#i was gonna be mean and just put the first picture

[witchygagirlwrites]

Baby's First Christmas

Jay Halstead x Reader

You and Jay have a 2 month old and its her first Christmas @allisonargent144

“Jay, baby she’s two months old. She’s not even going to remember it” you couldn’t help but laugh because your boyfriend was nothing shy of adorable. He wore your daughter Lilian across his chest in a baby sling and showed her every bulb and asked where she wanted to put it before placing it on the tree. 

He cut his eyes at you with a small smirk “I know this but we will and she’ll see pictures. I want her to know that we have always gone all out for her. That’s she’s been celebrated” you shook your head but snapped a photo nonetheless. Christmas was a little over a week away and this year was different for you and Jay considering you were parents now.

The most stressful day of your life was finding out you were pregnant. You’d caught two rounds to your vest and med wanted to do an xray to ensure nothing was broken but needed to do a urine test first as a precaution like they did on every woman to ensure they weren’t pregnant. The look on Will’s face when he’d come back into your room was something you would never forget.

“Repeat that one more time Will” you couldn’t believe what he was telling you. “Um you’re about six and a half weeks pregnant Y/N” you nodded slowly, holding your side where it was sore from the blow you’d caught “What about the slugs I caught in the vest? Did that hurt it?” he shook his head “We can do an ultrasound but by now you would be bleeding if anything was wrong besides with how far up you were shot it shouldn’t have affected anything. Am I safe in assuming it’s Jay’s?”

“No shit Halstead!” you hadn’t meant for your voice to get so shrill but between the dull ache in your side and now this you couldn’t help it. He grinned “Well then congrats, want me to go get him?” You nodded “Please”

You’d heard Jay long before he got to your room “If something is wrong with her and you’re out here with me instead of helping her you’re gonna need a doctor” the door to your room burst open and he stormed in, freezing when he saw the look on your face “What’s wrong?”

You swallowed hard and looked back at Will who nodded “I’ll give you two some privacy” once Will walked out you took a deep breath “Jay um they couldn’t do an xray. Will just had to physically check my ribs” his eyes scrunched up like they always did when he heard something he didn’t quite understand “What? Why?”

You shrugged one shoulder, a small smile on your face “You don’t xray a pregnant woman unless absolutely necessary” his eyes widened and he didn’t say anything for several long heartbeats then he was across the room, pulling you into his arms “You’re pregnant?” “And hurting from my ribs” you reminded and he loosened his grip.

You cut your eyes up at him, feeling the knot in your stomach loosen “You’re happy?” he nodded “Yeah, I mean..aren’t you?” you shrugged “We’ve only been together a little over a year Jay. Do you want a baby with me?” he sat down on the bed next to you, one hand gently cupping your cheek while the other slipped around your waist “It doesn’t matter how long we’ve been together. I know I love you, I know this is it for me. I’d never want another woman to have my baby”

You felt tears spring to your eyes at his words “I love you too Jay” and he pulled you into his lap, being careful of your ribs as he whispered “I’m gonna be a dad,you’re gonna be a mom”

Jay was a dream your entire pregnancy. He was at your side for every appointment. Any time morning sickness got the best of you, he was holding your hair back then there with a warm rag and something to settle your stomach. Weird cravings? Even if it’s two am, you’re getting them.

Emotions getting the best of you? He’s figuring them out before you are and offering what you need. Back hurting? He’s rubbing it. He’s staying up at night just to talk to your growing stomach and draw patterns across it. If any man on earth was meant to be a dad it was Jay.

The day you found out it was a girl, a part of you had worried he’d be disappointed but no, he’d grinned at the ultrasound tech “Explains why she reacts to my voice so much. She’s already a daddy’s girl”

The day Lilian was born was a week before Halloween. Jay supported you so much during labor the nurses joked that he needed to teach other dads how it was done. If you hadn’t already been in love with him you would’ve fallen in love watching him with her. He was a natural at being a dad.

You were talking to Will next to his tree. Him and Nat had thrown a little get together Christmas eve so you and Jay came over. Jay was currently talking to Kim with Lilian secure across his chest in a baby sling, one hand at her tiny head and the other across her body.  

“He really is amazing at that isn’t he?” Will observed and you smiled proudly “He really is. You know he decorated the apartment with all the colors the pediatrician told us babies can see. He’s trying so hard to make sure when she gets older and looks back on photos that she doesn’t doubt for a moment that she’s always been loved” 

He smiled, “Did you take her to see Santa?” Santa this year was played by Mouch and you had indeed taken Lilian to see him. She’d cooed at him and the entire firehouse had fallen in love.  You pulled your phone out and clicked the photos to show him. He swiped through them “Those are too cute. Send them to me” 

You sent him a few then looked back over towards Jay and realized he was already looking at you, a small smile on his face. Where you originally worried your relationship was too new for a baby, if anything it made the love you had for each other grow even more.

Will cleared his throat and when you looked back at him he raised an eyebrow “So when are you getting upgraded to sister in law?” you felt your face warm and shoved playfully at his shoulder “Oh hush Halstead” he laughed “I’m serious! My little brother thinks the sun rises for you and Lilian. He needs to give you both the same last name”

You shook your head “I don’t need a ring to be Jay’s” he nodded “I know but still” you laughed “You sound like a mother hen Will”

You woke up slowly and realized you were alone in the bed. You sat up slowly, stretching as you did. You could hear Jay’s voice drifting in from the open door and knew he was talking to Lilian.

You swung your legs out of the bed and headed towards the living room. When you opened the door, your heart flipped at the sight that met you. Jay was sitting next to the tree, with the blinds open to show Lilian the snow falling. She was wearing her jumper that had rudolph and frosty all over it while Jay was wearing matching PJ pants. You were currently wearing a matching set.

He was talking low to her and while you couldn’t catch most of the words what you did catch was “Your first Christmas” “I love you and your mom more than anything” 

After a moment you stepped further out of the room and cleared your throat “Merry Christmas Lilian” Jay looked over at you, a broad smile slipping onto his face “Look! Mommy’s up!” you walked over to sit down next to them and leaned your head over on his shoulder “How long have you two been awake?”

He shrugged “About an hour. I wanted to let you sleep in” you pressed a kiss to his cheek “I love you” then leaned down to press a kiss to her forehead “And I love you”   

You reached for her so he transferred her into your arms then kissed your temple “I’ll go grab her bottle and start coffee” you nodded, holding her to your chest as you ran a finger across her features. When he came back he sat behind you, pulling you back against his chest before handing you her bottle.

__________________

The two of you sat like this a lot of mornings. Just holding her and enjoying each other. He wrapped his arms around you while you fed her, his chin resting on your shoulder. “This is the best christmas I’ve ever had” you cut your eyes up at him with a grin “You just woke up an hour ago”

He nodded “I woke up to her making little babbling sounds over the monitor with you curled up on my chest. I woke up feeling complete. You and her were missing pieces I never knew I needed” “Jay, don’t make me cry while I’m feeding her” he laughed lightly “I’m sorry baby” and kissed your cheek.

____________

After Lilian was fed and had a diaper change it was time to open presents. You and Jay took turns “helping” her open her presents. Considering how young she was it was mainly new outfits or diapers but watching Jay hold her and show her everything as he unwrapped it like she was going to give her opinion was better than anything you could’ve received.

Once you were fairly certain there were no more presents he pulled Lilian up to his ear and acted like she was saying something “Is that right? Where did he put it?” 

You raised an eyebrow “What are you doing?” he winked at you before standing up with Lilian and heading towards your bedroom. A few minutes later he returned with her and was holding something in his hand but considering it was under her you couldn’t see. You did notice he put another outfit on her.

“Jay?” you asked and he smiled “Wanna see her onesie?” you shrugged and stood up to walk over to him. He transferred her to your arms and you read that her onesie said “Will you marry Daddy?”

You looked back at him and realized he was already on one knee and had a ring in his hand. “Y/N I loved you by the time we were together a couple months,when a year hit I knew this was it for me. Then when you told me you were pregnant? Everything just clicked. You and her are my everything. She’s already a Halstead so do you think you’d like to be one before next Christmas?”

You nodded, fighting back tears “I’d love to marry you Jay” he slipped the ring onto your finger then stood, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips “Merry Christmas Mrs Halstead” you smiled against his lips “Merry Christmas Mr Halstead”

Lilian made a cooing noise so Jay broke away from your lips to kiss her forehead “And Merry Christmas to you little Miss Halstead”

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s5 episode 20 thoughts

last episode of the season!!!

things have seemed… tense lately between my best friends mulder and scully. i hope they can work it out. 

anyway, it says here that there is a boy with psychic powers… another child case. they deal with these so often!!!

but maybe he can unlock the secrets of the x files?? how?? i guess i will have to tune in!

post-episode thoughts: scully, i want to hug you. CSM, count your days. destroying information is a crime in my realm, and it will be punished with banishment. mulder, you need to learn how to talk about your feelings. i am no longer suggesting this politely. it must be done. now. skinner, you are the star on top of my metaphorical christmas tree. spender, my feelings towards you are pretty neutral.

we begin in vancouver, where a chess tournament is going on between a grown man and a child. there is a very large crowd and a guy who seems to be up to no good in the ceiling. 

the kid hears voices in his head as this sniper loads up a bullet… can he figure out what is about to happen?? but the voices just sound like weird noises!!!

noooo, don’t kill this little boy!!! he wins just in time, stands up, and the bullet hits the other guy!!! 

so he knew it was going to happen and won just in time to stand up…

leave this little boy alone!! don’t piss me off!!!

OHHH shortened intro AND new words on the screen today… “THE END” <- now there is a movie coming up shortly so i KNOW this is a lie!!!

i am preparing myself for some sort of cliffhanger….

ohohoho kryek is here today, according to the “guest starting” list…. getting ready for some rat-like activities

CSM is buttoning up his shirt as some people arrive upon his frosty property. they have guns… and his alarms are going off… 

BLAM! he shoots one man dead right then and there!! you really cannot underestimate this guy!!! unless we’re talking about his abilities to write fiction!!!

so he’s running barefoot into the snow??? yowch! bloody feet!

the guy in the mask catches him! OH SHIT! IT’S KRYCEK!! “go on! take your shot, alex” <- HOT DAMN! not the first name usage!

he says he was sent to being CSM back…….. by whomst?

there is a sticky note on mulder’s poster. i can’t tell what it says!

OH mulder has a picture of him and scully pinned to his board🥹that's fine that's super fine and i'm not gonna cry!

it’s skinner poking around their office!!! what is he doing down here??

HE WANTS TO KNOW MULDER’S LONG TERM PLANS?! and mulder says they’re right in his hands, referring to the x files

skinner loves his most special and difficult agents. it's true!

“what do you hope to find? i mean, in the end” (mulder looks at skinner suspiciously) “whatever i hope to find is in here. and maybe i’ll know when i find it”

now what is going on…..? something is afoot. somehow i doubt skinner just got randomly curious and started reading through the x files for the funsies.

skinner has a case for him: the assassination of a russian chess player. and agent spender was put in charge of the case by someone from OUTSIDE the bureau!! oh, that must be what has skinner so freaked out. who tf is just putting people in charge of cases?

(i mean, we, the audience, know the answer to this. but if i were skinner, i would be deeply uncomfy at the thought)

“he was very specific that you be excluded” (mulder smiles) lmaoooo

skinner's messy for that!!! and i giggled!!!

BAHAHA scully is in the room listening to spender debrief, and when mulder walks in, spender looks SO mad!! “please continue”, mulder says, after spender gets so caught off guard by seeing him that he literally cannot finish his sentence

you can try to separate mulder and scully, but the universe will find a way to reunite them. like a bonded pair of kitties. 

mulder asks him to rewind the tape and spender says basically no LMAOOO

“let me get through this, if you have any questions, we can talk later” “i-i don’t have any questions, no, i just think you’re wrong” <- LMAOOOOOO i’m at once giggling and cringing in second hand embarrassment 

mulder hates this dude, i'm crying!!!!

scully asks wtf mulder is doing, and he explains he thinks the killer was aiming for the boy!! spender reluctantly does rewind the tape, and mulder points out that the kid pushes back right before the bullet is fired. 

who is this random lady agreeing with mulder that the kid could sense the bullet coming…? he looks utterly shocked to hear her say this!!

and skinner says rewind it again so we can all see for ourselves LMAO everyone hates this spender mfer

(listen. sorry to this man, but i think it would also piss me off if some random guy got put in charge of an investigation because outside forces decreed it to be so)

sure enough, when spender rewinds the tape, the kid looks right at the camera!!! mulder turns to this random woman again in amazement 

meanwhile, krycek is bringing CSM back to the syndicate on a random side street. OH SHIT!! CSM calls them out right then and there for trying to kill him LMAOOO

that had to be awkward as hell! i'm giggling

CSM moves on from that pretty fast. he seems like the type to hold grudges, so perhaps this is part of his secret plot for revenge.

the well-groomed man (and i know that isn’t his name, but i can’t remember what it actually is, and when i tried to google it last time i got spoilers so: to me, he is WGM) says: the boy is a problem to us!! and i say: leave him alone!! let him play chess!!

CSM offers to kill the kid and well-groomed man says “dear god”... umm, well y’all were just trying to do that, so why now are we getting squeamish...!!!

this other dude is called “first elder” by the subtitles! good to know

CSM says he’ll do it… and walks off.

so this lady that was sticking up for mulder is named agent fowley, and scully is making polite small talk as mulder drives them... somewhere. she requested reassignment. hmm…

“1991, that’s about when you started work on the x files”, scully points out. “more or less, yeah”, mulder says. and does not elaborate.

(long lingering eye contact between mulder and fowley)

now… is this woman who i think she is……?

the boy (named gibson) is watching the simpsons. OH SHIT!!! “my name is fox… this is dana and diana”

SHE IS WHO I THOUGHT SHE WAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh man. oh man. okay, so i know a tiny bit about this. going bonkers rn.

what i DO know is enough to realize that diana is a controversial topic among the fandom, but i vow to speak my truth. as i always do. and i hope you will treat me with the grace you typically have afforded me.

gibson says he lives in the philippines, that mulder has a dirty mind, and he does NOT want to play any chess. yes, he truly is a psychic.

scully is like wtf is he going on about…. and mulder accuses the boy of being able to read minds

“i know what’s on your mind. i know you’re thinking about one of the girls you brought” (mildly amused scully look) “one of them’s thinking about you”

diana laughs and asks which one… gibson says mulder doesn’t want him to say.

(shakes head) hey! what’s going on?

mulder declares that gibson needs around the clock protection

oh, a canon-typical fight in the hallway between our agents on if this is possible or not… diana is listening in…. “you know what to do, diana”, mulder says before leaving <- hey. i don’t like that. the tone with which he speaks nor the implication of there being some pre-scully lilith-like figure.

“so you two know each other”, scully points out. “it was along time ago” (long lingering scully glance)

OHHHH spender is NOT letting mulder talk to the assassin… “you’re insulting me when you should be taking notes”, he says <- DAMN!!! the ego on this man! he isn't entirely wrong, but there is no humility about him!

he pushes past spender and gets into the cell, where the shooter claims spender hasn’t given him food or water. mulder orders him off to go get some. 

ohhh he’s playing hardball… he tells the dude that he’ll tell spender he fessed up to the kid being psychic… and if he cooperates with him, maybe he can get him into the witness protection program… does mulder hold this kind of influence?

mulder steals the food that was being brought for him. mulder! you're being a dick! on many fronts!

AWWW, scully and gibson are holding hands as she walks him down the hall :( he didn’t like the tests! poor kid! and he says scully’s wondering about “that other girl” and “she’s wondering about you, too” 

hey…. i get the sense we are pitting two bad bitches against each other via this little boy's mind reading. not a narrative choice i am fond of.

now a group of people are testing gibson for psychic abilities by holding up cards only they can see.

diana says she’s seen clairvoyants, but never of this skill level. she says she spent time with mulder is psychiatric hospitals?? scully.exe is not working 

she has to leave because she is weirded tf out…

(i don't blame her, though. i would also be very weirded out if my partner of 5 years had another partner he very evidently has a history with and never bothered to mention until she suddenly materialized. if i were scully, i'd be like hey mulder... remember all those times i tended to your wounds and held your sobbing body and broke the law for you? yeah, that was super cool. i love how we trust each other. anyway, wtf else are you hiding from me?)

((and i'm not saying that is necessarily the RIGHT or RATIONAL thing to feel, but c'mon. you can't look at me and tell me you wouldn't also be equal parts stung and curious))

shooter guy is being handed a note. it’s on a cigarette pack!!! and it says "you’re a dead man"!!! oh brother... not the CSM on the loose! how is he getting into these buildings still?!?!

LMAOOO???? WHAT IS SCULLY DOING WITH FROHIKE?!?!

look at her looking up into his camera system... she is just so PRETTY!!

bro is in his pajamas and has an absurd number of locks on his door. and i'm giggling!

she’s bringing the whole crew scans of gibson’s brain!! “and you want us to what?” “analyze the data. with an eye to the parapsychological” <- OHHH they’re gagged by that... and i am too! scully opening herself up to extreme possibilities?! or simply trying to anticipate and counter mulder's argument in favor of the kid's clairvoyance?

OHHHH.... SHE WANTS TO KNOW WHO TF DIANA IS LMAOOOOO 

i can’t tell if she’s jealous, or nosy, or both. but i can tell you that i love when scully is nosy. 

frohike says she was mulder’s “chickadee” (LMAO, crazy phrasing) out of the academy. she was with him when he discovered the x files. and she has some sort of background in parascience. whatever that means.

NOOOOO scully looks so sad 💔💔💔 MULDER, DON’T HIDE THINGS FROM HER!!! SHE’LL CRY

stop. stop!!!

gibson is watching cartoons while diana watches him. and here comes mulder. OH, she called him fox. don’t like that. i thought he was adamantly anti-being referred to as fox! is that a development from the past 5 years, or does she not care about what he thinks?

“i sense you could have used an ally, though- someone who thinks like you, with some background” HEY. WATCH HOW YOU TALK ABOUT SCULLY!!!

“oh, you mean scully?” now is that defensiveness i see in his eyes? he doesn’t sound like he’s laughing.

“she’s not what i’d call an open mind on the subject” <- well, diana, you don’t even know her!!! and just because you're right doesn't mean you should go around judging her!

he laughs, but it doesn’t feel like he really means it….

(i was trying to psychoanalyze everything in this godforsaken scene and i had NO idea what the vibe actually was LMAOOOO)

“she’s a, uh… she’s a scientist. she just makes me work for everything” <- HEY!!! what happened to her being “rigid, but in a wonderful way”??? defend her honor in her absence!

“yes, but i’m… i’m sure there were times when two like minds on a case would have been advantageous” <- well girl, from what i've heard, it sounds like you left and went to germany!

“i’ve done okay without you” okay. are we setting boundaries now? is this progress?

NO. it does not appear that this is the case. she is grabbing his hand. “hey. i’m on your side” side eye. from me. sounds like she is implying scully is NOT on his side, which i loathe. and please don’t kiss... i don’t want to see all that. 

where is scully going….? OH NO!!! she walked by and saw them holding hands!!

oh my god, she is leaving….. and i don’t blame her!!

the sad music!!!! stop!!!!! look at her sadly getting in her car!!!!! sadly staring at the wheel!!! sadly buckling up!!!! 

she sounds like she’s going to cry as she calls mulder and says she wants to show him something. and she doesn't want to show it to him there.

now why is agent spender rolling up as she heads out?! we have enough problems to deal with at this time that aren’t him!!!

OH SHIT!!! CSM IS TALKING TO HIM!!!! saying he gave him the case!!!!

he’s trying to give him some fatherly advice despite the fact this dude has no idea they are related. “you’re a bright boy” okay… well that is certainly an avuncular thing to say. perhaps uncomfortably so when coming from a guy you literally just met. “know which men to sacrifice and when” <- now that's some standard CSM advice.

OH SHIT!!!!!!! MULDER SEES HIM!! CSM retreats into the shadows. “i was told he was dead”, mulder pants. “well obviously whoever it is, he’s not” spender has literally no idea who tf this guy is………..

(laughing even harder at his response as i edit my notes. spender must think this mulder fellow is the weirdest dude alive)

i’m kinda laughing, because spender has no idea wtf is going on, while mulder’s world just got rocked upside down and inside out. that’s the devil that killed his dad and took his scully and killed scully’s sister!!! he thought the evil was defeated and it is back!!! poor spender is just here to chat with a stranger. he truly doesn't know anything about the situation! it's comical!

scully and mulder and all of spender’s team are in skinner’s office!!! she has the brain test results from gibson… and she is finding the results hard to believe…

something something about him having intense brain activity in the god something or other. maybe he is the next einstein??? well, that would be cool! yeah, get the little boy into nuclear physics!

but mulder thinks that maybe this intense brain activity will allow him to also explain all sorts of unexplained phenomena. 

i guess i can see the correlation between intense brain activity and psychic abilities, but how will it let him explore the jersey devil?

mulder proposes giving the killer immunity to explain wtf is going on, which spender immediately shoots down: “you want to give a murderer a free ride for the secrets to the pyramids?” <- well that is an oversimplification!

ANGRY SCULLY!!! “you mischaracterize what i’ve said” <- GET HIM AGAIN FOR ME!! “this would be quantifiable scientific proof of everything that agent mulder and i have investigated over the past five years”

i don’t really see the correlation from a plot perspective but okay ❤️ yay ❤️

oh diana, i am suspicious of you…. “how do you quantify the spiritual? it can’t be done. you ask for immunity for a killer on that basis, the attorney general’s gonna go off. you’re allowed to investigate the x files as an indulgence. but draw the wrong kind of attention and they’ll close you down”

okay………… rude. but not necessarily wrong. in fact, she seems quite right, at least about the attorney general shutting down the case part. clearly, some levels of spirituality can be quantified if the results show up on brain scans; scully will use science to find a way. scully glances at mulder, who is staring at diana

“put an end to all your work. something i happen to have an interest in myself” WELL NO ONE ASKED???? girl! it isn't your project!!

perhaps i am the one who will need immunity from the attorney general as i bravely ask the question i am thinking: am i bad feminist, or is diana supposed to piss me off?

scully’s watching mulder stare at diana……. skinner says, everyone go take a break. but you may absolutely NOT leave my office, mulder. 

he says that diana is right. if they poke around too much they’ll get shut down- but mulder is willing to risk it!!!!!

“if what agent scully’s found is true- and i have every reason to believe that it is- then the answers i might have spent a lifetime searching for may fall together like a million puzzle pieces” <- OHH!! FAITH IN SCULLY!! FAITH IN SCULLY GIVING HIM THE TRUTH!

“you’d risk the x files?”, asks skinner.

“how soon can you call the attorney general?” 

so, there is your answer.

mulder is always having some sort of power struggle with skinner. hey. can mulder, buddy. can we use a "please" and "thank you" every now and then? your old pal skinner has put up with a LOT of your nonsense!

bro is in his cranky era.

ohhhh, so he goes and tell the shooter that he gave his request for immunity, but the attorney general needs more information before she can make a decision… “i need answers from you” UH OH!! will he have them before CSM breaks in? because we know he is stalking his prey!

he says the kid is a missing link; he’s genetic proof. spender wants to know of what, and this is very convenient, because so do i. so he thinks the kid is part alien….. spender is heckling him for this. but CSM is on the prowl… we don't have time for interpersonal conflict!

(so, maybe he's part alien but distantly? or maybe they made one of the alien hybrids like emily, but this one didn't die? why did emily die, again? because we know there are plenty others of the alien hybrids because they had that whole bit about saving "their mothers" back in... i think it was s3? maybe a bunch of them, like emily, die, but some of them do survive, and gibson is a son of the half alien? so he is a quarter alien? or maybe he is from a different alien race?

everything is a bit foggy when it comes to mytharc, i suppose. i guess it all comes down to the writers wanting to torture my best friend agent scully)

well-groomed man and krycek pull up to heckle CSM, which is an important part of their job description. they’re saying he failed them, but CSM says it’s all part of the plan. take their pieces one by one. 

hey, you’re gonna kill the kid, aren’t you?

at least JFK was a grown man!!!

do you think he bulk ordered the cigarettes from like, the cigarette equivalent of sam’s club, and had them sent to his snowy canadian hideaway? i mean, the number he goes through, it should have raised some red flags for the people trying to find him!

scully is watching the boy watch cartoons. she is pondering. 

“how do you do it?” “i just hear you thinking… like on a radio. and sometimes there are lots of radios, and i want to shut them off and watch some TV” <- you know what, that is entirely understandably.

gibson says that scully doesn’t care what other people think… “except for her. the other one”

is she trying to impress diana…..? has she moved beyond vying for people's approval after the horrors of cancer and emily, or is it manifesting in a new way as she hopes this mysterious figure from mulder's past will approve of her? does she think that if diana likes her, mulder will let her in about his past? does she feel a solidarity despite their differences in belief because of the fact they are both women in a male-dominated field?

the implications... i must explore them.

ah. and in diana comes. 

scully says they’ll talk about that stuff later. queen of knowing the time and place to have a debrief. and he says “they want to kill me” OHHH poor little gibson :( just let him watch cartoons!

scully promises no one will hurt him :( and he says “i know you do" :(

is diana going to kill the kid…..?

(author's note: LMAO!! listen... i thought they were going with the double agent angle for about 2 minutes. in my defense, i'm still shocked from the whole krycek and marita thing, so i'm trying to expect the unexpected. this is not the most wildly incorrect plot point i have guessed!)

the shooter gets another note…  this time it’s an empty cigarette carton, and BAM!!! CSM SHOOTS HIM!!!

well. there goes any possibility of an explanation.

diana fell asleep watching gibson and he’s looking out the window!!! he says there’s a man with a gun!!! and he says he’s aiming at her!!!! and BAM!! she gets shot too!!

hey guys! once again i ask what’s going on.

mulder and scully are pulling in while diana gets taken into an ambulance. and mulder’s grasping her hand while scully just wants to know where tf the kid is!!!!

the shooter was killed!!! skinner shows mulder the cigarette carton!!!!! 

NOOOO!! CSM has the boy and is bringing him to the well-groomed man. gibson called him a liar when he said he won't get hurt.

“you’ve never had the stomach for our business”

“just not for your practices”

“i’m a necessity. the complement to your cowardice” <- omggg……..

the dichotomy between CSM and well-groomed man... were the girls writing old man yaoi back when this aired? because i bet they would if this show dropped now.

(i was about to joke that if we all work really hard now, we can make that ship trend, but how tf can you write romantic fanfiction between two nameless characters? yeesh. that has to be a pain. "the well-groomed man moved in closer towards the cigarette smoking man, inhaling his burnt, acidic scent; he knew he was as bad for him as the cancer coursing through the other man's bloodstream" <- yeah, i didn't enjoy typing that, and it isn't fun to read either)

“your work is done now” SO WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO TO THE BOY???

“my work is just beginning” nope. do not like that. 

well-groomed man leads gibson into the car driven by krycek, who says he has a nice straight shot at CSM!!! but well-groomed man says not to shoot. you may need him in the future.

krycek is the last man i would trust with a child.

WOAHHHHH mulder is ATTACKING SPENDER saying he will get him PROSECUTED FOR MURDER!!! “you’re wrong, agent mulder, it’s your days that are numbered” <- NOW WHAT DOES *THAT* MEAN??

is he collaborating with daddy to kill mulder or lead him down an incredibly intricate path leading to his peril?!?

NOOOOO, skinner is on the phone with scully in mulder’s apartment 💔 spender is going after mulder and there are talks of reassignment!

his first question when she gets off of the phone is about diana….

NOOO, the justice department wants to close down the x files 💔💔

mulder says this is all part of plan he couldn’t see and walked into

“this time they may have won” NOOOOO💔💔💔💔you have to find some faith!

CSM is in mulder’s office………. looking at the files….. PICKING OUT THE ONE ON SAMANTHA………… WHERE IS HE TAKING IT???

TO SPENDER?!! “who are you?” “i’m your father” <- YOOO, I DIDN’T THINK HE WOULD JUST OUT AND SAY IT??

DID HE LIGHT ALL THE OTHER FILES ON FIRE???

HOLY HELL, HE DID???

mulder is here in his t shirt and scully is here in a lab coat and they find their whole office burnt to a crisp!!!!

she grabs his arms and leans in, putting her head on his chest as he looks around in fury

woah…. woaugh……….

the end.

CSM ruined the work of their whole lives!!!

this is why archivists are so important. because they always keep files saved on at least 3 sources. inshallah the good FBI archivists had them on a bunch of floppy disks. please please please.

(i started to type “on a bunch of flash drives”, but then i realized idk if those were popular, effective, or invented at the time. and a floppy disk really couldn’t hold much. maybe there is a huge cardboard box in one of the back rooms with all of them backed up! i like the ones that were colorful!)

well, now there’s a damn movie i need to watch!!! but first i have to get all of my s5 content sorted out!!!!

i have many questions. i have a terrible feeling that poor boy is gonna end up another sacrificial lamb. and i know that CSM saved the file on samantha to keep the fire burning beneath mulder, just enough so he meets his dastardly plans. damn. this guy really is an evil genius. which does not translate to literary talent.

what is spender going to do? is he going to believe that CSM is his father? will he follow him in dastardly deeds, or will he reject them? i mean, he sure isn't a believer in aliens like mulder is, so learning his father is basically a diplomat to the alien people isn't going to go over well. or is he going to stand up to daddy and save the day, probably nobly sacrificing himself in the process?

what about scully? i just KNOW she blames herself for gibson getting kidnapped because she promised him he would be safe, and she's all torn up about mulder hiding things from her!!! poor scully!

and mulder, what is he going to do about the reappearance of diana and then her sudden death or near-death? will he stop being so cranky anytime soon? it doesn't seem likely, but a girl can hope.

and i wanna know what is going through skinner's mind, too. because he really is like an uncle to me. i remember my earlier posts about not trusting him, and i think that narrative was intentionally cultivated by the writers, but now i'm thinking, man. that's my ride or die. skinner, i should have never doubted you. not only that, i love your little house buddha and desk globes and i wish i could slap mulder across the face for the way he acts towards you!

well, i have a lot of work to do with the s5 wrapups before i can dive into this film, and so work i must. and perhaps i will save the film for next weekend when i can focus appropriate attention.

i also expect that the movie writeup will be VERY LONG. and my writeups are already SO LONG. i tossed around the idea of splitting it up into parts, but i think it will be better to just do it all in one go. unless there is a very clear midpoint spot where i can divide the post in two, which i doubt???

will diana grow on me? will the movie be enjoyable? will scully get a damn break? will CSM and WGM kiss? will krycek continue to be a problematic bisexual?

hmm. well, stay tuned, and share all of your thoughts!

[possiblylando]

Okay at this point we just need to accept that Johnny Boy "Yura" Hishaku is on Aizen levels of planning. He has his fingers in every pie and has been accounting for damn near every possibility like he can see the future.

He's been shown to rapidly change his plans based entirely upon brand new information. He did not have any information about Hakuri's true abilities yet he had that shit on lock day 1 he somehow managed to adapt his plan to take advantage of the poor boy. Like Chapter 54;

When this chapter first came out and for a few chapters after I thought this was a stupid idea. Why would he give two swords to Hirohiko and have them fly around out in the open? HE WAS ACCOUNTING FOR BOTH POSSIBILITIES. The attacks on Uruha and Samura where intentional. He attacked Uruha first to make it seem random then Samura because he needed Samura's blood so he could have Bloodsucker Supreme overhere (Gonna call her Lily until we get a real name that seems to be what people are calling her) to track down Samura's daughter. But he adapted that plan once Hakuri was in the picture. If Hakuri hadn't been in the picture I doubt the swords would've moved hands at all. The plan was for Hirohiko to use whichever sword wasn't teleported. It became a 50/50 chance and in both scenarios the Hishaku still win. >If Hakuri had teleported Uruha's blade then they wait until Samura kills Uruha or Samura gets his hands back on his blade at which point he kills Uruha anyway. >If they killed Samura in the attack they have Tobimune ready for Hirohiko to use. Capital J Yura overhere has created a spider's web of plans which have so many branching paths and contingencies I don't think he can lose without a wildcard being put into play. It's becoming more and more clear that every single member of the Hishaku is there INTENTIONALLY. Everyone serves a purpose and the fact he sent out the flicker gooner demon himself means that he has a bigger role to play in this attack than just being the muscle. Lily is apart of the Hishaku and is far more lowkey than Kuguri.

In the next 10-20 chapters it's gonna be revealed that some minor action that happened at the school was just another chess piece on Yura's 5th dimensional chess board.

Chihiro breaks into Hishaku HQ and Yura reveals he set up a home alone-esq series of sorcerous traps which have been tailor made to counter Enten.

[green-lights-33]

Hello friend I hope you’re having the loveliest day <3

I would love love love it if you drew Remus and Sirius dancing!

Thank you for blessing us with your incredible art ���

[unordinary-diary]

Seraphina’s Nightmare

A dream sequence looking at Seraphina’s headspace after the season 1 finale.

There is no audio, it’s not broken.

I made this for a project in my film class because I simply couldn’t think about anything other than UnOrdinary. It was going to be about twice this length but I ran out of time before my deadline.

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible

[crossbackpoke-check]

re last answer: please don't stop, being very unhinged about these two pretty white boys is helping distract me from the sharks losing streak rn so bring it on

https://www.tumblr.com/bondedpairs/764566430180147200?source=share

(sideblog woes but there's the link for you) anyway in the vid they talk about going over to each other's houses to have dinner and things and while that is a delicious example of their codependence i love it bc through an rpf lens there is definitely some old man ******* going on. they can have the dilfs and each other.

(someone else mentioned kept boys which i could write an essay on but i fear being Perceived™️)

anyway if you have anything to add to this please do, if not ignore me and i will hide under a rock until the stress-related insanity has worn off and i am a functioning member of society once more 😂

- @bondedpairs

ty for the video!!! and please, WRITE THE KEPT BOYS ESSAYYYY i promise i will read it with my hands over my eyes if you don’t want to be perceived. do it scared!! do it anyway!! we’ll all love you for it!!!

[themyscirah]

Okay so basically the United States MINT of all people is going to be working with DC to make a line of coins! These coins sadly won't be in circulation (the things I would do to live in a world where I could get Batman coins from the supermarket) as they're collectors coins, but will be releasing over the course of the next 3 years, 2025-2027.

Designs haven't been released yet (the same is true for all 2025 designs) but we know there will be 9 coins in total (3 each year) with the first year featuring (of course!!!) Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman.

Although we know the first three heroes to be featured, the remaining six have yet to be decided, and it turns out the Mint is putting out a survey on their site to gauge which of a group of culturally significant heroes people want to see most! (link to the form is mentioned in the article above)

The considered group includes: Supergirl, the Flash, Green Arrow, Black Canary, Captain Marvel, John Stewart GL, Aquaman, Hawkman, Jamie Reyes BB, Robin (Damian?), Cyborg, and Batgirl, of which 6 will be selected.

As someone who does a bit of coin collecting myself (mainly circulation coins like the quarters sets, but I also have a couple proof and collectors coins) I think this is a really cool and interesting idea that showcases the history of the comics medium and these characters and their influence on American culture. Really excited to wait and see what the designs look like for the coins already announced!

[the-kipsabian]

aew posted a short on their youtube page two days ago (im only seeing this now as i dont follow them or watch shorts unless its something intriguing like this)

its about miro beating orange cassidy

this is some terrible foreshadowing (that i dont wanna say ive been calling before buuut)

[kaijutegu]

Alligator Body Language and You, or: How To Know When An Alligator On Social Media is Being Stressed for Views

Alligators are wild animals. Despite the idiotic claims of animal abusers like Jay Brewer, they cannot be domesticated, which means they are always going to react on the same natural instincts they've had for millions of years. Habituated, yes. Tamed, yes. Trained, definitely. Crocodilians can form bonds with people- they're social and quite intelligent. They can solve problems, use tools, and they're actually quite playful. Alligators are also really good at communicating how they're feeling, but to somebody who doesn't spend much time around them, their body language can be a bit mystifying. And it doesn't help when social media influencers are saying shit like this:

That is not what a happy gator looks like.

That's a terrified, furious gator who isn't attacking because the ogre handling her has her in a chokehold. She's doing everything she can to express her displeasure, and he's lying about it because he knows his audience doesn't even know how to think critically about what he's doing. He knows that because his audience doesn't know anything about these animals, he can get away with it. This I think is why I hate him so much- he deliberately miseducates his audience. He knows what he's doing is factually inaccurate, he just doesn't care because attention means more to him than anything else in the world.

Let's change that! Here are two really important lessons for understanding alligator body language on social media.

Lesson 1: Alligators Don't Smile (in fact, most animals don't)

So what's going on in this video? Jay Brewer is aggressively choking his white alligator Coconut while scrubbing algae off of her with a toothbrush. And make no mistake, he is digging into the creature's throat while she is visibly distressed. He claims she's happy- but she's not. He is willfully misrepresenting what this animal is feeling. That's a problem, because people... well, we actually kind of suck at reading other species' body language. The reason for this is that we tend to overlay our own responses on their physical cues, and that's a problem. For example, let's look at an animal with a really similar face to ours, the chimpanzee. Check out Ama's toothy grin!

Wait, no. That's not a happy smile. That's a threat display. When a chimpanzee "smiles," it's either terrified and doing a fear grimace, or it's showing you its teeth because it intends on using them in your face.

How about a dog? Look at my smiling, happy puppy!

Oh wait no, this is a picture of Ryder when he was super overwhelmed by noise and people during a holiday party. He'd hopped up in my sister's lap to get away from stuff that was happening on the floor and was panting quite heavily. See the tension in the corners of his mouth and his eyes? A lot of the time when a dog "smiles," the smile isn't happy. It's stress! Why Animals Do The Thing has a nice writeup about that, but the point is, our body language is not the same as other species. And for reptiles, body language is wildly different.

For instance, look at these two alligators. Pretty cute, right? Look at 'em, they're posing for a Christmas card or something! How do you think they're feeling?

Well, I'll tell you how the normal one is feeling. He's annoyed! Why is he annoyed? Because the albino just rolled up, pushed another gator off the platform, and is trying to push this guy, too. I know this because I actually saw it happen. It was pretty funny, not gonna lie. He's not gaping all the way, but he was hissing- you can actually see him getting annoyed in the sequence I took right before this shot. Look at him in this first shot here- he's just relaxing, and you can see he isn't gaping even a little bit.

By the end, he's expressing displeasure, but not enough to actually do anything about it. He's annoyed, but he's comfy and that's where one of the best basking areas is, so he'll put up with it.

Reptiles open their mouths wide for a lot of reasons, but never because they are actively enjoying a sensation. Unless they're eating. No reptile smiles- they can't. They don't even have moveable lips. If a reptile is gaping, it's doing so because:

It is doing a threat display.

It is making certain vocalizations, all of which are threats. Alligators are one of the rare reptiles that do regularly vocalize, but most of their calls aren't made with a wide open mouth.

It is about to bite something delicious or somebody stupid. Check out this video- virtually all of the gaping here is anticipatory because these trained gators know darn well that the bowl is full of delicious snacks. (I have some issues with Florida's Wildest, but the man knows how to train a gator AND he is honest about explaining what they're doing and why, and all of his animals are healthy and well-cared for, and he doesn't put the public or his staff at risk- just himself.)

It's too hot and it has opened its mouth to vent some of that heat and thermoregulate. This is the main reason why alligators will often have their mouths part of the way open, but sometimes they'll open all the way for thermoregulation. This is what a thermoregulatory gape looks like- usually it's not all the way open, kinda more like < rather than V, but you can't say that 100% of the time. Additionally, a thermoregulatory gape... typically happens when it's hot out. If they're inside, maybe they've been under their basking light for too long. Heat's the dominant factor, is what I'm getting at.

There is another reason that a captive crocodilian might be gaping, and that's because it's doing so on command. Some places have their gators trained to gape on cue, like St. Augustine Alligator Farm and other good zoos. They have the animals do this in presentations that are genuinely educational. They ask the animals to open their mouths so that they can show off their teeth and demonstrate how their tongues seal off the back of their mouth. They'll also do it as part of routine healthcare, because looking at their teeth is important.

In this case, the animals aren't gaping because they're stressed, they're gaping because they know they're gonna get a piece of chicken or fish if they do it. And what's more, they're doing it on cue. They have a specific command or signal that tells them to open wide. It's not an instinctive response to a situation. It's trained. If the animal provides the behavior after a cue, the situation is much less likely to be negatively impactful.

It's also important to remember that there's a difference between a partially open mouth and a gape! As discussed above, alligators will often have their mouths a little bit open just to maintain temperature homeostasis. It helps them stay comfy, temperature-wise. These guys are all doing thermoregulatory open-mouthed behavior- that slight open and relaxed body posture is a dead giveaway. (That and it's the hottest spot in the enclosure.)

Lesson 2: A Happy Gator Is A Chill Gator

So if alligators don't smile or have facial expressions other than the :V that typically signifies distress, how else can you tell how they're feeling? One way is stillness. See, alligators subscribe to the philosophy of if it sucks... hit da bricks.

Basically, if they hate it, they'll leave. Unless, y'know, somebody has their meaty claws digging into their throat or is otherwise restraining them. (Restraint isn't always bad, btw. Sometimes the animal is going through a medical thing or needs to be restrained for their safety- which a responsible educator will explain.)

Let's look at a very similar scenario, in which a captive alligator is getting his back scrubbed.

As you can see, it's quite different. First, he's not being restrained at all. Second, look at how relaxed he is! He's just chilling there vibing! He could simply get up and leave if he wanted to, because he's not being held. Towards the end of the video, as he lifts his head, you can see that his respiratory rate is very even as his throat flutters a bit. I'm not sure what this facility is, so I can't comment on care/general ethics, but like. In this specific case, this is an alligator enjoying being scrubbed! And you can tell because he's not doing anything. A happy gator is content to be doing what they're doing.

Why Should I Listen To You?

Now, you should ask yourself, why should you listen to me? Why should you trust me, who does not own an alligator, versus Jay Brewer, who owns several?

Well, first off, there's no profit for me in telling you that what you're seeing on social media is in fact not what you're being told you're seeing. I'm not getting paid to do this. That's the thing with people who make social media content. The big names aren't doing it just for fun. They're doing it for money. Whether that's profit through partnerships or sponsorships, or getting more people to visit their facilities, or ad revenue, you can't ignore the factor of money. And this is NOT a bad thing, because it allows educators to do what they're passionate about! People deserve to be paid for the work that they do!

But the problem starts when you chase the algorithm instead of actually educating. A "smiling" alligator gets the views, and if people don't know enough to know better, it keeps getting the views. People love unconventional animal stories and they want those animals to be happy- but the inability to even know where to start with critically evaluating these posts really hinders the ability to spread real information. Like, this post will probably get a couple hundred notes, but that video of Coconut being scrubbed had almost 400,000 likes when I took that screenshot. Think about how many eyeballs that's reached by now. What I'm saying here is that it's just... really important to think critically about who you're getting your information from. What do dissenters say in the comments? What do other professionals say? You won't find a single herpetologist that has anything good to say about Prehistoric Pets, I can tell you that right now.

Another reason you can trust me is that my sources are not "just trust me bro," or "years of experience pretending my pet shop where animals come to die is a real zoo." Instead, here are my primary sources for my information on alligator behavior:

Dragon Songs: Love and Adventure among Crocodiles, Alligators, and Other Dinosaur Relations- Vladimir Dinets

The Secret Social Lives of Reptiles- J. Sean Doody, Vladimir Dinets, Gordon M. Burghardt

Social Behavior Deficiencies in Captive American Alligators (Alligator mississippiensis)- Z Walsh, H Olson, M Clendening, A Rycyk

Social Displays of the American Alligator (Alligator mississippiensis)- Kent Vliet

Social Signals and Behaviors of Adult Alligators and Crocodiles- Leslie Garrick, Jeffery Lang

Never smile at a crocodile: Gaping behaviour in the Nile crocodile at Ndumo Game Reserve, South Africa- Cormac Price, Mohamed Ezat, Céline Hanzen, Colleen Downs (this one's Nile crocs, not American alligators, but it's really useful for modeling an understanding of gape behaviors and proximity)

Thermoregulatory Behavior of Captive American Alligators (Alligator mississippiensis)- Cheryl S. Asa, Gary D. London, Ronald R. Goellner, Norman Haskell, Glenn Roberts, Crispen Wilson

Unprovoked Mouth Gaping Behavior in Extant Crocodylia- Noah J. Carl, Heather A. Stewart, Jenny S. Paul

Thank you for reading! Here's a very happy wild alligator from Sanibel for your trouble.

[methoughtsphantom]

HELL YEAH CROWN PRINCE PHANTOM whose ectoplasmic signature readings are obviously higher than that of his dad’s, who’s still filtering the corrupted ectoplasm and that takes time, (which is why he only wears the crown and not the ring.) So imagine, imagine that the imaginary of the vengeful angel was only visible to Danny, just like the crown, like imperceptible to human eyes kinda thing. To Batman Red Hood is just another ecto-entity who caught him off guard, and so he has to be better prepared. He goes see the JLD to ask for more information about these entities. They tell him one is the ghost king. Cuz mages can get a read in signatures and one is off the charts level powerful, or maybe Batman just had a scanner I dunno, point is Batman wrongly deduces whose the ghost king in this situation. After all, only one was able to actually display a tangible supernatural form and readings that remained steady during the scan. ((Jason’s are unreliable, funky if he’s not trying and bitch-you-better-start-running if he is.))

So. Batman wants to summon the ghost king. He doesn’t see a reason to involve the JL, just him and Constantine, who’s like ?? I heard there was new management, but…so new that the king’s a literal child?? okay I gotta see this. im putting a bunch of binds and spells so the ghost won’t be able to cross the summoning circle. Like Constantine just has Batman’s initial assessment and a power chart. Bruce’s detailed report indicates the kid has no experience on battle combat and instead just heavily relies on his powers (list of known powers not conclusive), but is still a threat that knows his and his associates secret identity. Curiously, the Bat also put that the kid is heavily suspected of being emotionally compromised.

Anyways

They expect a child.

They get the Red Hood.

Red Hood, who is still a bat, and still trained with assassins. Motherfucker whose ectoplasm readings are again so funky he can pass through the summoning’s restrains and binds as if they are not there. He’s such a little shit about how he’s sprinting the whole thing. He’s ghost adjacent enough he can turn intangible. He’s an expert on combat who can fucking predict what the bat’s planning to pull because he fought alongside him. Dramatic bitch saw Batman and immediately went to throw hands. Especially when the the Bat tries to pull off a gun on him.

Jason: oh so you’re using guns now??? you’re really such a hypocrite!!

Batman: I’m not the one whose letting a child cover for their criminal activities!!

…

Batman, at some point: I would never hurt my own son!!

Jason:

Jason: 🤡

…

Batman: how do you know our identities???

Jason, who didn’t know B knew he knew and who also had a pretty hardcore pretty little liars phase ✨: two can keep a secret if one of them is dead. bitch.

Batman:

Batman: this is confirmation. a dead figure from my past told him i’m Batman

…..

Batman, who’s still trying to see an angle to the Red Hood: You are obviously unfit to take care of a child

Jason:

Danny, 15 and thoroughly done with everyone's crap, steals the Crown of Fire and the Skeleton Key and uses the later to find a suitable new High King for the Infinite Realms. The key (also known as Deaths kay) acted like a sort of Infi-map but lacked the limitations of needing a natural portal to spawn in that time/location and could get you past any wards/protections no mater how powerful.

The key spawns him just in front of the form of a sleeping Jason Todd, and Danny decided he wasn't going to question the magical keys judgment and just plops the crown on a bleary and startled Jasons head.

The crown burned for this guy, signaling that it found him worthy and that was more than enough for Danny.

With no context whatsoever, Danny looked Jason in the eye, burning neon green meeting with wide greenish blue, "You're our king now."

Then he vanished.

Jason later finds that the Lazarus entity left behind a handmade pamphlet. It was immensely unhelpful.

[corkinavoid]

DPxDC "Pick Me Up"

The stream goes live on the first day of the school year. It's the usual song and dance - mad laughing, threats, poor jokes, terror, and about thirty kids huddled together in a classroom behind Joker's back. Tim recognizes it as one of the Gotham Academy classrooms. Dick can't imagine the horror those kids' parents must be feeling right now. Jason jokes about middle school traumatic experiences. Damian is feeling very justified for skipping classes today.

Bruce, all suited up in his Batman garb, is making his way to the Academy as fast as he possibly can. Those are kids.

Gotham is once again anxiously kept on the edge of their seats, watching as Joker decides to interview the kids on their learning experience so far. Something about leaving a good first impression on the new generation or some other bullshit. Most kids stutter over their words - it's true that Gothamites are way more composed when facing life-threatening events, but those kids are only fourteen or fifteen for the most part. They are not old enough to keep their cool in the face of a murder clown.

That is, until Joker points his camera at one of the girls. Black hair in a high ponytail, blue eyes without a trace of fear, a slightly displeased, even bored expression on her face. She looks straight into the camera, not even waiting for the laughing madman to finish his question, and deadpans:

"I don't think I like school. Pick me up, please."

Joker sputters.

"Not so scared, I see," he sneers, and, in the next moment, a comically large gun painted in purples and greens is pointed to the girl's forehead, "How about now?"

The girl scrunches her nose and makes a so-so gesture.

"It's kinda meh," she admits, "Like, yeah, points for style, but you know, size doesn't matter. It's all in the technique."

Dick snorts over the comms. It's a bad time for laughing, sure, but the phrase caught him off-guard. This is not what you'd expect to hear from a teen, and definitely not something you'd expect anyone to say to the Joker. Jason's comms are muted, but Barbara knows he also laughed a little.

"Technique, you say?" Joker hisses, pressing the gun closer to the girl's head, and she winces, leaning away from it, almost as if she is disgusted by the touch.

"Yeah, I mean, guns are not that scary anyway. What are you gonna do with them, blast my brains all over the floor? Been there, done that," the girl shrugs, "Kinda nasty, but overall, it's just like slime, only sticky." She pauses and looks to the side, seemingly lost in thought, "Huh, maybe we should have added Borax to it. Or was it baking soda?.."

"Listen here, you little brat," Joker's fingers catch the girl's chin, and his voice becomes sickeningly menacing. Bruce is almost there, just two more minutes. Tim is already grappling onto the wall.

But none of them get to finish.

"Put your dirty fingers away from my sister," a low, cold, and even in a way that speaks of barely contained fury, voice comes from out of the screen.

The camera spins, like whoever is holding it turned really fast, and everyone watching the stream sees a fairly normal guy standing by the window - a turtleneck and ripped jeans, same black hair as the girl, same blue eyes... Wait, they are not blue.

And that's not a guy.

The camera falls down to the floor, and there are a lot of panicked screams coming from the broadcast now, but none of them sound like children's voices. It's the screams of adults, of grown-ass men, and later, someone even claimed they heard Joker's scream among them, too. The picture on camera glitches a few times, and the angle is awkward, but everyone still gets to see how shadows in the room morph into eyes, wide open and green, and how the darkness grows sharp teeth, countless grinning mouths that don't belong to any faces.

Screams turn into gargling and then to quiet whispers, filling the ears of all those listening with countless words in languages they don't know.

Red Robin turns off the recording and looks to that same guy from the levestream, sitting across him on the couch. The guy - Daniel, or Danny, as he introduced himself - looks him in the eyes and raises an eyebrow.

"Okay, and?"

"How did you do it?" Tim asks for the third time this evening. Danny blinks.

"Did what?" He asks, completely incomprehending. Tim groans. He's been trying to get his answers, any answers at this point, from the guy for thirty fucking minutes already. So far, he's got nothing. Danny, whoever the fuck he is, proves to be the most annoying human being on Earth.

"Seven people in a coma, including Joker himself, with no physical injuries and none of the children remember a thing! How?!" He demands, and a girl's face peeks from around the corner:

"I remember!"

Tim snaps his head at her, "What do you remember?"

The girl pauses, blinks, and looks to Danny. Then shrugs, "My brother picked me up from school."

Tim drops his head down and breathes out in frustration. He can't force the information out of civilians, he is a vigilante, not a mafia.

"Would it make you feel better if I promise not to do it again?" Danny asks, and his voice is way too innocent for Tim to believe him. He raises his head to look the guy in his shameless, amused eyes.

"I hate you."

"Thanks," Danny grins.

[neroushalvaus]

Tumblr in the 60s

☮ monkeewholock follow

🎉🎉CONGRATULATIONS UNITED KINGDOM ����🎊🎉🎉🎉🎉BYE BYE GROSS INDECENCY!!!!🌈🌈🌈 62 countries have now legalized sexual activities between men🌈🌈🌈

🐞 homophilespock follow

SPIRK CAN FINALLY FUCK

🚀 starrfleet follow

They are American, not British... But I'm pretty sure spirk has always been able to fuck since the show is set in the future.

📻 lesbianbobdylan follow

Christ, this is not about your cutesy uwu yaoi otp, go outside and smoke some grass

10,8 t. notes

🌻 flowerpower follow

Politicians are not your friends but damn Kennedy is fine, I look at one (1) picture of him and my head literally explodes

🌻 flowerpower follow

...i just woke up, why is my askbox full

🌻 flowerpower follow

WHY IS HE TRENDING I'M SCARED

🌻 flowerpower follow

guys stop reblogging this it's been like five years i've changed

290,9 t. notes

🎹 nixonsafascist follow

do you think they call him little richard because he has a little. Richard

🎹 nixonsafascist follow

easy website

58,1 t. notes

🇻🇳 shirellesofficial follow

Being the only lesbian in your friend group sucks so bad. "beatles or stones??" i will kill you

🗣 lavendermenaceisreal-deactivated72537262

Disrespecting female social groups for male validation? Typical lesbian behaviour.

🇻🇳 shirellesofficial follow

Mike Jacker isnt gonna fuck you

🇻🇳 shirellesofficial follow

Oh no I think she couldn't handle that

77 notes

✌ draftdodgerdyke

DM me for the addresses of my Swedish and Canadian friends. Do not put your personal information in the reblogs.

🙍‍♀️ silvermilk follow

You should be ashamed of yourself.

✌ draftdodgerdyke

huh??

🙍‍♀️ silvermilk follow

I said, you should be ashamed of yourself. You disgust me. I assure you, when the commies attack us, you will not find your silly little post "groovy" anymore.

✌ draftdodgerdyke

Jesus, don't flip your wig

🙍‍♀️ silvermilk follow

My father fought in ww2 for you ungrateful degenerate.

✌ draftdodgerdyke

Don't see what your daddy's unsexiness has to do with me and my lads taking a sexy sexy trip to Sweden.

#anyway only hot guys dodge the draft

587 notes

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians follow

in every interview i watch of the beatles they are so DONE and trolling everybody, these fucking annoying BITCHES, i need them inside me so badly

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians follow

#this but not john lennon #i just can't forget the heinous things he said about jesus

idk I actually think it was very sexy of him, stop trying to cancel john in my post

✝️ jesusrevolution follow

The reading comprehension on this website is piss poor. John literally didn't mean he was greater than Jesus or better than Jesus, he was just trying to make a point about the world becoming more secular. Cancel culture has gone too far.

🚷 to-hell-with-the-beatles follow

How dare you say we piss on the poor?? Jesus died for Mr Lennon's sins and it's not "cancelling" to send him a few respectably worded death threats to remind him of that. He cancelled our Lord first!

✝️ jesusrevolution follow

Girl Jesus literally said it's cool, I dropped acid yesterday and saw Him and He told me.

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians follow

help the girls (christians) are fighting in my beatles thirst post

6,008 notes

🛼 donovandyke follow

I will be glued to the tv today. If you don't want to hear about it, just blacklist #moonlanding !!

0 notes

🗣 claudeberger4ever-deactivated98975287

Hi I'm new to the Hair musical fandom so I'm not super invested in the whole discourse, but I just felt like this needed to be said: Friendly reminder that not being against the war in Vietnam does not make you a bad person!

🥁 ringoforpresident follow

it literally does tho

✌ draftdodgerdyke

Another win for us hot guys

17,2 t. notes

[where-does-the-heart-lie]

ASL brothers HAIKYUU!! AU!!!!!

Day one of Self Indulgent month for me! I love these three, i love haikyuu, i love killer whales!

(The Naval Academy is this au’s version of marines)

For those who dont know, in Haikyuu (and prob in real life too but in my experience its not as important as they make it in the anime) The "Ace" of the team is the person who primarily scores points via spiking. Theyre the Hard Hitter, basically.

Design talk👇

Originally, i was gonna make their school mascot just "The Pirates" but i couldnt figure out a clever pun with the school name so i scrapped it in favor of an animal mascot. I figured I would have a wider range of puns that way.

I landed on Orcas as the mascot because I think they really embody a pirate way of life. Theyre strong, hang out in groups of a mix of found family and their actual family, hate the rich, and theyre fun loving! And also im a bit biased because theyre my favorite animal, but hey, i said its self indulgent month, didnt I?

Their school name is a play on the word for Killer Whale (Shachi シャチ) and the word for 'knowledge' (Chishiki 知識), i just smashed the two words together. I'm very proud of myself for coming up with that given i dont speak japanese at all.

Anyway, with their designs, I was taking inspiration from orcas to match the design themes of haikyuu. Ace's hair is bleached on the underside to look like the underside of an orca's body, I made ace and sabo's eyes look more whale-like, the clip in sabo's hair is meant to resemble to spots behind orca's eyes, and I tried to make luffy's hair look more like it's round and spiking down more than i usually do.

Ace is wearing a ''way of the ace" shirt in the first picture, Luffy is wearing a shirt that just says "VOLLEY BALL" because i think it would be funny if he wore a bunch of those Zero-context-poorly-translated-random-english-words shirts that theres a bunch of in Asia. Sabo dyes his hair like delinquents do, but it doesnt much look delinquent~y because of how soft it looks. He means to do it to make him look like a delinquent though. Sabo still has his scars in this au, but he uses his hair, arm braces, and leg braces to cover them up. LUFFY AND ACE HAVE FUNKY SOCKS BECAUSE NO ONE CAN TELL THEM (or me) THEY CANT. Sabo wears athletic socks though because he's a debbie downer. He defends himself saying “It’s practical” and Ace and luffy call him “practically a Debbie Downer.”

Luffy is very good at receiving from growing up with Sabo and Ace practicing setting and spiking with eachother and assigning Luffy as Ball Boy. So he got the libero position from that cuz sabo and ace put in a good word for him. Nepotism.

I didn't feel like coming up with designs for them, but Zoro and Bepo are also on their team (theyre in the fifth image sitting on the right of the line of students). Koala and nami are student managers, Robin is the teacher manager, and Franky is the coach. all other straw hats/luffy friends, rev army comrades, and whitebeard brethren are in the stands. Im trying to keep the ages consistent with how they are in canon.

I didnt do a very in depth research, but i couldnt find what Japanese schools have as mascot costumes. and given no one wears any costumes in haikyuu for their team, i can kind of assume they dont use them over there. But unfortunately for them, I'm American. And part of the backbone of our schooling system, is Vaguely Unsettling Mascot Costumes. My sister says my design for it looks like its from Club Penguin, and i find that delightful. [moment of silence for my billions of fallen Puffles, taken from me in The Shutdown] Anyway.

I thought I was clever coming up with the equivalent of the Marines in this au being a Naval Academy. And their mascot being Seals, famously the animal that gets the absolute Worst Of It from orcas. Get shit onnnnn

I believe thats about it, thanks for coming to my ted talk :)

[celtrist]

Next thing you'll say is he doesn't have a tail

ref to this pic

EDIT: Just to keep things clear I didn't really think about bringing it up but not everyone's gonna click to see the first picture and might be confused. Alastor was stated to know only a little bit of broken French, the reasoning due to being from New Orleans. Speaking standard French is very much not a thing in New Orleans, so he would logically only know French-Creole. This is very different from the standard French language and a large misconception that people from New Orleans speak regular French. So yes, he does speak some French, just not as well as people make him nor would it, in theory, be the regular French that everyone makes him speak [but I wouldn't put it past the writers to not do that research but maybe I have too little faith in them]. I'm not from New Orleans, I visited it once so it's not like I'm an expert. But I HAVE looked into it and just bothering with one Google search will tell you it's not common and you'll even have a special term called "Louisiana French" pop up. With that all said, these were statements made on years past streams and could've been changed in the official series. However, as of right now, the official statement is that he speaks only a little broken French that should technically be French-Creole if they're going by and that he's from New Orleans to know that language. And again, I don't have a lot of faith in writers to do the research into it being Louisiana French rather than regular French, but now I'm rambling lol This is just a bit of context for this comic so people who were curious can understand it a bit more. And it's totally possible I got something wrong, so feel free to point it out when I do. I just like to dig into the nooks and crannies of information for things :3 2nd EDIT: Just for any future reblogs, I did get somethings incorrect in the above (not surprising), so here's some of the corrections I got:

@mangotangerine: "A tiny nitpick - it would likely be Louisiana Creole, which is one of the French-based Creole languages (Haitian Creole is prob the most well known as it has about 10-12 million speakers vs Louisiana Creole which has around 10,000 due to multiple factors but especially legislation in early 1920s outlawing it). Louisiana French is an umbrella term for the various French dialects/etc in the region (e.g., the dialect Cajun French)." (We actually had a whole conversation in the comments of this post and highly suggest looking down there in case you're interested in learning more!)

@alyssumflowers: "I am from New Orleans and a little bit of a language nerd. You're confusing some things here. Cajun French is a dialect of French. My great grandmother spoke it fluently, my grandfather in pieces.

Louisiana Creole is another language entirely. The word "creole" means mixed and a creole language is basically a mixture of two or more languages. Sort of, it's a linguistics thing. Anyways. Louisiana Creole has next to no speakers left and I've had a hard time trying to find somewhere or someone to learn it from because I really want to." (Always great to hear from someone who has more insider knowledge on the subject! So I wanted to give this it's share due as well, hope you can fine somewhere to learn it! /ᐠ > ˕ <マ ₊˚⊹♡ )

Thank you for the comments! My previous statement still stands about Al probably not speaking normal French, but I wanted these corrections still known and pointed out :3

[lolastrniolo]

JUST FRIENDS - M.S.

summary: matt has had a crush on you for a long time, and has been having a hard time keeping it in his pants.

contains: smut, oral (f/m!receiving), fingering, mommy kink, virgin!bsf!matt, sub!matt, soft!dom!reader, innocence corruption

wc: 2.6k

a/n: first language is not english. also: my first fic ever, don’t expect too much. <3

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

you quietly walk into the kitchen, matt is sat at the dinner table with his back turned to you. “hi there”. he jumps a bit at your words and quickly shuts off his phone, a guilty expression on his face. “oh, hi. I uh… didn’t know you were here.”

“nick didn’t tell you? I slept in his room last night.” you say as you sit down in the chair next to him, pulling your knees up to your chest. “so, you gonna tell me what you were watching?” a smirk playing at your lips as you point at his phone.

ever since you became friends with the triplets, matt has had a crush on you. he thinks you don’t notice, but you do. you notice every quick glance he gives you, every time he adjusts his pants when you touch him, every time he licks his lips when you walk into the room. you can’t lie, you always thought he was the hottest out of the three brothers. you liked his innocence, his shy demeanor, and his slightly awkward persona.

“nothing. just, you know. checking the socials…” he replies, obviously blushing. now, he wasn’t exactly lying, he was checking the socials. yours, to be specific. he had been looking at his favorite picture of you, the only bikini picture on your profile. it had been in his saved collection ever since you posted it, he had touched himself countless of times while looking at the photo, imagining how it would feel to have your pretty tits pressed against his face.

his heart rate quickens, unable to take his eyes off of the tight pajama top you were currently wearing. he loved the way your nipples poked through, making him shift in his seat. of course you weren’t wearing a bra, you just got out of bed.

“so, how’ve you been? we haven’t talked in a while.” your voice sends shivers down his spine, and he’s having a hard time focusing on the conversation. “i-i’m good, you know… just the usual. you?” he asks, an awkward smile on his face. “yeah, i’m fine…” a deep sigh leaving your lips, ‘just been a bit, uh… how do i say this?’ you let out an awkward laugh, looking down at your lap and fiddling with the hem of your pajama shorts. “frustrated…” you continue, hoping he picks up on what you’re trying to say.

his eyes flick down to your lips briefly before snapping back to your eyes. “frustrated, how?” he asks, his brows furrowed, genuinely curious. of course he didn’t understand, his innocence getting the best of him. “well, you know… sexually.” you finally look back up at him, his face gets more red and his eyes widen. “oh…” his throat goes dry, his pulse quickening at your admission. his mind races as he thinks of all the ways to relieve your stress, the bulge in his pants slowly growing. ”sorry, I didn't mean to make things awkward” you say, a soft smile on your lips.

he shifts in his seat, trying to maintain his composure. his voice cracks slightly as he speaks, his eyes darting to your chest once again before looking back up to meet your eyes. “no, no, it’s fine…” his hands tremble slightly as he runs them through his hair. “It's just… you’re making it really hard for me to…” he trails off, an awkward chuckle leaving his lips. he swallows hard as he looks down at his lap, his erection becoming more and more obvious. “fuck…”

“what is it? are you okay?” you gently put your hand on his leg, matt immediately jumps at your touch. your eyes shift down to his laps and your eyes widen, realizing his problem. you quickly take your hand away, “shit, sorry… did i- did i do that?” he shoots up from his seat, his hands trembling as he adjusts his painfully hard cock in his pants. “it’s not your fault, i just… fuck, i can’t sit down right now.” he paces back and forth, his right hand running through his hair, the other on his hip.

“can I like… help you out?” you ask him. he didn’t expect your bold question, his jaw clenches as he tries to maintain control. “you don’t need to… I mean, you shouldn’t. but fuck, I really want you to…” he can’t take his eyes off your lips anymore, desperately wanting to kiss you.

you stand up from your chair, getting closer to him. you rest your right hand on his chest, the other coming down to grab his hand. you feel him shiver under your touch, his eyes focused solely on your lips. “only if you want to though…” his words come out in a whisper, his chest rising and falling with every breath he takes. “i do want to, you know how i know?” there’s a teasing tone to your words, matt has a confused look on his face as he shakes his head. you slowly guide his hand down to your heat, letting his fingers run over your wet panties, shorts to the side. “feel that? that’s how i know i want to.” your lips are next to his ear, whispering.

his eyes roll back as he feels your warmth through your panties. he let’s out a choked moan, his free hand reaching out to grab your waist. “shit, you’re soaked… but we can’t. we’re friends, right? friends don’t…’’ he presses his face into your neck, breathing in your scent. “right… but friends don’t get this wet for each other, hm?” you reach out and pam him over his sweats, to which he responds with a whimper. “just let me help you out, matt.”

his mind goes blank, his body taking over. he pulls his head back from your neck and crashes his lips onto yours, hands now gripping at your waist. you moan into the kiss, your own hands tugging at the hair on the back of his neck. “touch me, please…” he pants, his eyes filled with lust, hips grinding against yours. “shhh, sit down for me.” you whisper against his lips before gently pushing him down on the chair, hands on his shoulders. his eyes are locked onto yours, completely mesmerized by your beauty.

you kneel down in front of him, keeping eye contact as you do so. you slowly start taking off his sweats, on which a wet patch had formed. you let them pool at his ankles before teasingly tucking your fingers into the waistband of his boxers. “please, i can’t…” he throws his head back, desperate for some sort of relief. you let out a light chuckle, totally loving the desperation in his voice. you slowly start pulling his boxers down, until they meet his sweatpants on the floor. his cock is rock hard, begging to be touched.

you slowly wrap your fingers around his cock, his hips immediately bucking up into your hand as he lets out a choked moan. “a-ah!” he can’t help but let his fingers get tangled in your hair. you slowly start pumping his length, rubbing your thumb over his swollen tip, which was leaking with pre-cum. strings of moans and whimpers leave his lips, his hair now stuck to his sweaty forehead.

“please, just…” he begs, brows furrowed. “tell me, matt. what do you want?” you know exactly what he wants, to be fairly honest, you just want to hear the words leave is pretty lips. “it’s embarrassing..” he can’t even look you in the eyes, your hand still slowly pumping his length. “gonna need words, baby” he groans at the nickname, “just… use your… your m-mouth”

“good boy.” you finally lower your head and wrap your lips around his head, gently sucking on it. he lets out loud moans, not even trying to keep it in. luckily, chris and nick had some meeting today, so matt knew there was no reason to be quiet, and you definitely weren’t planning on shutting him up.

his grip on your hair tightens, gently pushing your head down. “is that okay?” he asks, careful not to hurt you. you moan around his dick as a response, and he hesitatingly starts fucking your throat. when he notices how well you take it, he gets a bit more rough, bucking his hips up into your face until your nose touches his pelvis. his head is thrown back, completely overwhelmed by the pleasure he’s experiencing.

“fuck, fuck, fuck…” he pants, “i’m gonna-” he doesn’t get to finish his sentence, thick ropes of white cum shoot into the back of your throat as he comes undone. he watches you as you swallow every last drop, his jaw practically on the floor. he had imagined a scenario like this thousands of times - getting sucked off by a woman - but never could he have guessed it would feel this good. “that was… wow”

“quick?” you chuckle at him a little before straddling his lap, kissing him deeply and letting him taste his own release on your tongue. you grind against him, trying to relieve some tension. “i need you, matt…” you whisper against his lips. “you need it now?” he asks, hands resting on your hips. “fuck, yes.” you moan. he quickly grabs your legs and lifts you up on the kitchen table. “you’re perfect.” he says, his voice hoarse as he spreads your legs slightly.

“matt” you moan, hands flying to the back of his neck as you crash your lips onto his again. his hands grip at your waist as he moans into the kiss, hips grinding into you. you break the kiss to start leaving trails of kisses down his neck, lightly sucking here and there. soft whines and moans leave his lips as you kiss him, his grip on your waist tightening.

you pull back to look him in the eyes, he has a desperate look on his face, eyebrows furrowed, eyes hanging low. he hooks his fingers into your shorts and panties, “please? can i?” he asks. you know matt is a virgin and has absolutely no clue what he’s doing, but honestly, the thought might be turning you on even more. “yes, matt, fuck…” you connect your lips to his again as he starts slowly taking off your shorts and panties, finally letting them drop to the floor. he disconnect his lips from yours as his eyes travel down your body, finally stopping at your dripping pussy. “you’re so pretty…” he can’t believe his eyes, he’s never had a woman like this in front of him. and it’s not just any woman, it’s you. the girl he’s had a crush on for years.

his left hand comes up to your chest, gently massaging. the other hand traces your wet slit, he then starts slowly tracing circles on your clit. “mph, fuck!” you arch your back into him, throwing your head back. matt slides his middle finger into you with ease, thanks to how wet he made you. a loud moan escapes your lips as he curls his finger inside you. matt’s eyes are focused on the way his finger glides in and out of your entrance, like he’s making sure he’s doing it right.

he adds another finger, “is this okay?” he asks, eyes drifting back up to your face. “yes, don’t stop… feels so- ah! feels so good…” your right hand is on his shoulder, your left hand propped behind you on the table to hold yourself up. “get on your knees for me, okay baby?” matt doesn’t need to be told twice, immediately dropping to his knees in front of you, his face now aligned with your heat. he looks up at you with lust-filled eyes, his fingers still buried deep inside you. “use your mouth baby, can you do that for me?”

“mmm” he starts slowly lapping at your clit, you can feel he’s not confident with his moves, but as soon as your hand flies to his hair and your moans get louder, his confidence increases, and so does the speed of his tongue and fingers. “like this?” his eyes are fixed on your face, studying your expressions as he sucks on your clit.

“fuck! yes, keep doing that… feels so good- don’t stop” you grind your hips into his face as you moan his name over and over, “matt, matt, matt…” every time you tighten your grip on his hair, his moans grow louder. his arms are wrapped around your thighs as he tries to pulls you even closer, desperate to make you cum. he lets out soft moans and whimpers as he works on your pussy, you can tell he loves giving just as much as you love receiving. “shit, matt… i’m so close- don’t fucking stop.”

matt doubles his efforts when he feels you clench around him, his fingers going even faster and his lips sucking even harder on your clit. he’s surprisingly good at this, considering he’s a virgin, you think to yourself. he moans loudly, the vibrations pushing you closer to the edge. “please, wanna make you finish…” he whispers in-between moans.

his words finally send you over the edge, strings of moans leaving your lips as you release all over his face and fingers. but matt doesn’t back away, in fact, he buries his face even deeper between your thighs. he continues to finger-fuck you, his moans muffled against your folds. “again…” he pants, his fingers pumping faster. “wanna make you cum again…”

“fuck, matt… good boy…” he lets out a loud whimper at the pet name. “can i…” he starts, “can i call you mommy?” you see his face heat up with embarrassment as he continues lapping at your folds, fingers still working inside you. you nod your head frantically, there’s nothing you loved more than a guy calling you mommy. especially because most men just wanted to be dominant in bed, so when a pretty boy like matt wanted to call you mommy, you couldn’t be more excited.

“mommy, please…” he pants in between licks, desperate to make you finish on his tongue again. “holy shit, don’t- don’t stop… doing so good for me.” matt loved being praised, loved hearing how good he made you feel. your eyes are locked on his, watching his pretty face between your legs as he does his absolute best to get you to the edge again. “i’m so close, shit!” matt picks up his pace and lets out a loud moan, never taking his eyes off yours.

you reach your high for the second time that day, your grip on his hair now painfully tight. matt smiles at you as you come down from your high, standing up on his feet again. “was that okay?” he innocently asks you, before sucking all of your juices off his fingers while looking directly into your eyes. you swear that sight alone could have made you cum a third time. you don’t respond to his question, you just kiss him deeply, tasting your own juices on his tongue. you both moan into the kiss before pulling back to look at each other, panting heavily, shocked from what just happened. “more than okay” you reassure him, “no guy has ever made me cum twice in a row like that”

he looks at you with a shy smile, his hands resting on your thighs. “i really liked that”, he confesses, a light chuckle leaving his lips as he drops his head on your shoulder. “me too, baby” you say as you let your hands roam through his hair.

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

hope this was kinda okay, not sure i’ll ever do this again 🤷🏻‍♀️ lmk if y’all want a part 2 and i might consider

update: tysm for all the likes & reposts, didn’t expect this to do well at all 🤭

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