#i was like aw shit here we go again
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Ok let me elaborate on this cause I have so many thoughts and I can’t sleep. I was brainstorming and planning a canon divergence fic where I basically explore the concept of Lance and Keith getting together very early in the series and how that would progress, and while I did that I naturally divided the POVs between them, so that Lance had the entire first half of the fic for his development and Keith had the entire last half for his development. At first, I couldn’t really explain why I did it this way, it just felt right to me until I thought a little bit more about it and I realized that thats literally how the show did it.
You see, in storytelling, there are a number of literary devices that authors and writers use to communicate to the audience who the main character is (usually the protagonist, but not always) and who they should root for. Traditionally this is done by either starting the story from their perspective and having them be the first one to appear or a little later on once the story has laid down the world building (where are we? What time is it? What are the rules? Etc.).
And in season one it was Lance. Lance is the main character of the first half of VLD. He is the first person to appear on screen after the flashback to the Kerberos mission (exposition that is relevant for the catalyst of the plot),
Every character after that is introduced THROUGH Lance: Pidge and Hunk are Lance’s teammates,
Iverson is Lance’s teacher at the academy he goes to,
Shiro is Lance’s mentor/idol
And Keith is Lance’s rival, respectively.
Especially Shiro’s introduction is damning, because he was in the prologue of the show but he wasn’t named as relevant until we got his relation to Lance (as someone whom Lance also wants to rescue). Prologues often depict side characters who are important for the main character to set up exposition before introducing the main character themself. This is also seen in Avatar the Last Airbender, where we see Katara and Sokka in the first five minutes of the show before Aang (the main titular character) is introduced. This is a basic storytelling method.
Furthermore, Lance is also the catalyst for the start of the plot. HE decides to look for pidge on the roof which sets off the following chain of events, HE decides to sabotage Keith’s rescue mission. But most importantly, HE finds the first lion (why not Keith, who has been looking?),
HE takes them all into space (why not Pidge, who is looking for her family?), and HE catches catches an ancient princess in his arms (why not Shiro, who is the leader?). And yet again we get another character who is introduced through their relation to Lance (as a potential love interest or object of affection).
And look at THIS frame!
he's literally in the foremost position out of them all! He's in the main character pose!
All of these things combined point to Lance being the Main Character in a show with multiple main characters (again, see ATLA, where Katara, Sokka Toph and Zuko all are main characters with their own character arcs, but whom all are introduced and maintained by their relation to the Actual Main Character, Aang).
What I find very interesting about VLD’s storytelling is that they set up a main character using basic literary devices TWICE in the whole series.
Not even in the third season, where Keith LITERALLY ASCEND TO THE BLACK LION AS LEADER OF VOLTRON, is the emotional focus on Keith as the main character. The very start of that whole arc is LANCE comforting and reassuring KEITH.
The focus is on LANCE overcoming his own ego to accept his rival as his leader! Literally after Keith is chosen they zoom in on lance kinda looking down and looking solemn.
And LANCE is the one who is trying to keep everyone together when Keith fails his leadership. LANCE being relied upon. LANCE yet again in the eye of the storm, the very center of the narrative.
UNTIL the fourth season. This is where shit gets interesting because they did the EXACT SAME THING with KEITH in the second half of the show. AND I MEAN EVERYTHING.
It all starts when Keith decides to join the Blade of Marmora, forcing another Voltron Shift of Roles. His decision has an impact and a consequence for the literal role of every other character in the series, just like Lance in the first half.
Side note: can i just say rewatching season 3 and 4 the way Keith keeps rejecting the leadership role and the way he literally verbally confirms that he's not meant to and was never meant to pilot the black lion.... idk why they (the showrunners) kept trying to force Leader on my guy he clearly did not want it.
The new characters introduced to the show are introduced through KEITH this time. Krolia is Keith’s mom, Kosmo is Keith’s wolf, Romelle is saved by Keith
and the most important of the MFE pilots (James) is introduced as having had conflicts with Keith when they were younger in the Garrison
(which sounds familiar…? This may have been the showrunners attempt to make a Lance character that they actually liked and who they originally intended Lance to be, before the writers took the wheel in the first half but idk that’s just a guess my point still stands), again, just like Lance in the first half.
btw this was the same episode they introduced adam and i had to close my laptop and take a walk before i could continue scavanging for screenshots
And again, just like how Lance was the catalyst for several important plot points in the story, so too is Keith for the second half. He is the catalyst for Lotor betraying Team Voltron and becoming the main Antagonist (before haggar….), Keith’s ascension to the black Lion becomes the focus and KEITH becomes the one to rely on (see: Hunk and his squeezed in arc that didn’t make sense).
Now this is actually a really interesting employment of basic storytelling if it wasn’t such a huge indicator for the division between the writers in the grander scheme of things. Since we all know that the showrunners intended for Keith to be the main character all along, the second half of the show actually just becomes a stark example of how they scrambled to redo the narrative all over again without having to start from scratch. But this resulted in a hot mess of a narrative, and plot holes the size of Jupiter, not to mention inconsistent characterization, character assassinations, rushed plot points, forgotten character dynamics etc etc.
In conclusion, Lance and Keith are the main characters of Voltron respectively, they always have been, because that's literally how voltron wrote them. thanks for coming to my ted talk
actually you know what i don't even blame fanfic authors and artists for focusing mostly on keith and lance in their character studies cause they're literally the main characters of the show. like that's how the show wrote them
#i had to reopen all of my trauma wounds for this ok#literally the minute adam showed up i GOT TEARS IN MY EYES#i was like aw shit here we go again#the thing is the first episode is actually so good !! it's funny !! it's intriguing !! and then the rest of the bullshit happens#voltron#klance#anyway i'm done i'm finished i'm never looking at another vld screencap ever again <- me when i lie
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as soon as i saw the barbie trailer mugshot meme i knew... these two would be a good fit
#they came to the real world and look what happened#dis is having a good time no matter what even if its being arrested with her brother#thorin on the other hand is like aw shit here we go again#barbie 2023#my art#thorin#thorin oakenshield#lady dis#tolkien#jrr tolkien#the hobbit#i know thorin is most likely 4'10 but im going with 5'2 bc im 5'2 and him being the same height as me makes me lol
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I DIDNT FORGET WHOSE SPECIAL DAY IT IS THO HAPPY BIRTHDAY SASARA 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡
#this is vee speaking#GET IN THE CLOWN CAR LOSERS WE CELEBRATING SASARAS DAY KING CLOWN HIMSELF#HAPPY BIRTHDAY SASARA!!!!!!! YOUVE COME SO FAR!!!!!!!#FACING TROUBLE HEAD ON AND STILL FINDING IT IN YOU TO SMILE IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY!!!!!!!#SEEING THAT YOU NEED TO BE ABLE TO SMILE WHEN ADVERSITY COMES YOUR WAY!!!!!!!!!#REALISING THAT BONDS ARE SOMETIMES SOMETHING YOU NEED TO FIGHT FOR INSTEAD OF LETTING IT FETTER OUT AS YOU WATCHED YOUR PARENTS DO#LIKE HE OVERCAME HIS TRAUMA WHILE COMING TO THE CONCLUSION LAUGHTER IS STILL THE ANSWER DESPITE EVERYTHING IS THAT NOT WHATS UP???????#IS THAT GREAT WAY TO GO SASARA SAN 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡#HERES TO BRINGING LAUGHTER TO THE WORLD!!!!!! REACHING THE TOP AND WITH YOUR COMBO YALL THE TRIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#HOPE CELEBRATING AT ROSHOS HOUSE WAS FUN LMAO AND I HOPE THE ALCOHOL REI GIFTED WAS TASTY#AND YALL GOT FADED LIKE SHIT I HOPE THE HANGOVERS AWFUL THATS HOW WASTED YALL GOT LMAO#HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡#c: sasara
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anyone that says emmrich never actually faces his fear isn't actually paying attention. hear me out, okay, i've talked before (so many times) about how i think for emmrich his fear of death is less actual thanaphobia and more...his fear of being alone. of living alone, of spending eternity alone - especially in a culture and a society that places emphasis on lovers being buried together; he's terrified of it. and a romanced emmrich is so terrified of his relationship with rook - and how he feels - that he's willing to try to end it on the eve of a battle one or both of them might not come back from, because he's worried it might not be the big damn love story he's been aching for his whole goddamn life.
and guess what! rook doesn't come back.
he spends almost a month making that damn dagger - and like the rest of the crew - trying to find rook to pull them out of the fade prison because he's lost them. he's lost them right after realizing his fear's gotten the better of him and he's staring down the barrel of eternity without them. he was already trying to backpedal the whole thing before solas pulled his switcheroo and you know rook telling him they'll talk about it at home was like...a constant refrain in his head that whole almost month they were lost.
(which raises a good point with the mortal vs lich path in this respect, because a mortal emmrich was ready to tear open the fade to get rook back, imagine how many lines a lich emmrich might cross, especially given his line about never letting them be parted in this or any other world again. i have thoughts about how emmrich doesn't come back wrong from that, no, but he definitely comes back changed, he's...off. i've seen speculation that lich emmrich isn't emmrich - which i don't buy - or isn't entirely emmrich - which is a little more interesting and there may be some truth to the latter, or it could be he thinks he's indestructible at that point and gets really reckless and less measured but that is another argument for another time.)
and basically the point i'm leading up to here is...you can complain all you want that he never uses the l word before the final battle, but even with harding pointing out he's gotten a little spacey and distracted and mopey with a relationship on the burner, and all the other pet names he uses so damn liberally (dearest, darling, flame of my heart), he's still holding a lot of stuff back. he's still holding himself back, quite a bit, until that moment when he finally (finally) tells rook he loves them. he never calls rook my love until after the fade prison in the mortal path, and it's just the once, as far as i can actually remember. and it's because of all of that shit above.
(lich emmrich does it earlier, because that this may be my last chance to say it comes a hell of a lot sooner, and he uses my love liberally after that point.)
this is intentional on his part. this man has skirted around using the word love so much ("very fond of you" my ass) that rook totally has the option to call him out on it and it's like a record scratch.
he's, i think, terrified of loving something that can die? and he's terrified of being alone. and ultimately a romanced mortal emmrich has to face both of those things, one after the other, between manfred and the fade prison. and i think, going forward, it's not going to be completely gone - in fact for a hot minute after everything it's probably exacerbated to a large degree and he's probably extra...like that for a while - but it makes him confront those things head on in...very blunt ways. here's a reminder of what losing someone you love deeply to death feels like. here's what losing someone you've given your heart to for safekeeping feels like. it's kind of disingenuous to claim his fears are left untouched, when he's given a one-two knock out punch and is left having to deal with the fallout of that.
eta: and none of this actually touches on the fact that it's him that tells rook to grab the dagger before they go poof, so he's siting with that constant weight on his chest, too, but we'll dig into that at a later time because it's cold and my fingers are starting to get stiff.
#( headcanons )#// i've said before i think emmrich's been burned bad in the past#// and i do#// i think he's been very hurt by someone he thought was going to be it#// and i don't think he ever stops fearing that's going to happen again#// well#// until a point#// that point apparently being yanking rook's ass out of the fade prison idk what to tell you#// and that is why i think he doesn't talk about his romantic past?#// and why i think he actually is so guarded with rook until the point he realizes#// hey you know what losing you would actually be pretty fucking awful#// and he's forced in no uncertain terms to face what that would feel like#// which doesn't even cover losing manfred who is#// a whole 'nother ball of wax to get on with#// anyway my point here is#// mortal emmrich is already ready to do a lot of shit to get the two most important people in his life back#// some of which may be called ill-advised#// imagine how much worse it could be#// hi i'm thinking about all the ways a lich emmrich could go bad don't mind me#// but also how emmrich is so guarded even in the honeymoon phase of a relationship#// that it almost goes up in flames around him#// and how the whole point is HE HAD TO FACE HIS FEAR#// join us next time when we discuss how bratty rook interrupts his actual job is actually my villain origin story
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he still has his tonsils. by the way if you even care
#sorry this is fucking UNINTELLIGIBLE but unfortunately i’m still on my bullshit about dr. daddyissues. yeah it’s gonna be all month#i am rotating episode 2.8 ‘the mistake’ in my head at breakneck speed. i am gnawing on it i want to swallow it#oh he’s such a lying liar who lies. charming little bastard. would rather die/lose his license than express one wholly unaffected emotion#‘he thinks not giving a crap makes him like house. like it’s something to aspire to’ quick question HOW serious do the daddy issues have to#be before you start latching on to fucking GREGORY HOUSE as a paternal figure and role model. really#even cameron is not down this bad. even WILSON is not down this bad.#the daddy issues of it all are very understandable though because even setting aside whatever went down back in childhood that shit his#father did to him in seasons 1-2 is SO messed up. jesus#imagine traveling all the way across the world to the hospital your son works in for a consult which confirms what you already knew: you’re#going to die of cancer in like 2 months. making a whole point out of stopping by to visit your son. not telling him what’s going on.#letting him spend a whole episode’s worth of time gradually coming to terms with his complicated feelings towards you (complicated on#account of a whole childhood of objectively awful parenting). the kid finally is able to try reaching back out to you. after YOU initiated#the contact in the first place. how do you react? well obviously by telling him ‘oh sorry i actually have to get in a taxi right now’ and#fucking back off to the other side of the world without giving him a chance to actually talk to you at all and resolve any of the emotions#you just dredged up. oh by the way you still haven’t fucking told him you’re about to die and in fact actively mislead him into thinking#he’s going to have the chance to try meeting with you again next time he visits your home country.#especially fucked up given that the whole reason it DID take your son so long to come around THIS time is that he feels like every time#he’s tried reaching out to you in the past you’ve just disappointed him by refusing to put in the effort to meet him there.#And Now Here We Are Again.#rowan what the FUCK is wrong with you. i want to dig you up and kill you again#house md#robert chase#caseyposting
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Danny Phantom Shiptember 2023
It's that time of year again!
Shiptember will be taking place from September 24th - September 30th.
Topics/prompts listed above. You can choose one prompt or all 3 prompts for the day listed. Your submission can be writing/art/whatever you'd like!
Saturday September 30th is also a FREE DAY - you can choose from the topics listed for the day, do any of the previous prompts, or make up your own! Go wild!
You can choose any ship you want!
For any poly ships, you can use these dynamics: Grumpy x Sunshine x Chaos, Flirty x Flustered x Indifferent, Protective x Reckless x Mom Friend, Idiot in Denial x Idiot in Denial x Waiting for Idiots to Realize, Oblivious x Obvious Flirt x Pining, Dumbass x The Only Brain Cell x Encouraging the Dumbass, Cocky Bastard Bad x Cinnamon Roll Good x True Chaotic Neutral.
Please keep things appropriate i.e. no minor/adult ships or incest, please tag any NSFW content, use trigger warnings for triggering topics, etc. Be respectful of other people!
Here is a list of phandom ship names if you need ideas or a guide through the wild and nonsensical ship names we have.
Here is the AO3 collection!
Please use the tag #DP Shiptember 2023 for organizational purposes!
[IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Calendar listing prompts for each day of the week for Danny Phantom Shiptember 2023 as follows:
9/24: Grumpy x Sunshine; Catching Feelings...Again; "Quick, kiss me!" 9/25: Flirty x Flustered; Accidental; "You're staring again." 9/26: Protective x Reckless; Cliche; "Wait...Is this a date?" 9/27: Idiot in Denial x Idiot in Denial; Intimate; "Are you flirting with me right now?" 9/28: Oblivious x Obvious/Pining; Fight; "Just play along." 9/29: Dumbass x The Only Brain Cell; Oh shit I'm in love with them; "Because I love you, okay?" 9/30: Cocky Bastard Bad x Cinnamon Roll Good; Sharing; "It's always been you."; ALSO FREE DAY]
#danny phantom#phandom#shiptember#DP Shiptember 2023#phandom event#aw shit here we go again#I know this is not a popular event but I like it so fuck you#DP Shiptember#Danny Phantom Shiptember
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In light of twitter being run by the human equivilent of a kidney stone, I am slowly pulling away from twitter and am now on Bsky. Depending on the ai situation I may also be deleting my old art from there.
#SIGH#aw shit here we go again#I actually did like twitter a lot#i met some really cool people on there who became some really cool friends#it feels a lot easier to talk to people on there bc on here replies get lost in the notifications a lot :')#I'll probably be moving back here as a main base ig#it's so exhausting to have to constantly find new places to restart from and rebuild when you've put a lot of effort into what you do#I don't have the biggest following i know but still#UGHHH
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This is my formal plea to literally everyone that you STOP going out and buying tickets to Disney remakes and sequels. As someone who holds that studio very close to my heart for the magic they used to create, it genuinely blows my mind how they're still finding immense financial success with shitty reincarnations of their preexisting IP. Do people not understand? Hate alone will do nothing! The top people at Disney are suffocating their artists with corporate greed! The executives and the shareholders do not give a SHIT if people on letterboxd hate their movie. If it's making money in the box office, they will continue making garbage because it WORKS! Please get a fucking grip and support other animation studios or literally any new IP that Disney actually decides to take a chance on, because money speaks, and it's the only language these current money hungry cowards at Disney seem to understand! I know for a damn FACT Walt has been turning in his grave for the past ten to fifteen years and it makes the prior Disney obsessed child in me SICK!!!
#disney#moana 2#snow white remake#literally fuck this shit I hate this greedy ass company so damn much#firing their fucking 2d animation team bc they're unionized#hiring diverse cast just for the tokenization and then leaving them to deal with the backlash#leaving artistic decisions until the last fucking moment and changing things at the flip of a coin when shit gets rocky#i would actually rather pull out my own nail than watch the new snow white movie#I know it makes me sound insane#but there is something so innately evil about taking the most classic film in your company's history and bastardizing it#everything about it looks shit#the casting for the evil queen is awful the cgi looks shit the costuming is an eyesore the girlboss storyline is going to being grating#like genuinely I love the original snow white so deeply just as a work of art it is such a beautiful and important movie in cinema#and it's the last one I thought they would dare mess with and here we are#like just actually fuck them. luigi if you need another name...bob iger might be an option...#that is a joke please don't put me on a watchlist fbi#but seriously like go watch something else literally anything else#starve them of their precious profits until they make some good shit again#until they let creativity flourish like Walt once did#go watch the wild robot or something of that nature if u need a good animated film#disney is not the animation powerhouse anymore i fear
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Through the magic of an AU, Xander, Min, and Teruko make it through the night, avoid a Class Trial, and participate in the first motive alongside everyone else. Except, this time, the first motive is... a gift exhange?
(basically, if it wasn't clear, i'm drawing the drdt characters doing a secret santa exchange with each other, hopefully posting one interaction per day until christmas!)
#drdt secret santa saga#<- block this tag if you don't want to see any of the posts. since there will be seventeen of them#danganronpa despair time#drdt#monotv#teruko tawaki#xander matthews#drdt spoilers#<- for the caption. i think i'm largely gonna avoid spoilers this time yippee!#aw shit here we go again etc etc#i'm hoping this one will take less time than drdttober but also i wanted to have more of them done before today#and i didn't#so we'll see what happens!!!!1!!#hopefully posting one per day is okay for drdttober i put them all together because i didn't want to spam the tag#but i feel like something more advent calendar-ish is more suitable for christmas? i hope it's just like a nice present :)#also please do not take this as a knock on drdtcember or the fangan gift exchange#those are both very cool ideas i was just intimidated out of doing them by quantity of work and others' expectations#but i still wanted to do something fun! hence this#all of the matchups are randomized btw. i thought that would be most fun#my art#comic#fanart#fanganronpa#fun fact i was originally going to do something with sdra 2 and the 12 days of christmas#but did you know. that there are SO MANY parts of the 12 days of christmas that are just large groups of people. it was boring#i pretty much only had ideas for 12 11 5 and 1 so i aborted and did this instead#i'll figure out a way to draw sdra 2 someday. someday......
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POV: impending divorce arc
#oh hush salem#cult of the lamb#cotl spoilers#i guess technically#just to cover the bases hehe#just felt like making a silly#this was me when choosing a weapon and curse before going to “free” TOWW#like “aw shit here we go again”
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Dread be dreading
#ughg#i usually have awful thoughts randomly popping up here or there#make me pretty anxious for a few days then i won't think about them for a while#but man i can't handle doubts suddenly resurfacing#like this monday i was listening to my last lecture and everything bad i cooked up a in the past few months hit me like a truck#couldn't even focus i was too busy internally chanting shit fuck i don't want this i made a huge mistake shit shit#i won't be able to handle all this responsibility i'm so tired this will butcher my mental health should have chosen media studies fuuuck#what was i thinking what am i gonna do help#then proceeded to distract myself with an electric outlet otherwise i might have started crying#:/#and those thoughts aren't wrong unfortunately#i love this university and the classes and the things i study#the teachers and my classmates and the kids i got to take care of#but i don't think i could do this for real#i'm not even struggling with anything i'm just scared and tired as hell#and thought i could just. power through it- like if i'm stubborn enough it won't matter that it's draining#but damn#and hell originally i came here because i wanted to teach english to kids#i guess my expectations were too high i don't feel like i've learned anything that useful this far#and turns out it won't get better#we just gonna do presentations again#to be fair i loved researching nursery rhymes but i hoped we would have... more. of that#also about media studies. chief... i crave to be there#could have picked the english specialization there too- i'm a moron. a bozo. holy shit#well. gonna go through this semester either way. because again everything i study here (almost everything) is genuinely great and useful#and perhaps i'm just in a Pit right now#the dread pit#should probably break this to my sister. somehow#random squeak
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the combination of kishimoto‘s misogyny + dudebro misogyny + fujoshi misogyny turned into Extreme Maximum Intensity Misogyny and changed the whole anime landscape in regards to misogyny discourse
To me it kind of feels like badly written female characters used to be a downside to shounen (albeit a downside used as a shield by dudebros to call female characters whatever they want without receiving backlash) and now its part of its appeal.
#easily one of the most deranged fandoms ever#when i watch other mainstream shounen anime the naruto girls seem to be kinda average in the shitty writing scale#this is not to say that kishimoto didnt fuck up with the fc‘s#its just that most shounen have badly written fc‘s and the weeb community tends to shield the other founding fathers of anime misogyny lol#anyway i think the way naruto fans talk about female characters has done irreparable damage to these discussions and a lot of the stupid#talking points are used for current popular shows#i feel like an elder#aw shit here we go again#naruto#fandom critical#misogyny in fandom
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okay so i saw this post about s5 will and nellie from the haunting of hill house and went into a fugue state and wrote this, loosely LOOSELY inspired, more kind of the wisp of the vibe of the post, really. i just HAD TO
Why was he here? Why was he here?
It was five minutes till midnight.
The cold night air bit his cheeks until they turned red, dug its claws beneath the thin sweater he’d stolen from Mike’s closet before leaving the Wheeler’s, the wind tossing his hair where it peeks out from one of Dustin’s borrowed beanies. There were worn boots on his feet, an old pair of Lucas’ that Sue Sinclair had pressed upon him one day when she saw the dirty sneakers he’d been wearing when they left Lenora Hills, but it was like the chill from the asphalt was seeping in through the thick soles and thin socks to nip at his toes all the same.
It was five minutes till midnight, and Will had gotten out of bed, dressed poorly for the weather, borrowed Mike’s abandoned and forgotten bike, had navigated the empty streets, before finally coming to a halt on the road directly in front of the Creel House.
He’s never even been here, how did he even know where to go?
Four minutes till midnight.
He stares up at the house, standing dark and silent before him. Why is he here? What compelled him to leave the warmth and safety of the Wheeler house, the comfort of his bed, the company of his best friend’s snoring only a mere few feet away, for the unpleasant atmosphere of this accursed place?
Only… it wasn’t so warm, was it? They’ve been staying with the Wheelers, Will and Jonathan, while Joyce, Hopper, and El stayed at the cabin, but it’s been months. There’s only so much hospitality a person could extend, and Karen Wheeler was nearly at her limit. Ted was over it almost before it began, making muttered comments his breath about food shortages and spacing issues, and his favorite topic of conversation these days was how much the water bill would cost this month.
And it wasn’t exactly safe, either. The walls of the Wheeler’s home couldn’t keep Vecna’s voice out of Will’s head, nor could it stop the horrible dreams, the fantastical visions, the terrifying hallucinations. He still felt the phantom touch of creepy crawling legs along his skin. He still felt the chill, always in that one specific spot in the basement and nowhere else. He still saw shadows moving out of the corner of his eye, taking the shape of some shadowy form that watched him with human eyes and discorporated when his head swiveled in its direction. He still heard whispers, low enough he could almost mistake it for static if only they didn’t occasionally say his name. He still tasted the familiar fog-like air of the Upside Down if he dared to breathe through his mouth, heavy on his tongue with the taste of decay.
Three minutes till midnight.
The bed he slept in wasn’t at all comfortable. It was an air mattress Karen had managed to scrounge up, as Jonathan had volunteered himself to take the old, springy couch in the basement, leaving Will and his air mattress to set up camp in Mike’s room. This just meant that when Will jolted awake in the middle of the night to a horror-inducing vision of Mike on the ceiling, surrounded by shadow, mouth open in a silent scream that echoed loudly in Will’s head, he couldn’t even turn his head the scant few inches to the side to see for himself if the real Mike was still in bed, locked in a paralysis from which he could not escape. It was a new condition for Will, developed within the first few days after arriving back in Hawkins, a condition that Dustin dedicated an entire afternoon at the library researching and announced was “sleep paralysis”, which he said could be from exposure to traumatic events - which was only the last three years of Will’s life.
And as for his relationship with Mike… well, that was all but gone, wasn’t it? Because Mike knows now. He knows about the painting, knows Will lied, knows that Will… he hadn’t said so, but his stony silence, his avoidance, his averted gaze spoke for him. Mike didn’t need to say the words, because he and Will had always had their own language, and now that language was silence. The last time they’d actually spoken to one another, it escalated into an argument that ended with Mike saying he was going to hang out with El to get away from you, and Will bitterly replying yeah, maybe if you keep showing up where you’re not welcome she’ll take you back. And now, Mike left the house early and came home late, and he faked his snores until Will fell asleep first.
Two minutes till midnight.
It was obvious Will was struggling. Joyce tried to get him to open up, but she had other things to worry about, like getting the cabin ready for the harsh winter they were expecting, supporting El, spending time with Hopper after only just getting him back. Will couldn’t begrudge her that, especially not when the knowledge of what happened to Bob, what he’d done to Bob, still haunted them both. After all she’s done for Will, all she’s given, all she’s given up, she deserves to be happy. Even if Will’s not quite part of that happiness anymore.
Lucas and Dustin had their own struggles. Lucas was clinging onto hope that Max would wake up, spending most of his time by her side, reading aloud to her and holding onto the cast that covered her hand. Dustin was still reeling from his first real loss, a guy Will had never met and couldn’t properly mourn. He lost himself in work, volunteering at the shelter and burying himself in it, pushing himself to the brink of exhaustion every day in order to be able to sleep at night.
After their talk in the kitchen of Surfer Boy, Jonathan had made an effort to listen more, to talk more, but he could only do so much. He couldn’t carry on a conversation when the other party refused to participate, and his attempts to get Will to open up were more and more often met with monosyllabic responses and half-hearted shrugs. Eventually, he stopped trying, seemingly deciding to give Will some space. And despite the fact that he’d pushed for it, Will took this as yet another sign that he was unwelcome.
And El… El perhaps hurt the worst, perhaps even more than Mike. Because while Mike was his heart, a loss he felt keenly all day and all night, El was a part of him. They’ve been connected since that first meeting, or maybe even before then, because when she appeared to him in the Upside Down, as he lay curled up in Fort Byers, he felt like he knew her before he’d even opened his eyes. Something in him had whispered oh, there you are, i know you, a feeling that only solidified when they finally met in person a year later, after she closed the gate and he expelled a monster from his body. There you are. And now she was too busy training, too busy searching the void for Max, too busy looking for a way to save the world. She was too busy for Will.
One minute till midnight.
Unwelcome, unwanted, unappreciated, a voice whispers in his ear, so familiar an occurrence that Will didn’t even startle anymore. They’ve abandoned you, Will. Your family abandoned you. They’re out there going about their dreary days, living their dreary lives, and they spare no thought to the lonely boy they’ve forgotten. Goosebumps break out along the nape of his neck, and it almost feels like a loving caress. But you don’t need them, Will. You have never needed them. They are the ones who need you, and they will never know how much that is until you’re gone. There’s an awareness of someone standing at his back for just a moment before it leaves as abruptly as it came. I have always wanted you, Will. I have missed you. Come home, Will.
The numbers on his watch tick over from 11:59 PM to 12:00 AM on November 6th, 1986, and Will doesn’t notice. He’s staring at the front of the house, staring at the porch light, which is flickering in a series of dots, dashes, and spaces.
He leaves his bike on the street. He climbs the steps.
He opens the front door and steps inside the Creel House.
And he never leaves.
W E L C O M E H O M E W I L L
#tellthatbrookebitch#stranger things#byler#byler fic#will byers#mike wheeler#i fear this is trash but alas it is my trash#seriously i saw that post and then got out my notebook like ‘aw shit here we go again’#like i was fully in bed#it is almost two am
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Here's someone's archive of the 2019 revival that I thought I should put here.
#rebornica#fnaf rebornica#tw suicide#i know for a fact there's like#atleast two missing artworks#one is an “aw shit here we go again” meme with mike walking up to the pizzeria#the other is an absurdly thick toy chica
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You guys don't mind if I try and survive more tornadoes and hail again today/tonight, right?
#the scariest part is that the bad stuff is supposed to come at night when it's dark 😭#I just found out from the NWS that there actually was a tornado that went through my town but for some reason I doubt that-#since we didn't have damage like a tornado nor was it as bad as the derecho but it was close 🤨#anyways I get to mostly be home alone for this again and now have to stay up (which isn't an issue for me lol) to keep my cats safe#*insert the ''aw shit here we go again'' meme*#midwest#thunderstorm#weather#iowa
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my baby my baby…you’re my baby say it to me…baby my baby…tell your baby that im your baby….
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