#and that kind of proximity fosters incredibly close relationships. most of the people ive dated have been from that camp because of that
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#its valentines day (yesterday but i havent gone to bed yet so its the same day) so im gonna talk about my crush#i figured out its really a crush because if it was just hyperfixation it wouldve been done by now#but its been months and i still really like her so its real#anyway. we became friends during one of the shittiest weeks of my life#in a time when everything was difficult and i felt so out of my element and inadequate and altogether bad. she was kind to me#she approached me. made conversation. several times. was the friendliest any stranger has ever been#at the end of the week i asked for her number to keeo in touch. and she gave it to me. and texted#i figured the friendship might fizzle out. but she kept texting. we kept talking. she talked about her problems and her happiest moments#shes trans and like me got put into the 'only out trans person for queer kids to look up to' slot at our summer camp jobs#she once texted me at 4am about horror movies and we ended up texting until 8am#she has a guinea pig named Agnes. she dropped out of college. she joined camp staff to avoid helping her mom move#and i love all of that about her. and i wish i could say these things but i dont want to freak her out and lose one of the best friendships#but im playing the long game because. this summer she applied to the same summer camp as me. so we'll be around each other a lot more#and that kind of proximity fosters incredibly close relationships. most of the people ive dated have been from that camp because of that#so im gonna spend the summer trying to get closer. and then maybe by the end ill shoot my shot#worst case ive just gotten closer to a very good friend. im not going into the summer with the goal of dating her#just the goal of getting to know a wonderful person better. and im just very delighted to have her in my life#and have the chance to work with her this summer. its all just good and makes me happy#its one of the only things keeping me going rn#so happy valentines day everyone
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