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#i wish i could just be like lmao whatever fuck everyone
bunnihearted · 4 months
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god the knowing that nobody truly loves me or wants me around is so painful like i just wanna die im all alone in this world and how are u even supposed to live when you're unloved and unwanted by everyone
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kavehater · 2 months
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Chappel Roan saying she’s sad she’s demisexual and then there’s me being aroace as a whole like don’t you think I’m even more sad 😭
#not saying she’s not allowed to feel sad at all#just makes me think about myself LOL#I hate being aroace it’s like everyone’s part of a secret club I will never be a part of#and that people don’t tend to understand and if they do they never uphold that fact#like I actually have thrown up before from the concept of being in a relationship because it’s horrifying#and disgusting to me in a practical sense#like I don’t want to throw up every time I start thinking about those things I just want to be normal#and not panic like a relationship sounds like even worse than a death sentence#ppl think aroace is cute and problem free but it’s literally so uncomfortable and inconvenient when you’re in a world which a) doesn’t#understand wth aroace is b) doesn’t respect it at all c) has shit povs on what friendship is and how it can be more fulfilling than somethin#and d) how badly it impacts some ;-; like ik it sounds easy but try telling yourself omg I want to have a forever bestie#but then said forever bestie will never end up truly putting you first because they’d have a partner who will be their number one#and as usual you won’t even be second place you will be last like always#because I’ve noticed that the moment ppl get a partner suddenly they become their forever bestie role and then I can’t have that cause it#freaks me out and disgusts me all at once so I’m literally just cursed with forever feeling lonely and not meaning anywhere near as much to#someone who you wish could even look your way the way you do to them …#honestly by the day these reminders make me feel more and more aplatonic but it’ll simultaneously always feel like a hole in my heart#because apparently being aroace is like being some weird person and some freak#and not in the 𝒻𝓇ℯ𝒶𝓀𝓎 type of connotation LMAO I mean just plain freak#and then that loneliness will always accumulate and accumulate and accumulate until I physically cannot handle it anymore or I take matters#into my own hands and just off with her head to myself LMAO#dora daily#and that is why despite aroace being cool to me it’s just not placed in an environement which makes it cool#as those assholes tend to say oh meh meh meh you never struggled girl … we’re in the 21st century every person in the lgbt community is#living the life dating who they want and being with who they want#but allegedly it is but a crime I can’t like anyone and that nobody fucking listens to me when I say I have an attraction deficit#and that they take it upon their hands to define what I’m attracted to or head canon me as whatever they are#I swear I’m not even fucking worth that shit just leave me alone 😭#I promise like if I was with somebody they will regret the day they were born by being with me LOL I am not all that in fact me being aroace#is saving them from torture ☠️ anyways ! rant over :3
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vibes have NOT improved 3 hours later -_-
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thecherrygod · 4 months
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#my posts#...........................................................................................................................................#............................................................................................................................................#is that enough i think that's enough#yeah that's how its going#everything's been getting worse and I've been feeling very bad but also very pathetic and like complaining almost makes me feel worse but#i can't do anything else about this so like. vent post lmao bc I'm a dumbass#i truly just want to(redacted)but one of those isn't an option and the other i have a drs appointment soon and i don't want to explain that#everything is just. bad. and what isn't i feel like it's getting bad and it's my fault. and I'm probably right.#just. i hate it here#the deserving mentality is truly getting to me and i fucking hate it. it's not logical. I'll still agree with it.#i truly don't deserve the food stuff i can't keep in my life and i deserve the shit that in getting and i can't stop agreeing with that#'oh this classmate wants to have lunch with me on Saturday after working on something! i should cancel before it's too late-#-so i can continue feeling bad for being an apple bc people should hate me bc I'm horrible and don't deserve kindness' like#it's. it's false. it's not logical. and yet#everyone else there's the fucking plexiglass wall and where it wasn't i think it's getting formed and it is my fault probably#i am annoying that one is true#.... I've been making posts like this all day and deleting them bc I'm pathetic also. it's.#... there's a little too much going on lmao#nothing's worth it and i feel like shit and anything i could try to do about it doesn't work and I'm just tired#... in case someone does read this i know it sounds worrying but nothing will happen tbh I'm just a pathetic coward who's sad and tired#and tired of being sad in a way that feels like it's getting worse#I'm not very sure when was the last time i felt. this bad in just. i don't know how to make it stop lmao#also in already annoying so this is all i can do i think lmao#i think I'm seeing now I'm just. being redundant and if i keep this up too much i will delete this. and i should but. i don't think i will#also without saying much this year the one thing™ has been worse than usual and that's not helping either so it truly is just.#that everything is kinda very bad#.... yeah. whatever. it's just.¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯#... i truly wish killing myself was still an option like when i was a teen bit it's not so i just have to deal with whatever this is#... i hate being aware this is all super illogical bc the logical post of my brain teams up making me feel worse somehow.
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verdiesque · 9 months
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Ughhh
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deityofhearts · 7 months
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I think one of my big problems is uncertainly in relationships, I’ve always started to like panic and get in my head every time I’m in a relationship where I’m not sure or my place or if I’m even liked or wanted
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kuiinncedes · 2 years
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who is me sending a bunch of texts in rapid succession without thinking about them tooooo too much
#who even is sheee lol#no but its like if i send them fast enough i can't sit here and overthink them forever go go go#bruh also i accidentlaly renamed an imessage group im in for a class group presentation#bc i didn't realize it would just rename it if you didnt click done or whatever and then i exited and it said i renamed the chat and then#removed the name lmfao 😭 so then i rerenamed it#what would it be like to not think circles about everything i sayyyyyy/dooooooo 🤩#im trying to be less like that lmfao bc all these ppl im around on board and stuff are always just like saying shit and confident and stuff#and i'm just like WATCHING LEARNING TRYING AT LEAST XD#we had a board meeting this morning at fucking 9 am bc somehow out of the several days on the when2meet#this saturday at 9am was the ONLY time everyone was available XD#and it was 32 fucking degrees this morning lmfao i still dont have my winter coat here bc apparently i dont know how to live in michigan#and it's probably gonna get very colder soon so fun :D#BUT BOARD MEETING WAS RLY FUN <333#oh also it was so funny that the discord board channel was just everyone complainign about getting out of bed bc COLD lolllll#also i ran into a couple glowstick club alumni while i was getting takeout w my friend#and it was nice to talk to them hehehe i miss them they were great <3#wish i wasn't so FUCKING AWKWARD last year so i could maybe have gotten to know them more and used my time with them better lmao#im still fucking awkward but last year was even worse lmao 🤪#but no but one of them was like jeanne i dont think ive ever seen you without a mask i didnt recognize you for a second#(which was kinda funny bc i was planning on taking my mask but then i forgot when we left and i was like ehhh it's ok ill be inside for#like half a second lol and i was but anyway) and she was literally like you're beautiful and i was like ??????!!!!!!!!!???? naurrrrrr 😭😭😭#literally UR so beautiful and ive always thought that hand in marriage wtf afjngakdljfhgfsjgk 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#u cant just say that idk how to respond lmfao 😭😭😭😭😭😭#jeanne talks#lemme get back to this fucking research for a presentation that ive been trying to do all day and doing very very slowlyyyy XD
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reiderwriter · 1 year
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Smutty part two of the hand to hand combat fic plz
A/N: Your wish is my command! I think a lot of people were frustrated at where I left the first part off lol, so here's a special treat for everyone who lowkey hated me after that lmao. Enjoy! 18+ MINORS DNI Also it is a crime that there aren't more gifs of Spencer wet, I have used most of them ㅠㅠ
You can read the first part here!
Warnings: shower sex, fingering, suggestive washing idk, Intercrural sex (he fucks the gap between her thighs for a while), no contraception, PinV sex, slight cum play? I guess?
You can also find my masterlist here, and if you enjoy my 18+ works, I'm partaking in kinktober, and you can find out about all of my plans here :]
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As you washed off the day's sweat, standing in the shower rooms of the FBI gym, you cursed the gods above for making you such a coward. 
If you'd been bolder during your sparring session with Spencer, you could've ended the day in a much more pleasurable way, or you'd at least have the memory of whatever you'd do to aid your fantasies. You thought back to your humbling defeats of earlier that day. You really thought you could get the upper hand on Reid in at least one of your rounds, but no. He’d got the jump on you all three times, leaving you squirming under his touch on the mat as he enjoyed his defeats. 
The second-round had been close, having the initial upper-hand being in the assailant role, but he’d used his extra height to throw you off balance, pinning you to the ground from behind, his hands trapping yours against your lower back. You’d blushed at the compromising position, your ass raised suggestively, his bodyweight pushed on top of yours, crotch to your centre, as you tried stay calm despite the very thin materials of both of your work out gears that separated you. 
Not that you were complaining about the extra contact, but you weren’t beneath using it as an excuse for your loss. In your final round, he’d let you think you hand the upper hand for a second, teasing you about enjoying the view from your place above him, straddling his waist as you pinned him down. By that point, you were beyond horny, reaching near orgasmic levers of desperation to feel him push up into you, and he’d let you enjoy the feeling of your core grinding into him for a few minutes. Just long enough that no one else would notice that your movements weren’t simply struggles to keep him pinned. Then, he’d gone and ruined it by thrusting his hips up quickly and using the momentum and your shock to buck you off to the side, returning you to your earlier pinned pose. Despite the losses, you couldn’t really find much else to complain about other than the fact that you hadn’t kissed him right then and there, having not thrown caution to the wind. 
With each pulse of water from the shower head, you tried to clear your head, but he'd consumed your thoughts. You didn't think you wanted him this badly, but apparently one touch was all it took for you to become aware of the desire you had for him. You let your own hands trail between your legs as you decided to deal with your bodies pent up frustrations.
The door to the bathroom opened, though, just when you were about to get going and you had to pull your hand away as you called out to your new friend. 
"Pen? That you? God I'm so fucking sweaty from that work out." You laughed a little as you greeted her, but the other person didn't make any other noises, stopping dead in their tracks. 
"Y/N?" Somehow your blood ran cold as your body heated up. 
"Spencer? What are you…?" You whipped your head around to get a look at him over the glass shower stall door, pulling your hands over your chest, reflexively. 
"Morgan said the men's showers were broken, and he was heading home to shower. But I can't sit for that long on the subway without getting rid of all this sweat. He said there'd be no one else in here since we stayed so late…. I can… I can leave if you need me to?" 
"No! No, it's okay, it's not like we're using the same shower or anything, and I don't want you to feel so… Uncomfortable." 
He thanked you, then slipped into a stall a three away from your own, as you tried your best not to watch the flex of his arms as he firmly gripped his towel around himself. 
Turning back to your own shower, you decided you needed to speed it up, actually get on with it so you could escape this awkward, tempting situation. You were almost sure this was some kind of divine punishment. You lathered up your hair and began to massage your head when the water suddenly ran so cold it burned. 
"Ah, shit," you whimpered out as you ran from the water as quickly as possible. 
"Um, Spencer?" 
"Y-Yeah," he responded, having heard your moans and immediately perked his head up. 
"Your shower stall, it's the second from the door right?" 
"Yeah, why?" 
"Shit, I should've mentioned something," you ran a hand through your hair as you turned off your shower. "That one doesn't work too well, when you use hot water in that one for some reason, it makes the rest of these showers run cold for the rest of the day." 
"Oh, I'm sorry Y/N, I didn't realise." 
"No, it's good, I guess it's just cold shower time for me now." You sighed in a huff of annoyance, and turned your shower back on. 
"Do you… Do you want to come and use this one? My water's still hot and the cold water really won't be good for relaxing your muscles after all that work." 
"With you?" Your eyes meet his over the walls of your shower stall and you try not to sound too eager. Maybe this could be your chance after being such an idiot earlier. 
"Yeah, I guess. I still need to, you know, wash up?" 
You nodded at him then, and began collecting your things, your towels in your hands covering your sensitive areas, but only just as you stepped into his space.
He pressed himself against one of the walls as you entered, doing his best to cover his cock with his hands, but failing pretty miserably. You shot a single look down there, hoping he didn't notice. He was hard, and God did you want to help him out. 
But unsure of how to broach the topic, you ignored it and put your things down, before turning in to face the shower. A little sign of contentment fell over you as you felt the heat against your skin again, body relaxing as you began washing off your hair once again. 
You felt him move until he was a shadow at your back, close enough that you could feel his breath on your skin. 
"Y/N, let me help you clean your back. I don't want you to flare up that arm injury, and you're not reaching that well." 
"What?" Ill advisedly, you turn to face him. His eyes trail over your body, landing on the swell of your chest as you stand only millimeters from touching. Gently dragging his eyes back up, he repeats his plea, and turns you around, grabbing your body wash.
"Trust me, I'll help." But you know this isn't going to do any good easing the tension in your body, his hands on you being as distracting as they were. You almost jusmo a little when his bare hands finally come down on your waist. 
"S-Spencer I have a loofah!" You almost moan out as he begins to rub circles into your skin with his fingers spread. He's closer now, and with his hands out of the way. You can feel his cock, bare against your ass, twitching as you realise he's getting a lot of pleasure out of this. 
"Do you know how much bacteria can live on one of those things? You wanted to get clean, right?" It's all you can do not to buck back into him as he releases the words, hands coming up to your shoulders as he works his strength into your skin. His hands feel so good against you, that you barely notice them slipping around your front, as he begins to work on the plains of your stomach as well.
You throw your head back against his chest in pleasure as he slips higher and higher, hands eventually cupping your breasts as he slowly lathers them up, taking his time to feel every single inch of your skin. You whimper in your pleasure, and you hear his heavy breathing similarly pick up. 
"Spencer…" You don't know what your words are asking, begging for, but it's clear he does, as his hands spread. One goes up to your neck, wrapping around you tightly as you gasp out a breath, the other washing hanging in the air as he rids it of soap before trailing down between your legs. 
His fingers find your clit and you whimper. 
"That's it baby, I'm just gonna help you get clean, okay? Gonna make you feel good, too." You nod at his words, giving him the silent confirmation he needs to press his cock in between your thighs and start rubbing it up against you, not yet pushing it in. You're pushing your ass back into him now as he starts to fuck the folds of your sweet cunt, writhing in pleasure everytime his tip catches on your hole, pleasure rolling off your tongue in waves. 
His hand on your neck keeps you from gaining volume, keeping you grounded as he gets you close to that euphoric bliss. You're desperate to actually feel him inside you though, squirming in the hopes that one of his thrusts will accidentally land on target. 
"Spencer, please…" You know what you want now, and you're desperate for him to listen, as you turn your head to the side, grabbing the back of his own as you pull him down for a sloppy kiss. His hips still as he falls into the kiss, tongue dragging over your lips and begging for entrance. His hand stays on your clit though, and within a few more rubs you feel yourself twitch in his arms, fully held up by his hand on your neck. 
"Spencer, please, need you…" 
"Are you sure, Y/N? This is still a public bathroom, and I don't want you to think you have to do anything just bec-" You cut him off with another kiss, and that's all he needs before he's pressing you back into the shower stall, wrapping your legs around his hips and pushing his cock inside of you. 
You pulled his lips down to yours again and again, desperate to taste him, shower abandoned behind you. His pace picked up and soon he was slamming into you, with the full force of his body, the weight that had earlier been used to pin you down now being used to pleasure you to the fullest. 
He pressed his forehead against yours, letting his eyes fall to the place where your two bodies met, his grunts filling the space as you tried your best to bite your tongue. You knew that if you let yourself be as loud as you could've been in that moment, someone would definitely notice. 
"Just like that, Spencer, fuck, just like that." Your hips bucked wildly against his as he pulled your other leg up and around him, holding you fully off the ground as he continued his movements. 
You gripped his back, letting your nails find any purchase they could, dragging scratches down his skin, marking him as yours. You didn't feel so bad about the pain you must've been dealing him though, not when his hands were leaving red handprints on your hips from his tight grip, the sharp discomfort only fuelling your passion. 
"Spence, I'm… Fuck I'm close." Your head slumped into his neck. 
"Cum for my, Y/N, need to feel you clench around my cock." He grunted, and somehow your body listened to his demands perfectly, spilling over the edge with his next thrust. 
He moaned out quickly, lowering your legs to the floor, still holding you up, as he pulled out and stroked his cock a few more times. His white release painted both of your stomachs with his climax, and you fell against each other in your bliss, trying to both gain back your normal heart rate and calm your breath. 
"Spencer, I think we need to get back in the shower," you smiled up at him, and dragged him back over to it as he flushed, not finding the words needed to apologise for his mess. 
You pulled him in for a kiss under the water and mentally thanked Morgan for putting you through hell that day. He pulled away from you to attempt to talk, but you didn't want to let him. 
"You know," he started, but you tried to shut him up again, wanting desperately to feel his lips right back on yours. 
"Y/N, please," he laughed pulling your head away from him as you whined out childishly. 
"You know, Morgan was lying about us needing to do this physical thing." Your eyes bulged at the confession, as you tried to stammer out a reply. 
"What? I… What?" 
"He pulled the same act a year or so ago, too. Y/N, Penelope is never in the field, she doesn't have to do physical training, and we both have enough case hours to cover any further requirements." 
"So he… ThatThat son of a bitch." You muttered angrily to yourself as he ran a hand through your still damp hair, smiling down on you peacefully. 
"Wait, Spencer… If you knew that he was making this whole thing up, why did you go along with it?" 
"Needed an excuse." He pulled you in for another kiss, this one slow and languid, as you felt him twitch to life again at your thigh. 
"An excuse for what?" You moaned out as his lips trailed down your neck, leaving behind a trail of love bites you were sure would bloom into purple bruises, just another decoration for your neck alongside his handprint. 
"An excuse to touch you. You're very good at following professional boundaries, you know?" You laughed at him once more and let him pull you close into him again. It took you an extra hour to shower that day, but it was worth every second. 
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ghost-proofbaby · 11 months
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my little scaredy cat
request: [anon] i would love to see watching horror movies with best friend!eddie and reader instinctively grabs his arm and hides herself against him and it leads to feelings and confessions haha
warnings: none! except it's unedited, which would be scary if that wasn't 90% of my writing on here lmao
pairing: eddie x fem!reader
wc: 3.1k+
i had a lot of fun busting this one out. it's just so cute and certainly how i wish i was spending my halloween! also, rest assured, i am also eyeing the other request you submitting anon. <3 happy haunting, my friends.
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This was such a stupid idea. Such a stupid, stupid idea. 
You’ve always been a scaredy cat. Everyone in your friend group was well aware of it – you loved the idea of Halloween, but your poor heart just couldn’t take most of the frights that came with the eccentric holiday. 
It was fine, most of the time. If anyone had the urge to plan out a day at a pumpkin patch, you were eagerly accepting the invitation. If anyone wanted to bake any sort of sweet treats laced with pumpkin spice or caramel apple flavor profiles, you were already in your car and armed with the perfect recipe to help them. Someone wanted to peruse the decoration aisles of various stores? Wait no more, the perfect shopping buddy could be found in you. You, who could handle most of the trivial and sweet aspects of the holiday. You, who divulged in the more aesthetic side of it all rather than the scary side of it. 
Your distaste of being jumpscared or unnerved by gore and ghouls alike only really caused issues when it came to your best friend, Eddie Munson. 
His taste in experience of the frightful time of year was entirely the opposite of yours. It’s not that he didn’t like decorating caramel apples with you or that he didn’t find your choice in decorations cute, because he did. But he liked the terrifying aspect of it all – he liked the adrenaline rush of fictional danger. 
And friendship, in all its glory, is about give and take, is it not? 
Compromise. That’s what he called it when he’d begged and pleaded for you to join him in a movie night. Because the moment the suggestion fell from his lips, you both knew he had no intentions of watching one of your usual festive movies that only teased about the creatures that crept through the night. PG-13 films that didn’t really do it for him. No, Eddie Munson had insisted you join him for a movie night, and you both knew exactly what kind of movie he intended to play. 
You just hadn’t anticipated the scariest fucking movie you’d ever endured for the boy beside you on the couch. 
“Shit!” 
Your squeak is muffled over by the crescendo of creepy instrumental echoing from the small TV across the room. A cycle had quickly been found during this movie night; the movie would fall eerily silent as a tense scene arrived, you’d tense every single muscle so hard that Eddie could feel you shaking from the other side of the couch, and then once the jumpscare occurred and your small squeals were let out involuntarily, his own laughter would follow. 
“Oh, come on,” he coos a little, leaning closer to the middle of the couch, still a fair distance away from your figure bundled up in blankets that were being used more as shields than anything at this point, “That one wasn’t even that bad!” 
“To you!” you snap, yanking the fabric back down from your eyes only to glare at Eddie rather than look at whatever grotesque was plaguing the screen, “I’m a scaredy cat, remember?” 
And oh, remember he does. In all your years of friendship, Eddie had called you that nickname more times than either of you could count. He never meant it with ill will, but it was easier to tease you than to admit just how adorable he found your small reactions. 
Easier to tease than to admit just how badly he wishes you would seek protection or refuge from him during the scares he put you through. 
His face falls slightly, but he doesn’t let his small grin slip up, not wanting to give himself or his twinge of guilt away, “I’m sorry, kitty cat. C’mere – I can protect you from all the big bad monsters-”
Eddie’s opened arms are only met with one of the pillows you’d stolen off his bed to make the couch more comfortable. It smacks into the center of his chest with deadly aim and ferocious power, making him let out an exaggerated oomph. 
“Fuck you,” you grumble, adjusting the blanket around your shoulders now that the scare had passed. You almost tack on a comment about how he’s lucky you like him, because you would never endure this for anyone else.
Robin had tried. Steve had tried. Nancy had tried. They’d all tried to entice you in the scarier, classic Halloween experiences to no avail. Every offer of going to a haunted house, or attending the premiere of the newest horror movies at the local theater, were shot down before they even finished their sentences. 
Only one person could break your staunch demeanor on your limits. And right now, you sort of hated his guts. 
Eddie softens a bit, watching the way you pout and curl into yourself just a little tighter.
“Sweetheart,” he finally drops the cool guy demeanor, his voice gentle as he leans over with genuine concern, “We can turn it off, if you really want. Hell, if you want me to, I’ll put on something in your taste. Little Shop of Horrors, or maybe Beetlejuice? Those don’t usually scare you.” 
The offer is enticing. But you have a point to prove. 
“No,” you sit up a little straighter, square your shoulders with a little more defiance and faux bravery, “No, you wanted to watch…” 
You pause, and Eddie smiles softly as he supplies the title of his film of choice, “Poltergeist.” 
“Right, yes, Poltergeist. You wanted to watch it, so we’re gonna watch it.” 
Your stubbornness is admirable. 
Even when it falters. Even when another jumpscare has you ever so slightly scooching towards the center of the couch, no longer pressed to the opposite arm from Eddie in defiance. Even when Eddie spreads his legs casually, and you bump your knee into his thigh, the slightest touch bringing immense comfort.  
Once you discover that, it all seems downhill from there. 
A press of a knee against the side of his thigh turns into your side brushing his. Suddenly, the blanket you’d wielded like a weapon becomes shared. Moments where you try to hold up a barrier between your eyes and the screen cause slight disturbances in Eddie’s own vision. And then, it happens.
The thing he’d been diabolically planning for years. The one scenario he’d dreamt of every Halloween season, the one intention he’d held secretly every time he’d put your through endless scares. 
The one touch that could send him into cardiac arrest. 
He almost missed it, it happens so suddenly. One moment, you’re just curling up a little bit closer to him. The next, your arms fully wiggly their way around his bicep, capturing his arm in your grasp as your face buries into his shoulder. He can no longer smell the buttery popcorn or faint chocolate on his breath as you invade his space. It’s all sweet shampoo and subtle perfume that tickles his nose, skin against skin in a quick flush as he can hear the vibrations of your predictable scream against the fabric of his shirt. 
You hardly seem to notice the sudden entanglement of your bodies in all your fear — your knees practically in his lap and your torso clinging onto his forearm for dear life. You’re acting on instinct, seeking out humane comfort without considering what you were doing.
When you do notice, you don’t let go, only slacken your grip. 
“Oh, I-“ you stutter, pulling back slightly to look up at a stunned Eddie, “I’m sorry, that’s- I just- I was scared and-“ 
“It’s fine,” he cuts you off, eyes blown wide, “It’s… it’s fine.” 
It’s more than fine.
His heart races in a way no horror movie or haunted house could incite. Every nerve ending tingles, everywhere his body connects to yours burning in delicious warmth. He wants to spend an eternity like this — you, curled up to him, clinging to him like your holy savior. 
Years, and years, and years of wait pays off. Patience is surely virtue as those big eyes of yours look into his. 
After a couple awkward beats of silence, you whisper, “I don’t think I like Poltergeist.” 
Just like that, you have him laughing again. It’s slow and steady, a gentle chuckle that stirs from his chest in disbelief as he tries to thaw from his shock and yearning.
“You think?” he breathes out, tone not nearly teasing enough to cover up the shakiness. 
He swears he can feel your heart pounding against his shoulder. 
“Don’t be mean,” you start to scowl, slowly unfurling. But he stops you — angles his arm so you can’t slip your arms away as easily as before, tilting his head in closer.
“Mean? I could never be mean to you, my little scaredy cat.” 
“You’re literally being mean as we speak-“
And so, he decides to stop speaking. 
It’s impulsive and an even dumber idea than you enduring such a scary movie to be around him. But you look so fucking cute, his heart is tearing up his throat, and suddenly his lips are on yours in his largest spurt of bravery to date. Even more brave than the time he’d made himself a human shield between you and that dude with a chainsaw at the local haunted house, despite the way chainsaws actually kind of made him shit himself.
You don’t fully reciprocate at first. His lips are pressed hard against yours, tips of noses crushed and eyes fluttered shut, and he starts to believe he’s made a mistake. A terrible, terrible mistake that just washed years of friendship down the drain. 
Until your hands tighten on his bicep. Until that soft squeeze comes, and it feels like he can breathe again despite sharing the air with you. 
He breaks away for just a second, “I-“
“Don’t be mean,” you repeat your earlier words with entirely new meaning now. He opens his eyes and finds yours already pleading up at his face, glossy and desperate, movie forgotten. 
Those hands once squeezing his bicep let go and move to the collar of his t-shirt. Normally, he’d make a comment about you stretching it out, deforming the perfect fit that took him ages to wear in, but he can’t be bothered to feel anything but delight when you’re tugging him back in for another kiss. 
And the last thing he wants to be is mean. So he kisses you kindly, kisses you with all the care in the world that he had buried beneath his skin since the day he met you. Kisses you like it could scare away all the monsters that wait in the shadows. Like he’d lay down his life to protect you from the very frights he’d been subjecting you to for far too long now. 
“Hey,” he mumbles, pulling back briefly, “Hey.”
This time, his forehead doesn’t leave yours as he pauses the kisses. 
“God, Munson, I’ve waited for this God knows how long, sat through so many fucking scary movies, and you’re really going to-“ 
“Hold on, what?”
He’s grinning so hard, it aches. In his cheeks, in his chest, in the back of his head. Your words sink in and he relishes each syllable, even in your frustration.
“I- Uh,” you pull back suddenly, fingers still loosely tangled in his t-shirt, “I-“
“Enlighten me, sweetheart,” he insists, eyes finally fluttering back open to catch the embarrassment painted plainly across your face. You wear a nearly painful expression that only tightens as you know he’s watching you, “Just how many scary movies have you sat through wanting me to kiss you?” 
“Fuck off,” you sigh out, shaking your head a little, “I mean it. Fuck right off-“
“Cause I could probably give a ballpark number for how many times I’ve wanted to kiss you during them,” he continues on quickly, “Actually, I bet I could count how many times I suggested watching these fuckin’ films just for this moment only to chicken out.” 
Your eyes are open again in an instant. Sparkling with hope and realization of what he was getting at. “Excuse me?”
“Do you really think I’m that mean?” he scoffs, finally reaching up for your hands, surprisingly calm despite the delightful storm wreaking havoc in his chest. He takes your knuckles in his and lets his thumb trail right over them, “No offense, but if I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t have-“
“You like me?” 
Your voice is sweet as honey, bright and drowning out the horror movie still playing. 
He smiles, boyish glint and all, as he confirms, “I like you.” 
You put the first real amount of distance between the two of you since you’d started to cling to him out of fear, almost as if signaling that bravery beginning to bubble over in your chest, “You actually like me?”
“Yes. Is that so hard to believe?”
“No, I- Well, maybe,” you bite your lip, and he’s suddenly dizzy with the need to capture it between his own teeth, “I just… I always thought you might like someone a little braver.”
His nose wrinkles, hands still twisting yours in his, “Excuse me? I think you’re plenty brave.” 
“Eddie, you’ve said it yourself, I’m a goddamn scaredy cat.”
“So?”
“So,” you persist, shuffling so that your legs fold beneath you and you gain some leverage over him, “You’re the exact opposite. You love scary things. Not even just during Halloween, but year round. And you’re telling me you like me even though I’m a scaredy cat.” 
“I like you because you’re a scaredy cat, thank you very much,” he corrects you immediately, “I love the way you always need me to protect you. I know, I know — not very feminist of me. I’m sorry. It’s just- it’s really fuckin’ cute, y’know?” now that his floodgates have opened, he’s pouring out all the words he’s held back for so long, “And besides, you’re more than just a scaredy cat. You’re also so smart, so beautiful, so funny. Yeah, you scare easily, but you’re also the same person who is the first to put me in my place when I’m being an absolute little shit. And don’t even get me started on all the cute faces you make when you’re talking about things you actually like, or when you’ve been baking with Nance and have flour all over your cheeks-“ 
“Okay, okay,” you stop his rambling before he can embarrass you any further. Any more affection, and your face might end up buried in his shoulder again, “I get it. You like me.” 
It’s quiet for a few moments. The two of you only stare, both smiling stupid, the screams of whatever climax occurring in the movie not even reaching your ears. All you can hear is the echo of his words, of his admission. And all he can hear is the pretty way your breath catches when he gives a small squeeze to your palm. 
It’s nice. It should be more anxiety inducing, it should be more dramatic. Eddie Munson should be absolutely losing his mind right now because he just kissed his best friend he’s been in love with for ages, but he isn’t. Actually, for the first time in a while, it feels as though he’s finally found it — he’s found his mind, he’s found his peace as he’s staring at your shy expression. It just feels right. Like a sigh of relief from the Universe. 
“I like you, too,” you break the silence, unable to meet his gaze, “I mean, you probably already got that, but-“
“Say it again.”
“Huh?”
“I did gather that, but my God, please say it again.” 
Your eyes meet him, and another piece clicks into place. 
Right. It’s so fucking right.
“I like you,” you repeat yourself, a smile beginning to dance on your lips. He can’t help himself — he leans forward and pecks the corner of your upturned mouth, “I like you,” the repetition is music to his ears as he plants a second kiss on your cheek, “I like you, Munson.” 
His peppered kisses mark every inch of skin available to him, making giggles begin to escape you. You even try to hide from his onslaught, but it’s no use. He’s quick to drop your hands and wrap his arms around you, tugging you in close and trapping you against him as each kiss grows more obnoxious. Loud smacking sounds, deliberately leaving spit behind that has you squealing. It’s nothing like the squeaks from when you were watching the movie; these small noises are filled with a little more joy, a little more happiness that only fuels Eddie.
“Eddie!” you try to scold, placing two hands on his solid chest, “Oh my God, stop it. You’re gross.” 
“You love it,” he mutters with his mouth fully pressed to your temple, nose buried in your hair. That sweet, sweet shampoo intoxicating him.
You like him. He didn’t fuck it up. 
You finally go slack in his touch, succumbing and letting him place you in his lap, curled up comfortably as you sigh, “Yeah. Okay, maybe I do. Whatever.” 
“Oh, don’t act all tough now, kitty cat.” 
Your hands are curled back in the fabric against his chest and you share the wonderful ache he had been feeling in his own cheeks and bones as you look down at him with playfully squinted eyes.
When he ducks down for another kiss, you stop him easily, “Nope. First, I have a request.” 
“Anything.”
“Anything?”
“Anything. Name it, and it’s yours.” 
“Please turn off that goddamn movie.” 
He throws his head back in laughter that shoots straight for your heart. The kind of laughter that haunts a chilled autumn night as children prance the streets for candy, as teenagers get into mischief in distant bonfire parties, as elderly couples enjoy morning coffees over eerie fog. 
It kind of feels like home. It kind of feels like everything is as it should be, finally. 
“I suppose I can do that for you, my little scaredy cat,” he muses as his head tilts back forward, chest swelling with affection, “Besides, I think I know something we can do that’s a little more fun than watching the Poltergeist.” 
“Oh, yeah? And what would that be?”
His arms tighten around you as he suddenly throws the two of you to lay down on the couch, his body hovering over yours and pick necklace nipping at your chin while he reaches out to click off the TV. The weight of him between your hips feels even better than either of your wildest dreams.
Years. You couldn’t believe it had taken years for this, and neither could he. But patience is virtue, and he probably would have waited another thousand years for this feeling, truth be told. 
“This,” he says boldly once the TV buzzes in sudden silence, dipping down and continuing where the two of you left off. Two sets of lips fit together like the world’s easiest jigsaw puzzle.
It’s safe to say the rest of the night, any further squeaks and squeals you let out aren’t due to ghosts.
eddie's taglist: @capricornrisingsstuff @thisisktrying @hideoutside @vol2eddie @corrcdedcoffin @ches-86 @alovesongtheywrote @its-not-rain @feralchaospixie @cheesypuffkins87 @thebook-hobbit @babez-a-licious @eddies-acousticguitar @gagasbee @d64d-n0t-sl66p1ng @aysheashea @kellsck @cosmorant @billyhvrgrove-main @micheledawn1975 @eddiesxangel @siriuslysmoking @witchwolflea @tlclick73 @magicalchocolatecheesecake @mizzfizz @nanaminswhore @mikiepeach @ali-r3n
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m1ssunderstanding · 7 months
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Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 2.2
Prettyyyyy
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Maybe John's not actually crazy for thinking Hey Jude is to him? “For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool by making his world a little colder.” fool is, in my tin hat world, often a code name for Paul in their songs. And that description is certainly him to a t actually. I wonder why I've never considered it before. 
John: are you happy here, honey? Paul: I ain't happy here my honey, can you take me back? How many songs does Paul write from 1968 on about trying to go back? One day I'm going to make a list and it'll be a long one. 
And thus begins the phase of they just can't help it, can they? But they really wish they could. They make each other so so happy, but they really wish they didn't. It would hurt less that way. 
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I love the comparison of Linda's pictures of everyone else and then of John. It just shows that it's not a her problem – that's such a lovely one of George, who Hates Yoko – it's how he feels about her.
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John, coming up with every possible weapon to provoke Paul, finally has Yoko sing Paul's part in one of their songs. It really is such a slap in the face. But of course breaking the sanctity of their music is what does it best. And still, all he gets out of him is a look before he walks away. Whatever it is that John wants, I think Paul literally can not give it to him. 
Btw the white album is my favorite, probably. There's just such incredible diversity on it. It's so much fun, you never get tired of it, and it's an excellent display of their genius and versatility. 
He looks like an abandoned puppy. 
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What do we think? John says Paul drummed on WDWDITR. Paul says Ringo did. Who is telling the truth?
“It was getting to be where he wanted to do it like that but he couldn't make the break . . .” So John thinks Paul doing his songs by himself means he wants to break the group up? I personally read it as him not wanting to annoy everyone with his bossiness, but that's just my take. 
John talking about how it's him and Yoko now, but before, it was . . .
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George needs to send them a cease and desist notice or he'll sue them for breech of character the amount of times they drag him into things he's not a part of. Especially if they're not going to even fucking spare him a glance in reality. Please and thank you, Hare Krishna. 
Paul's epigraph on the two virgins cover. “Battles to prove he was a saint”? What kind of passive aggressive shit is that, Paul?
The eternal question: what happened in India? And does John really not know? Or is he just unwilling to tell what happened to rolling stone?
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Somebody please engage with that poor little boy, preferably, you know, his father. Ugh, Cynthia must've had so much anxiety watching that footage, or really any time Julian was with John. And that footage is placed in the doc right after a pic of Paul already being Heather's dad just so naturally. 
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But hell, if I've ever seen attention-seeking behavior, this is it. Singing about wanting to die while seductively undressing the closest thing Paul would've had to career competition at the time. 
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I'm sorry but it will forever be hilarious to me that when John's singing his part of “I've Got a Feeling” with Yoko it's “soft dream” and then with Paul it's “wet dream”. How John and Yoko tricked everyone into believing they were too horny for each other to control themselves is beyond my imagination. 
On the day John plays their sex tape, “Unusually, Yoko is not present.” LMAO girl same. John: I'm going to play our sex tape for the band tomorrow. Yoko: oh was that tomorrow? Damn, I forgot, I have a thing. 
“Well that's an interesting one.” What did John honestly expect, though? Like I know he wanted Paul to be like, “that's it! Enough is enough I'm taking you home and doing you right!” Or whatever. But what did he honestly, realistically expect?
Always saying the same things at the same time, always on the same page, same word. About everything, it seems, except their relationship. 
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Paul: but you won't say anything about it. John: I said what I've been thinking. Paul: Are you still thinking that now? What are you thinking now? John: I'm still thinking about it. Infuriating. Whatever it is John's been thinking, he doesn't want to talk about it in front of cameras. Is it quitting the band? I think it's something more complicated than that but I've no idea what. 
“John, John, joooooohn!” X “Martha my Dear” crossover my beloved. The fact that literally Everyone reacts and tries to get her to stop except Paul is so extremely telling. Yoko: joooooohn! Ringo: He's busy! Yoko: joooooohn! John: Stop that! (And he looks and sounds genuinely pissed) Yoko: joooooohn! Paul: (plinking and pounding away, definitely not thinking thoughts about what he would do right now if he was a girl that will come out of his mouth fifteen years later)
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Everyone's trying to figure out the problem with George vs JohnandYoko and Paul's saying “and like with Yoko, they’re real. They mean it.” Linda laughs. “I don't dig that.” You don't, Linda? What about them isn't real to her, I wonder. Does she think they don't really love each other? Or what?
Linda: *Makes fart noise* Go away! Paul: continues to defend them. Neil: everybody cough. See and this is why it sucks that get back was so edited. Because it's important that Paul's defending them here not just going on and on where nobody asked. He knows he's hurt John, and he feels bad enough about it to let him have his mommy with him at all times if that's what he needs.
If what??? Someone needs to force them to finish their damn sentences. Because I feel like he cuts himself off here when (I swear!!) he's about to say what it is that's hurting John so badly.
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Anyway, here's where (imo) he's kinda wrong. Where he says "if it came to a push between Yoko and the band, it's Yoko." I think I said it in my get back posts, but I'll say it again. Yeah, if it was Yoko or the band, it's Yoko. But if it's Yoko or Paul filling all the gaps Yoko is currently filling? It's Paul. You know? And I think that's what John wants so badly at this time, actually. Is “a push between Yoko and [Paul]” ending with Paul stepping up for him in some way that he wasn't before, you know?
He really does get it though. John wanting to be as close as possible with Yoko so he doesn't lose her and their connection. Don't forget he does put Linda in his band. He gets it because it was the same with him and John. 
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I really do think it's a huge myth that they just never talked about feelings or anything serious. Look at them. This is how they talk in a crowded place with their girlfriends sitting right there. They didn't just get through fifteen years of one of the greatest collaborations in history never actually talking. They talked about deep stuff. And frequently. 
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bunnihearted · 6 months
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im the one society marked as avoidant yet im always the only one who wanna fucking talk things thru. y'all are a fkn joke!!! im sry but u rlly are 💀 im the avoidant one. the one scared of conflict nd afraid of talking.... yet im always the one staying and begging to talk while the other one just leaves or is a wall nd refuses to talk abt it 😹😹😹😹😹
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kekeke32 · 6 months
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TOUCHSTARVED trailer theme theory??
Hi guys, hi everyone. Hope we’re doing well!
SO the full version of the trailer theme is finally out on YouTube and holy shit??? It goes so HARD!!! Give it a listen here.
After rewatching it over and over again, I noticed something so I’ll map out which lyrics appear with which character for y’all to see:
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Wish I could’ve added more ss but I’m on the mobile app 🥲 Anyways, I really don’t think the dev team added the characters photos randomly ‘cause check this out:
In Ais’s part, the lyrics are about a certain weakness (ik the lyrics “my weakness” refer to a person but I chose to ignore that jskdksk) and survival. This may be a reach BUT doesn’t this reminds you of Ais’s official character description? Specifically of this part: “Ais seems capable of curing you...but a sick sense of dread surrounds him. He's beginning to suspect that he may not be as in control of his powers as he thought. Can you save each other, or will he drag you down to the abyss with him?" This so-called “weakness” could be his very own powers and he’ll need the player to help him, to “survive”.
Now, about Vere’s part, I don’t have much to say tbh other than the fact that the lyrics “Cause everytime we touch” appear for the first time in his part and I guess you could say it’s related to his frequenting at the brothel? (iykwim 😏) Oh! And you could also see him being touched by a lot of different hands in the trailer. Besides that, his part ends with the lyrics “need you by my side” sung softly by the singer hmm…
Kuras’s part on the other hand, starts strongly (I suck balls at describing music so pls listen 4 urselves, you’ll know what I mean😭) and at 1:59 mins the lyrics are “Cause everytime we touch” then his face darkens a little and it stars an instrumental interlude. I don’t know what that really means but he’s sus
Mhin’s part is sung very softly as well and the lyrics “We’ve been through them all. You make me rise when I fall” are so sweet more so because I think in their route they’ll open up more to the player after going together through incomprehensible horrors and we’ll learn how to support each other <33
Finally, Leander’s part!! Now, LISTEN. His part is the reason why I even made this post in the first place lmao This mf is way too sus but first of all, the building synth progression at 2:58???? oh my god I got CHILLS. literal chills. *ahem* Moving on, his part, starts strongly the same as Kuras’s part did. Their parts are the only ones sung like that… Weird, huh? Anyway, after the lyrics “I can’t let you go. Want you in my life” at 3:49, the song gets SUPER intense and starts sounding very desperate ig?? (kudos to Dan! love his voice frfr) and Leander’s part ends with “Need you by my side”. Okayy y'all… Y'ALL. THIS IS CRAZY. In his part we have both the lyrics "I can't let you go. Want you in my life" AND "I want this to last. Need you by my side". AHHHH Leander you obsessed little bitch (affectionate)
In conclusion, there’s no fucking way the red spring team didn’t assign the certain parts of the lyrics very and I mean VERY purposefully to each LI. The parts suit them specifically well so I highly doubt it’s random but it could also just be me reading too much into this
Whatever!!! Good morning/Good night to this fandom only ^_^
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snowyquokka · 5 months
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HOME
jeongin x fem reader
cw: angst (😈), breakup, kissing, swearing, mutual pining, mentions of cheating, kinda toxic/asshole seungmin (FORGIVE ME), not proof read bc why tf would i do that (im too lazy so my apologies if some of it doesn’t make sense lmfao-)
wc: 3.1k
a.n - so this is not how it was originally supposed to be 😭 it started as a seungmin fic but spiraled into whatever monstrosity this is lmao. everyone thank @solisyeah for the request ily. anywho i hope it’s good <3
❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥
Seungmin furrows his brows as he inspects the photo on his screen. A photo of you with another guy, in his lap with your face nuzzled into the crook of his neck.
Just like you do with Seungmin.
On the very couch he’s sitting on.
At first he thought it was edited, because there’s no way you’d cheat on him, right? But as he took a closer look he just knew it was real.
He was tired, sore, and downright miserable from a rough day at the studio; he had to take way too many breaks for his liking and this picture was just the thing he needed to send him right off the deep end.
He shot up from his spot on the couch so fast it made his head spin, but that didn’t deter him from storming into your bedroom where you were sitting on the bed, aimlessly scrolling through your phone. Once you see his face you can automatically sense something’s wrong.
“Seung?” You tilt your head as you watch him take your apartment key off of his key ring before placing it on your dresser with a clink.
“Seungmin what are you doing?” You jump off of your bed as he slides his shoes on. He runs his fingers through his hair with a frustrated huff.
“I don’t- I think we just need a break. I need a break.” These words were the last thing you imagined to ever come out of his mouth, in this context especially. Or lack there of.
“Wha- why?” Your eyes glaze over with unshed tears that threaten to spill at any given moment. You don’t want to cry in front of him, you’ve always hated having your raw emotions on display like that, especially in such a powerless situation. “Seungmin, talk to me. What the fuck is going on?”
“Don’t play dumb with me. I’m not stupid.” Seungmin shakes his head “Did you really think you could hide it from me?”
“Hide what, Seungmin?”
“You should’ve just fucking left me. Spared my feelings, maybe. But I guess you’re just too selfish for that.”
Without another word he rushes out of the room, leaving you in shambles with nothing else to do but slide to the floor, curl into yourself and let the sobs take over your body.
Seungmin can hear you crying before he even walks out of the front door, causing his heart to clench in his chest and his gut to twist. Standing with his hand just brushing the door handle, he has to physically force himself to press on, to let you go, to accept his reality. The door slams shut behind him and the noise only pushes you further towards the realization that this is actually happening. You aren’t hallucinating, this isn’t some fucked up fever dream or an even more fucked up prank.
You just wish you knew why. No matter how much you try to put the pieces together, you’re always missing something. You can’t think of anything that could’ve set him off. Everything was perfectly normal less than an hour ago, yet all it took was five minutes to trigger the downward spiral of what feels like the end of the world- the end of your world.
-
“What’re you doing back here?” Jeongin slides next to Seungmin - who is still eyeing up the picture on his screen - on the floor. Jeongin nods towards the phone, “What’s that?”
Seungmin huffs and leans his head against the wall behind him, “I honestly don’t fucking know, I don’t even really want to know, actually.”
Jeongin reaches for the phone, pulling it out of Seungmin’s grasp. His lips part in a silent ‘oh’ as he inspects the photo. He’s assuming Seungmin hadn’t even given you a chance to explain solely based on his reaction, in typical Seungmin fashion. Jeongin turns his body to face the other, his face set in an almost disappointed expression.
“I’m going to say this with the utmost respect and I need you to not cause me any bodily harm-” Jeongin sighs before continuing, “You’re a dumbass. Like the dumbest dumbass I think I’ve ever seen. Like paboracha level dumbass. I’m talking-”
“Are you done?” Seungmin groans and squeezes his eyes shut.
“Are you done? God- you just fucked yourself over. If I were you I’d start praying that she’ll still take you back after all this crazy shit.”
“How did I fuck myself over when she’s the one cheating? Or am I supposed to just forget about that and take the blame for it all like usual? She brought another guy into the same place I spend almost all my time at, and probably fucked hi-” Jeongin slaps his hand over Seungmin’s mouth, effectively silencing him before he could carry on with his bullshit.
“Hyung. Shut up.” The maknae slowly pulls his hand away as Seungmin’s eyebrows shoot upward. “Look I get it, you’re tired, you’re upset, you’re angry bu-”
“Can you fucking blame me? I can’t unsee it. I mean, you see how comfortable she looked with him.” he clenches his fists.
“Will you keep your mouth closed already? You’re killing me here, got a massive migraine now.” Jeongin groans and rubs his temples as he speaks “That picture was taken over a year ago. Before you even knew she existed, hyung. Besides, I know her better than anyone ever will, other than you obviously, which is why I suggest that you get your ass up and go apologize for being such a dumb fuck. Beg for her forgiveness if you gotta. Maybe get on your knees while you’re at it.” he sighs and stands, holding his hand out to Seungmin before pulling him up.
“How do you know she isn’t lying to you? How do you know she isn’t lying about anything else?” Seungmin finally says.
“Because she loves you too much to do that to you. God, have you always been this dense? You seriously need to wake up and realize how stupid you sound.” Jeongin mocks, prompting Seungmin to glare at him one last time before walking out of the studio. All the while unbeknownst to the younger standing with a frown threatening to pull at the corners of his mouth.
“He’s a fucking idiot if he let’s her go over this,” he mutters begrudgingly while he listens to the soft pur of Seungmin’s car in the distance.
-
Almost a week later you’re still waking up with puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks. The first thing you notice is Seungmin’s apartment key still sitting on the dresser untouched. Well, it used to be his. You were really hoping that it was all just a shitty nightmare and that you’d still be tucked in his side with his soft snores being the only sound to fill the room even though it’s been days.
You realize what had stirred you awake as another knock fills the almost suffocating silence. You’re half tempted to just ignore it, but something in your gut tells you to answer it.
“Oh, uhm- hi Innie.” you wipe your eyes with the sleeve of your hoodie. Or Seungmins hoodie, rather.
God you need to pull yourself together. How could you not even realize what you were wearing. Fuck.
“Hey,” Jeongin rocks back on his heels somewhat awkwardly, “Can I come in?”
You nod and mumble a soft ‘of course‘ as you move out of the way for him to slip past the threshold and into your apartment while you take a moment to collect yourself, and to put on the most convincing smile you can possibly muster.
“What’s up?” you find a spot on the couch next to him as he scans the room for a second, looking for any signs of whether or not Seungmin actually showed.
“He’s not here, is he?” Jeongin turns to you with sympathetic eyes, finding your own longing for comfort, seemingly pleading him for some sort of consolation.
“N-no but he’ll probably be back so-”
“He’s not coming back, y/n. If he was, it would’ve been days ago.”
Before you can open your mouth to protest, Jeongin has you pulled into his strong chest and tucks your head under his chin gently. “It’s okay, baby. I got you.” he sighs, rubbing small and slow circles on your back just the way he knows you like. He places a small, chaste kiss on the top of your head because he’s learned over the years that the action relaxes you and makes you feel secure.
Jeongin knows you like the back of his hand. Sometimes he thinks he knows you better than he knows himself. He knows your favorite food, your favorite season, your favorite movie. He knows how much you love to read, having periodically skimmed your shelves for books you may have and promptly buying you ones that you haven’t already buried your nose in.
Most importantly, he knows exactly what to say in order to subside your bad moods (he’s well seasoned in this field), and that sometimes you say things you don’t mean yet he never - and will never - hold that against you.
He knows just how much you loved Seungmin, not even wanting to imagine the amount of absolute heartbreak you’re feeling. Despite all this, he can’t help but feel somewhat relieved. You and Seungmin undoubtedly wouldn’t have worked in the long run and that’s exactly what you desire and deserve: a stable, long term relationship where you’d be taken care of and treated like the absolute goddess that Jeongin thinks you are.
He just wishes you give him a chance to treat you like his- more so than he already does now.
“Thank you, In,” you mumble into his chest.
“You don’t need thank me, baby. You know I’m always here.”
You did know that, you’ve always known that. Jeongin doesn’t let you doubt how much he cares for you, he’ll spend every waking moment reminding you if he has to.
You pull back slightly to look into his eyes. “I always end up burdening you with my problems.” Jeongin’s eyes soften at your apology and all he wants to do is hug and kiss and cuddle you until he thinks he’s convinced you enough of his adoration.
But for now all he can do is settle for words, though he can’t help but think it won’t be enough.
“Baby, please don’t be sorry for that. What kind of best friend would I be if I never listened to your complaints or rants?” Calling himself your best friend took more out of him than it should have and he tries to hide his hesitation. Thankfully you hadn’t noticed.
Hearing Jeongin say this makes you realize that he’s treated you better than any boyfriend you’ve ever had. Seungmin never reassured you like Jeongin does. Actually, now that you think about it, Seungmin didn’t do half of the things Jeongin does, even if it was the bare minimum.
He’s always like this, but why does it feel different now?
That’s just his personality, right? There isn’t any hidden meaning behind his words or gestures. Or the way he’s holding you and speaking to you like you’re the most precious thing he’s ever had contact with. The sudden urge to reach out and cup his face is unreal. You just want to make sure you aren’t hallucinating. You wonder how you managed to find such a perfect person who thinks the world of you just as much as you do them. Someone who loves you just as deeply and truly as you do.
Wait what?
You’ve singlehandedly scared and confused yourself all at once now. Obviously you love him and he does you, but it feels as though you love him in a different way. A special way, one that you don’t think you’ve ever felt for anyone. Not even Seungmin, who you once thought was hands down your soulmate.
What you failed to realize, however, was that your soulmate has been here the whole time, and he’s holding you in his arms like he never wants to let you go.
You cut off your train of thought because he doesn’t want you like that and you’re making assumptions that could get you hurt.
Too late.
Another wave of sadness that has nothing to do with Seungmin washes over you.
“Baby? Hey, where’d you go?” Baby. Fucking baby. He’s got to stop calling you that. You want to tell him to stop, so why can’t you open your mouth and form those simple words.
“Mhm, ’m okay.” You can’t even bring yourself to put the tiniest bit of distance between your bodies.
You mentally scream at yourself for sounding so noticeably pathetic. He must think you are. How could he not when you’re making it so painfully obvious?
“Don’t hide from me, baby. You know you don’t need to hide anything from me.” How ironic.
“I’m not- I just-” you huff and lean your forehead against Jeongin’s chest. God, when did he get so…buff? Has he always been like this?
He pulls your head back to force your gaze to meet his. “What did I tell you, hm? Talk to me. I’m all ears.” His arms encircling your body is the last straw before the world comes crashing down on you.
Tears flood your vision and you aren’t even sure as to why you’re crying this time.
Pathetic and dramatic. Great.
Jeongin immediately thinks he’s overstepped now, he took it too far and made you uncomfortable. He removes his hands from you immediately though the action kills him inside, when in reality you want the exact opposite. You want him to pull you closer, you want your chest flush against his to the point where you can feel his heart beating.
“I’m sorry, Innie. I’m sorry.” You finally climb out of his grasp and step away from him. He follows you and with every step he takes forward you move backward until you collide with the wall.
“Why are you sorry when you didn’t do anything wrong? I don’t want you apologizing to me for no reason. If anyone should be apologizing it’s Seungmin, but it’s his fault and his loss, you know that.” You wish Jeongin would stop being so supportive, it’s making it ten times harder to ignore your surfacing issues.
“That’s not the problem, Jeongin.”
Since when did you call him by his full name?
“Then what is it? Is it me? Please I- I just want to help you.”
Your tears have finally halted and you couldn’t be more thankful. You need to be able to properly look into his eyes.
“You can’t help me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I do.”
“Why are you being so difficult all of a sudden?”
“I’m not.” You cross your arms over your chest.
Jeongin blows out a frustrated huff. “Why can’t you tell me? Is it because Seungmin and I are friends becau-”
“I love you.”
“I know you do, which exactly is why you should be talking to me right now instead of bottling it all up-”
“No, Jeongin. I love you. Not in a friend way, not in a platonic way. I want to kiss you and hold you and-” You’ve worked yourself up so much you have cut yourself off in order to calm down.
Jeongin’s mouth stays agape for a solid five seconds before he even processes what you’ve said. “You love me?”
“Is that not what I just said?” Jeongin has to bite back his smile at your remark but quickly frowns again at the expression on your face. You look regretful, like you wish you never spoke. You’re just waiting for his rejection, willing it to come faster so you he’ll leave and you can wallow in self pity by yourself in the comfort of your bed. You disturbed the peace that was your friendship.
“I- the breakup is still fresh and you aren’t thinking straight, baby. Don’t say things you don’t mean.” Jeongin pleads. Is he trying to convince you or himself?
“But I do mean it Jeongin. I really do and I can’t believe it took me this fucking long to figure it out and I wish I’d never caught feelings because this is just a shit show now.”
He goes to speak but you quickly interrupt him. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. Just forget about it,” you expect him to leave, or to at least move away. But he doesn’t, instead he leans in closer to your ear and whispers in a hushed tone,
“Didn’t I just tell you to stop apologizing, baby?” The way he says ‘baby’ sends shivers down your spine, it’s different than the other times he’s called you that. This time his words actually do have a hidden meaning. His breath ghosts the shell of your ear for a moment before he slowly pulls back to look at you. As if he hasn’t studied your every feature to the point where you’re engraved in his mind.
“You have to promise me that you actually understand what you’re saying and that it isn’t the post breakup neediness talking.” He looks at you sternly and fully expecting a response in words.
You, on the other hand, have absolutely no intention of speaking as you instead grab him by the collar of his hoodie before pressing your lips against his.
Kissing your best friend is much more intimate than you ever expected. He kisses you like it’s not the first time and with more than enough purpose. It starts off aggressive but soon simmers down into a delightfully slow and passionate rhythm and as cliche as it sounds, it’s in this moment that you finally know where you belong, where your home is.
No matter the circumstances, Jeongin always left a space for you in his heart. His subconscious wouldn’t let him fill it with someone else even if he wanted (which he didn’t), forever waiting for you to find the spot with your name written all over it and stay there for as long as you may live.
❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥
tags: @skzstarnet @godslino @myseungsunglove @seungseung-minmin @azuna-sz @chanyeolsrealwife
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myspacebrat · 2 years
Text
Fooled round & fell in love (part five)
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Eddie Munson X Female!reader
summary: you’re in love with your best friend but your best friend thinks love is for losers, choosing to sleep around rather than settle down. You’ve had enough and you’re ready to move on from your feelings, luckily you find someone who might make that possible but does Eddie really hate love as much as he leads on?
warnings: angstttt, hurt/comfort, allusions to depression, mention of reader having a ponytail, reader has some self doubt, cussing, fluffff
A/N: This took me a little longer then I wanted, I had this chapter almost completely written out but didn’t save it so when I went to change a song on Spotify and went back the whole app refreshed and everything was gone, yes, I had a mini break down lmao but wow I’m so proud of this series and I so glad to finally get the finale posted 🖤 Thank you to everyone who took the time out to read it! Also extra points if you get the twilight reference.
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“Hey baby” rings out in your ears, your stomach drops at the sight in front of you, your feet feel stuck to the floor beneath you
“What are you doing here?” Eddie says to the blonde hanging off of his neck
“You called me and told me to come over, remember?” She says as she furrows her eyebrows
“I, what?” Eddie grits out while his jaw tenses
“Cmon baby, let’s have a repeat of the other night? I can’t stop thinking about you” she wines out
You’re still stuck, so silent the girl in front of you doesn’t even recognize your presence
But once those words leave her mouth, Eddie’s looking over at you with sullen eyes, and a look you couldn’t quite place, as he does, she finally realizes they’re not alone
“Who is she?!” She spits out
“Look you really need to go!”
“What the fuck Eddie? I said who is she?” The girl growled
“Get the fuck out!” Eddie yelled out
The girl turns to look at you while she clenches her jaw
“He’s just using you! I bet he said a bunch of crap that made you feel real special, huh?”
Eddie’s eyes widen at her words
She turns around rushing out of the door slamming it, almost making the whole trailer shake
“Y/n” Eddie says taking a couple steps towards you, he can see the tears brimming in your eyes
“Babe, please let me explain that” he says trying his best to be calm
Finally you snap out of whatever daze you’re in
“I can’t believe I actually fell for your bullshit, Eddie. What was she suppose to be your round two after I left?”
“What? No, no please I don’t even know what she’s talking about!”
“Yeah, okay, I’m gunna go” you grab your keys and head for the door
“Baby-“
“Don’t call me that, I’m not your baby, we’re not even friends, I wish I never let you touch me!” You say as tears roll down your cheeks
“Y/n don’t say that, please”
You race to your car and jump in slamming the door, as you peel off, you hear Eddie yelling your name, but you couldn’t even bring yourself to look at him in the rear view mirror. On your drive home you can barely see through the tears in your eyes, it’s late so luckily the streets are dead, and all you want to do is get home and curl up in a ball and cry yourself to sleep
How could Eddie tell you all of those things knowing he invited another girl over, like you were nothing but another notch on his belt, You really felt like you two connected on a different level, you thought maybe since Eddie has known you for so long that you would be different, you would mean more to him.
The blonde girls words kept playing back in your mind
“Repeat of the other night” “I can’t stop thinking about you” “he’s just using you” “I bet he said a bunch of crap that made you feel real special, huh?”
Okay yes he dropped the L word, yes he said you were his dream girl but is that just shit he says in the throes of passion?
You felt physically sick to your stomach, but apart of you wished you heard him out, listened to what he had to say.
You weren’t sure what to feel in this moment, so many emotions pulling you in different directions, you just wanted to scream
Finally you pull up to your drive way, and make your way inside. Luckily your mom’s asleep or else she would definitely ask questions about the mascara and tears staining your face, and you just couldn’t bring yourself to talk about it. As you trudge upstairs, you make it into your room shutting your door and yanking your clothes off, all of them smelling like Eddie and you just wanted them as far away from you as possible, you throw them in your hamper and pull on a big shirt as you slide under your covers turning out the lamp on your nightstand
You toss and turn, trying your hardest to fight back tears but you can’t they flow out of you like a stream
You cry so much your chest starts to physically hurt, and in that moment you promise yourself after you get this agonizingly painful cry out, you won’t shed anymore tears for Eddie
You continue to cry until you eventually drift off to sleep.
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The next morning you wake up to your phone ringing off the hook, you look at your clock on your nightstand, the big red numbers making your eyes squint a bit before they eventually adjusted, reading 12:42 pm, you sit up and stretch as the memories of the night before play like a movie reel in your head, your stomach twists as you remember every little detail of last night, you decide to ignore the phone and head to the shower wanting to scrub the nights events off your skin.
As you wrap a towel in your hair and put your black silk robe on tying it securely to your body, you make your way back into your room, you hear the phone go off for what seems like the 5th time, as much as you just want to shut down and lock yourself inside never having to deal with anyone again, you know thats just not realistic so you hesitantly walk over to the white house phone sitting on your desk.
You clear your throat as you answer
“Hello?” It comes out way more hoarse then you would’ve liked
“Sweetheart, please don’t hang up! I need to talk to you, please” Eddie let’s out in almost a panic
“Eddie, I have nothing to say to you, lose my number” you say as tears threaten to spill again, guess that promise you made to yourself is tougher then you thought
You slam the phone back down not wanting to hear another word from him.
As you make your way to your closet to pick out some clothes, your phone rings again, and now instead of tears you’re seething “can he not take the fucking hint?” You think to yourself
“I said leave me alone!” You bark out
“Woah, what did I do?” Robin says while removing the phone from her ear and looking at it in confusion
“Oh my god, Rob I’m so sorry, I thought you were someone else” you say as you let out a deep breath and let your tense shoulders deflate back to their normal position
“And who would that be?” She says as she laughs
“It’s not that important, anyway what’s up?” You say trying to change the subject
“Well, you never called me back after the other night, and I was just wondering how everything went with you and that Randy guy? But now i’m not so sure I should’ve brought him up” she says
“Oh, yeah me and Randy aren’t really talking anymore, we just kind of decided we weren’t for each other, I guess” you say trying to sound as convincing as possible
You didn’t wanna lie to Robin, she’s your best friend but you just couldn’t go into detail about the whole situation, god you were still humiliated enough by saying Eddie’s name while Randy made you cum, but also Eddie’s friends with Steve and Steve’s friends with Robin so you didn’t wanna create awkward tension between anyone, knowing Robin would have your back if she did run into Eddie. You’ll tell her eventually but now is just not the time
“I’m sorry, babe, well you know what they say, there’s more fish in the sea and all that” she says trying to be as empathetic as possible
“Yeah, well lucky for me I don’t think I’ll be exploring the sea for a very long time” you laugh out
“Hey, how about we hang out today? Maybe go to Benny’s and grab some burgers and shakes? Forget about the burdens of our failing love lives?” She says as she wiggles her brows up and down, like you can see her through the phone
“Um, yeah that actually sounds nice, I wouldn’t mind stuffing my face with some fries and a strawberry shake” you say almost excited
“Okay, I’m gunna tell Steve and we’ll be on our way to pick you up, say around 3:30?”
“Kay, I’ll see you then”
As you hang up you start to overthink, what if Eddie shows up, what if Eddie’s already told Steve, what if, after what if, and now you are almost tempted to call Robin back and cancel, but you know you can’t, you already made plans
Finally you walk back over to your closet and pick out your outfit for the day which consisted of high waisted jeans, a white tank top and a cropped leather moto jacket, you make your way into your bathroom to throw on as little makeup as possible just a little something to cover up the redness from a night of crying, you decide to just pull your hair into a ponytail on top of your head, leaving bangs and some face framing pieces out, you slip some sneakers on and after your finished you make your way downstairs, to watch some tv until Robin and Steve get there
After about an hour of mindlessly flipping through channels and finally landing on music videos on MTV, you hear a car pull up in your driveway, you walk over to the window peaking out, to see Steve’s bmw. You grab your bag, turn the tv off and head out the front door.
“Hey, there she is” Steve says with a smile
“Hey guys, thank you for picking me up” you say as you slide in the back seat
“Don’t mention it” Steve and Robin say in unison
“It really creeps me out when you guys do that” you say as you stifle a laugh
Steve shoots a playful glare at you in the rear view mirror, and you can’t help but to giggle, which in turn makes Steve laugh
“So” Robin says “do you need me and Stevie here to beat this Randy guy up?” She says as she looks back at you, and you wonder if she can tell you’ve been crying
“No, Randy’s not my problem” you say without giving that statement much thought
“You sure?” Steve says looking at you again in the rear view mirror almost trying to read your face
“Guys, I’m fine can we just go pig out, please?” You beg
“Fine, fine let’s go” Robin says as Steve puts the car into reverse and backs out of your driveway
Once you walk into Benny’s with Steve to your right and Robin to your left, you are greeted with a waitress who tells you to sit any where you’d like, so you all opt for your usual booth in the back. its pretty big as it almost wraps around the whole table, being able to sit up to at least 6 people.
You all scoot into the booth and begin talking about god knows what, it’s more Steve and Robin talking while you get lost in thought but pretend to listen as you nod your head to the little words you catch here and there.
But your ears perk up when you hear Steve mention Eddie’s name, Robin asked where he was and that we should’ve invited him, but Steve says he had some business to take care of, whatever that means.
Before you’re able to get back to your thoughts the waitress is asking if you’re ready with your orders, she’s tapping her foot and chewing her gum as she waits for Robin to decide whether she wants fries or onion rings. Once the orders are put in, Steve and Robin go back to their normal chatter and banter, while you butt in every once in awhile. You’ve never felt like this before almost too stuck in your head, like it’s almost impossible to follow through with a whole conversation. After everyone’s done eating, you’re ready to head back home and maybe hide out in your room for another couple of days, this was too much human interaction for you and you just wanted to be alone with your thoughts. Once you all are finished eating you split the bill and head back out to Steve’s car, as Robin gets in the front seat, Steve stops you
“Listen, Eddie told me what happened and as a friend to a friend I really think you should hear him out y/n” he says with doe eyes you almost feel like he’s trying to play this up for Eddie, make you feel bad so you’ll talk to him
“I really don’t have anything to say to him Steve, I mean I don’t know what he told you but what he did was really fucked up”
“Yeah he told me” he says nodding his head
Your eyes widen a bit
“Like everything?” You say as you look down
“Well I mean he didn’t go into detail if thats what you’re asking but I mean I know enough” he says
“And you don’t think thats fucked? Telling me he’s in love with me and then inviting another girl over? Like who does that?”
“I don’t think that’s exactly what happened y/n”
“Okay so what did happen Steve?” You say as you start to get annoyed
“I don’t know but Eddie wouldn’t do that to you, I’m just saying you should hear him out” he says as he heads back to his side of the car, opening the door and getting in, leaving you there as you stair at the ground, lost in thought. After a few seconds you make your way to the car and slide into the backseat
“Is everything okay?” Robin says as she looks from you to Steve
“Yup, everything’s fine” you say as Steve nods in agreement
Once they pull up to the curb in front of your house, you thank them and tell Robin you’ll talk to her later. You head inside greeting your mom who’s just got home from work, you tell her about your day and listen to her latest work gossip, and then you head up to your room, once inside you take off your jacket and jeans and leave your white tank top on and slip on some black cotton shorts. As you sit in bed you realize how exhausted you feel and decide to take a nap, and maybe deal with the whole “listening to Eddie” situation later
As you drift off to sleep you can’t help but to dream of Eddie, his face, his hands, his lips, god you wanted to hate him, but this was physically taking so much out of you, you were still so irrevocably in love with him
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The sounds of tapping wake you up from the best nap of your life. Once your eyes open and adjust to the darkness you hear the tapping again, as you sit up you realize it’s coming from your window, you stand up making your way over but as you look down into your driveway your breath hitches as you see Eddie releasing another rock into the air, as it hits the glass you flinch and back up, debating if you want to shut your curtains and go back to bed, but the conversation with Steve is still fresh in your mind, so without giving it a second thought you open your window
“Eddie, what are you doing here?” You hissed
“Come outside, please!” He yells back
“Eddie go home!” At this point you want him to beg before you hear him out
And almost like he read your mind, he yells back
“Please y/n, five minutes just give me five minutes!”
You close your window and go downstairs, throwing on the sneakers you wore earlier, as you head outside you see Eddie leaning against his van with a cigarette perched in his mouth, when he sees you he looks at you with the saddest eyes, as you get closer it almost looks like he’s been crying
“Your five minutes start now” you say as you fold your arms over your chest
“Okay, well what happened last night was not what you think, I never invited Becky over” he cries out
“Oh that’s her name” you think to yourself
“She said I called her and invited her over, and that was bullshit” he says as he fiddles with the cigarette in his hand
“Okay so enlighten me Eddie, what did happen?” You say a little condescending
“I spent all fucking day trying to figure that out, and after talking to a few people, I found out Becky and Randy are friends, like they definitely run in the same circle and what I believe happened is Randy asked her to come over and say that I invited her, how he knew you were there I don’t know, but I promise you sweetheart, I would never do some shit like that, not to you, everything I told you last night, I’ve been wanting to tell you for years but I was too stupid and too pussy. But that aside, I would never do anything, anything to lose you! Fuck y/n I mean I’ve never felt this way before and after last night I can’t even imagine being with anyone else. I don’t think my dick could get hard for anyone but you, now”
You roll your eyes at that
“Real romantic, Munson” you retort
“I’m serious” he says as he takes a step closer to you
You don’t move as he takes a couple more steps closer now standing directly in front of you, you’re looking up into his eyes trying to scan it for any bullshit, but all you see is sincerity and that makes your stomach flutter
“Okay, your five minutes are up” you whisper up to him as he looks down at you starring into your eyes
“Cmon y/n you have to believe me” he whispers back, as the hand without the cigarette comes up to cup your cheek, he’s surprised when you don’t make a move to pull away
“I do believe you” you whisper back as tears fill your water line
“But I don’t know, eddie” you say as you shake your head “I mean if we do this, what if you realize I’m not enough? What if you get bored? I can’t compete with all those girls, and that lifestyle” you say as the tears begin to fall
Eddie wipes them away with his thumb as his own tears threaten to spill
“Baby, you’re so much more than enough, you don’t have to compete with shit, because there is no competition, I want you, I’ve already had that and now I just want you, I want you to be mine”
“I have one more question” you spit out almost not thinking before you said it
“Yeah, anything?” Eddie says while nodding his head
“What did she mean by, I bet he said some crap that made you feel special? What did you tell her?” You say almost too nervous to hear the answer
Eddie let’s out a deep breath before he begins talking
“I’m gonna be honest with you, absofuckinglutely nothing, we barely talked I fucked her for a total of maybe four minutes, before I pretended to cum so she could get the fuck out of there. The only reason I went home with her was because I wanted to see if you’d get jealous maybe show me some kind of reaction but you were too busy cozied up to Randy boy, and then when I took her back to my place, I regretted it cause all I could think about was you. I really wanted to pull you off of his lap and drag you back home and teach you fucking lesson, god when I showed up to your house and seen you in that little outfit I had an instant hard on, I wanted to tell you how I felt then, but when you told me you were seeing someone I didn’t wanna ruin it for you no matter how jealous I was”
His words make your heart soar, you can’t believe you spent all night crying over something you shouldn’t have been crying over, now you felt like it was your turn to grovel
“I’m sorry, Eddie. I should’ve heard you out instead of assuming the worst” you say as you wrap your arms around his waste and put your chin on his chest
“S’kay baby, I’m just glad we’re okay, I’ve been a fucking wreck since last night”
“Me too” you say as you both laugh at each others sheer stupidity
“Hey do you wanna go for a drive or something?” He says looking at you with a glint of hope in his eyes
“Mm, I don’t know if I should” you say as you look back at your house, debating whether it’s a good idea
But when you look back into his doe eyes you can’t say no
“You know what, fuck it, yeah let’s go” you say with a smirk
“That’s my girl” he says back with his signature mischievous grin
my girl
I could get use to that.
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epilogue
THANK YOU FOR READING
PLEASE COMMENT AND REBLOG 🖤
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la-pheacienne · 3 months
Text
I saw Sara Hess saying that 1) Daemon and Rhaenyra feel like the same person in different bodies and 2) Daemon is a man so he can do whatever he wants (🥺) while poor Rhaenyra is stuck in a castle giving birth so she feels helpless. This does come across in their fight scene. This is so incredibly stupid it is actually painful.
First of all this "same person different bodies", cognitive dissonance thingy where a woman completely identifies with a man that is her relative but can't live the way he does is a Jaime x Cersei thing. Exclusively. This is their theme and cannot be applied to Daemyra. And that's because:
1) They are twins. The "same person in different bodies" vibe makes sense here. Self-explanatory. Daemon and Rhaenyra are both Targaryens and they have this obvious, visceral connection (in the book anyway lol) but they don't literally feel "the same person" to the point that they are unable to understand their individuality, in the sense Hess uses. At least there is nothing in the source material to suggest this. Fanon territory.
2) Cersei never held the same amount of power and authority Rhaenyra did because Cersei was not a Targaryen heir to the throne of the 7 kingdoms. Cersei was just a noble woman, a queen consort and a mother of a king. Rhaenyra was a Targaryen heir and Queen of the 7 kingdoms. Not gonna open the debate of whether or not a monarch can have more legitimacy than any other monarch. I think we can all agree, by following common sense, that the circumstances under which Cersei and Rhaenyra obtained power are substantially different so the authority of these two women is substantially different.
3) For that very reason, the dynamic that Cersei has with any other male in her life is not comparable to the dynamic Rhaenyra has with her father or husband/uncle. Viserys made Rhaenyra heir to the throne. Daemon is her consort, and he is set to serve her. The situation is entirely different with Cersei and her relationship with her father, brother, husband, and son.
3) Rhaenyra was eventually able to marry the man she wanted. The man she wanted. She was also able to have the family she wanted. Not the same situation with Cersei. This is extremely important lmao. Rhaenyra could have had any man she wanted, anyone, and she chose that man. For some reason the show wants us to forget this.
A lot of words to explain that Rhaenyra feeling "trapped" in her womanhood as opposed to Daemon enjoying his male privileges, and the frustration that causes her since she feels "they are the same person" with different gender roles, is an extremely reductive copy paste from Jaime x Cersei that completely misses the mark by neglecting that 1) Rhaenyra is the Queen and Daemon serves her, 2) Rhaenyra is in a marriage she chose freely against everyone's wishes, 3) Rhaenyra has the family she chose and is perfectly satisfied in her role as mother.
Book!Rhaenyra does not feel "trapped in a castle making babies while Daemon is out there fighting". Book!Rhaenyra is overjoyed with the fact that she can rule in Dragonstone, be a Queen, be a mother, raise her children, and on top of that have a man like Daemon at her service, as her sword and an extension of her will and power. Not only that's not causing her frustration, that's precisely what she likes about him and their relationship lmao. Yes they have a final fatal conflict, but not at that stage in the narrative. I'm sorry if this doesn't seem "progressive" enough to Hess or to you guys.
Also even in the context of the show Daemon's arguments are actually solid. Rhaenyra accuses him of not letting her consider the terms of their foes... girl, what terms? That her sons will become cupbearers? Lmao. Also, who is raising an army for her? Who crowned her? How did we go from show!Daemon fucking up with BxC to questioning whether or not he even recognizes her as his Queen? How did that happen? This fight feels so entirely detached not only from book canon but also from show canon.
For all these reasons their fight scene was incredibly stupid despite the good performance of the actors, and their bond, that should be at the core of the narrative, is hollow and flimsy. It's also incredibly boring and unsexy, sorry. It would have been better if they had at least established a firm, passionate relationship beforehand but they didn't even do that. Now I don't even know why she married him in the first place. It's not clear. I never saw genuine passion between them. Y'all love can yap about the gEnDeR rOLeS all you want but the truth is that the writers can't write romance to save their lives.
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crazystargirl · 11 months
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omg hiiii! i missed you! I honestly wish you would write a fic where jack and reader get caught kissing by either the avatar crew or the scream crew...or both tbh and then jack gets all flustered and awkward and yn is just like "yeah i did that"
I just thought it was a cute idea especially with your writing. No rush! I'm so glad your back and I hope you feel better now
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lovebirds!
pairing ! - jack champion x reader
word count ! - 0.6k
a/n ! - hi babe!! sorry my hiatus was so long 😭 but i am feeling much better now since ive been distancing myself from some of the ppl that im in a somewhat toxic relationship with. but i hope you like this since i might be a little rusty lmao, this is also somewhat of a sequel to take one 
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after meeting on the set of avatar 2, you and jack were very close to one another and your relationship got even better when you both found out you had roles in scream 6
jack was playing one of the ghostfaces, ethan landry, and you were playing his love interest who knew all about his family's little secret
you guys grew close to the cast, but chose to keep your relationship private since if there was one thing you knew about jack, it was that he got VERY flustered when people started teasing him about you and would basically just give away the whole secret
that's why the avatar cast knew about your relationship and which is why you made jack keep your relationship a secret from the scream cast
and it worked out just fine, you guys acted like a goofy duo in public and a couple who seemed really in love in private
until you decided one day that jack looked WAYYYY too kissable in his halloween outfit
you two were sitting on the set of the house where the frat party was taking place, jack in his murder party costume and you in the lavender fairy outfit
there was a few issues with the set that they were fixing and jenna, jasmin, and devyn were going over lines which left you very bored
jack nudged you with a small grin
"you look so bored out of your mind right now"
you turn to him with a smirk and he knew damn well you had an idea that he wasn't going to agree with but would go along with any way since he loved you so much
"well i am…can we go back to your trailer?" 
"y/n/n…"
jack gave you a knowing look but still allowed you to drag him to his trailer
he sat down and you quicky sat next to him, kissing him as he swatted you away but was also bringing you closer at the same time?
"y/n your makeup is gonna get ruined…" jack murmured as you pulled away for air
"jack it's ok! they can just redo it" you replied, going in for another kiss and jack gave in, pulling you on his lap
you kept kissing for what felt like hours and you two were in your own little world that you didn't even hear devyn and jenna giggling and approaching the trailer
suddenly the door slams open and you hear jenna gasp and devyn squeal in excitement
"fuck fuck fuck" jack mutters, getting you off of his lap before one of them could get the other cast members to come
he stood up, pulling you up with him just as mason and jasmin came
"so we caught the two lovebirds kissing" devyn says with a grin as jenna nods excitedly
jack shakes his head and gets flustered but you on the other hand? you couldn't be more fazed
"ok yeah we were kissing, we're dating so what's the problem?"
everyone looks at you in shock even jack, not expecting you to be so straight forward with your relationship
"oh um nothing! it's just we're all shocked" mason replied, scratching the back of his neck
"we'll leave you two love birds now, just don't give her a hickey!" jasmin says, walking out as mason, jenna, and devyn follow her
devyn slams the door shut and jack looks down at you, feeling flustered
"well that was um"
you giggle and pull him down for a kiss, which he gladly accepted to soothe him from the shock of whatever the fuck he just witnessed
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taglist ! - @xyzstar, @gwenlore, @dizscreams, @kaesworldxx, @urmomcomsiimiamour, @nonniesworld, @chemtr4ilz, @abodyhasbeenfound, @phsychobanana
lmk if you want to be added/removed !
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