#i would literally die for bebe. and i would also probably die if i ever met her

[imagionationstation]

I would LOVE to hear more about your gender swapped Donnie! (It’s one of my favorite tropes!) I can just imagine her with her mask tails tied back in a big bow so they don’t get in the way while she’s working.

Also, I know you write a lot of de-aged Donnie, have you considered her bros reaction if she was turned into a baby? Would it actually be any different than for normal Donnie?

Thank you! I would LOVE to rant about her!

She WOULD though! Thank you so much for that character inspiration because that is absolutely perfect canon now. Her reasoning is that she wants to keep her mask tails out of the way when she's working with delicate or difficult experiments, but she also just likes having them up in a bow. She often forgets when they're tied like that and Mikey uses it as an excuse to play with them.

Braids don't really work with the minuscule fabric, but neither turtle is particularly worried about it. I can see Donnie propped on the couch working on her laptop and Mikey sitting cross-legged behind her, single-handedly discovering every single way to tie a bow/knot as he watches whatever show is on the tv.

Literally, baby Dee has been on my mind way too often as this AU has been taking shape. GAH. Precious creature. 💜

Hmmm... I think it depends?

If we're talking a Lone Rat And Cubs baby...

Male turtles are very territorial over their females. We add that in with the human male instinct to protect small humans/females. Plus the fact that their sister has gone from a brash teen to a tiny, confused, vulnerable child with a shell that can fit in the palm of their hand-

The first reaction would obviously be panic.

If the change happens in public, big bro instincts are cranked all the way up. White eyes, small huddle, hissing, not letting any being outside the turtle social circle close (sorry Master Splinter). Mikey doesn't know what this new emotion is, but he's about to punch everyone in the near vicinity if they so much as look at her wrong. They'll come around eventually, but only once they find a moment to escape into solitude and actually process what happened to Donnie.

If it happens in private, they're going to be more concerned about the fact that, yk, she a baby. After a completely normal freak-out, there's a lot of nuzzles and cooing and debating if other people should be involved in the fact that she tiny. It's more likely that they'll come around quickly in this instance, but there will be lots of hovering.

There will probably be lots of hovering in any instance.

I like to be silly with the idea that Leo would be overprotective, but I deem each brother an unreasonable, defensive mess.

Other than that...

I think I wouldn't change very much about baby care.

They'd care for Dona in the same way that they'd care for Don. A lot of trying to keep her grabby hands away from explode-y things or large objects so she doesn't die before they can turn her into a teen again. They have to be careful when putting her down because she will take off when they blink and suddenly end up under a bed or splashing in one of the pools around the lair.

The most untrustworthy of bebe turtles.

She also has a bad habit of sticking things in her mouth. Anything. Everything. Doesn't matter if it's humanly possible to fit or not. She will experiment and she will find out for herself.

No one knows how she gets her hands on half the things that she does. She was born in the ways of the ninja snatch.

(I like to imagine that Donnie was downright awful at keeping anything that she ever wore clean. She was consistently staining every outfit that was ever put on her to the point that Splinter stopped trying. It's not like she would be any less modest than her brothers. They had their shells and he left it at that.)

None of them grew up with clothes, so the brothers don't quite understand why April deems it necessary to drag out her old stuff and try to match outfits for the lil' turtle, paired with an absurd number of headbands/bows. She claims that they're only to help keep her warm, but they can't help but notice that she's weirdly invested. And if Karai's around at the time, they're even more baffled that she's all in on the dress-up, with far more 'superior' clothing, usually black or grayed with gothic imagery.

And Donnie's so small that even with the shell, they manage to find adorable, comfortable things that can fit her.

The brothers are left scratching their heads at them being so insistent at using her like a doll. Yeah, sure, she's cute, but she's also cute without them so what's the big deal...?

The girls get snippy when the brothers question it, so they quickly back off. As a baby, Dona has no opinion, content to let it happen.

All of them end up getting pictures.

(Not entirely for blackmail purposes 💜)

[theautistichalflinghole]

Fanfic concepts that im like 99% sure I'll never write (because im not a writer [yet]) but im writing them down in the hopes that someone will/has

they say you should manifest what you want so im just gonna write ideas, post it when i fall asleep and then add to it later with reblogs (if any of these exist or get written please reblog or ask to let me know and I will love you forever)

a fic with any combination of kujou sara/ei/yae miko/sangonomiya kokomi where sara is injured in battle and put into a coma or some sort of vunerable life threatening status, hurt comfort obviously becuase i cannot handle unhappy endings, preferably pre relationship so some realizations can occur, this probably wouldnt be too hard to find but there are some specific scenarious I imagine within this one such as: ei finding out about saras injury and shooting across inazuma in the form of lightening to get her, a little bit of political conflict if she were to get injured in watatsumi and is in kokomis care, and i did say any conflict but preferabbly all four??

kaebedo meeting as kids (rhinedottir wants to socialize her new experiment or kaeya goes about wandering the palace and finds him, what have you) and then recognizing eachother (or only albedo doing so) when A joins the knights

ORRR consider bebe kaeya meeting a prototype of albedo (rubedo fic writers im looking at you) who looks exactly the same so he is freaking out and albedo has no fucking idea why (and then, once they start dating, rubedo shows up and does... something)

razor/bennet/fischl sic fic where bennys bad luck makes it so he and fischl have medical procedues scheduled on the same day, and everyone else except for razor are busy while theyre in recovery, cute little sic fic opportunity, this can honestly work for any sort of illness or medical issue that makes you loopy or in pain but i personally would love t4t4t where fischl and benny are both recovering from un reschedulable top surgery

i know i literally just said i hate unhappy endings but consider... xiaoven ( or honestly any ship w/ xiao but thats the one i like) where xiao always expected to die and leave venti in mourning so he pushes him away.... and then venti fucking dies (or goes into eepy time for a while if you want amiguous or happy ending)

just more venti sleep fics, but specifically venti unexpectedly goes into one of his sleeps and his partner has to wait for him, not knowing if hell wake up in a few days a few years a few hundred years or ever... also consider venti falling asleep with his partner saying theyll wait for him, and then them being long dead/gone (opportunity for a reincarnation fic) (this one defiently exists in some form with multiple ships but like... papa me want more movie, also hard to fine because like what tags do i even search for with this is there a tag for venti goes to eepy?? "a mirmir venti (genshin impact)" )

Scara ship fic (chiscara??? please???) where they truly do not remember scara at all, no random tears no familiar feelings or suspicion, hes been entierly wiped. a bit of angst and mourning from scara before he decides he cant accept this and tries to make the first move and they slowly fall in love again. (Literally every fic ive read of chiscara has childe make the first move and I understand its because scara is the most emotionally constipated man to ever be written but I feel like them already being in a relationship pre wipe+ the backstory of him having lots of time in sumeru to heal would make it not tooo ooc)

[serenasoutherlyns]

part two of these two 😍

[paranormal-pajama-phantom]

Hi hello! May I request a ship?:)

My name is Xena and I’m 5’5, INTJ-T and I go by any pronouns and Omni :)). I’m a Libra / September baby. I’m Latine and have wavy brown hair that barely go past my shoulders, brown eyes and olive skin(I tan pretty quick in the summer too if that’s important) and I’m mid size (full thighs&ass and bit of chub on my stomach & round-ish cheeks) my cheeks are naturally pink too, I wear small square glasses, and my main clothing style is normally a loose crop top, jeans and a hoodie around my waist

I would say my personality is a mix depending on the person. I love to help people as much as I can but I tend to put myself second because of it. With new people I’m very sweet and polite because I’d hate to have a bad impression. But once I’m used to someone I’m very loud and lively. I can be a bit cocky but I love to tease. With people I dislike I try to civil but René to ignore them especially if they’re very discriminatory or think too highly of themselves & puts others down. But with my s/o I can be very affectionate (it’s just I’m sometimes embarrassed to do so 🥲) I hate the feeling of being lonely or to be excluded. I’m very physical with my loved ones, I enjoy to give out hugs, link arms or hold hands with them. Prepping/teasing my s/o kisses is also up there :)). My hobbies are writing fics, drawing or doing a small project when it comes to mind. In my academics I’m really good with physics and maths, and English is one of my top five classes, idk something about numbers and writing makes me feel calm for pet-name i do like the simple ones like “love, sweetie, honey, my sweet, lovely” as I’d call them “mi amor, bebe, cariño”

(If you can do the Marvel that would be awesome also my pref can be anyone so & it might not be important but my type are sweet nerds keireodirhdj:))

hehe sweet nerds you sawy seems like you're a perfect match for

..................❣🕷SPIDER MAN🕷❣.................

         General headcanons🕸

Literally never forgets when you’re birthday is and probably spends the whole month of august planning for your birthday in september 

He likes to play with your hair when he gets bored 

He’ll even brush it if you let him 

Since you said you tan pretty quickly he will force you to put on sunscreen so you don’t burn >:( 

Probably steals your hoodies

Pls cuddle with him he is touch starved

Date Headcanons🌠

Cozy at home dates! 

He’ll set up his kitchen with some candles and start preparing whatever foods you like

He’ll also string up some LED lights to make it even better

Don’t be surprised if he also puts on soft music in the background

Peter is very cheesy :3 

But he just wants to give you the perfect date!

Romantic headcanons💓

If Peter notices that you’re embarrassed he’ll usually make the first move and wrap his arm around you or kiss you

Peter’s go to nickname is usually ‘sweetie’ and he’ll basically replace your name with it 

If he ever thinks you’re neglecting yourself to take care of other people he’ll usually step in and gently let you know

Peter literally will always include you and rarely goes anywhere without you 

Can and will be your emotional support puppy in trying times 

Please don’t tease him, he will die

Height headcanons✨

I headcanons him to be about 5'7 so while he isn't towering over you he's still a few inches taller than you

uses this to his advantage to become big spoon

He enjoys the subtle height difference when he's hold your hand

Bonus round🎉

If you ever decide to draw Peter/Spiderman and he comes across it he’ll literally just start freezing up and blushing, overall just acting flustered and confused. But deep down it makes him feel good about himself because he inspired you to create something so wonderful. Same thing goes with fics

Incorrect quote🫧 (Just for funsies)

Peter Parker: Fruits that do not live up to their names; passionfruit, grapefruit, honeydew and dragonfruit. Peter Parker: Fruits that do live up to their names? Peter Parker: Orange.

Thank you for waiting so long! I know it took me a while but hopefully it was worth it <3

Come back soon! 💌

[derivativealigner]

Well I haven’t watched sp all the way through for about a decade now, so I thought it was time

Sometimes I wonder how accurate the fandom is when it comes to how we interpret the characters. Like, why is Stan a football star so often in fanfic and why’s Kyle always the smart one? So I thought I’d rewatch the show and make notes along the way to see where the source of all these interpretations is. I also wanted to see if I could get some fun info to analyze, but season 1 is pretty sparse in that regard so there’s not too much of that in this post, but I’ll make a post for all the other seasons too as I watch them

In summary, it’s established in season 1 already that Stan’s a star quarterback and an animal lover, Kyle’s an A+ student, and Kenny is poor and knows a lot about sex and doesn’t have many qualms about doing crazy shit. Cartman is a bit weird since he’s mostly just a naive brat in this season, but he and Kyle have a mildly antagonistic friendship already

I have all my notes under this cut. They include a bunch of small details and other observations. I also listed every Kenny death just because

Ike has freckles

Cartman says “Weak!” and “You guys” and “Seriously” a lot from the start, also “Kickass!” He doesn’t say weak or kickass much in the later seasons iirc

Stan says “Dude, this is pretty fucked up right here” three times in this season but they dropped that catchphrase pretty quickly

Bebe got named in episode 2

Stan’s been an animal lover since s01e03 Volcano since he won’t shoot a bunny or anything else. He does shoot Scuzzlebutt at the end though

Cartman’s a pathological liar but in a childish way

Randy got named in s01e03 Volcano (and it only got worse from there)

The mayor went to Princeton

South Park is next to Mt. Evanson

Kenny will literally drink gasoline

Stan’s a star quarterback in 3rd grade

Clyde’s voice is wrong as hell in S01E04 Big Gay Al’s Big Gay Boat Ride and he has a dog, Rex

Garrison says Kyle is an A+ kid

Shelly seriously abuses Stan, punching him, throwing him, maiming him with a lawnmower

Cartman had a pot-bellied pig called Fluffy

Cartman’s mom smokes crack and has sex with strange men

Dr. Mephesto is probably a Buddhist since he says “Thank Buddha” instead of “Thank God”

Clyde’s voice gets kind of fixed in S01E06

A guy called Mr. McCormick is killed in a protest, launched and splattered against a network building. He doesn’t look like Kenny’s dad though

Zombie Clyde attacks Bebe, rude

Wendy gave her costume contest prize (2 tons of candy) to hungry children in Nairobi

Cartman’s mom is on the cover of Crack Whore magazine. “Back do’ ho… Five on one action!” is the headline

Cartman genuinely cries at Kenny’s grave after the whole zombie thing but gets over it because of candy

Stan knows his mom’s credit card number and has no problem using it to adopt an Ethiopian child (the boys wanted a watch that came with the adoption, they weren’t doing it to be nice)

Cartman calls Stan a vas deference, Stan doesn’t know what that is so Kenny says “Dude, it’s a pipe for your peepee” (according to a transcript). Kenny sure knows male anatomy

Kyle sniffs Kenny after Cartman asks why poor people smell like sour milk and Garrison says “idk eric they just do”

Cartman thinks poor people should die and decrease the surplus population

When the boys get Starvin’ Marvin delivered to them, Cartman says “Hey mom, we found an Ethiopian, can we keep him?” and his mom says “Sure, hun.” She rarely says no to Cartman

Kenny’s dad is an alcoholic who drinks scotch according to Cartman. I mean, Mr. McCormick is seen drinking in multiple episodes and has a hat that says SCOTCH so it’s probably true

Kenny’s family says grace

Craig’s first appearance is S01E09. Also, S01E09 is the first time Kenny doesn’t die (Coincidence? I THINK yeah but it’s still fun)

Clyde got named in S01E10

Clyde and Bebe both spit on Pip’s face, friendship goals <3

Cartman and Kyle have their first fight at Cartman’s birthday party because Kyle didn’t give the right gift. Cartman slaps his face and  screams “I hate you! I want you to die! Die!” while on top of Kyle who’s not really fighting back

Satan throws a fight with Jesus after everyone except Satan bet that Jesus would lose, which leads to Satan winning everyone’s money. Mr. Garrison says “What a mean thing to do!” and Jimbo says “He is a jerk!” and I thought it was quite a laugh so I wrote it down

In S01E11 Tom’s Rhinoplasty Bebe and Wendy are sitting in the swings together and generally appear together throughout the episode, then Bebe gives Wendy a makeover so they’re bffs obviously <3

Craig first appears in the classroom, though not sitting down, in S01E11

Wendy’s not happy about Ms. Ellen taking Stan away from her, she says “Don’t fuck with me! Stay away from my man, bitch, or I’ll whoop your sorry ho ass back to last year!”

Kenny gives Ms. Ellen a scrumptious looking sausage as a valentine’s gift and giggles deviously. Wendy’s gift to Ms. Ellen is a dead animal

Even Kenny doesn’t know what a lesbian is

Wendy’s grandma died in S01E11

Wendy gets Ms. Ellen killed by hiring the Iraqi government (?) to put her in a rocket and shoot it into the sun, then she and Bebe have a pool party (very cool, they wear sunglasses 😎) and watch the rocket hit the sun

Cartman and Pip play a game of kicking each other in the nuts until someone falls. Cartman calls it “Roshambo”

Kenny has a sack of marbles

The boys aren’t fans of Barbra Streisand, but Stan is a fan of the Denver Broncos quarterback John Elway (he’s not a quarterback anymore, he’s an American football executive and the president of football operations for the Denver Broncos of the NFL according to wikipedia.)

Officer Barbrady is a fan of Fiona Apple (who was 20 at the time and had only one album released called Tidal)

Ned knows how to pilot a helicopter

Kyle’s mom is a fan of Streisand unlike literally everyone else, she even gets an autograph from Mecha Streisand

The boys are fans of Robert Smith, the lead singer of The Cure. Stan says “Robert Smith is the greatest person that ever lived!” and Kyle says “Disintegration is the best album ever!” and Cartman says “Robert Smith kicks ass!” and Kenny’s dead so he doesn’t get to have an opinion

Cartman has tea parties with his toys: Polly Prissypants, Clyde frog, Peter Panda, and a dragon called Rumpertumskin

Kyle wants to make fun of Cartman for the tea party but Stan stops him because he’s concerned that Cartman needs help

Craig is in front of the school counselor’s office in S01E13

A young miss Cartman drinks like a motherfucker at the 12th annual drunken barn dance where Cartman was supposedly conceived

Stan lets Cartman borrow his bike like a good friend

Garrison wanted to have a threesome with Chef and Cartman’s mom. I don’t know why I’m making a note of this but uh… yeah.

Cartman’s mom has had sex with everyone at this bar that Garrison’s drinking at, including principle Victoria, the mayor, Father Maxi, and Jesus (and maybe Kenny’s dad since he’s at the bar but the camera doesn’t pan to him when Garrison says they’ve all slept with Liane). Later Gerald Broflovski is a possible father to Eric, so he fucked her too. Also Mr. Mephesto and his friend Kevin, that little guy, are candidates along with a lot of other people, including the 1989 Denver Broncos (and Mr. Tenorman is included in that later)

Cartman doesn’t make fun of Kyle for being Jewish much at all in this season even though the Christmas episode is all about Kyle not celebrating

Clyde and Token appear very early on and Clyde has always been in the classroom (along with Bebe, Red, Kevin Stoley, Wendy, and Pip and uhh DogPoo too I think). Craig appears later in the season and Tweek’s not in season 1 at all, so Craig’s gang isn’t really a thing yet

And here’s a list of the ways Kenny died in this season. He dies in every episode except episode 9, and he dies twice in episodes 2 and 3. Altogether he dies 14 times

S01E01 Killed after alien shoots him, cows stampede over him, then cop runs him over which finally actually kills him

S01E02 Killed in a play by a falling teepee, then a second time shot by Garrison which sends him in the air and he gets impaled on a flagpole on the way down

S01E03 Killed by a volcano rock that burns him then rolls on him but he’s alive again in the end but gets shot by Ned’s gun that he drops and it accidentally goes off

S01E04 Gets his arms and head torn off in an American football game

S01E05 Stan’s clone punches Kenny into a microwave where he gets cooked alive

S01E06 Death touches Kenny

S01E07 Kenny gets crushed by a Russian space station and turns into a zombie because he gets Worcestershire sauce in his veins, then Kyle chainsaws zombie Kenny in half, then zombie Kenny rises from his grave and is crushed by a statue and a plane

S01E08 Kenny is killed by a bunch of turkeys. His eye gets plucked out. It’s dark blue

S01E10 After Kenny gets turned into a duck-billed platypus, Jimbo and Ned shoot him

S01E11 Ms. Ellen throws a sword through Kenny’s face

S01E12 While Mecha Streisand and a giant robot Leonard Maltin fight, Kenny plays with a tetherball and gets the rope wrapped around his neck and it strangles him

S01E13 Kenny gets stuck on a go kart and it drags him around but stops and he’s still alive! Too bad the go kart stops on train tracks and a train runs him over. Stan’s grandpa sends a video of the event to America’s Stupidest Home Videos and wins $10,000

If you read all that, first of all hello. I’m not new to the fandom even though this is the first thing I’ve posted on this tumblr blog. I’ve been writing a fanfic called Caffetamine though so I’m not a complete non-entity. Anyway, I’ll watch season 2 soon and post my notes on that too probably.

[khaleesiofalicante]

I’m going to be honest. I was planning on reading this yesterday but I knew that if I started I would stay up until 3 a.m and I had school tomorrow 😂, but here I am:

“Rafael had all but screamed when Bapak had surprised him with the motorbike on his birthday '' It has only begun and I’m screaming!!!

“But Rafael had dressed up. He had even let Max paint his nails black.” I love Max and Rafael with my entire soul

“Max had a habit of ‘borrowing’ things and selling them on eBay.” I love that little shit and his mischievous 💙💙

Octavian was one of his closest friends. Okey but that friendship??? Love it

“Dude, college kids don’t give a shit,” Tavvy laughed. “You could walk into a lecture covered in runes, holding a seraph blade and they wouldn’t give you a second look.” “Cause they are chill?” “Yes. But mostly cause they are dead inside,” Tavvy chuckled. SJHDUEHISAM WHY IS THIS SO TRUE??

You should follow me on Instagram. My handle is simp_for_carstairs.” I’M LAUGHING SO FUCKING HARD 😂 😂 😂 “She is not wrong,” Lily nodded seriously. “I’m a Jem Carstairs fan first and a vampire second.” Me too bro

“I heard there is a dalliance between a shadowhunter and a warlock,” Lily went on anyway. WHAT THE FUCK??? I LITERALLY SCREAMED. AND I’M IN CLASS

“But people bothered anyway. People liked to bother about things that did not concern them.” I know this is of shadowhunters, but it really speaks of everyone

“Rafael was sure there was something more than friendship between them. But David was polite to a fault and Max was an oblivious little shit. So, obviously nothing had happened yet. Sometimes Rafe wanted to knock their heads together and ask them to just talk it out. But no, it wasn’t his place.” JSSUHDEWIMS. OK. if i continue to quote everything i won’t finish. Let's move forward

Me when i found who started the rumor: 🙃🔪 🔪

“What the hell? Come on, Rafael! Bros before…uh, girls.” I SHOULDN’T BE LAUGHING THIS HARD. MY DOG IS GIVING ME WEIRD LOOKS. A DOG!! Like...He makes fun of Max but he is also an oblivious little shit

“David and I added rosemary to this one,” Uncle Jace wiped his hands on his apron. “It has definitely improved the taste, hasn’t it?” I- I don’t know if this was on purpose but- I- Wow

“I am this close to kidnapping the twins from the academy and bringing them back home. I love Mr. Herondale to death but this is getting out of hand.” How can a line be so funny and beautiful at the same time?? 💙💙

“Empty nest syndrome,” Rafael chuckled. “I’m glad neither Max nor I had to leave home. My fathers are much worse.” He remembered his first sleepover at the institute. His parents had waited for “an excruciating hour” before crashing the institute and joining the sleepover themselves. HOLY SHIT THIS IS GIVING ME SO MUCH SEROTONIN THAT I’M ALREADY AFRAID OF THE ANGST

“David,” Rafael grinned. “Are you afraid of my father?” “What? No! He is just a regular person…who can throw me in the silent city any time he wants,” David rambled and then shook his head. “Where is Max?” He tried to sound nonchalant. But Rafael noted the way the other boy’s eyes fluttered every time he said Max’s name. Just the way a crooked smile appeared on his brother’s lips every time someone said David’s name. Idiots. YES THEY ARE😂😂

Ahhh yess. The angst is starting and it will break my soul. Guess I’ll keep reading.

WHAT. THE. FUCK??? HOLLY SHIT!!! I WAS EXPECTING ANGST BUT THIS??? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?? I LITERALLY STARED AT THE SCREEN CAUSE I THOUGHT I HAD GOTTEN IT WRONG!!! THE FUCK??? I JUST CAN'T PROCESS THIS.

“Do you people know Magnus could have destroyed the clave decades ago if he wanted to do that? EXACTLY. HE WOULD HAVE LET YOU DIE IF HE WANTED TO!!! I CAN’T.

“Of course you don’t see anything wrong with this,” Paige sneered. “It’s not like you have a problem with incest. SAY THAT ONE MORE TIME AND I WILL FIND A WAY TO GO THERE AND BREAK EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR BONES!

You talk about warlock corruption but where all of you when Valentine exploited Jace and Clary? Where was this moral obligation when Valentine lied to his children and played with their feelings as if they were nothing but toys to be controlled and manipulated? I’m sick of shadowhunters victim blaming children instead of holding people like Valentine accountable.” EXACTLY. WHERE WERE THEY?

Ok, ok, I’m not ok but I'll just keep reading. I’m slightly traumatized but ok.

For the next thirty minutes, Max paced around the room, threatening to portal all the shadowhunters to hell. Then he went on about a plan to attack the cohort and portal them all to hell too. He kept talking about portalling people to hell. I feel him on a personal level!!!

“Rafael knew he had the option of not listening to what they had to say. But here is the thing about people, they don’t get to you. You get to them. They simply say something and leave. They probably don’t even mean the things they say or lose sleep over it. But it wasn’t the same for you. You obsess over it. You stay awake at night and let it consume your dreams. And that was the worst part because all of it looks like a choice. All of it looks like your fault.” THIS!!!!

“He ran his hand through the boy’s blue curls. Max had his own battles to fight. But they had to fight together.”

NO. ANYTHING BUT MAGNUS CRYING BECAUSE THEN I CRY!!!

“Fuck everyone else,” dad growled. “They’ve hurt our family enough.” EXACTLY!!!

“He needed to survive this. So, he decided to go back to the place he had learned how to survive in the first place. He needed to go back home.” Okey, this was a lot and I need a moment and some therapy probably

“Camilla Alvarez.” Interesting

The texts are just *chef kiss*

“His father had done that. Alec Lightwood had helped Joaquin and his people create a new world in Buenos Aires.” I LOVE ALEC LIGHTWOOD

Okey, but all of that conversation with Rafe and Magnus was beautiful and now I’m crying

THE OUTFIT!!! MASTERPIECE

Blue banners when the lost return, the shadowhunter rhythm said. Rafael had returned home – and he was no longer lost. WOW. JUST WOW.

“I would like to propose that we include a provision on hate speech,” Rafael said. FUCK YEAH

Not to be dramatic, BUT HOLY FUCK!! All this Cohort moment really hits cause its what society is like

“This is unacceptable!” Paige Ashdown looked furious. “Lightwood, you can’t just keep bringing up new laws to protect your family.” “I wouldn’t have to if you didn’t keep attacking my family, Paige!” the Consul Voice boomed across the hall. “And I’m not doing this to protect my own. My family happens to be one of the many you’ve victimized with your vicious prejudice.” LOUDER SO EVERYONE CAN HEAR

“I’m the Inquisitor’s daughter,” she said. “Next time, think twice before you quote the law at me.” Hello? Yes, I would like to request a seat at the Anjali supremacy cause that girl is such a badass

She turned to the Council. The Inquisitor looked like he was going to cry from pride. Rafael’s dad looked half terrified but mostly impressed. Lily was blowing kisses at Anjali. The other downworld leaders looked quite pleased.“Over to you Consul,” Anjali gave him a salute as usual – and then she was gone. “THAT’S THE BEST SHIT I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!” Emma Carstairs yelled. “Goddamn, I wish Magnus was here to see this,” Uncle Jace grinned. “That was satisfying as hell.” “No worries, I recorded the whole thing!” Kit put up his hand.- THEY HAVE SUCH AN ENERGY

“He wasn't afraid. He still wanted to hold her. He realized he wanted to hold her even if it would set him on fire.” My heart, i just 💙💙💙

OKAYY. That was a lot of trauma, screaming, loving and hating. And it also came longer than expected but you can’t blame me!! I loved it soooo much, it was amazing as always

Now guess who has 10 assignments to deliver and hasn’t started them for spending all the time reading this?? YES, it's me, so I better get to work 💙💙

FIRST OF ALL WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE SO MANY ASSIGNMENTS AND TESTS I AM GOING TO SET THE EDUCATION SYSTEM ON FIRE AND BUILD IT AGAIN FROM THE ASHES DO NOT TEST ME!!!

Also I am glad you enjoyed this. It is a very heavy chapter. So, do feel time to rest and recover.

I'll see you soon bebe 💙

[jaeyunluvs]

you’re mine - aron piper

Requested by @fashphotolife : yeah just like a hot jealous aron bc like ugh that’s probably hot 🥵Not really a specific request but just like a hot jealous aron Piper imagine

A/N: AHH I LOVE JEALOUS IMAGINES!!!!! Thank you so much for requesting! I saw many people doing the jealous interview thing, like buzzfeed interviews and stuff, it’s gonna be similar to that !

disclaimer: i don’t know any of these people personally, i made some characters up! english is my second language so please let me know if i have mistakes! :) also poor spanish, i’m sorry profesor

note: im sorry i used starbucks, pls don’t sue me that’s the only international coffee brand i can remember!  it’s unedited :))

word count: 1,5K

warnings: none but hot jealous aron is on his way ;) oh and crappy writing :’)

gif creds to @piperaron​ - <3

“Y/N! Come on! We’re getting late!” Your boyfriend Aron warned you at the phone. He was downstairs, waiting for you. You were getting prepared for the live interview with the Elite cast, including you. 

“Okay, okay!” you said on the phone and closed. You wore a white elegant dress and kinda revealing but you didn’t mind cause you looked amazing. When you ran downstairs you saw a curly head in a car, looking in your direction.

“Wo-w, hola carina” He stared at you, breathless. 

“hi babe!” You get in the car and kissed him on the lips. He still stared at you so you decided to speak up.

“earth to Aron! you there?” you stared at his brown eyes filled with love. He blushed and looked away kinda embarrassed.

“Lo siento amor you’re just to beautiful!” Now it was your turn to blush. He giggled, placed a kiss your lips and started the engine.

You wanted to stop and get coffee on your way. Aron wanted to come to get coffee with you. It was your local starbucks shop.

“Do you remember our first date was here?” Aron asked. You glanced and felt the nostalgia. 

“You were super nervous I can’t believe how you changed so much.” You answered smiling. He managed to laugh.

“Maybe you’re the reason why I’m changed” He stared at you. You giggled at his cheesiness.

“Hi can I get your order?” You and Aron were interrupted by a good looking employee asking for your order.

“Hi, can I get a Latte Macchiato please?” you asked.

“What’s your name?” He asked, looked like smiling.

“Y/N” you said not caring enough.

“I like your name just a pretty name for a pretty lady” he said not caring about the guy next to him. 

You were taken aback by the compliment with saying a simple thank you without emotion but before you could say anything more, Aron pushed you to his side, can’t tell that you guys are dating because you weren’t public.

“Careful big guy, she has a boyfriend and I’ll kick anyone’s ass if I see someone flirting with her.” He was raising his voice. You hold him down.

“Aron, Aron stop, stop, chill” you looked at him you knew he gets calmer when he looks you in the eyes. When he calmed down, you ordered for him. The poor barista was watching you guys on shock and fear. 

You paid and mouthed a sorry for his actions. He didn’t say anything just a weak smile. You hated when there’s a fight. 

Then you got your orders and when you were leaving Aron shouted. “My eyes on you” to the poor barista and he got so guilty in front of his customers.

You punched him in the arm. “Aron what the fuck? He was a poor boy, and we’re not public you know this is so normal.” You stated. Aron didn’t look at you just walked into the car.

“He can’t just flirt with a random girl especially you!” You held him by his wrist. 

“You know you’re the only guy for me right?” You looked at him with a serious expression. He managed to have a weak smile then continued to ride.

When you were on the interview set, Ester and Danna ran to you. 

“Hola bebe, we should get prepared. Hola Aron, go to the boys room.” Danna said. You waved your hand as a signal of saying “bye” and he did the same. The cast didn’t know you guys were a thing either.

You met the other female cast mates and had your make up artist prepare you. After preparing all the cast got into a room and sat around. You and Aron sat next to each other obviously. 

“Hello ColaStation watchers, I’m Amell Wilson and today, I’m here with the elite cast! we’re going to read fan messages and play “Who’s most likely to?”. Here we go!” He said cheerfully. 

Everyone introduced themselves and the interview started with “Who’s Most Likely To?” 

“Who’s most likely to be single?” Everyone pointed you and Aron. You both laughed. Amell, the interviewer smiled too.

“Who’s most likely to be rule a fashion company?” Most of the cast pointed you and you blushed. “You have a great taste in fashion, carina” Omar said, you thanked him by blowing him a kiss. One of a sudden, interviewer Amell commented “You do have a great taste in fashion Y/N you look beautiful.” He said. 

Aron was startled by this comment and you noticed this but ignored it because everyone was here.

You played the game for awhile, laughed, had fun together. By the interview continued you could see Amell watching you. Aron noticed and cleched his fists but couldn’t do anything.

You eventually had a break after the first game. The cast divided, but most of them went to outside to smoke, including Aron. You and Danna, went to restroom and the preparation room before going back to Aron’s. While you were waiting for Danna outside, you saw Amell approaching you. Oh no you thought yourself.

“Hi Y/N”

“Hello?”

“Umm so I-” Amell was interrupted by Danna. Thankfully because you were getting kinda uncomfortable and you hated making Aron like this

“¿Qué es lo que pasa aquí?” Danna came and tied her arm into yours started walking. 

“No lo se, he came and talk to me.” You made sure. Your look on your face was explaining and Danna trusted you so she didn’t make a scene.

Meanwhile in the smoking session, the boys were talking about how Amell looking at you.

“No lo se porque pero, Amell can’t stop staring at her.” Miguel claimed.

“Yeah it is getting kinda weird” Alvaro started a little laughter. Aron wasn’t paying attention, jealousy was burning inside of him.

“Imagine Y/N, one of the most beautiful girl in the world not being single. I can hear the people crying.” Omar said. Aron just smiled and smirked.

“Like Y/N would date him.” Aron said sarcastically. Everyone looked at Aron and noticed how angry he was. They knew something was behind this.

After thirty minutes, the cast turned back to do the last activity, anonymous fan comments on the actors.

It started with Ester. 

“ ’Ester Exposito is literally queen she’s my idol.’ Awhh thank you.” She blew some kisses to the camera.

“’ Alvaro is so underrated, he is a great actor. Keep up! Love you!’ Thank you so much I love you too!” Alvaro smiled.

“ ‘Aron Piper is that lucky guy to make out Omar. Don’t you think? I’m jealous.’” Omar just laughed and mouthed a thank you.

“’ Aron is literally every girls’ celebrity crush at this point. Thank you Elite creators.’” Aron just smiled and thanked at the comment. When they handed the box over you, Amell continued to stare at you.

“’Y/N is that girl that I would literally die for, I’m so happy she’s single can you marry me?’“ 

“Hahaha he’s kinda right!” Amell laughed and added. And this was the end of Aron’s patience. He couldn’t help but said,

“Too bad she has a boyfriend” He laughed grasping your hand quickly.

Everyone in shock, can’t say anything.

“I KNEW IT!” Itzan shouted

“ALVARO GIVE ME MY 50 EUROS” Jorge said laughing.

You looked at them in shock not knowing what’s going on. Alvaro groaned and gave him the 50 euro bill.

“We get into a bet, I knew you guys we’re dating” Jorge showing you the bill.

“Honestly, it couldn’t have been more obvious but I’m still mad you didn’t tell me” Danna said pouting.

“You guys are so cute together.” Mina said. You were so happy with all the comments you were receiving by the cast. Their blessings were really important. 

“Now, that it’s public, take your eyes off of my girlfriend.” Aron growled at Amell. You can see he was getting scared. They stopped the live and some advertisements to calm down Aron.

“Okay Aron, I think we should end this live and go.” You said holding him. He looked at you, he couldn’t stand your eyes.

After a break, everyone turned back to the interview, but it was super awkward. Amell couldn’t look at any of you.

“Thank you for the dearest elite cast, and thank you for watching. Don’t forget to like and subscribe for more of this content!” Amell said and the turned the camera to the cast to say goodbye.

Aron waved and immediately kissed you on the lips. Everyone was cheering. When you ended the kiss and live, your phone blew up from all of your friends and family.

Sister: ARE YOU DATING ARON? HOW?

Best friend: It’s funny how I know it and everyone’s getting crazy hehe

Brother: I’M GOING TO KICK HIS ASS 

You laughed at all the messages you’ve been receiving, especially your best friend’s. 

After the interview, Danna hold you and forced you to explain everything and all the details about you and Aron. 

“SPILL THE TEA!” Danna shouted.

“Umm so we started dating 3-4 months ago...” You continued to explain while watching everyone’s jaw dropped. For a little while later, Aron came smirking to you.

“Hey ladies, mind if I steal mi novia, for a minute?” 

“No Aron, ella es nuestras amiga.” fought Claudia laughing.

You smiled at girls “I’ll be back in 5″ and they continued to talk.

Aron held you close, holding your hand, pulling you to his side. 

“You’re mine. And no one can ever take you away from me.” He said whispering to your ear with a serious tone. “Especially a guy like A- what Ameelllo?” He said making you laugh with a funny tone this time

“Congrats Aron, you ruined the moment. I said it once, I’ll say it forever, don’t worry bebe, another guy like ‘Ameeellooo’ could never make me crazy like you do. ” 

[juicemitio]

Alright I went to Louisville Galaxycon and saw Travis and Clint twice, for their worldbuilding workshop and their Q&A. Here's some interesting stuff I learned (I didn't include stuff they talked about that's pretty common knowledge or they talked about on the last ttazz)

Graduation 

Fitzroy was originally going to be a jock that was weak bc he no longer had a team, Travis told Griffin that that didn't really work for the world so they reframed it as him training to be a hero, was great academically and behaviorally, but had a problem no one had seen before and no one felt like dealing with. It specifically wasn't "barbarian fails bc he can't keep his rage in check," it was that no one was willing to deal with his magic so they shipped him off

Someone asked Travis to explain fitzroy's magic, so from the DM's mouth- he's a barbarian subtype with elemental magic which has a random effect while raging, which we haven't seen yet (path of the wild soul if you want to look it up and see what he can do) and he took a feat which gives him the ability to cast 3 cantrips of his choosing. What I thought was interesting was that Travis described Fitz's magic using the word "elemental" twice, even though that isn't specifically stated in the path of the wild soul entry

Travis knows Argo's secret and is very excited about it 

Clint has a pirate fiction book he reads every night before they record to get into the headspace to play Argo, he told us the name but I forgot it 

There is one small little concept that made the whole of graduation make sense to Travis and is what the arc will be about, and he only figured it out a few days before recording. Obviously he didn't tell us what it was

Originally it was going to start with everyone starting at age 11 and slowly killing the other kids off, but Justin didn't feel comfortable playing a game surrounded by kids dying 

The accounting scene is already one of Travis' all time favorite taz scenes

The pegasus scene informed Travis on exactly how he was going to treat the firbolg

Also Travis referred to Justin's character exclusively as "the firbolg," which means "master firbolg" is solely a thing going on with the npcs in the game which I find hilarious. They just all decided to give him a dope title bc he deserves it, meanwhile no one will call Fitzroy "sir"

To Fitzroy, social threats are an extremely real and serious thing, like the Biggest thing to him (we were talking about what characters found threatening in the workshop, for context)  

There's some big concept/idea that comes up in the next episode that travis almost let spill and had to quickly stop himself from saying it

Someone mentioned eating breakfast in their question in the workshop and Travis goofed on it for a second, then said "cereal world" suddenly, and Clint had to pick up the question bc Travis had to take a second to make a note of it in his phone 

Travis started brainstorming graduation in March and they recorded the first episode in October, and his main job in that time was working on graduation 

Before Buckminster was adapted for graduation he could not fight at all, if he got into a fight he would die, he poured everything into charisma and could talk his way out of any fight (even the big bad of the game he crit 20d his check and the big bad walked away from the fight) 

Travis is really into psychology and how if you assign a label to someone they're going to act more like it (ie you tell a kid they're amazing and smart and talented and they become more like that, you tell a kid they're annoying and dumb and a problem they become more like that), and how that was a major contributor to play into hero/villain/sidekick/henchperson dynamics, you get assigned this arbitrary title of good/evil/subservient and you become like that to fit the role, and then the inevitable pushing against that mold

Travis is fully aware of his story being compared to harry potter and he doesn't care bc it's apt (people in a school arbitrarily divided into four groups and one of them is the Bad One), also he knows people describe it as "sky high meets Harry Potter meets my hero academia" and he actually finds that really flattering bc he thinks that sounds cool and like something he'd want to watch 

On that note, Travis is a self-identified Slytherin and he's always upheld that the reason Slytherin is depicted in a bad light is bc Rowling decided she didn't like them, and he's always sympathized with the idea of a first year Slytherin working their ass off following the rules and doing their work and getting points, and Dumbledore rewards three idiots for breaking like every rule and pulls the trophy away from you. This was a big inspiration for graduation, of one group getting a bad rep and being portrayed as evil for literally no reason 

Amnesty

Clint & Travis's favorite scene they've ever done together was Ned & Aubrey's final scene together 

Aubrey and Dani do move in with each other at the end of amnesty

Balance

Travis' main emotion around taz is pride and he's most proud of the scene in stolen century with the spirits in the robots, bc they had to record it a second time bc it got way too dark and ended in a really grim way and about 20 min after they finished they all decided that they weren't happy with it, that it didn't fit the tone, he's really proud they didn't just leave it be and they took the second pass at it to make it right

I'm pretty sure he's talked about wanting to kill Magnus off at the beginning before but he mentioned that it was only at the end of petals to the metal he actually realized he wanted Magnus to live, bc Hurley had to sacrifice herself to save Magnus bc Magnus had been so reckless, that hit Travis really hard. Travis realized that Magnus' recklessness was getting people hurt and so Magnus did too, so Magnus become a bit more cautious and took up rogue training to try not to get anyone killed again 

Dust

Dust wasn't designed to be anything more than a one off and the workload was completely unsustainable, the document of notes for dust was about 100 pages and only about 10% of it got used

The reason Travis loved it so much was bc it was a mystery and he found it really fun

Commitment

Clint would love to revisit commitment, but probably not in podcast form bc he didn't find himself really being in the moment as much bc of all the different things he had to keep track of, he'd like to see a comic adaptation/continuation if possible

It was based of a comic he wrote that never got published bc the company producing it failed (he still cashed his paycheck) so he reused it bc he still liked it a lot, it was about how America was founded as a monarchy instead of a democracy and what that changed in the usa's (united sovereignty of america's) history, and how people now were fighting to establish a democracy. Also there were cowboys and spaceships and other cool stuff he put in there bc he liked it

General adventure zone

The reason why they're are able to do romantic relationships w/o being weirded out by it (they joke about it but they don't actually care) is bc it's never done in an explicit or sexual way and since it's the decision the characters would make to pursue the relationship then that's the decision they make. He reframed it as it wouldn't be weird if a family were writing a script together and there was a romance and one person wrote lines for one character and the other wrote lines for the other. He did mention that two siblings playing characters in a relationship as actors on screen wouldn't be cool though

They sometimes get comments that some of the stuff they do is "fanservice," but they feel that they owe their success to their fans and they owe some to them 

They are both aware of and proud that Justin is the best at character creation, Clint specifically really was talking about how Justin's strong suit is definitely character creation and characterization

General mcelroy stuff

They walked pretty close to me when they entered the stage room for the q&a and like… they're short, like shorter than you think

Travis referred to his unborn child as "baby dod" (I'm not 100% certain but I'm pretty sure) which I looked up and is a nickname for George, and given with their older kid being named Barbera and nicknamed BeBe and Travis talking before about how he and his wife like classic names with cool nicknames it makes sense

Travis had an earing in his right ear, I didn't get to see his left ear and I couldn't tell if it was an actual piercing or a fake, it looked really good though. Also his tinted glasses look a lot cooler irl than they do in pictures

Clint told the teenage mutant Ninja turtle story with the signatures that griffin told on mbmbam, but Clint remembered it as happening at King's Island, not Disney. This story was prompted by the question of the biggest lie he ever told his kids, and he only came clean about this a few months ago

Travis told a story about how he finished a videogame when he was younger and was so excited that he picked up a plastic knife, yelled "throwing knife!" threw it directly at Griffin who dodged it and it hit and shattered a window

[shtbgs-blog]

hello it’s me tea being a bad admin and not writing the first event. Instead i’m doing this and i’d make a pretty graphic but i hate my big computer right now so a nice graphic might come later bye, this also got insanely long and if you guys actually read it k u d o s

INTRODUCING…. me.

HELLO DREAMS N QUEENS, I feel like I haven’t said that in a while but anyway I’m tea, i’m 23, my pronouns are she/her, and I already forgot what else I’m suppose to write here like i’m in the est timezone but i act like i’m in the pst for some reason????? also I do not personally have any triggers and I have no limits on what i rp like I’m always down for literally any plot even if it’s been done to death it hasn’t been done by my character so lets go.

INTRODUCING…. the muses.

ugh are you ready for the shit show..... im gonna shoot myself in the face i have so many

DON O’CALLAHAN, justin chatwin, ( 30 ) + ALONE by HALSEY feat. BIG SEAN & STEFFLON DON.

IMOGEN WARD, madelaine petsch, ( 22 ) + REPERCUSSIONS by BEA MILLER.

JAMES WILLIAMS, milo ventimiglia, ( 35 ) + iROBOT by JON BELLION.

MILO SHEPARD, nick jonas, ( 24 ) + ALL THE KIDS ARE DEPRESSED by JEREMY ZUCKER.

OPHELIA MONROE, billie lourd, ( 25 ) + THUNDER by IMAGINE DRAGONS.

SHANE FRANCIS, carlson young, ( 22 ) + BETTER DAYS by HEDLEY.

WESLEY LLOYD, aaron taylor johnson, ( 25 ) + I’M NOT FAMOUS by AJR.

NIRVANA BAILEY, meaghan rath, ( 32 ) + TROUBLE by HALSEY.

ETHAN MCDONALD, dylan o’brien, ( 24 ) + I FALL APART by POST MALONE ( cover ).

VANCE MICHAELS, cody christian, ( 20 ) + I MEAN IT by G-EAZY.

BRUCE DENIRO, boyd holbrook, ( 35 ) + SUCKER FOR PAIN by LIL WAYNE, WIZ KHALIFA & IMAGINE DRAGONS W/ TY DOLLA $IGN FT X AMBASSADORS.

COOPER JORDAN, charlie puth, ( 24 ) + ME MYSELF & I by G-EAZY FEAT. BEBE REXHA

MICKEY DONOVAN, tony oller, ( 24 ) + SOBER UP by AJR.

JESSICA MILANO, mila kunis, ( 35 ) + SO WHAT by P!NK.

TANSY MALAI, brenda song, ( 30 ) + DON'T THREATEN ME WITH A GOOD TIME by PANIC! AT THE DISCO.

INTRODUCING…. wanted plots.

Okay I am obsessed with platonic / supporting friends ships like? oh my fucking god? give me a good gang and I will legit die? especially if it’s like a brot3 or something like three solid amazing friends and like the more people connected the better im OBSESSED with name dropping. 

Also I’m a bitch for cheating / toxic relationships. Give me physical fights and sleeping with other people. Give Me Fucking Angst. Let my muse be the cheater or let my muse be the one cheated on listen I’m down for legit all of it but when I do the specific muse posts I’ll sort of narrow this down a lot more but these are my two favorite kinds of ships which can technically go below but fight me.

INTRODUCING…. the favorites.

I will say this until I’m blue in the face, I am disgustingly straight for ( 4 ) men in this world. Okay there are a lot more than just four but I do have a top four because I’m a basic bitch but I love ansel elgort, taron egerton, danny jones & hugh grant. those are my main boys but if I made a legit list it’d probably go on for years. honorable mention who is my solid #5 is definitely keith powers. I am OBSESSED with this mans.

Want to talk about how gay I am? WOULD LOVE TO. I am a complete ( slut ) for vanessa morgan, kehlani, zendaya, zoe kravitz, ashley tisdae, lucy hale, lynn gunn, hayley kiyoko, nicole byer, bae suzy, keke palmer and ulrikke falch bitch MURDER ME.

as for ships like i’m down for anything m/f m/m f/f like I do lean mostly towards m/f and i do often prefer playing the male which is another favorite of mine like this rpg is the most i’ve ever played females and it’s legit so fucking weird to me??? i get so nervous talking about ships and stuff when it comes to my females because it’s so far out of my domain / comfort zone so murder me violently.

I tend to lean more toward platonic / supportive / family ships tho because I feel like I’m not stepping on anyones toES LMFAO OKAY I SHOULD STOP RAMBLING NOW BECAUSE IM EXTRA AS HELL

but also my favorite sweatshirt is the one i’m wearing and it says ‘i’m like 104% tired’ and my favorite pants are black boho pants with white swirls and just big and comfy ok

INTRODUCING…. future plans.

I AM HERE TO BREAK THE FUCK OUT OF MY COMFORTZONE I HATE IT IN HERE LIKE I am so used to playing dom!male characters and like don’t get me wrong, i fucking love my boys, i love them so god damn much but I want to have some girls who get love too like I want to play sub!boys and soft!girls and hard!girls and GIRLS! IN! GENERAL! like i sound so fucking basic but when I tell you guys it’s been about 10 years since I actually dedicated time to fleshing out a female character I mean it’s been about 11.

Also I really want to play out some slowburn relationships, some active marriages, some really fucked up exes and really confusing best friends like those are my favorites but I always get so fucking busy or so spacey that I wind up going missing for long periods of time and like? I’m here to stay? Like I feel comfy as fuck in this rpg and I am here to actively get past one or two threads for my connections / ships I’m here for longlasting relationships / rping okay????

AS FOR THE FUTURE, I do have two muses who are sitting in the submit waiting to be accepted? Like which is wild because while they’ve been sat there I’ve accepted myself twice? I don’t know why I’m holding off I guess I just feel guilty bringing in two girls without any sort of connection or anything???? Like I can not wait to bring Lennon up in here because my lil blue haired queen is going to burn this motherfucker down :’)

INTRODUCING…. why i said fuck it.

I SAID FUCK IT because do we wanna be honest? I had been running a rpg that was just draining the life out of me I felt like I was being a bad admin and not doing enough and I just wanted a group where I didn’t have to do so much y’know like, I wanted to just rp in a place where I could do whatever in the living fuck I wanted?? Like I wanted 50 muses, I want to sometimes just make graphics, I want to sometimes just chitchat ooc in private messages or just lurk the dash or just write starters / reply to them like

some days i’m here as fuck for writing and sometimes i’m not and I felt like no matter what rpg I ran or joined I’d be like put on a specific schedule and people will leave me in the dust???? you know????? but I feel like here we’re all just sort of chillin and tryin to live our best lives and I feel like this is my own personal and selfish safe haven like

i’m selfish as fuck and lazy as fuck and here as fuck for all of you :’)

[jewel-s-blog]

about me + bias list

 hi there, I’m jewel :)

she/her/hers ・ 20 ・ kpop (writing) blog

Yes, Jewel is my real name although my parents admit I was supposed to be named elizabeth but changed their minds last minute after I was born how cute and I’m currently in university. I study political science and japanese for those wondering (because yes, I am japanese and it’s helpful when you live in hawaii to have that degree yk?). If any of this stuff is even mildly interesting and you have any curiosities, pls feel free to ask me!

I try to write some things when I can, so feel free to take a look at my masterlist. I also read A LOT of fics on this site, so also peep my recs if you feel like it. Warning: its mostly fluff and angst and almost always includes smut but there’s some really good stuff worth reading still! 

Feel free to talk to me :) i don’t have any kpop friends irl :( all my friends are locals smh 

I try my hardest to be active as much as possible but it’s taken me over a year to finally get used to tumblr lol marklee and i both struggle with complex technology i guess Of course, there are times when I get busy with college and will probably seem to drop off the face of the planet exam season kills but now that I’ve been in quarantine for a month, I figured now is the best time to start building an active tumblr routine. 

That’s all for now! Keep reading below for my bias list :)

xoxo, jewel <3

Bias List 

Before I begin, I will warn that this is basically a giant NCT shxtpost. With LOTS of hyperlinks for educational purposes and absolute crackhead-ery. I’ll eventually make a separate list for other groups I stan, but this blog is mainly NCT and this is already so long so I’ll leave it as this. Enjoy!

Biases are bolded in the beginning of each unit, so you can skip everything after if you don’t wanna see my ramblings following it.

A/N: After biasing nearly every member in NCT/WayV I’ve settled for now on my biases for each unit. This will most likely rotate fairly regularly as I literally fall in love with a different member every day cited here. solo stan? I don’t know her.

ULT

Jaehyun  *ahem excuse me i mean* 

Johnny Suh, it’s official. Don’t know how to explain, but I love everything about him. In the end, it’s always him. damn i sound like y/n thoughts but istg it’s true From SM Rookies to NCT Life to MV behinds, he’s the one. But I’ve also come to realize that I find myself most relatable to him as a person and I think that’s why no one else can trump him wow narcissist much jewel It’s kind of just my gut feeling. It also helps that hes the fluffiest tall, muscular tight booty hottie on the planet. See this black on black dance practice for further scientific explanation even in this jaehyun trying to wreck me so badddddd

Not gonna lie, I HAD IT BAD FOR MARK LEE still do and yet Johnny overcame that. If mark lee were my first love, johnny is my soulmate.

UPDATE! 

Lee Jeno has officially been added to the ult list. *See the entirety of my april activity on my sns accounts if you would like to see how this happened haha :)

NCT U  

im in love with him bc he literally reminds me of my boyfriend -- i like chill guys ok

Taeil is my little teddy bear who looks great in red hair and has a voice form heaven. Evidence? Here you go. He didn’t stand out to me much in the beginning because I was either deaf or blind but after Chain, the game was OVER. +moon taeil in shorts?? serve them thighs honey. Love you bebe tomato <3

BUT Doyoung is the #1 bias wrecker here because have you seen his cover of beautiful on masked singer?? have you?? if not, let me educate you. Also his collab with Sejeong?? Literally the cutest MV ever, perfect for Christmas, listened to it every year since it’s release.

Listen to Coming Home - NCT U for further scientific evidence that NCT has top vocals in the kpop industry.

NCT 127

THE Jung Jaehyun. For reasons that need no explanation. but ill give it anyway smh

After watching the performance of herin and jaehyun singing a whole new world I knew that was it for me. (I still watch it once a month for my jaehyun-related health and to honor SM’s biggest loss, seo herin and ji hansol but thats for another conversation) back to jaehyun His vocals are unique in NCT and bring a nice color to their songs, the man looks good in literally anything, and I’ll probably say this about every member, but I love his dance style--body rolls for days sis. Definitely my ideal type, which my boyfriend is 100% aware of; no secrets in my relationship ofc which explains the wreckage. Pretty sure 81% of the fandom gets wrecked by him daily, so I think I’ll stop here. 

NCT Dream 

Renjun.  why? i just think he’s neat but no really, it was this performance (ok actually this got me ALL SORTS OF WRECKED) and this fancam that had me falling in love with him but were gonna ignore the fact that I get bias wrecked DAILY by all the other members  GOd-tier vocals, personality for daysssssss, variety KING HUANG RENJUN. Safe to claim that I go into renjun feels about 3x a week. Check my twitter for proof. +dnyl renjun was a blessing and I sometimes cant believe that it actually happened. How do I explain?? He’s literally the best boy, but when he gets all worked up....let’s stop there before I have to go to confession again.

But for fun, lets list why I have biased every dream member at some point shall we? (in no particular order) Dream might just be my ult group, songs always bop, members at star quality 

mark- yes i am including mark bc he was the reason i even started stanning dream dreamies leader since mmc days, mentor, A1 rap skills, ad libs go crazy, unparalleled dancing style, hardest worker, cutest watermelon advocate ever, all around amazing person can you tell he used to be my ult? + he’s a good christian boy and my catholic *ss has to confess my sins for being a simp for him 24/7

chenle- vocal GOD, most steady live vocals in kpop, laugh to die for

jeno- i cannot resist his eye smile i wanna cuddle and onstage charisma-2:54 “let’s goooooo” and i alskfdfjlkdldkfa. 

jaemin- “other than my members, i don’t have any friends” and yet he’s literally the most caring and wonderful little puff in existence fight me pls dont im a pacifist 

heachan- idk why but donghyukie feels like he could be my best friend and also cant stop staring at him in their dance practices his body proportions are unreal and his vocal ad libs?? don’t even get me STARTED on heachans vocals

jisung- he is my son, but also my son’s vocals?? MWAH that voice got me second guessing if he’s really my son 

WayV 

Ten Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul another member where it kinda just....happened? In the end I was like “damn, when did you sneaky bugger get in my heart?” He’s got a similar vibe as Johnny AND DO NOT COME FOR MY THROAT FOR SAYING THAT THATS MY OPINION Like Johnny, I see myself in Ten. There are so many reasons why I love Ten, so I’ll make it simple and provide them to you. 

Reason 1 - Performance/dance  he just hit different, he’s THAT good. Reason 2 - vocals the amount his vocals has improved?? UNMATCHED. Reason 3 - INTELLECTUAL (still trying to find the clip of him talking about different kinds of love) Reason 4 - multi-lingual KING ok so this vid is him struggling in mandarin, but imagine, you speak thai and english and learn korean to debut and all of a sudden your agency says “ok learn chinese now.” MANDARIN IS ONE OF THE HARDEST LANGUAGES TO LEARN. Reason 5 - bad b*tch he just radiates bad bitxh energy in everything he does, and I appreciate a bad bitxh

BUT I love wayv’s chaotic energy and chemistry so much that I literally love them all dreamies watch out 

+special shoutout to xiaojuns vocals in Love Talk

+kun being a dimpled zaddy (jaehyun&kun type CONFIRMED)

+lucas holding binoculars like THAT @ 1:10

+yangx2 doing THIS (prepare to be blown away)

+hendery being a the best teacher 

+winwin BEING WINWIN THE DANCE GOD 

+winwin AGAIN and with Ten here i don’t even think i have to say that i tweeted about this everyday for a month and im still not over it. This specific dance really allowed winwin to shine even though ten is my bias. It really allowed others to see the fruit of his classical training even in modern dance which he never trained in. Not gonna be repetitive and SCREAM  say that he’s underrated, because we all know that already. Just show winwin some love, ok? thank you.

And so finally, we’ve reached the end. Phew, this took me almost 5 hours to put together because I definitely got carried away. For those who made it all the way to the end, thank you, I love you. It’s so messy and I don’t have the mental capacity to do anymore editing but I hope you got something from this massive post <3 Feel free to let me know what you think! xoxo, jewel

[whale-shark-queen]

You mentioned fucked up weird AUs in your one post? I'm interested. Tell me about your favourite one(s)!!

AAAaaaah thank you so much!!

Uhhhhhhh heck most of them involve N turning into some horrible Thing because he’s the Estranged Outsider with a Connection to the Bad Guys Even If It’s Not Willingly (yknow like how Eren from snk is a titan shifter or Rin from blue exorcist is part demon) and all of them involve vuvuzelashipping (Nxall the Nuvema lot) I don’t really have a single favourite but I’ll summarize the ones I like most (also note that some of them are good dad Ghetsis/Dadsis aus because u gotta balance out the angst somehow plus dadsis aus are Cool)

Under the cut because I literally can’t summarise for shit and I’m sure no one wants to scroll past 3 pages worth of this (mobile users I apologise since the app is SHIT and refuses to even acknowledge these) 

Also here’s a bit of an index so u can skip to ones that sound interesting instead of going through them all but first u should ask nationalharmonica about her aus bc I love all of hers and they’re awesome and need more love and she also helped with alot of these aus too!! ESPECIALLY the Dragonflower au which I won’t include here because I think she has it on her blog somewhere already.  If ur wondering why I haven’t posted any of these it’s because a) i have neither the skill, time or patience to draw up proper references for all of the characters involved and b) I’m always worried theyll seem too Out There for some people but here we go au masterpost i guess, if anyone reading would like more info feel free to ask!!!

Bacterial Contamination inspired au aka bacterial pestileNce

BotW au

Ib au

PMMM au (the longest one)

Plasma/Aether swapover, N wins+UB monochromeshipping au

Simple fNaf dadsis au

sister locatioN dicksis au (yes I have two for that because I only found out about the secret springtrap cutscene at the end of SL that changes everything the other day)

Nombie (dadsis) au

isolatioN au- Au based on the song Bacterial Contamination.  N goes to the snobbiest most pretentious school you can imagine only because his ex mafia boss dad wants the best for him.  N hides the fact he’s being relentlessly bullied until a teacher phones Ghetsis up asking why N is in such a state whenever he comes into school (BC bruises and cuts and looking roughed up in general).  N goes to therapy and gets meds but surprise they’re an experimental drug and he’s a bug boy now

- BotW au where Touya is Link, Cheren as Revali, Bianca is Mipha and Touko is Zelda.  Ghetsis (who is kinda like Demise if he hung around to make sure his curse worked) is the king of a neighboring region who’s a bit of a warmongering asshole but his son N is friends with princess Touko and her…ahem, associates, which is the only reason Touko’s dad stays civil with him at all.  He uses this to his advantage and infects N with the Malice and reveals his plan to take over Unova, knowing fine well that N would run away to Touko for help.  The truth is he’d set up N to be a ticking time bomb and eventually he becomes the Calamity.  After the whole ~100 year coma and releasing the divine beasts~ thing Touya only remembers who N is after killing him but dw there’s a blood moon just as Touko is sealing the Malice away and N’s freed spirit is brought back to become a friendly giant fluffy spider boy just because I said so

- Ib au with N as Mary (obv Ghetsis is Guertena) except instead of going crazy and trying to kill everyone and being burned up and dying himself the toutous make him sit in the frame while they drag it out of the portal to the real world: problem solved.  I have all this stuff about the others being able to step into his frame but he can’t leave unless someone else draws him so he can possess the drawing but I won’t go into it here BC this post is gonna be long enough already

-Okay I have two madoka aus because possibilities for N are Ndless but I’ve only really developed the dicksis version whereas I only have a witch design for a possible dadsis version so here’s the dicksis one.  The first: Ghetsis is kinda like Walpurgisnacht and N was originally a familiar that represented Ghetsis’ interest being only in things that directly oppose him who was becoming powerful enough to become a witch of his own.  Not wanting him to have even a fraction of power himself Ghetsis transformed him into a human shape, gave him sentience and intelligence and as close to a pure heart as possible so he would be easier to manipulate and led him to believe that magical girls/boys hunt down innocent witches for fun and have witches trapped in their soul gems and tasks N with stealing people’s soul gems to ‘free the witch inside’.  The problem is that the alteration gave N the mindset of ‘innocents who aren’t involved must be protected at all costs’ rather than Ghetsis’ mindset of ‘don’t give a fuck about anyone unless they’re a problem’.  N is also sent to integrate into human society so that he can find magical peepos easier so he ends up coincidentally going to school with the Nuvema kiddos.  He ends up becoming friends with them until he finds out Cheren and Bianca are magicas (I’m just gonna call them that for simplicity) but even though the toutous arent magicas they still support them which is all very upsetting and conflicting for N but he tries his best to protect the witches and steal more soul gems until the others eventually call him out on it and prove to him that the shit Ghetsis told him is bull.  When he goes to confront him about it it’s too late, Ghetsis has absorbed enough witches to become a Walpurgisnacht-like entity, and finally allows N to become a witch.  I’ll link the drawings I’ve done of him but basically his labyrinth would be like a puppet theater and even tho hes the witch he’d have this fuckin giant messed up ghetsis-lookin puppet master familiar who pulls at his strings and coordinates his attacks.  There’d be an audience of masked figures that look like all the magicas he’s caused the deaths of, tiny animals with scissors to represent his wish for freedom and also his fear of his ‘father’ since they never actually get to cut the strings holding him up, and figures that look a heck of a lot like the nuvema kiddos watching in a balcony.  This is all tied into a theory I came up with that almost all the witches are able to be saved since yknow how Homura had that figure of Madoka locked away and Madoka was able to bring her back, and how Sayaka had the violin guy and Charlotte had that doll that probably represents her dead mother? My guess is that if the people those figures represent are brought to the witch and reach out to them the magical girl inside would be able to be freed.  But yeah since N was never really a human the Nuvema kiddos can only really save a fraction of his conscious and he ends up like Bebe.  They all beat the shit out of Ghetsis and everyone lives happily ever after with their pocket witch bf

- the au where 1) plasma and aether are sort of swapped around and 2) N beats the toutous in the final battle.  This is actually based on nationalharmonica’s courtesaN au which is awesome BTW (but it doesn’t involve actual courtesans or N being a courtesan at all but its Sarah’s au so if you’re interested you should totally ask her about it).  Ghetsis keeps Touko and Touya prisoner and just to rub it in their faces blackmails Cheren and Bianca into joining and doing sciency experiment shit which ends up with Touko and Touya becoming UB fusions/hybrids themselves; Touya with Kartana and Touko with Celesteela.  Ofc in the later stages they are able to destroy their place of confinement and escape with Cheren and Bianca to find N who becomes understandably fucked off and upset that his friends have been put through all this shit but begs them not  to kill Ghetsis so he can ask what’s going on.  When he does Ghetsis stabs him with a syringe full of UB fusion shit because he knows fine well hes gonna die he just wanted a final ‘fuck you’ before he is killed by both fire and paper cuts.  Surprise! It’s a Guzzlord.  N becomes a big squishy boy. I’ve done drawings of N in human Guzzlord fusion/hybrid form but I’ve been afraid of posting it but uh if anyones interested i will

- Simplified fNaf dadsis au - basically N and the Nuvema kiddos are the ones that were killed and stuffed in the animatronics, Ghetsis owns the place but risks going bankrupt pouring money into helping find the culprit and also his son and his friends when they’ve been stuck in the one restaurant he kept open to stay afloat.  Nate is the new nightguard and they decide to fuck with him to get rid of some of the boredom of being alone together in the one building for like…30 years or so.  In the end they fess up and make Nate pizza as an apology and they’re chill again

- sister locatioN dicksis au - I already summarised a thing i wrote of it in response to an anon but I’ll include here too.  Once again Ghetsis owns all the shit with the animatronics.  Anthea and Concordia get killed by one of them when they were young so years later Ghetsis sends N down to ‘free’ them (surprise he only wanted to get rid of N) but since their spirits have been fused into one hideous amalgamation of animatronics they’ve gone a bit loopy and want to leave.  The whole scooping room thing ensues and they accidentally turn their brother into a zombie

- Nombie au bc Z is a sideways N heheh I ahven’t thought up much of the background for it but it involves Plasma being a pharmaceutical company that is sort of accidentally being the cause of it.  N gets separated from his dad who ends up being the leader of a large group of people in a little town sort of thing they were able to reclaim but is Sad bc he thinks his son is dead which ends up being half true bc surprise N is half immune and ends up being a conscious zombie boy who wears a curtain as a cloak so he doesnt immediately frighten people bc he got his eye shot out by hillbilies, his face scratched up, his throat bitten out and his heart impaled on a pole (hes a freak without a human heart geddit) zombie apocalypse stuff happens

- isolatioN au - basically spawned from the thought of ’what if N was kept even more hidden away/locked up/never even left at all’.  Plasma is instead secretly in the Pokemon poaching/hunting/selling business but are disguised as…well you already know about Plasma.  The nuvema kiddos had varying levels of rough childhood and were desperate for money so they all joined up; the toutous as night guards and the dualrival s as researchers.  Hidden deep in the facility is a certain tree haired manchild who has been kept in a cage for pretty much his entire life.  Ghetsis does a mother gothel and makes out its to keep him safe and brings him Pokemon to ask about where they live and what other kinds of Pokemon live there so that Ghetsis can release them safely back into the wild go hunt for more Pokemon in the area if there’s anything good there

There’s a few more that I have but I won’t include them because im worried it’d be a waste of time if no one takes interest in any of these but uh thanks for asking and reading if you did!!!

[crimsxnrebellion-blog]

So, I’m gonna be dumb for a bit and just...literal word vomit for a bit. Stress, depression, and general anxiety have kicked in harder than hell this past week and I need an outlet. I don’t really have anyone to talk to about it so this is what’s happening so maybe I won’t worry people? And if you do read this (I expect no one will, and I don’t expect anyone to because I’m just going to come off as a whiny little shit) you have no reason to worry. I’m stable now. In a midzone of numbness with an edge of all the bad junk that comes out once in a while. I just need to work through some stuff. I’ll relate it to my blog in this way: activity is going to be garbage, even though I have like one thread going here and a few on discord.

So I guess I’ll start with what I know is a trigger for all this bad juju: my job. Yeah, everyone hates their job. Why don’t you just quit? Why don’t you get a new job? (BTW asking me any question like this or variation does not help, and I can’t imagine it helps anyone else in a similar situation either, just saiyan) The short answer to those questions right now is that I’m going on a cruise at the end of the year, and I hate to get a job and be like, “Hey, I need a week and some odd days off in December, that cool?” right off the bat.

As many of you know, I work in retail. Customer service in retail. For seven years now. And it is just the most soul sucking and depressing job I think I could have. Like...my coworkers don’t even make it worthwhile any more. I go to work and I just feel like absolute dogshit. And, when I don’t, someone, whether it’s an entitled customer or management, just ruins any semblance of a good mood I had. The place just makes me feel worthless. The work is unfulfilling. Now that I work more hours, I make enough money but...ugh. The money isn’t worth it. The money isn’t worth feeling this way every day. It’s not worth the long hours, the weird hours, the leniency on needing days off...This shit isn’t worth my sanity and my life but I feel trapped right now. It’s so hard to be patient. 

I wish I could quit and just spend my days writing but I can’t do that. My dad is retiring at the end of the year and, since I’m living with them at the moment, I pay them some money for rent and help with groceries. And it isn’t a lot, but it helps them out with their bills and I should pay them to live here. I’m twenty five; there’s not reason I should expect them to take care of me. I don’t want them to, even if they would to an extent. I just need to hold out a little longer...deal with the bullshit for a few more months...

Next item is...a little harder to talk about. Like even to myself. Tried with my brother but talking to him is hard even though he can most relate to what I’m going through (depression and anxiety wise).

I’m not a lovey dovey person. Like I’ve suspected that I’m aromantic and just...incapable of loving someone. But I knew that wasn’t true because I was...am in love with someone. Well, why don’t you tell them, Momo? Let them know how you feel? Shit, I’d give this advice, and I wish I had ages ago. I’m kicking myself so hard, and I just feel stupid. I was too slow because I was coward. I was scared to be rejected. I was scared to ruin the friendship I had built with them over the years, easily one of the best friends I have, even though it’s long distance. 

So that story...it’s not hard to guess after this outpouring. I’ve been friends with this person for years (like 5 or 6? I’m not sure). Started out as a crush but developed into more as time went on. Typical shit. Thing is...I never told her because I was sure she wasn’t into other women. I thought she was straight and would never date me. The long distance didn’t help for her either, I don’t think. At least, that’s what I had gleaned from all of our conversations. So, that helped keep my blossoming emotions in check: 1. she’s not into girls, 2. she doesn’t like long distance, and 3. don’t fuck up a friendship that you would absolutely hate to lose because you already know you hate when you don’t talk to her for even a day. How somehow you miss her even though you’ve never officially gotten a chance to meet. It seems so dumb because I doubt she thinks that but...fuck, here I am.

As expected, she got a boyfriend. Which is great, don’t get me wrong. I was happy she found someone. After all the shit she has been through, she deserves a good relationship with someone who treats her right and makes her happy. I want her to be happy, most of all. He seems like a good guy, save for a few things that have happened but that’s a relationship for you; there are going to be ups and downs. For a while, my Three Reasons held up with jealousy popping it’s ugly head in every once in a while. I also had school and ex roommate drama to distract me, so that helped.

It wasn’t until there was a mention of her thinking he MIGHT MIGHT propose that I just...broke. I told her that’s exciting, and if it DID happen I would be happy for her but...I don’t remember what all was said but she sensed that I just shut down, that I was fleeing into myself because I had zero chance with her left. No matter how many times I whispered to myself that she would never love me like I did her anyway, that it would never happen anyway...it tore me up inside. I have a feeling she had figured it out before this...that when we said I love you to each other, mine didn’t mean quite the same thing her’s did. And she called me out on it. I admitted to it, late as I was to the party. 

And then it was the most bittersweet moment when she told me if she wasn’t with her bf, she would probably give dating me a shot. My heart soared but felt heavy. My chest tight and of course I was still crying. For once, it wasn’t that I wasn’t good enough for someone. It was because I didn’t say anything. I didn’t tell them how I felt, and somehow, that felt worse than not being enough. Even as I write this, I can’t decide if I’m sad or angry at myself.

And I feel so gross thinking any of this because she is happy. For the past week I’ve been trying to shut it all out again, especially because she has enough on her plate without worrying about me being sad. I hate that this part of me exists. That it keeps me from being 100% fully happy for her in this situation. That a tiny, minuscule, disgusting .05% part of my nature is hoping it won’t work out. And it’s so so so so so so so gross and it makes me sick that it’s a reality, and pushing it off as human nature and just hurting or being in love doesn’t make me hate myself less for even that tiny bit that feels that way.

There was a part of me that night that said I should just...stop talking to her, there were moments before. Once where I offered it because her bf didn’t like us talking, and I didn’t want to wreck their relationship. But I couldn’t stand the thought of losing my best friend because I’m dumb and caught feelings. And we still talk obvs; her finding out (or vocalizing that she knew) didn’t disgust her, thankfully. And, after my mental breakdown early this week (only partially related to this whole thing; an episode at work with a customer like SUPER LYING about an interaction I had with them and my manager seeming to take their side over mine plus coming home and accidentally hurting my mom’s dog’s leg and she yelled cuz she was worried and not mad at me but my emotions just exploded anyway, I threw my phone, and left for an hour or two, ugly crying in my car as I drove). But she helped me come out of that...out of this state of absolute emotional turmoil that I can barely remember super clearly. 

(btw if you read this bebe I’m not mad at you in any way, shape, or form and I don’t want you to worry about me. Like I said...this is just me word vomitting. Working through all of my fucked up feels. You focus on you ok?)

So that brings me to that mental breakdown cuz wow. I haven’t had a REALLY bad one like that in a while. And it was a lot of things building up. Fear of the future. Will going back to school pay off. Would I ever be able to quit this fucking job that is killing me. Just feeling helpless, hopeless, and worthless in general for so long. And I think it all just festered up and welled over until I finally just...broke. Completely broke. And it was scary. I wanted to die. I wasn’t at a point of hurting myself or killing myself but...there were a few moments where I wanted it all to end. But yeah...it’s...been awhile since I’ve gotten that low, and I’m not sure I’ve fully recovered? Like I should probably get help but...I dunno. 

wow. This got long. I feel liek I have more to work through but eh. I’m getting sleepy and just ugh. Plus I have work at 5:30 am ;-;. So me @ me is saying go to bed. should probably keep a journal for shit liek this cuz I think this helped some. Just to word vomit....