#i was writing it just for funsies without the intention of it being like. a serious fic | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

spacegoathours · 1 year ago

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gonna ramble about calnr below the cut

bc I’m BORED and this is MY blog I do what I WANT

TW for self-harm, I think. I am not nice to my girl

edit: i sat on this for days and it’s long and stupid but i’m sick of seeing it in my drafts. every day i strive to be worse than the last ✌🏼✨

since I am the worst at writing, and really not creative overall, I struggle with stepping outside of the few things I’ve drawn which range from generic cutesy things to angsty AF

at some point I’m gonna have to suck it up and make sense of their relationship, why it’s even necessary for both of them, and what the endgame is. is this just for funsies and doesn’t matter? yes. is my brain not going to leave me alone until I make sense of everything? also yes.

like. ok. we can assume that Lard Nar has dealt with a lot of loss. he lost his home first and foremost, but it can also be assumed that he’s lost a lot of loved ones, family and friends and so on, either by imprisonment or death by Irken hand. this makes him not only opposed to commitment for fear of losing someone but especially opposed to commitment to an Irken.

at the same time we like to think that Lard Nar sees past how Irkens tend to be on the surface and understands that they’re just victims of Irken society, this awful propaganda that turns what could be free-thinking individuals into single-minded drones privy to violence and hatred of other alien races.

he knows deep down that Callie is good because she saved him during the Vort disaster. that’s highly unusual Irken behavior and the act sticks with him years down the line, even after watching as his planet got conquered and his family imprisoned. so the two views go back and forth in his mind, i guess.

obviously trusting Callie in the end is what happens since they do, eventually, have some sort of complicated relationship. once he opens up to her, that fear of losing her just like he lost everyone else becomes super exasperated, now that he’s let Callie be someone important to him.

this really sucks for him because Callie is fiercely independent and leaves the Resisty ship often. each time is either quietly leaving without anyone knowing or getting very angry and leaving, never with the intent to come back. she just wants to be left alone at first.

(tw implied self-harm below)

Callie gets into a lot of trouble while away from the Resisty. the story I keep trying to tell with her is dark; she hates herself, a lot, has no sense of self-preservation and comes back fucked up every time. most of the time she’s found by the Resisty and they have to bring her back to health again.

her background of like… forced to train hard as hell to become a top elite next to miyuki and never wanting that future, having to escape her home planet because she would have been killed otherwise, actually being killed painfully after finally finding what felt like home, waking up in a body that isn’t hers and another Irken’s mind battling with her own, and by this point assuming that the Resisty just wants to use her because she could potentially be a huge threat to the Empire…

this girl’s mental state is bad by the end of it all.

and actually, most of the Resisty hates her at first, which doesn’t help. they just got done trusting an Irken who betrayed them and nearly got them all killed (Nyx). but their captain feels that he owes Callie, she saved his life after all so many years ago, so he saves hers in the only opportunity that arises to make it possible. so the rest kinda have to deal.

after some time goes by, Lard Nar realizes that he’s gone from “ok I have returned the favor my work here is done” to “fuck I really care about you please stop hurting yourself like this”. and he does see Callie as a potential asset to their cause at first, but doesn’t press the subject. after he realizes oh fuck I have feelings for this Irken he drops the idea from his mind entirely; he just wants her to be okay. Callie, seeing no future for herself, has no interest in joining the Resisty or being in any sort of relationship.

Eventually she comes around after slowly realizing that the Resisty has 1.) learned to trust her after Nyx’s personality is fully gone and they spend more time getting to know her true self and her history and 2.) saved her time and time again without expecting anything in return, proving that they actually do care. her mental state starts to improve slowly but surely.

Callie officially joins the Resisty and goes on missions with them. somewhere in this part of the story is where she realizes how much she cares about Lard Nar in return. but emotions are very confusing for Irkens, especially those surrounding romantic feelings, so Callie doesn’t know what to do half the time. she’ll go to Laksa like “hey Nar brought me flowers from a nearby planet and asked if I needed anything while I’m stuck in the med bay and it made me feel weird what does this mean” and Laksa will be like ROLLS EYES.

this girl stubborn AF and when she understands what she’s feeling for Lard Nar is love, she’s in denial about it. her??? with a Vortian???? that’s wrong!!! it’s not, but the things you’re taught on Irk take some time to unlearn. anything between them is kept in private and even though she thinks she has their relationship under wraps, the rest of the Resisty is like “oh wow sweet gossip” and they are very aware lol.

there is a mission at some point where some Irken enforcers capture Lard Nar and keep him imprisoned for a while, and Callie rips through the prison’s guards like they are nothing to save him, and at this point she doesn’t care what people think anymore. when she saved him and some other scientists the first time on Vort she didn’t think much of it, it was just the right thing to do and she took hold of the opportunity. this time she’d stop at nothing to make sure he’s safe, even if that means murdering a ton of Irken guards, going very much against her own ideals.

the two become highly protective of each other and intermittently co-dependent because of their different traumas surrounding loss. I don’t think this makes for the healthiest relationship - sometimes one or the other will realize they’re being clingy and pull back for fear of getting hurt. it probably takes them a very long time to get to a point where the fear of losing the other becomes less important than the desire to be together.

also like…this takes a while. you can’t erase the past, and the reality is that Irkens and Vortians have a very strained relationship with each other. Lard Nar occasionally gets a sinking feeling in his gut when he’s around Callie, remembering the history surrounding the broken alliance. This is an Irken who can choose to betray his trust at any moment, and it’s not like it hasn’t happened to him personally. Callie, being on the “winning” side between the two, feels overwhelming guilt and often feels like she doesn’t deserve to be with Lard Nar because of what the Irkens - her people - have done to him.

I think I want them to have a happy ending where they can overcome their pasts, but ugh. I sure do view the IZ universe and timeline as very dark and awful and sure do love putting characters thru the horrors.

like I said before I’m bad at writing and there are a lot of elements here I want to include, which is why this ended up so lengthy, but some probably contradict others!! it’s just a string of thoughts though, so take it all with a grain of salt I guess. eventually I’ll simplify things which would make it easier to come up with ideas for writing/drawing. or just do whatever. whenever. this is literally just textbook “I want to shove my OC into every aspect of canon because I need to live” fuck it we ball

umm anyway how’d this get so fucking long. if you made it this far why did you do that. goodnight

#mina talks #a lot #fair warningggg

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amethystkarl · 3 years ago

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Sunflower Feelings -- Sapnap x f!oc

Hi friends, mcyt fic debut here! This is a fic I am in the progress of writing for a friend, so please bear that in mind if you choose to read. Most aspects have been requested, I just also decided to upload here for feedback and funsies.

If you do read, I hope you enjoy and come back for more when I eventually have it! :D This is essentially Dream and Sapnap Get a Roommate: The Sitcom.

Friendly reminder that of course, this is both purely fictional and loosely based on content uploaded by these creators. Please respect both their and my boundaries by not sending/tagging creators.

prologue.

chapter 1.

chapter 2.

chapter 3.

iv. “I’m so lost in you, in all that you do.”

Dream is in one of those moods where he just babbles his internal monologue out loud. The statement comes out of nowhere, and Sarah’s head snaps up from her phone at record speed. Nick sits quietly, eyebrows raised in amusement. They’re all hanging out in Dream’s room, as he woke up sick and whiny and unwilling to move, but also unwilling to be alone.

Come to think of it, the exorbitant amount of cold medicine in the man’s system is probably a contributing factor to what he says. “Sarah, you should stream with us sometime.”

“Absolutely not.” The speed of her answer surprises both boys, and they exchange a look as she shakes her head. “That many people being aware of my existence is. . . horrifying.”

“It still is, kind of,” Nick says absently. Sarah turns to look at him, head cocked slightly.

“What do you me--” Sarah cuts herself off, gesturing in frustration. “Not what do you mean, I mean, why. . . why do you do it? If it’s scary?” She huffs, throwing her hands up as she searches for the right words. Nick is patient, wanting to respect her full thought and willing to wait until she can articulate it properly. Dream giggles, definitely loopy from accidentally taking NyQuil instead of DayQuil. Sarah shakes her head.

“Ugh, okay, let me start over. What I’m asking, I think, is what do you love about streaming? Like, what makes streaming as a career worth the scary parts?” She smiles, finally satisfied with her question, and Nick takes a moment. He racks his brain, wanting desperately to match her thoughtfulness. Dream has been distracted by the sitcom playing on his TV, so Sarah and Nick just lower their voices. She sits cross-legged on the end of Dream’s bed, facing the office chair Nick is slowly swiveling back and forth in.

“It’s not so much about the streaming itself.” Nick pauses again, forming his words carefully and deliberately. Sarah is staring at him, listening intently, and her gaze is not helping his thought process. Nick takes a breath.

“Okay, like, it is insane that my job is just. . . playing games with my friends. Of course it’s more than that, with merch and YouTube and whatever, but at its core, I’m just hanging out with my friends, professionally.” Sarah nods, brow slightly furrowed as she listens. He wants to kiss the little wrinkle between her eyebrows away.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m so thankful for the supporters I have, like I am literally nothing without them behind me. I just--” Nick echoes Sarah’s earlier gestures, striving for more eloquence than he has in his entire school career. “I just feel like I’m under a microscope sometimes, and getting to do what I love on my own time with the people I love is honestly always worth all the. . . scary stuff.” He stares at his fingers, suddenly embarrassed at his own earnesty.

“No, that makes perfect sense.” Sarah nods slowly, and Nick raises his head to meet her eyes with his. “That’s a feeling that a lot of people spend their entire lives searching for.”

Nick smiles, happy he got his point across well. She hasn’t stopped staring at him though, and Nick isn’t sure what to do. He is definitely imagining things. Or maybe he’s not, he literally can’t tell anymore, but it definitely feels like Sarah is looking directly at his mouth. And he really wants it to be true, because he can feel himself starting to lean forward, and holy shit there’s no way this is actually about to happen--

He’s right. Nothing is about to happen. Because his stupid, big dumb idiot of a best friend snores. Dream must have fallen asleep during him and Sarah’s conversation, and the combination of both his sitting-up sleeping position and his impressively clogged sinuses produce the loudest, grossest, mid-snore snort he has ever heard in his life.

“Oh my god, I think his snot is alive,” Sarah stage-whispers, giggling through her face of mild disgust. Nick’s entire body relaxes in relief as he realizes Sarah didn’t even notice him reading way too far into the previous moment. He laughs and helps her get off the bed quietly, Sarah using him to lean on as not to disturb their pitiful roommate.

Once they make it safely out of the room, Nick lets out a burst of laughter, clapping a hand over his mouth as Sarah giggles next to him. They wander into the kitchen, bumping their shoulders together as they take turns exchanging glances. Sarah takes a few steps ahead as she stands in the kitchen, hands on her hips and back to Nick. She takes a moment before clapping her hands together and turning to him.

“We’re going to make chicken soup.” Nick’s eyes widen.

“. . . we?” Sarah nods firmly, and Nick tries not to smile too hard as her fingers wrap around his wrist and pull. They knock shoulders again, and Sarah turns to him, pointing to the fridge.

“Yes, we. Grab that leftover rotisserie chicken from the fridge please, there should be leeks and carrots in the drawer.” Nick nods, immediately eager to please as he opens the refrigerator door. He’s nervous, which is pretty usual standard for being in Sarah’s presence; but, it’s different this time. For one, he wants to kiss her even more now, after getting so close. He also wants to impress Sarah, and if he can’t be great at cooking, he can definitely be great at listening.

“C’mere, I’ll show you how I want the slices.” Nick is entranced as Sarah pulls the cutting board closer to her, deft hands grabbing 2 onions from the counter before segmenting one of them into paper-thin cuts. He marvels at how she can move so fast and yet so precisely. Marvels so closely, he almost misses her eyes searching his, hand poised to hand the knife over. “See?”

“Uh, yeah,” his voice is soft, matching hers on instinct. He closes his fingers over the knife handle without breaking eye contact, fingers itching to stay as they brush hers in the exchange. He wants to imagine the pads of her fingers glide over the back of his hand for longer than they should’ve; he wants to, but he turns and dutifully begins to slice, willing the back of his neck to cool down.

“How about the carrots?” Nick’s voice is soft, and he’s shy in a way he hasn’t been since they first met. That’s the thing about Sarah: she can make anyone feel comfortable with her, even him. It’s not that he’s uncomfortable. Rather, she just makes him so damn nervous. He feels like a child again, amazed by the smallest of things.

He’s amazed by Sarah’s hair, as she sweeps it up into a loose ponytail. Her eyes, flitting between the pot of stock waiting to boil and the chicken carcass she’s nimbly stripping of meat, shreds of chicken being relocated to a small mixing bowl. Her hands, delicately dropping the bones into the pot. Her back, arching slightly as she reaches into the spice cabinet over her head. Her skin, illuminated by the sun glowing through the kitchen window.

“Almost done with those?” Sarah asks, gesturing towards the cutting board with a wooden spoon. Nick suppresses a laugh as droplets of chicken stock flick over the counter.

“Yup. Here?” Nick points to the stock pot, and Sarah grins, impressed.

“Correct, thank you Nicholas.” Sarah tips an imaginary hat in his direction. Nick mirrors the movement.

“M’lady.” A laugh bursts from Sarah, and she rolls her eyes playfully.

“Not the fedora, no,” she whines, drawing out the last vowel. Nick laughs as he scrapes the sliced veggies off of the cutting board and into the pot. Sarah’s eyes are trained on her stock as she drops an herb bundle inside, nodding to herself as she covers the pot. As she explains her process of making chicken soup to Nick, he tries to listen. He tries really hard.

But it’s close to twilight, and the setting sun is making Sarah look really pretty right now. The flyaway ends of her loosely tied hair look golden awash in the kitchen window, and Nick does not remember taking a creative writing class in high school, but he wants to write a poem to describe what Sarah looks like right now. Her face is relaxed, happy as she chatters on about the best noodles for chicken soup–”. . .pappardelle, that like, really wide spaghetti noodle? Underrated choice, not to mention–”

“Oh shit, Sarah.” Nick manages to tear his eyes away from her impassioned face when he hears sizzling. The water for said pasta has boiled over, watered-down foam sliding down the sides of the pan and hitting the stovetop. Sarah curses and turns down the heat, and Nick takes the moment to steel himself,

Stop staring at your roommate, you’re being creepy and weird.

He’s not sure how, but they’ve managed to make a really good chicken noodle soup. Well, it was more of Sarah cooking and Nick watching so he guesses it’s not that big of a mystery. Here he is again, just watching as she ladles the steaming broth into a large glass tupperware. She’s so sure, not a drop spilled as she portions out 3 bowls from the bottom of the massive pot.

“Can you. . .?” Sarah gestures her arms up towards the pot, and Nick crosses the distance in 2 strides. He lifts the pot and pours, careful not to shove his arm under Sarah’s chin as she uses the wooden spoon to scrape the last of the chicken from the bottom of the pot. He doesn’t even realize he’s holding his breath until his vision starts to waver, and his biceps tighten like a vice as he fears dropping the cooking vessel. Sarah thanks him and slides her arms away just in time for Nick to place the pot back on the stove and take a few deep breaths, fighting to keep his chest steady so Sarah doesn’t notice.

Christ dude, get it together.

Luckily, Dream has evidently woken up and smelled something cooking, and his text in their group chat distracts both him and Sarah. They spend the rest of the day eating soup and watching TV in Dream’s room, playing cards when they get bored of the TV, and GoPuffing more tissues when Dream uses them all. And if some microwave popcorn and candy make their way into the GoPuff cart, it’s fine. Secret movie night in Dream’s room after he falls asleep is fine. Sarah falls asleep on the floor, slumped against Nick’s shoulder and it’s honestly, fine.

Chapter title cred: lost in you by khai dreams

#sunflower feelings #sapnap #sapnap imagine #sapnap headcanon #sapnap headcannon #sapnap fic #sapnap fanfic #sapnap fanfiction #sapnap x oc #sanpa x f!oc #dream #dreamwastaken #georgenotfound #mcyt #mcyt fic #mcyt fanfic #mcyt fanfiction

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prinxlyart · 4 years ago

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No prob! Even if its just moral I love to support the artists I follow! And I will👍! Now I only have one(two maybe) question left for your Willumity AU: Who would propose first and who would they do it? (And if you allow Boscha to redeem herself in this, what relationship would she have with them?) Take care!

Oof this is a toughie. Hmmmmmmmmm........ I mean, lots of shenanigans would ensue, for sure for sure for sure, but what kind of shenanigans.....

[warning: this is like. Hella long y’all. I’m talking like, super deep dive into Boscha redemption territory. I’m not even kidding, it’s taken me all weekend to write this because there’s so much. I don’t even get into proposals...You’ve been warned]

Okay so!

Boscha sees all the girls have gotten together into one big relationship and is sort of knocked back on her ass. Amity? In a romantic relationship with Half-A-Witch and the Human????? What the fuck happened to that girl?! She’s been at a loss for how to even interact with them ever since a rumor had spread that Luz had gone toe-to-toe with the Emperor. Boscha wasn’t sure she believed that before, but watching her supposed friend of more than half a decade just drop her like she was nothing to go all soft over this human? Maybe Luz did do something impressive enough to garner Amity’s attention.

She would rather die than admit out loud (or even to herself) that she had a crush on Amity. It hurt her so much more than she realized when Amity stopped hanging out with her and it was just driving a stake through her heart when Amity defended them and joined their Grudgby team for that stupid challenge. It took her weeks following that whole fiasco to even look at Amity, let alone talk about her with the rest of her friend group, that by the time she thought she was over it, she looked up and saw her blushing and linking arms with both girls she’d played against Boscha with. Boscha may have broken her locker than day. She refused to say why.

If I’m following all of my narrative speculation threads, I think Skara pulls her aside one day and tells her she needs to calm tf down. Luz and Willow are chill as hell and they don’t deserve the vicious death glares Boscha’s been sending them. I think that’s the final nail in the coffin for Boscha. Her other supposed best friend is turning on her too?? But she isn’t??? Boscha’s head and heart are so confused by all this that she just skips the next day of school. I think she spends the day in the (newly-rebuilt) Treasure Shack just staring at the ceiling and tossing a hackey sack into the air while she blasts music that she doesn’t hear because she’s so deep in her own thoughts. Skara would find her immediately after school let’s out. There’s only one place Boscha would be if she skipped class for a day. Before any of the other teens make their way to the Treasure Shack, they leave so they can talk somewhere more private.

I think they spend a really long time hashing out Boscha’s thoughts and feelings. Skara even feels brave enough to bring up why they’re always so mean to others. There are other ways to prove how awesome you are without actively putting others down. In fact, putting others down to be on top is almost like cheating; you’re not actually proving you’re the best if you’re hindering your competition. Skara knows how awesome and amazing Boscha is and can be, but they spend their time just being mean to everyone else rather than actually showing off their talents. She also mentions how scary powerful Willow actually is and confirms the rumors about Luz taking on the Emperor and living to tell the tale so it’s not like they have no magical ability. Amity might just be rolling with the new most powerful witches at Hexside. Dating them even. And have you seen that illusion track kid in action?? He created some complex illusions during their Grudgby match and that was for funsies. They’re a severely powerful group. And they’re liked by everyone because they’re so kind. They’re revered by their classmates for being so powerful and so nice at the same time, meanwhile they just fear Boscha. They don’t think she’s all that great, but she is powerful enough to kill them if need be, so they just stay out of her way. Boscha hates everything Skara points out but doesn’t deny any of it.

Skara admits she’s been talking with Willow a lot about all of this; she’s definitely apologized for the bullying she’s done in the past and Willow actually accepted it which surprises Boscha. A lot of her insight is a mix of hashing shit out with Willow in the Greenhouse after school and some self reflection at home, but that’s why they all hang out together now. Oh, and she and Amity had a sleepover relatively recently where they decided to start their friendship over. Now they’re actually friends and can say so with a smile because it’s true and it’s not just to appease their parents.

Boscha never thought she’d do this in her life but she just bites the inside of her cheek and does it anyway: she asks Skara for advice. All Skara knows to suggest confidently is to think about how she treats everyone and how that can be changed. She also tells her to think about what she actually wants. Does she want to be the school bully? Or does she actually want to be friends with Amity again? Does she maybe want to find out how cool Luz and Willow are? They’re definitely all a package deal by now and it might be hard to be friends with Amity again after how horribly they’d treated Willow over the years. Boscha spends the entire weekend thinking over everything she talked about with Skara.

The following school week, Boscha is having a hard time getting Willow alone. At least one of her girlfriends is always by her side by the time she can find her between classes. It’s not until after school that Boscha manages to beat both Luz and Amity to the Greenhouse to ask Willow if they can talk. Willow is wary at first, but sees that Boscha has a weird look to her that sets aside and fears of Boscha attempting to pick on her. She noticed that Boscha has barely even looked at her in weeks. So she agrees and they find an empty classroom to talk in privately (Willow lets Amity and Luz know that she’s busy and will meet them later). Willow waits expectantly for Boscha to threaten her or yell at her or whatever else and is shocked (and maybe even scared?) when Boscha finally blurts out her apology. She lets Boscha just ramble her apologies for a while and watches her fumble over her words and her face turn a little red and genuinely doesn’t know how to react. Has the world turned upside down? Is it Opposite Day? Is this some kind of elaborate prank? The tears in Boscha’s eyes suggest that it’s not. Eventually Willow stops her and they just sit in silence for a minute while Willow kind of turns it all over in her head. Boscha’s freaking out because Willow is just standing there watching her and she feels like she’s a bug under a magnifying glass. I think Willow truly doesn’t know what to say and just kinda sighs and picks up her bag to get ready to leave and tells Boscha she just needs to think about everything she said. Because she can’t forgive her, not for the years of ceaseless bullying, but she needs to think about whether or not she’ll even accept her apology. Boscha just kinda nods numbly and Willow leaves and Boscha just sorta melts into the floor from exhaustion and frayed nerves.

I think Willow would ask Skara first about what she thinks of Boscha’s apology; they’re still friends after all, even though Skara’s been hanging out with them more often. Skara’s blown away because she didn’t think the talk they had just the previous Friday afternoon would lead to all that. So now Willow knows the apology is real. She’ll tell her girlfriends next because they’re also directly affected by this and they are also both shell-shocked. Amity is unsure of everything simply because she’s witnessed Boscha’s behavior first-hand for years and this just doesn’t sound like her (Luz agrees, oddly quietly), but Willow confirmed with Skara that it was a real apology. That that was why Boscha wasn’t at school on Friday. I think they’re all at the Owl House while they have this conversation so Eda and Lilith both overhear and throw their two snails in; Eda knows from experience that sometimes bullies are only bullies because they’ve been raised that way. She had some school friends that were pretty nasty before realizing just how nasty they were after the kids they were bullying got into some serious trouble. Lilith confirms the stories and also throws in that, based on her own experience, she may be doing all the wrong things with what she thinks are the right intentions. This gives all three of them something to think about for the rest of the night.

I’d say it takes them roughly the rest of the week to really come to a conclusion. The entire time, Boscha is begging Skara for any updates but Skara isn’t in on that loop. So in the meantime, she asks Skara for help in fixing her behavior during their free time. Boscha came to the conclusion on her own that she doesn’t actually want to be a bully, she just wants to feel acknowledged for her efforts. Skara reprimands her for falling back on bullying tactics when things don’t go the way Boscha wants them to. Their other friends in their friend group pick up on this and are 100% on board with helping Boscha be a better person. They were all too scared to disrupt the flow that they had to call her out before, but now that Boscha’s actually trying to be better?? They’re all in to help her. I don’t think Boscha’s ever felt this kind of support before. Her whole life she’s had friends to back her up when she tooted her own horn, her pack to intimidate by numbers. But now they’re actually wanting to help her? They’re not just sticking around so they themselves don’t become ostracized? Boscha’s never really experienced that before and it makes her feel warm inside. At first she thinks she’s sick but Bo (I think her name is Bo; the light-skinned healing track girl with the freckles that taught Skara that fire-to-ice spell) runs a quick diagnosing spell over her and let’s her know that no, she’s not sick, she’s just experiencing happiness for once. Everyone else laughs, even Boscha after a moment because holy shit, she’s actually happy.

Over the course of that week, our main trio is quietly watching Boscha’s metamorphosis from the sidelines. They’re all confused at first; she really is trying to change? Luz is the first one to get excited though. It’s just like one of her favorite character tropes: bully learns to be nice and is better for it (and maybe falls in love with the person they’ve been bullying). Willow scoffs at that, but she does admit that it’s reassuring to see Boscha actually making the effort. In public too, she’s not trying to hide the fact that she wants to change. Luz, being in all the tracks at Hexside, gets the chance to actually talk to each of the girls in Boscha’s friend group about the whole situation and gets some pretty solid evidence that yes, Boscha’s really making that effort. She reports as much back to her girlfriends and by the time the week ends, Willow’s the one tracking down Boscha by the Potions Hall to take her aside for a chat.

Boscha is scared shitless when Willow asks to talk to her for the first time since Monday but obliges and they find a private place to talk. Willow lets her know that she’s ready to accept her apology and Boscha nearly bursts into tears in relief. She knows that it isn’t forgiveness, but Willow is accepting the fact that she’s trying to change and she is sorry for her past actions. Willow fills her in on all the various (drama? Lack of drama?) chatter about her trying so hard to be nicer from Boscha’s friend group that Boscha actually does start crying at that. She’s so relieved that her friends aren’t doing this as some kind of payback; that they’re actually supporting her with no ulterior motives. They’d have every reason and right to, but they aren’t and Boscha is so relieved to hear as much. Willow doesn’t know if she should try to comfort her or what so they both kind of stand there awkwardly for a minute while Boscha wipes the tears from her face. She thanks Willow for accepting her apology and vows to her (maybe a little too dramatically; it actually makes Willow want to laugh because it reminds her so much of Luz) that she will be a better witch. Not just a better witch to her and her friends, but to everyone. When they part ways for the weekend, they’re both buzzing with giddiness. Boscha, because Willow finally accepted her apology and knew that this was a huge first step in her road to being a better witch. Willow because she knows for certain that Boscha’s giving this her all; and maybe they could even become friends. Skara and Amity did a do-over on their friendship, maybe Boscha’s hoping to do the same.

Shockingly, Boscha actually goes to Luz next by sitting next to her during their shared potions class the following week. She slides her a note asking to speak with her outside of class to which Luz agrees (with a silly doodle of a winky face and a thumbs up that makes Boscha nearly giggle). Boscha apologizes to Luz next for her behavior towards her and much to Boscha’s surprise, Luz not only accepts her apology, but forgives her too. Boscha didn’t even expect that. Luz explains that she hasn’t been on the Boiling Isles long enough to be really affected by Boscha’s past bullying, not like her girlfriends. And she’s super grateful and proud of Boscha for reaching out to Willow first and actually going to the lengths she’s been going to to be a better person. Boscha, not used to praise that she wasn’t fishing for, just blushes and nods. Luz sort of coos at her and comments on how cute she looks when she blushes which only makes her blush harder and start threatening Luz with empty promises of violence if she doesn’t shut up. Luz starts running away, cackling, and calls out to her as she’s leaving that she hopes they can be friends some day soon. Boscha silently agrees and goes home with a goofy smile that won’t leave her face no matter how hard she tries because Luz called her cute. She shoves that thought aside for the time being, just grateful that Luz was so quick to forgive her.

Finally, she approaches Amity. Or rather, she leaves a note in her locker because the Abomination Hall and the Potions Hall are nowhere near each other. At this point, Amity is on the fence about what she wants to do because on the one hand, she was never truly friends with Boscha and she’s not sure if she wants to be. On the other hand, she’s been watching Boscha change over the last week and a half and is actually surprised at how hard she’s working at it. She isn’t surprised by how hard she’s working; Boscha always gives 110% into anything she does, she’s just surprised that she’s working at being nice at all. But between Willow telling them how their chat went on Friday and Luz telling them about their talk on Monday (and Luz mentioning how cute Boscha was when she was red and sputtering her empty threats), she’s at least willing to hear her out. So she stands there and waits for Boscha to start and is actually kind of surprised to see Boscha’s already so pink she’s almost the same shade as her own hair. I think she’s silently patient out of shock more so than any amount of politeness. She’s never seen Boscha....flustered????? Luz was right, it is kind of cute, but now isn’t the time for that.

Boscha kept her conversation with Amity for last because she knew it was the hardest one to have. She had been pushing it aside for the last few weeks now; although she’s finally admitted to herself that she (has/had?) a crush on her. By the time they make it somewhere private, Boscha’s so nervous that she’s almost shaking. And Amity is just standing there, watching her, and saying nothing. That is until Boscha nearly starts crying and Amity finally breaks, if only due to concern. They may not have ever been real friends, but neither of them were heartless either. Amity manages to coax some words out of Boscha through her thick tears and once the words start, they don’t stop. Boscha didn’t mean to admit her crush on Amity to her face, but that sort of slipped out with all her other apologies and explanations. Amity desperately wishes Luz or Willow were there with her because they are so much better at emotional shit than Amity is. Amity does flush when she hears Boscha confess her crush on her and doesn’t really know what to say to that. Boscha had a crush on her? This whole time? She had a crush on the Amity from before she met Luz???? Amity considered herself an entirely different person from who she was before she met Luz. To think that Boscha’s quietly been harboring feelings for her all that time? Even before that time?? It’s flattering to say the least, but she definitely has mixed feelings about it. She didn’t like who she was before she met Luz. It’s hard to imagine someone else liking her.

Their conversation takes a long time to really hash out. They have a long history to sort out; sorting out Boscha’s feelings and identifying instances where they were horrible to other witches and how it wasn’t okay. There’s so many things that need to be figured out between the two of them. I think Boscha remembers what Skara had done and offers they have a sleepover to really try to start their friendship over. But I don’t think Amity is actually comfortable with that yet. Not due to Boscha’s crush on her or anything, just because it’s a different situation than it was with Skara. There would be a lot more to cover than just learning about what sort of music the other likes. And Boscha is definitely crushed on the inside, but just accepts it because she knows it’s a lot. I think after a while they both leave with the promise that they’ll continue this conversation later; Amity just needs to consult her girls first. She really doesn’t know how to handle all this and needs to just kinda decompress with her girlfriends and sort out all of her thoughts. Boscha agrees; they both have each other’s scroll contacts still, so they can reach out to each other whenever they’re ready to continue that conversation.

I think Willow and Luz would find it adorable that Boscha has/had a crush on Amity (which only makes Amity blush and chide them for not focusing on the subject at hand). Luz is super excited about Boscha trying to make amends all over the place. She’s even watched her between classes go out of her way to apologize to others too, so it’s not just them she’s trying to make amends with. Boscha always has one of her friends with her when she does this, but mostly as support or to remind her to not use bullying tactics or words when she’s trying to apologize. There’s been a low buzz of rumors going on about it too, Boscha’s strange change of heart has captured the attention of most students. Amity still isn’t sure how to feel about the whole situation though. There’s less to apologize for between them and more just explaining themselves. Why they never held each other accountable for their shitty behavior, why Amity seemed to just tolerate Boscha’s existence while Boscha silently harbored a crush on her; there was less in terms of wrong doings between the two of them and more just laying their cards on the table. I think Luz would be the one to suggest she go through with the slumber party, but maybe also have Skara join them as a sort of mediator. Willow is also hesitant; she doesn’t want to encourage her girlfriend to venture into something that makes her so uncomfortable, but she agrees with Luz that they need to clear the air between them. She admits that having Skara there would actually help a lot with that; Skara seeking Willow out on her own terms to apologize to Willow and talking with her so openly gave Willow more than enough reason to trust her with Amity’s feelings, especially after they reconciled their own friendship.

I actually don’t know what sort of history those girls have, but I’ve actually been in Amity’s place before. I’ve tolerated the existence of a person who developed a crush on me and it was....awkward at best. This person didn’t try to be a better person in the time that I knew them though. They just kept making excuses for their shitty behavior, so I’m genuinely not sure how this would all play out. I think having Skara join them for this weekend-long feelings jam certainly helps things along; she knows when to push them to tell the truth and when to sit back and let them take their time. I think by the coming school week (we’re what, in week 3 of Boscha’s redemption arc by now??? Almost a whole month of this emotional vulnerability??? How exhausting), they do manage to find a stable ground to start rebuilding their friendship. It takes a while, and I think Boscha’s nervous about it at first, mostly due to Willow’s near-constant presence around Amity, but Luz’s just. Sheer determination to befriend Boscha and integrate her into their ever-growing friend group both encourages Boscha and softens Willow’s stiffness in her presence.

Oofa doofa, I don’t even know how long it would take before any of them truly catch feelings RE: Boscha. I think Luz picks up on Boscha’s nervousness around Willow first and teases Boscha about it when they’re alone. And Willow and Amity do agree, Boscha is very cute when she blushes hard enough to match the color of her hair. It’s also fun to watch her freak out and turn into just one big pink blob hissing obscenities at a cackling Luz. I think Luz might get caught up in her fiction character tropes a little too much before she realizes she’s not taking Willow’s feelings into account (not so much that it causes damage; they’ve probably been dating for months now by this time). Luz would have to ask Willow how she felt about Boscha overall and Willow I think....would be unsure for a very long time. I think eventually, long after Boscha’s been fully integrated into their friend group and she’s actually seen who Boscha is when she’s a good friend and not a bully, does Willow begin to feel the inklings of feelings sneaking into her heart. Amity is in a similar boat as Willow, but neither make their feelings known for quite some time. They’re happy with their little triad relationship; they’re not sure what it would mean to include Boscha when they were still so unsure of their feelings.

Luz is so full of love she literally radiates it and it’s contagious. I don’t even thunk she realizes she’s developed a fondness for Boscha until several months after they’ve become friends. Besides, she’s far too busy teasing Boscha about her crush on Willow and Amity to realize how much Boscha also seems to blush around her. I don’t think she gets it until one day Boscha just shoves something in her hands and stalks off to class and when Luz looks at what she gave her, she just kinda gasps. Because Boscha definitely gave her a note that just reads “I like you too, you idiot”. Luz just runs to Willow and Amity and shows them the note and they all three call an emergency girlfriend meeting to sort out what exactly they want to do about this whole situation. Polyamory is hard because it requires so much mindfulness of everyone involved. But they all manage to admit that they’ve been harboring some softer feelings for Boscha and decide to test those waters. And maybe have a little fun with those tests as they do so. They maaaaayybbeee make it a competition to see who can make Boscha blush the hardest. They can all be quite competitive.

Boscha suddenly finds herself at the center of a Willumity Flirt-Off that she was NOT prepared for and doesn’t know how to handle it. All three of them are suddenly winking at her when she catches them looking at her, or maybe sitting way too close at lunch, or even just complimenting her when she doesn’t expect it and she nearly passes out from the attention. I think there’s a moment when she actually walks into a door when the girls realize they’re maybe taking this too far and apologize to Boscha before asking her if she wants to try being in their relationship with them. And I think Boscha does pass out at that.

I think it’s a tough adjustment period for them all. Balancing the four of them takes a lot time and fine-tuning to get it right. Boscha’s still just bewildered that she’s come so far with each of them enough to actually be in a relationship with each of them equally. There’s definitely some jealousy here and there, some old fears of being left behind cropping up, but all of those worries are thoroughly stamped out once they’re addressed. I think they all try very hard to get this to work and they do make it work. Boscha forever considers it the most dramatic year of her life.

I literally cannot even begin to get into proposals this is far too long already but thank you so much for sticking around if you’ve made it this far!!!!! This one in particular got hella long because there were so many moving parts @-@

I’ll be the first to admit: I’ve never been in a polyamorous relationship myself (I’ve never had any polyamorous partners before ;v;). I do know how important communication and establishing individual relationships can be though. It’s always so important to make sure that you and your partners are on the same page before doing anything that can dramatically affect your relationship. Consulting individuals within the relationship is also important. Just because you’re in a group doesn’t mean your relationship with each individual is any less important.

Ngl, this was also kind of hard for me to write because I truly don’t know what Boscha’s like when she’s not a bully. We haven’t seen that much of her character outside of her being a bully that thrives on fear and praise. She could very well be just as much an over dramatic dork as Luz. I don’t even think she knows; she’s been a bully her whole life. What is your personality like when you realize you don’t have to be a bully??? Idk, but that’s why this took me all weekend to write; I really don’t know how Boscha is outside of being a bully. Hopefully we get to see who she is in season 2!!!!!

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canarygirl1017 · 5 years ago

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Hands On Me - Chapter 1

Pairing: Reader / Jungkook

Genre: College!au, fluff, mild angst, smut

Length: 4,341k words

Warnings: language, sexual themes

Summary: You’d never had much luck with relationships, and experience had taught you to shy away from physical intimacy. But when you started dating your neighbor, Jungkook, you began to think he was worth the risk. College AU.

A/N: Next chapter coming soon. I originally wrote this a few months ago based on a prompt I got from my writer’s group. It was supposed to be college based romance, couple’s first time together, mildly angsty, and include the dialogue “Do you want to break up?” I sort of vaguely pictured JK when I was writing the male lead, at least visually, so I thought I would post it as a reader fan fic, which I’ve never written before. I usually write Marvel fan fic at AO3 in third person (not second person) so this isn’t as natural for me. Also, this is just for funsies because I don’t do real life shipping with real life people, though I do enjoy reading some of the well written fics I’ve seen in the fandom. If people enjoy this one, I might post more as I have a lot of short story prompts I’ve written for my club and don’t do anything with.

Chapter 1

Snuggled up on the sofa watching TV together was how you spent most evenings with your boyfriend, Jungkook. You did a quick clean that morning in anticipation of him coming over since he seemed to prefer being in your space, though it hardly mattered; home was just a few doors down regardless of which apartment you chose to spend time together in.

You shifted your attention from the book you were reading to Jungkook’s profile, fingers itching to trace the sharp jawline that attracted so many women to the gym where he worked as a part-time trainer while he finished university. He also needed a haircut, but he’d shrugged off the suggestion when you mentioned it earlier that week. The slightly longer, inky black locks suited him though.

He was focused on the basketball game that had gone into overtime, his thumb absentmindedly stroking against your hip as you leaned against him. Being close to him was a double-edged sword lately and a reminder that he hadn’t really touched you in a while. Not since that night a few weeks ago.

When you first started dating three months ago, he’d been very physical with you. Dates that ended with kisses at the door had quickly turned into dates that ended with making out on the sofa at his apartment or yours. But during one very heated session on his sofa you got nervous, suddenly worried that things were moving too fast, and you pulled back. To his credit, Jungkook backed off immediately, assuring you that he was fine with following a slower pace.

Your high school boyfriend had pushed for sex and against your better judgment, you’d slept with him after the senior winter formal, only to be devastated when he moved on less than a month later. Similarly, your last boyfriend had been very pushy about sex, and your reluctance was a bone of contention between you until he broke it off.

At twenty-two, Jungkook was a year older, and you knew that he was much more experienced. You’d been neighbors for almost a year now, and you’d seen several of the girls he dated coming and going during that time. You’d never spoken to one another outside the occasional hello in passing until the night you came back from work to find your ex-boyfriend, Mike, drunk and pounding on your door.

Since you didn’t want to let him into your apartment, you stood outside to talk to him. Apparently offended that you wouldn’t let him in, he’d begun berating you loudly enough to have a few neighbors popping their heads out to see what was going on. And in the middle of that embarrassing situation, Jungkook and his friend walked up.

“Hey y/n,” Jungkook said. “Sorry we’re late.”

He slipped an arm around your waist, startling you, though you couldn’t deny you were grateful for the interruption.

His friend chimed in, holding up a takeout bag. “We brought dinner.” You’d seen him around campus and remembered that his name was Jimin.

Mike had eyed Jungkook, as if sizing up a potential fight. But while he had an inch or two on Jungkook in height, Jungkook was all lean muscle and without question the stronger of the two. So, he had backed off, but not before firing off a parting shot. “Good luck with the virgin. Cold fish bitch.”

Your cheeks were burning as he walked away.

Jimin broke the silence. “What an asshole. Does he do this a lot?”

You shook your head. “This is the first time I’ve seen him since we broke up.” You could only assume the alcohol had made him think that you were a potential booty call.

Jungkook frowned as he stepped out of your personal space. “Sorry if I overstepped. I know it’s not my business, but I didn’t like the way he was crowding you at the door and yelling at you.”

“No, I appreciate you getting rid of him,” you answered. “Thank you.”

Jimin held up the takeout bag again. “We really do have dinner. Do you want to join us? Maybe it’s better if you’re not here alone in case he decides to come back.”

You hesitated, but then your stomach growled, a reminder that you hadn’t eaten since breakfast because of a hectic day of classes followed by work at the campus library.

Jungkook smiled. “We’ll take that as a yes.”

You became friends with Jungkook after that night. It was amazing how quickly you’d felt comfortable around him. He was kind and friendly, and he frequently helped the elderly residents of your building. Then one night after he’d shown up at the campus library and walked you the few blocks home, he kissed you. It marked the beginning of your new relationship, and you’d been inseparable ever since.

Unlike the few other guys you had dated, Jungkook had never directly brought up the topic of sex, nor had he pushed for it. You’d had a brief conversation one night about your respective exes. You knew he’d had one serious relationship that ended when he moved away for college and the long-distance relationship proved to be too much of a strain. He’d only dated casually since then, though you’d seen some of his overnight guests leaving his apartment the morning after.

Jungkook knew you’d had a boyfriend in high school, but you hadn’t gone into the details of the breakup. Though it was several years in the past, that rejection still stung, and you didn’t like to talk about it. He’d never asked about Mike other than to ensure you weren’t being harassed. You supposed the drunken scene he and Jimin had witnessed was explanation enough.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you failed to notice the game had ended until Jungkook spoke. “You’ve been doing that a lot lately.”

You looked up to see him watching you, an unreadable expression on his face. “Doing what?”

“Completely zoning out,” he replied with a half-smile. “Is something bothering you?” His chocolate brown eyes studied you intently.

“No,” you said quickly. Maybe too quickly because you could tell he didn’t quite believe you. His tongue pushed against his cheek, something he did when he was thinking about how to deal with a problem.

After a moment, he nodded. “Okay.” He stood up and stretched. “I should get going. I have an early client tomorrow.”

Saturdays were always busy at his gym, and he sometimes worked longer hours on the weekends. “Do you have clients tomorrow night?”

“One,” he confirmed as he pulled on his leather jacket. “Jen’s birthday party is tomorrow, right?”

You nodded as you walked to the door with him. “We’ll be at Carmen’s.” Jen had been planning her birthday for months and wanted a venue with good food, music and dancing. The trendy bar had only been open for about a year, but it was popular for the menu, which included themed cocktails, and the Latin music. You’d been looking at salsa dancing tutorials on YouTube because you were sure that your best friend would insist on hitting the dance floor.

“Okay. Jimin and I will swing by around ten.”

Jimin and Jen were involved in a casual flirtation that they both enjoyed, though you weren’t so sure it was really going anywhere. Jimin was a handsome transfer student studying modern dance, which took up a lot of his time, much to the disappointment of the single girls on campus. And for the two years you’d been friends, you had never known Jen to date anyone seriously. Still, Jen had heavily hinted that she wanted Jimin to come to her birthday party, and so you had told Jungkook to bring him.

“Okay.” You tilted your head back as he leaned down to kiss you goodbye.

You loved kissing him – the way his hands settled on your hips, and the way the first gentle brush of his lips against yours always gave way to slow, deep kisses. Your hands drifted down his chest to his waist, clutching the material of his t-shirt to ground yourself.

It would be so easy to get swept away. By the heat that flared between you. By your feelings. You knew without a doubt that you had fallen hard for him.

Jungkook pulled back, kissing the top of your head before releasing you. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

You closed the door behind him and locked up, leaning your head against it for a moment. You were beginning to regret letting him leave every night even if you weren’t sure if you were ready for more. You wanted more, but you were afraid of it too. And you had no idea what to do about it.

_________________________________________

You nibbled your bottom lip as you sat on Jen’s bed, watching your friend dig through her closet. “Do you think I should…” you paused, wondering how to broach this topic. While Jen had few conversational barriers, you were more hesitant to talk about sex.

“Should what?” Jen asked, her tone distracted as she pulled out another dress and tossed it over the chair at her desk. She tapped her well-manicured nails against the wall as she studied the contents of her closet before pulling out another dress and dropping it on the chair.

You glanced at the pile of dresses accumulating on the chair. “I thought you were going to wear that new dress you bought last week?”

“This isn’t for me,” Jen stated. “This is for you.”

You failed to contain a snort of laughter. “You’re like six inches taller than me. And I have a dress.” It wasn’t new, and Jen had complained that the dark color washed you out the last time you wore it. But unlike Jen, whose wealthy parents supplied her with credit cards and charge accounts around the city, you couldn’t afford to waste money on clothes. Your parents helped when they could, but you also had three younger siblings still at home and college was only possible because of your scholarships. Living in the city was also expensive; if not for Jungkook contributing to your groceries since you often ate together, you’d probably be eating ramen five nights a week.

“And I’m a fashion design student, so I have time to alter one of these. If I have to see you in that funeral dress again, I’m going to burn it. Worse, do you really want Jungkook to see you in it?” she shuddered as she tossed another dress on the chair. “Okay, I think these are the best options. Now, what were you asking? Do I think you should what?”

You hadn’t considered that Jungkook might also hate that dress. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to see what Jen had in mind. Arguing with her was next to impossible anyway.

You helped Jen hang the dresses on a clothes rack in the corner so you could see them better. “Do you think I should sleep with Jungkook?”

Jen raised a brow as she glanced over at you. “Hell yes. Have you talked about it?”

You shook your head. “No. I kind of… I don’t know. Freaked out a little bit a few weeks ago when we were kissing and stuff. It seemed like we were headed there, and I wasn’t sure I was ready, and I know I totally pulled a one eighty on him. And now he barely touches me.”

“Huh.” Jen considered that for a minute. “So things are weird now? Are you afraid he’s going to break up with you or something?”

You hadn’t really thought about that. “I wasn’t, but now that you said it, maybe.” You had mostly been worried that if you broke up after sleeping together, he’d be that much harder to get over because you knew that you’d be more attached to him then than you already were. But maybe that worry – that he would leave because you were holding back – had been there all along.

“I’m not saying he would do that,” Jen hurried to add. “I’ve seen how he acts around you, and how he looks at you. I really think he’s one of the good ones. But with your past experiences, I can see why you’d be worried. Has he ever been pushy about it?”

“No, never. When I told him that I thought we were moving too fast, he said he’d follow my pace. Only now, we’ve just kind of stalled out.”

“I guess he’s waiting for you to do something then. Like give him a signal that you want more.”

That could be it too. “I don’t really know how,” you admitted. “I have one night’s experience to draw from, and that was years ago.”

“That wasn’t an experience, y/n, that was a sexual travesty.”

You couldn’t argue with that. “He’s experienced though. I’m sure he knows how to make it good for me, but I don’t know how to do that for him. What if I’m bad in bed?”

“First of all, you have no idea how you are in bed because you’re practically still a virgin. Second, men are easier to please when it comes to sex anyway. Jungkook likes you. It’s easy to tell that he has real feelings for you, so I think there’s zero chance that he wouldn’t like sex with you. You really need to talk to him about it.”

You felt your cheeks heat up just thinking about trying to talk to him about this. “I know. I’m just embarrassed.”

Jen rolled her eyes. “If you can’t talk about it, you probably shouldn’t be doing it. Or I guess you could take the easier route and wear something that does the seduction for you. Like this.” She held up a deep red halter neck dress. The low neckline and back ensured maximum skin exposure. Jen was tall and had long, dark hair so on her, it probably looked fabulous.

Eyeing the dress with skepticism, you said, “That dress is your style, not mine. I’ve never worn anything like that before.” Your style could best be described as casual. On date night, you managed flirty casual, and Jungkook didn’t seem to have any complaints. This dress was on a whole other level, though.

“We can make it your style. I’ll make sure it’s not too revealing if that’s what you’re worried about.” When you still hesitated, Jen added, “Come on, Jungkook will forget how to talk when he sees you in this. I guarantee that you won’t have any trouble getting him into bed if that’s what you decide you want.”

The idea of surprising Jungkook with something like this was appealing. Maybe shaking up your image for one night would give you the confidence to talk to him about your relationship.

_____________________________________

Jungkook stifled a yawn as he entered Carmen’s. It had been an exceptionally long day, and he wished this was a regular Saturday night like the ones he usually spent with his girlfriend, y/n. He liked being in your apartment because your sofa was comfortable, you had an old record player and some killer albums that you’d collected since middle school, and your essential oil candles made everything smell nice.

Jimin had been teasing him for a couple of months now, calling him domesticated. He supposed he was because before meeting you, he rarely spent a Saturday night in. If someone had told him then that he’d soon trade beers at his favorite bar for candles and snuggling on the sofa, he would have laughed.

And since Jimin rarely got him out on a weekend anymore, and Jen had equal complaints about you, he doubted either of you would get away with ducking out early.

“Are they upstairs or downstairs?” Jimin asked.

“Downstairs, I think,” he replied.

He let Jimin lead the way. It was crowded downstairs, and he first searched the booths and bar area, expecting to find you chatting with friends. You always said dancing in public made you feel awkward unless you were drunk, and since your alcohol tolerance was low, you usually didn’t drink much.

“I see Jen on the dance floor,” Jimin said. “Did you find her?”

“No.” Jungkook scanned the dance floor, briefly pausing on a petite girl wearing a red dress before looking back at the booths. “Maybe she’s in the bathroom.” He pulled out his phone to call you.

“Wait, is that y/n?” Jimin suddenly asked.

Jungkook glanced up from his phone. “Where?”

“That girl in the red dress.”

He looked back at the dance floor for the girl in red, ready to deny it. Except she’d turned around now, and Jimin was right. Holy shit.

“Damn. I know I’ve been giving you a hard time lately, calling you domesticated. I’ll shut up now because if I knew I was taking her home later, I’d be domesticated too.”

Jungkook glared at Jimin. “Whatever you’re thinking, stop.”

Jimin’s expression was sheepish. “Sorry, man. I’m going to hell for impure thoughts, but so are half the guys hanging around her. You might want to worry more about them.”

Jungkook was already on the move as he’d noticed the same thing. Shouldering past two guys trying to dance up behind you, he gave them a look that ensured they backed off. Your back was facing him, and he swallowed hard as his eyes drifted down from your shoulders. The dress draped in the small of your back, leaving a bare expanse of skin, and his fingers literally itched to touch you.

He gave in to the urge, sliding his hand along your waist lightly to get your attention. You turned your head, brows furrowed as you flinched away from the unexpected touch. But when you saw it was him, you smiled and wrapped your arms around his waist.

“You’re here,” you said, tilting your head back to look at him. “I’ve been waiting forever.”

He smiled at your uncharacteristically dramatic tone. “Sorry. I forgot my bag, so I had to run home to change. Are you having fun?” You were pressed close against him on the crowded dance floor, and he was enjoying the feeling of your small body against his. He let his hands settle on your hips, thumbs rubbing light circles. You shivered in response. “Are you cold?”

“No. That just feels good,” you said with a sigh. You toyed with the top button of his long-sleeved white Henley.

He wasn’t used to you being that direct about what you liked. And when your hands suddenly wandered under his leather jacket and ran up his back, he suppressed a shiver of his own. “I think you’re drunk, baby.” He pulled you closer, trying to ignore the teasing glimpse of cleavage revealed by your dress. Your hair drifted around your pale shoulders in loose waves, and all he could think about was running his fingers through it as he kissed you.

“Maybe a little bit,” you admitted, scrunching your nose as you smiled up at him. “The cocktails are really good here.”

God, you were adorable. He’d never met another girl that he wanted to simultaneously fuck senseless but also protect and cuddle, though the former urge was winning out tonight. He’d never imagined you wearing a dress like this, and he knew it would be fueling his fantasies for quite some time. It had to be Jen’s influence, though he certainly wasn’t complaining.

As if reading his thoughts, Jen suddenly sidled past him on her way to the bar. “You’re welcome.”

For the next three hours, you divided your time between the dance floor and the bar, and Jungkook was content to follow behind you. You danced slowly together regardless of the beat, and he finally allowed his hands to stroke your bare back. You kept tilting your head back, inviting his kisses, and he was happy to indulge you. He was so turned on he could hardly think straight, but he knew he needed to keep a tight rein on the situation. The last thing he wanted was a repeat of that night a few weeks before when you had all but run from his apartment.

When you got a bit unsteady on your feet, Jungkook ordered water and fries at the bar before leading you to the booth where Jimin, Jen and a couple of other friends were talking. He could tell you were starting to fade as you finished the water and food. When you yawned and leaned against him, he kissed the top of your head. “I think it’s time we got you home.”

You hummed in agreement. Jen tossed him your jacket from the corner of the booth, and he helped you put it on. The cab ride back home was long enough for you to fall asleep in his arms. He savored every minute, stroking your hair gently, lulled by the sound of your breathing and glad that you had shaken off the pensive mood you’d been in the night before.

Jungkook was observant enough to realize that something was worrying you lately. While it bothered him that you wouldn’t tell him what you were thinking about, he worried that the relationship was still too fragile for him to push when it was obvious that you didn’t want to talk about it. Still, it was becoming increasingly difficult to let it go because he was concerned that it had something to do with him.

He wondered if it was about sex. Ever since that night he’d intervened when your ex showed up drunk, he’d wondered about your relationship with him. Something in the past had made you nervous about physical intimacy, which he’d realized after you ran out of his apartment that night, and he’d been very careful not to do anything that might make you run again. More and more he wished he’d punched that asshole, feeling certain he was somehow to blame. He’d deserved that and more for the name calling alone.

When you arrived home, Jungkook paid the driver and helped you from the car. Upstairs, he unlocked your apartment, smiling when you kicked your heels off and the effort sent you stumbling sideways. He steadied you before removing your jacket and draping it on the arm of the sofa. You walked to your bedroom and he grabbed some water from the kitchen before following you.

“You don’t feel sick, do you?” he asked, placing the water on your nightstand.

You shook your head as you sat on the edge of the bed and reached out a hand to him. “No.”

He took your hand and sat next to you. “You should change before you go to sleep, so you’ll be more comfortable.”

“You like the dress, right?” You nibbled your bottom lip as you peeked up at him through your lashes.

Understatement. “You look beautiful,” Jungkook said quietly, pushing your hair off your shoulder. His breath caught when you turned her cheek toward his palm and rubbed against him like a sleepy kitten.

“Then kiss me,” you whispered.

He hesitated, but you were already reaching for him. The kiss was like throwing a match on kindling. Then you scooted back to lie down and pulled him with you.

This was dangerous and he knew it, but he ignored the niggling little warning in his head because he’d been thinking about kissing you like this all night. He pressed against your soft curves but kept most of his weight off you as slow kisses turned more passionate. And when your hands grew bolder, running across his chest and back and tugging him closer, he gave in to the temptation, pulling you more fully beneath him.

When you parted your thighs, allowing his hips to settle between them, he dropped his head to your shoulder with a groan. Pressing kisses against your neck, he willed himself to calm down. “Baby, we should stop.”

You responded by pushing your hips up against him, and he bit back a curse. He was fully hard now and stopping was the last thing he wanted to do, but he knew it was the right thing. Jungkook braced his weight on his forearms and took a breath as he stared down at you.

“But I want you to stay,” you said, threading your fingers in his hair. Your eyes seemed much darker in the dim light of the bedroom. Your small hands drifted down to his shoulders, kneading, and then moved further down to toy with the hem of his shirt.

Jungkook closed his eyes and took another deep breath, the light fragrance of your perfume doing nothing to help him regain control. As much as he wanted you – had wanted you from the first night he kissed you - he didn’t want your first time together to be after a night of drinking. If there was even the slightest chance that you might regret it later, it wasn’t worth it.

He gave in one last time, kissing the spot beneath your ear that always made you shiver. He darted his tongue out to taste you and then captured your lips for one more long, slow kiss. “Not tonight.”

You didn’t argue anymore, allowing him to pull away. You were quiet as you got up and took some clothes from the dresser before going to the bathroom to change. When you returned, your face was clean, and you wore the usual pajama pants and t-shirt you preferred to sleep in. You didn’t say anything as you slipped past him to crawl back into bed and pull the covers up.

“You’re sure you feel okay?” he asked.

You nodded, your eyes already closed. “I’m just tired.”

He brushed his hand over your hair and leaned down to kiss your forehead. “I’ll lock up on my way out. I’ll give you the key back tomorrow.”

“Okay.”

Jungkook hesitated for a moment. Something seemed off somehow. Awkward, maybe. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He turned off the light and let himself out, making sure to lock the door behind him.

#college au #jungkook x reader #bts imagines #jungkook fanfic #jungkook smut #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook x you

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littlemisslol-fic · 4 years ago

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Okay, So.

To get it out of the way, I’m going on hiatus. I don’t know when I’ll be back, maybe soon, maybe in a month, idk, depends on what’s up. I’ll keep it short and sweet, some not-so-kosher shit went down with someone who used to be a fan of mine, and it quickly turned into some pretty bitter, ugly stuff from them, and in general it kinda messed with me pretty badly. Won’t get into the gritty details, but let’s just say it was nasty and (at least in my opinion) pretty uncalled for seeing as I’ve never spoken to them one on one, only in passing on discord. I’m also fairly sure that personal DMs between myself and another third party were shared without my consent, meaning that third party deliberately came to interrogate me in my DMs on discord with the intent of trapping me into saying something that could be taken out of context for… the lulz? Idk why to be honest, but crazy is as crazy does.

Long story short a lot of the joy is long gone after that lol. I’ve been trying to push myself through the slump with brute force, because that’s what I usually do, but my word count’s dropped right into the toilet, and with the addition of going back to work full time... it’s just too much for me to keep up with.

But yeah TL;DR ya girl had about a two week long breakdown and that ain’t healthy, especially since (and I say this with all my love) I have more important stuff to deal with.

So FAQ:

Are you quitting the fandom? Nope. Gunna keep writing smaller projects probably, but for now I have to step back for my own health.

Is Kindling Discontinued? Also no. But I am taking a break for an… undetermined amount of time. Gunna lay off the fantasy epics until I feel a little more put together again.

Why are you letting it bug you? Because it was unprompted on my part. I wrote fanfiction, and that was enough for some asshole to attack me as a person. Y’all gotta understand that everything I put in my fics are things that I feel confident including, but ever since that... incident I’ve been feeling paranoid and unconfident in my content. And I’m sure that’s exactly what they want, which is why I tried to keep going despite them. But brute force will only go so far emotionally, and I straight up am not having a good time lmao

What About Cor Meum? You’d have to chain me to a radiator to get me to stop working on that particular fic. Kindling got the shelf because it’s the one I have full control over, and also Rowboats in general is kinda an unhappy place for me right now, because my lovely hater used a fan project they were making for Rowboats to make all their snide little comments towards me.

Why are you being so dramatic? Because I’m sad and hurt and my mom raised me to be a dramatic bitch, let me have this.

What next? Dunno, gunna vibe for a bit. Been writing some oneshot stuff but that’s more for funsies, but it’ll still be content. I want to finish Kindling, I promise, but for now it straight up is too much for me to deal with. When I come back to it it’ll probably be more of a “upload when I want” thing instead of the rigid upload schedule.

So, uh. Sorry all. I’m just a person trying to have fun here, but I know that a lot of you had high expectations of me, and I’m sorry I couldn’t meet them. I tried, and I've been running myself into the dirt trying to keep up- but something just isn’t working, and I can’t keep acting like I’m okay. So I need a break, and I feel that after six months of producing content I kind of deserve one.

I hope y’all understand.

#rant #I guess? Idk it's more information so I don't have to make a post on ao3 #either way #on haitus #see you... around #this blog still is gunna run #because it's just kind of my tangled fanblog atm anyways #so reblogs still happen #just don't expect any new content from me until I can compartmentalize someone hating me so much over a goddamn fanfiction #also #if you're hate reading this #delightful asshole #I hope you're fucking proud of yourself lmao

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littlelasagne · 4 years ago

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I like the plot and relationship development in the last chapter. No matter how much I love the fluff of the previous chapters, it felt dragging to me so I love how "roughing someone up" and Levi's ex was mentioned in the last chapter as kind of like a plot twist. Oh and the sexual tension because Levi wasn't able to notice how comfortable he has become being near Hanji! And how Hanji's heart has to take being so close to Levi but being afraid to show her feelings! Will be waiting for the next chapter!

Hello! Thank you for messaging :D and I’m so glad you’re enjoying the fic.

There’s so many positives here, for which I am grateful, but omg I have wondered if readers will think it’s dragging (because I’ve uploaded so much and it’s like, just kiss already man!!) and now you’ve mentioned it, i’ll say a quick something just in case anyone else feels the same.

I wanted to write about Hange and Levi’s relationship changing from friends to ~something more~ This takes time (and it took literally years in the manga, and obv the manga is my holy source material that I’m taking cues from) and I want it to feel organic for what I headcanon with both these characters.

Either way, I’m having fun writing. I work in kids publishing so I spend all day writing, reading, editing and proofing kids books. This is my first ever venture into writing for ‘grown ups’, so honestly, I’m having an absolute blast testing things out and being FREE to swear and mention remotely adult things. And this is fanfic, so there aren’t any added pressures of ‘omg will this sell’ because I’m doing this for funsies. I also wrote most of this without any intention of uploading it online, so as you can probably tell, it is very VERY VERY self indulgent and the slowest of slow burns.

So basically, there is a lot more to come and I’m glad you picked up on some of those things because they will be explored sooner than you think!! I didn't mean for this to be so long oops. Thank you so much for sending me this ask and all the lovely comments. I do want to talk more to everyone so do send me things :)

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iridescentjin · 4 years ago

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Broke for Halloween

Summary: Person A and Person B have moved in together just in time for Halloween. Hosting their first Halloween party seems like a good idea until they realize that funds are rather low. Creative DIY decorations last minute makes for an interesting evening.

Genre: Fluff...comedy? maybe? I don’t know it’s just silliness

Warning: recreational alcohol usage

a/n: This is my contribution to the BTS Writing Cafe “Promptly Yours” collaboration. (this is unedited as always)

WC: 1.9k

Living with Hoseok had proven to be a lot more fun than you had thought that it would be. He was a friend of a friend, and both of you were looking for a potential roommate at the same time. You met once before you’d signed the lease on the tiny, slightly run down cottage that you lived in now. The bedrooms were tiny, the bathrooms were tiny, and the kitchen had very limited counter space. There was this charm about it and the overgrown backyard that made you fall in love with it.

Hoseok was an amazing roommate. He always cleaned up after himself and was a lot of fun to hang out with. Your lease started on October 1, and you were so excited to decorate the house for Halloween.

“What do you think about getting a black light?” you ask Hoseok while the two of you sit watching “Sabrina the Teenage Witch.”

“Just for funsies?” he asks, chuckling slightly.

“I mean...it would obviously be fun. But for Halloween. Duh.”

He turns to you and smiles. “Whatever you want to do is totally fine with me.”

You immediately pick up your phone and start to scroll through blacklights online. You sigh slightly to yourself. You’d forgotten that you need money to be able to buy things. While you had enough money to buy the blacklight, that would leave very limited funds for everything else. You had already told a couple of friends that you were going to have a party, without asking Hoseok, but you hadn’t really planned any details.

“Question,” you state toward Hoseok.

“Answer.”

“How do you feel about a Halloween party?” you ask, slightly tentative because you’re unsure what his feelings about parties are.

“Here? That would be awesome!” He smiles at you, and you can’t help but smile back at him.

The two of you immediately begin planning. You’re in charge of drinks and decorations. Hoseok is in charge of food and music. The two of you immediately get to work. You look at your bank account and, much to your chagrin, realize that most of your money is going to go toward the drinks alone. Moving isn’t cheap, and with deposit, first and last month’s rent, you were pretty tapped.

“Hoseok...I don’t have a ton of money for decorations.”

“I wish I could help out, but with the food that I’ll be buying, I’m pretty cash poor,” he gives you a strained smile, but you can see that it bothers him.

You think for a second. You know that your party would still be fine even without decorations, but you really wish that you were able to do something to make it more festive rather than just a house party. Then it hits you.

“I know!” you exclaim, grabbing Hoseok’s hand. “There are plenty of DIY decorations online. We can use my art supplies to make some!”

You look down at where your hands are joined, immediately flush, and pull your hand away. You look away from him and tuck your hair behind your ears.

“That’s a great idea. Can you find some crafts online? I’ll do whatever you need me to do, just let me know.”

You smile to yourself, and something in your chest flutters a little bit at his words. There was no denying that Hoseok was attractive, but you know that getting involved in any way with your brand new roommate might not be the best idea. So you admired from afar, keeping your thoughts to yourself.

The next day, your best friend, Seoyeon took you out for coffee. You hadn’t seen her since she helped you move at the beginning of the month, and it was nice to just spend time in her warm energy.

“So how is living with that hot boy going?” she asks after sipping her latte.

You choke a little bit on your hot chocolate. You weren’t ready for a question like that, though you should have expected it from her. She had a way of being crass and straightforward about things. She often embarrassed you in public because you were a lot more reserved than her.

“It’s uh...it’s good,” you say, feeling the heat rising in your face.

She laughs and takes another sip of her latte. You can see by the look in her eyes that she’s not going to let you off so easily. You avert your eyes from her, instead looking at the local art that is hung around the shop. Some of it is actually really interesting, and you think that if you had more money right now, you might buy one.

“It’s good, is it?” You can almost hear her raising her eyebrows as you stare intently at an abstract piece on the wall. “How good?”

“Normal good. Roommate good.”

She laughs, and you force yourself to drag your eyes back to her face. The smile on her face is not mocking, but it actually seems empathetic. You are grateful for your friend because, even though she will make fun of you at any given chance, she is still caring and a good friend.

“Look, something is up. What is it?” she asks, her voice kind and caring.

“I just...I kinda grabbed his hand last night and felt - I don’t know - felt something,” you feel the heat building in your cheeks, and you kind of wish that you could disappear into the floor.

The look in her eyes brings you some comfort. “It’s okay to feel attracted to him. It’s okay to like him. I know it’s complicated because he’s your roommate, but you’re allowed to feel your feelings.”

You try to absorb the words and tell her she’s right, but in the back of your mind you know that it would be unwise to try to take things any further with the man you’ve only lived with for a few weeks. It would be great if everything worked out between you, but, you tell yourself, this is just a little crush. It will go away.

The two of you finally change the subject and talk about the things going on in her life. After a while, you split to go your separate ways. You head toward the craft store to gather your supplies.

When you arrive home, you have bags of various supplies, you shout out to Hoseok as you walk in. He appears in the room, in sweatpants and a sweatshirt, looking slightly disheveled.

“I’m sorry. Did I wake you up?” you ask

“No, I was just napping earlier, and I’ve been kind of just lounging around,” he responds, rubbing his eyes slightly.

You lift up the bags and shake them slightly. “I got the goods.”

The two of you spend the rest of the afternoon putting together homemade pumpkins, spiders, and creepy things in jars. Several times, your hands brush each other as you reach for pipe cleaners or construction paper.

4 hours later, your entire living room is covered in glitter, and you wonder how long you will be finding pieces of glitter in your hair and on your skin. You look over at Hoseok, and he has a large piece of purple glitter right on his cheek.

“Hold still,” you say as you lean in toward him.

You gently pluck the piece of glitter off his check, and the two of you stay there, heads close together for a little while longer. You feel the heaviness of the moment, knowing that you could lean your head a little further in and press your lips against his. You consider it, but you decide that ultimately, it isn’t the right time for that. Your heart flutters in your chest as you pull away from him and turn back toward your crafts. You wonder if he is having as much difficulty not kissing you as you are not kissing him.

Three nights later, the party at your house is in full swing. All of your friends are there as well as people you don’t recognize. You assume that these are Hoseok’s friends, but maybe they’re just crashers. The drinks are flowing, the music is loud, and everyone seems to be having a good time.

After two drinks, you are feeling pretty loose. You are standing with Seoyeon, looking over at Hoseok dancing in the middle of the room.

“I’m gonna do it,” you slur slightly.

“Do what?” Seoyeon asks, not following your eye line.

“I’m gonna make a move on Hoseok tonight. I want to do it.”

Seoyeon giggles with glee and claps her hands. “Yasss!”

The two of you are clearly tipsy, but that’s part of the fun. You decide that when he’s done dancing, you’ll approach him. You wait patiently, sipping your third drink and munching on the snacks on the table. Finally, he breaks from the crowd dancing in the center of the room and makes his way to the kitchen.

Seoyeon gives you a little push in his direction, and you head toward the kitchen. You try to act casual, but the alcohol pumping through your veins makes you feel even more awkward than usual. You don’t remember how you normally walk or what you do with your hands when you’re just standing there. Maybe now isn’t the best time. Before you can turn around and change your mind, Hoseok catches your eye and beckons you over.

You close the space between the two of you, probably standing too close to him.

“I think this is going really well,” he comments, taking a sip from his cup.

“Yeah. I’m having a good time!” you exclaim. “You looked amazing dancing out there.”

He chuckles under his breath slightly, “Oh, thank you.”

“Listen, Hoseok, I’ve been thinking-” you start, but you stop when you see Hoseok’s eyes move behind you and light up.

“Oh! Yoongi! Come over here.” He motions with his arm to a man with black hair and a slight frame who has just walked into the light of the kitchen. “Yn, you have to meet Yoongi.”

The man comes over and slips into the space next to Hoseok. He sticks out his hand to you and smiles a friendly smile. You take his hand, feeling how cool and soft it is in yours. Like everything else about him, it seems almost unreal. You’ve never seen someone quite like him, and you’re slightly in awe of him.

Hoseok leans in and kisses the man’s cheek, and you feel your eyebrows furrow in confusion.

“Yn, this is my boyfriend, Yoongi!” he exclaims, looking so happy to be introducing the two of you. “Yoongi, I’m so happy you’re finally getting the chance to meet yn! You haven’t been over all month!”

You can’t help but laugh to yourself. You never even thought to ask if he had a boyfriend or a girlfriend. You just assumed that you would have seen them.

“It’s very nice to meet you, Yoongi,” you comment.

The lust that was running through your body for Hoseok fades into embarrassment and eventually laughter with the two men before you. Later that night, you tell Seoyeon how thankful you are that you didn’t ruin a relationship with your brand new roommate.

#promptlyyourscafe #btswritingcafe #btswritersguild #hoseok fanfic #hoseok fluff #bts fanfic

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m-u-n-c-h-y · 5 years ago

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Arthur and Abigail’s Relationship

To piggyback off of my Eliza Hot Take post, I have another fan theory/ramblings about the very interesting relationship between Arthur and Abigail. And no it’s not because they’re my guilty ship okay...

Everyone likes to talk about Arthur’s journal entry that appears at the “A Fisher of Men” mission. It’s a nice touch, in that, it establishes their close relationship and why Abigail trusts Arthur more than anyone to look after Jack.

However, everyone also has to take a second glance when Arthur writes about how he should have married Abigail. And while my guilty shipper heart would love to go down angst lane, let me be clear that my feelings towards this statement are similar to the last post I made.

Just like with Eliza, I don’t think it was out of romantic love.

Personally, I think a large part of Arthur caring for Abigail and Jack the way he does, is very much connected to Eliza and Isaac and his own guilt surrounding them. One could easily find this in canon and draw some parallels between Eliza and Abigail. Such as their young ages when they became pregnant (Eliza at 19 and Abigail at 17/18), or their status of being mostly single mothers with complicated relationships with the father of their children.

Now to make sure this doesn’t go off track, I’ll try to be focusing mostly on Arthur and Abigail’s relationship rather than Arthur and Jack’s. We can easily draw the Jack/Isaac parallel... because there is only one parallel. We know virtually nothing about Isaac except that he’s Arthur’s son, we really can’t draw too much between the two, but we at least know that Arthur definitely cares about Jack a lot, and a lot of that most likely stemmed from Isaac.

Anyway...

I believe that Arthur took a special interest in Abigail’s well being when everyone in camp found out about her pregnancy. Most likely because it brought up old memories of Eliza. And I can imagine Abigail being somewhat surprised by Arthur’s sudden helpfulness, but not being completely opposed by it due to her own lack of knowledge and understanding of motherhood, something no one is really prepared for honestly, but Arthur having experience, would help.

And when Jack’s born, the fact that Arthur actually knows how to handle a baby, unlike any of the other members of camp, is a weight off of Abigail’s shoulders (now whether she’s aware of Arthur having had a child isn’t stated in canon, and I personally think she didn’t as it seems Arthur never talks about Eliza and Isaac). She would have appreciated his help especially when John seems to be so... absent, both emotionally and physically. And probably set a high bar for how a father should act in Abigail’s head. Poor John didn’t stand a chance.

But really, I believe Arthur was doing all this for more than a little selfish reasons.

As I mentioned in my Eliza Hot Take post, Arthur would have carried over the guilt and bitterness of not being there for Eliza and Isaac as much as he should of. That his misunderstanding of Eliza’s rejection for marriage, culminated in even more self-loathing. And later, when they died, Arthur would’ve blamed himself for their deaths, for not being there like a father/man of the family should. The associated guilt, bitterness, and self loathing, coupled with the similarities between Eliza and Abigail I pointed out earlier, probably made him subconsciously start associating Eliza with Abigail, and after Jack was born, with Isaac.

Essentially, replacing them.

I think he saw Abigail and Jack as a means to make up for past mistakes at first. To be there for them like he hadn’t for Eliza and Isaac. And thanks to John’s disinterest in taking responsibility, it was rather easy for him to form a trusting and close bond with Abigail.

When John leaves, Arthur is obviously bitter about it, as he views it as an unforgivable act that he himself committed against Eliza and Isaac, which he believed got them killed. But I also think Arthur saw it as an opportunity to fulfill a want he’s had since maybe even before getting Eliza pregnant. To have a family of his own.

So, Arthur began making advances without realizing it. Yes, he had the intention to marry Abigail for a brief time, probably convinced it was to do right by her, something Arthur failed to do with Eliza because Eliza straight up rejected that notion. That Arthur was trying to insert himself as a father/husband figure into Abigail and Jack’s life, due to the guilt and bitterness he harbored and this need to make up for it. To get Eliza and Isaac to stop haunting him. However, I don’t think he was consciously aware that that’s what he was doing.

But, unfortunately for him, I think Abigail caught on, and being the “ride or die” kind of woman that rejected every man that tried to do the same after John ran off with his tail between his legs (her pov not mine), she rejected him too. And she rejected him just like she had rejected all the others, in that very blunt but very honest way that she does. Not that she does it to be cruel, but because, like Eliza, she cares about Arthur. That she doesn’t want to cause them more pain later down the line because they got together for the wrong reasons.

Personally, I imagine the scenario rather vividly, so this can be taken as my own version of how that rejection when down. You know... for funsies~

I can imagine Arthur taking Abigail and Jack out on a picnic of some sort as a little break from camp. It’s a nice day and the three are having a genuinely nice time for once, as the mounting frustration of camp duties and John leaving have been hitting them hard. When Jack waddles off within eye shot, Arthur makes a rather promiscuous comment about how Abigail hasn’t found a new man yet, sense at the time, it seems rather obvious that John doesn’t want to come back. There’s also this underlying tone of Arthur asking her why she hasn’t chosen him. A subtle thing that Abigail picks up on, because she’s seen it before while working as a prostitute.

And without missing a beat, she turns to him, looks him right in the eye, and says, “Mr. Morgan, I like you plenty. But I got this feelin’ that whenever you look at me, you’re lookin’ at someone else.”

And that... shatters Arthur.

It’s not the rejection that hurts initially, but the fact that Abigail made Arthur keenly aware of the fact that he was basically replacing Eliza and Isaac with Abigail and Jack. And as a result, even more guilt and self-loathing sprang up. Leaving him bitter at himself for thinking he could even do that and think it was okay. At Abigail for ripping that bandaid off so viciously (he can’t stay bitter at her for long, but sometimes it reers up without him meaning to). And, of course, even more bitter at John for having a woman like Abigail, for having that love he has craved for so long, but hasn’t gotten.

#rdr2 #red dead redemption #read dead redemption 2 #abigail marston #arthur morgan #abigail roberts #jack martson #RDR2 Eliza #Isaac Morgan #fan theories #headcanons #ramblings #I just like causing pain I guess #This is my guilty ship okay #I love the angst potential here #Poor John #He never had a chance lmao #got the munchy's?

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rosegm · 4 years ago

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[ ALISHA BOE , CIS FEMALE , SHE/HER ] shh ! ROSE GWENDOLYN MORRISON , the TWENTY - TWO year old THIRD year JOURNALISM major from OSLO , NORWAY , is known as a TOURMALINE around here. SHE was invited to join because OF HER DRIVE & HER SUCCESSFUL DETECTIVE WORK, and now, they’re here to stay. SHE reminds me of DRINKING RED WINE AND IT STAINING YOUR LIPS , A FURROWED BROW , & A PENCIL TUCKED BEHIND YOUR EAR .

hiiii friends !! i’m honestly SHOOK that i’m here ��and i’m so so excited to have the chance to plot and write with everyone !! my name is diana btw i’m 24, use she/her pronouns , & i’m from the est timezone ––– here’s my bb rose lil nancy drew angel & hmu on here or discord to plot some shiz !! @opalsmedia

––– backstory

rose was born in oslo, norway to a very middle class family. she grew up reading a lot, loving to learn, and overall just someone who was kind of a people person but also loved her alone time. one would say she had a fairly normal childhood, and she was someone who matured very quickly at a young age due to her love of literature and her perceptiveness.

everything really changed when rose was in a hit and run car accident with her parents and younger brother. she was 16 at the time, and her brother actually passed away due to the accident. after that, her family could never really recover. her parents grew fairly cold and distant, the house felt emptier without her little brother’s presence, and rose spent a lot of time grieving. however, when the authorities dropped the case of looking for the drunk driver who crashed into them, that’s when rose turned her grief into action and started looking into it.

she really figured out her talents and limits when she would charm the detectives to give her records and documents, she’d interview neighbors, and basically she cracked down the case with intention and drive and purpose to help her finally get closure.

ultimately, she actually found the driver, and he did confess to being drunk and accepted his punishment, though the process of getting him there was hard and long. rose made sure her parents got the closure and justice they deserved, though they never really appreciated rose for her efforts. to them, it wasn’t therapeutic, instead brought up memories both were struggling to move on from.

picking up context clues and putting puzzle pieces together, as well as being the one to see the truth in the situation and persevere is what made her interested in journalism. she applied to strathmore due to their excellent program, and ultimately got in due to her success story and the article she wrote that was published in her local paper about her success.

rose was brought into the society by philip, her predecessor, who is a huge role model for her. she’s curious and always asking questions and observant af, and now with poppy’s disappearance, especially someone from her year, rose is more determined than ever to solve this stuff, and won’t back down without a fight.

––– personality

actual definition of “she loved mysteries so much she became one”

she’s smart and oftentimes likes to open up just enough where people think they know everything about her but actually don’t know much.

she does have a good heart and has good intentions

she’s probably more headstrong than other tourmalines, but she’s also an expert at reading the room

horrible cook - mostly lives off pizza and frozen food

her secret talent is that she is v v good at chess & she did some competitive gymnastics at a young age

her favorite movie is interstellar. the flavor

despite everything pointing rose to being an introvert, she really is a people person too. loves to talk when she lets loose, loves to learn about people and hear their stories

she’s pretty good at catching someone in a lie

good at deception, tbh. she’s silent but lethal in the best way possible

can be snarky, loves to laugh

she never goes anywhere without a little notebook and a pen.

she takes her studies very seriously. like girl is a nerd

doesn’t really smoke or drink much but she’ll dabble in it 4 funsies

a hardcore slytherin & leans true neutral & gemini trash s m h

––– circlet relationships

since rose is so loyal, i truly imagine the circlet is her best friends and her ride-or-dies. even if they don’t have the best relationship, rose will always protect, even if it’s from a distance.

wanted connections

#opalsintro #wssup party people !!!!

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blindtaleteller · 4 years ago

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Gin being an Ass for a page (Quotes & Exerpts) [draft 1]

Rogers looked about as convinced down the negotiations table as the rest of the natural world probably had been when one of the previous rulers had claimed he hadn’t inhaled; and proved as much when he said “ You’re the god of lies. “ managing to push Loki’s face into a lean into one set of knuckles at the cheek “ Why should we-- “ and cut him off with a projected and exasperated “ Father. “

Which drew the blond’s brows immediately, along with a defensive “ What. “

“ I’m the father, of lies; you insufferable tit. Not, the God of. “ he waved two fingers briefly in dismissal kicking out before he could be interrupted. “ If you’d like to conceive a few; come down the table and bend over it: I’m certainly becoming mildly irritated enough with you to give it a try. Though! “ as he sat back in his comfortably padded seat at the end of the table to cut Fury off in particular, and stop Steve’s reddening face from spewing anything else along those lines. Well at least the Frenchman laughed, even if he was trying not to; once that had been translated for him. “ Given your particular brand of excess I wouldn’t be surprised if their quality was reduced to the label and boring effect of the very white sort, once birthed. “

“ I don’t see why you feel the ne-- “

“ Oh do shut up, Nick. “ Did work, if only because he was in a mood; and the cyclops still owed him big time. That and Loki wasn’t in the mood to continue along these lines; Rogers had been on it long enough. “ It’s a bloody waste of everyone’s time entertaining Rogers’ too late venture atop his soap box. And let’s not pretend, the Captain wasn’t attempting to defame me and my intent at this table farther than he already has in front of the rest of those powers present at the table by ignoring even your own historical literature on my background; mythical though much of it may be. Regardless of the fact that I myself bloody well helped write it with those here: yourself included.” Loki’s middle finger tapped at the arm-rest pointedly. ” Frankly, Rogers should not even be here in my opinion since we’re stating them. This isn’t, a bloody debate. This is an agreement; one we’ve already reached and have only to sign on. Not a difficult one, either. No more fucking nuclear bombs. From either side, now that I have a few of my own. “

TAP, and Rogers inhaled audibly.

“ No mass military aggression within the already taxed North American continent affected by the last bomb thrown in this general direction; outside, of the currently allotted space in our ‘neutral’ zones. Want to assassinate me? Fine and try. Seriously, good luck with that. Want to go to open war on my soil however and make things worse for those I rule.. fuck off, I will destroy you and be sure to return the favor tenfold. You lost. Mostly because you decided to try and kill every living thing in Manhattan. End-fucking-game. “ he waved that off though; that went both ways, as far as intent went. Unimportant.

TAP. That had been part of the discussions to get them here. “ Border defenses and checkpoints, of course allowed and encouraged for both. “

Another TAP, annoyance resounding with it down the table, and he heard Natasha shift on her feet behind him and to his right against the floor to wall ‘windows’ that gave them such a lovely view of the Chicago Skyline from up here. “ My remaining Chitauri will settle where they need, beneath the ground and out of the way of folk they otherwise have no great interest in anyway; there is plenty of room for that even with he dead zone along our easternmost coast: allowing both sides’ civilian populations the ability to recover properly without interruption, just as a start.”

His eyes landed on Rogers again.” So. Ending your bullshit: as my fiancee puts it? Unless the populace these terms protect mean that little to you as to continue without such agreements and punishments already set in ink, Captain: kindly shut up. You’re here as a witness, not as a world leader. A disruptive one, might I add. Another, can be obtained; if you should refuse. ”

Of course, the Russians still had and jumped in immediately with a few concerns; and he heard them as he and Steven had their not so subtle staring contest across the length of the table: but Loki was past caring about the stab behind that blue eyed gaze. About the opinions behind it too, and about the shift Rogers’ eyes made to latch onto Natasha where she stood silent against the windows behind his own high backed chair.

Loki didn’t have to look to know she was looking right back in those long seconds; and decided to smirk at him, just for funsies when Rogers did finally tear his eyes away from Loki’s bride to be. He might as well get something fun out of working up the framework for their very blatantly political marriage incoming. Maker knew neither one of them wanted anything else to do with each other in that regard. The look paid off with a scrunching of Steven’s brow; before their attention was called back to the current speaker with a very important question.

Loki took the moment Rogers looked back to him to flip the good Captain the two fingered bird with a smile before he answered; making certain no one else saw it of course. Illusion was some of what he did after all. And, the man seriously annoyed him; but he wasn’t worth risking any one of those present not signing, the same. “ Yes, we do still intend to continue pursuing Hydra outside of our borders.. “ They had something of his, after all; and just as a start...

#exerpts #drafts #DAMAGED PEEK #Gin #exerpts and quotes #Gin/Loki D5 #DAMAGED #Scar #snippets #Lokiverse #Lokiverse/Mixology

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cowtale-utau · 5 years ago

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Oohh I have a small idea. Demon girl finds the skeletons interesting and decides that she’s just gonna be their little protector mostly just for funsies. She also plays minor little pranks like sticking car keys to a wall or making the remote float around the room at various times. She doesn’t live in their house, just pops in sometimes and keeps an eye on them though they can’t always see her. How would the boys react?

Aight, fun with our lil Demon. So for this we're fast-forwarding a few decades outta the old west, which, as I've previously discussed, is still on brand. Monsters are long-lived, if not in some ways arguable “immortal” (in the ageless sense, immortal, not invincible). So jumping to a modern era is no hardship, and a lot of my writing is kept vague enough to place in anytime period anyway. So for my needing to keep track, we'll specifically say for this we're in the 21st century.

And haha, yeah, it's well known at this point that I have no self control whatsoever, so there are 24 skeletons. And I work on the other cast bit by bit, but they are there and technically also requestable.

Now, our demon friend, who we'll call “Dee” has motivations all their own. If asked, they claim that monsters tend to attract the worst sort. The sort no one really gets mad about if they become unwell or disappear. They'll staunchly deny and fondness or care for the skeletons, but don't let them fool you, they are quite attached. (this is entirely Lief's fault. Don't be nice to demons Lief, they never leave!)

Dancetale Sans/Shuffle & Dancetale Papyrus/Foxtrot – Dee isn't limited to human forms, and abuses this frequently. Shuffle is well known to be popular with stray cats. Another fact Dee exploits. Mostly by possessing one and then tripping him as often as possible. And he can't do much about it without looking like a total dick. So when he's not tripping over the cat, he's picking up things it insists on knocking down. He lets it slide, as once Dee possessed a member of security at one of Foxtrot's performances and managed to “deter” an aggressive human. Plus the tricky little being never messes with any of the kids in his classes, so it can be all bad.

Outertale Sans/Saturn & Outertale Papyrus/Mercury – Saturn is probably the one most annoyed by Dee. They have a tendency of moving the things that will most irritate Sat. Like his coffee. They'll rearrange papers and blueprints out of order, move coffee cups across the room, and even likes to hide keys in weird but “easy” places, like the hood of Saturn's hoodie. Mercury doesn't mind quite as much, and tries to take it in good humor, as Dee is also occasionally helpful. Things that have been misplaced turning up back on desks, and they've run off a few human aides that ended up having less than good intentions. The most notable was when a machine started to catastrophically fail, and the power cut out before it could blow, despite no one being anywhere near the power source. This is probably the only reason Saturn never put into practice those demon banishment techniques he looked up.

Farmtale Sans/Sage & Farmtale Papyrus/Thyme – Gates to animal pens are often left open, water spigots tampered with, feed bags have corners cut. Inconvenient but ultimately harmless little things. The animals never seem to stray further than just enough to be a nuisance, the animals all still end up fed, and well, if someone gets soaked, oh well, they'll live. Dee has also stopped fires, scared off crows, and run off ill meaning teens. Sage finds Dee's antics to he hilarious, while Thyme pretends to get increasingly more annoyed. Sage will sometimes leave small gold trinkets unattended for Dee to take, and although Thyme will act annoyed he does nothing to stop his brother.

G!Sans/Aurum & G!Papyrus/Viridis – Dee is both help and annoyance. It's a frequent game played, where Dee will lead them in some form or another (usually small animals) down the safest path through the ruins. But at some point will have circled back and dropped whatever they were looking for back in camp, making the whole trip a moot point. It's mostly harmless, as they enjoy the exploration regardless, and getting a clear, safe path makes further exploration easier. But it gets exasperating for the one specific thing they were looking for to already be in one of their packs. Dee however has never done anything to harm Aur or Vir, and has warned them of someone with dangerous intent heading their way. And if the occasional tainted soul has been dropped into some ruins where no one but the most tricky of beings could reach, well. That's between the three of them. Ace has given up on telling Aur not to feed the demon.

Fun fact for anyone who cares. Demons do not have genders or even physical sexes in their base forms. If they have a humanoid base form (not all do) then they tend to have Ken/Barbie syndrome. As for pronouns, they usually use they/them or it, or whatever the pronouns of the person they've possessed are.

Another fun fact, I haven’t mentioned if any of them have seen Dee’s true form, because I have yet to decide what that is. Whether they’re a humanoid-ish demon, and more animal-y type, or some other strange thing.

#Cowtale #ask #requests #Shuffle #Foxtrot #Saturn #Mercury #Sage #Thyme #Aurum #Viridis #demon #Dee the Demon

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a-very-fond-farewell · 4 years ago

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The forbidden crack! Untamed prompts: 18/?

University AU: “Negative Space”

[ok so, self projection is a bitch, but I am petty to myself on a regular basis so it’s ok]

[title is from the Japanese concept “ma”, which Wikipedia describes as:

“a Japanese word which can be roughly translated as ‘gap’, ‘space’, ‘pause’ or ‘the space between two structural parts.’ In traditional Japanese arts and culture, ma is more carefully defined as the suggestion of an interval. It is best described as a consciousness of a sense of place, with the ‘intervals’ suggested often being more than simple gaps, instead focusing on the intention of a negative space in an art piece.

Ma is not necessarily an art concept created by compositional elements, such as the literal existence of a negative space. Instead, the intention is often to create the perception of an interval in the viewer experiencing the elements forming an art piece, making maless reliant on the existence of a gap, and more closely related to the perceived experience of a gap.

Ma has also been described as ‘an emptiness full of possibilities, like a promise yet to be fulfilled’, and as ‘the silence between the notes which make the music’.”

Fun fact: “ma” also means “but” in Italian, which is what usually follows whatever intrusive thought may plague my mind. Eg: “I may be useless now, BUT just you wait until I get some dopamine to get me through this shitty times.”]

Wei Ying never asked for much in his life. He’s content with cleaning classrooms and toilets and nobody can beat him at wiping the marble floors if he works hard enough. Granny Wen, his supervisor, is slightly impressed with his ability to make the wood shine for ages to come. His nephew Jin Ling sometimes comes to check on him when he’s done with senior classes or cram school in the evening, and together they sit down and listen to whatever his older friends in music production came up with during the day. Jiang Cheng occasionally would ask him to keep him company while he grades papers and they bitch about ZiXuan and his inability to dote on their sister. The cafeteria ladies are always nice to him and they give him extra congee because they worry for his questionable consumption of spice products.

He’s fine, really.

So why can’t he stop wandering over to the science building these days? Looking for a clean board to use, for an equation to finally solve? Even if in the end he just takes the chalk in hand and simply stares down at the inky surface in front of him, unable to write. His mind working on a software too advanced for the hardware that constitutes his brain.

Thirteen years. It has been already thirteen years and yet it feels like yesterday, or like it never happened at all. Like it has yet to be. Time blindness is a bitch to deal with, yet dyscalculia and ADHD makes a joke out of you when you love math on a visceral level... but you burned too bright too fast and now you function on no data and with an even shittier signal. Having a burnout at 23 should have taught him humility instead of pride, but Wei Ying has always worked out of spite and certain habits are difficult to forget.

Couldn’t put the number in the right order, switching digits left and right since he was young? Fine. Numbers were concepts anyway, entire civilizations working their magic without even knowing what “zero” stood for. A brain steaming with a million ideas per second? Good. New connections brimming with ideas he could use to better the world.

It worked fine until he let himself down. Until he became a useless empty lighter, a wet match tossed out, carbon monoxide in the air.

Dropped out before finishing his very ambitious, highly dangerous for his psyche, thesis project. Aunt Yu never forgave him for that, not after paying for his advanced classes, not after trusting Uncle Jiang and supporting him despite his many flaws. What good is being first of your class every year, poster child of a teaching system done right, graduating bachelor at 21, if you can’t finish your master at 23 and get your PhD at 25 and start teaching by 27 and drive yourself insane in the process?

Wei Ying dropped out and didn’t finish his master, didn’t enroll in the teaching program, and let everyone down. His Uncle and Aunt looking down on him, whether out of pity or shame. Jiang Cheng may have been the one leaving him behind, but he used to be the one saying “you should have tried harder”. YanLi worrying over him when she should have focused on her career first. Jin Ling growing up with stories of his uncle “not being worth the money put into his education”, taught to not disappoint and make his family proud. The Jin side, that is.

And now the kid comes crawling in defeat to him instead of Jiang Cheng after bombing a test in high school. And they chat of what he would like to do and how much he likes sports and how much he despises the idea of getting a scholarship for that and being called stupid or something by his classmates. And he cries when he thinks Wei Ying cannot see him as he leaves the campus late at night.

Wei Ying didn’t even want to solve that impossible theorem he fixated on in his early twenties. His thesis project was inconsequential in the great scheme of things and his professor only wanted him to be his one trick pony in the end. No. Wei Ying wanted to teach math in elementary school, hell... even in kindergarten. He wanted to change the approach to the subject. Because numbers cannot be taught like language is and there are many ways to teach how to sum up digits and divide quantities and there are no rules on how to make sense of space either.

But how can he teach when even time eludes his senses?

Something that nobody can define, but certainly most perceive as linear... but not him. Not since his brain fried up in his attempt to function like a normal human being.

After thirteen years nothing has changed.

Until one day he hears something else aside from his usual intrusive thoughts and burdensome memories. A melody so quiet he almost mistakes it for the wind, coming from the music building.

He walks slowly, night surrounding him like the embrace of a friend as he makes his way to the traditional musical instruments room. The one where Jin Ling’s friends meet sometimes as they wait for the younger boy to join them. Wei Ying holds his breath as he spies through the gap of the door left ajar, neon light slicing his face like moonbeams as he peeks in and recognizes Jin Ling’s friends and another figure sitting on the ground, guqin on their knees.

But before he can lean in and breathe in the vibrant sounds all around, the door opens and music theory Professor Lan finds Wei Ying clutching his mop for dear life.

They said the man could see colors within the notes, that he despises language outside of his class or office and that only his brother, the history of art TA, could convince him to talk every now and then.

If numbers were created to measure space, Wei Ying firmly believed music had been invented to make sense of time and count its seconds in rhythm and notes, pauses and beats. Yet, time seems to stretch to a stop as the janitor focuses all of his attention on professor Lan’s stern face and his heart quickens its pace.

Wei Ying takes a rushed breath and dives right in with a weird sense of hope pumping in his veins. A small, timid voice whispering that life is not made to be atoned, but to move on and grow.

One step at a time.

“I’m Wei Ying, Professor Lan. May I listen while you play?”

Yes, maybe it will be enough just to let time flow at its pace.

Whatever rhythm that may be.

[some hcs down below]

WWX does not magically solve the math theorem. he may or may not help kids figure out how to use numbers on the long run tho. no, he will still work as a janitor and there’s nothing wrong with that.

yes, LWJ is autistic and stimms and finds WWX’s honesty soothing. yes, you can add your hcs on the matter. he has synesthesia, but more on the grapheme-color side of the deal than anything else and he sees certain letters/numbers/notes in different colors. people think he can see colors in music, but they misunderstood and thought he could recognize different hues while listening to music instead of reading it.

JC has grown since his uni years and doesn’t resent WWX anymore. he teaches astrophysics as a TA and doesn’t pressure his brother to pick his studies up anymore. WWX has mixed feelings about this: he feels he’s a lost cause, to the point not even his brother spurs him to best himself anymore, but he is grateful for the patience anyway.

LXC is the official LWJ translator of the campus along with their cousins SiZhui and JinGyi. he bonds with WWX and JC over how tired they are, seldom staring at flies roaming above them in the cafeteria bc none of them can even move. he lives on caffeine and regrets, but he’s getting better as he develops a love for his plant babies and tries to not let them die on a daily basis.

Wen Ning and Wen Qing are little overachievers and adrenaline junkies, hence their competitive streak on their way to their third master degree just for funsies. they scare people with how driven they are, but the juniors love them.

NMJ is the one to go to if you need to get away with murder, but JGY will actually be the one helping you dispose of the body. the fact that they both work in criminal law is somewhat both reassuring and disquieting. they hate each other and yet cannot stop hang out, they are close to 40 and need the rivalry to keep going anyway. nothing beats a good nemesis. not even sex. maybe.

NHS has failed his entrance exam to become a nurse too many times to count, but he is determined to see the end of it. even if he could potentially work in the family business, but he doesn’t know anything about managing an empire of bricks and he doesn’t care. if NMJ could run away, well, so can he.

MianMian is Wei Ying’s bestie and has the biggest crush on JGY’s sister A-Su the kindergarten teacher, but since they are childhood besties she doesn’t know how to approach her. she is Jin Ling’s idol and a certified boxer and refers to herself as a useless bisexual. Wei Ying boxes with her sometimes, she always win.

YanLi is an equestrian mum, but in the best way possible: she coaches children for shows and teaches them horses should be loved and feared equally and that if you want to shoot arrows from a running horse you should always, ALWAYS let go of the stirrups the moment the beast gets too unhinged to ride. JC fears her, WWX is only glad she didn’t train police dogs for a living.

ZiXuan actually loves his wife, but WWX and JC question his career choices and the fact that he’s a retired lawyer spending his family fortune while he’s a stay-at-home dad and does all the housework. WWX and JC believe he should give their sister a better life and work his ass off to deserve her, but he does make amazing rice cakes and keeps up with Jin Ling’s studies and is very supportive of his dreams.

A-Qing and Song Lan are siblings and sometimes bring JC food from the campus cafeteria where they both work at, while Xiao XingChen and his carer Xue Yang work with LXC for a project on accessibility for visually impaired visitors of the local museum. JC and LXC work to make Song Lan and Xiao XingChen fall for each other, but the youngsters are too protective to let them play matchmaker so easily.

[this is all for now. please, if you want, add your own headcanons!]

#mdzs #cql #the untamed #mo dao zu shi #mdzs/au: modern #mdzs/au: uni #the forbidden crack! untamed prompts #nieyao #xicheng #wangxian

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