#and that people don’t tend to understand and if they do they never uphold that fact

[kavehayati]

Chappel Roan saying she’s sad she’s demisexual and then there’s me being aroace as a whole like don’t you think I’m even more sad 😭

[greenqueenhightower]

Hey, this may be controversial to some & even offensive but I have to say that Alicent’s motherhood is very understandable to me as someone who grew up in South Asian family. Not making any generalisations, but the community around me & even within my family there are so many Alicents who were robbed of their lives or dreams and given up by their families in arranged marriages. They are expected to uphold their duty as a wife & mother and they end up continuing the vicious cycle of abuse & torment. From my experience & what I have witnessed in my life, they grasp at what little power they have and inflict all that pain & bitterness towards their children. It doesn’t mean they do not love them. It’s such a complex, messed up situation that they will be the first ones to defend their kids from the outside world, but also pass on the cycle of abuse & inflict the pain on them.

It’s probably this cultural differences that makes me empathise and hold onto Alicent a lot. Because her portrayal is so real & heartbreaking to me. She does not live up to the societal ideal view of a mother, she is not even a good mother. But she doesn’t even know how to be one when such behaviour is what’s normalised in her own life. When people say that modern Alicent would be a “woman for Trump” I genuinely don’t get it. It’s such a shallow and surface level reading of her character. Societies like HoTD exist in the modern world & there are many Alicents out there. I think a modern Alicent would probably, hopefully, live in a society where she wouldn’t be tied to her father’s greed or she would even end up having similar life as she does now.

Hi anon 💚

Thank you so much for sharing; you’re making an excellent point about how South Asian women find themselves trapped in that vicious circle of oppression and service to duty, and then it’s difficult for them to express love. Your analysis of Alicent’s character is spot on; I also think that women like Alicent exist nowadays, and there are families who have or have had women like Alicent among them.

Growing older and looking at things from a more distant and healthier perspective, I’ve also realized I’ve met women like Alicent in my life. I understand Alicent’s inability to express love (even if she feels it immensely) because I’ve seen how it’s possible for a mother living her life feeling unloved herself and thinking that she will never be good enough.

I’ve seen women being forced to fulfill the family’s expectations by being married off at a young age, having children and tending the house and upholding the family’s values, only to be impossibly strict and emotionally distant from their children who grow up and have emotionally distant children of their own. These women are grandmothers now and if you ask them what they’d change in their life they’ll tell you they wish they had stayed girls for longer. They never grew up to find, love, and appreciate themselves as it happens in someone’s late teenage years/early adulthood, and they grew to hate themselves for denying themselves any freedom and agency. Their own mind and bodies became the oppressors in the end.

Like you said, the cycle of abuse continues and I’m so glad when people like you write their thoughts on Alicent and her relationship with motherhood because they are so insightful and so in tune with Alicent’s character.

[pokegyns]

Reclaiming “TIRF”

now i won’t say i personally call myself a tirf, and i absolutely respect the choice of any radfems who refuse to call themselves tirfs because that sounds like radfeminism centers trans people, i believe transmascs deserve to feel safe & respected within feminist spaces, as radfeminism (despite being heavily misrepresented) does have a tendency to mistreat transmascs & dismiss their struggles, as well as pretend dysphoria isn’t real/cannot ever be neurological. gender critical transmascs & their allies should have the right to reclaim the term tirf, similarly to how radfems who aren’t actual transphobes but have been called terfs have the right to reclaim the term terf. true nuancefems, who can be critical of gender whilst still not being discriminatory to trans people.

i understand that a lot of radfems who aren’t close-minded on trans topics call themselves terfs in an ironic way, to mock tras when they start with the harassment. but we also have to keep in mind that there has been a slow, but rising trend of conservative women co-opting our terms. they are downright right-wing & bigoted. they often tend to also target intersex women, detrans women, black & brown women– and generally everyone who they can call a “dirty male invading (white) women’s spaces”. their ideology is built on vulgar materialism, eurocentrism & white supremacy. they support transvestigating, and they want to achieve their goals of “total female protection” through invasive measures such as inspection of genitals. we shouldn’t jump to say “this never happens”– it does. mainstream tras often protect horrible people within their community, fearing that even simple criticism of “their own” will destroy their reputation, when it would actually improve it. they refuse to outcast those people, while outcasting others who merely disagree with them on an ideological level. this proves their corrupt immaturity & inability to conversate with understanding & nuance. we shouldn’t be like them. we need to outcast the genuinely hateful people, and show that they have no place in our community. they aren’t our allies. while i don’t believe that women can systemically harm trans women (i do, however, believe they can systemically harm trans men, though in a very very limited way, but the focus should be directed at cis men & not at them when talking about antitransmasculinity), women can definitely be hateful & still perpetuate & uphold bigotry & discrimination. these people also often use ableist slurs & call disabled people sensitive when they call them out, as well as using fetishistic slurs against trans people, especially against transfems. they often use conservative talking points & portray trans people in a weird & derogatory manner, mocking surgeries & bodies.

on the other hand, there are a lot of women who aren’t intersexist, racist, or otherwise bigoted– but they still tend to be close-minded on trans issues. they are often 100% anti-transition under every circumstance. i don’t believe ostracizing & outcasting them would be productive, as they often are detrans women who empathize with dysphoric people, but because the affirming-model harmed them, they harbor a lot of pent-up anger & express it in an extremist way. we should be conversating with them & exchanging opinions, but we still should be very careful not to harm the trans people in our own community & we shouldn’t force one-on-one conversation if the trans people in our community feel uncomfortable with that. i myself used to call myself a terf, but i feel quite uncomfortable with that, being trans myself– although i’ve been called one on multiple occasions. nowadays, simple things such as acknowledging biology & sexuality are considered terfy, it’s laughable.

i felt aversion to the term “tirf” for a little while, as there has been a recent boom of liberal feminists realizing that militant feminists are starting to mock them, so they started co-opting feminist branches. some of them call themselves intersectional feminists, although intersectional feminism is not its’ own school of theory. others call themselves marxist feminists without reading any theory, as they believe it’s simply the trans-inclusive alternative to radfeminism. some of them are starting to call themselves radfems, but they are always extra careful to preface that they are trans-inclusive. of course, libfems don’t give a damn about dysphoric people– they just weaponize our pain & scream “choice!” at everything they encounter. they are simply afraid of being mocked by feminists. there is, however, a portion of tirfs who are generally just afraid of being judged by tras. i do not think they can be considered real radfems (even if they express otherwise radfem views; anti-porn, anti-sw, anti-beauty industry, etc.), as radfeminism is inherently gender abolitionist, but we need to be welcoming to them, as they are usually nicefems whose fears should be understood. a lot of us were once in their position. being mean to them is counterproductive, we should let them go through their own journey of peaking.

i still personally feel levels of aversion to the term tirf, but if more actual nuanced radfems start using the term, maybe it will boom into some unexpected rising branch of nuanced radfeminism. radfems who, despite not actually being transphobic, can feel free to call themselves “terfs” in a mocking sense, as i believe it’s harmless. we shouldn’t mimic mainstream tra behavior & lock ourselves up in another echo-chamber, except this time instead of it being a tra echo-chamber it would be a magical tirf echo-chamber or whatever. shouting “op is a terf!” would just bring about unnecessary alienation. it would just remind me once again of the times i felt pressured to repress my beliefs & add a “terfs dni!” disclaimer every time before making a slightly-more-than-mainstream feminist point. but we should still be careful of making the trans people within our own community feel safe, and not letting actual genuine transphobes (so, not gender criticals & gender abolitionists & homosexuals, geez, i mean the actual hateful transphobes) in our spaces. i feel the term “terf” is not a good enough descriptor anyway, since the people who co-opt our terms to make bad faith (often conservative) points are not only discriminatory against trans people, but also people of color, intersex people, disabled people, detrans people & often also gay people. we can call out hate & bad faith points without alienating ourselves from our community, and we can outcast horrible people within our community without using meaningless terms to throw at them, the very same terms that are used against us 24/7 anyway as well.

– mod zoroark

[mywitchyblog]

hey! i just wanted to say I love your posts, they have been really insightful. now, I don't really know if you answer these, but I will try anyways: do you have any advice for an "older" shifter? i haven't shifted yet and every single shifter I see is either a teenager or just above the age of 18. i know it's silly, but i can't help but wonder if maybe I'm too old for this, or maybe it's harder for me because I'm older. I'm currently in my mid-20s and i'd really love to experience other realities, but my age makes me really self-conscious.

Hey! First off, thank you so much for your kind words! I’m really glad that my posts have been insightful for you, and I appreciate you reaching out.

Now, to your question—I think this is an incredibly important topic, so I’m glad you brought it up. Honestly, you’re not alone in feeling this way. A lot of older shifters or those who are just starting out later in life express similar concerns, so let's break it down:

"Maybe I'm too old for this."

Absolutely not! You are never too old to shift, and it’s never too late to begin your journey. Shifting is not something bound by age. Whether you're in your mid-20s, 30s, or beyond, the ability to explore other realities doesn’t diminish with time. If anything, life experience and maturity can make your shifting journey richer. It’s a misconception—often perpetuated by younger communities like Shiftok—that shifting is somehow reserved for teens or young adults. But that’s simply not true. Shifting is a deeply personal and timeless practice, and you deserve to explore it fully, without limiting yourself based on age.

"Maybe it's harder for me because I'm older."

It's important to understand that shifting is not intrinsically harder because of your age. However, it can feel more challenging due to the mental and emotional conditioning we've picked up over the years. As we age, we tend to accumulate more doubts, limiting beliefs, and external pressures. These things can sometimes cloud our ability to let go and embrace the shifting process. But that doesn’t mean it’s impossible or inherently more difficult—just that it may take some extra work to unlearn those blocks. Shifting is as hard or easy as you allow it to be; don’t let societal or internalized pressures convince you otherwise.

"I'd really love to experience other realities."

Then do it! That desire to explore other realities is valid and worth pursuing, no matter your age. Whether it's to experience new dimensions, timelines, or alternative versions of yourself, your curiosity is a driving force that will help you in the process. Pop off and dive into it with excitement! There’s no age restriction on exploring the multiverse—your potential to shift is as boundless as your imagination.

"But my age makes me really self-conscious."

This is a completely understandable feeling, and it’s something I’ve heard from others too. There’s a certain pressure in the shifting community, especially online, where younger shifters dominate the space, and that can make older individuals feel out of place. But trust me, age should not make you feel self-conscious about shifting. If anything, your age gives you unique perspectives and strengths in the shifting process that younger people might not have.

Now, here's something I feel really strongly about: stick to your age range. And here’s why—if you saw my storytime, "My Hatred of Shiftok," you know I talked about how toxic and hypocritical some teenage shifters can be. Many of them uphold nonsensical double standards and promote an environment where older shifters might feel out of place or judged for being “too old.” There’s this idea that shifting is only for younger people, which is completely false. A lot of these younger shifters are inexperienced and push harmful narratives, making it difficult for older shifters to feel welcome. That's why I strongly recommend staying true to your age and experience level.

There’s no reason to follow the misguided standards set by people who are still figuring out their own shifting journey. You have wisdom and maturity on your side, and that can be a huge asset. I’ve also written extensively about shifting and age, so I’d recommend checking out my posts on the topic. They reflect my personal beliefs, knowledge, and experience, all backed by solid arguments that show why age isn’t, and shouldn’t be, a barrier.

If you're interested in aging yourself down to experience another side of life, that’s also a valid option to explore through shifting. But don’t feel pressured to change your age just because you’re self-conscious about it. You’re not wrong to feel that way, but I want to emphasize that you don’t need to shift your age just to fit in.

In short, don’t let your age hold you back or make you doubt your ability to shift. Your self-consciousness is a valid feeling, but it doesn’t define your journey. Shifting is about exploring your consciousness, your potential, and your desires. You deserve to experience it fully, no matter how old (or young) you are.

At the end of the day, shifting is a personal practice meant to enhance your life and help you grow. Your age doesn’t limit that; only your mindset does.

[sakuralovespossums]

Anton Chigurh x Adopted Daughter Reader

Let’s get this out of the way, canon Anton is a merciless killer who will kill a kid if he wants to. But for the sake of this fic, he’s a bit less brutal.

Warning: Brief descriptions of child abuse, human trafficking, reader has trauma and isn’t the most mentally healthy, Anton being a questionable parent

Anton found you tied up in the trunk of his latest target’s car. Apparently the guy he was hired to kill was a human trafficker who your parents sold you to

When he freed you, you were shaking and traumatized, looking up at him in fear and confusion

Anton believed him finding you was a rare change of fate and you were now tied to him, according to his strange philosophy

So he took you with him

He doesn’t see you as a daughter nor does his drive to take care of you stem from paternal instinct like with normal people. He simply believes he must do so to uphold his belief in fate

You’re just happy to finally receive food, clothes, and shelter. You quickly notice how off putting and quiet he is, but he’s still a lot better than your old parents, so you grow attached anyway

You often ask him lots of questions or talk about whatever (like a lot of kids do) and he gives a short reply in his monotone voice

He never plays with you, so you play or run off by yourself. Yet he’s always sitting or standing nearby

Your more closed off and shy around other people, but more lively and happy around Anton since he’s the only one you trust

He teaches you how to shoot and reload at a young age, in case you need to defend yourself when he’s gone

Your a pretty obedient kid but when Anton needs to be firm with you, he never yells but gives you a look and you immediately obey

You still love him deeply and don’t really care that he kills people. He was the only adult to ever offer you care and safety when every other one hurt you

You’re always close by his side wherever you go, usually holding his hand

As you grow older, you become a lot more vocal but still distrust other people

You always tend to Anton’s wounds whenever he comes back bloodied from his latest job

You’re pretty protective of him and scold him to be more careful. He doesn’t listen tho

When you’re an adult, Anton decides he’s done his part and leaves you

Like just literally out of the blue. No letter, no call, nothing. You just wake up one morning alone in the motel room

You know how Anton is though and come to understand why he left and accept it. You’ll never forget him and will always look back on your interesting upbringing under his wing

People might say you deserved a better guardian who could have given you actual love, but you hated the idea of having anyone else as your guardian

Anton wasn’t an ideal father figure, but he still taught you everything you needed to know to survive in this world

you either become a hitman like Anton or manage to live a normal life within society (you still carry a weapon with you either way)

You: Hey Anton

Anton: …………..

You: Why did you take me with you when you found me as a kid?

Anton: ………..Because you were there

You: ……….alright

………………………………………..I love you

[ikemenlibrary]

Humanity (Ikémen Vampire)

Pairing: Comte de Saint Germain x MC Summary: Yet another year on earth, and Comte battles with himself and what it means to be alive and love someone so human.

Word Count: 1.8k

Warnings: Talk about humanity and the meaning of human life, naked Comte, naked MC, there's implied sex but nothing sexual

A note from the author: Happy birthday to the character who made me fall in love at first glance. I never believed in cliche romances before he came along.

The scent of sweet vanilla wafted through Comte de Saint Germain’s nose and he sensed her presence before her delicate arms wrapped around his shoulders from behind. Comte had spent all day in his office responding to piles of letters he had neglected due to spending more time with his lover as of recently.

It was late when she came to check in on him, most of the residents of the mansion had already retired to their bedrooms for the night and Comte could hear Sebastian gently close the linen closet located off the kitchen, signaling he was done with work for the night.

“Good evening, Ma Chérie,” Comte greeted her quietly. His voice was a tad bit hoarse from not speaking all day.

“Hello my love,” she greeted back warmly, her chin going to rest on the top of his head. “You’ve worked quite a bit today.”

Comte grimaced, a pang of guilt throbbing as his stomach as he remembered earlier how he had brushed off her advances for joining him for afternoon tea. “Ah, yes. Well, when you’re at the top of Paris’s aristocratic food chain, you tend to get bogged down with work sometimes.” He chuckled lightly when he felt her chest heave in a silent laugh at his bad joke.

She fondly pushed back a piece of his hair that had fallen while Comte had started to work, and just that little act of affection had Comte closing his eyes and leaning his whole body toward her warmth. Sighing, he pushed himself back up in his chair, hunching over the dozen or so letters littering his desk. “What is it that’s so urgent this time?” 

She placed herself upon the edge of his desk, curiously glancing at all the papers. Comte held one up, his eyes glinting, mischievous behind the tiredness. “Seems as if my dear old friend has once again caught the affection of some of the noblewomen he met in town. I must turn them down before they start booking dates at the church.”

Peering down at the letter, she giggled as she realized it was yet another letter of a marriage proposal addressed to Leonardo. How anyone still had the patience to try with him, she would never understand. He never gave the women in town more than a polite smile and a small conversation, and yet that was enough for them to fall for him. “Don’t work too much later, darling.” She cooed, hopping off his desk and running her hand affectionately across his shoulder. “You need to take time to rest, too.” She waited a moment for his response, and when she realized she wasn’t going to get one, she pressed a kiss to the crown of his head, and left his office as quietly as she came. 

She was too sweet to him, her unwavering kindness not something he was deserving of. But, nonetheless, he would relish in her warmth, and hold her a little tighter to him the next time she was laid in his arms. He promised her an eternity of love, and he would do everything in his power to uphold that promise. 

After sealing yet another letter with his stamp, Comte leaned back in his chair as he heard footsteps approaching his office. Two sets this time. His two favorite people. The door creaked open noisily, and it was Leonardo who stepped in first, Comte’s lover following close behind with a determined look in her eyes.

“Alright, old man, I can do the rest of these. Time for you to get out of here for the night, or she’s gonna chew me out again.” Leonardo chuckled, looking at the woman with adoration in his eyes. Though his words weren’t as kind, Comte knew his dearest friend held nothing but love for that woman in his heart, and Comte would have it no other way. He loved that they got along, and when they bickered like children, it reminded him of the beauty of youthfulness. Comte watched as his beloved sent a glare towards Leonardo, and he chuckled as his friend held his hands up with mock surrender. “It’s not my fault all the women in town find me irresistible.”

“It is your fault when you do nothing to dissuade them,” Comte remarked, pushing out his chair and smoothing out the creases in his pants as he stood up. 

“Maybe if they knew how much of a messy slob you were they’d-” Comte cut off his wife with a kiss. She was teasing, but he knew if she started in on Leonardo, that it would only lead to them hurling insults at each other like siblings, and Comte was tired. He wanted to stow away with his lover and enjoy some time together before the evening grew too late. 

“If you want to finish the last of these, I can have Sebastian post them tomorrow.” Comte gestured to the last few open letters on the desk and he sighed as Leonardo plopped himself in his chair, his heavy boots banging noisily on the desk as he propped them up, crossing one leg over the other.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll finish these up so I can go back to sleep. Cara mia decided she didn’t care about my wellbeing and woke me up to put yours first.” Leonardo grabbed one of the letters on the table, and as she gripped Comte’s hand in her own, Leo looked over his shoulder. “And Comte?” The man hummed in response. “Happy birthday.”

“Thank you, my dear old friend.” Comte accepted the wish gracefully, a soft smile playing on his lips as the pair left his office, closing the door gently behind them. Instead of heading to their shared bedroom, she led Comte in the other direction toward the bathing room. It was well past  scheduled times for using it, and although it could be seen as a waste of water, Comte followed her silently, ready to sink his aching muscles in warm water and hold her close.

They undressed together, and although they had each been naked around each other many times before, he took his time uncovering every inch of her skin. His hands deftly loosening her corset, letting her poofy dress drop to the ground and he leaned his head down, kissing her bare shoulders, following down the path to her collarbones, and up over her neck. The swell of her breasts pressed into his body, and although he wasn’t yet bare, the familiar ache in the pit of his stomach pulled at the red string tying them together, the want - no, need - for her pulling him even further into her embrace as she reached up to unclip his tie, her hands making quick waste of all of le Comte’s layers. 

Comte felt bashful admiring her bare body. No matter how many times she had allowed his eyes to gaze upon her beauty, it always felt like the first. Especially when she had that delightful blush on her cheeks, as she embraced him, her arms wrapping around his neck as he inched their faces closer together, his lips brushing delicately against hers. “Shall we?” He asked quietly, gesturing to the steaming, bubbly water that had filled the room. She nodded, seemingly under the same impression that Comte was under: that the quiet was magical in that moment. 

She followed him in, and as he sank down onto the bench, the warm water flowing over him, she followed, her bare thigh touching his own as she sat down. She had put her hair up, her usual cascading curls now resting high up on her head so as not to get them wet, and Comte took a second to admire her like this: flushed cheeks, a delicate sheen of sweat covering her skin, and her neck bare and exposed. She looked lovely, a delectable vision that had Comte regretting never applying himself to learn any sort of artistic abilities. He wanted to paint her, to have this moment framed for safekeeping forever. To remind himself of how beautiful humanity could be at its core, how beautiful the creature before him is. In the endless sea of eternity, he found her, and she brought him back to life in a way that he would’ve never imagined before her. In a way that he was never able to imagine - only daydream about, for a long time.

“Abel,” her voice cut through his thoughts, and she giggled as the bubbles she blew towards him fluttered down on top of his head. “What are you thinking about?”

“Hmm,” he replied, his arm snaking around her waist, pulling her onto his lap, his arms circling her tightly, holding her to him as secure as he could. “Just about how much I love you, Ma Chérie.”

“Oh really?” She replied, demurely. Her arms wrapped around his neck, moving to straddle him, the water sloshing around them. “And how much is that?”

“Infinitely,” le Comte conceded, his breath ghosting over her collarbones as he rested his forehead against her shoulder. “And forever.”

“Will we have forever?” She asked, her eyes filled with uncertainty. He knew what she was asking. One day, his fangs would pierce her rosy flesh and he would plunge her into the deep eternity known as a vampire’s life, but it wasn’t time for that. It wasn’t time to take away the fragile humanity for her that threaded her to this life with a golden thread. It would be one day, but that day could wait to come. 

“Of course, we have forever every day that I wake up as a man who gets to be loved by a woman as wonderful as you.” And finally, he captured her lips in the kiss he’s been daydreaming about all day, the only thing that kept his motivation going when he wanted to give up his work. Each breath she breathed into his lips only made him fall in love with humanity even more, the throb of her swollen bitten lips, the pink flush that went from her cheeks all the way down to her décolletage. Some may argue that it was her he was in love with, and with that, he would agree. But she is the reason he fell so deeply in love with the idea of human life being as sacred and guarded as it. 

“Happy birthday, my love.”

She was the reason he had even a sliver of humanity left.

“Thank you, mon amour.” Every day, she would be the reason for him to continue striving towards finding more and more of his humanity hidden away behind locked doors, and with each year to come, he would continue to hold her beating heart in his hand, next to his own. Until one day, it stopped beating, and even then, he would love her - and the humanity and kindness and everything that made her, her - forevermore.

[personality-corner]

Crash Course on MBTI: The Eight Functions (Part 1)

I was thinking of things to do on this blog, besides just character typings, and I thought about how to explain the basics of MBTI to people who may know nothing about MBTI, or people who are only aware of 16 personalities. So I will be doing a three part series on the very very basics of MBTI.

Understanding each cognitive function by itself is the first step of understanding MBTI as a whole, so that’s what this post will focus on. Part two will focus on stacking, and part three will focus on the types as a whole.

What is a cognitive function?

Cognitive functions are the bones of each Myer-Briggs type, the way each type operates in the world around them. Cognitive functions can be divided into two groups- judging and perceiving. The functions are as followed:

Judging (Thinking & Feeling)

Fi (Introverted Feeling)

Fe (Extroverted Feeling)

Ti (Introverted Thinking)

Te (Extroverted Thinking)

Perceiving (Sensing & Intuition)

Ni (Introverted Intuition)

Ne (Extroverted Intuition)

Si (Introverted Sensing)

Se (Extroverted Sensing)

As we explore in part two, everyone has two of each, and each function is paired with their opposite. For example, you will always see an Fi paired with Te, you will never see Fi paired with Ti. And both pairs of cognitive functions will make your MBTI type.

If you’re confused by how this works, we will definitely learn more in part two.

Introverted Feeling (Fi) vs. Extroverted Feeling (Fe)

The main difference between Fi & Fe, is how they project their emotions. Given the names, Fi users feelings come from within themselves, whereas Fe users feelings come from within. So what does this mean?

The most simple explanation, is that Fi users value personal values, while Fe users value community values. This however, does not mean that Fi users are selfish, or that Fe users don’t have personal values, however.

An example of a healthy Fi user, is Lucy Gray Baird, from a Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes. She cares about other people, she seems the good in other people, but she shows her love by having a strong moral code. She doesn’t lie to others, because it’s not right. She values trust, which she upholds on her end.

However, a good example of an unhealthy Fi user, is Penelope Featherington from Bridgerton. She is raised in a very unhealthy household in general, and feels like her feelings are unvalued, so therefore, she expresses her emotions through a gossip column. She often sits on her emotions for so long, without action, to the point where she ends up making horrible choices.

A good example of a healthy Fe user is Moana. Her values are community based, and she is not easily swayed by her own interests. She had her own goals- everyone does- but she consistently pushes them aside for the sake of her village. Eventually, however, she is able to find a balance, a way to reach her goals and to make herself and others happy, instead of simply sacrificing her own happiness for others.

An example of an unhealthy Fe user is Gretchen Wieners, who is obsessed with being liked and social status. She is mean to the other girls to maintain her role as Regina’s right hand, and she is constantly giving up parts of herself for the sake of Regina. Her hooped earrings, for example.

Ti (Introverted Thinking) vs. Te (Extroverted Thinking)

The simplest way I’ve heard Te and Ti described is Te is objective logic, while Ti is subjective logic. What this means is that Te users trust systems that give them clear, observable and objective results, where as Ti users explore logic for the sake of knowledge. Ti users may come up with their own theories and systems of logic to understand the world around them, as well as arguing against commonly accepted logic. Te users feel most comfortable using data and systems that are presented to them and seem to work, and tend not to go against what they know.

A good example of a healthy Ti user is Kristoff from Frozen. He abides by his own systems of logic, and uses this to challenge Anna with her own flawed logical system, due to her isolation. He also has a good handle on his Fe, despite being so low in his stack, which means his logic is somewhat grounded in reality.

An example of a character who is an unhealthy Ti user, is Leo Valdez in the Heroes of Olympus series. Leo, like Kristoff has his Fe very low on his stack, and tends to be so caught up in his own Ti, that he ignores the feelings of others, or ignores his need for social interaction altogether, because it’s harder for him.

A good example of someone with healthy Te is Tiana, from the Princess and the Frog. Though she gets healthier through the course of the movie, her want for results and her need to achieve her goals never gets in the way of her being a nice person. She doesn’t step on people on her way to achieving her goals, she just wants to achieve them on her own terms.

An example of someone with unhealthy Te is Abuela Alma from Encanto. She is controlling over her family, even when she thinks it’s what’s best for them. She doesn’t address her own feelings, which causes her to be rather harsh when it comes to how she addresses the family. She wants results, but she doesn’t stop to think about the real reason the Encanto and the gifts are so important to her anyways.

Ni (Introverted Intuition) vs. Ne (Extroverted Intuition)

Intuitive functions, in my opinion are very hardest ones to explain, especially to those who have no idea what I’m talking about, so I’ll do my best. Ne is divergent / scattered ideation, while Ni is linear ideation. Both focus on your inner world, and concepts a lot of times involving the future, but they are different in doing so.

Ni has a singular focus, a way to get from point A to point B. A specific way they see certain events conspiring, and rarely stray away from said idea, until it is either proven false, or no longer relevant to them.

Ne users bounce from idea to idea very easily, and lose interest in ideas very quickly. They usually keep their options open, and to them they see many different ways a situation could go.

When thinking about the future, an Ne user may go, “This may happen in the future” or “This is a possible scenario.” Ni users may go, “This will happen in the future,” or “This is the right scenario.”

A good example of a healthy Ni user is Annabeth Chase from Percy Jackson. While she can be quite arrogant at times, she also has the ability to narrow in on one thing and move on when information is no longer relevant. She is able to notice what’s going on in the world around her, and somewhat leans into her Se to work with her Ni.

An example of an unhealthy Ni user is Orpheus from Hadestown. Orpheus is oftentimes way too hyper fixated on his own goals and his own ideas, that he ignores his Se altogether. He doesn’t notice Eurydice leave, because he is so focused on finishing his song, because that’s the only idea he has to bring summer back. He is also so hyperfixated on the idea that Hades is betraying them, that he looks back.

A good example of a healthy Ne user, is Hiro Hamada from Big Hero 6. Hiro has a plethora of ideas, and he doesn’t necessarily commit to one, but his ideas are somewhat grounded in reality. Though some of his ideas seem far fetched to other people, he also uses his experience in robotics to justify it.

An example of an unhealthful Ne user is Luna Lovegood. Ne isn’t her dominant trait, but it is high in her stack, and alot of times, her ideas are not grounded in reality at all. She is so obsessed with multiple views of the world around her, that she doesn’t really stop to think critically about the information she’s spewing.

Se (Extroverted Sensing) vs. Si (Introverted Sensing)

Se and Si both rely on the outside world, but Se observes and reacts as it happens, Si focused on information we already know about the outside world. Most people describe it mainly as observation vs. experience.

Si users, especially high Si users, may rely on routines, and traditions to guide their decisions. Oftentimes, they may be more comfortable sticking to a routine and experience than they do reacting to new information. In some cases Si users may come off as obsessed with past events, and lean very heavily on these past events to make decisions.

Se users react to information as it is given to them. They focus on the present, and may be intrigued by things such as aesthetic, and the world around them. They may be easily stimulated by physical experiences, such as exercise or thrill rides.

An good example of a healthy Si user is Cosette from Les Miserables. Though she has a sad childhood, and she does use her experiences to define the present, she also has a strong relationship with her Ne. Her experiences are very important to her, so are her personal traditions with Marius, but she rarely lets herself be defined by her past solely, and is able to have a dose of optimism about new experiences

An unhealthy Si user is Elsa from Frozen, specifically in the first movie. Throughout the movie, we not only see Elsa be defined by her past, but she gets stuck in a routine, and she is really unable to push aside this routine out of fear. She is defined by her past, and struggles with breaking out of her cycle. She believes pretty much everything she has been told her entire life, and struggles to break her specific routine, and instead, finds a new routine in the castle she built.

An example of a healthy Se user is Jasmine from Aladdin. Jasmine wants freedom and loves to explore the world around her, and while she makes in-the-moment decisions, these decisions oftentimes gets her out of trouble. She is also able to enjoy the world around her without being incredibly impulsive.

However, an example of an unhealthy Se user, would be Pepa Madrigal. Though not her fault, due to circumstances, she is constantly on fight or flight mode with her environment. She reacts to her environment in a negative way by suppressing her emotions through “clear skies” and is simply unable to react to her environment in a healthy way.

How to Apply this to Yourself & Other Characters

Learning and understanding your type takes practice. In the next two parts, I will explain how to determine your type based on these functions. Keep in mind this is a very watered down version of each function, and it takes more than reading a singular post to become aware of these functions.

This being said, it can be really hard to type yourself, because as humans, we are complex. Just because we use Fe doesn’t mean we don’t have any traits of Fi. Shadow functions, in my opinion are a bit complex to a beginner, but it does take a while to understand yourself enough to find the right type.

For the longest time, I though I was an INFP, because parts of myself that I thought were Fi were actually Ti. Also, due to stereotypes (which will be part 3), I was struggling to understand how I could be emotional and a thinker (I was like, 16 at the time), but everyone shows emotions.

So take your time to understand the functions, and eventually you’ll be able to understand yourself and your type a lot better.

[flowerandblood]

One thing I want to say I love about your writing in ‘The fall from the heavens’ is how you write Jace and Baelas relationship because not every relationship betrothed is a happy one made of love or even friendships. You’ve managed to capture that idea perfectly as they are both pretty much tolerating each other and learning how to manage a relationship since they didn’t exactly have the best examples growing up.

Jace had Rhaenyra and Laenor who was killed as a child and the fact Harwin was his real father. Jace knew his parents were never really in love and with Rhaenyra and Daemon Jace knows Daemon doesn’t treat him as a real son even when he may think so as he is a bastard and not a true Targaryen like his mother.

While Baela had to witness her parents go through the traumatic process of childbirth. We don’t know any miscarriages of Laena but Laena knew deep down she was always the second woman compared to Rhaenyra as Laena didn’t give any sons whole Rhaenyra gave birth to 5. And also Baela watched her mother on the verge of death.

Both these children had terrible parental role models in love and like I said earlier are merely trying to navigate love and relationships they will need to styay with there whole life. (Sorry for this ramble I honestly just believe you have such a poetic sense of writing that’s so extraordinary to read!)

😭😭😭😭

You don't even know how much those words mean to me! I wanted the universe of The Fall from the Heavens to be as expansive as possible, so that we actually have a look at several different sides:

1) Rheanys and Aemond, who are two children who, without even knowing it, fell in love with each other very early on. When you are a child, love and friendship seem to be the same thing, with the addition of hugs or innocent kisses. Children don't think about intimacy the way adults do, because they are not aware of it: they want to be close to each other because their gut tells them so, because they feel safe together. After Aemond loses his eye they are separated and their sense of security and their foundations are destroyed. When they see each other eight years later they are both just as tired and lonely, only for different reasons.

2) Daemon and his regret about participating in the lives of Viserys' sons despite knowing that they needed it and that perhaps it would have changed everything. He has chosen his own pride and prejudice and in his own spiteful way he tries to make amends (he upholds that Aemond and Rheanys' betrothal is in force, he does not undermine their marriage when they meet to speak, he listens to their terms even though he could just call them traitors).

3) Jace and Baela, who are two people close to each other who become betrothed and find that something is missing. This sense of discomfort causes feelings of frustration, and this tends to make us unintentionally hurt the other person, be mean and unkind to them because they are not what we deep down want. The fact that they broke off their betrothal, although painful, was a sign of their maturity and their understanding that if they got married, they would hate each other, which is something neither of them wants.

4) Alys, a bastard who has nothing and who has earned everything she has acquired on her own. She could have simply done what Larys told her to do: she could have not even tried to seduce Aemond, but simply tricked Rhaenys into thinking she did and manipulated her. Rhaenys's kindness, her honesty and innocence makes her conscience speak out, and although she doesn't have to, she makes the decision to defy him: it shows what kind of character she really is.

5) Aegon and Helaena: they live in a bit of a vacuum until their children are born and a threat to their continued existence emerges. It turns out that Aegon is able and willing to be a father who is responsible: he and his sister, guided by their well-being, grow closer, and the sense of togetherness makes Aegon a better king, a better husband, a better brother and a better man.

The truth is that all of these characters influence each other and their decisions change destiny, and I wanted the reader to feel that way when reading this story. I didn't want them to be puppets who say a sentence, appearing when the action stands to move some romantic plot forward, disappearing after a while. So, once again, thank you for this message!

[narutocharacterpolls]

personally i think both gaara and tsunade were shown being critical of the system at different points though. gaara did challenge all of the other kages at the summit over their antiquated views and hypocritical behaviour and practices (the "when did you all forsake yourselves" moment) and he seems to have changed a lot of things in suna. but I do understand your perspective too, I think I'm just sending this anyway as some kind of delayed propaganda lol.

but in the end i'm happy tsunade won bc she's very underappreciated, and I've never seen her get this high in a popularity contest before which is nice.

(i'm sorry about all the shitty messages you've been getting too. i never would have guessed a best character poll would create more drama than a worst character one 😶 )

I guess that is totally fair, he certainly does have some critiques of the system, I think they’re just less focused on and less intense/system changing in comparison to what Tsunade had spoken of (as that was a HUGE part of her character, specially pre-Hokage). The way I had remembered it though (which I could totally be misremembering, so don’t take this as fact) but I’d thought his comments during the 5 kage arc were directed solely at Oonoki, so I think that’s why it also felt of less as a critique of the kage and shinobi system in general to me. That said though, yes he certainly does have moments in which he is definitely changing the way that kage are typically upholding the system. Thanks for this perspective too! Also yes, it’s totally cool to see her get so far in a popularity contest!

Honestly I thought the same thing too, however people do tend to be a lot more passionate about their faves than about their least faves, so in hindsight I suppose I should have seen it coming lol.

[error-523scintilla]

There’s an interesting conversation here about how Latino communities are used about certain type of conservative Christian (catholic) flavor of statehood where we don’t necessarily discriminate by black vs white or of someone is “black” or “white” enough (not counting Argentina), but we DO have a problem with colorism and classism being heavily intertwined, where the darkest skin colors, and specially in men, tend to be more represented in poorer areas (only surpassed by natives, which are the ones suffering indisputable racism), while mid and lighter skin tones are in more often than not in middle class and upwards.

They seek for the “American dream” after our countries are destroyed by the US imperialism expansion and psy-ops operations, looking for places that share their “conservative” catholic values and customs they’re so used to, that they don’t understand being conservative in the USA is so, so different than in their countries. They flee the “woke” only to find out their mere existence is considered woke in those places, not being welcome. Outsiders. That’s the reality we live in.

They really need the reality wake up call. The punch. To understand they’re not considered part of them. To stop believing those places are just like our countries. They hate us. White USAmericans hate us, no matter how many traditional opinions or believes you may share with them.

Latinos and black people suffer under the same nationalistic white supremacy. And they don’t understand it, as it has probably never happened to them before from where they come. They’re brothers and sisters under the same oppression.

While this does not excuse their behavior nor endorses it, I do hope this explains a little where their mindset comes from. How they don’t get that their actions uphold white supremacy until it punches them in the face.

nah nah nah. y'all wanted to be white so bad, stay there with them and EAT THAT RACISM smfh

[barrackbvnny]

──꒰ 💫  𝗥𝗨𝗟𝗘𝗦 // 𝗔𝗕𝗢𝗨𝗧 // 𝗩𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗨𝗦 ꒱

        ↬  18+ only (minors DNI)         ↬  in character rp and ask blog        ↬  semi-selective        ↬  coffin mun // they/them         ↬  oc & canon friendly         ↬ interest tracker         

↬ blog role: main / ooc. @lost-padawan. @blyzeofglory. @fae-blaze. @vanserv-flower.

──꒰ 🪐  𝑪𝑯𝑨𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑺 ꒱

──꒰ BRIOOLA ꒱    🐰  ・・・・        ❛        SHE / HER   ⠀❜

       ・・・・        ❛        24 // 5’4” // pansexual, demiromantic   ⠀❜        ・・・・        ❛        playlist   ⠀❜ A sex worker who is paid by the republic to help keep clone troopers happy and complacent in their service to the republic. Rio is a barrack bunny, again, paid by the republic, with her specific barracks being the Alpha Arcs barracks. But she is never to turn a clone trooper down when approached. Most Alpha Arcs call her Bunny, or Leralt’ika. Whereas some call her Rio. During roleplays she will either be on Kamino or Coruscant.

──꒰ CIVET ꒱    ⚠️   ・・・・        ❛        THEY / IT   ⠀❜

       ・・・・        ❛        26 // 6'2" // unknown   ⠀❜        ・・・・        ❛        playlist   ⠀❜ With an unusual way of meeting the clones on kamino, Civet was originally seen as a threat. Civet is trained in combat from their father, with a heavy knowledge of technology, how it works and easy ways to get into systems. They have cyborg parts to them, with their right side of their face being disfigured there is now a metal plate covering their face. They've also lost their left arm, up to their shoulder.

──꒰ PYROMANIA ꒱    ���   ・・・・        ❛        SHE / THEY  ⠀❜

       ・・・・        ❛        26  //  5'7”  //   demisexual, biromantic   ⠀❜        ・・・・        ❛        playlist   ⠀❜ Pyro is by far one of the most monotone people you’ll ever meet in the galaxy. The numbness and pure genuine ‘i don’t give a shit’ attitude is one of the most deturbing things about her. Having grown up in slavery, she spent a good portion of her life doing as she was told. So, she has a very large distrust and disdain for authority. She doesn’t uphold any rules and commonly goes out of her way to break the rules. Despite her attitude so to speak, she is very intelligent and often likes to make others feel dumb. She gets flustered when people outsmart her. Her job however requires a lot of focus, so she’s good at tuning people out. As a pyrotechnic, bomb, and toxins expert, she knows a lot about certain chemicals and is incredibly good at chemistry and understanding the different chemicals of different planets. 

──꒰ REZLAZZULA ꒱    🔥   ・・・・        ❛        SHE / HER  ⠀❜

       ・・・・        ❛        23  //  6'4”  //   pansexual, panromantic   ⠀❜        ・・・・        ❛        playlist   ⠀❜ lasat are known for their aggressive and warrior esc behavior. often seen as aggressive and intense from outsiders. their traditions and towards outsiders of their planet tend to make most in the galaxy see them as hostile and violent. with the species slowly falling into obscurity and almost extinction as slowly more and more became enslaved, murdered and harmed in other ways. now very little are left across the galaxy. with most being trophies for the rich, or slaves. 

──꒰ 🪐  𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺 ꒱

[dianneking]

I’ve been talking to a married woman. but I don’t like her like that. She’s just very attractive and I really like her and she’s very into me. And she’s so interesting as a person.

I know it’s wrong, and I don’t want a relationship with someone that older than me either.

but, I can’t seem to like girls my age the same, I’ve been on endless dates already this year, and they never work at the end, because I’m not interested. 🧍🏻‍♀️ I don’t know what to do. I’m genuinely concerned. 🧍🏻‍♀️

🧚🏻‍♀️

Ouuuh that's a tough situation to be in, that's for sure. I have a lot of feelings on the things you wrote there, so beware, there's gonna be a lot of words under the cut (hence the fact that I put in a cut to start with). I hope they can be of help, or at least of comfort. My askbox is always open for this sort of asks by the way. If my experiences can help in any way, I am glad.

The first and most important thing is that it's okay to not be attracted (romantically or physically) to people you like, or to be attracted to them and not interested in pursuing a relationship with them, or to be interested in them in a purely platonic way. All (and many more!) are valid human interactions which are not inherently better or worse.

Attraction is a very whimsical and personal and changing feeling. It is often not something we can control, and it often disregards what we would like it to do (I think a lot of people, me included, have experienced at least once attraction for someone they knew it was a bad idea to be attracted to). And sometimes we really like a person and would love to be attracted to them (physically, romantically, doesn't really matter how) and the attraction is nowhere to be found! (So frustrating ugh)

It feels to me that you are putting a lot of pression and rules upon yourself (you can of course tell me I'm dead wrong and to just shut tf up). Maybe all of those failed dates are not necessarily concerning, it's just that you want a connection with who you date that you cannot find in people your own age. That can happen. Older women tend to have (big generalization here, sorry) a different worldview and different priorities with respect to younger people who are maybe still finding their footing in the world. They also tend to be more sure of themselves and that is simply hot.

That being said, if you are not interested in a relationship with that woman, it might be better to communicate that in some way or another, so you can maybe shift the interaction to a more friendly territory instead. Even if I am the first to admit that the rush of an attractive person flirting with you is very pleasant even if you're not interested in pursuing anything with them. But it can be a slippery slope and lead you to unpleasant situations and in most cases, not worth it (ask me how I know - actually no, please don't)

Maybe what you would need to find is someone slightly older than you but younger than this woman you're talking to? Maybe try to understand (if you can, it's not always that easy) what was missing from those other girls you've dated that made you say "nah, this one's not the one for me". That could help you avoid going on doomed dates, if that's something that puts more pressure on yourself in the end.

As I said before, I hope this helped at least somewhat, my askbox is open if you need any sort of advice, and so are my dms of course. Always remember that you are valid and beautiful.

PS - You might have noticed I have not touched on the fact that she's married. That is a moral issue, and as such, a deeply personal topic that you need to face on your own. The only personal opinion I will share on that can of worms is - no, it is not your responsibility as a person outside a marriage to uphold the promise of exclusivity they built in the contract they signed. If someone cheats on their spouse with you, they are the cheater and that's on them.

[jdgo51]

A Prayer for Moms Today's inspiration comes from: Jesus Calling for Moms by Sarah Young Compassionate Lord Jesus, "'I ask You to use these devotions to bless and help mothers — strengthening, encouraging, and comforting them as they go about their daily lives. Remind them that You are with them each and every moment, regardless of what is happening. Please shower them with Your unfailing Love, and enable them to love their children well. Help their children truly know You as Savior and Lord. In Your glorious, victorious Name, Amen ~ Sarah Young I want you to learn a new habit. Try saying, “I trust You, Jesus,” in response to whatever happens to you. If there is time, think about who I am in all My Power and Glory; ponder also the depth and breadth of My Love for you. This simple practice will help you see Me in every situation, acknowledging My sovereign control over the universe. When you view events from this perspective — through the Light of My universal Presence — fear loses its grip on you. Adverse circumstances become growth opportunities when you affirm your trust in Me no matter what. You receive blessings gratefully, realizing they flow directly from My hand of grace. Your continual assertion of trusting Me will strengthen our relationship and keep you close to Me. I have seen You in the sanctuary and beheld Your power and Your glory. — Psalm 63:2 See, the Sovereign Lord comes with power, and His arm rules for Him. See, His reward is with Him, and His recompense accompanies Him. He tends His flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart; He gently leads those that have young. — Isaiah 40:10–11 Where can I go from Your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence? If I go up to the heavens, You are there; if I make my bed in the depths, You are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there Your hand will guide me, Your right hand will hold me fast. — Psalm 139:7–10 “I trust You, Jesus; help me, Holy Spirit.” Trust Me in times of confusion — when things don’t make sense and nothing you do seems to help. This type of trust delights Me because I know it is real. Invite Me to enter into your struggles — to be ever so close to you. Though other people may not really understand what you’re going through, I understand perfectly. Find comfort in knowing you’re not alone in your struggles. I am with you, watching over you continually. Long-term trials can drain you of energy and hope, making it hard for you to keep trusting Me. But I have given you a wonderful Helper, the Holy Spirit, who never runs out of strength. You can ask for His help, praying: “I trust You, Jesus; help me, Holy Spirit.” Instead of trying to resolve all your problems, simply rest in My Presence. Trust that there is a way forward, even though you can’t yet see it. I am providing a good way for you, though it is bumpy at times. When the road is rough, cling all the more tightly to Me. As your soul clings to Me, My right hand upholds you. I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you. — Genesis 28:15 When the Helper comes, whom I shall send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify of Me. — John 15:26 NKJV My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me. — Psalm 63:8"' Excerpted with permission from Jesus Calling for Moms by Sarah Young, copyright Sarah Young.

[utaoutauhito]

adding some of op's tags (I have cut them down so I recommend going through the notes on this post to read them in full)

#because i do see this idea that westerners have of women of color who face systemic oppression #who only seem to sympathise with them if their stories and personhood is palatable to a western audience

#there’s a lot to talk about about akio as a brown man who progresses in a eurocentic society (ohtori is in japan ofc but it takes heavy #influence from European culture and of course its a country where akio is a part of the minority in because he’s s brown man #another person pointed out that akio uses underhanded methods and is engaged to a woman of high social standing #in order to raise in ranks and reach his own position) #through the exploitation of a brown woman #and how race isolates akio and anthy with anthy’s bullying and hatred having that racial element—the way she’s dehumanised and slandered

#so utena explores what it’s like to love your abuser and not seeing any life outside of them #but when you consider anthy’s role as a brown woman #it’s taken a step further

#anthy’s not just a victim who loves her abuser. she knows her abuser in a way that others cannot because of their shared experience

#regarding race. other characters hold a privilege that akio and anthy do not so it will even feel a bit absurd for them to comment on #akio’s actions esp in regards to anthy because they don’t have that experience with race. they had privilege where anthy and akio did not #ofc this doesn’t change the fact that akio is an abuser. not just to anthy but to the students in ohtori. he is the main facilitator and #the physical manifestation of patriarchy

I want to add to all of this that generally speaking in Japanese media, female characters will tend to be lighter-skinned than male characters. if you eyedrop two characters from the same series, one male one female, with similar circumstances, backgrounds, personality tropes, etc, almost always the female character will be paler.

so I think the decision to make Akio paler than Anthy in RGU was probably deliberate.

Akio has the benefit over Anthy of being a man, but a dark-skinned man can be viewed as 'dangerous.' The other characters in RGU don't view Akio with suspicion. Being lighter-skinned, being a little less 'foreign' in his appearance relative to Anthy, may give him some access to being viewed more easily by the people around him as non-threatening, desirable, competent. He can be trusted, respected, permitted to marry a woman of the dominant race. This almost-acceptance can lead to the illusion that if he performs patriarchy well enough, if he upholds the system well enough, if he pushes the people below him down far enough, he can leverage the system to his own advantage and he can attain all the power and privileges of a man of the dominant race. (But this is not true--Akio's standing would always be incomplete and tenuous, he will never cease to be 'other,' and it feels as though Anthy understands this more than anyone.)

A lot of people talk about how Utena explores abuse through Anthy, and how she is not a perfect victim, she plays role in perpetuating the system that is built upon her oppression, facilitating her own abuse. But I’ve never seen anyone talk about the role race plays and the implications it has. Utena deconstructs the idea of a perfect victim and what it means to be ‘worthy’ to be saved from abuse and harm, but Anthy’s role as a brown woman who is being abused by a brown man adds a layer to her story and I think it’s extremely important and relevant to discuss

[syntiment]

Man I’m gonna start taking Nancy Wheeler rights from a good chunk of y’all... You people treat this girl like garbage. She ain’t a villain in ST, she’s like, a regular teenage (for most of the series) girl who went through significant trauma, is coping badly with it, and who’s greatest sins according to y’all are- *checks notes* dating Steve and the relationship not going well, having a complicated relationship with her brother, and being an independent female character who stands her ground and is pretty emotionally stunted from the trauma she’s been bottling the whole series long.

Nancy is a really nuanced character with a lot of layers you aren’t supposed to be able to peel away from a first glance, a huge part of her character is upholding expectations of her and hiding her problems because the girl’s never had the healthy space to unpack all of the really awful terrifying shit she’s been through. A well put together girl who’s actually got her shit together (in the 80′s) doesn’t sleep with guns in her closet. 

She went through a severely traumatic loss that she blames herself for, lest people forget, it’s canon that she spent a YEAR visiting Barb’s parents and spending dinners with them after her death, because the girl has a guilt complex so deep it’s actually heartbreaking. And also discovering that the regular world she thought she knew is actually full of real actual monsters and another dimension. Yeah, her relationship with Steve fell apart during that, it’s very difficult to maintain a healthy relationship with all of that on your plate. They were both teenagers who sucked at managing it.

Her and Mike have the same sibling squabbling that you see in a lot of places and as we’ve been shown in canon when they’re both not performing the classic Wheeler Family Bottling-up-all-your-feelings schtick, they clearly care about each other a lot and Nancy does a lot of little things to try and look out for Mike where she can. But neither of them want the other (or anyone else) to worry about them so they don’t talk about what’s going on with them. And that tends to translate as them seeming distant. (They both struggle to open up about what’s going on with them unless under duress, we have so many instances of both of them doing this through the show.)

God forbid she be a girl through her teens with some self-respect and who despite the shit she’s been through, wants to make something of her life and be able to stand on her own two feet. She’s got issues like anyone in that show has issues, they are all meant to be portrayed as realistic people with both good and bad traits that make them understandable and relatable. People’s expectations of Nancy to be some kind of perfect girlfriend ideal big sister saint is a really weird wash of her character. 

[punkpandapatrixk]

☆°・. You’re Procrastinating Because You’re in Pain .・°☆ | Punk Girl Culture

I think a lot of Humans are prone to procrastination because they’ve been put up against all kinds of agreement that have caused them a lot of mental anguish. It’s not like such people are lazy, undependable, or bad in any way; it’s that people procrastinate because they’re delaying pain. That as much as possible, for as long as possible, they’d like to postpone the advent of emotional anguish (and mental distress, I guess) that’s become a one-package with the activity or task they’re avoiding doing.

Yo, there’s an entire science on this, babe. Call it avoidance or pain association or something—I’m not a licensed psychologist, but I know somebody on YouTube has explained this at great length. It’s a topic on insomnia… and how some people unconsciously associate the bed they sleep on with the stress of trying to get to sleep. The way I see it, it’s like such people can’t fall asleep instead because they’re delaying facing the psychological pains that have become associated with trying to rest itself.

I think if you’re someone who’s tried your best at many things and then met with disappointments, over and over again, it’s only natural that eventually enough, you want to avoid facing anything remotely reminiscent of the events you got your heart broken. And so you procrastinate, and you postpone, and you’d rather work hard at scrolling through memes and watching cat videos because they give you a rush of positive feelings—even if only momentarily. So it’s like taking drugs because you’re miserable as fuck. Those escapist activities, I mean; they’re like drugs that way.

And if you were never made aware of procrastination and its association with pain, for just as long you’d think of yourself as just capricious and lazy. I think when people are hurting they tend to behave bizarrely because they are too deep in sorrow which they can’t make conscious themselves. I don’t think it’s their fault entirely. I think it’s their society that’s behaved badly by imposing terms and agreements and conditions that are utterly insulting the complexity of the human condition.

There are duties and responsibilities which people can’t simply take a respite from, and from which running away would only cause a greater deal of hardships. I mean, upon closer inspection, a lot of Humans are really so hopeless! Though they’re hurting so much on all psychological and spiritual levels, nobody is there to give them an understanding and although they’re in grave need of a ‘long vacation’, delaying working on their duties would only result in all kinds of degrading experiences that would make such an individual even sadder!

There are bills to pay and deadlines to meet and failure to uphold those very important things results in punishments and segregation and humiliation… Nobody likes dealing with activities and interactions that cause them so much despondency. Without being able to realise such a pattern, suddenly no oneremembered how their worldly dealings and impossible T&C gave everyone a frightful hell on Earth.

Hmph! What blasphemous behaviour! It is blasphemous to the sheer dignity of being alive! Indignatio~!

Us Faes aren’t really comprehending this whole procrastination concept, really… We don’t procrastinate whatsoever. That’s all.

After all, everything we do is fun for us and it’s quite obvious that there’s no need for delaying fun activities. So, we don’t procrastinate. When a Fae is sad and gloomy, it would not bother with tending to obligations. Rather, such a Fae would go to a place it can find peace and calm, and stay there until it feels better. All Faes know how to do this without being taught because it is what’s natural to us. Everybody does it like that anyway. But Humans are funny because unless someone points this out, they fail to notice that they’re procrastinating because they’re in pain.

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

🍃🪨🍄🧚🏻‍♂️

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