#i try not to rant on here as much as i used to
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You all are so pro mental illness until they forget to take their medication.
You all are so pro mental illness until they start having delusions.
You all are so pro mental illness until they develop brain fog.
You all are so pro mental illness until they start forgetting important dates.
You all are so pro mental illness until they identify neuro divergent traits that you have.
You all are so pro mental illness until they start expressing their struggles.
You all are so pro mental illness until someone can't afford to go to therapy.
You all are so pro mental illness until someone can't afford their medication.
You all are so pro mental illness until it's something that comes attached with a physical health condition or deformity.
You all are so pro mental illness until it comes to advocating for better systems.
You all are so pro mental illness until your loved one becomes mentally ill.
You all are so pro mental illness until they need your help.
You all are so pro mental illness until it comes to doing anything other than saying "I'm pro mental illness."
yall are pro mental illness until they hallucinate
yall are pro mental illness until they dissociate
yall are pro mental illness until they self-isolate
yall are pro mental illness until they're paranoid
yall are pro mental illness until they split
yall are pro mental illness until it's too Scary for your comparatively neurotypical brain to handle
#ive been saying this#yall are pro mental illness until....#tw#mental illness#mental health#i feel like the world would be a better place if people just listened more.#did you know that the SUICIDE HOTLINE listed HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE IN THE WAITLIST AHEAD OF YOU for YEARS#and if you dont get WHY thats a stupid feature either you dont have suicidal friends or you dont listen to your suicidal friends#worst yet they STILL rely on you to “rate how youre feeling”#they rely on the SUICIDAL PERSON the DEPRESSED PERSON to SELF REPORT how they are feeling#you know the group that KNOWS THEY CAN BE PUT IN A WARD OR SABOTAGE THEIR SUICIDE PLAN FOR BEING TOO HONEST????#damn sure hope that group doesnt LIE to avoid being a burden or making their life worse than it already is#and the thing that REALLY grinds my gears is that people will have every intervention known to man regarding your mental problems#but then despite YOU being the one who is suffering with whatever mental illness you have#somehow THEY are the real victims because they deal with the EFFECTS of you BEING MENTALLY ILL#Oh im sorry jennifer is annoying that i cant get much done around here?#damn imagine if you had a thousand things you wanted to do but just never had the energy or focus to do them#wouldnt that suck???#you can find ACTUAL friends who are supportive of you and recovering from your mental illness i promise#they just dont label themselves anything other than “trying not to be an asshole”#most of the time the people who are FOR a marginalized group just see it as “being a decent human being” while most posers use labels#rant#and another thing#people are so much better than they used to be i can say that as a retail worker#they can be so patient and kind#but my thing is that no one ever listens#they tell you to “take accountability” but sometimes the thing they ask you to “take accountability” for is daring to make them feel unease#they tell you to “take accountability” and sometimes theyre right#but most of the time they ask you to apologize for existing#they ask you to apologize for not bending over backwards to accomodate THEM when YOU are the one suffering
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How to actually train a submissive, a how to guide
+Thoughts on the pervasive misinformation surrounding punishments and their usefulness.
Step 1. Make sure your submissive actually want to be trained. I'm into dom breaking, I'm into kidnapping, I'm into all types of situations where you forcibly change a person into the perfect submissive. But that's all fantasy, and they're fun fantasies to play out with willing participants. (Yeah i know this is pretty obvious stuff, everyone should know this already, but it is an important first step and it cant hurt to repeat)
Step 2. Pick a goal. The perfect example is getting them to take their pills at the same time each day. Its something they already want to do, its something that will benefit them greatly, its something that's very obviously pass/ fail, and its simple. Those are the criteria for a good behaviour to modify (with "want to do" flipped to "don't want to do" if its a behaviour you're trying to stop). The fewer of those things are true the more difficult its going to be to get the desired result, not impossible mind you but more difficult. As you and your submissive gain experience and become more comfortable with this process you can begin to modify more complex behaviours, but keep it simple to start.
Step 3. DO reward success, DO NOT punish failure. I'm gonna let myself rant about this at the end of this guide but for the moment just believe me when i say punishments are not a useful tool in training. So reward them every time the succeed. The best rewards are small things that stimulate the pleasure centre of their brain. Praise is a great place to start, stickers, snacks, tiny animal erasers, maybe shiny treasures if they have corvid like proclivities. Whatever it is make sure you give it to them personally, make sure you show you're genuinely happy with them, and make sure its something they cant get or aren't allowed to have otherwise. If the do fail (and they will sometimes) don't reward them, don't punish them, and don't let them punish themself. They want to be good for you, they will take failure hard. You need to make sure they know failure isn't a bad thing, everyone fails sometimes especially when starting to learn something. You need to reassure them that you're not angry or sad or upset and especially not disappointed.
Step 4. Be consistent. Reward them every time until they have a perfect record for a significant period of time. The specifics of this depend too much on the specifics of the behaviour and the reward so i wont try to give guidelines. Once they have that perfect track record start reducing the frequency of the rewards, stress to them that this isn't a punishment this is a really good thing. It means the training is working and they should be proud of themself and you are proud of them. Once you've weaned them off of the reward all together give them a big reward as a congratulations. And then sporadically reward them as a reminder that you're proud of them and to keep the habit strong. If the behaviour begins to drift you might need to go back and start rewarding them again, this shouldn't be seen as failure, its a normal part of training.
Step 5. Start again. Do they still want to be trained or are they happy with where they are? Is there another behaviour you want to modify? Is it time to try a more difficult modification? Do you need to switch up the reward to keep them motivated? Do you have the bandwidth to be consistent?
Finally here is the as promised rant about punishment.
A note on brats. Specifically type 3 brats as described in THIS post. None of my advice changes. They still want to be good for you they just also want to play a fun game with you. Enjoy the fun game and train them to improve their lives. Just, don't try to train them out of being a brat, they're enjoying their game don't take away something that they enjoy, if you don't want a brat don't get with a brat.
To the submissive reading this. You don't deserve to be punished, you never deserved to be punished. Even if you were a "problem" child you didn't deserve to be hurt for it. You still don't deserve to be hurt in ways you don't want to be. To the dominant reading this, yes you can rule through fear it is possible, but gods why?! If your ultimate goal isn't for your sub to be as happy and self fulfilled as possible, whatever that looks like for them, then what the fuck are you doing. And aside from that punishment isn't even an effective method of training. A dog kicked whenever it barks will learn to fear you and wont bark around you. A child spanked whenever you feel they've done something wrong will learn to resent you and will hide everything from you. An adult punished for stealing will learn to steal more effectively. Your submissive is no different from any of those examples. Kill the cop in your head, stop thinking of punishment as a legitimate means of control.
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°•*⁀➷ Introduction °•*⁀➷
TRIGGERING BLOG: BLOCK DONT REPORT
cws for my blog: ed, weed, alcohol, and nicotine use, occasional sh and suicidal thoughts/talks about attempts, occasional mentions of abuse/trauma, religious trauma, pet/family death, medicine misuse, and overdoses
please tag any posts about christianity/god with "tw christianity" and any sh posts with either "tw sh" or "tw sh implied"
links proof-checked by my awesome moot @/atlasisneverenoughx
°•*⁀➷ About Me °•*⁀➷
Name: Vivian
Age: 16 (17 next month) im ok with adults interacting just don't be weird yk? id prefer followers/moots aged 15-22 but i'm ok with people older or younger following, i just may not interact as much (unless were already moots)
Gender/Pronouns/Sexuality: im gender apathetic/non-binary, i could care less about my gender or how i'm perceived. i use all pronouns but when asked i just say they/them or they/xem if we're close. (moots are allowed to use xey/xem for me freely btw and i encourage it!! :3) i'm aroace and pan (more specifically i rarely get crushes on people but still find some people attractive regardless of gender and i'm a sex repulsed asexual)
Diagnoses: depression, anxiety, and derealization (depersonalization is not diagnosed however im aware i deal with it and need to bring it up next session) my therapist is trying to diagnose me with ptsd and my mom wants me to get diagnosed with anorexia
Be Aware: i don't censor most things but i will tag everything i post according to what's mentioned. Another thing; i block freely and often so i apologize if you end up blocked
DNI: basic dni stuff (racist, homophobic, sexist, etc) generally bad people, NSFW/18+ blogs, anyone under 13 and men over 23 (unless we're already moots)
Blog stuff, stats/goals, and personal tag guide below cut
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Don't send me asks saying that i need to recover, im aware but saying that means and does nothing for me, it just makes me more motivated because someone's worried about me
If i reblog something that has misinformation or something that's accidentally offensive, pleaseee let me know so i can take it down, i don't always double check like i should
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°•*⁀➷•* Stats °•*⁀➷•*
Height: 166cm
HW/SW: 136.6lbs
HBMI/SBMI: 25
LW: 98.6lbs
LBMI: 16.2
CW: ~113lbs
CBMI: 18.6
UGW: 90lbs
UGBMI: 15
°•*⁀➷•* Goals °•*⁀➷•*
GW1: 110lbs
GW2: 105lbs
GW3: 100lbs
GW4: 95lbs
UGW: 90lbs
°•*⁀➷ Tag Guide °•*⁀➷
There's a lot and most are self explanatory but in case you were wondering here's all of them :3
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#gvtz eats- wieiad
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#gvtz is productive??- talking about things/chores i did, planning my day
#gvtz#gvtz life#gvtz rants#gvtz vents#gvtz rambles#gvtz eats#gvtz cooks#gvtz works out#gvtz asks#gvtz moots#gvtz will eat#gvtz 👙#gvtz 🍽️#gvtz diets#gvtz 🤢#gvtz music#gvtz wants to eat :((#gvtz advice#gvtz is unstable#gvtz is productive??#ed but not ed sheeran#tw ana bløg#pro for ana#tw ed ana#ana loves you#tw ana mia#ana y mia#tw ed implied#tw ana rant#tw ed disorder
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I've been Isekaied into Paulina's Novel?!
Welcome to the fic for the EctoImposion 2024 event! I was paired with @thebooo-merang for this wonderful fic, and you should go check them out! And check out the ao3 posting HERE
After an incident with Box Ghost solicits a fight with Ghost Writer, Ghost Writers out for revenge. And Paulina has a convenient little fanfiction that Ghost writer could use. Now Danny just has to survive it, with a starstruck Paulina in tow.
The first chapter doesn't especially need warnings, as everything remains cannon typical. It's under the cut!
~
"Get back here!" Danny shouted, ready to be done with wit for today.
"I, THE BOOOX GHOOOST, WILL-"
"Piss off Ghost Writer!" Do you just break into random lairs in search of weird boxes!?" Danny screeched, trying to dive after a flying notebook.
"I, THE BOX GHOST, WILL-" Box shouted over Danny, waving wildly as he went and sending even more boxes and books flying back and forth.
"RUIN WHAT LITTLE TRUCE I'VE GOT GOING WITH HIM!" Danny cut back, struggling to grab books mid-air with one arm and blast Boxy into submission with the other.
"THE BOX GHOST HAS NO NEED FOR LECTURES ON YOUR INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS! PREPARE TO BE DESTROYED!"
Danny was gonna kill him this time!
~
Boxes and books rained over the town, causing havoc and mild property damage to the unprepared. Paulina could only huff and puff as she bolted across the open street from shop to shop, trying to find somewhere to camp out while Phantom dealt with the box menace, trying to keep an eye out for whatever storefront Star had managed to find for herself.
Another keeper kept their shoulder into the door as she pushed, and bitterly she cursed them out. She probably didn't get any sympathetic glances through the wood door, but whatever! Rude ass motherfuckers locking out innocents while there was an attack!
It was tempting to keep under the eave, but beyond being mere cloth too much was getting tossed around- plenty enough room for something to slam in sideways and get her then!
God! One good day is all she wanted right now.
Though a few more after wouldn't go amiss...
There! The geek shit shop was probably going to let her in! Maybe!
She didn't care, actually, she'd punch through the glass if she had to! Take that, losers!
First, she needed the mental psyche up to dart across the road again. Three, two, one, go!
The owner, or possible customer, waved behind the glass as she ran.The door opened and closed near instantaneously on her entry.
The sound of Phantom yelling at The Box Ghost dampened as the bell rang, and the store owner gave her an uneasy smile and gestured towards the windowless back.
“Everyone’s in the back. Might be cramped by now, but there’s a lot of shelves to sit behind.” He nervously informed, eyeing the glass windows.
The casual thumbs up sent him away as she bent slightly to wheeze out the adrenaline.
Yeah, cheer takes some stamina, but adrenaline really messes up her rhythm!
Breath caught, it was time to pack in with the other unlucky idiots back here. With care and precision she marched over behind the popular shelf, examined the bodies packed like sardines, and picked a new shelf to hide behind.
This one was packed with books instead of weird anime figures and dungeons and dragons minis, the spines a cold comfort as she sat down and started staring.
The titles on this sort of crap were so weird…
But she supposed Star seemed to enjoy them, Star's rants echoing clearly in her head.
She wouldn’t admit it with a gun to her head, but after enough of those rants… she may or may not be able to pick out a few of the series on display.
Sue her, she's a sucker for some of the romances even if they were trashy a lot of the time. And Star's collection at this rate was pretty impressive, to the point Paulina was convinced she was the only reason a store like this could keep afloat in a town like Amity.
The other nerd shit probably helped it keep alive, though. More screaming outside, this time sounding like it was from The Box Ghost in rage. Good. Phantom could pummel that no good fool to goo for what it mattered.
... Ugh. The fight could easily take a long time; Box Ghost might be weak, but he clearly had a lot of material to use this time. But whatever. Here she is in a castle of weeb books. Maybe some could be a good distraction.
~
"No! Not you!"
"Yes, me! Did you think you could trash my library and get away with it!?" Ghost Writer roared, trying to come up from behind.
"It wasn't me, it was-"
But Box Ghost was already gone, the leftover boxes of books now floating to the ground in a suspiciously gentle manner.
Coward. The thought wouldn't leave as Danny shifted the books he'd been trying to save around, awkwardly offering the armful to Ghost Writer.
Ghost Writer loomed ominously.
~
All at once the outside world went quiet, some shouting occasionally coming close enough to hear, and everyone breathed a sigh of relief loud enough to drag Paulina from her pile of books.
Five more minutes would've been great to finish the book she'd had in hand, not that it mattered...
Now she needed to find where Star ran off to without her, the books carefully left behind in a pile.
Phantom and a ghost she couldn’t recognize quipped back and forth, the day still significantly quieter than it had been fifteen minutes before. The area remained strewn with books, the ghost gesturing to some on a roof.
Now, she could walk around the district lost and confused looking for Star... Or just sit back down on a nice ledge and wait for Star to come to her while watching Phantom.
Phantom made an odd twist in the air as he shouted, still a little too distant to make out properly.
Yeah, watching sounded so much safer and calmer. One hop later and she was perched on top of one of the lower walls purporting to be defensive.
Fat lot of good they did...
Phantom and his assailant came closer, lending her a nice view of what was going on.
Maybe she shouldn't be here, but it seemed to be more arguing than fighting, so whatever.
"While I'm sorry my NOT PARTNER didn't have a spine, you can have yours back!" Phantom shouted as they passed overhead, throwing a book at the weird ghost.
She had to huff out a clipped laugh as the ghost was whacked, even as the ghost elected to bolt as it realized its inferiority.
She could just hear the stunned silence from Phantom, right before he cried out "Get back here!"
Truly, a foolish thing to think it could stand up to the town hero.
With a certain lack of ceremony, the book the from the fight fell onto her
"Ouch!" She yelped, one hand raising to rub her scalp as the other fumbled for the offending book.
The whole thing might be a sign it's time to get up and go. Still...
"Raining books is a new one." She muttered, far too late for the comment to be witty but all the same a perfectly serious remark on the latest weird shit Amity came up with.
She cautiously eyed the book in her hands, looking for any oddities. You could never quite trust some of this stuff...
It was just a notebook. Nothing special about it, besides being a trophy for today. The decoration and signature on front was incomprehensible to her, an initial she didn't recognize against the slightly plain front.
Caving to curiosity, the book opened easily. Not that she’d expected anything else.
It revealed... nothing. Nothing at all. None of the pages had any sort of writing in them.
Well she can't be begrudged for snooping- it's her prize right now. An apology for getting assaulted in broad daylight. This G-W could just deal with it, and the spat was already away from her, so it's not like she was going to be in more danger sitting here.
The blank notebook continued to be uninteresting, and she couldn’t help her annoyance as she shut it. There wasn’t a damn thing to pay her back for getting hit.
Or... well...
She could feel her lip work up into a slight smirk.
I have been wanting to write a new Phantom fic...
The thought was clear as day to her, even as she couldn't wait for the night. What better way to celebrate this particular trophy?
~
Ghost Writer was forced to watch on in abject misery as he realized his collection had been tossed around like a toddler’s toys. No respect whatsoever from the box obsessed lunatic for the actual contents of the boxes.
The nerve! The audacity! To treat his writing like this! The ghost may well need a lesson in manners.
But first, Phantom.
Sure, the boy wasn't the sole force at work- but undeniably the lunatic never would've gotten close to his manuscripts if Phantom hadn't been snooping around in his library.
But don't think he's lost the plot of getting his own books tossed at him! The tactical retreat was nothing more than an admission of lack of home turf!
Nothing to do with not having his typewriter or any notebooks activated!
Ahem... So the child would need an appropriate punishment as well.
Sometime after he collected his books
The whole lot of them, all across town! Lunatics.
It was easy enough to threaten people away from his scripts, but nonetheless annoying and time consuming. Go here, show up there, yell to get their grubby mitts off his stuff.
Ugh.
The annoyance was the cost of getting everything back. though. He pointedly ignored Phantom’s continued patrolling, likely looking for whatever trap Ghost Writer would end up creating.
Easy enough to stay low and out of sight in the meantime. Whatever he was about to do, it wasn't a ‘now’ plan. Such things take planning, and unfortunately it's not the season to stick the boy back into Christmas stories.
So he was collecting his books, and chasing fools away from them. The cost of love, he supposed.
Still, he was being forced to waste hours upon hours taking his books out of the hands of fools. Having such a collection was not currently a point of pride; He’d have to figure out what went where later.
Slowly but surely his boxes filled back up as he found his manuscripts. There was his old horror story from the eighties, there was his attempt at something akin to a superhero comic, there was his dabbling in... well he couldn't remember either, but if he sat to read it right now it'd take hours for him to finish the book. No reading for him.
Finally, it was time to find his blank notebooks again. He'd be forced to admit that he simply cared less if these ones vanished mysteriously, for a blank notebook was nothing more or less than a possibility.
Most were alright, scattered down the streets carelessly. Some had been picked up and put back down to be examined by wretched hands at a later date.
There was an exception though, something swaying as if held at the edge of where he could feel things. Curious, for how late at night it was getting, but that'd just mean he needed to scare another pathetic mortal off his books.
The pull and search brought him to a cracked window in the suburbs. Nothing meaningful crossed his path, though it was good to be wary; The boy was likely still patrolling, and no doubt Ghost Writer's appearance had put him on edge. As it should.
Slowly rising up to look through, invisible to the mortal eye, he could hear a girl rambling slightly.
His look through the window was enlightening, the girl curled onto her bed as she wrote with ink that even from this distance sparkled with glitter.
"And then Princess Paulina lived happily ever after with Prince Phantom, aaannd the end." She whispered, pleased with herself.
Barely pausing, she snapped the book shut and laid it on her nightstand, moving to stand and stretch.
Shouting called her away, which was plenty convenient for him even as she huffed and puffed out of the room.
It was child's play to take the notebook back, even with it defiled by mortal hands. It wasn't a toy to be left with creatures that didn't understand what could be done with such tools.
The cover had already been decorated with a couple of stickers and a flowing cursive he couldn't bother deciphering at this second.
Phasing back out of the room and coming to rest back outside of the window, he flipped the cover open. The inside was decorated similarly.
Oh, yes. That was glitter pen. The pages were coming away bedazzled with runaway glitter.
This book was most certainly going to have to be put in its own container, but for right this second the name on the inside was of modest curiosity.
Paulina Sanchez in bold strokes, fancy flourishes forgone in favor of legibility. If found, return to owner, do not read.
Well now he just had to, didn't he? It wasn't like the rest of the books were going anywhere, the grand total of three he still had to find now could rest safely.
Or well... No, he could spare the time now> What would the boy do, if it blows up on them both? The books shouldn't even be in the town anyways, and it was most certainly his fault thank you very much!
He quickly leafed through the beginning burning through thanks to his superior-ness and a speed reading class he'd attended before.
... hmm.
Hmmmmm.
He'd recently been complaining about what to do with the boy, no?
"This could work." He spoke to no-one, clapping the book shut. For now.
~
Barely past sunrise, Danny squinted at the sky and grumbled. Damn malicious blob ghosts, eating billboards.
Not that he cares about the billboards, but first it's a billboard and then it's drywall.
"Catch!" Got shouted, an object (presumably) sailing from behind him.
Snapping too and turning, he could see Ghost Writer grin manically in glee as a book opened wide.
All he could do was choke out an "eh?" as he reflexively reached, the book splayed open and glowing. Illustory pages floated up and off, and he had a really bad feeling about what was coming next as the world around him went white.
~
Coming to under Ghost Writers writing was not a fun thing to experience, see. One did not simply fade into one of his chaotic and weirdly random worlds. You blink and then suddenly you're just there!
Danny was there, wherever there was. Somewhere was currently a bright grass field, with a decorated horse beside him.
Which he would grant was a better entrance than the last time he'd been flung into one of Ghost Writer's many insane stories.
He would never forget that anglerfish...
But almost just as fast as he got here there was another stupidly bright light, and someone was falling into his arms, briefly bundled into his chest before quickly popping back up to look at him.His tongue was stuck in a way that implied Ghost Writer had ideas about what he should or shouldn't be saying at this time, but that didn't stop the extremely strained noise he gave when he realized the person was Paulina, looking VERY enthused.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#paulina sanchez#ghost writer (danny phantom)#fanfiction#long#ectoimplosion2024#isekai#transported into another world
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I just had a thought about ZoSopp that I can't get out of my head
Before Water 7, we got Zoro drinking from Usopp's thermos and giving him affectionate head bonks, and maybe other stuff I can't remember right now
After Water 7 and the timeskip, we get barely anything. It's the Sahara Desert for us parched ZoSopp fans. We still get ZoSopp moments when Usopp clings onto Zoro etc. but Zoro just tolerates him at best? He never initiates anything with Usopp anymore and I'm losing braincells (and currently, sleep) over why that might be. These could be the reasons why Zoro isn't as affectionate anymore:
1. Maybe Water 7 did affect Zoro and Usopp's relationship
2. The writers of the show practically ship ZoSan (maybe they also realised that ZoSan's really popular amongst fans) and that's why they promote ZoSan a lot post-timeskip. (I'm not trying to attack ZoSan here btw, just saying that the show's focusing a lot on ZoSan, some SanLu during WCI, maybe a little ZoLu, but we don't really see SanUso and ZoSopp much anymore — maybe...maybe Usopp's not as marketable as the Monster Trio (TT^TT)
3. Post-timeskip Zoro isn't as carefree as pre-timeskip Zoro. The mf doesn't smile, laugh, and joke around like he used to, poor boy (I'm begging the show's writers...please bring back Zoro and his goofy ass Tarzan shout from the Skypiea arc)
The more I think about it, the more I'm convinced that it's Reason 2 and 3 being why Zoro doesn't do anything with Usopp anymore. The man's not the type to hold grudges. But yeah that's it for my rant, if you made it this far, thanks for entertaining my bullshit and I love you
they don't make this kind of thing anymore 😔
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I am listening! I am invested! Please yap about your au idea!!
AHHHHHHHHHIIWJHDIEHDIANRRUFIFBFIEBF HFHDB I GET TO YAP ABOUT THIS YAYYYYYY
ok so, I honestly don’t have much of an idea as to where exactly this would go, but just for the basics (which I’m mostly coming up with on the fly, I’ll be honest) here we go:
(this ended up being quite long so everything else is under the break, sorry!)
obviously, ford and bill were not always… separated, as it were. growing up and into his teens and early twenties it was just stanford pines, no “alter egos” or masks or anything of the sort (much as he would’ve loved to be able to hide who he was).
then, when he moved up to gravity falls and began his research, he began to realize that there were so many things that he wanted to do, couldn’t do, because of his reputation. he needed to keep his record clean because if he didn’t, he could easily have his grant money revoked, and any future opportunities in the pursuit of science dashed due to one small slip up. so, he began to look into, well, changing who he was, splitting himself, so to speak, as to be not one but two at the same time.
eventually, it worked somehow (probably through a potion, as jekyll uses in the original book), and he found himself as not just one, but seemingly two people in one body. there was the stanford pines most people knew, the eccentric, odd mad scientist that lived in the woods at the edge of town, and then there was another, completely new facade. bill cipher, named for his often frustratingly vague double speak and extreme use of overly complicated metaphors (yes I’m giving bill’s name a reason, it sort of annoys me that theres no reasoning for hyde’s name in the book but thats a rant for another day).
to begin with, bill seems content with simply switching back and forth at ford’s will, being the way for ford to kick back and let loose with no fear of the repercussions. at least, until ford begins to have trouble getting back to himself. thats when he begins to doubt the true intent of his other self, of bill. its around this time he calls fiddleford. the man may have studied engineering, but in this world he also knows a little something about psychology, and paired with his brilliant mind, ford’s very precise notes of the situation (ahem the journals ahem), and the fact that hes basically ford’s only friend, it felt like the best course of action.
of course, in actual gravity falls, ford does his best to hide bill from fidds but here bill is exactly why ford called him. anyone else would’ve called him crazy, tried to experiment on him or worse, but fiddeford would never do any of that and ford knows it (just to be clear, I do think that if I ever wrote anything for this au college fiddauthor would be heavily implied here).
fidds does his best to help but when bill goes on a rampage one night, going so far as to kill the heir to the northwest family, preston northwest, he knows ford is beyond fucked (just a heads up, the person bill kills being preston may change but idk, we’ll see if I ever actually come back to this au haha). the reason fiddleford originally makes the memory gun in this au isnt for himself, its actually to try and erase the memories of what bill has down from the townspeople’s minds. the only problem is that the next time they see bill all of the memories return and everyone is back at square one. its just too much for fidds, and he begins to turn the memory gun on himself in an attempt to get rid of the fear, pain, failure, and regret that helping his friend brought him.
ford on the hand is mortified by what hes done. I highly doubt that there would be a confrontation type scene, it would be closer to how the book goes, where ford quickly begins to be unable to switch between stanford pines and bill cipher. the au would probably “end” (as in if I turned this into a fanfic/comic/whatever the story would end there) with ford figuring out where stan is, calling and begging him to come up to gravity falls and help him, before ultimately turning the memory gun on himself and ridding himself of “bill” once and for all.
the only problem is that in order to remove bill, he has to remove stanford pines and all that he is as well. now, we all know how this goes in both the show and most aus; stan or ford or whoever it is that is possessed by bill erases themselves/has someone erase them, is weirdly blank for a bit but ultimately regains their memories. well here it… wouldnt work like that. bill(/hyde) is an integral part of ford(/jekyll), to remove bill(hyde) is to remove stanford pines (jekyll), theres no way around that. so, ford sort of ends up in that “blank slate” state for the rest of his life. he called stan prior to erasing himself because he knew stan would take care of him no matter what, and he was right. for the rest of their lives, stan takes care of his brother to the best of his abilities, and while they never get to sail the seas together, and some nights bring unimaginable sorrow for stan, knowing he’ll never speak to his brother again, despite the fact that very man sleeps just a few doors down the hall, they make it work. ford (or, well, whats left behind when you remove everything that makes a person who they are) sees that his blankness hurt stan but he cant do anything about it, and to begin with almost avoids stan, at least before they finally have a talk in which stan reassures “ford” that he’s sure whatever reason ford may have had for erasing himself, it was worth it.
as for fidds, well it mostly works out in a similar way to canon, he does eventually regain most memories but of course some bits are still fuzzy. the fuzzy bits are never fully recovered, as the one person who may have been able to fill in the blanks no longer exists, but fidds is still mostly alright.
the journals… sort of exist? but not in the way that they do in the show, and what does exist stan had from the very beginning. ofc the twins still have to deal with monsters and spooks and whatnot in gravity falls, just not anything that has to do with bill (which means that, of course, weirdmageddon physically cannot happen). at some point, dipper begins to insinuate that the weirdness of gravity falls might have something to do with “ford’s”… situation, which is when stan finally fully comes clean with all he knows about the situation. its not until fiddleford begins to regain his memory, however, that any of them learn the truth of what was going on.
oh yikes, I wrote a lot more for this than I meant to, whoops!
oh yeah, I’m naming this au the “Dr. Pines/Mr. Cipher” au for now, but if anyone has any better ideas or if thats already been used for something else, please let me know!
also, @aaabatteryy I LOVE MARINEFLAMES’ CONFRONTATION ANIMATIC, THAT WAS ACTUALLY WHAT I WAS REFERENCING WHEN I MENTIONED OTHER ANIMATIONS USING A SIMILAR CONCEPT TO THIS AU
oh, and I just want to say that I’ve never watched the musical so thats why this doesnt (intentionally) incorporate any elements of that.
#gravity falls#jekyll and hyde#the strange case of dr jekyll and mr hyde#gravity falls au#stanford pines#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#stanley pines#henry jekyll#edward hyde#Dr. Pines/Mr. Cipher au#also sorry I’m not very good at formatting on here so the break is a little wonky#mb chat#also also#I started reading the glass scientists!#and OH MY GOD THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED TO FUEL THE JEKYLL AND HYDE HYPERFIXATION#AHAIDHIEFHJEFIRNFVEHIDBD
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if theres one thing that instantly sours my mood, its an acquaintance sending me a 2 minute whatsapp voice message where they ramble, while mumbling, with the tv blaring in the background. and then i have to fight for my life trying to parse what they even want from me, answer, only to to get another voice message in reply. whoever came up with these voice messages fuck you fuck you fuck you i hate you
#i get its accessibility but everyone that ever sends me those is very much able to use their fingers and eyes#its just the basic lack of respect for my time and ears#like yep i wont send a message that can be read within seconds ill meander around the point im trying to make for several minutes#condense your thoughts man i know you can do it#worst is when its extra long and they expect me to answer several question within a 5+min rant. like do you want me to take notes while i#listen like what are we doing here#and like. i can tolerate it from my mother because she does it rarely. but this person EXCLUSIVELY communicates via these#anyway. ok. im not as mad as i may sound i just needed this out#nebu talks
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“ADA Dazai” this, “PM Dazai” that
Shut up
We are never gonna see Bar Lupin Dazai again😔
#osamu dazai#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bar lupin#buraiha trio#“isn’t that the same as mafia dazai” NO it’s not it’s the one time he was happy and genuinely himself#bring him back to me#technically this isn’t true asagiri could show us more flashbacks but shhhhh#oda sakunosuke#ango sakaguchi#i’ve realized i’m way too negative on this blog with the complaining and ranting#and the reason i started making fan accounts in the first place was to spread positivity#complaining drags my mood down so i’m gonna try to focus more on the things i enjoy instead#so if you see an increase in my dazaiposting that’s why#my bsd hyperfixation may be gone but few fandom things bring me as much joy as dazai so here we are
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Jay not being able to make up his mind on whether he wants Alex to be nice to him or whether he wants to antagonize him into hitting him hard, is making this chapter and absolute rollercoaster to write.
#Everyone's getting whiplash here. me. Jay. Alex. None of us know what Jay's gonna do next. and whatever it is god knows its a shit decision#I swear. Jay sits there and goes “ill be good to get this over with and get the aftercare quicker” and then he's like “no no im gonna do#do whatever it is Alex told me NOT to do so that he'll use me like a human punching bag" and he keeps fucking flipping from one to#the other. like BRO make up your mind. And also please talk to Alex??? He's trying to be nice. like YOU wanted. but you don't know how to#actually deal with that so you just keep antagonizing him to make him go back to being mean to you. AND THEN THAT MAKES JAY FEEL BAD#toxic jaylex#fucking dumbasses. stupid fucking moron bitches i hate them so much go to fucking therapy you stupid fucks#i feel like the jurgen leitner rant about them. “Jaylex? Stupid idiot mother fucking Jaylex? Goddamn fools---” and so on and so forth#mildly nsft#marble hornets#jay merrick#alex kralie#marble hornets fanfic#jaylex#mh sorry its locked
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Lately I've only been wishing to grab a comic about my favorite character and just have a genuinely good time reading it.
#I can't remember the last time I took a Deadpool comic and genuinely had a good time about it#I hate the direction they took with his character and it's so disrespectful that I don't even talk about I don't even think *any* Deadpool#fan genuinely talk about it because were so tired of his kids characterization we all just collectively decided to ignore whatever hell#marvel through at him#but rant aside#it's just–#I am not sure if comic books are fun anymore I don't even know who I am making content for half of the people on my notes haven't touched#comic book and aren't pretending to do so#people who read the comics tend to be so mean or bitter about it that even if you follow most will be angry about something#comic or fan related and I don't know if I can blame them but following that is draining#and as much as I was trying to be a good sport about it you make a post about comic book characters and#and the overwhelming response is 'I don't read the comics but'– following up by a take about them that doesn't even recognize any core#aspect of their personality that you can't even grasp you can't even recognize them#you can't recognize them on tue cannon you can't recognize them on the fannon#and no matter how engaging you try to make content about the fandom people just–*refuse* to read it. And then– they *refuse* to tag fannon#content as fannon#and *refuse* to leave either#Yes we are all having fun but how can a character tag be so so filled with people who have no idea of who they are#how can a character can be properly loved and take care of and have content that respect them if no one makes any attempt to *know them*#and it's disheartening because *comics* are supposed to be fun *fannon are supposed to be fun*#but for aome reason it's really *really* hard to have fun here anymore#I created this page to share my love for the characters I care about and see more content of people who care about them too#but I can't even *find* people who care about them any more and when I do they're all so angry and upset– And I *cant even blame them*#I just... I don't know why I am doing this anymore or for who I am doing this anymore#sorry to vent but it's been a while since I haven't been had a genuinely good time™ enjoying comics#I don't think even people who write those comics enjoy those comics or care about those characters#Sometimes feels like everyone is projecting on those characters rather than *writing about them*. And I can't find them anymore#fanfics used to be about love petters to characters who you love#nowadays seems like a competition to see who makes more funny words with tropes pre-written since 2007#vent
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Small rant:
One of the most frustrating things about being transmasc is the infantilization. I'm below 25yrs of age, and pre-everything. Everyone older than me talks down to me, half my peers do as well, I'm kind of tall but even so, everyone who's said something about it has said I'm like a kid or younger sibling to them. 90% of appearance compliments are that I'm "cute" even from all the folk that genuinely support me as trans. I'm everyone's sweet baby boy and tbh I'm sick of it. It's not that I think I'm big and scary, or super super charismatic, I'm just a guy and I want to be treated like one. It makes it hard to want to show my (very copious) delight and affection towards the world when it's met with an example of equivellent of "awww you have such a cute button nose!!"
#i'm going to bite someone if this goes on much longer#it's exhausting#I'm trying to have confidence here#it doesn't help that most of the people that call me cute also disregard me as an adult#goddamn babyface#rant#rant post#transmasc#trans man#transgender#🌇#🌑#virgil appears briefly#idk why I'm so angry about this suddenly but it's been true for a long ass time#trying to sleep and suddenly taken with wrath#oh I remember now#i was thinking about skincare#i really need to start using a moisturiser for my face but I'vr hesitated for a long time#because I didn't want good skin to make me look even *more* femenine#screaming
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every time i see someone claim the ancients were a magical indigenous utopia to aspire to (with 'a few little problems'), and any criticism of them as a society is apologia for native genocide, i clutch my head in agony. never change, twitter
#FF tag#ffxivtag#racism cw#anti-indigenous racism cw#there's just. there's so much. there's So Much#there's so much here that is just utterly balls out offensive in just. every direction and is in fact! incredibly anti-indigenous!#every time i start trying to summarize even one of them it turns into a massive tag rant!#tl;dr of about half of it is that if they *were* meant to be interpreted as indigenous; in the sense that it is applied to irl cultures#that's not heartwarming poignant representation; or even a depiction the narrative should be criticized for drawing its conclusions about#that's 'hey what the fuck are these parameters you've built into this world/magic system/society/etc re: the victims'#'the premise this setup is based on is already fucked; no matter what statement you have to make about it'#spoiler alert: 'indigenous genocide victims did it to themselves with no outside involvement'#and 'indigenous people want to reclaim land; culture; and government from colonizers by violently wiping out Our Way of Life'#'and that is in fact the *only* way for them to do so. it's flat out impossible for things to go otherwise. it's us or them'#would be INCREDIBLY offensive tropes even before you get into everything else being implied by this metaphor#which again there is SO MUCH don't get me started. i keep having to restrain myself because i know there is not enough room in the tags#but oh my god. anyway i keep getting jumpscared by this take on other sites and i phase out of my body every time#It's Bad#the salt files#the crit files#warning: worm grass
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😀!!!!
#sorry i need to rant on here i’m going crazy aaaaaaaaaaaa#i’m moving to another city in october and i’ve been trying to figure out everything#bc im going from an apartment that i share with friends and a pretty decent room#to a very little room shared with people i don’t know#(well actually one of my best friends + someone i don’t know)#but figuring out what to do with every single one of my things is driving me crazy!!!#i’m trying to sell everything i don’t use anymore#and i’ve donated A TON of old clothes that i haven’t even thought about in years#i thought about hiring movers but i think is going to be too expensive for the amount of stuff i’m moving#cause it’s not that much#if i had a god damn drivers license i could just rent a car and move everything myself#BUT I CANT DRIVE#i’m gonna try to convince my friend to drive me there and i’ll pay for all the expenses#but idk if she’s gonna say yes so i’m AAAAA#anyways thank you and good nite
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have you ever written any analysis of anything ii? would love to see it :-] especially any regarding fan's relationships to other characters
idk if it counts but i did write the personality section for fan on his wiki :D
I dont have any clear written analysis of anything except how fan would react upon meeting bot but I think a lot about many of his relationships and how he works but nothing specific I can think of rn but I would consider myself to know him Very Well to a point I Could probably write an analysis on him but I'm Not the best at it <- guy who is terrified of how it'll be received by the public
(iii neg in the tags oops)
#pankie ask#if anyone is interested in the fan and bot thing i could post it again <- guy about to rant in the tags#i kind of immediately deleted it because i got terrified of how people would perceive it since it goes into iii neg and criticism territory#in summary it's about how he'd have trouble with it and probably freak out and get reminded of egg (which I illustrated like a while ago)#and id be very disapointed if fan blindly accepts bot when they meet since it'd kind of disregard his entire struggle and it feels like tha#would be more in favour of fanservice for the whole family thing they're trying to push which wouldn't make sense for fans character#he only took care of egg because he could project onto it and use it to potray himself and his thoughts he wasn't even that good at it#i dont get how he could be able to take care of bot and plus test tube wasn't even the one who cared for egg as much as he did#so her taking care of bot is more of her just doing it because she has to be a parental figure#which doesnt make sense to me when bot can fully function without test tube since they're an adult who has shown to be more mature than her#and i pray to god bot doesnt stick to fan and test tube and interact with cabby goo floory or mephone more in the finale#I DIDNT MEAN TO RANT HERE BUT BASICALLY fan wouldnt be able to handle bot because bot is the embodiment of change and fan sucks at adapting
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according to my dad it just has ' slow driving disease' which basically means I drive too slow sometimes and so now it doesn't work? I wish I could say he was just being a dick but apparently its a real thing :)
Haha my car has stopped working at ever stop light and stop sign today :)
#also he said he was ' getting tired of me' and was gonna start charging me $200 a month#for?? idfk#for groceries and shit#i can buy my own groceries if i need to dude#also for like car insurance#even though i drive around my siblings all the time for free#and i would pay the car insurabce if i fucking knee how#my parents like to act like Im this huge burden#even though they BEGGED me not to move oit#and then literlly offered me a room#WHICH THEY DIDNT EVEN HAVE#did yall know i slept on my parents couch for about 6 months#haha#yeah#0 privacy#i also worked for my dad for 2-3 of those months#it was v hard manual labor#im the incapable one cause idk how to do anything#i litetarally was never taught#also my dsd told me he was getting tired of me for using MY plate when everyone else was usung paper ones#god forbid i want one thing to be good today#how dare i want a shred of happiness after the fuckinf shit day ive had#ha#anyway sorry#if you rrad this far im sorry#i try not to rant on here as much as i used to#which is helping me mask better#a necessity for living with my parents apparrntly#ANYWAY#dont respond to this im just yelling
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eating this moment for breakfast lunch and dinner btw
#bsd reread#small(?) rant incoming that i'm hiding in the tags out of fear#this page is why i can never understand the 'd.azai doesn't actually care about saving s.igma he's just lying to use him' interpretation#bc if that's the case these panels make literally no sense 😭 it would be in his best interest to not act withdrawn here#+ on that topic idk why it's impossible for him to want to save s.igma and make use of his ability simultaneously#especially since this is the same guy who saved a.tsushi in order to form the new s.kk. and nobody sees that as malicious at all#i think ppl just hate s.igma and twist themselves into pretzels trying to villainize the way d.azai treats him#even if it's the same way that they previously excused or justified him treating other characters. sigh#anyway it's a shame that discourse swamped this arc i rlly love it. it tells so much abt d.azai in a way not well seen outside the novels#i always read this part as one of his 'i can't accept that i'm a person capable of doing good' moments#he's just a little creature.... shutting down when confronted with his own kindness......
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