#i was a tradwife too

[lindstromm]

The OTHER worry for tradwives is that it will work just fine. You stay married. You stay home. Your whole life. Your entire life revolves around your kids, who resent you for it (jeez, mom, get a life and leave me alone). Your husband criticizes your parenting and how you spend his money. You not only take care of your husband and children, but you'll be expected to take care of your parents as they age. Your other siblings have jobs, you see. You haven't worked in 25 years and have zero self-confidence about finding a job. He'll never file for divorce. You'll never file for divorce. Losing yourself in service to others is high and noble, until you realize you're entirely lost.

[angelsaxis]

"...[W]e must continue to challenge the societal arrangements that leads to preventable pain and suffering. Marriage can be quite beautiful and sacred, for example. Marriage can also privatize dependence: it encourages people to enter relationships for resources and benefits, like health care, savings, and tax deductions. I was nineteen years old when I got married, mostly informed by my faith tradition. I was also in love, but very poor, and marriage offered me a stability that I never had as a child. I was so lucky that the person I married was kind, thoughtful, and also very much trying to figure out his relationship to Christianity and his evolving manhood.

When we divorced nine years later and became friends and co-parents, I realized how the marital benefits I once aspire dot have did not make sense. I could remove him from my health insurance to account for the divorce, but I couldn't add any of my uninsured siblings, whom I would be related to forever. And our children had two options for insurance because they had parents who went to college and worked jobs that offered it, but independent contractors in my family did not have an option that wasn't a financial sacrifice.

If we focused on meeting the healthcare, employment, educational, and housing needs of people in society, then those who want to marry could more freely enter those relationships in their terms, and people who needed to escape because of violence could more easily leave without worrying what will happen if they get sick and need to see a doctor.

We should heed to calls for investment in the programs, opportunities, and laws that make everyone free and safe. Here too, universal basic income can help, allowing people to meet their basic needs and not rely on potentially sexually exploitative intimate relationships for income. Removing benefits from marriage accomplishes this, too. With universal health care, and other programs like free and quality childhood education, people vulnerable to violence have more free range to move, live, and practice healthy lifestyles."

-- Becoming Abolitionists: Police, Protests, and the Pursuit of Freedom by Derecka Purnell

[lifeaspect]

they're perfect for each other

[trans-xianxian]

wei wuxian in second on that poll that's like which genderbent male character would be a tradwife is crazy. homophobia so strong you forgot what happened in the story and the most basic, easy to digest traits of the character in question

[mermaidsirennikita]

I find it really fascinating that older romance novels are often cast as these problematic (and they can be! Basically zero books age perfectly, I'll always say) misogyny fests with heroines who have no agency, are submissive little always-virgins...

When tbh, I find a lot more variety in terms of personality and morality in heroines from heroines written 10+ years ago compared to today. And honestly? A lot of them are also more active in their stories.

Now—how much does this have to do with the stories generally being higher stakes as well? Not sure. But reading Paradise, a book that came out in the early 90s, the heroine is wholeheartedly a sweet person, but she's not perfect, and she has way more agency and forward momentum than I read in a lot of contemporary romance novels right now.

[simple-and-cozy-life]

Can't wait to be a mom someday

[dollypopup]

I think it's real obvious that if you actually like Colin you don't belong in the Polin fandom. y'all are all so ableist about him and think the absolute worst of him and a huge number of the posts and fics are romanticizing Penelope straight up abusing him

we should make a new tag because this one is NOT it

[horsemeatluvr23]

i think watching bdubs videos is the closest i've ever come to being convinced by organised religion

[maretriarch]

female separatism is a fake meme opinion to have and not one anyone is actually doing, considering, or feeling. it exists only as a snarky one sentence comment to leave on political tiktoks.

[wedding-shemp]

when modernizing Batman villains (or any villains really), a lot of people go the revisionist route and say "what if they were actually just misunderstood?" And while this isn't a strictly invalid reading and it has the potential to be interesting, I find more often than no it's just a lazy shortcut to avoid having to do any real work, and it has the effect of flattening the characters out. I would much prefer to see these characters updated for a modern audience by reimagining them as the kind of villains that plague contemporary life. For example, I think the Riddler should be a Joe Rogan-esque podcast host.

[fireworkss-exe]

my stepmom is actually so racist it's insane. she once said that immigrants brought curse words to america???

[schalotte]

i really do believe this guy is gonna take 4-6 months to grade my 5 page paper and it's not like i need the grade for anything but it's pissing me off esp cause the grade is supposed to also factor in the in-class presentations we did in, like, june. in november when he finally gets to reading my paper he will obviously not remember what i said then, and i know he didn't make up his mind about a preliminary grade back then because i asked him and he said he'd have to factor in the paper. annoying!!!!!!

[andragoras-in-vanity]

im convinced that people who actually want to live in cities and dont see the environmental and emotional trauma their inflicting on themselves by enabling those places to continue to grow have just the most severe brain damage

[postmanlinksbootyshorts]

takut0wa shippers are so insecure and annoying, it's genuinely so fucking funny that i can't even be mad fr

[apricot-the-apricat]

Ara enjoying her retirement :]

This looks like modern au but it's vacationland actually, after she gets revived and wishes to live in Yoku's universe instead of going back home to die again. That is literally the only way you could convince her to retire :'3

[licncourt]

Girl, ignore those weirdo haters. I'm an "old" fan of and your vision of Lestat is one of the most fair and nuanced I've seen in this fandom, which is rare to find these days. The problem is that the AMC fandom are obsessed with their version of Lestat as sigma-alpha male "epitome of masculinity" and they hate anyone who doesn't marry that version (whether to love him or hate him, it's the same with AMC Louis) (not even Anne Rice at her worst made it so basic)

Trust yourself and don't change your mind for losers! Love u ❤

Thank you!! That makes me so, so happy!! I find Lestat a lot harder to write than Louis for me, but I do my absolute best to draw from the trilogy characterization since it's the most nuanced and consistent. I really like him and think he's a great character and with as much complexity as Louis if he's allowed to have it.

To be completely honest with you, I don't even know what the show-exclusive fans have going on over there because I give it a wide berth (truly none of my business for so many reasons). That sounds deeply terrible though, Anne was bad enough on her own. Jesus.

Regardless, I will always stand firmly against any strictly masc or fem reading of Louis or Lestat because they're way too interesting for that.