#i think maybe I’m just a bad person | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

beemintty · 3 months ago

Text

am i a bomb?

8 notes · View notes

adhdandcomics · 4 months ago

Text

perhaps the most important question i’ve ever asked:

does anyone have tips for people trying to stop being chronically late to everything in the world that aren’t weirdly judgmental and aggressive or flat out lies

#when i tell you every single resource i’ve ever found or tried to get through or anyone i’ve ever asked #has been just so. mean about it #not even intentionally #not always at least #but there’s so much inherent shame tied to being late to things or being a person who used to be late to things #that i don’t think people can untie that from their ‘helpful tips’#it’s all ‘i used to also be a lazy uncaring piece of shit! you don’t have to be a horrible wretched loser anymore!’ and it’s like. okay.#you see how that’s not helping. right.#making me feel worse about it is NEVER helpful. i promise you i already have tortured myself over it FARRR more than any ‘on time’ person #ever had #this has been a comic i’ve been stewing on for ages as well but. well there’s of course the shame #idk it’s something that people are always despicably mean about bc fundamentally people who have never struggled with it #see it as a personal choice to be late #and as something one needs to just ‘try harder’ to fix. and that if you don’t #you inherently don’t care about other people’s time or even other people in general #and that feels horrible! it feels really bad!!#i mean i’ve got it from EVERYONE. disability allies. other adhd folks. disability resource offices #it’s something that nobody ever cares to acknowledge or try to accommodate for #bc time blindness and exec dysfunction are NEVER taken seriously as disabilities. they’re always always viewed as a personal failing #and i’m sick and tired of it. bc all this does is make people struggling with this Hate themselves #and worry endlessly that maybe they Are selfish and actually Don’t care about anyone else #there’s a bit too much here to keep in the tags i should really do the comic for adhd awareness month

397 notes · View notes

aesdi · 3 months ago

Text

the tragedy of James and Mary Sunderland is one of the most heartbreaking and (most importantly) human stories I’ve ever had the joy in witnessing

#they are just two amazingly complex characters #especially James but that’s mostly cause he’s the protagonist #and maybe because I’ve experienced and witnessed the burnout that comes with being a caregiver to someone but it’s just so human to me #and then the guilt you feel when that person passes (even if the circumstances were different) it hits hard #I’m also frustrated that James gets boiled down to the guy who killed his wife #the whole game is exploring WHY he did that and how much he regrets it #and how good people can do bad things #there’s no black and white to sh2 it’s all foggy shades of grey #sorry about the tangent in my own tags #i just think James is neat #like a bug under a microscope #james sunderland #mary shepherd sunderland #silent hill 2 #silent hill 2 remake #silent hill

296 notes · View notes

artsymeeshee · 6 months ago

Text

one of those nights

#small vent #lately I’ve been questioning things a lot #and this overwhelming feeling of being lonely takes over #and I question myself and my feelings and thoughts on certain things #sometimes i end up thinking im a bad person #the guilt i feel because I don’t do ship art gets overwhelming sometimes #and i end up feeling like an asshole because of it #but I genuinely just can’t (at least not for the gf fandom)#family and platonic moments are just way too important to me #which might explain a small desire wanting to have that but unable to #maybe it’s the aroaceness in me idk #it just gets really lonely sometimes in your own corner #i’m sorry #I know things like this can be annoying but I needed to vent #some more light-hearted things hopefully soon #delete later

287 notes · View notes

thechosenthree · 2 months ago

Text

#natalie scatorccio #shauna shipman #shaunanat #shorccio #jackienat #taylorccio #jackieshauna #shackie #jackieshaunanat #shauna x nat #jackie x nat #jackie x shauna #yellowjackets #*#i’m obsessed with this moment. earlier in the episode we see nat sitting outside just staring at jackie’s bones. she’s clearly been thinkin #this over. that they can’t just leave her there. a visual reminder of what they did. making them all feel sick #that jackie deserved better. that in death. even now that she’s just bones. she deserves a burial or something. and nat takes initiative.#comes up with a plan and shares it with the group. but even then she looks to shauna for permission or maybe reassurance? maybe it’s out of #respect. they all remember how shauna reacted when it was initially suggested they get rid of jackie’s body. this is hard on all of them #jackie’s death and what they did. but they all know it’s affecting shauna the most.#maybe nat is even hoping shauna will want to help or that someone else besides natalie is feeling the way she is. that she won’t have to do #this alone. that someone else wants to honor jackie or feels as sick as she does about it. and they clearly do!! so many of them feel that.#i mean maybe only shauna and taissa are feeling it as strongly as she does? but shauna is kind of in shock and sick with guilt and grief an #in no place to meet nat half way here. she’s retreating into herself. and tai doesn’t even remember eating jackie. think she’s still #processing that it even happened. that they all aren’t lying to her. and also dealing with the knowledge that she’s having memory gaps.#dissociating. so nobody that is present there with natalie is feeling the way she is. lottie seems to think it was necessary for their #survival (probably true and nat even tells jackie’s bones as much.) but lottie doesn’t seem to be feeling guilty and when she takes a mug #out to natalie while she’s wrapping the bones. nat seems angry at the way lottie is handling it. and travis offers to go with her but it #reads to me like he is worried about nat specifically and not that he’s feeling that bad about what happened. i think nat is just feeling s #alone in this episode. and the one person that gets that is shauna but she’s just not in an actionable state. just tells nat to take the

75 notes · View notes

cruel-hiraeth · 1 month ago

Text

part of jing yuan’s irresistible allure—in the bedroom, particularly—is how versatile he is. some may interpret his flexibility as boredom or laziness, both of which are far from the truth; in reality, he has simply sated the sexual curiosities of his youth, so is repertoire is vast. what he craves more than anything in the cosmos is intimacy and connection, which is exactly what you give him. and his open approach allows you room to explore your deepest desires without judgement—so long as you can clearly voice said desires (he is a scoundrel, after all).

#i have a few scenarios in mind where you’re embarrassed to ask him to do something #but there’s never anything to be embarrassed about #he may tease you for not being straightforward #but he would never judge you or make you feel bad for your kinks/fetishes/fantasies/etc.#i’m sure he has subtle preferences but idk i truly truly believe that he’s so accommodating #it just…clicks with his personality and circumstances #and maybe it’s the romantic sap within me but. i see him being most turned on by love and devotion rather than specific acts #he has seen so many people live and die…#(in my mind anyway)#so meeting His Person (whether you are a long-lived species or not) is kind of enough to get him going LOL #which now that i think of it is very soft yan but i see him as an indulgent king #— musings #— jing yuan #— honkai star rail

57 notes · View notes

itspileofgoodthings · 7 days ago

Text

.

#if you don’t mind could you say a quick prayer that I can not make things worse with my seniors?#I do feel very much that the problem is me (hi! I’m the problem it’s me)#because they’re just suuuuuch a hard personality match for me as a group #but I can feel myself sort of closing off and not wanting to stay open and I can feel myself wanting to hate them #frankly #but that’s just because I’m imperfect and tired #I am forcing myself to go through the class and think about each kid #and actually there is only really one bad apple maybe two but really I think it’s one!#but it is casting a huge shadow #also I hate to say it but many are annoying #aosiieksisie they just are. but they’re not bad kids! and they want to have a good relationship with me and I need to let that happen #but yeah. I just want to shut myself off from them completely #but I am either not old enough to teach a class well and do that. I have not unlocked that power #there has to be a baseline of goodwill and camaraderie #or I will never be able to not have it and will always need it #but in either case. I need it here. and it’s hard #the worst part is that they ! make ! me ! shy !#freaking introverts are so annoying sometimes I swear #YOU DON’t HAVE A MONOPOLY ON DISCOMFORT IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS #and you CREATE it as well as suffer it !!!!!!!!!!!!#sorry. see what I mean? I am getting irrationally angry at them for being the way that they are #but it’s because *I* am suffering because of them #lol. except it isn’t lol I am serious #anyway just trying to get this out #thanks for listening #teaching tag

26 notes · View notes

feanorianethicsdepartment · 17 days ago

Text

like, refusing to put your grudges on hold in order to defeat actual satan is itself an act of pride, i think

#notes from management #do not have the energy to pick a fight on that post so i’m just venting here #like. people other than the feanorians are allowed to make mistakes #the tragedy is that *no one* will look beyond their personal grudges to do something about actual literal satan #not just ‘oh the feanorians are bad and they screwed it all up all by themselves’#i also. really don’t like the idea that they should have just rolled over and waited for the valar to save them #while morgoth ravaged their lands #at a point in the story where the valar are perfectly happy to ignore everything that’s happening in beleriand #i also don’t think ‘if two people can break into morgoth’s and steal a silmaril maybe an army can take him out for good’#is an inherently racist idea

42 notes · View notes

julykings · 8 days ago

Text

how r u today??

#I’m okayyy I think my hormones are off tho bc I’m ********#so that feels bad umm..#just working on a commission today and maybe later making dinner with my bf :-)#called out of work bc I’m evil. but actually I’m just in pain and not rlly evil #personal

49 notes · View notes

hplonesomeart · 2 months ago

Text

Hey. Sorry about the inactivity, but pretty sure no one cared that much anyways lol. Been a looooong time since I kept that distant from Tumblr…at least now I know I’m able to survive without checking posts every day/being chronically online! I’ve got an intense love-hate relationship with this lifestyle I’ve dug myself into. Think I’m getting a little bit better with the balance even if school isn’t really giving me an option. Got a load of work I need to keep catching up on if I don’t want to disappoint my professors. We’ll survive somehow. Here take a quick batch of Puzzle doodles k bye

#the hell am I so anxious about? maybe it’s just overstimulation stuff #hoping it’ll die down because I can’t keep enjoying myself when I’m like this #seriously is starting to mess with my flight responses over the tiniest things #like yea obviously I needed to stay logged out of Tumblr so I would focus more on schoolwork #but uhhhh gonna be transparent and say a huge part of it is the jolts of anxiety :(#like even the thought of logging back here has caused me to feel like sweating #my brain kept saying ‘no I don’t want to I can’t do that’ even when I felt bad for missing out on others posts #like I want to be here so I can support my mutuals dammit!!!#I’m a mess. I’m such a broken mess oh great lovely spectacular #maybe the culminating stress of final exam deadlines is worsening stuff as well #I can’t tell you why I’m like this I just am 🙃#anyways thinking I’ll start adapting to the distance. Sorry but being a shut-in is more appealing right now #I just need time to be with myself and not be so invested in the lives of others #anyways what’s something mildly positive I can wrap this up with so I don’t seem pathetic….#ah yes the final Puzzle sketch here was drawn today before a class period #one of my fellow classmates noticed and audibly asked me ‘is that Mr. Puzzles?’#IT TOOK EVERTHING IN MY WILLPOWER TO NOT LET OUT A GIDDY SHRIEK #Felt like my eyes bulged and I jolted in enthusiasm jskjsksp spontaneous happiness?? actally experiencing the feeling of fitting in??#anyways I responded with a very normal ‘WAIT YOU KNOW ABOUT HIM???’ while trying to suppress grinning or going ‘teehee’#anyways now it’s my personal mission to keep initiating conversations with her because AUUUUUGH SHE KNOWS WHO HE IS I’M LOSING IT #proceeded to talk about Murder Drones & TADC like holy SHIT I didn’t think I would ever find animation peeps in my psychology class auuu 😭💜#it’s a MIRACLE man this may be a sign that college won’t be isolating anymore yaaaaayyy #PUZZLE IS SINGLE HANDILY HELPING ME TALK TO PEOPLE BOTH ONLINE AND IRL THIS IS WILD #all hail the best comfort character seriously holy shit—like imagine she never noticed me drawing Puzzles!! I’D STILL BE LONELY AS HELL #okay sorry I’ll stop typing like a teenager and go back to pretending to be well-versed in speech & conducting myself ‘normally’ :3 #doodles #sketches #hplonesome art #not tagging with Puzzles because hahaaaaa don’t look at me

30 notes · View notes

angelic-waffles · 3 months ago

Text

As a guy who’s pretty fuckin mentally ill and has some occasional violent urges from it, I really really love the found family creepypasta he’s cannons

Best way I can explain it is that most of the time I feel like a monster due to mental conditions and intense intrusive thoughts. So because of that, seeing characters who have similar problems (obviously acted upon which, no I wouldn’t k!ll someone but you know what I mean) and who are able to find others like them, becoming close and realizing your problems don’t rob you of you humanity??? Ough I could die happy

#idk I’m BPD and projecting probably #but this really just makes me feel so seen as just someone who society has called a monster for things I didn’t choose and can’t control #I still remember when I first talked to someone who related about my BPD and intrusive thoughts #after years of thinking I was some villain who deserved to be punished #years of thinking I was the only one #my friend talked about having similar problems. It was such an impactful moment to finally realize someone like me was out there and they #weren’t a bad person. Not at all. And I realized maybe if they were amazing despite this- maybe I wasn’t a monster #creepypasta #creepypasta fandom #crp #crp fandom

34 notes · View notes

snowflake-sage · 3 months ago

Text

Pretty proud of how far I’ve come this year

#I have struggled with crippling anxiety for a long time and this year I really wanted to overcome it and become more independent #like #I used to be absolutely terrified of leaving the house #things like driving and going places alone would make me have crazy panic attacks #but this year I’ve done a lot and I’ve overcome a lot and gained so much confidence #I’ve flown across the country twice this year #driven on some pretty intimidating roads like the highway and freeway #gone on solo bike rides for miles through the woods #eaten tons of new foods #I know those sorts of things might seem very simple and normal everyday things #but I have ocd and it can make my anxiety pretty bad #it can also make a lot of my fears rather irrational #likes like trying new foods and going new places are genuinely intimidating for me #bc it makes me feel like I’m going to die lol #but I’ve done ALOT of things I was scared to do #I’ve come along way #and it may seem like boring basic stuff to some people #but considering I couldn’t leave my house two years ago without panicking to the point of losing feeling in my hands and feet #I think I did pretty good lol #I’m starting to feel like a confident person again #I’m starting to feel like I can LIVE again #and it’s pretty nice #just wanted to write this out somewhere lol that’s all #maybe it will be helpful for anyone struggling in similar ways #to see that improvement is possible #lol anyways happy November #mae rambles

40 notes · View notes

shorthaltsjester · 3 months ago

Text

people talking about how it’s because they didn’t know if they’d get a s4 that they pulled punches in the s3 finale of tlovm…. you get that that’s still shitty right. you get that that’s them openly stating they chose a weaker narrative beat in the story they’d like to create in case it ends up being a story that’s cut short. like. it Is incredibly rough out there for shows on streaming rn don’t get me wrong i know that but. i don’t know that the answer is “let’s write something narratively weaker but more satisfying if we get cancelled”

#sometimes these guys gotta just. stop talking in these round table things. openly flaunting that the writing is not good.#and i say this as a Bad writer. i’m not saying don’t create things like #things can be bad and loved and worth making #but oh boy. ‘we didn’t know this characters arc until we’d written the whole season and we went back and rewrote everything’#idk if that’s how that works in an Ensemble show.#if you can rewrite the scenes for One character and think it won’t effect the rest of the characters. maybe you’re not doing ensemble well #this is a separate but related issue alas.#my point is i think tlovm’s writing is it’s weakest point by far. and as a character arcs first person. that makes it rough out here for me #tlovm

20 notes · View notes

magpie-trove · 3 days ago

Text

🌸

#ok I’ve been asked for advice and I’m outsourcing (soliciting my mutuals opinions)#so the question is if one has a friend in whose company one is sometimes led to thinking something not ok is ok #ie such as gossip #because the friend doesn’t really think it’s that bad #because while the friend is someone say of faith like you maybe it’s something they struggle with for good reason or they just aren’t as #mature yet #but you’ve been good friends for a while #should you a. distance yourself from the friend to avoid temptation which however feels like abandoning them to their struggles #or b. stay friends even if it risks temptation for you #personally my answer so far was something along the lines of since neither of those are good options the real answer must be the good option #we don’t see yet #and that it may involve being a friend by gently standing against them (a la best form Clark and Alex)#*lex #or else doing like Prince Charming ouat and Jesus #seeing the person sending an arrow out (something bad) and opposing it by stepping in front of the arrow so they don’t lose themselves to #sin. however. I don’t know what that looks like translated into like normal life and not arrows #obviously praying for the person #but yeah. idk this one. hits at a core struggle for me (don’t ever ever ever want to give up on people or abandon them)

16 notes · View notes

calamitydaze · 2 years ago

Text

tbh “people hear about legitimate dream fuckups and it colors their worldview to exaggerate and misconstrue harm in everything he does” is just the opposite side of the coin to “fans hear about dream being legitimately fucked over and treated badly and it raises their defenses to react to every perceived slight like a personal betrayal” literally nobody is capable of being normal about that man

#bella talks #while the former is worse on twitter i think the latter is worse here #because we’re so close knit and self contained so one person getting (maybe reasonably) upset about something #can spiral into the whole dash dooming #and i’m not saying it’s never warranted— while the q hate spiraled a little out of control i think it was mostly proportional #but then we also get things like karl dropping the panel #(in fairness from what *i* saw it wasn’t as bad as how i see people acting but maybe my dash is just well curated #and i have a higher tolerance for d.tblr shenanigans than most people i think)#like i really don’t mind if people get a little rowdy LMAO it doesn’t bother me but it does make the overall environment more toxic

235 notes · View notes

whitmore · 1 year ago

Text

listen this may be a hot take that’s okay i’m fine with that i just feel that the @everyone main tag fandom vagueposts about sending admins hate and/or targeting ccs is . abyssal nonsense to post to tumblr. like you’re not wrong im not disagreeing with any of you— it just feels fruitless to post that on a website where none of us have direct contact with any admins or creators. if you see it in the main or side tags feel free to call it out, i think we should be doing that, but like the aimless vagueposting is not only reductive but directly adding to the negativity you’re trying to combat

#eleanor.txt #qsmp #i feel bad for even putting this in main tag but it’s like. at the same time i do want the tag to be a nice space #correct me if i’m wrong and there’s admins that are being targeted here but like. idk post ur post on twitter maybe #and this isn’t me trying to excuse qsmpblr we have issues of our own just. those aren’t our issues i don’t think #plus maybe my blocklist just works real well but i personally don’t see any excessive hate or negativity or anything #willing to be wrong on this one maybe we really need the callout or something idk. did we do something #this isn’t even discourse this is just blogging and it also feels like nobody knows the difference here. THATS one of our real issues

117 notes · View notes