#i wanna be someone different
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#so many of my friends have boyfriends rn#and its driving me mad#not because im jealous cause im queer#but because i feel so alone and unlovable#im so happy for them but ik its never gonna happen to me#i wanna be someone different
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An old friend
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#aj art#marcille donato#chilchuck#Something something they both think an elven lifespan is too long#But for different reasons#She thinks it’s unfair that only elves live that long and wants to make everyone else live that same amount of time#He thinks it’s too much time for someone to live and is very content with the lifespan he has#This isn’t meant to be romantic but if u wanna interpret it that way knock urself out#I just really like their friendship#I like that after [spoilers] he’s the one who takes care of her hair for her#And that his lifespan makes her shut down when it’s brought up#And that he’s the first one to tell her that a thousand years is way too much time#Oufhhghfhrhfhfh marchil my marchils
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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I genuinely love not having a crush like I’m not over here feeling physically sick over some mid guy being dry to me I’m literally chilling
#Spring semester of last year was so bad bc I was unironically into 3 guys at once and they were all#Being dry and cryptic to me#And then before that in 2022 I had my horrid situationship#I had a mini obsession arc in dec 2023 over someone but now there hasn’t been anyone since#And my palette is so cleansed#When a girl is like I miss having a crush I’m like you’re literally a masochist#There was very briefly a girl I thought I had a crush on when I realized I’m bicurious but#I haven’t put effort into talking to her bc the idea of pursuing anyone makes me wanna claw my eyes out#I’m pretty sure I ghosted her by like just not responding to her last messsge actually#Not on purpose but more so bc I realized I was feeling the same anxiety I felt whenever I had a crush so I was like#Yeah I’m dropping this for now#I’m also always the most present for my friends when I don’t have a crush so idk#Like I don’t wanna be consumed by anyone I just wanna chill#The solution to not having normal attraction to people is just to not be attracted to anyone at all#I fr cracked it#I always just crave the butterflies out of it and never an actual relationship anyway#But they’re so not worth it#Which is why I always get bored of guys who’re forthright like oh ok you actually WANT something…. U don’t wanna just have fun#Not for me#I think the guys I’m into and I typically diverge in the sense that neither of us wants a relationship but they just wanna fuck me#And I more so just want the butterflies experience / to playact couple for like a couple months but nothing too serious#Which is why it never works#Like it’s not that it doesn’t work bc either of us wants a relationship it’s more that what we want out of the situationship is different#So lame#Ok this was a lot but I literally came to this epiphany while writing these tags
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i really wanna see worstie logan interact with logan from x1-x3. i see worstie absolutely destroying the baby cuz his insults are ten times harsher and he’s legally allowed to say the f word more than once.
like i think he’d find the younger logan pretty annoying and see right through his little bad boy act. not saying that worstie is any more mature or cool but he’s definitely been through a lot more and i’d love to see him react to the sassy “young” version of himself
#bonus is i wanna see worstie and wade interact with this little kitten#baby log doesn’t really stand a chance here i fear#hes sassy but his comebacks are weak and he laughs at his own jokes#worstie can absolutely destroy someone#i mean he managed to render wade speechless for a bit#idk i just wanna see them interact i love putting a bunch of different logans in situations with each other#worst wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool & wolverine#logan howlett#wolverine#james howlett#poolverine#james logan howlett
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Torn apart. Inspired by Romeo and Juliet by Sergio Cupido
#rdr2#morston#john marston#arthur morgan#red dead redemption 2#rdr#red dead redemption#arthur/john#john/arthur#morstonmonday#morston monday#hewo! happy to be here for another monday with you guys hehe#ALSO i wanna say. someone else did a redraw of them as this painting before kjhfgk#i had no idea and only saw it after i already started the wip#JUST KNOW ITS NOT LIKE. ORIGINAL AT ALL I JUST;;; HAVE LOTS OF THOUGHTS + EMOTIONS#but yeah idk if the many disembodied dutch hands keeping them apart makes sense to anyone but me#but like something something that man's actions ultimately were what tore them apart#as well as growing up under his care/influence inevitably created the wedge in between them#as well as the perceived rivalry over whos the favorite son or whatever#and then in more fucky terms. i like to imagine he was fucking them both and preventing them from doing the same with one another :)#something something that wouldn't be right but i know better so it's different with me#or whatever#sorry to spew my dutch grooming agenda all over you guys on this good monday. it will happen again#ANYWAY#again hope this resonates with anyone other than me lol#my art
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Something I like about Leo is that he’s honestly really chill? It’s easy to remember the moments where he’s being obnoxious or excitable but I feel like most of the time he’s incredibly “go with the flow” and has an overall affable demeanor.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#Genuinely speaking I feel like said demeanor is incredibly useful for when he has to charm and/or persuade people into listening to him#I have a whole post talking about Leo’s charm and how he consistently gets people to hear him out even if he’s annoyed or upset them#like they’ll still listen to what he has to say in full#his charisma stat is real and utilized quite often in this series I swear he’s not just a loser cringeboy all the time 😭#if he wants to persuade and/or charm then he honestly sooo often does#me listing the 400th reason why Leo grows up to be the worlds best ninja and a good 365 of those reasons are Leo’s various subterfuge skill#Like most episodes where he’s not the main focus (and even many where he is)#he’s a voice of reason who notices things quickly and is often the one taking point to talk down situations#something interesting I found between Leo and Mikey is that#Mikey tells people what they need to hear#Leo tells people what they want to hear#not only out of his own agenda either#when bullhop was wrecking their home leo was the one that negotiated to make the situation go smoother#even if he would have rather bullhop left#meanwhile Mikey is the one who bluntly tells things as it is#small character moment that means a lot to me#Mikey is an honest boy who is upfront about his feelings#Leo prefers to let people make their own decisions he wants them to through steering the convo in that direction#but he is easily cowed by guilt#regardless leo is a people person - he knows how to talk to them and how to manipulate/persuade#and I like that his bros know this and often push him forward to do the talking if they wanna charm someone into doing what they want#I think Leo’s hope speeches are also an example of this - he’s saying what people really want to hear (and often it’s ALSO what they NEED)#the further the series goes on the higher Leo’s inner stress rises and he just keeps that chill aura anyway#there’s a reason!!! he wanted to go to a SPA so badly!!#literally the first thing he does when he gets in is rest#no joke meditation would do him good? like- it’s a Leo thing and I genuinely think rise leo would be no different here
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I hate the insistence in pushing Jason into the batfamily.
If he doesn't wanna go to dinner, he doesn't have to. If he doesn't wanna hang out with them, he doesn't have to. If he doesn't want to see them, he doesn't have to. If he doesn't even want to contact them, he doesn't have to.
It's so annoying to read fic and always see it presented as his Family Knows Better. Jason is just being silly by not realizing how much they love him and he just needs to let them break into his home and comms and life because they want him there.
#my dc posting#jason todd#red hood#batfamily#like genuinely how do yall write this shit n not realize how fucked it is#i hear jason say he doesnt wanna do something w his family and im like HELL YEAH ASSERT UR BOUNDARIES#him being strongarmed into dinner despite knowing its gonna be a shitshow n judged heavily if he doesnt show is like. a fucking staple#of fic and im SOOO done w it#do none of you think? really do you even think??#ig its the difference in perspective between viewing the batfamily as the Ultimate Good thing. the place they all should strive to be#instead of the mess of toxicity and stalking n abusiveness it is#and even in content where the batfamily is actually as healthy as they can be jason still doesnt have to do anything w em!!!#hes completely justified to not contact them. thats his fucking choice and boundary n writing his family prancing right past all that#does Not endear me to them sorryy!!#i once saw someone explain jason as low-contact and i was like. yeah. i love that. let me have that please#its not that i hate seeing him in the batfam. i just think it should be HIS choice
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I hate it when people don’t take aromanticism seriously. I hate it when they say “oh it’s just a phase I also thought I was aromantic but then I got a partner.” It doesn’t apply to everyone.
Respect aromanticism as you would respect any other identity
#aromanticism#aro#aromantic#arospec#aromantism#aro pride#there’s this girl who’s flirting with me and me being on the aro spectrum idk whether I like her that way#my friend is being super nice and helpful#however he doesn’t eben consider the possibility of me not liking her. he wants me to get a girlfriend.#he genuinely wants what he thinks is best for me based on his own experiences but#we’re not the same person#he thought he was aromantic but then he got a girlfriend so he figured he was heterosexual demiromantic#and good for him!#but I’m like also on the auto spectrum like him but I cannot tell the difference between romantic and platonic feelings#he’s trying his best but he doesn’t see not feeling love as a possibility#I wanna cry please I want to know if I actually like this girl and what to do if I don’t#I’m so fucking scared that I’m just overreacting and I’m reading too much into it#maybe I just want to be someone’s favorite person in a platonic way and I can’t distinguish it from romantic feelings#I hate this whole situation
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I SWEAR CELEBI'S THINGY IS COMING SOON BUT I REALLY WANTED TO POST THIS ALRIGHT
yeaah... future trio got me too...
and Darkrai is there too, because of course he is.
hey look i drew a cute Drifloon :D
...ignore the rest
whatever started at Darkrai doodles ended in brainrot of future trio + darkrai and I'm blaming @scribz-ag24 for this
#Can you believe between the first pic and the 4th pic is only a week inbetween. I sure can't but like why did I mirror the pose...#ON ACCIDENT??? Everytime I look at the two Grovyles I'm like... how... how did they end up so differently???#also probably blaming @cozybells as well for this but I really fear tagging people so I'm just letting y'all know in the tags because#I do wanna let everyone know who inspired me when someone did <333 better get running [you know who you are!!!!] DusnoirXDarkrai is next...#also: upon seeing scribz-ag24's art my brain said: You need to color too! ah yeah that went well with the doodle batch#I really hope you're able to read everything with how messy I can write sometimes. If not please let me know and I'll add sth in this post!#Also the doodle batch was the first thing I drew so well... never drew dusknoir before and grovyle once i think...#please go easy on me I have yet to explore the relationship between literally everyone😭 and I have no idea what I‘m doing and I'm a little#lost I normally only draw King Boo or Darkrai but I'm sure scribz-ag24 sprinkling in bits of Darkrai got me in love with the future trio to#grovyle#future trio#celebi#darkrai#dusknoir#pmd hero#pokemon#drifloon#totodile#my art#my stuff#tagas friend spoiler#pmd#pokemon mystery dungeon#IS THERE A SHIP NAME FOR FUTURE TRIO... there must be. ...oh... is it just...#futuretrioshipping#i feel sooo stupid rn.#also everytime i drew darkrai i had evil spiteful bastard in mind (except for the one with an arrow pointing out he's redeemed) but i think#i literally mixed every possible version of him in my head so got absolutely no clue what i'm doing :D#anyways i hope you enjoyed this and thanks for reading through my ramblings! Have such a wonderful rest of the day yippiee <333#pmd2
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fatt pin-up week 2: intimacy
a room & a bed
version from before i started messing with the bg & overlay colors (<- what a pain!!!). i like this one too.
#rosa art#palisade#art#fatt#friends at the table#phrygian#also someone in bed. decide for yourself who...#fatt pinup week#i'm really trying to mostly have fun with these.#messing with colors still takes some time...#which includes spending a reasonable amount of time on it. taking shortcuts. not focusing on details too much#lately I'm really interesting in using different brushes in the same picture to contrast stuff. worked out well here I think#the blanket is from a. weighted blanket website. i sketched over it & then painted the sketch#I can't do folds that well on my own. not yet.#i had a very specific vision for this that's not quite realized.... that's fine though i can try again#i'm not planning to stop drawing phrygian any time soon. + i wanna get better at interiors generally
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Prompt 84
Amity Park absolutely adores her little ghostling, her little Gatekeeper who was of her own ectoplasm, reborn from her own blood in the center of her new heart. She absolutely adores her baby, practically a newborn, being only a year dead!
So of course she had to gush and boast about her little phantom to the other city spirits! They all got together to gossip sometimes after all. And both Smallville and Fawcett started to gush about their own little ones back!
Gosh they should set up a playdate at some point, her little phantom could use some friends in the mortal realm. Well some more friends, three is obviously not enough. Oh, Gotham and Bludhaven have come over as well! It’s a playdate then!
Now if only each of their world’s timelines were synced up, but at least everyone is around the same age!
#dcxdp#dpxdc#City Children Au#Prompts#Each city is from a different timeline lol#Bruce is an angy 16 year old vigilante and was Not prepared to be the oldest#Dick hasn't told them his birthday#and isn't revealing he's older than this Bruce by a few months#Clark is just happy to make friends and he brought pie! his ma and him made it!#Dick is wheezing at these itty bitty versions of Bruce and Clark- this is great and hilarious and oh god he has to protect them#Billy is chanting to do it whenever someone has a Bad Idea- He's just become the Champion of Magic & the gods encourage it#Danny is delighted to have more friends and he's not the oldest Or the youngest so yay!#they're having fun#lots of fun in all their timelines and in the realms too#if they get in trouble they call their city-parents#“Alfred says I'm a polite young man. He also says that if someone tries to grab me to use my teeth”#“Sounds about right” “Mood” “Biting is always good” “But what about diseases??”#“Hey Danny you like alien stuff right- do you think you can help me and the others translate this it came from the ship i was on”#“Omg Billy you should teach us mortal magic and we can teach you are stuff”#Dick: I don't wanna be the responsible one so I'm going to encourage them all to be Worse :)#At some point the squad is going to end up in some other timeline and confuse the fuck out of the JL lol#dick grayson#danny fenton#billy batson#clark kent#bruce wayne
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#trying to figure out how i wanna draw myself when i start my new sketchbook#+ i kinda do wanna learn lineless art bc theres a certain style of it that reminds me of gouache! and i love flat matte gouache#its so hard tho as someone who struggles with contrast. and LOVES lines.#i wish it was as easy as changing the lineart color at the very end of a lined and colored piece ykwim#but the line color i choose when im painting in gouache is different than the colors i choose when coloring already existing lineart#if that makes sense#anyway this was directly inspired by manaohu on twitter ^_^ they are one of my fave artists#a doodley#ok unlocked
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I loveee the concept of reincarnation bc it’s just so comforting!!!
oh to be reincarnated lovers with Bakugou where you find each other every life time and leave a memory of the other to find in the next lifetime. You see each other in a new lifetime, drawn to each other, swearing familiarity even though your minds disagree. But it’s something deeper within you that knows each other, misses the others embrace, and you can’t figure out why.
There’s a famous painting of someone who looks suspiciously like you made in the 1600s by some tortured artist, the muse a lover he had lost years before. There’s a statue that looks just like Bakugou from the 1800s, who everyone thought to be created after Apollo, but you beg to differ. There are letters found between two lovers, one gone off to war and the other at home, their exchange of love something poets discuss in contemporary times. Theres even skeletons found embracing each other, with one’s head tucked into the others neck.
And for some reason, every time, these figments of love appeal to you deeper than anyone else around you. They’re so familiar, and you think you might be going crazy when flashes of memories start to plague you.
Sitting in a darkly lit room, a slate of white marble in front of you, a point chisel in hand. There’s a blond man sitting behind the marble, with a sly grin, as your hands raise to start chipping away at its flawless perfection.
Sitting at home, writing away with a quilled pen to a lover you miss. Kissing the edge of the paper and pulling away to find it stained with red from your lips.
Laying in the soft grass, your face hidden in a strong neck as heavy winds start to take over you. Your arms entangled in another’s, tilting your face up to kiss a blond, stubbled jaw.
When Bakugou tells you he remembers the same things, you wonder if you’re both just on a bad trip from a drug you don’t remember taking. But you carve your names in tree trunks and wonder if you’ll find find it again hundreds of years later, if you’ll see him again, if you’ll create another piece of your unyielding love on every crevice of the earth.
#this was what t*mblr deleted last night -_-#ofc the first idea was better and I couldn’t remember what I said but WHATEVER#anyway I love reincarnation as a concept so much#so so beautiful and comforting#I lowkey wanna make this a full fic and just talk about every lifetime you’ve lived with him#…….ykw fuck it ima put it on my list bc WHY NOT#the semester is over anyway so I can write as much as I want now 😌#okay lemme go brainstorm different lives you live with him 🏃🏽♂️#bakugou treats! 🍬#—new treat in the streets! 🍫#I yam also open to someone suggesting different lives if you wanna !!!!
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(Asking as someone who can't stop cringing at my attempts of smut and will probably never write it)
Also kissing doesn't count as smut. You can argue about it BUT IT'S NOT
Also ALSO I know the answer might depend on the fandom u are reading so let's just answer in general alrighty
Reblog for larger sample size blah blah blah (but like really plz)
#ao3#fanfiction#writing#tumblr polls#feel free to add your opinions in the comments i wanna know#cuz i saw recently someone saying that they feel disapointed if the fic doesn't have smut in the end of a slowburn#and it got me thinkin#because I usually cling onto different things in fics and i do read smut but i never search for it#but now that im trying to write myself im curious how important it is to other people#like I've read some AMAZING fics with no smut in them#and also some amazing ones WITH smut in them#so i dunno
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i... wrote a smol fic (っ´▽`*)っ
also!!!!! If you haven't seen it - shoutout to first ever published fic in Ninja Showdown/My Immortal Soul tags - Lustrous Red by @missadmyre !!!
#ninja showdown#my immortal soul#first ninja x chase young#rc9gn first ninja#first ninja#rc9gn#chase young#xiaolin showdown#randy cunningham 9th grade ninja#rc9gn plop plop#well i say smol fic.... but those 4k words felt very long.#i did say i was going to direct my energy into writing >.> and now look at me ive gone insane#no actually dont look at me im just gonna go cry over my 20k words of rough drafts for like dozen ideas that are now going#to haunt my every waking moment like JESUS i woke up today and literally wrote out 1k words of an idea for a modern au for those two TToTT#its literally an au where its a meet cute turned meet violent and first is randy's sorta dad and chase wants to adopt omi#not to mention a different AU where its an epic mystery adventure AAAAAAA someone heeeelppppp meeeee#also. its been a month but im still staring so intently at missadmyre's fic hoping for another crumb. like thank you sm for the food!!!!#ive literally been rereading it several times after i went insane about it on my main blog and im still slurping at it like a starved perso#Ive been collecting my ideas like a dragon but after reading that fic i was like: I WANT TO READ MORE FICS ABOUT THEM#but i dont wanna be a whiny baby&beg others and be annoying about it. So i put on my big person pants and was like f it WE R WRITINg NOW#so i dont care how bad my writing will be. we gonna be balling on those ideas and YES it doesnt make sense im just v rambly rn
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