witchygagirlwrites

[witchygagirlwrites]

Singles You Up

Vibe for this one shot came from the song "Singles you up" by Jordan Davis

You knew most of intelligence from when you started at the twenty first as a patrolmen. You had grew up with Adam and was close with Kim and Kevin from working the streets together. Instead of working towards intelligence like they did homicide managed to scoop you up. Of course that just made Voights life easier. He trusted you so when he was forced to share a case with homicide you were the detective he always requested to be detailed.

--------------------

Kevin loved any time he got to work with you. Hell the two of you were good friends. Not to mention you were beautiful, had an wonderful sense of humor, was one of the best cops he knew and was basically just an all around amazing woman. When Erin left for New York he was pleased to see you a week later standing at the front desk talking to Trudy when he came in for work.

The smile you had grew when you saw him "Kev! Guess what? We're now partners" he was a bit confused at first until Trudy clarified "She's taking Erin's place on the team and Voight figured you'd be a good fit for her partner"

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The longer Kevin worked side by side with you the deeper the feelings he'd had for you since you were both in uniform started to get. Every time he thought you couldn't surprise him you'd pop up with something that knocked him for a loop.

On his birthday he found a cupcake on his desk with a note from you saying "Another year older and even better looking. Best partner in the world!"

In the middle of a firefight he loved the fact that your ferocity and protectiveness over civilians and your team alike matched even Voights.

Good or bad you were a force of nature and he was swept along for the ride.

--------------------

He fucking hated your boyfriend. No it wasn't jealousy. If David treated you like he should and fucking appreciated you like you deserved it would be one thing but dammit the guy didn't pay enough attention to you to actually know you.

There was the time all of you was at Molly's and Kevin had went to grab him, Adam and Kim a drink around the same time David was ordering for himself and you. When he ordered white wine Kevin chuckled and cut his eyes at Stella "Make that wine a whiskey neat on the rocks" then patted David on the shoulder "I know my partner's drink" then walked away carrying the beers he'd ordered.

The next time was a community cookout. Your favorite song came on and while you and him both were singing along word for word David didn't know any of it. Hell you played the song nearly daily on the job. How didn't he know it?

It wasn't just not knowing your favorite things. David didn't check on you after hard cases. He didn't acknowledge your hard work after closing cases. He thought it was stupid that you loved thunderstorms and fuzzy blankets. He called your coffee habit disgusting because you didn't like creamer. He had the nerve to say you weren't feminine or soft enough.

In short he didn't deserve you.

---------------------

Luckily it'd been a few weeks since he'd seen David around so he hadn't been forced to deal with him. Unfortunately it seemed you'd ditched the team because he was sitting at the bar talking to Stella and Kelly while you were nowhere to be seen.

"Man if he's ever dumb enough to let her go I'd be at the front of the line to call him an idiot and try my shot" Stella arched an eyebrow "Oh really? Why is that?"

Kevin felt a smile slip onto his face that always came along with thinking about you "That girl's something else. She's always been. When we were on patrol she'd be the first set of boots on the block to work the case and the last to leave. She'd work fundraisers and charities for poorer neighborhoods on her days off. She can make you smile on your worse days. Hell she can go from this gentle soft woman looking after a victim to a hellcat bringing down a perp. She's beautiful and just all around amazing"

"Well partner it sounds like you may have a thing for me" you spoke from behind him and he spun around to see you standing there with a grin and started to back peddle but you shook your head "No take backs Atwater. Besides I'm single now"

He barely registered Kelly and Stella moving away before he asked "Since when?" You took a step closer which put you standing between his legs where he sat on the stool. "Since about two months ago when I finally realized the right guy's been staring back at me daily" the smile that he had was worth everything when he asked "And who is that?"

You rolled your eyes then pulled him into a kiss which he gladly returned.

[witchygagirlwrites]

Thank you for reading!!

Second Chance

After a rough split is a second chance possible (tiny smidge of steamy)

You chanced a look at the clock and groaned when you saw it was a little before two. You’d been tossing and turning for hours chasing sleep that was sure to elude you yet another night. Antonio would be by in the morning with strong coffee in tow and no questions. Sometimes it benefited you with having your best friend’s brother as a partner. He’d learned not to ask once the date that was supposed to mark your wedding had passed.

Months had passed since you and Kelly split. It was hard to try to be civil with each other so on jobs where fifty one and intelligence ended up working together you’d navigate towards Casey and Gabby for any questions you needed answered and Antonio would talk to Kelly if need be.

If you were being honest with yourself you still loved him just as much as the day you’d thrown the ring at him and told him to get out of your apartment and your life. The two of you had gotten engaged before Shay died but her death combined with you burying a partner right before your transfer to intelligence had put too much of a strain on your relationship.

Both of you wrapped your pain around yourselves like armor refusing to let anyone in. You stopped talking, stopped touching and you ended up moving completely back into your place not leaving so much as a change of clothes at Kelly’s. The night that everything blew up was actually your anniversary. You’d gotten wrapped up in a case that had left bodies from Chicago to New York and ended up completely forgetting what the day was.

He showed up to the district to ask why you hadn’t answered any of his calls or texts but you hadn’t even checked your phone because for one your attention was on the case and for two he hadn’t been attentive in weeks you hadn’t thought some switch would flip to make him open back up to you. When you told him you weren’t talking about it at work he made plans to come by your place that night.

By the time you made it home you were exhausted and sore from catching a few rounds in the vest. Luckily it hadn’t went through and nothing was broke but it still hurt like hell. You had just collapsed onto the couch when Kelly used his spare key to let himself in.

You glanced up to see he looked as exhausted as you felt and started to suggest putting off talking until you both felt more like it but when he sat down on the couch next to you the dam of emotions you’d spent so long building up broke free and your mouth started moving of it’s own accord “Kelly I love you but I can’t keep doing this. We barely talk. When we do spend the night together it’s not like it used to be. I’m tired. I can only keep up one fight at a time and my job is hard enough without this resting on my head. I can’t go into a firefight and be thinking about our next argument. I want to be with you but we’ve got to meet each other halfway. I’m at fault too but something has got to change”

Kelly’s face had fallen into the hard mask like he wore before walking into a burning building. It was devoid of emotion so no one would know what was really going on in his head as he nodded and stood up “Good you saved me the words. This hasn’t worked for a while and I didn’t know how to say it” your heart had fallen to your feet. He wasn’t even willing to try to meet you halfway. He laid your key down on the coffee table and you stared at it for a few seconds feeling your tears dry on your cheeks as the warmth of anger started to sink into your veins.

You stood up and pulled the ring off your left hand “If this isn’t even worth trying to you. If years of our lives mean nothing take this damn ring and get the hell out my apartment and forget you ever knew me” you threw it at his face and spun around quickly crossing the floor and slamming the bedroom door behind you. You waited until you heard the front door slam before sliding down to the floor staring at your bed where so many nights you’d spent in Kelly’s arms.

——————–

The next time you’d seen Kelly had been weeks later one friday night at Molly’s. You were sitting with Antonio, Sylvie and Gabby when he walked in with Matt. You knew from the glare Gabby shot Matt he hadn’t told her Kelly would be there.

You turned your attention to Sylvie silently begging her to keep the conversation flowing so she started talking about a call her and Gabby had went on a few days before. You could feel Kelly’s eyes on you when he walked up with Matt so you raised your eyes slowly and weren’t surprised to see him staring at you “Hey Kelly” you said quietly and he nodded “Y/N. You look good”

You half smiled feelings tears start to form in your eyes and blinked a few times while you stared at your drink to clear them away. Here he was within arm’s reach and didn’t even seemed effected by you at least not the way you were by him. You half listened to the conversation around you, trying to think of a graceful way to run out of Molly’s and away from your ex fiance before Antonio looked between you and Sylvie “Well ladies how about I drive you both home?” You shot him a small grateful smile “Thanks Toni” you kissed Gabby on the cheek then followed Sylvie out trying to ignore the way Kelly’s eyes tracked your movement.

You were silent in Antonio’s back seat the whole way to your apartment until Sylvie turned halfway around to look at you “Are you going to be ok? I can stay if you want?” “Me too partner you know I’ve got your back” Antonio added but you shook your head “No I’m ok. I’ve got to get used to seeing him. Fire and PD works too close and we run in the same circles. I can handle it”

——————-

You were pulled out your thoughts by the phone on your nightstand dinging with a message. Who the hell was texting you at this time of night?

You reached out for it expecting it to be an alert from possibly Hank or Antonio telling you a case had come up but your heart nearly stopped when you recognized the number even if you’d deleted it out your phone to avoid the temptation of texting it once alcohol hit your system. You clicked the alert and closed your eyes against the flood of emotion after you read those three simple words “I miss you”

You took a deep breath and opened your eyes hitting the call button above his text. You had to know if he was sober, if he meant it because it was the only thought that ever rang through your head at since the last night you’d spent with him.Thoughts of that night filled your head as the phone rang.

——————–

Intelligence had been after an arsonist who only sat fires to habited buildings. There was two bodies on the ground and numerous injured with the chances of that number growing higher the long he was on the street. You and Antonio had responded to a call from one of his c.i.s and found the guy. Unfortunately he’d already lit up the building. Antonio managed to get the kill shot on him but the two of you were stuck in a building that was basically a tinder box. There was no way out.

The two of you tried to pick your way out the building but a beam fell blocking your path. You knew Hank would get there and call CFD but the question was if they could make it in enough time. You and Antonio stayed crouched low holding jacket over your faces and trying to stay calm to control your breathing enough that smoke inhalation would at least be delayed.

When your chest started getting tight and breathing was a labor you reached out and grabbed Antonio’s hand. Something to try to anchor yourself. Just when you were praying that if this was the end that you’d die before the flames reached you a loud crack was heard just to your left and you heard Kelly “FIRE DEPARTMENT CALL OUT" 

Next thing you knew Gabby was telling you to breath and you were laying on a stretcher. You pushed yourself up to a sitting position and saw Antonio sitting next to you with an oxygen mask on as well. "What the hell happened?” You asked pushing yours off despite Gabby’s objections.

“Well my best friend and my brother nearly died in a fucking fire for one!” When you saw the horror of what could have happened pass over her face you leaned back and let her put the mask back on and heard Antonio mumble “Good girl”

To appease Hank and Chief Boden you went along with the run to med. Luckily it didn’t take long to determine that while you both would be sore for a few days and have a lingering cough you were free to go home.

After Gabby dropped you off at the precinct to pick up your car you weren’t sure what came over you. Matt, Otis, Herrman, Cruz hell damn near all of fifty one had ended up checking on you except for Kelly. Maybe it was the left over adrenaline from the brush with death or maybe it was so much that hadn’t been said that lead you to drive to his apartment instead of your own.

You parked next to his mustang and made your way up to his place. It wasn’t until you were knocking that you thought about what you would actually say when he opened the door.

When he opened the door the look of relief in his eyes at seeing you stirred a completely different emotion in you. You launched yourself into his arms and crashed your lips against his in a hungry kiss that held everything you couldn’t put into words. You’d nearly died and you were pissed he hadn’t come to check on you yet being in his arms just felt right.

He pulled back after a moment clearly struggling as he met your eyes “Y/N seeing you like that” you could see the unshed tears in his eyes as he trailed off so you quieted him with another kiss “Kelly I don’t want to talk” he nodded and pulled you back to him as he backed into the apartment and shut the door behind the two of you.

Once the door was shut your back was pressed up against it with Kelly’s lips leaving a trail of open mouth kisses down your neck “Baby I..” He tried but you shook your head and pulled back far enough to pull your shirt over your head then reach for his own “No talking” you repeated before his hands went down to your lower back and he picked you up into his arms leaving you no option but to wrap your legs around his waist.

You moaned loudly when his lips found the spot on your neck he knew made you weak and he gave a sharp thrust of his hips letting you feel the way his body still reacted to yours. “Bed now” you managed to get out between gasps as his lips moved lower to nip gently at your breasts through the thin material of your bra.

He turned to head towards his bedroom never letting his lips leave your skin. When he dropped you onto the bed you met his eyes as he glanced down at your jeans asking for consent. You didn’t break eye contact as you pulled your bra off then unbuckled your jeans and started to wiggle them off your hips smiling when he reached to help you pull them off.

“Well Severide gonna do something or stare at me?” You taunted remembering the words from the very first time the two of you had slept together. The smile he gave you said he remembered as well. “Oh I’m gonna do a lot more than stare” he said before dipping his head down to your thighs leaving kisses along the left one trailing up just short of where you needed him before doing the same to the right. “Kelly please” you finally begged and that was all it took as he finally connected his mouth to your core licking a solid line up it and groaned against you when you moaned his name.

He slid one finger in curling it up inside of you barely brushing that certain spot he knew would make you come undone before sliding a second one in while his tongue worked against your swollen clit savoring every whimper and sigh he managed to pull out of you. “Kelly” you moaned tugging on his hair pleading for him to show attention to that one spot and he more than willingly obliged pumping his fingers inside of you in faster every movement hitting that spot that made you see stars. “Oh god yes. Right there Kel. Please don’t stop” you begged as he moved back up to catch your lips with his letting you taste yourself on him,fingers never slowing as he fucked into you feeling you get closer. When you finally came hips bucking up off the bed with the force of your orgasm he finally slowed his motions easing you through the high.

You reached for his shoulders and pulled him back fully on top of you and nearly growled “get your jeans off and get inside me” “I thought you said no talking” he threw back at you before pushing his jeans off to the floor and climbing back up your body leaving a trail of kisses from your hip all the way up to your collarbone finally ended with a teasingly slow kiss to your lips. Your nails dug into his shoulders as you asked “Condom?” And he was already reaching for a box out the night stand.

“Are you sure?” He asked once he was lined up with your entrance so you hooked your leg around his hip pulling him down to you and felt him chuckle as he slowly slid into you giving you time to adjust to him. Once he was bottomed out you reached up to give him an open mouthed kiss rolling your tongue against his when he finally started to move. He pulled almost all the way out before slamming back into you.

“Fuck baby. You feel so amazing. I missed this” he groaned as he fucked into you. Your nails dug into his back as you felt your second orgasm approaching “Kelly…Oh my god yes” you moaned out before the pleasure washed you under a loud moan of his name falling from your lips as you came and felt his thrusts go erratic before he gave a final hard thrust followed by small twitches of his body as he came while moaning your name.

After a second he pulled out of you and smiled when you whined lightly “Sorry baby” he apologized and left a gentle kiss on your lips before stepping out the bed to dispose of the condom. When he came back he pulled you to his chest and you let him. The familiarity of the action was too strong to ignore.

You fell asleep in that position and woke up a few hours later with his chest pressed firmly against your back. All the insecurities started raining down on you at once. He hadn’t wanted to fight for your relationship. He hadn’t come to the hospital to check on you and when you’d seen him out he hadn’t seemed that effected by the split..not to mention he still had condoms in his side table?

You managed to slip out the bed without waking him and quickly slipped your clothes on not even bothering to put your shoes on until you were in the elevator heading down out his apartment.

The next morning you’d had coffee with Gabby and told her what happened then begged for help on running interference until you could be sure you wouldn’t fall back into Kelly’s bed. You had to protect your heart from him even if it meant breaking it yourself.

——————-

Since that night you’d avoided him. He’d called and texted. Hell he even called Antonio but after Antonio told him you were ok just needed space he’d back off so why was he texting you at two in the morning?

When he finally answered the first words out his mouth were “I’m sober” as if he could read your mind. “Then why aren’t you asleep at two in the morning Kel?” You asked with a humorless laugh because why weren’t you asleep at two in the morning?

“I was thinking about the first halloween we were together. We went to that costume party then you and Shay piled up in her room to watch horror movies. I found the two of you at like four in the morning wrapped around each other because you’d managed to freak yourselves out and didn’t want to wake me and admit it” Shay had teased Kelly for a week that a few more horror movie marathons and she could steal you away.

“Yea she told everyone at fifty one she’d made me scream louder than you but it was because she’d insisted on that Austrian movie which was the scariest shit I’ve ever seen” you said with a laugh and you could almost see the smile on his face when he sighed and said “God I’ve missed hearing your laugh”

“Kelly. Why did you really call?” You asked not wanting to snap at him but not having it in you to keep up casual conversation with a man who owned so much of your heart to this day. “I finally got Gabby to tell me why you left the morning after that fire and haven’t talked to me since” he admitted and you covered your eyes with your hand trying to stow off the embarrassment you felt.

“I know it was just sex to you Kelly…” You were cut off at that point by him calling your name almost harshly. You were stunned for a moment before he repeated gently this time “Y/N baby please just listen to what I have to say then if you want to never speak to me again so be it” you nodded then realized he couldn’t see you so you said “Go ahead”

“So much has gone wrong between us. Shay and Michelson dying so close together. Both of us refusing to break, to let each other in. If I could go back and change it I would. She’d kick my ass if she knew I let you slip through my fingers. That day when we busted that wall down and found you and Antonio… I couldn’t think straight. I got into a fight with Matt and Boden sent me home. I had tried for hours to think of what to say to you so I could call then you ended up at my door.”

He hesitated for a moment and you weren’t sure if you should say anything so you remained quiet until he continued “There has never been a single time between us that was just sex. I love you Y/N. I still want to somehow get back to the point of being able to spend the rest of my life with you. That night I honestly thought either it would be a chance for us to start over but then I woke up and you were gone. I begged Gabby and Antonio both to tell me what I’d done but the Dawsons are both firmly in your corner but tonight I guessed Gabby just finally lit that fuse of hers and decided to tear into me”

This time you finally spoke to ask “What do you mean?” Thinking over what all you’d said to Gabby since that night. He chuckled before saying “oh like how the break up didn’t effect me. How I would look at you like we’d never been in love. How I didn’t come to the hospital when you were being checked out. How there was still condoms in my nightstand so I had to be sleeping around" 

"Oh” you breathed and heard him scoff “Yea oh. Y/N honestly all my cards on the table because I don’t have a damn thing left to lose. Every time I saw you and weren’t able to touch you or kiss you was like a knife to the gut. When I’d see you working a scene and you’d head straight for anyone who wasn’t me..baby you could’ve shot me and it would have hurt less. I had to force myself to be cold to keep from breaking down. While we’re on the subject those condoms are the last box I bought when we were together. Where you scribbled only for Y/N and Kelly’s use is still on the box. I haven’t so much as looked at another woman and I’d give anything to get a second chance at us”

Your head was spinning as you tried to process what all he’d just said. You vaguely registered him calling your name more than once before you finally said “I’m here” he made a noise in response then said “I’ll let you go” “No Kel wait” you said hurriedly and heard him make a questioning noise so you decided to lay your cards on the table as well “I still love you too Kelly. I don’t want anyone else. It will take time but I want to try us again too. Can you come over? I just want you to hold me then come morning we can talk more” you could hear the smile in his voice when he said “give me ten minutes top and I’ll be at your door”

[witchygagirlwrites]

Second Chance

After a rough split is a second chance possible (tiny smidge of steamy)

You chanced a look at the clock and groaned when you saw it was a little before two. You’d been tossing and turning for hours chasing sleep that was sure to elude you yet another night. Antonio would be by in the morning with strong coffee in tow and no questions. Sometimes it benefited you with having your best friend’s brother as a partner. He’d learned not to ask once the date that was supposed to mark your wedding had passed.

Months had passed since you and Kelly split. It was hard to try to be civil with each other so on jobs where fifty one and intelligence ended up working together you’d navigate towards Casey and Gabby for any questions you needed answered and Antonio would talk to Kelly if need be.

If you were being honest with yourself you still loved him just as much as the day you’d thrown the ring at him and told him to get out of your apartment and your life. The two of you had gotten engaged before Shay died but her death combined with you burying a partner right before your transfer to intelligence had put too much of a strain on your relationship.

Both of you wrapped your pain around yourselves like armor refusing to let anyone in. You stopped talking, stopped touching and you ended up moving completely back into your place not leaving so much as a change of clothes at Kelly’s. The night that everything blew up was actually your anniversary. You’d gotten wrapped up in a case that had left bodies from Chicago to New York and ended up completely forgetting what the day was.

He showed up to the district to ask why you hadn’t answered any of his calls or texts but you hadn’t even checked your phone because for one your attention was on the case and for two he hadn’t been attentive in weeks you hadn’t thought some switch would flip to make him open back up to you. When you told him you weren’t talking about it at work he made plans to come by your place that night.

By the time you made it home you were exhausted and sore from catching a few rounds in the vest. Luckily it hadn’t went through and nothing was broke but it still hurt like hell. You had just collapsed onto the couch when Kelly used his spare key to let himself in.

You glanced up to see he looked as exhausted as you felt and started to suggest putting off talking until you both felt more like it but when he sat down on the couch next to you the dam of emotions you’d spent so long building up broke free and your mouth started moving of it’s own accord “Kelly I love you but I can’t keep doing this. We barely talk. When we do spend the night together it’s not like it used to be. I’m tired. I can only keep up one fight at a time and my job is hard enough without this resting on my head. I can’t go into a firefight and be thinking about our next argument. I want to be with you but we’ve got to meet each other halfway. I’m at fault too but something has got to change”

Kelly’s face had fallen into the hard mask like he wore before walking into a burning building. It was devoid of emotion so no one would know what was really going on in his head as he nodded and stood up “Good you saved me the words. This hasn’t worked for a while and I didn’t know how to say it” your heart had fallen to your feet. He wasn’t even willing to try to meet you halfway. He laid your key down on the coffee table and you stared at it for a few seconds feeling your tears dry on your cheeks as the warmth of anger started to sink into your veins.

You stood up and pulled the ring off your left hand “If this isn’t even worth trying to you. If years of our lives mean nothing take this damn ring and get the hell out my apartment and forget you ever knew me” you threw it at his face and spun around quickly crossing the floor and slamming the bedroom door behind you. You waited until you heard the front door slam before sliding down to the floor staring at your bed where so many nights you’d spent in Kelly’s arms.

——————–

The next time you’d seen Kelly had been weeks later one friday night at Molly’s. You were sitting with Antonio, Sylvie and Gabby when he walked in with Matt. You knew from the glare Gabby shot Matt he hadn’t told her Kelly would be there.

You turned your attention to Sylvie silently begging her to keep the conversation flowing so she started talking about a call her and Gabby had went on a few days before. You could feel Kelly’s eyes on you when he walked up with Matt so you raised your eyes slowly and weren’t surprised to see him staring at you “Hey Kelly” you said quietly and he nodded “Y/N. You look good”

You half smiled feelings tears start to form in your eyes and blinked a few times while you stared at your drink to clear them away. Here he was within arm’s reach and didn’t even seemed effected by you at least not the way you were by him. You half listened to the conversation around you, trying to think of a graceful way to run out of Molly’s and away from your ex fiance before Antonio looked between you and Sylvie “Well ladies how about I drive you both home?” You shot him a small grateful smile “Thanks Toni” you kissed Gabby on the cheek then followed Sylvie out trying to ignore the way Kelly’s eyes tracked your movement.

You were silent in Antonio’s back seat the whole way to your apartment until Sylvie turned halfway around to look at you “Are you going to be ok? I can stay if you want?” “Me too partner you know I’ve got your back” Antonio added but you shook your head “No I’m ok. I’ve got to get used to seeing him. Fire and PD works too close and we run in the same circles. I can handle it”

——————-

You were pulled out your thoughts by the phone on your nightstand dinging with a message. Who the hell was texting you at this time of night?

You reached out for it expecting it to be an alert from possibly Hank or Antonio telling you a case had come up but your heart nearly stopped when you recognized the number even if you’d deleted it out your phone to avoid the temptation of texting it once alcohol hit your system. You clicked the alert and closed your eyes against the flood of emotion after you read those three simple words “I miss you”

You took a deep breath and opened your eyes hitting the call button above his text. You had to know if he was sober, if he meant it because it was the only thought that ever rang through your head at since the last night you’d spent with him.Thoughts of that night filled your head as the phone rang.

——————–

Intelligence had been after an arsonist who only sat fires to habited buildings. There was two bodies on the ground and numerous injured with the chances of that number growing higher the long he was on the street. You and Antonio had responded to a call from one of his c.i.s and found the guy. Unfortunately he’d already lit up the building. Antonio managed to get the kill shot on him but the two of you were stuck in a building that was basically a tinder box. There was no way out.

The two of you tried to pick your way out the building but a beam fell blocking your path. You knew Hank would get there and call CFD but the question was if they could make it in enough time. You and Antonio stayed crouched low holding jacket over your faces and trying to stay calm to control your breathing enough that smoke inhalation would at least be delayed.

When your chest started getting tight and breathing was a labor you reached out and grabbed Antonio’s hand. Something to try to anchor yourself. Just when you were praying that if this was the end that you’d die before the flames reached you a loud crack was heard just to your left and you heard Kelly “FIRE DEPARTMENT CALL OUT" 

Next thing you knew Gabby was telling you to breath and you were laying on a stretcher. You pushed yourself up to a sitting position and saw Antonio sitting next to you with an oxygen mask on as well. "What the hell happened?” You asked pushing yours off despite Gabby’s objections.

“Well my best friend and my brother nearly died in a fucking fire for one!” When you saw the horror of what could have happened pass over her face you leaned back and let her put the mask back on and heard Antonio mumble “Good girl”

To appease Hank and Chief Boden you went along with the run to med. Luckily it didn’t take long to determine that while you both would be sore for a few days and have a lingering cough you were free to go home.

After Gabby dropped you off at the precinct to pick up your car you weren’t sure what came over you. Matt, Otis, Herrman, Cruz hell damn near all of fifty one had ended up checking on you except for Kelly. Maybe it was the left over adrenaline from the brush with death or maybe it was so much that hadn’t been said that lead you to drive to his apartment instead of your own.

You parked next to his mustang and made your way up to his place. It wasn’t until you were knocking that you thought about what you would actually say when he opened the door.

When he opened the door the look of relief in his eyes at seeing you stirred a completely different emotion in you. You launched yourself into his arms and crashed your lips against his in a hungry kiss that held everything you couldn’t put into words. You’d nearly died and you were pissed he hadn’t come to check on you yet being in his arms just felt right.

He pulled back after a moment clearly struggling as he met your eyes “Y/N seeing you like that” you could see the unshed tears in his eyes as he trailed off so you quieted him with another kiss “Kelly I don’t want to talk” he nodded and pulled you back to him as he backed into the apartment and shut the door behind the two of you.

Once the door was shut your back was pressed up against it with Kelly’s lips leaving a trail of open mouth kisses down your neck “Baby I..” He tried but you shook your head and pulled back far enough to pull your shirt over your head then reach for his own “No talking” you repeated before his hands went down to your lower back and he picked you up into his arms leaving you no option but to wrap your legs around his waist.

You moaned loudly when his lips found the spot on your neck he knew made you weak and he gave a sharp thrust of his hips letting you feel the way his body still reacted to yours. “Bed now” you managed to get out between gasps as his lips moved lower to nip gently at your breasts through the thin material of your bra.

He turned to head towards his bedroom never letting his lips leave your skin. When he dropped you onto the bed you met his eyes as he glanced down at your jeans asking for consent. You didn’t break eye contact as you pulled your bra off then unbuckled your jeans and started to wiggle them off your hips smiling when he reached to help you pull them off.

“Well Severide gonna do something or stare at me?” You taunted remembering the words from the very first time the two of you had slept together. The smile he gave you said he remembered as well. “Oh I’m gonna do a lot more than stare” he said before dipping his head down to your thighs leaving kisses along the left one trailing up just short of where you needed him before doing the same to the right. “Kelly please” you finally begged and that was all it took as he finally connected his mouth to your core licking a solid line up it and groaned against you when you moaned his name.

He slid one finger in curling it up inside of you barely brushing that certain spot he knew would make you come undone before sliding a second one in while his tongue worked against your swollen clit savoring every whimper and sigh he managed to pull out of you. “Kelly” you moaned tugging on his hair pleading for him to show attention to that one spot and he more than willingly obliged pumping his fingers inside of you in faster every movement hitting that spot that made you see stars. “Oh god yes. Right there Kel. Please don’t stop” you begged as he moved back up to catch your lips with his letting you taste yourself on him,fingers never slowing as he fucked into you feeling you get closer. When you finally came hips bucking up off the bed with the force of your orgasm he finally slowed his motions easing you through the high.

You reached for his shoulders and pulled him back fully on top of you and nearly growled “get your jeans off and get inside me” “I thought you said no talking” he threw back at you before pushing his jeans off to the floor and climbing back up your body leaving a trail of kisses from your hip all the way up to your collarbone finally ended with a teasingly slow kiss to your lips. Your nails dug into his shoulders as you asked “Condom?” And he was already reaching for a box out the night stand.

“Are you sure?” He asked once he was lined up with your entrance so you hooked your leg around his hip pulling him down to you and felt him chuckle as he slowly slid into you giving you time to adjust to him. Once he was bottomed out you reached up to give him an open mouthed kiss rolling your tongue against his when he finally started to move. He pulled almost all the way out before slamming back into you.

“Fuck baby. You feel so amazing. I missed this” he groaned as he fucked into you. Your nails dug into his back as you felt your second orgasm approaching “Kelly…Oh my god yes” you moaned out before the pleasure washed you under a loud moan of his name falling from your lips as you came and felt his thrusts go erratic before he gave a final hard thrust followed by small twitches of his body as he came while moaning your name.

After a second he pulled out of you and smiled when you whined lightly “Sorry baby” he apologized and left a gentle kiss on your lips before stepping out the bed to dispose of the condom. When he came back he pulled you to his chest and you let him. The familiarity of the action was too strong to ignore.

You fell asleep in that position and woke up a few hours later with his chest pressed firmly against your back. All the insecurities started raining down on you at once. He hadn’t wanted to fight for your relationship. He hadn’t come to the hospital to check on you and when you’d seen him out he hadn’t seemed that effected by the split..not to mention he still had condoms in his side table?

You managed to slip out the bed without waking him and quickly slipped your clothes on not even bothering to put your shoes on until you were in the elevator heading down out his apartment.

The next morning you’d had coffee with Gabby and told her what happened then begged for help on running interference until you could be sure you wouldn’t fall back into Kelly’s bed. You had to protect your heart from him even if it meant breaking it yourself.

——————-

Since that night you’d avoided him. He’d called and texted. Hell he even called Antonio but after Antonio told him you were ok just needed space he’d back off so why was he texting you at two in the morning?

When he finally answered the first words out his mouth were “I’m sober” as if he could read your mind. “Then why aren’t you asleep at two in the morning Kel?” You asked with a humorless laugh because why weren’t you asleep at two in the morning?

“I was thinking about the first halloween we were together. We went to that costume party then you and Shay piled up in her room to watch horror movies. I found the two of you at like four in the morning wrapped around each other because you’d managed to freak yourselves out and didn’t want to wake me and admit it” Shay had teased Kelly for a week that a few more horror movie marathons and she could steal you away.

“Yea she told everyone at fifty one she’d made me scream louder than you but it was because she’d insisted on that Austrian movie which was the scariest shit I’ve ever seen” you said with a laugh and you could almost see the smile on his face when he sighed and said “God I’ve missed hearing your laugh”

“Kelly. Why did you really call?” You asked not wanting to snap at him but not having it in you to keep up casual conversation with a man who owned so much of your heart to this day. “I finally got Gabby to tell me why you left the morning after that fire and haven’t talked to me since” he admitted and you covered your eyes with your hand trying to stow off the embarrassment you felt.

“I know it was just sex to you Kelly…” You were cut off at that point by him calling your name almost harshly. You were stunned for a moment before he repeated gently this time “Y/N baby please just listen to what I have to say then if you want to never speak to me again so be it” you nodded then realized he couldn’t see you so you said “Go ahead”

“So much has gone wrong between us. Shay and Michelson dying so close together. Both of us refusing to break, to let each other in. If I could go back and change it I would. She’d kick my ass if she knew I let you slip through my fingers. That day when we busted that wall down and found you and Antonio… I couldn’t think straight. I got into a fight with Matt and Boden sent me home. I had tried for hours to think of what to say to you so I could call then you ended up at my door.”

He hesitated for a moment and you weren’t sure if you should say anything so you remained quiet until he continued “There has never been a single time between us that was just sex. I love you Y/N. I still want to somehow get back to the point of being able to spend the rest of my life with you. That night I honestly thought either it would be a chance for us to start over but then I woke up and you were gone. I begged Gabby and Antonio both to tell me what I’d done but the Dawsons are both firmly in your corner but tonight I guessed Gabby just finally lit that fuse of hers and decided to tear into me”

This time you finally spoke to ask “What do you mean?” Thinking over what all you’d said to Gabby since that night. He chuckled before saying “oh like how the break up didn’t effect me. How I would look at you like we’d never been in love. How I didn’t come to the hospital when you were being checked out. How there was still condoms in my nightstand so I had to be sleeping around" 

"Oh” you breathed and heard him scoff “Yea oh. Y/N honestly all my cards on the table because I don’t have a damn thing left to lose. Every time I saw you and weren’t able to touch you or kiss you was like a knife to the gut. When I’d see you working a scene and you’d head straight for anyone who wasn’t me..baby you could’ve shot me and it would have hurt less. I had to force myself to be cold to keep from breaking down. While we’re on the subject those condoms are the last box I bought when we were together. Where you scribbled only for Y/N and Kelly’s use is still on the box. I haven’t so much as looked at another woman and I’d give anything to get a second chance at us”

Your head was spinning as you tried to process what all he’d just said. You vaguely registered him calling your name more than once before you finally said “I’m here” he made a noise in response then said “I’ll let you go” “No Kel wait” you said hurriedly and heard him make a questioning noise so you decided to lay your cards on the table as well “I still love you too Kelly. I don’t want anyone else. It will take time but I want to try us again too. Can you come over? I just want you to hold me then come morning we can talk more” you could hear the smile in his voice when he said “give me ten minutes top and I’ll be at your door”

[witchygagirlwrites]

Carry Me

You and Kevin finally admit your feelings

"Take a picture it’ll last longer” Kim whispering in your ear nearly made you jump out your seat as you looked back at her “I have no idea what you’re talking about” She raised an eyebrow and glanced across the room to where your attention had just been. Kevin was standing talking to Hank and it was clear your attention was not on your sergeant.

“You like Kev! I don’t know why you don’t just ask him out. I mean it’s not the stone ages, we women can make the first move” she whispered and you shook your head looking around to be sure no one had heard her. “He’s my co worker Kim. I think if anymore of his team hook up Voight may just have a coronary. Besides I doubt he’d feel the same and a little crush isn’t worth messing up a friendship over” you chanced another look at Kevin and he just happened to look up at that moment and winked at you before returning to his conversation with Hank. Damn he looked good in that blue henley.

—-

Focusing back on work was easy when the unti caught a case involving what appeared to be a gang shooting on the south side.

You were helping do a canvas to try to find any witnesses when you spotted the new patrolman Jessica talking to Kevin and felt a twinge of what could only be described as jealousy when she touched his arm and smiled at something he’d said clearly flirting.

Despite your best efforts to not let it bother you it seemed like your mouth had a brain of it’s own when you blurted out “Officer aren’t you supposed to be helping the canvas? Not pawing one of the intelligence unit?” Her eyes widened as she turned to look at you and stammered “y-yes detective” and turned to catch up with her partner who was already halfway down the block. “Real professional Atwater” you grumbled with a shake of your head glad for a distraction when you heard Hank’s voice calling all of you over.

—-

The unit headed back to the precinct to start working any different angle to find out just what had went down. You luckily were able to avoid Kevin by Hank sending you with Antonio to talk to your joint C.I.s

“Hey you and Kev ok?” He asked on the way back to the precinct and you cut your eyes at him “We’re fine. Why?” He shrugged “Don’t know usually there’s alot more joking going on between the two of you”

“we’re currently working a case Toni. Wouldn’t be too professional would it?” You asked and he again shrugged “Don’t shoot the messenger sweetheart. Just checking to be sure”

—-

A break came in the form of one of your informants calling to say he knew who was taking credit for the shooting and after running down the name it turned out this wasn’t a gang shooting at all but more of a revenge thing considering the shooter had been convicted of a crime six years before hand on which the victim had been a silent informant.

—-

You were all down in roll up getting ready to head out. Kevin looked over when you slipped your vest on but before he could offer to help adjust the straps Adam got through helping Kim and moved to do yours at her request.

He didn’t know why you were so mad at him but it bothered him to some degree not being the one to adjust your vest. He’d been helping you with it since he came up to intelligence and it felt wrong not doing it.

—-

“Oh son of a bitch” you groaned between gritted teeth, your left ankle feeling like it was on fire every time you tried to put the least amount of weight on it.

When all of you had showed up to the address a fire fight had ensued and you’d ended up chasing the suspect three blocks before you tackled him. It quickly turned into a fight before backup could get there and somehow in the mix you’d wound up twisting your ankle in the struggle.

When Adam and Jay saw you standing favoring that side well let’s just say the suspect went in with a few extra bumps.

Hank found you leaning heavily against his suv and looked down at your leg “Go to med” “Boss I’m fine” you argued but one look at his face you knew it wasn’t a request.

You tried to walk back to Antonio’s car but your ankle gave way, before you could hit the ground you felt someone scoop you up in their arms and was surprised to see it was Kevin. A part of you felt embarrassed to be carried after such a trivial injury, the other part fought the urge to lean into his touch. “Put me down” you growled pulling a laugh from him “when you get to the car I’ll put you down”

—-

Antonio ended up riding back with Hank so that left Kevin to take you to med. The two of you sat in silence waiting for Ethan to come back with the results of your xray.

“Are you still mad at me?” He asked glancing up from his phone. You shook your head “Never was” “uh huh” he huffed but thankfully Ethan chose that moment to come in to inform you it was just a bad sprain. “Keep off it, take your anti inflammatory and you shouldn’t be benched but about a week”

“Thanks Doc” you said after he had the ankle wrapped and held out crutches to you. He smiled and said “You’re welcome. It’s a nice change to treat you when a bullet hole isn’t part of the problem”

—-

Kevin helped you get into the car then put your crutches in the backseat. “Sarge said to take you home. Kim is gonna bring your car after shift” he spoke quietly and you nodded not looking at him.

When he pulled into your driveway he turned the car off and sat for a minute before looking at you “Jessica was flirting with me but I told her that I had eyes for someone else before you ever came over there” “and you’re telling me this why?” You asked.

He rolled his eyes and let his head fall back against the rest “Damn girl are you blind? You’re the someone I got eyes for. I’ve been trying to work up the nerve to ask you out but weren’t sure how you felt until you been bugging all day over her. So at the risk of being a damn fool when you’re healed up you wanna go out to dinner with me?”

You were a bit stunned at his confession but couldn’t help teasing him just a little “On one condition” he raised an eyebrow before asking what that condition was. “Carry me in?” You asked with a smirk. He laughed, a relieved look creeping onto his face “I think I can manage that”

[witchygagirlwrites]

Jealous

Kevin starts to get jealous of your bond with Adam

When your phone vibrated on the nightstand you let out a groan pulling the blanket up over your head. “Babe you gonna get that?” Kevin asked voice full of sleep from behind you. “No” you practically growled turning over to bury your face in his bare chest in hopes of getting more sleep.

He chuckled looking down to see you were already back asleep and leaned over to grab your phone just in case it was Voight but saw it was a text from Adam. He didn’t want to pry into your phone because your business was your own he trusted you, especially with the boys from the unit so he went to lay it back but it buzzed with another text so he clicked on it and saw it read “Can you meet me for breakfast?”

Now that perked his interest just for the simple fact he knew Adam had taken you for lunch twice this week already. He knew the two of you were close but given the fact that you’d eaten lunch less with him this week and that Adam’s relationship with Kim was currently on the rocks it caused a twinge of jealousy to nip at the back of his mind but you nudging closer to him even in your sleep made those feelings quickly diminish. He laid your phone down and glanced at the clock seeing there was still another half hour before the alarm would go off so he laid his head back down next to yours.

—-

When the alarm did go off you let out a whine when Kevin pulled out of your grip which of course caused a laugh from him. “Come on beautiful. We gotta get up” you opened one eye and watched him walking into the closet and let out a low whistle. “Looking good there Atwater” you could hear his laugh as you finally drug yourself up out the bed.

When he came back out with clothes in hand you were sitting on the side of the bed in your jeans and bra with a shirt in your hand as you texted on your phone.

“Something wrong?” He asked laying his clothes down so he could start getting dressed. You shook your head and laid your phone down so you could finish getting ready “Naw that text was from Ruzek asking if I could meet him for breakfast but considering I wanted to sleep later I asked if he wanted to talk at lunch time”

“Again?” Kevin mumbled under his breath. “What you say baby?” You asked with a smile and he shook his head “nothing just Adam needs to leave some of your time for the rest of us”

His smile made it seem more joking so you laughed and pressed a quick kiss to his lips “Don’t worry baby I still have plenty of time for you”

—-

The first half of the day everything was business as usual. Voight sent you with Erin to talk to a few of your c.i.’s so that meant you were out the office most of the morning.

When the two of you made it back to the precinct you headed straight into Voights office to relay what information you’d gathered.

—-

A tip came in a little before noon that the dealer the unit was after was making a move. “Suit up and lets roll out” Voight barked heading down to roll up.

Kevin was helping Jay double check weapons and when he looked up saw Adam adjusting your vest and felt that same twinge of jealousy nip at him. It shouldn’t matter. Everyone double checked everyone’s vest but for some reason seeing Adam so comfortable touching you was bothering him and he didn’t know why.

Adam was his friend. One of his best friends and he trusted him with his life but over the last two weeks you’d been spending alot of your free time with Adam and that made his mind go places he didn’t want it to.

“Kev you good man?” Mouse asked bringing him back to reality as he handed him a comm. “Yea man I’m good”

—-

The takedown went smoothly enough. Only a few shots were fired and all of the unit made it out unscathed.

Once the interrogations were done, charges pressed and reports filed everyone was glad to call it a day.

—-

Kevin watched you as you walked over to Adam’s desk and sat on the edge of it to talk to him and once again felt that nip but Jay called his name and that pulled his attention.

He looked up in enough time to see you hugging Adam with a smile on your face and had to stop himself from throwing a punch.

—-

You walked back over to Kevin not noticing the annoyed look he was struggling so hard to swallow down.  He didn’t want to think that about you or Adam but body language was throwing him off seriously.

“You ready to go baby?” You asked sitting in his lap despite the wolf whistle from Erin. “You ain’t got nothing else to do?” He asked cutting his eyes at Adam who was wishing everyone a good night before heading to the stairs. “Nope I’m all yours” you answered and could’ve sworn you heard him say something along the lines of it being about time but you brushed it off and stood grabbing his hand before telling everyone goodnight.

—-

On the drive home Kevin’s anger at the possibility of something going on between you and Adam gave way to a sense of insecurity. Adam made you smile in the way that the corners of your eyes crinkled up, even on your worse days he’d say something stupid and pull a laugh of out you.

Maybe he hadn’t been paying enough attention to you? Maybe he had slipped in some way to lead you to find what you weren’t getting from him in Adam?

He knew you and Adam were close friends before he ever asked you out but damn Adam had been the one that helped to push the two of you together. Why would he want to come between what he’d helped to create?

—-

By the time you pulled up to his place you’d called Kevin’s name three times without him answering “huh?” He finally said and you shook your head “I said are you still flying out to see the kids next month?”

He half smiled “Yea. Why?” “I wanted to come with you. I miss them too and I’ve got a few vacation days they’re gonna make me take soon anyways”

“Yea that sounds good to me” he said with a smile.

The two of you headed for the door and you wondered where his mind seemed to be. All day he’d been a bit out of it expect when the unit was busting up those dealers. You were starting to worry about him.

—-

He was being paranoid. That had to be it. After all you were with him because you wanted to be and hell Adam never beat around the bush when it came to flirting.

He followed you up to the door and was about to follow you in when your phone started ringing. You glanced down and smiled “Give me one sec baby. That’s Ruzek” the smile that had worked onto his face dropped when you stepped back out onto the porch to finish the call.

—-

After hanging up with Adam you walked inside to find Kevin sitting on the edge of the couch drinking a beer “did you get me one?” You asked to get his attention but when he looked up you saw the distraught look on his face and his brother and sister were the first thing that popped into your head.

You dropped the teasing and rushed to him “Baby are the kids ok?”

“They’re fine” those two words calmed your heart from beating out your chest but you were still worried as to why your boyfriend looked so miserable.

“Then what’s wrong?” You asked sitting next to him and placing one hand on his leg. He looked down at your hand before covering it with his own “Can I ask you something and you tell me the truth?”

“Of course” you answered not taking your eyes off his. “Is there something going on between you and Adam?”

—-

You snatched your hand away from him like it was burnt “excuse me?”

He shrugged as if he hadn’t just accused you of cheating on him with a mutual good friend of both of yours.

“You and him have gotten awful close since him and Kim have hit their rocky patch”

You couldn’t believe your ears. You stood up and stared at him. “You know what maybe I’ll just go stay at my place tonight”

—-

Before you got to the door you felt Kevin’s hands on your waist “Baby wait”

You snatched away from him and spun around to face him. When he saw the tears in your eyes he knew he was wrong “If you want to know Kevin. I’ve been helping him get Kim back!”

“What?” He questioned taking a step back. You dug your phone out your jacket and pulled it up to the photos Adam had sent you of him, Kim, Her mom and his dad at a justice of the peace “They got married after work in a small ceremony”

—-

He flipped through the photos and felt a joy for both his friends but then the sinking guilt hit him.

“Sweetheart. I am so sorry” he tried to pull you into a hug but you snatched away “no Kev you don’t just say I’m sorry. First of all Adam is your boy. He loves you man. He’d never come at me like that. And even if Adam wasn’t who he is I am in love with you. That means I don’t want anyone else”

He froze when the words left your mouth “you love me?”

“Yes I love you!” You answered and a smile quickly spread across his face as he pulled you into his arms. “I’m sorry I ever thought that baby. I love you too and I’ve known how I feel for a while but didn’t know how to tell you then the thought of losing you was driving me crazy”

You pulled back from the hug long enough to lean up on your tip toes and press a kiss to his lips “I’ll forgive you this time”

A giggle escaped your lips when he lifted you up off the floor hands securely under your thighs as you wrapped your legs around his waist “what you mean this time? Baby girl there won’t ever be another time. I can promise you that”

[witchygagirlwrites]

Best Friend (Part 3/3)

you and Kevin are best friends but when you start to fall for him you start pulling away until a life threatening situation urges you to confess how you feel

Kevin was sitting in the corner of the waiting room at Med. It had taken too long for Gabby and Sylvie to get you back. Minutes passed precious minutes that could mean the difference in whether or not you woke up.

The ride to med was the longest one he'd ever experienced. He couldn't ride in the ambulance because he'd been too upset Adam had basically drug him into a car. Otis had climbed in the back of the ambulance with Gabby to help bag you while she worked on stabilizing your injuries. Time you got to Med Will and Connor along with an army of nurses met you in the ambulance bay.

He'd stood outside trauma one watching as Will ventilated you. Your heart was beating but your lungs couldn't breathe on their own yet. You had inhaled too much smoke. He'd stood frozen to the spot until Kim and Adam had talked him into going to the waiting room which was packed with family members of the victims of the fire but one corner of the room was nothing but fire and cpd waiting to hear anything on you.

-----

Gabby and Sylvie both sat leaned against Antonio who was going from silently praying to trying to keep everyone calm.

Adam and Jay had both tried to talk to Kevin but after he snapped at Kim everyone had given him a wide berth knowing if he had acted that way towards her any of the men may have to duck a punch.

-----

Your words kept playing through his head "I love you Kev. You need to know that"

Why hadn't he realized it before then? Why hadn't he told you how he felt? Hell Vinessa and Jordan had called him out more than once but he always thought you just saw him as a friend nothing more and he didn't want to risk your friendship on feelings you may not reciprocate now he may never have the chance to tell you how he felt.

-----

The pregnant woman Jessica was going to be ok. She was far enough along her OB had decided inducing labor would be safer than waiting to check the baby's lung capacity.

She'd given birth to a seven pound, two ounce little girl about half an hour before.  Mom and baby were both going to be ok thanks to you.

They'd given the baby your name as her middle name citing that she wouldn't have been born had it not been for you. Jessica told her husband and Sylvie how you had given her the mask and the fire blanket then never left her side and how you had shielded her with your own body when the roof collapsed.

From what Casey and Severide said you had effectively sheilded her. They'd found the two of you under a portion of roof but Jessica hadn't been injured beyond her leg that she told them was broken before the roof came in.  She'd been sending her husband down to the emergency department as she could to try to find out any news on you but after the third trip Will had told him someone would come up because it was only causing more stress on Jessica and the people who loved you.

-----

He was proud of you even if what you did was the stupidest thing he'd ever seen. The paramedics had been told time and again after Shay died not to go in a building. He knew you though once you found out there was someone inside and heard that person hell itself wouldn't have kept you out. Your bravery was one of the many reasons he loved you.

Hell he could start now and that baby would be going into kindergarten by the time he got through listing all the reasons he loved you.

He leaned his head back and closed his eyes willing for all of this to be a bad dream and him to wake up and be able to start this day over.

A phone ringing pulled everyone's attention to the bag sitting at Sylvie's feet. Your bag. She cut her eyes at Gabby who nodded so she leaned over and unzipped the bag to find your phone sitting on top. when she pulled it out she showed the phone to Antonio who cursed under his breath before taking it and standing up.

Kevin hadn't moved when the phone rang because honestly he hadn't cared. If it was anything to do with you Will would have came out to tell them but when Antonio bumped his foot he glanced up and saw your phone was being held out to him and his heart stopped seeing Vinessa's name and a picture of you and her flash across the screen.

He took the phone from Antonio and took a breath before answering "Hey Vinessa" "Kev?"

He steadied himself for the next part of this conversation "Where's auntie?" "Hold on I'll go get her. Is everything ok?" "Just go get her" he answered being more snappy than he usually would be with his sister but not wanting to have to tell her what was going on with you not yet.

-----

He told his aunt what had happened and the shape you were currently in.  "She's strong Kevin. She'll pull through" she assured him but he couldn't shake the image of your body hanging limp in Kelly's arms. "I don't know what I'm gonna do if she don't" he admitted feeling like a portion of his heart was getting ripped out his chest at the prospect of you dying.

"Keep faith in her and the doctors. If she's half the woman you and these kids say she is she'll wake up"  he spotted Will walking towards him so told her he had to go. The last thing she told him was "I really want to meet her one day" then hung up.

-----

Everyone held their breath when they spotted Will. Sylvie and Kim stood to be next to Kevin as he heard whatever news was coming.

Will let out a breath and smiled slightly "She's got a concussion from the blow, fourteen staples in the back of her head and bruised ribs but all in all she was lucky considering. Now as far as the smoke inhalation goes we're slowly weaning her off the ventilator and so far she's doing good. If she continues at this pace she'll be backing breathing on her own before morning. She's medicated so she's resting but Kev she's going to recover" 

Kevin felt himself weaken at hearing you were going to be ok. He'd been preparing himself for the worse but now he knew you were coming back to him.

He pulled Kim then Sylvie into a hug. "She's going to be ok" Kim reminded with a smile.

-----

Will let everyone go to your room two at a time. Seeing you with a breathing tube in was hard but knowing you would recover lessened the blow.

Once everyone had saw you mainly to reassure themselves you were still intact they began to trickle out to head home and get some sleep so they could all come back in the morning before shifts started to check on you. Kevin however couldn't bring himself to leave so Will cleared it for him to stay overnight.

-----

He sat at your bed staring at your chest as it rose and fell. Your breathing was getting better. In the last few hours they had removed the breathing tube completely leaving you on just oxygen but you were still sleeping from the pain medication they'd given you.

Will had left orders with the night shift on keeping a check on you and that he would be in first thing to check your lung functions.

He was beyond tired. Sleep had been nipping at him since everyone left earlier but in his mind if he fell asleep something would happen to you and he couldn't chance it.

His aunt had called again for an update on you and was happy to hear they were confident in your recovery. He'd talked to Vinessa and Jordan and they were both worried about you and made him promise to call as soon as you were up to talking again.

He sat looking through the numerous photos of you and his siblings he had on his phone. He settled on one in particular that Vinessa had taken on her last birthday. You were smiling and hanging off his neck as you ducked a water balloon thrown by Kim and Adam.

Why hadn't he realized then he was in love with you? He finally drifted off to sleep with one hand touching your arm that was closest to him.

-----

Everything hurt as you swam out from under the fog of unconsciousness. The last thing you remembered was blocking Jessica from the piece of roof that was crashing down on the two of you.

You felt a weight on your left arm and slowly opened your eyes to see Kevin fast asleep with his head leaned over on your arm. He looked so peaceful you didn't want to move and risk waking him but you needed to see just how badly you were hurt not to mention you had to see how Jessica and her baby were.

Despite the pain you were feeling a touch of embarrassment hit when you remembered telling Kevin you loved him. Was that why he'd stayed? A sense of guilt? Or maybe he felt the same? That thought made a small smile slip onto your face but you pushed it down and looked around for the call button and hit it once hoping whoever came in would keep it down a bit until you at least found out what happened after you were knocked out.

------

Will's head popped around the corner and he gave you a small smile. You help one finger to your lips and he looked down and saw Kevin still asleep "How ya feeling wonder woman?" He whispered coming closer to listen to your breathing. "Not that wonderful" you croaked out grimacing at the sound of your own voice pushing the oxygen down once he gave the ok.

"So do you wanna know about yourself first or about Jessica and her little girl?"

-----

After showing you a couple pics on his phone of Jessica and your name sake Will gave you a rundown of your own injuries and you were honestly surprised you'd faired as well as you did.

"Has he been here all night?" You asked and felt Kevin stirring before he sat up rubbing his eyes "He's been here since they brought you in"

Will smiled and said "I'll give you two a few minutes. There's some tests we need to run on you but for now just rest. You need it" "Thanks Will" you replied with a tired smile. He winked at you before walking out "I'd say any time but I prefer not to see you again like this"

A silence fell between you and Kevin once Will walked out.  He spoke your name quietly bringing his eyes up to yours and you felt tears spring to your eyes “Just please be my best friend right now, not the guy I just confessed my love to.” you begged closing your eyes and leaning back against the pillows.

You couldn't face the pity you were sure was in his eyes. He was your friend of course he'd stayed to make sure you didn't die but now that he knew you were on the mend would come the talk that he didn't feel the same way.

He reached out and grabbed your hand running his thumb across the back of it. "Angel look at me please" you opened your eyes slowly and when he saw the tears brimming in them it hurt his heart. "Seeing Kelly carry you out that building felt like my whole world stopped. You weren't breathing, you were bleeding and they wouldn't let me get to you. It took me a while to realize it myself but I've been in love with you for almost as long as I've known you. You're my best friend and I don't want to ever have to doubt that you know how I feel about you again. So please baby don't think for a minute that I don't love you"

-----

You felt a smile spread across your face as Kevin's words tumbled out. When he got through he sat staring at you with an expectant look on his face as if he was scared that your confession had just been stimmed by the possibility of death.

"One request" you said turning your hand over to lace your fingers with his. A smile slipped onto his face staring at your hands before raising his eyes back to your face "Anything" he said squeezing your hand gently "are you willing to kiss me while I sound like a frog?"

He let out a shocked laugh and shrugged "Baby I'd kiss you even if you were a frog"

Kevin stood up and gently brushed his lips against yours in a tentative kiss. You raised your hand that didn't have an IV in it to pull him closer to you and deepen the kiss.

The sound of Will clearing his throat at the door made Kevin pull away from you with a smile. "I love you Kevin" you whispered pressing another quick kiss to his lips before he could pull away completely. "I love you too sweetheart" he said with a smile before stepping back so Will could get up to your side.

Will looked between the two of you and chuckled "I always thought you two would be good together"

[witchygagirlwrites]

Best Friend (Part 2/3)

you and Kevin are best friends but when you start to fall for him you start pulling away until a life threatening situation urges you to confess how you feel

An alarm ripped through the firehouse before you heard Casey's voice "STRUCTURAL FIRE AT AN APARTMENT BUILDING. MULTIPLE INJURIES. LETS MOVE PEOPLE"

You grabbed your jacket and ran behind Brett to your rig and just slammed the door shut as she pulled out onto the road.

-----

At the same time you were responding to the call the intelligence was getting a notification saying it fit the m.o. of the arsonist they'd been after for the last two weeks.

"Now remember this isn't officially our scene until they have it cleared but let's roll out alot of these sickos like sticking around to watch their handy work we may hit it lucky and catch this asshole" Hank barked out as everyone grabbed their jackets and headed for the stairs.

-----

You were working through the triage area another Gabby had set up upon arriving to the scene.

So far the worse injury you'd seen was a broken femur. There was lots of cuts and luckily low degree burns but so far it was looking as if everyone had gotten out unscathed until a man around your age approached you.

He was wearing a ups uniform so it was clear he'd probably heard the news and headed straight here. You figured it would be a simple case of finding out the name of his loved ones and pointing him towards which tent.

-----

"Sir can I help you?" You asked and he nodded "My wife Jessica she's uh she's eight months pregnant. She was on bed rest where is she? We live in two fifteen"

You felt your heart skip a beat at his words. You had walked every inch of the traige area and hadn't seen a pregnant woman. "Sir can you just have a seat right here" you spoke keeping your voice calm from years of training it.

Her eyes widened as she shook her head "I'll go talk to him. You go tell Casey we've got someone still inside"

-----

You grabbed one of the bags out her rig that held a scba mask and fire blanket and threw it over your shoulder as you ran to where you'd last seen Matt.

You spotted Kelly first and hollered "SEVERIDE!"  He turned towards you so you told him "There's a woman eight months along inside. Apartment two fifteen" he nodded and headed back in calling across his radio.

You started back towards triage but heard a clanking noise like someone hitting on pipes and it occured to you these buildings had multiple emergency exits. She could be trapped and by the time you got one of the guys out to her it could be too late from smoke inhalation alone.

You pulled your radio from your side and tuned it to the channel they used to communicate inside "Um fellas I think i may have heard something near the north west corner"

A few moments passed and you heard the clanking again and no one had responded. Your only thought was a pregnant woman dying because you didn't do anything so without thinking of your own safety you headed in the direction of the noise carefully stepping over boards that had fallen from the fire burning two stories up.

"CALL OUT!" you hollered and heard a weak "I'm here!" and followed it. You pulled the scba mask out and put it over your face because the smoke was already to the point of making tears spring to your eyes.

-----

Meanwhile the scene two blocks from the fire was one of madness. Antonio had spotted the guy as soon as he parked his car and alerted the rest of the unit who eventually caught him after a foot chase.

Antonio, Hank and Al headed back to the station while everyone else continued to the fire to see if they could possibly help.

Time Kevin stepped out the car he spotted Brett and immediately looked for you as he walked towards her. When she looked up he smiled and pointed around "Where's my girl?"

Brett looked around then hollered at Gabby asking where you had ended up.

Gabby shrugged that she didn't know then spotted Casey walking out the building and asked him if he talked to you or if they'd found the pregnant woman. When the answer to both was a no the entire scene went into a panic.

-----

You carefully picked your way towards the sound of the plea for help and spotted legs pinned under a beam. You followed them and said a silent prayer at discovering her stomach was untouched.

You leaned down so she could see you and smiled "Jessica? Your husband is worried about you" she started crying at seeing she wasn't alone then started coughing. You immediately ripped the mask off yourself and helped her put it on then spread the fire blanket over her. "I'm gonna try to move these beams just stay still ok?" She nodded so you moved down to her legs where they were pinned.

You pulled the radio from your side and tried the line again "Fellas I'm in the north west corner near the rear emergency exit I've got a trapped female late twenties in her eight month. I need some help"

When no response came you groaned and slid it back on your side before deciding to try the beams.

You squatted down to get a good grip ignoring the burning starting in your lungs and how the heat was licking up your shoulders telling you the fire was getting close to where the two of you were.

You tried with everything you had but it only moved a couple inches no where near far enough to get her free.

You eased it back down and moved up to her side to access any other wounds. You asked questions around coughing and she nodded yes or no.

From what you could tell at least one of her legs were broken but the baby was moving at least.

There had been no noise from your radio so you tuned back to the line Gabby and Brett would hear and tried "Dawson, Brett. Get the boys. I'm trapped in the North West corner near the rear fire exit. I found the pregnant woman. Her legs are pinned and I'm guessing from the heat the fire is working towards us"

-----

Everyone went silent when Gabby yelled across "SHUT THE HELL UP!" and raised her radio so they could hear your voice. You were already gasping between each word from the smoke and warning the fire was headed your way which it was. She also knew you'd die before you left someone injured.

Kevin felt his heart drop hearing your voice. You tried to keep it strong but the way it broke at the end giving way to a cough felt like someone had punched him in the gut.

Casey started barking out orders to the men to keep the fire pushed back from where you were then hollered for Kelly "Severide! You're with me" Kelly ran to his side and he looked back at Gabby "Keep her talking. We'll get to her"

-----

You had laid the radio down next to Jessica's legs and tried again to free them but it was to avail. If no one came you would both die. The burning in your lungs was getting worse and breathing was more of a task but Jessica was pregnant. There was no way you were taking the mask from her.

You were struggling to get enough air in your lungs as the surrounding area got even thicker in smoke clouding everything but Jessica from your line of view.

Suddenly the radio crackled and of all people you heard Kevin's voice come through "Sweetheart hasn't Otis told you if you wanted to play fireman you needed more training?"

You cracked a small smile and got enough smokey air into your lungs to say "Well you know me always the impatient one"

A wave of nausea hit you along with what felt like the start of a migraine and you had treated  inhalation victims enough to know it was officially setting in.

"Well just slow down. Severide and Casey are coming to you. The rest of the crew is working to keep the fire back" you nodded knowing he couldn't see you and moved up to check on Jessica. She was alert and staying calm like you'd asked. When you asked how her breathing was she nodded and focused on the breaths like you told her.

"Kev the smoke is getting really bad" you admitted breaking a little when you started counting in your head the amount of minutes you'd been in here hoping you'd gotten that mask on Jessica before the smoke got too much on her and the baby and knowing if they didn't get here soon the smoke could kill before the fire had a chance.

The sound of what you knew was more portions of the building collapsing ran through the space and you worried what would happen if enough fell to block the two of you from rescue.

-----

Kevin held the radio to his forehead taking a few deep breaths before trying to talk again. Your voice was getting a hoarseness to it Gabby said wasn't good.

He knew you well enough to know you were scared. Whether for yourself, the pregnant woman in your care or both of you he wasn't sure but he knew if you were scared it was bad.

"Kevin can you keep her talking?" Gabby asked and he nodded she added "Ask her about the pregnant woman keep her mind on something else"

Before he could hit the button on the radio to talk to you again a loud crack was heard followed by Otis shouting about the fire trying to break through.

He shook his head to keep his attention fully on you instead of the insanity of the scene "Sweetheart Gabby said how's your patient doing?"

-----

You were barely holding onto consciousness at the moment when Kevin's voice cracked across the radio again. Him asking how Jessica was stirred you enough that you crawled from where you'd been squatting at her feet up to her face.

Soot was covering the mask so you wiped it off and saw her eyes were wide but she was doing the breaths you'd showed her "How ya doing?" You asked grimacing at your own voice. "I'm scared" she finally admitted.

You leaned down closer to her and whispered "I am too but we just gotta hold tight"

She nodded and laid a hand on her belly. You followed it with your eyes and saw what was probably a foot moving back and forth across her belly and smiled weakly.

You pulled the radio up to your mouth and hit the button "She's holding tight"

-----

Kevin smiled when he heard your voice again. It was the best sound in the world and he just had to keep you going just a little longer. Kelly and Casey had reported they were almost to you but portions of the roof had collapsed barring their way.

"How bout you? How you doing?" He asked into the radio praying to anything listening that the firemen would get through to you in time.

"Chest hurts like hell" you breathed and he cut his eyes at Brett who mouthed "Smoke inhalation" and felt his stomach flip.

"Well how about I talk and you can just listen and let me know you're there ok?" He offered and Brett nodded that it was ok to go that route.

-----

You were checking Jessica's pulse trying to make sure her heart was beating where it should. When you were sure it was you spoke into the radio "You always did like to talk Kev" and had to block your mouth in your arm to keep the cough from gagging you.

He hesitated and said "Well you can't run from me now how's about you tell me why you been avoiding me? Do my breath smell bad or something?"

You almost laughed "Naw Kev you smell fine. I might not right now"

You leaned over on the wall close to Jessica's head keeping a hand on her pulse at all times.  "Well baby why then I miss you this is the longest we've talked in a while"

"Hard to explain Kev" you answered and leaned your bed back listening for any clue the boys were getting closer to the two of you.

-----

"Three more minutes Kev. That's all we need" Gabby whispered in his ear and he nodded.

He stepped away from everyone else to clear his own head. He had to keep his attention solely on you and only you. "Try me. I'm understanding and I know when Kelly and Casey get to you. You're gonna come out in boss mode ready to handle any and all injured out here and won't have time to talk to me till later"

------

You looked down at Jessica who was fighting to keep her eyes opened and shook her gently. She was breathing for two and even with the mask the smoke was getting to be too much. She opened her eyes and looked up at you "Who's on the radio?" "My friend" you answered and she nodded "Sounds as worried as my husband would be"

You knew another few minutes you would lose consciousness then Jessica would be right after you. You'd been breathing pure smoke for too long and god help if you passed out then her body decided the trauma was too much and her water broke.

"Kev I care about you so much" by this point you'd basically pulled Jessica's head into your lap. "I care about you too sweetheart" he answered quickly and you started coughing again using your arm to block it from Jessica.

Your eyes were drawn up and what you saw made your eyes widen. There was a large section of the floor overhead barely holding on. If a good gust of wind whipped through it would fall directly on top of the two of you.

You handed Jessica the radio and pointed up "I gotta try to move you. At least a little so hold onto the radio ok?" She nodded so you squatted again trying to use the wall as momentum to get her moved and smiled when the beam shifted enough you were able to get her legs free this time.

She cried out in pain and you saw her leg was twisted at the opposite angle it should be. You pulled her back a few more inches and moved down to check her lower half.

As far as you could find there was no open wounds. You had her free but there was no way you could get her out. You were too weak.

"Kev tell em I got her free" you breathed across the radio half collapsing next to her as you tried to get a breath that didn't burn.

-----

"SHE GOT HER FREE" Kevin hollered across to Hermman who reiterated across the radio.

Kevin's desperation cut through the air bringing you back to the bit of consciousness you were clinging to. Jessica had turned her head to look at you but she couldn't get up because of her leg and you just felt too weak.

-----

"You're doing great baby. Kelly got one more wall to get through and they'll be at you. Talk to me" he tried and when you didn't respond he felt his knees weaken "COME ON SWEETHEART ANSWER ME!"

"I love you kev. You need to know that" you spoke weakly into the radio right before you spotted a chunk of roof coming down headed for Jessica and dove blocking her face and chest with your body and felt darkness wash over you.

Kevin was dumbfounded. You just told him you loved him but was it how he loved you? Was it how he felt like he wasn't himself when the two of you didn't talk, was it how when he was with you he felt. Was it how he was standing there feeling completely helpless watching this burning burn knowing you were trapped inside?

Before he could respond to you Hermman hollered "EMTS GET READY THEY'RE COMING OUT!"

------

Kevin saw Casey first carrying a body and it was apparent from the bump that was the pregnant woman you'd went in after.

A man wearing a ups uniform ran forward as she was being loaded onto a gurney "Is she ok?" The woman ripped the scba mask off and pulled her husband into a hug "She saved me"

The woman was quickly loaded into another ambo that peeled out for med but Gabby and Slyvie were waiting on you. Kelly walked out with you in his arms. "DAWSON, BRETT SHE'S HURT AND NOT BREATHING"

Once he was clear of the building he laid you down and started cpr while Slyvie and Gabby ran forward.

Kevin hadn't realized he was moving until he felt Jay and Adam both grab him. "stay back man let them work" Adam pleaded but he couldn't. You were laying bleeding from the back of your head and you weren't breathing. He loved you more than just about anything in this world and now he wouldn't have the chance to tell you.

Otis and Hermman both joined the efforts to try to hold Kevin back. His eyes were glued to your still form and he felt his knees buckle out from underneath him when he heard Gabby holler "WE'RE LOSING HER"

[witchygagirlwrites]

Best Friend (Part 1/3)

you and Kevin are best friends but when you start to fall for him you start pulling away until a life threatening situation urges you to confess how you feel

You first met Kevin when he and Kim were still patrolmen and you had just joined firehouse 51 as a paramedic. They were the officers on scene of a wreck you were working. When the ambulance rolled up and you jumped out after Brett you nodded at the both of them "You the officers that caught it?" Kim nodded "Yea the driver of car A is alert and talking the driver of car B is still breathing but not conscious Severide and Casey have been working to get the door open"

They stayed and helped what they could to clear the scene even giving the ambo an escort to med.

They introduced themselves properly and told you they worked out the 21st which meant all of you would be seeing each other around.

When your shift ended Gabby invited you to Molly's so you could meet her brother and the unit he worked with.

You followed her into the bar and smiled when you spotted Kim and Kevin "Burgess! Atwater!"

Gabby cut her eyes at you as you headed for the two "you know them?" You smiled back at her "met them earlier today actually but at least they're familiar faces. I'm gonna say hey then I'll find you to meet Antonio and his team"

-----

Within a few weeks you were adjusted to life in Chicago and had gained quite a few friends not only within the firehouse but in the 21st as well.

-----

Months later when Kevin was pulled up to intelligence he didn't just call he came to the firehouse and was waiting by your car when you came walking out. You smiled up at him "Sup Atwater?" He grinned "well I'm taking Vinessa and Jordan out to celebrate thought you might want to come"

"What are we celebrating?" You asked not paying much attention as you loaded your bag into your backseat then the thought hit you "You made intelligence!" He nodded and barely caught you as you jumped into a hug "I'm so proud of you!"

-----

Your friendship with Kevin was the easiest bond you'd ever formed. You were close with all of intelligence but he had become your best friend. He trusted you to be there should Vinessa and Jordan need someone when he or Kim couldn't get to them and you actually let him close enough to see the real you that usually ended up buried beneath the facade you put forth to make it seem like you were fearless on the job.

Your feelings for him started growing deeper the longer you knew him. When you would get the call of an officer being fired upon you would feel your stomach knot when you responded and despite the guilt feel a sense of relief at seeing it wasn't him or any of his team.

-----

You hadn't realized how much your feelings for Kevin had shifted until one night at Molly's. It was Otis's birthday so the place was more packed than usual.

You were standing with Erin, Kim and Gabby at the bar trying to order drinks when you spotted Kevin talking up Allison one of the nurses from med.

Your eyes were glued to the way she smiled at something he said and laid her hand on his arm.

He leaned in close and whispered something in her ear causing her to lean back and laugh which was an almost melodic sound and knew he would he hooked. How could he not be? She was beautiful. Her black dress hugged her curves perfectly, the short heels she wore only elongating her legs even further not that she needed the help.

You suddenly felt self conscious in your jeans and simple top with the same boots you wore on the job.

-----

Kim calling your name snapped you out your thoughts and when you shot her a small smile she followed your line of vision and threw her arm around your shoulder comfortingly "You know you could tell him. He wouldn't give her the time of day if he knew"

You shot her a questioning look and she shrugged "it isn't hard to see not for me anyways but if you insist on not telling him at least let me buy you a drink"

You smiled and glanced back at Kevin and Allison once more before nodding "jack on the rocks?" She nodded with a smile "jack on the rocks it is"

-----

You resigned yourself to pull away from Kevin some although you refused to pull away from the friends you'd made within the district which would prove to be a task but you were up to it to protect your own heart.

-----

Kevin started to realize you didn't come around as much. Vinessa would still text you and Jordan would drop by the firehouse when he needed help with science homework but if Kevin called or texted it would go unanswered.

You'd come to Molly's but if you didn't spot Erin or Kim you'd hang close to the firehouse group.

He knew you were pulling away but what he didn't know was why.

------

No matter how much you were trying to avoid Kevin when Jordan got caught up witnessing a shooting you automatically went to him and Vinessa pushing your own feelings aside to check on the two of them.

-----

When things escalated to point of Kevin feeling like they would be better and safer going to live with his aunt in Texas you met him at the airport

You had just parked when you saw Kevin pull up a few spaces down so you got out and walked to meet him. Vinessa got out the car and ran into your arms "I don't wanna go. I'm gonna miss you and Kim and my friends!"

You smiled at her and said "come on now baby girl you'll make new friends as for me and Kim you have our numbers, we'll FaceTime and after I clear it with your aunt I can always fly out to visit and I'm sure she'd love to come visit too" that seemed to help her feeling some. She smiled and hugged you once again before letting Jordan say his goodbyes "That FaceTime offer stand for me too when I need some science help?"

You laughed and said "even when you don't need science help. Unless I'm mid call I will always answer" he glanced back at Kevin before asking "what if you're on a date?" Kevin shook his head "She said she'll answer Jordan"

-----

You walked to the gate with them and watched while they boarded waving at them one last time before they disappeared onto the plane.

"If they call you first will you let me know they landed safe and your aunt got them please" you asked as you turned to leave but his hand flew out and caught your arm.

You stopped and stared at his hand for a second until he dropped it and gave you that smile you always loved "Or how about I get you a cup of coffee and we can hang out since it's been weeks since you talked to me without those two around and just because they're moving with my aunt don't mean I wanna lose my brother,sister and best friend in one day"

"I had to switch shifts with Gabby to be able to come see them off so I've got to get home, grab my bag and head for fifty one"  you replied taking a step back from him and plastering the closest to a genuine smile you could manage onto your face.

He nodded never letting his smile falter "well call me when you get off. Since you're working graveyard I can treat you to breakfast before I head in" you barely met his eyes to say "sounds like a plan" before turning to make your retreat already thinking up an excuse that would be a good enough reason to not call him.

-----

By the time you were getting off you just wanted to head home and crash. Vinessa had called you when they landed in Texas and introduced you to their aunt over FaceTime who was a sweet woman that welcomed you to come out whenever. Unfortunately the call had ended abruptly when an alarm ripped through the bunks alerting to a multiple car wreck so you had to tell Vinessa bye and head out.

-----

You headed out to your car and groaned when you checked your phone and saw there was several texts from Kevin. The last one was a reminder to call him when you got off.

You couldn't face him this early while you were this tired especially without a buffer of some sort so you sent him a text back telling how crazy the shift had been and requesting a raincheck for a later day.

He was of course more than understanding agreeing to the raincheck and telling you to get some rest. You couldn't help but smile so you sent back to tell him to have a good shift before slipping your phone in your pocket and climbing into your car.

-----

Another week passed and every time Kevin tried to call or text you the answer would be something vague about being tired from work or already having plans.

Vinessa and Jordan were starting to settle at his aunts and according to the two of them they both talked to you every other day at least.

He finally took enough of wondering what he'd done to make you purposely avoid him and cornered Kim in the break room at work. "Burgess we need to talk" he walked in behind her and she nodded letting out a sigh.

She was really surprised it had taken him this long to confront her about you dropping off the map as far as he was concerned. She turned towards him with a smile "Kev I know what you're gonna ask me but it's not my place to tell you. If she wants you to know she'll find you until then just let her have her space ok?"

"Wow it's like that?" He couldn't hide the shock on his face. She patted his shoulder with a comforting smile "Sorry but yea it's like that"

[witchygagirlwrites]

Close Enough to Perfect

Having a baby with Kevin headcanons

·You and Kevin met when he drug Adam into Med for a flu shot

·You cracked up laughing at the fact that a grown man needed his best friend to take him to the doctor

· Your laugh had been the best sound Kevin had ever heard

· He asked you out that day

·You fell harder and faster than you'd ever fallen and so did Kevin

·When you found out you were pregnant, it scared you. While you knew Kevin loved you the idea of a child being added well you weren't sure if he wanted that with you.

·The day you told him he didn't waste a second pulling you into his arms with a huge smile on his face "I'm gonna be a dad?"

·He told the unit as soon as he got to work so you ended up getting congratulation phone calls and texts the entire day

·The two of you were already practically living together so it just made sense to move what little was still at your place to Kevin's

·Jordan and Adam helped to set up the nursery

·The day Nevaeh was born Kevin never left your side. He helped your hand, got anything you asked for and supported you throughout labor

·That night once everyone had left you fought against how tired you were just to watch him with her

·Kevin was the best father you'd ever seen

·You'd wake up when you'd hear her cry and start to get out of bed only to hear him over the monitor soothing her

·When you went back to work after having her Platt and Voight helped to make sure Kevin was covered should you have to work a night shift

·She was a few months old when your birthday rolled around

·Kevin dressed Nevaeh while you got ready and already had her bundled from the Chicago winter and ready to go

·Kim had cooked dinner so everyone was meeting up at her place

·Kevin took Nevaeh the moment the two of you stepped into Kim's apartment.

·You were chatting with Adam and Hailey when Jay called your name.

·"What's up Halstead?" You asked and he pointed to Jordan who was holding Nevaeh "I think she needs a change" you smiled and walked over to Jordan who handed her over "Did you see that spot on her onesie?" He asked

·When you looked her onesie read "Mommy will you marry daddy?"

·Kevin stepped around the corner with a small box in his hand

·You of course said yes

·He'd teased that he knew the proposal wasn't perfect considering he'd bought the ring before Nevaeh was ever born

·But having Kevin and Nevaeh was as close to perfect as you would ever get and you couldn't be happier

[witchygagirlwrites]

Dad's day

Headcanons for Mouse having his first full day with the twins by himself. @gottaboopthesnoot

·Mouse never dreamt of getting married

·Until he met you

·He never dreamt of being a father

·Until you handed him that first ultrasound

·The day your baby was born and instead of just one girl there was two it was a bit daunting (no one could explain just how Wendy had managed to block Abby from view at every ultrasound but she had)

·Seeing how fast you took to motherhood made a bit of self doubt rear it's ugly head

·His first big jump was when the girls were a couple weeks old and Kim took you out for the day so you could have a girls day

·Did the day start off simple enough? Well yes but doesn't everything

·By noon he was sure he was the worst father that ever walked and had even managed to yell at Adam and Jay for simply offering to come over and help (He was the dad wasn't he? He didn't need their uncles)

·Not long after though he managed to change Wendy's diaper while burping Abby and felt like he'd won the world series at that accomplishment

·When you got home both girls were in their cribs for a nap and he was reading a book in the living room

·You asked him how the day had went despite him knowing for a fact Adam had hung up with him and called you

·He was honest with you but when he got to the point of describing when he finally got the hang of fixing two bottles at once the smile he had was luminous

·You had simply smiled and kissed his cheek "I knew you would be fine. You're an amazing father already Greg but next time go easy on the boys, they love their nieces"

·He promised to call and apologize to both Adam and Jay

·You and the girls were his world and while there would be times he still doubted himself it was nice to know he had you at his side and that both of you had plenty of people willing to help

[witchygagirlwrites]

Them Losing You

Trigger warning for talk of blood, death and dying

Kevin Atwater

He was at your side in a moment catching you before you ever crumpled to the ground "Look at me baby...yeah there you go..just hold on ok? Just a few more minutes angel please stay with me..I love you" you could feel his hands shake when he applied pressure to your wound. "Kev.." You tried to tell him you would hold on, that you loved him too. You tried not to close your eyes but god you were so cold and the darkness beckoning you was warm. You felt your eyes flutter shut and heard Kevin scream your name before darkness washed over you.

He felt the moment you were gone. That light inside of you left and he was holding an empty shell.

Greg "Mouse" Gerwitz

He was helping with surveillance for the op. Hearing gunfire over the radio was something he'd gotten used to. It still made his heart skip a beat but your voice would usually be the one to come across "Suspect apprehended" or "Suspect down" but this time was different. The gunfire stopped suddenly and he heard Voight's voice ring clear across "WE HAVE AN OFFICER DOWN. GET ME A DAMN AMBULANCE"

He was out the van and running the block to the warehouse all of you had entered. He spotted your still form in the middle of the empty space. Adam was still doing cpr but he heard Jay say "She's gone man. She's gone" he barely registered hands on him attempting to offer support as he fell to his knees. Every thought of his future you'd been front and center now that was ripped away. The woman he loved was gone.

Hailey Upton

She always double checked your vest while all of you were getting suited up. Today was no different. She'd adjusted the straps and teased Adam that he better bring you back in once piece.

She had turned just a half second too slow and saw the bullet when it tore through your neck. Jay took out the shooter and she slid on her knees to your side. Pulling you close. She held pressure on the wound but knew you'd never make it until the ambulance got there. "Hails" your voice shook and she felt tears streaming down her face "Don't talk baby. You'll be ok" "You're a bad liar" you said weakly and she knew you were fading. She couldn't save you so she softly kissed your cheek, her tears sliding down to mix with your blood. Every day she'd been so careful yet she still lost you.

[witchygagirlwrites]

New Start

Request by @lifesaclimb-buttheviewisgreat (TRIGGER WARNING FOR MENTION OF DOMESTIC ABUSE)

You took a deep breath before walking up the stairs leading into the twenty first precinct. This was a new start not only for you but for your son Lucas as well.

When you walked through the door sergeant Platt glanced up but when she was about to look away she did a quick double take "Y/N?" She was around the desk and pulling you into a hug. You felt a smile slip onto your face at seeing such a familiar and welcoming face first thing.

"Hey Trudy. How have you and Mouch been?" You asked once she pulled away. She stared at you for a moment before smiling herself "We're good. How have you been? I know you went to stay with your aunt in Rockford for a while" you nodded "Yeah but you know Chicago's home. She got a chance to move back here and since she works from home it's perfect to be able to leave Lucas with someone I trust. When I started sniffing around about transferring back Al gave me a call saying that Voight needed a slot filled in intelligence so here I am"

"Well you know if you need anything me and Randy are always here to help. You're with family here and you know we'll have your back" you knew that. Hell you wouldn't have been alive today had it not been for the crew at firehouse 51. "Are my prints already in to get upstairs or do you need to walk me up?" You asked motioning up the stairs. "They're in but if you don't mind I'd like to walk you up and maybe see some new pictures of Lucas since I haven't seen him in a while"

You handed your phone over opened up to the most recent album of Lucas. Trudy followed you up the stairs commenting on every photo along the way. Once the two of you made it up to the bullpen she handed your phone back right before everyone turned to look at you. Luckily you knew most everyone you'd be working alongside but as far as you knew only Trudy, Al and Hank knew the real reason as to why you'd up and left the city.

Jay and Adam were the first two to your side welcoming you back and to the unit. Then it was Kim and Kevin. Hailey Upton Jay's new partner introduced herself with a smile before Al pulled you into a hug "Welcome home kid" "Where's Hank and Detective Dawson?" You asked about the time Hank's voice answered from behind you "Right here"

You turned to see him and Antonio walking up the stairs. You smiled "Well look here my first official day and already beating the boss to work" Antonio cracked a smile at your words. Very few people got away with teasing Hank Voight. He shook his head "Keep it up and you'll already be my favorite" then he motioned to Antonio "You know Antonio don't you?" You nodded "We've worked together in passing when I was on patrol out this precinct"

"Well you'll be working together more than in passing now. You'll be partnered with him" you held your hand out and when Antonio shook it he said "Look forward to working with you"

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You fit in seamlessly with the unit. It came from years of knowing most of them and from the trust that you had for Al and Hank.

The biggest surprise was just how smoothly you and Antonio worked together. Like you'd told Hank when you were assigned to the twenty first as a patrolman you'd worked with all of intelligence in passing but working side by side with Antonio you got to know him a lot better. The two of you had quickly become good friends.

You were currently sitting next to Jay on top of Hailey's desk while Hank did a run down of the perp all of you were currently after. "Y/N you and Dawson will be undercover to do a gun buy. Far as he knows Antonio is a big player in the mexican cartel and you're his girl" you leaned around Jay and winked at Antonio "Why can't I be the player and you be the arm candy?"  "How's your spanish partner?" He asked with a smirk.

You rolled your eyes and said "Sé lo suficiente como para no atrapar una bala" Hailey covered her mouth with her hand and a grin slipped onto Jay and Adam's faces. "Let's try to do more besides not catching a bullet though?" Antonio suggested so you shrugged "Fine ruin all my fun. Just saying you would've looked better in the outfit"

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A few hours later you were standing in a warehouse waiting for the crime scene techs to roll on scene.

"Good job Y/N" Antonio said with a smile offering you your jacket from his car considering the outfit you'd had to wear to be convincing as a cartel members girlfriend wouldn't be your chosen style. "Thanks Toni. Still think you'd look better in this outfit" he tilted his head to the side looking over you and you felt your cheeks try to warm but pushed it down by laughing when he said "Don't think I got the legs for that"

Your phone started vibrating in the jacket pocket so you pulled it out to see it was your aunt. "I gotta take this" you told Antonio and walked outside nodding to a few officers you knew along the way.

"Is everything ok?" You asked as soon as you answered and heard your aunt let out a sigh "Yeah baby everything's fine. Lucas just refuses to go to sleep without hearing your voice" you smiled feeling the knot in your stomach release "Let me talk to him" you heard the phone shuffle a bit before Lucas said "Mommy?" "Hey little man. Aunt Ann said you wanted to talk to me. I'll be home in a couple hours and I promise I'll be there for breakfast ok?" "Ok. Love you" "Love you more" you heard him hand the phone back to Ann then run off. She laughed at something he did before saying "He just wanted to check in. I'll see you when you get home"  "See you then" you said and hung up.

"Lucas checking in?" Antonio asked from behind you. You turned with a smile "Glad he waited so long to call. Ann would've freaked if I hadn't answered. I need to get her Trudy's new number so if I'm out and can't answer" "I feel like there's something all of us besides Trudy, Hank and Al have missed" you ducked your head to not meet his gaze. Something about Antonio had put you at ease even back when you were in uniform going through hell at home. Now you were so grateful to not only him but all the guys in the unit for their nature.

"Maybe I'll end up telling you Dawson" he watched you for a second then nodding scratching at the bit of scruff on his chin from missing a shave "I've got Diego and Eva this weekend. Was thinking of going to the zoo. If you, Lucas and Ann want to come we'd be glad for the company"  you bit your lip considering his offer then nodded "Sounds good. Forewarning Lucas will probably not to leave the tigers" Antonio grinned "That was Diego's favorite when he was that age too"

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You were walking a bit behind Ann and the kids. She was in heaven pushing Lucas in his stroller and chatting with Eva and Diego. She always loved kids more than having to deal with adults.

"Having fun partner?" Antonio asked and you heard Lucas giggle when Diego handed him a stuffed tiger from the gift shop "Very much" you answered with a smile glancing at Antonio then took a deep breath "You've never asked about his dad" he stopped walking for a second and turned to look at you "Didn't figure it was my business. You'll tell me if you want me to know"

Ann looked back to see where you were and smiled when she saw you talking to Antonio "Y/N We're gonna head to the cafe and go ahead and grab a table" you nodded "We'll catch up" Eva took over Lucas' stroller and you watched them walk off then turned back to Antonio "Do you want to know?" You asked and he ran a hand across the back of his neck "I wanna know why you flinch at times if one of us guys goes to high five you yet you have no problem taking down a suspect heads taller than you. I wanna know why you hate when anyone close to you yells. Strangers I've noticed doesn't bother you but when Hank yelled last week I saw him look straight at you afterwards then he apologized later"

"My ex. Lucas' father was abusive. It started off verbal and emotional abuse. That turned physical sometime around my sixth month. When I was eight and a half months pregnant he hit me hard enough I blacked out. When I woke up the house was on fire and I was trapped. Had it not been for Kelly Severide and Joe Cruz me nor Lucas would be standing here today"

You hadn't realized you were crying until Antonio tentatively pulled you into his arms. When he felt you relax against his chest he started to gently rub your back. "Y/N You are such an amazing woman. You're one of the best cops I know and you're a fricking super mom to that little boy. He deserves to burn in hell for ever laying a hand on you" you laughed despite the tears in your eyes "He got life plus two. Not to mention Hank and Al knows some of the fellas he's in with" "Good" Antonio said then smiled down at you "Let's go find Ann and the kids cause Eva has my debit card and they very well might just leave us here"

You laughed and pulled away from him "Well is now a bad time to mention Ann has the keys to my car?"

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After that day your relationship with Antonio started to shift. You worked beautifully as partners still but there was something else there brewing under the surface. Maybe it was the fact that Lucas started wanting to talk to Antonio as well when he'd call before bed when you were working later. Or maybe it was how Eva and Diego started wanting to stay with their dad more and more half of the time ending up staying at your place with Ann and Lucas after Antonio cleared it with Laura once with a reply from her of "I don't care. If she's your partner her aunt must be ok"

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You were sitting cross legged on top of Antonio's desk working through the stack of files you were digging through. He'd went with Adam to meet a C.I. so you were doing the paper trail part. "When are you gonna admit you have a thing for him?" Hailey whispered leaning over you to grab a few more files "When you admit you have a thing for Jay" you responded laughing when she blushed darker red than your shirt and scurried back to her desk.

Did you have some confusing feelings for Antonio? Maybe. It just seemed like at every turn he was there to support any move you made.

When you chose to finally tell the rest of the unit why you'd left Chicago and what the scars on your left shoulder was from he'd stood next to you. When Lucas got sick a few weeks after that he'd come to med and stayed with you until Lucas was released then went to pick up his medicine so you could take him straight home. When Eva got her heart broke because her boyfriend broke up with her Antonio had called you at her request and didn't seem the least bit put off by her wanting you to comfort her.

Somewhere along the line you'd crossed a line and didn't have any clue what to do about.

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Another week passed and your thoughts hadn't changed a lot. In fact the feelings for Antonio had seemed to grow deeper. You just had no clue how he felt.

You were sitting on the side of Lucas' bed next to him reading the book he'd chosen to him. "Mommy?" He asked and you smiled "Yeah baby?" "Do you like Toni?" You stared open mouthed at your three year old. "How do you mean baby? I mean he's my friend and my partner" "No I mean can Toni be my daddy?" You were speechless for a few seconds then finally managed to say "Lucas baby that's a loaded question little man" "I like Toni" he said with a yawn then scooted further down in his bed and you knew that meant he'd be out soon.

You turned off his bedroom light then walked in the living room where Ann was watching a movie. She glanced up when you walked in then paused the movie "Y/N? You're pale sweetheart. Come sit down"

You sat heavily next to her and was quiet for several long seconds until she finally said "Dammit tell me what's wrong?" You repeated what Lucas said and she cracked up laughing "And that surprises you? For months now every weekend and half the weekdays Eva and Diego end up staying here. They're spending so much time with Lucas Eva's phone background is a selfie with her and both boys. I have seen you come back. My niece the beautiful, strong woman who's went through hell is finally smiling again, you sleep most nights, you don't flinch when you hear a firetruck. You're healing and I think some of that is the very loud fact that you're in love with Antonio and him with you even if you haven't admitted it to each other or yourselves"

You let her words sink in and felt the truth of them like a weight being pulled off your shoulders "What the hell am I supposed to do?" She shook her head with another laugh "If what Eva says is true he'll tell you eventually how he feels because apparently he talks about you to the kids like a lot"

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You tried not to let Ann's words get to you too much. You still had to keep your head on straight. A couple more weeks passed and everything changed.

The raid was supposed to be simple enough but somehow you and Kevin got pinned down in the back of a building with bullets raining down on you.

By some miracle the situation was able to be contained with no one ending up dead. You were standing next to Kevin recounting what had went down for Hank when you spotted Antonio heading your way. Hank went to talk to one of the scene techs and Kevin walked off to talk to Al so you turned to face Antonio who pulled you into a crushing hug.

"Toni you good?" You asked against his chest and he nodded "Yeah I am now" you pulled back to look at him and saw the worry in his eyes and realized that was for you. "I'm ok partner" you assured him and he nodded "I'm glad. I don't know what I would've done if I'd lost you" "Antonio?" You said it like a question but Hank was calling both of you so he said "Can we talk after shift?" You nodded then followed him over to Hank.

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When your shift ended you walked downstairs and was leaning against your car when Antonio made it to the parking lot. "It's after shift" you said as soon as you saw him and he shook his head "Not here. Let's go grab a coffee. I already told Ann" you rolled your eyes at him and your aunt teaming up on you. "Fine but we gotta stop by the bakery and get Lucas something plus you can grab some muffins since Eva and Diego will be at your place tomorrow" He smiled and said "Sounds good"

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You sat across from Antonio watching as he stirred his coffee. The two of you were sitting in a corner booth of your favorite coffee shop and he'd done everything but talk. When he reached to stir his coffee again you laid your hand over his to stop any movement. His eyes went from your hand up to your face and he smiled "I said we'd talk didn't I?" "Yes you did" you replied.

He let out a breath then dove right in "Y/N since you became my partner. Everything is better. I look forward to seeing you every day. I meant it when I said you're an amazing woman. You and Lucas mean the world to me. I couldn't imagine my life without you and him in it. Hell i think Eva and Diego would disown me for you and him at this point. Today? You and Kev getting caught like that and me not being able to get to you? It clarified something I already knew"

"And that would be?" You asked your heart beating in your throat at this point. You saw a blush work it's way up his face to his ears before he said "I think I'm in love with you" you were stunned silent. Did he really mean that?

He mistook your silence for something else and went to stand up "It doesn't have to change our friendship I'll still be there for you and Lucas and I hope you'll be there for Diego and Eva especially since I just got full custody but I just needed to tell you" you snapped out of it fast enough to grab his hand and pull him back to you "Antonio wait!" He met your eyes and must have liked what he saw there because a smile slipped onto his face "I love you too. Lucas loves you too and I will always be there for Diego and Eva"

"Does that mean I can finally kiss you?" He asked his eyes flicking down to your lips then back up. You didn't try to hide your smile when you said "I'd be offended if you didn't"

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Three years passed and you were sitting in front of the fireplace on Christmas morning watching the kids open presents. Diego was showing Lucas how to work his video games while Eva snapped photos of her brothers on her new phone.

"Is that all?" Antonio asked from his position next to the tree and you cut your eyes at Eva "Want to grab that last one for your dad?" She nodded and grabbed Lucas' hand "C'mon Luca let's go get daddy his present" Antonio cut his eyes at you when all three kids disappeared "What'd you do?" You grinned "you'll see"

They came back with Eva carrying the present but she handed it to Lucas to give Antonio then sat next to you leaning her head over on her shoulder. Antonio looked a bit suspicious until he tore open the package and his eyes teared up. Inside was the paperwork you'd gotten a week before where Lucas' adoption had become final. "Lucas Dawson" he said quietly then laid it to the side "C'mere buddy" and Lucas jumped into his arms with a laugh "You're officially my daddy!"

You felt Diego and Eva both hug you "And we love you like a mom Y/N" you smiled at your little family then said "I couldn't love any of you more than I already do"

[witchygagirlwrites]

Confessions

A friends with benefits arrangement with Kelly ends up being so much more. @gottaboopthesnoot fluff?

The first time you'd ended up in bed with Kelly both of you were coming off of being dumped. You walked into Molly's with the intention to just have a few drinks then head home alone. April and Ethan were headed out as you were headed in so you thanked Ethan for holding the door open for you then headed to the bar.

"Herrman my good man can I please get a whiskey on the rocks and make it a double" he let out a low whistle and started making your drink "Rough day sweetheart?" You wanted to laugh but simply shook your head "I lost two patients that came into med today then my dumbass now former boyfriend decided it was in fact too stressful to be dating a doctor who refused to transfer from emergency medicine" "Yikes. Here this will make you feel a little better" you took the glass from him with a smile and slid the money across the bar plus some for the tip jar "Thanks Herrman"

He walked away so you glanced around the room. Jay was sitting in the corner with Will, Adam and Kevin. They waved when they spotted you so headed over "Hey fellas how's it going?" Will cut his eyes at your glass "Bout as good as yours" you laughed then looked from Adam to Kevin "Bad day?" Kevin letting out a breath told you all you needed to know so you turned back towards the bar "Herrman I got the next round for this table!" He nodded "You got it sweetheart" 

You patted Jay's shoulder before you walked off and said "see you boys later"

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You headed for a corner booth and spotted Kelly sitting alone. You sat next to him on a stool and bumped his hand "Well hello Severide" he smiled up at you "Hey Y/N" you noticed he was lacking a certain blonde appendage he'd acquired "Where's shit what's her name..Kristy? Brittany?" "Jessica and she dumped me by text around eleven this morning" you did laugh then and held up your phone "I got dumped at two in between losing a seventy year old to hypothermia and a sixteen year old to a ruptured appendix of all things" he tilted his head with a laugh "Ok you win"

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The two of you ended up talking for the better part of an hour. "Well I guess I'm gonna head home" you said pushing your glass away. "Want a ride?" He asked so you shrugged. He'd only had one beer and it was long gone "Sure"

You slipped your jacket back on then followed him outside and to where he'd parked his mustang. You smiled when he held the passenger door open "What a gentleman" he walked around then slid into the driver's seat. You watched him as you buckled up then he pulled out onto the road. 

Kelly had always been a good looking guy. He was a little cocky at times but damn you'd bet two months salary he could back it up. You shook your head to clear the sudden rush of hormones then turned to look out the window until Kelly pulled up behind your car and parked. "Want to come in for some coffee?" You asked without even thinking and were rewarded with that gorgeous smile of his "Sure"

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One thing led to another and the morning light found the two of you tangled up in your sheets and each other. You woke up and felt his warmth at your back as memories from the previous night flooded your mind. When he woke up he let his lips trail lazily over your bare shoulder "Morning" hearing his voice so thick with sleep while feeling him pressed hard against you made you squirm slightly "Morning" you said with a smile that turned into a gasp when he bit down gently on your shoulder. "Are you wanting to continue last night?" You asked reaching back to pull him forward for a kiss "If you do" was his response.

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That had been over four months ago. The two of you weren't dating per say as much as blowing off steam or well you were pretty sure that's how it was for Kelly. You had started falling for him somewhere along the month and a half mark. How could you not? He was gorgeous, amazing in bed, one of the sweetest men you'd ever known and genuinely seemed to care about you. 

You were scared that if you told him how you felt you'd more than likely not only lose him out your bed but as a friend also and you weren't really to risk it so you buried it.

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You were at work grabbing test results from Maggie when a bad wave of nausea washed over you. "You ok Y/N? You look a little green?" She asked so you forced a smile "I haven't eaten. After I sign off on Mrs. Rodriguez I'll come raid your snack drawer"

"You know where it is" she replied with a smile even if she still seemed apprehensive. You told Mrs. Rodriguez her aftercare instructions and was walking out her room when another wave of nausea hit and the next thing you knew the world went black.

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You woke up in an exam room with an iv of fluid going into your arm. Will was shining a light in your eyes "Jesus Y/N you scared all of us. I'm gonna run some bloodwork. It appears like you're just dehydrated but I want to make sure""Thanks Will" you said right before he walked out. Some doctor you were, couldn't even keep yourself healthy.

 You heard a knock on the door before Maggie popped her head in with a bottle of juice in her hand "No solids until your blood work is back but this should help" you sat up a little and took the juice "Thanks Maggie. I don't know what happened. I mean I've been feeling a little off but I thought it was just all the hours I've been working"  she patted your hand reassuringly then said "Just rest. We'll figure it out"

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"Run that by me one more time Halstead" you repeated despite reading the results yourself "You're about eight weeks. That's what caused the fainting. We can make you an appointment with the OB of your choice to discuss options but for today Goodwin wants you to head home and rest. Natalie is going to cover your shift for the next couple days"

"Thanks Will" you were in a bit of a fog as you walked out and to your car. How the hell were you supposed to tell Kelly? 

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You made it a few blocks before you had to pull over. You were crying hard enough your shoulders were shaking what the hell were you going to do?

A baby. You were in love with Kelly and pregnant and he was clueless to both of those things. You wanted to keep the baby but you also knew you had to tell him.

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Once you managed to get home you grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. You needed a hot shower to clear your mind. You'd texted Kelly that Goodwin had sent you home so he'd in return texted back saying he'd be over the next morning when he got off shift. 

At least you had twelve or so hours before you had to face him. You could eat and sleep. 

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No matter how you laid all you could think about was the fact that you had a baby inside of you. Yours and Kelly's baby. You finally managed to fall asleep curled up on your side. 

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You were woke up around seven to a pounding at your door and your phone ringing. You picked it up to see you had seven missed calls and the person currently calling was Kelly. 

You answered it but instead of saying hello you asked "Is that you at my door?" "Been here for ten minutes sweetheart. Started to kick it in. I was getting worried" you smiled despite yourself "I'll come let you in" then hung up.

Your nerves started fluttering and you cursed when a wave of nausea hit you again. The moment you unlocked the door you barely saw Kelly's face before you had to hold up one finger and rush to the bathroom.

Kelly kicked the door shut and quickly followed you. When he saw the position you were in he crouched behind you pulling your hair out the way and started rubbing small circles into your back.

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Once your stomach was emptied either nerves or hormones or both hit you and you started to cry. Kelly pulled you into his arms and sat leaned against the wall gently rocking you for god knows how long before you managed to calm down "Baby what's wrong?" He asked and you almost started crying again.

"Kelly I'm sorry" he pulled back far enough to look in your face "about what?" You could tell he was so confused about everything so you took a deep breath then just decided to rip the bandaid off "I'm in love with you and I'm eight weeks pregnant"

A thousand emotions flashed across his face. Shock was the most prominent. You started to try to stand up but he pulled you back down in his lap "Hold on Y/N just let me catch up. You said you love me?" You nodded "It's ok if you don't feel the same way" he cut you off by his lips crashing into yours.

When he pulled away he smiled "I love you too. I have for a while. Now about that second thing you said?" You swallowed hard and looked into those bright blue eyes that you loved so much "Remember that close call you had? And we spent the entire night in bed?" He nodded slowly "Well I apparently got pregnant that night" you nearly whispered glancing down at your hands.

Several long silent seconds flicked by before he said "So you love me and I'm gonna be a dad. Not how I figured this would go" you looked up to meet his eyes right as he added "but I'm happy and I will be here for you and our baby every step of the way"

You started crying again but this time it was tears of relief "I love you Kelly" "I love you too Y/N" he said with a smile then ran his hand across your stomach and leaned down before saying "and we both love you"

[witchygagirlwrites]

Cant Love You Back

*Not My Gif*

Because the song was stuck in my hand and apparently I am a fucking narcissist that loves pain so here ya go. @gottaboopthesnoot

There was a time in Kelly's life he was simply coasting through. He'd bust his ass at work then either go home to an empty apartment or go get drunk and go home with a girl whose name he had forgotten by the time he left her place. 

That changed the day Chief Boden announced fifty one was getting a new addition. You stood at the front of the room as Boden introduced you. Kelly offered you his hand and from the moment you smiled at him he felt something start to flutter inside him he had never dreamt of giving the light of day.

You fit in as if you'd been a part of the team from the start. Everyone that met you seemed to be drawn to you, Kelly worse of all. He'd find himself scanning for you after a tough call just to see for himself you were fine. After shift would end he'd make any excuse to spend more time with you 

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"So when are you gonna bite the bullet and ask her out?" Matt asked after watching Kelly follow you around like a puppy for two solid months. 

When Kelly cut his eyes at him he raised both hands defensively "Just saying man. It's painfully obvious how you feel. I can't blame you she's a great woman and beautiful. I think she feels the same but you're her Lieutenant and she's not going to admit anything that may make her seem as if she's ladder climbing" 

"That you or Gabby talking?" Kelly asked looking out into the bay where you were currently helping Gabby and Sylvie restock their rig. "Little bit of both. I'm just saying Kelly you've changed since she got here and it's not bad changes. Go with your gut. It's never led you wrong" 

Kelly felt Matt patt his shoulder before hearing his footsteps walk away. Had he changed that much since meeting you? When he thought about it he didn't remember the last time he'd drank over a couple beer and he'd been content with an empty bed knowing he'd see you the following shift 

You threw him off balance in the best way possible. You wouldn't blink an eye going into a fire but volunteered in the n.i.c.u. on your days off. You were a perfect combination of that fire he'd always crave and the peace that he desperately needed.

Hearing your laughter drew him out his thoughts and he glanced up to see you walking into the common room laughing about something Slyvie had said. When your eyes met his you smiled even further "Hey Kelly" "Hey Y/N can i talk to you for a minute?" The moment he asked Slyvie and Gabby shared a look then made up some excuse to be scarce.

"What's up?" You asked smiling up at him and Jesus christ he felt like a teenager with their first crush "You think you may wanna grab dinner with me sometime?" "Kelly Severide are you asking me out?" You questioned and he nearly blushed "Yeah?" You took a step closer to him and leaned up to leave a kiss on his cheek "good cause I am doing absolutely nothing Friday night and I have a new outfit sitting in my closet that desperately needs to see the light of day" 

"About frickin time!" Both of you both turned when you heard Mouch who was sitting on the couch watching t.v. but it was apparent he'd seen your exchange. "Excuse me?" You asked with a laugh so Mouch shrugged "I had the two and a half month mark in the betting pool" 

Your mouth fell open in shock and Kelly couldn't help but laugh when you recovered enough to say "That's it! I'm calling sergeant Platt!" and Mouch started backtracking trying his best to apologize but you winked at Kelly then ran off already dialing on your phone.

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Kelly pulled up in front of your apartment building around seven and slowly walked inside. Your apartment was on the second floor so headed for the elevator while he sent you a text that he was on the way up.

By the time he stepped off the elevator you were standing in the hall waiting on him. You were wearing black ankle boots with a black dress and a red leather jacket. Your hair was down in loose curls around your face and he'd never seen a more beautiful sight. "Wow" he breathed and a smile spread across your face "Does that mean you like?" He nodded quickly "Very much"

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The night went by too quick in Kelly's opinion. The two of you went to dinner and a movie then stopped at Molly's for a drink before he took you home. When he walked in with his arm around your waist it just felt right. Otis slid two drinks across the bar with a smile "These are from Mouch and Trudy"  you leaned back in your seat and spotted the two so you raised your bottle to them with a smile then turned back to Kelly "So Severide I was going to wait until you take me home but you owe me a kiss. I mean i technically kissed you first"

"Is that right?" He asked with a smirk that only deepened when you said "oh yeah definitely. I mean I've heard that you're some sort of ladies man yet all night the furthest you've went is home my hand or putting your arm around me" he cut you off mid sentence with a kiss. The kiss was gentle, barely a brush of the lips but when he pulled back a smile was on both of your faces "So does that mean this is going to be more than one date?" He asked and was answered by you grabbing the collar of his shirt and pulling him in for another kiss. 

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The first time you told Kelly you loved him was after a huge fight between the two of you. You'd been staying at his place more and more so he was on the verge of asking you to move in but it just so happened a friend of yours had stopped by the firehouse to catch up. That friend just so happened to be male and Kelly's jealousy flared up.

The night had ended with you storming out of his apartment slamming the door behind you. You didn't answer any of his calls or texts and when he came over to your place you opened the door long enough to say "Kelly if you care about me at all you'll leave"

The next day he was miserable walking into fifty one. He spotted your car and prayed you'd talk to him but you stayed close to either Gabby and Sylvie or once they left on a call you walked over to where Herrman was sitting and struck up a conversation with him.

A call came out for an apartment fire with civilians trapped. Kelly was watching you take your orders from Matt and wanted nothing more than to tell you to be safe before you went  in but didn't want to distract you if you were still upset.  You started to walk past him but stopped just long enough to say "I love you Kelly" then jogged to catch up with your crew who were headed in. He had just a few seconds to process what you'd said before heading in the other entrance with Cruz.

The moment the building was cleared you were outside helping roll the hoses up. Kelly had just got through talking with Matt and chief Boden when he saw you. He caught your hand when you bent down to pick up another hose and the moment your eyes met his he said "I love you too. I'm sorry i was a jealous asshole. I've just never felt this way" you rolled your eyes but the smile you had told him all he needed to know even before you said "Good because neither have I. I'm not going anywhere Kelly" 

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You and Kelly were coming up on your two year anniversary. Your present had been sitting in the top drawer of his dresser for weeks. Gabby had went with him to help pick out what cut and style of ring she thought you'd like and of course she'd somehow managed to find out your ring size as well.

He had everything planned. Where he was going to take you, what he was going to say. The thing about plans is that sometimes the unexpected happens.

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The call had been simple enough. A warehouse had caught fire on the south side. You'd went in with Matt to clear the base floor where a few workers were trapped. You were following close behind Matt "Fire Department call out!" The haze of smoke was bad enough you could barely see in front of you.

You took another step and heard the crack right before your footing gave way. One moment you were falling the next you felt a sharp pain rip through your abdomen. You looked down to see a piece of rebar sticking out an inch above your navel. Your hands were shaking as you touched the wound trying to apply pressure but the slightest movement ripped a scream from your lips. "Y/N!" You could hear Matt's voice and knew you just had to hold on.

A moment later you heard him across the radio "Floor collapsed. Y/N's hurt. I need assistance" when his face appeared next to you the look on your face told you everything you needed to know about your injury. "Matt if something happens. Help Kelly please" you begged him your only thoughts being what would happen to the man you loved. Gabby told you how bad he'd gotten about Shay had been killed. You didn't want him falling in that hole. "Hey don't talk like that. You'll be fine. Your anniversary is in two weeks you'll be on your feet by then" 

Matt's hand found yours and gripped it tight. You could hear voices and knew everyone was working their way to you.

Kelly was fighting to get inside to your side but Boden called him back "You'll be in the way. Let them get her out then you can ride with them to med" it took everything in him to not argue. The moment he saw Cruz and Capp emerge he ran to your side feeling himself weaken when he saw how severely injured you were.

"Hey baby" you managed weakly as he climbed into the ambulance next to you while Gabby worked to stop the flow of blood. "Hey beautiful" he said with a smile that was marred by the tears flowing down his face. Every bump the ambulance hit caused a grimace to flash across your face. "Kelly I don't want to die" you whispered right as your grip on his hand loosened and the heart monitor on you flat lined. 

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"If love could have saved Y/N she would have lived forever. Love from her aunt and uncle who raised her, from her family at firehouse fifty one and from her loving boyfriend. Sadly fate as it seemed had other plans. We don't know why she was taken from us so soon and as we grieve today may the loving warmth of her spirit live on in all of us she held close" 

Kelly sat in the front of the church staring at the photo of you that had been chosen. Those eyes he loved looking into that never opened again after you whispered how you didn't want to die. That smile that always made even his worse day better that he'd never see again. He never got to ask you to marry him. He never got to see you pregnant with his child. He'd never get to tell you again just how much you meant to him.

He'd love you every day for the rest of his life. If only he could manage to love you back to this world then maybe his heart wouldn't feel like it had been ripped out his chest the moment you took your last breath.