#i was gonna say ill talk about it more once im done but i dont think i will cuz. u might not believe it considering i talk abouy anything

[luck-of-the-drawings]

OOH YEAH BABY ITS THE SURGERY EPISODE BABY!!! ME AND THE HOMIES NEED SOME NEW FACES FOR OUR NEW PLAN, AND WHO BETTER TO GET THE JOB DONE THAN THE TWO MOST EVIL PEOPLE WE'VE EVER HAD THE MISFORTUNE OF HAVING OUR LIVES VIOLATED BY? I MEAN IT WOULD BE FUNNY. IT WOULD BE FUNNY.

[autizta]

I'm so sure you being a whiny mealy mouthed do nothing but be a bitch on tumblr is REALLy helping anything or anyone too.

whats mealy, like full of meals, do i get meals, i want meals

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

.

[flovverworks]

the alchstar event is gonna make me explode (positive)

[pumpkinsy0]

tldr: @buddyaldridge is a 30 year old weirdo proshipper who talks shit about ppl behind their backs, block em and report if you can/want to

just wanna let everyone know theres a omegaverse mpreg dallyboy writer whos been an all around WEIRDOOOOO cause their brain is LITERALLY porn rotted and they cannot fathom ppl actually having fun at all, their @ is @buddyaldridge aka @pelopsides previously known as @madelynprior

in 2020-2022 the outsiders tumblr they used to be @madelynprior and theyre a hardcore dallyboy stan which is already fucking weird, but on top of that, they would make teen pregnancy omegaverse smut fics which??? and im not gonna give you the ss, nigga im givin yall the LINKKK to see it with your own eyes so you know im not crazy

how ik its them is bc on their acc RIGHT before they switched to their buddyaldridge acc, and before that acc was named “pelopides”, they used to go by “madeleinepryor”, how ik its the same person is bc on a good chunk of their post, theyd tag it as “#madeleinepryor dispatches” on top of that, they just straight up linked their ao3 acc😭😭

heres what the link goes to, they linked their ao3 acc, they just changed their username on ao3 as well from madeleinepryor to greasers

now me calling them a proshipper isnt me talking out of my ass, they say it themselves like ughhhhjjj

as for them talking about other ppl, i wont share ALL the screenshots bc idk if the ppl theyre talking bad about would rlly feel comfortable w those being posted, if they know, they can feel free to post it on their own accord, so like i said, wont share, but i HAVE seen some and i can conform that they have done it, its ABSOLUTELY NOT above them

for now ill post the ss i CAN post rn which just proves my point

now ignoring that theyre talking smack, theyre just so odd and obviously didnt rlly think this through bc 1967 is ALREADY IMPLIED in the 60s, youre just incapable of reading things that arent about teen boys getting it on w each other PLEASE get a grip on reality😭😭

theyve talked about 14 year olds and their post on their acc just to shit on them, once again, GROWN ASS PERSON TWEAKIN OVER THE IDEAS OF A 14 YEAR OLD🗣️🗣️

NOW maybe your asking “how do you know the discord user and the tumblr user are the same person” AND I WILL ADMIT, while i DO have strong feelings they are the same person, its not 100% proven, HOWEVER buddyaldridge DOES go by buddy and that discord users name is buddy, so while its not concrete, the link IS there, once again, feel free to come to whatever conclusion you wanna come to about that

but what ISNT disputable is the fact that theyre a proshitter

additionally just this??? reblog from them????

on its own, not MUCH, bit considering the fics they make this is SO weird like??????

and finally, ive heard that theyve specifically came for me about my haitian shepards and maybe even my heritage, saying that they hated race hcs??????like using me as an example, they ss my acc and talked shit, someone contacted me about it and they dont have ss of it specifically, but they can vouch for it, and im not just gonna dismiss that, bc while they dont have ss, they do have ss and proof of everything else, so i do believe them, and theyve said if they find it they would show them to me, do what you wanna with this info

ANYWAYS buddy, your brain is unironically pornrotted, ur being a lil baby who cant do anything but cry and moan online on discord of all places and ur doing all this as a 30+ year old, and its CRAZIER bc youre doing all this while having “minors dni” in your pinned post, while also writing about minors, in a fandom MOSTLY OF MIDDLE SCHOOLERS!!!! (aka minors!!! ik age is hard for you to grasp) on top of that, literally ANY and ALL race hcs is way more believable and enjoyable than any “ideas” you’ve been cooking up in that odd demented, shriveled up pea brain of urs

anyways yea, that all i have to say, and im speaking for myself here, but i mean this with every fiber of my being, i dont know how you function in life but i DO NOT want you to go any farther, and i think others would/DO feel the same, ive seen what makes you cheer and i am PROUUUDDD to make you BOOOOO, you shouldnt be near minors at all, fictional or non fictional, you should BARELY be near other adults

plus if you go onto their acc rn, notice how when anon called them out, buddy aint even say they were wrong?? JUST SAYIN🗣️🗣️

im tagging everything i can tag bc i DO NOTTTT want mfs interacting w their blog, and want as many ppl as possible to be aware, dont say anything to them, dont give them attention bc obviously they’ll think this is funny and post it on their shitty discord server or whatever and giggle like they arent a grown ass nigga w bills to pay, trying so hard to cling onto their high school days, making fics about a canon middle schooler getting banged and pregnant, pls block and report do whatever u wanna do, just plssss dont let this proshitter on this damn sight near kidssss😭😭

dont take this as me WANTING drama, i dont, i just dont want ppl coming in this fandom thinking posting this shit and doing this is ok, youre bullying ppl for doing harmless things meanwhile your just making straight porn about a weird ship left n right, thinking YOUUUUU of all ppl have the place to talk about anyone or anything like your opinion on anything is valid😭😭

you NEED stones thrown at you

if anyone has anymore ss send em to mmeeeeee, but in the mean time ill be doin my own thing wooooo‼️‼️🔥🔥

[sugar-omi]

Alright all your Cove and Baxter anguish has me FUCKED UP and I need some adorable Cove fluff to recover. How about a little about Cove and M/C as newlyweds coming home after the honeymoon?

at first i didnt know what to write but then i start thinking n.... pls i love this sm i hope it heals your broken heart <3333

tags : Fluff, cove loves you sm, sharing money (cove shares his money/bank acc w you), he's just in love w you theres nothing else to say

synopsis : how cove acts after your come back from your honeymoon

he's bringing you flowers everyday

at first he brings you a couple bouquets but you've run out of places for them so he just brings you one and add them to your collection.

none of them are the same either

so you have sunflowers, lilies, roses, tulips, peonies, orchids, and many many flowers all in one vase

is it a little ugly? probably. definitely. the colors and sizes n shapes all clash but it's the thought that counts

if you don't like flowers, are allergic, or you get tired of him bring so many...

he brings you food <3

I think one of cove's love languages is food

he brings home sweets like cheese cake or marbled cake

or fudge, or chocolates

or if you aren't into sweets like that, then he'll bring lunch/dinner instead

he's a decent cook, and even if you're bad at cooking he wants you to help him

lots of kissing n half burnt food (he takes whatever portion is burnt so you don't have to eat it)

and he tries to always bring u lunch

if he can't bring you lunch for whatever reason, he either packs one for you or sends you money for lunch

COVE: hi bby, have you eaten yet YOU: im ordering food rn COVE: i sent u 50 is that enough YOU: ?!*!&!(!? YOU: that's too much 😭😭 cove pls YOU: ill send the rest back COVE: keep ot COVE: it* COVE: my money is your money

he does this all the time now, in fact he'll even had you his card

which he's always done before your marriage, but now ge even gets you a card connected to his bank account too

he doesn't even care if you share your money w him too, he just wants to give you everything he has

like if you asked for his shirt in the middle of the store I think he'd ask why n then just give it to you

as if he was gonna say no in the first place 🙄💀💀

he just becomes so much more obsessed w you after you're married

always cuddling or touching u

if you're around your mom's they're always cracking jokes....

especially if you want kids they're all "we're gonna be grandparents soon at this rate lol" (even if u want to adopt or dont wanna birth/can't have kids bc you're amab or infertile or smth)

they just think they're so hilarious 🙄🙄🙄

does he blush bright enough there's steam coming off him? maybe

does he stop? nope!!!

loves you so much, he just needs to be close to you

HAS A PICTURE OF U IN HIS WALLET

omg....

prbly has 2 actually

one is of the two of you bc sometimes he can't believe you're married n he just needs to make sure life is real

n one is of just you in your wedding attire

will talk abt you to anyone who asks or makes a comment

this mf would prbly get a shirt that says "y/n's husband" on the front

even tho it's in small print on the front it's embarrassing.... like pls we get it you're in LOVE

he'd get you both jewelry w your wedding date on it

will hold you up at the door if you try to leave without kissing him

you've always gave him a peck before leaving but now it's WORSE

once he even stopped you in the driveway before you pulled off...

man's ran out of the fucking house in socks and unicorn print sweatpants

you roll down the window "what? what's wrong?!" cove, leaning thru the window and pouting. "kiss."

you look at him in shock n disbelief before you just laugh and kiss him

he taxes you two extra kisses for the trouble, he got his socks wet from running out here!!!

you have to push him off otherwise you're gonna be late to work bc you were too busy making out in your driveway

your single/divorced neighbors hate you

the teens idolize what yall have n their standards got so fucking high after yall moved in

n the old ppl laugh bc they've been there when they married and/or they find it amazing how obsessed cove is w you

if it wasn't such a bad omen or if you didn't disapprove, he'd get your wedding date or your initials tatted on his ankle.

maybe it seems extreme all of this bc I think cove just realizes how amazing you are sometimes n all his love overflows in this way <3333

no matter how old you get he's always gonna run out in the rain, snow, or sunshine n get a kiss if you forget

pfx by the time he's 80 he can't move as fast but he's hustling down the path before you can escape

if you do get away before he can get a kiss though, he is pouting when you come back

[louscartridge]

dating bose o'brien thoughts or wtvr

bose obrien x gn reader

i do not give permission for my fics to be posted claiming to be yours, translated, or posted on another platform.

cw- reader knows bose is brainstorm, cuddling, mentions of horror movies, established relationship, reader calls bose 'baby' and /silly' once, angst/hurt +comfort if you squint, reader and bose say "i love you" to eachother.

danger force masterlist here

❥ bose is Literally the most golden retriever boyfriend to ever exist. anyways following you around and wanting to be with you. he'd (attempt to) do almost anything for you. when you're not around he gets all mopey and cant stop talking about you.

"no wonder he cant remember anything. all he ever thinks about is y/n"

❥His love language(s) are physical touch, and gift giving. Hes always clinging onto you when hes scared, or sad, or just around you honestly. You remember that one episode of danger force where shwoz's mom was "sick" and bose got her golf clubs? (Im gonna pretend he used his own money for that 💀) He uses the little money he gets from occasionally working at nacho ball, on you.

you put what bose had bought you back in the box, and onto the table that was in the middle of the couch the two of you were sitting on.

"Bose, baby. As much as i love this, and you, you really dont have to spend any of your money on me at all. Get something YOU want for yourself." you tell him.

"All i want to myself is you" he replies, his voice cracking slightly at the end making you smile while you blush at his statement.

"Ok, Ill tell you what. How about you get that new dvd you were talking about a few days ago, and we can watch it together. Then, we'll both have what we want"

❥ Obviously you guys watch shows and movies together all the time. I feel like he really likes watching cartoons with you alot too. You make him happy, cartoons make him happy, therefore- extra happy bose. You love horror movies, but as we know, bose is a bit of a scaredy cat when it comes to horror movies. However, that doesnt mean that he wont watch them with you. He knows how much you like them, and he also knows how much it means to the both of you to watch stuff together.

Youre on of the few people he'll actually watch a horror movie with. Though he still gets scared, he always feels the most safe and secure while watching a horror movie when youre there. Boes is practically hooked on your back like a koala, and his arms loosely wrapped around your neck. As hes watching the movie with you, he would occasionally yelp, and bury his face in the crock of your neck and his arms, tightening the hold his arms have around your neck slightly, all while saying "im not scared i dont know what you're talking about"

❥ This man absolutely loves cuddling. Spooning, sitting in the others lap, it didnt matter. As long as you were touching eachother, he was happy.

Hes most definitely is usually a little spoon. He feels insanely safe and protected by you. As much as he always says to the rest of his co-workers and friends that he "can protect himself" you know that sometimes he needs a little help, and he gets more scared then hed like to admit. With you tho, he had absolutely no doubt that he'll be alright.

❥ i feel like bose doesnt really care too much about sounding cheesy when hes talking to you or about you. At first he might've been a little scared to tell you how he feels about you, but after that, god he just keeps going on. He loves you and he'll sure as hell tell you that he does. He doesnt say "i love you" excessively, but he definitely says it at least twice everyday. At least once in the morning, and at least once before he or you go to sleep.

He actually said it first. One of his favorite shirts got ripped and he asked you to fix it. When you were done sewing it and gave it back to him, he exitedly grabbed it out of your hands while enthusiasticly saying "oh my god thank you, i love you" before running away.

a bit later bose came back to the couch in the mans nest where you were sitting, only this time he was wearing the shirt that you had just fixed for him a little bit ago. He sat down next to you but he seemed kinda anxious.

"Whats wrong bose?" You asked him, leaning forward slightly so you could see his face better. He was biting at his lower lip a little and looking down at his hands that were bouncing up and down from his leg bouncing. "I-im sorry if i weirded you out or anything earlier" he said not looking up from his hands. "No you didnt. Why would you? You didnt do anything" you took your left hand and softly brought it up to his jaw , turning his face so you could see eachother properly. Bose hesitated for a second before answering. "When I said i love you" it seemed as if he was holding himself back from looking at you, instead he was looking aimlessly behind you, or back down again. Only time time, instead of seeing his hands, he sees his knees slightly touching yours. You slowly rubbed your boyfriends cheekbone with your thumb. "Oh my god bose, thats what you're worried about?" You chuckle slightly. "I love you too. I said it back, you just ran away too fast for you to hear it silly" Once you said that, boses eyes immediately shot to yours. "Really?" Even tho he said it quietly, you could still hear the happiness in his voice.

"Really." You confirmed, bringing him into a soft kiss.

[melkyt]

Law has enough eccentric genious vibes to be House or any soap opera level doc lol

This amazing doctor with zero people skills, even more, this doctor that hates interacting with ppl while being the best in the country if not for all the complaints and lawsuits on his record just on the basis of being an asshole or ghosting patients even if he cures them

Luffy, some famous daredevil adventurer type with more money than he would know what to do with probably part of the mob somehow, has an older brother who needs a heart transplant. With all the other issues that Ace has, its unlikely he'll get one, even if they are on multiple transplant list, and nobody actually knows whats wrong with his heart.

(I use Ace for this trope in every fic Im not sorry. That boi can be a damsel in so many ways cx)

Luffy being Luffy decides to wander around hospitals until he A: convinces someone to give up a heart or B: Find out whats wrong with Ace, with no success on either front.

Then while wandering around he hears someone go "Yeah Trafalgar Law, best fucking doctor I have ever had the displeasure of meeting, dudes a fcking headcase but he gets the job done."

Luffy doesnt listen to most of it. He heard a name and best. Tracks Traffy down immediately! No hesitation.

With the full intent to throw money at the hospital to make them put Law on his brothers case.

But he doesn't have to, Law is ahead of him, as he keeps an eye on cases that enter his hospital and not like Luffy has been subtle in looking for Law lol, and he drops a letter in the room "Ill treat your brother, if you stop looking and leave me the fuck alone"

Luffy dumps money at the hospital anyway, and he doesn't leave Law alone, but not on purpose. The dean of the hospital keeps doing everything so they dont meet as they know as soon as they do, and Law opens his mouth, thats it for the money flow.

Luffy isnt about to go with anything anyone tries to make him do, so he finds himself trying to avoid doctors and nurses.

Law does the same, and thats how they meet. In an empty unused exam room that's more of a storage space than anything.

Luffy has no idea who Law is, he didnt bother seeing how he looked after getting the letter. He stopped looking cause it is Ace's life on the line.

Law, meanwhile, knows exactly who Luffy is, though doesn't say anything. They bond over hiding out, and soon, it becomes routine to hang out.

Eventually, Ace gets a new heart and is cured of whatever. He is discharged.

Law almost regrets that he won't spend time with Luffy anymore. He's grown to like their talks.

Luffy doesn't think about it yet. Happy his brother is healthy. When they are about to leave the hospital. Ace points and says 'yo thats the doc, i know you asked who the fuck he was' Ace only saw the man once, and Law ofc pissed him off by flippant remarks. "He's an ass"

Luffy follows his gaze and grins. "Woah, woah, that's the doc I was hanging with! He's the best" He bounces on his heels "Hey! TRAFFY!" Thats ofc what he has been calling the doc even if they never met. He runs over to Law. "My number! We should hang out all official like, I'll text you!" Then he runs out without waiting for an answer, going after Ace.

Law is a little stunned and more than a bit embarrassed that he yelled that in front of everyone. Rumors spiral for days. Law waits for his phone to buzz from Luffy but decides that it's not gonna happen and tries to go back to his life. Which is the exact point that Luffy texts him. 'Picking you up at 9!' And that's it.

They go on a date, if it can be called that. They go urban exploring because Law mentioned he was an enthusiast but didnt have the time or motivation. Luffy drags him to all his favorite places. Its the best date he has ever been on.

They go like that for awhile, at the most random times and days, Law always drops what he is doing, its a highlight in what he considers an otherwise annoying day to day.

Luffy is just happy he can make Traffy happy for saving his brother.

Law is the one who asks if Luffy wants to make it official, be boyfriends. For the first time in his life he finds himself almost stuttering over his words.

Luffy grins and nods enthusiastcly, then they kiss and everything is cool.

Law now marginally happier then he was, gets less complaints and gets along with patients a little better even if they still annoy him, he knows that if he didnt interact that one time, he would have never met Luffy.

Requests Open till 08/09/2024

[astroninaaa]

when it comes to cellbit suing twitter and everything, having an existing defamation case he already won would be good to refer to if hes gonna sue sasa specifically for defamation in terms of evidencing, right? ill be honest i dont know a whole lot about legal strategy but i imagine taking her to court for both abuse and defamation is the goal and having a case in which its already been proven that the harassment has damaged his career could be really important because after that his team just has to draw a clear connection between the harassment and sasa. idk though im not a lawyer much less a brazilian lawyer lol, do you mind weighing in? what do you think the strategy is here?

this is SUCH a good question so like. yes but also no it depends on how they argue it and on the judge imo

if he wins the lawsuit against the twitter people and proves that the harassment was awful and everything that is suuuch a strong argument to use in a lawsuit against his ex. like see they’ve recognized that this harassment affected my life a lot and really negatively and you started it

however. she could argue that she never asked people to harass him, or that she only said his name a couple of times within all the accusations, and that’s,,,, true. like, she implied VERY HEAVILY that it was him and i think (hope) that that’s enough, buttt it can also depend on how good HER lawyer is.

there IS a very clear connection between her actions and the harassment, but there’s the matter of intent. she can say she was just venting online, that she never asked people to harass him, that she tried to keep from talking about it but people kept bringing it up etc etc.

i think he still has a very strong case of she implied VERY hard that it was him and even straight up said it was him (the SA accusation quoted a tweet that said his name directly), and how more than once she talked about how awful it was that people still supported him and how they should take her side (i was a cellbit follower back in 2017/2018 it was THE TRENCHES i remember it all). at the end of the day, any judge that actually looks at the entire situation would be able to tell that, well, her side of the story is kinda iffy. no proof, just words, bringing it up whenever he’s getting more traction than usual, coming up with new, worse accusations every time but never taking him to court. saying she doesn’t want to be related to it or to him anymore and yet bringing it up at every opportunity after seven years.

so yes i think winning the lawsuit against twitter/the twitter accounts is a VERY good precedent for when he sues sasa. there are good arguments she can make for herself, but i think, at the end of the day, that if he really shows up with all the proof of what she’s done and the damage it caused, the chances of her winning are less than likely.

unless, of course, she has a bunch of proof we don’t know about. but she’s “exposed” him thousands of times without ever showing any of it, so, personally, i sorta doubt it.

i hope this answered your question anon 🫶 GREAT question btw loved it that’s a very smart thing to point out

[kitty-meowskers]

scar playlist drop wooooo (will probably add more songs)

lets go through some of the songs!!!! because i am. gay and not okay.

1) Blood // Water - grandson

ok listen. i havent listen to this song in AGESSSS but i came across it again and oh. my god.

DO I EVEN NEED TO EXPLAIN??? first of all: lamb reference. not gonna lie if the vibes were good that couldve been enough for me to throw it in butttt thats not all. THE PRICE OF YOUR GREED IS YOUR SON AND YOUR DAUGHTER???? get me out of here.

scars whole thing is about how the system 'the shepard' would never free the lambs. it wouldnt bring them any peace or freedom, it wouldnt make their lives easier. the 'look me in my eyes, tell me everthings not fine' implies that he (or the black lamb in his story) knows even if the rest dont want to admit it.

lmao this is just that hes done with the shepard. hes done with the white lambs accepting it and playing along with the game. he joins the fractsidus!!!! yipeee!!!!

2) Hayloft II - Mother Mother

OHHH boy. okay, i know the og song is about two lovers doing the silly and the father of the girl killing the guy and then the girl goes after her dad but look.

lets say the lovers are the black lamb and the white lambs. yes im using his story again because theres no way in hell that story wasnt somehow related to him.

the white lambs got 'shot' aka dragged into the shepards game, slaughtered one by one. all while the black lamb (scar) got the blame. ill bet the people tried to kill him but he made it out alive and then he obviously eventually joined the fractsidus.

hayloft is the white lambs here (yes again. just bear with me). once the shepard ran out of lambs he left, on his way to find a new group excepttttt

scars had enough.

the shepard took away his family from him, his people/lambs. therefore 'eye for an eye, a leg for a leg' but it wasnt enough killing the shepard. he couldnt let something like that again (so much rage in him) so now he has this whole extreme and crazy ideology of how the world could be better, how he could make it better.

3) A Lesson In Dramatics - Jhariah

this is just scar and rover fighting in my head. may the battle scene commence.

4) Wolf in Sheep's Clothing - Set It Off

do i really need to explain this??? okay ive been sucking at words so far but here we go

man this whole thing is JUST about him and the shepherd story isnt it? im just gonna be repeating myself again lets continue-

AHHH ok lets also talk about the way this is said in the song. personally, i think this man has A LOT of 'suppressed' rage. suppressed like that is because it doesnt out as rage necessarily i dont know if i make sense but yeah. he's crazy, but angry isnt something you'll spot at the surface because he hides it away. while the lyrics convey his rage the way he sings it does not necessarily

i have so many thoughts on the other songs too but like. I CANNOT WORD THEM. THE VOICES JUST SCREAM NONSENSE IN MY HEAD AND IM LIKE. YOURE RIGHT. even though i cant explain it..... this was not proof read btw LMAO- i just rambled kind of

[hetheyshe-remade]

yknow i shouldve figured i had ocd earlier bc one of my earliest memories is being 9 years old and go to a child psych and telling them that i was scared of going to school because people are mean and try to hurt me and also i was scared my mom would get hurt and die while i was out so i had to stay home to make sure she was okay and to stay safe and the psych was like hm okay that sounds like anxiety we'll give you some meds and then my mom was like yeah you don't need those so nothing was done about that until i went into foster care and became increasingly depressed and the thoughts just got worse and once after eating i lost the receipt and i had a full blown panic attack about it and my foster sister was like so what? and i was like so upset bc i was sure my foster parents were gonna punish me for losing it and when i got home my foster sister was like yeah we lost the receipt heres the change and i was like heart pounding in my chest (i am going to be punished i am going to be punished i am going to be puni) and my foster mom was like ugh fine okay and i immediately was like oh no im gonna get punished later instead when i dont expect it and the more i talk about this it sounds like a trauma response too but like the punishment can come from anywhere and i gotta Watch Out like sometimes i think something mean about someone when im annoyed and i immediately oh my god that was so mean and horrible. now you have to say something nice about them to make up for it (yknow- the thought in my head) and then ill feel horrible about it until the nice things i said in my head are more than the mean thing i thought on impulse.

anyways. feeling normal today.

[ghostsandfools]

this is a vent post, y’all dont gotta respond or anything, im just writing it out here cause i already vented to my partner once today and writing in a diary is too time consuming for me right now

I dont like eating anymore. Things always go the exact same way. I only like a couple of foods, and then we run out of those foods and my parents wont buy me more so i judt dont eat until i get them again, and then when i do get them again i get so scared that someone else will eat them before me, and i end up trying to eat as much as possible. And im kinda tiny, so technically i dont even eat that much but it feels like so much. One meal can take me an hour cause i keep taking breaks. And then after, i feel tired and full and yucky and awful, and i get scared cause i have emetophobia and i keep worrying about getting sick. And i know i shouldnt eat that much but i do anyways. I havent gotten sick from it yet but the thought of it happening makes me wanna cry. I know it’s not healthy, and i hate that i have to struggle with this because i usually know how to deal with this stuff. Life has thrown a lot at me, and ive learned how to manage my mental issues so i dont end up hurting myself. Im usually the one that other people vent to, ive even been helping my partner with their eating issues, so i hate that i cant stop myself from this. I dont like it at all. Im hoping that its gonna go away over time just like everything else has. I used to self harm and i really struggled with that for a while too, but over time and with a little help from a friend i was able to stop that. Maybe this will be the same way… theres not really anything i can do about it. My doctor noticed i was underweight and suggested maybe i should get eating therapy so i can stop being so picky, but that was months ago. I dont know if its gonna happen. And i cant talk to my parents about it cause theyll say some dumb shit about how praying is going to help or how i just need to get better at eating and its not that hard. Cause thats exactly what theyve done every other time. And im stsrting to realize im gonna have to learn how to be there for myself the same way im there for others.

if you did read all this, dont worry bout me. I know that was a pretty depressing little paragraph, but writing it out has made me feel a little better. It’s easy to give people advice, but i have trouble following my own advice sometimes, and thats something im practicing. Im glad that i realize the issue, because at lesst i can work on it. Thats the first step. I think ill be alright.

[fictionfixations]

LMAO ZEN (doesnt it happen for everyones routes though? i havent done like another story yet tho)

anyway before i get into talking about jumin (as the route im on rn) i wanted to wonder

yknow how certain things happen but only on someones route?

like zen has the echo girl thing, idk what yoosung has i forgor but i think jaehee had that one project??? that got her interested in like coffee stuff? jumin has the arranged marriage?? and seven has like. well. the hacker stuff.

but it never gets mentioned on someone elses route ? i dont think? i feel like itd be more cooler if it was all happening at once as like little references (but either something they can handle or cant handle outside of the route. just like maybe a vague mention of trouble to interest the player in that route, while still making sense from like a timeline standpoint???)

like. people doing things but its not because youre the one pushing it towards that. i like that more. and im curious how chaotic itd be

anyway

JUMIN. (disclaimer: I dont like him)

WARNING i start venting in this post. theres only one mention of a triggering thing (which is warned before the actual vent part but i dont want to put here to bring the mood down more cause in all honesty im over it. im just kind of projecting.)

i think ive said before how i can understand the liking of possessive partners

but. okay maybe its just that i dont like jumin as much as the others but. this is kinda way too much. or maybe its that i value my own independence a whole lot or maybe its because i really dont like the thing with his cat (and i LIKE cats. so giving me a character who likes cats and making me not like them??? ahgeiudhf)

like 'dont leave or ill go insane and make your face known everywhere so i can find you again' like the fuck no w h y CAN I LEAVE

I want to leave i dont care if i get the bad ending get me out of here 😭 (actually i think the bad ending mightve been if we encouraged being compared to like his cat and like. was willing to stay forever.)

e w NO like CHILL

maybe. im. being too extreme. and im just too on edge. but like. can you not. i am not your property?? i am not an object??

now LISTEN i understand marking. like like yknow biting and so and so as like a claim over your partner. and now that? thats hot and i like that. but thats ONLY for the bedroom there comes a point where too much of a thing is a bad thing

ALSO we've known each other how many days has it been. eight?? WE've known each other EIGHT days dont be horny bonk

g o o d . this is good.

STOP. dont talk like you know whats best for a person. like its some thing that'll happen, not a what if.

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. now if he was being more weird id say go home but hes. OKAY. ish. now. like hes trying. and anyway getting him to not do it takes time. and also this is a game of romance fantasies where creepy shit gets played off as kinky or something. (not a jab towards mysme its just the kind of thing its trying to do which can result in uncomfortable parts if you take off your rose-tinted glasses of wOAH ROmANCE. its expected since ppl think certain things are hot when in reality its kind of very not that great)

…CAN I GO HOME???? like BRUH im not gonna accept you just cause you do so and so

why does this feel like a 'nice guy'. maybe this is my bad because this is making me really want to leave buth gdiuhfuih

trigger warning. i vent. mention of kermit sewer slide but nothing actual.

ive been pushing the 'stay here to help jumin feel more calm' but. i do also need to prioritize my own well being and my well being is not happy here rn 😭 (on a serious note though while its important to be there for your partner, its NOT a good thing to give everything to make sure your partners okay, because y'all are equals and as you help them stand they need to help you stand too or you'll collapse under all that and it really wont be a good time. im telling you its very draining. and why i promote the idea of get your shit together before you get with someone because there comes a point where you can be too dependent on your partner which isnt good for you or for them [and they can feel hesitant to express their feelings because they dont want to hurt you, or hesitant to do anything too stressful because theyre like that support pillar for them, and they dont want to do anything that causes otherwise because they dont want their partner to get hurt. it can also mean they go along with what the other wants even if they dont really want to because they dont want to hurt them. am i projecting? ithink im projecting. cause like. ive been there. and honestly i think it kind of fucked me up cause there was like a power imbalance in that one was significantly more fragile and vulnerable then the other, which made me feel like i should be going along with it because i didnt want them to be hurt when they didnt have anyone else they could rely on but me. [i tried to get them to make more friends cause relying on a single person is very unhealthy but no dice] but that also meant that they didnt respect my boundaries or respect me when i say no and instead just gave off excuses to make me change my mind or made me feel like i had to do what they wanted or theyd deliberately hurt themself. so.. it was a lot. anyway it really fucked me up cause i felt like i was in the wrong for not going along with it. blah blah blah. we split. i genuinely have no idea if it was true or not but they'd started saying things to make me feel bad and just not a fun time at all. they were probably in a really dark time in their life but im gonna be honest. i dont know in what scenario its okay to go 'im gonna kermit sewer slide if you dont [blah blah blah]'. so yknow. and this is not really the same but it still feels the same in walking all over boundaries and lines and is especially why i do not like this character a bit. yay trauma.])

i might actually get a bad ending because i. really dont like this.

[leclerced]

I feel like, of all the other guys, Max is the saddest/in the most withdrawal from not having Bunny around when she pulls back to just Lando and Oscar

he was around first, goddamn it, and if he had known he could just *ask* to be her boyfriend, he definitely would have done that ages ago, long before Oscar even entered the conversation

part of him feels like it’s a personal rejection, not only because of the feelings Bunny knows he has for her (she knows that what he’s muttering under his breath when he cums inside her is that he loves her but she doesn’t want to broach that until he says it with his chest) but also because of everything he’s done for all of them - the parties, the lingerie, everything

one day she runs into him at the supermarket in Monte Carlo or something like that and they’re actually alone together for the first time in a month or three and he asks if he can just hold her for a minute and that’s how Bunny manages to stay warm in the ice cream aisle

-〽️

um go away. (pls dont) im gonna cry im in such a max mood ive been watching nothing but max edits on tiktok before i sleep

bunny just waiting for him to talk about his feelings but he doesn’t before they pull the plug on things and like. i think she’d ask for one more night w him to say goodbye and she’d barely make it out of his room before she breaks down crying and the boyfriends are in lando’s room for the night and she’s supposed to join them but she goes to oscar’s and cries alone bc she can’t feel things for max anymore. both of them hiding feelings bc it’s too late. she’d plan on going back to them but cries herself to sleep and they just assume she decided to spend the night w max but when they see him the next morning he looks like shit and they ask where bunny is and he’s like idk she left me. and the words have a deeper meaning than just leaving his room.

oscar searching for her and finding her curled up in his bed alone, willingly sleeping alone for the first time in months bc even her boys couldn’t make her feel better.

max avoiding them for awhile bc he doesn’t know what how to act around them anymore but then months later has a bad race like maybe gets crashed out and he immediately seeks her out and can’t find her and is more disappointed. goes to his driver’s room and she’s already there laying on his couch. she just opens her arms and he lays with her and finally he gets to enjoy being around her for the first time in months. neither of them say anything and eventually someone comes to get him for an interview and she’d look so sad watching him leave but he wouldn’t realize it’s because she misses him, he thinks its just because she feels bad for him for being crashed out.

he wouldn’t even know how to ask them to hang out bc that used to mean fuck but now he just wants to be around her bc that’s all he can do. ill SOB. bunny and him cuddling all the time after he stops avoiding them and him secretly (not) being in love with her but not saying it bc he doesn’t want to overstep. but its worse once they’re almost back to normal bc he has to see her every day and think ab the chances he didn’t take every time she’s cuddling into him.

[k20spock]

OKAY SO SIFFRIN. THEY CANNOT REMEMBER WHERE THEY LIVED AS A KID THEIR COUNTRY ANYTHING ITS ALL A TOTAL BLANK. THEY ARE NOT LIKE ANYONE ELSE THEYVE MET THEIR ACCENT IS ALL THEIR OWN THEIR CLOTHES ARE TOTALLY UNIQUE THEY FIT IN **NOWHERE**

they are stuck in a timeloop of killing the king a guy who haa currently trapped the entire country of vagaurde in frozen time. they wake up from a nap a day before them and their party fight the king and the loop ends shortly after they kill the king.

the only person who remembers these loops aside from them is a star. named. loop. who really really really doesnt want you to kill yourself. like once you get far enough in game for "hey i have a dagger maybe i can use that to start again" they ask three times if youre really really sure you want to do that. at which point their forced to tell you. and once you have killed yourself and talk with them again they ask if you wsnt to stop having that as an ootion where once you say you want to keep it you get asked again if youre sure you want to.

anything that doesnt fit timewise gets erased. so you pick up an item for the first time and then go there again in a new loop the copy gets erased from time and replaced by some healing items. and so siffrin is following the "script" as best they can acting as if they arent looping and mostly saying the same stuff as the first loop because they dont want to get erased.

they view it all as a play now and say "scene 1 act 1 siffrin wakes up from a nap. after laying there for a bit they get up" and when you meet mirabelle after waking they say "enter mirabelle" its all just nothing to them anymore.

at one point they have a breakdown in the bathroom because they lied about there being no toilet paper as their reason for taking so long and odile got them some and they just broke a bit because that was the first new thing that they didnt know in so so so so long.

they have dissociation and also troubles with semantic memory they frequently forget basic words they forget what a kiln is what a forge anvil sharpening stone is. a stuffed animal. this has happened so much in the past that if siffrin looks at something for longer than a few seconds someone in the group will let them know what its called.

its also the first time ive ever seen just. a depiction of dissociation at all really and its just.. so well done.. with the blinking and then bam the meal is done blinking and then their in bed blinking and then their at the door to the house. its just so well done.....

they also get ptsd from being in the timeloop due to a thing im not spoiling but which fucked me up so bad that i didnt sleep that night.

they also use he they and are asexual !

the first time they kill themself they say how it hurt so bad and that it felt like forever that they were bleeding out there while their family panicked and couldnt do anything to help and the third time it happens he goes oh no im not gonna say anything because im so good at this now and ends up saying more that time than he did the first time. . .

the killing himself to reset the loop really fucks him up!! he has also forgotten anything that happened before the timeloop due to how long hes been in it now.. the group mentions a funny thing that happened and he cant remember it when he could earlier in the game.

theres a boulder crush trap on the first floor and when getting crushed by it he now says "cant remember basic stage directions"

hes so fucked up and mentally ill and wants to be touched and close to people and wont admit it because its embarassing and everyone thinks he hates being touched

hes so mentally ill and fucked up and loves dying and killing himself hes my favorite ever i love him so much hes my silly guy <3<3<3<3

oh. ok i get it now.

[aristotels]

Of course all problems and inequalities are direct consequence of modernity and in the past those who are now considered undesirable were considered divine and definitely weren't treated even worse and didn't have access to anything that resembles accomodations. Let's bring those times back!

In Ancient Rome specifically there was no hospitalisation, yes, but also people who were considered mad couldn't make financial and legal operations on their own at all and couldn't be citizens, and were considered pariahs by their communities. This is not to say that you are wrong because you picked the wrong time to see as "when things were better", it's that just because what causes problems now is capitalism doesn't mean that before it people were always kind and caring, everything is much older.

(Or that removing the money would fix everything on its own, for that matter)

are you literally so stupid to fail to see my point

the point isnt "LOOK WHAT THEY TOOK FROM US" the point is that fears and delusions depend on the society youre brought up in; and also sorry that a 5 sentences tumblr post didnt go into history of medical malpractice, it was a lighthearted post made by someone with those very issues

yeah, if i lived then, then id have a different delusion more fit to those times - but it would not resemble my current paranoia or nightmares of being drugged or talked to the way ive had medical staff talk to me bc those things are specific to our society.

(Also you can still have your rights denied for being mentally ill today as well?????? what happened to free britney??? And like My family doctor once literally suggested to my dad to involountary check me into psych ward which was smth my psychiatrist at the time was very much trying to avoid because he KNEW how dehumanizing that is, he spent more than sn hour trying to figure out if my visions of suicide were actual suicide risk or intrusive thoughts; telling me later that he was willing to gamble such a huge risk and responsibility he would have to take in case i actually did smth to myself - just to keep me out of the hospital stay because he worked there and SAW how dehumanizing it is. because getting in the ward here doesnt mean youre done when youre out, this shit affects FUCKLOAD of things in your life!)

are you really trying to be like "LETS TAKE AWAY ACCOMODATIONS FROM PEOPLE WHO SUFFER WOOW GOOD JOB" in my inbox rn btw considering that i am literally schizophrenic w some other mental illnesses, and that i take fucking meds upon meds for it, including antipsychotics??????? and i am also very grateful for those aids, but even with meds my condition will never be resolved and its severity very much depends on the people/society around me. my delusions while living in croatia might differ from someone who lives in the usa.

i literally have no patience or attention or care or anything to argue with you rn, if you wanna discuss political or economical or marxist or whatever theory in my inbox go ahead, but i am NOT arguing about my own fucking lived experience and having you speak to me this way, in an incredibly entitled and dismissive way. its late and im going to bed. i genuinely dont care for your "ummmmm ekshually capitalism is noot thaaat bad-" shit while i keep having episodes on the daily in a big part due to fuckin capitalism. losing my other job is putting me through stress because i have no money, but it also eased up certain aspects of my illness because i dont have to hit hardcore fucking deadlines every week.

p.s. who the fuck is talking about money not existing. if you are gonna bring that up within communist theory and up for a serious discussion thats a whole other thing, but moneyless and stateless society doesnt just rest on tadaaah no money, like theres a reason marx wrote books n essays on that shit and why daddy engels sent him checks. and even in ideal communist world we would still have mental illnesses, but i am absolutely positive that my thoughts would differ than the current ones and that they would probably be less severe. and also why is this implying that communism wont have like the fuckin medication

i usually take care to carefully reply to asks and try to actually give a serious opinion but i gen dont care if i sound incoherent rn, this legit pissed me off