A Few Months Later-
liked by landonorris, yourbestfriend, and 238,849 more
yourusername @ landonorris
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carlossainz55 and this was the same guy who was complaining about going to her concert a few months ago
landonorris if I remember correctly that concert ended pretty badly for me
user12 you got a girlfriend out of it I’d call that a win
user40 @/user12 they're not dating ???
user10 find someone who smiles at you the way they smile at each other
user9 they’re so cute
user3 don’t be shy drop the picture(s) he took of her
user7 I need him I fear
user8 📱👃
user1 hes so cute
user13 just date already
user15 you're so pretty
user17 I will literally never forget her breaking his nose lmaooo
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
liked by landonorris, kaliuchis, carlossainz55, and 656,943 more
yourusername my new single "encontrar tu media naranja" is out now 🧡
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user8 ok but why does the guy in the music video look like lando...
user7 oh my god
user13 I see the vision
user9 YOURE ONTO SOMETHING
user1 Kali Uchis collab when?
user12 literally begging for a song with her, kali, and peso pluma
user3 orange sodas >>>
user24 📱👃
user11 this song is so good 🧡
user18 who's the guy in the mv???
user19 shes gorgeous
user17 I love her
user25 wait this is the singer that broke lando's nose
user5 🧡🧡🧡
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
liked by landonorris, yourbestfriend, carlossainz55 and 472,396 more
yourusername encontré a mi otra mitad
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landonorris te amo querida 🧡
yourusername 🧡
user5 bro's adorable
user2 encontrar tu media naranja? more like econtrar tu media papaya
user1 that's an interesting angle
user9 Lando still doesn't know how to make a heart with his hands lmao 😭
user7 I FUCKING KNEW IT !!!
user11 YESSS
user14 and now they're married with five kids
user18 mom and dad
carlossainz55 formally known as lando "who's y/n?"Norris
landonorris ive grown since then
user12 fuck Romeo and Juliet I want what they have
user6 so the song WAS about lando
user8 and it all started with a phone 📱
user10 I'm tearing up
#𝒍𝒊𝒗'𝒔 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌𝒔 ౨ৎ#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris fluff#ln4 x y/n#ln4 x reader#ln4 x you#ln4 imagine#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#formula 1 fic#formula 1 fanfic#formula one fic#formula one fanfic#lando norris x female reader#latina reader#singer reader#f1 rpf#rpf#fake tweets#fake texts
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Lucifer x Imp!Reader
warnings: imp bigotry, heavy topics, lowkey angsty (happy end, i swear)
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
• Secret relationship, baby!
• Let’s get into the hard part first, shall we? The discrimination of Imps isn’t something Lucifer set into motion. They helped him build Hell into what it is today—! Which is… flawed. Fuck, there’s no excuse. Know that he doesn’t condone it and he’s ashamed to admit he allowed it get this far
• That saying “history repeats itself”? Yeah, Hell isn’t immune
• It’s an elephant in the room situation when your and Lucifer’s feelings come into play. Along with the enormous power imbalance. He would never take advantage of that, by the way, but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s there
• Those issues are in the beginning though. Yes, it takes a lot of time and many painful conversations but now? Undoubtedly worth it
• Lucifer is quite proud of himself for the charade he concocted. You pose as his employee! No one would question it and you could hang around as much as you like! It’s perfect, right?
• “It sounds like a shitty romcom plot.” You snort
Lucifer’s smile is unwavering, eyebrows high on his face as he awaits what he longs to hear.
“But?”
Sighing, you softly return his smile, “It’s perfect.”
• And like a shitty romcom, it is
• Naturally, there’s ups and downs
• For Lucifer, the worst is that he hates keeping you a secret. It’s not that he wants to dish it live with Katie Killjoy and Tom Trench, he’s rather private as is, he’s just so— happy! He wants to show how proud he is to be yours! Unfortunately, that would do more harm for all of Hell. Selfish as his wants might be, he wouldn’t do that. Especially if it meant putting you in danger
• Occasionally he takes you to meetings and events. You try and slip into the background, supporting him from the shadows. Even from the other side of the room, Lucifer’s eyes will find you standing amongst the other Imps. He accidentally ends up ignoring whoever’s trying to rub elbows with the King of Hell
• (Honestly, it’s a miracle no one has found you two out yet. His longing gazes are far from subtle)
• Sometimes those outings don’t end well. A blue blooded dickbag might’ve dumped their drink on you or shoved you because you were “in the way” or berated you in front of everyone. Lucifer sees red and the entire event is cut short via a demonic rage. On a positive note, his publicity goes off the charts! “King of Hell defends his people, no matter the race!”
• (A motherfucking miracle, I tell you)
• Lucifer likes to take care of you when those incidents occur. He feels guilty. For everything. Reassuring him has always easy for you in any other situation. This one just bleeds into something personal. A failure
• So, you let him take care of you. It improves his mood bit by bit. Could be pancakes! No matter the time of day, Lucifer’s go-to are pancakes. (He’ll simply die all over again if you let him feed you too) Could be a bath for the two of you to share, he loves washing you and putting a bubble beard on your face
• Sleepovers can be a tad difficult to pull off but no one disturbs him in the mornings. He loves having you in his arms all night long. Kissing your horns, forehead, eyes, nose and lips— yes, in that order— before wishing you only the sweetest dreams
• Lucifer has a rubber duck that looks uncannily like you sitting on his desk at all times
• Oh! And despite being an Imp, you’re still taller than your beloved short king. It’s slight but he adores the difference
♡ a/n: if i had a nickel for every time a blue blood fell in love with an imp, i’d have /three nickels HAHAHA
#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel imagine#lucifer morningstar x reader#hazbin hotel lucifer x reader#lucifer morningstar headcanon#lucifer morningstar imagine#lucifer x reader#hazbin hotel lucifer
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how many of you thought this. show of hands now
Ohhhhhh captainsparklez had a vasectomy. That's where the you neutered him joke came from. I thought it was some elaborate shlarklez joke bc of how many times he got schlatt pregnant. Or something. This explains much.
i don’t even know how to respond to this. what do i even say to the concept of me having to neuter cjordan because he and schlatt wouldn’t stop fucking like goddamn rabbits
#icarus speaks#if i had a nickel for every time i’ve had someone assume i just. made this bit up for shits and giggles#instead of it having been my followers’ fault and stemming from an actual choice ccjordan made#i’d have way too many fucking nickels#which is a lot and insane that it’s happened so many times 😭
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If I had a nickel for every time a main character watched their best friend/lover’s heart get ripped out and watched them die… I’d have so many fucking nickels
#bkdk#itafushi#bakudeku#I was making a joke about the similarities between bkdk and itafushi#then I realised that I love OUAT#and ripping peoples hearts out is like#OUAT’s whole thing#wow I have so many nickels#I might buy a mansion
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So here’s the thing,
Being visibly queer to the point of ostracism is historically synonymous with gender nonconformity and I don’t think that’s a conversation some are ready to have.
Gender nonconformity as it pertains to Stede is a hot button topic of debate in the fandom rn, and I love that! So much! Queer theory shit is in right now? Sign me tf up! But I see a lot of posts answering “no” to “does Stede wear feminine clothing?” as if it’s the same question. It’s also being talked about as a binary “to be” or “not to be” as if gender nonconformity is not a concept experienced on a spectrum.
Even if Stede’s clothing can be considered reasonably “masculine” with all the anachronisms, picking flowers, not being able to stomach a “man’s” job, and wearing robes that cause other characters to misgender him are harder sells. The number one thing I see the “Stede is NOT gnc” side say is that these things are only associated with femininity if you’re seeing them from a stereotypical lense. And well… yah. Gender nonconformity is a social construct. That’s what a social construct is. Enjoying bright colors, preferring non-confrontational solutions, wearing a skirt, having long hair, these are all things that are not biologically innate to women. They’re extra characteristics our society uses to construct the idea of a woman. That’s also why gender nonconformity hinges on the cultural context as well. Different societies, different rules.
In order to understand where people are coming from when they say Stede is gnc and use the queerphobia he experiences as evidence, you have to look at the metaphysics. What is homophobia in its original form? What is it made of? I’d argue it’s purest components are the fear that the divides between men and women will break down. It’s considered “an abomination” because sleeping with a man is seen as the natural duty of a woman, and for women, sleeping with a man. Beyond that, all of the baggage that comes with those extra characteristics I mentioned follows suit. Lesbians were by and large excluded from womanhood, in some points of history specifically bottoming was illegal because it was “placing yourself in a woman’s position”, etc.
And that’s not to say masc gay men don’t experience homophobia, they absolutely do. I’m just saying if Stede is experiencing specifically the same bigotry as non-passing queer people do in the form of being excluded from his own gender and even from others in his group, then I don’t think he’s one of those men.
Honestly a thousand kudos to @eluciferate for already bringing Albert from “The Birdcage” to the conversation. Cause he really is the perfect example of not only gender nonconformity beyond the literal surface, but the fact that for many it’s a state of being rather than a conscious choice of queer empowerment. When Albert’s son brings home a girl with very conservative parents, and Albert attempts to “play straight” for his sake… he can’t do it. Even in ultra masculine clothes and trying his best, the nonconformity shines through like toes poking out of old shoes.
Fuck, Stede wasn’t kidding when he said he was “uncomfortable in a married state”. Even the way he carries himself back home looks carefully minded, like his whole life is a play he was horribly miscast for. In other words sometimes you didn’t purposely decide to stick it to the heteronormative man. Sometimes with great gayness comes great responsibility and that’s that.
Jokes aside, we can nickel and dime all his frilly little affects all we want, but at the end of the day Stede is gender nonconforming in a way that goes beyond aesthetic. And I think a lot of people may be hesitant to read him this way because it requires you to acknowledge homophobia in the show, that Stede’s queerness is commented on and something he actively has to mind before even knowing what it is.
#our flag means death#ofmd#stede bonnet#gnc#gender nonconformity#queer theory#meta#analysis#1x04#1x08#1x01#the birdcage#biceratops
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Bro How’d I Do This?
If I had a nickel for everyone my favourite character in a Hellaverse show:
- Was played by an actor I previously knew about and adored
- Had white skin with red facial markings
- Had like black/dark grey arms and legs (Luci’s are accessories I’m pretty sure, but still the black limbs on white body base is like MMM)
- Became increasingly hotter the more clothing they removed (I’m a simp for jacketless Luci and ripped shirt Fizz)
- Sang my favourite songs of said show
- Was famous in said show but didn’t really enjoy it
- Had a tragic backstory
- Was not mentally doing okay
- Had really cute shortened nicknames
- Was expected by the entire fandom to be an asshole but ended up being just the most adorable little guy
- Completely stole the show for the little amount of screen time they have gotten so far in their respective shows
- Had fun powers/abilities that tickle my brain fantastically (Luci’s pretty golden magic and wings and demon form, and Fizz being like ultra-stretchy 1000. You can’t tell me both of those aren’t completely enjoyable)
I’d have two motherfucking nickels, which isn’t a lot, but HOW THE FUCK DID THAT ALL HAPPEN TWICE?! (And all of that is just canon shit! There are so many more ways they connect in my headcanons)
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel lucifer#lucifer hazbin hotel#i love luci#tumblr sexyman#apple daddy#lucifer#duck lord#short king#helluva boss#helluva boss fizzarolli#fizzarolli#stretchy baby#the angst kings#most adorable#glorious#hot motherfuckers#with stellar voices#like seriously hid did this happen?#it’s so specific#seriously tho more I think about them#the more they have in common
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BITCHASS COPS GET SQUISHED BY THE DROPLET STAND
sO JUST IN TIME FOR JOJOLANDS I FINISHED PART 8, LETS GET THIS LIVEBLOG STARTED >:D
#oh my god it’s so fucking shaped I LOVE IT#I WANT ITS GENDER RIGHT NOW#if I had a nickel for every time araki said acab I don’t know how many nickels I’d have and that brings me so much joy#jojolands spoilers
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If I had a nickel for every time I was obsessed with a show/book/podcast with lots of eye imagery, I’d have SO MANY FUCKING NICKELS.
#the magnus archives#tma#tma podcast#welcome to night vale#wtnv#life series#watcher grian#toh#the owl house#the bible#there’s more I know I’m just blanking
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Pardon the double ask, I’d also love to hear your thoughts on some Inanimate Insanity questions if you wouldn’t mind!
Thoughts on the Shimmers? [I personally find them super fascinating but there’s so little lore to chew on!]
The MePad tragedy… Do you think they could fix him, seeing as they have two very capable people who already built a whole person?? [You can probably guess my thoughts on this XD]
Favourite charcter(s)/character dynamics? I myself have a soft spot for the begrudging-turned-close friendships we see, like with Nickel and Balloon, MePhone and Floory, and Lightbulb and Paintbrush!
I'll do this ask first cause i wanna spice things up and talk about ii now.
Thoughts on the Shimmers? If i'm being honest i don't have any strong feelings about them. when i was watching ii i did get spoiled on bots new look and the whole time i was just like "oh they must come from that egg!" and then the egg became an egg creature from an egg species. So i was just like "OK I GUESS WE DOING CIRCLES NOW????". I was hoping for a really cool looking alien design, but i accepted that they are just eggs. I'm crossing my fingers for the next season to talk about their lore more, and just other alien species maybe since now it is confirmed there are more then just cobs and ii. How did cobs know about the shimmer? was he a fucking space war criminal??? there must be more objects out there that's not made by mephone. it honestly makes me really excited!!! i know they're not going to go straight onto the lore stuff for season 4, but i'm just so excited on who would even be the HOST next season, is there even gonna be a host???? SO MANY QUESTIONS AND IM EATING THEM UP!!!
Thoughts on MePads Death: mepads death was very much a shock for me, i'm in the ballpark where there's no way they're just going to leave him dead, cobs is dead, they can raid his place for parts. there's test tube that can save him. like there's so many variables that CAN save him it just makes sense that he would come back. But they can also be fucked up and evil, keep on going on the theme with "death is forever now" and that starts with mepad. I fear mepad is just another one of those burning questions i can't wait to see get answered on season 4
Favorite character(s)/character dynamics: OH JOY HOW I LOVE THESE CHARACTERS! i do love the bright lights group a lot, fan, test tube, paint brush and lightbulb. Have a soft spot for the final 2, suitcase and knife, but i think that's just because I've been around them the most the whole season. LOVE bot, floor, mepad and mephone4. I'm also very smitten on mephone3gs, i love his whole "space adventuring super hero from the 50s" voice, it's the right amount of cheese for me and i eat it up. My favorite dynamics are just the same fav characters i listed. fan and test tube are just two autistic nerds in love. paint brush and light bulb is a dynamic i constantly eat up "the hot head and they happy one". when i saw them i knew ii got me and there was no escape from my predictable self. i do actually like knife and pickle a lot! mephone4 and 3gs is a dynamic i can't wait to see in the next season. mephone got a new older brother thats a badass space adventuring super hero LIKE COME ON THATS SO CUTE. the last scene with them hugging literally makes me tear up every time. I can only just imagine, depressed mephone just like eating his life away on the couch and sg3 is just trying to help him with his space captain attitude.
anyway here's this little doodle of my fav group that i forgot to post
#hoodedjelly ask#inanimate insanity#ii test tube#ii fan#ii paint brush#ii light bulb#fan is the fav character overall and me writing all of these asks just make me feel like him and his blog haha
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Dear genius;; do you perhaps have more headcanons for Otis with Baby's best friend? Just anything!! ;;w;
-meadow! My dear friend hello again :D! I truly hope you enjoy these (givin me my favorite tropes, i see what your doin 😁)
anyways, I hope you enjoy these!! —
So. Much. FLIRTING.
and not just regular flirting, though. Oh No no no.
what? You thought OTIS could flirt normally? No. That man’s shoving a live human heart in your face, while telling you how nice and soft your precious skin looks.
lemmie tell you this, if your baby’s best friend, you’ve either been with her from the beginning, or your just a morbid person and they kept you around for that.
and if you’ve been with her from the beginning? You can at least tolerate morbid stuff.
so there’s a lot of…dark flirting.
example:
“I’d love to cut you up and make a masterpiece outta you, doll”
“I’d let you do it.”
definitely also makes you little gifts. Like, little portraits of you, figures made of bone or cartilage.
puts his hand on your shoulder a lot. Your his, and he needs others to know that. (you just don’t know it yet, and he probably doesn’t either)
otis is also a very blunt person, so he’s more than likely invited you to his bed more than once
”yknow sweetheart, my beds always open for you”
often uses you as his muse, blatantly telling you it’s because your hot/pretty as fuck.
you two probably have rant sessions too.Your mad about something, he’s mad about something, so you both just vent to eachother about it.
you laying on his bed, him pacing around. Your waiting for him to finish so you can console him, then go on with your own rant,
which you know he’d be there to listen to. After you listen to him ofc.
”can’t believe tiny almost let my muse escape! Do you know how long it took for me to get this detrimental wall of art block broken down? Fucking, forever!! If it wasn’t for me being there, just in time, that bitch would’ve ran away!”
so many late nights spent outside when neither of you can sleep, so you just talk.
talking about anything and everything, till eventually one of you falls asleep (typically you)
and by saying that, there’s been a few times where you woken up in Otis’s bed while he’s passed out on the very edge of the bed.
hes a sadistic, psychotic, homicidal maniac, but for some reason, you, baby’s best friend, the one person he’s NOT supposed to be kind, and all that gooey stuff with, makes him want to be nice to you.
doesn’t want to actually carve your face off
he wishes to keep it on your pretty/handsome face :((
lots of meaningless banter —
”your face is dumb”
”yeah? Well you have more wrinkles than my grandmother”
”oh really? Well- your probably not even a natural blond!”
*LE GASP*
HORROR MOVIE MARATHONS. y’all will stay up ALL night watching shitty old horror movies and criticizing it
saying how fake and un real it is
”the gore is so fake, I mean cmon!!”
“…idk, the gore is pretty good, but the acting is shit.”
“You think that’s real gore? Gimme a second sweetheart, LEMMIE go grab my muse. I’ll show you real gore!”
”OTIS NO WHAT ABOUT THE MOVI-“
yeah. You’ll have to clean up all the blood btw.
man is caked in layers of blood, and constantly smells of Pennys and nickels.
ITS SO LATE RN BUT I HOPE YOU LIKE THESE IVE POURED SO MANY HUMAN EMOTIONS INTO THIS-
#otis driftwood#otis driftwood x reader#otis firefly#house of 1000 corpses#house of 1000 corpses x reader#Ask#otis#driftwood#x reader#babys best friend
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So now that i have learnt that asking u questions will not make u want to brutally murder me, ITS MY TURN AAAHAHHAHAHAH-
Numéro Un : Whats ur main's lore??? The parasite dudeeeeeeeeee >:))))
Numara İki : Who is your least and most fav battler from ALL of RBB (its not the same question i swear!!!!!!!!)
Numero Tatlo : Give the finalists a scent or/and a song.
Numero Cuatro : Will we see more of Lana, Bella and Hoopie?? I needed to ask this for the girliessss (btw from clues left around here and there, im guessing Bella and Steak are shapeshifters???)
Nummer Fünf : KREEK GOT POSSESED BY BILL CIPHER- is the guy ok 😞😞😞💔💔💔 How often will we see TMA x RBB?? Like how many more are u expecting atm???
Numero Sei : This one is abt BLSMP, kinda like mini questions;
Will we see Megan in action of vengeance soon?
Will Pink get his cookie??
Russo.
How long will day 6 and 7 be? Like chapters and chapter lenght????
-. ..- -- -... . .-. / --... : Are you overworking yourself? Yk if you are, just for our entertainment. Stop. Take a breather. Its not worth it <3
HAVE A SMOOTH DAY BYEEEE >:DDDD
bugbo. im sorry i had to 😰😰😞😞😞💔💔💔💔🤯🤯🤯😭😭😭😭👹👹👹🥰🥰🥰
( why am i like this )
Why are there Bin Weevils in my askbox. Anyway, answers to your questions under the cut!!
Question 1: C!YanDan is…something, certainly. He was formed by negative energy generated when a crystal exploded (if you know, you know), and that negative energy cloud possessed a malnourished unused clone in the basement of a laboratory in the woods. He dislikes DanTDM on principle, but like, he’s only met the guy once. These days, he’s just a hitman who gets sent out on slightly more unscrupulous jobs, alongside his friends. You can find his reference, as well as his two friend’s references, here, here and here. There’s also their boss, but I haven’t uploaded him yet.
Question 2: Least favourite, uh, the ones who’ve turned out to be not-nice people behind the scenes, I guess? You know the ones. Favourite is probably Tanqr and Kreek, because I’m basic as fuck. But also, underrated favourites are Hyper, Jackeryz and Calixo. Oh, Think, Preston and BigB are also up there, but I like them for other reasons.
Question 3: I’m going to do songs because I don’t know scents all too well. Some of these I am very certain of, some of these are just flat out vibes.
KreekCraft: The Main Character - Will Wood
Tanqr: Ruthlessness - EPIC: The Musical
DylanHyper: Waiting In The Wings - Tangled: The Series
AshleyTheUnicorn: Get Down - Six: The Musical
PinkLeaf: No More: LongestSoloEver
iBella: Gon’ be real I don’t have a song in mind for Bella. Most of the songs I listen to don’t really fit her.
DenisDaily: Vending Machine of Love: The Stupendium
Question 4: That depends on what universe you’re asking about. Lana and Bella have major roles in the TMA AU, so they’ll likely appear more there! Bella’s also pretty important to some of my other AUs, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. Hoopie, meanwhile…I don’t really include her? Mainly because I don’t fukcing know what her and Tanqr have going on. Are they dating? Are they just friends? I don’t know how she fits in. In my take on canon, I have them in a weird situationship where they don’t even know what they are. So…yeah.
Question 4.5: Correct on Bella - she is a shapeshifter! Her knowledge on human anatomy has gotten a lot better, but that accursed Rthro render was the result when she…didn’t. Steak, meanwhile, is just a slab of meat. He doesn’t have bones. He doesn’t have hair. He just has meat slabs carved (and skin) to look vaguely human. (His hair’s texture is either cartilage or leather, I haven’t decided).
Question 5: If I had a nickel for every time Hunt!Kreek was referred to as Bill Cipher, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it’s happened twice, right? In all seriousness, no, he is not okay. The TMA AU (at least, Kreek’s side of it) can basically be summarised by “one man (Kreek) gets haunted by and slowly turns into a fucked up version of his YouTube channel mascot” and with that comes a major sanity slippage. I’d love to release more TMA AU content, and I do have some stored! It just depends on my motivation and what I want to release. Right now I’m working on writing a full plot outline to make my life easier when talking about it, but it’s taking some time.
Question 6: Bold of you to assume she hasn’t already done that. In fact, in the next chapter, I’d say she’s about to do the exact opposite.
Question 6.25: Once Ashley is in a situation where she knows how to make one.
Question 6.5: Russo, what are you doing. RUSSO NO-
Question 6.75: Day 6 has 7 chapters, Day 7 has 6 (planned, subject to change). Word count depends on what happens in them - some of the Day 6 chapters have a LOT GOING ON.
-. . …- . .-. / --. --- -. -. .- / --. .. …- . / -.-- --- ..- / ..- .—. : I think I’m fine!! I’m doing a lot of work right now because I’m gonna be quite busy with life during the next year when things pick up, so you know, getting ahead of the game. I’ve gone from being 2 chapters ahead to being 7, so I’m pretty proud of that. Then again, literally 30 minutes after I read this ask I managed to spill boiling water all over my hand and now I can’t really type, so…there’s that.
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