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jarofstyles · 8 months ago

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Stacy’s Mom

Stacy’s mom has got it goin’ on… and Harry’s definitely been noticing for a while.

We haven’t seen a lot of reverse age gap fics and figured it was our time to contribute to the cause. We hope you enjoy!

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Warnings- age gap, unprotected sex, teasing, creampie, soft dom!H

———————

His lip was bitten as he watched her walk across the backyard, sunglasses hiding his gaze. The back of her sundress brushed the softness of her thighs, her hair pulled up in a claw clip as she placed snacks down on the glass table for the group of friends that often frequented the pool at her house. The very house she had won in the divorce just three years ago.

Stacy’s parents had always been generous when it came to letting their home be the epicenter of their friend groups’ hang out. It didn’t stop when they all came home from uni for the summer, everyone falling back into their routine with the hometown group, or after they’d graduated and some had stayed in town. Drunken food at the diner, pub crawls- legally this time-, the mall, the summer carnival, and movie nights and pool days at Stacy’s house. It was spacious and clean and it had only changed a little bit since the divorce. Her hotshot lawyer father paid a nice big chunk of change in alimony keeping the comfortable lifestyle afloat, one Harry was aiming to get for himself. Hopefully after he opened up a garage or two, he’d be able to grab a house like this. Make someone happy.

The problem is, the last three summers all he could think about was someone he definitely shouldn’t be.

It was no secret that she was incredible. Everyone loved Y/N from the start and not just because she was the ‘cool, young mom’ who didn’t make them call her by her last name. She was genuinely kind, loved to make them snacks, would pick up anyone who needed it, let them nurse their hangovers at their house and made them the greasy breakfasts they needed to get through the mornings. The woman was an angel- and she had an exterior to match.

It seemed like in the last few years though, she had been rediscovering herself and her body. Dressing in ways she hadn’t before, ways he knew Stacy’s father wouldn’t like. Denim shorts and tank tops, sundresses, the like. Things that made Harry’s crush morph from minor to major. Y/N had become the centerfold to his wet dreams, the woman he compared other girls to, the one he closed his eyes and imagined in the shower when he was stroking off. He watched her in her kitchen while she chopped up fruit for them, her back turned and imagined approaching her from behind and placing kisses on her neck, hiking the dress up and offering her all the fun she could want.

There was something so tempting about the older woman. Harry’d always sort of had that preference, but it had intensified as he grew up. His friends liked to prod at him about being into MILFs and he couldn’t deny it. He was. There was certainly one mother he’d love to fuck, and it was Stacy’s. In all honesty, it was half the reason he kept showing up here.

“I hate to say it, Stace- your mom is banging.” Jeremy said what Harry was thinking but got a smack upside the head with a waterlogged pool noodle, making him yelp.

“Do not talk about my mom like that you freak!” She hissed. “She’s a beautiful woman but none of you are going to even think about her in any way but my mother.” Her warning glare did little to deter Harry, though he merely shrugged at her to get her to think he agreed. There was no way in the world that he would ever turn away a chance to be alone with Y/N. He would beg on his knees for a chance to touch her.

“Don’t look at me! I’m just saying it. Harry’s the one who’s the MILF Hunter.” Jacob snickered, making him raise an eyebrow. It was true and he wanted to smirk- because yes, he’d fucked a few older women before. Being a mechanic during the week and a bartender during the weekend had their perks, including women who found him to be more than a bit interesting. There had been a few instances he’d taken them up on their offers, quelling their loneliness and lack of orgasm with his own brand of fun. But none of them had ever appealed to him quite like Y/N.

The forbidden fruit theory, maybe. He really, really shouldn’t even entertain it. A crush turned into an obsession though, he was fucked. The moment he thought he had a chance, he would be taking it. As cocky as he could be, he knew he would be able to handle her.

“Yeah, but Harry’s not going to say stupid shit to my mom.” She huffed.

With a smirk on his face, Harry gave a half ass nod before watching the woman of discussion shoot them a beaming smile across the yard before she turned to go back inside. Harry’s eyes ate up every curve, every drop, every inch of skin he could see before she closed the sliding glass door to the deck.

If only she knew.

——

Harry was sitting at home when he got a call from a number he didn’t recognize. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence. People usually gave his number out to people who had car trouble, knowing he was reliable and could always use a bit of cash. It wasn’t something he minded, but he was exhausted tonight. Sitting down in his apartment, he exhaled slowly before clicking the green button to answer the phone.

“Hello, who’s this?” He asked gruffly, his slight agitation bleeding into his tone.

“H-Hi! I’m so sorry to call you so late, but it’s Y/N. Stacy’s mum.” She said shyly. “I’m sorry to bother you Harry, but my car… it’s not starting. I was meant to go to the grocery but it’s just making this noise and-“

His whole body shot up straight as he got confirmation as to who it was. Was it some sort of joke? Or were the angels smiling down on him for once? Any ache in his body and heaviness in his eye disappeared as he stood up from the sofa, making his way towards the door.

“M’on my way. It’s no trouble.” He said in a softer tone, thankful he had already showered. Maybe he’d need to do it again, but he wanted to look halfway decent for Y/N. “It’ll be about 15 for me to get over there.”

“Oh-are you sure?” Her voice was slightly hesitant. “You sound tired and I can order groceries if I need to, I really don’t want to put you out.”

“Promise, it’s not a big deal.” He assured her, tucking his wallet into his jeans before opening his front door. “I’d always help you with whatever you need. Didn’t mean t’’sound so grumpy, I didn’t know it was you calling.” He’d have been halfway to her house if he had known. “Give me 15 and I’ll be there.”

“As long as you’re sure.” He could tell she was doing the worried thing she usually did with her fingers touching her bottom lip. There had been a lot of silent observing on his end towards the woman and he could almost see her in his head. “I’ll make sure to make it up to you.”

Even though there was nothing suggestive in her tone, Harry could feel his prick stiffen up at the mere thought of it meaning something more. It took the whole drive there to will it down.

—-

Harry arrived to the house to see the garage doors open- and Stacy’s car gone.

Was this his divine intervention? He didn’t want to get his hopes up, but he knew she had to be gone. Harry was the one who did all the work on their cars, so it wasn’t in the shop. More than likely they’d be all alone.

The summer night was cooling off a bit but there was still a decent amount of daylight left. The stickiness had subsided and it was far more comfortable than he had been at work all day in his damn coveralls. He’d sweat up a storm and cringed the moment he’d had a moment to himself, hating how hot the garage got in the summer months. His own garages would have proper AC one day.

He was thankful for the heat though when he saw Y/N come out from the garage, her lavender dress obviously a swimsuit cover up. The straps of a bikini were underneath it, the halter top of the dress tied behind her neck. It was shorter than her normal dresses making Harry peer up at the sky and ask anyone who was up there to lend him some strength in order to not pop a stiffy in front of her- at least not yet.

“You really didn’t have to come out so quickly. I didn’t think before calling you.” Y/N crossed her arms as she walked towards the younger man who was fishing his toolbox out of the back of his pickup truck. She couldn’t help but admire how much of a man he’d truly become. Tattooed now, shown off by his black tank top. Hair a bit unruly and curled. Stubble on his upper lip and jaw. He was a man now, not a hint of boy in the slightest, and it was a little intimidating. She remembered him when he was far more lanky, 19 and shy. Now he was 23, with larger arms and broadened shoulders, a pretty set of lips and a husky voice. Things she shouldn’t have been paying attention to.

There had been a bit of tension between them somehow, tension she hadn’t been able to pinpoint where it had begun. The one thing she did know is that he was an observer. His eyes were watching her when she came out and he kept eye contact as they spoke, like he was giving her every bit of attention he had when she was talking. Maybe it was the heart sickness she felt but it was so nice to feel listened to, appreciated. Harry always helped clean up, always told her daughter to be respectful to her mum, always asked her how her day was. He was a complete gentleman every time he came over and she had to wonder how much of a problem it was for her to sort of wish for that attention all the time.

Ever since she had found out Patrick had been cheating on her, she’d felt a bit used. Dirty. Of course marrying a man 10 years her senior who was a hotshot lawyer had probably been her first sign something would go wrong, but he used to dote on her. That was until she began to age. It wasn’t like she was old- she could probably still have a kid if she wanted! But she’d gotten pregnant at 17 and Patrick had been quick to marry her on her 18th birthday. A problematic union at best, but she’d tried to be happy. She was provided for and had a beautiful home and daughter, one so smart she was able to skip around in school! But… she’d never felt truly loved. Not that toe curling, soft eyed, tummy turning love that she’d always imagined.

Not even the passion she wanted. All she wanted at this point was for someone to want her. To make a move, to show her she was sexy and prove that her newfound revelations were true.

The last three years had been tearing herself down to build back up. There was some part of her that felt 22 again, wanting to live the life she hadn’t been able to as a young mum. But that didn’t mean she had to look at Harry the way her brain was trying to.

“Stacy is at a concert a few hours away otherwise I would have just asked her to borrow her car.” Having him here now made her feel all the more ridiculous for calling him over for such a stupid reason. Tomorrow would have at least been during normal work hours.

“Y/N.” Harry’s hand rested on her shoulder, making her breath catch quietly. “S��fine. I’m more than happy to help you. Alright?” His thumb rubbed over the cuff of her shoulder before he gently lifted his hand away, carrying his toolbox further into the garage.

She felt a bit buzzed, as pathetic as it was. It had been so long since a man had touched her, let alone a younger, attractive one. It made her feel like her brain had fogged up.

“Keys in the ignition?” He murmured. “Want t’see what we’re working with.”

It was enough to shake her out of her fog, nodding a bit too eagerly as he gave her a soft smile, sitting himself in the driver’s seat. She leaned against the garage door as she watched him turn it over a few times to no avail, making her worry her bottom lip between her teeth. She had no idea about anything car related and luckily it had all been minor stuff until now. Her ex had the cars serviced every few months and she had been dropping the ball. What if it was bad? What if she needed a new engine and Harry thought she was an awful car owner? What if-

Her train of thought was snapped out of it as he let out a chuckle, standing up from the seat. “I know what it is. Isn’t a big problem at all.” He walked over to his toolbox. “Battery is dead. You may have accidentally left the key in, or a door open, maybe a light on. Not a big deal. I’ll just give it a jump.”

While he didn’t seem annoyed about it at all, Y/N felt very, very dumb. How could she have not known that’s what it was? Something so easy to fix. Her cheeks burned as she cringed, feeling the guilt well up in her body for making him come out when she could have just asked a neighbor for a jump.

It took him just a few tries with her following his instruction to turn the car on when she said so in order for her car to turn on as if nothing had happened. It was slightly humiliating.

“Oh, god… Harry, I’m so sorry.” She groaned. “I’m not… I’m not good with cars and I thought the engine was dead or something big happened to it. I made you leave your house for no reason. I can’t begin to say how awful I feel.” It felt even more embarrassing because it was such a quick fix and he was an expert in cars. She probably seemed like a bobble head.

“Woah- S’okay.” He closed the hood of her car and detached the jumper cables. “It’s actually a good thing. I’d rather it be a quick fix than something that would cost you thousands. That’s the ideal. No one is an expert in cars right away and m’sure that the whole thing was probably be a bit troubling if it’s the first time it’s happened to you.” His voice tried to soothe her worries away. The man truly looked unbothered by it all, happy to help- but still.

“Well… if you’re sure.” It still felt hot around her cheeks as she made her way towards the door leading to the kitchen. “Come inside, I’ll get you something for helping me.”

Harry let out a sigh as she waited at the door for him, tucking his toolbox and cables back into his car before following her inside. A mixture of giddiness and nerves rocked through his system as she led him towards the kitchen where her handbag was. Alone with her at last- and with a good excuse. No one would question him coming over to help with the car. Surely, Stacy had given her his number. He had every right to be here.

So why couldn’t he extend his stay?

“How much do I owe you?” Her hair fell in her face as she looked down into her bag, fishing around for her wallet. It was always a bit of a mess with receipts she needed to toss, makeup she needed to put away, a first aid kit she’d only really ever needed once- all the things making it more difficult to find her wallet. So difficult that she didn’t notice how close he got until his warm, slightly calloused hand closed over hers, gently pulling it out of the bag.

Her heart stuttered as she raised her head to look at him. Tanned skin from being out in the sun, a few freckles here and there. A birthmark near his mouth she’d never noticed. He had more scruff than the last time she had seen him too, making her mouth dry a bit as she blinked up at the man, her hand suddenly feeling much smaller in his own. He was a bit too close but there was no desire in the slightest to pull back.

“You know me a bit better than t’think that I’d charge you for a jump.” His voice was low, soft. A volume it didn’t need to be for it being just the two of them. He also didn’t need to be this close to her, close enough to smell a warm, woodsy soap on him and mint from the gum he was usually chewing. Her body felt hot under where he touched her, heartbeat quickening at his unforgiving eye contact.

“B-but you came all the way out here.” She whispered back. It wasn’t necessary to talk that low but it was following his tone, the tension palpable in the room. “I’d feel awful for making you come for nothing. I really should pay you.” His stare was intimidating but also… a bit addicting. He didn’t look away from her- no, his eyes looked over her face. Maybe she had imagined the lingering at her lips, but part of her hoped she didn’t.

“Have you had dinner yet?” His question made her slightly confused, not the response she had been expecting.

“No, why? Did you want me to cook for you?” That made her perk up a bit. She had to do something to repay him. It wouldn’t be right not to.

“No. I want t’cook for you.” His words were matter of fact. There was no way she didn’t believe his desire to do so, considering he looked so sure of himself. It just was a bit confusing. Her brows furrowed, head tilting a little as she turned more towards him- all too aware he hadn’t dropped her hand from his grip yet- giving him that questioning look. “You have the ingredients for chicken teriyaki? Rice?” When she nodded, his eyes glanced over to the pineapple in her fruit bowl. “Saw a recipe on how t’make it in a pineapple bowl. Was going to do it this weekend but I’d like to make it here. A bit more room in this kitchen and… it’d be nice to eat with someone.” He wasn’t shy about letting her know he’d like to eat with her. “May I?”

“I- I mean of course you can, but it doesn’t… how is it payment for you? For you to be the one to cook me dinner?” It was a bit hard for her to understand. She was the one who did the cooking for everyone else and it sounded like he was doing her yet another favor.

“Because you’re fun to be around, nice to talk to, I won’t have t’shop for the ingredients, and m’starving.” It was self explanatory to him. He wanted to get away with spending as much time with her as possible. Especially when she seemed to be so shocked at the idea of someone being nice to her without the thought of repayment. It sort of pissed him off. “Just sit and talk to me while I cook. It’ll be nice to hear you without people interjecting.”

Y/N hadn’t realized he had noticed that. His back was already turned, going through her fridge to get the chicken out along with some of the ingredients for the sauce but her brain was still on that. Had his shoulders always been that broad? Harry had always been quiet and observant. The nice guy, sweet and thoughtful but he didn’t seem to take any of the friend groups shit. Stacy was the youngest out of them all and he’d always been thoughtful about her. Protective over her feelings- to the point Y/N had assumed Harry had a bit of a crush on her at first. That proved to be false when she’d heard about Harry being set up with one of the mothers of the kid’s Stacy taught swim lessons to.

One of her faults was indeed being nosy, and she’d listened in on her daughter when she dropped off lunch to the pool talking to said mother. She was definitely younger than herself with a much younger child but she apparently had one good night with Harry before he politely decided not to see her again.

She wasn’t dumb. Y/N heard their teasing of Harry liking older women… and perhaps that’s why he made her a tad bit nervous. It wasn’t like he’d ever made a move, but he had a sensual air around him. He’d been gentle with her today, but never inappropriate. Was it bad to wish he would?

The answer was a resounding yes, it was not at all something she should ever want- but that didn’t mean that’s what her brain was thinking.

She pulled out a pineapple wine she’d gotten as a gift, never a more appropriate time. A glass was poured for each of them as Harry went about the motions, preparing and chopping and starting the rice. Maybe adding alcohol into the mix wasn’t the smartest idea, but she needed something to take the nervous edge off.

“Is it lonely in a big house like this?” Harry asked as he dropped the chicken into the pan. “When Stace is gone, does it feel a little daunting?”

“Sometimes.” She pursed her lips. “It’s been my house for a while now so I’m used to all the noises and I know all the neighbors. You can hear the kids playing outside, lawnmowers, or people getting home from work.‘At night it can be… it can be a bit unnerving. Cold. But Patrick was gone a lot of nights at the office, so it’s nothing I’m not used to.” A bitter scoff left her as she took a sip of wine before shaking her head, face falling. “Sorry. I know that’s the last thing you want to hear about.”

“No.” He said simply. “I’d like to. I don’t mind.” His tongue ran over his bottom lip before he met her eyes, placing his wine glass on the counter. “Everyone needs someone to vent to sometimes, Y/N. Know m’younger than you and all but I’m not clueless when it comes to relationships.” A gentle smile softened the blow of the words. “Tell me about it if you want. You don’t have to censor yourself. Not around me. It’s just us.”

There was a burn in her belly at the last few words. It felt… really fucking nice to be told that. That he wanted to earnestly hear her talk. He was an incredible listener, she found. It made her wonder how much of what she said in the past he had really heard.

“Uh… well…” twirling the glass in her hand, her fingers tightened around the stem as she had to break eye contact with him. It was making her feel a little light headed. “He was cheating, as I’m sure you know. Stacy didn’t take it well. She’d cut up all his ties by the time I found her.” Her smile quirked on her lips. Her daughter had a thirst for revenge. “It was worse when I found out it wasn’t just one person but multiple women. All at his job. It’s why he moved firms.” Her lips tightened as she looked towards the sliding glass door that was open to let the air in, the sun having started to set just a bit ago. A golden glow ran over the kitchen and she had a hard time not staring at the man in front of her.

“I… I’m not sure how much you know of myself and Patrick, but we were in a relationship when I turned 17. He was 27. I thought it was very impressive and I was so mature for my age that he chose me, but it wasn’t. It was wrong. And when I got pregnant, we had to hide it until I turned 18 and he could marry me. His parents were lovely grandparents to Stacy but awful parents to him in the way they enabled his behavior. So for a long time I just thought it was a big star crossed love story when in reality, he stole my youth from me. I don’t ever regret my daughter- don’t get me wrong.” Her look was desperate for him to believe her, but he didn’t seem to have any judgment on his face. It was a breath of fresh air considering people usually gave her pitying looks this far along.

“I love her and I wouldn’t change it. Everything happens for a reason but… I’m just a bit bitter now. My best years spent on him and he’s fucking other women because I’m ’showing my age’ and I’m essentially aged out.” Her face curled in disgust. “I work hard on my body! I keep up with my appearance! You know? I’m not lazy. I didn’t let myself go which- even if I did, that’s no fucking excuse for cheating. Marriage was supposed to be for love, for better or for worse. At least that's what I naively thought.” It had been so long since she had someone to talk to, someone who didn’t seem to fucking judge her or try and tell her it was okay. Harry merely nodded, keeping his eyes trained on her face as she got it out.

“It should be what marriage is for.” He replied in a bit of a lull. “I mean, I’ve never been married but… S’a simple enough concept to understand. I don’t think you were naive in thinking that. He was just a dick for taking advantage of you.” Harry didn’t like Patrick much from the start. He’d been a show off, obviously trying to compensate for something. He’d sort of steamrolled over things Y/N used to say, and even though he’d only seen them married for a few times he came over. It was a good thing they divorced in his humble opinion, and not just because he was a bit obsessed with the woman standing in front of him. She seemed to grow from it, her confidence rising tenfold. He’d been holding her back. “I don’t think there’s much wrong with an age gap… as long as the parties are both of legal age.” He chopped the pineapple in half, making sure to make it even. “So, m’sorry you had to go through that. Stacy is great, but I wish you didn’t have to feel that way. It’s shit.”

Y/N felt a bit validated with his words. Maybe it was the wine, but she had a feeling it was just his presence that had her relaxing. He was right on all counts, but it was a little hard to accept at times after being manipulated her whole adult life. Someone was agreeing with her that weren’t her own parents. “Thank you.” She whispered. “I’m glad at least you think so. People kept telling me that marriages have bumps in the road and I was being a bit rash, filing for divorce so quickly after I found out but… Cheating is just not something I can stomach. I think they were thinking about his money, his reputation. Cared more about how he would be seen than if I was happy. I had to do a lot of cleaning up after the divorce. Friends I had for years chose his side and… yeah. I’ve been a little lonely.” A sad laugh left her before she cleared her throat. The man probably didn’t want to hear about that. “But luckily I’ve found more fulfilling things. It’s nice when you guys come around.” Her smile grew genuinely. “I’ve always liked taking care of people. That was one perk of being in the situation I was. Being a mum was great. It’s a bit jarring now though, with her out of the house the majority of the time. So, in the long roundabout answer to your first question- yes, the big house is a bit daunting sometimes.”

Y/N had rambled and babbled. Harry had been happy to listen, attentive even while cooking. She knew she may be embarrassed later about spilling her fucking guts out to him when he had only come over to fix her not so broken car and decided he wanted to make her dinner, but it was so fucking refreshing to have someone in her kitchen with her.

It was embarrassing how much she missed male attention. She’d wanted to clench her thighs together when he grabbed her shoulder earlier and it was pathetic, but it was hard not to notice how wonderful Harry was. He was hardworking, intelligent, sweet, charitable, understanding and stupidly fucking handsome. He could cook too, apparently. Something her ex husband could never even attempt.

“Thank you for sharin’ all that with me.” His voice was even and smooth as he gave her a gentle smile. “I, for one, am glad you divorced him. I think you’re incredible. You don’t deserve someone who’ll step out on you. Let out multiple times.” It truly did piss him off. The man had a woman who was willing to give the world and still managed to be greedy for other women and fucked it up. “I’ve never really understood that sort of thing but, I think you’re too good for him anyways. Know you said you feel like you wasted your youth and by the risk of sounding a bit cliche, age is just a number in this instance. You can do anything you want now that you think you would have wanted to do back then. And..” He smirked slightly. “You look like you could still be in your twenties. So I wouldn’t worry too much about that. Him acting like aging is a sin in any situation is fucking dumb considering it’s something unavoidable and sorta beautiful if you ask me. Older, wiser, more experience. It’s a good thing. To me, at least.”

Y/N did know of his taste for older women and though she had no intention of bringing it up, she seemingly couldn’t keep her mouth shut tonight. Without permission from her mouth, the words fell out like a tumble. “Is that why you go for older women?”

The room fell silent for a minute and she could feel the return of the heat under her cheeks, eyes widening as she snapped her hand over her mouth. It wasn’t something she wanted him to know that she knew, but too fucking late now. His head tilted back up, eyes falling on her own wide ones before he let out a laugh. A reaction she hadn’t expected in the slightest. Her hand fell in a motion to try and apologize but he lifted his own to stop her, calming from the laughter as he shook his head.

“Fuck, M’sorry. I didn’t mean t’laugh, but you looked like you scared the shit out of yourself.” He giggled, running his fingers over the corners of his mouth as they curled into a smirk. “It’s fine. You don’t need to apologize. We’re both adults here.” A clear definition that he was definitely seeing himself on her level. “It’s okay t’ask me about, love. I’m fine talking about it. You just told me details about your divorce so this seems a little tame in comparison.”

As much as she hated herself for it, her stomach flipped at the term of endearment. Harry and her hadn’t spent much time alone before but he had never called her that before. Maybe it was a bit of a bond forming being alone with him. He’d always been a bit ahead of the others in terms of maturity. Not in a creepy way like Patrick used to say about her, but in a genuine hard working way. He’d taken his jobs, career, and promises seriously. It was hard not to know how reliable he was when people constantly used that word to describe him. Seeing him as more of an equal instead of his daughter’s friend was easy when they weren’t around. There was that old soul type of thing she liked.

“I obviously did not mean for that to come out of my mouth. But uh-” She ran a hand over her dress to self-soothe. “I heard them teasing about you and one of the mum’s of the kids Stacy teaches had been bragging about…” The woman didn’t need to finish her stance before Harry laughed through his nose, trying to hide his smirk.

“Ah.” He nodded, turning the heat off on the stove and pouring the sauce onto the chicken. “Yeah. I do, I’ve always preferred older women. I get teased for it but it’s just what I’m attracted to.” There was that thought in his mind though, wondering what the woman had been bragging about. He’d sure as hell fucked her well and thoroughly, but at the end of it he had opened his eyes and it wasn’t Y/N. It’s his common problem these days. Falling out of interest when he realized he was chasing a feeling from people that weren’t the object of his affections. “I went out with her once… went back to her place.” He shrugged. “It was alright. I was pretty up front about not being sure we clicked but she wanted me to come in, so…” He shrugged. The girl didn’t seem to have hard feelings when she texted him a few days later asking for a repeat and he declined because he was going to be here for a get together.

“Can I ask why?” Morbid curiosity, that’s what she would call it. It was killing her since she had found out though. Why does a young man, almost in his prime, go for older women specifically? Not that she didn’t think they weren’t worth that, but it wasn’t the norm. “If it’s not too personal.”

“You can get personal with me, Y/N. I don’t mind.” He clarified, dishing some rice into the pineapple bowls he’d carved out. “I think there’s a few aspects to it but I appreciate maturity. One of my first experiences was with someone a few years older than me and it kept going from there. I enjoy intelligent conversation. Someone who can keep up and not just talk about the things girls my age talk about. Nothing wrong with them at all, but every time I’ve tried dating someone my age it’s fallen flat. I enjoy dates at nice restaurants or at home. Cooking for them, listening to music. I work a lot, I’m not much for clubs. Even pub crawls have been a lot for me at times considering I work at a bar on the weekends, work all day in a garage. People my age don’t usually seem to understand or appreciate my work ethic but.. I want a house like this one day.” He motioned around the kitchen. “I’ve been saving loads of money, staying in my apartment and making sure I don’t spend crazily. I’ve always been a bit of a romantic, so I want t’provide for someone one day. Maybe that’s a little old fashioned but It’s fulfilling to me. Want to open my own garage, maybe multiple and… I dunno, older women have always been more receptive to my plans, to the way I am. And I’m not a huge texter. I like phone calls, seeing someone in person. Dating my age is a lot of that.”

It wasn’t a shock to her that his ethics would be a turn off for younger women who sometimes got a bit in their head about the attention they needed. It wasn’t a drag or anything of that nature, but a lot of younger women relied on that sort of thing. Texting all day that he obviously wouldn’t be able to do. They deserved the relationships they wanted but so did Harry. It was a surprisingly nice answer from him. He had lots of decent reasons that made her feel a little more intrigued than she should be, but she couldn’t help it. The man was alluring.

“And… permission to overshare a little bit?” He asked, wanting to test the waters. Y/N looked intrigued, nodding as she leaned on the counter. “Older women tend to be a bit more.. Compatible with me sexually. A bit more eager. Some are experienced but it isn’t really about that, it’s about knowing what you want. Being a little less shy in asking for what they want. Everyone’s different of course, but I find that a disappointing amount of men aren’t giving women what they want, and I’ve been happy to provide that. I’m a giver, it’s what I like. So…” His pink tongue ran over his bottom lip as he kept eye contact with her. “There’s that aspect of it too.”

Y/N could feel the slight throb between her legs as he spoke. There was no hint of shyness in his face as he spoke to her, just matter of fact. He had no shame, if anything he seemed.. A little smug. Something that oddly made her stomach flip and flutter as he pushed her plate towards her and settled on the opposite side of the island, sitting on the stool.

“I.. I can see that.” She murmured, knowing she must look a little flustered. Considering it had been years since she’d had sex, just the way he was looking at her was working her up a bit further than she would ever want to admit. “I think..” If he was oversharing, maybe she should too. Or maybe that was the slight buzz the wine had provided. “I’m still trying to learn what it is I want. I was only with one person my whole life and then… After the divorce I had a one night stand and it was not at all satisfying. I’ve meant to try and go on dates more often but the few I’ve been on just didn’t feel right.” It wasn’t something she talked about often at all. She had her two girlfriends she talked to about sex- or lack thereof- and the toys they got in order to satisfy what their dates couldn’t.

This little tidbit had Harry leaning in a bit closer, chewing the first bite of his food. It was surprisingly good for a recipe he’d found on a social media site, but he was far more interested in what Y/N had to say. “I mean it’s only natural, isn’t it? To be curious?” He waved his fork in the air. “Was he satisfying you in your marriage?” The look on her face was all he needed to see for an answer. Her lips pulled in and her gaze averted, he did feel a seedling of pity for the woman- but hope for himself. One man’s loss was another’s gain, wasn’t it? He would be able to actually pleasure her. He knew he could. He hadn’t failed yet, and there were genuine feelings there for her so… he had a lot of faith he’d be willing and able to please her. Half of the battle was just listening to her. Knowing what she wanted. “It’s okay, I can tell what your answer is. But m’sorry to hear that.” He frowned. “You deserved better than all of that. I know you don’t need me to tell you that, but you deserved a hell of a lot more for what he put you through.” Personally, Harry would never drop the ball like that.

Realistically, Y/N was his dream woman and this was without knowing what she liked in bed. Everything about her was perfect to him, all except the pesky fact that she was the mother of one of his friends- but honestly? He was willing to risk it. She was worth that sort of risk. She had the demeanor, the charm, the intelligence, and so far, the sort of lifepath that aligned with him. He had to talk his way into it a little bit more than likely, but he was ready to try.

“Thank you, Harry.” Y/N knew she probably looked a little flustered. She was. He was saying all the right things and she felt a weird level of comfort with him that she hadn’t experienced before. He was a man. Maybe he was younger than her, but he had a level head. He could cook. He worked multiple job, had ambitions, he knew what he wanted and he wanted to be a provider. Something that she found to be overwhelmingly sexy. She was noticing him in less than appropriate ways more and more. Like how cut his jaw was as he chewed his food, the scruff on his face, his strong, big hands. So fucking big, making the fork he held look small. His arms were built, flexing as he leaned against the countertop. The memory of his broad shoulders wasn’t too far from her brain either. “You’re… I haven’t spoken to a lot of people about that stuff. I don’t mean to take up too much of your time tonight, I know you must be tired after work but… I really appreciate you coming here, fixing my car, cooking. Talking to me. You’re great company.”

“Like I said earlier, I like being around you.” It felt like he could see into her soul. Green peering inside of her, spreading her open. “If m’being honest, there aren’t many other places I’d rather be. M’happy to help you with whatever you need.”

If Y/N was crazy, she’d think it was a double meaning. She’d overthink and imagine that he was implying something not so appropriate. Things that had her tummy flipping and cunt weeping. Pathetic, she knew that. Here she was, lusting after the younger man as he stared at her from across her kitchen. The sun had now set and the darkness was beginning to set in, and she wanted more than anything to take his hand and drag him upstairs to her bedroom but she had to clear her brain before she did something rash. “I enjoy spending time with you too.” Her smile was soft as she took her plate and brought it to the sink. “Just let me clean these dishes and then I’ll walk you to your car. You’ve been such a help tonight.”

Y/N felt a little shaky as she turned the water on and let it run over the dirty pan and the other dishes she hadn’t quite gotten to. As much as washing dishes was something people usually hated, the girl found it a little therapeutic. She’d just gotten into it, relaxing just a bit when she felt a hand curl around her hip, a cleared plate set into the sink and the other hand shutting the water off on her. “What-”

“I think we’re dancing around it now, Sweetheart.” He said lowly, cuffing his other hand on her waist. Her body stilled as he pressed himself into her, his confidence high as he watched her shaky hand drop the sponge. “I think there’s something we both want and you don’t know how to ask for. And that’s okay.” His nose brushed the shell of her ear as she closed her eyes, swallowing thickly. “I know that you haven't been taken care of. I know you weren’t satisfied in the ways you deserved. I meant it when I said that there’s nowhere else I’d rather be. Y’know that, right?”

“Harry, what are you doing?” Her voice was breathy as she clenched her over the counter but making no move to leave his grip.

“I’ve been after you for a while, Y/N. I think you pretend to not notice how I look at you. I think… you were a little jealous when you found out I took that mum from the swim group out and fucked her, because you wanted it to be you. But let me assure you… I wanted it to be you, too.” His heat spread along her back as his fingers moved to splay over her tummy, the same tummy that was a mess of butterflies just under his fingertips.

“You did?” While she should have been shutting this down considering this man was friends with her daughter… she couldn’t. Not when he was making her feel more listened to, more desired, more aroused than she had been since… well, possibly her whole life.

“Of course, love. To be honest, I was tryin’ to give you time to adjust. To be single, to find more of yourself. You’ve blossomed so much since I’ve known you. I knew you’d probably want t’reject me because of how you know me, but I just need a chance to prove to you that I can be what you need.” The chills on her skin were unavoidable as his lips smeared over her neck, groaning quietly as he inhaled. “You smell so fucking good, y’know that? Makes me crazy. No one else smells like you… I knew touching you would ruin me.” He pulled her further into him, laying the first kiss on the hinge of her jaw. “I’d be fucked. But I’ve been fucked for a while now. No distraction took away from the fact that any body under mine wasn’t you. Wasn’t the voice I wanted saying my name. I just want to show you that m’worth the risk.”

The low baritone of his voice was making her want to whimper. Soft, hot lips pressed a trail of gentle kisses down her throat that got progressively more wet, making her cunt follow. Leaning back into him, it was hard to fight when her body felt like it needed him. His hand pressing on her stomach, pushing her all the way back until she felt him. Her gasp was wet, a chuckle vibrated against her throat as he ground himself against her ass.

“I’d fill you up. Make you feel it all the way in here.” The pressure on her stomach suddenly made a flash of heat boil in her belly, imagining it. Craving it. It always felt like something was missing during sex anyways. “I know you need it. You need someone to worship you, to make you understand just how irresistible you are. I’ve been dying to do that for you. Makes me so fucking angry t’know the people who’ve had you haven’t pleasured you, made you unsatisfied while I was dreaming about just a fucking lick of you. Just a squeeze.” Her hand fell on top of his own, breathing a bit more labored as the length of him against her ass taunted her further.

“You were?” The woman knew she probably sounded a bit wrecked but she was. Harry was making her needy, desperation filling her chest in a way that almost overwhelmed her. She was hungry for more, more of his touch, his lips, his confessions.

“Mhm. Had t’get my fill in those little touches you’d give me. Running you hand over my back, brushing past me in the kitchen, grabbing my hand. I’ve been wanting to hold you like this. Kiss you until you can't breathe. Make you cum on my fingers, my tongue, my cock, make you melt just for me. S’that something you’d want, baby?” His teeth grazed her jaw getting a little whimper from her throat. “Hm? I’d like some words from you. I don’t mind doin’ most of the talking, but don’t leave me hanging.”

“I would- yeah. I would like that.” She was indeed panting. If she was a different woman she’d probably be ashamed over how much she was actually gagging for it, but there was something that made her truly believe that Harry could back up every single claim he said. “I haven’t been touched in so long but… you’ve made me feel so good already.” The admission made him smile against her skin, she could feel it. “Is this- do you just want sex?”

“No.” Her neck felt cold as he pulled away, manhandling her a bit and making her enjoy it far too much as she was turned and reversed in position to be facing him now. Her chin was grabbed between his fingers and his now dark eyes pinned her own. “S’not just a fuck to me. I like you, Y/N. Know it’ll be a little complicated considering the situation but to put it bluntly, I don’t give a fuck.” There was no room left for doubt with his words. “I want you. I’ve wanted you for fucking years, and unless you don’t want me, there’s nothing and no one else that’s gonna keep me from getting what I want.” When she failed to reply, he coaxed it from her. “C’mon, baby. Words.”

“I-I want that. I just didn’t know it was so serious for you.” She felt her cheeks flush at the intensity of it all. “It’s a good thing though… You’re making me a little dizzy.”

“Yeah?” He crooned. “A little dizzy? So fucking cute. I intend to do more than that, though.” Without another word, he took her mouth. Took it like he owned it, kissed her like it was already his.

Y/N melted into it immediately. Fell into the kiss and clutched his shirt to pull him closer as he made her brain empty of any thoughts but ones pertaining to him. How big his hands were, how easily he moved her around, how soft his lips were, how he tasted, the slight smell of motor oil underlying the fresh, clean smell that followed him over here. It was pathetic, maybe, to completely resign herself, to hand herself over to the younger man but… could anyone blame her?

Yes, he was younger. But he kissed like he had been hand plucked to be attached to her lips. His tongue brushed into her mouth and she moaned out loud, allowing him to kiss her any way he wanted. Y/N was touch starved and she knew it, but there was something electric about the way he held her. The way he kissed like he was starving, like he couldn’t get enough of her. His hand slipped down her back and greedily palmed her ass, squeezing it tight enough to make her whimper. It had been so fucking long since someone touched her like they knew what they were doing, like they knew what to do to make her feel good. Harry acted like she belonged to him already, pulling her leg up over his waist as he pressed her into the counter. “Hop up.” he whispered against her lips, using his hands to cuff her waist and tug her right up on the countertop.

Immediately her legs were spread and his body was between them. While he was somewhat lean, he was broad. His arms were big, his hands were too. She had to spread a bit and let her dress ride up as he manhandled her, yanking her back so she was right up against him. The sweetest whimper left her lips and translated to his, making him pull back to look down at her. Her smeared lip gloss and wide, glossy eyes looking up at him. Hair a little messy when it was usually styled, she looked… alive. The way he wanted her to feel with him. “M’gonna spread you open and get a taste, because I’ve been fucking dying for it for years.” He told her bluntly. “But just a taste. I’ll spend hours between these perfect damn thighs tonight… but I need to be inside of you.” He felt like he toed the line between unhinged and the most control he ever had. The man knew what he wanted, he told her what she was going to get, and yet he felt like he had never been more passionate about something in his life. Finally getting the chance to be with the woman he wanted was something that he had been counting down the days for. Nothing could stop him from doing this.

“Yes, please. I want you… I want you to take over.” She swallowed. It wasn’t always this way. Sometimes Y/N enjoyed the idea of being on top, enjoyed teasing, enjoyed the thought of being in charge for a little bit- but never in her life had she wanted a man to just do whatever the fuck he wanted. It was because she knew he would know how to please her.

That assumption wasn’t wrong.

Seeing the man get on his knees in front of the counter, ordering her to take the dress off and toss it to the side to expose her plain cotton bra and underwear, maybe she should feel a little apprehensive- but the only thing she felt was needy. Desperate. Wanted. The look in his eye told her that he wanted her and he wanted her more desperately than she even knew. His lips kissed over her knees and upper thighs, obviously pacing himself as his fingers tugged the waistband of her panties and slowly peeled them off her body.

Harry wished he spent a bit more time admiring her. He wished he had the self control at this point to not just pull her to the edge of the counter and take a thick lick over her glistening cunt and nuzzle his face into it regardless of the fact he was getting wet- but he didn’t. He pulled her up and onto his tongue, getting the delicious little gasp he had been dying to hear. Manicured nails gripped the countertop behind her and buried in his hair, wet gasps leaving her mouth. Garbles of his name and calling to god, but he was busy. Getting her flavor on every inch of his taste buds and committing it to memory, dipping his tongue into her entrance and lapping up to her clit where he sucked lightly, he was self serving. This was for him and she was reaping the benefits.

“Oh my f-fucking god.” Y/N said in disbelief, watching green meet her eyes as his nose nudged her clit. “Oh, you’re so fucking good, Harry. Holy fuck.” It was hard to comprehend that this man was on his knees for her when just a few nights ago he had been helping her set out snacks for their friend group as they had a hang out at the pool. Seeing him as the man he was, she couldn’t believe she’d never seen him in this light- not seriously. He had completely blown her expectations out of the water as his tongue flicked over her entrance, pressing against it and making her curse repeatedly.

The sound of a belt clanking on the floor was mostly ignored- but his fingers inside of her weren’t. In fact, she teared up slightly at the feeling. “Yes, fucking… finger me, feel me.” She growled, her thighs pressing him closer. He had no problems, humming against her as he played with her clit and opened her up with his fingers- surely for her benefit considering he had felt quite impressive against her ass. “Shit, I can’t believe this.” The laugh was quickly melded into a moan as he pulled her clit back into his mouth and added a second finger.

Harry shook his head into her cunt. He felt her clench around his fingers and the sounds of pleasure above him, and he didn't want to stop but if he didn’t, he was positive he was going to blow his load all over the kitchen floor. There was no bothering to wipe his chin as he stood back up, gripping her face for another deep kiss. “M’obsessed. Tastes even better than I expected… You’re never going to get me away from it.” He wasn’t even joking. He would gladly call off his shift from the bar tomorrow if it meant getting to spend that time tasting her. “But I need to get inside of you. I need to make you cum around my cock.” He went to get his wallet from his pocket but was surprised when she stopped him.

“I’m clean. I’ve- I’ve been tested and I’m on birth control-” Harr interrupted her with a loud groan, fisting his cock in his hand as his pants fell to his ankles.

“Thank fuck.” He laughed. “This may be over quickly, but this isn’t the last time I’m in you. I want to make you cum over and fucking over- but I don’t want to waste my load on the floor when it’s better suited inside of you.” He watched her to answer, but he was pushing in before she got a word in.

“Oh- shit.” Y/N clutched him, looking at him with wide eyes as he sunk into her. Mouth hanging open, she adjusted to the stretch as his head dropped against hers and he kept her eye contact as he sunk in inch by inch. Their breathing mingling as the feeling encompassed both of them. “Oh my god- you’re so fucking big.” Her voice was unfamiliar to herself, sulky and whiny with the pleasure she felt from being stretched.

“I know, baby.” He grinned, holding on to the nape of her neck. “You’ll get used to it.” Without another word, he pulled out to thrust back in. The process was repeated as her hot, slippery cunt clenched around his cock and tried desperately not to give it up each and every time.

It was, again, better than he imagined. Nothing could have prepared him for how good it would be to sink into the perfect hole, how she would grip him and suck in deeper. How she’d soak him and how her fingers would dig into his arm, how all he’d be able to see and smell and taste was her. It completely engulfed him and he had no urge to do anything but stay right here. “Okay?” He checked on her as he ground himself into her, her clit brushing over the hair right above his cock and getting it wet.

“I’m so good.” She slurred, lost in how good it felt to have him inside of her. “I’m so full.” It was insane to her, knowing how she had been treated last time. Even with his direct approach, she’d never felt more cared for, more appreciated. He was working with her, checking in, all while making the first moves that made her feel like he had been hand made for her. “Go harder. I can take it.”

Y/N had never been fucked the way she wanted and that had been apparent to Harry. He just had a feeling and he knew that she was going to need him in ways she hadn’t experienced. Ways he was more than happy to deliver. “I’ll give you anything you want, Baby.” His nose brushed against hers. “Just make sure to scream my name nice n’loud when you cum for me.”

It was unlike sex that she thought was real. Y/N held on to Harry as he plowed into her, his grip on her tight as his eyes looked down at where they were connected. It was wet, so fucking wet and creamy all over the base of his cock that she hadn’t known she could do. Her thighs were spread out and over his forearms as he fucked into her like it was his one and only job, whimpering out his name as he gave it to her the way she’d needed. “I knew you’d b-be able to give me what I wanted.” Her words were jostled as her body was, but he replied with another hot kiss.

Messy, full of tongue and wet, she relished in his desperate need to taste her again. It didn’t matter that her chin was wet or she was getting bruised on her hips, she’d finally felt fulfilled in sex. “Yeah? Y’knew I’d be able to give it to you?” He crooned. “M’glad you knew, because I plan on being the only one doing it.” The words were completely serious and possessive and Y/N loved it. Feeling this level of desire was brand new to her and she didn’t want to give it up.

“Uh-huh, I- I want you to be the one to give it to me.” As wrong as some people may see it, this was the epitome of a man. Even if he was younger- he had a plan, he had two jobs he’d held for years, a place of his own… He had more than some people her own age. Dedication and loyalty like his were irreplaceable. Maybe she was crazy in indulging in this, in allowing him to have her, but after wasting years with a man who didn’t want her- she wasn’t going to turn away someone who obviously desired her, wanted to worship her- and made her feel like she wanted to do the same back.

“Good. I wasn’t planning on letting anyone else get a taste. You’re going to be my woman, this is going to be my pussy, M’gonna keep making you feel good. I don’t care who has shit to say about it.” He grunted, pressing theirs mouths together again as he felt her get close. The rippling around his cock and her soft whimpers against his mouth, her hand gripping him hard, he was close to finally fulfilling his fantasy. His dream girl letting go around him and making a mess. “I can feel it, y’know. Feel how you’re gonna cum for me.” He panted against her mouth.

Y/N felt lightheaded in the best way, her body tingling and the pressure in her stomach building with each scrape of his tip against the spot no one else had reached- or even bothered to look for. Harry was perceptive and keen on her, about to make her orgasm from penetration for the very first time. In all her years she had thought something was wrong, but it turned out that she’d just been with shit people. Her ex husband, the attempts at hook ups, they had no idea how to work her body… But Harry? It seemed like he’d written the manual from the first time he touched her. The only thing she could think about was the pleasure and how good he looked giving it to her.

Lips swollen and teeth grit, vein on his neck visible, his arms flexed as he railed her. It was like fucking her was his purpose, and fuck- he was fulfilling it. “I am.” She breathed, the tension getting tighter in her stomach. Again, those tears rose in her eyes as each thrust jolted the pleasure inside of her. “I am, I’m gonna cum for you Harry.” Remembering at the last minute that he wanted her to say his name, she sure as hell gave it to him. “Please, Harry…. Just keep fucking me, give it to me, you’re right where I n-need.” It was right there, she could fucking taste it. “Harry, Harry-”

“Cum for me.” He coaxed. “C’mon, baby. First of many, show me how you cum on my cock. Get me nice and wet- fuck, you’re gorgeous.” The man was in awe of how beautiful she was, but even more about how good it felt as she began to finish on his prick. Her mouth dropping and her eyes watering as she let out a slew of cusses, the quivering of her cunt making it hard to hold on. “Fucking beautiful, that’s my girl. F-Fuck.”

Y/N felt like she was floating. Pleasure hit every nerve, white hot and tingling. She had no idea what was coming out of her mouth but she felt the burn in her eyes as a tear fell down her cheek, clinging to him as each thrust got that sweet spot and made her tremble in his arms. He didn’t stop, the dark noises he made only spurring her on further. She was wet and she knew she must have completely soaked him. The wet sounds had gotten louder and the way he had groaned let her know she had to have gushed around his cock. “Harry, Harry- H, oh my god.” She bleated, nails digging into his arm. The constant stimulation was only making her more wet and he seemed to be loving it.

Harry was drunk on the feeling, his own orgasm trailing right behind hers as he worked her through it. She’d made a mess, one he was happy to have all over his skin. The scent of her on him would be his reward, her marks even more so. “M’gonna cum.” He growled. “Where? Where do y’want my cum, baby? Tell me where you want it.”

“Inside. Inside me, please, give it to me there.” Her legs wrapped around him tighter, making it nearly impossible for him to pull out- like he’d ever want to. His balls tightened at the words, eyes blazing as he looked down at her face. She seemed just as far gone as him, the suction of her soaked channel making him feel borderline insane.

“You- Fuck, Yeah? You want me to give you my load in that perfect cunt?” His grip on her tightened, sure to leave bruises but that was a problem for a later time. It had been a fantasy of his forever, his spunk dripping from her swollen pussy and now she wanted it- was begging for it. There was no mistaking her rapid nod, head tipped up at him as she whispered ‘please, please, please, give it to me’ and fuck, Harry was only so strong.

He did exactly as asked, his sloppy thrusts hard as he grunted while coming to his end. It flashed over his vision as the loudest groan left his swollen lips, hips stuttering as he buried deep and let loose. Spurts of cum leaving his tip as he unloaded inside of her, the pulsing of his prick felt by both of them as he emptied his balls of every drop of cum. Claiming her, marking her in a symbolic way and the way he’d always been desperate to do.

There was little hesitation as he took her mouth again, giving her a deep kiss. Tongue running over the roof of her mouth before sucking on her tongue, the most unhinged kiss he’d felt in his life as she clung to him and her cunt continued to milk him of every little bit. “Fuck.” He laughed in disbelief against her mouth. He was coated in a light sheen of sweat, Y/N’s hair was a mess and he was still snugly wrapped up in her as he gently moved her back so she was more comfortable on the counter. His hand came up to stroke her cheek, watching her hazy eyes look back into his own. This was his wet dream come true, but Y/N had no idea the man she had just unleashed. He was just… happy. Satisfied, motivated and fucking happy. This wasn’t just a fuck for him. “Meant what I said.” His voice was hoarse as he fawned over her, adjusting her hair so it didn’t stick to her forehead. “M’gonna keep you. This isn’t a one and done and I plan on treating you the way you’ve always fuckin’ deserved.” His lips sampled hers again, feeling her arms come up over his shoulders as she reciprocated. “You’re my dream woman, Y/N. M’gonna make sure m’your dream man.”

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megwritesriddles · 2 months ago

Text

Tied to You ༊*·˚

18+ MDNI !!!

Pairing: Young! Severus Snape x Fem! Reader / You

Summary: Kinktober 2024 Day 14 - Praise & Bondage. Severus has a girlfriend and he's about as shocked as anyone about it. She brings something out in him, something loving, something experimental, but also something slightly more sinister.

Tags: Praise kink, Light bondage, Fingering, Dom!Severus, Lots of praise, Good girl, Reader is referred to as a girl a LOT, Established relationship (kinda?), Getting together, Fluff, Red flags, Possessive behaviour, Unhealthy/Toxic relationship dynamic forming, Ambiguous ending (kinda).

Word count: 3.6k

Read it on ao3! | Masterlist

Authors note: I can't write Severus as anything other than at least a bit of a creepy little freak, even though this is mostly normal and fluffy!! Again this includes a lot of unnecessary backstory to set the scene!! Hope you like it anyway mwah ( ◕◡◕)っ ♡

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Being in a relationship was a very novel concept to Severus. It wasn’t something he’d ever really thought would happen to him until recently. Sure, he’d daydreamed about it throughout his life to various degrees, but he’d always resigned himself to the fact that daydreams would be the closest he would get. However, you were very real. He’d known of you since the first year, being in his same year group he was bound to have heard your name a few times, whether on registers or from overheard gossip at the Slytherin table.

He’d never thought of you very much at all until the sixth year when you were in the same advanced potions class as him. The class was much smaller than in previous years, full of only the highest achievers in the subject in the O.W.L.s and this is where he noticed you. You were on the quieter side in class, but whenever you were called on, you gave the correct answers. You were obviously intelligent, especially at this subject, which intrigued him as a bit of a ‘swot’ as his few friends called him. He liked that you cared about studying, much more than most of your peers seemed to. It was also quite obvious even by a glance that you were a pretty girl. Once he’d started paying a little more attention to you, he’d overheard many unsavoury comments about you by his peers, about what they might like to do to you. But, you kept yourself to yourself, frequently kindly (but firmly) turning down boys who tried to flirt with you. He admired that you weren’t above a little threat against the boys who couldn’t hear the word ‘no’. Despite your withdrawn nature, you were well known as a member of the duelling club, a high achieving one at that, and so often were able to threaten the boys into backing off.

All sixth year he’d silently admired you. When the seventh year began, he told himself he’d let go of it and focus solely on his studies, but he’d never been less focused in his life. All the feelings he’d harboured for Lily for so long latched themselves onto you, becoming much larger and more consuming. They felt like a frightening entity on their own, following him around everywhere he went, trying to pounce on you whenever you’d make small talk with him before class in the corridor, or seek him out for advice on your potions homework, even though you always seemed to actually know what you were talking about. He should have realised something was odd about this, but he was too blinded by self-hatred to see the woods from the trees. So when you confessed to having feelings for him, he’d initially just sat and stared silently at you.

You’d caught him in the library, as you had taken to doing often lately and asked to sit. He’d agreed, expecting another odd question about the homework but instead, you’d sat there chewing your lip. His eyes had strayed down to the sight a few too many times, no matter how he tried to control himself. He watched as the corners of your lips tugged up a little.

“I have a crush on you, Severus,” you’d admitted with a shaky breath. He’d just blinked at you. “Well… crush sounds so juvenile… I fancy you? I have… feelings for you?” you continued on. “I just figured I ought to say something before it’s too late, you know?”

And that’s how he’d ended up in a relationship with you. He was so shocked at the time that he can't even remember what he’d said to you in response, and it was too late to ask. Whatever it was, it had clearly worked, as you had pulled him into a hug and kissed his cheek and the next weekend, he was waiting for you at the Three Broomsticks. By the end of that evening, you’d been sitting in his lap and kissing him with a passion he had never even seen, let alone felt for himself, his arms around your waist, touching you gingerly.

The entire school was baffled by your relationship. His friends and even several strangers asked him how the hell he had managed to ensnare you and he had no answer for any of them even if he wanted to, he couldn’t understand it either. One day he believes he will never be in a relationship in his life, and the next, the most beautiful girl in all of Hogwarts is hanging off of his arm for all to see. He’s surprised how unashamed you are, not only to be dating him but with public displays of affection. You always hook your arm around his as you walk, kiss his cheek as a goodbye, sit in his lap in the library and sneak his hand up your thigh. Sex. That’s the part of all this that seems the craziest to him because all of a sudden he has an active sex life. You’re all over him, and as much as it makes his head spin, he’s always willing to indulge you.

The first time you’d brought him into your dorm, he hadn’t known what was going on until you were stripping him down. Of course, you’d asked him several times if you could proceed, but he had just blindly agreed because he would let you do anything. He hadn’t told you he was a virgin until after you were done, even though he knew you knew, if from nothing else, from his very speedy performance. You’d been very sweet about it, as you were about everything, and snuggled up to him, falling asleep in his arms. No one had ever felt so safe around him before. He wanted desperately to keep you in his arms forever, and when you got up in the morning, he almost held you hostage but ended up playing it off as a joke. You’d just giggled at him and told him he’d be the cutest captor in the world, which he laughed off, but the thought crossed his mind.

He was having the most sex out of everyone in his dorm, which would have been completely unfathomable only a few months ago. It surprised him how voracious you were, you’d always seemed rather meek, yet you were dragging him away at least once a day if not more. It was a surprise that he loved. You’d created a monster, a monster that constantly loomed over his time with you. He wasn’t sure how he would ever cope if this relationship ended, not only emotionally, but also having gotten used to such frequent sexual activity. There was hardly anyone else who would ever be willing to indulge him, and you loved to, which made it a thousand times better. He felt desirable to you, a feeling he’d been inadvertently chasing his entire life. He was never going to let you go. Ever.

You didn’t seem to realise how serious he was when he told you as such. You’d giggle and peck his cheeks and tell him in a sweet little voice that you’d never let him go either, but he knew you didn’t mean it quite like he did. You enjoyed his possessive streak, loving the way his arm would slip around you when a boy would stare, marking you all over as his. As baffling as it was to everyone, there was no confusion about the fact you were taken, constantly covered in little lovebites, his hands on you whenever they could be. He’d adjust your skirts and button up your tops, softly whispering how this skin was for his eyes only now. As he gained more confidence in public displays of affection with you, he’d grip your thigh in a possessive gesture under the table, and kiss at your neck in front of others, a reminder of who left those marks there.

Severus was always up for anything that you recommended in the bedroom, surprisingly experimental despite his rigid routines during the day. You played around often, trying new things, different dynamics, different positions, and introducing various aids. As time went on, you could tell he was coming into himself as a more dominant presence, his initial nerves and shyness wearing off as he got used to you and the idea that you truly did like him and desired him. You were happy to submit to him and let yourself go with whatever he wanted from you. Every part of him was long and lithe and elegant, exploring parts of you that had never been touched before, deep within you. He loved to watch you come undone, taking immense satisfaction in the knowledge of his effects on you, effects he thought he’d never have on anyone. He worships you in the most sinful ways, and you worship him in return. Your roommates all hate the both of you, no matter how many silencing charms you cast.

You’re a little anxious when Severus heads to Hogsmeade alone one weekend, no matter how much he insists he’s only buying you a present. You’ve barely been apart for more than classes since your relationship began, and while you doubt he’s off cheating on you, the distance still makes you unreasonably anxious. You pounce on him when he returns, telling him how much you missed him, not spotting his smug smile against your shoulder. He rubs your back and assures you he felt similarly while he was away, which he did, he’d been desperate to get back to you, for many reasons. He gives you a little box, housing a little silver necklace that he’d gone to fetch from Hogsmeade for you. It has a little ‘S’ as the pendant, his initial, another means with which to stake claim over you. He clasps it behind your neck and you’re all smiles as you declare how much you love it. Then you notice another little bag.

“Is that for your other girlfriend?” you joke, pouting a little. He laughs, kissing your cheek.

“No, it’s for you my love, but we have to be alone for me to show you,” he guides you up to his dorm which is currently empty, most of his dormmates now avoid the space whenever they can because of the two of you. He brings you to his bed to sit in his lap and closes the curtains around you. You giggle, fascinated to see what he’s got, already making a few mental guesses.

Although it hadn’t popped into your head as a guess, the small spool of rope makes sense as he pulls it from the bag. He explains that it’s a soft cotton material that is both sturdy and comfortable. He doesn’t have to tell you what it’s for, you already know, and you’re willing to give it a go, the idea already exciting you a little. He can tell from the way you begin to rub your thighs together slightly. He’s become fluent in your body language over the course of your relationship, by now he’s sure he could write the dictionary. He grins at you.

“So sweet already getting all excited,” he whispers, his voice deep and silky. You love the authoritative tone he uses to speak to you when he wants to be in charge like this, it makes your thighs clench even more. “Now come on, my love, how would you like your hands tied?” he enquires softly, rubbing a hand over your thigh. After a short period of deliberation between the two of you, he lies you down against the bed and starts slowly popping open the buttons of your shirt one by one, making his way down to untuck it from your skirt. He pushes the shirt open and down, palms smoothing over your bare shoulders. You sit up for a moment to let the shirt fall away completely and so that he can reach around you to unhook your bra more easily. Once he’s pulled the bra away from you, you lie back down. “Good girl, my beautiful girl,” he praises, gently folding your shirt up and placing it onto the ground, then setting your bra on top of it. He taps your hips, urging you to lift them, gently sliding down your skirt, followed by your underwear. His need for you is mounting, folding these items a little more haphazardly before he places them on the ground by the others. He gently holds your legs apart, rubbing a hand up and down your thighs. “You like the idea of being tied up for me?” he chuckles, seeing you already glistening with want. You nod and he hums. “Aren’t you just perfect? My perfect girl,” he coos, leaning down to pepper kisses on your stomach for a moment before sitting back up. You watch him eagerly, yearning for him to give you what you want. He takes a gentle hold of your wrists and lifts them over your head, reaching for the length of rope. “Is this alright? Your arms aren’t stretching too much?”

“No, it’s fine,” you assure, watching as he starts carefully threading the rope around your wrists in figure-eights.

“I read up on how to do this, let’s hope I get it on the first try,” he smiles down at you. You giggle in return. He fusses for a little while, adjusting and readjusting so it’s not too tight, but that you can’t slip out of the restraints either. You’re sure he’s being a perfectionist about it like he is about most things, so you wait patiently. Once he’s happy, he sits back and looks at you, in all your naked glory, lying there tied up and waiting for him. He shivers and groans. “Merlin… You look like an angel, my beautiful perfect girl,” he leans down and leaves open-mouthed kisses along your neck, reinforcing several fading hickies he’s left on you before. You moan softly and squirm beneath him, pulling at your restraints without meaning to, feeling the need to touch him. You’re surprised how quickly you feel the need to use your hands and he just smirks at you. “Be good for me and don’t fight your restraints, won’t you?” he murmurs. You nod weakly, ceasing your movements and taking a deep breath, forcing yourself to relax as his lips and hands explore your body at a torturous pace. His lips kiss patterns around and between your breasts slowly, leaving a litany of little marks behind to mark his territory, his hands slowly sliding up and down your hips and waist. “Your body is absolutely exquisite, I don’t tell you that enough, my love, sculpted by the gods, all for me,” he mutters against your skin, sucking another lovebite into the side of your breast. The praise flusters you, part of you wants to argue, but you adore the idea of him truly seeing you that way, and you believe he does. He continues to press deliberate kisses across your chest, his eyes shut in prayer. His hands brush your stomach, teasing you by skimming low and withdrawing. You sigh needily and feel him nip your skin in response. “Tell me what you want,” he orders softly.

“I want your fingers inside me,” you answer breathily, writhing a little but making sure to keep your hands still. You feel him smile and nip the skin of your sternum, by your fluttering heart.

“That’s my girl, always so direct,” he chuckles, sitting up and spreading your legs once more. He gasps softly. “Oh… you must really be liking being at my mercy, hm? Dripping wet for me,” he smiles, rubbing the soft skin of your inner thigh. His genuine smile is a rarity, he’s usually so stoic and serious, that the sight of it makes you whimper for him. Oh, how crazy he drives you. “Shhh, wait like a good girl, I know you can wait, you’re more than capable,” you pout up at him and he smiles again.“Those perfect pouty lips,” he leans down and gives you a soft sensual kiss, his fingertips tracing patterns up your thigh as he kisses you. You want to wrap your arms around him, to slide your hand in his trousers, but instead, you pull pathetically at your ropes for a moment before giving up and focusing on kissing him. His fingers nudge gently at your folds, making you spread your legs further eagerly. The tip of his index finger slides up and down between your folds, gathering wetness and using it to help circle your sensitive nub. You whine softly against his lips. “Good girl, you sound so beautiful when I make you feel good,” he praises. He leisurely slides a finger into you, which you accommodate easily due to your high state of arousal. His lithe fingers reach places you’d never even realised you’d had before your relationship with him, gently stimulating the tender spongy spot within you that makes your hips buck. He adds another finger, making you gasp and moan softly. He strokes your walls for a moment, letting you adjust to the stretch, which doesn’t take too long in the state you’re in. You stare up into his eyes, silently begging him to move his fingers, he grins back at you, his nose bumping yours affectionately. “What is it, my love?” you whine at his playful innocence, he gets like this sometimes, all smug and teasing, a monster that you had created.

“M-move them, please,” you pant, tugging uselessly at your restraints. He gives you a pointed look and you stop.

“Okay, but you have to keep being good for me, I know you can,” he kisses the corner of your mouth, slowly withdrawing his fingers and pressing them back in. You mewl softly, digging your heels into the plush mattress. His fingers move slowly and expertly from months of memorising your body, pushing up against that tender spot with each thrust. The room fills with vulgar wet sounds and Severus finally thinks to cast a silencing spell with his free hand. You blush, both at the realisation you hadn’t been silenced, but also at the nonchalant way he does magic while moving his fingers inside you. It’s oddly hot and he feels you fluttering around his fingers. “What is it, sweet girl? What made you throb?” he enquires, kissing your jaw. You giggle breathlessly, his fingers still working you.

“Just you,”

“I’m flattered, my love,” he purrs. “You’re so perfect for me, aren’t you? My dream girl, my perfect girl,” he mumbles between kisses against your skin, his fingers speeding up, making you whimper and squirm. He sits up, his movements never ceasing, to look over you. Your hands tied sends a possessive thrill through him, the more innocent thought that you trust him like this, and the more dangerous idea to keep you like this. “Look at you,” he hums. “You look divine, all flushed and needy for me,” he punctuates his sentence by beginning to circle his thumb over your sensitive bundle of nerves. You choke out a moan, your eyes closing for a moment. “You’re doing so well, my love, good girl, you must be getting close,”

“Y-yeah,” you moan, your back arching slightly.

“You always look so beautiful when you come,” he muses, intensifying his movements. Your moans pick up, louder and more frequent, your hands tensing and untensing in the restraints, wishing to grab onto something but unable to do anything but dig your nails into your palms. “That’s it, let yourself go, be a good girl for me like I know you are,” he coaxes. “Let me feel you come on my fingers, let me feel your pussy clench,” you gasp at his lewd words, your head growing fuzzier. It only takes a few more moments and you fall apart, your whole body shivering and going warm. You cry out his name in desperation, nails digging into your palms, back arching up off of the bed. He keeps going relentlessly, feeling you clenching around his fingers, driving you to the point of near insanity, wailing in pleasure before he finally slows down his ministrations. “You were so good, my love, so beautiful, I’m so proud of you,” he leans down, kissing across your chest once more, slowly withdrawing his fingers. You whine softly, your chest heaving under his lips as you struggle to regain your breath, your heart pounding under your skin. “That’s it, calm down for me,” he soothes, kissing up to your mouth and pressing a lingering kiss to your parted lips. “How was that?”

“Yeah, good, very good,” you laugh breathlessly. He caresses your cheek, nuzzling your nose with his own.

“Did being tied up make it better?”

“In some ways, it felt more intense, more submissive than I usually am, but I did miss touching you,” you explain quietly. He nods along in understanding. “But I’ll happily do it again, I just need some recovery time,” you smile sheepishly, and he kisses your cheek.

“I understand, my love, you’ve been a very good girl, no more tonight, my perfect girl must be tired,” he hums. He leans up and loosens your restraints, placing placating kisses on your wrists where the rope had been rubbing slightly, but he doesn’t entirely remove the rope, just gently massaging your wrists with his thumbs for a moment.

“Are you going to untie me?” you ask playfully. He pauses for a moment, thinking, before fiddling with the rope again. He secures your wrists to the headboard of his bed, making you furrow your brows in confusion. “You said no more tonight,”

“I know, my love, and I stick to it, but I think I’ll keep you here anyway,”

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

xoxoxo

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velvetvexations · 3 months ago

Note

the "only trans girl in a space" discourse is so interesting to me bc like... it is also often a deeply lonely and isolating experience being the only transmasc in a space, lol.

like. I'm the only transmasc in a house full of transfems. and when their friends and partners come over, i am even further outnumbered. I don't think that's a red flag or makes my housemates bad people, lol. that would feel transmisogynistic. also, I love my housemates? do the hypothetical single trans women in transmasc dominant spaces not love their friends? or is the implication that they are being manipulated into thinking things are fine...? because that happens, yes, but that happens with literally any group of people. there are plenty of groups of trans people who love each other just fine lol.

also yes, I love my current housemates, but we had a former housemate (also transfem) who frequently made transandrophobic microagressions both to me and to other random transmascs. and it felt really isolating! especially when other housemates didn't say anything about it to them. but that housemate's part of a particular transfem culture in our city that leans much more transradfem. quite a lot of casual man hating comments including just like, insulting the appearances of random men they disagreed with? and that was the sort of thing that my other housemates and I would talk about, and they would say how it made them uncomfortable too. there are "trans community" events in my city that are not safe for transmascs to go to because we will experience major hostility from trans women there. and it makes other transfems uncomfortable, because they're all policing and sniping at each other too!!!! it's not really about supporting each other, it's about being the Best Woman, and it sucks so bad [much of this is directly quoted from my ex, who was made to feel violently uncomfortable in those spaces as a more or less transfem nonbinary person. they identify kind of like "if a girl was a guy", and you know how the tirfs tend to feel about that].

you're the third or fourth anon I've got about this in a few days and I have to say, if this discourse has continued past that one post from awhile back I will walk nay run into the fucking ocean

#trans misogyny #transandro phobia

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livin4woso · 7 months ago

Text

Chapter 1- breaking the media

You knew that clubs would be interested in you but definitely not this one. You were 16 and playing for arsenal after transferring there when you were 13. You started your career off at sunderland your home club with the aspirations to be like the many legends from sunderland including beth mead, lucy bronze, Jordan nobbs there were plenty to idolise so when arsenal had offered you a place on the u16s at 13 you couldn't resist. Your parents had very little care for the fact such a large club was interested with you and had no intention to move from the north east to london so therefore sent you to a foster home for your time at arsenal. The people who you had lived with were amazing and at some points you believed they were better than your own biological parents who gave no interest in your career and no care for you in general.

Your time at arsenal was amazing you were flying through the age groups and here you landed on the first team of arsenal. Now maybe this was due to the plenty of injuries of the backline and of laura the right back which just so happened to be where you played on the pitch that lead you to your debut but you were estatic to say the least. You only played half the game but didn't mean that you couldn't leave your mark on the pitch you had executed the perfect slide tackle on lauren hemp swiftly removing the ball from her feet as she edged nearer to the box.

That tackle had left jonas an impression and many other teams beyond the wsl. You began to make more frequent appearances on the team but only as a sub but still each time you stepped on the pitch the media was all over you the next star girl who was gonna be the big thing. All the titles and names should have put pressure on you to do better yet it never did infact it was motivation to carry on. Summer had arrived the end of the season meant big transfers arsenal had missed out on winning the title race yet you were the most popular conversation topic of where will you move next or if you would stay at arsenal. Now the conversation was relentless everysingle club had wanted a piece of you and for good money from what you had heard but it was ultimately your decision and a little bit of arsenals choice after they had turned down bids from Manchester city and Chelsea early in the transfer window.

Of course you wanted to stay at arsenal, you thrived there your idols were there you grew up admiring leah williamson, beth mead and vivianne miedema, you had a few offers on the table that your agent had given to you yet none of them beat arsenal or had come close to the same pay check but that wasn't the reason you were staying it was more of the bragging rights to say you were friends them even though you were like the adopted child of arsenal many complained that your presence was aging them but it was only for jokes they loved you really. Then the call came at 11.40pm just as you were about to crawl in bed after a long day of pre season grind as unlike the other girls you couldn't go on holiday and get drunk on a beach you were 16 you couldn't even legally drink but that didnt stop you. You were exhausted as sleep weighed on your eyelids then the phone rang.

"Barcelona are interested in you" your agent said to you. "WHAT, YOU'RE JOKING" you shouted almost waking up everyone in your house. "Yes but if you want to go you need to have an answer by tomorrow, the contract is a multi year so it will be constantly updated each year..." your agent began to ramble on about the terms of the contract "yes" you splutter out interrupting his long speech "yes what?" He asked back almost fed up of your frantic behaviour "yes, i want to go its the only club i would leave arsenal for and im not gonna get another chance like this" you said firmly there was no hesitation behind your words "right then we will final up the deal with arsenal and Barcelona and we will figure out an appropriate wage" he said almost scoffing at that last comment and going back to his professional terms (ramble) which meant nothing to you.

Once he hung up the phone you lay in bed in the darkness when reality hit you "omg im going to play at Barcelona" you said to yourself "OMG IM GOING TO PLAY AT BARCELONA" you repeated to yourself this time shouting almost squealing in fact. You couldn't believe it was happening, and you drifted off waiting for the deal to finalise it. It was going to be a long process of negotiation, but it was on you were willing to wait out for .Soon the red and white iconic kit would change to a blue and purple equally as iconic kit and you had a chance to write a legacy one which you knew would catch the medias attention, maybe even break it.

#woso x reader #woso #wsl #alexia putellas #alexia x reader #mapi leon #barca femeni

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pinkslaystation · 10 months ago

Text

Impressive yet Unimpressed.

König and gn!Reader

In which König overhears gossip about him, and the change in his actions affect you, physically and mentally. yALLLLL i'm back >_< here's some unedited shit for the könig girlies (me) - also why do i get this writing motivation late at night :/

Part 2 ;> Word Count: 2.3k

Everyone knew König was infatuated by his partner. By you.

His closest closest friends, included Horangi, were aware of your slightly secret relationship - considering you were all in the same team.

The way he his eyes found you during training, the way he gently held you in his arms when it came to practicing shooting, the way-

You get the point.

Sometimes when your team went out for missions, König found himself committing slight mistakes, such as being distracted by you leading to a close call of a bomb detonation.

"König are you fucking insane? Where's your mind at, man? You're fucking up the team!" One scolded at him in the aircraft post-mission, flying your team to safety.

But König attention remained at you, his eyes focusing on how you managed to still look good regardless of the numerous scars and fresh bruises littering your face. His hand held a (squished) flower that he found, hoping to decorate your hair once landed.

And his feelings were most definitely reciprocated. Your eyes would roam his large frame, muscles tensing as he gripped a fellow teammate in a headlock (me when König? me when.), and you often found yourself unconsciously leaning back into his chest as he held you protectively during practice.

Walking around the base, recruits recognised you, your hair always sporting a different single flower sitting by your right ear.

But not only as his partner, but you also appreciated him as a friend, training you when you first joined, helping you revise for tests, filing paperwork with you.

And although you both found comfort and love from each other during the long weeks of being at base, König often found wanting more from you. He wanted everyone to know he's yours and that you're his. He wanted to take the relationship to the next step, he wanted marriage, he wanted kids, he dreamed of retiring from the military and moving to cute little cottage in the Austrian countryside with you, content that you would both be no longer affiliated with a workplace that screamed violence and limited possibility of survival.

And although the military was all he knew, given he enlisted into the military freshly 17, he knew it wasn't his future, no.

His future was with you.

König found himself walking towards his senior's office, smiling under his mask as his mind frequently hovered over you. Teams for the next missions had been released during the previous meeting, and König wanted to switch to be in the same group as you - so he'd be at peace that your safety in within his arms.

But as his hand gripped at the door handle, his focus switched to the muffled voices from within the office, his ears perking up at his name being thrown into the conversation.

"...he's got soft, sir!"

"We could've died in the last mission, sir, I mean he's an insertion specialist, but the only thing I see him inserting himself into, is his girl, sir!"

König froze. Soft? He's gone soft? He's been described as a fucking battering ram, the fuck do you mean he's gone soft?!

"Like the last training session, this guy spars everyone, and lord does he beat everyone, but the moment he's paired with them, he's fucking rolling on the mat or he surrenders?! How is this fai..."

"...he lives and breathes them sir, it's putting the other soldiers at risk. Does he have to come with us for this mission?"

König zones out. His entire life is the military. In his bare room in the barracks. Not a little cute little cottage in the Austrian countryside?! His home is at the Kortac base, his mind is with his team, and he definitely doesn't live and breathe you.

The muffled voices pause, as if coming to an agreement, and König hears footsteps, quickly hiding behind the door, which opens to reveal the voices.

His teammates.

The teammates he's grown up with.

They thought he was going soft...becoming weak...

König furrowed his eyebrows in humiliation.

A mission without him? That's like asking for death. He'll show you death.

König naturally found himself coming to you, having overheard this mood upsetting gossip about him.

But little ol' you didn't know any better, when he dashed into the common room only to grab a cold beer from the fridge, without a regular smooch to your head, not even a look in your direction, it didn't register how much deeper the crack in your relationship had become...

The day of the mission had come, and although König had told you that went to talk to the higher ups, you couldn't help but be a bit upset considering they hadn't switched you to his group, finding yourself still in your own.

But you didn't mind. You just wanted this mission to be over, so you could find yourself resting in his arms rather than on this random soldier's shoulder.

The aircrafts that held your group and his, raced over the landscape, planting itself by the safe house in the darkness of the Saudi Arabian night.

As the multiple groups landed, soldiers scattering the group as they exit the aircraft, you find yourself making eye contact for the 6'10 colonel.

You send a slight smile his direction, only to be met with a hidden frown behind his mask. You're confused. Usually, his eyes would crinkle with his smile, but your thoughts are interrupted - you're on a mission.

You're huffing, your vision blurry and you find yourself back onto the aircraft? But this isn't your team, as your look around your surrounding, realising you're lying in the middle of the aisle bordered by soldiers. It's König's team.

To your right, you see König...and he's not even looking your way? And to the left is Horangi, his hand rising for a slight wave.

Why aren't you with your team? Where is your team? Where is the air craft going? Why is König not looking at you???

Your eyes shut in pain, and you wince at the slight pain by your abdomen; it's the last thing you feel as you find yourself losing consciousness, failing to see König falling to his knees to aid you as you pass out.

"...bullet grazed abdome..."

Huh?

"...ight concussi..."

Bright light shines in your face.

"...few days..."

This could be the medics, but the way the lights blind your vision, you question whether your well-being is at safe hands or not.

You open your mouth to speak. You can't.

The dryness of your throat restricts you from speaking, but thankfully, one of two medics catches the movement of your lips.

"Soldier, you're okay! Jus' a concussion and stitches on your stomach, cleaned up, not to fret. 6 to 7 days 'til you're free to go, give or take-"

You raise your hand to point towards the freshly scented bouquet of flowers.

"Oh, yeah. Someone brought them...didn't catch the name, solider. Now rest. You need it."

A week of your teammates visiting you goes by, a week of fresh sets of flowers sat by your bed everyday, and although you're happy to be back with them in training, you're dishearten that König didn't find his way to your hospital bed.

Everytime you asked, you received the same response.

"Not sure dude, haven't seen him in a while, stuck in the gym by the looks of it."

You raise your eyebrow. "So...he never visited me?" Voice quivering.

Your teammates shrug.

"Your guy's gone mad in training. Struck his elbow into my neck, and now I want to be on the bed beside you." One said.

"Missed me so badly, you guys have been sending me so many flowers, 'n this place has become a forest!" You laugh, followed by a painful cough, and your friends rush to your side.

"I'm fine, I'm fine, just wanna be back with the team. Just wanna be back with König..."

The medic ends the visitation, walking your friends out the room, leaving you to close your eyes once again as sleep evades you. Outside the room, a confused group discuss.

"We never got her flowers?"

"Forget the flowers - why is there a medal there?"

Whilst you were resting away in your bed, König was awarded for his bravery, putting himself forward to rescue his soldier, you. He felt selfish for enjoying this familiar attention, being praised by someone other than you.

He was impressive on the field..

He walked into the hospital room, when he knew you were resting, after begging and almost on the verge of bribing the medic to let him in after visitation hours.

He decorated your room with the freshest flowers, arrays of bouquets of roses and tulips, dahlias and peonies, as if it were a room full of boyfriends waiting for their girlfriends on valentines day.

There you rest, your chest heaving as you snore. König leaves a flower in your hair, by your right ear, before leaving your room.

It's been 10 days since you've been admitted into the medical room, and 0 days of being with König. Awake that is...

Your teammates are right, he's busy in the gym. Men's only gym...what a calculated move, you think.

Though you're still questioning your actions. What did you do for him to be ignoring you?

So here you are, walking into the combat room, numerous pairs sparring, including König. You aimed to talk to him, ask him why he didn't visit you during your admission to the medical room, and why a shiny gold medal rested, engraving his name, rested underneath your sweatshirt.

The medic warned you, "No physical combat yet - a few more days 'til the cut on your abdomen closes."

And you weren't here to spar, God no.

You were here for König - who's currently...on top of a recruit, fists beating against the poor opponents bloody face.

You push pass the crowd, surrounding this brutal fight - you call it a fight although, from a third party, it looks just like a murder.

"König! Stop! What the fuck are you doing?" You shout at him, trying to get his attention. But your voice is overpowered by the hollering and whistling of the surrounding crowd.

"König! Enough!" Still nothing.

"Köni-"

His eyes meet yours. But not a look of adoration, no. A murderous look. A look that could kill. His eyes, a gentle blue, now a bloodshot red. Like a madman. Like a man-hunting lion.

A shiver runs down your spine.

Another voice breaks out into a shout.

"Who's next" He looks to his left.

"- to fight -", He looks to his right.

"the big the almighty, the Austrian King, Kööööniiiiig!" He announces, elongating syllables, as if a commentator for an illegal underground boxing ring.

"Any contestaaants?" His voice annoys you, why isn't anyone helping the poor soldier? And why is König behaving this way? All macho?

Normally, a quick spar with König would consist of a few skilled moved thrown around, before continuing to the next opponent according to the rotation. Not like you would know, he usually just rolls on the mat or he surrenders, too afraid to hurt his precious lover.

You begin to scream, "Stop this figh-"

König eyes rest on yours, and this signals the commentator-wannabe to point directly at you.

"The neeeeext opponent-"

Oh no.

"isssss-"

Why is everyone looking at you?

"Youuuuu!"

Me?

In a matter of seconds, the crowd formed around König and the now unconscious soldier moves to border you and König.

König stands up, his 6' 10 self towering over you, even though he stands 7 metres from you.

He steps towards you slowly, and your eyes fall down to his boots.

His left foot moves, then his right foot.

Left.

Right.

And now he's right in front of you, red eyes cutting into you. He scoffs, looking down at you condescendingly.

"Wait-" Your mouth runs dry again.

He steps forwards once again.

"Wait, König, I can't, I was disch-"

But this doesn't stop him.

He grabs your sweatshirt at the chest, unknowingly clutching onto the tucked away medal, and with a swift move, he places his second hand onto your back, and throws you straight onto your back.

He throws you directly onto your back.

Your thankful that you didn't land onto your front, your stitches would have broken immediately, but at this point, you're not too sure, and you're clutching onto your stomach again, curling into fetal position onto the floor.

Something is definitely broken. You can tell, because when you open your eyes, you see people staring from above you, while you lay on the mat, laying in a blood of a deep red liquid.

Your ears are ringing once again, and you lay motionless on the floor, cursing internally for being so weak.

König smirks at you on the floor.

Weak? Him?

Soft?? HIM??

He chuckles as people begin to pat his back, fist bumping and side hugging the soldiers around him.

He turns to you once again.

"Shows over, liebing, get up now." He breathes heavily.

You don't move.

"Schatz...enough acting..."

Nothing.

He steps towards you, kneeling to reach your level, his eyes catching sight of the pool of blood.

"Meine Liebli-"

His fingers touch your skin and his blood runs cold, whilst yours run down the mat from your broken nose.

"Schatz?"

The crowd dissipates and the medic runs into the middle of the scene.

"I told her no physical exercise! König, why didn't you stop her!" He scolded at König.

"Now help me carry her to the medical room - again!"

König, who didn't dare to speak, looks up, eyes wide open.

"König!"

The medic looks down at him.

An unimpressed look rests on his face.

YALLLLLLLL the angst, call me mcdonalds cos i'm loving it :D Quick notes: The move König pulls at the end is written a little confusingly (MY APOLOGIES LMAO), but it's inspired by the wrestling move -> The Arm Throw. I hope this helps you visualise it better. I've decided to start a tag list! -> lemme know you're interested to be tagged in my future posts! tags -> @lilliumrorum

#call of duty #cod #konig angst #konig x reader #konig cod #konig mw2 #konig call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #cod mw2

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jealousmartini · 5 months ago

Text

It's 21:09, or 9:09 pm on the 12 hr clock shifters. You know the drill. Let's shift.

∘₊ ✧───────────────────✧₊∘

Some stuff I have included in my kpop drs (Specifically O.M.G and MKB) that make them really special to me😫🥹❤️

000 :: Friendships and crushes

Around 2011 to 2018, companies like BIGHIT, Starship, and JYP were very lenient toward friendships with other K-pop idols opposite their gender. This is so special to me because I have THE LOUDEST MOUTH EVER when it comes to who I've got a crush on (looking directly at you wonyoung, jungkook, nayeon, jhope, chuu, taehyung, jimin, keeho, yeonjun, yoongi, sana, jin and namjoon) and who I am best friends with. (looking directly at you wonyoung, jungkook, nayeon, jhope, chuu, taehyung, jimin, keeho, yeonjun, yoongi, sana, jin and namjoon again.) Yeah i am best friends with idols i have crushes on If you couldn't tell. This basically gave me the freedom to talk my ass off about "Ooo wait whys San from ateez kindaa" or "NAH cus what do yall know about my goat min yoonfreak yo." And "No cus I've got the biggest girl crush on Jennie from blackpink right now"

All companies would only become stricter with this after 2019 due to fans complaining about dating rumours and feeling like the relationships are too close (girl I know like I've heard these complaints before) because they like the idea of their idols being single. This makes the 3rd generation of kpop even more precious due to how open idols were with who they were friends with.

Just to make this clear tho, no one in BTS has confirmed or explicitly admitted they have a crush on anyone in O.M.G (or MKB for that matter) they have only mentioned how "so and so" is really cool or subtle compliments like "blah blah is actually really pretty" but I will admit Taehyung mouth is almost as big as mine when it comes to who he likes lmao and sometimes he makes it a little obvious with the "subtle hints" he gives☠️☠️

001 :: Fun facts about O.M.G and MKB!

OMG and MKB are practically the same. One of the only things that differentiate them from each other is the way OMG and MKB was introduced to the KPOP industry.

O.M.G started off as an independent kpop group made by 6 girls for fun but then ended up being adopted by JYP in 2015 because of how much they had blown up in Korea and JYP saw a lot of potential in O.M.G, but even before then, they were widely known and loved amongst Koreans and most of the Western world. It started off as an animated girl group, all music, choreography, aesthetics, designs and art were made by me lol but the girls were basically of me and my 5 friends. They would debut the same year JYP adopted them and it would be in 2016 when O.M.G was officially recognised and accepted as a kpop group.

O.M.G would also be labelled as the experimental group because O.M.G wasn't made to be serious but for fun and because of how successful every era of O.M.G is. I mean literally not a single genre they have done has flopped they are just that good.

Now MKB is literally the same as them. 6 girls who body every and all Genres and concepts and aesthetics like it's nothing. Icons. But MKB wasn't a pre-existing group. JYP had put these 6 girls together and allowed them Creative freedom. This was an experiment made by him that would only come around ONCE and ONE TIME ONLY. He wanted to see what 6 girls could random make together and see if they would be a hit (he wanted to copy BTS lmao) thus why MKB is labelled as the female BTS because of how similar their aura and character was. No one can explain it but everyone gets it.

Both O.M.G and MKB's fanbases are called "Charmings," and their fans independently refer to the members as "Darlings"

How did the fanbases of O.M.G AND MKB even come to be? Literally 70% of Charmings are originally ARMYs. Because of this I frequently refer to my fanbase as CHARMYs

O.M.G and MKB when they aren't abbreviated? O.M.G stands for Oh My Gosh and MKB stands for MaKe-Believe.

002 :: Small appearances in other idols mvs and helping produce music

Randomly popping up as a background character in a kpop group's mv who I am close to isn't rare. Sometimes it's not very obvious, sometimes I am literally hiding in plain sight. I tend to try not to do it too much tho. I can't be THAT ACCESSIBLE..

I already make all of my music from scratch. So I thought it would be pretty cool if I git nosy and helped TWICE or ITZY with ad-libs and instrumentals. No this isn't an excuse to hangout with them more why tf would you accuse me of that.

#kpop shifting #shiftblr #desired reality #master manifestor #law of assumption #4d reality #shifters #loa #shifting #drself #loa blog #reality shift #reality shifting #shifting community #shifting blog

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salmonball · 5 months ago

Text

— [♡] ; Wish You Were Sober

FWB! Gojo x Reader

You and Satoru weren't interested in relationships. After a change in your dynamic, you start to question that.

includes: afab!reader, drinking, smoking, swearing, sfw content, hurt/comfort

wc: 5.4k

(a/n: the guy I wrote this about is in rehab and wants to reconnect and all of it is bringing back memories. so cope with me <3)

Satoru was attractive, to say the least. He just couldn't help it and on top of the confidence dripping from him, he was a hot topic. He had lines of girls out the door begging for a chance with him. But that wasn't something he was interested in, as a noncommittal person. Something you both had in common.

Your friend group had decided at the end of last semester to share rent for an apartment. This included you, Suguru, Satoru, and Ieiri. It was a nice setup, and although the guys sometimes forgot to clean up after themselves, you all coincided well. Suguru was a nice makeshift therapist, and Ieiri would bond with you over sharing hair ties and disaster date stories.

You were closest with Satoru, though. You guys had spent the majority of your friendship having endless late-night conversations and teasing each other any time you could. When you all moved in, despite having his own room, he frequently came to hang out and sleep over. You never thought anything of it, finding his womanizer persona, frankly, irritating. And you loved how open and real your friendship was. No way you'd ever allow yourself to fall victim to him.

Until that night. You and Ieiri had decided to pregame too hard before the four of you went to a party, so by the time you arrived you were barely processing anything around you. Despite this, you had a solo cup in your hand as you danced in the middle of the sticky basement. You knew Ieiri was next to you chatting up some guy, Suguru had left to smoke upstairs, and Satoru... Where was he? Probably finding his conquest for the night.

To compensate for the noise complaints you guys had given him, he'd been going to the dorms of the girls he fucked instead of bringing them home. Which you were thankful for since your rooms were right next to each other, with Ieiri and Suguru's across. Sometimes you wondered if the girls were faking it to be that loud, but you really didn't wanna ask for details.

Cringing at the thought, you quickly down your cup and interrupt Ieiri's conversation to ask if she wanted another drink. She smiles at you, yelling a "yeah, thanks" before you start moving through the crowd to grab them from the frat bartender. As it comes into view, you notice Satoru leaning against the counter, talking animatedly with a girl. You know best not to get in between that, opting to casually talk with the bartender while he makes your jungle juice.

Despite trying to be subtle about your presence, Satoru notices you and sends a blinding smile your way. He quickly excuses himself from the girl to come your way, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. You shake him off with a scrunched nose, not in the mood to feel his sweaty body against yours.

"Hey Y/N/N, you sure you should have that?" He asks, nodding to the cups being handed to you, his speech a bit slurred. "Don't want you to black out, now."

"I'm good, Toru. Go back to what you were doing," you say, flashing a smile at the bartender before moving to head back to Ieiri. You weren't sure you were convincing him or yourself.

"So mean," Satoru pouts at you jokingly. "But fine. I'll keep an eye on you, though."

You roll your eyes, attempting to flip him off. This gets some of your drink on you and you huff, stalking off.

Turns out, he was right to be worried. You're attempting to dance but your head keeps hurting, causing you to stumble into the people around you. Ieiri doesn't seem to notice, not that you'd want to bother her. It seems like her conversation with that guy was going well and you know she's been on a dry spell. You decide to get her attention briefly by gesturing over the guy's shoulder and she nods in acknowledgement.

You nod back, making your way outside to get some fresh air and possibly throw up. You clumsily manage to sit on the porch around some other drunkards, taking in the sight in front of you. The people who were leaving didn't seem in any better state than you and that makes you smile a bit. Someone next to you nudges you, offering their vape to you.

"Looks like you need it," the guy offering gives you a once over.

Wow, what a compliment. You begrudgingly grab it, taking a hit before handing it back. That's when you realize it was banana something something coffee cake extravaganza and the taste is so putrid you actually gag.

"Dude," you manage to cough out. "Get a new fucking flavor."

He laughs, patting your back comfortingly. "You're not the first person—"

"Y/N/N," you look up and see Satoru towering over you. He almost looks relieved to see you, you think. You can't tell anymore. "Hey, you okay? Do you need to go home?"

"I'm good," you say between pants. "I'm so chillin' right now."

"Yeah, I'm taking you home," Satoru looks over at the guy with you and nods at him. "I got her."

You don't process what he says back and it seems like he left. Minutes pass before Satoru walks you to an Uber. The ride home is mostly silent before you realize something and speak up.

"Wait, what happened to that girl you were talking to?"

"I'll live," he brushes you off nonchalantly. "Besides, I needed to take care of you."

"Thanks, dad," you roll your eyes, shoving him.

"There we go, looks like you're sobering up. Just rest for now, okay? We're almost home."

Once you arrive, he helps you to your bed and brings you makeup wipes, at your request. Then, he brings you a change of clothes from his closet. You liked somewhat planning your outfits for the week and he knew he didn't wanna mess that up for you. You both change in your respective rooms before he comes back with two waters and settles into your bed.

"Hey, who said you could be here?" You ask after you have gotten the bottle half empty. Despite this, you lay down to cuddle into him. He welcomes the intrusion, wrapping his arm around you and adjusting the blanket to cover you.

"Shut up, you like having me in your bed," he teases, looking down at your head on his chest.

"In your dreams," you deadpan, tilting your head up at him. "But thank you, uhm, for looking after me."

"Of course, princess."

"Don't call me that."

"Yes, ma'am," he mock salutes with his free hand and you laugh, rolling your eyes.

When you meet his gaze again, he's already staring at you in a way that makes you want to shrink into yourself. You break the contact for a moment before looking back at him, an unreadable look on his face.

"What?" You scoff.

His free hand is now moving to run through your hair, untangling it a bit. "You're really pretty," he hums as he starts playing with specific strands near your face and you're too scared to breathe. He thinks you're pretty right now? No makeup, face flushed from alcohol, your hair a mess from the humidity of the basement you guys just came out of, wearing his baggy clothes. The list goes on.

"Damn, the alc got to you too, huh?" You laugh again, albeit kind of nervously. Was he really drunk enough to use his flirting tactics on you?

"Yeah, but I've always thought you were pretty. Don't act like it's a new discovery," it's his turn to roll his eyes. "You know it, too."

"Okay, but not like this," you gesture down at yourself. "And definitely not from you."

"Let me prove I mean it," he murmurs and then came one of the biggest mistakes of your college career.

He kissed you. You kissed back.

When the realization came to you, you quickly pushed him back, mouth agape. "What. The. Fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck. What are you doing?!"

"I don't know!" He exclaims, brushing his fingers across his lips. "It just... happened. I don't know."

"Seriously, Toru. I literally just told you about how I felt like all my 'guy friends' secretly wanna fuck me and now you wanna prove me right?!" You fall back onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling. "I'm not—we can't. You're not gonna be one of them."

"Hey, wait. You can still talk about that shit with me, y'know?" He turns on his side to look at you, but you can't return the gesture. "We both have rosters, nothing has to change."

"What are you saying?"

"I wanted to kiss you. I know that. And I also know that I genuinely like spending time with you. Why not... have both?"

"You're fucked," you scoff.

"You don't have feelings for me, right?" He asks, and you shake your head at him. Of course not, you've never even seen him as an option. "And I don't have any for you. But I already fucked up. It's like... transactional. Cause I know I'm gonna wanna kiss you again, and we could do that. But still be the way we are."

"So you wanna be friends with benefits?"

"Do you like the idea?" It comes out cautiously.

You hesitate in coming up with an answer. "Can't we just pretend it didn't happen?"

✧˖*°࿐

So you guys tried. Again, you've never seen Satoru in that way before. But after that night, which both of you seemed to remember in the morning, things changed. You caught yourself staring at him more and when you guys hung out, there was nothing but tension. You tried to cuddle with him while you guys played Minecraft, but the proximity was too much and you ended up kissing again. And then some.

After you were both left naked and panting in his bed, he broke the silence. "So is that a yes?" He didn't have to say what he was referring to.

"Shut up."

And so it began. Your sleepovers became steamier and in the quiet moments, you would kiss through hushed laughter. Although you would rather drink 10 bottles of Pink Whitney than admit it, he was ranked number one on your roster. If he was actually participating, that is. You knew nothing would ever come out of this and that was the whole point of your situation. But between smoke breaks on the fire escape and him taking you to his hometown for break, you knew you were fucked.

It was actually in his hometown when you first felt it. Thanksgiving break, he'd informed you that his family was on a trip without him and asked you to come visit. Your family wasn't big on the holiday, so you did. He lived in the middle of nowhere so the trip was pretty long and boring, filled with plain fields.

That night, his friends were having a bonfire and he wanted to take you. He drove, so you knew he wouldn't be drinking. The music plays softly on the radio and you stare out the window. For some reason on the way over you couldn't help but feel nervous. You wanted his friends to like you, you wanted everyone you met to like you, but this felt different. It feels like—

"You're Satoru's girlfriend?" One of his friends had already come to greet you in the driveway, extending a hand. "I'm Nanami, by the way." Satoru quickly smacked it away, rolling his eyes.

"Ignore this idiot, Y/N/N," he comes to stand next to you, gesturing dramatically. You try not to concentrate on the fact that he didn't correct Nanami.

"Well, it'd be a shame if you are. You're too pretty for him," Nanami completely disregards him to focus on you.

You laugh at that, hiding your mouth behind a hand. It was refreshing to see the way Satoru interacted with his friends, you only ever saw how he and Suguru were. "Thank you, I wouldn't be caught dead next to him if I wasn't forced."

"Hey!" Satoru gawks at the two of you teaming up against him, crossing his arms childishly. "Fuck you both, then."

"Trust me, man. I don't want to," Nanami eyes him up and down in disgust.

The three (well, two) of you die of laughter while you walk over to the fire pit. You met everyone there, finding ones you could talk to easier than others. And of course, there were multiple comments on the status of your relationship, all of them along the lines of the first one. You found yourself easing into their dynamic and even making conversation unprompted by Satoru. You try not to get attached but you can't help but feel like you'd wanna come back.

The drinks arrived in the form of a man named Sukuna, who was quick to yell at everyone to "get off your asses and help me". It was kind of intimidating and you walked over to help along with several others. You decide to grab something simple (two bottles of Barcardi), worried about messing up your nails with the heavy boxes. Once the drinks were set on one of those outdoor folding tables, he turned to you directly.

"Thanks, beautiful. Who'd you come with?" He asked, opening a box to hand you a seltzer.

You take it gratefully, clinking cans with him. "I came with Satoru."

Sukuna scoffed, disgust flashing over his face. Compared to everyone else's reaction, his almost felt real. "Can't believe he actually brought a girl home. And she's way out of his league."

Laughing with a hint of unease, you nod. "I've been told."

"Hey, when he fucks it up you can cry on my shoulder," he offers, holding his can up at you.

You're not sure what to think of that so you just nod, thanking him for the drink before walking back to the pit. Looking around, you find there's nowhere left to sit. Satoru notices, giving you a look as he pats his lap. You try not to blush when you sit in his lap horizontally. How were you going to fight the dating allegations like this? You peek to see if anyone is looking, but everyone's in their own world.

The guys decided to start acting like guys and throw an excessive amount of wood into the fire, making it crackle and roar. The embers spit out at you way harsher, and you flinch away.

Satoru takes off his Carhartt jacket, putting it over you as his arms wrap around you. One around your shoulder and one on your thigh. Successfully comforted, you lay your head in the crook of his neck. "Thank you."

"Wouldn't want you to go up in flames," he smiles at you. Then he leans down so your conversation becomes more private. "Try not to talk to Sukuna too much, he's an asshole. He's only here because he invited himself."

"He seemed nice enough."

A scoff is heard above you as Satoru wraps his arms around you tighter. "Only cause you're a girl. Watch the way he talks to the rest of us."

You do from the corner of your eye, sipping your drink casually. You loved the familial energy of everyone at the bonfire so far, but you could tell Sukuna's presence had a negative effect on the people near him. They didn't lean in to talk to him, more like leaned away. You hear him obnoxiously ask, "so where the bitches at?" which makes a few of the guys around him visibly cringe as he barks out a laugh, punching one of them hard in the arm.

"Wow," you giggle.

"I know," Satoru rolls his eyes. "So besides him, what do you think of everyone else?"

"Everyone's so kind. It feels really homey, you know?" You gush. "But I really like um... Choso? And Nanami."

"Good choices," he hums. "Nanami is my best friend, besides Suguru."

"Hey, how come you didn't invite him and Ieiri?" Your gaze moves to the fire, which has calmed down a bit.

"I didn't think about it. Wanted it to be just us," he shrugged. "And I told you I'd take you stargazing for real, right? Out here there's not a lot of light pollution." He points up at the sky.

You follow his finger and gasp, pulling your head away from his shoulder. You'd been in the city or along the border of one your whole life. You've never seen this many stars before and you can't stop staring. The night sky wasn't just littered with stars, it was covered in them. How had you not looked up sooner? "Holy shit, it's beautiful."

"Yeah, really is," you hear Satoru murmur. You take a break from craning your neck to gaze at the stratosphere to instead look down at him and notice he's already looking at you. His expression is unreadable as usual, but you don't care because he's... beautiful. His eyes are reflecting yours, with speckles of stars in them and it's so much easier to see the dots because of how bright they are. His eyes look angelic, so calm and fond.

There, holding an unwavering gaze with Satoru under the stars, you knew you were fucked.

It could only go downhill from there.

✧˖*°࿐

A few days after you get back home, you're surprised when Satoru asks to visit you. "It's only fair," he claims over the phone.

You tell him that there's not much to do where you live, but he insists. During the day time he gets to meet some of your family, but you know they wouldn't let him stay over. At night, you show him your driving skills before he promptly switches seats with you, fearing for his life.

In the passenger seat, you give him instructions on how to get to your favorite parking lot. It looks over the water and at night, you can see the lights of the town across the way. He backs into the lot so you can open the trunk and sit.

"You know, compared to my sky yours isn't too bad," he says passively.

You stare up into the water and sigh. "Yeah, but I'm never gonna forget the stars in your butt fuck middle of nowhere town."

He shoves you and you smile. To distract yourself from your newfound view of him, you look around. In doing so, you start getting paranoid about the shadows surrounding you under the streetlights. He seems to notice and pulls you into his lap to face him.

"Scared? This is supposed to be your territory," he teases.

You push your hands against his chest, huffing. "The trees look like... people, like that one." You angle your body as much as you can to point to an area down the street.

He looks over and nods, smirking as he turns to you. "Yeah, it kinda looks like the lady from that horror movie we watched."

"Stop," you whine as he starts repeating one of her phrases. You curl impossibly closer to him, wrapping your arms tightly around his neck in fear.

You feel his chest rumble with laughter as he rubs your back. "Hey, hey. I was joking, relax. She's not real and if she was, I got you."

You grumpily pull away to look at him, swatting at him. You're about to call him a slur of insults before your breath hitches. It was the same feeling you got at the bonfire and you can't help but savor it for a moment. The way he looks at you, or maybe looks in general makes your heart stutter.

You try to shake the feeling as you lean on him again, unable to hold eye contact anymore. You hate everything.

✧˖*°࿐

Once break was over and you were back in school, Satoru's list started back up again. Yours did, too. But no matter how much time you spend with however many other guys, nothing could recreate the spark you have with him. And to make everything worse, Satoru would shit on every guy you ever brought up. It's like he knew they couldn't compare.

Every weekend he wouldn't come home and you'd have to cry yourself to sleep, staying up to listen for a door click. It was pathetic. You felt pathetic. You knew the deal when you started this whole thing and it wasn't even your idea. In fact, this is something you never even wanted. So why were you the one catching feelings? It felt like a cruel and unusual punishment.

One of the times you actually heard the door click, you perked up in your bed. You sat up fully when you heard the knock on your door. You didn't even get to say anything before Satoru was stumbling in, clearly drunk.

"Toru? What's wrong?"

"It's so fucked, everything's so fucked," he mumbled, walking over to strip next to your closet, knowing you hated outside clothes on your bed. In his boxers, he climbed into bed with you, wrapping his arms around your torso.

"I thought you'd be gone tonight," you say, running a hand through his hair.

"I was supposed to be, but," he groans, huffing into your skin. "The girl told me she liked me and... I dunno. She knows the deal but she wants to go on a date."

Your heart pangs at that, glad the room was so dark he wouldn't be able to see how your face fell. You feel bad for her because you'd be in the same position if he continued to drive you crazy. Honestly, good on her for holding on for so long. And you feel bad for yourself because... well, it's horrible to hear about other girls from the guy you like. "So what'd you say?"

"I told her I dunno. Cause I don't. She's nice and all, but relationships scare me," he lifts his head to search around your drawers for a shot and takes it, sighing. "What'd—do I do?"

Biting a lip to try to hold back the tears forming in the corners of your eyes, you try to keep your voice steady as you speak. "Well, if you like her enough you should do it. I mean, you've spent enough time enjoying your youth. I'm not saying you should get married, but maybe it's time to settle down and stop fighting demons or whatever the fuck."

He snorts at that, shaking his head while you take the moment to subtly wipe your tears. "I dunno if I like her, dunno what that feels like."

"You've never had a crush before?"

"Of course I have, but 's different for every person I like. I dunno what it feels like for her."

You nod but realize he can't see you so you hum. "It's really up to you, maybe you could make a pros and cons list—" he interrupts you with another huff of laughter and you smack him lightly. "I'm serious if you're this confused. And then maybe the date could help you figure out if you like her or not. A date isn't a proposal, it's not even a relationship. The whole point is experimentation."

"Okay," he leans his head on you and you can feel how warm his face is. From the alcohol or the topic of conversation, you're not sure. "You're so smart Y/N/N, you know that? And pretty, and kind, and funny, and—"

"Are we talking about me or the girl?" You shut him up, frowning.

"Maybe that's what this is," he responds. "I like you 'nd not her. That's why I'm confused."

You freeze up, pausing your hand in his hair. You wonder if he can feel your heart pounding from the proximity and look down at him, the tears starting up again. "Y-You don't know what you're saying, Toru. You're drunk."

"Drunk words are sober words."

"You're such a fucking idiot," you scoff, wiping at your tears again. "Go to sleep, you can talk to me about her tomorrow. If you even remember."

"I try to commit everything we do to mem'ry so I can think about it when I miss you."

"Go to sleep," you state firmly. He can't play around with you right now, not like this. It hurts too much and the thoughts are swirling in your head. How dare he do this to you? And what happened to "no feelings"?

He seems to be ahead of you, saying nothing. You wait until his breathing evens out before you start crying freely, your tears rolling onto your pillow. Of all the people you could've fallen for, why him? What did you do to deserve this? In a negative connotation, of course. And what if he goes on that date and they get serious? You couldn't keep your situation with Satoru so you'd have to lose him. And even if your feelings aren't reciprocated (or so you thought), you'd rather be like this with him than not have him at all.

What are you saying? You don't even have him.

With that last heart-wrenching thought, you fall asleep. In the morning, Satoru retells you the story of him and the girl, seemingly forgetting everything past walking through your door. You give him the same advice and the idiot actually makes a pros and cons list on the whiteboard you guys have in the living room for study sessions. Ieiri walks in while he's writing it and raises an eyebrow.

"Is this not a red flag enough to not do it?"

"What? Is that a con to add?" Satoru turns his head to her. You make eye contact with her from the couch, both of you sharing an exasperated look.

"No, dumbass. The fact that you have to draw a Venn diagram to decide if you should go on a date probably means you shouldn't go on it," she crosses her arms.

"Bro, I don't know what I'm doing," Satoru sighs, bringing a hand to his forehead. "I wish she never confessed. I feel like I lead her on or something and I owe her the date."

"Everyone knows you don't do relationships. And if I were her, I'd rather you just turn me down than take me out for a pity dinner. And if I found out about this," she gestures to the board before grabbing a coat off the hangers by the door. "I'd ghost you."

Satoru looks between her and the board, his face falling. "You're right. She doesn't deserve that, especially if I don't like her like that."

"There you go," she coos at him like he's a child and he scowls back. "I'm out, have fun you two. But not too much fun." With that, she's out the door.

Ieiri and Suguru knew about your arrangement, of course. You lived together. But only Ieiri knew about your feelings towards Satoru and as your friend, she was rooting for you. You're glad it didn't show in the way she spoke to him and you're glad to talk to someone about it who knows him. Your other friends told you that you never should've gotten in the predicament in the first place and he was a piece of shit. But you couldn't help it. Sometimes things just happen and you can't just flip a switch to change your feelings. That didn't stop you from trying, but still.

"I'm exhausted and hungry," Satoru huffs as he plops down next to you.

"Aww, was that too much thinking for your small brain?" You mock him and he flicks your forehead. "I bought brownie mix I haven't gotten around to."

He perks up at that, heading to the kitchen to search through the pantry. You follow and open the cupboards for a bowl and a whisk. You wait for him to grab the box and the rest of the ingredients as you place your items on the counter. He lays them out for you and you add them to the bowl, humming a bit as you do.

He tells Alexa to play the song you were humming and you look at him indignantly. "If you wanted me to shut up, you could've just said so."

"I like your voice, pretty girl. I'm actually encouraging it," he grins at you.

"Whatever," you roll your eyes, adding another ingredient to the bowl.

Satoru comes behind you to circle your waist, resting his head on your shoulder with a mumbled apology for his teasing. There's not much for him to do as you're in charge of the bowl and he was very diligent in being your helper. You can't help but feel like the position is oddly domestic, getting lost in a daydream where you're married, baking together in a bigger kitchen. You didn't notice your hand had stopped on the whisk, so Satoru puts his over yours to guide it.

"What're you thinking about?"

He's right, what are you thinking about? What happened to the noncommittal oath you had at the beginning of the year? "Uh, nothing important."

"Everything about you is important to me. Tell me," he turns his head to kiss your neck, making you shiver.

"Don't say sappy shit like that, Toru," you scold him lightly when you come to your senses. "And really, it's nothing." He sucks on your skin in warning and you hiss. "Stop that, you could leave a mark."

"And if I don't?"

"Then you're gonna scare away my potential suitors."

At that, he sucks down harder and your free hand goes to grab his hair. "Toru," you say lowly, but he doesn't stop, moving his hands to trap you against the counter. You finally pull him off of you and turn around between his arms, putting your hand on his chest. "What is up with you?"

There's a pregnant pause where you both just stare at each other, your gaze harsher than his.

"I get jealous when you talk about the guys on your roster," he admits quietly, not looking at you.

"I get jealous when you talk about the girls on your roster. Especially today's," you murmur back and his eyes snap to yours. "So what does that mean?"

"It means we're stupid," he smiles as he leans down to kiss you and you could cry from happiness. It felt real and full of emotion, like his lips were meant for yours. Everything you've held back was put into the kiss. He only pulls away so you can catch your breath. "I realized that when I imagine getting asked out by you, I don't need the list. It's all pros."

"I can not believe you're confessing to me like this," you scoff in disbelief, a smile playing on your lips. "You really are an idiot."

"Will you let this idiot take you out on a date?"

You hum, pretending to think as you press a finger to your bottom lip. "Well, you might not need a list but I definitely do."

His mouth falls open, clearly offended, before he smirks and slides the things on the counter to the side. He lifts you onto it in its place and you squeal at the change in position. He rests his hands on your hips as he drops his head to your ear. "Then let me convince you."

✧˖*°࿐

When Ieiri got home, she was not happy to find that you guys did, in fact, have too much fun ("on the counter?!"). Suguru gets home a bit after and you all sit in the living room to eat takeout together.

“So, this is an actual thing now?” Ieiri uses her chopsticks to point at the both of you.

“Yeah,” you try not to smile as Satoru leans in to briefly kiss your cheek.

“Fucking finally,” Suguru huffs from the recliner. “I tried to tell Sato that the way he talks about you is not normal.”

“You talk about me?” Your eyes flicker to Satoru’s and he seems shy all of a sudden, using his food as an excuse to avert your gaze. His hair falls over his face as he eats quietly.

“Wouldn't stop, actually. I told him he liked you and he just told me it wasn't like that but, guess who’s always right?” Suguru obnoxiously jabs a thumb at himself. “This guy.”

“Tell me about it,” Ieiri leans forward to giggle, covering her mouth as she swallows her food. “Y/N wouldn't shut up abo—”

“Okay! Can we all just eat in peace?” You interrupt, face flushing from your friends’ analysis of you and Satoru.

“Wait, wait. I wanna hear about this,” Satoru presses into you again, sending you a sly smile as he throws his arm over your shoulder.

It was gonna be a long night.

— [♡] ;

#gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojou satoru x reader #gojo x y/n #gojo fluff #satoru x you #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jujutsu gojo #gojo satoru #jjk gojo

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lvverleavr · 3 months ago

Text

Mutually Exclusive | Entry One

Entry One: Memories Relived

༘ Jake x f oc (Annalise)

༘2.7k words

༘warnings: language, illusions to sex

A/N: This is a first chapter to test the waters on if I should carry out a full fic of this so I'd love any feedback 🤍

Summary: In an ongoing letter to Annalise, Jake tells the perspective of his early adult life— living out his dream with his brothers and her seemingly always by his side. But when the band gets signed to a record label based out of Nashville, Anna struggles with the ability to pack up and leave. With a complicated dynamic by the day his flight leaves, Jake outlines his struggles and worries from the day he left Anna. All things that flood back the moment she shows up out of nowhere three years later.

Entry One:

I vividly remember the first time I met you, you’re barely your own person at fourteen but you were already so– you. Josh had joined the theater club and he couldn’t shut up about you. He went on and on for hours about how you jumped on stage, singing when you were told to sing and even crying with real tears on command. It didn’t take long for me to be captivated by you as well– usually I found the best reason to be out of the house when Josh had the theater group over for practices but once you began to tag along, my social life seemed to free up.

These run ins seemed to be more frequent– you quit the theater club after your first year but you never stopped coming around. Your mother rarely left her bed much past getting a glass of water and your father worked himself to death by the time you were sixteen. Our house quickly became yours too and I never minded, you stayed up even later than me and you spoke in your sleep– I could hear it through the walls when the guest bedroom slowly became entirely yours to decorate, filling it with posters of Jeff Buckley and Stevie Nicks until nearly every inch of the wallpaper had disappeared. My younger brother began to tease me for how much time I spent with you– claiming it was some hopeless crush I had, chasing after a girl who had no idea I was infatuated with her, it made me wonder at times if he saw something that even I didn’t see. Even with the comments they never seemed to phase me, never seemed to shutter the bond that you and I had created. I was really locked in on the band once we hit our senior year, convincing Josh to dedicate a few days a week to the garage and even picking Sam and his best friend Danny up early from school some Fridays for gigs without our mom knowing. You always took our pictures, claiming if we were gonna be a good band we needed some half decent shots. My father lent you his old camera and you became our very own band photographer. Still to this day we’ll all agree that you were just finding a way to feel included on nights we had gigs. By the time we graduated I couldn’t imagine having anyone else behind the stage with us.

We even went to the same school after graduation, you stayed on campus to live out some 2000’s college girl movie dream but I stayed back home and drove to campus each morning. College bars paid us $200 a night for playing from eleven until three am and we took as many as we could get. I promised my parents I’d stay in school while we played, giving me some form of plan b I never intended on using but it was either that or she’d stop letting us take Sam into bars for our shows. Small dive bars at two am quickly turned into real gigs all around town, soon we felt like a real band with a direction being paved for us. Those memories have always been accompanied by the last semester I ever enrolled in.

•••

We moved you back into your dorm, the ice still covered the walkway as we carried the rest of your boxes inside the old building– smelling of damp carpeting and old heat units. You always needed more than you packed and it drove Josh insane every year.

“You have a kitchen, why do you need a second fridge for your bedroom–” He mumbles, trudging up towards the flight of stairs.

“I don’t know my roommate, I don’t want her stealing my drinks while I’m sleeping,” You shrug, swiftly cutting past him and down a small hallway, Josh turning to look at me as I meet him with a matching shrug.

He glances down, watching you tap an elevator button with your elbow which causes him to shake his head, “could’ve told me there was a fucking elevator for our first four trips up to your room,” He mumbles under his breath, looking over his shoulder as I pass, offering a gently pat on his arm before sliding past.

“I thought you knew!” You say defensively as I watch a small smirk spread on your lips. “There’s a big sign when you first walk in that even says it.”

Josh opened his mouth for a rebuttal, quickly clamping it shut with another shake of his head and tapping the third floor button. I couldn’t help but let out a small giggle, Josh’s gaze shooting to me immediately “What are you laughing at Jake?” He snaps, “All you’re carrying is a comforter, you wanna switch?”

I shrug, dropping the comforter by his feet before holding out my arms, grabbing the small fridge from his arms. “You’re a real complainer nowadays,” I say out to him as the elevator doors open, making my way down the hall first to see your apartment door open, “I thought you said you closed this,” I call back to Josh, the two of you trailing behind me.

“I did!” He calls out, “Maybe it's the wind.”

“No wind!” A voice called from inside the door, I took the first few steps in, noticing a set of boxes sat on the couch right inside the door. A short girl rounded from the small kitchenette, she held a grocery bag in her hand and her tight brown curls were pulled back by an old faded bandana. “Are you… my roommate?” She asks skeptically, smiling as I meet her with a quick denial.

“No sorry I’m– um– just helping with the move–” I explain, watching you round the corner.

“I’m your roommate,” You smile, extending your hand out from underneath the box. “I’m Annalise but you can call me Anna.”

The girl smiles, shaking your hand before shaking mine and Josh’s, “Juliet–” She replies, “and you are?” She asks, her gaze lingering on me a beat longer than anyone else.

The eye contact caused my cheeks to heat up slightly as if on their own, “Right. I’m Jake-” I introduce myself, her fingers slowly grazing my palm as she pulls away from the shake.

“Lovely to meet you…” She smiles, turning her attention back to you, “Especially you, Anna– I took the liberty of loading my stuff into the smaller room, had a feeling you already set up in the bigger one.”

I could feel your eyes on me as her touches seemed to linger on my skin, you rolled your eyes at me slightly before finally turning your attention back to what she was saying. “I’ll just be setting up all my stuff just let me know if you need me,” You smiled to her, Josh and I following closely behind you. “Do not even think about it.” You said to me the moment the door closed. I could barely put down the things in my hand before feeling your scowl on me.

“What are you talking about-” I ask, Josh giggling as he sat up on your bed, taking the liberty to rip open a few boxes while you stayed focused on me.

“I saw her looking at you. Do not under any circumstances try to fuck my new roommate.” Your gaze narrowed, pulling a box from my hands and taking it into your own.

“Who said I wanted to!” I ask defensively. You weren't wrong, she intrigued me to say the least but was it really that bad of a thing?

“Because I know you. Don’t do it” You warn, “I have to live with her for the rest of the year. I do not need to put up with hearing about you like that for the next five months.”

“She kind of looks like you a little” Josh chimes in as he picks through the box of snacks he very thoughtfully chose to open first.

“Ew no c’mon don’t say that” I groan, shaking my head. He was right, her hair was the exact same color, her eyes shone the same shade of green and even her smile had a slight crook to it like yours did.

“No Josh you’re absolutely right and you know what Jacob I hope it ruins it for you” You bite, tossing your comforter from the floor and onto the bed beside Josh.

“Whatever okay” I roll my eyes, watching as you open up another box “I'm not that terrible to hear about, don't act like i'm horrible.”

•

Those next few weeks I crashed on your couch between classes, even spending nights there after late Sunday gigs. It was better than driving back and forth to the house and Juliet never seemed to mind. One club had a standing gig with us on the first Sunday of the month, we played the last set of the night and we even started getting a regular crowd to show up and see us. It was small but had a real backstage, it felt like the real deal to us. “I’m not even here stop looking at me,” You giggled, waving Josh off as he kept glancing into the camera lens. “Jake you're next-”

Your voice was faint, my focus on the conversation I was having with Juliet as she tagged along for the night. Her hair was down, draped over her shoulders and it framed the heart shaped neckline of her top. I wish I could say I barely noticed how low cut it was but that would be a lie and she knew it. “No, I never really get the chance to go out to shows. I'm really excited to see you out there.” She smiles, leaning against the beam running floor to ceiling beside one of the curtains.

“The real show is from the front, you should make your way out to the floor to see.” I smile, feeling her fingers brushing my arm. She didn’t even hide that she was flirting with me and at one point I stopped caring and started flirting back.

“Jake-” You repeat, pulling me from my conversation as I look over.

“My turn?” I ask, still feeling Juliet’s eyes wandering across the features of my face as you nod. “Don’t move, hm?” I smile at her, offering a small wink before walking over to you. “Alright where do you want me?”

“Just go fix your hair in the mirror, I need more candid stuff” You say, your tone flattening from what I heard you using with Josh.

“You don't have to get all weird,” I mumble, taking my fingers to gently rake them through my hair. “It's harmless flirting,” You don't reply, the click of your camera is all I can hear, so I keep talking, “Even if something happens you don't have to know about it-”

“Stop talking your messing up the shot,” You finally say, and all I can do is sigh in response. “You can do whatever you want, I just don't need to hear about you two if it happens.” You continue after a few moments of silence, “it's gross.”

I can't help but chuckle, rolling my eyes “You're so dramatic.” Finally turning to look at you, “Like I didn’t have to hear about that god awful sociology TA you had ‘sexual tension’ with all last year.”

You grab a pillow from the small chair in the room, throwing it at me as I start to laugh. “We did, he wanted me and that's why I passed with a 97 on my exam. You're just gonna take the only friend I made here and fuck her.”

I roll my eyes, “You can be friends with her and I can fuck her, they’re not mutually exclusive.”

•

I spent that night on the couch, Juliet leaving for her own bedroom not long before you went to bed as well. I shifted on the couch, finally settling in before needing to shift again. It must've been near two am by the time I felt sleep crowding my vision, jolting back awake to the quiet sound of a door knob twisting open. The soft light from Juliet’s bedroom filled the space just inside the living room, enough for my eyes to adjust to her outline, she glanced at me, offering me a small smile as she noticed I was awake. “Did I wake you up?” She whispers softly, I shake my head in response, “Oh good-” Her eyes linger on me for a moment before making her way past me to the kitchen. I couldn't help but watch as she passed, the warm light outlined her silhouette, her shorts barely covered to her thighs and her shirt lifted up her stomach slightly as she reached into the cabinet for a glass.

“It’s very rude to stare,” I hear her whisper, my cheeks warming slightly as I realize she noticed my lingering stares.

“Oh um I’m-” I start, noticing a smile on her lips as she looks at me.

“I don't mind,” She replies, filling the glass halfway with water before leaning against the counter. Her fingers gripped the edge of it as she brought the glass to her lips. I sat up further, seeing her rested against the counter as she looked at me from over the back of the couch. “Anna didn't seem too happy that you were flirting with me tonight.” She says after a few moments of silence. “You two have something going on?”

I can't help but laugh, quickly clearing my throat to cover it up “Sorry no… no nothing,” I correct her, shaking my head, “She just doesn't wanna hear if something happens… The girls she’s friends with and the girls I date aren't allowed to mix apparently.”

She nods, setting her glass on the counter before stepping towards me. “It doesn't matter though if she doesn't know they mix,” she smiles, “right?” She was standing at the arm of the couch by now and I couldn't seem to pull my eyes away from her, all I could muster up was a small nod. “I’m just saying I’m not one to kiss and tell…”

I sat up the rest of the way, allowing her to sit in front of me on the couch. “You're not one to be subtle are you?” I finally ask, watching as she rests her elbow on the back of the couch, shaking her head as she rests it on her palm.

“I’m not… But then again you're not very subtle yourself” She smiles, watching my eyes trail to your bedroom door. “She's not gonna wake up… We both know that.” She says softly, my attention turning back to her as I feel her fingers graze my knee. Everything in those next moments felt like a blur, a sped up memory and before I could think her lips were on mine. My hand cupped her jaw as her lips pressed to mine, parting slightly as her tongue slid past my lips and dipped into my mouth. My thumb circled her jaw softly as my other hand dropped to her hip, my teeth gently tugging at her bottom lip which pulled a quiet moan from her. My mind swirled as I continued to kiss her, my lips were sore but I craved to taste her even more.

“We should stop” She whispers against my lips, I nod and kiss her harder and she gently tugs at my hair. “Or you can come in my bedroom-” Her words fell from her lips in nearly a whimper, I nodded eagerly, barely able to stand and follow her to her room before I kissed her again.

The night with her came in flashes, the sheer impulsivity of the decision stayed in my mind in bits and pieces but the most I could remember was waking up the next morning. She laid beside me, the blanket covering her bare chest as the sun just barely lit up parts of the room. I knew I wasn't supposed to be in there but I barely remembered even falling asleep beside her. I slid on my shorts quietly, slipping out of her room in an attempt to make my way back to the couch before you left your room, but stopping dead in my tracks as you stood in the kitchen.

“Anna-” I whisper. I don't know why the sight of you had me frozen in place, like I was caught in some terrible act. You glanced up at me, looking me over for only a moment before picking up your mug and walking into your bedroom without another word.

#jake kiszka #greta van fic #greta van fleet #jake kiszka fic #jake kiskza x reader #mutually exclusive

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redroomreflections · 7 months ago

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Who Lives, Who Dies Chapter Two

Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Summary: Natasha and Reader are married. They get into an accident where Natasha suffers serious injuries including amnesia. Natasha no longer remembers her life with reader and their children. All she remembers are her days loving Bruce.

w/c: 4.9k

Another hour has passed when you notice Natasha shift in the bed. Lily is still curled into her while Olivia is sound asleep by her side. You’re sure Natasha has gone past the state of uncomfortable to full-on pain. You also know she won’t say anything if it means keeping the girls close to her. Even in her current state, her first priority is her children. Whom she just met. There’s clear adoration on her face every time she looks down at them. Every sniffle or subtle movement and she’s watching them like a hawk. Daring any hospital personnel to tell her she couldn’t have them here.

For a moment you wish you were Wanda. You wish you could tap into her mind and figure out what she’s thinking. Unfortunately, that's beyond the scope of your abilities. You can feel the magic at the tip of your fingers, it's a low hum, only apparent as you’re stressed. You will yourself to calm down for the time being. You have to do this with a level head. Even when all you want to do is break down and never get up.

“I can take them,” You offer. Alexei and Melina are most likely still in the waiting room. Since hearing about the accident they’ve been helpful. They kept the girls while you took the time to recover. They even kept them during your stay at Natasha’s bedside. “I’m sure you need to rest and stretch. Alexie and Melina are-”

“No,” Natasha frowns. Oh. You hadn’t expected this. “I don’t want them taking them.”

“Natasha, the girls have been staying with them for the past week.”

“No,” Natasha shakes her head again. “I’m their mom right?” You nod. You can see her gain new confidence at your confirmation. “I don’t want them there. I don’t trust them.” She looks at you pleading with you to understand. You do. Natasha doesn’t remember her time in Budapest with Yelena or Melina’s farm or taking down the Red Room again. She doesn’t remember their reunion. You don’t think now is an appropriate time to say that Alexei and Melina have a home just outside of NYC that you visit frequently.

“Okay, Nat, I understand.” You can see her visibly relax at your words. “I’ll call someone else.” You think. There’s no shortage of people who would come and get them at the drop of a hat. The girls are very popular amongst your friend group. Monica would come no questions asked. Though she might not be prepared to keep them for a couple of days. Wanda is the next on your list. She’s good with them. She loves them as if they are her own. You’d have to figure something out.

You look at the time on your phone. Visiting hours would be over soon.

“I have to talk to your parents,” You stand. She bristles at the title you’ve given them. “I can, um, find you something to eat if you’re up to it?”

“That would be great,” Natasha gives you that much. You leave the room with a mission in mind. First is the nurse's station where you ask for food for Natasha. It’s not the best but it would hold her over until you’re home. If she decides to eat. Next is Alexei and Melina who are sitting so patiently in a corner of the waiting room.

“Hey,” You greet them with a sigh. “Look, I’m sorry about what happened in there. She-Natasha is. It’s so complicated.”

“She doesn’t have her memories?” Melina concludes.

“No,” You break it to them gently. “She doesn’t know us. She doesn’t know who we are.”

“So back to square one?” Alexei asks. “We have to win her over again?”You can see the wheels turning in his head. He’s already planning something of how he will get her to speak with him.

“The time that Natasha remembers,” You raise a hand to stop him. “Five years ago. Ultron. It’s when we first met. I don’t think she has any recollection as to how but she remembers battling him. Which means everything after that is iffy for her.” For just a moment you are grateful that she doesn’t remember you. Your meeting was less than fantastic or romantic. In fact, both of you were left with more than enough bruises and scrapes. Your time at HYDRA wasn’t your proudest moment. Somehow you think Natasha won’t be too welcoming of that.

“She doesn’t know the girls,” Melina says lowly.

“She’s Natasha through and through,” You sit beside them. “She doesn’t care if she doesn’t remember. She is their mom and she has her boundaries. She doesn’t want you guys to take them.”

“Then who will?” Melina doesn’t seem so surprised by this though Alexei has kept quiet.

“Yelena is still in and out so it can’t be her.” You shake your head. “Wanda. She’s close. If Nat doesn’t remember much of me then…..” Her words come back to you. She knows. “God! This is so fucked.” You rest your head on the back of the chair to allow the rest of your body to slouch. There’s no way she’s letting the girls go with Wanda. So, Steve is the next option. She knows Steve. Trust him. He wouldn’t lie to her. “I’m, um, I’m going to go make some calls. I’ll be right over there. You guys can go home if you want. I’ll keep you updated.”

They nod, gathering their bearings, before standing to leave.

“Take care of yourself, y/n.” Melina rests a hand on your shoulder. You nod. You’d try your best. Alexei bids you goodbye with a kiss on your forehead. You don’t move until they’re out of your sight. Suddenly it’s weighing on you how different life is about to be.

You pull out your phone to facetime Steve. After a few rings, he answers.

“Hey, how’s it going?” He asks immediately. There’s shuffling in his background and you can tell he’s moving over to his couch. He sets the phone down, making sure it’s at a decent angle, and it’s then the rest of the Avengers step into view.

“Hi guys,” You greet. “There’s no easy way to say this. Natasha woke up. She’s stable. Talking and moving around. You know how Natasha does.” You shrug.

“There’s a but in there,” Sam bends over the couch.

“She has amnesia,” You tear the bandaid off. There’s no sense of sugar coating. “She hit her head pretty hard and things aren’t looking so good in that aspect.”

“How much does she remember?” Steve frowns.

“Ultron,” The word sounds funny on your tongue. It’s still hard to even utter his name knowing what the aftermath was. You lost your brother. Wanda lost her twin. “She remembers being with Bruce and hiding at Clint’s farm.”

“Jeez,” Steve curses. It’s the closest he’ll get to a swear.

“She wants one of you here. To speak to you,” You tell them. “Maybe you Steve? I need someone to keep the girls and you’re the only one she trusts.”

“I understand,” Steve nods. “Of course. Give me an hour and I’ll be there.” Steve promises. He’s always so trustworthy.

“Thank you guys, again.” You sigh for what feels like the millitonth time. “Wanda I will call you later.”

“I’ll be here,” Wanda bids you goodbye. You hang up the phone feeling like a weight was lifted from your shoulders. You return to the hospital room to find Natasha sharing her lunch with Olivia.

“Mommy, no peanuts in it.” Olivia informs you. You look over to the small meal. Green beans, mashed potatoes, a dinner roll, and pudding for desert. Peanut free.

“She’s allergic she told me,” Natasha murmurs. She doesn’t take a single bite of food. “It’s a bad allergy right?”

“Life threatening,” You nod.

“I should know more about them,” Natasha begins. “It’s important that I do.” She’s admitting to a new weakness.

“I will tell you everything you need to know when you are better,” You promise her. “For now you rest. Uncle Steve is on his way to take you home with him.” You bend down to look Olivia in her eyes. She’s too busy making a mess of the mashed potatoes on her face. “Are you okay leaving with Uncle Steve?”

“Yes,” Olivia nods. She always has a blast with him. There’s no reason for her not to be okay with him. You move to sit in your chair, content watching Natasha interact with the kids, as you think of everything that you have to do.

She’s so good with them if a bit unsure of her position. Lily is still sleeping soundly, her face pressed against Natasha’s breast, as she breathes softly. Olivia is more active and has questions about everything. You don’t really pay any mind. Until she brings up her dance recital.

“You didn’t go cuz you were in the car ‘ccident.” Olivia says so casually. “I danced at school.” Natasha looks over to you for answers. “Her dance recital. We were on our way when we got hit by a car,” You simplify it. There’s no need for a full blow explanation.

“You didn’t have any injuries?” She scans you from where you’re sitting. Her tone is almost accusatory. You’re not willing to go there with her.

“Just a few dings,” You shake your head. Suddenly there’s another knock at the door. You stand to open it, thankful for the reprieve, to reveal Steve Rogers in all his glory.

“Unlce Steve!” Olivia grins. “You’re here to see Mama?” She questions.

“I am,” Steve steps into the room. He’s cautious. He comes to the side of her bed. Natahsa’s eyes never leave his.

“You’re bulkier,” She comments. She takes note of his full head of hair and fully grown beard. Steve looks good.

“I lift more,” Steve shrugs.

“I’m going to take Liv to get cleaned up,” You offer to give them some time alone. You reach across the bed to take Olivia. You can see Natasha take a deep pained breath. You ignore it for the sake of not starting anything.

You’re in one of the visitor bathrooms, cleaning up Olivia, when you realize you have to explain it to her. She’s three. She understands and picks up on more than what you think. Keeping things a secret from her won't bode over well in the end.

“Have to dry my hands,” Olivia walks over to the automatic driers to hold her hands under them. She’s so smart and attentive. There’s no way she won’t notice. Once she’s done, you walk over to the visitor's room. It’s not the best place to tell her but she needs to know. Olivia sits in the chair, bouncing in place, as she waits for you to talk. She’s only half paying attention as the hustle and bustle of the room catches her eye.

“Hey, Mouse, I need to talk to you about something important,” You start.

“Important? Oh? What’s important?” She looks to you.

“Remember how Mama and I got into the car accident and she bumped her head really hard?” You try to explain on her level. Olivia nods, picking at her sweater, as she tries to keep focus. For the most part, she’s doing quite well. “Well, when she bumped her head it did something. Her memories are gone. Which means she doesn’t know a lot of things that she used to.”

“Memories are gone,” Olivia repeats though you don’t think she understands exactly how any of this works.

“Yes, her memories are gone,” You try to think of a better way to keep this process smooth. “Mama is sick. So for a little while we have to be patient with her.”

“Oh,” Olivia nods. “Give her kisses and hugs to make it better?”

“I think she would like that,” You are in agreement on one thing. If you know Natasha, and you do, she is going to want the girls there every step of the way. Not that you know what the next step is. Of course, things are a bit harder to gauge when you’re doing it alone and she doesn’t trust half of the people you interact with daily. You could only hope this would work.

Meanwhile, in Natasha’s hospital room, she’s eyeing Steve with a guarded expression and curious eyes. She doesn’t hide her complete distrust for you and the entire situation. She needs to hear all of this from someone she knows. Someone from before. Steve wouldn’t lie to her. At least she hoped he wouldn’t.

“You’re still Avenging?” Natasha asks. She’s asking the easy questions for now.

“I am,” Steve confirms.

“The rest of the team?”

“Scattered but still around,” Steve sits in the chair you abandoned. “Thor is with Jane. They have a baby boy. He’s the same age as your little one.” He gestures to Lily. “Clint and Laura are with the kids still on the farm. Tony is Tony. He has a little girl.”

“With Pepper right?”

“Of course,” Steve nods.

“And Bruce?” She tries to appear uninterested but Steve knows better.

“Bruce is around,” Steve shrugs. “He’s here and there. Isn’t really an Avenger anymore.”

“There’s a story behind that,” Natasha prompts him to speak further but he doesn't.

“That is for another time,” Steve says. He bends until his elbows rest on his thighs. “You’re not supposed to be talking this much. Fractured rib. It has to hurt.”

“You know that’s not going to stop me,” Natasha attempts to take another breath though this time it’s too painful. She can’t even hide it. This leads her into a terrible coughing fit that has her clutching her side. Once she’s settled down, she lies her head against the pillows. “Turns out I have a wife now. I’m married.” She mumbles.

“Happily,” Steve reminds her. She lets her head loll in his general direction before opening her eyes again. “You and Y/n are an example of a loving marriage. Don’t push her away, Nat.”

“Who says I was,” Natasha presses her lips together into a thin line. She would like to drink a gallon of water right now. “She’s pretty.”

“That she is,” Steve laughs. “Seriously, Natasha, that woman would go to hell and back for you. I know your spy training tells you not to trust her. Especially when you only remember you and Bruce. Let her in. You’re going to need the help.”

“I’ve never needed help,” Natasha is a bit snippy with that statement.

“We both know that’s not true, Romanoff but I’ll let you have it,” Steve stands. “She’s raising and having your babies. Don’t write her off so soon. You may find that you’re in love with her all over again.”

Natasha remains mute at his words. Natasha Romanoff could never be in love. She’s never been in love. Love is for children. What she had with Bruce was…different. She can’t put a label on it. Not that she remembers anything that happened after her proposal at Clint’s farm.

“I’m going to take the girls now,” Steve reaches over to take Lily in his arms. She cuddles up to his chest. “If I don’t wake her now she’ll be up all night.”

“You’re taking this Uncle Steve title seriously,” Natasha jokes.

“I have to,” Steve bends to press a kiss to her forehead and finds himself explaining at her surprised face. Back then they weren’t so close. “I’ll be seeing you soon.” He leaves Natasha by herself for a few moments to come and find you.

Natasha finally takes a much-needed deep breath, clutching her side again, as she tries to wrap her head around this entire situation. She’s married. She has kids. What did Steve mean by “she’s raising and having your babies.” Were you pregnant? No. You don’t look it. Maybe it’s just a throwaway line. A thing people say. He also said your marriage is a loving one. Natasha finds this entire thing hard to believe. This one doesn’t sit right with her. She can’t run. Not when those two little girls look up to her as if she means the world. To them she does.

For them she’d stay.

**************************

Steve approaches you in the waiting room with an unreadable expression. He’s carrying a now awake Lily in his arms. When she spots you she holds out her arms for you to take her. You sit her down in your lap, kissing the top of her head, knowing how clingy she is when she’s sleepy.

“How was it?”

“She was fine surprisingly,” Steve admits. “No weapons to the throat or any of that.” He stands with his arms folded. “Are you sure you want her to come back home with you? Maybe it would be better for her to go back to the tower?”

“I’m sure,” You nod and speak past the lump in your throat. “If things change. If she expresses that it's what she wants then it’s fine. She can go back. We can arrange something with the girls and visit. Can we just play it by ear?” You pull your gaze from some random object in the room to Steve’s concerned eyes.

“How are you feeling?” Steve uses that voice. You know the one. He’s so caring and compassionate and somehow always able to pull the truth from you.

“I’m fine,” You have to be. There’s no other choice. “As long as she’s okay I’m fine. I think ask me in a few days. Maybe I’ll have a different answer.”

“Good,” Steve kisses your forehead much in the same way he did Natasha’s. “Now are you girls ready to go with Uncle Steve?”

“Yeah,” Olivia nods. She signs to Lily whose eyes light up at the idea of spending the night with her uncle.

“Don’t worry they’re safe,” Steve nods.

“Is Mama coming too?” Olivia looks over to you. She thinks Steve is taking you home.

“No, Mouse, Mama’s not coming,” You cringe at the trembling bottom lip and the sad expression. “Right now Mama has to get better in the hospital and then we can all go home.”

“To my house?” Olivia questions. She’s not liking this at all.

“Yes, to our house,” You kiss both of her cheeks. “Uncle Steve will take you to Aunt Wanda if you ask and I’ll call you before bedtime. I have to stay here with Mama to make sure she’s doing all better. Is that okay?”

“Yes,” She answers reluctantly but for now a tantrum has been averted. She climbs down from the chair to take Lily’s hand. She’s so protective of her baby sister. You give them both a final kiss before you watch as they walk to the elevator.

It’s then you stand to return to Natasha’s room. It’s time to face the music. You take several deep breaths, willing the magic to calm inside of you, as you walk back to her room. When you step inside, a nurse is checking Natasha’s vitals again. She’s just finishing up when you sit.

The nurse works around the two of you before bidding you a good night.

“Can I have a cot in here please?” You ask before she can leave. She nods before retreating. You turn back to Natasha who’s been watching you thus far.

“You’re sleeping here?” She breathes slower this time. She shifts to get comfortable.

“Yes, I’ve slept here every night since the accident.” You lick your lips.

“Have you eaten?” Natasha questions and for a second you’re hopeful. “Wouldn’t want you to pass out if you’re the one that’s supposed to be taking care of me.” Your face falls though you quickly hide it with something else.

“I can take care of myself,” Your hand twitches. She’s been awakened for five hours and you have yet to kiss or touch her. It’s a bit unsettling. The nerves in your stomach have since turned into dread. There's a pregnant pause before she asks again.

“Who is the woman in your phone? Brunette.” She doesn’t bother to look at you. “A mistress?”

You pat your pockets, wondering when she took the item before she lifts it with her good hand.

“My sister, Wanda.” You answer with a bit of annoyance. Natasha doesn’t recognize her. Which you don’t know whether to classify as good or bad.

“You have a sister?” She looks over to you.

“I do,” You speak softer this time. “I’m not a cheater, Natasha. Whatever thing in your head you’ve thought of is untrue. If you have questions ask me.”

“How long?” Natasha looks up at the ceiling. “Have we been together?”

“Four years,” Her eyes flash to yours. “ Five years ago we met. During Ultron.” You lick your lips again. You don’t mean to leave out key details. It’s better if you do until later. “We moved pretty quickly. With everything that was going on. Marriage was. Is what we wanted in the end.”

“You’re an Avenger you said? How?”

“I have powers,” You raise a hand to show the purple leaving your fingers. Her eyes widen and as quickly as you let it go you put it back. This may all be too much. “I joined around the same time as my sister. She’s an Avenger too. We dated for a while. Me and You. Wne on the run. Got married after. Found the girls.”

“Sounds like a bad movie,” Natasha quops and you snort.

“It does but what can you do?” You shake your head. “For what it’s worth I love you, Natasha.” You try to gauge her facial expression. She’s always been so good at hiding it. “You love me too. Even if you don’t remember. I hope that with time you’ll allow me to show you.”

The conversation ends there. Natasha doesn’t bother looking at you. She sits with her thoughts. She’d rather be anywhere but here. You know her well enough to understand she’ll probably try to break out of here in the middle of the night. Under different circumstances, you’d let her. For the first time in a long time, you feel as if you’re looking at a stranger.

A few days go by, and Natasha doesn’t attempt to escape, but you also don’t make any progress with her. She’s very distrusting of everyone around her/ Especially you. The only time she seems remotely happy is when the girls are around. They bring sunshine to her day and you wouldn't deprive her of that. For the sake of the girls, she pretends to like you. A part of you believes she’s not pretending. She’s trying and that's all you can ask. You rarely leave her side. She takes note of that.

You finally reach a stump when she needs to shower. Natasha isn’t modest. She’s not shy about her body or anything like that. However, you do have to admit being naked and vulnerable isn’t something either of you is going to be able to work with. The nurse offers to help give her a sponge bath and you both practically gag at that.

“Can we use a shower chair?” You offer and it’s accepted.

“You’ll help?” Natasha trusts you more than the nurse apparently. You give her an enthusiastic yes. You help her stand, taking slow and steady steps toward the bathroom, where you turn the shower on. Your arms stay wrapped around her waist as you bend to turn the knob. You try to ignore how good it feels for her to lean on you. You turn back to her, noting the apprehension on her face, as you realize something.

“I have to undress you.” You shuffle from foot to foot. Natasha gives an imperceptible nod. You start with her shirt, keeping your gaze on her face, as you gently lift her arms high enough to slip them out of the sleeves. She’s not wearing a bra and though it’s nothing you haven’t seen before you are aware of how she feels about this entire thing. Next are her pants and panties. You toss them to the other side of the room. You have better ones for her. You look over to the shower, when you look down at your own clothes. You could leave your tank top and bra on and your underwear. You have to climb in with her. “I have to, um, take my-”

“Just do it,” Natasha looks away. She’s more embarrassed that you have to bathe her. You make quick work of stripping before you both step into the shower. She leans against you, her back to your chest, as she breathes hashyl. You sit her down in the chair, kneeling and not quite caring about the steaming water against your back, as you begin to wash her. You start with her shoulders, her chest, her stomach. She keeps her eyes on your face the entire time. You don’t bat an eye when you spread her legs just slightly to clean her there. She gasps though she doesn’t move.

You realize quickly how you messed up.

“Sorry, I should have asked first,” You move your hands to her thighs. You shake your head at yourself.

“It’s fine,” She mutters. Though you can tell it’s anything but. You continue washing her with much more gentleness than before. When you’re done, you step out of the way to rinse her off. Natasha closes her eyes at the warm water hitting her chest. She enjoys the feeling of being clean. When you turn off the water you feel a bit better about everything. You don’t notice her eyes on your backside or the way she watches you as you reach for the towels. You’re half-naked and cold so you try to move quickly. You help her back into the room, dressing her with patience and love, as she lies into the bed again. She doesn’t take her eyes off of you even when you’re getting dressed yourself.

“Why are you doing this for me?” Natasha breaks the silence. You look over from the spot where you’re drying your hair.

It’s simple really. “Because I love you,” You answer before turning back to finish dressing.

You love her with everything in you.

A few days later, Natasha is discharged from the hospital. You'v ordered a few things to be delivered to your house to make her transition better. You pull around to the front of the hospital to the rental your insurance provided for you. You don’t feel particularly anxious until you’re driving away. It’s almost the exact same setup. Except you’re sporting a forehead scar that will fade and Natasha is suffering broken ribs. You hold your breath the entire time, your hands grip the steering wheel harder than necessary, and you’re more cautious the entire way home.

Natasha doesn’t recognize the brownstone or the neighborhood. It’s all unfamiliar to her as she waits for you to park the car. Which you do with ease. Unit #137. That’s your home. Your neighbor, Martha, is outside of her home watering her plants. She greets you as you help Natasha out of her car.

“Oh, you’re home.” Martha smiles. Natasha offers her a wave and a smile but nothing more. “Let me know when the girls are home so I can take them to the nursing home with me next time.” She makes you promise. Martha takes the girls to the nursing home every Wednesday to visit her husband. They love the girls and so does everyone else in the home.

“Will do,” You say before helping Natasha up the stairs. You drop your bags by the front door. She eyes everything. It’s all decorated in varying shades of black and white. There are a few pops of color. Children’s shoes and toys lining the foyer. There’s a nice bench and hook where everything is hung up. Pictures are lining the walls. A grand staircase leads to the second floor. “I know you must be tired. The stairs might be a bit much but I can carry you.”

“You’re going to carry me?” Natasha questions.

You raise your shoulder before dropping it. “The next best thing is the couch and I figured you would want privacy. Our bedroom is the first one.”

“Do we have other rooms?” Natasha looks up the stairs and you feel dumb for thinking she’d want to sleep in the same room as you.

“We do,” You nod. “I can take you to one of them.”

“Okay,” She prepares herself for you to pick her up and you do so with ease. You don’t have superhuman abilities but she doesn’t see you using your powers to take her up the stairs. You don’t strain or even grunt one time. You walk steadily up the stairs, turning to your left, to carry Natasha into the guest room.

“I have to grab your nursing pillow,” You tell her as you help her onto the bed. You rush to your bedroom to grab it. “It’s for if you need to cough or anything like that.” You pass it to her. You stand there for a few seconds longer. “I am ordering takeout tonight. I would cook but it’s been a long few days.”

“When will the girls be here?” Natasha asks.

“Tomorrow,” You clasp your hands together. “Steve is bringing them tomorrow.”

She nods at that. She looks as if she wants to be alone.

“I will be up here for a bit if you need me.” You say awkwardly before stepping outside of the bedroom. You close the door behind you. On the other side, Natasha finally lets a tear fall.

How could she forget all of this?

next part

#natasha romanoff #black reader #natasha x reader #black widow x reader #black widow x female reader #natasha x you #natasha romanov #natsxaddiction

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butchhazard · 3 months ago

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my trans to radfem story. started off as a response to another post i saw but i kind of just kept rambling and now it’s its own thing lol. i was always a bit nervous to share my personal experience out of fear of being judged but i think a lot of people will be able to relate to my perspective. or keep sending me hate if you want it’s all the same to me atp 👯

in the same vein of always seeking out arguments against my own views i frequently look at trans blogs and the amount of projection they do about “TERFs” is astounding. especially claiming that radical feminists have no sense of “kinship” with other women and that we think being a woman is all about suffering and hating yourself. they literally only believe this last part because we’re the only group of people who are honest about misogyny. the “kinship” thing is especially crazy because i WAS trans for *8 years* and during that time almost every single one of my friends was trans as well. i had zero solidarity or kinship with other women and believed them to be completely unrelatable because i was “different”.

the one time i felt brave enough to confide in my closest friend of 10+ years (who later dumped me like trash for becoming a feminist) that i was uncomfortable with penises and only wanted to be with “people with vaginas” she looked at me like i was crazy and told me, “that’s weird. I don’t feel that way. You probably shouldn’t say that.”

eventually i did cave into the pressure of being “inclusive” and put myself in many dangerous situations where men were able to take advantage of me and abuse me. at one point i truly believed i had more in common with TIMs than with “queer cis women” and had come to the conclusion that cis women were dangerous. did this MRA rhetoric serve to strengthen my female friendships like TRAs are somehow claiming it did or did it just make me the perfect victim??? (being male-identified in this way made me a horrible friend not only to other women but to myself as well.)

meanwhile i peaked as a radfem towards the end of 2021, when i was 22. i was staying at a women’s college w/ my ex. for 2 weeks we both felt completely insane and like we had just stepped into another reality. suddenly our lives became so much clearer. we were sobbing constantly just reflecting how misogyny and male violence had affected not only our lives, but the lives of our mothers, sisters, and friends. i was horrified to speak to any of my trans friends about feminism because of the “TERFs are nazis” shit we had been conditioned into believing, but i literally believed that i owed them the truth as a friend who cared and was concerned for their safety. i also naively believed that since *i* realized the TERF propaganda was a complete lie and that radical feminism was not only empowering but life-giving, they would feel the same. nope! they called my ideas brilliant and “galaxy brained” to my face and then turned around and told everyone else i was now dangerous. everyone cut me off from their life as punishment for daring to think differently. i was completely devastated. the friendships that i held so close to my heart for years and years meant nothing to them. this hurt especially because i was starting to realize just how easily they would forgive their male friends for worse, including things like disrespecting them in public or physically assaulting a woman. these were lesser crimes than being a female-identified woman.

meanwhile, around the same time, rumors of our cancelation had been going around the college and another feminist actually reached out to us. she called us her sisters and introduced us to other likeminded women who were so intelligent, supportive, gnc but proudly female. we were all the same yet so different, and different viewpoints were encouraged instead of suppressed. i was learning more about the world and my place in it every single day. for the first time in my life, i felt purpose. every since i was a little girl i had this foreboding sense that other people knew something i didn’t and that i was always “missing a piece of the puzzle”. that feeling disappeared after i became a radical feminist.

since then, almost every feminist woman I’ve met has been such an inspiration to me, regardless of whether i like her or not. it’s actually funny that TRAs claim we have no sense of “kinship” as if women’s lands and festivals aren’t the ultimate expression of friendship and solidarity lol. i’m constantly floored especially by how kind and generous older women are to me, and how easily women my age accept me if i just allow them to. i love being a woman, i love other women, and i know that other women love me.

women in general do have a solidarity/kinship problem but this is simply not true of lesbian feminists and other radical feminists as a community. other women are our strength and lifeblood. after my ex and i broke up (it was messy girl) i wanted so badly to hate her but i literally couldn’t because i still loved her as a woman even if i didn’t love her as a partner anymore. to this day i would probably struggle to come up with a woman i actually “hate” bc it’s just not in my nature any more. my anons literally can’t relate lol

yes radfems as a group aren’t perfect and we are generally “angry” but so are TRAs. the main difference is we direct our anger outwards rather than inwards. when i was 23 i submitted a letter to Lesbian Connection that included this paragraph that still sums up my views of being a TIF vs radfem completely:

“Realizing that my femaleness was the only thing that determined my gender– that I was born a woman and would die a woman despite not conforming to made up standards created by and for men, liberated me from the chains of believing I had been “born in the wrong body” and needed plastic surgery to fix myself. I was never born wrong and the fault never lay with me– it lay with the patriarchal society we all live in which forces females and males into incredibly limiting boxes.”

#🥸#my posts

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crookedlyinnernightmare · 1 year ago

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the shipwreck arc is kind of crazy with how much it glosses over tbh. a group of highschoolers went missing for like a week and there are almost no consequences because saiko covered it up? come on now.. teruhashi kokomi isn't the kind of girl who can dissapear without sparking a literal national crisis. She got sick one (1) time and the entire school was convinced she was on her death bed. There's no freaking way an extended absence would go well. Especially with the Kokomins. They must've had search parties all over Japan, like come on. Also her brother.. actually now that i think about it that was suchhh a fucked up thing to do to him too. like in the first place theres no way kokomi told him the details of the cruise trip, right? because he would mcfreaking lose it if he knew that she would be on a ship with other boys, including kusuo, isolated in the middle of the ocean overnight. and its not like she can just dip without saying anything, because if she did he would probably call the cops. so maybe she said she would be staying with one of her girl friends, like chiyo. So she leaves and he waits for her to come back, counting down the time to the fucking minute, and she doesn't come. kokomi, who has been stalked frequently in the past. dissapears. he can't reach her phone. if he calls chiyo's family, he'll find out she's missing too. i know makoto's supposed to be the asshole who gets worked up over nothing but this is objectively the correct time to flip out right? like this is objectively fucked up isn't it. eventually kokomi does come back home and.. what? does she tell him the truth about what happened? does she double down on her initial lie? if he realizes she lied to him, would he try to put her on house arrest or some shit? would he channel all of his negative emotions into a different target like kusuo, or saiko who hosted the cruise? wait now that i think about it. between this bullshit and saiko trying to pressure kokomi into marrying him, saiko could really beat out kusuo for the title of "guy makoto hates the most." but saiko has wayy too much money for makoto to do anything to him, so. lol. but anyway what the hell happened between those siblings

#this is just a thought dump and its late (early?) so i am not formatting this. sorry ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#saiki k #teruhashi kokomi #teruhashi makoto #saiko metori

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danicamaximoff · 1 year ago

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Pretend To Be Nice | Chapter Four

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Chapter Four: 70's Funk?

Summary: A few months after forming their band "The Pussycats", Hazel and her friends PJ and Josie get noticed by a record label, and are quickly skyrocketed into fame. It's a dream come true for them, and all three of their lives are flipped upside down. Their quick arrival on the scene quickly draws the attention of many other artists and bands, including a popular girl band called "Nymphology". Unfortunately for Hazel, a mix-up and unintentional awful encounter ends up creating tension between the two groups right before they all leave for Nymphology's upcoming tour. Now forced to frequently interact with someone who she was convinced couldn't stand her, Hazel is desperately trying to fix things with the band's lead guitarist. However it doesn't help that Y/N is actively avoiding Hazel as much as possible, and the fact that Hazel found her insanely hot definitely didn't make things any easier.

Warnings: angst, rockstar au, eventual smut, slowburn, swearing, occasional alcohol mentions/use

Word Count: 4377

“Should we get mac and cheese?” Josie asks as she pushes the shopping cart as her and Hazel wander through the grocery store aisles to get a few snacks and food for their hotel room.

“Like the microwave one or the stove one?” Hazel asks as she furrows her brows.

“Either one.” Josie says as she shrugs.

“Josie, we don't have a stove in the hotel.” Hazel says as she shakes her head. “Or literally any cooking items.”

“You can make boxed mac in the microwave, I do it all the time at Sarah Lawrence.” Josie says with a shrug as she looks at Hazel.

“That sounds disgusting.” Hazel says as she scrunches up her face a bit.

“I mean it tastes the same for the most part, mac is mac. You just have to get the shell ones or sometimes the noodles clump together and then I guess it’s a little weird.” Josie says as she grabs a few boxes of mac and cheese as well as the microwavable cups.

“Do you know when we hear from Wyatt if we get a record deal or not? Oh shit.” Hazel asks as she absentmindedly runs her hand along the shelf tags, eyes going wide as she accidentally knocks a few of them to the ground, mentally panicking as she immediately grabs them and starts trying to put them back in their spots. “Oh hey, we should get gummy worms too.”

“I mean the meeting is today, so we should find out soon.” Josie says as she shrugs. “What happens if they sign us?”

“I dunno? We make a record?” Hazel says as she looks over at Josie.

“No, like, are we staying in the hotel the whole time? I don’t want to live in a hotel.” Josie says as she gives Hazel a look.

“I mean we’d probably get an apartment, wouldn’t we?” Hazel says as she gets a confused look.

“I can’t afford Los Angeles!” Josie says as her eyes go wide in horror. “I can barely afford mac and cheese! How am I supposed to pay for an apartment?”

“Well they would pay us right? Plus it’s cool, if we get signed I can probably ask my mom to chip in or something. I’m pretty sure she has a beach house out here that she vacations at with boyfriends. My dad bought it for her when they were still together as an “I’m Sorry I Cheated” house. I heard them fighting about it in middle school.” Hazel says as she shrugs. “I can see if we can use it or something.”

“You never told me your dad cheated?” Josie asks with a confused and shocked look on her face.

“Well, yeah. You never asked, I didn’t think it was important.” Hazel says as she shrugs.

“I mean, you don’t have to, but I would tell you if something like that happened. You’re one of my best friends.” Josie says with a shrug.

“Wait, really?” Hazel says as she gets a surprised look on her face.

“Hazel, we’re literally in a band together and we hang out all the time.” Josie says as she gives Hazel a funny look.

“Yeah but I thought it’s mostly you and PJ doing stuff and me just tagging along.” Hazel says with a slightly confused look.

“What? No!” Josie says as she gives Hazel a confused look. “Hazel, you’re like the main reason the band exists, and I wouldn’t have come if you didn’t convince me.” Josie says as she shakes her head.

“PJ said you agreed to join the band because she said you’d get a girlfriend.” Hazel says as she frowns and gives Josie a confused look as well.

“Hazel, PJ says a lot of stuff.” Josie says as she rolls her eyes. “I love her, but she just talks to talk half the time. I never even wanted to be in a band, it scares the crap out of me, dude. I know I complained about the bowling alley a lot, but playing at the party was like the worst stage fright I’ve ever experienced.” Josie says as she shakes her head while grabbing a few grocery items off the shelves and into the cart she was pushing.

“But then why’d you-” Hazel starts to say before Josie cuts her off.

“Because I remembered you had always wanted to be in a band. Didn’t you have an obsession with Kiss or something when you were younger?” Josie says as she glances at Hazel.

“I did, I went as Paul Simmons for Halloween one year.” Hazel says as she nods.

“See? That’s why I joined. You love music, and you do all the hard stuff like getting outfits and gigs and everything, I just have to show up and play, which is good because I think if I had any other responsibilities I would crumble under the pressure because I get anxious enough about performing.” Josie says as she shakes her head.

“I thought you guys didn’t like the cat ears?” Hazel says as she furrows her brows in confusion.

“I thought they were kind of fun.” Josie says as she shrugs. “I mean, I wouldn’t have cared if we didn’t wear them, but it was a cool idea. And people liked it and it fits with the band name.” Josie says as she shrugs. “I think it should be part of our outfits.”

“Wait, really?” Hazel asks as her face lights up with excitement. “Why didn’t you tell me I was the reason you joined?”

“Because PJ takes over, so when she says we’re doing this to get girlfriends, you kind of just have to go along with it.” Josie says as she gives Hazel a look.

“I was never doing it to get a girlfriend. I just like the drums.” Hazel says as she furrows her brows.

“Yeah, but you can also say no to PJ, cause you don’t care. She’s my best friend so I just kind of go along with things after a bit.” Josie says as she shrugs.

“Yeah, I guess so.” Hazel says as she shrugs, before realizing something irrelevant to the conversation. “Oh I forgot to tell you, that girl you like is at the same studio as us. You know, the one from Nymphology with the like-” Hazel starts to say as she gestures at her chest where hair would be if she had long hair, but Josie cuts her off as she starts nervously laughing.

“Oh my god, please don’t remind me!” Josie says as she stops walking and leans her head against her arms as they rest on the shopping cart. “I already met her, and I almost threw up.”

“What? You threw up?!” Hazel asks in shock as she gives Josie an alarmed look.

“No! God I would die if I did! I wasn’t being serious! I was just a total idiot when I talked to her!” Josie says as her eyes go wide and she shakes her head.

“What’d you say? I mean it probably wasn’t that bad, you’re a very likeable person.” Hazel says as her face scrunches up in confusion.

“Well I saw her, and I choked on the water I was drinking, and then she came over and asked if I was okay, and I said yeah, and then she was like “I’m Isabel” and I was like “I’m Josie” and then I stared at her for like a second and then looked away, and then I asked if she liked water because I couldn’t think of anything to say.” Josie says awkwardly as she looks up at the ceiling.

“Well did she?” Hazel asks.

“Did she what?” Josie asks Hazel with a confused look.

“Did she like water?” Hazel says as she looks at Josie expectantly.

“Yes. She did. Everyone does, Hazel, you need it to live.” Josie says as she looks at Hazel a bit in disbelief.

“Well now you have something in common!” Hazel says as she smiles a bit, clearly thinking she was being helpful, as Josie sighs and shakes her head.

“We gotta work on how you comfort people, dude.” Josie says as she gives Hazel a look.

“What’s wrong with how I comfort people?” Hazel says as she furrows her brows in confusion.

“It’s not that there’s something wrong, you just-” Josie says before sighing. “I just mean that if you weren’t one of my best friends and I didn’t know you, I would think you’re being a dick and making fun of me.”

“Oh, really? I thought that would be helpful, cause now you have something in common with her.” Hazel says as she shrugs.

“I-” Josie starts to say before stopping and sighing a bit. “Thank you Hazel, that actually is helpful.” Josie says as she nods, though she definitely was just saying that to not make Hazel sad.

“Oh really? Sick!” Hazel says with a grin. “Oh you know what you should do? Mention moss! Because it can help you find water! And then you have two things to talk about!” Hazel says excitedly as they continue shopping.

“Hi mom!” Hazel says into the phone excitedly from her hotel room, feeling like she was about to pass out. She had just got back from the meeting with the record label, and The Pussycats had officially been signed for a three year contract, and if their first album did well, then that would most likely be extended. They started recording the rest of the album tomorrow, and the label agreed to pay for the hotel for the time being until the three of them found a place to live in.

“Hi sweetheart! How are you!” Hazel’s mom says into the phone, sounding like she was yelling for some reason.

“Are you yelling? Why are you talking weird?” Hazel says with a confused tone.

“I’m on my elliptical right now, but I have a face mask and I’m doing that cucumber thing on my eyes! Annie said it will help with my bags and the dark circles! Annie, say hi to Hazel!” Her mom says over the phone, talking to her best friend Annie.

“Hi Hazel! How’s college?” Annie says in the background.

“No, Annie, she’s not at Sarah Lawerence right now, for that… that band thing.” Hazel’s mom says over the phone.

“Oh that’s right! How’s LA? Have you met Robert Downey Jr. yet?” Annie asks in the background, yelling as well.

“I’m here for music stuff, not movies.” Hazel says into the phone as she shakes her head.

“It could happen! If you meet him, tell him I’m single!” Annie yells, which makes Hazel roll her eyes.

“Yeah, sure, okay anyways, mom can I tell you my news now?” Hazel says impatiently.

“Yes, of course sweetheart! What is it? Annie shut up.” Her mom says over the phone.

“We got a record deal! The contract is for three years!” Hazel says excitedly, and her mother gasps over the phone.

“Oh my goodness! That’s amazing!” Her mom yells over the phone, though still clearly exercising as she talks. “Annie, did you hear that? Hazel’s going to be a musician!”

“Yeah, I know! We start recording the album tomorrow!” Hazel says excitedly as she grins.

“That’s wonderful, sweetheart!” Her mom yells. “Siri! Siri! Si-Ri!” Her mom beggins yelling clearly trying to get her phone’s voice assistant to activate. “Annie why is Siri not working?”

“Mom, why do you need Siri?” Hazel asks as she furrows her brows in confusion.

“I need to set a reminder to book a flight to LA!” She says to Hazel.

“What? Why?” Hazel asks, clearly confused by her mother’s sudden plans.

“Hazel, you’re going to be famous! I want to be there to see my little Witch Hazel spread her wings!” Her mom says into the phone, using a nickname from when Hazel was little, which makes Hazel groan.

“Mom, please stop calling me that! I’m not five anymore!” Hazel says with embarrassment.

“Siri! Siri! Oh for Christ's sake, Annie, I’m taking the cucumbers off.” Hazel’s mom says, before shuffling noise is heard as she seemingly grabs the phone. “Let me find a good flight, and I’ll fly out as soon as I can sweetheart!” She says excitedly, her voice significantly closer to the phone and not yelling as much since she was now holding the phone.

“No, mom you really don’t-” Hazel starts to say before her mom cuts her off.

“Do you girls need somewhere to stay? I assume you can’t be in a hotel the whole time.” Hazel’s mom says over the phone, which makes Hazel perk up.

“Yeah, actually! That’s part of why I called, I was wondering if we can rent out the beach house or something instead of getting an apartment, because PJ and Josie can’t afford rent out here.” Hazel says quickly. “We’d take really good care of it! We wouldn’t ruin it!”

“Oh, yeah, of course! We can sign you up for surfing lessons too, so you can be a California girl and get the full experience!” Hazel’s mom says with an excited tone.

“Oh I don’t really-” Hazel starts to say before she gets cut off again.

“No, no, no, trust me! You’ll want surfing lessons sweetheart! It’s very rockstar! Plus the instructors are usually hot. I had one a few years ago, what was his name?” Hazel’s mom says as she thinks for a second. “Well, I can’t remember, but I do remember he was very hot! We hooked up a lot that summer, he-” Hazel’s mom starts to say, before Hazel cuts her off.

“Ew, mom! I don’t want to hear about that!” Hazel says with a disgusted look on her face.

“Sorry! Sorry!” Her mom says defensively. “I’m just saying! They’re usually very hot!”

“Mom, I don’t even like men, you know this!” Hazel says, still disgusted at the topic.

“There’s girl instructors too!” Hazel’s mom says over the phone.

“Mom- I- No! I don’t- Can we go back to talking about the beach house?” Hazel says as she stumbles over her words.

“Alright, alright! I’m letting it go! Of course you can use the beach house sweetheart, we can work out all the details when I fly out. Anyways I have to go, I have a decorative bead making class in an hour and I have to change out of my workout clothes. I’ll text you the flight plans once I book it! I love you!” Hazel’s mom says before hanging up the phone, leaving Hazel confused.

“Decorative bead making class?” Hazel says to herself with confusion as Josie and PJ enter the hotel room.

“Hazel, there were the hottest girls at the pool just now, one of them was totally into me! I told you guys this was a good idea!” PJ says excitedly as she throws her towel down on one of the chairs in the hotel room.

“They looked at us like once, PJ.” Josie says as she gives PJ a look.

“Yeah and it was a “I’m totally into you” kind of look!” PJ says as she throws her arms up and looks at Josie. “Oh, Hazel, have you called your mom yet?” She asks as she flops down on the couch.

“Yeah! She said we can move into the beach house!” Hazel says with a smile.

“Fuck yeah!” PJ says excitedly as she punches the air.

“Hey guys? Have we like, put thought into what songs are going on the album?” Josie asks as she grabs a soda from the mini fridge.

“Shit!” PJ says as she sits up a bit.

“I mean I have, but it’s not-” Hazel starts to say as PJ cuts her off.

“Write it down! We need to have a plan for tomorrow! Fuck, Josie! Why’d you make me go to the pool!” PJ says as she panics a bit, as Josie throws her arm up in annoyance, as going to the pool had been PJ’s idea.

“Fuck, that’s not right.” Hazel says as she frowns and scribbles out the notes she wrote on the music sheet. She bites on her pencil for a moment as she thinks, before setting it down and readjusting the electric guitar she was holding and playing different note sequences over again as she tries to figure out the guitar part for a song.

She was currently the only one in the studio, PJ and Josie had left about thirty minutes ago to go grab dinner, but Hazel had stayed behind, determined to figure out this new song they were working on that had her stumped. She had already figured out the general beat and the chorus, but the more fine details and actual instrumentals to the song was frustrating her, as she couldn’t seem to figure out a vibe that she liked and matched with the vision she had for the song. Josie and PJ had tried to convince her to take a break, but she refused to leave until she figured this out, so here she was, alone with one of the electric guitars as she ran over the same section over and over again, trying to come up with something she liked.

It had been about a week and a half since being signed, and they had been working constantly on the album, picking which songs, discussing with Wyatt, and had even decided to come up with a few new ones per Wyatt’s suggestion, giving them advice and his thoughts on what the album was missing.

Staring off into space, she hums the general vibe of the song she had so far to herself, her fingers absentmindedly tap against the base of the guitar as she bites her lip a bit and thinks. Lost in thought, she doesn’t notice the sound of the door to the studio opening as she begins playing another random string of notes on the guitar, her brows furrowed in concentration.

“Is that for the album?” Y/N asks from the door, as she leans against the doorframe, making Hazel jump in her seat a bit.

“Oh my god, hi!” She says as she quickly turns and sees Y/N, heart immediately racing.

“Hi.” Y/N says as she grins softly. “They leave you in here by yourself?” She asks as she looks around at the empty recording studio.

“Oh, yeah. Josie and PJ went to go grab food but I wanted to stay and work on this new song we’re writing.” Hazel says as she smiles, trying not to show how nervous she is.

“Can I hear it? I promise I won’t steal it.” Y/N says with a small laugh, a teasing grin on her face that makes Hazel’s stomach do cartwheels.

“Oh it’s not- I mean- it’s- I’m still working on it. It’s in shambles right now.” Hazel says, nervously stumbling over her words.

“That’s okay, I won’t judge.” Y/N says with a laugh as she shakes her head.

“Oh, I mean- uh, yeah sure, if you really want to then.” Hazel says as she nods a bit.

“Yeah, show me what you got so far.” She says with a smile as she walks inside, the studio door closing behind her as she goes and sits down on one of the chairs near Hazel.

“Okay, yeah. Um, so this song is supposed to be like towards the end of the album kind of. A lot of our songs are like in the alternative category, but Wyatt said we should add more variety to what we have so far, so we added a few slower ones, and for this one, PJ said she wanted it to be more “funky” but not 70’s, and I don’t really know what that means. We don’t even have all the lyrics either, it’s very unfinished right now.” Hazel says as she nervously runs a hand through her hair, avoiding eye contact with Y/N.

“What are you working on right now?” Y/N asks as she scoots a bit closer to see what Hazel had written down so far. “I can try and help if you want.”

“Really?” Hazel asks as she looks at her in shock.

“Yeah.” Y/N says as she smiles and nods her head. “Nymphology finished recording for the day, I was heading out but I saw someone was in here so I wanted to say hi in case it was you.”

“Why me?” Hazel asks, both in shock and confusion.

“Well we didn’t really get to talk a few weeks ago, and I’m curious about the moss thing now, because I think it was Josie? But anyways, one of the girls in my band is named Isabel, and apparently Josie brought up moss the other day.” Y/N says as she laughs a bit. “I’m just curious now if that’s like a friend group thing or not.”

“No! It’s not! It’s my thing! I told Josie about it because she likes Isabel so I said she should bring up moss because they both like water, so it connects, and that’s what I do.” Hazel says quickly as she shakes her head, before her eyes go wide as she realizes what she said. “Shoot, don’t tell her I said that.” She says as Y/N laughs.

“So you bring up moss as a flirting tactic?” Y/N asks with a grin, which makes Hazel panic.

“What? What- No! No, I don’t- Sometimes, but like-” Hazel says as she immediately stumbles over her words and blushes a bit. “Anyways the song!” She says quickly as she turns back to the paper she had been writing on. What is wrong with me?! She thinks to herself as Y/N giggles. She was rarely like this around girls. Fuck. She seriously needed to ignore the fact that Y/N was super pretty and get her game back. Except when she actually thought about it, that was definitely very impossible. Double fuck. “Anyways, this is the part I’m trying to figure out right now.” Hazel says as she nervously runs her hand through her hair again before readjusting the guitar again, internally just a jumbled mess on nerves and anxiety as she begins playing what she had so far on the guitar.

“And your friend said she wanted it to be what? Funky but not 70’s?” Y/N asks after thinking for a minute, a quizzical expression on her face.

“Yeah.” Hazel says softly as she avoids eye contact, glancing all over, eyes falling on Y/N’s shoes though, as the red converse had a lot of doodles all over them.

“Can I see what else you have?” Y/N asks, a bit more serious now as Hazel hands her the papers and notes without saying anything. She reads over, her fingers tapping against the paper as she figures out the beat and the drum parts Hazel had so far. “I think the only “funky” kind of part should be the guitar. But even then less funky and more fun. Do you listen to Paramore?” She asks as she looks over at Hazel.

“Wh- Yeah, I do.” Hazel says as her head snaps up and she nods.

“I don’t know if this will make sense, but maybe coming up with something that sounds like how their album cover for After Laughter looks?” Y/N says as she shrugs and furrows her brows a bit.

“I- That does actually, yeah.” Hazel says as she nods.

“Like, hold on, let me think.” Y/N says as she furrows her brows for a moment. “Can I see that quick?” She asks as she gestures to the guitar.

“Oh, yeah, here.” Hazel says as she hands her the guitar, heart unintentionally racing a bit as their hands accidentally brush against each other.

They spend a while going over random chord progressions and different melodies, until after a while, they had created a pretty solid backbone for the guitar part of the song, that Hazel and the others could flesh out more later. As time goes on Hazel gradually relaxes more, being able to focus on the song and music helping her distract herself from her nerves, and allowing her to start cracking jokes more and actually engage in conversation outside of the song and music stuff.

By the time Josie and PJ arrive, Y/N was telling Hazel about crazy fan experiences, and wild things that had happened to her and her friends over the years, laughing as she mentions the time she had created a fake twitter account and started beef with herself and how pissed the fans got at her burner account.

“Hey, Hazel- Oh. Hi?” PJ says as she walks in, doing a double take when she sees Y/N.

“Hi.” Y/N says with a smile as she looks over at PJ and Josie. “I’m Y/N. I’m friends with Hazel.” She says as she smiles and gestures to Hazel, the statement making Hazel smile.

“We know. You’re in Nymphology.” Josie says as she nods a bit nervously.

“Mhmm.” Y/N says with a nod. “You’re Josie, right?”

“Oh, uh, yeah.” Josie says as she nods.

“Isabel’s told me about you.” Y/N says with a small giggle, making Josie blush and get a nervous smile on her face as she looks away, clearly worried about the fact Isabel had mentioned her to her bandmates.

“I’m PJ!” PJ quickly says as she stares at Y/N.

“Anyways, um, you should probably go, thanks for the help.” Hazel says quickly as she gathers the papers scattered around them.

“Oh, yeah of course, anytime.” Y/N says with a smile.

“Yeah, yeah, thanks. It was fun, I’ll see you soon probably.” Hazel says as she quickly gets up, immediately nervous and embarrassed again now that PJ and Josie were there.

“If you need any more help, let me know. It was nice meeting you guys.” Y/N says to Hazel before turning and smiling to PJ and Josie as she walks out, shutting the door behind her after waving bye.

“What the fuck?” PJ says in shock as her and Josie immediately look at Hazel, who was now heavily blushing as she fiddles with the shirt she was wearing.

I genuinely love writing this story its sm fun. I love Hazel she's so cute. Also I fr have no clue how record label stuff works so I'm kinda just pulling this out of my ass lmao. I'm like "yeah I watched Daisy Jones and The Six and can google basic steps for this, good enough" and then just hoped it would be accurate dfdhsfkjhej. dividers from @saradika and @animatedglittergraphics-n-more graphic made by me lol

#hazel callahan #hazel bottoms #bottoms hazel #hazel x reader #bottoms movie #ruby cruz #hazel callahan x reader #ruby cruz x reader #danicamaximoff #hazel callahan fluff #hazel callahan smut #rockstar au #hazel callahan x you #bottoms 2023

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daichiduskdrop · 1 year ago

Text

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚⋆·˚ ༘ *𝙎𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙡 ⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

Chapter 36

Pairing: BTS Ot7 X fem! reader

Genre: A/B/O AU, Fluff, Angst, Strangers to lovers,

Warnings: none :)

Words: 3949

A/N: Hi everyone! So sorry for such a long, unannounced break. I needed to take some time off. The updates will probably be less frequent, but I'll try my best to post.

Also, if there are any mistakes regarding the story line not lining up, please let me know! I might have forgotten about something and not realised! :( (Cupcake reveal is coming soon dw!)

How are you? I hope you well and care.

Taglist: @thelilbutifulthings @ilovemoneymorethenmen @singukieee @cherrysainttt @felicityroth @mageprincess7 @lucis-noctiana @danielle143 @osakis-gf @girl-nahh @vintageoldfashionstyle-blog @neverthefirstchoice @juju-227592 @silentreadersthings @i-have-no-life-charlie @everyonehatesshani @iamkookiesforyou @dragons-flare @fangirl125reader @roseidol @frieschan @popcatx0 @liz67900 @exfolitae @plexcaffeinate @strawblueberrys

(open)

⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ *

Jungkook nor Yoongi could help but gush and coo over you. Not only were their protective and alpha headspaces triggered by your still-dropped form, but just seeing you tightly cuddle up to the packalpha made their hearts flutter.

The youngest alpha held you close, gently fretting over you. Sure, you have cried yourself to sleep, but he couldn't help himself.

You were their courted omega, hopefully one day their own truly, and it really upsets them whenever you would cry or drop in their presence.

Frankly, it broke their hearts, shattered even, knowing that they were meant to be there to calm you down and make sure you were okay.

They didn't have as much experience with omegas as they might have thought they did before they got to meet you and start the courting—gosh, they were so wrong.

Of course, Jungkook's friend Juwon had an omega in his pack, but the youngest alpha never really got around to truly talk to him that often.

When the pack would hold meet and greets and see their fans up close, they got to meet all of the different second genders at once, so they have seen many omegas to be truthful, it was quite usual.

Only when a different K-pop group, not as well known as BTS but having a pretty large fan base, promoted and held their own meet and greet, and a terrible accident happened, did the whole industry shaken.

While crowds were known to unsettle and frighten omegas, as well as the loud noises, many fans just wanted to see the idols and would take the risk.

And it got especially risky when the price of the entrance was too high for the whole pack to get, ending with sometimes just the omega by themselves.

When the meet and greet of the K-pop group happened, it was quite a few years ago. Back then, one of the band members has suffered an injury, making them unable to participate.

Though, as the group felt bad for the short notice, they didn't want to leave any of their fans in dissapointment, and so the injured member came over to quickly wave at everyone and chat for a short while before they were ushered away again—or so was the plan.

As the leader of the group came over to see their sweet fans, the overpacked room was filled with loud shouts of excitement and joy, though quickly turning into cries of distress and worry.

The mass of fans moved over quickly, and so many of the naturally smaller or shorter ones started to get pushed around and would stumble, eventually ending in many of them tripping and falling over.

The giant group of fans of all different scents, which just confused everyone in general, alphas, betas, and omegas all included, was too much for anyone to be able to truly notice the source of fans distress.

The chaos and panic only continued as the idols tried to calm everyone down. The leader, though injured, stayed behind to try and help, but the room was far too full, and there was soon just a mess.

The K-pop group disbanded soon after, ending their contracts after the terrible news of the two fans who were suffocated and stepped over until they had to be taken to a hospital.

Their identities haven't been revealed to protect them, though after a long while, the constant questions and worries regarding their well-being ended with a final message.

While one was on a good path to recovery, the other, a young omega boy, has ended up in a coma and seems not to be about to wake up any time soon. The pack that the omega was with took it the worst, for sure.

And so, after the terrible incident, which ended with many unsettled cries and shouts, a death, and many things to worry about, most of the meet and greets of all groups have been postponed.

Eventually, all that has purchased or won a ticket in some way has been refunded, until about a year or so forward since the accident, when the first meet and greet in the entire industry was held again.

This time, though, the rules applied were so much more strict and harsh, as only about half of the people who usually got to go were allowed, much less tickets sold.

And the biggest difference of all was that the event was only for betas and alphas.

Truthfully, no alpha in the right mind would dare let their omega go to such an event after the terrible news, too worried it could happen to their own too.

Nowadays, events where the idols interact the most with their fans are still usually held for alphas and betas only. A separate event is then held for omegas, but it is required to go with the packalpha of their pack.

The rules have become stricter in order to keep everyone safe.

Jungkook knew very well that he would have to always look out for you and take care of everything for you, but the alpha realised that was, honestly, something he found so fulfilling and rewarding.

And so, the young alpha held you to his chest, his own scent gland carefully close to your nose as he rested your face against the crook of his neck, cradling you close.

Yoongi wasn't much better, constantly combing his fingers through your hair gently, with little soothing pecks left on your forehead and your head.

The older alpha held your palm in his, his thumb softly rubbing over your knuckles in hopes of calming you and keeping you reminded of his presence, even if you weren't too aware at the moment.

Soon, Jungkook sighed out. After you truly smelled like all three of them, he stood up with you in his arms.

„Jungkook-”

„Let's go home, Hyung; I want to take babybun home.” The youngest didn't look over to the packalpha, too caught up with watching over you.

Namjoon sighed. Truly, there wasn't anything more he wished for more than to have you safe and sound in their packhouse right now.

The packalpha wished they would have the den to have you nest and calm down in, but they didn't, and so they would have to deal with it.

Sharing quick goodbyes with Yuki and Moonsik, which both understood well and promised to not be bothered or upset, the three alphas went on to leave.

They made quick work, shuffling through the lightly busy mall, both Namjoon and Yoongi watchful and protective over you in Jungkook's arms.

Whoever seemed to just glance over for a second too long received a harsh glare back or a sudden release of very agitated pheromones, scaring them off.

And so, the pack went up the small stairs to the underground parking lot, with Yoongi's car in view soon enough when the oldest alpha led them over.

He wanted to keep you in his arms for a while longer, but seeing how the youngest quickly shuffled to the backseat the moment he unlocked the Hyundai, he would just have to wait.

Since Namjoon didn't drive, Yoongi would, and so he sighed again, turning on the engine as he waited for everyone to buckle in.

„Kook, you can't sit with your pup on your lap. That's not safe for either of you."

The packalpha said, his voice gentle and calm. Joon understood the youngest very well and knew he was in a headspace that was too hard for him to leave for now.

Jungkook needed to keep you close; he needed to feel you against his chest, your heartbeat, your scent—to know you were safe and sound.

And so he let a light growl leave him the moment the packalpha turned around to try and pry off his strong hold onto you. The youngest didn't realise it was his hyung, and even that wouldn't matter that much now.

„Yah! Jungkook, stop this.” A much rougher Yoongi called out, just wanting to leave. He wanted you to be in their packhouse now, safe, with only them around, not all of these strangers in the mall to oogle at.

„Hyung-”

„No, we really need to go now. 'Mega will be next to you the whole drive.” And so Namjoon gently took you from the youngest arms, sliding you over so you would sit next to the alpha, your thighs touching.

As he buckled you in, he tugged on your seatbelt carefully, knowing you would be safe this way.

Namjoon closed the doors again, and as he took a seat at the front once more, he could see your head now resting against the alpha's shoulder, the youngest watchful eyes set on your form.

And so, the small group left the mall and started driving the short way to their packhouse.

The soft, omega headspace playlist was turned on, the alphas hoping you might calm down further even when you were asleep, your cheeks rosy and a bit puffy from crying your eyes out earlier.

"...what happened, Namjoon?” Yoongi asked calmly, his eyes set on the road. The snow was still around and pretty to look at. The alpha wished you would look at yourself and smile at how nice it was...

The packalpha wasn't sure himself, and so he only shook his head lightly, lost in thought. Surely, you would have to talk to them about everything later; this was important.

„...Have you called the others yet?” He asked his elder, and the said alpha was shaking his head likewise. „No, we rushed here...but we should probably call ahead."

And so Namjoon made quick work with the touchscreen, calling the eldest alpha of their pack, whom he hoped stayed home.

„Hello?”

„Hyung, we are on our way home now.”

The packalpha said, unsure as to how to really describe what went down without the eldest freaking out fully.

„Okay-”

„Y/N dropped, could you maybe set some stuff up?"

And so Namjoon ripped off the bandage, hoping Seokjin would understand—he knew he would.

„I- What? Is she okay? What happened?” With each question, the urgency in his voice doubled, and in the background of the call, there could be some shuffling heard.

„I don't know Hyung. She is with us now; we will be home soon.” Namjoon said calmly, rethinking every single step he and you took earlier.

You seemed so joyful too, telling him about this and that as you skipped along with him, happy and seemingly carefree.

The packalpha took a short look behind himself, seeing Jungkook carefully caress your hair and leave soft pecks everywhere now and then.

If it weren't for your still distressed scent, you might look peaceful and relaxed, but the alphas knew better.

And so Jin said his goodbyes, telling them to give you a peck for him and to have you stay strong.

They weren't much further from home; the Hyundai was just entering the expensive neighborhood, so it didn't take much longer before they arrived.

The snow crumbled and cracked under the tyres as Yoongi carefully parked, very watchful since he was driving the most precious cargo of his.

As soon as the engine turned off, the alphas went to shuffle out—not before the front doors of their packhouse were thrown open, though, with the rest of the alphas rushing over.

„Babycheeks?” The second youngest called out his eyes wide in worry as he came over. Jungkook was just about to climb out with you tightly held to his chest.

„Oh my gosh, princess-!” The other alpha gasped, seeing your still puffy cheeks and the pout you sported even during your sleep.

The youngest reluctantly let the oldest take you into his arms instead, Seokjins eyes roaming over your figure to see any possible damage, but to find none.

„Aigoo, babycub, come to alpha...” He whispered softly, pulling you even closer if that was possible.

With you safely tucked away in his arms, the alpha was quick to start the short walk back inside, with the rest of the men following trying to get at least a bit of their scent onto you.

Yea, you had them wrapped around your little finger, but they didn't put up a fight.

The moment Jimin and Jin started to untie your shoelaces, you stirred, your vision slightly blurry. Your head pounded, and a soft sniffle left you.

Immediately, both of the alphas and all the others which were currently discarding their own coats and jackets looked over, worry and care swimming in everyone's eyes.

Jimin was the quickest out of his daze, putting the pretty snow boot they got for you away, going from crouching before your sitting position to standing up a bit taller.

The alpha took you into his arms, picking you up to hold to his chest, his chin tucking your head away into the crook of his neck.

„Sh-sh-shhh princess, alpha is here now...” He whispered softly, your arms wrapped around his shoulders as Jin helped put away the other boot.

The packmembers stayed mostly quiet, watchful and worried, sad eyes set on you. They knew more than well, that something was wrong, but they could feel that this was not the right time to ask about it.

„How about a nap little pup?” The packalpha said gently, coming over to brush some of your hair behind your ear, his motions gentle and calm.

It wasn't truly a question, more of an advice he, and all of the rest, hoped you would follow. The tiny nod you gave in answer, before your cheek rested against Jimin's collarbone was more than enough.

And so, the young alpha trotted over to the living room, where in a quick haste Jin and Hobi brought over blankets and pillows of all kind, the two scent plushies and even a few of each hoodies.

To be truthful, the large couch was covered in all of their scents and so when Jimin gently placed you down in middle of the blankets, he was slightly surprised that you wouldn't let go.

His scent was quite literally all around you, he has scented you well too, just a short while earlier, so what was it?

„...stay, oppa...” You whispered, your voice laced with sadness and timidness, having the alpha immediately do whatever you wished for with no such worry.

And so, he crawled in behind you, his back against the backrest with you tightly pulled to his warm chest.

The rest of the packmembers eventually all walked over, each of the alphas making sure to give you as many sweet pecks as they saw fit, their eyes sweet and careful.

„Rest for a little while sunny-bub, alpha will be in his studio okay?” Hoseok whispered sweetly, his nose rubbing up against yours in a cute bunny-like kiss.

Truly, he was worried about you, deeply. Whatever set you off today was surely a bigger issue they would have to go over eventually, but for now, you just needed to have a nice rest of the day.

The alpha didn't feel comfortable having you out of sight for after your sudden drop, but he felt a bit better with Jimin staying with you. He would keep you safe.

And so, he left a soft peck on your forehead, hoping that your still bleary eyes would soon shut and you would enter a calmer dreamland.

Jungkook planned to go work out this afternoon, together with Namjoon, Yoongi and Jin, but the plans seemed to have changed, and for a great reason.

The youngest couldn't help but worry for you so much, like possibly never before, constantly smothering and cooing over your tightly cuddled up form.

Somehow, he couldn't leave you right now, the moment he wanted to get up from the crouched up form, he felt a pang right against his heart and could swear he heard just the tiniest whine come from your direction - and he was right back down next to you to scent you.

„Rest with them for a while Kook, you'll feel better.” Namjoon said knowingly, patting the young alpha's shoulder in understanding.

The packalpha wasn't much better, as he took a seat to the side of you, making sure you were safely tucked away underneath the blankets with both of those scent lambs in your arms.

And so, Jungkook layed down next to you, making sure your ear would rest right against his heartbeat in hopes of it to settle you down better.

Whenever anyone would come closer, the youngest alpha was wide awake, his arms tightly wrapped around you as you napped with Jimin too asleep behind you.

It was Jin this time, the eldest coming over with two coffee mugs in hand, handing one to the packalpha who thanked him quietly.

The oldest alpha took a seat next to Namjoon who was currently typing away on his notebook, though while Jungkook believed it was work related, turned out to be a scent-keychain website.

„Oh, that one is really cute, how about it?” Seokjin mused softly, careful so that his voice wouldn't wake you up. You needed to rest, for at least a little while.

The alpha pointed to the screen where a little teddy bear keychain with a cute, pink tie-up snow hat showed. Surely you would like one like this one?

Namjoon hummed softly, clicking onto the listing to see a specific description.

Introducing our luxurious Scent Plushie Keychain, the perfect accessory for omegas in search of a comforting connection to their pack members. Crafted from an incredibly soft and comfortable luxury material, this keychain is designed to provide a sensory experience unlike any other.

Measuring at approximately 10 cm in size, our Scent Plushie Keychain is small enough to be conveniently carried with you wherever you go. Whether it's attached to your keys, backpack, or stored in your pocket, this keychain ensures that you'll always have a piece of your pack member's scent close at hand.

Created specifically for omegas, the Scent Plushie Keychain allows you to hold onto not just one, but up to five different scents. This means you can carry the comforting aromas of multiple pack members, strengthening the bond between you and your pack.

Each of these scents is carefully preserved, allowing you to experience a rush of familiar emotions whenever you need it most. Whether you're feeling anxious, lonely, or simply need a moment of comfort, a quick sniff of your Scent Plushie Keychain can transport you back to a place of safety and security.

With its exquisite craftsmanship and attention to detail, this Scent Plushie Keychain is designed to be a cherished item, passed down through generations. It not only serves as a physical reminder of your pack members but also as an emblem of your unique place within your pack.

So why wait? Indulge yourself in the ultimate luxury for omegas with our Scent Plushie Keychain. Carry the scents of your pack members with you at all times, and let their comforting aroma surround you, even when they're physically far away. Experience the power of scent as you immerse yourself in the warmth and love of your pack, no matter where life takes you.

„That sounds perfect.” Jin whispered satisfied, it sounded really nice. It looked cute and surely you would like it. All that was left for them to choose their own ones to carry and you would be much safer in the future.

„Yea but look...” The packalpha said softly, opening a cleverly designed to conceal link, which unrolled another further information.

Product Warning:

Before purchasing our Plushie Keychain, we want to ensure that you have all the necessary information to make an informed decision. While our Plushie Keychain is designed with the intention of providing comfort and connection to omegas, it's important to exercise caution and consider the specific needs of your omega partner or self.

This Plushie Keychain has the capacity to hold up to five scents, allowing you to incorporate the comforting aromas of your pack members. However, it is crucial to first consult with your omega to determine if this is the right approach for them. Each omega has unique needs and preferences when it comes to emotional support, and the use of scents may not be suitable or effective for everyone.

We recommend engaging in open and honest communication with your omega partner to understand their specific desires and boundaries. Discussing their comfort level with scent-based items is essential before incorporating our Plushie Keychain into your dynamic.

While our Plushie Keychain can be a wonderful tool for fostering a sense of connection and comfort, it is crucial to respect the boundaries and preferences of your omega. If your omega expresses any discomfort or hesitation regarding the use of scents or this product specifically, we encourage you to explore alternative methods of support that align with their needs.

Remember, the well-being and emotional health of your omega should always be prioritized. Understanding and respecting their preferences is key to maintaining a healthy and thriving bond within the omegaverse.

Please exercise caution, engage in open dialogue, and ensure that the use of our Plushie Keychain aligns with the needs and desires of your omega partner or self. Together, you can navigate the omegaverse and nurture a strong and fulfilling connection.

„See? It only holds 5 scents, we need more...but everything else checks the list.” He said, slight dissapointment lacing his voice. Jin frowned, watching Namjoon exit the tab again, going back to the photo listings.

The eldest alpha stayed by for a while longer, the two together narrowing down the search using the filter to show only the 7+ scents options.

Much less options showed then, but still, the alphas eventually agreed on a MIFFY keychain, the packalpha adding it to the cart.

Soon after, Namjoon chose his own keychain he would keep around in case you would need to help get settled. Jin chose one himself, but they waited for the others to make their choice.

Just as the eldest went to ask Yoongi and Hoseok with Taehyung to take a look, the second oldest and youngest preparing spring rolls, you stirred.

Your eyes fluttered open, a soft yawn leaving you. You went to rub your eye with a loosely closed fist, only to have the packalpha lean over immediately.

„Sh-sh-shh, go back to sleep little pup, alpha is right here. I'm not going anywhere sweetheart...”

He said gently, placing your hand back beside the scent-toy, noticing Jungkook's half asleep eyes set on your form.

You whined softly, having the youngest lean over the right very moment, his nose and chin rubbing vigorously over your cheeks and face.

„It's okay babybun, oppa is here...” He whispered, his sweet eyes set on your form.

„B-But oppa...” You whispered, your voice a bit shallow and raspy from all the sobs and crying you did earlier.

At the sound of your voice, all the attention was onto you, Namjoon stopped the carefully tucking of the many blankets around you, his eyes gentle on your form.

„How about alpha reads for you for a bit then, hm? Come here my littlest pup, alpha will keep you safe...” He said softly, caressing your hair.

You whined out but still, nodded in agreement, letting the packalpha gently lift up your head to set onto his lap as he got comfortable.

With a pillow underneath you he so carefully set up for you, Namjoon sighed in content, relief clouding his mind. You were talking and you told them what you needed, even when not fully and completely.

You would be okay.

⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ *

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