#i will do more later im just too tired rn...
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emotaeyongie · 8 hours ago
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"Will you join me?"
Mark lee x fem!reader
Genre: a little hurt/a lot of comfort
Warnings: nudity (non-sexual), angst (not too much) kissing (literally once), pet names (honey, baby)
Word count: 549
A/n: my first actual fic! lmk what you guys think! im working on more fics besides texting ones rn (can't guarantee they'll be out anytime soon tho)
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For once, you made it home from work after Mark. Mark was sitting on your shared couch when you trudged in. You were exhausted. Mark looked up from his phone and saw your tired state.
"Hey honey, I didn't think you were working so late tonight. What happened?" Mark asked, trying his best to be gentle with you.
"I'm sorry, I should've texted you about it. I didn't want to work late, but everyone else in my section asked to leave early- so I had to stay late and do all their work too." You sighed, dropping your purse to the floor, feeling a small weight lifted off your shoulders.
"It's okay, baby. You don't need to apologize for something like that. Here-" He motioned for you to sit down, "Let me help." Mark smiled.
As you sat down on the couch, Mark helped you slip out of your shoes and placed them by the door before coming back to you. "I made some food about an hour ago, I can heat it up for you. Did you want some?"
You silently nodded, smiling at his request. Mark got up, quickly preparing the dish he made earlier for you. He walked back over to you a couple minutes later, handing you a plate and some utensils. The two of you sat in a comfortable silence as you ate. Once you finished your meal, Mark cleaned up after you. "How about I run you a bath and we get ready for bed, yeah? I can tell you're exhausted, baby."
"Please," You yawned.
The two of you made it to your shared bedroom as Mark turned on the water for a bath for you. Once the bath was full, Mark walked back to you, leading you into your bathroom as he helped you out of your clothes. As you got into the tub, the warm water instantly calmed your nerves. Mark had moved your dirty clothes to the laundry, going to grab some pajamas for you to wear after.
"Mark, baby? Will you join me?" You asked.
Mark smiled as he looked back to you, "Sure, baby."
Mark stripped and tossed his clothes to the side, moving to get in behind you in the bath. His warm arms quickly enveloped your smaller frame as the two of you laid in the tub; relaxing. You leaned against Mark's back as you both soaked in the water.
"Thank you Mark, this is really nice." You whispered.
"You're welcome, baby. I just wanted to take care of you. You're always busy taking care of me, I'm glad I finally got to return the favor." Mark smiled, lightly stroking your arm.
As the water began to get cold, the two of you made your way out. You changed into your pajamas for the night as Mark did the same. The two of you got into your shared bed and you quickly curled up to Mark's side. Although you had a long day, Mark always knew how to make your nights better. You quickly drifted off to sleep, the sound of Mark's heartbeat lulling you to sleep. Mark lightly kissed your head as he saw your now relaxed figure, quietly sleeping.
"Goodnight baby, I love you." He whispered, slowly falling asleep with you in his arms.
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mellohiizz · 6 months ago
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finally managed to finish this. i forgot how fun it is to draw pretty girls, so here's some more genderbend ls designs :3 they're a little rushed, but i still like them.
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bunnyboy-juice · 4 months ago
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;~; (tags vent)
#i feel so lonely and i dont know how to fix it#im trying to engage with people. im trying ot take space. im trying but nothing is helping#and like im hormonal so i wanna cry about it today#and like this loneliness isnt for one reason only#there's no One Thing#but so so many things making me feel like i cant connect#and even wiht making progress and even with coping and even with reminidng myself its okay to just feel bad sometimes like#i want company. i dont want online company i want irl company. i want friends. and im so miserable about the fact that i struggle to#make irl friends - not bc im not a good friend!! honestly tehre's been plenty of opportunities for me to make friends is the worst part#between work; disabilities; energy; and like interests/things to talk about its really hard to make friends (and tbh the first three-#really are the biggest drains). and i love my online friends i do i jsut. miss them all so much when i talk too much and then it hurts more#and i lost a friend group recently so im feelng really out of place#nearly everyday for the last idk. 5 months i had a group of people going “hey. love you” (even if they didnt say it verbatim daily) and lik#im so sad! and the feelings are coming out today ig cause i havenothing to do at work so im just. here#but yeah - ik part of this grief im experiencing is YET AGAIN experiencing change and loss re:friendships bc of things largely out of my#control /: and every time this happens it just brings up every single wound#im talking with my therapist about it too i just. wish friends were more permanent in my life yk?#or at least that i had friends irl still /: but all my deepest connections are all So far away#and it hurts so much to miss ppl rn im just. isolating myself#but i dont awnt to TALK. i dont want to TEXT. i dont want to hang out on a vc. i awnt to be held and loved and just talked to about anythin#other than the stresses in peoples lives. i want people to infodump to me w/o me having to Beg or Engage Correctly#i want people to tell me about themselves. jsut fucking lore dump in my inbox. its not dumping. i dont care about trauma dumping. if you do#cw i guess i jsut. im so tired. im tired of the “haiiiiii love you!!!!!” i have to do over the keyboard to have social connections#im tired of being so disabled i cant make friends bc no one wants to be friends w/ me irl and all the reasons (“ur a flake” “u cancel plans#“u never want to go out” “u never have energy” “why do you disappear when you need to recharge it makes me feel bad?” etc etc etc) all#relate to me being disabled and like.i feel like the problem. my existence is a problem. and the worst part is all iwant to do is just.#go run errands with someone. do important tasks &get a little treat to celebrate after. go to the doctor. the hospital. wherever im allowed#i want ot be a PERSON#): i jsut miss my friends#and liek im going to a thing later this month to try and make friends irl even if its just exercise friends
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phagodyke · 1 year ago
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okay can we have a new rule that if you're my friend and know I struggle with rsd from adhd + you're planning on hanging out with mutual friends but specifically aren't inviting me for whatever reason. Maybe Don't Tell Me About It
#id just rather not know man. even if I cant go or dont particularly want to im going to get stung by it and it rly sucks#its a TON of extra effort i have to put in to emotionally navigate that information without overreacting and making it an issue#wait actually maybe i do need to sit down with her and explain this more explicitly. bc she probably doesnt rly know abt it#even tho ive mentioned it shes rly terrible at reading ppl and i probably dont let on much abt it anyway bc im used to dealing w it#ugh. but also its rly embarrassing to talk abt and ill have to tread so carefully to make sure it doesnt get misinterpreted. hmm#but itd be worth it if she stopped so. ill give it some thought#it makes me feel so unreal sometimes bc i cant always tell if im justifiably upset or if im 'just overreacting' so i assume the latter-#most of the time to give myself space to work thru the emotion and minimise the damage i might cause if i AM just overreacting#but then sometimes later on i realise that it was justified but its too late to bring it back up and anyway ive worked through it#and idk. theres smth self disrespectful abt it all im tired of making space all the time and never taking any up myself#im not THAT upset rn like this is a v minor thing but still. might be time to start nipping this stuff in the bud#aaanyway#im procrastinating eating bc i cooked a nice meal but now im not in the mood to eat it 😭😭 but i gotta fuel up.....#ill find smth to watch hopefully thatll do the trick#yawns so loud bye for now#.diaries
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oops-its-a-fanwork · 11 months ago
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Just got a notification for 500 likes! Thank you for all who leave a little like, and especially thank you to those who leave tags or comments! It's nice to see people enjoying what I make :)💖 I will start scheduling some reblogs at some point, since I do not have any finished new posts. I am working on some things though! just very slowly due to other things in my life ;)
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roses-and-tears · 1 year ago
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#I have spent. 8 almost 9 hours resetting my laptop. I chose the option to keep all my files but uninstall apps. and it has been restarting#and installing for almost 9 hours. yeah I get that the process will be long. but ffs#I have been bored the past few hours so I watched the smile movie bc I got reminded of it yesterday#it was pretty bad. the couple gorey scenes towards the end were nice but some of the acting and writing was just terrible#I was also hoping the movie would’ve taken a different turn. I think it would’ve made it more.. idk. I can’t think of the right term.-#-it just would’ve made it better I think.#I’ve also eaten a lot today. more than I usually do. more than I have in months and years and im upset about that. im already bloated.#I hope I don’t work tomorrow. I have to call in in the morning to check. and I don’t mind working but rn I just kind of want to spend the#day relaxing#I’ve spent almost 9 hours on this resetting part. and 4 extra hours trying to simply repair it in restarts#I also need to clean up my room. a lot of it. and clean my pets cage. it’s ant season now and im really stressed about that#the smell of sharpie returns and I am just. overwhelmed. I have 3 days to prepare for my special week long activity and im not happy about-#-that.#I also had some feelings earlier that im stressed over too.#im being vague about that bc i just don’t want to go off about that to everyone#im tired and overwhelmed i just want my laptop to finish resetting so i can stop fretting about this. i want to sleep#im tired. of so much#to delete later
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claratwelve · 1 year ago
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yeah no okay i just finished s13 and i loved it, that was some good cinema
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clementine-png · 1 year ago
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Tag rambling ignore me
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antarcticajoy · 1 year ago
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you know what I'd love? If someone would just choose me for once
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coridallasmultipass · 1 month ago
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#im gonna cry i went thru my back injury log diary journal note thing#i wrote out the important parts so i have a paper version with me for my appointment w the back specialist tomorrow#and im just so fucking scared man i dont want to have my back pressed on its gonna hurt so fucking badly getting prodded tmr#especially after the long car ride there#and i really dont want to be awake rn im so fucking scared but i still have to do my pt exercises tonight but like#fuck im scared i have no idea what the treatment is gonna be or if the doctor is gonna be mean#ive started seeing just a tiny bit of improvement over the last week but its so fucking marginal but its like#its a fact of life that im gonna hurt after my appointment#like hshahdjshks im panicking now lol fuck i dont want to do this#ive been waiting basically since MAY.#i dont want to be sober rn man i cant take anxiety pills this late bc i need sleeping meds more but im so fucking scared#i just wanna be able to sleep and not think about appointments#its fucking cold in my room too so all my whole body hurts rn i wanna get in bed but i HAVE to do the pt exercises#especially bc of the slight improvement like okay maybe the small exercises were what i needed#sucks that it takes an hour to do them all like im fucking freezing rn#just fuckk man#its been months of trauma so tomorrow is important and i dont want the months of waiting to be for nothing#im still in a lot of fucking pain rn too ofc but like im scared more rn#when am i gonna be able to relax#like genuinely relax#its like a whole struggle just to do the functions that keep me alive#im so fucking tired of everything#i know im prob gonna start panicking in the doctors office and not be able to voice my words#its so fucking hard to talk about how traumatic this whole year has been for me#it started w endo in january 2nd and then everything else after sucked lmao like ugh fuck theres too much weighing on the appointment tmr#delete later / /#personal / /#ShitPost.exe#medical / /
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gazeboarcade · 7 months ago
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:^[
#i started my new job on monday#and its rlly rlly hard#all i can think the last couple days is im not cut out for it#and that i made a mistake by agreeing to it and possibly to my degree as a whole#i haven't been able to sit down for more than 5 minutes the whole shift#which i am not dumb shouldnt be so hard but im also fat rn so that does make my feet hurt so bad its lowkey all i can feel physically#and i get asked like . 100+ questions a day (i do not even think that's exaggerating)#and its a LOT to learn all this new stuff about all these new clients and like . they have rlly high needs so its important that like#if no one else understands at least i do bc im like. their point person#and im qualified to do the job. if not more so than all my coworkers : /#but i have left each day barely even understanding everything that happened that day. It FLIES by because there is not a dull moment#and when there is so far its been actually a Problem i need to address making it dull that i am not immediately aware of#im sure itll even out in the coming days but like : ((((((( this is VERY hard for me and i feel like i cant convey that well#bc logically i should be good at it so i must just be being dramatic or smthn idk#and i feel like i cant talk to my friends lately bc idk that feels rlly hard#but its not like i rlly have the time to its just rlly sad#im up too late but im not even tired enough to sleep im just really sad and overwhelmed and i wish i could just like . explode briefly#just till its over or normal#fucking. wretched man idk like its jjust a lot : ((((((#i wish i could communicate that effectively so the bigness of it would come across#delete later
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keyotos · 2 years ago
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he does it so well
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summary ⎯ hot things they do.
includes ⎯ dan heng, gepard, blade, sampo, & jing yuan.
tana's words ⎯ struggling with writing requests rn so i wrote something short to clear writer's block. im sorry guys i'll get to them soon i promise 😭
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dan heng
⎯ waits for you before turning the page on a book. he notices that you are reading along with him and waits for you to signal that you're ready before carrying on.
⎯ private > public. he will brush your hand in public but he will be all over you in private. instead of only brushing your hand, dan heng will be brushing up on you. more touchy in private than in public.
⎯ pushes the hair out of your face when it's getting in your way. but he does it in a more sensual way. his fingers graze your lips as he agonizingly drags his hand through your hair.
⎯ long day? melts into your body at night. runs his hands up and down your arms as a way to relieve stress?? leans his head into your neck and sighs so dreamily??? like hello?? lips grazing your neck???
⎯ hot morning voice. raspy and rough. also kind of scratchy. when he tells you, "five more minutes," how could you say no to THAT voice? he knows of this effect and makes sure to use it to his full advantage
⎯ very observant. knows everything you like; knows your routines; knows you. he's the first to compliment you if you got a haircut or new outfit/nails/whatever. it always make you blush bc how is he always the first one to figure these things out?!?@#$%
⎯ gets jealous a little too easily. doesn't do anything verbal about it. opts for being a little more touchy than usual. he thinks it's embarrassing and he wants to hide his face into his pillow when you tease him about it.
⎯ lip biter. not when y'all are kissing, but when he tries to hide his smile or his laugh he bites his lip. you find it so cute and you just want to grab him and just connect your lips with his.
⎯ nerd. hot sexy nerd. he'll tell you about animals and mitosis and python and he's just so intelligent. helps you with problem solving things (probably puzzles idk) and he stands/leans over you with his breath dancing on the back of your neck.
⎯ jawline kisser. if he wants something from you he gives chaste kisses to your jawline. he does that when he's bored too ig. very big on jaw kisses and secretly loves when you flush because of them.
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gepard
⎯ blushes when you compliment him. he looks so adorable you just wanna pinch his cheeks and smother him. he gets even more embarrassed
⎯ big domestic guy. ntm on casual stuff or situationships. if he wants you, he'll let you know (even if he's blushing his way through it).
⎯ he is not shy. in the beginning he might be a little shy, but later on the relationship he'll get bolder. chaste kisses on the lips becomes long make-out sessions on his bed after a rather tiring day on the front lines. and if he hasn't seen you in a while... i will let you guys interpret.
⎯ leans down to listen to you. he's literally gigantic and when he LEANS DOWN just to hear what you say... and it's so innocent too but the way you look up at him doesn't make it so innocent anymore...
⎯ pins you to the wall on accident. may or may not be inspired by teenage dream. anyway, he does a lot of hot things on accident and doesn't even realize it. so you are trying not to explode while gepard is enjoying his merry day while caging you underneath him.
⎯ acts like a knight since u always make jokes that he's your "knight in shining armor." so dedicated that he kisses your knuckles out of nowhere and it makes you want to FAINT. like you could be reading and (out of nowhere) he takes your hand away from your book and kisses ur knuckles. AND HE HOLDS EYE CONTACT WHILE DOING IT.
⎯ flirty without knowing it. says something cute and flirty but doesn't realize it until you say something. and he says it so calmly too; like drops it into a convo
⎯ runs a hand through your hair before you two sleep. he just wants to keep you close and he just wants to feel you because he never gets to come home often.
⎯ ROLLS UP. HIS SLEEVES. TO HIS FOREARMS. he does this when he's particularly stressed. like come here i can show you a way to destress (i'm so sorry).
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blade
⎯ he's only shirtless when YOU are around. he trusts you enough to show all of himself around you. you are reliable and trustworthy enough to be able to know the entirety of him: his body, his mind, his past, etc.
⎯ intensely loyal to you. like if he had to choose between the world and you he would obviously choose you. would do anything for you, would buy anything for you, would steal anything for you: you guys get the gist.
⎯ he's so loving only towards you. silver wolf and kafka like to tease him for it (especially silver wolf... bc how can he play a game with you and not her). he does little things for you, like picking lint off of your outfit or pulling your hair back when you're eating something. or pulling your hair back when you're doing something...
⎯ LOVES when you wear his clothing. his shirt his jacket ANYTHING. whatever it is, he will be going crazy for it. has a thing for when you wear his shirts; you just look so good and you're wearing something that's HIS. not anyone else's; HIS SHIRT.
⎯ has a little possessive streak. it's not a weird and overprotective possessive thing tho. more so, "no silver wolf you are not going to force them to play games with you." maybe it's more overprotective than possessive, but secretly he wants you all to himself and he does NOT want to share.
⎯ speaking of being overprotective, he is also just regular protective. he walks on the side near the road so you don't have to. he grabs your arm to pull you away from something dangerous. he shields you so he'll get hit before you. yk, cute stuff like that. your safety is his priority, no matter what.
⎯ he is the type to be like, "who did this to you??" and he WILL be hunting that person down. but not without urgently caring for you first.
⎯ his touch is so filled with emotion, genuineness, earnestness, and sincere. i hc that blade doesn't have much relationship experience and he isn't very wordy, so when he hugs you or touches you, all of his emotions are poured into his hands/fingers/etc. all of what he feels for you (which is very much) is shown in his physical touch.
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sampo
⎯ MANSPREADS. i said it. HE IS A MANSPREADER. elbows resting on top of his knees as he says something super coy or flirty towards you, and sometimes you even have to PHYSICALLY avert your eyes away.
⎯ a tease. if you lean in for a kiss, he'll lean backwards. if he's missing you, his fingertips will dance along the bare skin of your sides, and then he'll pull away to make you want him as much as he wants you. he is so INFURIATING.
⎯ if he flusters you and you blush n try to cover your face with something (literally anything), he'll grab whatever you're holding so he could see your face. to him, you look the prettiest when you're smiley and flustered, such as in those situations.
⎯ if you're going on a long tangent about something, he'll kiss you on your lips randomly. he doesn't mind your rambling, he thinks it's adorable, which is why he does it. it always leaves you with your jaw dropped before you could continue what you were saying.
⎯ the type to lock himself in a closet with you but on accident. you guys don't know how you two even got into that situation, but sampo is with you, so he couldn't be happier. big quality time guy.
⎯ brings you little trinkets or gifts based on his "business" adventures. whenever he sees something, he gets it for you. his mind is usually racing about you anyway, so he can't help himself when he develops a spending problem because of you
⎯ sings with you to songs. you could be singing in the shower and then you hear this agitating, grating voice. he's a terrible singer, but he'll do anything as long as you're there with him, so he sings with you anyway.
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jing yuan
⎯ wakes up and the first thing he does is admire you. he studies every single one of your facial features, acting as if he's never seen them before when he wakes up to your face every day. he finds beauty all around you: in your sleeping face, on the bridge of your nose, the pout of your lips when you're asleep. he just loves all of you.
⎯ a flirt and PROUD. he's bold with his quips. not afraid of initiating affection in public but he prefers private which i think is much sexier.
⎯ neck kisser. heavy on neck kisses (especially in the morning). practically an entire body kisser tbh. he can't get enough of you, and in a world where loneliness strives (immortality), he's grateful that he has you for the time being.
⎯ grabs your chin and tilts your head up if he wants you. he doesn't do it forcefully, more like a gentle smush. he locks eyes with you and omfg it makes your heart beat sm. like why are you looking at me LIKE THAT. so sensually or whateva....
⎯ urges you to come closer to him so he can whisper something in your ear. when do you come closer to him, he pulls you by the waist and gets super close to your ear. like lips brushing your ear. and he blows a raspberry in it. so stupid but too lovable.
⎯ lies down in your lap if you two are lounging together. since he's so busy, he doesn't get to lounge around often, so he likes to be as close to you as possible.
⎯ if he wants to kiss you, you will know. not because he'll tell you. but because of the specific LOOK he gives you. his eyes are narrowed under the spell of seduction, focusing only on your lips. his mouth is slightly parted like he is ready to kiss you, and the way he tilts his head down...
⎯ patient for you. will wait for you even when he is dying to feel you once again. he has to deal with yanqing so he holds a lot of patience. but he won't rush you with anything, lets you move at your own pace, and gives you help if needed. overall sweet guy.
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i hope this motivates me into finishing my requests
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yrieso · 2 years ago
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tonight i am thinking about how it really pisses me off when i tell people my dads deaf and a lot of people's immediate response is "im sorry" like bitch i said he's deaf not DEAD why do you feel the need to say im sorry. like really, why do you think you should apologize for that? huh?
#it's just. hmmm urg. it's infuriating!!!!#next time someone says that im gonna say ''and im sorry yours is brunette. you see hoe stupid that sounds? that's how stop YOU sound rn''#like idk it might be different if he went deaf later in life but my dad went deaf when he was 4 months old so it's not like#i've had the experience of having a hearing dad and suddenly i don't??? it's literally been my whole life AND his whole life too#im too tired to really articulated my thoughts on this but i feel like i shouldn't really have to explain#why it's so stupid and frustrating to me when you tell me you're sorry my dad is deaf right after learning that#my dad being deaf has had almost 0 negative impact on my life and it's actually given me a lot of cool things#like i wouldn't have learned sign language if he were hearing!! do u know how cool it is to#know a whole other LANGUAGE with your parents and how good it feels to flex that you know more than#your siblings bc they only know the basics of asl#because it feels SO GOOD to flex that#i get to watch tv with my dad at loud volumes that my friends dont get in their house#i learned to read earlier because i was always used to reading captions on the tv and im a quick reader too#when YOU flick the lights on and off your dad would be annoyed. MINE knows im trying to get his attention and he can't hear me#if i don't want to see what he's saying i just take my glasses off. problem solved.#idk i have a lot of thoughts about this but i've ranted and rambled enough in the tags#yriesodottumblrdotcom
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ylangelegy · 1 month ago
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what the fuKCKENFR IM SO MAD I CANT REBLOG YOUR POSTS OR MSG U ON MY SIDEBLOG RN COS ANOTHER??? HOZIER??? FIC????
(work song next WHHAT WHO SAID THAT)
so full of love (i could barely eat) 🍒 seungcheol x reader.
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★ established relationship, pet name ['baby'], inspired by hozier's work song. viv, i know this was supposed to be in response to worship in the bedroom (and not really a serious request), but the thought of cheol x work song did not let me go. a little gift for u. <3 word count: 755.
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It’s nearly two in the morning when Seungcheol gets home. 
One of those days, he likes to call it. He had been out of the apartment before the sun rose up, had jumped from one schedule to another with something akin to reckless abandon. Fan meet. Radio show. Practice. Meeting.
When he’s busy, the exhaustion is kept at bay. There’s no time to think about the phantom ache behind his knee, the pesky soreness of his thigh.
But then he walks through the front door and it all comes crashing down on him. Suddenly, he is Atlas, bearing the heavens on his shoulders. 
He toes off his shoes with a soft sigh. Evidence of you is apparent from the entryway. The kitchen light has been left on. The humidifier is spewing one of his favorite scents. A collection of sweet nothings, none of which he thinks he deserves.
Had he even texted you today? Seungcheol isn’t certain. He remembers seeing your texts light up his screen, though. Gentle reminders from morning to evening. 
Don’t forget your vitamins. 
Grab lunch. 
Bundle up. It’s snowing, and your bones are weak to the cold. 
Seungcheol had listened at each turn, whether or not he realized it. A multivitamin from Seungkwan. A sandwich hurriedly eaten on the way to the studio. The scarf you had given him, the one that still faintly smelled like you.
He knows there’s probably food waiting for him in the microwave, knows you’ve likely set aside a plate in anticipation of his late arrival. Seungcheol bypasses it in favor of heading for your shared bedroom. 
Sure enough, you’re already asleep. He’ll realize a little later that you texted about that, too— a message of might be asleep when you get home, I love you— but for now, he only lingers by the doorway as he watches the gentle rise and fall of your chest. 
He feels everything then. The gnaw of guilt. The overwhelming affection. The urge to protect and provide. 
As quietly as he can manage, Seungcheol crosses the room. He can already predict how you’re going to react to him sinking into bed and sliding underneath the covers with you. 
You stir in your sleep at the feeling of Seungcheol snaking his arm around your waist. Despite being half-awake, you have the wits to mumble, “You’re still wearing outside clothes.” 
Bingo. 
Seungcheol knew it, and the thought of that— of correctly predicting what you might do or say— fills him with an odd sense of pride. He doesn’t give voice to it, though, not wanting to rouse you more than he already has. 
“I’ll change.” His voice is a murmur even though there’s no other soul in the apartment besides you two. Something about the early hour and the low light makes him feel like he should tread carefully, like the moment is as fragile as ice on a lake. “Just wanted to hold you for a bit, baby.” 
You grumble something incoherent, the words lost to the way you bury your face into the front of Seungcheol’s shirt. And suddenly Seungcheol can’t help himself. He presses a kiss to the top of your head. Then one to your forehead. Then one to your temple. Then—
“Cheol.” You whine out his name, your tone edged with exhaustion. You never did take kindly to your sleep being interrupted. 
“Sorry, sorry,” he huffs. 
He kisses the tip of your nose for good measure. 
It’s one of those days. Seungcheol is bone-tired, and home late, and he missed you. If he were a stronger man, a better man, he’d let you sleep. Stalk off to eat his microwaved dinner and change into his pajamas so you don’t gripe about dirty sheets in the morning. 
Seungcheol decides: He’s not a good man. And so instead he holds you a little tighter, leaves a couple more kisses across your face, allows his body to let go of the day’s weight. 
After his nth kiss to your face, you let out another low grumble. He’s about to apologize, about to tell you that he’ll finally, finally let off, when you tilt your head up to lazily slot your lips against his. You’re barely coherent, and yet you’re still giving him exactly what he wants needs. 
Soft, sleepy, sweet. His, his, his.
Seungcheol’s eyes flutter close. He makes no move to deepen the kiss, to ask for more than what you can offer. 
In your arms, he feels a little less like Atlas. 
In your arms, he’s just Seungcheol. 
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There's nothin' sweeter than my baby I'd never want once from the cherry tree 'Cause my baby's sweet as can be She'd give me toothaches just from kissin' me
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neil-gaiman · 11 months ago
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Hi Neil howdy
How do people commit to the career they thought of at the age of 9 im sitting here having a crisis a decade later 🙂🙂
Honestly sorry for the rant but i crave to build something big but i put zero efforts in any of my intrests even calling them a hobby would be embarassing because i dont pay attention to any of them i just know i like them because i like the idea of them i just scroll of social media half the time and im tired all the time 🙂🙂
I dont give time to anyone in my life i dont take care of myself or my family or my frienships or my career or my boyfriend and im a mess all the time i dont know how to gwt out of my depression and start acting like a normal huma being its infuriating 🙃
Sorry but idk how to handle myself rn 🥲
I know how you feel. I guess you do it one step at a time. Do the stuff that doesn't help less. Do the stuff that does help more. Make a checklist, with the basic stuff on it that keeps you going: sleep enough, eat regularly, shower, walk, and get that in.
Talk to someone with professional qualifications about how you feel and what's going on. If you don't feel happy about them, look for someone who fits your needs better.
If your hobbies and interests are not bringing you joy let them go and then find new ones. That may involve going places and trying things.
Do the stuff that helps.
Do less of the stuff that brings you down.
And take care of yourself.
(It's never too late to decide that 9 year old you didn't know what would make 19 year old you or 39 year old you happy, and change course.)
Good luck.
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sweetlittlefawntears · 4 months ago
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♡ my, my girl ♡
au : divider by chilumitos ! sorry i haven’t posted in a while i’ve been so tired n not motivated at allllll but im here haha i wanted to do more brothers best friend ellie ahhhhh i hope u all enjoy n sorry this isn’t that good like i said im feelin v unmotivated haha ;; i know i said yes to requests but i literally cannot do them rn please please bear with me
cw : DONT LIKE DONT READ !! virgin!fem reader x brothers best friend ellie williams , ellie is a bit of a perv , ellie dosent know how to convey her feelings so sometimes she’s mean (lol she’s a loser) , oral (reader receiving), NOT PROOFREAD DONT COME FOR ME ITS ONE AM. that’s it i think ?
wc : 1.8k
౨ৎ your brother had a best friend named ellie for as long as you could remember. she was gorgeous, with emerald green eyes that shone beautifully in the sun, and short auburn hair that looked so soft and cute as it fell around her face and ears.
౨ৎ you walked downstairs from your room, tired from studying and being holed up in your room all day. as you walked downstairs, you saw ellie and your brother sitting together in the kitchen, talking. you usually didn’t pay them any mind, but ellie kept staring at you. you hadn’t realized she would be downstairs, and were caught off guard when you realized she was standing in the middle of your kitchen.
౨ৎ as you walked downstairs, you moved to grab a glass from the cabinet behind ellie, but she didn’t budge. “can you move, please?” you say, exasperated. “look who finally came out of her cave!” ellie said, teasing you. you rolled your eyes as ellie finally stepped out of the way so you could get your glass. you walked over to the fridge, and ellie liked the way she could see your legs and thighs. you weren’t wearing much, just some small shorts and a white tank top, since you didn’t think anyone would be over at your house today. you also weren’t wearing a bra, because why would you do that in your own room? well, it was a bad idea, because ellie could see the entire outline of your body under the tight clothes you were wearing.
౨ৎ “damn, you showin’ off or something?” she says as you sip water from your glass. you glance at your brother, who is too obsessed with his phone to notice anything. “huh?” he says, looking up from his phone, oblivious. “cmon, let’s go watch something” he motions to the living room. ellie follows him, not paying any other glance to you.
౨ৎ later that night, you hear ellie and your brother fighting, no doubt over some stupid video game, or who won the fight they had just gotten into. you walk around your room, bored, but not wanting to go talk to your brother, because that meant seeing ellie.
౨ৎ you eventually decide to just take a shower and call it a night. you gather your things, grab a towel, and head to the bathroom when you see ellie standing right outside your bathroom door. you grab onto the towel you’re holding, and try not to act angry. “did you need something?” you say. “going somewhere?” ellie says in return. “i’m about to take a shower…?” you point to the fluffy white towel in your arms. ellie looks away, and grabs the back of her neck, rubbing it. “fuck, ellie, don’t imagine her naked…” she thinks to herself as she looks at you. “i was just gonna ask if you…wanted to watch a movie with us, but i guess- you uh…” she stutters.
౨ৎ “are you feeling okay?” you asks not used to seeing ellie like this. usually she was making some snide remark at you or pushing you around, trying to get you mad or riled up. she loved it when you were angry, it was so cute, like a little tiger. “i’m fine. are you?” ellie says, deflecting. “right. i’m gonna take that shower now.” you say, opening the door to the bathroom.
౨ৎ after your shower, you get out and walk into your bedroom, slipping on a cute pajama set, a small light gray baby tee and little gray shorts. it was your favorite. you were about to flop down on your bed and tuck yourself in to read your favorite book when you heard a slight knocking at your door.
౨ৎ you got up, a little annoyed that someone had interrupted your relaxing alone time, walked over to the door and opened it ready to tell whoever it was to go away when you saw ellie standing there. it was strange; she had never come up to your room like this before…
౨ৎ “hey. can we talk?” ellie said, and without waiting for your permission she stepped into your room. “nice room.” she commented, looking around. “what is it?” you asked timidly, seeing her walk around and pick up small trinkets and photos on your dresser.
౨ৎ “well…” she said, putting down a picture of you and your brother and turning to take a step closer to you. “we havent always gotten along, but..i never realize that youve gotten so..” she trailed off, wondering how to not sound creepy (which she totally was) talking about how much different you looked. how much more beautiful you looked lately…
౨ৎ “gotten so…what?” you say, honestly curious about where she was taking this. “cmon, you know. you…look good.” ellie said, eyeing you up and down slightly. “and you’re saying this, why?” you ask, slightly bratty since you felt it was your right, after all, she was so rude to you all the time, and never missed a chance to tease you. “cmon, puppy, youre cute. you know what i mean.”
౨ৎ and there it was. that stupid nickname she had given you. “puppy” might have sounded sweet, but ellie only teased you when you were younger for being naive, hence the nickname. but that was in the past, the nickname seemed so different now, almost loving.
౨ৎ she stepped closer to you, reaching out to touch your arms. “cmon, i see the way you look at me now too. i like you, ok?” she said, a little sternly, as if she was trying to convince you to even be in the same room as her. “ellie, this is-“ but she cut you off before you could continue by cupping your face and kissing you.
౨ৎ “are you okay?” ellie said, pulling back to see your flustered face. you took a minute to get used to the feeling of her actually wanting to touch you, to be near you, but once you had gotten over that, all you wanted was to feel her lips on yours. you were nervous, you’d only been kissed a few times and you could tell ellie wanted to do a bit more than just that.
౨ৎ you were pressed against the wall next to your bed, whimpering under her. “needy, huh?” she said, pressed her right knee between your legs. “i like patient girls, y’know.” as she grinded against you, giving you the friction you so desperately craved, you couldnt help but moan softly into her mouth as her tongue brushed your lips, silently asking to be let in. of course you spread those pretty lips of yours to let her taste every inch of your mouth, faint sounds coming from both of you as you kissed filling room with a sinful air of lust and heat.
౨ৎ eventually you two make your way over to your own bed, sitting in ellies lap with your back pressed against her chest, ellie comfortingly shushing you and reassuring you that she would take good care of you. “shh, bun, s’okay. ive gotcha.” she said soothingly as she pulled down the little gray shorts you were wearing and tossing them to the side of your bed.
౨ৎ as her hand trailed down, further towards your panties, slipping under the soft cotton, she felt the wetness of your cunt under her slender fingers. “this your first time…?” she asked, rubbing gentle circles around your clit. “well- thats…” you trail off. “none of my business?” she finishes your sentence for you. “s’okay if it is, bun.” she says as she continues to circle your pearl, drawing out whimpers from you.
౨ৎ ellie puts her hand over your mouth. “sorry bun, s’much as i like hearing those pretty sounds, you dont want your brother to know about this, do you?” she was right, like always. you shook your head slightly, almost unable to comprehend anything except the way her soft fingers felt touching you. “so, so wet for me…” she says among other praises.
౨ৎ “you think you’re ready bun?” she says, sliding her fingers towards your sweet entrance. “mhm…” you said, almost shaking with anticipation, holding onto her forearm, her other hand still gently covering your mouth. as she slides two fingers inside you, you grip onto her thigh as she continues to slowly push her fingers in and out of you. “so good, bun. just like that.” she said as you moaned softly each time she pulled out of you.
౨ৎ “you look so cute like this..i wish i couldve seen it earlier.” ellie said, smiling to herself at the proud moment of being able to be the first one to have you like this. “taking my fingers so well, huh?” she said, not even expecting a reply as you were already too fucked out to think for yourself.
౨ৎ “you can cum whenever you want, bun.” she said. usually she wouldve made you beg for it, or been a little mean, but there was something about how sweet and pure you looked taking her fingers, sitting between her legs on your own bed committing such a sinful act that enticed her so much she couldnt wait to feel you lose yourself and cum all over her fingers.
౨ৎ as you whimpered softly under her, she moved the hand over your mouth to softly stroke your thigh. “s’okay, just be quiet…” she said as she comforted you, still pushing those damn fingers in and out of you. it didnt take long after that for you to cum, trying to hold back your moans, and of course she praised you the whole way through.
౨ৎ “aw, you just look so so cute like this…” she said, looking at your face, slightly flushed and sweaty from the way she had made you feel. without missing a beat she slowly pulled her fingers out of you, and, since she was ellie, bringing them to her mouth to lick them clean.
౨ৎ as you layed on her, breathing still heavy, she got up and guided you to the bathroom, cleaning you gently and whispering sweet nothings and apologies for you being overly sensitive. the coldness of the bathroom and the warmth of her body and hands on you, and the way ellie helped you step into a fresh pair of panties felt so loving to you.
౨ৎ as you laid next to her in your bed, she softly stroked your hair, watching you as you fell asleep, kissing your cheek and cuddling you from behind. she hoped you would still feel good about this in the morning.
౨ৎ it was definitely safe to say that your first time being with ellie was exactly the way it was supposed to happen.
HAIII thank you for reading im literally so fucking tired and this is so so so shitty i swear on my life i hate this but i really reallllyyy wanted to post for you all :( im sorry for not getting to requests i will try my best but like i said ive been so so sooo unmotivated, anyways ENOUGH PITY PARTYING hopefully someone will enjoy this AHHHH
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