#i think this is an important part of why drarry works and even more in a post war context

[cl0wnstuff]

i love when they dont make draco instantly a good person or a morally correct person yk, because the mischaracterising that would be is wild.

i really like when they don’t gaslight us with that, and give draco his past as an annoying and not-good kid that was following his parents actions and what he was taught. because yes, he wasn’t a good person, but i really think that if you have been taught to be like that all you life, it’s complicated to see that youre doing wrong.

AND THATS WHAT I LIKE, when draco has this debate with himself about what he was taught and the cruel reality of things. he foes through this and at the end of the day he realises that he did really really wrong.

and i think theres a huge difference between making him instantly good and a not-regretting-anything-or-feeling-that-much-guilt person, and making him go through this process of reasoning about what he has done and he DECIDING VOLUNTARILY to change that. and past cant be changed but the guilt he feels after realising all that, and changing those ideas in him is the important part of his redemption arc.

i really like reading this process on draco.

[iamnmbr3]

Hello, hope it’s okay to ask about more than one number for the headcanon ask: Draco – 12, 18, 29

Totally fine!

-12- skills and abilities

Oooh! Time for me to talk about one of my pet peeves. For this one I'm going to say Charms and Transfiguration. Could this question be interpreted more broadly to go beyond school subjects? Absolutely. But then I wouldn't get to rant about my pet peeve. See, it's really popular in fandom to treat it as a given that Potions is Draco's best subject.

And to each their own. I'm not trying to be the fun police. But also, this has no basis in the actual text. Draco is favored in Potions because Snape is friends with Lucius (or rather, pretending to be) and also because Snape hates Harry so that also sets up a dynamic where he is predisposed to favor someone who has an antagonistic relationship with Harry because he's viewing it through the lens of his own trauma at James's hands. Draco's not bad at potions by any means. He's a pretty good student overall. But Harry's not bad at potions either. When Harry has good instructions and a teacher who makes him feel comfortable in 6th year he's great at potions. Just as good as Draco was in the first 5 years. So it's not like Draco has any extraordinary ability in potions. He just has the opportunity to reach his maximum potential without someone undermining him at every turn. He also doesn't show any particular passion for it; during class he's usually messing around with his friends or trying to antagonize Harry. He just gets a pass for it.

He does however demonstrate extraordinary ability in transfiguration and potions. In book 6 he is able to perform a Protean Charm - a NEWT level spell that only Hermione has been shown being able to to do. Not only that, but in 4th year he's able to make the "Potter Stinks" badges, which is actually a pretty impressive piece of magic. Especially since, while most spells like that wear off after just a few hours, the badge Harry has saved inexplicably (well, inexplicably but for drarry) in book 7 is still working YEARS later. Not to mention, he's also able to fix the cabinet. (By the way, this makes it even funnier that he messed up his Charms OWL in book 5 because he got distracted looking at Harry and thus completely failed to perform a hover charm - despite being shown to be able to do so easily the beginning of 6th year).

As for transfiguration, he is shown to be able to conjure a snake on his first try in book TWO despite conjuring being something that isn't taught till the NEWT level. That is hugely impressive. And it's rarely mentioned. Draco is legit super talented. Just at different things than than Harry is.

He also shows great ability with nonverbal spells too (though I think that's more linked to his tremendous Occlumency ability; this is another topic but I think he's easily one of the most powerful Occlumenses in the book).

-18- beloved or important items or property

His wand. Draco grew up with a lot of possessions that he enjoyed. But his wand is something he prizes above almost everything else.

At first it used to bother him a bit. Unicorn core. Not really what he'd hoped for is it? His father never says anything about it, but he could tell that Lucius was surprised and a little disappointed when he saw what wand had chosen his son. Dragon heartstring would have been so much more fitting. Or phoenix feather. But unicorn? Soft. Weak. Not enough. And hawthorn wood - difficult and complicated some say, treacherous and unlucky say others.

But the wand feels so warm and right in his hand. Like a friend that understands a part of him he didn't even know he had. And it serves him well. And he grows to like how no one else can get it to work for them right on any of the rare times he's momentarily lent it to someone. And unicorns are powerful animals too. And aren't there whispers that the Dark Lord used unicorn blood to revive himself? If he did that then why can't unicorn hair be just as suitable as any other wand core for the types of magic required for his service?

It is isn't. And neither is Draco. They can force themselves through it. When they have to. When the alternative is suffering themselves, but both their cores rebel at it at some fundamental level. It's like having your soul twisted inside out, hurt, sullied. Worse in a way than the alternative. And the Dark Lord surely know that.

And then Draco loses the wand to Potter. Or gives it to him. He can't be sure. He wanted to fight back - to pull his hand away, to shoot a spell to defend himself - but something in him rebelled and he let Potter take his only weapon and companion from his limp and unresisting hand. And he can't quite bring himself to regret it, for all that he's doomed himself and probably his family too.

Potter does the impossible. Of course. He comes back from the dead. He uses Draco's wand to do what Draco never could have and kills the Dark Lord and releases them all from terror and tyranny. And then come the trials. Potter is there and Draco avoids prison miraculously. And then there is a year of probation with no wand at all, lost out in the muggle world which is loud and strange and frightening. Potter is there too, somehow. At first Draco thinks Potter must be there to investigate him - probably regretting his inexplicable choice to speak for Draco at his trial and trying to fix his mistake. But he's not. He's there to help.

He probably still has Draco's wand. Draco doesn't ask. It's not like he's ever going to see it again. It belongs to Potter or else it's in a museum somewhere as an important historical artifact - the wand that killed Him. They're not going to give it back to a disgraced former Death Eater. He'll be lucky to ever have any wand again. He hopes Potter still has it. He'd rather that, somehow, than it just end up gathering dust imprisoned in a lonely Ministry vault or behind glass in a display being gawked at by uncomprehending strangers. Being with Potter would be the happiest fate and just feels right somehow.

Eventually, against all odds the Ministry ends his probation and lifts the restrictions on his magic use. Harry seems suspiciously unsurprised though he claims ignorance. Maybe someone else would believe him - Harry is an impressively good liar - but Draco knows his expressions far too well. Still, he doesn't push it. Harry is presumably trying to spare his feelings when Draco already owes him so much.

The wand returns to him by floo the next day, along with its most recent owner. Harry thanks Draco for letting him "borrow" it. Draco jokes that he's surprised Harry was able to stand the wand's troublesome nature but Harry tells him it's a good wand, that it worked perfectly for him. He holds it out and Draco takes it. It feels like coming home, like seeing the core of himself and finally finding it enough, and in that moment he finds the courage somehow to admit the feeling that's been inside him longer even than he's had the wand - since that disastrous first meeting in Madam Malkin's - though he didn't realize it at the time.

.... ok that got away from me. but tldr Draco and his wand have been thru a lot and I think he feels a deep bond with it. Especially due to having been separated from it and being very glad to get it back. And after they get together he and Harry absolutely sometimes casually switch wands tho because they are super compatible. It bothers Ron because it feels like some sort of weird PDA that he can't even complain about.

-29- quirks and personal habits

I mean, so many. But one thing I headcanon is that after the war Draco develops a nervous habit of fiddling with his left sleeve and making sure it's all the way pulled down, especially if he's feeling nervous or self conscious.

Headcanon ask game here

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hi I just have a question and I mean to ask it as respectfully as possible

When did people start head cannoning Regulus as trans? I just dont understand how people came to that conclusion?

I’m also just very uneducated on the trans community and I know that and just don’t really know where to get reliable information about the whole community and the people in it.

Idk in my opinion I just almost feel like people made Regulus trans to meet a diversity quota. I also feel like it kind of takes away from the fact that James could be genuinely attracted to biological males? Like maybe people are still so attached to Jily that they can’t truly let go of it even in his other ship?

Sorry I just really would like to see the point of view from someone who is part of the trans community (correct me if I’m wrong on that please) and also enjoys and writes trans Regulus. It really just makes me sad that I don’t read so many fanfics that I’m sure are absolutely beautiful just because I’m a little put off by Regulus (or even Remus) being trans.

Anyway I’d love to hear the reasoning you have and I’m so sorry if any of this came off as offensive or rude🫶

Okay, so to answer your first question, the first fic in ao3 tagged with trans! Regulus Black is dated in March 2016, so 8 years ago. (I see a Jegulus fic tagged in 2005, for comparison).

As far as people coming to the conclusion of reg being trans, I think it's just people seeing themselves in the character, or enjoying the headcanon. It's not like...deciding it IS canon. If that makes sense?

For information on the community, I'm not sure what you mean. Like information in being trans? If you have questions on that, I'm more than willing to answer them! I can point you to reliable websites or try to give you my own experience.

I don't think it's 'meeting a diversity quota.' I think it's that Harry Potter is genuinely super NOT diverse. Canonically, most characters are straight, cis, and white. And fanfiction writers like to write what they want and what they relate to. Many fanfic writers know trans people/are trans, so it's natural to include trans people in their works. It's not meeting a quota, it's just emulating their lives.

And as far as James's attraction..sure, he can be attracted to people with any genitals. But I think you're missing the point that trans Regulus IS a boy. Your body doesn't equal your gender. So when James is attracted to him, he is attracted to a boy. He is, therefore, gay (or at least queer) by being attracted to Regulus. Very gently, seeing trans Regulus as a substitution for Lily because they might have similar bodies is a bit transphobic. Though body parts can be important to some people, putting Regulus and Lily on the same plane is a bit off. (Also, many people headcanon James as pansexual, meaning he can be attracted to any gender, so he doesn't care what gender people are.) You ARE right in saying that some people probably do think this way though. But it's not okay.

As far as not liking the headcanon of trans!Regulus or trans!Remus or whoever...I don't think that's a bad thing IN THEORY. For example, I don't see Harry as trans. There are some Drarry fics which have trans!Harry and I don't read them, because that's not my headcanon. Fanfics are for your enjoyment, and you don't have to force yourself to read them if they don't share your specific headcanons. I would just think about WHY you're not reading these fics. If you just see these characters as cis, then that's fine! But if it's because you might need more education of transness and what it means to be trans, then maybe take the time to educate yourself and go from there, you know?

I hope that helps!

(Also if anyone wants to chime in in the comments, you're welcome to, but please be respectful, this was a genuine question)

[haunting-hufflepuffs-basement]

From the fandom asks thing: 4, 9, 10, 16

Im curious

OHOHO! Let's start some fights, shall we?

4. what was the last straw that finally made you block that annoying person?

So the only people I have blocked actually are people that I think most people would automatically block on sight: scammers, people trying to find out where you live, TERFS and homophobes, etc. I've never really had anyone bother me over things. I'm lucky that way!

9. Worst Part of Canon:

Oh gosh. Okay, so I want to say it's the really weird surface-level worldbuilding that leaves a lot of plot holes, but there's actually something worse for me: the misogyny. And not like, there are characters that behave misogynistically, like the misogyny inherent in the writing. I'm about 90% certain that Harry Potter doesn't pass the Bechdel Test. Yes, I know the perspective character is a dude, but even the conversations Harry OVERHEARS between two girls are either glossed over or about a dude or both. The amount of prominent male characters vs. the amount of prominent female characters is frankly kind of ridiculous. There are other things you notice when you read the books as well, like how the women are far more likely to cry than the men and this is treated as a bad thing or a character weakness for the girls. Or how Ginny doesn't really have much of a character in canon (I kidnapped her and made her my own, canon doesn't deserve her) despite being just as prominent if not more important than some of her brothers and Harry's supposed love interest. Stuff like that. Also the fatshaming. Pretty privilege is REALLY prevalent in this fandom, but the books certainly didn't help by making most fat characters evil and disgusting (the Dursleys, Peter, Umbridge, etc.).

10. Worst part of Fanon:

For me, it's the notion that Peter isn't competent. Guys. Peter in canon is a cowardly slimeball, don't get me wrong, but bad at being a wizard---NO. He blew apart an entire street and killed 12 people, chopped off his own finger and transformed into a rat, and made it look like Sirius had both done the curse and killed him. He was successfully passing information to the Death Eaters for over a year and wasn't even CLOSE to getting caught since Sirius, James, and Lily still made him Secret Keeper. Those things didn't have anything to do with riding someone else's coattails, it's just Peter being damn good at his job. He was actually good at magic you guys. Probably above average actually, seeing as how he was able to hang with James and Sirius. You just don't notice it because James and Sirius are INSANELY good at magic. (Also the whole thing about making 11-15 year old Peter visibly and notably evil and bad or not a real friend or not part of the group and also the fact that he doesn't get redeemed half as much as people like Barty, Evan, and Regulus because there's that pretty privilege again. Drives me nuts. Anyways.)

16. You can't understand why so many people like this thing (trope, headcanon, characterization, etc.)

I will level with you all, I do not understand Drarry. And this isn't me not getting enemies to lovers or the Slytherin x Gryffindor appeal or the quidditch rivals or WHATEVER because I like Jegulus. But for all the similarities that Harry and James have and even for all the similarities that Regulus and Draco have, I don't like it. I think one of the biggest things is that people do usually put in the work with Jegulus stuff to "redeem" Regulus and have him unlearn his unhealthy behaviors, whereas in Drarry fics it tends to get glossed over. It also probably has something to do with the fact that Harry spent 7 years HATING Draco. I don't think that was "obsessed with him because I'm secretly in love" that was genuine hatred you guys. I don't buy it. Meanwhile Regulus and James have 0 canon interactions for me to judge their relationship with, so anything they do in fanon feels more plausible, especially seeing as how he canonically became friends with Sirius, who likely would have had some similar problems to Reg, despite Sirius' best efforts. Obviously no hate if you ship it, I just don't understand it. It's not for me, so I tend to avoid it like the plague so that I don't rain on everyone else's parade.

Thanks for asking! Everybody let me know why I'm wrong in the notes, and you're welcome to send me more asks about anything all the time always and forever!

[moonmanatee]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

sweet @saintgarbanzo tagged me even though he knows I’ve got but the one lil fic! then it got lost in my drafts. this might be a bit silly but cool to see where I’m starting, maybe. thank you, chickpea! you can find his lovely answers here 🥰

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

just one: Sun Shower!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

5950

3. What fandoms do you write for?

so far just HP, but I’ve got some drafts of other stuff (some SOC, AML, etc) that I may or may not keep working on. I did just cannibalize my favorite line from a wesper wip for a drarry one sooo we shall see

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

haha! sun shower

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do - commenting is probably my most favorite part of being a fic reader, so the comments section is important to me. there’s so much to love out there, and the comments are my favorite place to express it

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

none! don’t think I’m angst guy, really. I have some wips with pining, with complicated family feelings, with hurt, but it doesn’t quite feel like angst. and certainly won’t end that way!

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

well, surprise: sun shower has a pretty sweet ending. it feels like a beginning more than an ending, though.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I haven’t! does it count if my partner is like ‘noooo, abandoning me for the laptop again’

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

hmm, I think my smut is overwhelming and reverent and enthusiastic and honest and probably a little excessive. and WANT. and kinky. once I share some you’ll have to let me know if this is accurate

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

my mind is always thinking in connections, but that usually comes out in AU form (drarry: grace & frankie! parent trap!! the beckhams!! wesper princess diaries 2 AU!!!), rather than like everyone showing up in the same scene. so no, i guess.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

not yet, but I think I would really love this. I feel so much love about other people’s writing and so excited to share in ideas, so I feel like this format would be such a delight for me.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I don’t think I have one all-time, because once I love something I love it forever. so I just keep collecting more all-time favorites. but drarry I feel the most immense about and committed to, which is saying something because there’s very little I love that I don’t love immensely. and to be honest, my commitment to drarry is certainly because I love them as characters, but it is also about the community being so wonderful. so thank you, y’all, it’s really special here.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably never will?

so I had this completely bonkers idea that I call “avada banana tag” which is when someone dies everyone they avada-ed comes back to life, like banana tag. i.e. when Molly kills Bellatrix, we get Sirius back, etc (yes I know that only happens in the movie but bear with me for goofy concept reasons). like, the spell only holds as long as they do? makes it a pretty short-sighted way of killing someone. but that’s as far as the idea goes because it’s so absurd and messy, and I don’t think canon rewrites are something I’d know how to do justice. but I think it’s so funny and fascinating, so if anyone wants to run with it please feel free

16. What are your biggest writing strengths?

100% it’s coming up with ideas. you should see my idea dump document, it’s abundant in there. and maybe description, I hope, and sensory experiences

17. What are your biggest writing weaknesses?

I won’t call it a weakness but I have less experience with plotty things, and get really stuck in dialogue that feels off.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

I’m not fluent enough in anything else that I think I could do this myself, but as a reader I really love it, both when I do and don’t understand what’s going on. and I like communicating that they’re speaking in another language without just translating. I think I’d love to incorporate my other languages (spanish and ASL) into fic, and I also love when Draco speaks french. when it’s well done I think it’s so impactful!

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

I think it was actually someone else’s OCs, what feels like forever ago

20. What is your favorite fic you’ve written?

the one that’s still in my brain that I think about most days… it’s so very beautiful. I hope one day it makes it out of there!

though I love sun shower too. my first real guy, feels like a big deal, I’m proud of myself for doing it and actually sharing it!

I will tag @elskanellis, @getawayfox, @saintlupin, @rockingrobin69 if you want and haven’t already!!

[thedrarrylibrarian]

I've been doing all the spooky things as we get closer to Halloween. Pumpkins? Check. Seasonal soup? Check. Scary movies? Check. Leggings and sweater? Check Check. Now I can check off spooky fics from my fall fun list too!

In my opinion, there's no one who does a Halloween fic better than @corvuscrowned. Whether you're looking for suspenseful or scary, Crow has you covered. I immensely enjoyed @hp-fearfest last year, and Crow's own writing was a large part of why. I thought for this year, I'd let him share what's making him happy in the world of horror! Thank you so much to Crow for being willing to join us for Happy Hour!

Hello to all of you lovely ghouls, gaunts, and ghosties! I’m so thrilled to be able to hang out at the library during this spookiest of seasons, and I want to thank the Librarian for letting me make my status as The Horror Guy everyone’s problem!! Horror has been my lifeblood since I was young, and it’s been absolutely incredible to find so many explorations of the genre in the drarry fandom. I had such a blast co-running @hp-fearfest with my co-mod and eternal soulmate @m0srael, who has carried on the torch this year with a new group of incredible mods. I absolutely recommend checking out the fest collections, but I wanted to share a few horror fics that were written outside of the fest as well. 

Horror movies are my one true love, but I’ve always found short horror films to be immeasurably scarier. So instead of reccing one longer horror fic, I wanted to share a few short fics that use brevity to their advantage and let the reader’s mind fill in the blanks with the stuff of absolute nightmares.

Your Mind, A Jar by @floydig (473 words, not rated)

Instead of being sentenced to Azkaban, Draco is sent on a deep space exploration to pay for his war crimes. Or is he?

I am a huge fan of floydig’s writing, and have been from my early days in fandom – their prose is brutally sparse in the best of ways, and many of their fics have an artfully haunting quality that’s perfectly suited for horror. In fact, their fic Walk Right Through Me was the first drarry horror I ever read, and was what inspired me to try my hand at bringing horror into my fics.

But today I want to talk about something even shorter. At 473 words, you might think Your Mind, A Jar is a short fic - but the story it encapsulates is terrifying because it is utterly limitless. Immersive, unsettling, and characterized by Floyd’s usual dark humor, Your Mind, A Jar is the first space fic I’ve ever read, and might be the last I ever need to – because I’ll be thinking (and shuddering) about it for a long, long, long time. 

Lateralus by @shiftylinguini (2,108 words, rated T)

The world after the war was so big, and so untamed. Magic spilled out of every corner, creatures never seen before watching from nooks that never used to exist. There were colours in the air, in the morning dew drops on the leaves―indescribable, and new. Otherworldly, and pulled from a spectrum that shouldn't be visible in their world.

Atmosphere is so important to horror, and it’s one of many things that makes Lateralus work so well. The fic lives in an unsettling, suspenseful space that I simultaneously want to escape immediately and live in forever. I sometimes prefer to understand the bare minimum in horror – just enough to have a feel for what’s going on, like I’m reaching out in the darkness for something I know is there, but can’t quite see. Shifty nails this. I don’t fully understand how we’ve found Draco and Harry where they are – passing by each other in the darkness, communicating only in echoes and refractions – and I don’t need to. That’s where the terror comes from.

One of my favorite things about Lateralus is that, despite being eerie and unsettling, it doesn’t lose the romance. That’s what makes it so much more heartbreaking, so much more compelling, and absolutely worth a read.

Triptych by @theartfuldodger (1,821 words, rated M)

One afternoon, a feather emerges, marring already-scarred skin. But what other problems lie unnoticed beneath the surface?

Body horror isn’t for everyone, but that’s not going to stop me from trying to convince everyone to give it a try! If you have even the faintest of interests, Triptych should absolutely be your entry point. This fic takes the veela trope and brings it to its most visceral core, with needling feathers, scaly skin, and the relentless intrusion of wings. The dynamic between Draco and Harry is deliciously dysfunctional, and the weight of inheritance and choicelessness is as unsettling as the beautifully fucked up descriptions of Draco’s transformation. Theartfulldodger’s choice to write this fic in first person present was perfect – it puts us in such an immediate proximity to Draco’s experiences that we feel everything alongside him, from his terrifyingly changing body to his unsettling relationship with Harry.

I first read this fic a year ago, and I think it’s still one of the drarry fics that pops into my mind the most often – the images and tone are crafted so powerfully that they’re nearly impossible to forget. To me, that’s what makes good horror.

Making A Family Makes A Home by @m0srael (2,433 words, rated T)

Harry and Draco have been dating for years, but Draco still won’t move in to Harry’s place. Is it a case of cold feet, or cold something else?

I have to disclose my bias here. In addition to being one of my earliest and most beloved fandom friends, Mose was my co-mod for Fearfest last year, and has my entire spooky heart in their hands. But I think even if I’d never met Mose, Making A Family Makes A Home would still be one of my favorite horror fics of all time, because it is just. So. Fun.

Not everyone looks for fun in their horror, but I’m someone who really enjoys an indulgently gross, slightly zany interpretation of the genre, which is the note Mose’s fic hits perfectly. I’d say it’s best to go into this one blind, and be prepared for a wild ride. This fic feels like every campy classic 80’s horror movie that I love in the best of ways – it absolutely goes there, and I’m so happy that it does. 

Thank you again to the Librarian for letting me steal the mic for this month’s post! It’s been such a joy to reread my favs and share these fics, and I’m so appreciative I got the opportunity to do so. I hope everyone has a dark, delicious, and spooky Halloween, that you all howl at the moon, eat countless pumpkin-spiced goodies, and do something that chills and thrills you. Stay safe, and stay scary! 🖤

Thank you again to @corvuscrowned for joining us in the Library for a pre-Halloween Happy Hour!

❤️ As always, if you find a fic you enjoy, please remember to leave the author a kudos or a comment! ❤️

Lots of Love and Happy Reading!

[writcraft]

Hello! How would compare and contrast Snarry vs Drarry? Since you have (beautifully!) written both, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the dynamics of these two ships. Thank you!

Hello Anon, thank you for this lovely message and what a topic!

I have set out below the cut why I think the dynamics differ but also some of the similarities and it got very, very long. Yikes.

DRACO

Draco is privileged, from a wealthy, pureblood, old wizarding family and immersed in magic from childhood. He's the kind of popular where he has his crew and doesn't really care if the Gryffindors don't like him, he is athletic and bright and he is described in a way that suggests he is attractive. Up until the point things really start to go wrong for Draco, he leads a relatively charmed life. He is a product of his upbringing, of his upper class status, he experiences a childhood where he is spoiled, loved and doted on, albeit he appears to be subject to high expectations of academic excellence and sporting prowess. With his friends he appears to be something of the ringleader and generally liked. He gravitates towards Voldemort because it's really all he's known, he's born into it. At first it seems Draco's views are driven by his desire to protect the things he values (wealth, status, power) and the privilege he has become accustomed to and, in the end, he sticks around primarily out of fear and self preservation. Draco exhibits moments of cowardice.

SEVERUS

Severus has an entirely different upbringing. He is working class, has a tense relationship with his parents, he is disliked and bullied at school which leaves him isolated, he gravitates towards solitary intellectual pursuits and he is described in a way that suggests he is supposed to be unattractive (although this reader would argue he has a certain magnetic charge). Lily aside, his relationships as a child seem to be shaped by a fascination with the power that comes with wealth and elitism, something he has never experienced. Sirius describes him as Lucius Malfoy's 'lap dog' and it is telling that Lucius is much older, a Prefect when Severus starts Hogwarts. He is radicalised in a way and gravitates towards Voldemort through a greedy hunger for power, a desire for revenge and a desperate desire to change his lot in life. He stays because, well, we all know why he stays. Severus is brave but grudgingly, acerbically so. The deepest insult he confronts is being called a coward by Harry.

FIRST ENCOUNTERS

Aside from the differences in their characters, the way Harry encounters Severus and Draco is completely different. When we meet Severus in canon, he is bitter, angry, jealous, grieving and indebted to Dumbledore. He is also in a position of power as Harry's professor. When we meet Draco, he is Harry's peer but he is also full of himself, an arrogant little shit who thinks the world is his for the taking and he thinks very little of Dumbledore, because father says...

This shapes Harry's encounters with them both. Severus approaches Harry with animosity, venom and a legacy of hurt that Harry doesn't yet understand. Severus places no weight on Harry's celebrity, he actively resents and despises it. Draco, by contrast, values Harry's celebrity initially. He wants to be friends with the wizarding world's brightest star and the animosity that follows between them flows directly from the sting of Harry's initial rejection.

ONGOING RELATIONSHIP

Severus wilfully misunderstands Harry. He draws connections between Harry and James based solely on their striking physical similarities and (incorrectly) ascribes the characteristics of James to Harry. He is tasked with protecting Harry but he does so always through gritted teeth. The curse of Severus Snape is to spend his life protecting someone who represents everything he despised as a child and yet the only person who can give a dying man that last connection to his one true friend.

Draco sees Harry more clearly but his perspective is shaped by jealousy and the sting of that first encounter, which leads him to make fun of Harry's circumstances and the people he associates himself with. He doesn't misunderstand Harry in the way Severus does, but he also doesn't know him fully.

MAGICAL CONNECTIONS

The magic that connects Harry, Draco and Severus is fascinating. Harry famously uses Sectumsempra on Draco without knowing what impact it will have. He then intentionally uses the same spell on Severus (unsuccessfully) knowing exactly the damage it will do. Not only does the use of the spell in both instances show us a darker side to Harry, but the spell was also created by Severus and he is the one that helps Draco after the spell has been cast. I could write an essay on the links this spell creates between those three characters.

Expelliarmus is another one. Severus teaches Harry this spell and in doing so, equips him with his most powerful tool in the fight against Voldemort. Harry disarms Draco of his wand and the implications of that in terms of the final battle are intrinsically connected to the 'signature move' of Harry's in battle, which is all about gaining possession of the wand of the attacker as opposed to trying to target the attacker themselves.

Avada Kedavra is also something that binds the three of them. Harry witnesses Draco failing to cast the Killing Curse, and simultaneously witnesses Severus easily casting it. This also is part of the broader relationship Harry, Draco and Severus have to Dumbledore. Harry and Severus are willing pawns in the master plan but neither are fully equipped with all the information they need. Draco ends up unwittingly being part of the plan but he is never a soldier of Dumbledore's Army in the way Harry explicitly is and Severus, with a gnashing of his teeth, also is.

Finally, one of the important similarities between Severus and Draco is they are both skilled Occlumens, something Harry is notoriously rubbish at. This skill suggests both are better able to bury and compartmentalise their emotions whereas Harry is unable to do so with any success and this plays into the fact that in both ships, Harry is likely to be the more demonstrative, wearing his heart on his sleeve in a way both Draco and Severus can better disguise/suppress.

DIFFERENT DYNAMICS

With all of the above the dynamics between Drarry and Snarry will always have a different slant, even if Harry himself is essentially the same. By way of sweeping overstatement, Snarry tends to skew darker and heavier because there is much more to overcome, but by contrast Severus has also spent his 'canon' years protecting Harry which creates this bitter 'Guardian Angel' type dynamic that, if you ship it, can be intensely romantic when they encounter one another again as adults.

The age difference lends itself to different dynamics too. Harry and Draco have that potential for young, dumb and in love, working things out, exploring, eighth year and spin the bottle sort of stuff that Snarry doesn't really have in the same way. It feels more natural that Harry and Draco would encounter one another as peers from the same year group, so part of the battle with Snarry is working out how Harry and Severus end up in the same spaces together in adulthood (Snape's canon death being a pesky inconvenience). The age difference raises another important difference in dynamic too, when it comes to the experience of Severus and Draco as gay or bisexual men, if you apply Muggle attitudes to same-sex relationships that have shifted over time.

The age difference is also relevant because there is a capacity for Draco to change his ways as he grows up, but Severus has already long changed his political beliefs and we know Severus as an adult in canon. That's not to say adults can't change their beliefs of course, but because his adult character exhibits moments of real cruelty you have a challenge around how this irascible, often mean, sharp-tongued character can give Harry what he yearns for when it comes to affection, love, family, security and so on.

There are hurdles to overcome with both ships and although the core 'enemies to lovers' starting point may create a similar overarching dynamic, the roots of those hurdles, the scale of them and the ways and ease with which they get resolved will differ because ultimately Draco and Severus are very different characters with quite polarised life experiences. They have some similarities, Occlumency aside, such as fostering beliefs during childhood they reject around the same time in their lives, albeit for very different reasons. Both are Slytherins who, their magical skills would suggest, are capable of pushing their emotions down in a way Harry can't, when everything for him is raw, on the surface, now, even though they both also unleash their emotions at various points. They are both prone to dramatics, to anger, to pettiness, to humour and in many respects, Harry is prone to those things too. In general though, I believe Draco and Severus would approach a relationship with Harry quite differently.

I don't think there's any one easy way to pinpoint the different dynamics in general because there is a huge variety of ways these three can be presented in fanfic, with its own plot, worldbuilding, external factors and so on. There are so many different directions you could go in with Snarry and Drarry so I'm only speaking from some of the things that strike me not only about the Severus/Harry and Draco/Harry connections/potential hurdles but also about the links between the three of them. Ultimately I think there is opportunity for deep connection, discovery, levity, passion and of course, delicious angst and UST with both ships, but they tend to manifest a little differently for all the reasons outlines about.

There's so much more I can say, but I'll leave it there. Thank you, Anon!

[professordrarry]

*this was in my drafts. I don't know if I have already posted it? Meh. Happy Halloween! *

To the Anon who sent me the ask: "Any Ed Sheeran is Drarry".

I'm gonna pick up the pieces and build a Lego house. If things go wrong we can knock it down.

He was mostly asleep on the couch when the fire raged to life, and he didn't bother opening his eyes. He felt his feet move, his shoes gently taken off. He honestly didn't remember not taking them off. He'd been at the castle all day, repairing Hagrid's hut. It was the last thing to do, and it had taken them two years to get to it. He was exhausted, but it wasn't from the work. He felt ninety, haggered and broken.

"I'm done," he said for the millionth time. "I'm tired of this."

"Mhmm," Draco said, laying down on top of him and snuggling into the space like a cat.

"We can't keep doing this."

"So you've said," Draco sighed. "Wait, I know my part. Next, I'll say 'okay, so let's tell them', and then you'll say 'not until the castle is finished' or 'not until Hermione has her Ministry position' or 'not until I tell Ginny', and I'll say 'okay', and then none of that will happen and we'll be having this conversation again in ten days. Tell me what you need to hear so you can go back to sleep. You look awful. "

Harry gripped onto Draco's torso like he was falling, and Draco just shook his head against Harry's chest and snuggled down closer.

"It's okay, Harry. I know. There's no rush," Draco said.

But that wasn't true. There was a rush. There was a rush for Harry to stop feeling like a coward. There was a rush to make himself feel actually happy. There was an extremely important rush to telling people he was in love with Draco Malfoy.

He thought back, to eighteen months earlier, when everyone had been there to help with the ruins of their home. The ancient stones were not salvageable in many places, and more people than he'd expected had come back to rebuild. Even less than a week after the battle. He suspected they all felt the same way; like they couldn't really do anything or speak or move forward. At least helping clean up had given their hands something to do.

At first, Harry had assumed the Slytherins had been there against their will, but they all worked just as hard as everyone else. When the others began to trickle back to their lives, to reparation trials, to offered jobs and summer lives, the Slytherins had stayed the longest.

They had been there with Harry when a strange new set of first years had been ushered into a castle that was still a patchwork quilt of lost lives and broken promises of safety.

Those Slytherins had been there in the shadows of the great Hall, ready for a sorting that took place in open air, and when Harry had stood beside Draco and begun to silently cry.

They had been there when Draco's cool, firm grip had taken his hand without question and held it until his sobs had subsided.

The two of them had worked side by side, not speaking for hours on end, for weeks at a time, until the snow hit the mountains and forced them to the ruined tapestries inside instead.

When Harry had finally given in and kissed Draco firmly as they shifted the last stone into the North tower, no one else had been there to see.

And no one had seen since. Not even now, almost a year later. They're lives were otherwise intertwined, their nights almost never spent alone, and yet their friends had no idea.

And thinking about it made Harry want to scream. He finally had a plan, had his answer.

"Let's go. Right now," he declared.

He stood up, shaking his Blond Blanket off and standing too quickly, wobbling slightly in the head rush.

"What?" Draco intoned, opening one eye to look at him.

"Hermione and Ron are home. We'll go tell them. If we bring pizza, Ron might not kill me where I stand."

Draco chuckled, but didn't get up from the couch. "Why does it matter?" he yawned. "I was only teasing. We're happy, aren't we? That's enough. If you're doing this because you think I need—"

"That's not the same as being alive," Harry interrupted, looking at his feet. "We should both just get to be alive, okay?"

He went to the fireplace and held out the pot of flu powder. A small, scared smile crossed Draco's face as he slowly sat up. He moved to pinch the powder and Harry's heart leapt.

Alive definitely included Draco, and it was time everyone else knew that too.

[drarrymybeloved]

a gift for @isamijoo​ as part of the Wheel of Drarry Mini Exchange🥰💞thank you to @curlyy-hair-dont-care​ for the beta!

wc: 1.7k | rating: G

Not All Heroes Wear Capes, But Mine Sure Does

Draco Malfoy, Editor in Chief of Witch Weekly Magazine, eyes his watch and then the stack of paperwork on his desk. He knows he should stay and get through at least half the pile before lunch, but there is also a photoshoot going on in Studio B right this very second that he wouldn’t mind overseeing. Only because the photoshoot is such an important project for the magazine. Not because of the presence of a certain someone at said photoshoot, not at all.

I’m the Editor in Chief of the damn magazine and I can go wherever I like, he decides. He nods his head as if confirming his own thoughts and exits his office to head towards the studio.

Draco had begun working at the offices of Witch Weekly soon after he finished his community service sentence. Starting as a lowly clerk, his ability to charm and enamour as needed, had him slowly but surely climbing the ranks.

Now, at twenty-five, Draco is the youngest Editor in Chief in the history of Witch Weekly. Soon after his promotion, he had recruited Pansy as a columnist and Blaise as a photographer, both of whom are involved in today’s shoot.

And what a shoot it is, Draco thinks with more than a little satisfaction. Featuring the Golden Trio, the rest of the Weasley clan minus Percy who was “just too busy to make it”, Seamus Finnegan, Dean Thomas, Neville Longbottom, Luna Lovegood, the Patil twins, and Lavender Brown, it’s going to be printed as a special edition with all proceeds going to the War Orphan’s Trust. Incidentally, it’s also one of the most— if not the most— star-studded spread in the magazine’s history. Blaise will photograph all the volunteers in various costumes and get-ups, while Pansy will interview them on the side.

When the idea was first proposed, Draco had been sceptical. While the others were less recalcitrant, Potter was well-known for his dislike of modelling of any kind. He hated being in front of a camera, and everybody in the press corps knew it. Without Potter, the venture wouldn’t necessarily fail, but it would definitely not generate as much profit. Draco had meant to ask formally, perhaps through an official letter bearing the magazine’s seal. Instead, he found himself asking Potter at the weekly inter-house pub night, a tradition started in eighth year that— inexplicably— continued well past Hogwarts. Surprisingly, Potter had agreed with minimal fuss. He wasn’t happy about it, but he had agreed nonetheless.

Reaching the studio door, Draco takes a moment to brush non-existent dirt off his suit jacket and straighten his already straight tie, before pushing open the door. There are a fair amount of people milling around, talking and laughing. He can see Weasley, Finnegan and Thomas near the refreshments table. Charlie Weasley is talking animatedly with Luna while Longbottom listens with a bemused expression. Ginerva and George are slowly turning singular strands of Hermione’s hair purple as she talks passionately with Lavender. The Patil twins are having their makeup done, and Bill Weasley is being interviewed by Pansy.

Draco takes all this in with a cursory glance, his attention instantly drawn towards the man currently posing for the camera, like a compass finding true north.

Harry Potter stands in front of the camera, wearing a gladiator’s skirt cinched with a belt adorned with a golden lion, a red cape adorning his broad shoulders. A sheathed sword hangs at his waist. On his feet are black leather sandals, the straps of which rope around his muscular calves. Without his trademark glasses, his eyes look impossibly brighter. His bronze skin practically gleams under the lights. Presumably, someone had applied oil on him at some point. Draco hastily pushes away all thoughts of hands and oil and Potter out of his mind. Potter’s hair looks artfully tousled instead of its usual mess— a near-miraculous feat if you ask Draco. He makes a mental note to jot down the name of the hair stylist for future photoshoots. The thought is there and then gone because just then, Potter draws the sword hanging at his waist, and Merlin and Morgana, Draco was not prepared to see Harry bloody Potter looking like a hero out of a Greek legend.

Draco lets out an involuntary whimper.

“Hello, Draco.”

Draco quickly snaps his gaze away from Potter to find Hermione looking at him with an amused expression. The purple streaks are gone from her hair— she’d probably known what Ginerva and George were up to the whole time. Meanwhile, Draco had been so busy ogling Potter, he hadn’t even seen Hermione approach him. He flushes faintly and attempts to sound like the Editor in Chief of a major publication rather than what he actually feels like— a schoolboy with a pash. “Hello, Hermione. I hope everything is going smoothly?”

Hermione grins. “Yes, it’s all been rather fun actually. Reminds me a bit of Sunday lunch at the Burrow, what with so many people around.”

“Good, that’s good to hear,” Draco says distractedly, attention already straying back to Potter.

“Harry’s looking rather good, isn’t he?” Hermione asks nonchalantly, following Draco’s gaze.

“What? Oh, yes, yes of course. Now that you mention it, he is. That is, I mean, the stylists did a brilliant job. Especially with his hair, it usually looks like a bird's nest,” Draco lets out a strained chuckle, his cheeks burning. He never should have come down here. Merlin.

Hermione presses her lips together, her eyes bright with amusement. “You should tell him that yourself, he’ll like it,” she gestures behind Draco.

Draco turns, and sure enough, Potter’s coming off the set towards them. He doesn’t even stop to change into regular clothes, for fucks sake. How is one supposed to hold a conversation with him looking like that?

“I’ll leave you two to it then, got some catching up to do with Parvati,” Hermione says, grinning wickedly. Before Draco can say another word, she’s already gone.

Cursing internally, he turns to face Potter, determined to keep his attention on Potter’s face and his face only. Not that that’s not distracting enough. Pushing the unhelpful thought away, Draco opens his mouth to greet Potter. What comes out is, “That’s quite a get-up you’ve got going on.”

Oh joy, already off to an excellent start. Draco cringes internally but forces himself to smile in what he hopes is a pleasant manner.

Potter laughs sheepishly. “Yeah, I do feel pretty ridiculous in all this. They’ve even strapped a bloody sword on me. I barely know how to handle it.”

“Looked like you were doing alright, actually,” Draco says before his mind can catch up with his mouth.

“Oh, er, thanks Draco,” Potter smiles bashfully, bringing his hand up to ruffle his hair. Draco’s eyes helplessly follow the flex of his bicep.

Snapping back to attention, he grasps for something other than Potter’s sword-wielding skills to talk about.

"I have to say though, I was quite surprised when you agreed to this. It's no secret you dislike photoshoots immensely," is what he lands on. It’s something he’s been wondering about and he wouldn’t mind knowing what made Potter agree to do this.

“Yeah, I don’t much like being treated as if I’m some celebrity and I’ve never been good in front of a camera. I would have said no but well…” he trails off, looking at Draco intently. “You’re the one who asked, so,” Potter shrugs as if that clears everything up.

Draco blinks. In a dazzling display of eloquence, he says, "What?"

Potter flushes, but he looks determined. "I agreed to do this because I know this photoshoot is important to you. Not just this shoot, the magazine as a whole. I know that you’ve worked hard to make it into something much more than just another gossip rag. So, um, you know, I did it for you,” he rubs the back of his neck, his face flushed crimson. “It also helps that it’s for charity,” he adds, chuckling awkwardly.

Draco gapes. “But...why?” he manages, bewildered.

“Draco,” Potter huffs. “Because I care about you. As in, I have feelings for you. I thought you would have guessed by now, it’s not like I’m great at subtlety. Pretty much everyone else knows,” he smiles nervously.

 Oh. Oh.  

“You have feelings for— wait, everyone knows?” Draco demands. “And no one thought to tell me?” He hates his friends, really truly despises them all.

Potter’s eyes crinkle with the force of his smile. “Wait so, what are you saying?”

Draco rolls his eyes, attempting to sound cool and collected even though he feels practically giddy. “I’m saying, Potter, that I have had “feelings for you” as you put it, for an embarrassingly long time. And everyone knows,” he says, cheeks pinking. “Well, everyone except you, apparently,” he amends.

Potter laughs delightedly. “To be fair, you didn’t catch on to my feelings for you either.”

“We’re rather ridiculous, aren’t we?” Draco says, laughing ruefully.

“Well, we’re both in the know now, so how about we go for a celebratory dinner?” Potter asks, eyes bright.

“Good idea,” Draco says, attempting— and failing— to keep a straight face.

“Potter!” Pansy’s voice cuts across the room.

“Time for your interview it seems,” Draco says.

“Yeah, although I do have some questions for her myself,” Potter says, squinting at Pansy.

“Oh, I will absolutely be having words with her. And Hermione,” Draco huffs.

Potter smiles at him, and it’s such a wide, unrestrained thing, Draco’s heart misses a beat. “I’ll see you after, then?” he asks.

Draco nods, smile softening. “Pick me up at seven, you already know the address.”

Potter flashes him one last smile before walking towards Pansy’s corner.

Draco watches him go with what is most definitely a besotted smile on his face before turning around to leave. His steps falter when he sees all of their friends staring at him, expressions torn between unbridled glee and despair. He frowns— until he catches sight of Ron glumly handing over a handful of Galleons to a triumphant George.

“You absolute pillocks, did you place bets on Harry and me?” he asks in disbelief.

“It’s a lucrative business,” George winks.

“Sorry Draco,” Lavender says, not looking sorry at all as she pockets the coins Padma grudgingly hands her.

“I hate you all,” Draco informs them cheerfully as he heads towards the hallway, professionalism be damned. He hears them laughing as he steps into the hallway, but he’s too elated to be properly pissed off at their machinations. He’ll get back at all of them soon enough, but for now he has a stack of paperwork to finish— he can’t be late for his date after all.

read on ao3

[uh-drarry]

Previous Part

Angsty Quarantine Drarry, requested by, like, three people

(TW: talk of past child abuse) This takes place before my previous Quarantine Social Media AU

- Harry is having a hard time with quarantine despite being stuck in his house with his dads. 

- Draco is living with Blaise and has only been at their flat, the grocery store, or visited their mums since quarantine began a month or so ago.

- He and Harry FaceTime at least once a day and text constantly

- Remus is always asking Harry if Draco is staying up on his English assignments and when they say they’re working on another class he always scoffs and says English is obviously most important with a wink as he walks away

- Sirius is enjoying staying in bed longer in the mornings and waking up with Remus instead of waking up at the ass crack of dawn to help open the cafe as he usually does. He is already starting to miss it though. (But Remus and Harry benefit because Sirius will make them the best coffee or pastries some mornings)

- Draco notices something is off before Remus and Sirius because he’s constantly talking to Harry and the other two think Harry is in his room working on his online assignments and talking to Draco. Which he is, they’re not totally wrong.

- But his grades are starting to slip and Harry is getting very lonely and depressed. Some nightmares are starting to return, and his appetite is waning.

- Being stuck in one space, despite it being a house rather than a cupboard, is getting to him.

- Harry doesn’t talk about this because he thinks it’s ridiculous, it’s been over 15 years since he was removed from the Dursley’s and he’s had therapy for it for years how can this still effect him. He fears looking ungrateful for everything Remus and Sirius have done for him at times like these. 

- Draco notices that Harry seems more tired than usual and is confused about his assignments more than usual. At first Draco chalked the assignment thing up to changing to the online system but then he noticed the other things too. And he starts to get a bit worried but he tells himself that it’s probably nothing. 

- Until he keeps noticing these things and it feels like Harry isn’t contributing much to their conversations, as well as pulling away from Draco. 

- Harry usually only spends time with his dads at dinner now. He tries to paste on a smile and always offers to do the dishes so his dads don’t notice how little he’s eaten. After dishes, he usually claims he’s going to play video games or talk to Draco and his friends or go to bed so Sirius and Remus don’t bat an eye about it. They just hug him goodnight and tell him they love him.

- One night Draco has had enough of the worrying and guessing. He can’t get much out of Harry anymore and he’s getting worried. More so than before. 

- At this point Draco knew a bit about the Dursley’s and what they did to him but the two never really sat down and talked about everything. Draco didn’t want to push Harry about it and Harry didn’t want Draco worrying about him or to scare him off. 

- Draco’s mind, because of the lack of information, doesn’t immediately go to Harry’s history. But he doesn’t know what it could be thats affecting him like this. Draco knows Harry was in an abusive household as a child but that’s about it. 

- So. One night Harry is very quiet during their FaceTime. He’s laying in bed in a blanket burrito and half asleep when he mumbles out that he misses Draco a lot and his blankets aren’t as good at cuddling him as Draco is. A minute later he falls asleep with the FaceTime still going.

- Draco watches him for a couple minutes before ending the call and leaving his flat.

- He’s never snuck in to Harry’s room before, especially without Harry but he’s determined. He knows they have a spare key and that Sirius and Remus are probably watching TV in the back room together.

- He finds the key and as quietly as he can, opens the door.

- Normally he would just knock and have one of Harry’s dads let him in. But he feels like this is an important conversation to have between the two of them before he decides to bring his dads attention to the possible problem.

- Plus he’s not worried about Sirius and Remus, they love him and yeah they wouldn’t love him sneaking in but they’d listen to him before forming an opinion about why he was doing so.

- The only thing he’s worried about is them not letting him stay because of the quarantine. 

- He successfully gets in, and locks the door behind him. He can hear the tv like he assumed, and slowly makes his way up to Harry’s room where he finds a still asleep Harry with his phone still in hand. 

- He can hardly even make out Harry’s head, he’s buried so far in his blankets. 

- Draco quietly makes his way over to Harry, sits on the bed, and gently shakes the sleeping boy. 

- Harry mumbles and tells Remus to go away, but rolls over and opens his eyes when Draco doesn’t leave.

- Harry bolts upward, eyes wide when he realizes that it’s Draco who’s waking him up.

- “Wait.” He rubs his eyes and looks back at Draco, “what’s happening, why are you here?”

- “I snuck in here, darling. I need to talk to you.”

- Harry’s eyes widen “my dads don’t know you’re here? Are you okay?”

- “No they don’t. I found the spare key and they didn’t hear me over the TV. I’m okay, Harry, but I don’t think you are and I was worried and needed to check on you and talk to you in person rather than through a screen.”

- Harry calms a little when Draco says he’s okay, but avoids Draco’s eyes when he says he wants to talk. “What do you want to talk about?”

- “Babe, are you okay?” 

- “What do you mean.”

- “I mean... I feel like something is wrong. Since quarantine started you’ve slowly seemed, I don’t know, not yourself. You seem withdrawn, and like you’re not sleeping well. You were worrying about school which I thought was just because of the online thing but now I don’t think it’s that. I’m just worried and wanted to see if you were feeling okay or if you were sick or just needed a cuddle.”

- “Well I definitely need a cuddle.” Harry mumbled, he laid back onto his bed and unfurled some of his blanket so Draco could be part of his burrito.

- Draco joined him, laying so they were facing each other. They just watched each other for a minute until Draco leaned forward to kiss Harry’s nose. Harry scrunched up his nose and giggled, making Draco smile. 

- “Really though, Babe, are you okay? Do you want to talk about anything?” Draco asked, honestly quite worried about his boy. 

- Harry sighed. And started playing with Draco’s fingers while he gathered his thoughts. 

- “Well. I think-“ Harry paused, looking frustrated with himself.

- He tried again, “so you know that for a few years when I was little, I lived in an abusive home.”

- Draco nodded, “I don’t know much more than that though.”

- “Right. Well, my parents were killed when I was 2 years old. Apparently no one could find a will or anything saying that I was supposed to live with Sirius as my godfather, I still don’t understand that part. Anyway, so I was handed over to the only blood relatives I had left, my mums sister and her husband. And I lived there until I was almost 6.” 

- Draco could tell that opening up like this was costing Harry. He pulled the other boys hands up and kissed them and then leaned forward to kiss Harry properly before allowing him to continue. Before he did though, Harry scooted closer to snuggle into Draco’s chest, and Draco wrapped his arms around Harry, and rested his chin on top of his head.

- “The social workers, they didn’t check on us much. And I think they told the Dursley’s they were coming because they never caught them doing anything to me. Or maybe they ignored it. I don’t know. At least until I was assigned a new social worker, Janie. She made a surprise visit, Vernon made me answer the door because they were eating. I was taken away from them that night, especially after I showed her my bedroom because my bedroom was the cupboard under the stairs.”

- Draco tensed up, immediately livid at these people who he’d never met, and who Harry hadn’t seen since he was 6. He didn’t want to interrupt Harry though, now that he was opening up to him, so he just hugged him tighter and kissed the top of his head before taking a deep breath and continuing to listen.

- “I was like a servant to them. Especially to their son, Dudley. I had to wake up and make them breakfast, clean the house, tend the garden. If I messed up, which happened because I was a toddler, I was punished. There was a lot. I still remember a lot. No one ever believed me because my aunt and uncle made me out to be this troublesome child. I didn’t have time for schoolwork because I had so many chores. I wasn’t allowed to eat much, and I got scraps when I did. I was apparently pretty malnourished. The doctors believed that this all stunted my growth, and that’s why I’m shorter than I should be. And probably why my eyes are so bad too.”

- Harry stopped speaking for a bit then, lost in thought. Draco just continued to hug him while he waited for the rest. “They’re in prison still for what they did to me. I don’t know what happened to my cousin.”

- Harry sighed deeply, “So because of quarantine, I think, and being stuck in one place for who knows how long even if it’s a whole house this time and with people who I know love me it’s starting to bring back bad thoughts. I’m having nightmares again. Which I haven’t had for a few years now and I think I’m getting depressed and my grades are slipping and I’m worried about covid and I feel like all this is so stupid. I haven’t seen the Dursley’s since I was 6, it’s been what, 15 or so years? I’ve been in a loving home for 15 years and yet I get nightmares as soon as I’m not allowed to leave. I feel like it’s all so stupid and I’m stupid for being like this and not appreciative of my Dads for all they’ve done for me.” 

- “You’re not stupid, Harry. Not at all.” Draco could tell Harry was getting emotional and trying to let it out. He could feel a wetness on his shirt from tears of frustration and anger and sadness. But Harry continued on, unable to stop without getting everything off of his chest now. 

- “They fucking took the door off of my closet because I thought I was stuck in there when it closed on me in my first month of living here and had a panic attack. They made our cupboard under the stairs into a good and happy space for reading or hanging out. They have done everything for me and they never gave up on me. I remember them trying to come see me at the Dursley’s all the time, even though they never let them in. I love them so much and I feel like I’m ungrateful for it all when I feel like this-” He broke off, crying harder this time. After a few minutes and some deep breaths he continued again. 

- “Being stuck here is bringing back nightmares, as well as my claustrophobia and I constantly feel trapped, so I just come up here to my room and nap in bed because I’m just so exhausted all the time and I have nowhere else to go. And I try to fake it in front of my dads. I don’t think they’ve really noticed anything. I got good at lying and hiding at the Dursley’s and I hate it even if it helps sometimes.” 

- It seemed that Harry was finally done. Draco hoped he hadn’t left anything big out. He wanted to know and understand Harry on every level, and something this big was a good thing to understand, or at least to know about. 

- Draco leaned back so he could finally see Harry’s face again. He wiped his tears away, and kissed his forehead, “thank you for telling me this, Harry. I want you to know that this will not scare me away, I’m here to stay.”

-Harry squeezed his eyes shut as a few more tears leaked out, he grabbed Draco and hugged him fiercely, “Thank you, Draco. For letting me talk, for listening, and for still being here.”

- “Of course, Harry.” He let the hug go on for a few minutes before tapping his shoulder and pulling back. “C’mon. Up you get.”

- “What? Why what are we doing?”

- “I just need you to get up and grab us another comfy blanket.” Harry looked confused but obliged anyway. When he came back, Draco was up and waiting for him at the doorway and holding out his hand for Harry’s. In his other arm, was Harry’s duvet. Still confused, Harry grabbed his hand. Draco led him upstairs and out onto the roof. He walked to the middle and layed out the blanket Harry had been carrying before grabbing Harry’s hand and pulling him down onto it. He then took Harry’s duvet and rolled them up into it,  and manoeuvring Harry so he was resting against Draco's chest again while looking into the night sky.

- “Oh.” Harry mumbled when he looked up and saw all the stars reflecting back at him. 

- Draco smiled, “You said you were getting claustrophobic being trapped in your house. This way. You’re not trapped inside, but still quarantining at least. And you get to look at the beautiful sky, and feel the breeze.”

- Harry was speechless at the thoughtful gesture. He felt so loved in that moment. Draco snuck here, just to make sure he was okay. He hadn’t run off when Harry told him about his past. He keeps comforting him whenever he needs it. And now he’s doing all he can to help fight everything negative Harry has been feeling over the last month. 

- Harry wiped away another tear before he turned, leaning over Draco. He leaned down and kissed his boy. Trying to convey all of his feelings in that one kiss. He pulled back and stared at Draco for a minute, committing everything to memory. He never wanted to forget this moment.

- Harry looked into Draco’s eyes and thought he could see his emotions reflected back to him. 

- “Draco.” They looked at each other for another moment, Draco moving his hand to cup Harry’s face, while the other went around his waist.

- “I love you, Draco.” It was the first time either of them had said it. Draco's eyes widened slightly before a big grin broke out over his face.

- Draco surged up to kiss him again, then, “I love you too, Harry.” They continued for a few minutes before setting back down to where they’d been, smiles on both of their faces. 

- “Harry?” Draco asked after awhile of pointing out constellations, and certain stars.

- “Yeah?”

- “You’re going to talk to your dads about everything right? Soon? I feel like they will really be able to help you, love.”

- Harry sighed, but nodded. “Yeah, I’ll talk to them tomorrow. Will you be there with me?”

- “Of course I will. I’d do anything for you. But that’s tomorrow and I think we should probably go to sleep. It’s pretty late and you’re not sleeping enough as it is. Mind if I sleep over?”

- “Of course not, Draco. You can sleep over whenever you want. Especially if we sleep in my bed.” 

- “Well I certainly didn’t want to sleep on the couch or the floor.” The two boys got up and took the blankets back inside and down to Harry’s room before snuggling back in Harry’s bed together.

“I love you, Harry James Potter-Lupin.” Draco said with a kiss.

- Harry smiled and replied, “I love you too, Draco Lucius Malfoy.”

Next

Masterlist 

Tags: @pan-and-ready-to-stan @spaceaas @abstractundefined @afanbloglikeanother @potatoloveisreal @itsskylover23 @it-would-set-me-on-fire @panicfanatic-malfoy @drarryruinedme7 @charlenasaxen @vici-l @sweetlialia @devilrising @eruditeslytherin @malfoy-potterx 

[softheartedscorpio]

#1 for drarry

Holiday/Winter Prompt #1: Pretend to be my significant other and go ice skating with me.

Pairing: Drarry

Background: This is a war free scenario. Harry’s parents lived, there is no Voldy, no death eaters, etc. This would be their 7th year.

Thank you for the submission ❤️ I hope you enjoy!

—

“Excuse me?” Harry raised an eyebrow at the blonde standing in front of him. “You want me to what?”

Draco huffed and crossed his arms, “It’s not that hard Potter. I want you to pretend to be my significant other and go ice skating with me.”

“Why?” Harry said slowly as his eyes flickered around looking for Madame Pince. “Because,” Draco rolled his eyes. “Blaise is invited me out with him and the others, they all have dates, and I don’t want to be alone.” Harry conceded that it was a good argument, “But why me?”

Draco smirked, “Could you imagine their faces when I show up with Prince Potter on my arm?” Harry scowled at the nickname and leaned back, “Don’t call me that.” “Oh come on,” Draco sneered at him. “You’re the Gryffindor quidditch captain and the current head boy, merlin knows how you pulled that one off considering your track record.” Harry shot him a nasty look. “You’re Prince Potter and you know it,” Draco finished with a smug smirk.

“Yeah. Being an arsehole will make me want to go with you,” Harry muttered under his breath as he began packing his bags up. “Look,” Draco said quickly sensing Harry’s temper, “I’ll make it up to you. Anything you want.” Harry paused, “Anything I want?” His eyes flickered up to the blonde’s face who blanched at his words, “Uh-Yes?” He said reluctantly as he realized the position he put himself in. “Deal,” Harry smirked as he stood gracefully. “I’ll be your fake date to this ice skating thing.” Harry didn’t wait for a response as he left Draco in shock at the library table.

...

“You’re doing what?” Sirius’s jaw dropped as Harry explained what he was doing. Harry had called him on the two-way mirrors and was currently talking to Sirius, Remus, and his dad. “A Malfoy?” James wrinkled his nose, “Seriously?” Remus cuffed the back of his head, “Be nice James. Sirius don’t make that joke!” He snapped when Sirius opened his mouth. “That’s nice Harry,” He finished warmly as he looked at his honorary godson.

“No siriously—” Everyone rolled their eyes at Sirius and Remus glared at him, “What are you doing?” Sirius questioned again. “Well Malfoy asked me to be his fake date to this ice skating thing and agreed to do me a favor in return. Anything I want.” That had all the Marauders pausing, “Anything you want?” James checked. Harry smirked, a slightly evil one, “Yep.” “Ah! I knew I raised you good Prongslet!” Sirius cheered as James glared at him, “I raised him you prat! Those are my genes!” Sirius waved his words off before they both descended into an argument.

Remus sighed and took the mirror, “While those two are being idiots, let me remind you that you should be careful.” He warned gently, “Don’t be cruel with your favor.” Harry nodded as he smiled at his uncle, “Well I plan on...” He explained his idea and Remus brightened with each word, “And that is how I raised you.” He praised with a smile. Harry chuckled as he heard two identical “Oi!”’s in the background before Remus was tackled and the mirror went black.

‘Now to get ready for this “date”,’ He thought before pulling out some clothes and changing.

...

“Potter, are you re...” Draco slowly trailed off as he caught sight of Harry and gulped slightly. ‘Is that eyeliner?’ He pondered as he noted how much those green eyes seemed to stand out. Harry had chosen to go without his glasses, putting contacts in, and lined his eyes with a little bit of black eyeliner. He was dressed casually and his hair was just as messy as ever.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m coming Malfoy,” Harry rolled his eyes, not noticing Draco’s reaction to his appearance, “Are we meeting up with the others or heading straight to the lake?” Draco cleared his throat, turning away to hide slightly pink cheeks, “The lake.” Harry raised an eyebrow at his behavior before shrugging and following along, ice skates clutched in his hand. “You know they won’t believe this is a date if you walk ahead of me and won’t talk to me,” Harry mentioned casually as he trailed behind the tense blonde.

Draco paused and sighed before slowing his pace to match Harry’s, “Right. Sorry.” Harry shot him a look, “Are you okay? You seem off.” Draco did his best not to stare at the attractive teen, “Fine. Just don’t want to be late.” Harry hummed as he nodded, “Understandable. I know you snakes are big on time.” Draco turned his nose up, “Well you lions are always late to things.” Harry chuckled as he shrugged, “We show up to the important things.”

Draco shot him a look, “How did you get head boy again?” “My high grades, charming personality, and good reputation,” Harry answered with no hesitation. “Right,” Draco dragged the word out sarcastically. Harry snickered as he held the door open for his partner of the night.

“Draco! There you are!” Pansy called as she waved them over, “Potter?” A look of shock crossed her face as caught sight of the raven-haired boy. “I wasn’t expecting you.” Harry shot her a charming smile, “Parkison. Well when Draco asked me on a date, how could I say no?” Draco turned pink as he spun around and stared at him. Harry ignored his reaction and greeted the others, “Hello Greengrass, Davis, Zabini.”

Blaise gave him an appraising look, “Potter.” He greeted as the girls giggled. “I like the look,” Daphne said quietly. “Thank you,” Harry smiled at her kindly making her blush before clearing her throat and turning away. Pansy raised an eyebrow in amusement as Harry effortlessly charmed the others and nudged Draco, “Potter? You’re on a date with Potter?” Draco flushed as he nodded. “Nice. How’s he for conversation? Was he late? He looks really good,” Pansy giggled quietly. Draco gave a silent prayer to the sky, he had expected this, “He’s funny and surprisingly intelligent. He wasn’t too late. And...yeah he does,” Draco admitted.

“Are we going ice skating or what?” Blaise called out, getting everyone moving. Harry appeared by Draco’s side and looped his arm through his, “You coming?” Draco pondered the warmth he felt for a moment before nodding, “Yes.” When he received another beautiful smile that sent butterflies through his stomach, he couldn’t help but think that maybe this was a bad idea.

...

Draco was right. This was a bad idea. Harry had him laughing and smiling over the next two hours. They had skated together and, surprisingly, Harry was not as graceful on the ground as he was in the sky. Draco was given the job of helping him learn to skate and found himself less annoyed at this than he thought he would be. Harry was amusing. He was quick with his tongue and matched Blaise word for word.

“My mom,” Harry said as an explanation after a shockingly sharp remark. “She matches my dad and uncles. I’m told I get it from her.” Blaise had nodded in approval as he slowly warmed up to the Gryffindor. “I like him. We all do,” Was all Blaise said in a quiet murmur to Draco before continuing with his business. Which was true, the others did seem to like him.

He could make the Ice Princess, also known as Daphne Greengrass, smile. He had Tracey laughing at his jokes. Even Pansy was seen conversing with him frequently and actually looked to be enjoying it. Draco couldn’t help but think this wasn’t what he planned. Draco had wanted to irritate his friends and annoy them with Potter. But Potter was turning out to be more charming than he thought.

Not to mention, Draco wasn’t feeling the best himself. He kept getting warm whenever Harry held onto him, butterflies in his stomach whenever Harry smiled at him, he couldn’t help but smile and laugh when he was around, he was being pleasantly surprised with their conversation topics, and he couldn’t seem to keep his eyes off the other boy. ‘No. This was definitely not his plan,’ Draco didn’t know whether to scream or cry. He wasn’t meant to fall for Potter!

Harry was having a blast. He wasn’t prejudice against Slytherins like a lot of others were. After all, his grandmother had been one and so was his favorite aunt. Plus he himself had almost been sorted into the house of snakes. He fully enjoyed his banter with Blaise, he loved seeing a softer side to Daphne, Tracey was extremely funny, and Pansy was remarkably easy to talk to. Harry held onto a hope that they could be friends in the future.

‘Besides, seeing Draco so worked up in his presence was quite amusing,’ Harry smirked to himself as he saw the blonde blush when he grabbed onto his arm once more.

...

“This is the part when you walk me back to my dorm,” Harry said quietly in Draco’s ear as the two made their way back to the castle. Draco snorted, “You know the way don’t you?” “Of course I do,” Harry chuckled as he slid his hands in his pockets. “But this is a date after all. You’re meant to be a gentlemen.” Draco rolled his eyes, trying to ignore his urge to smile, “Whatever.”

“And this is where you kiss me goodnight,” Harry announced outside the portrait to the common room. Draco’s eyes widened as he stepped back, “W-What?” “On a date,” Harry smirked playfully. “You tend to kiss each other goodnight.” Draco flushed as he shifted nervously, this wasn’t part of the plan, “Well luckily it wasn’t a real date.” Harry hummed as he stepped forward, “What? Are you scared Malfoy?”

Draco’s eyes narrowed at the challenging tone, “No. I just wouldn’t want to catch anything.” Harry rolled his eyes, “Tell yourself that then. I’m off to take a hot bath.” Harry called as he turned away before letting out a surprised noise when Draco grabbed his arm and spun him around, “I’m not scared.” Draco muttered before pressing their lips together.

The kiss was fairly chaste and Harry quickly took control of it, pulling Draco closer. Draco was in shock at his own behavior before melting against the taller teen, Harry was a good kisser. Not surprising considering he seems to be good at most things. However, when Harry licked his bottom lip his brain seemed to shut down and all he could do was focus on him.

“Well,” Harry murmured when they finally pulled away. “That was a great way to end our first date.” “F-First date?” Draco panted lightly, cheeks flushed. “Oh yeah,” Harry said thoughtfully. “That favor I wanted? I’m cashing it in. You and me, Hogsmeade this weekend, a date. A real date.” Draco felt the urge to protest before squashing it as the warmth of Harry’s hand touched his cheek and stroked it gently, “Okay.” He found himself saying making Harry smile that beautiful smile of his. Butterflies erupted inside Draco. “It’s a date then. Tell the others I enjoyed getting to know them,” Harry pressed another, shorter kiss to Draco’s lips. “Goodnight.”

...

Draco walked into the Slytherin common room in a daze. “That’s the face of someone who just experienced the best kiss of their life,” Blaise chuckled as Pansy squealed and pulled Draco by the fire for details. “This,” Draco said after a few moments. “Did not go as planned.”

When his friends gave him a curious look, he explained what the goal was. It was silent for a few moments before Blaise started laughing followed by Pansy, Daphne, and Tracey. “What is so funny?” Draco asked irritated as he glared.

“You’ve just been out Slytherined by the biggest Gryffindor in this school,” Blaise snickered as Draco’s eyes widened. “Potter outsmarted you,” Tracey giggled. “Well technically,” Pansy said thoughtfully. “He outsmarted us all. He won all of our approvals tonight. He knows we like him. Then he made his move.” That had them all silent once more. Draco couldn’t help but blink in shock, ‘No. Things definitely didn’t go as planned.’ But as he touched his lips gently at the thought of the kiss they shared, he found he didn’t mind too much.

[monsieur-hadrien]

Lost in Translation - drarry oneshot

Inspired by this post by @drarrysdementor, 1.6k words,  16 October 2020

crossposted on Archive of Our Own

***

Harry Potter was not the most articulate of wizards. Although he had been in the spotlight since he was eleven, and even more so now with his Head Auror position, never had the boy wonder overcome his sub-par speaking skills. Hermione had told him many times that he should work on his people skills in general, and while the fiery passion he exuded in his speeches usually made up for his lack of eloquence, it did not make up for his conversational skills. What could he say? He’s a man of simple pleasures. Harry had his friends and, while he would never admit it, talking to new people scared him a bit.

Maybe that’s why he found Draco Malfoy so enthralling.

While Harry was vaguely aware that the blonde had gotten a research job at the ministry, it wasn’t until his promotion that he started seeing him around. Quite often Harry would see Draco exiting the muggle coffee shop down the road from the Ministry, his camel-colored trench coat fluttering slightly in the wind as he strutted, yes strutted, down the sidewalk, casually sipping from his cup.

It wasn’t the fact that Malfoy’s favorite morning coffee was from a muggle shop that surprised Harry the most (based on the heartfelt apology letters that he and the rest of the trio received after Draco’s trial, he assumed that the former death eater had rescinded his family’s beliefs). Nor was it the fact that he seemed to be ordering coffee - let’s be honest, the man had always seemed much too posh to ever drink anything other than earl grey and the occasional imported red wine or luxury liquor. No, it was the fact that he looked so damn fit while doing it. Draco had grown up, that’s uncontested. They all grew up, in fact, but not everyone grew up to look like that. That’s not to say that he was unattractive in school, quite the opposite really, but the newly softened facial features and, might he say, impeccable legs are truly a sight for sore eyes. Coupled with his new subtle confidence - less “bow down peasant” than their Hogwarts days, for sure - Harry became quite smitten with his former rival.

Well, perhaps he didn’t realize that he was enamored right away, but something (Harry would call it a “gut feeling” even though it was probably another certain organ) possessed him to go get coffee at that exact coffee shop one morning. Now, a normal person would have probably struck up a conversation, but Harry James Potter is not a normal person.

He decided as any other sane person would, to wake up an hour earlier than usual to purchase, what he would call over-priced, coffee, and sit in the shop in hopes of seeing the young Malfoy. Although Harry brought with him unfinished paperwork and a book to complete, he opted to “discreetly” watch the door for the next half hour.

If Draco noticed Harry while he got in line to order his morning drink, he didn’t let on. He left as quickly as he came in too, much to Harry’s demise. He couldn’t help but feel a tinge of disappointment, though he didn’t have the right to, he thought. It’s not like he had ever sought out the former Slytherin, so why would Malfoy expect him to now? Years later, much less. Harry waited a few minutes more before he left the shop as well. That was an utter failure, and obviously, Harry decided, he would not be doing that again.

Harry returned each morning for coffee for the next two weeks, and each morning he was promptly ignored by the one man he attended for.

It was Friday. Harry had planned to go home early that day, but an accident in the field (including a pet kneazle, an illegally obtained vial of amortentia, and a trampoline - how the trampoline got there, no one knew) gave him enough paperwork that he’d be up quite late that night. Near dinnertime, Harry collected his papers and tucked them into his bag to bring with him as he grabbed a bite to eat, but before he could leave, there was an angry rapping at his office door. He sighed, exasperated, and went to answer. Opening his door, he expected to see Hermione or Ron ready to scold him for forgetting some very important event, like a charity ball for Britain’s animal shelters or, Merlin forbid, a Chudley Cannons match.

Instead, to Harry’s delighted surprise, standing outside the door was Draco Malfoy, glaring at him with a cold fury. Any fuzzy feeling that Harry had disappeared when he saw the look on his face.

He scratched the back of his head awkwardly. “Can I, uh-”

“Yes, I would like to know the reason that the Auror Department has been following me for the past two weeks.” Draco’s tone read as polite, but his tense shoulders and the fists balled at his side told Harry otherwise.

Bewildered, Harry states, “The DMLE hasn’t been-”

“Oh, cut the shit, Potter.” Draco shoved past Harry, entering the office while slamming the door behind him. “The Malfoy family owes nothing more to the Ministry. We’ve already allowed the Auror Department to search and seize any dark artifacts at the manor, and my father is serving his time in Azkaban as we speak if you haven’t forgotten. I will not have the Ministry slander my family name any more than they ha-”

“Draco,” whoops, that one slipped out, “I have no clue what you’re on about.”

His polite front vanished, “Don’t play coy with me, Head Auror Potter. I’ve seen you every morning for the past two weeks watching me get tea. I’m not as dense as you seem to be.”

Harry froze. Oh my god, that’s embarrassing. “Oh,” was the only thing he could think to respond with.

Draco laughed, but there was no humor in it. “Oh? ‘Oh?!’ Is that all you could think of to explain yourself? You may be the Savior of the Wizarding World, Potter,” Harry cringed at the nickname, “but you aren’t above the law. I will be reporting this to Minister Shacklebolt if you don’t explain yours-”

“I wasn’t trying to follow you or anything…”

“Then what the hell do you call the past two weeks, Potter?”

“... Well maybe I did.” Draco scoffed at him and almost began speaking again, but Harry started before him. “But it wasn’t because you did anything.”

All he got in response was a calculating stare as if Draco was trying to catch him in a lie. He must have passed because all Draco said in return was, “Then why?"

Harry could feel the blood rush up to his ears and he nervously reached for the nape of his neck. He did not want to look the other man in the eyes at that moment. Literally anywhere other than him. “Uh…”

“Ah yes, Potter, very articulate as always. Now spit it out.”

The blush began to migrate to Harry’s cheeks. Damn Malfoy for looking so fit even when he’s angry. He mumbled a confession, his words stringing together into an incoherent jumble of syllables. “ well idon’tknow i saw that you wenttothat coffee shop all the time‘n i wanted totalkto you but i didn’ know howso i decided ‘oh why not just go in ‘n see if he talkstome first’ but then you didn’t so i was like ‘oh maybe i should juslikenot’ but then i kept going i don’know i didn’ mean to make you uncomfor-”

“Harry Potter, I cannot understand a word you are saying.”

“I wanted to ask you out.”

Draco just quirked his eyebrow. “vous devez travailler sur vos compétences en relations humaines, Monsieur Potter.”

Harry’s face scrunched up in confusion. “What?-”

“Je pensais qu’on parlait différentes langues pour s’amuser.”

“I don’t know what you’re saying.”

“I didn’t know what you said earlier either,” the blonde replied with a smirk with only half the malice he had when he walked into the room.

Harry just looked even more confused, dazed even. Draco slowed his speech down, as if talking to a small child, “That wasn’t English you were speaking.”

“Oh?...” Pause. “Oh…”

“Is parseltongue a defense mechanism, or do you just people skills equivalent to that of a garden snake?”

“Shut up, Malfoy.”

“I thought it was Draco to you now, Auror Potter?” Harry groaned in embarrassment and buried his face in his forearms as he sat back down in his office chair. “But I would like to know what you said,” Draco continued after a beat, his smirk disappearing.

In a fleeting moment of courage, Harry pulled his head from his arms and looked Draco in the eye, his blushing face as honest and open as he could be. That’s one thing he was quite good at, being honest. “I was going to ask you out to coffee.”

Draco’s face was impassive. “Like… a date…”

Harry confirmed with a short nod, his eyes focusing on anything other than Draco, nerve gone. “Yeah, a date.” His voice cracked. Again, very embarrassing. Harry decided that an early grave might not be too bad at this point.

A few beats went by. Draco’s calculating expression morphed into one of determination, a very good look on him if Harry was being honest. “Tomorrow morning at 9. I’ll be waiting at the coffee shop. Au revoir.” He moved with grace to the door, the same walk he had every morning. Leaving a very confused Harry in his office chair, Draco opened the door to leave, but not before turning around to say, “Don’t be late.” He grinned and walked out to the hall, closing the door behind him.

Harry sat there, staring at the door for minutes after, processing the encounter. He got a date, yeah. But what stuck out to him, probably the most important part of that conversation, was that he was fucking right.

Draco Malfoy, like the posh git he is, orders tea from a coffee shop. Whether it’s earl grey or not, Harry did not know. He would, however, be asking tomorrow.

***

[potterlovemail]

Math Tutor - Drarry Headcanon

(modern au)

Harry Potter wasn’t the brightest student in his classes. Throughout highschool, he managed to be pretty decent in his studies; he had B’s, and rarely any D’s. This pleased his parents greatly— though, they never really were strict on grades, they simply wanted Harry to live on happily and become whatever he wanted to in the future.

James is a professor at Hogwarts University. Basically Duke, but aim just a tad bit lower. Hogwarts was known for having many gifted students attend; no person was the same as the last. It seemed everyone had their own interests.

Though, Harry had no idea what he was going to do. He thought about teaching like his father, but it seemed far fetched. He could hold his own in class, teaching on the other hand— no. Harry hated teaching. Those times teachers would ask him to explain his answer, his mind almost always went blank. Maybe he was nervous, or perhaps he just disliked explaining himself. He’d put the future aside for now. There are more important things to be worrying about.

First day on campus, and they’ve been given their roommate’s name. Harry didn’t really mind having a roommate; just as long as they weren’t horribly annoying. He’d have to share a room with someone named Draco Malfoy. He had no idea who the hell that was. Harry had heard of the Malfoy name— apparently, they funded Hogwarts for a little bit. They were wealthy, Harry knew that much.

On the first knock, who supposedly is Malfoy answers the door. Harry didn’t know what he was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t this. Malfoy was darn gorgeous. That’s right, Harry was into blokes, and what are the odds that he landed a room with someone as attractive as that.

“Holy shit,” Were the first and only words to leave the stunned male’s mouth. “Nice to meet you too,” Malfoy stepped out of the way so Harry could walk in and drag his luggage along. He does so reluctantly, eyes trailing Malfoy. Malfoy’s eyes were grey, and it was pretty much the most beautiful shade of grey Harry had ever seen. Oh, boy, he was crushing big time.

“You’re staring. Is there something on my face or are you just surprised that I’m your roommate?” Malfoy’s voice cuts through his thoughts. The blond knew where he was at the Popularity charts. “Well- I.. actually didn’t even know who you were till now,” Harry tries his best to stand his ground and not stammer. “I mean i’ve heard of the Malfoy name, of course,” His heavy feet crossed the room, heading to the empty bed which Harry assumed was his. Malfoy had pretty much unpacked everything. His bed looked expensive compared to Harry’s; the mattress looked fluffier, and just comfortable while Harry’s looked flat, and plain. Maybe Malfoy had paid them.

“Alright then. You stay on your side and mind your business, and we’ll be fine,” Malfoy states calmly, sitting down on his bed with a proper posture. Harry couldn’t stop himself from looking just a little bit longer. This seemed promising.

A week of sharing a room, and the two males realized that they literally were opposites. Harry’s closet looked like a jungle compared to Malfoy’s. Even the dark haired male’s hand writing was put to shame with Malfoy’s bloody cursive writing. Damn rich people.

Harry wasn’t proud of it, but they’d argued sometimes. Mainly it was Malfoy complaining about how Harry took too long in the bathroom, and how Harry had used up all of the shampoo. Their mornings usually went like this, and they parted ways for their classes sharing insults.

“Git.” Harry walked out the door first, trotting down the hall to get to his class, bag clutched tightly in one arm. “Prat!” Malfoy bellowed, just enough for Harry to hear as he speed walked. It was hilarious to the blond. Despite this, Harry was still crushing. How could he not? Malfoy just seemed so.. perfect. Gosh, it was still a shock how he had managed one week without throwing himself on the male. If he did that he’d probably be sent to the nurses with a broken nose, or maybe a concussion. He didn’t even know if Draco liked guys.

Second semester, and Harry was having serious problems with Math. Math wasn’t his best subject— it was definitely his worst. One particular evening, Harry’s jotting down notes messily and trying badly to recall everything. He has an exam in about 4 days. He’s so focused, he doesn’t even realize that Malfoy was watching him.

“You seem like you’re actually thinking. It’s hurting to watch,” Malfoy snorts, and Harry’s head snaps up to glare at him. “I’m doing my best to study. I’m not stupid, alright?” He rolls his eyes, averting his gaze back to his near crumpled folder paper. “I didn’t call you stupid. Not really. But, I could help you with that,” The blond offers. “And why would you want to do that?” Harry’s interested, definitely. He would never pass up on that, he really needed the help, but he also wanted to know what Malfoy was up to.

“Just cause. And i’m bored, the poor need my help.” Only Malfoy could make Harry as irritated as this— yet the dark haired male wouldn’t act on his annoyance. He didn’t want to make their ‘friendship’ worse than it was, and besides, he wants to be more than just silly roommates and friends. “Fine. Help me,” Harry groaned, crossing his legs as Malfoy made his way over to him. “Great. Now scoot.”

Malfoy wasn’t a bad teacher, or rather, tutor, at all. He helped Harry with things he couldn’t wrap his head around, and even took the time to explain it thoroughly. Harry couldn’t tell if Malfoy was just showing off, or trying to help.

Harry’s heart felt as if it’d leap up his throat any moment; they’d never been this close to each other. Knees made contact, shoulders touching briefly as Malfoy pointed to certain equations. Malfoy’s hand brushing against his as he stole away Harry’s pencil to demonstrate. All of this made Harry slowly insane.

“You look a little pink. Don’t tell me you’ve got a fever of some sort,” Malfoy comments, pausing his very useful tutoring. “I’m fine, peachy,” Harry shrugged, knowing damn well the blush on his face only deepened.

He was going to die if he didn’t make a move soon.

Harry decides that a week later is when he’ll make the first move. Was it probably the scariest thing he’d ever done? Yes. Merlin, yes. Harry was never an open romantic, he didn’t give out much hints. It was because he just didn’t want to be rejected, but he strongly felt he had a chance with Malfoy. For whatever reason.

So, this is how he did it. “Hey, I need you to errr.. explain this one again to me.” Harry asked, fidgeting with the pencil in his hand. “Sure.” Malfoy peered at the paper, expecting a complex equation ready to be explained, but he was met with something different. Harry had written, ‘You’re cute’ just underneath his notes. Malfoy fought back a smile, looking back up at Harry. “Everyone tells me,” He cooed, and Harry nearly groaned out in frustration.

That’s right, how was he supposed to flirt with the gracious Malfoy; who’s expectations were as high as skyscrapers and the Eifell Tower.

“Thanks.” Draco muttered, breaking eye contact. Harry blinked; it hadn’t gone so badly.

He keeps it up, writing down small compliments where Draco could easily spot them. Each time he did, he knew he was getting somewhere— because Draco had become different. He wasn’t purposely insulting the dark haired male, and if he did, it was jokingly. Harry felt like he was floating. This was all he’d ever wanted since the first day he’d walked in and blurted out, ‘holy shit.’

He hadn’t even realized how fucking amazing Draco’s laugh was till he was the one who had made him laugh. At the end of the day, Harry had finally asked him out. ‘I really think we could make this work. Not the math— but, you and me. What do you say?’ Harry had tried his best to make his handwriting neat and decipherable.

“Hmm.. well, I’m not sure. If I dated Potter would that ruin my reputation? Most likely, yes.. “ Draco looked up at the ceiling as he talked to himself, and Harry gulped. “But, I don’t give a fuck,” The blond adds, and Harry lips curve upwards, later breaking into a wide grin. “So then..?”

“Yes. Prat, I’ll go out with you,” Draco’s rather angelic laugh comes out again, and suddenly, Harry’s kissing him. Draco kisses back quickly, and it’s like a fire lit in both of their stomachs. It was the spark that Harry had been longing for.

Sadly, even after all of that studying, Harry managed to get a 73/100 on the semester finals. Not too shabby, but Draco would definitely have him redo his notes.

[onlytaylor]

Drarry + Facing Demons and Finding Family

Tw: mentions of symptoms of depression, anxiety, ptsd, and child abuse. All are resolved with a happy ending.

Draco Malfoy walks the cobblestone streets of Diagon Alley, and it’s different now. The way it had bustled with a vibrant vivacity in his younger years is long gone now, replaced by the mediocrities that come with running errands and making stops for work. It had been repaired, for the most part, after the war, but something about the shadows of buildings that used to be constructed just a little bit different haunts Malfoy in his steps.

He turns to glance over his shoulder when the sound of a child laughing fills the spaces between bustling bodies and adult feet. A familiar tuft of blue hair comes dashing forward, and Draco feels a momentary reprieve from his own hollow dissonance. His face lights up as the boy throws his arms around his neck, crying “Cousin Draco! What are you doing here?”

And behind the vivacious grin is the humble one of Harry Potter, the boy who really did end up saving the world. Draco doesn’t hate him; how could he? If it weren’t for the testimony of the man standing there now casually in his Muggle plaid shirt and ripped-up jeans, Draco wouldn’t be walking these streets.

“Malfoy,” he puts his hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth a bit on his feet. “What sort of business are you up to these days?”

“Oh, just... dropping off a package for the boss. You know.” He shrugs, suddenly vacant. His momentary reprieve shrinks into a daunting reality.

“Wanna come get ice cream with us?” Teddy’s toothy grin eats at the edges of his impending monotony.

“Oh, well, I wasn’t-“ he starts, but Harry Potter has stepped his foot forward.

“No, please. If you’re not too busy, we’d love to catch up. Teddy misses you.” And, allowing the package to feel a bit lighter in his coat pocket, Draco turns on one heel and heads to the parlor with them both.

***

Having Teddy Lupin run through his life is like chasing a tiny piece of dynamite. You never know just when it will explode, and when you’ve got it in your fingers it seems to roll invariably to the floor. Draco’s been waiting now for quite some time for his own destruction, but his regularly timed meetings with Harry (wow- really on a first name basis now) and his cousin had brightened his steps countably.

It seemed that the sparking fire may just never come.

***

Draco Malfoy doesn’t visit Malfoy manor, and its empty rooms are surely hung with cob webs and dust mites and other small creatures that have made it home. The stone exterior is beginning to succumb to a green vine that twists its way up the foundation, and apparently small children dare each other to knock on the door of the “Death Eater House.”

Draco doesn’t have to visit Malfoy Manor to know which ghosts roam its halls, apparitions of tortured souls and the results of his own mistakes. If only he’d stood up to his father. If only he’d run. If only...

Draco swallows, once, then twice, before straightening his stare ahead. Harry’s coming over soon, and this time Teddy is at the Burrow. They’ve never hung out like this, quite alone and unsupervised by Teddy’s string of home-made knock knock jokes. He’s not sure why, but he’s nervous.

***

After the war, Draco had considered himself a work-in-progress. He’d ventured through the stages of grief, mourning his losses and wishing he could change the past. He’d also picked himself up off of the floor, vowing to start new. None of this was easy. Panic followed him around every corner, but around every corner was the reassuring laugh of Teddy; smile of Harry. If he’s honest with himself, he’ll admit their great assistance in his own healing.

But that doesn’t stop the nightmares. Or the constant feeling of dread. And when Draco Malfoy is alone, his guilt consumes him. Why hadn’t he done the right thing? Why hadn’t he stood up to his father?

***

When Draco was eight, he’d drawn a portrait of his family. It was an assignment by his private tutor, a sort of busy-work while she prepared more practice for magical theory. He’d drawn them, stoic and cold, using shades of gray and black to fill in the spaces between them. They didn’t touch, didn’t love. Lucius told him that artists didn’t make any money in the Wizarding World. Draco ripped up the drawing and threw it in the rubbish bin.

***

When Draco’s lease on his London apartment is near its end, Harry finds him with a nervous twitch of his lips.

“You know, Draco, you don’t have to move into another building. I know you hate your neighbors because they remind you of your family. Our flat is large enough for a third member.”

Draco had almost immediately rejected- his first instinct was to scoff at any such attempts at pity. But Teddy’s eyes had met his, bright and foretelling- and his pleas almost melted Draco’s shoes to the asphalt.

“If you really want me to,” Draco smiles, “I’m sure that can be arranged.”

***

Draco hadn’t realized that his ghosts would follow him here. But as he watches the shadows dance upon the walls of his very own room, he knows he’s not dreaming. It’s his father, reminding him that he will never be good enough.

It’s his mother, watching with irrefutable silence.

It’s himself, pointing a wand at Dumbledore. Leaving with Snape. And abandoning his dreams to follow in his father’s foot steps.

It’s a portrait of Draco’s family, stone cold and frozen against the frosted window pane.

He doesn’t realize he’s screaming.

Not until the door is thrown open, and Harry’s there, sporting nothing but a pair of boxer shorts and a concerned purse of his lips.

He’s on the bed, and now Draco is crying. Yelling. Laughing hysterically. Because he’s fucking insane, sitting in a bed half-naked with Harry Potter and telling himself to shut his fucking mouth before Teddy wakes up.

But Harry is gentle. He wraps his arms around his shoulders and whispers “I know. But it’s not true. None of it is real.”

And Draco sobs, without really knowing how to stop, and Harry’s skin is warm against his own. It’s the first time he’s ever really felt whole.

Hours pass, though the clock reads otherwise. And Draco tells him that he needs to go back to bed. That they’ve both got work in the morning, and Teddy is visiting Andromeda...

But, no, Harry whispers, this is more important. You are more important. When had their relationship morphed into this... whatever this is?

Draco Malfoy allows himself to be held, and it is surprisingly wonderful.

***

Working for the ministry is like working in one of those Muggle cubicles. He should be grateful for the opportunity, but Draco hates his job. His boss is monstrous, a poised figure that reminds him far too much of his father.

He gets a bit panicky when requests are made, unable to say no. Draco Malfoy never thought he’d become a push over, but his inherent desire to please, to win, to have a second chance is tumultuous.

He doesn’t know how to live without it.

***

Teddy is spending the night at the Burrow, and Draco and Harry are doing their usual dance of washing and putting away the dishes.

“Fancy a movie?” Harry asks, and something soft flutters in Draco’s chest.

“Sure.”

***

It’s midnight when Draco feels the gentle presence of Harry slumped against his shoulder, his quiet snores a rhythm that he begins to memorize.

He doesn’t move, and the stillness is what allows him to feel the sporadic twitches that begin to ripple through Harry’s body.

“No, no,” he murmurs, “Please, no. Hermione... Cruciatus...”

Draco freezes, and he immediately understands the inner workings of Harry’s psyche.

He was there when his aunt Bella inflicted near irreparable damage to Hermione Granger. He didn’t stand up. He didn’t stop her.

There’s a tightness in his chest, and it fluctuates with his heart rate. Harry is having a nightmare, and it’s all his fault.

“You’ll never make up for what you’ve done,” he hears his father say, and the words are a gun to his head.

“Harry,” he whispers, desperately running his fingers along the side of his arm to calm him. If he couldn’t go back, the least he could do is aid his sleep.

Harry settles, and Draco breathes a sigh of relief. His father is laughing at him.

Ghostly shadows dance along the walls, flickering in the dim light of the TV. The world seems to grow around him, and he is infintismal.

His palms are sweaty as the guilt settles, rotting a hole in his stomach. And then there’s a whisper, a subtle word that shifts everything: “Draco.”

He glances at Harry’s face twice to make sure he’s not imagining the slight tug at the corner of his mouth. He said Draco’s name. And, from the depths of his slumber, he’s smiling.

Draco’s eyes are prickly, and he’s not sure why there are tears surfacing at such an inopportune moment. Perhaps he’s gone completely insane... or maybe...

“Not your father, Draco... amazing... need you... love you...”

A light seems to dissipate the shadows, which morph and expand into unidentifiable shapes before they slowly vanish. Draco’s hands are still clammy, but his mind is on overdrive.

The Savior of the Wizarding World is dreaming about him. Believes in him. Maybe, even...loves him?

And the remaining shadows come crashing down, spirits that find rest in redemption. If Harry Potter, with his stupid scar, and his stupid broomstick, could think highly of Draco Malfoy, the ex-death eater... maybe he could forgive himself.

Maybe... and then there are images flashing through his mind. Of stone family drawings and cruel and unjust punishment.

Of the desire to please, so much, that if his father pointed a wand at his throat he’d beg for forgiveness. Of pretending to have dignity for so long that he’d lost his own along the way.

And then, another sleepy rasp from Potter: “not your fault...”

And something snaps inside him.

“Not my fault,” he repeats, barely audible, yet it rattles an earthquake that cracks the floor. The ground faults, and everything he’s ever know crumbles before him.

“You are pathetic.” The voice of his father shakes the walls, breaks the foundation. Rips open the fortress of his solitude, jagged lines coursing through his very being and down to his core.

There’s a wand at his throat.

Harry isn’t here. Here, it’s a Malfoy’s paradise, and Draco’s skin crawls at the realistic image of his father before him. He’s so fucking life-like, the drawl of his criticism dripping with the poison of a basilisk. He’s smiling, and that hurts. It’s malicious.

But then, another whisper. A distant proclamation that rings through the periphery of his hearing. “Draco... always... good enough...”

Fuck. Harry?

“Good enough,” he repeats, the syllables a solid reality, just like the man before him. And, in a sudden fit of realization, Draco realizes the epitome of his salvation.

“You’re not real,” he says, and the words are a bit shaky as they permeate the air. His father’s face twists into something unreadable, a cross between a scowl and utter shock.

“You’re not real.” The wand lowers. His brow narrows.

“You were never real. My father is in Azkaban. You are just the ghost of what he did to me.”

His hands are drifting into the atmosphere, like grains of sand dissipating toward the floor. His expression morphs into utter fear, and, for once, Draco feels powerful.

It was never about defeating him. He could have dualed his fractured subconscious for years, constantly bettering himself, only to fall again. And the wand would always be pointed at his throat

But Harry, Harry said he was good enough. And he can hear the distant titter of Teddy’s amusement, the padding of his socks as they bounce along the hardwood floor of their flat. Of their home.

Harry cares. Loves. And so Draco must love himself.

“You could never kill me,” he says to the air, as the whisp of Lucius Malfoy’s presence fades into nothing. “It was just me, all along. Hurting myself because you trained me to. It wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t my fucking fault.”

There’s a sudden whoosh, and the room is spinning. And then it’s not. And Draco Malfoy is sitting next to a blissfully sleeping Harry Potter in a London flat.

The movie is over, and all that remains of the last few minutes is a line of scrolling credits.

The shadows, they’re gone. And somehow, Draco is no longer haunted. The house is peaceful, and a serenity seems to fill it’s every crevice, binding the cracks that once cleaved the walls. He pulls Harry closer, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. Taking a risk he’d never had the confidence to execute.

Harry smiles, stirring a bit before turning his green gaze upward. “That’s nice,” he says, and Draco chuckles.

“Yeah, it is, hm?”

“Hey Draco?”

He doesn’t reply, but meets that vibrant stare of his with irrefutable honesty.

“Thanks for being a part of our family.”

“Family?” The word nervously slips his lips. He’s never done this before.

Harry nods. “You, me, and Teddy.”

His eyes are prickly again, and he swallows a hard lump in the back of his throat. “I love the sound of that. Of family.”

“Good. Because I’ll hex you if you go anywhere. Old habits do die hard, you know.”

Draco laughs, hearty. Whole. Harry snuggles into his shoulder, falling asleep lightly as he thoughtfully plans his next project.

***

The next day, Teddy enters to find Draco drawing a picture of his family at the kitchen table.

“Whatcha doin’?” He asks curiously, hopping onto Draco’s lap as he sketches.

The picture before them is a family, a blonde, a brunette, and a tuft or blue hair between them. There are no spaces, no empty holes between their bodies, and the sky is a vibrant array of purples and oranges.

“Let’s hang it on the fridge!” Teddy exclaims, grasping it and running to attach it to the front of the surface.

Draco eyes the picture smiling, and it is the best he’s ever felt.

[carynsilver]

Favorite Fics: Drarry Edition

Like I mentioned last time, reading has been a big comfort to me with all this craziness and sheltering at home, so I want to pay it forward and send love to some of the writers whose work has been brightening my quarantine. Thanks, guys!

For this list, we’re leaving the MCU for a while and heading over to the Wizarding World. I liked Harry Potter when it came out, but I never really read much fanfic until I realized a couple of years ago how much a redeemed Draco fit into the redemption trope that I loved in Harringrove, LoVe, SnowBaz, and other fandoms and ships. Once I started perusing the fics out there, I realized that one of the strengths of this fandom is the length and quality of the stories. I love stories that are a meal, and Drarry provides so many!

As I’ve gotten into the ship (so many years late, lol), these are my top 10 favorites.

dirtynumbangelboy by @magpiefngrl

This is probably the Drarry fic that I most enjoy. I come back to it fairly often when I need just a good read in the HP world. Fake dating is one of my absolute favorite tropes, which made this one an automatic win for me, but it’s written with such heart. I really, really love Draco in this fic. His uni studies and his flat being so different from the diffident image he projects. This is also probably the best Astoria I’ve ever read. Also--Jam Today! Read it now!

Do It All Over Again by DracoWillHearAboutThis

I only discovered this series earlier this year, and I’ve already read it at least three times from beginning to end. It’s a re-telling of the original series starting from Book 1. Draco sends himself a letter from the future basically saying that his dad is wrong, and he needs to give up his pure blood ideals and befriend Harry, then--boom--the Golden Trio’s adventures all happen with Draco in tow (and eventual romance, of course). The plot is fairly similar to the actual series, but I am there for the angst and the character growth. Narcissa kicks ass in this ‘verse, and Draco/Hermionie as besties is a treat! Book 4 and Book 6 are both amazing. And her titles are hilarious. This is the only series on my list that is still a WIP, but there’s plenty to read. Books 1 - 6 are complete, and a new chapter for 7 comes out every two weeks. It’s a safe bet so far, and it’s so good--why wait?

A Secondary Education by Thunderbird587

In this fic, Draco takes a job as Potions Professor at Hogwarts after getting divorced under horrible circumstances and renews his acquaintance with Harry, who is the DADA Professor. It’s got a bisexual awakening, and manages to combine friends with benefits with some supreme pining. Like a whole pine forest. Thunderbird587′s Draco POV is so fleshed out, and yet it also lets us see how Harry is pining, even when Draco himself doesn’t. Plus, at over 200K, it is long enough to get lost in for ages, which is perfect right about now. And when you finish the main fic, there are three other ancillary fics, two in Harry’s POV that take place during the main one. The cufflinks one is my favorite, but the writing is so good that I even thoroughly enjoyed the third sub-fic that fleshed out an OC. So, so worth the read--all of it!

The Foundations!verse by Saras_Girl

All of the fics by Saras_Girl are great. You can’t go wrong with any of them. But Reparations, Foundations, and all the little one-shots after are my favorite. It honestly surprised me at first, because alcoholism is a trigger for me, but this fic actually helped me realize that it’s the addiction part, the fall to rock bottom that triggers me. Recovery stories are different. And, I guess, this one is a bit different in that, though it has plenty of characters recovering, Draco himself is actually in a healthy place and facilitating recovery without relapsing. Harry is a Healer in this one, which is not the usual, and I quite enjoy his other relationships in this ‘verse, as well. He, Ron, and Hermione’s friendship is great in this one (their pub nights crack me up), but I also really like Harry’s friends at St. Mungo’s. My second favorite Terry Boot ever, and two awesome OC chicks. And the process of Drarry going from can’t stand each other to in love is slow and prickly and yet really believable. Oh, and Harry and Narcissa’s relationship in this one is just fabulous.

Golden Age by zeitgeistic (faire_weather)

The Hufflepuff in me was bound to fall in love with this fic. I really enjoy Eighth Year fics, especially the ones that embrace inter-house unity (shouldn’t have taken them a war to see the need for that!). This one takes it to a new level when everyone in... I think it was 6th - 8th years were resorted at the welcome feast, and the whole 8th year dynamic is shaken up. Harry, Draco and Neville become Hufflepuffs; Hermione and Pansy become Ravenclaws; Ginny becomes a Slytherin; and somehow Ron and Blaise are the ones who stay in their houses because the hat thinks they are basically the uber Gryffindor and Slytherin. But with the rest of them, we get to see them embrace other facets of their personalities, which is super interesting. And then, after the resorting, we find out that Hufflepuffs have a whole different world going on that basically no one outside their house knows about, and that world is brilliant. Even Hufflepuff food in the Great Hall is different! Everyone would enjoy this story, I think, but if you are a ‘Puff, you really, truly should not miss it. And if you like this one, check out some of zeitgeistic’s other works. Her world building is fabulous.

Life skills outside the curriculum by Endrina

In this fic, Harry gets fed up with the Dursleys before his 11th birthday and runs away before he gets his Hogwarts letter. He ends up on the streets and somehow embraces this kind of instinctual magic that is really fascinating. A few years later, Draco runs away rather than get involved more closely with the Dark Lord, and of course they meet up. This whole fic is super compelling. Harry’s world view and the way people gravitate toward him even without chosen one status. Also, this fic has one of my favorite versions of Remus and Sirius ever. I really wish there was a part two that went in depth on everything that happened after the end of this one, but even on its own it is so worth the read. And everything is wrapped up. I’m just greedy and would’ve loved more. :-)

A Convenient Impracticality by @firethesound

This fic combines friends with benefits and fake dating into a really enjoyable story. Harry is so oblivious, but it all works out in the end. And Draco is a secret mastermind, but in a good way. So is Hermione. Unlike some of the other, angstier stories on my list, this one is so fun, and I love it. And if you like it, check out more of firethesound’s work, as well. It’s worth it!

you’ve got the antidote for me by kandakicksass

And then, back on the angst train, lol. Soulmates, red string of fate, rejected bond = terminal disease. Whew! There’s a lot to unpack in this one, but after I read it, I never forgot it. I read a lot of fic in a lot of fandoms, and I always know a story is going to become a favorite if it stands out so much that I remember it later and think about it. That surely happened here.

(We’ll Call This Fixer-Upper) Home by phdmama

This is one of the first fics I read on my first Drarry binge, and I’ve always remembered it. Just like I love Eighth Year and Hogwarts professor fics, I also love fics where they have really unexpected jobs--pretty much anything other than Aurors. In this one, Harry is an artist/photographer and Draco is an up-and-coming rock star. The music and art, the creativity is important in this fic, but it also really looks at Draco’s recovery after the war in ways I haven’t read since, and I’m also a sucker for our favorite characters actually addressing and recovering from their trauma. 

Boom Clap (The Sound of My Heart) by @femmequixotic and noeon (noe)

This fic takes the Eighth Year trope to the next level. Draco, Harry, Hermione, and some other faves are teaching fellows at Hogwarts. Junior professors, kind of. It read like if the HP crew went to college. And, of course, Draco and Harry fall in love along the way, but not without much angst and obliviousness. I really enjoy the Draco POV in this. His worries and anxieties feel so real for that stage in his life, but amped up because of the past. This was one I read, never forgot, and then had to go back and find so i could read it again.

So, those are my top 10, but there is lots of other good Drarry out there--both from these authors and all the others in the ship and the fandom. Thanks for all the writing you guys do.

Oh, and tagging @virtual-insomnia, but only because she said she might want to make some quarantine fic lists of her own. :-)

[junhaoshua]

my ode to fandom

2020, the start of a new decade, is ending. 2021, the start of my adulthood, is beginning. I’ve always wanted to do a post about my fandom journey, and I’ve also decided to change my url starting next year: from the old faithful @moonlightmasquerade to a url for my new fandom, @junhaoshua. So before taking such a huge step, this felt like a perfect time to thank all the media that has shaped me as a person throughout my journey of youth.

This is half-chronological, half-remembered. This isn't comprehensive, because it doesn't have to be to be meaningful. It can't list every single fandom that has made its mark on me, because there are too many to count. 

This is about many people’s stories, including my own. This is about love and power and growing up and changing. This is about how transformative work can transform lives. 

To fandom: this is my ode to you.

To Frozen, the fandom that was my first love: thank you for being the place I discovered fanfic. Thank you for teaching me that it was okay to be myself. For teaching me that my parents could make mistakes when raising me even though they love me. For showing me that villains can be redeemed. 

To MLP, the fandom of my early teens and beyond: thank you for being such a big part of my life. Fallout Equestria, making me realise the impact of war and giving me hope that people can heal from the worst, that we can make a difference in the darkness. The Immortal Game, telling me that trauma can be overcome and my fate is in my hands. Hard Reset, teaching me to persevere despite the odds. Turnabout Storm, introducing me to the franchise that would inspire my future career. Freeport Venture, guiding me as I grew into my own person. These are lessons that kept me going throughout the rough years. Thank you for teaching me to write magic systems and epic fight scenes. Thank you for giving me hope that one day, even a shy bookworm like me would find my friends. 

To Wicked, the fandom of my tumultuous years: thank you for teaching me that I could be beautiful and loved no matter how I look. For opening my eyes to the cowardice of people. For helping me to understand why injustice can thrive. For telling me that sometimes you lose your best friend but you don't stop loving them. Thank you for preparing me to face all this in real life. 

To Star Wars, the fandom I was “born” into: thank you for creating a world that inspires writers. For the trilogies and the beautiful fics that were born from them. For the flaws in canon that made fans want to fix them, and write wonderful stories. Double Agent Vader and the questions of agency and power and justice and the need for righteous indignation. Reylo fics and redemption and atonement and forgiveness. The sequel trilogy stories, too many to count, about finding your family and being your own person and healing from trauma.

To Marvel, the fandom that has brought me comfort for years: thank you for starting a franchise that lasted me throughout my childhood. For the stories of X-Men and being ostracised for being born different. For the ideas of Avengers Tower and the Defenders and Spider-verses and other teams, which may not have been well handled in canon, but which inspired so many stories about dangerous people coming together and being accepted for who they are. For Daredevil and making me decide that yes I’m going to be a lawyer and no my disability will not stop me. 

To DC, the fandom I grew up in: thank you for the DCAU that I spent hours watching as a child. Thank you for inspiring so many amazing, creative people to write. Batfamily fics and the stories of well-meaning Dad Bruce who screws up despite his best efforts. Babs Gordon and being a total badass from her wheelchair. bricklaying and its discussion of power and class issues and trauma and identity, a story that I go back to time and time again. 

To Hamilton, the fandom that inspired me: thank you for introducing me to the wonderful genre of rap and hip-hop. For helping me to realise that there are villains, there are people who make mistakes, and there are people who exploit others’ mistakes. For awakening a fire and ambition in me that I had long tried to douse to try to fit in and be more likable, and telling me it was okay to be young scrappy and hungry. And for reminding me that the people I love are important, too.

And now, to the grand prizes, to the fandoms that have been the biggest part of my life.

To Harry Potter, the fandom I first participated in: thank you for opening my mind and broadening my horizons. For helping me to move past my conservative upbringing and my prejudices (the thanks is all to the fandom, not to canon). For helping me to find my first fandom family, my best friends @reapersbarge and @a-symphony-in-vellichor. For being full of stories about healing just when I needed it. For Dramione, a ship that would lead to me publishing my very first fanfiction, inspired by the wonderful @colubrina. For Drarry and my second fic that gave me the chance to tell a story with my best friend and the other half of my brain. Without HP, without these friends, I would never have found the courage or inspiration to finally finish and publish my stories.

To Six of Crows, the fandom I grew in: thank you for being my first experience with representation in stories. For opening my eyes to the world of YA novels and so many wonderful, amazing stories. (SoC was literally one of the first YA novels I ever read and I wouldn’t have gotten into bookblr without it). For helping me learn how to work with an ensemble cast of characters that all got a chance to shine. For inspiring me to come back from my long writing hiatus and rediscover the joy of being an author. 

To Taylor Swift and Marina, my two favourite solo artists: thank you for music that perfectly fits whatever I’m going through. Thank you for reputation and Electra Heart when I was hurt and angry and trying to build a shield to hide my scars. Thank you for Lover and Froot when I was trying to learn to be happy again, to conceal my hurt with a smile. Thank you for folklore and evermore and Love + Fear when I was finally ready to unbandage my scars and confront everything that I had faced and declare that it did not break me.

To Seventeen, my biggest current fandom: thank you for bringing me joy during this tough year. For always giving me something to look forward to every Monday when the days passed in a blur. For the new friends I’ve met here who welcomed me to caratblr, especially @soonhoonsol, @thekidultlife, @haosvteen, @myunqho, @xuseokgyu and @haoranghae. For reminding me what it feels like to fall deeply into a new fandom for the first time. For the amazing fics and gifs that always bless my dash (there may be another, separate post on that). For awakening my desire to write fic again after a long drought where I couldn’t think of a single thing, and giving me more plot bunnies than I know what to do with. Thank you for being a safe space that helped me to grow and heal and smile again.

To conclude this story:

Throughout my journey, I’ve seen the same threads and themes over and over again. To be my own person and not the person that others moulded me into. To be ambitious and hungry and the hero of my own story. To find my own family, to choose the people I claim as my own. To see injustice and apathy and evil and hopelessness, and to be angry and stand up against it. To believe that people can change, can atone for what they’ve done, can be redeemed. To believe in the power of hope and light against the darkness. 

Fandom is a part of my life that I truly can’t imagine being without. It has been the lifebuoy when I was stuck in trauma and unable to escape. The bandage when I was broken and bleeding and despondent. The glue to put me back together when I shattered into a million sharp-edged pieces. The armor when all I wanted to do was rip out my feelings and put up stone walls around myself. The candle that guided me through the night until I was ready to step into the daylight. 

For the fandoms of my past: I may have become less active, less involved, but I still return to the songs and stories that have been an integral part of my youth. I see them now with older, wiser eyes, and recognise bits and pieces of my personality that I absorbed from them. I’ve never truly left a fandom; how can you leave something when it’s part of you?

For the fandoms of my present: I want to live in the moment and enjoy my experiences for as long as I can, even if I’ll outgrow them one day. I know that even if I move on from them one day, I’ll always treasure the lessons learnt and the memories made, and they’ll have a special place in my heart no matter what.

I believe in the power of stories, of movies, of music, of fandom. I would not be who I am today without it. Every fandom I’ve been in has left an impression on who I am, made its mark on me, a golden tattoo. I can look at them and trace the way each and every one has shaped me into the person I am today. 

And as I hover in the in-between of childhood and adulthood, as I stand now a kidult, I’ll embark on this new phase of life with all the lessons that fandom has taught me, and will continue to teach me for many years to come.