#i want to do the best with my time here. maybe impact a few lives.

[dimonds456]

Alright guys, sit down, I have to tell you all something very important. It's something you already know, but you NEED to hear this again.

You only get ONE life.

You only get one shot at this. You only get one lifetime to live it to your definition of the fullest, be that skydiving, entrepreneurship, or a quiet marriage. You only get one shot to tell people the things you need to tell them. You only get ONE shot to make yourself happy.

Yes, we have many, many, MANY years and many, MANY, MANY opportunities to start any of these! But... do you really want to do that on your deathbed? After you can look back and decide if you were happy with your life or not? When it's too late to change it?

I phrased this as doom and gloom on purpose, so allow me to elaborate and bring this back down a notch.

This post is about love. Straight-up. You only get ONE life, and I want you to take a moment right now and ask yourself if you're satisfied with how you view the world. Forget your living situation or your mental state for just a moment! How do you like your view of the world?

Is it a dark, disgusting thing, filled with smog, hatred, and fire? Is it a bright, beautiful thing filled with Good Vibes™ and sunshine? Or is it somewhere in the middle? Don't take these words literally. If you were to tell me if you think Earth is a good place to live, what would your honest answer be?

Now, let's go smaller. What is your honest opinion of your own world. Not fictional, real. Your circle of friends. the news you see. You personally. Now, how do you view the world? Did your answer change?

Now, let's ask this: what can you do to improve your opinion of the world?

Your personal sphere is the more important example, here, but this does apply to overall as well. If you're not happy in your own sphere, then you NEED to make a change. Stop reading bad news. Take a breath and leave arguments. Go watch that show you've been putting off. Your Steam library needs dusting.

You only get to live one life. So why are you letting yourself be miserable?

Dogs are real. Cats are real. Music is real. Soft, huggable plushies are real. The sun, fluffy clouds, your friends, potential friends you've never met yet, and you. You are real.

Take a breath. Breathe it in. You are real.

You have the capability to make your own choices.

You have the capability to choose when to hold on or let go of a thing or person.

You have the capability to say no to someone.

You have the capability to do the things you want to do, no matter how bleak your situation looks right now.

And doesn't that sound amazing?

Why do we hold on to hatred? Is hating someone really making you happy, or is it putting words in your mouth?

You don't have to like everyone. Far from it. If you don't like someone, we live in a day and age where avoiding them has never been easier. Block, report, drive away, walk. Anything works.

But you don't have to hate, either.

I'm almost done, I promise, but I want to tell you one more important thing. You probably already know this one, too, but you need to hear it anyway.

Hatred comes from love.

That seems really weird, right? Contradictory? Well, it is!

Hatred of a person could start because someone you love got hurt, or someone you love said bad things about someone else. Hatred could come from witnessing someone you love get hurt by an entire group, or one person. Or, it could come from watching a clip on the news. It could come from listening to your family talk about how much they hate a group, and then you'll hate that group, too, because you love your family.

That's all it is.

Any form of hatred can be broken down in this way. We hate because we feel that something or someone we love is violated, and we want to protect them. This can be from things like lions, tigers, plagues, and oceans, but it could also be from race, sexuality, bodily autonomy, countries, or your very own neighbors

But... is that hatred justifiable?

Can you really hate the entire ocean because your friend almost drowned there? Can you really hate a lion for needing to eat? Can you really hate someone who just wants to feel right in this world?

Cuz guess what?

You only have ONE SHOT at life.

But so do they.

Every creature needs to eat, no matter what your relationship with their prey is. The ocean isn't even alive, your fellow man was just unprepared to face it, and that's no one's fault. And that trans person wants to live their life to the fullest, too, whatever their definition of fullest is.

Now that I have the transphobes' attention, is hating this group making you happy?

I'd bet the majority of you say yes, right? But stop and think about this. Really, really think about this. What is something you've always wanted to do? Paint? Fly? Study? It can be anything.

Now, is hating a group of people in any way getting you closer to that dream?

...

No, right?

So why are you wasting the energy?

This goes about any group, too. Jewish people, people of color, gay people, muslims, disabled people, ect. Is hating this group of people who also only get ONE shot really making you happy? Helping you achieve your dreams?

No, right?

So why are you wasting the energy?

Now, if a group IS getting in the way (or trying to get in the way) of you trying to achieve those dreams? Great! I hate fascism, too! But now you know why.

You only get ONE shot at life. The choices you're making now are building up to a grander whole, a tapestry you will see as you lay on your death bed. Did you live a good life?

Yes, we struggle. There are times when it's fucking unfair. The world seems out to get us sometimes, but that's not your fault. Your responsibility then becomes what you choose to do with those struggles. Crumple under them, or push through? It's easy to fall apart, but so, so worth it in the end to get that 1st place ribbon you've always wanted.

So, how can you improve your worldview today?

[storywriter007]

HI OH MY GODS!! your writing drives me INSANE in the best way possible and i'm so obsessed with your fics. i was wondering if you could somehow make a fic based on the "no one touches her!" line in the book??

i'm just imagining maybe an argument between percy and reader before the big fight and then the line happens and then maybe end in fluff?? ofc you can take this however you want to!! THANK YOU A MILLION!!

No One Touches Her - Percy Jackson x Fem!Reader

author's note: OMMGGG TYSM!!!! im so glad you like my work!! thanks for the request! i'm sorry it took a while and i hope you like it :)

warnings: cursing, battle, mention of bloof

genre: fluff

word count: 1.1k

-> heroes of olympus masterlist

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send me requests here! (these are my guidelines)

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"you don't care about me!" y/n yelled from across the room. "you never have!"

"do you even hear yourself right now?" percy retaliated, just as loudly. "you know damn well i'd do anything for you!"

a battle was on its way as percy and y/n had their loud disagreement in an unknown sector of camp. she'd loved him for too long. she'd kept faith in him for too long. she'd been "friends" with him for too long.

"really percy! than answer my one fucking question, what are we?"

"you're my best friend!" he answered.

"that's what i mean! you know damn well we're not just 'best friends!'" she said angrily. "i can admit what i feel for you, why can't you do the same?"

"because i don't know!" he confessed. "i don't know."

of course he didn't know how he felt about her. of course he didn't consider the countless nights they'd stayed up and held each other while they wept about their lives. of course he didn't count how many times they'd almost kissed. of course he didn't count her.

"i'll put in words for you." she said softly, her eyes welling up with tears. "more than friends, less than lovers."

a war was about to begin. and now if she died, he would know how she'd truly felt all these years. percy looked at her with empathy and guilt in his eyes, but she turned away, preparing for the worst.

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good thing she had prepared for the worst, because how else would she have been able to fight off four monsters, by herself, with a sprained ankle, blurry vision, and intense fatigue.

she felt herself wobble as she swung her sword, but it made no impact. suddenly, she felt herself drop to her knees as spots of black began to fill her eyesight.

was this it? was this how it was going to end?

she looked around at the hideous faces that surrounded her. she'd die a martyr, a warrior, maybe even a hero. she wondered what her legacy would be; if anybody would remember her. she felt a monster slither closer to her.

"she can't fight anymore." it chuckled. "she's giving up."

"she's worn down." another monster added. "let's finish the job."

dying at the hands of a vicious beast wasn't exactly her top choice, but she couldn't do anything to prevent it. her limbs felt weak, her mind fogged up. she felt herself collapse on the ground. this was it. this was how it was going to end. she took one final look at the warzone around her.

"goodbye y/n." a monster chuckled.

suddenly, the monster began yelling in pain. her eyes fluttered open as she watched the monster float into the air, choking and gasping. then it happened to the next monster, and the next, and the next.

"no one touches her!" an angry, powerful voice yelled.

y/n fluttered her eyes open, squinting so she could see. there he was, in all his glory. percy jackson. she heard a pop sound, realizing that the monsters had exploded. he'd killed them. but he didn't slash and stab them, he bent their blood.

she faintly heard percy's voice as he knelt down next to her.

"y/n? y/n!" he screamed, stroking her hair. "fuck fuck fuck."

she felt herself get moved as her eyes shut.

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she woke up with the same blurry vision. she blinked a few times to clear it up before checking her surroundings. she was in the infirmary. she looked around, and saw someone across from her on her bed. he was looking down at the ground, anxiously bouncing his leg. his hand rested atop hers.

"percy?" she asked, looking at him.

he quickly turned to look at her and his eyes lit up.

"y/n!" he smiled. "you're awake, you're alive!" turning to face her.

will solace came in.

"she's awake!" percy said enthusiathically.

"i know." he smiled. "i heard you from across the hall."

"what happened?" y/n asked

"you were hit, and passed out from losing too much blood." will explained.

percy was still wearing the same tattered clothes from battle.

"i'll give you guys a few minutes, y/n, i'll be right back to check your vitals." will said, exiting the room.

"how long have you been here?" she asked, sitting up a little bit.

"i dunno, twenty-somethin' hours?" he guessed.

"non-stop?"

he shrugged in response.

"percy, i-"

"listen, i know we had a fight beforehand. and the truth is, i wasn't confused, i was scared. i didn't want to ruin everything we had for a relationship. and the thought of losing you freaked me out, so i-i was a dick and i lied."

"percy-"

"just hear me out, y/n. you almost died, and i, i don't know, i just don't think i could live if you weren't here." he admitted. "when you said 'more than friends, less than lovers,' you were wrong. we are more than friends. i love you, i always have, and i'm sorry that i made you doubt that-"

her heart fluttered as the three words left his mouth. she grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him in for a kiss. his arms gently wrapped around her as her hands cupped his face. he tasted like smoke and salt-water. his hair reeked of battle, and she could feel how rough his skin was. he pushed her back a little, deepening the kiss. it was passionate, it was sweet, it was long overdue.

"holy olympus, get off of her. it's been two minutes since the girl woke up." will said as he returned.

percy, very annoyedly, was forced to pull back as will checked y/n's vitals.

"all good, y/n." he smiled. "you're free to go whenever you're ready. stay light on the sugar. don't push yourself too hard just yet. get plenty of rest."

"thank you will." she smiled back.

"where's my thank you?" percy asked, offended. "i saved your life."

"you ruined my shot at a really cool death." she laughed.

"i'm sure the sugar will get to you before the monsters do." he chuckled, before leaning in to kiss her again.

it was a little more needy this time. it was clear percy had heard will's clearance, because he was a little more firm this time.

"sorry, forgot my stethoscop- for the love of gods jackson." will commented, grabbing his equipment and hitting the back of percy's head.

"ow!" he remarked, rubbing the back of his head.

y/n couldn't help but laugh. percy laid his head on y/n's chest.

"i love you." he said, quietly.

"i love you more." she smiled. "but you've gotta get up before will comes in and yells at you again."

[russellsppttemplates]

We're a couple of idiots, aren't we? (Charles Leclerc)

You had always been there to see Charles race and you wouldn't let your fight interfere with that

Note: english is not my first language. I'm not the best at writing angst pieces, but I hope this one is decent enough!

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: family issues (alludes to the caregiver necessities), couple fight

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

It all began when you came home later than expected, the tiredness evident in your eyes as you paced your bag down on the sofa and allowed yourself to rest for a little, "Hey, amour", Charles whispered, testing to see if you were awake as he walked inside the living room, "hey", you said, patting the seat next to you.

Kissing your forehead, Charles sat next to you, "how was your day?", he asked, rubbing your thigh, "exhausting", you sighed, "and the next few are going to be even worse. I probably won't be home for dinner tomorrow anyway".

Charles felt uneasy, squirming around in his seat. You had been working a lot, your family also needed you on their side since your grandparents needed more assistance these days, so you and Charles haven't been able to spend that much time together. And wether it was the fact that you're used to being around eachother or the fact that the season was not going as expected, Charles felt like he hadn't spent enough time with the person he considered his safe and happy place.

"You have been very busy, I feel like I've hardly spent time with you", Charles noted, and maybe it was a seemingly honest comment that wasn't intended to be taken as harmful as you did.

"I know I've not been home, Charles, you think I don't feel that too? I know we haven't spent much time together just the two of us, but it's not been easy! Everyone needs me here, there and everywhere at the same time, and I also need time for me!", you let out.

Unexpectedly, your words also impacted Charles in a way you didn't think they would, "I know you've been busy, but we also need to spend time together, no? Or is our relationship not something we should invest time on? In a relationship, we both need eachother", he gulped. A weird and new feeling sat in his chest, like he was pressuring you and that he was burdening you.

"We do, but we also need to let eachother have some time, too!", you said, feeling anger, sadness, and overall tiredness from your recent days, "I'm going to bed", you mumbled, getting up and heading for your shared bedroom.

The energy you had left in your body was only enough to allow you to wash your face, noticing the dull and dark tone as you quickly rubbed some moisturiser on, grabbing your pyjamas to out them on and lay in bed, taking a painkiller for the growing headache.

When Charles finally go to the bedroom, he noticed you were already asleep on your side of the bed, carefully walking along the side so he could kiss your forehead before he too got ready for bed.

.

By the time the next morning arrived, Charles had ready left, and when you grabbed your phone, notifications from various WhatsApp groups popped up.

Mum + Dad

Can you go by grandma's house today? She was complaining of some pain and we can't remember if her meds box is sorted out or not.

Ferrari GP Weekend

Okay, just to make sure I'm not leaving anyone out: Y/N, you're not coming this weekend, right?

Since your family had been needing you to spend more time with them and at home, you had already said that you weren't sure you'd be joining them for that Grand Prix, and last night's fight settled the subject.

Texting both of the groups, you got up and got ready for the day, already knowing it was going to be a tough one.

You and Charles didn't fight a lot, at least not like this. Usually, you always found a way to talk about things and sort them out. So even this was new territory, not having talked about the subject and finding a common ground, because the situation you both left it at the night before was not the one to have.

Throughout the day, you hopefully texted Charles saying that you'd try to be home so you could talk to eachother before he left later on the evening, and while you intended to keep it, you had to text him again

To Charles

I'm sorry, but I don't think I'll be home until nighttime. My grandma needs me and it's going to take a while.

Have a safe flight. Can you text me when you land, please? Love you ✨️

True to your word, you sat in your bedroom with the moon already shinning through the windows and showcasing perfectly Charles' bedside table with none of his rings, watch and bracelets where he usually put them when he was at the house.

.

"Why did I arrive to the paddock today only to find out that you are not joining me this weekend?", Francisca said over the phone, apparently not even bothering to wish you a good morning, even though it clearly wasn't one.

"Because I've been the busiest bee ever under the sun, and I also had a fight with Charles, and I need to sleep for three days straight to recover", you replied back, noticing the change in Pierre's girlfriend's tone.

"Oh", she added, "I'm sorry, it's just that you're always here and I haven't been able to talk to him properly yet, maybe it's a good thing I haven't yet", she admitted.

One thing you liked about her, was how honest she was with you, and you needed it right now, "do you think I should go? We left the subject hanging and it's not something light we can just solve over the phone. And besides, I've always been there for these races, and he deserves as much support as he can get", you asked, chewing on your bottom lip as you waited for her answer.

"I have no idea why you fought, nor do I want to know unless you feel comfortable in telling me, but I do know that you're made for eachother, so if your heart tells you to come to the race, you should", she advised and you could hear the smile on her voice, "besides, I love your company, so it's a win win".

.

From all the times you had previously travelled with Charles, you had become acquainted and a pro a listing what you needed for the race weekends, so packing was easy and quick: two changes of clothes for both colder and warmer weather, basic toiletries bag in a backpack with entertainment and snacks for the flight.

The early hours allowed you to get to the airport without any traffic and make it to the gate with enough time to spare so you could grab a coffee to go.

Francisca knew you were coming, and after having a conversation with your family, you explained to them how the whole situation was putting pressure not only on you but also on your relationship with Charles. As you expected, they were not aware of how the situation was on your side and sat down with you so you could find a better arrangement.

Arriving at the airport of destination, you quickly found the transport line that would be taking you to the closest stop near the paddock, gradually seeing fans get inside as the stops approached the track site.

You followed them in, wanting to go as unnoticed as possible as you walked along them.

"I just saw on Instagram that Charles had left his hotel a while ago, so he should be here any minute now", a young woman around your age commented with her friends, stopping by the benches you were sitting in. Turns out you were waiting for the same person after all.

"Is it okay if we sit here?", one of them asked kindly, "Oh, you're Y/N", one of the girls said.

Nodding, you pushed your backpack to rest near your legs, "of course you can sit", you smiled, still not used to the fact that fans often recognised your face.

"Thanks!", she scurried nervously, urging her friends to sit, seeing their surprised faces as they looked at you, "Also, I'm sorry, I'm sure this is weird for you, that I know your name and you don't know mine, I- we didn't expect to find you here", she apoligised, finally sitting down.

"It's okay, unless you're going to turn out to be come crazy stalker fan, I think we will be fine", you smiled, hoping they would catch the joke and relax a little.

"No no no!", they all said, smiling when you smiled back, "but, may I ask what you're doing here? I mean, don't you have an all access pass?", one of them wondered as she sat next to you.

"I'm surprising Charles, actually", you added, feeling like saying anything else would not only be violating yours and Charles' privacy, but also allowing the creation of rumours you wouldn't want, "I wasn't originally coming to see him race, but some things cleared up on my calendar so I thought I'd surprise him", you finished, seeing them smile, "do you come to watch races regularly?", you asked, changing the subject hopefully subtly enough that they wouldn't notice too much.

Conversation was flowing easily, really, they seemed like really nice girls and it never felt invasive, so the time you had to wait went by quickly, hearing people call your boyfriend's name.

You could notice his presence anywhere, that was a given. Wether it was his well trained torso that made spotting him even from his back, or his handsome face, it wasn't hard yo miss him even surrounded by fans who were wearing the same t-shirt as him.

"Let me stand around you so he won't notice me", you said, "with how enamoured he is of you, I'm sure it won't be long", one of the girls, named Lyla, you learned, spoke, wanting to see the scene unfold as he approached you.

"Hi!", Charles greeted, posing for the pictures while he signed the caps they had, not noticing your hand holding one of his own caps was in the mix.

"Charles! Can you sign this, please?", you asked, hoping you were loud enough, "I was not coming to see you race today, but I'm very happy I did", you almost yelled, thanking the fact that the other girls had helped you by keeping quiet until he realised you were there.

It was enough for Charles to recognise the voice. After all, he had been longing to hear it for the past couple of days.

"Y/N, you're here!", he called, handing Lyla the permanent marker before he hugged you, "I missed you so much, I'm sorry", he whispered on your ear before pulling back a little so he could look you in the eye, "you don't have a pass, do you?", he wondered, seeing you shake your head, "I'll see what I can do, but you're coming with me", he smiled, holding your hand in his and bidding goodbye to the group of girls after you all took a group picture.

The rush until you arrived in his driver's room didn't allow you to talk until you sat on the sofa after greeting everyone and thanking one of the team members for getting you a pass on such short notice.

"Do you think we can talk about it? I don't want to ruin the race by distracting you from it, but I don't think we should be here and not discuss it either", you brought the subject, looking up to see Charles push a chair and sit in front of you, "I want to apologise first", you said, "I never should have said what I said, especially the way I said it, I'm sorry", you apologised, "I never intended it in a way that would hurt you".

Charles grabbed your hands, lacing them in his and looking into your eyes, "I'm sorry, too. I think we should talk about it, too. I want this to be solved, I want us to be well", he admitted.

"My grandparents have been needing a bit more help, and my parents counted on me for it. And I feel like I haven't spent that much time with you, and I'm so sorry for it, but sometimes it just got too much. And I didn't want to burden you, you have your own things to worry about and this would be another thing. They're better now and this was probably a bad phase, but still", you explained.

Charles chuckled before he saw the confusion on your face, "no, I'm joking about this, amour. I'm glad they're better", he reasoned, "but I thought I was being a burden because I felt like I was clingy, like I needed you more than usual and that you had had enough. I didn't want to put more on your plate", he sighed.

Smiling at him, you moved your hand to caress his cheek, "you could never be too much, Charles. Sometimes I just need to deal with things on my own for a bit, even if there is help from someone else", you blushed.

"I know you need me to give you the space you need, that's why I didn't want to push you to talk about things, because as much as I want to craddle you in my arms forever and shield you away from the world's evil, I know you like to do things on your own, at least at first", he noted, earning your silent agreement, "but I'm here for you, always. I'm glad we worked that out", he smiled, pulling your face to his and kissing you deeply, only stopping when someone knocked on the door.

"I heard my favourite girl is back in the paddock, so I suggest you come out because I'm not feeling like I want to see whatever is going on there", your recognised Francisca's voice, getting up and opening the door to see Pierre by her side, "I told her she shouldn't interrupt you two, but she was very excited to know how the surprise went", he smiled.

"A very good surprise indeed, the best one ever", Charles said, pulling you in for one last kiss before he ventured out to the garage, a new feeling of confidence knowing you were there to watch him race.

[sunflower-lilac42]

𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗲𝗰𝗿𝗲𝘁'𝘀 𝗼𝘂𝘁 ; 𝘵𝘻11 ୨୧

➪ summary: pictures and text messages of her and her brother's best friend leak and she stays curled up in her room, not talking to anyone. so mason calls up her best friend and soon enough, trevor is on a plane to england

➪ warnings: things being leaked, crying, reader thinks her brothers hate her, crappy friends

➪ word count: 1.3k

➪ file type: fic - reupload

➪ sunny's notes: red, white, and royal blue is 100% the inspiration to this fic and yes i did basically copy the phone call and speech but its just too cute to ignore. i literally am in love with this movie. part two will be out tomorrow i hope! this would’ve been out earlier but i took a nap (shocking i know)

© sunflower-lilac42 ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

part two || tz11 masterlist || nhl masterlist || new taglist || navigation

Nothing was how it should be. They were supposed to be careful, they were careful. They were only seen together when it would make sense for them to be together; when he was in town for a game, when he was supposed to be hanging out with her brothers, or when he had a game against the Devils or the Canucks. And when they were seen together, they made sure everything was strictly platonic: no hand touches, stolen glances, nothing.

However, maybe they should’ve accounted for the fact that one, her friends were journalists, and two, her friends weren’t really her friends in the first place. They had a few classes together in college, back when she was still undecided, but despite that? They only found her interesting because of her last name and who shared it.

Somehow she was too predictable, her password was as basic as it got. It was the day Trevor asked her to be his girlfriend, they’re anniversary. It was the best day of both of their lives but now it was the root of all their problems. It wasn’t the biggest scandal on the dance floor, there were things much worse going on in the NHL and the world in general. No one would care about this besides the Zegras and the Hughes families and the girls who were too obsessed with hockey players and their relationships for their own good.

She was studying abroad in England this past year and she couldn’t help but fall in love with it. She had decided to extend her stay into the fall semester, not wanting to go back home. This sort of worked in her favor, she was 3,444 miles from Jack and Luke and 4,632 miles from Quinn. She was in a different time zone, country, and continent than them. All she had to do to avoid them was not answer her phone. 

She was good at that, blocking out social media and her phone as a whole. Growing up the sister of hockey players and her mom being who she was in the hockey world, she got used to the hate and backlash she got from not wanting to do hockey. Her phone was shut off and thrown into her desk drawer. Her friends tried to comfort her but were to no avail, she was too worried about what other people thought about it.

Not only had pictures of them been put out into the world but their text messages as well. However, she couldn’t remember a time she left her phone unattended. She hadn’t spoken to Trevor in two weeks, she hadn’t spoken to anybody besides her roommates in two weeks. She had seen a couple of articles and videos that were spreading, the one of Trevor’s interviews where he was addressing the situation was not only the biggest one but the most recent one. 

It was before the game, that the reporter had asked him about how everything in the media that was speculating had impacted him and his play. To which he responded with, “Y/n and I are together and have been since the beginning of the season. And whether people choose to support or hate it, isn’t my problem nor my business. We’re happy and hope everyone can support that decision and respect our privacy. I fell in love with a girl who happens to be related to my best friend. How is this affecting my mindset? I wouldn’t say it has, I’m still playling, and Greg still thinks I’m playing as best as I can and even better. I’m worried about her, that’s for sure. She hasn’t had the best track record with the media.”

He said a few more words, none of which mattered to y/n. She wasn’t sure if she cried more because of what he said or the situation. She curled up on the chair in the corner of the room, reading a book. Her friends looked at her sadly, they hated the fact that she had gone back to her reserved nature. 

Trevor on the other hand was acting like it wasn’t bothering him, he couldn’t hide himself from the media or anything really like she could. But, it was eating him alive. He didn’t know if she was okay or if something had happened or if she was ignoring him.  He was too desperate to know if he was okay so he attempted to reach out to all three of her brothers but he got nothing back in return.

It wasn’t until Mason walked into his room with his phone in hand, “I called her friend for you.”

Trevor looked at him with wide eyes, “What?”

“Thank me later.”

Her friend had been walking up the stairs to their apartment when she got the call from Mason, they had met when y/n and Trevor took them along on a trip to ensure that no rumors would start. She had practically run the rest of the way and bolted into the apartment. She walked over to y/n and handed her the phone.

She reached out for it and held it up to her ear, “Hello?”

“Baby!” 

Her voice stuck in her throat along with the sob that had been forming for a while. “Trevor? Oh my god, are you alright?”

“I’m hanging in there. Are you okay?”

She paused, “No. No, I’m not okay.”

“You know what, I’m coming to London tonight. Just hold on until I get there.”

“Hurry please.”

And just as he promised, 8 hours later he was standing in her apartment, opening his arms for her. She ran into them once she heard him call out and buried her head into his chest. Trevor sunk to the floor with her, his back pressed up against the wall, “It’s okay. I’m here. I got you.”

He could feel her body racked with sobs and he couldn’t help but start crying himself. He had torn himself apart these past two weeks as he waited to hear from her and knowing how much she had been in pain had hurt him. He picked her up soon after and carried her to the bedroom, laying her down on the bed. He crawled in next to her and wrapped his arms around her once more.

“Have you heard from your brothers yet?”

“Not a word. Not that I have checked my phone since the article came out.”

He frowned at her, tightening his hold, “Sometimes I wonder if part of their acceptance is just to forget it ever happened in the first place.”

This made him laugh a little as he pulled back to look at her. He moved the piece of hair that had fallen in her face behind her ear. His face changed when he realized that her small smile had turned back into a frown, “I feel so lost. They used to adore me, used to protect me, but now. It feels like they just wish I never existed.”

“Hey, they still love you.” She just blinked at him, “I’m sure if you looked at your phone they would just be wondering if you were okay.”

“I liked your speech, it was very put together.”

He smiled at her, “It made me very proud to be your girlfriend.”

“Hey, I’m always proud to be your boyfriend.”

She giggled and kissed his cheek, “You know what I mean you dork.”

“Speaking of boyfriends and girlfriends. Did you know Mason and Lia were dating?”

She perked up, “No! When did that happen?”

“Apparently-”

“Hey.”

The two turned and looked at Lia, “What’s up?”

“Your brothers are here.”

𝗠𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗲𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝗧𝗮𝗴𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 ୨୧

please message me if you didn't get tagged!

@toasttt11 @chiblackhawks @pucks-goals-penalties @dancerbailey3 @quinnylouhughesx43

© sunflower-lilac42 ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

[noellefan101]

Offline to Online HSR edition

Characters: Kafka, Silver Wolf, Seele, Bronya x gn! reader

Summary: your girlfriend is a streamer, a popular one at that. this is a fic about: how their chat finds out that you are dating, how they treat you off-stream and on-stream/do they treat you differently

"Warnings": Romantic relationship, modern au, streamer au, kissing, [h/c] is hair color, not proofread,

Note: this is the other one that was in the poll if you would like to read the genshin impact version it´s here. and omg i am so tired and my back hurts like CRAZY, but i luv you all.

Kafka

How chat found out: she kinda wanted to say it out loud the first day/month you started dating, but you stopped her because you didn´t want the whole world to know. and she agreed it was for the best anyways/don´t want all her simps to come at you(looking at you "cough cough")/. so she kept it a secret, still teases you about it though. and she was pretty good at hiding it, but then it had been a year or so and you moved in together, in a new house.

so obviously it was going to be harder to hide it, mainly because you lived together, but also because she was asked 24/7 to do a new house tour. she eventually did it, but without your office being in the video. it worked out well in the beginning but then people started wondering what was in the last room/your office/. you were worried about it, while she ignored it and acted like no one had asked about it. that of course didn´t help and only grew more suspicion to the last room. she eventually had enough and started asking you if she could say it, following up with her saying that her fans won´t come after you for it.

On-stream: she teases you, every time she has a chance too, and i mean EVERY time. she normally does that a lot, but not this much. she also doesn´t like when anyone else teases you. you´d say she´s possessive, but if you actually said that when she´s streaming, you would be banned from entering her office for a few months(at least).

Off-stream: she´s WAY sweeter when no one is watching, mostly because she doesn´t have that evil look in her eyes all the time. and then she´s with you so ofc she´ll behave(if you ask nicely). she would also kiss you more passionately than when she´s in front of chat/she doesn´t need chat to spread pics of you kissing all over twitter, that´s why/and she also hugs you more gently. over all she´s just softer with you but don´t tell her that.

she loves you, even more than chat loves her.

Silver Wolf

how chat found out: they didn´t really think that you were dating at first, but just some affectionate roommates. maybe it was because they didn´t think that she would be dating anybody/or maybe you looked too good to be dating silver wolf hehe/. but either way, you ARE dating, you just thought her chat knew already. but when you found out they didn´t/because they called you her roomie, not her partner/you tried to show more affection.

so when you were home while she was streaming you made some food for her. walked in and gave her the food, after you just left a little kiss on her cheek. leaving the chat stunned, she just started eating her food, acting like nothing happened. she asked if anything was wrong and they flipped out even more, like wtf they just kissed you. she didn´t think it was that big of a deal and tried to move on. but they wanted answers, she didn´t care ofc, and didn´t answer any of their questions. after she was done eating and she just continued the stream like normal. you on the other hand was a little worried that she got upset, because you just kissed her on the cheek, and in front of all her viewers. she eventually revealed to chat that you were dating, and they should shut up abt it. only because she didn´t want you to worry.

On-stream: she doesn´t really care if you´re there or not, but id happier with you there. she shows affection, but not much. the reason: she doesn´t want to ruin her reputation.

Off-stream: when she´s not streaming or in a call you play with her instead. she loves when you play with her, wanting to share her interest with you. she does this while hugging you/maybe from behind/and kisses you to distract you.

she loves games, but loves you even more.

Seele

How chat found out: they properly noticed the person walking around in the background all the time/since her streaming setup is in the living room/and they didn´t know who it was other than a person with [h/c] colored hair. they tried to ask about it, but Seele didn´t pay them any mind and moved on. she kinda thought they were joking and already knew who you were/but there kinda clueless and thinks she kidnapped someone/but ofc you´re just her partner and she didn´t force you to live with her. actually, it was your idea to live with her. so they should quit thinking that.

but anyway, she was streaming(like usual)and she was in a call with some friends/like Sampo, Bronya, Natasha, etc/and she kinda got into an argument with one of them/Sampo/. because he wasn´t playing well enough and it turned into a thing of them dissing each other. the others wanted to stop them, but they didn´t in fear of getting into it as well, so they kinda just listened in on it. she then revealed one of his secrets, witch lead to him saying that you and Seele were dating, and not just roomies. she then got confused, and asked f they didn´t know/bc she really fricking thought they did, oh well/the chat went wild. and when she found out they were clueless the whole time, she just laughed her ass off.

On-stream: she doesn´t have you around that much/other than in the background/but when you are there beside her, she has most of her attention fixated on you. she likes kissing, hugging and sitting with you, even if in front of everyone. and she doesn´t get embarrassed about it.

Off-stream: if possible she´s even more affectionate, the only reason is because she doesn´t want you to be embarrassed. but if you gave her permission, she would be all over you at all times, at parties, events, on stream, in front of friends and family... you get it.

she loves you a lot, even when you´re not around.

Bronya

How chat found out: she streams a lot, like a ton. so of course you´d either get home while she´s streaming or just be home in general. she´s very busy so you don´t say anything other than "i´m home", when you check on her after being out. or other times it´s you delivering food to her. in general chat mainly thinks that your just some friends living together, but thats only because they don´t know that you´re dating, and you don´t plan on revealing it right now. maybe because you either were busy, didn´t want to or you were scared of her viewers reaction/but she does comfort you, and tell you that they will accept it/.

the way they knew you were dating, was mainly because of you two being stupid. she was on a little break/since she had been streaming the last 5-6 hours, with only 3-4 breaks(send help)/and you walked into her room giving her a snack and kissed her on the cheek. that would have been okay normally, but this time she forgot to turn off the mic. leaving you to realize that after you looked at the chat, because it was going wild. you both then got embarrassed and she turned the stream off. she was supposed to stream for a few more hours but ditched the idea. and in the next week or so she now had to introduce you, when you were fully ready of course.

On-stream: she doesn´t show that much affection, since she gets easily embarrassed and looks almost identical to a tomato. but sometimes she will do cooking streams with you, and try to show off a little/that would be even cuter if you were a baker or cook, just saying(totally not trying to say anything)/but it doesn´t end that well.

Off-stream: she loves to hug, kiss and cuddle you. she feels so much more confident when you´re the only one watching, so she tries to show that she loves you as much as she can. she also feels safer when its only you and her.

she loves her job, but not as much as she loves you.

if you´d like more of these do request, luv ya-Masterlist

You are welcome to reblog and like any of my posts, but you CAN NOT translate, copy or hate on anybody for liking my posts

[odo-apologist]

Thinking about Out of Time, specifically the ending, which, in my opinion, is one of the best Rimmer scenes of the franchise. It's one of those moments- like his sacrifice for Nirvannah in Holoship or his insistence that Lister burn his soldiers in Marooned as a gesture of friendship- that hint at the potential that he has, deep down, of being noble, heroic, kind. What's particularly interesting about this scene, though, is that up to this point, Rimmer has often been shown as having a fascination with power, with militarism and fascist aesthetics. This is among his worst, most dangerous traits. You see the extreme outcome of it in Meltdown, what I think is Rimmer at his most abhorrent; he is the cause of the death of an entire group of people all because he wanted to live out his power fantasy of being a strategic military general, watching the battle at a distance like he describes in Marooned. Of course, as others have pointed out in their own posts, Rimmer's desire for/adoration of power likely comes more from his desire to be loved and prove he's deserving of love, but its consequences can be horrific. In Out of Time, when he encounters a version of himself that is an *actual* fascist sympathizer/apologist, he is disgusted. He is the one who wants to fight and who says, "Better dead than smeg." Whereas his future self says he would rather die than live like rats as the present crew do, our Rimmer would rather die fighting than live a life of ease and comfort while rubbing shoulders with bloodthirsty, power-crazed dictators.

And I think it's really interesting that the episode before this one is Rimmerworld. The aspect I often think about (that I wouldn't be surprised a lot of other fans also often think about) is Rimmer's 550+ years of imprisonment. It's such a disturbing concept, being kept in solitude for that inconceivably long, that its apparent dismissive treatment as a joke and lack of any real impact on Rimmer haunts me a little bit and I'm glad there are a few fics out there that explore the aftermath more thoroughly. But before he ends up in that situation, he 1. Abandons the others- the seemingly only people who have ever come close to caring about him- to die, leaving them to flee in an escape pod, and 2. Creates a civilization of clones of himself that he clearly bases off of the Roman Empire (a notable inspiration for many fascists). The first is significant because it shows the contrast between his cowardice in that situation and his lack of it in Out of Time. But the second point here, about the creation of his civilization, may show why that contrast happens between episodes, the reason for it. The civilization of Rimmerworld, based on an obsession with power, inspired by what we can assume is Rimmer's own idealized view of the Romans and empire in general, is the same that causes his centuries of suffering. So the next episode, when he sees another version of himself willing to get along with the kind of people like those who imprisoned him (who, albeit, were also versions of him)...I don't know, maybe the events of Rimmerworld did have some notable effect on him after all, at least for a while; maybe that's why he was so sure in his decision that the crew fight even though he knows they'll die trying.

Or maybe I'm just being ridiculous and overthinking things

[daisykihannie]

I would really really love to see you pick a member and a number. Just one you’d really want to do together🥺

omg! you’re my favorite person ever! I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE!!

85.) Body Swapped Besties

Pairing: Jeongin x Reader

Warnings: Crack

A/N: im kind of sad that i can’t make a full fic out of this but i ended up accidentally making it 2k words anyways and now im exhausted.

Your alarm was blaring loudly, signaling that it was 8 am and time for you to get up. You let out a groan and rolled from your back onto your left side, grabbing your phone and swiping the off button. Once the incessant screaming of your phone quit and your room fell back into a comfortable silence, you rolled back onto your back. You let out a yawn and stretching your limbs as far as humanly possible, ridding the sore muscles of their sleepy coated stiffness.

After a few moments of laying there, trying to keep yourself from falling back to sleep, you opened your eyes for the first time. The morning sun was shining through your sheer curtains, adding a soft green hue to your bedroom. The familiar sight of your white ceiling welcomed you back to the land of the living. Your body was aching and sore, more than usual. It felt like you’d spent the last week training for a triathalon when the most physical activity you did was walking to run errands and go to work. Maybe you slept wrong? Somehow you were able to sleep incorrectly on every bone, joint, muscle, and tendon?

Finally forcing your aching body to sit up, swinging your legs over the side of the bed before standing and letting out a his of pain as your muscles screamed at you to give them a break. You stumbled to the bathroom, struggling to move your body yet feeling quite a few inches taller than normal despite being slightly hunched over from pain. Flicking the light switch on in the bathroom, you walked straight to the toilet with a painfully full bladder. You sat down like normal but it felt different somehow. What was between your legs, keeping them from closing completely? You looked down and let out the loudest sheik your sore throat could muster. It was a lot deeper than your normal morning voice too, like 5 octaves lower.

You had a penis. You’re a woman in your twenties who suddenly grew a penis overnight. What was going on? You were panicking now, but you couldn’t stop the stream that was coming from your body that actually wasn’t YOUR body. Once you finished your morning pee, you pulled up your pants and ran to look in the mirror. Why the fuck was your best friend staring back at you? You- no, Jeongin’s body was what you saw and not your own. This has to be a dream right? You slapped yourself in the face, hard, a red handprint forming on the honey colored skin and stinging from impact. Okay, not a dream.

You ran out of the bathroom, grabbing your phone with trembling hands and immediately dialed your best friend’s number. You went to voicemail the first time, the second, the third, and finally on the fourth call he answered.

“Y/nnie?” He grumbled out, obviously still half asleep but instead of hearing your best friend, you heard yourself. “Jeongin!” you shouted, successfully waking up the younger man. “What is- why do I sound like you? WHY DO I HAVE TITS!? OH MY GOD! AND I'M SHORT! WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!?” Now Jeongin was panicking too. You could hear his door click open softly in the background and another man’s voice hit your ears. “Jeong- wait. Y/N? What are you doing here and- where’s jeongin? Why were you screaming?”

“Channie Hyung!” you could hear the others voice crack, probably crying considering that’s exactly what your body would do in this situation. “Why are you calling me Hyung Y/N? That’s weird.” Chan’s voice was still thick with sleep as he spoke and you listened to the interaction through the phone. “No, it’s not Y/N. It’s- why am I crying? Y/N, why the hell are you such a cry baby?” Jeongin asked you, probably confusing Chan in the process.

“It’s not like I can help it! It’s the estrogen and other hormones coursing through my body! Why the hell are you so hot headed!? I almost punched my mirror when I looked in it!” you retorted, anger filling your tone. “Do you really wanna punch me that bad y/nnie?” He asked and you were about to respond when he spoke again. “Wait- mirror? Y/nnie you dirty dog. Checking out my incredible body was the first thing you thought to do?” you could practically hear the smirk in his- well your- voice.

“No, the first thing I did was go to take a piss when I noticed a cock between my legs. Then I freaked out.” the words left your mouth before you could think and you heard a fit of giggles break out on the other side. You scrambled to fix your words, “I DIDN'T LOOK BECAUSE I WANTED TO! I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS THERE!” you screamed and Jeongin only laughed harder. You were pissed again, the testosterone severely influencing your emotions.

“Okay- what the actual fuck is going on here!?” Chan shouted and shortly after you heard the other guys’ voices mixing into the mess on the other line. “Fuck it. I'm coming over.” you groaned and hung up the phone. You opened your wardrobe and began to pick out your normal clothes and started getting dressed before realizing they didn’t fit Jeongin’s body. “FUCKING TALL MUSCULAR BASTARD!” you shouted and shucked off the clothes. Luckily you had a few articles of his clothes he’d abandoned at your place over the years. Slipping on a hoodie and a pair of sweats, resorting to wear the house slippers you kept for him at your place considering his feet were a few sizes larger than your shoes.

It took you 15 minutes to drive to the dorms. You had to push the seat in your car all the way back for his lanky legs to actually fit and it was incredible how much of the road you could see in his body, his height creating a better vantage point. You trudged up to the door annoyed, not bothering to knock and swinging the door open. Stupid men and their lack of self preservation skills, just keeping their front door unlocked. “YAND JEONGIN!” you shouted and suddenly a stampede of 7 men and well, you, came running towards you from one of the back rooms.

“Okay that’s fucking weird. It’s like you’re talking in third person.” Changbin mumbled and then Jeongin was in front of you, just in your body. You had to look down slightly instead of up this time which was really strange. “Is that what I look like to you?” you gasped. You two didn’t have a huge height difference but apparently just 5 inches was a drastic change that neither of you were used to. “Damn. I’m even hot from this angle.” he quipped in response and you had to resist every urge to slap him considering you’d be slapping yourself instead.

“Okay, we have got to fix this now. Before your stupid boy brain does anything foul to my body.” you snarled, the thought making you angry again. “Don’t worry, having to see my best friend’s tits isn’t that bad but god are they annoying. I’ve ran them into shit probably 6 times already.” he grumbled and moved his hand to rub the sore area of your breast. You were able to grab his wrist, the strength of your grip causing a yelp to ring through the dorm. “OW FUCK! Letgoletgoletgo!” he whines and you released the wrist, it immediately began to swell and turn red. “Fuck that hurt!” he shouted and Minho began to inspect it.

“Damn Jeong- er y/nnie… I think you broke y/n- er um… the wrist? this is so confusing.” he groaned and let go of the possibly broken wrist. “Jesus fuck. What are you, the hulk? how the hell do you not break everything and everyone you touch?” you were shocked by the amount of strength you had, you didn’t even try and you had probably just broken your wrist? How the hell does he hold back his strength all the time? Is that why your muscles hurt so bad?

“Yeah, we’ve gotta get you two switched back before either of you get handsy with each- no, with yourselves? And before Y/nnie ends up breaking anything or anyone else with Jeongin’s body.” Chan stated matter of factly and the others let out exhausted sighs. It wasn’t even 9am yet and today was already the most exhausting day ever.

[cupcakeshakesnake]

are you serious about believing that cats shouldn't be let outside?

why? like don't get me with that "oh they'll kill animals" well yeah, maybe they will. it's their natural instincts, and allowing them outside promotes a range of natural behaviours. so isn't it cruel to prevent that? and if you believe they shouldn't be allowed to go outside, isn't it cruel to choose to keep them inside instead of just *not having a cat?*

also for that arguement the rspb says " there is no scientific proof that predation by cats in gardens is having any impact on bird populations UK wide." while you may not be from the UK, the UK isn't a place where domestic cats are native either!

I wonder if you are American as so many Americans seem to have this weird opinion - is it very common to believe solely in indoor cats where you live? /gen q. it's very common to have cats that go outdoors here in the UK, and the concept of outdoor cats doesn't exist - if someone mentioned an outdoor cat I'd think of a cat that never went inside, like idk a barn cat. a website I found said 90% of cats in the uk can go outdoors but based on what I'm seeing on your feed and Tumblr it's very different for you?

Yes, I'm serious.

I suppose it's also a natural instinct of coyotes (US), foxes (UK) and hawks to kill cats, so isn't it cruel to prevent that? Cats may have natural instincts but they are not part of nature. They're not part of your local ecosystem, you brought it there. Do you only care about your cat fulfilling its 'natural instincts' and nothing else?

Let's say you have, oh I dunno, the Xenomorph from Alien. Let's say you love it a lot. Are you gonna set it free on the neighborhood because its natural instinct is to kill?

If you believe children shouldn't stick their fingers in the wall socket even if they want to, shouldn't you just not have children?

And yes there is plenty of scientific proof. Cats are not native ANYWHERE. If your cat just stays in a fenced garden or maybe a catio, it's fine, but studies found that cats' kill counts are so high because even 'freeroaming' cats roam less than their wild counterparts (i.e. jungle cats) and thus kill in a more concentrated area. They also kill for fun and not just to eat. Cats have contributed to the extinction of 63 species of birds, mammals, and reptiles in the wild, I'm directly quoting an article here.

Very weird of you to push the American button just because I disagree with you, I am in fact South Korean, and oh believe me outdoor cats are barely a thing here. Cats here are either firmly indoors or stray, save for very rare cases. Most cat owners (and people in general) live in the city and if they let their cats out, a variety of things could happen - such as their cats eating trash and getting sick, being hit by a car, or being killed (or worse, captured and tortured) by ill-meaning people (which has very well happened before).

+ Edit) Let's talk cruelty. What is more cruel, a cat being bored out of its skin, or the cat being flattened by a car, or countless small animals being torn apart and left to die? All of which is preventable with a few extra steps from the cat owner.

In my opinion, having cats (or any other pet) is a lot like raising children. Of course their needs should be paid attention to, but they themselves don't always know the best way to go about fulfilling those needs and it's your responsibility to keep them safe and happy at the same time. You can't let them do whatever they like all the time. AND, you are responsible for what your pets/children do.

[antianakin]

You’ve talked a little about ships before but mainly in the context of how that is connected with the/a specific Jedi. And also a bit about ships you don’t like

But in Star Wars as a whole what’s your favourite ship, which one do you think is the best, and which one do you think is the most compelling?

(I know that the answer to all three could be the same but for me personally there’s often little overlap in these things so ymmv)

Also which ship do you think has the most potential?

I'll assume that canon and fanon are both options here.

"My Favorite" is the easiest to answer, so I'll start there. I've made an entire fic rec list for it and made no secret of the fact that I really like Codywan. Star Wars wasn't a fandom I really did any shipping in when I first was introduced to it as a kid. It wasn't until I decided to get back into Star Wars a little as an adult that I was even introduced to the IDEA of Codywan as a ship, but once I discovered it, it had me absolutely hooked. I will admit that I have a hard time with reading Codywan fics these days and interacting with other Codywan shippers because I often end up feeling like my interpretation of the characters is very different than the norm and what I want from the relationship - the thing that makes it compelling to me - isn't the same as most other people who enjoy the ship. But it was my first Star Wars ship and I still really enjoy the version of Codywan that exists in my head, so it will continue to claim the title of favorite.

For "Most Compelling" and "The Best" I'm actually going to exclusively define those as being IN CANON because anything in fanon can be compelling depending on how well someone writes it. I could obviously put Codywan down for both of these categories, but it would specifically be MY version of Codywan, the version that only really exists in my own head, and not necessarily the more popular version of them in the fandom.

I'm going to give "The Best" and "Most Compelling" to Jyn and Cassian from Rogue One. I will readily admit that, as someone who identifies as aroace, the fact that Jyn and Cassian never do or say anything explicitly romantic to each other is a major part of the reason I like them. I also personally believe it's the reason they're so compelling. Without being able to use any of the usual narrative shortcuts that romance tends to provide, Jyn and Cassian's dynamic relies on actually showing the two of them connecting with each other on a deeper level. I love how so much of their relationship with each other exists only in their eyes, in the way that they look at each other (whether the other person is looking back or not). I love the way their relationship comes through in-between the lines rather than stated out loud. I love the subtlety that exists for Jyn and Cassian in a way it doesn't for pretty much any other more "canon" ship.

I have also said before (though I'm not entirely certain I did it on this blog or not) that I really like angst, usually in the form of hurt/comfort but a good tragedy sometimes just hits the spot. Jyn and Cassian living in a "maybe," existing in a perpetual "what could have been," is so fucking sweet to me. That shit hurts JUST RIGHT. I love the idea that these two people meant everything to each other but only in the last few days before they died and they never even got to explore what exactly that could be. Their love is shown in how they impacted each other, the ways their relationship changed each other, because that's all they ever had time for. I fucking love that shit. The ambiguity of Jyn and Cassian's relationship is what makes it the most compelling to me and I think that the fact that they never get together forced the writers to show us they loved each other in far more interesting and nuanced ways than usually exist for couples that more explicitly get together on screen.

And finally, my choice for "Most Potential" is FinnRey. I really liked Finn and Rey's dynamic in TFA, I liked the way they both learned to rely on each other when they'd never had anyone to rely on before, the way they were able to escape their respective prisons and take their first steps into a larger world together. I liked the theme of coming back for each other no matter what, of reaching out for each other so they couldn't be separated, and the idea of shared fate where they would become the hero of the story TOGETHER. Obviously we all know how that dynamic got sidelined and ignored after TFA, but both characters are still alive and definitely have more story to tell, so the potential remains. Whether that potential ever actually goes anywhere, even if it's just in things like novels and comics, is still super up in the air. But I think these two could have an incredible dynamic if anyone was willing to give them the time of day.

[jimhines]

2022 Writing Income

It’s that time again – for fifteen years now I’ve been writing an annual blog post about my income as a writer. Money tends to be an uncomfortable, even taboo topic, but I think it’s important to help counter the myths that we’re all multimillionaires living in Glass Onion-style mansions. (Side note: If anyone wants to pay millions of dollars for my book, I’ll happily update this blog post from my private island mansion.)

Remember, every writer’s career is different, and I’m only one data point.

Prior Years: Here are the annual write-ups going back to 2007: 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021.

In 2016, instead of a personal income write-up, I did a survey of almost 400 novelists about their income.

My Background: I’m a primarily “traditionally published,” U.S.-based SF/F author with 15 books in print from major New York publishers. The first of those books came out from DAW in 2006. I have an agent, and have been with them since about 2004.

I’ve self-published a middle grade fantasy and a few short collections. I’ve also sold about 50 short stories to different magazines and anthologies.

I’ve never hit the NYT or USA Today bestseller lists.

I’m currently the sole parent of a teenager (at home) and a 22-year-old (at college). I have a day job that’s just over half-time, both for the paycheck and the benefits.

2022 in Summary: There’s no gentle way to say this. The last several years have kind of sucked. Losing my wife to cancer in 2019 completely derailed my writing. I was hoping 2022 would be a comeback year, but life had other plans…

I did write and sell two new short stories and one nonfiction piece, which was nice. I’ve got a finished middle grade book that’s been on submission for a while. I finished a standalone fantasy that’s been sitting with my publisher for a while.

Normally, my editor is pretty quick about responding, but last year wasn’t normal for DAW, either. DAW was acquired by Astra House. A lot of their time and energy went into that deal. I’m hoping for the best, but things still haven’t settled into the new “normal.”

Last year did see the release — finally — of Terminal Peace, the third book in the Janitors of the Post-Apocalypse series. I’m thrilled and relieved to see that book in print, but it came out right in the middle of the Astra House acquisition, which may have impacted things like promotion and publicity.

I also finished the first draft and started revising a new standalone middle grade fantasy with series potential.

2022 Income: The biggest check was the publication payment for Terminal Peace. All total, before taxes and various expenses, the writing brought in $13,957.16. While that’s absolutely nothing to sneer at, and I’m grateful for the success, it’s also a dropoff from the past couple of years. To be blunt, if you look at the cumulative graph, things have been slumping a bit.

Income Breakdown:

Patreon has been a small but steady and helpful source of income. My thanks to everyone for that!

As usual, my U.S. novels are the biggest piece of the pie. The short fiction category is a bit higher this year, thanks to those two new stories. I didn’t self-publish anything new in 2022, but if that middle grade book doesn’t sell, I’d like to publish that one later this year.

Novels (U.S. editions): $8,542.83

Novels (Non-U.S. editions): $473.25

Self-Published: $1158.24

Short fiction: $892.86

Audio: $521.04

Patreon: $1668.94

Other: $700

I mentioned earlier that things have been in a bit of a slump, and I need to focus on breaking out of that. Some things I can’t currently control. Tomorrow I could wake up to an offer from DAW on the book they’ve got, and maybe an email from my agent that the middle grade title he’s been shopping around went to auction and got a six-figure advance. But I can’t make these things happen.

Priority #1 is to keep writing. If I’m not doing that, other goals are pretty much moot.

Priority #2 is to figure out some alternate options. It may be time to put more time and effort into self-publishing as a complement to my traditionally published work.

The biggest thing making me anxious is that I’m pretty much out of contract. The paperback of Terminal Peace comes out this year, but for the first time in about 15 years, I don’t have the security, the luxury, or the deadlines of a signed contract. In some ways, this is freeing: I can write whatever I want. But there’s no guarantee as to when things will see print. Submitting to the traditional publishers is a long, slow process…

From talking to other writers who’ve been doing this a while, I’ve learned that pretty much every career has its ups and downs. Personal, pandemic, and publisher issues have been a bit of a perfect storm for me these past few years, but I’m not going anywhere. After 27 years as a writer, I’m excited to see what comes next.

Wrap Up:

I hope this has been helpful. As always, feel free to share the post and/or ask questions.

[cirilla-fiona-riannon]

Give Me Everything You Have

Translations may not always capture the exact nuances or tone of the original text. Please support Cybird by buying their stories. Expect grammatical errors.

My beloved fiancé’s birthday was almost here.

Emma: “.........”

Silvio: “What happened to you earlier?”

Emma: “What are you talking about?”

Silvio: “You have this intense gaze, like you’re about to pounce on me.”

Emma: “Don’t worry about it.”

Silvio: “Don’t be ridiculous.”

(Probably just a few more minutes left.)

As his birthday drew closer, the tension built up because as the clock struck midnight, a competition was about to begin.

(I won’t lose, no matter what.)

------------Flashback------------

Rio: “You better be careful on his birthday.”

A few days ago, Rio told me this while I was gathering information for Silvio’s upcoming birthday.

Rio: “He’s the wealthiest businessman on the continent, so his birthday is no joke.”

Rio: “On that day, merchants and prominent figures from various countries gather to celebrate him.”

Emma: “Is it that grand?”

Rio: “Oh, it’s beyond grand. His birthday has such a huge economic impact that it’s no laughing matter.”

Rio: “All the accommodations near the castle are fully booked, and the guest rooms in the castle are occupied by VIPs.”

Rio: “The gifts alone surpass the average person’s lifetime income.”

Rio: “Everyone wants to celebrate him, so the entire city turns into a festive frenzy.”

Emma: “That’s incredible, as expected of him.”

Emma: “But that means it's going to be difficult to celebrate with him on his birthday.”

Emma: “Maybe it’d be better if I celebrated it with him the day before his birthday.”

Rio: “No way. Why should you, his fiancée, have to compromise?”

Rio: “If that flashy guy puts other people before you, I’m going to riot.”

Emma: “Hehe, knowing you, you might actually do it.”

Emma: “But wouldn’t it annoy him if I asked for his time on his birthday?”

Rio: “Not at all! I assure you.”

Rio: “He’s freaking crazy about you, so there’s no way he wouldn’t be happy.”

Rio: “You shouldn’t yield to that flashy guy or other people.”

Rio: “You can say this to him if you want: As my fiancée, you need to obey me and give me your time!”

Emma: “Okay. Thank you, Rio. I’ll do my best!”

---------Flashback Ends---------

(Even if he’s busy on his birthday, it should be fine the moment the date changes.)

By the way, Silvio didn’t know I knew about his birthday.

I wanted it to be a surprise, so I prepared the cake and presents meticulously and made sure he wouldn’t notice.

As I gathered my determination, he playfully stroked my head, unaware of everything.

Silvio: “By the way, it’s not good for you to stay up so late. It’ll affect your health.”

Emma: “I’m an adult. I’ll be fine.”

Silvio: “That’s not an excuse. Should I put you to bed like an adult, then?”

Emma: “No, thank you!”

(Just a little more.)

Amidst the sound of waves outside the window, the ringing of a bell echoed, indicating that the time had changed, and it was now his birthday.

(Alright!)

Emma: "Prince Silvio, happy birthda一"

Before I could finish my sentence, a knocking sound reverberated through the room, interrupting me.

(Who could it be this late at night?)

Without much surprise, he stood up and lazily opened the door.

Gathered people: "Happy birthday, Prince Silvio!"

(!?)

I rushed to his side and peeked into the hallway, only to see a long line of people.

The line stretched so far that the end was no longer visible.

Emma: "This is..."

Silvio: "It's always like this on my birthday."

Silvio: "Everyone tries to get my attention, resulting in fierce competition."

(.........)

(I was naive!)

The line that formed at midnight to congratulate Silvio on his birthday never stopped.

Since many of them were noble guests and influential merchants from other countries, he couldn’t simply ignore them.

It didn’t take long for the lively, bustling night to turn into the morning.

(Nn...)

Lured by the soothing sound of waves, I opened my eyes and abruptly sat up on the sheets, soaked in a gorgeous scent.

(Crap, I fell asleep.)

I recalled him telling me to go to sleep and pushing me to bed in between chats last night.

(Where's Silvio...?)

I could hear his voice outside in the hallway.

It seemed like the line was still ongoing.

(No way, right? So that means he didn't sleep at all?)

I hurriedly got up and changed into the dress I had left in his room.

I tidied myself up a bit and gently opened the door.

Silvio: "You woke up at just the right time."

He had already changed without me noticing and turned towards me.

(Oh wow, there are still so many people in line.)

Silvio: "Let's go have breakfast."

Emma: "Are you okay?"

Silvio: "*Sigh* You're worrying about me way too soon."

Emma: "But you didn't get any sleep, did you?"

Silvio: "It's always like this on my birthday."

(It's always like this!?)

(He seems fine at first glance, but can't he at least rest during breakfast?)

(That's what I thought, but again, I was naive.)

While we usually have breakfast in his room or the dining room, today, however, it was in the courtyard.

The guests didn't forget to approach Silvio and speak to him as they enjoyed the seafood dishes.

(He doesn't even have time to rest.)

(It seems like he hasn't had much to eat either.)

While keeping a respectful distance, I stood nearby and waited for a brief pause in their chat before quickly speaking up.

Emma: "Would you like me to get you something?"

Silvio: "I don't need it. Just make sure you eat your fill."

Emma: "Don't you have an appetite?"

Silvio: "It's not like that. I just want to hold back a bit to prepare for today's main event."

(Main event?)

Before delving further into the conversation, a guest took Silvio away.

(What should I do? Is it going to be like this all day?)

(But if this continues, he won't get any rest.)

(I want to celebrate with him, but I also need to look after his health!)

After the buffet party, we next went to the city.

As soon as we passed through the city gate, people who had been waiting surged forward all at once.

The escort knights managed to hold them back to some extent, but it looked like the line at the court was just the beginning.

(I'm going to get squished and separated!)

I desperately clung to him, and he overreacted.

Silvio: "You...!"

Emma: "If I don't do this, we'll get separated!"

Silvio: "Don't do such things in public."

Emma: "I was just holding onto your arm!"

Silvio: "That's exactly the problem. *mumbles*"

(Did he say something just now?)

Emma: "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you!"

Silvio: "Ah, is that so? Then I won't say it again!"

(What!?)

He turned away and started chatting with everyone again.

(I feel like I missed out on something important.)

Despite feeling disappointed, I desperately clung to his cape, not wanting to be separated from him.

After what seemed like an eternity, I finally got my chance.

Perhaps tired from it all, he conspired with a knight and took a break in a secluded alley we escaped into.

Silvio: "Those guys should tone it down a bit."

(We finally have a moment alone.)

(At first, I thought I just wanted to have time to celebrate, but seeing how difficult it is, I can't afford to be selfish.)

(If only I could say happy birthday already.)

Emma: “Prince Silvio...”

Before I could even say it, he forcefully grabbed my chin and silenced me with a kiss.

(!?)

Emma: “What are you...”

A voiceless scream escaped me as his lips curled into a mischievous smile.

Silvio: “You just made a face like you’ve had enough.”

Emma: “Huh?”

Silvio: “You should come at me more seriously.”

Emma: “What do you mean...?”

Silvio: “*Sigh* You wanted to greet me, right?”

(He noticed.)

Silvio: “Then don’t give up until you give me everything you got.”

(He seems to see through my attempts to greet him.)

He messed up my hair and stepped out into the bustling city.

It didn’t take long before the people surrounded him again and disappeared.

I was stunned by the sudden kiss, but I quickly regained my composure.

(He’s gone. He must have known I wanted to celebrate.)

(Wait, could it be...?)

(Is he running away from me!?)

Part 2 ╎ His POV

[doukeshi-kun]

𝙜𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠 𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙛✗𝙘𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙚, 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙙𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙡 𝙬𝙚 𝙙𝙞𝙚

featuring ⨳ stalker!nikolai gogol x fem!reader

synopsis ⨳ “I flirt with my woman by chasing her with a knife, dearest. And she likes it. She loves it. She loves it so much that she can't stop thinking about it. She thinks of her chaser so much that her pretty brain can't hold all the thoughts she had about him that she has to put it all down into her little journal.” Nikolai presses his knife a bit harder, “She likes it.”

contents ⨳ stalker au, 18+ content, dark content, harsh languages, very dubious consent, predator/prey dynamics, threats, manipulation, rough semi-public unprotected s*x, horror descriptions, repetitions are intentional, masochism, violence, impact play, oral (both receiving), knife play, hints of ‘exhibitionist’, light mindbreak, very toxic relationship, obsessive and possessive behaviour, dead dove do not eat

notes ⨳ stupid ass labels ruin my hardwork. thanks a lot. now i have a reason to post this draft. fyi this is a part 2 of my stalker nikolai au

❝ Day 6 of him not being outside my house.

One more night and it will be officially a week since he last came here. Truthfully, dear diary, I know I should feel relieved and happy that one threat to my life is gone, even if it's temporary.

But I think he fucked me so hard that he fucked my head too.

I can't stop thinking about him. Not in a bad way. I just can't get him out of my head. Every fucking time, I find myself looking at my phone at work because I hope he texted me creepy messages. I purposely wear short clothes when I'm out in the living room because I want to tease him. I don't even lock my doors, hell, I even leave my wardrobe slightly open.

Why why why why am I acting like this? I'm losing my logical sense! I should not do those stuff! I should not rile a fucking murderer! No normal human would think of walking around their house topless, nipples out, perked and shit, just for their fucking stalker to see!

I blame my fucking hormones.

Maybe he's right. Maybe I'm a whore this whole time.

I am ashamed of myself.

I am also ashamed that I actually wait for him to barge in my house again. I want to experience that first night when he first talked to me as Kolya. I want him to wat no no what the fuck am I writing

Anyway, dear diary, I'm quite excited about this weekend. I will go out to have a drink— actually we'll get fucking drunk so fuck yea

I wouldn't call myself a lonely person, but I do... have very few friends. Maybe it's because of my weird hobby. Maybe it's just my social skills. But, putting that aside, I am quite happy that I am actually invited to go.

Because nobody invites me that often. pathetic bitch

And very rarely do people take my invitation to go on some horror adventures with me. I could count on one hand how many people have come with me to enjoy those scary things.

Maybe I should put myself out there. I can't stay this aloof and alone without a companion, or a genuine genuine friendship. Romance is one thing, but to be honest, having a deep friendship is beautiful too.

I hope I can have a best friend. Maybe one day. If I don't fuck myself up in my life so badly, that is. ❞

— ˚ ១。read more? ☄.

— ˚ ១。read more? ☄. [AO3]

[writingwisterias]

How would Chris Redfield and RE6! Leon react to Reader sacrificing their humanity to fight back against an enemy that screwed them over in the first place (like Wesker or Simmons)?

Reader injects themselves with the last remaining Veronica Virus sample, resulting in a fiery transformation before their very eyes. (https://youtu.be/r6uW32L1H7I?si=JP-HYfnE9VIFRgnA)

Sometimes, you have to fight fire with fire.

Thank you for the request! I haven't gotten to the games that have the veronica virus so I've done the C-virus from RE6 because I've played them! I've kept the same idea of fight fire with fire though. Hope you enjoy, My requests are still open so feel free to drop any you have! ~ Mads <3 (Not proof read)

Warnings: Angst, Needles (reader inject virus into them), Death, Reader Death, Hurt no comfort, Fighting, Set after the events of RE6

A pained groan left your lips as you were smacked against the wall by yet another J'avo. The impact just adding to your never ending bruises you had collected on what was meant to be a simple mission. You and Leon had received intel that there was activity of the C- virus still happening in rural areas of China so you were told to investigate and stop whatever was happening. Turns out the BSSA also sent a team to do the same thing, and that led you to meeting Chris. You quickly shot the J'avo that was attacking you, allowing you to finally catch your breath for a moment. The room was swarmed with what seemed like an endless supply of enemies, Leon was in the corner fighting with as many as he could his back against the wall. Chris wasn't in any better of a situation who was now fighting hand to hand as he didn't have enough time to stop and reload. You felt the vial in your pocket, a sample that you and leon were meant to take back to the government so they could investigate a cure further. You knew what happened to Piers after he did the same to save Chris. The memory haunted the man still with the way he looked at the vial when you had found it but you also knew that the virus game them the fighting chance against the enemies and maybe with this virus its the only way to actually defeat it.

You clutched your side as you slowly raised to your feet. Leon and Chris were now back to back fighting with each other, the majority of the enemies surrounding them. You didn't want to do this to them, didn't want to make Chris relive the same trauma again. Or give Leon any further trauma after you've had to drag him out of many bars since your last visit to China. Yet you couldn't let them die, if it meant that they could get out of here and live you would do it for them. You couldn't give a shit about the world anymore, it was cruel enough to send you all back here but your friends. You shakingly held the vial against your arm and sucked a breath as you felt the virus enter your system. Your arm throbbed with a dull ache as you felt the virus spread throughout your body. Chris and Leon's heads snapped in your direction when you let out a large groan and collapsed to the floor. Your fingers gripped at the floor desperately as you writhed in pain. You could feel your body grow hot as the mutation began, your skin glowed orange as he heated up, it felt like flames licked at your skin as the flesh became mangled to make room for the muscles to expand. you could hear the boys chant your name, their sound muted by your own.

With a new found energy you finally stood, the virus had finally stopped the mutation allowing you to join in the fight. You slowly stalked over to them, flames curling around your fist as you began fighting your way to your friends. J'vao lined up attempting to shoot you or throw punches as best as they could. The few that continued to go after Chris and Leon were stopped by them fairly quickly allowing them to figure out how to leave. "I can't believe she would do this" Leon muttered under his breath as he watched you guard their backs. "Let's just get out of here before it's too late for all of us" Chris responded. He refused to turn around and look at you, hearing your pained cries was enough to confirm what was happening to you. He worked harder to get out, practically punching his way through the door in a desperate attempt. They shouted your name once it was open becoming you to follow them through the doors. Once you had made it back to them you all ran towards the entrance of the workshop, flames snaked up the building as you ran through burning the evidence of what happened today.

The doors slammed open as Leon rushed through them, the cold air cooling your enflamed skin. You fell to the floor with another grunt, your veins felt warm, they blared red underneath your skin. Fatigue began to creep in, maybe it was because you knew you had gotten them out. Your legs gave out as you leant against a rock, your body was now drenched in sweat as the fever continued to climb. You weekly mumbled their name, hand outstretched as you called for them, they stopped calling for backup as they finally turned to look at you since your transformation. Your skin was burnt, some parts raw and blistered. Tears were steaming away as they fell down your cheeks. "I'm sorry" you cried, curling into yourself to keep them away. Leon's hand itched to reach towards you, to comfort you not even caring for the damage he would receive from it. "I just wanted you guys to be okay, I need you both to be okay" you whimpered as you leant your head back against the rock. You could feel your body failing as you watched the flames burn down the building.

Their silence was loud, they bodies stiff unsure how to help you as you sat there practically burning alive. Leon made the first the move, collapsing to the floor a sob threatening to break through his lips as he watched the life fade away from you. "Thank you for protecting us" he managed to choke out, the actions feeling too familiar to when he lost Luis all those years ago. His hands were close to your body where he could feel the heat singe his knuckle hairs, not bothered by the pain. Chris didn't say anything, he couldn't but you didn't miss the silent tear slip down his face as his eyes scanned the area watching out for threats. "I'm so sorry Chris, I didn't want to do this to you again" you cried. You watched his body stiffen when he finally turned to look at you. His tears left a streak on his dirty skin, he bowed his head looking at his hands as if your death made them bloody. As if it was his fault that fate had decided to repeat itself. "It's okay, I promise" he spoke as he sat down next to Leon. You smiled at them both your eyes threatening to close. "Keep fighting for me please" you whispered. They both nodded as they watched you lay back and take your final breath.

Leon and Chris sat waiting for backup looking at you, their hands now clutching yours as your body finally cooled down enough to touch you. Your request still lingered in their minds silently as they both mourned you in their own way.

[strawberrylollipop26-blog-blog]

Movie/Show Round UP

I haven't done one of these in awhile. As always, my thoughts are short and to the point. I don't go in depth. I'm not a professional reviewer, just my thoughts.

Under the cut there are reviews for Fly Me to the Moon, Inside/Out 2, Despicable Me 4, A Quiet Place: Day One, Dune Part 2, Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire, Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes, Bad Boys: Ride or Die, Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire, The Fall Guy, Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga, Civil War, Madame Web, Argylle, Abigail and The Bikeriders. TV shows: Legend of Fei and Halloween Baking Championship.

Fly Me to the Moon: I saw this movie during a three show day at the theater. It was the middle movie and the biggest question mark. Turns out, the whole 'did they or didn't they' land on the moon theory was actually interesting. While I have zero interest in a rewatch, definitely worth attempting for first time viewers.

Inside/Out 2: This movie was exactly the same as the first. There's nothing new here except for possibly children experiencing new emotions. As an adult, I was bored.

Despicable Me 4: Cute. This film added nothing.

A Quiet Place: Day One: I thought it was nicely done. Still, didn't knock my socks off like the first one. My spouse wanted to know exactly how people learned to be quiet. I tried to tell him that they showed it in the second movie. He wanted more of a show. He was also annoyed that we know nothing about the aliens and it's the third movie. Slight spoiler, I wish we didn't know something about a certain character because it would've made the ending decision so much more impactful.

Dune: Part 2: Well, he tried to warn them about what would happen. I like the action that happens even though it all folds into a pretty box.

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire: I barely remember this movie. It was sort of reminiscent of the previous one. A typical unite to defeat the super evil blah blah blah.

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes: Disturbing T!k T0ks regarding the leads aside, this movie was enjoyable. Although, I had no idea a new movie series was starting. There were quite the few holes left so I'd see the second one.

Bad Boys: Ride or Die: I saw this before the previous one so I was quite confused in certain parts. All in all it was enjoyable. There are some funny moments. I've had the urge to watch again.

Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire: I haven't seen this in awhile. From what I remember there's a side character hero in here that's pretty funny. Pretty textbook, you know what's going to happen before it does.

The Fall Guy: I've heard people talking about this one and disliking it. I thought the whole purpose was to have an outrageous fun movie showing crazy stunts the doubles do. Is it the best movie? No, but if you like action it's worth a watch.

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga: I'm an action girl. I highly valued the first Mad Max. This movie is obviously character based therefore slower to catch the stages of development (it's even told in chapters). I was bored. All the story shows in the normal character faced adversity, lived a hard life, finally goes for their revenge. Zero interest in a rewatch. I'll turn on the first one again.

Civil War: A weird movie full of numerous holes. A waste of my time.

Madame Web: I thought it was okay even though this movie was review bombed. There's nothing special about it, but it's not the worst movie that people complained about. Then again, to each their own.

Argylle: Another movie that was review bombed. I also guessed the likely story in this one. I think this movie suffers mostly from trying to be too many things. It goes for serious, yet wild and fun, yet logical. I think if the movie with the effects stayed 'out there' then people would've found it more enjoyable. Maybe.

Sidenote: My husband is always surprised that me (comedy hater) loves Rat Race and Joe Dirt. My response is always the same. Both movies are unapologetically insane. They don't take themselves seriously at all. I think Argylle should've done this as they had moments before deciding to become a serious spy movie.

The Bikeriders: First of all there's a narrator to this movie. Threw me off a bit at first, I normally don't watch those type of movies because i feel it leaves off clues. The movie's okay. Practically a drama in a bikerider setting. There isn't much mystery so another one that's easy to read.

Abigail: I enjoyed this movie until the ending. Not much I can say without spoiling.

Legend of Fei: I finally finished this show. Took me forever as it has good episodes, and others I cared less for (admittedly skipped scenes). Some characters were so annoying. Thankfully, Fei stopped passing out which was killing me. Xie Yun is my absolute fave. I might be biased, but all his scenes were so much fun except for the ones where he's sick :( . I've read reviews where people say they can watch this repeatedly, I'm not one of them. One and done. Sort of reminded me of WoH main storyline.

Sidenote: I love the one scene where he's reminiscing the past in his dreams and he no longer has money. The way this man kept opening up his pouch and dumping it over to make sure there were no coins. So relatable in my younger days.

Halloween Baking Championship: An era has come to an end or at least caught up in the seasons. I really like this cooking show. I hope people have some out of the box creations in the new year coming up.

[genevawrenn]

I haven't said too much on the QSMP situation so I am going to try to at least share my thoughts, as of right now.

First of all : thank you to everyone in this project who did their best through adversity and a corrupt management, you all deserve the world.

To the eggs & capys & penguins & every other admin I will remember the characters you gave us for the rest of my life. Thank you, this past year has been one of my best creativity-wise and I have written nearly as much for this fandom as I did DSMP. You taught me a lot about character writing and found families in times of chaos, I will always think of you fondly.

Now, I want to discuss a few of the things I am disappointed with.

Starting off with how the egg arc ended.

Stories, to have full meaning and impact to me, leave the endings at a point where you want what's best for the characters. You want a chance to see the character development bloom [Hideduo mainly] and having it be so abrupt left us all reeling. It was so awfully familiar as someone who came from DSMP, it left a bitter taste in my mouth.

I do not blame the admins or ccs one bit here.

It's more...I wish there had been at least one last hurrah. Something Avengers level where we watched them all team up, clear out the Federation and maybe the Watcher too, and leave peacefully. Something that gave them all that one last interaction, a reminder of how through trials and trouble anyone on that island would have given their life for any child, their own or otherwise.

Every single person who woke up on that island went through development and due to miscommunication and watching the server slowly perish for months, it feels horrific to watch them all die one by one without being able to see the fruits of their labour. I am begging for fan made content to fill the hole in my heart left by that ending.

It hurts so much because I loved them all so deeply.

I mained Death Family content because I came into this fandom as a crow and adored how their little unit came to be. A son and a daughter with their damaged father who always did their best for one another. Sure, only one *maybe* was good at communication but they all tried. The effort was there. And the old crow hermit on the wall slowly became one of the most trusted members of the island due to the dedication for his family and friends.

Then I slowly became interested in FitMC's content after watching him hang out with Phil for months, and became a huevito instantly. The relationship he created in /rp with Pac was the first time in a long time I allowed myself to indulge in romance-based content [coming from a former SBI main, that should make sense]. I still remember the panic seeing the shipping art covering my timelines and checking boundaries before I realised this was something they both encouraged.

Fit and Pac came to represent a lot in my heart ; two damaged people moving at the pace both decided in order to form the family neither of them ever had. An ex prisoner and a veteran of toxic wastelands found home in one another's lives, enough they allowed their precious children to become bonded with their significant other.

They never said I love you, instead showed it through acts of service and protecting each other without question. They may not have kissed but they were always beside each other within the same space, only a short step away in case either needed support.

I will miss you forever, your characters were fantastic. I hope there are many more collabs in the future, your dynamic means a ton to a lot of people now.

Same goes to many more characters on that island I don't have the energy to do full write ups on but please know, you occasionally show up in my thoughts and another wave of mourning what I love passes over me. Death and Rosa Family were the ones I fixated on, nearly instantly, and I will create using them for a long time. I want to write their characters in a way that satisfies me, I still have to match my level of DSMP writing and beyond after all.

I want to also send appreciation to the streamers I found because of QSMP, it did what was intended and broke language barriers in ways I will forever be grateful to the translations mods that are becoming more common so I can still watch their content.

Cellbit, Baghera, Etoiles, PacTW, Mike, Roier, Luzu, you all are so cool! I enjoy your content and can't wait to watch more in the future.

Philza, Tubbo, Foolish, Charlie Slimecicle, Jaiden, Badboyhalo, FitMC, some of you I knew before and some I got to know better now, I adore you all.

All I hope for at this point is any future project takes what needs to be learned from watching this server slowly implode and please treat your employees right. Especially in creative ventures, we need the hope there can be confidence people are being treated right behind the scenes.

And to any of the QSMP CC's, I beg there are gaming collaborations and meetups in the future. You all have fantastic chemistry and I hope the families that were formed can continue to support each other.

To the admins. Thank you. I could say it a thousand times over and it would never be enough. You endured literal purgatory because you loved the plots and people so much, you deserve only the best in your future.

I intend to indulge in the egg content for the forseeable future, even if at this point I will just be VOD watching but there are still a few POV's I have wanted to watch in full and now seems like the best time. I do have several WIP I wish to finish and they make perfect inserts if I ever need characters for any new plots I imagine in the future.

Saudade QSMP Egg Arc 2023-2024. You taught me a lot within the short period of a year, you united many communities and heres to hoping we stick together long into the future.

I am sorry for the long post, I needed to spill my thoughts somewhere and tumblr's blogging format is ideal.

Let’s keep creating content surrounding the eggs and families we now miss. I understand if many move on but to me, this interest is one I will remember forever and happily talk about to anyone willing to hear me out. Just like Techno, they live on through me as long as I remember them.

[polarisbibliotheque]

Hii!! so i just want to say first that i love love the way you write dmc fanfics. The way you just understand them, makes all their action seem like something they'd do. And well, if it doesn't bother you, may I ask a few advices on how to write Vergil, young and current? I'm trying to write a story and I think your input would be very helpful since you're probably the most accurate Vergil writer there is. Thank you andI just want to say that your fics helped me out a lot mentally. Thank you for bringing the characters to life 🫶

You just left me floored, loved to death, giggling like a 7 year old in public, and I thank you wholeheartedly for that 🖤🖤

First of all, thank you SO much for your words - and wow, I am absurdly flattered that you think so highly of me as a writer, really! I mean, I'm just writing my crazy shenanigans here, I don't expect much hahahaha words like yours make my day and, honestly, you made my whole week!

I am SO happy what I write helped you mentally. I do write to help myself in that regard too, and seeing I was able to have an impact on someone else, it makes everything worth it. That's what Dante would have wanted :')

Asking me for advice doesn't bother me AT ALL! Feel free to ask anytime you want it - by all means I see myself as someone so good as to give advice, but I've gained some experience and it's always good to share! Maybe I'll say something that makes sense to you!

So, without further ado, a few advices on writing Vergil - young and current - down the cut 'cause I haven't written it yet, but knowing myself, I know it's gonna be big :)

(spoiler: it's huge *puts on fool hat and jingles away*)

I sprinkled some things here and there about Dante and Vergil on this blog, but I think it'll be nice putting it all together in one place!

I recently got an ask about which MBTI personality I think it's Dante and Vergil, and there's a LOT on BOTH of their characters in there. You can find it here.

(I won't repeat the things I wrote there, 'cause oh boy this one's got bigger than I expected)

But oh, Verge, this little emotionally constipated goth man *sighs* he's Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. I'm not even joking.

But all of that aside, I do keep a few things in mind when writing him. I've said before I have many similar personality traits with him and I think it makes it easier for me to write this little bitch (affectionate).

Vergil is pretty much shaped by his trauma. You could argue Dante is as well, but differently from his twin brother, Vergil never really found acceptance. Yes, the twins lived through the same thing but the fact that Eva managed to save Dante and not Vergil is crucial to both characters.

Dante has survivor's guilt and depression from all that happened. He can't keep a deep connection to save his life, 'cause he keeps everyone at bay - he thinks his demonic blood is a curse and he is the reason everyone perishes. So it's best if people keep away from him.

But even with that, Dante loves being around people. It's what makes him so fond of his human part and, in my opinion, it's what made Dante healthier than Vergil. He seeks connection and humanity, he wants to use his strength to protect the weak - like Eva once used hers and sacrificed herself to protect and save him. That is crucial to Dante's character.

Vergil, in the other hand, believed for a LONG time he was left for dead. That his mother chose to save his brother because she loved Dante more and Vergil was left to die. He was left all alone in the cold, in a cemetery filled with demons who slaughtered him in quite a gruesome manner. If he hadn't find the rage, strength and power inside of himself that day, he wouldn't have survived.

Vergil learned he is on his own, his own family didn't love him (even if he was wrong, that's the impression he had for a LONG time) and the only one he could count on was himself. That made him withdraw completely: be wary of people and their intentions, shut himself to the world, allow only strength and power to come through his personality and keep his vulnerabilities and feelings shut down in the darkest and most protected place of himself because if he didn't, that could be his death.

Vergil didn't learn to protect the weak, because he wasn't protected when he was weak. He learned to survive, because when he needed the most, no one was there and his own will was the only thing that could save him. If he had given up, he would've died - no one would come, no knight in shiny armor, no powerful protecting demon, no sacrificing loving human mother.

✨That's why he's an asshole✨

Hahahaha jokes aside, that's why he's so laser focused on power, I think. When he was younger (around DMC 3), he finds Dante again and there's a hatred for his brother because he believed he was left to die and wasn't loved as much as Dante (as always, our red devil being a clueless himbo who just got lucky to be around Eva, poor guy). He wants to prove he is better than Dante, that he was worth something, that he too was worth saving - even more than his brother.

To some extent, up until that moment in DMC 3, Vergil is better than Dante (regarding power). He's got a lot of knowledge and control over his demonic heritage, things Dante didn't even know he could do. But Vergil is so blinded by his hurt and in so much pain he can only deem himself worthy if he beats Dante down, if he wins, if he gets all the power in the world.

I don't think he ever wanted to kill Dante - he just wanted to win. Like a kid, going "see, mom, dad, I win, I'm worth as much as Dante!!" - quite tragic, really.

With his power thing, it's not a desire for power for it's own sake, but as an armor. Given everything that happened to him, that Vergil has this thing of "only I can protect myself and I can count only on myself to save my life", it's very understandable that his logic takes him to the path of "if I am the most powerful being in this world, I will never bleed and I will never hurt again".

So, even if he says on the outside he is power hungry because he wants to honor his demonic heritage and humans are weak, on the inside it's actually that he's trying to carve his heart out from himself so he won't feel nothing and stop hurting - as well as gain all the power he can so NO ONE can make him feel scared, vulnerable, weak and powerless like he did that night when no one appeared to help him.

Vergil hides his pain under a mask of cruelty and hubris - since being honest means being vulnerable to him and that is something he's got a deep aversion to.

Current Verge has dragged himself out of Hell in a crumbling body. If Dante hadn't "killed" him as Nelo Angelo, he probably would've never been free of his shackles with Mundus, but once again he was left for dead (even if not intentionally, I know Dante would have gone through all the layers of Hell to bring his brother back, but VERGIL doesn't know that). Once again, Vergil had to muster all his will, his power, his demonic heritage to drag himself out of that godforsaken place.

He didn't know Nero was his son, he just took Yamato back 'cause he didn't really had time to explain everything that was going on. Vergil was on the brink of death, it's not like he could think logically about everything he was doing and weight pros and cons. He needed to survive. That's what he does.

It's only when he separated his human and demon parts that he came to realize a bunch of things - because Vergil never really had time to do anything else other than surviving; and thinking too much, going over your feelings and past trauma, doesn't do anything good when you're stuck in survival mode (been there, done that).

After he gets both of his parts together and goes back to being Vergil, he knows a lot more than he did before, because V allowed his heart to feel and to process all that pain he didn't allow himself to process before - because if he did, he would probably break, like V himself was falling to pieces.

He knows his mother loved him. He knows it wasn't Dante's fault. He knows it was all a tragedy and no one is to blame - he knows he wasn't left there to die: Eva died trying to get to him. It honestly changes everything he's been thinking for the past 40 (if I'm not wrong...?) years.

That's why he wonders, if he was in Dante's place all those years ago, would that change something? And honestly, it probably would. Because everything Vergil did was from a wound he couldn't bring himself to heal from that fateful night.

Therefore, current Vergil is a lot more accepting to his feelings - but internally only, he won't let it show. He also understands his thing of wanting to surpass Dante wasn't his brother's fault and it's something he has to work on.

Not saying he won't be a little bitch sparring with Dante all the time and keeping score over stupid stuff, because that's EXACTLY how these two function - but now Vergil is fueled by healthy sibling rivalry and fun instead of inferiority complex and pain/hatred.

Vergil's path is a lot similar to Anakin from Star Wars: fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate and hate leads to the Dark Side of the Force. If the Jedi Council had understood Anakin's upbringing as a slave, his deep love for his mother - and for all the beings on the Universe, I argue, because he did want to become a Jedi to free all slaves - his overflowing empathy, his deep feelings, his love for Padmé, etc., Anakin wouldn't find himself vulnerable to the grooming of an older man who saw all this and took the opportunity to twist it all to make him feel pain, fear, anger and hate.

If Qui-Gon Jin had trained Anakin he would've never turned to the Dark Side, I will DIE on this hill and fight EVERYONE, even if I love Obi-Wan

Star Wars ramblings aside, that's Vergil in a nutshell. And I think with him older, currently, he can finally see all of that, because he had a chance to be just demonic, as Urizen, and just human, as V - noticing how everything that happened to him shaped him to feel pain, fear, anger and hate, doing desperate things to protect himself and feel safe.

I argue Vergil hasn't felt safe for a single day in his whole lifetime, and that matters. Because in the end, that's how I write him: a wounded stray dog who knows only pain and hatred from the outside world.

If you try to approach him, he'll first bare his teeth, bark and try to bite you - not because he's mean, but because he's stuck in survival mode and that's his first response to ANYTHING. Just like a wounded stray, you have to approach carefully, offer kindness and show him you're not there to hurt him.

And just like a stray dog, he'll eventually melt and accept that kindness - he just has NO IDEA how that feels like.

✨What about Nero's mother, I hear you ask?✨

Hahahaha so that one I have some doubts myself. I often imagine two scenarios and I still haven't chose one of them to satisfy my heart HAHAHAHA

That might be me projecting, of course, but because of ALL THAT, I don't see Vergil as being open to relationships and one night stands - he takes things too seriously, and that's part of his character.

He either decided to try it out empirically with a one night stand with someone who was kind to him and he wanted to understand that kind of experience to understand himself better and out of curiosity (look, I know this sounds crazy, but that's exactly what I did on my first kiss with a super random guy at a party and I was like "oh, well, that's not for me, I'm gonna stick to kissing people I love, this sucks" and it took a weight off my shoulders)

oooooor he was treated with kindness for the first time in his life and that broke him for a while, he melted under a soft touch and gentle words and couldn't resist trying out new experiences he only had by proxy from his books - and when he woke up next morning, he was reminded how broken he is, how powerless, how not worthy of love not even from his own mother, and left because that would lead to nowhere. Because of him. Because he wasn't worth it - she probably fell for his looks, his heritage, his outside, but when she knew his inside she would run in horror.

Again, Vergil has a lot of issues, the poor man.

When I'm writing Nemesis, we have young Vergil - laser focused on power, proud as fuck, stepping over anything and everything to get what he wants, because life favors the ones who survive. The weak ones should die, that's the law of the jungle and he won't waste his time saving those who can't do it for themselves like he did for himself. When he sees the reader struggling to keep fighting him to protect others, he sees not only Eva, but himself in a will of a survivor who will go through excruciating pain to save themselves. He values that and admires that - admiring the reader as an enemy and having utmost respect.

When he's older, he's trying. And he has a LOT to learn - but his partner has to understand he's the stray dog who knows nothing but harshness. Vergil is quiet, methodical and disciplined, knowing how to live only with himself as company. But now he has a family: he has his brother back, he has a son, he has the whole crew to live alongside him. That's new, harrowing and comforting at the same time.

So, when in doubt, think about how a wounded animal would react - and how you would have to act to be able to approach and help.

Vergil, differently from Dante, is forever stuck in survival mode and has forsaken his humanity so he could keep going. As a younger man, he's ruthless and won't spare efforts to get what he wants because he is desperately trying to not feel vulnerable and worthless as he usually feels. As an older man, he's trying - in his own stupid Mr. Darcy way - to recover, to understand himself better and finally heal that horrible wound in his heart.

But of course. He is still proud, observing, regal and prone to overkill here and there and showing off his skills. These are all inherent to his personality.

(Also. Vergil enjoys some dumb fun sometimes - he only lets it show a tiny little bit when competing with Dante over ANYTHING. If Dante says he can eat a cheeseburger in three bites, Vergil will go above and beyond to eat it in two. Everyone thinks he's just being stupidly competitive with Dante and wants to win against his brother no matter what, but that's just his way of being fun)

Phew! That's quite a lot on the blue devil! Hahaha it isn't everything I keep in mind - of course there are the other things like him being reserved, more on the quiet side, intellectual, methodical, a lover of beauty (like literature, philosophy, poems, etc.), stupidly independent... But I think those traits are more "worldwide" known.

If you take all his trauma and how it affected him into consideration, I think, his personality follows easily. You understand a lot better how he would react in certain situations - in the end, that's what being a writer is all about: creating characters and watching how all of them react to situations given their backgrounds and baggage!

I'm so sorry it's such a HUGE answer, but I do hope it helps. There's a lot to unpack and I didn't want to just "oi, he's a traumatized asshole, that's it" - because you miss the nuances if you just work with that perspective.

Thanks a lot for asking, though, I had fun writing this little essay on Vergil, the man, the myth, the legend HAHAHAHAHAHA

Hope you have a nice weekend and have fun writing!! If you need any advice, even on writing in general, you can always ask me again! As you can see, I'm happy to help and I do love sharing what I know xD