#i worry if they hate me online what if they do irl. what if im too ugly and annoying :(
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
montied · 2 months ago
Text
at least if she does go through with it i can just go to seymour and no-one will know. what're they gonna do about it
9 notes · View notes
saint-lajka · 3 months ago
Text
the nervouserrr <- guy who is going to london a few days after he gets back from america
8 notes · View notes
thetisming · 5 months ago
Text
im actually really worried that im not that interested in &j anymore like ivd been having a hard time writing about it and talking about it online and i mean i talk about it a lot irl but idk like people have been knowing more than me and im starting to feel so incredibly inferior that it's hard for me to enjoy it
#im in this group chaf and im the only one there that doesnt live in new york snf doesnt know any og them irl and theyall know more and see#it a lot and know about the swing order and i dont and ive been feeling so bad about it and it's been so hard for me and then i have friends#that are clearlv better at fandom in general than me so theyre better at characterisation so if i get criticisrd i just feel Terrible and i#havent properly wtitten in ages caude ive been so worried about my characterisation cause a friend very gently criticised me on my character#isation like 2 months ago and i really look up to this person so now i just cant Do anything#and also the thing that they eere pointing out wad more anothrr friend's thing that i didn't even Like much but if someone talks enough i#can be persuaded to anything and also because im just terrified do i#'ll go along with literally anything just because i dont want poeple to hate me#and it's ruining my enjoyment and i mean i made an au and i was hoping that that would make it so that i could maybe write again but nobody#carrd so now i judt cant#i feel so broken right now#also people that were meant to be &j friends are now friend friends and i mean thats Fine#but i cant! handle it!!!#i cant talk about other things unless it's My other things#and i especially cant talk about five nights at freddy's because i used to be hyperfixated on that so now that im.not i just cant! talk abou#t it! or hear about it!!!#not to mention that that game fucking destroyed my life when i was 9 because everyone liked it but i didn't know what it eas anf they wouldn#t explain so now i judt CANT hear about it!!!!!!#i cant do it i cant. do this#i miss when it brought me so much joy but now i hate talking about it online and i cant do it anymore#i can't pretend to care i can't keep being an &j blog even though i do love it!!!! but i feel so insecure and inferior that i just cant!!!!!#i hate this so mcuh im sorry i needrd to get this out#i dont have anything interesting to say anymore and i mean there's also just like. the whole being autistic thing and not wanting peopel to#judge me for my interests which they have my whole life and now it's too much and i cant care this much anymore. i just can't#i dont have anything to contribute either i cant draw and i can't write anymore and i just dont know what to do#sorry
6 notes · View notes
skunkes · 1 year ago
Text
Answering dis ask chopped up too
Tumblr media Tumblr media
thank u, but my situation isnt that dire! Thats where half the problem comes from, i struggle because its really not that bad here, i just would like to leave for the regular reasons anyone would wanna leave home (+ being trans), that joke about what you dont pay in rent by living with your parents, you pay with your mental health etc etc
16 notes · View notes
snekdood · 3 months ago
Text
idc if ppl think im problematic i just want it to be for the actual real reasons i am
#like... im kinda aggressive and might attack if provoked... i intentionally exude a threatening presence and personality to#scare ppl away but also bc i will actually try to fuck you up if you fuck with me too much. i also struggle with not knowing#how to handle my cat yelling besides yelling at him which reinforces him but it doesnt matter bc he does it anyways even#if i stubbornly ignore him so idfk what to do i think he just think thats the normal way to talk atp and it driveS ME INSANE BECAUSE#HE IS MOEWS ARE SO LOUD AND SOUND LIKE A FUCKING BABY CRYING WHICH TRIGGERS A PRIMAL PARENTAL THING IN#ME AND HES MANIPULATING THAT TO GET MY ATTENTION FOR SHIT HE DOESNT NEED HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#LIke. im problematic in some ways. no im not as problematic as you might think but like. i still recognize i got a lot of shit to work on#over here yaknow. its shit i think about all the time and keep trying to figure out what i can do about.#which is also why i dont need ppl riding on my ass about shit that i already know better about#i honestly think yall think me being inflammatory online makes me a bad person... idk. and i dont really think im all that controversial#or inflammatory in what i say but anyone being that in any capacity in your opinion makes them Bad for some reason?? idrk.#im trying to figure it out. like you either just have to believe any lie someone tells about me or you just hate how annoying i am to you#on the internet. something you can easily avoid by blocking me.#also the things i say online... dont necessarily directly translate to offline? im not really like this irl... im definitely a lot more#aggressive online than i am off...#offline i try to keep things calm and gentle and i try to be considerate and nice to those around me. ig i dont feel like tumblr#has earned that side of me yet 🤷#i literally have an idyllic ass garden and essentially green house ok. i dont talk about the happenings of my daily life on here#much bc i worry talking about it on here will taint it somehow.#maybe im too superstitious. maybe im worried about being stalked. maybe its a combo of many things but theres certain info#i dont trust with certain types of people and if tumblr was a person i would not trust that person with that info.#the friend to get drunk with not to watch your cats and house while you're out of town. etc.#ill vent about my trauma but i dont want you... in my life... Like That lmao. we just go to the same bar...
0 notes
clockworkreapers · 1 month ago
Text
Update to this. cuz guess who just got a second bill. mhm this ones unrelated, still high, but capitalism frankly is hell and my jobs yes JOBS with an S are not able to cover this. My last paycheck with everyone's help has covered up to half- but that's like with all comms too. I am literally full up between doing all the work u see normally commissions and irl jobs. Idk what it is about these past few months but my god wtf.
This is just if anyone can help out and if you have been liking everything I've been making as of recent. I'll still be making things so I can stay somewhat calm and sane. Still survival mode is not fun, would not wish this on anyone.
WILDLY DIF POST BUT OH MAN
guess who just got hit with the US healthcare system mallet? Yeah me. A 3000$ one (specifically 3206.25$).
I hate to do this but If anyone has the ability to help, be you a friend, caring person or someone who enjoys my work… if you can lend any amount cuz dear god I need to get over my pride and just be like ok I actually need a hand with this
I'll likely be opening comms too if you want to get something in return- but that means the rest of my work and life is put on pause till I can recover. So if anyone at all is able to help with a couple bucks that would be incredible.
44 notes · View notes
luxiomahariel · 2 months ago
Note
Hey hey! Wanted to share an experience n get it off my chest if that’s okay, you don’t gotta post it if you don’t want to. This experience is what led me to discover transandrophobia and devour as much as I could of it and I’m also reading so much intersectional feminism as a result!
Ages back, a group of former “friends” that were all adult lesbians of varying transfem and nonbinary genders, unironically Exploded at me due to a conversation that I’ve since showed a vast amount of people who have all confirmed that I was being respectful and agreeable throughout. The gist of the convo was that I “wasn’t listening to transfems” because I, as someone who grew up as a brown arab woman, simply MENTIONED that Imane Khelif was being attacked through racism as well as transmisogyny. For context, I agreed multiple times that she was being attacked through both, but the group was immediately vehemently accusing me of denying transmisogny as a “tme��.
They kicked me from the server, and the owner dmed me a link to @/transmisogny-explained so I could “better myself”, which is a blog that has plenty of good posts, but is so deeply transandrophobic that it makes it difficult to even look through. During the aftermath of this whole thing, my partners had dmed some folks from the server to clarify what had happened for them to react so intensely, and I’ll quote some of the things I noticed from them/their responses:
- every single one of them was white.
- ONLY used he/him for me during this despite rarely/never doing so otherwise. I use any pronouns.
- described me reblogging transmasc positivity posts on my personal blog afterwards as “going on a reblogging rampage” and describing my emoji-filled, friendly, worried messages as “aggressive” and “lashing out after being criticized by a trans woman Once”.
- one said that they’ve been wanting to cut me off since they found out I support trans men lesbians. Because I call myself a multigender dyke and am a man as well as a woman.
- same person also spread that I was calling trans women slurs because I had once reblogged a post where someone mentioned “b/aeddels”
- shortly after they all blocked me on all platforms, my partners showed me their reblogs were absolutely full of the most transandrophobic slop I’ve ever seen, mixed in with good posts about supporting transfems. They also masked off about other queer infighting, such as being on the wrong, cruel side of ace discourse and also needlessly hating on mspec lesbians, anyone using Achillean or the “toothpaste flag” or anything that “appropriated lesbian culture”, and stuff like that.
- turned on my partners as well (tho with less vitriol thank god) for being associated with me. Which they didn’t deserve to be cut off for :(
Basically I’m more than glad to be cut off from them cuz I had no clue of the sheer hatred they were holding for queer people that were different from them, but also I can’t ever help but keep in mind that one of the quickest ways I’ve ever gotten to be called a man, or had he/him used on me, was alongside being called “tme” and being painted as an aggressor.
Everyone involved is safely out irl, and knows fully that I am deeply closeted for safety irl. They spoke plenty of my “tme privilege” while knowing I was at home closeted against my will for my safety and suffering from it on the daily. They labeled me as a rampaging, lashing out tme man, despite rarely using anything but she/they for me beforehand. They cut me off from a huge portion of online community, knowing full well how unsafe my position was and how much I needed the support. I’ll never forget that they saw a closeted brown trans man mention racism alongside transmisogny and immediately jumped him and slandered his name with accusations and aggressive behavior.
jesus christ thats awful
bigotry always seems to come in bunches huh? transandrophobia, aphobia, homophobia, and exorsexism/enbyphobia.... yeesh.
im glad you got away from that server and hopefully my blog can be a safe space for you 🫂
50 notes · View notes
luciaintheskyainthi · 23 days ago
Note
Hii, i admire you a lot, every chapter of ECM encourages me a lot, i hope yo are well and im sorry for the bad english in my cuestion😭
Your best writing tips? Everything is valid, whether writing in general o writing fanfics, whatever you think for sure is good, thanks for writing 🙏💗😔
thank-you so much!! I'm glad my writing can do that for you!!
Oh man, I have soooo many things to say, but I'll give you some simplified ones to start with! Buckle up buttercup, this is a long'un!
General Writing Tips:
I know it sounds dumb! But just write. Write a little, write a lot, just try not to get bogged down with it being 'good' or 'bad' or anywhere in between. I'm a firm believer in writing being like a muscle: the more you do it, the easier (and the better) it becomes. And also, crucially, this shouldn't be a time where you do things like... a) hunting for the perfect word b) doing research c) cross reference with a past chapter This is a writing only time! Make yourself place holders (I write XK for words I can't think of, as it's 2 letter that will never appear together so I can CTRL+F it easily! I make comments in the draft specifying what to check or research. I highlight parts I know need LOTS of work) so you can quickly move past what's blocking you and continue writing.
Find a writing habit and environment that works for you. Typing? Hand-writing? Coloured pages? White pages? Dictating? Working in a public place? A private space? (When I start out a story, I often handwrite. And I'll turn back to it if I'm stuck, too. I also write a lot in public, as I find the pressure of other people around me stops me wasting time on my phone... or Tumblr lol).
Get yourself a writing friend! I have a friend I see almost weekly and it's my most productive time of the week (For example, today I wrote 5600 words! Crazy!). Online works too (if you use the pomodoro, you can compare word counts, make a competition of it). If you're doing it IRL, DO NOT expect to get anything done the first time. Or the second time.... but the more you do it, the easier it is for you both to fall straight into writing. (This is the exact same advice I giving to my students about 'study dates' 😉 )
If you find it hard to 'break the seal', then try a warm up. Set yourself a 5-10 minute timer and write based on an activity. E.g. tell a story from the POV of an object in your room! Write a detailed description of your foot! Write a 5 sentence story! Find a picture and write a scene inspired by it! Or get yourself a prompt list and use that. These are all things I would do for students back when I ran a creative writing club at school.
Use the pomodoro system when writing (it's great for studying too!). That's 20 minutes of nothing but writing - no searching up stuff! No looking at your phone! Just writing. Then take a 5 minute break. Then another 20 minutes of writing. Rinse and Repeat! You'd be amazed at how much you can get done!
THIS ONE IS SO IMPORTANT: 👏 The first thing you write is the worst thing you write! That's not just okay! It's expected!! 👏 This is something I tell ALL my students and equally myself. The editing process is SO crucial and honestly, the best thing you can do to improve is - and you'll hate me for saying this! - rewrite your entire first draft. This is why I say, 'don't worry about the first thing you've written'. Because it won't be the end product. (This is why I so often hand-write. Because typing it up then becomes the rewrite.) The re-write is when you should be thinking carefully about your phrasing, and when you can go and do that research. (I will note, I actually don't do this much anymore, but I've also been writing obsessively for 19 years... so do with that what you will (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)
Read your work out loud. What reads fine in your head might come out as nonsense out loud. This is especially true for dialogue! The better it flows out your fabulous mouth, the better it reads. I've done this so much I've mostly internalised it, but I always always do my final edit as a read through out loud. All 140+K of ECM has come out my gob at least once.
Actual writing tips:
When it comes to sentence structure and phrasing, one of the best things I ever did for myself was read the book Sin and Syntax by Constance Hale. I don't expect every writer to do so, but I do think it's worth reading (I'd like to specify, I generally HATE reading non-fiction but I found it a valuable read).
Here are a few things to keep in mind when actually writing:
Bad repetition: it's a classic, but overuse of certain words sticks out like a sore thumb. Even now I'll do it and won't notice until the final read through (out loud! See my previous tip haha). That is NOT to say that you should just right click 'synonyms'! It's better to edit the sentence itself, think about whether that word is even necessary before choosing to select another word).
Nuance in language is soooo important. This is why I generally discourage just the right-click 'synonym' option. Certainly in the nonsensical English language, there are subtleties in word choice that are critical to preventing your work for turning into nonsense (something I wish my students would understand!). Think of the different meanings conveyed through choices like house / bungalow / condo / flat / apartment / mansion / Mcmansion. All have differing connotations and can't be used interchangeably. Same with floor vs ground. Make sure you understand the connotations (associated meanings) of the word you're choosing before you use it.
Following on from this, Choose specific nouns and dynamic verbs, rather than relying on your adjectives/adverbs to do all the work. Not ' one storey house': bungalow. Not 'walk tiredly': stumble / trudge. Of course, you don't have to do this all the time and I'm not saying adverbs/adjectives are evil! But I think a lot of writers become overly reliant upon them.
Avoid redundant language. Consider the words that are doing the heavy lifting in your sentences. Is there anything in the sentence that doesn't need to be there because you've already implied it? e.g. Sara trudged tiredly into her bedroom and fell onto her bed. In this example, 'trudged' already implies exhaustion. And one would assume her bed is in her bedroom. Likewise 'fall' isn't the most exciting of verbs. So I'd change it to something like this -> Sara trudged through the doorway to collapse onto her bed. (Note here I'm also thinking of the implied meaning of 'onto' rather than 'into', which would suggest her bed is still made up).
Keep in mind who your narrator is and adjust your writing accordingly. Consider their personality, their background and the influence of their culture on the ways in which they'd think / write things. For example, as Peter is a character prone to ramble, I'll sometimes have him do the same in his narration. And because he's a silly little guy, I'll also have his train of thoughts turn in silly ways. His science background means I'll occasionally throw in a science reference too (though it's not my strongest knowledge base these days! So it requires more research lol). In contrast, Jason's love of literature make him more likely to use 'fancy' words like 'eschew', literary references and more elaborate metaphors. But at the same time, his Crime Alley upbringing means I have him use a lot of contractions. And because I see him as a character who is both a dramatic bastard and a highly efficient guy, I will use a lot of one word, or very short sentences. (If you're using multiple narrators, it might pay to write these ideas down!)
Anyways, I could go on, but it's also 20 to 11PM here and I've already written 5600 words today 🥲 My phalanges are tired!
I at least hope you can find something helpful or encouraging from all of this!
34 notes · View notes
fatuismooches · 1 month ago
Note
I used to love scrolling through the Dottore x Reader tag on Tumblr until I stumbled upon your account and ended up binge-reading all of your posts. [I would spam-like all your posts, but I’m unsure if spam-liking is unwelcome! (/--)/] I just have to say, your writing and characterization of Dottore and his segments are by far the best I’ve ever read and seen???? Honestly, it’s my favourite portrayal of Dottore, and your writing is just so immaculate??? The emotions and details are perfect, and it’s always such a joy to read and visualize everything in my head. If I had to describe it with a physical feeling, your writing feels warm, fun, freeing, and safe—like lying in a field of grass under a night sky, with warm winds brushing against my skin. \(^-^)/
I love your versions of the segments, too! They all feel so unique, and there’s such variety in your portrayal of them. I love how each segment gets its share of love. The interactions between the reader, Prime, and the segments never feel awkward—everything feels balanced and fair. I used to be really unsure about segments x reader content, but you’ve made me fall in love with them all. The way you give each segment so much personality while ensuring none of them overshadow the others is just incredible?? IF THAT MAKES SENSE—I’M JUST RAMBLING I FEAR— TLDR: YOUR WRITING MAKES MY EYES AND HEART EXPLODE WITH HAPPINESS. (*^ー^)ノ♪
AND THE ANGST WRITING TOO??? UGH, MY HEART. IT’S SO PAINFUL. I LITERALLY TEAR UP AND CHOKE UP EVERY TIME YOU WRITE ANGST. [PLEASE, SEGMENTS AND PRIME DOTTORE LIVE FOREVER!!! MY HEART CANT HANDLE THAT PAIN- AND THAT LATEST ONE ABOUT OMEGA AND READER HAD ME DOWN ON THE GROUND, UNABLE TO GET UP. (/_;)/] But seriously, your work has made me so much more attached to Dottore than ever before. Sometimes I even find it hard to go through the Dottore x Reader tag nowadays because I’ve developed such a heavy bias and preference for your characterization of him. It’s such a refreshing take on the character and I absolutely adore it. \(^-^)/
Also, I’m just in general a sucker for villains being soft for their lover, and the fragile reader concept you explore on this blog is just chef’s kiss.
Please write forever, I don't know what I'll do with my nightly reading time without your delicious dottore content /lh /pos
Also, your blog is so organized it saves me so much time as someone who frequently gets losT online and irl
CAN I BE 💀🎉 ANON???? I'VE NEVER BEEN AN ANON THING BEFORE IDK HOW TO DO THIS
SORRY FOR THE WORD VOMIT MY MIND HAS LIKE 3938328 THINGS RUNNING AT ONCE AND WANTS TO SAY THEM ALL IN ONE GO
ANON??!? IM LITERALLY GOING TO CRY I NEED A MOMENT TO BREATHE WHO LET YOU BE SO KIND- IWHDEUWIDHEW
FIRST OF ALL, THANK U FOR THIS ILY 😭🙏 I'm super happy you like my writing and characterization of Dottore, your praise makes my heart happy and want to continue to write *hugs* 💕! (and feel free to spam like, it doesn't bother me and it makes me smile actually!)
I'M GLAD I MADE YOU LIKE SEGMENTS FICS TOO??😭🥺 that's a huge compliment bfbewfe imo the segments are underrated in fics and need more love so to know i converted you just makes me go 🥹🥹🥹🤏💙💙💙💕🥺 FELLOW SEGMENT LOVER!!!! I VERY MUCH ADORE YOUR RAMBLING ANON!! your praise for my writing is far too high i fear- i just write what my whimsical heart tells me to 🫶 i think ur the one making my eyes and heart explode!!! >.<
AHH IM HOLDING U TIGHTLY DURING THE ANGST FBEWFEW I PROMMY EVERYONE IS ALIVE!!!! I'm also glad you liked the Omega fic hehe i was worried it didn't have the usual oomph BUT IT SEEMS I DID MY JOB!!! (secretly love-hate writing angst bc it makes me sad but i also love reactions like these-) It's always the nicest thing when people love Dottore more thanks to my writing, it's truly so cute!! I love spreading the doter love... 💞💞💞
SUPER GLAD YOU LOVE THAT TROPE TOO!!! IT IS MY LIFE'S BLOOD!! i prommy to write forever for you dear 💀🎉 anon (funny emoji combo) I WILL MAKE YOUR NIGHTS THE BEST NIGHTS!! also glad to see you appreciate my organization, i am actually proud of my blog's structure hehe
U DON'T NEED TO APOLOGIZE!!! I LOVED THIS ASK SM IM STORING IT SAFELY!!
21 notes · View notes
am-i-the-asshole-official · 9 months ago
Note
aita for flirting with my online friend 🌐❓
i (20s, trans man) have been getting closer to my online friend (same as me). we were mutuals for a while in what i can best describe as an online writing community but only started actually talking last year when i approached him to do a project together. we've been pretty strictly platonic for the last year but this year it's ramped up a bit (in part i think due to greater proximity)- we make a lot of sexual jokes at each other. now that's not necessarily a big deal because we do it at other male (and not male in his case) friends of ours, its just sort of how our circle interacts with each other, but it's a bit different for me because i do actually have somewhat of a crush on him. i'm not super sure of how he feels towards me, but i do think he knows at least partially how i feel and is at least humouring our banter.
now here's where i feel like an asshole. i have no intention of dating him at all- even if he does like me back, the reality is that we live on two entirely separate continents and neither of us have the financial means to go see each other. now you could suggest we date long distance or online but i've done that like 4 different times now with 4 different people and i just know it doesn't work for me, for a variety of reasons i won't get into. just trust me when i say it would end poorly. i'm not on speaking terms with any of my exes (nor do i want to be, bar one) and my friend is important enough to me that if we ended up like that then i'd be really upset about it. usually when i break up with someone or am broken up with i'm left with a lot of resentment and bitterness. plus our writing project would be tanked, which i'm not willing to jeopardise because i think it's excellent, he's a great partner.
in addition to that i'm only a few months out of a pretty rough breakup with someone i also had viewed as a close friend (irl, not online). i'm not conflating them here, because they aren't alike whatsoever, but i worry that im using my friend as an emotional rebound to cope with what my ex did to me, even if he doesn't know it. i don't want my ex back and i am honestly still feeling a lot of anger towards him, so it's been nice putting my attention and libido elsewhere. however i know how shitty it feels to be someone else's rebound guy and would hate to do that to my friend. plus i could be stunting my own healing progress?? idk
it initially was just a bit of fun but i've had to privately and seriously talk myself down from getting jealous as fuck when my friend has had other people jokingly (or not jokingly, who knows) flirt with him. i'm a pretty intense person (hi, bpd) so i've been trying to reign myself back and keep things chill and funny between us but i'm getting kind of concerned whether i should stop entirely so my feelings go away or if im fine enjoying giving and being given attention in return, even if it doesn't lead anywhere. even just liking him is kind of breaking three of the rules i'd set for myself after my last few relationship disasters (no more online stuff, no more white boys, let my brain cool down and dont be interested in anyone for at least a year) so i kind of just don't know where i should be taking this if anywhere
45 notes · View notes
justalilpearlie · 6 months ago
Text
!! Intro !! (updated)
Hello everyone, my name is PearlescentMoon
Hihi! I'm Pearl! Magic is quite a fine name aswell. Although I'm a man of many names ;)
I am a minor, my gender labels are gendervoid verinix, tho I also ID as bigender and ftm (fem presenting tho! not transmasc, just trans man)! I'm queer, leaning on mlm, tho I also like girls here and there.
I go by He/Xe. I can She/Her myself + close friends/mutuals are allowed, but refrain from doing so without explicit permision please. (I also use neos: Void/Moon/Sweet/It/Fluff/Love/Fizz/Paw)
I'm from Argentina, born and raised, never moved. Speak fluent english and spanish.
I'm autistic and I have ADHD aswell as BPD and a few other things I wont list right now! But yeah I'm psychotic (ooo scary word.. lmao)
Matching with @teapot-of-tyrahn !!
- -🌄-📀-🌙- -💚- -💛- -✨-🌄-✨- -💛- -💚- -🌙-📀-🌄- -
I'm an IRL of many, mainly c!Pearl (mcyt), c!Magic(outsmp+psmp), Samuel Emily (fnaf [games canon]) and Shin Tsukimi (yttd). If you don't like it you can leave, block me, or whatever, cause you aint gonna change my life or how I am. I'm in therapy, which unlike random hate and harrassment online, does help me :)
I like to stream, roleplay, draw, sometimes make playlists or moodboards.. And my biggest interests right now are the Outsiders SMP, The Hatchetfield Musicals, Life Series and Empires 1.
I use kin tags for reach cause I'd love interaction from any mediamates!! Specially from Outsiders <3
Fictionkins, therians and traumagenic systems all welcome!
- -💥-🐺-🌙- -❤️- -💛- -✨-💥-✨- -💛- -❤️- -🌙-🐺-💥- -
DNI prefferably:
- Basic DNI criteria (proshippers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, TERFs, ableist, etc)
- Endos/non-traumagenic "systems" DNI. block me if u want, i wont argue abt it in the comments/reblogs. or interact if u want but im not gonna follow u back or anythin shrugs.
- reality checkers or anti-IRLs DNI. I aint "romanticizing" shit, I'm existing and living my life, if thats a problem to you too bad cause my psychologist aproves of what I'm doing, since I aint harming anyone and I myself am doing dandy.
- anti-kin also DNI cause most of my friends are fictionkins and if you talk shit abt my fellas idk i wouldnt like having u around much
CCs I'd rather if you didn't interact, but if you shall do so anyways, do so at your own risk, you've been warned. /lh
- -🪸-🐸-🌙- -💙- -🩵- -✨-🪸-✨- -🩵- -💙- -🌙-🐸-🪸- -
"Disclaimer"
- I talk about MajorMoon (Scott x Pearl) a LOT, if u didnt notice by the acc theme. These are my romantic memories, its a gay ship, not woman/gay man, so if it makes u uncomfortable or u hate it or whatever then ur probably not gonna like my content lmao. COUGH, consider joining us if you do like what you see... /nf We're a small comunity of supporters.. just me.. and a few of my peeps... that was a joke, sir. /ref
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
- This isn't roleplay, its my main acc where im ""unapologetically"" myself, but if u do wanna rp outsiders/life series/empires/fnaf u can always shoot me a dm and maybe I'll give u my discord.
- I talk about myself (c!Pearl) using 3rd person in many posts tagged with main fandom tags. This is to cause less confusion to casual fans slash ""normies"" (lhj) that well.. don't know what IRLs are! Also that way I feel safer and don't have to worry as much abt getting harassed and such for my identity.
- -🌸-⛰️-🌙- -💚- -💙- -✨-🌸-✨- -💙- -💚- -🌙-⛰️-🌸- -
Special People Mentions!! fps = * (1 or more.. wouldnt say in a priority sorta order but. more or less yea)
Family! <3 🌼 @pehpurr* SISTER!! YOU'RE AMAZING, DAISY. SO SO GREAT. YOUR ART IS INCREDIBLE, YOU ARE SO PASSIONATE ABOUT EVERYTHING YOU DO, YOU ARE SO VERY CARING FOR OTHERS, SO KIND AND TALENTED, A GREAT WRITER AND THE BEST BEST SISTER I COULD EVER ASK FOR!! Scar, you changed my life, you were there for me when I needed you the most, I know you ALWAYS have my back. You're kind to me even when the world isn't, and know that even if we fight or if you do things I disagree with (ehem forgiving too much ppl /lht), I will never leave you, and I will never stop coming after you. I love you, Kanna. You're the best Peeps, keep it up, for you're a beacon of hope in everyone's lives. I'm so proud. ♡ ⚙️ @gentlexmadman DAD!! I FREAKING LOVE YOU DAD OMG!! I am SO very happy we got to spend our first fathers day together even if just a little, you made this the first year I was actually happy to celebrate it, looking forward to it and making a gift of my own :) Im so so happy to have you in my life. You are, likewise to Pepper, an AMAZING artist, so much detail, just so awesome in general. I love hearing all your silly stories about work and the people you know, old man. Thank you for being with me, papá, I never thought I'd actually find you again. Thank you so so very much. ♡
🐸 @bigb-enthusiast SIBLING!! MY SIBLING IN ZAYA OH MY GOODNESS IS THAT USER BIGB ENTHUSIAST?? YES IT SURE IS!! Bro I could listen to ur analysis and rambles til the end of the world u got the best ideas ever wtf!!?? Ur very freakin insane but also ur my best buddy, my nosey neighbor for life!! I appreciate u a lot, Bee, my favorite insane asylum escapee ♡
🔪 @skywardspecter OECAAAAA HEY ZACH ILYSM BROTHER!! YOUR ROLEPLAY AND WRITINGS ARE AAAAA-MAZE-ING !! I RLLY WANNA MEET U IRL!! UR SO GOOD AT ROLEPLAY AND ART, YOU'RE SO CREATIVE AND BRIGHT UR LIKE A BALL OF SUNSHINE!! U PUT UP W A LOT RUNNING SM SERVERS BUT U ALWAYS GET BACK UP AND I THINK THATS ADMIRABLE!! AND IDK VIANS TUMBLR BUT SHOT OUT TO VIAN AND ORCA TOO !! VIANS SUCH A GREAT SUPPORTIVE FRIEND FR NO MATTER WHAT AND ORCA IS SUCH A KIND AND FUNNY GUY, VERY UNDERSTANDING <33 I LOVE U GUYS!! U MAKE ME FEEL SAFE, LIVE LAUGH LOVE MAGIC MAZE ♡
🥣 @rennyus SOUP OMGGG HAI SIBLIIIING ILYSM !!! GGHHH YOU. YOU ARE SO GREAT AND PATIENT WITH ME, YOU'RE ALWAYS THERE FOR ME WHEN I NEED YOU AND YOU'VE NEVER EVER JUDGED ME FOR ANYTHING!! I LOOOOVE HEARING ABT UR MEMORIES THEYRE ALWAYS SO SO SWEET <33 I RLLY HOPE U FIND UR WIVES SOMEDAY CAUSE ALL I WANT IS TO SEE U HAPPY SIB ♡
🐟 Aussi, MY AMAZING COUSIN OMG?? IDK UR USER HERE BUT!! WE'VE BEEN THRU SOOO SO MUCH TOGETHER, EVEN WITH THE PERIODS WE DONT TALK MUCH IN, I LOOOOVE GETTING INTO THINGS U LIKE OR WHEN U TAKE THE TIME TO GET INTO THE STUFF I ENJOY TOO!!! UR FRIENDS ARE ALSO VERY SILLY N I LOVE PLAYIN PHASMO WITH YALL! I LOOOVE ALL THE MEMORIES WE SHARE TOGETHER AND THESE TWO YEARS OF COUSINSHIP HAVE BEEN AMAZING!! TO MANY MANY MORE YEARS COUSIN!! LOVE YOU TONS ♡
Simply special <3 ☕ @insomniac-coffeehouse** You're all simply so very special to me. I love every second we spend together. I love seeing yall thrive. I love your insane yet endearing behavior. You might be a bit unhinged sometimes, and admittedly not the healthiest person when it comes to your schedules, but I'm just so proud of everything you create and accomplish. I hope you get to accomplish all your dreams, and I hope I can be here to see that happen, if you let me :)! For many years more, cause I'm just oh so glad I met you. You spark joy in my brain and my heart <3 From the bottom of my heart, I'm in love with the hope you bring to this world. 🍊 Jack***, Oh my dearest, where do I even begin with you, sport... you trully are my soulmate, my other half... mi media naranja, if you will, heh.. Every second I get to spend with you is like heaven, no matter whats going on, I know everything will be alright cause I have you. You mean absolutely everything to me, my Hero, I know you'll always be there for me. You are the sweetest man I've ever met, and I'm so proud of the person you've become. If I had to choose between you or the world I'd choose you 10 times over, and I can say surely, that you'd do the same. I love every single detail about you, thank you for being so patient with me, you're wonderful, cielo. I love your voice, I love your eyes, I love your smile, your laughter. I love your use of words, the way you speak, your humor, your seriousness and stupidness. You stiff fuck, you were made for me and I was made for you, and I wouldn't have it any other way. You're my everything, mi vida, mi luz, mi estrella. Mi amor, mi mundo. ♡
Friends! 🏜️ @thecranewivesrpf My right hand man!! OMG we havent talked in a WHILE but ILYSM !!! MY SECOND IN COMMAND IN THE MAJORMOON SERVER FRFR!! WE SHOULD TALK AGAIN, I MISS U POOKIE </3
- -🪻-🍂-🌙- -🤎- -🩵- -✨-💒💍-✨- -🩵- -🤎- -🌙-🍂-🪻- -
Badges I've earned:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
(More TBA)
That's it for now folks, love yall and see you around!
14 notes · View notes
jewish-vents · 7 months ago
Note
i’m so, so tired. i’ve deleted almost all of my social media apps, barring tumblr. i am definitely a very political person, and have been invested in developed a deeper understanding of world history and geopolitics since i was ~12 (i’m 18 now). but i feel so drained. i’ve muted tags on here relating to palestine and the conflict in general, and i feel horrible about it bc i see people around me constantly posting about it, but i just can’t. i’ve given up. i ideologically leaned far more against the state of israel before oct 7th than i do now, and i’ve seen this amongst many of my jewish friends too. my online friends have always tended to be pro-palestine, but i never saw this much dehumanization coming from them until now. to see how hated jewish people are, to see how many people i loved thought oct 7th was justified resistance… it hurt beyond words… even my longtime irl best friend tried to explain the conflict (and was whining about me getting ben and jerry’s at a store) to me despite not knowing anything about i/p before this war. i hate being talked to like im an idiot. but if i vocalize that, im speaking over others.
i don’t like seeing images of dead children. i don’t like reading about rising death tolls. i don’t like being bombarded with brutal details about humans’ suffering. and that is all everyone online is ever talking about. and all i see people say is that i need to suck it up because there are people suffering way more than me right now, which obviously is true. but i don’t want people to think im a bad, ignorant person. and sometimes i start to believe i actually am. i was very actively posting about the war when it first started, but now as i have seen more and more how cruel people are towards jews i just don’t post much at all on anything besides tumblr. i worry my online friends think i don’t care, and especially that i somehow don’t care about palestinians, when i do, and i always have! but do i have to subject myself to such upsetting information everyday to care? why can i not be afforded a break? why aren’t jewish people allowed to mourn for the loss of life in israel and the hostages without being accused immediately of hating palestinians and wanting them dead? how come non-palestinian muslims are widely allowed to center themselves in this conversation (obviously, muslims are hurting too, though) and talk about their feelings but jews aren’t allowed to? why are jewish people not allowed to feel anything? why must we ignore one group’s suffering and insist that another’s is more important to acknowledge? why?
and i’m just scared, because i don’t know what to believe. maybe israel is somehow doing all these terrible things and im actually evil for doubting it? idk if that makes sense, but it’s how i feel. i’ve witness very disturbing behavior from both zionists and antizionists, and it’s tiring. i have seen members of the former camp saying “there are no innocents in gaza” and members of the latter saying “there are no innocents in israel”. it’s why i can’t really identify with either party, so i feel alone. by its simplest definition i am a zionist, but people have turned that word to mean a million different things that at times it just feels like its lost its meaning. and when i see someone say “zionists dni” on their acc its like… what do you even mean?
i think there are a lot of well-meaning people in the pro palestine crowd, and i don’t think that’s wishful thinking either. though obviously, there are a lot of truly vindictive people out there who have nothing but hatred in their hearts. but i now get anxious to see an account i follow post something pro-palestine. and i feel so horrible about it. i know many of these people have good intentions, but i automatically assume there is something more sinister going on, whether it’s someone i know personally or not posting about it. and i don’t want to! i want to believe most people are good! or at least decent! but i can’t.
i just wish i didn’t have to be bombarded with so much information whenever i log on to interact with fandom posts. but i worry that means i don’t care. but i really think i do… i can’t not care. but sometimes i feel like im not caring enough
.
18 notes · View notes
lolipoptheclown · 5 months ago
Text
its been two days a year daddy /ref
Hi im back! i expected that it would take way longer for me to start feeling mentally better, but the past couple days have been going shockingly well, like i got to drive a car!!!! im quite literally rick hedony u guys. uhm i have some small ratmeat doodles that i will post later+i might talk about a new oc (she's a sm oc but also not? its complicated LMAO) but uh yeah im back
also if you guys remember the guy who i said was online stalking me in that 'goodbye for now' post here's a quick (quick as in i skipped a LOT of stuff) explanation of whats going on if u wanna know (tw for just...manipulating things):
so theres this guy i used to be friends with in middle school but he did something bad+got kicked out of our friend group+moved schools but he is really obsessed with me specifically for some reason? (said he has dreams where we talk again irl, CREEPY) a lot of u guys probably havent been following me for long enough to have witnessed the next bit/never even noticed it at all anyway but he would make fake accounts pretending to be other people, befriend me, and then i would block him when i found out who it was. one time he caught me in one of my monthly mental health lows and when i called him out he was like 'im sorry i will be gone soon' and i panicked and became friends with him again cuz i didnt want him to off himself but he keeps trying to pressure me into stuff (like a drawing he made me do. i hate going through my at-home sketchbook and looking at it) like he always does+saying he will off himself if he loses me and when i get a new phone im blocking him again! im not responsible for his life! i fucking hate him, and myself for getting into this situation!
im just worried he will start stalking me again once he gets his own phone. but i dont have to worry about that for now!
4 notes · View notes
transexualpirate · 9 months ago
Note
You spend your time here fighting terfs, and sometimes you can’t even respond with a proper argument lol. Focus on the MEN that end the lives of trans people like you they are more important I suppose terfs might disagree with you and so do I but they don’t kill you. I’m beginning to believe the only reason misogyny exist from trans people and cis men towards women is because women don’t kill and commit atrocities it’s seen and weak easy to “bully” perhaps or maybe im just deranged. Do feminist have to start treat you like men do? Since the lack of respect of VERY apparent internet wide.
omg i love your username!!!!!!!
anyways lmao im not actually too worried about changing a transphobe's mind, hence why sometimes my "argument" is literally just trolling because i think it's funny lol but if you think the only people i debate are radfems and never transphobic men you haven't dug deep enough in my blog. it's mostly terfs because theres an epidemic of them in this hellsite but i just hate transphobes in general lolll
also it's funny how you phrased it as though women are capable of no harm and it's only the men committing hate crimes against trans people. i mean obv the statistics show that cis men are far more violent but i assure you they're not the only ones. it ranges from women actually committing hate crimes themselves to transphobic assholes like nikolas ferreira using "the feminists are on my side!" as an argument for why it's totally acceptable to film a minor in a bathroom as long as she's trans. i mean the first time i experienced transphobia irl it was a grown cis woman telling me i was disgusting, should be ashamed of myself and should stay away from my friends to not "contaminate" them because she found out i was questioning whether i was trans or not when i was 12. so like. instead of lecturing a random trans person online about what you think is the Correct and Unproblematic way of dealing with transphobia, why don't you try to make it so i don't have to deal with it in the first place lmao
tldr as long as im not hurting anyone ill fight transphobia whatever way i think works better since im the one actually getting affected by it <3
14 notes · View notes
esthersshifting · 27 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
heyy!!! i’m a shifter (dur) and i just joined shiftblr so ofc i have to do some kind of intro:)
✧ 𝓜e ᵎᵎ ꣑୧
if you were already my mutual from either tiktok or instagram you probably have known me as esther, but my real name is ella!! i would also prefer to only be called esther unless you’re a few certain people that i’m close with.:) i was originally shifting with the name esther but a few months ago just decided that’d be the name i use for my socials only so no one i know irl finds my acc.. but this is literally tumblr i don’t think anyone i was worried about has tumblr
i’m an infp, and a december sagittarius! and also honestly.. i fear i am the average chronically online teenage girl including the pinterest obsessed part and making everything aesthetic obsessed part:3
my username is esthersshifting on pretty much everything (by everything i mean tiktok, pinterest, instagram, and lemon8)
some things i like areee
i LOVE the twilight saga, they are some of my fav movies (i think twilight and new moon are my favs), and i have the books, but im still on the first!!! i was trying to shift there for a while at some point, but i just one day decided i didn’t really want to anymore and that i was okay with the saga just being some special movies to me (for now……)
i also absolutely love romcoms. they are to die for & they are my favorites. (but i do love those mysterious lookin movies if ykwim)
i am down bad for christmas movies they are the true love of my life, elf is going to forever be my favorite christmas movie idc
i am a music lover TILL I DIE. i love music i love music i love it. i honestly am also not really a hater to many genres like theres some that i just don’t quite fancy enough to have in my playlists but l don’t really hate many songs (there probably is but i can’t be bothered with that)
my all time favorite artist is lana del rey, she’s been my top artist and that’s never changing. i also really like the smiths, defttones(ive only started to really listen to them a few months ago), steve lacy, olivia rodrigo, mazzy star, cigarettes after sex(love those guys), laufey, and omg literally so many more but i think that’d take up this whole intro
some of my variants are
rachel green (friends)
aubrey plaza
rory gilmore (gilmore girls)
andy sachs (the devil wears prada)
leighton meester
✧ 𝓢hifting ᵎᵎ ꣑୧
i have yet to shift, and i’ve been a little wonky w trying to shift recently
but i’ve been shifting since july 2022, i did very loosely find out what it was in 2021 during the hogwarts era, tried once (didn’t even really realize what it ACTUALLY was) then forgot about it and then found it again when stranger things was super popular because of season 4 just coming out and i believe a stranger things shifting video came onto my fyp
my first reality was infact stranger things but i stopped trying to shift there after a few months, and i did recently make a script for a new stranger things dr but then changed my mind that stranger things was not somewhere i wanted to be…... i’ll be dealing w enough monsters in my supernatural dr and the st ones already scare me just from my tv.. so!
i don’t have all that many realities i’m shifting to, but a few of the places i’m shifting to are greys anatomy, my waiting room, supernatural, my 2000s model dr, and gilmore girls!! my main reality is my supernatural one, along with my gilmore girls one! I’m shifting for baby girl jared padalecki in all of my realities i’m trying to shift to, and i’ve added him to them if their my tv show drs (expect for spn, shifting for sam there:3)!!
i’m still trying to figure out everything on here so i might not post a whole ton in the beginning, but i think i’ll be posting here eventually🫶
6 notes · View notes
kittycowboy · 9 months ago
Text
Im worried that ive gone so long without irl friends that I dont know how to actually make them anymore. The last friends I made irl were in kindergarden and first grade, and I kept them until my sophmore year of hs. Ig I made others but we always fell out of contact within a few months. Im always too formal or too casual with them. I cant gauge how theyll teact until after I do and then its just. ugh. It feels like I have to put on a show its so fucking annoying.
I hate it. I did so well with my friends until last year. I kinda resent them for abandoning me. They got closer with ppl in the theater department. Ugh.
Its been. Two years now without actual friends irl to talk to. I hung out with one person but realized I kinda hate being around her so I stopped. I think im unapproachable. I try to be really nice but ig it doesnt rlly matter if theres no one talking to me to be nice to. ugh. Whatever. Whatever.
Its annoying being reminded of it. When I get bored in weekends I just sit and scroll on my phone. I cant go to the mall or see a movie with friends. Because I dont have any. When I make too many cookies I have to eat them all or throw them oit because I dont have friends to give them to. My mom asked if I had any friends that might enjoy some extras we had the other day. What am I supposed to fucking say. No I dont. I dont have anyone irl I can do anything with or give anything to so stop asking. ugh.
I love my family and im really lucky to have such great parents but it sucks having to do everything alone or with them. I want to see the ghibli fest with my friends not with my mom. A new cat cafe opened near me and you have to have someone above 18 with you if ur a minor. Im young for a senior since my birthday is in July so a lot of ppl around me are 18. But the only ones I know are my parents. I want to go to the mall or walk around this market street near me. Its boring to go alone and I dont want my parents there either. So I dont go.
Im running out of things to do. The bookstore is way too expensive compared to online. 20$ more in person isnt worth it. The library is nice but I cant do much there. Ive read all the things that interest me. Its so annoying going to a cafe just to sit on my phone. The money isnt really worth it.
Whatever. whatever
7 notes · View notes