#i want to be girlfriend!!!!!!!
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pondering my orb
#personal#it appears i have fallen victim to the situationship industrial complex#this little arrangement i found myself in has escalated from ‘friends who hook up’ to ‘boyfriend without the boy’#and it is becoming lets say emotionally distressing#because i am leaving town for the summer in just three short weeks! and for the past two months we have spent every free moment together#and putting our own individual codependent tendencies aside i really do like him#i havent been alone long enough to shift my brain out of girlfriend mode#because the thing is i loved being a girlfriend#apparently it was a significant part of my identity#which i didnt really realize until i wasnt one anymore#and i miss it!#i dont even miss the boyfriend i was the girlfriend of particularly#i just miss being a girlfriend i think#and now i have found a man who i would very much like to be the girlfriend of#hes respectful and emotionally intelligent and he fucks me so good and we have a lot of fun together i think#but the thing is is that i cant be a girlfriend again#because since it was such a significant part of my identity now that i am no longer a girlfriend i have lost that piece#and i guess i dont know what is supposed to go in its place#who am i if not girlfriend? what do i do when i am not girlfriending? who do i talk to when its not my boyfriend?#my life purpose is certainly not ‘girlfriend’#i mean its not supposed to be. i was pretty happy with it but everyone in my life is telling me thats not what im supposed to do#so what am i supposed to do???? i dont like being alone i dont want to be#i want to be girlfriend!!!!!!!#i was happy and i felt fulfilled#sure it was for the wrong person but the right one will come along#im not very good at the whole casual dating thing though. i mean clearly#because this man is probably not boyfriend material either#as much as i like him it is questionable whether he deserves my girlfriending#so how does one find ‘the’ boyfriend?#is it a futile exercise in the first place
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The realest part of the Barbie Movie was when Barbie was like "okay but what if this hurts his feelings? what if this makes him sad? :(" after Ken stole her house, stole her car, and stole her agency, because as a woman you still have to second guess everything you do on the assessment of whether it might hurt a man's feelings.
And then that apprehension was proven right one million times over by the entire Conservative Internet Manosphere pissing and shitting and screaming themselves hoarse over Barbie daring to hurt a man's feelings.
#barbie#barbie movie#also if the genders were reversed and Ken's character was a woman everyone would fucking _hate_ her im just saying#'petty bratty bitchy girlfriend wants to steal everything her boyfriend owns because she learned about feminism'#everyone would HATE her#but because Ken's a man everyones pissing frothing review is about how shittily he was treated and how shitty the men are treated blah blah#(I fucking loved Ken in the movie but I'm saying this with confidence: Everyone would hate female!Ken if this was reversed)
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You know what I always think about? Percy is the classic funny boyfriend. He’s sarcastic and witty. Some of his jokes are sharp and clever, many are corny dad jokes. But nevertheless he’s hilarious. And yet, Rick rarely writes Annabeth laughing at his jokes. I feel like he thinks it’s empowering for Annabeth to just roll her eyes or scold him every time. But he’s funny asf!! Let his girlfriend think he’s funny!
There’s a scene in HoH where Percy makes Annabeth laugh when they’re climbing down a cliff, and she has to tell him to stop so she doesn’t fall to her death. Then in CotG, Percy says something and Annabeth smiles against her will, and it makes Percy so happy. Those scenes are rare, but so. damn. cute. That said, I wish Annabeth wasn’t always trying so hard not to laugh at his jokes. I want to see him be able to make her smile and laugh so easily that it’s not even fair to her. I mean, the guy can drop banger after banger—there’s so much opportunity.
If these new books are supposed to be lower stakes, give me percabeth laughter. Give me Percy cracking bad jokes and Annabeth bursting out laughing with no shame. Give me her cackling at his witty comment so hard that her abs hurt and tears fall from her eyes. Even though we know Percy is conventionally attractive, give me Grover making a joke that the reason Annabeth likes Percy so much is because she spends so much time with her eyes closed since she’s always laughing. I want people to think they’re kinda annoying. I want to see their friends giving them side eyes from across the table because Percy’s making Annabeth laugh so hard that it’s disrupting the whole room.
Annabeth’s reluctance to laugh made sense before they were dating and were bickering 24/7, when they didn’t want to show their true feelings. But that’s not the case anymore. And don’t get me wrong, it really frustrates me how Rick seems to be rapidly reducing Percy to simply being “the funny guy.” He’s stripping him of so many qualities and compensating with double the cheesy humor. But the worst part is that even when being funny is all Rick will allow him to be, Percy still doesn’t get to be the funny boyfriend. It’s as if he wants Annabeth to be too mature for her boyfriend’s bad humor. But if Percy is going to continue be diminished to the stupid, annoying guy who can’t take things seriously, the LEAST Rick can do is give him the ability to easily make his girlfriend laugh.
#let the poor guy make his girlfriend laugh#make it so annabeth is powerless against his humor#i just want to see rick put them back on the same level#not the weird dynamic he’s developed where annabeth is like his mother#they’re besties and battle partners#let them have fun together#pjo#hoo#percy jackson#annabeth chase#percabeth#percy jackson and the olympians#heroes of olympus#rick riordan#riordanverse
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the problem is that being single is seen as the consolidation prize, and not the natural neutral state of being-a-person. at the end of the movie or the book or the poetry, there is a person waiting for you at the altar, and they love you. if the play is a comedy, everyone gets married. the metaphor is about how you are not-whole. the metaphor is about how everyone is going to be happily-ever-after. the metaphor is that romantic love is the most important resource on the planet, not just all-love. all-love is not a thing, that is a disappointment. the treasure is not the friends we made along the way. the treasure is the girl you landed.
the metaphor is that you cannot be alone, that means you are broken. are you getting over someone? that is acceptable, you can be getting over someone, but not for long. you must be single because you would rather not be single. you must be single and looking to not-be-single. you must want to date, eventually.
friendship and community are never seen as being equal-to or even-better than romantic connection. that person is your one! you need to find them. you need to hunt through the sand particles until you can shift out some kind of gem. this is regardless to your own experience of the beach and the sun. you need to be somewhere with someone.
if you are taking this time alone to heal, that is so sad. everyone gives you this little pitying look. the understanding is that you are not actually happier than you were before you were single. it is seen as a sort of pity - oh, you are choosing yourself, making yourself the priority? - that isn't quite right. you must mean that you are making yourself ready for the right person. you are just laying the bed better this time. open up your heart. you'll find them, we promise!
what do you mean you're really-truly genuinely-very happy? you are probably misremembering what it was like to be in a relationship. and besides, once you meet your person, that time will look grey and bland and wasted. your person is the only way for you to see in color. so what if you have taken this time - for the first time in your entire life - to actually-for-real do the fucking work. you can be proud of yourself, sure. but the way we need to know that you got better is that you get a partner. you're healed enough for the next bad part!
people don't choose to be single, they just say they're choosing to be single - they actually mean "nobody wants to date me." it doesn't matter how many people you have gently rejected or how many times you've talked it over carefully in therapy. what matters is that you are single, and by all accounts - that means you are something worth our pity. your successes and life all seem pale in the sunlight. sure, you have done amazing things and finally found your way in life. what matters is that there wasn't a person in the room with you while you did it.
you want to tell them - that's the whole thing. i didn't know how to be alone in the room. i didn't know how to handle the silence. every moment was so sharp, and i kept choosing the wrong way to close the door. i have spent my entire life in the empty well, living in the ricochet of someone else's cruelty. for once i have built myself a ladder. for once everything i taste is all mine, every bite of sunshine and laughter. i have learned how to sleep out in the open with my memories. recently, they have started to purr.
your father rolls his eyes. listen. this isn't about you. i just want a grandchild in my future.
#writeblr#i actually didn't want a girlfriend before nat#and my dad recently said to me - raquel. i don't approve of the promiscuity#1. i am 30.#2. i had casually dated about 4 people over 18 months.#3. i do believe he was just mad that i get more girls than he ever did#i had to look this 60 yr old deacon in the eye and say. okay so i have a girlfriend first of all im just not tellin yall about her#and secondly.#OKAY???? OLD MAN I DONT EVEN LIVE HERE WHAT ARE U GONNA DO ABOUT IT#briefly considered asking nat if i could pretend we were a one night stand kind of a thing
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pin-up
b&w originals
#my art#basslinegrave art#venture bros#dr. girlfriend#dr. mrs. the monarch#the monarch#henchman 21#ok so. pin up and pinned butterflies. tell me thats not the best idea ever#did i manage to pull it off how i wanted? maaybe? i do like these but i wish i had used the same color settings for all#when using the howsitcalled. gradient map things. because they dont look as uniform#but i was lazy to redo dr mrs especially plus i like how she looks i just couldnt get monarch and 21 the same#also somehow these look better and more colorful on my pc?? usually its on my phone i dont know what happened#also i ended up adding one colored thing to each because i first colored in dr. mrs' eyes#then realized the other two dont have colored eyes but 21 has the red lenses. but monarch??#i only went over the logo on his chest a bit with a more reddish color but its not too visible so well#imagine its better and they all match properly...#hope i got the butterfly names right#those were last minute additions after i learned about the viceroy butterfly yesterday#dr mrs is a queen butterfly#ask to tag#suggestive#wanted to put that as one of the top tags but i wrote it with a typo so i hope tumblr picks it up this low#also forgor to say i put my crunch handle on these cause they were meant to go on that blog ignore that#i think i forgot to add one to monarch or i hid it that well lmao#my 2 braincells rubbed the wrong way
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some fem jegulus art ive been collecting over time + special cherry regulus for @messymoony
#mar do you u know she is always on mind i want her so bad its not even funny im downright delusional#srry guys im shamelessly putting them in the butch lesbian with the pretty doll girlfriend stereotype#regulus black#james potter#regulus black fanart#jegulus#james potter fanart#jegulus fanart#marauders fanart#marauders#my art#fem jegulus
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hey does anyone know if we have GLaDOS tomorrow
#I have no idea how to draw heavy mech like her im so sorru. I just wanted to draw my wife and girlfriend and her beautiful parts and wires#portal#portal 2#GLaDOS#my art
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okay now please doodle Charles and Edwin’s wedding. Also love your art it’s so cute and loveable in a way
Sherwani for Charles and morning dress for Edwin, yay
ko-fi
And you get a little headcanon/concept
At some point during their friendship, way before Port Townsend, Charles mentioned the tradition of wearing gold at weddings. He did so in a sad sort of way, as he had seen the pictures from his parents wedding, and knew her mum had not been allowed to wear a lehenga nor many gold accessories.
Maybe, as these things are meant to bring happiness to the couple, he mentions that as a child he believed his parents marriage would have been happier if she wore those things.
Edwin starts to collect gold items. He doesn't analyze the reason, but if a case offers gold as payment? Edwin is taking it. Charles thinks nothing of it, it's just one of Edwin's quirks.
After his revelations in Port Townsend, Edwin will eventually realize a few things regarding his gold rush.
And they will have a lot of gold jewlery for their wedding day!
#ask ask ask#dead boy detectives#dbda#payneland#edwin x charles#alright so i knew i wanted charles in a sherwani though i did not know the name#to make things easier for myself i decided he's punjabi#that being said he is biracial so i didn't know if should incorporate something from his british heritage as well#i decided that meh the ceremony will be british enough#also i added some details#to both his and edwin's outfit#that are not very traditionally masculine#this is a very queer wedding#i was so scared of this request people you have no idea#thank you girlfriend for dealing with me rambling about it
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my big chicken waif
#dunmeshi spoilers#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#falin touden#chimera falin#lmk if u guys want this as a print…#i was struggling with this one a lot i kept going back and forth drawing her face…im not the happiest with it#but i cant look at it anymore so im posting it… i still like the composition quite a lot ^_^#anyways. done rambling i love her… my huge monster girlfriend she can crush me i do notcare
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do you think freesia and jd would ever get back together? or will they stay sort-of friends?
I'm not going to lie, I kinda like the idea of them starting to date again and seeing where it takes them. 🙈 freesia sneaked into my heart for some reason (she kind of started this new trend of mine where i make ocs that were created to be dicks and then me just getting protective of them and trying to reason out their awful behavior kasjsdj)
also their ship already has a #1 hater and #1 supporter, both of which are doing it for the wrong reasons...
#bruce and clay join the fandom once floyd sends them letters saying he's been eating good ksjbhbfchf#trolls#dreamworks trolls#trolls floyd#trolls branch#trolls john dory#freesia#trolls band together#this was a lot funnier in my head. i guess that's what you get when you don't lay down your panels from the start#my art#answered#freesia was all four of the brother's first crush (sorry i don't make the rules. it's just facts)#even floyd's who i headcanon is exclusively gay#jd and her started dating pretty young#and the other three had kid crushes on her because she was the big brothers cool girlfriend that made jd behave nice to them lmao#also almond and plum brownies <3#floyd jd and branch all live in a sitcom in my head#it's beautiful#also i started coloring this and then i realized i actually DON'T want to spend another day on this when i can be drawing NEW comics
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Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.
#dungeon meshi#laios touden#toshiro nakamoto#chilchuck tims#kabru#BF in this context could be boyfriend or best friend. The line is so blurry.#Chilchuck less so but whatever is going on between Shuro and Laios & Kabru and Laios is giving strong:#“dude if you were a girl I'd date the hell out of you”. And from the genderswap extra's that sentiment is canon for BOTH.#This was made prior to the translation of the Laios & Kabru & Shuro restaurant date comic and honestly I am just feeling vindicated.#I don't even know what to call this dynamic other than a situationship. There is so much going on between all of them.#Even on a purely platonic reading - the miscommunication and male yearning for friendship hurt so bad.#When we got the Big Hug scene in the epilogue arc I was whooping and hollering! Pure catharsis moment!#I also don't like hugs very much so I really felt it went Shuro ('hates being touched') went in for the bear hug.#Do not get me started on the agony of 'always lying' Kabru telling the truth (I just wanted to be friends)#and 'always believes' Laios thinking it's another lie and brushing him off.#I am once again supporting dungeon meshi day by posting art. Please watch dungeon meshi.#obligatory edit because I’m tired: YES. Chilchuck cares for Laios and him admitting it was a huge part of his arc#YES he is more just fed up with him that actually hating him.#I needed a third guy to be canonically done with his ass for the THREE WEED SMOKING GIRLFRIENDS reference
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finally managed to finish this. i forgot how fun it is to draw pretty girls, so here's some more genderbend ls designs :3 they're a little rushed, but i still like them.
#lifesteal fanart#lifesteal smp#princezam#mapicc#roshambogames#branzycraft#clownpierce#duality duo#clownzy#i cannot draw them together and not make it look gay it just happens on itself.....#im kind of proud of these actually#i will do more later im just too tired rn...#i want to give my fem branzy a lil kiss#but i wont cause i dont want to get murdered by her tall clown girlfriend#like girl share :/#☆ my art .
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day 29: and then I found you ♡
(femslashfeb prompt list)
#minifemslashfeb2024#skip to loafer#skip and loafer#yuzumako#makoto kurume#yuzuki murashige#SHOUJO MANGA JUMPSCARE#they are so so sweet they deserve each other#their arc just makes me so happy I want more of them#besties.... girl best friends... best girlfriends even
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I've never really self-identifed as butch because my style sensibility leans more toward effeminate gay man/eccentric grandparent but while my girlfriend was visiting, the clasps that held the shoulder strap of her handbag kept breaking (thanks temu), and finally I got fed up and fixed it by
a) wrenching off the old clasps with a pair of plyers and
b) replacing them with the only clasps I had on hand, which were 2 giant carabiners
and yeah, now that I think about it, that is incredibly butch lesbian behavior.
#butch lesbian#butch4femme#my girlfriend calls me her butch which#was kinda offputting at first because#as much as I wanted to id as butch#it felt wrong to claim that label with my floral print shirts and pastels and sparkly eyeshadow#I still struggle with it somewhat but it makes me happy#to be butch in my beloveds eyes#and everything that means to her#(someone to protect and take care of them#someone who fixes broken things and solves difficult problems#a romantic gesturer and a prince)#anyway sorry for the#tag rant#enjoy the silly story#of me definitely without a doubt#butchin it up over here#cara mia#acornposting
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#considered posting this to my 'main' for a second but then realized i just post most ship art here so it goes here.#now the real question should i use the main tags or stick to a ship tag. but i think the tags might be empty anyway so dont mind if i do#my art#monarch a trois#dr. girlfriend#henchman 21#the monarch#dr mrs the monarch#uhhhh#venture bros#vbros#ask to tag#im new here i have no idea what tags to use 🫡#i mainly just wanted to draw them all together cause yknow. they could be a thing#so yeah this is ship art but take it however you want#ALSO i got very lazy with the clothes and coloring i honestly just wanted to do a pose like this and then didnt really want to think abt#the clothes and then when it came to coloring i considered leaving them in all black but it was hard to see them then#so i added a tiny bit of color after having this sit in my files for over a week#i want to draw them more but i have no ideas at all im just imagining them having like movie nights whenever they can nd stuff#i loved how domestic the show got to depict them being somehow. injecting the scenes where theyre in their kitchen into my bloodstream#but now that sheila isnt a part of the villain trio its like ough... leaving the boys home alone in their r/malelivingspace#garys s7 room 💀#also i cropped this cause i could not be bothered to draw shoes. i actually drew them for dr gf and monarch but i gave up on garys#<- has not drawn shoes in months because of liking cartoon animals that dont wear them
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sometimes i’m sooooo blown away by the fact that kevin is so smart……. like yes he is the fox with the highest grades despite being also the fox with the tightest training schedule and yes he canonically gets called an obsessive genius and yes the extra content explicitly says he is both very smart and very willing to teach people. but really i am thinking about kevin playing reporters like fiddles, jean calling kevin too good of a liar to ever let anything slip, kevin going up to andrew post-game and wordlessly helping cover up the fact andrew is off his medicine by pretending andrew’s racquet had broken (and then proceeding to discreetly crush it in his hand when the foxes gather around andrew), kevin living a lifetime of walking on the edge of riko’s knife, kevin hiding french, hiding thea, kevin spotting potential from a mile away, kevin who even riko thought was brilliant and sharp-tongued. yeah……..!
#hes really one of the smartest aftg characters my sister deserves some credit#book smart and media smart#he could start a cult if he wanted to but he doesnt he just wants to play exy#its actually really really really cool to me that kevin is smart but his motives are so simple#he wants to live. he wants to play exy. he wants jean to be happy. he wants andrew to enjoy exy. he wants neil to live#yeah he could use all those smarts for evil but he doesnt want to he wants to use them for fun and for texting thea and for exy#i dont know if my point is getting across here but i just i really like him………….. kevin is so simple minded and yet so smart#he wants a world of people falling over each other like puppies and if he didnt we would be fucked but he does#kevin is really the first healthy manipulative girlfriend#kevin#txt
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