#this alone. that someone else wants to honor jackie or feels as sick as she does about it. and they clearly do!! so many of them feel that.

[thechosenthree]

[elianamarie-blog]

The Things You Give Pt 13

AN: Another part is up! Let me know what you’re thinking of the series so far because I’m thinking of ending it soon because I’d hate for it to go on longer than needed. But I am having a lot of fun writing it and love hearing back from you guys! Thank you all for those that have been reading since the beginning and if you’re just finding the series, welcome! Enjoy!

Steven Hyde x Reader

October 15, 1978

The Forman Kitchen

Point Place, Wisconsin           

The morning at the breakfast table, things still hadn’t changed between the three teenagers, but they were at least able to be around each other without fists flying, so y/n took that as a plus. Y/n could barley eat though. She had woken up feeling sick to her stomach; the thought of food repulsing her. She nibbled on her toast and couldn’t even sip on her orange juice without wanting to vomit.             

“Y/n, are you okay?” Kitty asked concerned. “You’ve barley touched your breakfast.”          

Y/n groaned. “Just feeling a little sick is all.”            

Kitty hummed and pressed the back of her hand to y/n’s forehead. “You don’t feel warm. Maybe it was something you ate.”            

Y/n groaned again and put her head down. “Maybe.”           

 “Hey Dad, can you pass the bacon?” Eric asked, stretching arm out.            

Y/n gagged and groaned. “Please don’t say bacon.”           

 Eric smirked and grabbed a piece, biting into it. “Mhmmmm…bacόn.”           

 “Please stop,” she grumbled, her stomach churning.            

“It’s so juicy and chewy and the fat at the end is the best part,” Eric continued, laughing.            

“Oh, God! Did you have to say that?!” she screeched as she made haste to the nearest bathroom. She could feel the contents of her stomach rising before she made it to the bathroom.            

“Did you really have to do that?” Kitty asked, disappointed.             

“Yes,” Eric responded. “Yes, I did.”            

Kitty shook her head in disapproval and brought her fork of food to her mouth.            

Red glared at his son before returning his attention to the newspaper.            

“What?!” Eric asked. “She started it!”            

“Oh, boo hoo, she broke your dolls,” Red mocked.           

 “G.I Joes,” Eric corrected.           

 “Whatever,” his father answered. “Whatever she did isn’t worth making her throw up over.”            

Yes, it is, Eric thought.            

Y/n returned to the kitchen, her skin ashen and her eyes sunken. “I think I’m going to go back to bed so I don’t barf all over the table.”            

“Well, okay honey,” Kitty said getting up and taking her plate to the sink. “I’ll bring you some soup later, okay?”            

Y/n shook her head, making a face of disgust. “Please, Mom. I can’t even think about food right now.”           

 “Well, you have to get some food in you,” Kitty responded. “Otherwise you’ll get even more sick.”            

Y/n nodded. “Okay. I just really want to go back to bed.”            

“Okay sweetie,” Kitty responded, rubbing her daughter’s shoulder. “We’ll see you later.”            

Y/n nodded and stole a glance at Hyde before she made her way upstairs.         

“Eric, I need you to mow the lawn later,” Red demanded as he finished his breakfast.            

“What? Why can’t Hyde do it?”            

“Because unlike your sorry ass, I actually have work,” Hyde replied.           

 Eric glared at him before turning back to Red. “Why do I always have to do it?”           

 “Because I said so!” Red barked.                                                 

                                                   --Time Skip—           

 “So, you think you got food poisoning, huh?” Donna asked that night over the phone.             

Y/n nodded before she realized she was talking over the phone. “Yeah, I do. Every time I move, my body screams at me. My back is hurting so much. And my stupid cramps aren’t helping any either.”           

 “Have you been throwing up that much?”            

“Yeah,” Y/n replied, wiping her sweaty and oily hair out of her face. “I think I pulled a muscle in my back or something because of it. Even my boobs hurt.”    

  “Nausea, back aches, and tender breasts,” Donna counted off. “Hey, you may be pregnant.” Donna chuckled at her own joke.           

 “Ha ha,” Y/n chortled. “You’re funny. Definitely not pregnant.”           

 “Yeah? And how do you know?”            

“Because I’m supposed to be getting my period in a few days. These could be symptoms of PMS. Or maybe both.”            

“Supposed to,” Donna pushed, putting emphasis on her words.            

“Shut up,” Elena laughed. “Stop saying that. I’m not pregnant. Eric would throw himself off a cliff if that happened. Or Hyde. Or Eric would push Hyde off a cliff. One of the three.”          

  Donna chuckled. “But seriously, are you alright?”            

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just can’t do much for a couple of days.”            

“Okay, well if you need anything, you know where to find me.”            

“Thanks Donna,” Y/n said. “I’m going to go to sleep. I’ll talk to you later.”            “Alright, rest easy. Talk to you later.”            

Y/n hung up the phone before turning back around and falling back asleep, feeling her stomach churning. Pregnant.            

The word echoed in her head as sleep quickly enveloped her.                                                                             --Time Skip—           

 “Guys!” Kelso called as he barged through the door in the basement. “The Omen is on TV right now!” He hurriedly made his way over to the television set, switching on the movie.           

 “Kelso, what the hell, man? We were watching that!” Hyde piped up.            “C’mon, it’s Halloween season!” Kelso argued. “Tis the season to be jolly!”            

“That’s Christmas, moron,” Jackie said from behind him.           

 “Well, whatever! I think we should get in the spirit.”            

The gang groaned as they leaned back into their seats.           

 “Hey, where’s y/n?” Hyde asked.            

“Oh, she’s upstairs sleeping,” Donna answered nonchalantly.            

“Still? It’s six o’ clock,” he responded. “She’s been upstairs since this morning.”    

“Well, food poisoning is a real bitch,” she replied. “And so is PMS.”           

 “Alright, TMI,” Eric said and got up to turn up the volume on the TV.            

“Oh, Eric, don’t be such a prude,” Fez said. “It’s completely natural. In my culture, we honor women whenever they go through their monthly ordeal. It’s kind of a big deal. We thank the gods and celebrate their womanhood. Then, we bring them flowers and chocolates and some candy too. Or whatever else they’re craving. They get a week off and can stay at home in bed while their husbands, brothers, fathers, or sons take care of everything.”            

“Wow…can I join your culture?” Donna asked.          

  Fez chuckled. “Sure, if you feel like eating bugs for breakfast.”            

Donna grimaced. “Never mind.” She turned to Eric. “Why don’t you do that for me?”            

“Because a woman shouldn’t bleed for seven days straight and still live,” he deadpanned.           

 “Yeah, I don’t trust anything that can bleed for that long and not die,” Kelso said.            

Hyde looked at him amused. “You can’t even be with a woman for seven days straight, let alone be there for her during her monthly problem.”           

 “Not true! I was with Jackie for three years!”           

 “And you cheated on me at least once a month!” Jackie responded. “Hey…wait a minute!”           

 “You guys, women are sacred. They need to be honored and cherished during this time because the pain they go through, we will never understand,” Fez said gently.            

 “We don’t understand?” Hyde said. “Have you ever been kicked in the nads?”            

“Okay, sure, but imagine getting kicked in the nads for at least 3 days straight,” Donna responded.             

“Oh, God!” Eric said, squirming in his seat. “I can’t even imagine that!”            

“Well, sometimes, it’s even more painful,” Jackie added.             

“What does it feel like?” Kelso asked, staring at her.            

“Well, it can feel like someone is taking a knife to your pelvis and slowly twisting it,” Jackie responded causing all the men in the room to squirm, except for Fez.            

“Fez, man, how are you not effected by this?” Kelso asked.            

“I grew up with five sisters,” he responded, shrugging. “Nothing I’m not used to.”            

“Are you guys seriously talking about periods?” Y/n asked as she slowly made her way down the stairs.            

“Hey, you’re up,” Donna stated. “How are you feeling?”            

“Pretty lousy,” Y/n said. “But I’d rather be miserable with company than go through it alone.” She plopped down on the couch next to where Hyde was sitting.            

“Are you going through your…girl problem?” Kelso asked nervously.            

“What? No,” Y/n replied. “I mean, I could be, but it could also be food poisoning.”           

 “Well, what did you eat?” Hyde asked.            

“Nothing out of the ordinary and nothing that you guys didn’t eat,” she replied.           

 “Must be the PMS thing then,” Donna said, laughing when Eric shifted uncomfortably in his seat.           

 “Can we please stop talking about my sister’s cycle? It’s giving me a very vivid image that I’d rather not have.”            

“Y/n, do you need anything?” Fez asked sweetly. “Chocolate? Water? A hot water bottle?”            

Y/n smiled at him. “Why, yes, Fez. That would be lovely.”           

 “Okay, I’ll be right back!” Fez beamed and hopped out the chair to run out the door.           

 “Hey, man, why are you taking care of my chick?” Hyde asked, stopping Fez at the door. “That’s my job.”           

 “Then why aren’t you doing it?” Fez shot back.            

Y/n’s mouth fell open in a laugh as she covered it with her hand. Donna and Jackie tightened their lips to keep themselves for laughing.            

“’Cause she didn’t ask,” he responded.            

“She shouldn’t have to,” Fez said calmly. “You should just do it for her. That’s how you keep your woman happy.”            

“Then why couldn’t you keep Jackie happy?” Hyde quipped.            

Y/n gasped. “Steven!”            

“No, no it’s okay,” Fez said, oddly calm. “You know, Hyde, normally that would bother me, but not today because I’m not the one having another man making my woman happy.”            

Hyde grabbed the nearest object—a magazine—and threw it at Fez, but before it could hit him, he slammed the door shut; the magazine hitting the door with a thud.            

 “He’s right, you know,” Y/n responded with a smile.            

“Do you really feel that way?” Hyde asked her.            

Y/n shrugged. “Not really. It would be nice though.”            

“I see,” Hyde said and stood from his chair, stalking his way to his room.           

 “Steven, wait!” she called after him. “I wasn’t being serious!”            

He flapped a hand at her without turning to look at her and slammed his door.            

“Wow,” Jackie said, puffing out her cheeks. “That escaladed quickly.”           

Y/n shrunk down in her seat, feeling guilty. “What else is new with this group?” 

 “This is great!” Eric beamed, causing everyone to stare at him in confusion. “Now Hyde is mad at you too! Not just me.”           

 Y/n groaned and stood up slowly. “You’re an immature dillhole. I’m going back to bed.”           

 “What should I tell Fez when he gets back?” Donna asked.           

 “That I’m upstairs and he can come up.”           

 “I don’t think Hyde will like that very much,” Kelso mentioned.            

“Who cares?” Eric griped.           

 “Look, I’ll deal with Hyde later,” Y/n responded, ignoring her twin. “Right now, I just want to feel better.” She trudged up the stairs, leaving the group alone.           

 “What a mess,” Donna said.          

  “Tell me about it,” Jackie responded. “Eric, are you still mad at them?”           

 “Of course, I am!” he responded, surprised that Jackie would ask him such a question. “How can I not be?”           

 “Well, you can try not being mad,” Jackie suggested sarcastically.            

 “Eric, give it a rest, yeah?” Donna said. “It’s been over a week.”           

 Eric growled and leaned back in his seat.            

 “He was supposed to be moved out by now,” he mumbled.           

 “Shut. Up. Please,” Donna snapped. “He literally has nowhere to go. You have to be a real prick to throw him out on the streets. It’s not like he murdered your sister.”            

“You just don’t get it, Donna!” he whined. The whole group groaned.            

“Yeah, yeah, yeah we don’t get it because it’s not our sister and we would be pissed too if Hyde was nailing her, blah blah blah. Seriously, Eric, I’m sure I speak for all of us when I say we’re sick of hearing about it,” Kelso said, irritated. He just wanted to watch the movie. Why wasn’t anybody respecting that?            

Eric furrowed his brows at his friends. “You guys really feel this way?”            

“YES!” Jackie, Donna, and Kelso said in unison.           

 “Oh. Well, then, fine,” Eric grumbled and stood up.           

 “Where are you going?” Donna asked.           

 “Since you guys are tired of hearing about it, I’m going to go somewhere else.”           

 “Oh my God, you are such a drama queen,” Donna groaned. “Just sit back down and watch the movie with us.”            

“Nah, I’m good. See you guys later.” With that, he grabbed his coat and shut the door, leaving the three teenagers left to watch the movie.            

“He’s gotten more annoying than usual,” Jackie commented.            

“You know, Jackie, normally I would be offended by that, but this time I have to agree with you,” Donna responded.            

“Well, now we can watch the movie,” Kelso said.            

The three sat in silence on the couch until Kelso tried to sneak his hand up Donna’s leg.           

 “Kelso!” Donna screeched as she slapped his hand away.           

 “Damn, Donna! I was just looking for the remote!”           

 “The remote is on the table, you idiot,” Jackie pointed out.           

 Kelso looked between the two girls with a hurt look. “Women are mean!” He stomped out the basement, forgetting the movie.            

The girls looked at each other and shrugged, returning their attention to the TV before Donna got up to change it back to the channel they were watching.                                                

                                                 --Time Skip—            

Y/n stared down at the home pregnancy test, shock filling her. Positive. The test was freaking positive. She was going to be a mother. Oh God, how would everyone else react? What kind of mother was she going to be?           

 “Oh, Y/n, how could you?” Kitty asked from behind her, hurt playing on her face.    

“Wait, Mom--!” Y/n tried to call after her mother before Red showed up at her side.           

 “How could you be such a disgrace to the family?!” Red shouted, his face turning pink. Kitty turned to her husband’s side and started sobbing. “Look what you’re doing to your mother!”            

“No, but Daddy—” Y/n said, tears welling in her eyes.            

“Wow, you’re such a whore!” Eric laughed as he suddenly appeared by their parents’ side. “And here I thought Laurie would be the one to get knocked up from some rando.”            

“What?” she asked her twin, tears cascading down her pale cheeks.            

“Wow, little sister, you certainly top me,” Laurie said, smirking.            

“Laurie?” Y/n questioned.           

 “I’m leaving you,” Steven said coldly, appearing in front of her. “You were just a fling. You knew this from the start. I can’t have a baby with a loser.”           

 “You said you loved me!” Y/n screamed.          

  “I lied,” Steven said and smirked. “I only strung you along so that I could nail you. Now, look at you. You’re fat and alone.”            

Y/n looked down and saw that her stomach had enlarged. “What?” she whispered.           

 “We can’t have you in the family,” Kitty suddenly said. “We can’t have a whore in the family.”            

“You have Laurie!”           

 “At least she didn’t get pregnant!” her mother shot back. “You and your mistake can get out of our house, out of our lives. You’re no longer welcome!”            

“No, Mom! Please, I need you. I need Daddy and Steven, please. I can’t do this alone. I need you more than ever.”           

 She went to grab his hands, but he jerked away from her. “Well, you’re gonna have to do it alone.”            

Tears cascaded down her face as she tried to blink them away, but as quickly as they appeared, they disappeared. Suddenly, Y/n found herself sitting alone in a total darkness, a single light shining above her.           

 “No,” she whimpered, looking around. “No. No. NO!”            

Y/n jerked awake, sweat coating her forehead. Her breathing was slightly heavy as she glanced at the clock. 2:08AM. She sighed and fell back onto her pillow, fingers threading through her sweaty and knotted hair. She couldn’t believe she’d been asleep for eight hours.            

Her room suddenly flooded with light as Kitty, dressed in her pink robe, hair a rat’s nest, stood in her cracked door. “Y/n, honey, are you alright? I heard you yelling.”           

 “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” Y/n replied. “Just had a nightmare.”            

“Oh, honey, it’s okay,” Kitty replied and moved closer to adjust herself on the bed. “You know, when you were little, you would get nightmares all the time. And the only thing that would soothe you and get you to go back to sleep is when I would gently caress your hair until you fell back asleep.”            

Y/n smiled softly. “Too bad I’m older now, huh?”            

“Oh, nonsense,” Kitty said and leaned over, caressing her hair back. “You’re never too old for your mother’s love.”            

Y/n smiled and turned on her side, facing Kitty.            

“You wanna talk about it?” she asked her daughter after a moment of silence.            

Y/n thought about it for a minute. She actually wanted to talk to her about it, but she knew if she did, she could open up something that she really didn’t want to. Even if it were just a dream, Kitty would know that it was something much deeper than that.            

“No,” she responded after a beat. “I’m okay. Thank you, though.”          

  “Of course sweetheart,” Kitty cooed. She continued to smooth Y/n’s hair, effectively calming her down. Fifteen years later and it still works.           

 Y/n could already feel sleep overcoming her again. “Thank you, Mommy,” she mumbled as her eyelids grew heavier.            

“You’re absolutely welcome,” Kitty responded and leaned over to kiss her forehead. “I love you.”           

 “I love you too,” Y/n whispered before falling asleep once more.                                                                         

                                                 ⧝⧝⧝            

Y/n woke up the next day, just as horrible as the day before. She dragged herself out of bed and trudged downstairs to see her family eating lunch.            

“Morning Sunshine,” Kitty cheerfully greeted her. “You must be really sick to sleep in till noon.”            

Y/n grunted back and grabbed some orange juice and sat down. The smell of their lunch making her nose curl, repulsing her.           

 “How’re you feeling, kitten?” Red asked.            

“I’m okay,” Y/n responded. “Could be better. Still feel kinda nauseas and tired.”            

“You want some dry toast?” Kitty asked. “You haven’t eaten much.”           

Y/n nodded tiredly and put her head on the table. “I’d love some actually.”            

Kitty smiled and got up, popping bread in the toaster. “Oh, your foreign friend dropped off some stuff for you. I left it here on the counter.”            

“Hm?” Y/n hummed, looking at Kitty.            

“He said something to do with your menstrual cycle, so he dropped off a hot water bottle, some midol, and a box of chocolate.”           

 “Oh, come on, Kitty, not while we’re eating!” Red exclaimed, disgusted.           

 The whole time, Eric and Steven had been quiet. Steven glared at the gifts through his aviators. Eric rolled his eyes and continued to eat his lunch.            

“What a sweet boy!” Kitty laughed. “You know, I don’t think I’d mind if you ended up with him.”            

Y/n smiled as Kitty set a plate of two slices of dry toast in front of her.           

 “I’m going to make you some tea as well. You gotta get some liquids in you,” Kitty stated.           

 “Kitty, don’t put ideas in her head!” Red said, throwing down the paper he was reading.           

 “What do you mean by that?” Y/n asked, offended. “Is it because of his skin color?”            

“What?” Red asked, scrunching up his face. “God, no! I don’t want you dating anybody. You’re too young.”           

 “Dad, I’m eighteen,” Y/n deadpanned as she nibbled at her toast. “Eric and Donna have been dating since they were, like, eight.”            

“No, we haven’t,” Eric argued.            

 “Shut up, yes you have,” Y/n said.            

“Eric’s different,” Red continued. “Eric is a man, or as close of a man as he can get. Besides, Donna is the best he’s ever going to do.” He started laughing, but he was the only one who found that funny.           

 “Thanks Dad,” Eric deadpanned.            

“Red Forman!” Kitty exclaimed.            

“What? It’s funny!” Kitty gave him a hard look making him shut up. “Fine, it’s not.”            

Y/n managed a small smile before bringing a piece of toast to her lips. “Don’t worry, Dad. I’m not even seeing anyone.”            

Eric stopped mid-bite to give side eye to his twin sister. Y/n returned a hard, cold stare to her brother as if to say don’t you freaking dare.           

 “So, Fez gave you those huh?” Steven asked.            

“Yeah, I guess,” Y/n replied. “That was really nice of him.”           

 “Yeah, real nice,” he responded slowly.            

“It was,” Y/n replied, staring at her boyfriend in suspicion. “You got something to say?”           

 “No, why would I?” he responded. “Why would I have anything to say that my best friend is flirting with my…other best friend?”            

Kitty stood at the stove as she waited for the tea to heat up and squinted her eyes at Steven before looking to her husband who was giving him the same look.           

 “What’s your deal, Hyde?” Y/n asked him, growing annoyed with him.            

“Oh, nothing,” he responded. “I’m just saying that he’s never done this for another girl before unless it was Jackie.”            

“Steven, what’re you getting at?” Red asked him.            

“Oh, I don’t know. Why don’t you tell me, Y/n?” Hyde said, staring coldly at her.           

 Y/n returned the glare. “If you’re insinuating that Fez likes me, you are terribly, terribly wrong.”            

“Then why would he do it for you?” he asked impatiently.           

 “I don’t know!” Y/n responded, flabbergasted. “Because he wants to be nice?”            

“Nice, ha!” Steven hollered, causing everyone to look at him in surprise. “Guys don’t do things just to be nice.”            

Y/n gave him a look. “Why do you care so much what he does?”           

 “Yeah, Hyde. Why do you care?” Eric asked with a smirk.            

Steven realized what he was doing and looked at everyone who was looking at him with furrowed brows. He straightened his posture and looked down at his lunch, clearing his throat. “I don’t. I just find it rather odd.”            

“And if Fez does like me, what’s it to ya?” Y/n asked, cocking her head to the side.           

 “It doesn’t,” Hyde replied coldly, taking a sip from his iced tea.             

Y/n lifted an eyebrow at him before finishing off her toast.             

“Is there something going on between you two?” Red asked.            

The couple stole a glance at each other before looking to Red.           

 “No, not at all,” Y/n replied casually.           

 “Why would there be?” Steven asked.            

“I don’t know. You’re acting weird,” Red commented. “Stop it.”            

Steven grinned at him. “Yes, sir.”           

 “Here’s your tea, sweetheart,” Kitty said, bringing over a mug of tea. “And I put in some honey, Honey.” She laughed at her own joke.            

Y/n chuckled softly. “Thanks, Mom.”           

 “Oh, by the way, Sasha called for you yesterday,” Kitty said, sitting back down.            

Y/n perked up. “She did? Why?”          

  “I’m not too sure. She wanted to talk to you about something, but I told her you weren’t feeling well. So, I took down her number and told her you’d give her a call back when you feel better.”           

 “Yeah, I’ll call her back once I can stop vomiting.”            

“And yet, you’ve been able to achieve that this whole time,” Eric said sarcastically. “Must feel nice to finally be able to achieve something for once. Congrats, sis.”           

Y/n glared at him. “If I could control it, I’d do it on you right now.”            

“Okay, that’s enough,” Kitty cut in. “Finish your lunches.”            

“I can’t. I’m going downstairs to watch TV,” Y/n whimpered.           

 “Okay. Don’t forget your tea!” Kitty called out.            

Y/n turned back around and grabbed the warm mug between her cold hands and made her way downstairs. On her way, she grabbed the midol and the hot water bottle.            

At this point, Steven was seething as he watched his girlfriend take Fez’s gifts.        

 “Alright, well, I’m heading out for a few,” Steven announced, quickly getting up. “Thanks for the lunch, Mrs. Forman.”           

 “Oh, you’re welcome, dear,” she responded.           

 “Wanna come?” Hyde asked Eric.            

Eric looked up at him. “What for?”           

 “Just come on,” Hyde pushed and grabbed Eric by the shirt, tugging him out the door.           

 “But I’m not finished!” Eric whined.           

 “You are now,” Hyde said before closing the sliding door.            

“What’s with them?” Red asked.           

 “I have no clue,” Kitty responded, not caring. “They’re always up to something.”             

Outside, Eric shoved himself out of Hyde’s grasp. “What the hell, man?”            

“Get in the car,” Hyde ordered, unlocking the El Camino.            

“What? No,” Eric said, standing in his place.           

 “Get in. We have to talk.”           

 Eric crossed his arms. “I have nothing to say to you.”            

 “Great. Then you can just listen,” Hyde responded standing in front of the driver’s side door, waiting for Eric to get in. His arm rested on top of the car casually as if not a care in the world. “You going to get in?”            

“Why should I?”           

 Hyde groaned. “Just get in the car, man!”            

“Are you kidnapping me?” Eric asked as he slowly made his way to the passenger’s side.            

“Of course not.”            

“You gonna take me to the middle of nowhere, take my clothes after you convince met to skinny dip in the lake, and abandon me while I walk around naked and afraid like last time?”            

Hyde rolled his eyes. “I came back for you, didn’t I?”           

 “Three hours later!”           

 “For the love of God, just shut up and get in the car!”           

 “It was so cold,” Eric whimpered as he slid in the front seat and shut the door. “Where are we going?”           

 “For a drive,” Hyde responded and backed out the driveway. Once they were on the road, Hyde broke the silence. “Listen, man. This whole thing between you, me, and Y/n has gotten way out of hand.”            

“You don’t have to tell me.”            

“What happened to you shuttin’ up and letting me talk?”           

 Eric sighed, making a face. “Fine.”           

 “Look,” Hyde began. “I know you’re pissed off at us for dating and going behind your back—”           

 “And lying.”           

 “…Yeah, and lying about it. But I need you to know that everything I said is true. Y/n is the best thing that’s ever happened to me and when I say that I will do whatever I can to make her happy, I mean it. And this whole ending a friendship over it is stupid.”           

 Eric stared at Hyde in disbelief. “You’re serious about this? About my sister?”             

“Yeah, man. That’s why I’m here talking to you,” he responded and turned onto the main road. “I know we could’ve gone around it differently, but come on man, what would you have done? You’ve been saying that we need to put ourselves in your shoes, well put yourself in our shoes. Imagine if Donna was my sister, but you really liked her. What would you have done?”           

 Eric was silent for a minute. “Well, we probably wouldn’t be friends considering you kissed her and tried to get with her.”            

Hyde gave an exasperated sigh. “Man, will you focus?”            

 Eric thought about it for a second. “I guess I can understand that.”           

 “And I want you to know that I won’t disappoint her. I will take care of her and make sure she gets everything she wants and needs. I’m not going to be like the rest of my family and be a deadbeat and end up in prison. I will do good for her.”            

Eric turned his gaze to him and suddenly felt an anchor of guilt settle in the pit of his stomach. “Oh, man. Look, Hyde when I said that…I didn’t mean it. I was angry and—”           

 “It’s fine,” Hyde said, cutting in.            

“No, no it’s not,” Eric turned to face him. “It was wrong of me to say that to you. It’s just that…she’s my sister, man. My twin, you know? My favorite sister. I can’t help but feel, you know, maybe a little overprotective of her.”            

“No, but you were right,” Hyde confessed and turned onto the highway. “I probably was headed down that path anyway. But being with her has actually made me want to be better.”            

Eric looked at Hyde like he had two heads. “You look like my friend, but you don’t sound like him. Where’s Hyde?!”           

 Hyde chuckled and turned off the highway, noticing Eric calling him his friend. “I know. It’s sickening.”            

Eric laughed and turned back around, facing the front. He noticed they were entering downtown. “Hyde…where are we going? This isn’t just a drive anymore.”            

“You’ll see in a minute,” he said and continued down a narrow road before stopping in front of a super store. He turned the car off and sat back quietly. “Just so you know, this wasn’t easy for me to talk about it. So, if you tell anyone, I’ll deny the whole thing.”            

Eric nodded and looked at Hyde seriously. “I’m still not happy about it, but I guess I don’t have a choice but to accept it. You two really do seem happy.”            

Hyde nodded and looked down. “We are, man.”            

“Just…don’t hurt her,” Eric said. “Then I’d have to kick your ass and then I’d end up getting my ass kicked and then Red will kick my ass for getting my ass kicked and then he’d hunt you down like a dog and then he’d kick your ass.”            

Hyde sat there in stunned silence. “Wow…that’s…detailed. How long have you been sitting on this?”            

“Pretty much since I found out.”           

 “Wow.”           

 “Yeah,” Eric replied. “Also, one more thing. I don’t wanna hear or see you and my sister doing anything. The image of you two doing anything makes me want to hurl.”          

  “Deal,” Hyde chucked. “So, are we good?”          

  Eric looked at him for a moment and grinned. “Yeah, man, we’re good.”            

Hyde nodded and the two boys lifted their hands, bringing each other in for bro-hug.           

 “Can I just ask you one question, though?” he asked.            

Hyde hummed.           

 “Why her? Why Y/n?”            

Hyde sighed, shaking his head. “I don’t know, man. She’s different. She’s smart and actually funny, interesting, and genuine. Really sweet and cares about others beside herself. Besides, she’s smoking hot.”            

“Well, I’d never thought I’d hear my best friend put my sister and ‘smoking hot’ in the same sentence,” Eric retorted and pretended to gag. “Really, really unpleasant.”           

 “I know. I just said that because I think it’s funny,” Hyde laughed.          

  Eric slugged him in the shoulder. “And every time you say stuff like that, you’ll get hit.”            

They laughed lightly together before Eric slapped a hand on Hyde’s shoulder. “And, uh, don’t worry about my parents. Your secret is safe with me.”            

“Thanks, man,” Hyde replied. “Well, let’s go inside.”           

 “Why are we at this one?” Eric asked, joining Hyde outside the car. “You know there’s like three different stores in town. Why this one?”           

 “Because this is the biggest one in Point Place and they have everything I want.”           

 “Which is?”           

 “You’ll see.”            

As they entered the store, Hyde went for the first thing he saw: flowers. Specifically, half a dozen red roses. Then he went towards the freezer section, grabbing a pint of her favorite ice cream: mint chocolate chip.           

 “Ice cream?” Eric questioned.            

“I heard chicks really dig ice cream during their…problem time.”           

 “Yeah, Donna eats like four of those.”           

 “Damn,” Hyde sighed. “I’m, uh, I’m not very good at this. All I know is I want Y/n to feel better and I was kind of a jerk earlier.”           

 “Yeah, about that,” Eric piped up, browsing the ice cream flavors. “Why were reacting that way?” Eric’s eyes grew a fraction wider. “You were jealous, weren’t you?”           

 “What? No. I don’t get jealous.”            

“You so did!” Eric laughed. “You hated that Fez bought all that stuff for her because you felt like a bad boyfriend for not thinking about it earlier!”            

“You wanna get your ass kicked this early in the day?” Hyde threatened.             

Eric continued to laugh at him. “Just admit it. You totally did.”          

  Hyde rolled his eyes as he found his way to the soft drink section and grabbed a few bottles of ginger ale. “Okay, fine, maybe a little. But he shouldn’t have been hitting on her. She’s my chick. I should be the one getting all the stuff she needs.”           

 “And that’s what you’re doing now,” Eric stated, looking around. “Is that why you brought me here? To help you find stuff that she would like?”            

“No,” Hyde answered as they entered another aisle. He found a tin box of saltines and bent down to grab them. “I know what she likes; I don’t need you for that. I mainly brought you here so that we could sort crap out.” He picked up a box of assorted chocolates, something he knew she’d like.             

“You trying to tell me something?” Eric smirked, causing Hyde to chuckle. “Don’t you think you maybe going a little overboard?” He asked when he noticed Hyde putting everything in the basket.           

 “Maybe,” he answered honestly and led Eric away from the grocery section. “I just want her to know that I care.”            

“Well, she’ll definitely get that message,” the twin responded and noticed where Hyde was leading them. “Seriously? Condoms?”           

 “You don’t want me to knock her up, do you?”           

 “I’m still trying to accept you two and by you doing this in front of me is really bumming me out.”           

 Hyde laughed cruelly. “That’s kind of funny.” He quickly grabbed a pack and threw it in the cart. “Just don’t look at ‘em.”           

 Eric sighed and looked away. “What else are you giving her?”           

 “Besides a good time?”           

 Eric dramatically screeched and squirmed. “Please. Stop. Saying. That.”           

 Hyde burst into laughter, laughing at his friend’s discomfort. “That will never get old.”          

  “You’re a sadistic son of a bitch, you know that?”                                                        

                                                   —Time Skip—            

Y/n laid on the couch in the basement, wrapped up in a blanket, mindlessly watching tv. She was in and out of consciousness for the good part of the afternoon. Even though she was sick, she was still upset about her little dispute with Hyde.            

When did he become so jealous? Why would he think that of Fez? And worse of all, why didn’t he trust her enough? It hurt, but she was more curious as of why. She could feel her stomach beginning to churn again as it was ready to bring back up what she brought down earlier. 

Please, God, no. She quickly sat up, the room spinning for a minute, before she ran back to the bathroom and found herself with her head in the toilet. This had to be the forty-fifth time in the last couple of days of her spending time kneeling in front of the toilet, emptying the contents of her stomach into the light green basin.            

She held her hair back as tears pricked the corner of her eyes. It hurt so much and all she wanted in that moment was just to stop. What in the hell did she catch that made her feel this violently ill? After she was sure she was done, except from the dry heaving, she wiped her mouth and flushed the toilet. She sat against it for a little while longer, wishing her stomach would calm down enough for her to get a good sleep in. She couldn’t help but let a few tears escape. Her back was hurting, her body was aching, and her throat was burning. And on top of all that, she started cramping earlier in the day and the pain hadn’t subsided.             

“Y/n?” she heard from the basement living room.           

 She groaned in response and heard footsteps approach the door to the tiny bathroom. She twisted her face in pain as another surge of nausea reared its ugly head. Hyde appeared in the doorway just as he saw her turn her pale and tortured face into the basin once again. He could hear her whimpers through each retched gag.           

 “Awe, Doll,” he cooed and knelt down beside her, rubbing her back. He gathered her long hair in his hands and tried to look anywhere besides the toilet. He gently shushed her and reassured her that he was there now for her.          

Once she was finished, she fumbled for the handle, and pulled down. Hyde handed her some tissues to wipe her mouth. She gratefully accepted it and sat up fully, leaning against the wall.            

“What’re you doing here?” she croaked. “I thought you were pissed at me.”            

“Well, that’s why I’m here,” he responded and helped her off the floor. He wrapped a protective arm around her waist and guided her back to the couch where Eric also sat.            

“Are you here to fight? Because this isn’t how I envisioned our first fight.”             

He gently sat her on the couch, handing her the blanket and chuckled. “No, that’s not why I’m here.”            

“Then what?”           

 “Mainly to give you these,” he responded and handed her the roses.            

Y/n’s face softened as she weakly grasped the flowers in her fists. “What’s this for?”           

 “An apology,” Hyde responded and took a deep breath. “I know I was a jealous jerk earlier and…I’m sorry, okay?”            

She looked at him in the eye. “Why were you?”            

“I don’t know,” he responded and rubbed his neck. “I just…I just didn’t like seeing some other guy bring you things that I should be bringing.”            

She meekly set the flowers down on the coffee table in front of her. “Steven, do you not trust me?”            

“What? Of course I do.”            

“Then why did you act like Fez was going to hook up with me and I wouldn’t be able to say no?”            

“No, it’s not that. I…I—can you hang on a second?” he turned around to look at Eric. “Can we get a minute?” he asked impatiently.           

 Eric’s smug look never left his face. “Sure. Doll.”           

 Hyde stood abruptly, intimidatingly. Eric laughed and ran upstairs.            

Y/n knit her eyebrows together. “You guys are okay now or something?”            

“Yeah,” he cleared his throat and sat back down. “That’s another story.”            

Y/n nodded. “You were saying?”            

“Look, Y/n, when I saw Fez jumping in to immediately take care of you, I guess it felt like I…wasn’t doing my job as your boyfriend. And then when you said it did bother you, I knew I wasn’t. And…that maybe what everyone thinks is true.”            

“Which is what?” she pressed.           

 “C’mon, you’re really going to make me say it?”           

 “Yes,” she responded sternly.             

Hyde sighed and tore his eyes away from hers. “That…I’m not good enough…for you. There. Ya happy?”           

Y/n sighed, giving him a sad look. “No,” she responded gently and grabbed his hand. “No, I’m not happy. You can’t think that. You can’t let Fez get to you like that and it really didn’t bother me that you didn’t jump up to help me either. I’m a big girl. I can very well go get the stuff myself.”           

“So, you don’t mind?”           

 She smiled gently. “No. Yes, it’s nice if you did that stuff for me and trust me, I’d love it, but I’m not going to make you do it for me. I want you to want to do it for me.”            

He smiled at her and kissed the side of her head. “I did get you some things though.” He leaned down and grabbed the white bag, laying out the contents on the table. “I got you some ginger ale and saltines to help you with the nausea and then when it passes, I got you some chocolates and ice cream to satisfy your cravings.”           

 The look of sweets made her stomach churn, but she smiled through it and leaned her head on his shoulder. “Thank you, baby.”            

“You’re welcome,” he said quietly and kissed her head once more. He noticed that she was shivering and gently stood. “I’ll be right back.” He high tailed it to his room and brought back a sweater. “Here.”            

She grabbed it gratefully and threw it over her head, inhaling his scent: musk and woodsy. He settled on the couch next to her as she cuddled his side. He grabbed the blanket and threw it over both of them.           

“So, how was your day?” he asked her.            

“Fantastic,” she responded. “I spent the day throwing up my body weight and writhing in pain.”           

 “Sounds like a blast,” he chucked.           

“Oh, yeah, it was like a party in the toilet,” Y/n responded and chuckled when Hyde made a face. “How was yours?”           

 “Well, you know, it was fine,” he responded.             

“You and Eric work things out?”            

“Yeah. He’s still not happy about it, but he seems to—or trying to at least—accept it. I made him see the bigger picture here.”           

 “Which is?”            

“Us doing it.”           

 “Steven!”            

He threw his head back laughing. “I’m kidding.”           

 “You better be,” she said and reached over, grabbing the ginger ale. She laid back into his side and took a sip. She hummed and set it in her lap.            “Thank you, Steven. This is probably the best thing anyone has ever done for me.”            

He smiled at her gently. “Anything for you, doll.”           

 “Awe that’s so cute,” Eric called from the staircase. “It makes me want to vomit.”            

Y/n scowled at him. “What do you want?”            

“Well, I wanted to talk to you,” he said and sat down in the opposite chair.            

“You want to yell at me again?”           

 “No,” he responded and looked at the ground. “I’m sorry for the way I reacted. I know I was an ass and I should’ve handled it better, but c’mon, my best friend and my sister, hooking up. I never thought that this would happen and to say I was shocked is an understatement.”           

 “I know,” she responded. “But you still said some pretty hurtful things, Eric, and you can’t take that back.”            

“I know and I wish I could. You’re my sister, the best one at that, and Hyde, you’re like a brother to me and I just…it hurt, okay? I can understand not wanting to tell anyone else, but to hide it from me? I felt like you couldn’t trust me.”            

Y/n cast her eyes down, feeling guilt. “I’m so sorry, Eric. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you. Lying to you wasn’t easy for me.”

“Then why did you do it?”

 “How would you take it if we just straight up told you?”            “

Yeah, Forman, what would you have said if I straight up said, ‘I’m nailing your sister.’ I bet you still wouldn’t have taken that lightly.”           

 Eric shuttered at the thought. “Yeah, definitely wouldn’t have. But it still wouldn’t have been as bad as me catching you.”            

Y/n looked at her twin for a moment before letting out a groan. “Dammit, I hate it when you’re right.”           

 “Yeah, and it’s not like I’m not going to kill you or anything.”           

 “Well, to be fair you did try to disown us,” Hyde defended.            

“Okay, yeah, but I just didn’t want to look at you guys at the moment,” Eric said.           

 “But kicking us out of the group and the house was the logical answer?” Y/n squinted at him.            

“Yeah, not my finest moment,” he agreed and sat down next to Y/n, causing her to shift over. “I’m really sorry, Y/n. I hope you can forgive me.”            

Y/n looked at her brother, eyes getting all misty. “Only if you can forgive me.”            

Eric smiled at her. “C’mere little sister.” He brought her in and hugged her tight. 

Y/n reciprocated by wrapping her arms tightly. “I’m only two minutes younger.” 

“Still,” he chuckled. “Besides, if I don’t forgive you, then I won’t have a sister anymore.”           

 “We have Laurie,” Y/n responded, pulling away.           

 “Do you really want her close?”            

Y/n paused, pretending to think it over. “No, I really don’t.”           

 Eric chuckled. “Look, Y/n. I know I was a jerk, but you’re not only my sister, you’re my best friend and I don’t want anything to come between us.”            

Y/n nodded, smiling and wiped at her eyes. “Me too.”           

 “I’m still not entirely happy about you two and to be honest, I’m not sure if I ever will be, but I want you two to be happy and if it’s you two that make each other happy, then so be it. I just don’t want to see any of it.”            

“You got it,” Y/n responded, feeling lighter about the situation.           

 “I’m going to give you the same speech I gave Hyde,” Eric continued as Y/n’s eyebrows knitted together. “I’d never thought I’d have to say this to my sister about my best friend, but don’t hurt him. I may not be able to kick his ass, but I can for sure…try to kick yours.” As he was saying it, he knew it wasn’t true. Even if it was, he wasn’t going to do it anyway.         

Y/n cracked a wide smile, a smile that she hadn’t been able to muster for the last couple of days, and nodded. “Okay, bro. That sounds fair.”            

He turned to Hyde. “Just so you know, if you get her pregnant, I will have to find a new and interesting way to kick your ass.”           

 “Trust me, man, that ain’t gonna happen,” Hyde responded.            

“Yeah, we’re careful,” Y/n responded, adjusting herself to be laying against Hyde. Her stomach and back were starting hurt again and she was desperate to find some relief. Hyde threw an arm over her shoulders, bringing her closer. “Besides, Dad would literally stick his foot in both of our asses.”            

“And somehow, he’d still find a way to blame me,” Eric said.           

 “Hey, Y/n baby,” Fez called out, entering the basement. “How’re you feeling? You get my gifts?”           

 “Hi Fez,” Y/n greeted with a tiny smile. “I did, thank you. It was very nice of you, but I’m not feeling too much better.”            

“Sorry to hear that,” he responded.             

Y/n shrugged and snuggled deeper into Hyde’s side. “What’re you doing here anyway?”            

“Just wanted to come by and see how you were feeling,” he responded.            

 “No, you didn’t,” Hyde spit. “You came here to see if she was alone, didn’t you?”           

 Fez made a face at him. “What’re you talking about? No, I’m not!”            

“Yes you are!” he said and stood up. “Now, knock it off before I make you the first person to touch his chin to ass!”           

 Fez looked offended, placing his hand on his chest. “Have you been spying on me?!”           

 “Steven, honey, it’s not that big of deal,” Y/n said, trying to calm down the situation.           

 “Yeah, honey, listen to your lady,” Fez said, starting to get nervous.            

 “No, Y/n, he needs to understand respect,” he replied.           

 “I’m sure he gets it now,” Y/n said, signaling Fez to run now.            

“No, he doesn’t,” he responded. “If he—”            

He was cut off by the slamming of the door as Fez ran outside, away from him.           

 “He’s not getting away that easily,” Hyde commented before darting to the door.           

 “Hyde, no!” Y/n called after him. She jumped up from her seat, despite her stomach and head screaming at her.            

 Hyde ran out the door, causing it to slam against the wall. Y/n followed him out the door, ignoring the sudden faint feeling she had.            

“Steven, stop!” she called again, her voice weakened and wavering. She could see Hyde quickly gaining speed on Fez.            

 Fez screamed as Hyde tackled him to the ground on the Forman’s front lawn. Eric was behind Y/n in a flash, watching the scene in front of him unfold. Hyde struggling to get Fez in a choke hold, Fez fighting to get out of his grip, and Y/n yelling at him to stop.            

 “Steven, enough!” Y/n shrieked weakly, her voice quieting as the world started to spin, the edges of her vision darkening. “Steven, please…” 

Her vision darkened as she hit the ground, making the two boys suddenly stop to jerk their attention towards her. Eric dropped to the ground next to her.

“Y/n!” Steven shouted, letting Fez go and running over to her. “Y/n!”

 And that was the last thing she heard before she was swallowed by darkness.

Tags: @lieswithoutfairytales​ @mdittyz123​ @n-dg-wm​ @undead-sierra​ @random-thoughts-003​ @taysirene​

[what-if-rpg]

Welcome to the family, JACKIE! Your application to FRANNIE FABRAY was accepted. I am really happy to have you around! Make sure to read the beginners checklist, and remember, have fun! I can’t wait to roleplay with you! Have fun!

IN CHARACTER

CHARACTER NAME: Francesca Lucille Fabray CHARACTER AGE & DATE OF BIRTH: 29 & December 13th OCCUPATION: Owner of the vet clinic FACE CLAIM: Blake Lively HOMETOWN & CITY WHERE LIVES NOW: Lima, Ohio & Upper East Side, NYC SEXUAL ORIENTATION & GENDER: Heterosexual & Female RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Dating Bradley Jackson; Ex-Wife of Leon Berry POSITIVE TRAITS: Nurturing, Determined, & Intelligent NEGATIVE TRAITS: Stubborn, Flirtatious, & Vindictive CHARACTER QUOTE/LYRIC: Please include a quote or lyric that you feel describes your character. ANYTHING ELSE?: Change Leon to her ex-husband SECONDARY CHARACTER CHOICE: N/A

HEADCANONS

Her dream was to become a veterinarian. After being accepted into Harvard, and moving to Boston for her freshmen year, she soon had found herself falling for the one guy that could take everything from her. Right before graduation, Frannie had lost her virginity to a man named Bradley Jackson—her first real boyfriend—and had discovered that she was about two months pregnant. During the time before that, she started staying out with him at night and checking out parties that she’d never gone to in high school. She’d chosen not to tell Bradley about their child, terrified that he’d leave her. During that short time, Frannie had developed horrible morning sickness, the blonde feigned that she had food poisoning or the flu to her roommate and boyfriend. Her only thoughts at the time were that she’d disappoint her father and that she wasn’t ready to have a child at the age of nineteen. Secretly, Frannie had gone to an abortion clinic shortly after finding out.

A few years after the pair broke up, while Frannie was visiting her parents, she met Leon Berry. He was thirteen years older and seemed more stable. She was still young and impressionable and soon found herself getting pregnant. Again. This time, she decided to keep the baby; her guilt already swallowing her whole with her first child. Halfway through veterinarian school, the two decided to get married as soon as possible, so no one knew their baby was born out of wedlock, and Leon moved to Boston until Frannie finished her schooling. This seemed to appease her parents, who had wanted their daughter to marry someone respectable with money. In 2013, Frannie had their daughter—Annalise—who seemed to bring the newlyweds closer together.

The marriage wouldn’t remain happy, the younger female realizing that they’d married for all the wrong reasons, but she’d keep her mouth closed. After obtaining her degree in 2015, Frannie decided that she wanted to move to New York City to work under a veterinarian that she was able to work with in college as an intern on the weekends. Leon wanted to move back to Lima, so, with a heavy heart, Frannie and Annalise went with him. Flash forward a few months, and they were constantly arguing when Annalise would go to one of her grandparents’ house. Frannie was now 26 and wanted out of Lima, while Leon was 39 and wanted to keep his wife in the small town where they could have a quiet life where they were both well known.

Recently, Frannie’s discovered that she has three half-siblings. Feeling like it would be a betrayal to her mother, she refuses to let any of them into her life.

Back in 2017, Frannie and Bradley ran into each other and decided to start dating. She wasn’t sure how he’d react to her four-year-old daughter and her divorce status, but he’s seemed okay with it after she explained how it happened.

Frannie Fabray is the golden girl from Lima, Ohio. Everyone knows her for being highly intelligent—always at the top of her class— and being the head cheerleader and Prom Queen. Frannie was the girl that every single guy and girl wanted to have as a girlfriend. Modeling in her free time and volunteering at the hospital during the weekend. Frannie and her fraternal twin ruled McKinley High School.

Growing up, she’d always been the one oblivious to her father’s abuse, Kate would diffuse the situation, or Frannie would be out visiting family members or participating in school activities���even at such a young age. It didn’t help that her father treated Frannie as if she was a precious gem and never revealed the monster that he was, leaving the female oblivious. When they were sixteen, Kate had been sent away, leaving the eldest Fabray to question why, but it was easy for her to take over ruling the school alone—even though it felt bizarre. She’d made sure that a birthday card was sent to her sister after getting her mother to give her the address of where she could send more. Judy had been too afraid to do it, and Frannie would never discover why until years later. Frannie’s still having a hard time coping with the fact that her father had hidden that he was abusive, she’s still in denial of it.

In March of 2016, after just four years of marriage, Frannie filed for divorce and took Annalise with her to New York City. She worked with the vet who had given her her internship, and soon found herself completely taking over the veterinarian practice. Now with a practice in New York and Lima, Frannie’s looking to expand her practice. Annalise attends elementary school in New York and goes with her father during breaks or when one of her parents takes a trip to either location. The two have finally become civil for their daughter and realized that their timing was off.

CONNECTIONS

JUDY & RUSSELL FABRAY (Parents): Frannie’s always been close to her parents. She’s the golden-child. She was always daddy’s little girl and was sheltered from the abuse, only discovering that her father was abusive when her and Quinn got closer. KATHERINE FABRAY (Twin Sister): Frannie never really understood why Kate left home when they were sixteen. She heard rumors throughout school but her parents never gave her a straight answer. After some pleading, her mother finally gave Frannie the address to send mail to her sister which only consisted of a birthday card every year. Unaware there her sister doesn’t still live there, she continues to send cards to this day. QUINN FABRAY (Younger Sister): Quinn was always in Frannie’s shadow. He always wanted to be like her big sister, or even better, all to have their father’s love. But then, she started to ‘hate’ her sister. They had a very complicated relationship, and even nowadays they have a complicated relationship. But, they are working out on things and, slowly, they are getting closer and finally having that so-called ‘normal’ relationship between sisters. DANIEL, AVERY & JULIETTE FABRAY (Half-Siblings): Frannie’s still having a hard time wrapping her mind around the fact that she has half-siblings. She does her best to keep her distance from them; not wanting to feel like she’s betraying her mother by trying to have a relationship with them. Mrs. & Mr. Sanders; Mrs. Fabray & Mr. Fabray (Grandparents): Frannie was always the little girl that enjoyed going to either of her grandparents’ houses. When she was little and involved in after school activities, one of her grandmothers would usually take her to them so that her parents could have a break with three girls. Annalise Berry (Daughter): Annalise is Frannie’s six year old daughter than she had with Leon. She lives permanently with Frannie in New York but sees her father whenever she has breaks from school or one of her parents makes the trip to the other location. LEON BERRY (Baby Father & Ex-Husband): Frannie & Leon met while Frannie was visiting her parents in Lima during her second year of veterinarian school. The two quickly started dating after Frannie saw how stable he was due to her parents pressing her. She soon got pregnant and the two decided to get married to cover up the fact that their child was conceived out of wedlock. They divorced in 2016 and Frannie moved to New York City with their daughter. Annalise still sees her father when she has time off of school or when Frannie visits Lima, or Leon happens to be in New York. BRADLEY JACKSON (Boyfriend): Frannie had first dated Bradley during her first year at college. He was her first love and someone that she continued loving even after they split up; which was probably one of the reasons why her and Leon didn’t work out. She lost her virginity to him and later found out that she was pregnant, feigning that she had the flu or food poisoning, the blonde covered up her early pregnancy symptoms before caving and having an abortion because she was afraid that Bradley would leave her since they were so young. She managed to keep it a secret throughout the duration of their relationship. They later met up again after she moved to NYC and began dating again. She’d been nervous that he’d have a hard time accepting that she had a daughter but he seems to have accepted that part. She still hasn’t told him that she had been pregnant with his child before. WILLA FLANAGAN (Best Friend): Frannie and Willa met while at Harvard and became close friends while Frannie was dating Bradley. They were roommates during Frannie’s Sophomore year of college, and quickly became the best of friends. Willa was the one that helped Frannie out of her postpartum depression after she had an abortion, and was always the one that made sure she was safe when they were out partying with the help of their other friends, taking on a slightly motherly role. When Frannie started dating Leon and became pregnant, Willa was the first person that the blonde turned to, and she later became Frannie’s maid-of-honor when she decided to marry Leon. After Willa got married, they’ve remained in touch and are still the best of friends.

[slapshotsandoneshots]

Warnings: This is an intense chapter that touches on subjects that might trigger some. Angst, Depression, Miscarriage, Religion. 

Chapter 14: What did I do Wrong?

It had been a few months since the season started. Hockey was in full swing and you thought you had everything under control. You had pushed all your doubts to the back of your mind even though they ever so often found their way back as you would lay in bed at night or when Tyler was away on a road trip.

Besides all the chaos, you really believed your relationship was back on track. Jackie was in town to visit for your birthday. You were currently making everyone breakfast when you felt the need to hurl. You were running to the bathroom just as Ty and his mother were making their way inside from the backyard.

Y/N? Honey are you okay? Jackie questioned as Tyler ran after you. He gathered your hair as you sat in front of the toilet.

“Are you okay?”

You just nodded. “I think that Chinese from last night messed with my stomach.” You finished and washed your face in the sink as Tyler watched you with a concerned look in the mirror.

“You know if you aren’t feeling good… you don’t have to come…” he started.

“Me not come to a game honoring my husband and my birthday party after? What do you think the answer to that is?” You smirked as you turned to face him.

“I would kiss you right now but you kind of just puked” He smiled as he shrugged.

You just shook your head. “Oh my gosh, the waffles will burn” and with that, you were running through the house, your chuckling husband close behind.

You, Jackie, and Tyler enjoyed your unburned waffles and you listened as Jackie and Tyler talk about one another’s lives. You would occasionally add your two cents on things but were more focused on keeping your breakfast in your stomach.

Your sickness continued throughout the day and the symptoms only continued to get worse. You knew how important this game was to Tyler. You could care less about your birthday, it came every year you could always have another run at it next year. You tried your best to play off your sickness and enjoy the day with your husband and your mother in law. 

The nausea eventually subsided to now be replaced by back pains and cramps. You were bent over in pain when Tyler walked into the closet where you were getting ready. 

“Babe, are you okay?” Tyler asked concern coming to your side and wrapping his arms around you. 

“Yea just deciding on what shoes currently.” you tried to chuckle but it came out strained. 

“Babe, really you don't have to come, my mom will come out with me it’s no big deal.” he tried rubbing your back.

“I’m coming Tyler, and it’s my birthday so you can't tell me no.” you smiled as your pain subsided for at least now. “You could put on my shoes for me though.” 

Tyler chuckled picking you up and placing you on the bed. He gently buckled your heels and you giggled as he tickled the bottom of your feet. 

“Now let’s go get you honored.” you smiled and placed a kiss softly on his lips. 

You made your way to the arena and you allowed yourself to be rushed around in the tunnels in preparation for the pregame ceremony. You were just trying to ignore the pain you felt in your stomach and abdomen. 

You got through the ceremony without looking like you were dying on the jumbotron. You sat and watched the game, you were happy they had won and the guys were excited for not only a win but your birthday party as well. You hated that you were not excited at all. 

You had made your way down to the tunnels to meet Tyler. You were contemplating how you were going to get out of your own party. The guys started to come out of the locker room they each tried to come and offer you their birthday wishes but suddenly you were feeling hazy. Their words were jumbling together and you couldn't tell who was talking to you. And then it went black. 

You woke up, still feeling hazy and the bright lights were almost blinding. The smell hit you and you know where you were. You slowly opened your eyes and you searched for Tyler. It made you extremely confused when you saw that he was crying. 

“Ty...What’s wrong? I’m okay babe..” you got out through some raspiness. 

Tyler rushed to your side. ‘Oh baby, you are okay I know.” you said rubbing your arm but you knew he was hiding something. 

“What is it?” you slowly asked scared to know his answer. 

“Y/N, you were pregnant. The pain and sickness you had this morning was a miscarriage...” Tyler started but that was all you heard. You were pregnant and you didn't even know it, and just like that it was ripped from your grasp. It was the most conflicted sentence you had ever heard. You felt as if you were hit by a bus. Suddenly you were sobbing before you even knew what your body was doing. You and Tyler just sat there in each other’s arms sobbing. 

For you time seemed to just glide by you. You felt unpresent in your own life. You were discharged with recommendations of someone to talk to. Talking was the last thing you wanted to do. You felt empty, your body had betrayed you. The first few days being home you just laid in bed not strong enough to really move. The stars gave Tyler time off from the road trip and Jackie stayed in town for support. 

You had found enough strength to get out of bed and start at least trying to get back into the swing of normal life when the stars came back in town. You knew Tyler needed to get back to the team and he wouldn't if you were still refusing to leave your room. You were trying your best but you were still feeling so empty. 

You were in the kitchen washing dishes from breakfast when Tyler and Jackie got back from the grocery store. 

“Y/N, its so good to see you downstairs.” Jackie smiled giving you a hug as she placed groceries down on the counter. “I knew you would find your strength, I was telling Tyler this morning that God gives out what he knows we can handle, it might not make sense right now but it will in time.” 

Tyler glanced your way to read your reaction but you didn't offer much. 

“I know its hard to understand sometimes but its all apart of his plan.” she started once more but this time Tyler spoke back, 

“I know but I'm not worried about his plan mom. I’m worried about our plan and Im worried about my wife.” he threw back with a harsher tone in his voice. 

“I really think Y/N should talk to the pastor back home.”

Tyler didn't look at his mother this time. He looked at you ignoring his continuing mother. “Y/N, me, let me help you.” he started. 

“We will shoulder this burden as a family as it is placed upon us.” Jackie continued. 

You looked at Tyler as he seemed to be getting more upset. “She's just trying to help” you whispered as you dried another dish. 

“Is she though? Is she helping?” Tyler responded getting louder. You were surprised Tyler was going at it like this with his mother. 

“Don't talk to her like that Tyler.” Jackie scolded. 

“Like what mom? I’m just talking to my wife! I am trying to understand! He argued. 

They continued and you could feel the pressure building up and suddenly the glass bowl you were holding was shattering at your feet. 

“Stop, stop, stop it!” you yelled as they both freezed to look at you. 

“None of this is helping. You are not helping, either one of you! I am standing here listening to you tell me that god only gives me what I can handle and you telling me that you can help me and honestly I have no idea what I am feeling. I feel like the rug has been pulled from beneath my feet. I feel like Im drowning but at the same time I feel nothing. God keeps throwing this shit at me and i don't know what else I can take. What did I do wrong? What I do know is that I am sad and I am alone. You are both just standing there yelling at each other and talking at me but I am alone and it is terrifying. And the louder you two get the more terrified I become so I need you both to shut up. Just shut up.

Tyler closed his eyes as if you had just hurled the bowl into his gut, and Jackie was as white as a ghost. 

You didn't care.  

[lirlovesfic]

The Choice

A Doctor Who fanfic

Summary: After GitF, the TARDIS brings the Doctor, Rose, and Mickey back to the estate to solve a problem involving the TARDIS herself. But when they see a familiar face, the face of someone who should not exist, they realize the problem is deeper than they thought and could endanger the Doctor’s very existence. Primary characters: Ninth Doctor, Tenth Doctor, Rose Tyler, Mickey Smith, Jackie Tyler. Genres: Romance, mystery, adventure, drama, character study, HN AU, fobbed!Nine, sick TARDIS. Pairings: Nine/Rose, Ten/Rose Rating: Adult

Warning: none for this chaper

a/n: I am currently working on editing this chapter-by-chapter, with the hopes of completing a chapter a day until I catch up with myself. As I mentioned in a previous post, I’m doing it to try to get back into the swing of writing and to build some momentum in order to finish this. Also, there have been some tiny things nagging at me for a while (grammar, punctuation, etc.) so I’ll be correcting as many of them as I can find as I go. The story will not change. In fact, most of the changes are going to be so minor that I doubt anyone (besides myself) will notice. But to keep myself on target, I’ll be posting it all here as I go, with links to the other websites it’s on. I hope you enjoy it.

Catch up: on AO3, on TSP, on ffnet

This chapter: on AO3, on TSP, on ffnet

Chapter Eighteen—London, 15 July 2007

Rose stared unseeing out the window of the bus at the drizzle of rain that had begun to fall. With nothing else to occupy her mind on the trip home, her thoughts returned to the events of the past few weeks. Her memories flitted from one to another, seemingly with no rhyme or reason.

Arriving back on the Powell Estate. Seeing her first Doctor again, only for him not to remember her. Or anything else. And be human to boot.

Her second Doctor, leaving both her and Mickey on the spaceship right after he said he'd never leave her.

Feeling lied to.

Trying to calm Mickey, despite how terrified she'd been herself.

Meeting Reinette, and for the first time in a long time feeling inadequate.

The TARDIS being sick.

Seeing that piece of shit Jimmy Stone again.

Her second Doctor leaving her here and taking off with Mickey.

Working. At a real job, not just as a lunch lady or a waitress during an adventure.

Seeing her first Doctor again.

Worrying about her second Doctor and Mickey, as they tried to find out what was wrong with the TARDIS. And him.

Not being able to reach the Doctor on her mobile.

The TARDIS being sick.

Missing her second Doctor.

Seeing her first Doctor again, after being sure she'd never see him again.

Holding his hand.

Having a cuddle.

Kissing him.

Oh Lord, kissing him…

Lost in her thoughts, Rose almost missed her stop. When she realized where they were, she jumped up and rushed down the aisle. As she descended the stairs, someone was already getting on. They crashed into one other.

"Oh my God. Rose?"

Rose stared at the short, dark-haired girl in front of her.

"Shareen?"

Shareen pulled her into a tight hug. Then she pushed her away and slugged her in the arm.

"Ow," Rose complained.

"That was for not telling me you were back!" Shareen said.

"Oi! Are you two coming or going?" the bus driver asked.

"Coming," Shareen said firmly. She flashed her travel card at the driver and then pulled Rose towards the back of the bus.

She sat down on an empty seat and yanked Rose down to sit next to her. "Why didn't you tell me you were back?" she demanded.

"Sorry," Rose said sheepishly. "But I haven't been back all that long. Only one week is all. And since then I've been busy."

"Too busy to call your best friend?"

"I've been workin' every day this week."

Shareen's dark brown eyes grew huge and round. "You've been back one week and you already got a job? That must be an Estate record. Where're you workin'?"

"The garage where Mickey used to work. So where are we goin'?" Rose asked, partially in an effort to change the subject.

Shareen named a pub they both knew on the high street. "We're meetin' Susie. We're finishin' up the last of the plans for her wedding."

"I thought her wedding was in a couple months."

"They decided to move it up," Shareen told her.

"Why?"

"You'll see."

~oOo~

"Would you like more tea, love? Or more biscuits?" Gladys asked.

John was sitting on the small sofa in the crowded lounge of Gladys and Irene's flat, a china cup filled with tea in his hand and a matching saucer precariously balanced on his knee. The room was jam packed with furniture. End tables had been placed on either side of the sofa, and two overstuffed chairs sat opposite it, with a low glass coffee table between them. There was a rocking chair, a doily covered side table next to it, the ubiquitous telly on a stand in the corner. And there were figurines everywhere, mostly of cats: cats curled up, sleeping; cats playing with balls of yarn; cats carrying kittens in their mouths. There was even one sitting on the top of a tall curio cabinet, perched as if she was reaching over to bat the occasional passerby with her paw.

"No, ta," he answered. "As much as I'd love to…"

"Oh, we know," Gladys said. "There aren't any secrets on the Estate." She gave him a knowing smile. "You need to go and meet that girl you're courting, don't you? Rose Tyler, isn't it?"

He stared at her. "I'm not—"

"They don't call it courting anymore, Gladys," Irene interrupted. "People haven't used the word courting for sixty years."

"They called it courting when I was young," her sister argued.

"And you are seventy-five, love," Irene reminded her as she patted her hand.

Gladys's eyes widened in surprise. "Am I?"

"Yes, Gladys." Irene turned to John. "Gladys sometimes forgets how old she is, bless her heart," she said affectionately.

"Happens to the best of us," John answered, thinking about his own situation. He couldn't remember his real name, let alone his age.

"Well, if they don't call it courting anymore, what do they call it?" Gladys asked.

"Seeing each other," Irene told her. When Gladys still looked confused, she continued. "They're lovers, Gladys."

John's jaw dropped. He stared at her. "Oh, we're… we're not…"

"You aren't? Well, I wouldn't worry about it," she told him. "If you aren't yet, you will be soon." She winked at him.

"Well, then you'd better get going," Gladys said. "Because if you're going to go shag, you need a shower." She wrinkled her nose and waved her hand in front of it.

"We're not—"

"And you should consider a haircut. And a shave," Irene told him pointedly. "Pretty, young thing like Rose, with that grey in your beard, you look like her grandfather."

His eyebrows shot up. "Grandfather?"

"I don't know, Irene," Gladys said, appraising him. "I think he's dead sexy just the way he is. The long hair gives her something to grab onto, and you know just how good a beard can be. The things my fourth husband could do with his beard..."

John's eyes widened, and he fought a laugh from escaping. "Ladies, it's been lovely, but I think it's time for me to go."

Outside he was hit with a blast of warm, humid air. It wasn't raining, but it clearly had been recently. The railing and the walkway overhead were dripping, and small puddles had formed in the courtyard where the pavement was uneven. Someone he'd done a job for today had said the forecast was for rain, and evidently he was right.

As soon as he was back in his own flat, John quickly showered and dressed. Afterwards he stared into the mirror over the sink. An old man stared back at him. Irene was right, he had a little grey in his beard. Since when did he have a beard? He certainly hadn't intended to grow one. Frowning, he ran a hand over his unshaven face. When had he last shaved? He couldn't remember.

And then there was his hair. His hair looked like it hadn't seen scissors in six months. Which made sense, because it hadn't. As a result, it was too short to be cool and too long to be trendy. Not that that mattered. He was too old to be trendy anyway. Either way, Gladys's words to the contrary, with his hair and his beard in their current states, he looked like hell. No wonder Jimmy had accused him of being Rose's grandfather.

Well, there was one way to fix that, he thought.

Ten minutes later he was sitting down in the barber shop around the corner.

"Take it all off," he said.

~oOo~

Ten minutes later, Rose and Shareen walked into the pub to find Susie MacGinnis had already arrived. Unlike the stylish clothes she usually wore, she was wearing an oversized red T-shirt and jeans. Her long ginger hair was pulled up into a high ponytail.

Somehow Susie had managed to grab the best table in the place, the one next to the window, and she had a huge plate of chips and a fizzy drink in front of her.

Her face lit up when she saw them. "Rose, when did you get back?" She stood up to greet them.

Rose's jaw dropped as she stared at her friend's baby bump. "Susie, you're… you're…"

"Yep," she said, grinning. "Five months gone." She rubbed her gently rounded belly. "A little girl, thank God. Don't know if I could handle a boy first time out."

Slowly the look of shock on Rose's face was replaced by a wide grin. "Congratulations!" She wrapped Susie in a big hug. When they all sat down at the table, she asked, "So is that why the wedding's been moved up?"

"Yeah," Susie said. "I still want to be able to wear my wedding dress. I tried it on yesterday and I could barely fit into it. And that's after they let it out as far as they could without adding more material. So we decided to move the wedding." She rubbed her swollen belly. "Besides, this one's not gonna get any smaller. I don't want to walk down the aisle looking like a hippo. Or I should say, any more like a hippo than I already do."

"You're gonna be gorgeous no matter what," Shareen said. "And Rob's gonna think so too."

"You're just sayin' that because you're my maid of honor," Susie said.

"Nah, I don't like you enough to lie to you," Shareen told her seriously, and then burst out laughing.

Susie stuck her tongue out her.

The door to the pub opened, and Rita walked in. Her left eye was almost swollen shut, and makeup did nothing to disguise the large bruise on the left side of her face. Shareen and Susie didn't bother to ask what had happened.

"Oh my God, Rita," Susie said, wincing in sympathy.

Shareen, on the other hand, was disgusted. "I hope you kicked that piece of shit in the bollocks."

"How are you doing?" Rose asked.

"Better than last night," Rita answered. She turned to the others. "Rose's friend John chased Chuck off, then Joe stayed with me. I'm movin' into his place for a week or so until I can find someplace else to go. We moved my stuff over there first thing this morning."

"I thought you said your brother's place was too small," Rose said.

"It's better than where I was," Rita stated. "And me stayin' with Joe, that's only between us, yeah? Only you three know, outside my family. I don't want Chuck findin' out where I am."

They all nodded, and then something occurred to Rose.

"How'd you know John was my friend?"

"Seriously?" Rita asked. "First, there was the way you were actin' with each other last night. Then there was the fact you went home with him. And third, do you even remember where you live? You know how the Estate is. Everyone knew you two were seein' each other, probably even before you did."

"Rose went home with someone?" Shareen asked her, and then slugged Rose in the shoulder again. "Why didn't you tell me? First you get home and you don't tell me, then you get a job and you don't tell me, and now you're seein' someone and you don't tell me!" She slugged Rose a third time and then sat back in her chair, crossed her arms, and scowled at her.

"I said sorry!" Rose protested. "And I'm not seein' John. Not really." She turned to Rita. "And how'd you know I went home with him?"

"Seriously?" Rita asked again. "First rule of the Estate is there are no secrets on the Estate. Plus I understand you snuck home this morning in your nighty."

"How'd you find out about that?" Rose asked incredulously.

Rita began ticking things off on her fingers. "Your mum called Bev, Bev called Rhonda, Rhonda told Beth at the market, and then Beth told Joe's girlfriend, Julie. Julie told Joe, who didn't care one way or the other but told me anyway."

Elbows on the table, Rose dropped her head in her hands. How could she have forgotten how gossipy the Powell Estate could be?

"Whatever happened to the Doctor?" Shareen asked.

"Who's the Doctor?" Susie asked.

"The bloke Rose has been travelin' with for the last couple of years," Shareen answered. She turned back to Rose. "I thought the two of you were together."

"The Doctor and I aren't like that," Rose told her.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"Not even once? Neither of you headed to the bathroom half asleep in the middle of the night and ended up in the wrong bedroom?"

Rose laughed and shook her head. "Nope. Not even once."

"What is he, gay or something?" Shareen asked.

For the second time that day, an image of Reinette crossed Rose's mind. "Nope, not gay."

"Is he really, really ugly, then?" Susie asked. "Because I'd think that after two years even Rita's brother Joe would look good after a couple of drinks."

"Oi!" Rita protested.

"I never met the Doctor, but Keisha did. According to her, he was a looker," Shareen said. "A bit odd, but tall and well fit is what she said."

"Where is Keisha anyway?" Rose asked, trying to change the subject.

"She and her brother went travelin'," Shareen told her.

"They were gonna be back well before the wedding—" Susie said.

"Until the wedding got moved up," Shareen said teasingly. "Are you sure you don't have twins in there?"

"Oh, God, don't even joke about that!"

"I'll go order for the rest of us," Rose volunteered, and when she came back they were still talking about the wedding and the baby. To her relief conversation never returned to her, the Doctor, or John. Because she didn't know what she'd do if any of them ever figured out John was the Doctor.

~oOo~

Back in his flat after his visit to the barber, John stared in the mirror in his bathroom again, surveying his newly shaved face and closely-cropped hair. He frowned. He had a daft face, he decided, with a large nose, a receding hairline, a mole on his cheek, and overly large ears.

He ran a hand over his head. It felt odd to have almost all his hair gone, but it felt somehow right at the same time, almost like he felt more like himself in some way he couldn't put his finger on. He certainly felt cooler, which was a distinct advantage in July. Having it gone made him look younger as well. He thought. He hoped.

Too bad the lack of hair emphasized how large his ears were.

Oh well. Nothing to be done about that.

He glanced at the clock. Half four. Was that too early to call her?

Maybe, but he decided that he didn't care.

He pulled out his mobile and pressed speed dial.

"The party you are trying to reach is unavailable. If you would like to leave a message—"

He frowned again. She told him to ring her when he was done. He dialed again.

"The party you are trying to reach is unavailable. If you would like to leave a message—"

"Huh."

Maybe her phone was turned off for some reason. After thinking a moment, he decided to pick her up at her flat. After all, she had agreed to come over. If she had changed her mind, he'd just come home.

A tiny part of him, a part that he tried to ignore, desperately hoped she hadn't changed her mind.

Remembering that it had been raining earlier, he grabbed a jumper from his bedroom. He pulled it on over his head as he walked out the door.

Once outside, he crossed the courtyard and climbed the stairs of Bucknall House. Number 48, she said. Once he got to the door to her flat, he looked around, puzzled. It seemed familiar for some reason.

He knocked on the door, and after a moment he heard someone coming to answer it.

"Did you forget your key again?" a female voice called.

The door was opened by a woman wearing a powder blue track suit. Part of her bottle blonde hair was pulled up in a messy ponytail while the rest hung loose around her face, and the heavy makeup she wore did nothing to disguise that she was about forty.

Bloody hell, it was that woman who had hit on him when he had come over to fix her tap.

Her hand flew to her mouth and her eyes grew huge. "Oh my God, it's you," she said. "She said it was, but I didn't really believe it. But it is, isn't it?"

"Is Rose Tyler here?" he asked, desperately hoping he had the wrong flat.

"No," she said, and he was relieved. Until she continued. "I expected her back hours ago. I figured she was with one of you."

He stared at her. The woman was obviously completely round the bend.

"One of me?" he asked.

She slammed a hand over her mouth again. "Never mind. Forget I said that."

"Does Rose Tyler live here?" he asked.

"Oh, yeah, you wouldn't remember that, would you?" she said. "Yeah, she lives here."

"So who are you?" He realized it came out sounding like an accusation, even to his own ears, but then the whole conversation was making him feel a little off balanced.

"I'm her mum," she snapped.

He sighed. He'd been afraid of that. "Can I come in?"

"Oh. Oh, yeah."

She stepped away from the doorway.

"I tried calling her, but I think her phone is off," he said as he entered the flat. "Either that or it needs recharging."

"Her phone is never off, and it never needs recharging. I've tried calling her for hours, just hours, all afternoon, but no answer. And she always answers, or at least rings back right away. Her not calling back hasn't happened since—well, never mind about that now. Anyway, I figured she was gone again. Although she usually says goodbye these days. Unlike the first time."

She got a strange look on her face. It almost looked like she was glaring at him, but that didn't make sense. Then again, nothing Rose's mum had said or done since he had arrived had made any sense.

"Well, sit down," she ordered as they made their way into the lounge.

He sat.

The messy, overly crowded room looked familiar, from its beat up fake leather furniture to the piles of gossip magazines and cheap romance novels piled on the coffee table to the mirror hanging on the wall. He told himself it was just because he had been here before, to repair the tap. But it felt like more than that. More like déjà vu, like there was a memory there, hidden, just out of reach. He had odd flashes of a plastic arm. And the table, but a different table, laying broken on the floor.

Weird.

He shook his head to clear the images as she sat down opposite him. An awkward silence fell between them.

"Look, I'm sorry," he said after a minute or so, "but I don't remember your name."

"My name's Jackie," she said slowly, as if she was talking to a child. "And you're the—never mind. What's your name again?"

"John," he told her, wondering if being here with her could be any more awkward than it currently was. Of course, she could proposition him again, he thought. That would definitely be more awkward.

The sound of the front door opening filtered through to the lounge. Rose, John thought, feeling a wave of relief. He stood, tamping down an irrational but almost overwhelming desire to grab her hand and shout run.

As Rose walked into the flat, she could hear sounds coming from the lounge. The telly, maybe, she thought, or maybe Stuart was over. "Mum, are you here?"

"Back here, Rose," Jackie called back. "Where've you been?"

"I left a note," she told her.

"Well, I didn't see it," Jackie answered. "All afternoon I've been calling and calling. The Do—John said that maybe your battery went."

"John? Is he here?"

She walked into the room. And her jaw dropped as she took in the man who stood in front of her. Clean-shaven, close-cropped hair, green jumper, twinkling blue eyes, and a wide grin.

It was her first Doctor.

[kieranoruadhain]

Awakening (Continued)

Short story WIP. Mature content warning. Parts 1-3: http://khyranoisin.tumblr.com/post/166063662238/awakening

four Months of routine came and went. No matter how hard or how long he was drilled for, Kyrahn was not a healer. Day in and day out, he failed. Any burst of Light that came forth in his hands always, always burned whatever it touched. He wasn’t sure if he would ever learn. Some days, he wondered why he was even here. He didn’t need to graduate, like some of the other students did at the behest of family, honor or country. He could just pack up and leave, if he wanted to.

But go where?         

For some, they were here because they wanted freedom. For others, it meant becoming a ranking medic in the Stormwind army. Some wanted to dedicate their lives to the Light and leave the Abbey as a licensed, freelance healer or preacher. Some, after graduating, might never leave the Abbey at all.

Others were simply here because they had nowhere else to go, and didn’t know what to do with their lives once they left. They knew, though, that whatever was out there must be better than in here. They would equip themselves with skills necessary to survive the world beyond, and leave with a hope that they could forge their life into something greater than what they were given.

Kyrahn was one of those. And that was why he still stayed.

The dreams still plagued him, as well as his friendlessness. Jackie and the others sometimes treated him well, but left him generally alone. The rumors would die down and spark up again, depending on how prominent he made himself during the seminars.

He was not outright mistreated, or hated, and he considered himself fortunate in that fact. But his peers didn’t seem to know how to speak to him, or approach him, because the same was true for him. He was a man of few words, and only bothered speaking if he considered it exceptionally important.

More often than not, he spoke in disagreement.

He’d disagree with his professors and peers on many points, often landing him in philosophical debates on the dichotomy of good and evil, mercy and justice, cause and effect. And the more grey his lessons became, the more uncomfortable he was. In his world of blacks and whites, there was always a shadow of relativity looming over him.  

An ultimate truth always remained inches from his grasp.

It was a breezy winter morning and the classroom was so cold, everyone sat huddled on the benches that encircled the lecture hall. Professor Heather paced in her usual manner, though she seemed a bit brisker in her movements today. She was probably trying to keep warm.

“Kyrahn Oisin,” were the first words she spoke.

Kyrahn stiffened where he sat.

“Do you remember, six months ago, when you let captive gnolls free?”

Kyrahn nodded.

“The female one is reported to have attacked a soldier naught several days ago.”

Kyrahn’s eyes widened. He felt the class’s eyes on him. “How did you know it was her?"

“The brand."

Kyrahn felt sick. He sat frozen in silence.

“The winter months have left many gnoll tribes in the area starved. Though the soldier survived, he reported that the gnolls who attacked him were trying to eat him.” Heather continued to pace. “My report states that when he went missing, several soldiers left to search for his patrol. They rescued him and slaughtered the gnolls in the campsite.”

“I knew we should have killed them when we had the chance!” Derick barked. “Someone could’ve been killed, Kyrahn! How could you have lived with that, huh!?”

Kyrahn buried his face in his hands, saying nothing.

“I don’t think he could live with killing a helpless child, either, even if it was a gnoll.” Heather spoke in his defense. “We, as servants of the Light, must face and accept this world of cause and effect. If we free the rabbit from the trap, we rob the fox of its meal. In this world, even our righteousness can be rewarded with agony. Such as the rain and lightning falls on the holy and unholy in equal measure, the consequences of good decisions may lead to bitter ends.”

“If… if that man died. It… w-would have been my fault… wouldn’t it?” Kyrahn said.

“In a way… yes.”

Kyrahn had no arguments that day.

Nor did he remember how he managed to enter the storage room at midnight with a rope in his hands.

He found himself looking up, examining the rafters, tugging a wooden chair behind him. His mind was blank, save for the image of a blood-soaked hallway, the landscape of his only recurring dream.

He didn’t hate himself. His life wasn’t awful. He would even say he enjoyed living, no matter the constant nightmares or the aching in his damaged leg. But he felt guilty for living. He couldn’t lie to himself anymore. Every day he lived was greeted with an overwhelming sense of shame, as though he was surviving on someone else’s time. He didn’t know why. He couldn’t explain it to himself.

And maybe it was for the best that he stopped trying.

He looked for a place among the rafters of the storage room to tie the rope. He’d figure out how to prepare the noose later. He finally found a good place- a hole in the wood that seemed strong enough to bear his meager weight. His hands trembled violently as he tried to tie the knot.

Don’t think about it. Just do it.

His hands were shaking too much. He couldn’t even stay properly balanced on the chair he was using to reach the ceiling. His peg-leg wasn’t helping matters.

Just as he was about to fit the rope through the hole, he heard footsteps outside. Every muscle in his body tensed and he yanked the rope free and tossed it as far as he could, where it landed behind some barrels.

The door to the storage room flung open and a whistling cook began to descend the stairs into the cellar. When he saw Kyrahn standing there on his chair, looking like a cornered mouse, he stopped whistling.

“Wot’re you doin’ in ‘ere?”

Kyrahn gaped like a fish out of water, searching for words. “Uh- I. I… w-was… trying to… reach that bread.” He pointed to a shelf conveniently close to where he was standing.

The cook gave him a skeptical look, then shrugged. “I’ll get it for ya, then. Get down from there, eh?”

Kyrahn stopped arguing during his lectures, and the next several weeks had left him more silent than he had ever been. He would not even answer when a peer asked him how he was doing, in that annoyingly casual way people start conversations when they don’t really mean what they’re saying.

Nothing triggered the desire. No particular incident, no particular murmur in the hallways, no particular recollection of a dream he was already so accustomed to. His decision was not fueled by hatred for his own life.

The slow, steady buildup of tension was the only source of his agony, like a droplet of water hitting his forehead in the exact same place for hours, days, months. Each drop carried a thought: "you don't deserve to live." And with each drop, the thought was absorbed deeper and deeper through his skin and skull until it permeated every ounce of his thoughts.

It was hard to concentrate on life when the only thoughts in his head was how to end it. No one usually locked the doors to the infirmary, where the more experienced healers kept first aid and natural remedies for more severe cases. He stole every vial he could find off the shelves, no matter what their labels said. Some were health potions, some pain relievers, some sleeping droughts- others he didn’t care to observe- he took them all. He stuffed his pockets with them and wandered away. Should he go outside? No… too risky. A night watch would notice him. He found himself in a nearby supply closet. He uncorked the vials, one by one, and drank them. All thirty-eight of them.

“I knew he was unhappy, but… this?”

A dull humming filled his ears, ceaseless. Occasionally, a voice broke the lull. His throat burned and scratched. He tried to will his eyelids open, but they wouldn’t budge.

“How we doing?”

“Still has a pulse. The treatment is working.”

Kyrahn’s attention lapsed. He could still hear voices, but they took no form in his mind. The dull humming in his ears droned on until he forgot it was there. An uncomfortable warmth and pressure filled his abdomen and he gave a soft groan.

“Kyrahn.”

Somebody said his name. He ignored it. His attention lapsed again. The warmth and the humming persisted. He might have been sleeping, or dying. Of that, he wasn’t certain. Maybe dying felt a lot like sleeping.

“Kyrahn."

Somebody said his name again. A different voice. Janice. This time, he fought. His eyelids fluttered and opened. Wherever he was, it was bright and the light stung his eyes. He closed them again, but she knew he was awake. 

“Can you speak?”

Kyrahn tried to respond. He managed a weak “hello”. His voice sounded like sandpaper. His throat felt like it, too.

“You’ve been in and out of consciousness for three days. You were on death’s door. You’re very fortunate someone heard you having a seizure in the closet naught a few minutes after you did what you did.”

Kyrahn blinked at Janice’s face, partially to clear his vision, and partially because he could hardly remember what she was talking about.

“I told you if you should remember anything, you needed to speak to me.” Her voice was strained with exhaustion. Kyrahn wasn’t sure if she was upset or annoyed.

“I don’t, though.”

“Then why did you do this?”

He didn’t meet her eyes. “A feeling.”

“What sort of feeling?”

Kyrahn didn’t reply. Janice then spoke.

“What do you remember?”

He still didn’t reply.

“Kyrahn.” Janice said firmly.

He looked up at her.

“Will you tell me what you remember?”

“Nothing. Just a feeling. Like I’m supposed to be dead but I’m not… and it’s unfair.”

The look in Janice’s eyes made Kyrahn uncomfortable. She seemed less upset and more disappointed.

“I did something very bad. Don’t try lying about it. Why else would I have no memories?  Why else would I know that I am supposed to die?” Kyrahn asked, though it seemed more like a statement than a question. “Did you do it? Did you wipe my memories?” Janice straightened a little. “No.” He watched her stony face. He wasn’t sure if he believed her.

“It doesn’t matter how you lost your memories. You’re a fresh mind in an old body now. So make something of it.” She said.

“I’ve not a fresh mind."

Janice’s expression hardened again and she straightened in the bedside chair. “You have two options. You can accept that you’re alive, and whatever regret you feel from your past, you can atone for it by doing good deeds and saving people’s lives. Become the greatest healer in Stormwind. Or, you can throw that away and die useless and alone. You won’t be appeasing any gods or souls, and I worry for your afterlife.”

When Kyrahn met her with lingering silence, Janice stood up. “I’ll be checking on you again in a few hours. I hope you’ve made a decision by then. And I hope you’ll make the right one.” five

Two weeks passed. On occasion, a student would shyly visit him- Jackie and a few girls, mostly- but he was left generally alone. He preferred it that way. Everyone in the entire Abbey knew what had happened and none of them said a word about it around him. What was there to say? “Sorry you almost died, glad you’re okay?”  As far as he knew, there wasn’t even any whispering about him anymore. That was perhaps the best thing that had come of the whole incident. Apparently the best way to free himself of the rumors and teasing and stares was to nearly die for it.  Janice made him promise that he wouldn’t do anything stupid again. She made him vow upon the Light’s name to pursue the healing arts and eventually leave the Abbey a full-fledged healer. She told him it was the sort of thing that would atone for whatever sins his old life bore. And Kyrahn almost believed her, if only he could succeed in doing anything other than destructive magic. He wasn’t sure he would ever succeed. He wasn’t always able to attend lectures or prayers, but he tried his very best when he did. But people kept a close eye on him. His peers, guards, the ranking priests- people were always watching him, as if expecting him to fly off the handle. It made him uncomfortable, and he wasn’t sure what to do about it. An exceptionally beautiful and green spring morning greeted the Abbey, and the morning found Kyrahn making his slow way from the early prayers to locate something suitable for breakfast when he was stopped by an odd sight near the entryway. Almost every student in the Abbey was lined up at the massive arched doors of the Abbey entrance. Kyrahn blinked, wondering just what he was missing. He made his way into the entrance hall, and the voice of Professor Heather became clear. “...to put everything you’ve learned into practice tonight. You will be evaluated by High Priestess Laurena herself. It is she who will determine which of you are ready to move up to the more advanced classes at the Stormwind cathedral. Any questions?” A student up front raised her hand. “What happens if we fail?” “‘Fail’ is a bit of an inaccurate term. Priestess Laurena will evaluate the areas in which you are lacking and will recommend that you re-take courses in those areas before accepting to see you again for a re-evaluation.” “So we WOULD get held back, then?” “Well, yes.” There was some fidgeting among the lines of students. As Kyrahn came closer, he heard the professor announce, “Well, let’s be off, then.” They began to exit the front doors, into the startlingly vivid outdoors. Kyrahn squinted in the light, then

he attempted to follow the procession of students. Professor Heather noticed this and stopped at the doors while the rest of the students were still leaving. Her eyes met his and Kyrahn froze. “Yes, Kyrahn?” “I… uh. Aren’t… I supposed to be going?” “Unfortunately not. You were not selected to attend.” There was an uncomfortable silence. Then, Kyrahn asked, “...is it because I missed last session…?” “No, it is because you are not ready. You’re very unwell.” Kyrahn puffed his chest out. “I’m ready.”

The professor’s voice came much more sternly. “No, you are not.” She states. “You almost killed yourself. You can’t cast healing spells. Your mind and your body are too weak.”

Kyrahn’s stiffened shoulders relaxed into a slump. Without another word, he turned, and headed back down the hall towards the dormitories.

Crickets sang their songs at the moon outside Kyrahn’s window. It must have been eleven-o-clock by the time the other men returned to the dormitories, all chattering excitedly about their evaluations. Kyrahn turned to watch the procession enter from his bedside, scanning their faces. When he noticed Jackie bringing up the rear, looking a little bit unhappy, Kyrahn stared at him. He seemed to understand the silent invitation to speak, and he came closer. “Did you fail?” Jackie sighed. “One of the categories, yeah. The, uh, defensive techniques. Shields n’ stuff have never been my strength… I wasn’t really surprised.” Kyrahn nodded. Then, he said suddenly, “I need you to help me get there.” Jackie paused. “Uh… what?” “She wouldn’t take me. Uh, Professor Heather. I want my evaluation, too.” “What, tonight? I’m tired, man- and the night shift will be different there.” “No, this morning. Early. Before anyone else wakes up.” Jackie pressed his lips into a thin line and looked away. “I can’t take you there, Ky. We’ll get in trouble.” “No one will have to know.” “Stormwind’s at least a three hour walk from here. By the time we get back, they’ll wonder where we’ve gone. Breaking curfew and all that…”

Kyrahn sighed and looked away. ��Right.” An uncomfortable silence lingered. Jackie broke it. “You’re not going to try to go alone, are you?” Kyrahn didn’t answer. Then, the faintest hint of a smile played at his lips. “You’re crazy! You’ll die! A single wolf will sniff you out and kill you with a bite to your ankles!” “I’m not that weak.” Jackie let out an exasperated sigh. “Fine, if you want to be all suicidal again, then do it! I’m tired of worrying about you.” With that, he headed off to his bunk, leaving Kyrahn to ponder in silence.

Morning came quicker than he was ready. Dressed in his best robes, Kyrahn slipped on his shoe, adjusted his peg-leg, picked up his walking stick and headed wearily for the doors. He descended the spiral staircase leading into the main hall, where he examined his environment closely. As usual, there was a night watch at the doorway, but he was quiet, unresponsive, leaning against the wall with his head against it. Kyrahn wondered if he was asleep. He snuck across the threshold and reached the heavy doorway. The night watchman didn’t even budge. Kyrahn grasped the handle of the door and pulled the latch, pushing it open. The creaking seemed all too loud, echoing through the hall. The guard against the wall muttered, but did not move. Kyrahn drew in a deep breath and escaped into the night air. He stayed off the road, in fear of patrols finding him. He slipped between the trees, heading for the walls which kept the Abbey secluded from the rest of Elwynn. When he saw the distant flickering of a torch, he stayed in the shadows until the patrol passed, before he continued on. However, just as he reached the walls, he heard a sharp whisper from behind him. He stiffened. “Ky!” He whirled around, catching sight of a familiar young, blond-headed man weaving between the trees. “Don’t forget me.” He said with a cheeky grin

[petestarebanks]

this turned into a lot of talking i’m drunk sorry

since i love talking about myself and i’m working on finishing all the random cider/alcoholic drinks in my fridge i appeciate @chitown-sounder for tagging me in this

1) How tall are you? I’m 5′7″ and I don’t have anything else to say about that. 

2) What Color And Style Is Your Hair? My hair is medium brown which is v boring I want to dye it like daaaaaaark brown in an attempt to match my fingernails and my wardrobe which are both slowly entering the shadow realm until I can finally take my rightful place as an all powerful witch of darkness where I belong. Lately I’ve been working on growing my hair back out, right now it’s just below the middle of my back bc a year and a half ago I decided I wanted to go back to the bob I had in senior year of high school. Generally speaking my hair is an awful mess.

3) What Color Are Your Eyes? Depending on the day/weather/my mood/the color of my shirt it varies between blues and greens and greys. I wish I was constantly crying so they could be green always. 

4) Do You Wear Glasses? Yeah and tbh people always ask me why I don’t wear contacts and like why the fuck would I? When I got glasses in the 10th grade (After 3 years of staring at a computer screen bc I got obsessed with writing and never wanted to leave the house I developed near-sightedness like a fuckin dope) I was hype af they somehow made my face look less round imo like honestly my glasses make me look older and less pudgy and I fuck with that shit. I, like my dawg Cody, also am getting new glasses in like a week or so (They’ll be in on the 11th and I’m reeeeady) and I got 2 pairs, one of which is the same rectangle shape I’ve always had and the other one is more fahionable and maybe I’ll like them??? I better bc they were expensive but they were literally buy one get one free so....... Idk they’re more round shaped I can’t wait to put new accessories on my face

5) Do You Have Braces? I never did and it’s funny I always had a fucked up dental situation ok my front 4 teeth on the top were shaped like |_|_/\_||_| it wasn’t a gap or anything my teeth were just angled like that??? Apparently there was a bone in my gum where it shouldn’t have been and it was keeping my teeth from growing right and so when I was like 8 they did a removal of all 4 teeth like - ya girl was in the third grade missing my 4 front teeth??????????? Embarrassing anyway they took out the teeth and when I went back a few months later to get the bone out there was literally no bone there? There was no explanation for it it just wasn’t there and my teeth grew back in perfect. My teeth aren’t perfect by any means like I have a severe overbite and my lower row has a small gap in the front and also I had a fuckin tooth that grew in the middle of the roof of my fucking mouth????????????????????????? Teeth are so weird anyway that tooth got taken out and I’m just here living with a semi-ok mouf now

6) What Is Your Fashion Sense? Whatever I feel like wearing when I get out of bed 15 mins before I’m supposed to be at work lmao whatever takes the least effort and still looks put together enough. There’s a lot of black and particularly black leggings bc they almost pass for dress pants which works for my job. Also a lot of camisoles paired with shawl/overshirt things idk what they’re called. And jean shorts whenever I’m not at work.

7) Do You Have Any Siblings? I have 4 step sibs and 3 sisters - my sister Candace is 28 and got married last year, we always argue about politics (we are on the same side but she is a realist and I’m a romantic) but we love each other even though she makes me cry from emotions and frustration. My step brother John is 27 and he’s always been a fuckin dickhead even when we were kids and they were just my neighbors and not my step sibs - yes my father is dating a woman who used to live across the street from us in the neighborhood I grew up in - He is v strong and has strong opinions, has a lot of tattoos and is a misogynist. My sister Jackie is 26 and is a human fucking landfill who I haven’t spoken directly to in 4 months bc she got mad at me when I showed concern about her boyfriend being abusive, then he did beat her ass and when I tried to talk to her about it she fuckin blocked me on Facebook. Oh yeah and she’s pregnant with his kid and won’t stop smoking cigars. Fucking landfill. My step sis Amanda is 23, always a good time even if she’s a super thot, she has 2 babies who I love more than anything and she lets men make a fool out of her more often than not. I love her. My step brother Chris is my fave step sib mainly bc he went from being an actual juvenile delinquent, arrested and then on parole at age 15 even, to being the first of his family to graduate high school on the same day as me, with a steady job and a wife and a baby and paying his own bills I’M SO PROUD OF HIM. My step sister Tory is 19 and she doesn’t have a real name she’s just Tory, is a bigger fuckin thot than Amanda literally this bitch is in the DM’s of every dude I know and I’m not shaming her like boo do whatever u wanna do but be better at it? Be a boss ass bitch and don’t let ppl make fun of u for being a human disaster?  My younger half-sister Dalaney (Literally, named after Dale Earnhardt thanks to my trash father lmao) is 11 and she lives with her mother in Minnesota. She comes to see us every summer and she is so fucking funny, she is a tomboy and she is a sassmaster just like the rest of us I love her sfm. 

8) What Kind Of Student Are You? I was an honors sudent, took AP classes and barely skirted by (But passed the final exams while my geek fuckin classmates sobbed bc they failed lmao) I graduated with a 4.89 so like, I was litty. I never studied bc why would i read the same thing twice? I also missed a day a week from 6th grade to graduation, bc I was “sick” but really I didn’t feel like going. My mom thought I was lactose intolerant bc I faked sick so much. One time Amanda and I let my mom drive us to school only to walk home (3 miles) and get stopped by a police officer 20 feet from my front door, he wanted to know why we weren’t at school and we lied and said we missed the bus but our moms were fine with us not going to school that day. That fuckin cop offered us a ride to school so we had no choice but to go to school after all that!!!! Then in senior year when my mom left me to live with Jackie I was literally missing 2-3 weeks at a time until the AP was like “If u miss 40 days of school this semester you will be considered a drop out” and I was like “Fuck” so I finished and graduated and never went to college because fuck the education system tbq fuckin h. 

9) What Are Your Favorite Subjects? Math, History, English, Human Geography. I loved learning, that was why I never wanted to be at school, everything was fucking boring but when I had the right teachers, in these subjects in particular, I actually wanted to be there. 

10) What Are Your Favorite TV Shows? I never watched TV until like the last year, I finally got a Netflix subscription and caught up on shit people have been raving about for years but I was completely late on - Shameless, Orange Is The New Black, American Horror Story, Bates Motel, How To Get Away With Murder, in particular. Otherwise I just watch sports. Literally the only reason I pay for cable is so I can watch sports. 

11) Favorite Books? BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH Scott WESTERFELD ANRD NEAL SHUSTERMAN. LIKE OK I’LL BE A HARRY POTTER STAN ALL MY LIFE. BUT. SCOTT WESTERFELD WROTE AN INGENIOUS SERIES ABOUT SOCIETAL STANDARDS OF BEAUTY (uglies/pretties/specials/extras) AND ALSO HIS VAMPIRE SERIES WHERE VAMPIRISM WAS TRANSMitted through sex and cats (peeps, the last days) WERE THE ONLY VAMPIRE BOOKS I EVER READ LMAOOOO. then, fucking neal. fucking neal shusterman changed my entire life for the better with a series about a future where the pro-life/prochoice battle turned into parents literally having the option of just, not dealing with their unruly teens anymore by having their body parts fucking dispersed to ppl who needed like new hearts, arms, etc (unwind/unwholly/unsouled/undivided) FUCKING ICONIC and also THE SERIES NEAL WROTE ABOUT KIDS WHO DIED AND WERE STUCK IN LIMBO BC THIS EVIL BITCH WOULDN’T LET THEM GO TO HEAVEN (everlost/everwild/everfound) GOD I LOVE BOOKS SO FUCKING MUCH OK. ALSO FOR MY NON-RELIGIOUS ASS EAST OF EDEN BY JOHN STEINBECK IS FUCKIN EVERYTHING. LIFE OF PI ALSO FUCK AND TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD BOOKS ARE GREAT.

12) Favorite Pastimes? If I’m not Netflix binging or watching sports or going to the movies with my friends or drinking with the one friend I have who I can drink with, I’m writing. I have literally 25 characters now I’m fucking trash but I love them all so much ok leave me alone. 

13) Any Regrets? Nah I think I’m the smartest most reasonable person on the planet so I think everything I do is right and not questionable at all lmao. 

14) What Is Your Dream Job? Huh. Hard to say. I’m doing something I love now, and my boss has been in the business for 20 years and his business pulls in 5 mil a year so like.......... I could stand to keep doing this for a long time. Honestly I’ve never had a direction in life so now that I found an occupation that I love I think this might be my dream job. 

15) Do You Want To Get Married? No lmao marriage is a patriarchal social construct and what’s the point? To legally be able to call someone mine? I don’t like people enough to want to spend my entire life with one. 

16) Do You Want To Have Kids? I never in my life want to give birth to a child. That shit is not for me. I have 5 nieces and nephews, a pregnant sister, and another sister who plans on having at least 2 someday. I don’t need no babies. I’ll be the cool vodka aunt who encourages my trash siblings’ kids to follow their hearts and encourages them to be gay if they’re feeling gay. I have always liked the idea of waiting until I’m like 40-45 and rich, and adopting a 10-12 y/o kid bc those kids never get adopted and I’ll just be the best parent to them. 

17) How Many Countries Have You Visited? I’ve never left the United States lmao. Fuck me right???????????????/

I have finished 3 bottles of beer/beer-like substance while writing this and the Rangers just fuckin lost go figure. I want @gingeronastick and @chrisarchers to do this and also whoever else feels like it ok ily babes