#i think i will. but not just yet. bc i wanna fix my shit in my fanfiction

[lovesickeros]

☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 4 ]

{☆} characters arlecchino, furina, lyney {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings blood {☆} word count 3.7k {☆} previous [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ]

Fontaine was bathed in darkness, not even the moon daring to illuminate where the common man fears to walk. The streets were bleak and empty save for the constant, rhythmic ticking and clanking of machines marching on endlessly, dauntlessly wading where even the bravest dared not to venture. Not even the sharp click of the Gardes boots followed the occasional hisses of steam as they walked the barren streets.

It was haunting, and it'd been like that for days now. It showed little signs of stalling in the slightest, too. Every inch of Fontaine was practically crawling with Gardemeks– like a swarm of rats skittering about.

Arlecchino had secluded herself in the Hotel Bouffes d'ete for days at this point, waiting– biding her time. Her nails clicked against the wood as she tapped at the table in a stilted rhythm, the subtle click of the clock mixing into the clanking outside, weaving in and out of earshot as the patrols slipped by. She reached forward after a moment of thought, reaching for the white king.

She leaned back against the chaise, tilting her head just enough to catch a glimpse of a patrol of Gardemeks as they vanished behind the rows and rows of buildings. It wasn't enough to keep her attention for long, however, her features twisting in disinterest as she glanced back to the chessboard– and the letter neatly resting beside it. The seal was unmistakable and a sobering sight, demanding her attention– the soft hues of blue etched into the shape of a dragon stared back at her in a way that almost unsettled her.

She had already parsed through it's contents hundreds of times, but she was met with only vague, flowing script that only served to irritate her more then anything– it filled the page top to bottom yet managed to say nothing at all. Her hand reached out again, but instead of reaching for the letter she plucked the black rook from the board, setting it down with a soft click.

Arlecchino had all the time in the world to sit back and observe her prey, but all that time would be useless if she lacked the information to act.

And he was quite tight fisted about it, evidentially. None of her inquiries or attempts to decipher any potential codes in the letter left her empty handed. She could not act without even knowing the reason for his summons– it was almost worded like a personal affair rather then one would expect for a foreign diplomat. In truth, she'd expected a scalding report on her operatives, but it lacked any mention of anything of the sort.

She was no stranger to people masking hostility behind pretty words and compliments, not that it was ever unwarranted per se– the Fatui did not create connections through honesty and genuine kindness. They have strong armed more then their fair share of people into cooperation to the point distrust is all the Fatui are met with outside of Snezhnaya. Every word was meant to conceal the deceit, every action meant to conceal the price later paid.

So she had been..skeptical of the letter, to put it lightly. She doubted the Iudex of all people would offer a hand to the Fatui without a price attached– a trap, perhaps, meant to lure in the most powerful piece left on the board. Her eyes narrowed, reaching for a white rook and moving it to the right.

Or he was hiding something. Something that he simply couldn't risk getting out to anyone, not even the Divine themself. A tempting prize, whatever it was.

..A dangerous prize, too.

She'd considered burning the letter and forgetting it all together– the risk was great, and she couldn't risk getting caught up by whoever else the Iudex may have on his side of the board. But she could hardly pass up the challenge and the prize that he fought so hard to keep from prying eyes and ears. Even her agents came back empty handed each time. She lazily picked up a black rook, sliding the white pawn aside.

"Lyney," Arlecchino drawled, crossing one leg over the other and turning her gaze to the door as it slowly creaked open. The pale visage of Lyney stepped through, though his siblings were noticeably absent. The weariness that weighed down on his shoulders was apparent in the slightest furrow of his brows and the subtle creak of leather as he clenched his fists behind his back. "Father." He choked out, the title dragged out by the sharp inhale and shaky exhale.

He looked out of breath, she noted.

The silence that lingered after the small exchange was punctuated only by the click of another chess piece being moved. She sets aside the black rook, letting it sit among the dozen other pieces that had been wiped off the board. She can see the conviction glinting beneath the fog of exhaustion, but if he would utilize it was another matter all together.

He had seemed to make his choice quickly, at the very least.

"Our contacts and operatives within the Fortress of Meropide have gone silent– all we have is their final confirmed missive.." His voice is confident, but it is rigid as the words spill from his lips. He takes a sharp step forward, unfolding his arms from behind his back and opening his hands– the small, water stained and messily folded note catches her eye, plucking it from his palms with a half hearted interest. "They believe the Duke left the Fortress of Meropide..and that he may be coming to the Court of Fontaine."

Her eyes narrow dangerously, nearly crumpling the thin paper in her hands– yet just as quickly, she collects herself.

But she cannot get rid of the bitter taste on her tongue, lingering as she sets down the note and slides it to the side, her lips pursed into a thin line.

So the Iudex had shown one of his pieces..she tightly grasps a black rook, tipping over the white rook, letting it roll against the board.

If the Duke was involved, things were much more complicated then she expected– he would be a problem, she was certain. She couldn't blame the lamb for fearing the wolf, either. Whether her agents had been killed or captured by the man mattered little. He had his ways, and he was a force that could instill fear in even them.

Which meant the possibility that her operation was already compromised was far too real.

What had the Iudex so concerned he had gone through the trouble of bringing in the Duke and herself? The Fatui was one thing, but to specifically request one of it's Harbingers..

The Prophecy? The thought had her clenching her fist, but..no. If it were to rear it's head now, the Iudex could simply not afford to waste time on his contacts deciphering his nonsensical script– If the prophecy were to be the issue, there time would be limited to mere minutes in the worst of cases. Which meant it was worth biding his time in order to ensure absolute secrecy.

So if not the prophecy, then what?

Her next moves were..limited. She was already walking on eggshells considering her position and the reputations of the Fatui– especially with a Harbinger in the midst. If they caught wind of her operations, they'd weed out her operatives and be on guards for any snakes that lingered in their garden.

She reached for the chessboard again, picking up one of the white rooks from the board with a scowl. The sharp click as she sets down the white rook and sets aside the black pawn draws a shaky inhale from Lyney as she moves another black pawn, the dull click of the pieces drowning out the distant clinking of machines.

..A draw, perhaps.

The pieces were all falling into place– the players of this game were slowly being revealed. Whether she could secure her victory..she was unsure.

She wasn't even sure who her opponent was. Only that the Iudex himself was but another piece in their game.

Arlecchino reached for the board again, yet this time she hesitated. Perhaps she could still swipe the win from beneath them, if she played her cards right.

She would simply have to capture the king– or, if need be, let it end on a draw. Either way, she would not concede. She could not afford to concede. Down to the last piece, she would drag out this match until she was in a position to force their hand into the outcome she desired.

She stood slowly, picking up the king piece and observing it for only the briefest of moments before she set it down on the table, taking measured steps around the table and across the room. She was hunting a much more dangerous quarry today– it would be no simple runaway traitor this time.

"Do you remember the directive?" She inquired coldly, her hand lingering on the door for that long, tense moment. "..Yes, Father." Lyney faltered, taking a hesitant step back and bowing at the waist. "Then do not stray."

All that was left was the silence and click of the door shutting behind her as she disappeared down the hall, her boots clicking harshly against the floorboards. The rest of the agents knew better then to linger in her path as she stepped down into the lobby, adjusting the cuffs of her sleeves. She barely even acknowledged the Fatui agent standing at the ready by the heavyset doors, their gloves hands held out with her cloak held loosely in their palms. She quickly snagged it from them, tugging it over her board shoulders and clasping it around her throat.

With a quick tug, she brought the hood up over her head to conceal her sharp features, lifting her hand and placing a neatly folded note within their waiting hands. She had only one chance to make the right moves and secure her victory– no matter the cost.

Each piece had it's purpose.

Oft, that purpose was a bloody and horrible end– but for the grand goal of the Fatui built on the backs of the dead, it was an honor.

She didn't bother speaking a word as she dismissed them with a wave of her hand, pushing open the heavyset doors and stepping out into the barren, damp streets. The rhythmic clink and whir of Gardemeks was still distant– she needed to move. Her boots clicked and splashed in the rain soaked stone of the streets as she slithered between the buildings, ducking through the openings in the patrols.

It was almost too easy.

She tilted her head back, taking in the towering Palais Mermonia with a scowl, her hands clenched into fists. The final moves were being played– the king was within her reach, yet she felt no more confident then when she began.

The air carried a sense of unease, thick and heavy, filling her lungs until she felt her breath still in her chest– listening to the empty, bleak night that seemed so..quiet.

She'd done her fair share of research, had more then her fair share of her agents try to peer into the Iudex's office or the Archon's supposedly hidden chambers, but every attempt was a failure. She had to give them credit, they were quite elusive when they wished to be. Though now she only thought about it bitterly– this was all a risky gamble, in the end, and only time would tell if it paid off.

With minimal effort, she'd managed to pull herself to the flat, tiled roof, eyeing the massive tower peaking out of the center cautiously. At least here the wandering patrols down below weren't likely to notice her..she could hear them passing by the spot she'd been in only a few minutes ago, just beneath her. She pulled the hood further over her face, peering through the sheer darkness of the night for any oddities, but it was almost impossible to see in the dark.

Her boots clicked softly against the tiles as she approached the tower jutting out from the Palais, her hand gliding along the smooth stone, pressing against odd indents or crevices. If it was for the Archon's chambers, she doubted they made it very difficult– she'd only met the woman once, but she doubted the Iudex make it all that complex just from a brief glance. And it surprised her little when one of the stones sunk into the wall, gears whirring as the walls split open to reveal a stairwell straight into an inky black hall. Only the barest hint of light peaked under the door at the bottom, but it's occupants must have heard her, considering it went out not a moment later.

She cautiously stepped down into the small crevice, her breath visible in the bitter cold air– her shoulders tensed at the subtle sound of muffled footsteps behind the door, her vision flaring with a molten heat between her shoulder blades as she reached for the worn handle of the door. The heat of her vision was enough to just barely heat the metal, her vision flaring like a quickly building inferno.

Arlecchino was prepared for a fight, if it came down to it.

The door creaked as she pressed against it, shoving it open with a grunt of effort and surveying the room with narrowed eyes and a biting remark on the tip of her tongue– the lavish opulence was expected, she supposed, but the lack of the towering figure of the Iudex was not.

Yet before she could get a word in or even take in her surroundings properly, the light flickered back on and she had to squeeze her eyes shut with a hiss at the sudden brightness. She could hear the door being shoved closed behind her, the hurried footsteps retreating just as quickly as her eyes adjusted to the light.

..This was a joke, wasn't it? It had to be.

She'd expected the Iudex, perhaps even the Duke if she'd been unlucky, not the Hydro Archon. She had half the mind to test her worth as an Archon then and there, her temper flaring like an uncontrollable blaze, barely kept at bay. It took all her self control to force herself to smile politely at the woman rather then snarl.

"Miss Furina," She sneered beneath her hood, x shaped pupils locked onto the startled, trembling Archon with thinly veiled contempt. "What a..pleasant surprise. You'll have to forgive my manners, I assumed I was meeting with the Iudex." She observed her body language carefully– the way her eyes darted about like a frightened rabbit seeking escape, the slightest tremble of her lips..

Arlecchino opened her mouth to offer another scathing remark, but her jaw audibly clicked shut as her entire body seemed to lock up. Even her vision went cold against her back, a chilling feeling creeping up her spine as someone, or something, crept up behind her. Their footsteps were almost silent, the slight rustling of their clothes the only thing she could hear over her heart pounding against her ribcage.

Arlecchino had always prided herself on being on the other end of that sensation– she was the monster, and her target was the prey frozen like a deer between the hunters crosshair.

It was a chilling feeling to have the dynamic shifted on it's head.

She couldn't even swallow, her jaw clenched so hard she could hear it creak as she tried to reason with her quickly splintering mind– a futile effort, her joints locking up almost painfully. Black spots were quickly swallowing her vision from the lack of air in her lungs, the sound of shuffling behind her barely audible over the ringing in her ears.

For a moment – a moment too long to have only lasted the seconds that it did, yet so quick it gave her whiplash – she thought she would hit the floor dead before she could even glimpse her assailant.

And then it was gone. She came crashing back into reality with a startled inhale, her lungs burning and her knees nearly buckling under her. The instinct to lash out and kill whoever had done it was intense, yet she couldn't bring herself to move even a finger– it would be so easy to twist around and ignite them with searing flames, but her feet were rooted in place.

She almost didn't notice the surprisingly gentle hands unclasping her cloak, tugging it off her shoulders, if not for the sheer intensity of the presence still lingering behind her. Her mind was still fractured, struggling to right itself after the ordeal, and it had her seething.

"..Are you certain you held back enough?" Furina croaked, the normally soft lilt raspy and almost hoarse. "Not– not that I doubt your capability, most Divine!"

Arlecchino felt her nails dig harshly into her palms, heat swelling beneath her skin– Divine? Had she lost her mind? The Divine was..

The Divine was upon their throne where they belonged. She'd seen them!

"Hm. Well, maybe? Sorry, I didn't think it'd affect you too." Their voice was sickeningly soft as they stepped around her like she wasn't even there, focusing their attention on the Archon who seemed more then delighted about it. "What gave you that impression, most Divine? Aha, I..was completely unaffected, as you can see! Perfectly fine."

Furina let out a small squeak when they pinched her cheek, but the almost affectionate smile that tugged at their lips revealed the lack of malice behind the action.

"You're a bad liar, Furina. You might want to sit down..please?" They didn't take her protests for an answer, gently pushing her to sit on the bed before abruptly turning to face Arlecchino once more, a forced smile on their lips. "Oh, good, you're..uh, not dead. That's good. I thought I fried your brain. Sorry?"

..Had she hit her head on the way here? The Divine should still be on their throne, yet she couldn't shake the weight of their stare– it felt tangible. She felt like she was standing face to face with the stars– galaxies and constellations bearing down upon her.

She grit her teeth and clenched her hands until she felt the sting of her nails against her palms, grounding herself in the pain through the sheer overwhelming nature of their existence.

"You.." She croaks, reaching out with a shaky hand and grabbing them by the collar of their shirt, lifting them up until their feet left the floor– she pays no mind to the startled protests of the Archon. Arlecchino would crush her like a bug before she even got the chance to intervene and they both knew it. "You shouldn't exist– you aren't them, and yet you..you're the imposter, aren't you?" Her grip tightens yet they face her without an ounce of fear, meeting her unyielding glare with a pondering look.

Arlecchino wanted to make them bleed just to see if she could, the urge to sink her teeth into skin welling up in her chest to the point she visibly snarled, her mask of politeness long . "You're the imposter." Her expression falls for a moment before she schools it into one of apathy, setting them back down and holding them there for a moment, finally releasing them after a tense moment. "Or you were supposed to be."

Hers brows furrow– she wants to demand answers, to throttle them for damning them to being nothing more then dolls for the supposed Divine to break at their whim, but none of the words come to her.

"..Why now? The current Divine has been in power for years, yet you descend now?" Her shoulders tensed, lips pursed into a thin line– it's impossible to ignore the truth that lay before her. The Divine is a fraud and this..imposter is the true Divine. How many years had they been in power, now? How many years were they waiting? Why did they wait? Was the suffering of Teyvat not enough? Was the blood that painted the steps of their stolen throne not enough?

She'd personally been on the wrong end of the Divine's wrath– she wonders..had they watched? Had they seen the cruel hand of their imposter and turned their back on Teyvat?

"I.." They hesitated. It made her seethe, her hands clenching into fists at her sides– her vision flickered, flames swelling within it's casing just to be smothered by the presence of the Divine. But once that spark had been lit, she refused to let it go out. "I didn't know."

The answer does not satisfy her. There is an itch beneath her skin that she cannot scratch, a fire that burns in her chest so hot it scorches even herself.

"And what about now? Are you content to cower like prey in the safety of the Palais Mermonia?" She snapped, taking a step forward, her brows furrowed and her glare intense– she can see the slightest bit of worry in their eyes. She revels in it. "Will you let them use your acolytes like pawns? How many more need to be broken on the steps to your throne before you act?"

Again, her vision flares and dims– it refuses to be used against the Divine that created it.

"Have you no answer?"

The room is silent. They do not speak and neither does she.

Even the world itself seems to quiet in the face of her accusations, fury boiling to the surface so hot it incinerated all it touched.

"I will kill them myself."

Their words are quiet, but they are not soft– there is a vindictive, searing anger that explodes out like dying stars within their eyes. The sight of constellations replaced by a void that would not be . The smell of ichor grows stronger– to the point she feels almost lightheaded.

"..I am aware that I have failed in preventing this, but I had no choice in the matter. Still," They muse, their voice like the tolling of bells. A solemn melody that stills the swelling fury burning in her chest, if only for a moment. "I will rectify it– I will tear down their throne of lies and let not even the earth tarnish itself by burying their corpse among it's soil."

They pause for a moment, holding out their hand– scarred and bandaged by the weapons of the devout, yet still they take upon the burden of dirtying their hands to save those who did not save them.

"Do you trust me, Arlecchino?"

Did she?

"Will you help me?"

She exhales heavily, meeting the starry iris' of the Divine with a scowl still tugging at her lips. Arlecchino trusted no one but herself.

"..Yes."

[starlooove]

The Jackie lives au in my head

[palms-upturned]

.

[orcelito]

Should I make a pinned post for my fanfiction stuff? If i keep making trigun posts & getting attention unrelated to my fanfics, I want ppl to be able to see my actual work!

But then again I almost don't wanna until I smooth out the date inconsistencies I realized the other day hfkdhdjd

[nicodaws]

. hi irls dont read this pls thanks . honestly no1 read this is so incoherent i just wanna put it somewhere bc im too in my head .

[smashingpunkkins]

god i hope i dont fuckt this up!!

[sems-diarie]

nothing just thinking of being pissy w aizawa bc u haven’t seen him in so long frfr

“you never indulge me,” you whine, the hem of your dress falling back to your thigh. something about the harsh look he gives you has you stumbling back a step. shota has always been.. harsh, blunt—about what he wants, what he needs.

you’re starting to think you aren’t in that category.

not a want, nor a need—shota sits in his study all evening and slots his arm around your waist in the dead of night, an afterthought seemingly. the act of spending time with you, of talking with you about more than just…

“work is.. pretty shit,” he wheezes. he hasn’t even looked you in the eyes yet. the hem of your dress is nonexistent, the cups of your bra tantalizing. your shota knows it’s all his; he takes his time drinking in the plumpness of you.

“i come home to sit you on my face,” shota grunts. he almost pinches the bridge of his nose. he’d rather come closer to you, keep you trapped against this mirror, in this little corner of the dressing room. “but instead,” he sighs, almost disappointed. “you wanna torture me. drag me out into the shopping center, into this tiny fucking dressing room—,”

“i like wearing things to your taste,” you hiss, eyes flashing his way. “sue me, husband.”

you huff when shota fixes you a look. it makes you try pressing back away from him, and right into the mirrored wall behind you. no where to go, you sit—pretty, pliant, and soft—between a rock and a hard place.

“and,” you try nudging him back at the chest. shota’s tits fill your tender hands splendidly, but your brickhouse husband does little more than clasp his fingers around your persistent wrists. “with the way you’ve been fleeing from me, how was i supposed to know you even wanted this kitty cat anymore?”

despite the inevitable blow to your dented heart, that shota would have little time for your petty wiles and longing hands, your fingers reach for him. despite the tenderness settling in your spine, you twitch when he steps closer. you’re aching, aching to melt into aizawa shota the way you need—the way he needs.

“sit me on your face?” you scoff, “when’s the last time we even talked for more than thirty seconds?”

“there’s nothing scary enough about you to send me running.” you want to strangle him a little when his words swirl through your ears.

“i know that,” your eyebrows pinch. “do you?”

[oh-no-its-bird]

hi listen i just had a divine intervention or smth lmk if you don't like it but

what if your team Ro time travel au + my time travel Tobirama

Team Ro would have memories of the canon and they got to this different timeline and there's Tobirama actively trying to seduce Uchiha fucking Madara. They didn't teach THAT in the Academy

They got in the time when Tobirama still orchestrated meetings, but Butsuma is already dead so if everything goes well, Tobirama would get Madara and peace soon.

And then there suddenly spawn a Hatake with a sharingan with 2 Uchiha kids and a Mokuton user. Political nightmare.

Later Tobirama recognises Kakashi and was like "The fuck? It's that Hatake from the war. What is he doing there, he should not have been born yet!!"

OHHH THATS SO GOOD THO???

I'm gonna be real I love the concept of "team ro time travel au but they time travel into someone else's time travel au," that's so good

If we go with your au, there's a really interesting immediate aspect of like: hey ! Tobirama might recognize Kakashi or maybe even Tenzo from the war, but these guys are way fucking younger than when they met !!!

Idk what exactly can be done with that but it's interesting to consider. Also Tobirama talked ab Itachi and his crimes before I'm p sure? So like he knows what happens to the Uchiha and that it was Itachi who did it for the village. I wanna see him faced w the kid who he once praised for slaughtering his own clan to prove his loyalty.

I wanna see him feel the consequences of the stress Itachi is under when he (and possibly Shisui) attempt to kill Madara.

Stop interfering with his fix it fic you brats!! He's already got it covered!! You're just causing a mess!!!!

They get zapped in, like, in the middle of Tobirama's happy ending epilogue too. Tobirama is peacefully eating dinner in his house w his new husband Madara thinking "well. Alls well that ends well." Then BOOM Kakashi Shisui Itachi and Tenzo crash out of fucking nowhere directly onto their table, getting covered in food and breaking the table in half

Immediatley arrested !! I feel like Tobirama would instantly understand what happened by recognizing their uniforms + potentially Kakashi + he's already a time traveler himself so it's really no stretch for him to go "oh fuck I didn't think we'd get a double jepordy in this bitch but I guess not"

But like it's not like he can just SAY that ? Or he could but it would bring a lot of questions he probably does not want to answer.

Now another problem arises in like. I don't think Tobirama is especially attached to any of these guys. I can see him maybe having a lingering "pay it forward ig" feeling just bc they're "loyal konoha soldiers" and it'd be a waste to let that resource just burn. But also like. Under no circumstances can Tobirama have these guys share certain aspects of future knowledge.

Tobirama worked so hard to get here !!!! Literal years of planning !!!! He got his happy ending and it very much rests on Madara staying safe and sane and NO ONE IMPLYING HE WILL BETRAY KONOHA EVER !!!!! Tobirama does not even wanna RISK that becoming a rumor, he will take no chances.

Anyways I think his best course of action would be to reveal himself as a time traveler specifically to team ro, then position himself as their hokage who they should remain loyal to, say that it is for Konoha's best interests that they do not reveal certain things, and play it by ear from there.

Tobirama deciding he can't risk team ro going forward in time again and potentially fucking up the time stream or smthn. They need to stay here. He can not risk losing this shit. Sorry guys it looks like your trapped here <3

Anyways team ro being scary loyal to him bc he is the closest approximation to their (current?) Hokage and only person w the knowledge to enforce that power over them (at this time)

In my original post, like, all of team ro are already established to be kind of at their worst and most loyal to the village at that point to. They are at THE age(s) to be manipulated like that tbh, rip

It's not too bad tho. I think Itachi would feel relieved but also very guilty. Shisui too. Tenzo is violently neutral bc hes still in his "learning to be a real boy" phase from root, but it's all positive for him tbh. Kakashi is tricky bc his mental state is the equivalent of someone rapidly bouncing a ball on a thin pane of glass trying to prove it's bullet proof (it's not) and has like MOUNTAINS of complexes around the words "konoha authority figure" and what he's leaving behind. He's probably the most determined to go back

Anyways uhh. Izuna gets Itachi to help him be skeptical of Tobirama and spy on him. Itachi only agrees bc he violently reminds him of Sasuke (this will develop into a complex if not stopped. Shisui is working on it.)

[reikunrei]

feeling incredibly averse to posting this but i'm just gonna drop my kofi link here in case anyone wants to help me get out of my increasingly shitty situation living with my parents

more info below ig

after having given my parents nearly $100k over the last four years, i'd love to be able to actually leave. my future job situation is still up in the air (i've submitted for about a dozen positions and the only one i've heard back from and interviewed for hasn't gotten back to me yet), and i haven't been able to build up any savings because, again, i was (and still am) helping my family afford rent and bills, and probably the taxes my parents are behind on, but if i think about that, i'll get too angry. no joke, i've given my family, at the bare minimum, 85% of my income over the last 4 years. the rest of it has gone toward medical stuff and, now, my car

at this point, with the combo of my mom refusing to lower her standards and my dad's seeming refusal to hunt for a new full time job, i don't see how they won't continue to bleed me dry. my dad even has a bad habit of taking money out of my old savings account that he's a joint owner on or whatever from when i got it set up when i was 16, even when i stopped actively putting money in it, so now any time it gets its automated $1 transfer from my checking account, he'll just take that $1 without consulting me. i'm not exaggerating, even if it has $1-2 in it, it'll be gone within a week

i've even put off starting on testosterone because of this. i wanted to start it like 3 years ago, but kept putting it off because of money issues and wanting to save as much as possible. i got really close to actually starting it this year, but because of how messy everything is, i put it off again bc having one more thing on my plate, especially when my parents are already weird about me being trans, was not something i wanted to deal with

not to mention, we're still currently not living under a lease in our house that we're, as far as i'm aware, still tens of thousands of dollars behind in rent on (again, my dad refuses to disclose our financial position honestly with any of us) and it's developed many, many issues bc the landlord, even before we were behind on rent, is shit and refuses to actually fix anything. and my dad loves to just ignore things unless we beg him to do something

i'd love to be on my own (in the, much more affordable, midwest) by the end of summer. i by no means want to rely on donations and i have other avenues i'm working with to make money (i still have my current full time job, but i'm going through my old belongings and selling a lot online), but i'll take any help i can get atp because i'm truly at my wits end. i'd start doing art commissions again if i could, but doing that from 2020-2022, partially on top of my full time job, absolutely wrecked my right hand and i'm still in enough pain that i can't make it a regular activity

idk how much else there is to say. there's more i could say but... i don't really wanna air all my dirty laundry here. i'm miserable in so many ways and it's just become increasingly clear that my dad expects me to constantly cover his ass. my younger brother gives money too, but he manages to go on big cross-country and overseas trips with friends, so i think i've been stuck with the burden of giving the most money. there's so many more things going on in the world rn and everyone is stretched thin so i don't expect much, or anything, but. idk. might as well throw it out there, right?

i’ve also since taken down the gfm i set up last year when we got our first eviction notice bc, while we still need the money, i don’t feel right keeping it up for multiple reasons, including “i don’t want to give any of that money to my family” and it feels too… serious to keep it up when i could just throw out my kofi instead

i just want to make sure i have some sort of safety net to catch me if i move before anything job-wise is finalized. i need to be able to afford a place to live for at least a month so i can job-search while physically being in the area i wanna move to, which would ultimately make it easier for me to find a job at all. i'm working on being more firm with giving less money so i can actually have the means to move and be safe and comfortable, but... that never lasts long in this house

anyway. that's it, i guess. thanks for reading

[killzenin]

Dude u should totally make a third part on the sugar daddy gojo/nanami fic but this time its only nanami 😋yum love me some nanami fic what u wrote was delicious i devoured that shit like it was the last meal on earth bro the aftercare was my fave part

ive rewritten this a thousand times as well as procrastinating it bc i didnt think it was good enough, and kinda still don't think it is *dies from impostor syndrome*. though this msg made my day thank you and i hope you like it as well as sorry for the delay.

۫ ⋆ ࣪.afab!reader, implied sexting/nude sending, sex toys, cowgirl position, lingerie, jealousy, teasing, fingering (m→f), Nanami's pull out game's strong here 💪 ۫ ⁎ .

★W0RD C0UNT: 1.5k ★

★𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗧 𝗢𝗡𝗘 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗧𝗪𝗢★ (i recommend u read them first)

you pressed on the ‘sent’ button on the message app, flipped it on the cafe’s table so the screen was not on display and took a sip of the bitter coffee. awaiting patiently for the shit storm to unfold with a devilish smile on your face.

you sat comfortably in the opulent yet cozy space, scrolling away on your phone. and a few minutes later as if on cue, the blond showed up to the shop agitated. nanami’s eyes settled on you sitting in a corner near the window. your wave at him across the room persuaded him to reach where you sat.

nearing you, he holds your chin, maneuvering it to face him and places a delicate kiss on your lips. even though he ached for more than that, far more than what he's done. “humor me, beautiful, let’s get out of here,” he started, and subsequently leaned to whisper in your ear. “and let me wreck that pretty pussy while wearing that cute lingerie you bought.”

you chuckle, “whatever you say,” holding on to his hand nanami began to lead you out, “bought it just for you.”

⠀⠀⠀⠀     ̟ ˙ ̟ ˙ ˖ ̟ ˙ ˖ ˙

"moan for me more, princess." nanami's thick fingers eased themselves in and out your entrance vigorously and his palm rubbed around your clit just right. encouraging you to be as vocal as you wished, though you were fearful. after a hot make-out session on the ride to his home, nanami was called in for a meeting.

but he did not fret in the slightest, it was through a video call after all. that is why he had your back facing his chest, with your legs spread apart and squirming on his lap as your arousal dripped down on you, creating a small, wet stain on his fashionable pants.

with the camera and audio off his other hand ventured to play around your tits. pinching and teasing around your nipples so that they would perk up to his liking.

your lack of vocality made his face scrunch into a displeased frown, your pleasure was his after all. "you can be as loud as you please, gorgeous, they won't notice. i promise." he pinched around your hardened nipple to get a rise at you. which worked, making you throw your head back on his shoulder and squeal in his ear.

"that's it, pretty thing, love the way you sound." he teased followed up with kisses around your exposed neck. his gaze then fixed itself on the small bag near his laptop. the blond was so hot and bothered that he forgot to put the cute lingerie on you.

he reached for the bag and placed it on your lap. “i wanna see you put it on, darling.”

your mouth curved at his words, shoving your desperateness to be ravaged all the way at the back of your mind. you stood up to undo the little clothes left on your body, taking the set out and shoving your previous garments in the bag.

nanami’s brown eyes glinted in delight, observing as the dark blue began to drape around your figure. proving the live spectacle to be even better than in the picture you had previously sent. classy fabric patterns adorned your skin, barely, but in nanami’s view you were just perfect.

your cunt was exposed only holding itself by the way it hugged your waist and the hook it had connecting to some knee-high socks. a vertical slit ran down the bra cups, letting your nipples on full display.

nanami's dick twitched at such a sight, pleading to be set free and find comfort inside you. “do a spin for me, gorgeous.”

doing as told, you did a full 360 circle on the spot slowly. coming back to your original spot you stretched your hand to him.

the blond yanked you towards him, setting you on his lap to straddle on it. "let me have you, hmm?" the sides of your waist began to be caressed by his touch, easing you as he spoke. "they will never know."

you mimicked his caresses on the sides of his neck, making him feel pure bliss by your touch. "then, how about i take care of you."

nanami’s persuasive speech finally made you give in. his shirt was swiftly unraveled, as well as the upper part of his pants and briefs. the blond's thick shaft bounced towards his stomach once set free, your delicate touch provoked precum to leak uncontrollably from his tip and heavy breaths to drop from his lips.

you observed the mess you made him in delight. your hand smeared around the precum, starting from the top, coating it around as best as you could.

noticing, nanami opened a drawer at the side of his office desk, revealing a variety of sextoys and lube. sparkles reflected in your eyes looking at such a packed drawer with such nasty toy options. "i know how much you love to fuck here." he says.

"i'll never get disappointed with you." you mused, kissing his lips and grabbed whichever lube was closer. nanami took your words to heart and ego, he bet you have not told these or any similar words to gojo. and he'll make sure you will never utter such words to that man child.

you made sure the cold lube was enough for it to fuck with ease. "lay back, baby, i'll do all the work this time." you say hovering on him, nanami liked his chairs to be reclinable as a means to rest in between late-night work shifts. you hovered over him while lying him down and playing around with his tip on your slimy pussy folds.

nanami’s head flew back and held deep moans back at your teases, feeling himself rub against your clit. though he was not patient when it came to getting inside you. he was precautious sliding himself in until he finally reached to be fully installed between your legs. nanami’s mind spiraled by the melody of your low moans, evidencing the pleasure he gave you while slowly grinding and moving your hips in circles on him.

"c'mon baby, if you wanna take good care of me, bounce on my cock." you released a sigh of pleasure as you smiled to yourself. beginning to slide yourself up and down on the blond you felt yourself tighten around him, taking in how he filled every inch of you.

continuing your bouncing motion your calves and thighs began to ache but the gratification of pumping his dick overrode the pain, blending itself with the increasing pleasure. 

though the blond could see your face scrunch in mild discomfort, his hands gripped around the flesh of your hips and with intense motions began to pound you to him. his firm grab on you, as well as his rapid thrust to your cunt blew your mind into oblivion.

the chatter of the laptop faded, thumping and squelching of wet skin and filthy moans engulfed nanami’s office and your minds. not caring for the people displayed on the screen talking of whatever statistics they were on about. 

“na-nanami ughh, m-more. please~ baby more! you're s-so goo~d nana.” more, more, you needed him to the fullest, you needed to reach your sweet orgasm soon. you wanted to gain your high desperately from him. 

listening to your orders, nanami composed himself and reached for the drawer he previously opened with the stash of toys. not forgetting to ravage on your lips as he collected a wand vibrator. 

that vibrator found itself being set to the highest mode and rested in between your legs. “hold it darling, while i fuck your cute cunt.” 

shaky hands held onto the toy, and once you pressed it on your clit and his base, something just snapped. electric shocks reverberated through your bodies and reacted in desperateness to finally orgasm. beads of sweat started to drip on your bodies as his thrusts and your grinding turned sloppy. 

you came after some thrusts, not caring if you lasted too little. your juices began to leak around and settle on the blond’s pelvis. drunk in such ecstasy you continued to ride nanami as the vibrator kept your oversensitive clit going. though as you reached your orgasm your pussy contracted in such a way nanami wouldn't pass the opportunity to piston himself and bury as deep as he could in you. 

but before he could relieve himself, nanami pulled out of you remembering the lack of a condom which should be wrapped around his cock. white strings of his cum shooted out of him to rest on your stomach. 

just as he pulled out you flopped on his chest, relatively exhausted and you could tell he was as well. “love the way you fuck me old man.” you teased, remarking the way he was as tired as you. 

he held back a laugh at your joke. “let’s rest for the rest of the meeting and continue… i want to eat you out with that set.”

“all right, all right.” you say, snuggling close to his frame as you both listened to the boring meeting.

reblogs are deeply appreciated🩵 more works here!

[xotication]

☆,

i’m bored nd tired of videogames so here’s some more of what type of man i think kaneki is..

okay. when you & kaneki first meet, you have to break him into a LOT of things. one time you guys were texting nd he said something funny.. so you keysmashed & poor baby was CONFUSED.

“y/n are you okay..?”

having to explain it to him made the situation all the more funny but awkward at the same damn time. it’s a hassle having to explain gen z things to this man LMAO.

you had him download instagram, tiktok, even snapchat & learning how to use them was such a drag to him.

“why do you like this stuff anyway?” he says but a week later he’s sending you his entire fyp all like “HAGAHAHA BABE THIS IS SO FUNNY” like boyyy.. wasn’t you JUST talking shit?! at one point he even takes it upon himself to upload silly lil vids & they start to go VIRAL. he doesn’t understand why bc half the time he’s just talking about you & explaining diff things he doesn’t understand about girls.

“my girlfriend asks me really dumb questions all the time, i don’t get it.. how does your brain come up with that?? what on earth do you mean by ‘would you still love me if i was a worm’ like what?!” & then there’s just girls in the comments sending thoughts nd prayers for his poor soul.

basically, kaneki becomes a whole different person after dating you for just a couple months. he adapts damn near all your habits nd it’s the most endearing yet hilarious thing ever.

for example: say he’s talking about a girl or boy & you give him a nasty look bc.. why is he talking about OTHER PEOPLE?! eventually when you start having story times that include someone else, he gives you the MEANESSSTTTT side eye ever. it’s insane.

& don’t ever ask him about it either. “why’re you looking at me like that?”

“idk, why’re you conversing with people who aren’t me?”

“ken, i have to socializ-”

“says who?!”

not only that, but kaneki is airheaded when it comes to people. like if the man doesn’t like someone or something. it shows all over his face.

one time you guys were out eating, & he thought the waiter was being a lil too friendly.. manz was making the most uncomfy faces ever. 😭

“ken- fix your face?!”

“i’m sorry! i’m trying my best.” you guys both whisper yell.

ken gets a house kitty, & when you’re not home, he makes one of those, “gf isn’t home.. yk what that means.. OPTIMUS PRIME ON THE COUNTER” tiktok’s & thinks it’s so funny.

also, when you’re not home, this poor manchild is so bored.

he could read books upon books in a day & still be dying. it’s not until he hears that front door unlock that he feels freed from the shackles that are his boredom!

ken loves to annoy you, he loves to be around you, he loves to look at you, to touch you, any & everything to do with you- he loves.

not to mention.. he begs you to build legos with him. when you agreed, he made it a whole little picnic date & made sure that the weather would be perfect… he also made you swear to not leave the park until the whole lego set was completed.

kennie baby is soso cuteness.

posting my drafts cuz my brain doesn’t wanna work nowadays. 😫😫😫

[cravingstudyvalidation]

26/1/2024 (rough week, in desperate need of a hug)

yea so ladybird was right about that, been feeling very depressed for the past few months actually, nothing really makes me happy anymore. I swear I've been trying to find joy in the smallest things but it's been really hard. I have never talked about this before but I was diagnosed with su1c1dal depression a few years back, it was really bad but I did get better, some days worse than others and it started getting really bad the last few months. I don't have the drive to do anything, and studying has been especially hard but somehow I managed to pass my exams last term with decent grades and I've already got my term 3 exam timetable as well.........

there's really no other option other than to just keep going, I don't have time for breaks or shit bc like AS levels are just so far away yet so near and I have to start preparing for it srsly.

not really big on goals for this year, so here r the 2 goals that I want to or attempt to do this yr:

get over my fear of math(math was and still is my most feared sub and I think my fear of it is what makes me hate it and stops me from doing well in it, so I really wanna get over that fear this year, not completely but just get somewhat confident in it)

fix my sleep schedule, like get actually 7hrs of sleep every day and not just have a 3-4hr nap before waking up for skl

If you made it till here, thank u, ily and I hope u have a nice day xx.

[willow-lark]

lark's recently-read byler fic recs

thought people could use some uplifting 💕🫶 please remember to hype up your favorite fics and art and other creative work & remember there's always something new to enjoy!! browse the tag or ao3 page & give someone's work a some love!! xoxo

If Time Runs Out by @rainypebble07 (T, ongoing, 14k+) - BYLER PIRATE AU!!! 🏴‍☠️ i literally just discovered this one today and i'm actually obsessed. i have never seen any other pirate aus (🤨) n i just wanna say u guys are missing out on the concept and on this fic bc i'm so invested. i'm so excited to see where this fic goes. royal mike x pirate mike is SO GOOD.

how to get your crush to believe you love him: a guide by mike wheeler by @newlesbianprideflag (T, 3/4, 11k+) - mike goes across the country to visit will at college in an attempt to confess his feelings to him. will, who has a boyfriend already and would like to think himself very over mike, thank you, is not impressed. this one deconstructs a lot of popular/fanon tropes and is really great so far!!

california show your teeth by @fireflywitch (T, 8/19, 63k+) - ok this one mayyybe only has background byler but i'm reccing it anyway bc it's one of my FAVORITE regularly updating fics maybe EVER. in early 1985, chief hopper and his average, normal family move from lenora hills, california to hawkins, indiana--the latter of which has had multiple tragedies over the past few years, to which the new chief's family may or may not be linked. LIKE WHATTTT 👀 go read it RN. masterpiece

All Good Dogs by @hellfiremike (T, 1/1, 3.8k) - this one actually made me cry. featuring: an EXCELLENT character study of will byers, a heartfelt examination of canon and what comes after, and chester the dog getting the attention he deserves and never got in canon 😭

kiss me (try to fix it) by birthofv3nus (T, 1/1, 4k) - will has kissed every member of the party except for mike, who is, understandably, taking this news *SO* well and is not jealous about it at *ALL.* but maybe his situation is not quite as dire as he believes it to be....ugh this one was such a fun read, and you know i loveee party dynamics!!

drank my poison all alone by silverluminoqity (T, 1/1, 4k) - mike is going through it, and, though vecna seems to have been vanquished, maybe he's not so completely gone as everyone thinks.... this is an excellent exploration of both mike's guilt as well as his evolution as a character, and how he views himself. super in-character and super good!!

high tide came and brought you in (and i could go on and on) by silverluminoqity (T, 1/1, 8k) - MOTEL FIC MOTEL FIC MOTEL FIC 🥳 or, mike and will have yet another heart to heart, and some things are revealed. this fic is just so completely heartfelt and UGH i was MELTING the ENTIRE TIME, holy SHIT. probably in my top 3 motel fics EVER tbh.

Chasing Heartlines by @cherryisgone (T, 1/2, 6k+) - i was so excited to read the first chapter of the sequel to maybe one of the best byler fantasy aus ever!! knight mike pining after prince will is something that can actually be so personal to me. i love a good mike-won't-shut-up-about-will fic. the attention to detail in this fic is actually INSANE.

[karoochui]

I just wanted to say I am so enamoured with Binary Insurgence! I eat up everything, every little crumb, you drop about it and the entire idea is so interesting to me! I'm so in love with stories and worlds like this! I'm also curious to know about the relationship between Sun and Moon, if it's alright to ask. How was it before the fire compared to after? Does their relationship begin to mend (because I'm certain over the years it deteriorated) when y/n comes back into the picture? If any of this is too spoilery or you just haven't fleshed it out yet then you don't have to answer! I'm just super curious about the boys and how you see their dynamic/relationship. I just look forward to seeing how their bond has grown and/or broken and how it may be mended over time.

AHH im glad you like it so much!! Im happy to talk about what i've got, but you are right not everything is fully fleshed out. I have points i wanna get to but while im brainstorming and planning i make up a lot of stuff as i go and then go over it again later to see if i like it or can connect stuff in any way. I have 3 chapters for Arc 1 fully summarized as of now! (Which probably doesn't seem like a lot but i like my chapters long, so it's quite a bit actually).

I wanna say, too, that i'm planning for the first story to be more in the perspective of the reader, so most things about Sun and Moon's personal thoughts and feelings are gonna be more implied than said. I might have some switching points of view, i'm not sure, but i haven't found a place i'd do it or think it's relevant. The sequel is gonna be more from their perspective since it'll mostly be about them.

NOW! I see Sun and Moon as brothers, so they really treat each other in a way that's like that. Before the fire they get along pretty well. Most instances of issue would be when Moon blocks out Sun when he fronts, or just mutual panic over the fact Moon lost his shit w/ the virus. They'll have their disagreements about things (i havent planned specifics yet) but generally they're chill. Sun just worries about Moon hurting people, but Moon worries too. With the way the virus functions in this AU it's hard for Sun to fully fault Moon for what he does, especially because he's also affected by it but not nearly as bad. (I'm gonna explain this more in another ask i have).

Plus, even before the virus they were always glitch/bug-ridden because technicians fucked up their programming continuously after removing them from the theater to work in the daycare. So they had to kinda navigate through that together, glitches and errors on both ends (though not deadly). They hate P&S bc of this, obviously. Hardware fixes suck but they fucking HATE software examinations.

Later on though some issues come into play whenever Sun starts getting worse by being further exposed to the virus (it gets worse for him when they eclipse) because it presents itself in Sun differently than it does Moon. He gets snappier and angrier at times (that comic i made that's captioned "well someones snappy") and while they both understand he doesnt mean the shit he does it's still not great. And nobody's gonna just let themselves be talked to like a dog even if the reason it's happening is because of something the other person can't really help. They're still relatively fine at this point, though.

It's at the end when shit goes really bad, because this part of the story does end badly. I won't spoil specifics but after the fire Sun loses his shit. He starts trying to put the blame on Moon for everything (the virus enhancing his already bad habits/fucking with his line of thinking) out of grief and anger. That carries over into the apocalypse and he just gets worse in general. He gets irrational.

It's a long period of time though, so he eventually also manages it, in his own way. But! I did say before in an ask that in the sequel he's "not evil, persay, but he's a fucking nut". He damns Moon to an hourglass to just fucking get rid of him about 100~ years before they meet you again (he fully thinks he's in the right for this (and he also just hates him) and the only reason he really even stayed around after that was to make sure Moon didn't get out again). He's not a bad-intentioned individual, but he's off the fucking wall at many times bc of the virus having made him worse. He's stubborn as all hell to an infuriating degree, he's irrational, hard-headed, reckless, and while a good bit of his old, kinder self is still pretty prevalent he can be downright fucking mean if provoked. Again, worse than before, and it doesn't take much these days! I always imagined him to have more dramatic, snappy, diva aspects to his personality (even before Help Wanted 2 came out) bc hes so theatrical and intense, so basically take a Sun that's like that, crank it up to 100 and put him in a Bad Situation. That's what Round 2 Sun is like at his worst. He's not a complete lost cause though, and he's far from dumb when he does stuff, just clouded by his own judgement. He doesn't think anything's wrong with him (or does he?).

Moon doesn't really hate him like Sun hates Moon, because although he knows that what happened (the ending of the first story) is technically both of their faults he just feels guilt. They do fight a lot, though. Most of it is Moon trying his best to tell Sun that he's basically full of shit and not seeing things right after Sun starts something, but Sun's at the point where he's gotta learn by consequence. Part of the reason he's so bad is bc 1: hes been infected by the virus for so long now and 2: in his grief, anger, and resentment he's learned to live with it rather than fighting it.

But the sequel is gonna be a feel-good story! Falling in love w/ the reader all over again, i want things to get cleared up - or at least some kind of middle ground between Sun and Moon - the whole sha-bang.

[wonwoosthetic]

Amour-Haine & Co. | Chapter 18 |

series masterlist

word count – 15k

warnings – mentions of sex, mentions of sa (I tried to keep it brief and not mention it an unnecessary amount of time), cursing, screaming, law enforcement related things

a/n – I have nothing to say other than thank god this finally made its way onto tumblr😭 I’m still not 100% satisfied with it but I feel like if I edit it any more, it’s only gonna get worse😭😭 pls enjoy this, thank you for everything🫶🏼 BTW: this chapter includes A LOT of law enforcement and court terms and scenes, but since I am no expert in that field, please be prepared for inaccuracy! If any one you have more experience in either one of these subjects: please let me know!! If I can make it any more realistic, I’d love to do so!! Also: thank you to the anon who inspired me for the Jeonghan turn🫶🏼🥰 when I first outlined the story, this was definitely not planned but after seeing their request in my inbox a few months ago, I just knew I had to include it, so I hope you enjoy it🤍

fyi – not much lovey y/n x wonwoo in this chapter, but don’t you worry bc there will be more than enough in the next ones ˙ᵕ˙

“I’m proud of you.”

"Mmmm," Binna's enjoyable moan echoed through your ear as she took the first sip of her second cocktail that night - she had downed the first one within the first 10 minutes of sitting. "Long day at work, don't wanna talk about it," she commented on it as soon as she found your questioning, and slightly concerned, gaze on her.

You couldn't help but chuckle as you continued to sip on your first cocktail of the evening, your food still untouched next to you. By now the steam had already evaporated, and the ice in your drink had melted, watering down the burning taste of too much alcohol the trainee bartender had graciously given you. 

Your eyes were fixed on her and the lowering level of liquid in her glass as it went down and down with every sip, coming to a halt just right to make it half-full. "Are you sure, you're okay?" You questioned her carefully.

She hastily nodded, wiping her hands, now covered in salt from her fries, with a white napkin. "Yeah, yeah," she brushed you off before placing both of her palms on the surface of the table, slightly leaning forward with a smirk. "Now tell me, how's playboy-turned-loverboy doing?"

"Good. I think," you slyly answered, reaching out for a fry, which was interrupted by a harsh slap on the back of your hand, making you wince as you snatched it back. "OW!"

"Don't fucking say 'I think' as if you don't see him at work all the time and sleep over at his place every second day," Binna snapped at you. What you hadn't told her was that Wonwoo had also asked you to come over that evening, but you decided to cancel, remembering the date you and your best friend had already agreed on.

With wide eyes, you shrugged, "Yeah- well- I don't know. I think he's doing well." You knew the unknown was making her even more giddy, and only more questions would spill out of her.

"I think he's doing a little very well if he gets to sleep with you, don't you think?" She always had her way with compliments.

The liquid of your drink got stuck in your throat as you covered your mouth, giggling at her sudden comment. "Jesus, Binna," you shook your head as she joined your laughter. "I think he's doing well because this whole Chanyeol situation is finally coming to an end." You reminded the both of you of the hopefully last time you'd ever come face to face with the man of the hour. The day was coming closer, prayers were being said each night, quietly just hoping to make it stop.

Your best friend gave you a nod in understanding. "When are you seeing Jihoon again? Tomorrow, right?" You nodded. "Then we can finally stop talking about this piece of shit. He's been occupying your mind a little too much." Just like most of the time, she was yet again right about that. The following day would be the last consultation you'd have with Wonwoo's lawyer before your court date on Friday - Payday.

"Yeah, well," you sighed in frustration, leaning back in the wooden chair, "Can you blame me?"

"No, no, of course not," she quickly reassured you, patting your hand. "But at least you also got some other things to keep your mind occupied with." Wiggling her eyebrows to underline her question. Even without her antic, you would've known what she was implying.

"You mean Wonwoo?" You chuckled, to which she excitedly nodded, biting down on her lips to hide the grin that was daring to escape. "But even there's Chanyeol involved! Do you know how much we've talked about him?"

"Ugh," Binna faked a gag, "Can we just agree to not say his name out loud anymore? Let's just call him... Grapefruit." That woman and her codenames. Ever since she had started working as a teacher, this became a thing of hers to do with all of the men she shared a bed with. At first, it was only to be able to talk about them in front of the kids, since some of those stories may have included a single father or two of the kids in her class, but she had let it seep into her everyday life. Explaining why you'd now find yourself calling a thirty-something-year-old grown man "bookshelf", just because of the way his haircut looked from the side. Grapefruit would be added to the list.

"Grapefruit?"

"Yeah," she nodded, taking another sip, "I hate Grapefruits. Anyways-," she waved it off to change the subject. "What do you mean you talk about Cha- I mean, Grapefruit?"

"Well- like, about the entire situation. You know, some evenings we spent going through court stuff or looked through what he's been up to." Jihoon had mentioned to 'always know who you're going up against'. And Wonwoo and you took his advice to heart. There were multiple nights spent together in the office, sometimes along with Mingyu, or even at his place, going through the files the court had published to you about Exodus' Entertainment. You had stalked his Social Media presence and analyzed his public outings. The smiles he would fake, the words he would lie with. You knew this man inside out, having spent three years with him did come in handy. Even after all this time, he took up more time inside your brain than you would've liked to.

While continuing your story, you motioned around with your hands on the table. "It even all started with him. Sometimes... I mean, I don't always bring it up with Wonwoo, sometimes it's just in my mind. To myself. But... yeah..." Pressing your pointer to a random spot on the wood.

"Hold up-," Binna raised her hand to stop you, "He started it all? What is 'it'? You and Wonwoo?"

You already knew you'd regret your answer before it had even left your lips, but who else could you be the most honest with, if not your best friend since primary school. "Kinda..." 

"Alright, you're stupid." She simply stated, staring blankly right at you.

"No, wait-" You scolded her, but she just shrugged. 

"What? You're an idiot. Why would you think that? How could that asshole have anything to do with what's going on with you two now?" 

You sighed, shaking your head slightly, knowing you'd have to choose your words wisely "No, no, look. I mean," you sighed with an annoyed undertone, trying to get your eyes off her. "I know he doesn't have any effect on me anymore whatsoever, but you can't deny that because of what happened, Wonwoo and I got closer. The break-in started a whole chain reaction-"

"That's idiotic to think about-" Before she could finish, you cut her off.

"No, it's not. It's what made us talk more to each other. Why we started to actually interact and realise that we would have to work with each other and not against each other like we did before." The two of you knew, your words held some truth.

Binna violently shook her head, her bob moving along, "Maybe for you, but most definitely not for him."

You scrunched your eyebrows at the slightly slurred words from your best friend. "What do you mean?"

"He invited you to that event thing before all that shit went down. For God's sake, Y/N!" She shouted into the room, immediately making you jump up to cover her mouth from across the table. You sent her a wide-eyed glare, hoping to make her understand to shut her mouth. Binna nodded as she grasped your hand to pull it down, continuing her exclaim in a quieter volume. "He bought you a fucking dress! And not a cheap one!"

"I know that! But keep it quiet," you snapped at her, sitting back down to continue nursing your drink which was now close to getting empty. God, you should've just ordered two at once, just like Binna did.

"You're not listening to what I'm saying-"

"You're not listening to what I'm saying. I don't think that nothing would've ever happened, but it did speed things up A LOT."

"I thought we went over this. Stop overthinking all of this. Be happy for yourself for once in your goddamn life! You've been fucked over by so many men in your life that don't even deserve to know about your existence. Your father included by the way," she pointed out, making you nod. "And now you found a man that would burn down the entire world for you, and you're still thinking about that shit-eating sorry excuse of a man from your past that doesn't even know how to do his own laundry?" The reminder made you almost chuckle, but the truth was too painful.

To think back on the fact that you once had your hands down his laundry basked and washing machine, because he didn't know how to make use of it, sent a shiver down your spine. "He did actually not know how to do that."

"That's what I'm saying," she sighed out desperately, throwing her head back with a groan. "All of them were such a waste of your time and patience and kindness. So... just enjoy what you have with Wonwoo now. So what if Grapefruit sped up things for you two? If anything, that's a good thing."

"I... I know what you mean. And... I... UGH-" You groaned under your breath, covering your face with your hands before running your fingers through your hair, an exhausted huff of air leaving your lips. If you could, you would've already punched yourself. Just like Binna did after you had told her what happened in Wonwoo's apartment after your quick trip to the Monbebe - she left a bruise that didn't go away for four days and Wonwoo had quite a few questions about that.

"He's not the reason for anything but misery in your life, alright?" The casual use of the nickname made you chuckle. "Wonwoo would still be knees deep for you, he'd still be this big fucking simp, and you'd also still have a crush on him that you, even now, don't want to admit to."

You interfered after hearing her comment as she slyly continued eating some of the fries in the middle of the table. "Hey! That's not true." You huffed out, mumbling the last part of the sentence.

"Oh, it's not? Have you ever said, you know what, 'I like him'? Or 'I have a crush on him'? " Binna nagged, knowing eventually she'd get something out of you.

You decided to stay silent, desperately hoping she'd just drop the subject but both of you knew better than that. 

"Exactly." She pressed her lips and eyes tightly together, her fingers digging into her temples. "You don't know if you have a crush on the man you've been spending the past three weeks with? Non-stop." Binna opened her eyes again to meet yours. "You don't know if you have a crush on the man that has been sending you flowers and food every single day at work? You wanna tell me you don't have a crush on the only man that has been actually able to make you come for the first time in-" Her continuous ranting made you groan out loud.

"OKAY! I like him, alright?! Fine! You win! I like him." With a last deep breath, you stunned her. "There. I said it. I like him, Binna. I really do. I'm scared, yes, fuck it, I'm terrified even, but whatever is going on right now feels really good and I really don't want to fuck it up."

You had decided to let yourself give into him, slowly but surely. The final decision must've happened way earlier in your brain. After yet another hot and passionate session of yours, late at night, cuddling into his side as he subconsciously was still grazing his fingers over your skin while slowly giving into the sleepiness that had overcome him. 

You couldn't help it. The more you tried to fight it, the more Wonwoo was willing to fight. A fresh set of flowers on your desk every single week, pastries from the bakery Binna and you had recently found and started to love every morning by the front desk at the office, heck even the car keys you hadn't been able to get rid of yet. By now it had basically turned into a game of you trying to leave them in his apartment or office, only for you to find them inside your bag later that day again. It made you chuckle each time. He was a stubborn one, that Jeon Wonwoo. Whenever your own thoughts were starting to catch up with you, trying to remind you that he was indeed too good to be true, and every man would eventually turn out to be the same, the CEO made sure to be right there, keeping your mind clean and ensuring you of his not-always-so-inocennt, yet pure intentions with you. The few sleepless nights the two of you had been spending together were proof of just that.

With wide eyes and a smug smile on her lips, Binna leaned back, crossing her arms in front of her chest. "Well done. I'm proud of you."

Sulkingly, knowing she had finally gotten what she wanted, you crossed your arms. "Leave me alone."

The woman in front of you continued to gaze at you, her lips sealed as she took in your sunken-in frame. A sad smile was starting to form on her face. "You don't have to pretend to be all cold and cool about this. He's pretty cute. With all the stuff he does."

You wish you could've stopped the blush spreading on your cheeks, but it shined so proudly, lighting up your entire face as you bit down on your bottom lip.

"I know," you mumbled, taking a fry to fill your mouth with, trying to distract yourself from the situation and hoping your body would stop naturally reacting like that.

A second of silence passed between the two of you before Binna's chuckle interrupted it. She let her forearms rest on top of the table, leaning in to catch your gaze.

"I haven't seen you blush like that in years," she commented softly, reaching to pet the back of your hand. "You deserve this, Y/N. Enjoy it."

Slowly, you raised your head, still almost too shy to lock eyes with her directly. Your gaze quickly fell to your hands touching before chuckling, finding your own thoughts ridiculous, but as embarrassing as it may have seemed to you, you couldn't and didn't want to hold back.

"I really do like him."

Your best friend nodded, "I know," a proud smile decorating her face. Happiness had never looked and felt so good.

-

The plain white walls were starting to dawn on you. A waiting room so sterile, with two paintings being the only splash of colour in the entire corridor, would do that. Even after all the times you had spent sitting there, you were still not used to it and weren't planning on it any time soon. The hope of not having to return all that much ever again had not yet vanished.

A heavy sigh tumbled from your lips as you sulked even deeper into the grey-cushioned seats Jihoon had chosen for his law firm. The past twenty minutes had started to feel closer to an hour with the hollowness of the room. The only sound echoing through your ear was the rushed typing of his assistant around the corner, who hadn't stopped ever since you had arrived. Not even your phone could entertain you enough anymore, time was just moving too slowly.

Wonwoo, with whom you came, had just gotten off the phone with God-knows-who when he directed his attention to you. Amusement made his lips curl up as he put his phone into the inside pouch of his suit jacket before hiding his hands in his pockets.

"He likes to take his time." 

Your exclaim of a breath told him everything he needed to know. He took a quick peek at the still-closed door to the lawyer's office. A door you had been staring at for at least ten minutes.

You took a deep breath in desperation. "Yeah, a little too much time." Your comment made Mingyu, who was sitting opposite of you chuckle. You had to hold back any snarky remark, remembering that he was your last bit of hope and you were supposed to give him all the time he could possibly need. He was a busy man after all and you were most definitely not his only clients. 

Wonwoo's laugh rang through your ear as he got closer to your seated position. "Well, look who's suddenly the impatient one." His comment made you roll your eyes but made the slight smile playing on your lips almost impossible to hide. The past few weeks with him must've done something with you. 

Ever since that late-night event after your not-so-pleasant visit to the Monbebe, the dynamic between the two of you had changed. Drastically. It was less about built-up anger and frustration, not even about hidden tension anymore. Much rather was it now about appreciation, care, and gentleness and... even enjoyment. In all this mess, the two of you had found a way to enjoy each other's presence and forget about the daunting events that were still haunting you.

You two had spent more nights together since then. More than your old self would probably like to admit. But your new self?... She enjoyed it. Not only did those nights end in sex. No, some were just filled with late-night talking - some work-related, others not. He had started asking questions. Quite a few even. About you, and your childhood. Wonwoo had wanted to know what your favourite season was, what your favourite memory of your school time was, and which celebrity you'd bring back from the dead if you could - questions no other ex had ever even entertained to wonder about. Some questions you hadn't even ever asked yourself. And you answered him. You gave him an answer to every single one of his questions. In return, you had found out about his childhood best friends, about him being his grandmother's favourite grandchild, and about what he'd do if he could go back in time. You got to get to know Wonwoo. Not hot-playboy-CEO-bachelor Jeon Wonwoo, but the Jeon Wonwoo, who graduated top of his year at Seoultech University. Wonwoo, whose discovery of stage fright in middle school shattered his dreams of becoming an actor even before his father could drag him into the family business. Wonwoo, who would kill and die for his friends and family and who might look and act like the coldest asshole to walk the streets of the city, but could be deeply caring about the ones most important to him at the same time. You had almost forgotten about the person you had always thought he had been as you got to meet the real side of him. 

The side that called his mum at least once a week whenever she wasn't in town to keep up with the latest gossip she had to tell him. He'd roll his eyes while on the phone with her, sending you looks of apology while you continued to sip on the wine he had poured for you, chuckling at the sight in front of you as he walked around the apartment, nodding along to whatever his mother was ranting about. The side that would never forget your dinner reservations at 8, already thinking about what you'd be wearing and what flowers to get you to match your outfit while listening to yet another uneducated business partner and throwing him out of the room as soon as one wrong comment would fall from their lips. He cursed their existence and the entirety of the corporate world while promising to make his own office and company a place where employees would enjoy coming to work.

He'd sit in his office, checking his wrist every few minutes, counting down the time and catching glimpses at you talking to the other employees, desperately waiting for the work day to end, so he could be at home, doing the dishes he had left in the sink in the morning, still needing to change the bedsheets before you'd arrive with the food you had promised to pick up on the way. How domestic of you two.

There were no obligations, no rules you had to follow. You were just enjoying yourself. Enjoying your time with him. The words he had trusted you with had branded themselves onto your heart and brain, reminding you every single day of what you were getting yourself into. You started to trust him. You were starting to fall. It was crazy. You couldn't help yourself, you couldn't hold back. You didn't want to. Falling was something so inevitably impossible to stop from happening. Whether you're falling over, falling down, or... falling in love.

You had caught yourself looking at him already. Multiple times in the last few weeks. Commenting to yourself, he's facial structure, the tilted line of his jaw, and the bridge of his nose were just aesthetically pleasing. No one would deny, that you were correct in your assumption. But that was not the reason you couldn't help yourself from looking at him. You had ignored the tingle in your stomach and the warmth spreading in your chest. But there was only so much time that you could tell yourself it was nothing until it did become something. And the end of that time arrived sooner than you could've prepared yourself for and hit you like a wall.

You had repeatedly thought about those nights you had spent with him, sitting by the dining table, snacking on the takeout you had decided on for that evening while reading out loud letters from the courthouse, the judge, Jihoon, Jeonghan, and even Chanyeol. Statements from Sehun were rarely ever in the mail you received, he opted for texting you privately, promising to stand with you and support the decisions you would make. But those evenings had led to the current scene unfolding. Another appointment in the Lee Jihoon law firm. The, hopefully, last official time you'd meet here for the haunting reason of Park Chanyeol.

Wonwoo grunted as he threw himself onto the empty seat next to you, "I swear to God, once we're in there, I'm gonna-"

"You're not gonna do anything," you interrupted him, looking to your left to find his side profile as he was still glaring at the closed door. His patience was running thin, you could tell. With a smirk and a scoff, he leaned back and turned to the side, his eyes meeting yours.

"You don't believe me?" He teasingly wondered.

"Oh no, I do believe you," you assured him with a similar smile, "But I also know that you know better than to anger your only friend that can get us out of this."

"Can you maybe not flirt right in front of me?" The younger CEO cringed as he looked towards the door, trying to divert his eyes from the two of you.

Before Wonwoo was able to talk back, a snarky remark already playing on the tip of his tongue, the white door suddenly opened, revealing the slightly messy head of wavy hair.

"Am I interrupting something?" Jihoon joked as he looked into the hallway, his eyes immediately finding you two and your faces that had subconsciously moved in closer to each other.

With a quick move, Wonwoo pushed himself up from the cushion, his hand already awaiting yours to help you up as well. "Yeah, I was just talking about breaking in your door." You ignored his helping hand, opting to stand up yourself, only to feel his gentle grip on your elbows. Was he really helping you? No. Did you still enjoy the soft touch? Yes.

"Hilarious as always." Jihoon nodded, walking back inside, leaving you to let yourself in.

Before walking ahead, you snatched the two thin folders you had brought yourself into your hands and let yourself get led by Wonwoo's hand on your lower back. Something else, you had learned about him was his love for physical touch. Secret little touches had become a standard when standing or sitting next to him. Wonwoo was by no means a man attracted to any form of PDA, he enjoyed it very much privately though. But no one could deny his love for keeping his hand or even just a finger on you. He took pride in doing this as secretly as possible, making no one else notice it. Mentioning physical touch being his love language only got you a roll of his eyes, you recall, and a comment about Yeri, his cousin, nagging him about doing tests like them on the internet, as well as an MBTI test, so he'd 'have it much easier to find a suitable partner'. Later that day, he did admit those tests revealed that his love languages were, in fact, physical touch, as well as, words of affirmation and gift-giving. And his MBTI was, to his last knowledge, INFJ.

Mingyu closed the door as he was the last one to enter, and all four of you in your designated seats in Jihoon's office - him behind his big desk, you right opposite of him, with Wonwoo to your left and Mingyu on your right. The room matched the entire floor perfectly. Pearl-white walls locked you in, and every door matched the colour of the walls. Each piece of furniture was fitted to the cool tones he had decided on. The floor continued to be dark grey, reminding you of a modern doctor's office. Everyone had their own taste, but you were thankful your office looked much different.

You handed him the last piece of content he'd need for the final trial tomorrow. During the past weeks, Jihoon and Jeonghan had consultations with the judge privately, as well as publicly. None of you were supposed to be there as it was only between the lawyers, and he was yet to update you on the progress he had made.

"Okay," the lawyer looked through the printed-out document you had brought along. "This is everything Sehun has texted you? Every single thing. Every word, every picture he sent, every single emoji? Everything."

You nodded along with his questions.

"Everything. I promise. I didn't change anything. I just, copy and pasted it," you swore to him as you spoke the truth.

Jihoon thanked you. "I'll get this to the judge before the trial tomorrow. She won't read it out loud while we're in the courtroom unless it's one hundred per cent necessary so that nothing will happen to Sehun."

"Thanks," you smiled at him. You had kindly asked him to do just that. With everything going on, and Chanyeol already hating enough people, his anger being on a 10/10 most likely, you didn't want to throw Sehun under the bus and call him out for helping you and doing the right thing. What he'll do after this shitshow was done was his issue to deal with and not your place to be involved in.

"So," Wonwoo decided to lead the following conversation. "Where are we right now? How are things looking so far?"

The younger man leaned back in his chair, throwing the pieces of paper back on his desk. He took a deep breath. "Good, I'd say."

"You'd say? That was a yes-or-no kind of question," The CEO stated, his facial expression strict and cold, just like the rest of the world knew him.

"Well, Wonwoo, I can't guarantee you anything. These people are unpredictable. They always have something up their sleeve, like literally constantly, and I'm trying my damn best here-"

"Then do better-"

"Wonwoo-" Mingyu tried to stop the two.

"Wait," you interrupted them before their fight could explode. "What do you mean? What happened last time?" Your eyes were trained on the lawyer as he pushed his chair to turn around, getting a brown file out of his cupboard before turning back, and throwing it to land right in front of you.

Once you got your hands on it and opened the file, you let your eyes rake over each line written in what seemed to be a university document from Seoultech. With your eyebrows scrunched together and your mouth slightly hanging open, you lifted your head to glance at Wonwoo.

"You cheated on your final exams and plagiarised your dissertation?" 

"What?" He quickly got a hold of the piece of paper, reading it for himself, and opened his mouth, ready to raise his voice as he stood up. "That's-"

"Bullshit, I know," Jihoon stopped him calmly. "Don't worry, I called them and got statements from your professors."

Wonwoo looked at his friend in confusion, "But most of them are retired," who just walked over to him to get the file back into his ownership, a smirk proudly presented on his lips.

"I told you, I'm good at my job." Making the CEO scoff and roll his eyes.

You were still in a twilight zone, not able to follow every detail you had read and the conversation happening between the two men.

"But if it was so easy for you to debunk it, why did they write something like that?" Mingyu wondered, gaining back the lawyer's attention.

He sighed before shrugging and settling back into his chair. "I guess they just wanted to try. They claimed Wonwoo to be a master in faking documents, not realising that if I were to find the real ones, they'd be accused of doing the exact same thing. At this point, they have almost nothing else to lose because they're already so close to losing this entire lawsuit."

"Well," Wonwoo jumped in, choosing to continue standing up, "Then what's gonna happen tomorrow? Anything we need to be prepared for?"

Jihoon looked down at his desk as his fingers had started to play with a pen, occupying himself as he talked. 

"Before I brought you guys in, I sent them some final stuff. Some of the statements Sehun got us, and the security camera footage from your office. I think it was Vernon, but he was able to zoom into the face and de-pixel it, which was revealed to be one of Chanyeol's employees who I had mentioned already last week in front of the judge. So, they'll go over that and comment on it tomorrow. They'll probably ask you guys some more questions about the night of the break-in. Like, where you were, what you were doing, how did you find out, and so on. Just be honest about that. Try to stick to the version you guys have told me, that would make my life a lot easier, thank you. They'll also question Park about it, probably also Sehun." He fell quiet for a second before continuing. "Everything else is pretty much done. They reached out to some of the women, but most of them declined to show up in court personally and chose to send in videos and written statements. It would be smart to read them out loud, but I don't know if they will or if they'll protect the identities of those women. My plan would be to win your lawsuit tomorrow and let them handle the sexual assault cases alone without us involved. And I don't know how that will play in for us... I mean- they've seen all of Yoon's tricks, and they're really not impressed by him from what I could tell."

"Good," Wonwoo commented in the middle of it.

"But they also haven't forgotten about your little fight, remember that." He pointed a strict finger at the oldest one in the room.

Another reason, why Jihoon and Jeonghan had been asked to be seen in front of the judge alone was 'for their own safety'. After the last encounter all of you had in court ended in Wonwoo and Chanyeol almost beating each other up, the judge, Miss Kang, had sent out individual emails, asking the lawyers to visit her on their own. The last sitting would be with everyone again though.

"I have the feeling that the jury is definitely on our side, but the judge might ask about the fight and possible anger issues," Jihoon continued to explain.

Wonwoo scoffed as he ran his fingers through his hair. "What do anger issues have to do with any of this?! And if anyone has anger issues, it's that fucking idiot Park, alright?!"

The younger one of the two and you looked at each other in silence, also sharing a quick look with Mingyu, before turning towards the CEO. A tight smile made its way onto your face, but the awkward silence hung heavily in the room. Wonwoo glanced at Jihoon first, before desperately looking at Mingyu and you. With a deep breath, he decided to sit back down.

"I have anger issues only when it comes to him."

-

Getting into Wonwoo's car the day of the last court sitting almost felt like every other time you had done it. The sequence was the same. He'd text you, he was on his way. Once he arrived, he'd ring the number of your apartment and you'd let him in. You'd leave your front door open, so he could come in once he reached your floor while getting your bag ready and possibly doing some finishing touches on your makeup. Days where you had spent the previous night at his place were slightly different. After having breakfast together at his dining table, and brushing your teeth, Wonwoo would get ready in the morning to chauffeur you to your apartment. He'd patiently wait in your living room while you got ready in your bedroom. He had offered to keep some things at his apartment already, yet you declined, assuring yourself of not moving too quickly by still getting ready for the day in your own room. Having a toothbrush and stuff to sleep in at his place was enough for you for the time being.

Your focus was solely on your phone as you texted Mingyu your whereabouts, asking him if he had already made his way over to the courthouse. Nervously, you had also texted Jihoon, keeping him updated with every street you got closer and closer.

The sudden touch of a hand on your knee made you look up. "Stop." Wonwoo had put his hand on you, stopping your leg from violently shaking. "You have no reason to be nervous, we got this."

"That's easier said than done," you scoffed. "They could destroy us. They could've something planned and we wouldn't know."

"Could you check the glove compartment, please?" Wonwoo got your attention, making you raise your head at his sudden question after enjoying the silence in the car.

"Hm?" You hummed.

With a quick glance at you and a nod towards the storage unit in his car, he repeated his question. "The glove compartment. I got a letter from my mum yesterday, and I put it in there. She texted me and said it was for both of us." With a swift one-handed move, you rounded the corner.

"For us?" You wondered confused, reaching forward to open the compartment.

He shrugged. "I don't know."

You got the letter in your hands, immediately noticing the pastel pink envelope, chuckling to yourself. Jeon Chaewon's role as one of the most feminine old-fashioned ladies you had ever met was no joke.

Careful not to destroy the paper too much, you opened the letter, getting the piece of paper out of the envelope when two extra pieces fell into your lap - slightly smaller than the letter itself. You decided to take a look at them first. After turning them around, you gasped. Your hand fell to your mouth before a chuckle erupted from your lungs.

"What?" A quick glance at Wonwoo made Wonwoo's eyebrows shoot up, only to calm down again once he noticed your amusement.

You couldn't help but bite down on your lip as you showed him the plane tickets. "Your mum's sending us to Paris?" Throwing the question into the room as you were still confused, now directing your attention to the letter, reading through the lines she wrote.

"Oh," you exclaimed. "There's a business even in Paris. She wants us to go." Reading the last sentence got another chuckle out of you. "She said, P.S.: If you want to take Mingyu along as well, I can get you another ticket, but think about that carefully."

"Aaah," Wonwoo nodded, stopping at a red light, letting his elbow rest by the window as he glanced to your side. "She told me about this before she left." He reached out to read through the letter himself. "But I didn't know she already booked tickets for us."

"And a hotel," you added.

"A hotel too?" He wondered, looking at you as you leaned over the middle console to point towards the sentence where she had mentioned the hotel you'd be staying in.

Wonwoo sighed, "Jesus..." With his focus still on the handwriting of his mother, he forgot about the illuminating lights ahead of you.

You glanced up as the green light hit your eyes. "It's green," you pointed out, snatching the letter out of his hand, so he'd put his focus back on the road.

Wonwoo noticed you had gone quiet, while your eyes were on the tickets and the letters. "Do you want to go?" He asked.

You looked up at him, putting all the pieces of paper back together into the envelope. "I think now is not really the right time to think about a Paris trip, to be honest."

"But it's a business trip."

"Yeah," you chuckled. "But to Paris." You continued to look at him, waiting for him to meet your eyes. He exchanged glances with you for a short moment, his lips curling up the slightest amount.

"Yes. As a business trip," he repeated, making you chuckle. "So, do you wanna go?" He asked you again, keeping you in his view as you reached another red light for a few seconds.

With a deep breath in, you shrugged your shoulders, keeping the envelope in your grip as your bag was still in the backseat. "Sure, why not. We should do it for your mum if she requested it."

"For my mum?" Wonwoo chuckled, making you nod.

"Yeah," you cleared your throat. "I mean, if she already booked everything, it would be rude not to go. And like you said, it's a business trip for an event, so... that would be good, right?"

He nodded. "Right."

For a second, you stayed silent before speaking up again, noticing how much closer you had gotten to the courthouse.

"Should we ask Mingyu if he'd want to come as well?"

"God no," Wonwoo was quick to answer with a huff. He took a quick look at you, a grin already spreading on his lips. "Somebody's gotta keep the company in check while we're gone, right?"

With a smile, you nodded along with him. "Mm, you're right." Before both of you fell into another round of comfortable silence while the smile never left your lips, biting down to hide it.

You turned your head to glance outside of the window, watching the buildings pass before Wonwoo took the last right turn to enter the parking lot.

-

Exiting the car and walking towards the main entrance of the courthouse, you were suddenly attacked by a group of men and women clinging onto their notebooks.

"Miss Yoon! Do you think, you will win!"

"Mister Jeon, are you confident for the trial today?"

"Is it true that Mister Park was a bad ex-boyfriend?"

"Is this all a publicity stunt to get more attention and build up your company, Mister Jeon?"

"Was the judge bribed by Mister Park and Mister Oh?"

With shock written all over your face, you came to a sudden halt, the grip on your bag strap tightening. Wonwoo, who was right behind you, hot on your heels, was quick to reach around you, pulling you in closer towards his body as soon as he heard the first words being shouted at the two of you. The cold glare of the CEO didn't stop the journalists from coming closer, pestering you with even more questions. The sudden attention overwhelmed you as you stumbled up the stairs towards the main entrance, where Jihoon was already waiting for you, holding the door open, and ushering you to move faster. As soon as your feet crossed the ledge, he closed the doors.

"Get a life!" He shouted at the mass, as they groaned in synch, turning back around and separated into individual groups again.

Still in shock, you turned around, not noticing the hand still on your body, not meaning to let go any time soon. 

"What the hell was that?!" You exclaimed, brushing through your hair the wind had messed up slightly.

Jihoon groaned, walking past you, making the two of you follow him together as he started explaining. "I don't know who called them. Last week only two of them were here, but Jesus..."

"But why are journalists so interested in this? It's not like this is a national scandal-"

"Not national, but within the corporate world, this is quite big. Park's company might be about to break, and everyone wants in on that," Jihoon explained as you were catching your breath again, finding Mingyu's tight smile as he stood by the door of the courtroom, patiently waiting for you.

"Or maybe they're here to watch the Jeon empire collapse." A sudden all-too-familiar voice caught you off guard. Turning around, you were met with the mischievous eyes you've known for oh so long. "How tragic would that be," Jeonghan smirked at you three, his hand deep in his pocket as he casually walked up to you.

"We'll see about that," the lawyer snapped back.

Seeing the cheeky smile that had been haunting you for weeks made your heart race in anger as you bit down on your tongue, knowing every word you'd give off yourself could be turned against you. Without another comment, you turned around and rushed over to Mingyu in quick steps, greeting him with a hug, forgetting about Wonwoo and Jihoon, who decided to join you, leaving your cousin in the middle of the corridor before he disappeared around the corner again.

"Where's he going?" The younger CEO wondered, nudging his head towards the direction Loki had just left in.

Wonwoo shrugged, "Who knows."

"Probably consoling Park and Oh about some last-minute stuff," Jihoon took the word, glancing at you three. "Is everything clear with you guys? Any questions?"

Mingyu and you shook your heads as the oldest answered for all of you.

"No, let's get this shit over with." Speaking from your soul.

-

The four of you were directed towards your designated table on the left side of the room with Jihoon on the far right, closest to the middle of the room, followed by Wonwoo to his left, then you, and Mingyu was seated next to you. The rest of the room was empty, apart from the court reporter who was setting up her station and the security man by each door. As the trial was private, no public interests were allowed in the room. Even with the silence filling it, neither one of you even dared to open your mouth, knowing better than to let anything get to you.

The entrance door opened, the voices of the three people entering immediately bounced off the walls. They may have tried to whisper, but God knows they were terrible at it.

"Good morning," Jeonghan bowed to each security guard with a smile on his face, his followers copying him. As they passed your group, your cousin also sent a grin towards you, Chanyeol opted for a smug nod of his head while Sehun was seen with a genuine tight smile.

Exodus' CEO leaned back in his chair as soon as they all sat down, a loud sigh coming from him, making you close your eyes and take a deep breath in annoyance.

"Aaah," he moaned. "What a beautiful day today is, right guys? How terrible it would be to ruin that for someone." He took a quick look at your table, meeting Wonwoo's glare, but it only made Chanyeol chuckle.

You continued your prayers inside your head to let this pass quickly, followed by praying for his downfall and that he may please rot in a cell and never feel the touch of another human being ever again. He deserved nothing else.

Paranoid, you turned around to make sure your bag was still hanging over the back of your chair. After finding it right where you left it, your train of thought was interrupted.

"The jury will now enter!" A voice echoed through the room, making all of your heads look straight ahead to where the door opened. You could tell, not one of you had thought the trial would start so suddenly. The people who would make up the jury and would eventually be part of the reason for either your victory or downfall today entered the room. None of them even dared to lock eyes with any of you. Everyone kept their heads down until they were seated.

"All rise!" The voice spoke up again, making all of you act responsively as you stood up in synch, the sound of your chairs screeching against the floor slashing through your ear canal.

The door on the very far right side in front of you opened, revealing Miss Kang, the judge that had been assigned to your case. She greeted everyone in the room with a kind smile, making her warm presence light up the room. She was one of the good people within the law enforcement sector of the country, you just knew it. She'd trust you. Right?...

Judge Kang sat down on the big leathered chair, organising the stacks of paper in front of her, before taking a deep breath. 

"This court is now in session, you may be seated," she called out into the room. Each person followed her demand, taking a seat again, nudging their chairs closer towards the table in front of them.

"We've got quite beautiful weather today, so let's not make this complicated, alright? I think we all want to enjoy the few rays of sunshine," she tried to lighten up the aura of the courtroom, clearly noticing the heavy tension daunting on all of you. Quiet chuckles could be heard, following her comment, smiling faces gazing up at her.

She looked down at her papers. "Alright, we call the case 7.4.2-8 in which Oskan & Co. has been charged with theft and stolen copyright by Exodus Entertainment. Is the plaintiff ready?" She directed her eyes to the right table.

"Yes, Your Honour," Jeonghan answered her politely. The pitch of his voice could send a shiver down your spine almost in an instant. Laced with pretentiousness. You had to remind yourself not to react. Not even the smallest muscle on your face was supposed to move.

Unfaced, she then turned towards you. "Is the defence ready?"

Jihoon nodded confidently, "Yes, your honour."

"Good," she smiled again. "We'll first hear the opening statement from the defence, just to freshen up everyone's memory since it's been a while since we have all gathered here, right? Defendant lawyer, Lee Jihoon, please lay out the facts."

-

Breaks were forgotten. The trial was in full motion. One after the other was asked to come forward, sit down and get questioned by their own lawyer, followed by getting torn to shreds by the lawyer of the opposite party. Judge Kang had let Jihoon decide whether he'd want to start questioning one of you first somebody from the plaintiff - he chose to bring out Mingyu. 'Let's start with a defence, not attack', you remembered him saying.

Jeonghan followed by questioning Wonwoo. Picking people apart psychologically was one of his strongest character traits, he was raised by one of Korea's greatest manipulators after all. But his new approach confused you. Unlike the way you had seen him before, he was soft-spoken with the CEO. Nudging his answers out one by one while keeping a low tone. He must've known just how much Wonwoo would usually react to somebody talking to him like he was as stupid as they could come, but he kept it cool. It surprised all of you. He continued nodding politely, excusing himself every now and then, keeping his sharp tongue in the back of his throat, and never declining Jeonghan's accusations directly. Just like you had practised. The words 'No, this didn't happen' never once fell. Wordings like 'Not exactly', 'As far as I know', and 'To my understanding', were the only ones to ever hit your ear. If all calculated correctly, it must've left a good impression on the judge and jury.

Jihoon opted to get Chanyeol out of his seat next. What Jeonghan could do, he could only do better. He had the receipts.

He started out civil and collected. Asking questions about his whereabouts the night of the break-in, followed by general questions about the company, as they were slowly diverted to subject his private life. His hobbies, and how he would spend his weekdays and weekends if work was out of the question. Jeonghan tried his best to object to each question that wasn't concerning the case directly, but you better bet Jihoon had the perfect explanation for each of his statements ready to roll off his tongue. Every time your cousin shot out of his chair, his voice echoing through the room loud and clear, he was asked to sit down just as quickly.

Chanyeol was asked to stay seated as Jeonghan switched places with the other lawyer in the room, opening his mouth to defend his client as best as he could. If only it wasn't for Jihoon doing a much better job in the first place.

You let your eyes glide across the room. Focused on Miss Kang, you watched her take note after note, marking her own thoughts and questions down as the trial proceeded. Further on the right, the jury seemed invested. Some nodded along with each word coming from Jeonghan, while others scrunched up their faces as soon as Chanyeol would even just take a breath before coming up with an answer. It almost made you chuckle. You couldn't see Sehun unless you'd lean back, but you decided against it. It might direct unwanted attention to your action. You were about to glance at the security guard on the left side of the room when the sound of your name hit your ear.

Your head shot towards Jeonghan.

"To my understanding, you were in a committed relationship with one of the defendants." His steps came to a halt right in front of Exodus' CEO. Before he could even open his mouth, Jihoon hastily pushed his chair back.

"Objection, your honour! Privilege! To my understanding, we had decided to leave private relationships out of this trial if not directly connected." Each one of you knew that there was only a hint of truth in his statement since you were all convinced most of this trial was indeed directly connected to the bon you had once shared with the other man.

Judge Kang nodded. "You are correct about that, Mister Lee." She turned her attention to her left, but Jeonghan took the first word.

"Your honour, but doesn't the defendant being a past lover of my client not seem like a direct connection to the case? The fact that Mister Park's work has been stolen by the company partially led by a grieving past significant other must look like less of a coincidence and more like an act of revenge." How dare he use the words 'significant other'.

Miss Kang couldn't help but sigh as she took a quick look at Jihoon, an apologetic expression daunting on her face before she nodded. "Yes, Mister Yoon. You may continue. But try to keep emotional descriptions out of your statements, please," she advised him.

Jihoon lowered his head, taking a deep breath, "Shit." His mumble suddenly got your heart to skip up. You could feel it starting to pump much harder than before. In no possible way was his reaction a good sign. Wonwoo immediately noticed the change in atmosphere, turning towards you, to catch your side profile as you had closed your eyes and held your head down, trying to block out any of the words coming from Jeonghan or Chanyeol.

"The relationship was mostly very peaceful. I mean, just like every other couple, we had our quarrels and misunderstandings, but not much more than that." With a fake sigh, he looked at the jury, trying to paint his eyes with as much pain as possible before he continued. "Towards the end... it did get bad though... you know, I was always told that jealousy was healthy, at least a little bit, but it became quite extreme."

"From Miss Yoon?" Jeonghan nudged him.

"Yes," Chanyeol nodded. "I think me deciding to end things possibly left her in quite a hole-"

Jihoon shot up again. "Objection! Hearsay, your honour."

The judge nodded, "Sustained. Mister Park, please don't interpret any of the defendant's emotions. Just answer Mister Yoon's questions directly." Her reaction made the CEOs smile. She nodded at Jihoon as he sat back down with a quick bow.

Jeonghan took a deep breath. "I would just like to ask the jury to take Mister Park's side of this story into consideration."

"I'm sure they will, Mister Yoon." Miss Kang sent him a tight smile before leaning back in her chair.

Jeonghan dismissed himself as Exodus' CEO was asked to sit down by the table again.

It was now or never.

Only a year ago, you would tell yourself it wasn't worth it to fight back. That Chanyeol was much more powerful than you. Whatever you'd say would be just pushed under the rug. No one would care what you'd have to say. But not now. You had three people right next to you, ready to support whatever you would be stating out there. You had a judge who would patiently listen to you. There was an entire jury that was possibly still undecided. But most importantly, you had yourself and the truth. You had the facts. You knew what was right and what was wrong. Why should the bad guys win just because you didn't even dare to stand up? Too many times, people have let moments like these just pass. Not again. Not now. They couldn't win. You wouldn't let them win. This was for all the women he had hurt. Each woman that decided against facing him in court, but was strong enough to give their statements. You couldn't let them down. They helped you to get so far, now it was your turn.

"Well then," Miss Kang's voice glided through the room. "If there's nothing else to say anymore, I-"

"Excuse me, you honour." Suddenly you could feel each pair of eyes on your form. Each member of the jury had their face turned towards you. Judge Kang's eyebrows raised at the surprised interruption. Sehun, Chanyeol, and Jeonghan unexpectedly looked up, shock written all across their face. Mingyu and Jihoon had lifted their heads to look at you while Wonwoo's hand subconsciously had reached out right, ready to pull you back, unsure of what you were getting yourself into and surprised by your sudden exclaim.

"Yes, Miss Yoon?"

You swallowed the forming gulp in your throat. "I... I still would like to say something. Mister Lee still has to question me."

She nodded. "Of course, would you like to come out?" With her palm, she motioned to the witness stand seat to her left, to which you agreed, pushing your chair back gently before getting the bag off the back. Opening it, the folder you were looking for was already smiling at you. You got it out, opened it to get what you needed and made your way forward. As you passed Jihoon, who had stood up, you came to a halt.

"Ask me everything," you met his eyes. "Every little thing you need to know to win this, okay?"

Your eyes may have fooled you, but you could almost see fear forming in the man's eyes as he took the paper you had given him, nodding at you as he still tried to comprehend what you were asking of him. With big steps and a proud stance, you held your shoulders straight and made your way over to the witness stand seat.

You took a deep breath as soon as you sat down to calm your nerves that, you were sure, would not vanish any time soon.

"Miss Yoon," Jihoon's voice made you straighten your back as you looked up. All eyes were on you. Your heart was threatening to pump out of your chest at this point. You ignored all the other people in the room. You tried to. Keeping your eyes on the lawyer, that's what he had told you. "How would you describe your relationship with Mister Park?"

"Objection!" Jeonghan shot up from his chair. "Asked and answered."

"Not from Miss Yoon," Jihoon turned towards their table as the Judge agreed with him.

"Overruled. The defendants have yet to speak about this matter. You were given the opportunity, now it's their turn." Explaining the definition of fairness. "Mister Lee, please continue."

"Thank you, Your Honour." Jihoon sent in an encouraging smile. "So Miss Yoon, how would you describe your relationship with Mister Park?"

"Pretty normal in the beginning. Quiet. Private."

"In the beginning?"

You clutched the edge piece of one of the papers in front of you. "Yes."

"Could you please go into detail why only in the beginning?"

"Objection!" Jeonghan called out once again. "Leading question-"

"Overruled," Miss Kang interrupted him before he could even continue. "The defendant specifically mentioned 'in the beginning', so Mister Lee has the right to question her further. Please continue, Miss Yoon." Making the other lawyer sit back down with a sigh and you nod.

"Well... ehm...," you were well aware of your pauses possibly only bringing negative attention onto you, yet you couldn't help it as you tried to form the right sentences in your head. "It seemed like a perfectly normal relationship at first, but... I noticed that his behaviour started changing."

"Changing? In what way?"

"Objection! Compound question."

Judge Kang sighed into the microphone. "Overruled. Mister Lee repeated one word, then followed up with his actual question. Please continue."

You took a deep breath, waiting for Jihoon's assuring nod to answer.

"At first, it started out as jealousy. Or so I thought... later on, about a few months into the relationship... it turned into... something more controlling."

"Could you elaborate on that?" He wondered kindly.

"Yes...," you answered, glancing down at the pieces of evidence you were holding in your hands. Copies of which Jihoon had in his own grip. "At first, he asked me to not leave the house without him- I'm sorry, I meant the apartment we shared." Jihoon nodded along. "Whenever I wouldn't obey to that or... other times when I'd get home later than expected from work... he...," you took a pause. Gulped. Took a shaky breath. Not here. "He would get... really angry."

"How would he show his anger?" He was asking you each question softly, carefully. Understanding the sensitivity as soon as his eyes had landed on the file.

Almost bored, Jeonghan raised his hand, "Objection! Relevance."

Jihoon turned towards the judge. "I think, if we hear my client out, we'd see how relevant her answer is in comparison to Mister Park's comments about their past relationship."

Judge Kang nodded. "I agree. Overruled. Miss Yoon, please continue."

Another unstable breath left your lips. "It was- I mean, differently. At first... it was screaming. Then..." You hadn't even bothered putting on nail polish, so you only had your nails left to pick at. "Then... he'd start to... get physical... sometimes... yeah," you whispered at the end.

"Was there any time you felt truly threatened by Mister Park?"

"Yeah...," you admitted. If some jury members had lost interest in the case, at least by now, everyone's attention was back on track. You could hear a hairpin drop. Each breath you took shook the entire room. "There were... occurrences... when I had to go to the hospital. Because... ehm... he..." careful with your words. "He touched me... without my consent."

Biting down on his lip, Jihoon was careful with each word. "Do you have any evidence of this?"

You decided to only nod, as the security kept a close eye on you, noticing you lifting the papers you were clutching onto with your entire being. He went up to you to take them out of your possession, handing them over to the judge as she asked you to continue while going over the doctor's letter. It was the one piece of hospital evidence you had kept from that time. Everything else seemed irrelevant to you as most of the bruises you had showed up with to the hospital could be explained by hitting your knee or arm against furniture. But not this. But there was a second page to it.

"Miss Yoon," Jihoon started again. "You were admitted to the hospital once before, is that correct? Due to a car crash, if I'm not mistaken."

"Yes," you spoke out loud.

"Who was driving the car at that time?"

"Mister Park," you answered honestly, knowing that he was reading every piece of evidence off the paper you had handed to him.

Jihoon nodded, now turning to the woman sitting on the highest chair in the room. "Your honour, if you turn to page two of the piece of evidence you were just handed, you can see the doctor's findings, as well as the police report on page three, after the car crash, involving Park Chanyeol and Yoon Y/N. The police stated it was a crash caused by a drunk driver, that being Mister Park. In which he sustained a mild head injury, while Miss Yoon had to be transported to the hospital due to a broken rib and a bruised leg." After a quick look behind him, he turned back to the judge. "If I'm seeing correctly, this document was signed within the walls of this very courthouse. And yet... it has been deleted completely from Mister Park's file."

You decided to stay quiet. You had done your job. You couldn't even look up, knowing disappointed eyes were probably just waiting for you. You had lied to him. Lied to Wonwoo about the scar on your rib. You had mentioned it was due to an injury from falling at the playground as a kid. He brushed it off to be never spoken about it again. And now this.

"So, the all so happy relationship, Mister Park swore to have had with the defendant... doesn't seem to have been all that peaceful after all. That was all, thank you." He bowed before walking back from his spot, joining Wonwoo and Mingyu by the table again.

The all-along so quiet room suddenly shifted as the jury turned to each other to speak at a normal volume, ignoring the room they were still sitting in. Even Jeonghan, who had held back with his objection towards the end, was quick to turn to Chanyeol, who was already raising his voice, standing up to defend himself.

Before it could all escalate too much, Judge Kang got a hold of her hammer, pounding it against the wood to calm the room. "Quiet!" Each person reacted instantly, getting back into their seats, with their eyes on her.

"We will take a ten-minute break. In the meantime, I will go over these documents. The jury is advised to console each other, but not yet come to a conclusion. We will go over everything after the short break, okay? You're dismissed." With one final hit of the hammer, almost everyone stood up. The jury left the room immediately. Chanyeol had pushed himself off the chair aggressively, rushing out as Jeonghan was hot on his heel. Miss Kang passed you quietly while you stood back up, trying to find your breath to face your group of people again.

Before you had even reached them, Jihoon was already in front of you. "What was that? Are you okay?" But you only nodded. "Are you sure?" He asked again. This time, you smiled.

"Yeah..." a faint whisper left your lips as you could suddenly feel your chest lifting again. The tears that had formed vanished all of a sudden, leaving you with a lighter chest and satisfaction rushing through your body.

"Wh-" Mingyu tried to jump into the conversation, but the lawyer stopped him.

"We should maybe continue this outside."

You all nodded along with him, getting ready to leave the room for the break when a voice behind you made you turn around.

"Y/N." Sehun called out for you. He leaned against the desk slightly awkwardly, not knowing what to do with his hands as he took a deep breath. "I'm sorry." If only he knew how much he had helped you. With two big steps, you stopped right in front of him, not even giving him a second to react as you threw your arms around him, pulling him in. He seemed to be taken aback, but you quickly felt his hand patting your back, making you lean back, leaving him to breathe freely again.

"Thank you," you smiled at him before turning back to the three other men who were patiently waiting for you.

-

The three of you had been standing and sitting around in the hallway of the courthouse for the past three minutes and Wonwoo was yet to say something. Jihoon had exclaimed his concerns for you, Mingyu had asked you around ten times if you were truly okay and after assuring him that you had truly never felt better, he had decided to sit down next to you. The CEO was still standing by the wall, looking straight ahead while not really focusing on anything in particular.

As the lawyer and the second CEO had fallen into a conversation, you chose to leave them alone and join Wonwoo. Standing up, you patted down invisible creases on your blouse, getting closer and closer to him with each step you took. Instead of joining him by standing at his side, you stopped right in front of him.

Looking up, he didn't even dare to meet your eyes. He just continued to stare straight ahead. There was an unreadable expression on his face, making you want to step around him as carefully as possible to not disturb whatever was going on in his head. As cold as the entire building of the old courthouse was, the only chill rushing down your spine was due to his glance.

As soon as you tried to open your mouth, he beat you to it. 

"Why didn't you tell me?" At the same time, he lowered his gaze towards you, meeting your pleading eyes, begging him to talk to you. "About what he did."

With a sigh, you let your head hang as you looked to the ground. With a deep breath, you got the courage to speak to him as you interlocked your glances. "I told you, I wanted to forget everything involving him."

"Yeah, but you can't just forget something like that."

"Well, I tried, okay?!" You suddenly found yourself with a raised voice, surprising both of you, as well as Mingyu and Jihoon, who took a quick look at the two of you but continued their conversation once Wonwoo's cold eyes met theirs. "You really think I want to dwell on such a horrible memory of a man? He was a person I once trusted, and he used that trust and misused me! Of course, I'd want to forget that!" You hissed a breath in and out, lowering your voice again. "But what kind of person would I be if I had just let him portray himself as a victim while fifteen other women made a statement about him sexually harassing them... huh? I was able to live with what happened to me, but he... he hurt SO MANY other women... I- I couldn't just let that pass. If none of them wants to face him, fine. But I have the chance, and don't take it?..." With a sigh, you ended your rant. "I couldn't live with myself after that."

He let the silence linger between you for a short moment as he straightened his back, looking at you again. "How long have you planned on doing this? Why didn't you involve me? Or Jihoon at least? Or for whatever reason maybe even Mingyu?"

"Up until that idiot opened his mouth to talk about me, I wasn't even sure that I was going to do it. But... I had to. And I had to do it alone. Do you know how good that feels now?" A chuckle of relief tumbled from your lips as you couldn't hold back your smile. "They have every piece of evidence they need to... fine him, take away his company, put him behind bars or God knows what."

"Come here," he whispered as he took a step forward and opened his arms. You didn't move though. You continued to stand still, your arms crossed in front of your chest as you glanced up at him.

"I don't want a hug." Your comment told him that you would still be mad at him for not understanding your reasoning. But that didn't stop him. With another step, he had invaded your room, engulfing you in the warmth of his arms you had come to find comfort in during so many nights. Once he noticed you weren't moving, he leaned down just a slight bit closer to your ear.

"I'm proud of you," he spoke quietly, making sure only you would be able to hear those words he had chosen for just you. "But I was worried."

With a sigh, you gave in, wrapping your arms around his slim, yet muscle-packed, torso, getting a relieved sigh from him in return.

Before any of you were able to truly enjoy the short moment of intimacy, Mingyu's loud voice rang through your ears.

"Group hug!" With heavy steps, he rushed over to you two, throwing his big arms over your shoulders, underestimating his weight, making you grunt out loud. You could feel Wonwoo's annoyance radiating off him, to which you couldn't help but chuckle, which was quickly joined by Jihoon doing the exact same.

"You don't even know if we won and yet you're celebrating." He approached you with his hands hiding in his pockets, watching you with bright eyes and a wide grin.

"Who cares if we won," Mingyu commented, almost getting interrupted by his best friend, who opened his mouth but was stopped by the slightly bigger man. "Y/N got to say what she needed to say. Park will get what he deserves. Whether that involves our case or not, I really don't care at this point, to be honest."

With a deep sigh, the older man nodded. "That's very cute and I understand that, and Y/N, you know that I support you, but I still have a job here to finish and if we don't win this case... you can fire me."

"We won't fire you," Wonwoo, now behind you, with his palm once again placed comfortably on your lower back.

"No, no," Jihoon glanced at him. "I am begging you to fire me if we don't win this, do you understand me?" Getting a roll of his eyes from the older CEO, while Mingyu just chuckled, patting the smaller man's shoulder assuringly.

Your exchange of words was interrupted by one of the security men that had been standing inside throughout the entire sitting, who was suddenly standing in the hallway.

"Judge Kang is asking you to come back inside, we'll continue." The four of you nodded in synch, each taking one last deep breath in. One last time. Hopefully.

But before any of you could even take one step forward, a shrill voice called out.

"Hold on! Just a minute!" Jeonghan rushed towards you from around the corner, your eyes quickly finding his. "Y/N, a word, please." Motioning at you to follow him.

Your eyebrows shot up at the sudden demand. In what world did he imagine you'd go out of your way to suddenly follow his lead.

"Whatever you have to say to her, you can say here as well." Wonwoo's deep voice vibrated through your entire body. You noticed the microscopic step he took closer as you felt his chest brush against your arm.

Jeonghan shook his head, clearly irritated by the men surrounding you. "Could I please talk to my cousin in private?" Looking straight at the man behind you, expecting another snark from him, when you spoke up.

"No." You crossed your arms in front of your chest in defence. Your body knew which stance to take in right away.

He had betrayed you. You hadn't heard from him in years before you met him in the courtroom again. And out of all the people there were in the world, he chose to support the man you had sworn off your life. The man with the name you had tried to scratch out of every piece of skin on your body that he had touched. A betrayer, a traitor, and a manipulator. That's who Jeonghan was. Quite fitting to Chanyeol. Two fucked-up halves that would make a deadly whole.

"I'm sorry."

...

...

With quiet stares, each one of you looked straight ahead. No one was fully sure of what words had just hit their ear. The movement of his mouth could've possibly been an illusion. That seemed more likely than an actual apology coming from his lips.

"What?" You were the one to break the silence. Instinctively, Wonwoo's hand travelled to the left, his fingers gently curling around your waist.

The step Jeonghan took forward was welcomed as none of you decided to move backwards, letting him know he could continue.

He sighed. "I... I didn't know... about... you know... that." With a stressed breath in, he continued. "When I took on this case, he told me the exact same thing he had told you and the judge. With our history, it didn't take much convincing for me. I knew you and him were... yeah- anyways- but... I swear, I had no idea."

Still unphased by his apology, he resumed his ramble.

"I know you don't think much of me, but not even I would go this low to support someone like that.. and I know that... that- this apology or whatever probably won't mean anything to you-"

"Good that you know that," Wonwoo commented, but Jeonghan chose to ignore him.

"But I mean it. He just confessed everything to me. This is the first time I'm hearing about all of this... and... I can't- and I won't support that. I don't need you to forgive me, I know that won't happen instantly. But I swear to God, Y/N, you can think whatever you want of me, but please don't ever think I'd ever support a guy like that." He took another step forward. "When the accident happened, I heard that you got hit by a drunk driver. Not that... he was the drunk driver."

Still, no words from you, nor Mingyu or Jihoon.

"Anyway," Jeonghan sighed and got ready to turn around, the open doors still waiting for all of you. "I'm sorry." With those last words, he disappeared again, leaving your party in the cold hallway. In silence.

"Oh, wow..."

You couldn't hold back your scoff as you took a step forward, letting Wonwoo's hand drop to his side.

"He didn't mean any of that." You rolled your eyes.

"Huh?" Mingyu's eyebrows shot up as he glanced at you, his puppy eyes reflecting the light perfectly.

"You can't believe anything coming from that guy's mouth." You explained, still not entertaining the possibility of there being any good intentions behind your cousin's actions.

The younger CEO was still confused. "Then why did he say he was sorry?"

"To manipulate us maybe? Make us feel guilty? Give in?" Jihoon thought out loud, joining you and turning around to face the other two men. "Y/N, I wouldn't believe anything he said. She would know." Everyone nodded in synch.

Wonwoo nudged his head towards the door, where the security man was still waiting for you. "Let's get this over with."

-

Each person involved was back in the room. Exodus Entertainment was on the right table, while you and the guys were sitting on the left one. The jury of the very far right side, sitting along the wall was already gazing at you - excitement and interest radiating off them. Judge Kang was back in her seat, her glasses low on the bridge of her nose as she quietly went through the papers in front of her again, which seemed to have gotten more over the break.

If you thought your heart had been pumping hard earlier, while you were seated on the witness stand, it was safe to say, it was about to explode once you had entered the room again. Right where you had left your fear behind.

"Alright," Miss Kang started, taking off her glasses with a deep breath as she let her fingers rake through her hair. "Before we start, does the plaintiff or the defendant have anything to say? You may speak now."

You exchanged glances with Jihoon, who shook his head, telling you to keep low, but your attention was quickly taken away once Jeonghan left his chair to stand up, buttoning his suit jacket and raising his hand.

"Your Honour."

Miss Kang sighed with a forced smile. "Yes, Mister Yoon?"

"May I come forward?"

"Yes, you may."

Each pair of eyes in the room followed him as you abandoned the confused faces of Sehun and Chanyeol, making his way to the middle of the room and the podium. Either time moved painfully slowly, or he moved in slow motion, but either way, the pace was too slow, and you could feel the scream of frustration boiling up in your throat.

Jeonghan cleared his throat and straightened his back. Here we go.

"Your Honour. After consoling my client, we have come to an agreement that I would like to exclaim now."

"Please do," the judge commented on his statement.

"My client, Exodus Entertainment, would like to withdraw their lawsuit against Oksan & Co."

The room fell quiet. This lasted for a second before the next round of tumult rushed through it.

"Excuse me, Mister Yoon?" Miss Kang raised her voice in order to speak over the hushed sounds coming from the jury on the right side. Your eyes were frantically moving from side to side, trying to catch any reaction so you'd know which one to share.

"With immediate effect, Exodus Entertainment takes back each claim made against the defendant Oksan & Co."

Your head immediately shot to Jihoon who kept his gaze straight on Jeonghan, his mouth slightly agape as he was still trying to grasp the situation.

"What's going on here?" You could hear Mingyu whisper from your left, only to be interrupted by the loud voice of Chanyeol slashing through the uproar.

"Your honour-"

Jeonghan cut him off. "My client, Park Chanyeol, also pledges guilty to the charges made against him-"

The sudden knock of wood-on-wood, thanks to the Judge's hammer, let the room calm down again. Chanyeol chose to keep standing up while Sehun leaned back in his chair, a faint smirk making its way onto his face. The jury immediately quieted down along with your group, who still had to let more words drop than Mingyu just had. Jeonghan stood still on the podest.

"Mister Yoon," with the hammer still in her hand, Miss Kang started talking. "Are you aware of what you are doing right now? This will have an immediate effect."

"Yes, your Honour. I am very sorry for the waste of time and patience."

"Your Honour!" Chanyeol raised his hand hastily. "May I speak to my lawyer for a second?"

"Oh," your cousin lowered his head slightly, his voice loud and clear echoing through the speakers. "With immediate effect, I am also withdrawing from my role as Mister Park's lawyer. Thank you." Without another word, Jeonghan took a step back and turned around. After a quick glance in your direction and a tight smile, he passed your tables, only to take a seat on one of the benches behind you, usually preserved for public interests.

Judge Kang didn't even try to hide the amusement making her lips curl into a grin.

"Wow," she chuckled lowly, "Well," she cleared her throat, intertwining her fingers on top of the wooden surface. "Mister Park, you don't seem to have a lawyer to talk to anymore. Anything else you'd like to say?"

You zoned out whatever sorry excuse of an answer he gave her as you turned around, finding Jeonghan's eyes already boring a hole into your head.

"What are you doing?" You whispered, hoping he'd be able to read your lips. You only got a small smile and a nod in return.

"Mister Park-"

"This is a shitshow! What kind of fucking bullshit is this here?!"

"Mister Park, let m-"

"How the fuck is he even allowed to do that?!"

"Mister-"

"I swear to God, I will fucking sue every-"

"Security!" 

Miss Kang's final string of patience officially broke as she called out for one of the men on the side to step in. They acted quickly as two rushed up to each side of Chanyeol's big form which had made its way to the middle of the courtroom, getting dangerously close to the judge.

"You can't do-"

"I can, and I did," she simply told him, making him shut his mouth immediately before she quickly continued, putting her glasses back on as she read out loud. "Mister Park, I will see you again in five days as you will be facing twelve charges of sexual harassment, four charges of sexual assault, forgery of state-protected documents, as well as now contempt of court." She sent a smile his way. "We will speak again. Get him out of my courtroom." Before he was pushed out of the room through a door on the left wall.

Only then were you able to realise what had just happened. You could feel everyone take in a deep breath as soon as he had left the courtroom.

"What... what just happened?" Jihoon hushed underneath his breath, his hands placed on the top of his table as he glanced around the room.

"Well," the judge smiled into the crowd. "Each day, you experience something new." She paused for a second before continuing. "May the defendant please rise."

Still slightly out of it, you felt Wonwoo's tug by your elbow, pushing you to stand up. You joined the other three, staring straight ahead as Miss Kang spoke to you.

"With immediate effect, you are acquitted as the lawsuit of theft and forgery filed by Exodus Entertainment has been dropped." She glanced up from her notes to smile at you. "You are excused. Congratulations."

What was she congratulating for? You didn't win...

You didn't lose, but yet you didn't win... at least it didn't feel like you did. This was the end. The end of it all. Why didn't it feel like it?

You must've overheard Jihoon thanking the judge as you were suddenly escorted out of the room, your bag not even on your shoulder, but in Wonwoo's grip as you left the room altogether. Each bench you passed, and even walking through the doors, back into the hallway could almost be described as a fever dream. The sudden turn of tables and twist of fate felt too good to be true and too much for your own body to handle. It didn't feel right.

"What the fuck was that?!" Wonwoo immediately exclaimed the second you had left the room. "What just happened?!"

Jihoon raised his hands in defence, just as speechless as everyone else. "I- I wish I could tell you."

"What was that move from Yoon?" Mingyu interjected, only getting shrugs in return. "So did he mean what he said?" Another round of shrugs.

A nudge on your arm brought you back. "Hey, you okay?" It was Jihoon. You nodded.

"What the hell happened?" You could only repeat what everyone else was also thinking. "Wh-" You stopped yourself as you were still pretty much unable to form full sentences.

Each one of you had their eyes on different corners of the hallway. Mingyu was focused on the wall, his hand continuously running through his hair. Wonwoo had his arms crossed in front of his chest as he walked up and down a short distance along the side. And Jihoon had chosen to sit down, his head in his hand as he took deep and clear breaths in. You were leaning against the wall, eyes switching between each person while you still tried to find the grasp on reality again.

"From my understanding now," the lawyer started. "Jeonghan turned his back on them... I guess... he maybe wasn't lying in the first place?"

"That's impossible," you scoffed.

"Why?" Jihoon wondered.

You shrugged. "Because that's not who he is."

"Is that what you think of me," your cousin's familiar voice made you turn to the side, taking a step back instantly to create a bigger distance between you two. He shook his head with a chuckle. "I know we've never been on good terms, but God... I wouldn't wish stuff like that upon my worst enemy. Why would I celebrate it happening to my cousin?"

"I'm not saying you celebrated it," you stated.

"Alright," he took a step to the side. "And I'm not going to support a fucking asshole as stupid as him." He found your eyes. "I meant what I said. I'm sorry." Maybe one day you'll be able to believe that he's not the total asshole you had always thought he was. Maybe. Just maybe.

He turned around, bowing his head to each one of you before making his way down the hall, leaving the hell of a building in the past.

"Jeonghan!" You stopped him by the call his name, making him turn around. You pushed yourself forward, stopping right next to Wonwoo.

"Thank you." It may not have been much, but at that point in time, it was all you could've given him.

A smile and a nod later your cousin vanished out the doors, the group of journalists you had already forgotten about immediately swarmed him, leaving almost no room to breathe.

It wasn't a lot, but it was a start. A slow one, but a start. With the memory of the past still in the back of your hand, you were able to thank him for what he had done, but that was about it for now. Yes, there was no deeper reason as to why he had done what he did, at least that from where you stood, but the past would still haunt you for quite a while. A past you no longer had to share with the devil himself though. He was brought to justice. You did it. Not you alone, you were very well aware of that. You saw what a group of united people could do. You watched justice get served. The right decisions were made.

"Well then," Wonwoo sighed out loud. "What does that mean for us now?" The question was clearly directed at Jihoon who had made his way to stop in front of you.

He shrugged. "There's still definitely a lot of paperwork due. All the claims were dropped, but I'm gonna make sure there's no involvement of any of you in his future charges, especially with Y/N." You thanked him with a nod. "But for now," he took a deep breath as his lips curled. "I'd say we did it."

"Why doesn't it feel as satisfying as it should be?" Mingyu suddenly wondered as he showed up on your left.

"Once you see him on TV being escorted behind bars, you'll feel it," the lawyer assured him, getting a chuckle from each of you in return.

"Alright," the older CEO clapped his hands after handing you back your over-the-shoulder bag. His eyes travelled to Mingyu, glancing at him over your head.

"Drinks?" The younger one threw into the room, getting a groan of satisfaction from Jihoon in return.

"Oh, fuck yeah!" Shocking you with his choice of words.

You chuckled at the reaction that followed from the others, watching the pep in his step with amusement.

A hand on your shoulder made you look up to your right. The usual so cold eyes, suddenly turned warm, were already looking at you.

"Drinks?" His voice in his usual depth, sent a wave of warmth into your cheeks.

You bit down on your lip, trying to hide the smile on your face. A faint thought erupted from the depths of your memory. Something you had almost dared to forget. 

"There's one more thing I'd like to do."

Thank you for reading my loves🫶🏼

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[kiwibongos]

im writing Something for a little fic and i was putting stuff in my notes for later on and it really just made me realize like how fucked up hajime is after all the Horrors. like, emotionally. him rediscovering emotions entirely. (maybe someone has talked abt this before, i just wanna store this here)

because when he's less of a hollow shell, all there is is grief and guilt in his brain. but then as time goes on, he slowly rediscovers what it means to be human, and learns these feelings again one by one. and it has to be such an agonizing process too ? and when they do happen, theyre all extremely overwhelming, out of the blue, and most likely even caused by really small things. my dude will eat a stale piece of bread or even smell expired dairy products, suddenly relearn disgust and feel ABSOLUTELY nauseous and just hurl over lmaoo

but for as for more serious topics, like properly feeling anger again, it'd be ticked off by little shit, bc he doesn't wanna lose control like that cause the frustration doubles. it'd get bad when he makes a mistake too. he'd freak the hell out, because izuru was the embodiment of perfection, of every talent cultivated into one single brain, so he *cant* mess up, but its too much for him to handle cause he's so used to being under that obligation and expectation, but now that he's losing his stability over all that, when he messes up just *slightly*, he feels ashamed and tries to fix it as fast as possible, whether or not its a big deal. itd definitely be really hard to get out of the mindset that, even though hes not izuru anymore, he has to be perfect. to him, he has to stay that way. cause if he fails at all, then he can't protect his friends anymore. does that make sense. the pressure would be literally crushing

also shock/surprise/excitement. everything was predictable and boring to him as izuru, so obviously all of that is still a huge issue that still lingers within him after the simulation, so he'd probably overcome that first and be caught off guard a lot bc, well, he's learning to be hajime again, he's not *exactly* the op superhuman genius anymore (in my head at least. cause when two minds practically mash together weirdly it creates a horrible hit-or-miss concoction lol) so even basic things become brand new to him, and hes fascinated and curious by everyone and everything. not like hes never seen it before, but its like hes experiencing it for the first time, even if its just mundane tasks in life, new methods and alternatives to things, etc. he's generally a very observant guy, and would also pick up on little traits and habits from all his friends. i have the feeling people would rub off on him extremely easily

love, serenity and happiness itself would be extremely hard to tackle and learn, or even notice? i think of so many scenarios of how this could happen. cause like sure he can feel joy, he can be glad, proud, relieved, and smile because his friends are there. but he's still yet to experience what happiness truly is, what it means to him, and it's not something he can do alone. so it just takes a while for that big boom to happen. perhaps its up to interpretation how it happens, go for it idc i have alot of scenarios stirring up in my brain, but overall, i think him actually bursting with happiness and feeling genuine peace within himself, and realize hes grateful for the life he has, and the future he got to choose, would probably be caused in the process of moving to jabberwock island. just seeing all his friends on the boat and knowing they've made it this far, and theyre going to be starting a new life on this island, and that theyre safe, would be enough to just like hit him. like Ough. and thats when he actually consciously realizes that he's happy, when every other waking moment, there's been some kind of empty pit in his stomach eating at him for so long

on top of all of this, he cant really control his emotions very well, either. thats also another massive con to all of it, and a downside of relearning these things because of how strongly they came swinging back. its alot to handle. even if theres so much knowledge packed in his brain, one little thing like that could be enough to make him bluescreen. so he ends up just going on autopilot or stuffing all of it away, just to make the bad stuff stop. (it becomes a very unhealthy habit that bites him in the ass later. everyone is mad at him for not taking care of himself. hajime is then swaddled into a blanket with a kiss on the forehead)

anyway theres probably more to add and id get into the nitty gritty of specific shit but i had to impulsively dump this here so might as well put up the basics. makes me so excited to work on this fic more, even if its in a more somber, different context, i just love to think about hajime and how he works through his emotions and picking up his old traits. yknow, being himself. but at the same time he isn't doing it alone. let my boy be happy. let him find himself again and move on from izuru