#i think i could even safely play again if not Right Now then eventually. just based on the way my related Issues™️ have healed. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

inkedinshadows · 7 months ago

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Nights and Days

Pairing: Azriel × reader

Summary: Azriel and Y/N are on a mission in Illyria, but as they move from one camp to another, they’re caught in a blizzard and are forced to find shelter in the nearest inn. Thanks to the shadowsinger, there's only one bed.

Warnings: 18+, smut, oral (f receiving), fingering, p in v, just a sprinkle of shadow play, language, lots of witty banter

Word count: 6.3k

A/N: this is my first time writing smut, so I'd really appreciate it if you let me know what you think 🥺

Groups of rebels had begun to appear all over Illyria, claiming that Rhys was not a good High Lord, that a low-born bastard was not suited to be their general, and that training their women was nothing more than a waste of time.

After two weeks of diplomacy that led to absolutely nothing, Rhys had dispatched the Inner Circle to deal with the rebels. Mor and Amren had stayed in Velaris to make sure nothing happened, but the others had been sent out to Illyria. And Y/N had been paired up with Azriel.

They were flying from one war camp to the next—Y/N trying to focus on anything other than Azriel holding her close as he flew—when it started to snow.

“Is it safe to keep going?” she asked him, glancing at his beautiful wings flapping behind him.

“Would you rather I land now? In the middle of nowhere?” Azriel looked down at her with a little smirk on his face. “Give me some credit, Y/N. I can handle a little snow.”

She rolled her eyes at him. “Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot you’re a big, tough Illyrian warrior. My bad.”

He didn't answer, but she didn't need to look at him to know he was still smirking. That annoyingly attractive smirk always made her want to kiss him. She focused on the forest below, on anything other than his lips and how close they’d be if she would just turn her head his way.

They flew in silence for just a few more minutes before the snow began to fall more heavily. Y/N simply looked at Azriel with a raised eyebrow, not bothering to use words.

“You’re insufferable, you know that?” he said when he noticed her expression, but there was a hint of amusement in his voice. “Camp is not that far. We can still make it.”

“Azriel, did you wake up this morning and just decided to be stupid?” She pointed at the grey sky above them, where more clouds were gathering with the promise of more snow to come. “You see that, right? It’s already late and we both know it’ll only get worse. We won’t reach the next camp before it turns into a blizzard. Besides, I’m freezing my ass off out here.”

His only answer was a low chuckle. “Oh, yeah? The poor princess is freezing her little ass off?”

She smacked him on the shoulder. “My ass is anything but little, shadowsinger. Shouldn’t you find us a shelter or something, instead of making fun of me?”

“Said the one who just called me stupid,” he pointed out. He lifted a brow, flashing her another one of those smirks. “Maybe you should apologize for that, and I might think about landing somewhere.”

She cocked her head, unsure if he was messing around or not. “I refuse to apologize for telling the truth. And you’d better land soon, or I’ll kick your ass when you do.”

Azriel’s laugh echoed in her ears, and it took all her focus not to smile just at that sound she so rarely got to hear. “As if you could actually kick my ass.”

If her arms hadn’t been wrapped around his neck, she would have crossed them over her chest. Or maybe she would have used them to strangle him, if only it wouldn't mean they'd fall out of the sky. Eventually, she settled to roll her eyes again. “Azriel, I’m being serious.”

Though she enjoyed their usual banter and she knew as well as everyone that she could never kick his ass, she hadn’t lied. Even with her Illyrian leathers, she was starting to freeze out there in the snow, and there was no way they would reach their destination without being caught in a full-blown blizzard.

“Relax. Despite what you think, Y/N, I’m not stupid.” He gestured to something below them just as she opened her mouth to protest. “It’s an inn. You would have noticed it already, if only you hadn’t been so busy complaining.”

“Shut up,” she grumbled, squinting to see through the trees and the snow. But as Azriel glided down, she finally saw it. It was a rather large building for an inn in the middle of the woods—many Illyrians probably passed through it—so there was a high chance of finding a couple of rooms to spend the night in.

Azriel landed and gently set her on the ground. Together, they headed for the door and were welcomed inside by the warmth of a fire in the corner of the room. She shook the snow off her hair as she took in their surroundings—a few tables full of Illyrian warriors, most of them drinking and laughing quite loudly.

“We ran out of double rooms.” The innkeeper looked at them as they approached, apparently too bored to even bother with greetings. “But we’ve still got a few single ones.”

Before she could tell him that two rooms were perfect, Azriel was already answering. “We need only one, actually.”

Next thing she knew, he had grabbed her hand and was leading her up the stairs, a key now clutched in his fingers. She waited for the door to close behind them before she turned to him with a frown. “What the hell was that? Why only one room?”

Azriel tossed his pack on the floor and replied as if the answer was obvious. “The hall was packed with drunk Illyrians.”

“So?”

He looked at her then, and she couldn’t quite understand what she saw in his eyes. Was it concern? Or frustration because she still didn’t realize something he thought was so simple?

“I’m not letting you sleep in another room alone, when a bunch of drunk Illyrians have just seen you, probably the only female here, walk in.”

Well, that was not what she expected. But as she thought it over, she couldn’t deny he had a point. She was able to hold her own in a fight, just not against fully trained warriors, and she didn't want to take any risk, especially when it was just one night.

Not knowing what to answer, she looked around the room, which consisted of only one bed and a small dresser—lame and boring, but it would do. Except for the one single bed.

She watched as Azriel sat on an old rug, the only decoration there was. “And what are you doing now, exactly?”

He shrugged, with that same expression that seemed to tell her the answer was obvious. “I'll take the floor, you take the bed.”

She almost laughed at that. “You can't sleep on the floor, not with your wings. I'll do it.”

“I'll be fine,” he replied, and extended his wings behind him as if to prove it. “Why would you want to sleep on the floor anyway?”

“Because I don't want you to do it,” she answered matter-of-factly. “Now get your ass off that floor, shadowsinger.”

Azriel did no such thing and instead leaned back against the wall and extended his legs in front of him. Her gaze dropped to his thighs, the muscles shifting with the movement.

“Why would I do that? It's comfortable here.”

She looked up again, her arms crossed over her chest. “It's not and you know it.”

Both of them too stubborn to give in, they glared at each other. She made no move to sit on the bed, and he made no move to get up. They probably could have spent hours like this, but she couldn't stand the idea of Azriel sleeping on a half-consumed rug, even if it meant she'd do it.

“You wouldn't want to face the rebels with a sore body tomorrow, would you?” she tried, hoping it'd make him think straight.

“I've slept on the ground before, I'll be fine. Big, tough Illyrian warrior, remember?” His lips twitched up, and amusement glinted in his hazel eyes. “Just take the bed, Y/N. We have a long day ahead of us.”

“Which is exactly why you should sleep on the bed, Az,” she snapped before taking a deep breath and speaking more calmly. “I'm just the backup. It doesn't matter if I'm sore.”

“It matters to me.”

His words hung heavily in the air, and she swallowed, not sure how to react to them or to the fervor in his voice. There was an intensity in his eyes that she’d never seen before and, unable to his gaze any longer, she blinked.

“You’re not going to budge, are you?” she asked with a sigh, her arms falling back to her sides.

“No.” And there it was again, that teasing grin she usually wanted to kiss. Right now, though, she felt more like punching him for his stubbornness. It outmatched even her own. “So I suggest you listen and take the bed. You need some rest.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Oh, and you don't?”

This time, it was his turn to sigh and roll his eyes at her. “Y/N, I’ll be fine. I’ve slept in worse conditions, and it’s only just one night anyway.”

And yet, the thought of him sleeping on that rug while she was all comfortable on the bed didn’t sit right with her. Just like her well-being mattered to him, his mattered to her. Maybe it was because he’d admitted it, or because he’d rather sleep on the floor than let her stay in another room when the place was full of Illyrians. Or maybe she was just trying to find some kind of excuse, but the words were out before she could think better of them.

“Sleep on the bed. With me.”

Azriel’s eyes widened, and she immediately regretted even thinking about it. “I beg your pardon?”

“I mean… it’s just…” she stuttered, her cheeks heating up as she looked away. What a huge mistake she’d just made. Just because he cared about her didn’t mean he’d want to share a bed with her. What was she even thinking? “I know it’s small and there’s not much space, but I just… I thought it’d still be more comfortable than the floor… you know?” Her voice trailed off, and she stared down at her feet.

Deafening silence filled the room, and then Azriel finally spoke, his tone cautious. “And that’s all you were asking?”

She frowned, not sure what else she might have been asking. But she quickly realized what words she had used and how that could potentially sound like something more than an offer to share the bed. Sleep on the bed. With me. Cauldron, she was so stupid. Her face turned an even deeper shade of red. When was the last time she had blushed?

“No, I wasn’t— that’s not what I—” She couldn’t get the words out, and it didn’t help that her mind was now wandering toward certain scenarios that involved the two of them, a bed, and very little clothing. She turned away from him and mumbled, “Whatever.”

“I think this is the first time I've ever seen you speechless.” There was amusement in his voice, and she knew the asshole was smirking once more. “You should watch your word choice if that’s not what you intended to ask.”

“Yeah, I know. Sorry,” she murmured as she reached for her pack, but when she took her nightgown out, she realized there was no place to go to get changed. How was she supposed to change in front of him after such an embarrassing mistake? So instead, she delayed the moment she’d have to do it by trying to explain again. “It wasn’t my intention to imply anything. It came out wrong.”

She could feel his eyes on her as he answered. “I noticed. What was your intention, then?”

The look she gave him was one of annoyance. He knew exactly what her intention was, and he just liked to mess with her. She glared at him for a moment before she replied, “I meant what I said. I don’t want you to sleep on that rug, and you don’t want me to do it either. So, the only other option is that we share the bed.”

“Mh, I see.” His lips tugged up in a self-satisfied grin that just made her want to hit him to see it disappear. Not that she could hit him even if she really wanted to. Azriel would block her blow with little effort. But how could she have ever wanted to kiss him?

“So sleeping next to me is the only option?” he added.

“You know what?” she snapped, gesturing to the rug where he was still sitting like it was the most comfortable place he’d ever been. “I changed my mind. Sleep on the floor. I don’t care.”

He chuckled. Chuckled. Cauldron boil her.

She turned her back on him and, without giving it any second thought, she began undressing. She hadn’t realized how warm the Illyrian leathers were until she shivered as soon as she took them off.

“It seems like you’re cold,” Azriel drawled from behind her.

“I’m not,” she replied. She put on her nightgown and sought refuge under the covers. “Not for long, anyway.”

How was Azriel going to spend the night on a rug, without a blanket? When he didn’t answer, she considered maybe asking him one last time to share the bed. Out of the goodness of her heart, she supposed.

But then Azriel spoke again, amusement clear in his voice. And the goodness of her heart be damned.

“You're cold, aren't you?”

She sighed, wrapping the blanket tighter around her body. “No.”

“Liar.”

“Prick.”

“I'm the prick? You're the one who suggested we should share the bed.”

Y/N resisted the urge to turn on her side and face him. Maybe it was stupid and childish of her, but she kept lying with her back to him. “I don't see how that makes me a prick, Az. Besides, you're the one who made fun of me because of it, which means you're the prick here.”

His voice still carried a sense of playfulness as he answered. “I made fun of you because you stumbled over your words like a fool. It was quite amusing, to be honest.”

Instead of replying, she slid a hand out from under the blanket and flipped him off over her shoulder. As she hid it again and curled up in the bedsheets, Azriel’s soft laugh made her smile despite herself.

She heard some noise and, assuming he was getting changed and ready for the night, she closed her eyes. But her mind was running wild.

Images of his hands on her. Of her hands on him. Their lips touching, first tenderly, then passionately. Their bodies pressed together as pleasure overcame them. All scenarios she had never let herself fully consider before, now evoked by Azriel's misunderstanding of her words. Scenarios she now knew for sure would never happen if the way he'd teased her for even suggesting sharing the bed was any indication.

“Make room for me?”

His voice was so close to her that she started, her head snapping around to find him standing next to the bed. He had taken off his leathers and was now wearing loose pants and a shirt. His wings were tucked in tight behind him—those beautiful wings that she knew were bigger than Cassian's and Rhysand's. She still wasn't sure she should believe Mor about the correlation between an Illyrian's wingspan and other body parts.

“Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you,” he added with a small smile.

“You and your absurdly silent steps,” she grumbled, but she was already moving to the other side of the bed.

Only that there wasn’t exactly an ‘other side’, not when the bed was barely big enough for both of them. As Azriel slipped under the sheets, she found herself with her back pressed against his chest. His familiar scent of night-chilled mist and cedar filled her senses, and his warmth seeped through her, chasing away the remnants of the cold that even the blanket hadn’t yet managed to rid her of.

“Tell me you don’t move a lot when you sleep,” she said as he settled behind her. “Because if you push me off, I’ll make you regret not staying on that rug.”

His laugh skittered down her back. “You always have something to say, don't you?”

“I promise you, the moment there will be nothing to say, I will shut up,” she replied with a chuckle.

Silence fell and Y/N nestled more against his side. She just couldn't help it. Feeling him so close, their bodies pressing together... it was intoxicating, and she wanted to stay like that forever. She hesitated a moment, and then she decided that she might as well do it: grabbing his arm, she wrapped it around her waist and laced their fingers together, their intertwined hands resting against her stomach. Azriel tensed behind her, and she thought he might pull away, but he didn’t. Instead, he released a deep breath that tickled the back of her neck.

“I would never let you fall off the bed,” he murmured. His voice was so close to her ear that it almost made her shiver. And as if to show he really meant what he said, Azriel draped his wings around her.

Y/N suddenly had a lump in her throat. Being enveloped in his wings was somehow more intimate than lying so close to each other. “Glad to hear it,” was all she could think about. After a second, she added in a whisper, “And thank you for not letting me sleep alone.”

Azriel’s arm tightened around her waist, his breath warm against her neck. When he spoke, she could tell by his tone alone that he wanted to say more than just, “You're welcome.” She didn't push him though. He'd tell her when and if he decided to.

She closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep, letting the sound of the blizzard outside lull her, but with Azriel holding her it was nearly impossible. Wrapped in his arms and wings, she felt safe and protected. Everything else seemed to disappear until it was just the two of them in their small cocoon.

“Can you turn over?”

Her eyes opened at his question, but she didn't move. To face him would mean being only inches away from him. She didn't trust herself to be that close to him. To his lips.

“Why?”

“Just turn over, Y/N,” he whispered. “Please.”

It was the vulnerability in his voice—the barely audible ‘please’—that had her giving in. She had never heard him say it before, not like that.

But as she complied, her face was even closer to his than she'd anticipated. Their noses were almost touching, and she made a point not to let her gaze drop to his lips.

Azriel didn't say anything. They stared into each other's eyes for a few moments or maybe an hour—Y/N didn't know. The one thing she knew was that her heart was beating faster in her chest, and it only got worse when he brushed her cheek, his touch gentle and soft. She smiled, and the movement caused his gaze to dip to her mouth. She waited for him to look up again, but he didn't.

Her smile turned into a little smirk. “Are you just going to stare at my lips all night, or do you plan to actually do something about it?”

Azriel looked at her again, and though he tried to look annoyed, she could see a hint of amusement in his eyes. “Why do you always have to make such quick-witted comments?”

“Shut up and kiss me,” she replied before she even knew what she was saying. She didn't regret it though, because he did it.

And the world shrank till there was just Azriel.

His lips were soft against hers, warm and inviting. His hand moved from her cheek to the back of her head, his fingers tangling in her hair as he pulled her closer. She melted against him, opening up for his tongue to slip inside, tasting her slowly, almost reverently. Her heart was beating so fast it might have jumped out of her chest.

She'd wanted this to happen for the longest time, and now that it was real, the leash she'd kept on herself vanished. Every feeling, every emotion she'd stifled for so long, now rushed to the surface like a tidal wave.

What had started as a tender kiss soon turned into something passionate and greedy. She whimpered softly against his lips, and her hands began to make their way down to the hem of his shirt.

“Y/N.” Azriel's whisper stopped her as she looked into his eyes. She could see her own need reflected there. “Are you sure about this?”

“I don't look sure enough to you?” She raised an eyebrow. “Maybe next time I should just send you a note and—”

Azriel silenced her with another kiss. “You and your sarcastic answers,” he murmured with a smile.

Y/N giggled and cupped his cheek, brushing her thumb against his lips. “I mean it, Az,” she said, her tone softer now. “I'm sure about it.”

“Good.” He pulled her flush against him as his hands roamed down her back. “Because if I start, I don't think I could stop.”

“Good,” she repeated before she kissed him again.

Y/N tugged on his shirt, and they parted long enough for her to take it off, though it took a bit of struggle to undo the clasps on his back and free his wings. She'd seen him shirtless before, mostly when he was training—he was a real feast for the eye—but now she got to touch him, to run her hands across his torso and feel him shudder. His mouth descended on her neck in response, leaving a trail of wet kisses while his hands gripped her backside.

“You were right, princess,” he murmured, his breath hot against her skin. “Your ass is definitely not little.”

She chuckled as he kneaded it. “Told you.”

Azriel hummed, planting one last kiss on her neck before he shifted position and Y/N found herself pressed down on the mattress, the shadowsinger now on top of her. As she pulled him closer for their lips to meet yet again, his hands caressed her legs, trailing up her thighs and slipping under her nightgown.

She held her breath as he brushed past her panties, lingering just long enough to make her shiver. He then moved up her body, causing the fabric to rise and reveal her soft flesh.

Y/N broke the kiss, a small sigh leaving her lips when Azriel’s hands reached her breasts. He smiled at the sound, and as their eyes met, his gaze was so full of desire that her core clenched.

She wanted him. She needed him.

Before she could reach between them to push down his pants, Azriel gently stopped her by grabbing her wrists, sensing what her intention was. “Not yet,” he murmured.

She frowned. A slight tug was all it took for him to release her hands, though she didn't try to undress him again. “Why not?”

And there it was again, that smirk. But now, with him on top of her, both of them half naked, she didn't simply want to kiss it. No, she wanted do all the things she'd never let herself consider.

“Because I want to see you first, princess.”

Azriel was already pushing her nightgown up, but as usual, she couldn't keep her mouth shut. “So it's official? You're calling me princess now? You've never done that before.”

He looked down at her with so much desire that it seemed to set her body on fire. “I've never been about to fuck you before,” he answered, his voice low and sultry.

Her thighs clenched together, but before she could come up with a response, Azriel removed her nightgown. Her skin was already so heated she barely felt the bite of the cool air, and it was completely forgotten when he ran his hands all over her body, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

“You're so beautiful,” he whispered as he leaned down to take one of her nipples in his warm mouth, a soft moan escaping her as she shivered.

Her fingers tangled in his hair to keep him close, and she arched against him when his tongue flicked out to tease her.

“And you're so responsive,” he murmured. Hooking a scarred finger into the waistband of her panties, he pulled them down her legs. The scent of her arousal wafted through the room as Azriel nudged her legs open and settled in between them.

Y/N was about to tell him to hurry, her need to feel him against and inside her now almost overwhelming. But she couldn’t form the words, not as Azriel pushed his hips against hers and she felt the evidence of his own arousal pressing hard against her wet core.

His hands caressed her sides, her ass, her thighs, and yet he never touched her where she needed it most.

“Azriel…” she complained, eyes locked on him. She moved her hips to grind against his erection, seeking some sort of friction, and she was rewarded by his sharp inhale. But it still wasn't enough.

“Be patient, Y/N.” His mouth descended on her neck again, biting the soft spot where it met her shoulder. “I want to taste you first. I want to worship every inch of you.”

Even though she closed her eyes at his little nips, she shook her head. “Azriel, I appreciate it. I really do. But you have no idea how long I've waited for this.” Her breath hitched when his tongue swirled around her nipple again. “We can leave the worshipping for later. I need you now.”

“You need me, uh?” He kissed her other breast, and she bucked her hips against him once more. “And you've waited a long time for this?”

Y/N looked at him again, her fingers still clutching his hair. She nodded and realized her mistake too late—a new mischievous gleam entered Azriel's hazel eyes.

His lips trailed down her stomach and toward her belly button. Each kiss sent a shiver right to her core. “Then you can wait a little longer.”

She groaned, her patience now at its limit. “Azriel, you—”

A gasp cut her off as he licked a stripe up her dripping folds. She couldn't tell who moaned first when Azriel tasted her once more, his tongue flicking over her clit.

Her fingers tightened in his black curls and her head fell back on the pillow. Azriel's lips closed around her clit and she clamped a hand on her mouth to keep quiet as he gently sucked on it.

His shadows began to slither up her body, their touch cool against her heated skin. Her breathing quickened and she had to hold back a moan when his tongue was replaced by a finger slowly sliding inside her folds.

But it didn't move. Azriel looked up at her and she wished she could somehow capture the picture: his head between her legs, those beautiful hazel eyes focused on her with an almost predatory intent.

“Don't go all quiet on me now, princess,” he murmured against her skin. “I want to hear all your pretty noises.”

A tendril of shadow brushed against her hand, and she removed it from her mouth. “Az, the other rooms—”

He curled his finger to hit that soft, spongy spot inside her that had her see stars, and she couldn't stop the moan that left her lips.

“I don't care if someone hears you.” His voice was a low, almost commanding growl. “Let them hear you. Let them know you're with me.”

She was about to answer, to tell him she wasn't sure she should, but Azriel added a second finger, and she lost all control, another small cry of pleasure slipping out.

Azriel seemed satisfied because his smirk reappeared. “If I had known this is all it took to put a stop on the witty comments, I would have done it a long time ago.”

Y/N wanted to make one of those very witty comments to prove him wrong, to show him she hadn't become helpless just because of how good he made her feel, but his tongue circled her clit again and Mother above, she was helpless.

“Do you want to come, princess?”

Unable to form even a coherent thought, all she could do was nod, her body on the brink of release as his fingers curled once more, drawing a moan from deep in her throat.

“Use your words, Y/N.”

“Yes… yes, please,” she panted.

But instead of keeping going, of driving her over that sweet, craved edge, Azriel placed a kiss to her inner thigh and slowly removed his fingers from her folds. He even moved away from her, standing up at the foot of the bed.

She groaned, pushing herself up on her elbows to glower at him. “Azriel, you get back here right now.”

He only grinned. “Ah, there she is.”

“If you're doing this just because you missed my comments, you should know that I—”

The words died on her tongue as soon as his hands swiftly undid the buttons of his pants. Her eyes followed his every movement as he pushed them down his legs, watching his muscles shift and his wings unfold ever so slightly to keep him balanced.

He wasn't wearing any underwear.

The realization caused her brain to stop working, and the sight of his naked body took her breath away. Maybe the rumors about Illyrian wingspans were true after all.

Her mouth dry, she swallowed before finally speaking again. “Azriel,” she repeated, her voice quivering with barely restrained desire. “Get back here right now.”

For once, he obliged without questioning, his grin wide.

Climbing onto the bed, he crawled up her body until his cock pressed against her entrance, her need for him now through the roof.

Their eyes met, and slowly—too slowly—Azriel pushed in, stretching her inch by delicious inch, both of them releasing a moan when he bottomed out, his hips flush against her.

“Fuck,” he groaned, the sound shooting straight down to her core. “Fuck, Y/N... you feel incredible.”

She had no words to describe how he felt inside her. ‘Incredible’ was an understatement, but her mind was too foggy to think of something else. The only thing she was sure of was that she needed him to move.

“Azriel,” she breathed as she wrapped her legs around him. He shuddered when she accidentally brushed his wings with her toes. “Please, move. Now.”

With his elbows on either side of her head, he leaned down to kiss her, pulling out almost all the way. “I love hearing you beg for it,” he whispered against her lips, and rocked back into her with a quick roll of his hips before she could even think of a response.

He didn’t even try to go slow, instead immediately setting a relentless pace that left her panting, but she didn’t mind. Every choked sound and breathless moan were swallowed by his kiss, their tongues swirling together. Her hands found their way into his hair, around his neck, down his back, and her nails scraped along his warm and slightly sweaty skin while he thrust into her, her hips rising to meet his.

Azriel’s own groans and whimpers were music to the ears, each of them bringing her closer to release. As if he knew her body well enough already, he seemed to sense it too, because his lips left hers to trail down her neck.

“That’s it, princess,” he praised. His clipped voice let her know he was probably trying to hold back his own impending orgasm. “Come for me.”

His shadows flew in the little space between their bodies to tease her clit, drawing a guttural groan from her. It was like nothing she’d ever felt before—cool against her hot skin, a barely-there touch that yet was enough to make her shudder and whine. But it was the uniqueness of it all that sent her toppling over the edge.

A loud cry broke from her as her vision blurred and her body tensed, her nails slightly digging into Azriel’s back while he slowed his thrusts to draw out her pleasure. But he soon resumed his punishing pace, his hips slamming into hers almost frantically, the sound of skin on skin filling the small room as he chased his own release.

She choked out his name right as he stilled, hot spurts of cum filling her, his last few moans muffled when she pulled him in for another desperate kiss.

They were both panting by the time they broke apart, but neither of them tried to move. Azriel still lay buried deep inside her, and simply rested his forehead against hers, a smile on his lips that mirrored her own.

Despite his heavy breaths, his brows raised as he asked playfully, “So was the wait worth it?”

“It was,” she answered with a chuckle. Her hands came up to cup his face, her thumbs brushing over his cheekbones. “You certainly know what you’re doing, shadowsinger.”

Wrong words.

“Is that so?” His grin only widened, and he gave another roll of his hips that dragged a groan from the back of her throat.

She slapped him on the shoulder, but her smile matched his. “Smug ass.”

Azriel's soft laugh tickled her cheek as he kissed it. Slowly, he pulled out of her, leaving her with a feeling of emptiness.

Not ready to let him go just yet, she curled up in his arms as soon as he lay down next to her. Azriel immediately embraced her, holding her close to his chest, their legs tangled.

A comfortable silence settled over them as they bathed in the afterglow of sex, interrupted only by their soft breathing and the blizzard still raging outside.

As the minutes passed, Y/N struggled to keep her eyes open, but she had always wanted to trace the swirling lines of Azriel's tattoos, and now she had her chance. Her fingers danced along the Illyrian design, following the pattern from his neck to his arm, then lingering a bit longer on his sculpted pecs and feeling the muscle beneath her fingertips. His heart was beating fast, pounding in his chest.

“Can you promise me something?”

She glanced up at him, his eyes already fixed on her. The corner of her lips twitched upwards. “Depends on what it is.”

Azriel was silent for a long moment before he spoke again with a new seriousness in his tone. “Promise me that we’ll give this a chance. That we’ll give… us a chance.”

Her fingers halted their roaming, her heart skipped a bit, and a part of her whispered that she had heard that wrong, that she had misunderstood. No way he was actually asking her what she thought he was asking her, despite just having had sex.

She had to swallow the lump in her throat to be able to murmur, “Do you mean that?”

Azriel's eyes softened, like he knew she was even more vulnerable now than while they were fucking, and that whether her heart broke or not depended entirely on his answer.

“I’ve waited for this for a long time too, Y/N,” he said gently, cupping her cheeks to look right into her eyes. “I don’t want just this one night with you. I want all the nights you’ll give me.”

Y/N smiled then, so bright it could have lit up the whole room. She wanted to kiss him senseless, to hold him tight and never let go. And nothing was stopping her anymore, she realized, so she did just that.

She showered his face with tiny kisses. Every beautiful inch, from his nose to his jawline, from his eyebrow to his chin. Azriel's arms wrapped around her middle to pull her closer, and she relented her assault only when he chuckled.

Their eyes met again, and she knew there was no turning back now. But she would never turn back now.

“I’ll give you all the nights in the world, Az,” she finally said once the burst of joy subsided. “And the days, too. I'll give you anything you want.”

His smile was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. It was wider than ever before and the urge to touch his small dimples rushed through her—dimples she'd never known he had, but that she'd do anything to see again.

When he kissed her, it was slow yet passionate, gentle yet desperate, their breaths mingling, their hands caressing cheeks and running through hair.

“You're the only thing I want,” Azriel murmured once their lips parted. “Every night and every day. I want only you.”

Those were probably the most beautiful words she'd ever heard. Not even in her dreams did she imagine he would say them. Dwelling on what it would be like to share moments of passion was one thing, but this…

She moved to straddle him, mindful of his wings splayed out beneath him. She wanted to run her fingers down their length, and hopefully, sooner rather than later, she might get to do just that.

“Then I hope you're not too tired, shadowsinger.” She leaned down to trail kisses along his tattoo, but her eyes never left his. “Because you can't say something like that without expecting me to fuck you again.”

His hands tightened their grip on her thighs, her words enough to ignite the fire in him once more. “I'm yours, princess. We have all night.”

“All the nights,” she corrected him with a grin, already grinding on him. “And all the days.”

Maybe they would be facing the rebels with sore bodies, after all.

Tags: @mrsjna @navyblue-eternity @paintedbyshadows @highladyandromeda @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @azrielsmate3 @mollygetssherlockcoffee @mirandasidefics @tinystarfishgalaxy @cynthiesjmxazrielslover

(If I accidentally added someone who wanted to be tagged only in part 3 of A Helping Hand and not the general tag list, please let me know and I'll fix it)

#acotar #azriel #azriel shadowsinger #sjm #azriel × reader #fanfic #azriel x y/n #azriel spymaster #azriel smut #azriel fluff #one bed trope #shadowsinger

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burreauxsworld · 5 months ago

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Ours To Keep (2) | Joe Burrow

Angst/Fluff

Summary: Joe doesn’t have the best reaction to your news, and it causes some tension between the two of you.

••••••

You stared at Joe in confusion as he laughed.

“Good one, Y/N” he says, still laughing. “But if you’re going to play a prank on me, at least come up with a better joke” he adds as he calms down. “Joe, I’m not joking” you tell him quietly. “The acting was seriously top tier. How have you never shown that to me before? I mean the tears looked so real-“

“Joe I’m not kidding. I’m not trying to play a prank on you” you cut him off. “I’ve been nauseous all week, my boobs are incredibly sore, and I missed my period over a week ago” you explain, and he lets out a sigh. “There’s no possible way you could be pregnant. You’re on birth control. You have that thing in your arm” he reminds you, smiling again. “I think you’re being paranoid” he says causing you to scoff.

“Joe, this is serious-“

“You’re not pregnant. You sound crazy” he says pulling back from you. “Have I been working you too hard? Maybe it’s stress. Take the rest of the day off-“

“That doesn’t explain the positive pregnancy test on my bathroom counter” you argue starting to get aggravated. “I’ve been ignoring it for weeks. Hoping maybe I was a little bit crazy. But we weren’t exactly the most careful-“

“So you’re turning this around on me?” Joe asks, his jaw clenched. “No, I’m not-“

“That’s how it sounds. You were irresponsible and now you’re paying the price for it and taking it out on me” he spits with his eyes full of anger. “Last time I checked it takes two people for something like this to happen. I didn’t have sex with myself” you retort and he scoffs. “How could you let this happen? Do you know how much shit this is going to cause? I don’t need this right now. I have to go back to practice, and to be honest I’m not sure I even want you here right now. You’re dismissed for the day” Joe walked out of the office leaving you stunned.

You knew he might not have the best reaction but you didn’t think it would be like this. Joe has never spoken to you that way, even when he was at his worst. With tears in your eyes, you gathered your bag and slowly began to make your way toward the parking lot.

You had a lot of things running through your head, but one rash thought lingered and it made you sick to your stomach. It was going to be a long night.

•••

Later that night, you’re sitting on your couch with your laptop open in your lap. You decided to throw yourself into work, and Joe had a foundation event coming up that Robin asked you to help organize. Even mad at him you couldn’t let this go undone. His foundation was one of the most important things to him, and you kept telling yourself you were more so doing this for his parents. You’re about halfway through editing the announcement picture that would eventually be posted to the foundations instagram, when you heard a knock at your door.

Furrowing your brows, and setting your laptop on the glass coffee table, you walked over to the door and looked through the peep-hole. Your heart lurched at the sight of him. You open the door, and the two of you stare at each other for about a minute.

“You’re not here to throw me down the stairs, are you?” You ask, half joking.

Joe rolls his eyes, “can I come in?”

You move to the side and let him into your home. He kicks his shoes off, knowing you don’t like shoes on your light colored carpet. “What’s up? Why’d you stop by?” You ask, a sigh escaping your lips. You know exactly why he’s here, but you wanted to see what he had to say for himself. “I went home today after practice and had some time to think. The way I treated you was wrong and just absolutely disgusting” he says, stepping toward you, and you take a step back.

“I deserve that.” He says running his hand through his hair. “I never should have blamed you for this. This is just as much my fault, if not more. You did your part being safe, I’m the one that decided not to use condoms. That’s on me. I want you to know how sorry I am about today,” Joe says. You guys never breaking eye contact.

“You’re probably terrified, and I didn’t make it any easier-“

“That’s for sure.” You mutter. “Joe, I never meant for this to happen. And I’ve done a lot of thinking myself. I’m going to keep this baby. I’m not asking you for any help, I’m not asking you for any money. I’m fully prepared to do this by myself. I’ve started looking for another job-“

“Hang on a second-“

“You can sign your rights away. We don’t even have to tell anyone that the baby is yours. You’ll have no ties to it” you ramble, and he shakes his head. “That’s not what I want.” He states, his voice firm. “This is my kid, Y/N. Not just something I can pretend doesn’t exist. I want to do this with you, if you’ll let me” he pleads, reaching out to grab your hand.

“You really hurt me today, Joe.” You told him. “You made me feel like I ruined your life”

“I know, and I regret everything I said to you. I can’t even put into words how sorry I am. You didn’t ruin my life. Neither one of us could have anticipated this happening” he assures you. “I am so so sorry” he says, pulling you into his arms, wrapping you in a tight hug. “I’m still very upset with you. It’s going to take some time to fully forgive you” you tell him, and he frowns, but he understands.

“I have a doctors appointment in the morning, if you’d like to come” you offer. “It’s just to confirm everything and get a due date and all that fun stuff”

“I’ll drive and buy you breakfast” he says, looking down at you. “Speaking of food, I’m starving” you groan, and he lets out a laugh. “Alright, I guess I’ll feed you” he jokes, making his way to your kitchen. “Ooh, can you make that pasta that I like? I’m pretty sure I have all of the ingredients” you ask with pleading eyes.

“Yes, I can make you the pasta. Pick a movie, and shut that laptop. Work is over for the day” he orders.

“Sir, yes, sir”

•••

The Next Day

“Well congratulations, Y/N. You are indeed pregnant,” the doctor says, entering the room after your test results finally come back. “Both the urine and blood test came back positive. Judging by the numbers on your results it’s looking like you’re around 8 or 9 weeks pregnant, that’s around 2 months and a week.. Which would make your due date sometime in February, but we can’t be sure until we do an ultrasound” the doctor explains.

“The next course of action is going to be removing your nexplanon and doing an ultrasound” she explains.

You look over at Joe, who’s listening intently. He hasn’t said much since the two of you got here, but you’re giving him time. He wants to be involved, but he processes things a different way. You respect that.

“We can schedule the ultrasound for about a week from now. I don’t have any available ultrasound techs today. So I have a list of appointments, and you can choose what works best for you and your schedule. All of them are on Monday. There’s a 9am, 10am, 12pm, 3pm, and 4pm-“

“We can do Monday at 9am” Joe says, and you look over at him. “You have practice on Monday” you remind him. He shrugs. “We only watch film for the first two hours on Monday, you know that. They’ll be fine without me for an hour” he assures you. “We’ll do Monday at 9am” you tell the doctor, knowing Joe wasn’t going to let up.

“Perfect. Stop at the front desk to check out on your way back out. See you Monday. Congratulations, again” she smiles as she leaves the room. You look back over at Joe. “You okay?” You ask, and he nods. “I’m good. Now let’s go get you guys some breakfast,” he says, and a warm feeling spreads through your chest. You slip your hand in his and he leads you out of the room.

•••

“What can I get you guys to drink?”

“I’ll take a coffee with extra cream and sugar” you say, and Joe protests. “You can’t have coffee. Caffeine isn’t good for the baby” he says, and you shoot him a glare that’s strong enough to cut. The waitress looks between the two of you hesitantly. . “I can have a little bit of caffeine,” you argue, and look back at waitress. “Ignore him. I’ll have a coffee” you say with a smile. It’s Joe’s turn to roll his eyes, as he orders a water for himself.

Once the waitress walks away, you kick Joe’s shin under the table. “You’re not going to be one of those overprotective fathers who dictates what I eat, drink, and do. I’m an adult. I can handle myself”

He lets out a sigh, knowing not to argue because your hormones are high right now. “Please do your research before acting like a control freak. I can have up to 200 grams of caffeine a day,” you tell him, and he sighs. “I just want to keep the two of you safe,” he admits, and you start to feel bad for going off on him.

“I appreciate that, Joey, but we’re good. We can handle a little bit of caffeine” you assure him, a slight smile on your face. The waitress returns with your drinks, and the proceeds to ask if you’re ready to order your food. “Can I have two over medium eggs, with hash browns, and toast?” The waitress writes down your order, Joe looks confused, but orders his blueberry pancakes and the waitress goes to put the order in.

“You hate eggs,” Joe comments.

“The baby wants them.”

Joe laughs, tossing his head back. “What the baby wants, the baby gets”

~~~~~~~

Ahhh our guys won yesterday!! I’m so proud of them :)

#joe burrow #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow smut

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trickbxbes · 2 months ago

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okay, hear me out.. dae-ho nsfw hcs, in particular him with a reader who is into pain play, bdsm and all that jazz?

love your work btw!

So I can’t see Dae-Ho agreeing to hurt you at all, but I’ll try to work around that 🫡

𝐃𝐚𝐞-𝐇𝐨 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐒/𝐎 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐁𝐃𝐒𝐌 (𝟏𝟖+)

Warnings: NSFW, Switch! Dae-Ho, hickeys, edging, pretty much what the title implies,

The first time you brought up to Dae-Ho about experimenting, he was curious and trying to be brave. He wanted you to always feel good of course. But when you got into detail, he was a little taken back. “Pain…play? That’s a thing?”

He’d be uncomfortable inflicting pain. Especially if it involves hitting or drawing blood. He just, can’t. He’d get a little sad just thinking about it. He’s had a very negative history with violence, and wouldn’t want to put that on his beloved.

But he wouldn’t want to disappoint you either, so he’d try with the other aspects of BDSM!

He’d start by being rougher with you. His normal nips and kisses on the neck turning into dark hickeys. He’d soon realize that seeing you all marked up was actually incredibly arousing. Like you actually belonged to him.

^ You’d claw at his shoulder blades as he ruthlessly sucked on the sweet spot on your neck. “D..Dae-Ho..” and in response, he’d cover your mouth. You didn’t think you could get any wetter, but alas.

At first he wasn’t sure what to expect when you bring in the handcuffs, blindfold and gag. Things that wouldn’t cause you direct harm, but experiment with the idea of teasing to a new level. But once he had you there, listening to the way your wrists fought against its restraints, he didn’t mind. It meant you needed him.

^ His face was in between your thighs, lapping up all your juices. You were a whimpering mess, gaged and cuffed to the bed frame. Dae-Ho looked up at you a second, a glint of mischievousness in his eyes. “Are you still alright, (Y,n)?” Oh how you wanted to scream at him for stopping. But that’s what kept the gag on. You squirmed, whining desperately, trying to rut your hips into his face. Dae-Ho chuckled, shaking his head. He puts both hands on your thighs and pushes you down onto the bed again. “Patience, otherwise I’ll have to punish you, right?”

He’d try choking you if you really asked. He’d never do it hard enough where your face would change a color. But while he was fucking you senseless, his hand around your throat, he’d hear how animalistic your moans were. The differential desperation compared to your normal fucking.

Of course, after everything, he’d kiss every bruise, tend to you, check on you, and cuddle close.

BONUS!!

Now when you had convinced Dae-Ho to let you take the reins, he was more than a little worried. He did agree though, but you knew you had to ease into it.

You had his wrists tied to the bed frame with some lacy ribbon, soft to prevent any pain. You and him established a safe word, “Octopus.” You started off kissing down his body, slowly but surely. It wasn’t too different to when you were normally in charge, but this time, Dae-Ho couldn’t touch you. It took away a lot of his control. But you couldn’t help but notice the way his dick hardened even faster than normal at his helplessness.

Eventually, you moved to jerking and sucking him off while he was unable to do anything but feel. His senses were heightened thanks to the blindfold around his eyes. “(Y,n)~!” He mewled, his back arching. You giggle, licking his tip before pumping his base while speaking to him. “Hm? What is it, Dae-Ho?” You smirk at his whimpering self. Dae-Ho could barely get the words out. “G-gonna…mmph…! Gonna—“ And with that warning, you stop. Dae-Ho lets out an exasperated groan of desperation. “(Y,n)! P-please…! Please let me cum… (Y,n)!” He babbled your name like you were some sort of messiah, begging the same words like a prayer. His cock was throbbing hard in your hand, his hips thrusting upwards slightly.

He’d never admit it to you, but he loved being edged.

You caress his cock with your thumb, smirking. The gag was still an option, but you didn’t use it because, cmon, listen to him. “Mm, I dunno, will you be good for me?”

Dae-Ho nods frantically. “Yes~ yes…yes, yes yes. I’ll be good. I promise. I’ll be a good boy, your good boy, so fuck… please…!”

How could you say no to that?

#dae ho #dae ho squid game #dae ho x reader #squid game #squid game s2 #squid game x reader #squid game smut #dae ho smut #kang dae ho x reader #kang dae ho

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ahgasegotarmy116 · 4 months ago

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BANG-ABLE | Jeon Jungkook | Drabble 1

Summary: When your very curious robot boyfriend finds all of your old sex toys. Pairing: f!reader x Sex Bot Jungkook Word Count: 2k~ Warnings: Smut but that goes without saying for this fic p.s. I put out a mini drabble as well right before this in case you didn't catch it hehe p.p.s I have another temperature play drabble request so keep an eye out for that one in the future 🤭 Requested by an anon 💜

"What are these?" Jungkook asks when he walks into the living room where I'm sat down watching Hidden Love for the fifth time, holding up my little black box that I had hidden away and had completely forgotten about.

"NOTHING!" I say hurriedly, scrambling to get off the couch and tripping over the blanket I was using in the process. I regain my footing, run up to him and reach for the box but he holds it over my head, completely out of my reach.

"Are you cheating on me?" he teases, the objects in the box being ones I used before I got him. "You seriously think I would use those anymore? Now give it here!" I jump but once my fingers just barely touch it he grabs onto my hips to keep me from trying again.

I glare, waiting for him to give them back and when all I'm given is a stupid smug smile I resort to threats. "Give that to me or I will turn you off and make you charge on the floor instead of in bed with me" his eyes widen, not expecting that and deciding to do as I say, handing me the box of various sex toys that could never truly satisfy me.

"Why do you have so many?" he asks, picking up one very elaborate and confusing looking one that I snatch out of his hand immediately and put back in the box, shoving it in the back of my closet.

"Because none of them did everything I wanted them to" I sigh and close the door in hopes to help change the subject. When I try to walk past him though he stops me by wrapping an arm around my waist and bringing me back to stand in front of him.

"I don't know why I asked since I know how needy my baby is" he says, his voice dropping a bit while he places kisses on my neck, knowing that'll help take the edge off.

"Why do you always have to go through my t-things?" I stutter, my resolve of trying to stay upset with him faltering. "Because I wanna know everything about you baby, and that includes all of your dirty little secrets" he says directly into my ear before sucking on the sensitive skin right below.

I shudder at the thought of letting him in that much and I know I will eventually but his want to figure out as many ways as he can to please me on his own is way too fun to experience, no matter how embarrassing it might seem.

"You like that huh? The thought of me knowing everything about you, all your deepest darkest desires that you haven't even dared to say out loud. My baby likes to hide that away huh? Too afraid to even tell me what she wants sometimes. That's pretty selfish don't you think?" he says, his grip on my waist tightening when he pulls me closer, his sensors picking up on my arousal and in turn hardening his length for me to use as I see fit.

"Why don't you let me use some of those on you tonight hm? Or better yet, let me watch you use them to get yourself off. I bet you'd look adorable, so frustrated and begging for release but never quite getting exactly what you wanted" he says but I shake my head.

"Too cold, want you" his presence tonight being one that drove me into submission so easily. I can't help but become putty in his hands sometimes. He was made for me and knows exactly what I like so why not give into what his programing is telling him to do to me.

"Aw, too cold for you? Needed me to warm you up?" he says, his condescending way of talking to me one of the easiest ways to tip me into that submissive headspace, only with him though. With him things are different. With him I know I'm safe.

I nod my head and my lip juts out the slightest bit leaving him running his thumb along it before I decide to open my mouth and run my tongue across it. His robotic pupils dilate as if they were human and the next second I'm on my back on my bed, him hovering over me with that sexy smug look on his face.

"Does my pretty baby want something?" he asks, caressing my cheek with a featherlight touch, and I blink up at him, still reeling from his sudden actions. He hums as a way to get my attention on him again, wanting me to answer his question.

"Want you" I say, hoping he'll accept my simple answer but I know he won't settle for that. "You've gotta be a little more specific love" he teases making me huff. "Oh come on, be a good girl for me and tell me what you want hm?" he mumbles and peppers kisses all along my neck and collarbone, having worn just a tank top and shorts today.

His hands heat up and run along my skin, warming me up just like he said he would but suddenly his hands turn ice cold, making me push him away but as always he doesn't budge at all.

"What the matter love?" he taunts, his hands quickly going back to a normal temperature. "Don't do that" I scowl, not liking the sudden change. "Lemme play around a bit yeah? Wanna try something" he says, clearly ignoring my scolding.

I squint my eyes at him when he looks down at me, a stupidly tempting look on his face. "Just trust me" he says, leaning down to mumble it against my lips, just barely kissing me before pulling back and looking at me again for confirmation.

After thinking for a couple more seconds I nod my head and he tongues his cheek, a habit that he picked up from who knows where but something that's become so sexy to me and he knows it.

He helps me strip out of my clothes and lets out a groan in approval, running his fingers through my folds.

"Baby is so wet for me already and I've barely done anything. How adorable. Been waiting all day for me to touch you huh?" he says, watching as my mouth falls open when he applies pressure on my clit just how I like it, tracing circles around it and alternating with just barely dipping a finger into my entrance, never giving me what I really want, playing with me just like he said he would.

When his fingers start to touch me with more precision, one finger pumping inside of me while his thumb circles my clit I feel that same chill run though my body and I realize his hands have gone cold inside me making me yelp and back away from him but he growls and uses his other hand to grip my hip pinning me down on the bed to keep me from moving.

"Stay still for me love, promise it'll feel good" he says and I decide to trust him. He knows what my body wants and what it can handle, the signs to look out for to know what's going on in my head.

"So good for me" he says, kissing me and starting to pump his fingers in and out of me again, adding a second one right away but switching the temperature back to a warmer one to help with the stretch.

Once he starts to feel that I've gotten used to the intrusion he changes the temperature just cold enough so I can feel it, my back arching as the only way I can move about since he's still got my hips pinned against the mattress.

"Shh I know I know. You can take it though, it's just a little cold love" he coaches, his cold fingers dragging along my warm walls making me wince. "This is w-why I stopped using them, t-too cold" I admit although I already had before, hoping that in some way that would make him stop but he doesn't.

"You know I'll take care of you though" he says, the temperature of his fingers changing back to normal now, giving me a bit of a breather but soon he's pulling them out of me making me wince for another reason.

"Where are you going?" I whine but he only laughs and gets off the bed to take off his clothes before crawling back on top of me. "My baby is so impatient, aren't you?" he chuckles, settling between my legs and dragging his tip along my folds, his brows furrowed in concentration while collecting my slick and rubbing it all over his cock.

"Just put it in already, please" I basically cry out, the temperature play leaving me incredible sensitive and he knows it, not letting up with this sick form of torture. He places his tip against my entrance, not pushing in and just teasing my hole and when I open my mouth to protest he shoves himself into me, knocking the wind out of me, his response a hum, clearly satisfied with the results of his actions.

"Couldn't even wait for me to fuck you like I wanted to, needed my cock in you so bad that you couldn't even shut up and wait. Thought you wanted to be good for me tonight" he grunts, slamming into me at a relentless pace, his robotic strength being unparalleled in bed. I sob, the intensity and the need to catch my breath overwhelming me in the best way possible but when he chances the temperature of his dick I'm screaming for him to change it back.

"Stop running" he growls, grabbing my hips and sitting back on his heels so he can fuck me onto him, pushing and pulling my hips so fast making my breasts bounce up and down. "Fuck play with your tits. Wanna ruin you but my baby can lend me a hand or two can't she?" he says, talking down to me like I'm fucking stupid when I clearly am, cock drunk and barely able to see straight.

I slowly bring my hands up my torso, ghosting my fingers along my breasts, "S-shit" he stutters, his programing really playing the part and making me moan at his reaction. "Play with your nipples baby, get them nice and hard for me" he says, his hands dragging my hips back and forth making his length disappear inside of me over and over, never ceasing making my cock drunk mind go blurry, my reaction speed severely diminished.

He decides to give me a breather, stopping his movements and putting his fingers in my mouth, my lips closing around them right away. "Make a mess baby" he say, encouraging me to get them as wet as possible, my tongue swirling around them, a pool of saliva now gathered and making a complete mess, exactly how he wanted.

He takes them out of my mouth and my brows furrow, not wanting to stop since the approving gaze he gave me while I did it being something I didn't want to give up just yet. He chuckles and rubs his fingers together, making sure his thumb, pointer and middle finger are covered before using them to play with my nipple making me whine at the harsh pressure.

"Shh it's okay, I got you" he coaches, the cold temperature making my nipples harden painfully, goosebumps now present all over my body.

"My baby gets so cold so easily. Want me to warm you up again?" he taunts and I nod my head, the rate of his thrusts though making it difficult to decipher but he knows and so he switches to a warmer temperature making me sigh in delight. It quickly goes from too cold to way too warm making me moan in delight, the scorching temperature being painfully pleasurable.

"Don't worry baby, it's not gonna leave a mark, I wouldn't hurt my pretty girl. Unless she wanted me to" he says, the offer enticing enough to make me think twice but I shake my head 'no' and he takes it.

"Baby doesn't wanna be branded? That's okay, I'll take good care of you" he coos and that he does.

Over and over and over.

Drabble Masterlist

Taglist: @jkslipppiercing @trina864 @kaitieskidmore97 @goddesofimortality @coolbluedude @coralmusicblaze @whoa-jo @00frenchfries00 @pastelpinkjoon @joonwater Rest of the tags are in the comments 💜

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sweetestberryofthebunch · 27 days ago

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Give You My Heart (Detective!Agnes x f!Reader)

For Agnes it‘s always been all work, no life. Balance isn’t even a word in her vocabulary. Growing frustrated with your fiancée, you show up at the precinct and remind her what she’s missing out on.

Content/Warnings: Fluff and Smut, Age Gap Relationship, Brief mention of Somnophilia, Oral, Oral fixation, Semi Public Sex, Degradation, Face Slapping, Hair pulling, Dom/Sub Dynamic, Hard Dom!Agnes, Slight Brat!Reader, mention of safe wording, spit play and choking again, mentions of boot licking

Tag List for Part II: @crazycatladycaceta @live-laugh-love-lupone @jazzyxqzl you guys are the reason I wanted to write more of this, I hope you enjoy!

Read the warnings for this one guys, please! I just want everyone to be aware of what‘s coming and no unpleasant surprises. Love ya!

If I ever write about these two’s actual wedding, I’ll treat them to a fully planned out wedding night scene and not just these little sprinkles of kink I throw at them right now. Which reminds me - do we think Agnes is a Flogger or a Paddle gal?

Spring had sprung earlier than usual this year. By the end of January, the snow had retreated, and now, just a few weeks later, the first fresh green started blooming out of the frost. Mornings were crisp and clear, afternoons sunny but cold. Like every year, you felt the clamping grip of winter fall off your shoulders. Your skin was clearer, your body felt lighter, less stale. Colour seeped back into the world, a much needed change for both you and especially your partner.

You knew for sure that winter was over when Agnes began to forego her pajamas, opting to sleep in nothing but her boxers, if at all, like she preferred.

She slipped into bed one night, as per usual home hours after you, way past any reasonable hour.

At first you gasped when you felt her bare arms drape around you from behind in the earliest hours of the morning. But then you felt her hands start to wander, and you let out a little sigh, leaning into her touch, her bare skin quickly warming up under the covers.

New Year's Eve had put an especially nasty case upon her, something about Gang activity and illegal explosives, and the entire precinct had been working overtime since.

Agnes arrived at the Police Station before sunrise and left way past sundown, with a new stack of files to read before eventually finally passing out. The lunchboxes you packed her returned half empty at best, and when Agnes returned late at night from work, she barely had the energy, let alone the mood to talk.

In fact, the most you‘d seen of your fiancée this year so far was her half empty coffee mug in the morning, left abandoned on the kitchen table when she had to rush to work; And her silhouette in the dark when she slipped into bed beside you way past midnight. Most days, you were lucky to even get a greeting.

So, when she slipped under the covers, bare skin against yours, and you were still awake, you felt your body ache for her immediately. It wasn’t fair that work occupied her this much anyway.

„Agnes“, you whispered as her fingertips traced over your ribs. You could feel her grunt something unintelligible into your neck, lips teasing at the fine baby hairs there. Pushing your butt back into her, a low moan hurried past your lips. It had been a while … since early December, to be exact.

„Relax baby“, Agnes husked into your ear, voice drowsy, „Just let me…“

Her hand stilled on your lower tummy, just above the waistband of your pajama pants.

At first, you stayed completely still beneath her touch, even holding your breath in anticipation. Agnes didn’t tease you often, preferring to fuck you stupid fast and hard, but sometimes she did like to test your patience. Or rather, her own.

Minutes passed without her hand moving an inch. Her breath against your neck was slow, and even. This was not like her at all.

And then, you heard it. A low, quiet little snore, right into your neck.

You let out a sigh, head sinking a little deeper into the pillow. She had fallen asleep on you, right in the middle of this.

When you turned around, careful not to wake her, you were met with her pale face. She hadn’t even opened her ponytail before slipping into bed. Even in her sleep, her brow was creased in worry, her resting face at this point. Your fingers traced over her forehead, brushing a few loose strands out of her face. The touch was featherlight so as to not wake her.

“Oh Agnes.“ you shook your head, arm wrapping around her shoulders to pull her limp body close, cradling her head to your chest.

Gently, you leaned forward to press a kiss right onto the crown of her head. The crease on her forehead evened out a little, so you kissed her two more times, for good measure.

Tomorrow, you were going to make her relax, and if you had to drag her home by her hair, then so be it.

The day started beautifully. Clear, blue sky, crisp fresh air. Despite how close to her you‘d fallen asleep, when you stirred, the space beside you was already empty, the cold morning light illuminating the crumpled up blankets.

You went about your morning routine as per usual, however, as you stepped into the kitchen, drying your freshly washed hair with a towel, you found Agnes‘ coffee mug already cleaned up and drying on the dishrag.

She also had emptied both the last jar of peanut butter and the homemade strawberry jam Mrs Davis had gifted you for Christmas. You rolled your eyes. For someone so grumpy every time she had to see the neighbours, Agnes certainly enjoyed their gifts.

After work, you usually ran your errands and went home to feed the bunny. However, today you had fed Scratchy early, and stayed downtown. The walk to the police station wasn’t far, so as the sun went down, you trailed through the little downtown area, past shops that were slowly closing up for the day. You only stopped once at the little flower shop just at the corner to townsquare, where you spotted a beautiful, full bouquet of white and purple tulips, the first ones of the season.

When the two of you had started dating, you‘d made a point of always buying Agnes flowers, noticing the way she’d smile to herself despite trying to play it cool. A year later, when you‘d moved into her place, you had found that every bouquet she‘d ever received from you had been carefully dried, now lining up the wall of her home office. You had cried, and Agnes had made a point of fucking you on her desk that night, forcing you to look up at the wall as she‘d whispered her favourite memory about each date you‘d had into your ear.

As the police station came into view, you swallowed, gripping the fresh tulips tighter. Time to remind her what she was missing out on.

The parking lot was empty except for Agnes' car. Even the chief's VW was gone already, leaving Agnes to lock up by herself once again. Usually, you‘d be annoyed by that, but today, that was exactly what you‘d anticipated.

Your steps echoed through the precinct. The overhead lights were off, leaving the place tainted in early nights grey and the very last orange glow of sundown. There was only one light on, of course, Agnes desk lamp in her personal cubicle, hidden away only by a shabby glass front.

Your fiancée was crouched over her desk, propped up on her elbow as her other hand held a pen, tracing over whatever notes she had of the day. She didn’t look up as you approached, not even as her door creaked open, and you slipped inside.

There was a plastic pitcher on top of a metal cabinet right beside you, and you put the flowers inside without hesitation.

Agnes would notice in a week or so that her pitcher was in use as a makeshift vase, and you’d scold her about her water intake then.

Right now, you just stepped further into her office, stepping around her desk as you cleared your throat.

“You know”, at the sound of your voice, Agnes' head shot up in surprise.

„I‘m starting to think about getting into the illegal trade of explosives on the black market“, you drawled, standing right in front of her chair, hip leaning against her crappy desk. Pointedly, you raised the hand adorned with your engagement ring, fingertips drumming against your cheek, „Since that’s the only way to see my Partner these days.“

Blue eyes watch you closely, before Agnes leaned back in her chair, letting out a deep grown. „Don’t joke about that.“

God, she looked spent. „This case has been kicking my ass.“

You pushed yourself off the desk, kicking her chair away from the surface, turning her seat until she was facing you head on.

Tired eyes watched you, and the way Agnes‘ glance dragged down your body, following each every single movement. Without hesitation, you grabbed the armrests of her chair. She didn’t stop you, now caged in her seat as you leaned over her, your arms on either side of her.

You tilted your head to the side, putting on our strict no-discussion voice.

„Not as bad as I‘m gonna kick your ass if you don’t come home with me right now.“

To your surprise, Agnes' eyes darkened, pupils wide. She shifted around in her seat, throat bobbing as she swallowed. Oh.

„Baby“, Agnes' voice was hoarse and you had to hold back a self satisfied little grin.

Your lips were only a few inches away from hers, and you could smell her breath. She definitely did not have the baby carrots and hummus you’d packed her for lunch. There were hinds of chocolate and cheap black coffee. When your lips met hers, it was barely a kiss. Instead, your tongue darted out immediately, pushing past her chapped lips as you licked inside her mouth. Definitely chocolate.

You pulled back, your head tilted to the side. If you looked down, you could see right down her grey flannel into her cleavage, where only the soft cotton of her white undershirt kept her skin from yours. One of your hands let go of the chair, instead pulling down her collar. Your head dove down, and you pressed a single, lingering kiss to her chest, right between her breasts. Her skin was soft and pliant beneath your lips, and you sucked it in, giggling into her chest as your teeth grazed over her.

Agnes' breath hitched loudly and you pulled away, letting her skin go with a wet pop. There was a clear red mark of your teeth around the little bruise you’d sucked into her skin. As you admired your handiwork, you noticed that she was shivering. Oh, she was starving.

„What?“, you cooed, leaning in a little closer. „Not here? Not at work?“

You chuckled as your back straightened, your breath ghosting over her face. You were enjoying this way too much.

„But Darling”, you craned your neck, whispering into her ear. “Where else am I supposed to have my way with you? It’s not like you’re anywhere fucking else lately.“

Agnes' eyes darkened. There she was, that dominating, darker side of her. The animal inside of her, the one that she had starved for far too long.

Her hand shot up, fingers grasping at your neck like a vice. You tried to gasp, but your airways were already clamped tight. When she spoke, Agnes' voice was dangerously low.

„That’s what this is? I work overtime for two weeks and you get so desperate you show up at my job to fuck?“ Her hand tightened around your throat.

You gave her a sheepish little smirk, glancing over to the shelf by her door. Your pulse was racing in her grip. When your lips parted slightly, you desperately sucked in a few shallow breaths. „I also brought you flowers.“

For a moment, Agnes just stared at you. Your eyes watching her face so closely, open wide and round. Your pupils wide and your chest heaving. The wild glimmer in your stare, not nervous about what might come next, but excited. She may be the one in control, but you had always been the instigator of most of your scenes. And Agnes loved every second of it. The way your breathing was completely at her mercy. Her eyes went dark, hard as she exposed her teeth in a single, low growl. She was met with your smile, deliriously grinning back at her as you swallowed, throat rolling against her grip.

Agnes lips crashed against yours. Your lips met hers head on, open mouthed and you kissed her back with ferocity. Tongues intertwined, Agnes pushed yours down with dominating precision, licking over your teeth. You moaned into her mouth, deeply and guttural, and her hand left your neck.

Sucking in a sharp breath, you pulled away just enough to take a look at her. Agnes' face was flushed, chest rising and falling. You dove back in, lips connecting to her jaw, trailing down her neck, right between her collarbones.

“Baby”, Agnes huffed, head rolling back against the chair. Her hands found your hair, digging in to keep you close.

“Keep going”, it was supposed to be an order, but with the way you felt her tremble under your lips, the way her legs parted so you could crouch down in front of her, you knew she was begging for you.

Your fingers found the ragged fabric of her shirt. With one strong pull, you tore it open, sending a small shower of buttons flying and then pouring out the ground. Agnes' mouth opened in protest, but you were faster.

The moment you had access to her, you leaned down, tongue darting out to lick a firm stroke over her right nipple. The sensitive bud pebbled against the thin fabric of her undershirt. Instead of scolding you, Agnes' head rolled back with a long moan. Your hands slid down her front, over her ribs, her stomach. All the way towards her jeans, tracing all her most sensitive spots as you went. At the same time, your mouth wandered to her other nipple, kissing it through the thin fabric, sucking it into your mouth.

Agnes flinched, fingers scratching over your scalp. “Lower.”

You sat back on your knees, settling down on the ground between her legs. Under different circumstances, you would have peeled her bare slowly, layer by layer. You would have crouched down on the floor, kissed the tip of her boots all the way up to her ankles, taken them off carefully before teasing your way up her leg.

But you were on the dirty floor of her office, and these weren’t shoes you wanted anywhere near your mouth, and if you had really bad luck, Agnes’ chief could walk in any moment. You had to be quick.

So, as you made quick work of the fly of her jeans, you indulged in a few kisses on her lower stomach, on the thin line of skin where her white shirt had ridden up. Then, your fingers hooked underneath both waistbands, her jeans and her boxers.

One glance up, and you were met with a low chuckle. Agnes was watching your every move, her eyes black with desire, jaw tense.

“Can you..?”, you asked, giving her pants a little tug. Her hips rose up, and you took the opportunity to pull both pants down abruptly in one go. The fabric gathered around her ankles, and you shuffled forward on your knees, until you were comfortably settled between her knees.

One of Agnes' hands rested firmly on the top of your head, urging you closer. Even from where you sat, you could smell sweat, musk and need. The scent of sex. The scent of your future wife.

There was no time to waste, no build up, no teasing. You pressed one kiss to the hair curling above her center, inhaling the scent there. The hand on your head flattened, pulling you closer.

“No Games baby.”

You batted your eyes, glancing up at her without pulling away. Her face was stern, brows raised, eyes fluttered shut. One more kiss above her core, and then you finally leaned down to where she was aching for you.

Your nose brushed through her folds, opening her up like a flower. You could feel her shudder above you, and it made you smile instantly. Barely touched her, and she was already getting worked up. Lips still curled upwards, you craned your neck to press a teasing kiss against her soaked core, thick, liquid desire spilling out of her, coating your lips.

„Baby“, Agnes groaned, and you felt her hips buck against your face impatiently, „Don’t be a fucking tease.“

Fingers curled into your hair, pushing your pursed lips further into her open cunt. You couldn’t help but let out a little giggle at her urgency. The vibrations of the sound made her let out a strangled gasp.

You darted the tip of your tongue out, dragging over her most exposed, sensitive parts, slowly teasing its way right up her center to her clit. The little bundle of nerves was already swollen, exposed to you, pulsating under your tongue‘s quick, gentle flicks.

One glance up was enough to see her free hand gripping the arm rest, short nails digging into black hard plastic. Her other hand scratched at your scalp, keeping you exactly where she wanted you.

„Just like that baby“, she growled, blue eyes piercing into yours. „You just couldn’t wait to get home, huh?“

Her tone grew harsh, that rough, teasing lilt she always used when she talked down to you. A shudder ran up your spine, and your lips closed around her swollen clit, sucking the bud in. Agnes gasped, hand in your hair curling into a fist.

„You know Chief could walk in any moment, he tends to stop by to send me home after hours.”

Much to her dismay, your mouth retreated. You sat back on your heels, staring up at her in complete silence. Your face was drenched in her fluids, a single string of spit still connected your lips to her cunt, before it quickly sank into the chair’s fabric cushion, leaving a dark spot. The way Agnes' eyes darkened at the sight didn’t go by you unnoticed.

“Maybe”, you glared up at her in accusation, “You should actually listen to what your boss tells you some time.” You licked your lips, tasting her. “And I would also like to have you home more.”

The slap came so sudden, you had no time to brace yourself for the impact. Before you knew it, the back of her hand made contact with your cheek, leaving a sharp sting behind. You let out a whimper, one hand grasping at the irritated skin. Wide, watery eyes stared up at her.

While you knew you were pushing limits by talking back, you hadn’t expected her to get this worked up this fast.

For a moment, you saw Agnes' hard front drop. The grip on your hair softened just the smallest bit and her eyes glanced from your lips to your cheek before settling on your eyes.

“Need to tap out?” There was a slight shake in her voice, palm cupping the back of your head. You shook your head immediately, never breaking eye contact.

“I’m golden”, you whispered, rubbing your cheek against her bare thigh, feeling her relax into the contact.

The tip of your nose was tickled by the dark hairs curling in the crook of her thigh and core, and you gave her a dazzling smile. You felt the goosebumps rise on her milky thigh, smiling before pressing a single, gentle kiss to the sensitive skin.

Agnes sucked in a sharp breath, hand gently running through your hair one more time before her eyes darkened again, that firm, cold front slipping back into place.

“Good”, she drawled, hand wrapping around your throat. Her fingers curled, nails digging into your skin, leaving crescent moon markings in their place.

She pulled you up by your neck, meeting you halfway as she leaned down in her seat. Her breath was hot against your face.

When she leaned forward, it wasn’t to kiss you. Instead, her tongue darted out, licking a single, long stripe from your chin, over your slightly parted lips up to the tip of your nose, gathering the mix of sweat and her own desire from you. With the slight pressure on your throat, you didn’t dare try to kiss her, just held still as she tasted herself from you, watching the way her gaze darkened as it fixed on your face, nothing but desire written all over it. The desire to please her, taste her. Desire for more.

Agnes let go of your throat, pushing you back down to the floor. “Get back to it”, she ordered, jaw tight as she licked her lips. “You already wasted enough of my time.”

This time, you didn’t allow yourself to tease her anymore.

Instead, when your lips met her absolutely drenched, pulsating core, you poured every ounce of desperation into it. The deep, overwhelming love for the woman above you that ran through your veins like the very blood keeping you alive, the need to please her the way you lost yourself whenever she took control, and it felt like flying above the clouds.

Your lips closed around her clit and you could feel her racing pulse on your tongue. Sucking her drenched skin into your mouth, your tongue flicked right over it , fast, hard, unrelenting.

One of her thighs swung over your shoulder, and you felt the heel of her steel toed boots dig into your spine. The sudden pain pulled a moan from your lips, and you felt Agnes shudder at the sensation.

“J… just like that“, her groan was strangled, voice pitching higher in that special way it only did when she lost control of herself.

Her heel pressed into your back harder, and you moaned again, this time longer, deeper, pressing your nose and chin into her cunt.

Agnes yelped, and the rare sound was music to your ears. Her hips stuttered up into your face, the hand in your hair curling into a fist as she pushed your face closer.

It was hard to breathe in this position, but that just meant you wrapped your arm around the leg on your shoulder, pulling her even closer.

Agnes' right hand that wasn’t buried in your hair found yours resting on her thigh, and your fingers intertwined. A small smile formed on your lips, just for a second, and you pressed one more kiss right to her clit.

The strokes of your tongue became longer, tongue flat as you ran through her folds from her entrance to her clit. Wet, quenching sounds filled the dim office, mixing with the low grunts coming from the woman above you, in tune with the pace of your tongue.

„Baby“, Agnes breathed, and her hand in your hair tugged you towards her aching clit again, „Baby I‘m so close. Please!“

That was all you needed to hear. Your nose buried in the hairs curling just above her cunt and your neck strained as you leaned in further. It was the type of position your chiropractor probably lost his mind over, but that didn’t matter when you had Agnes O‘Connor begging for her release above you.

Your lips wrapped around her clit, sucking the bundle of nerves in. Her legs twitched, the heel on your back kicking up before pushing back into you even harder. If it wasn’t for the laws of physics, you’d be melting into her by this point. You certainly tried to, science be damned.

Your tongue flicked over her most sensitive bundle of nerves in rapid succession, face buried in her cunt from your nose to the tip of your chin. You could feel a single drop of thick liquid desire run down your neck, and the sensation made you moan into her.

Agnes sucked in a sharp breath, her short nails scratching over your scalp. „Yes!“, she pressed out through gritted teeth, a strangled and broken moan somewhere above you.

You couldn’t breathe like this, there was a growing strain in your neck and you‘d certainly wake up with bruises on your back and your knees tomorrow. But none of that mattered right now. Not when Agnes was growing frantic, when her body was twitching and spasming at the hot, wet pleasure of your mouth. Nails dug into your skin, scratching the surface open. Another small mark you‘d carry around for days to come. Your tongue pushed against her further, and you let out one final strangled whimper, the sound muffled by her cunt on your face.

Still, it did the job. Agnes let out a sharp hiss, every muscle in her body tensing up, pulling you in tighter, impossibly closer. Your tongue worked against her relentlessly, pushing her over the edge of her orgasm and right through it. You didn’t stop despite starting to flinch from lack of air, not until Agnes had ridden out the wave that had washed over her, until her heel slid off your shoulder, legs shaking as her body sank into the washed out cushion of her chair, finally relaxing.

And even then, you only let up slowly, tongue working relentlessly as you licked up the mess between her legs, kissing over her bush, her exposed clit, her drenched folds. Only when you were satisfied with your work did you pull away. Your face was absolutely ruined, slick from your nose to your chin, on your cheeks and jaw. The single drop that had dripped down your neck had caught the collar of your shirt, leaving a wet stain.

You truly were lucky there was no one at the precinct anymore, because there was no denying in what had just happened.

When you finally pulled away enough to look up at her again, there was an exhausted but satisfied smile on your face. You took a deep breath, lungs practically screaming for air that finally, you granted them again.

„You really needed that“, you commented, watching Agnes chest rise and fall in deep, slow breaths.

„Yeah.“ Agnes' head rolled back against the rest of her chair, her eyes fluttered shut for a moment. „I really needed that.“

Your face nuzzled against her thigh, leaning into her hot skin. There was a thin layer of sweat coating her, but you didn't mind, pressing a few lazy kisses along her leg as you caught your breath. Her hand stayed lazily draped over your head, fingers absentmindedly playing with your hair as she just let the exhaustion finally wash over her. It was only now that she truly let herself take a moment just to breathe.

After a short moment to recollect herself, Agnes finally began to close up the Station. Comfortable silence settled between you two as she did, one of her arms loosely wrapped around your waist, pulling you along as she checked if all doors were locked and lights turned off. She’d pulled her pants back up but hadn’t bothered with the belt that now hung open around her hips, and there were no buttons left to close her shirt again, so she just wore it open, white undershirt on display; which included the wet stains your mouth had left over her nipples.

You wiped your mouth with your sleeve, grinning into the fabric. „We have to stop fucking in unconventional places.“

„Why?“ Agnes' nose nuzzled into your neck. Her hand on your back slipped downwards into the pocket of your jeans. „It seems like you’re having fun.“

The dramatic pout you gave her made her laugh.

“I didn’t put down money for a king sized bed to fall asleep alone every night.“

To be fair, it was hard to make an argument for your bed right now. Still, your point stood firm and the look you gave her made it clear that you wouldn’t let her argue.

Agnes shook her head with a chuckle.

„Okay“, she held her free hand up in surrender. Her other arm pulled you closer into her side. „Next time we‘ll make use of our bed again.“

Agnes fumbled with her keys, thumb running over the rough fabric of your jeans as she locked up the precinct behind you.

You waited for her to finish, before hooking two fingers under her chin, forcing her to look up at you.

„Which means“, you said, and your tone left no room for discussions, „You‘ll have to come home before 8 pm. I am okay with eating dinner separately, but from now on I want you home at a reasonable time for bed.“

Agnes' brows rose up. „That’s what this entire thing was about?“

Your fingers wandered to rest against her cheekbone, turning her face to look directly at you. Her skin was rough beneath your touch. You wanted to comment how she wasn’t using the moisturiser you’d gotten her, but when Agnes leaned into your touch, there was no bite left in you. Not when she looked at you like that.

„You just want me home for bed?“

Your thumb ran over her bottom lip, traces of your own chapstick sticking to your finger.

„If I had it my way you‘d be home for dinner every night“, your voice was soft, but you stared at her intently. „We do the dishes together and catch the tail end of whatever game is on. If you manage not to talk about work all evening, we fuck on the couch. We go to bed because you’re tired, not because you’re so spent you might pass out.“

Her eyes darkened, and you felt her fingers dig into the flesh of your ass a little tighter. Agnes surged forward, but your hand on her cheek quickly held her back, mere inches from your lips. When she huffed in frustration you couldn’t help but grin.

„On weekends, which you will take off, we look at wedding venues. We‘re already behind on planning. I will show you every combination of flowers imaginable and you will give me your honest opinion on all of them. Also,“ you raised your chin, „You‘ll ask Agent Vidal where she gets her suits tailored. I love you, but I‘m not marrying you in a flannel.“

„Baby“, Agnes whined, a sound you rarely got to hear from her. You grinned, feeling her breath on your face.

„Promise“, you whispered, forehead resting against hers, „Promise me you‘ll take care of yourself better. And then we can fuck however and whereever you want.“

This time, when she leaned in, you didn’t stop her. Agnes' kiss was urgent, feverish. But when your eyes met hers, all you saw was love, her undying adoration for you. Your palm cupped her face.

„I promise“, she whispered so close to you, you felt the words more than you heard them. „I’m sorry about the last few weeks. You know how I get.“

You kissed her lips again. And then each corner of her mouth. And,before she could stop you, the tip of her nose. „I do. That’s why I came today.“

Her hand clasped firmly around yours as you finally made your way across the abandoned parking lot.

„You know, I always thought the interrogation room would be hot.“

You rolled your eyes. Of course she would think that. „Absolutely not, there’s a giant window!“

„Exactly. And handcuffs attached to the table.“

You felt the blood rush to your head. „Agnes!“

#agatha harkness #agatha harkness x reader #berry writes things #agnes o'connor #agnes of westview #Agnes x reader #agatha harkness x fem!reader #agatha harkness x female reader #Agnes O’Connor x reader #agatha all along #wandavision

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luvkyu · 5 months ago

Text

babygirl ( kim mingyu ) part two

synopsis : it's been a while since you and mingyu made it official. now, he's eager to take a new step with you.

content : 4.8k words, male reader, fluff/smut 18+!!, baby/babe petnames, power bottom reader, first time together, handjob (gyu doesn't last long lmao), oral, face fucking, lots of praise, consent checks, fingering, a little chest play, anal, mating press, aftercare, written w/o the use of condoms but safe sex is implied at the beginning

note : alright, i only went through this once to edit it so sorry if i missed anything. but anyways i basically always post fluff so enjoy the smut!! idk when it'll happen again!!!!

minors go away pls,, im serious lmao

part one

mingyu stared at you from across the table. his cheek was propped up against his hand and his back was slouched. he watched your eyes in fascination. they were locked on your laptop screen, darting here and there while your hands typed away. your eyebrows kept furrowing again and again, which mingyu found amusing to watch.

the two of you had taken things pretty slowly with your new relationship. being friends first, it took some time to get used to things and relearn how you fit together. if you were honest, you couldn't believe you hadn't seen mingyu's feelings for you sooner. his continued patience and understanding made you realize just how invested he was in you.

"i gotta get going soon. i have a lecture to get to," you finally broke the peaceful silence.

mingyu nodded, hiding the small frown on his lips. he knew you'd have to go eventually.

"okay, that's fine," he replied. "could i come over tonight?"

you finally looked up from your computer to see mingyu gazing at you with hope flickering in his eyes.

"sure, yeah. i didn't have any plans so that sounds great. we can watch a movie or play games or something if you want."

mingyu nodded and looked down at his hands.

"..well, i meant could i stay the night?" he clarified. you watched him play with his fingers, a shy smile on his lips. you quietly laughed to yourself. he was too cute.

"are you asking me if we can have sex tonight?"

mingyu's eyes went wide. he looked around to make sure no one in the coffee shop heard you.

"don't say it so carelessly!"

you chuckled again, "you're the one who brought it up!"

"yeah, but i was trying to be subtle," he whispered as he tried to hide his own laughter.

"mingyu, we've literally already talked about sex. and we already went to the doctor together."

"well, yeah, but it hasn't happened yet.. we only talked about being safe and.. about what we like," he said bashfully, "and i didn't wanna make you uncomfortable if it's not the right time yet."

you looked back at your computer, blushing.

"..why are you so sweet?" you muttered. mingyu's smile grew as he watched the pink tint on your cheeks darken.

"i really don't mind waiting. i just wanted to ask y-"

"babe," you stopped him. "i'll see you at my place tonight."

you didn't think you'd ever seen mingyu smile so big. his pretty canines showed before he looked down at his hands again.

you started to pack your things and stand up with your bag over your shoulder. you leaned over him and gave him a quick kiss.

"text me whatever time works for you?" he asked as you began to part from him.

"i will. see you later, gyu."

an eager smile curved on mingyu's lips as he walked to your front door. he could feel his steps speeding up involuntarily, excited by just the thought of seeing you.

he knocked a couple times on your door, but it remained closed, and he couldn't hear any movement from inside either. he double checked the time. it was around eight o'clock - the time you had agreed on in your texts.

confused and a little worried even, mingyu let himself into your place instead of waiting. he figured it would be unlocked - you were terrible at remembering to lock it.

"y/n?" mingyu called softly. still nothing. he frowned and walked further in search of you.

"y/nnnn.." mingyu stopped when he got to your bedroom. your room was dark, but still lowly lit with a few candles you had placed around. he smiled when he finally saw you curled up on your bed, sleeping in the hoodie that he left last time.

"dummy. why didn't you get under the covers," mingyu mumbled. he was about to get a spare blanket, but stopped when you started to stir and your eyes opened drowsily.

"oh, hi baby," you greeted quietly upon seeing him. mingyu grinned at you, moving to sit on the other side of the bed. "sorry, i drifted off after i took a shower earlier," you explained.

mingyu just shook his head at the apology. he got settled beside you, sitting and just staring at you with a smitten smile. he looked at the hoodie that draped over your shoulders and torso, then the thin shorts that laid underneath.

"looks good on you," he complimented as he tugged on the bottom of the hoodie. his hand slowly let go and trailed down to your thigh instead, mesmerized by you.

he watched you then stand up to stretch a bit after your accidental nap. you stretched your arms up and stood on your tip-toes, letting out a quiet groan. mingyu couldn't look away. the hoodie lifted just over your lower stomach and your leg muscles flexed.

"god," mingyu muttered, "you drive me crazy.." he was sure his ears were completely red by now, and he could feel some heat begin to rush toward his crotch. he felt pathetically desperate.

"what?" you asked while letting your arms fall back to your sides. you were still a little out of it, sleepy and cloudy eyed. mingyu flopped down onto the pillows with a heavy sigh.

"i'm just.. really into you."

you smiled and got back on the bed, climbing onto mingyu's lap to straddle him. his head instantly jerked up as his eyes went wide.

"good thing i'm your boyfriend then, huh?" you teased, sifting your hands through his hair. mingyu could only nod and look up at you.

you could tell from the way his mouth drifted open just the slightest bit that he was dying for a kiss. the look in his eyes was growing more impatient by the second. you slowly leaned down, your torsos pressing against each other, and let your lips hover over his. you stayed in place for a minute to enjoy the view of your boyfriend underneath you. before your lips could touch at all, you sat back up straight on his lap. mingyu groaned helplessly.

"y/nnn.." he complained.

"hm?"

mingyu let out a huff of air and stared at the ceiling.

"what is it, baby?"

"..i don't know how much longer i can stay like this," he admitted. he continued to stare at the ceiling to avoid your eyes.

a small smirk formed on your face as you started moving your hips against his. you went slow, watching mingyu's face change in pleasure. his own hips lifted upwards just the tiniest bit in an embarrassing need for more. his hands shifted from your thighs to your backside, trying to urge you to move faster.

"better?" you asked.

"mm.." mingyu didn't know if he meant yes or no, he could barely form words in his head let alone out loud.

you looked down at his grey sweatpants and moved a little faster. seeing his erection fighting against the fabric of his pants made your mind foggy.

mingyu let out a quiet moan when your hands slid beneath his t-shirt and gently moved along his chest. your hands were a little cold, it made his stomach tense up and his mouth fall open a bit more. when your fingers barely missed his nipples, the faintest whimper escaped his lips. you smiled at the reaction.

"sorry, gyu. you're just really cute all worked up like this."

mingyu tried to ignore the blush creeping up on his cheeks again.

"..keep going, please."

you smiled at the breathy words you finally got out of him. your hips were moving faster with his now, grinding against each other at a matched speed. mingyu's gaze kept going to you, watching almost in awe. seeing the tent in your shorts was getting him all the more worked up.

your hands soon traveled back down his chest and waist before settling firmly on his clothed cock. mingyu felt his heart skip a beat, meeting your eyes again.

"can i?" you asked. mingyu instantly nodded, causing you to pull the waistband of his sweatpants and boxers down. you took his wet length in your hand and started stroking. he finally gave up and let his head completely fall back onto his pillow, mouth agape and letting all his softest sounds out. maybe he'd been waiting for this longer than he realized.

"just like that.." mingyu's voice was quiet. he shut his eyes as he breathed heavily and enjoyed the attention he was getting. before he knew it, he was thrusting into your hand, losing the embarrassment he'd felt earlier.

you could tell mingyu was close already. from the way his eyebrows furrowed, to the way his fingers curled tightly around the hemline of your shorts, to the way his dick twitched and throbbed as you kept pumping him faster. you found it cute how quickly he could get off when it was you handling him.

"almost there, baby?" you asked, watching some of his pre slide down your fingers.

"g-god, yes..!"

you worked your hand faster around him, bringing your other hand down to fondle his balls. you leaned over him again to finally give him the kiss he'd been wanting. your lips moved sloppily, both of you still focused on the handjob you were giving.

you then pulled away from his mouth and looked down at him with a drunken smile.

"gonna be a good boy and cum for me?"

it was over for mingyu the second he heard those words leave your mouth. he wasn't even able to utter some kind of verbal answer. his back arched and he let out a loud moan as ropes of cum shot onto his stomach, some dribbling down your hands.

you watched mingyu's stomach rise and fall with his unsteady breathing. his groans died down with his high before your hand finally came to a stop. mingyu couldn't speak, he could only close his eyes and try to catch his breath. you smiled proudly while you unmounted his legs and watched the cum seep into his white t-shirt.

"sorry i should've taken your shirt off, gyu."

mingyu shook his head while sitting up. "it's just a shirt," he replied as he smiled and took your face in his hands, kissing you deeply.

"i can't stop smiling," he whispered, his beaming smile forcing him to stop kissing you. "still wanna keep going?"

you nodded and resumed kissing in what became a messy make-out. mingyu shakily began discarding his sweatpants and boxers, followed by his your hoodie. your hands traveled to his waist and under his shirt again before taking it off completely. he got chills as he felt you pull the shirt over his head, and then admire his tanned skin and perfect muscles.

"you're so pretty, baby," you complimented. you kneeled in between his legs as he sat on your bed. he looked up at you with blushing cheeks while your hands went through his wavy locks.

mingyu's hands caressed your legs, the two of you just gazing at each other in content. his hands ran up and down your thighs again before sneaking up your shorts. his brows twitched upwards in intrigue when he realized you weren't wearing anything underneath the thin piece of clothing.

"no underwear?"

you shook your head, "i figured it'd just slow us down."

mingyu laughed quietly at that response. you certainly weren't wrong. he slid your shorts down and finally laid eyes on your naked form. you continued to look down at him until noticing his longing stare at your half hard length.

"what is it, gyu?"

mingyu swallowed hard. he looked up at you with eyes you'd never seen from him.

"can i suck you?"

your dick immediately jumped at such a question. you mumbled some inaudible curse word and nodded, watching your boyfriend's attention go right back to your cock as he began to stroke you slowly.

you let out small sighs and moans as you watched him become entranced in what he was doing. before long, his mouth hovered over your cock as he looked up at you, as if asking for permission again.

"go ahead, baby."

mingyu smiled before taking you in his mouth. he didn't start slow either. he took as much of you down his throat as he could, tongue massaging your skin.

"fuck-!" you felt your body take a screenshot. your nails dug into the skin of his shoulders as you knelt in front of him.

you had never seen mingyu like this before. his attention was completely fixed on pleasing you. his eyelids looked heavy and he seemed to just keep moving his head faster. before you knew it, you could hear the wet sounds of his mouth and see some saliva slide down his chin.

"holy shit, mingyu," you moaned as your mouth fell agape. you could feel your hips start to snap forward, but you stopped yourself. you pushed mingyu's hair back, bringing him to look up at you again as he deep throated you.

"fuck, that's good.." your head fell back as you closed your eyes and let him work you. all his pretty, muffled moans paired with the lewd sounds of his mouth on your drenched cock would sooner than later be enough to break you.

mingyu pulled off of your dick after another second. his eyes drooped closed as he sat back and tried to breathe.

"you okay, baby?"

mingyu nodded, "just need a second."

"okay, take your time," you comforted.

you decided to take a rest as well. despite mingyu's otherworldly blowjob, your knees were starting to kill you from kneeling in the same spot. you moved to sit on the edge of your bed and propped yourself up with your hands. your cock still stood tall, glistening with mingyu's saliva.

after a minute, you felt mingyu's weight shift on the mattress. you turned to see him getting off of your bed and instead get in front of you on the floor. he gave you a mischievous smile and leveled himself with your crotch.

"babe," mingyu started, "you know you can fuck my face right?" he smiled again when your dick twitched at the question. he slowly started to take you in his mouth again, all while keeping intense eye contact with you.

"..are you sure?" you asked. mingyu nodded, taking you deeper.

"shit." you tangled your hands in his hair again and watched your cock disappear into his mouth. "just tap out if it becomes too much, okay?"

mingyu only moaned in response. he closed his eyes as you began to thrust into him. if you were honest, you were afraid of hurting him, but he seemed perfectly fine. excited even. you looked down at him with cloudy eyes and mouth fallen open yet again. the bed started to move and creak quietly as your thrusts quickened. you tightened your grip on his hair and let out a loud moan at the feeling of your cock hitting the back of his throat.

"fuck, you're taking me so well, gyu.." you were getting way too close, and you knew he could feel it. you pulled out of his mouth and let go of his hair while giving him a soft smile. mingyu didn't waste any time though. his hand instantly went to your leaking cock and started pumping you.

you fell back a bit onto the mattress, eyebrows knitting together and hips bucking up into his hand. you came with a loud groan and a yell of his name. you couldn't bother to worry about where your cum landed, you just let your boyfriend finish you off.

mingyu stood up with a proud smile and hovered over your laying body, giving you a short kiss. he then went off to your bathroom and came back with a wet rag to clean both of yourselves up.

"babe," you called softly. mingyu met your eyes as he wiped your body down.

"hm?"

"if i had known you could suck dick like that.."

mingyu chuckled. "what? you would've locked it in with me years ago?"

you laughed and nodded. mingyu couldn't help but blush. he stood in front of you and began wiping himself down from earlier. you watched him in intrigue. he was just so perfect. when he finally looked up and caught you staring, he instantly looked away with an embarrassed smile.

"stop looking at me," he mumbled. you could've sworn you heard a faint giggle leave his lips.

"okay, sorry babygirl," you responded sarcastically.

mingyu rolled his eyes at the nickname. he turned away from you completely to hide his flustered state.

"babe, you literally just let me fuck your face. but now you get all shy when all i'm doing is looking at you?"

mingyu finally turned back to give you a side eye. he huffed dramatically and set the rag down before joining you back on your bed, laying beside you.

"and it might be your first and last from me if you're not careful."

you laughed before pressing your lips into a thin line, showing him they were 'zipped'. mingyu nodded in approval.

"in all seriousness," you began again, "that really was amazing. i'm sorry it took us so long to do this kind of stuff. i just.. i like going slow."

mingyu shook his head, "don't apologize. i'd wait even longer for you. i want you to feel comfortable with me.. and safe with me."

you rolled over a little to face him better. your hand reached over to cup his cheek, thumb grazing over his skin. his eyes were locked on yours as his lips stretched into another idiotic smile.

"i've never known a man like you, gyu."

mingyu felt every part of him tingle. he leaned in to connect your lips again. your kisses started off slow and soft, as if pouring out every emotion you had for each other. but each kiss got more intense and sensual. he slowly climbed on top of you as your tongues met messily.

as he hovered over you, you realized he looked even bigger and broader this way. his arms flexed and his hair fell out of place, his pretty skin glistened with the finest layer of sweat, and his knee settling in between your legs was getting more and more dangerous.

mingyu stopped kissing you after realizing you were a little distracted. he continued to hover over you with concerned eyes.

"are you okay?"

"hm? yes! sorry.. was just, um.."

his hand came up to gently hold your cheek. "what is it?"

you smiled, "i was just admiring you."

"ah, i see," mingyu chuckled. "you were checking out how hot your boyfriend is, right?"

you rolled your eyes at him. although he was right on the money, he was still a dork. you wrapped your hand around the back of his neck and brought him back down to keep kissing you.

his lips started to travel down from your lips to your neck, his knee finally pushing up against your dick. your mouth fell open at the feeling. mingyu could've sworn he even heard the faintest whine manage to escape from you, and it just about drove him insane. he didn't bother to keep going slow, he chose a spot on your neck to suck and bite while his knee rubbed against your cock.

by the time you were fully hard again, your whimpers and heavy breaths were fueling mingyu's ego completely. he moved your legs to hook around his waist before crashing back into your lips as if he'd been starving for them. his hands caressed around your hips and down to your ass.

"you have lube right?" he asked with staggered breaths. you nodded and pointed to the drawer of your nightstand, to which he left the warmth of your leg lock to reach for.

you watched him pour the lube onto his fingers before bringing his hand down to your backside. he carefully began to spread the substance around before inserting a finger.

"is this still okay?" he asked softly. you couldn't stop the moan that left your lips. and if that didn't answer his question, you still nodded and managed to utter out a 'keep going' in between the sighs of pleasure.

mingyu's lips were on yours again before you knew it. his body felt warm and safe, and the constant, loving kisses as he took his time working you open added a level of intimacy that you didn't think you'd felt before.

you realized that your eyes had been closed for a while. you finally opened them to meet mingyu's gaze. he smiled at you, giving you another kiss. he had three fingers in you now, scissoring and thrusting as he soothingly rubbed the skin of your thigh with his free hand.

"i'm gonna keep stretching you. just let me know when you're good, baby," mingyu said again. you nodded while his lips traveled back down to your neck. you could see his dick hovering over your own. it made your stomach turn in excitement.

mingyu pulled his fingers away from your stretched hole, about to add more lube when you spoke up.

"..i'm good now, gyu."

mingyu looked at you, "are you sure? i can prep you more."

you only shook your head and gave him a dazed smile. you watched his composure straighten out as he grabbed the lube again to start coating his cock. a dumb, eager, smitten smile was stuck on his face again, but you still found it adorable. how someone so impossibly hot could also be so disgustingly cute was beyond you.

"you look so good like this, gyu," you complimented. you rested your arms over your head as you watched him stroke himself. he was getting all flustered again.

"are you seriously talking about me when i have you laying under me like this? all spread out and ready for my cock."

alright, he clocked you.

"..shit, don't talk like that, i might cum on the spot."

"noted." he kissed you one more time and lined himself up with your entrance. your legs naturally wrapped around him again before he began to enter you. his eyes instantly shut as he bit his lip in an effort to hold back his groans. he then took both of your hands and raised them above your head, tightly intertwining your fingers against the sheets.

he stopped to let you adjust before looking at you with glossy eyes. "still okay?"

you nodded quickly in response. squeezing his hands in yours, you lifted your head up to kiss him passionately. it was in that moment that it really hit you - mingyu may be your baby, but he was still a hunk who was realistically much stronger than you.

"keep going, baby," you told him. "you're doing so good for me."

a small moan left mingyu's lips as he let his hips snap forward a little too much. his forehead fell into the curve of your neck, his cock a little more than halfway into you now.

"..you feel so good," he whimpered into your skin.

your staggered breathing filled his ears as he tried to keep still, scared of hurting you if he pushed into you any further. you kept whispering praises to him as you let go of his hands and instead began to caress his arms and back.

"you can keep moving, gyu. i'm okay."

he didn't need to be told again. he looked down and watched as his cock disappeared all the way inside you. he smiled when he earned a guttural moan from you.

"..that's it, baby," you mumbled, voice a little weak.

mingyu finally began to steadily slide in and out of you. he littered kisses all along your neck and down to your chest by your collarbones.

"fuck, that's good, gyu.. faster."

you heard a grunt from him as he gripped the sheets and started to pound into you. the quick change from gentle to rough made your mouth fall agape for the nth time that night. your legs became weak, falling wider to the sides around mingyu.

you could feel the bed moving with him, his thrusts just getting harder and rougher. you let your head fall back as more moans spilled out. the veins in his arms were popping and his pecs bounced with every thrust. you let your hands wander to his chest, squeezing as you fell into a trance. he looked down at your hands and smirked.

"like my chest, baby?"

you could barely put a sentence together. you just nodded and kept touching him as he fucked you.

mingyu soon needed more of you. he paused to move your legs, bending them up against your body and hooking them over his shoulders. the stretch made you choke out a whimper as he resumed his thrusts.

"m-mingyu..!"

he smirked again as he watched your eyes roll to the back of your head. "what? you like when i fuck you silly like this?" he taunted between grunts.

you nodded frantically, muttering out 'yes's under your breath. your eyes were glassed over, mouth still hanging and hole clenching around him. the sounds of skin slapping and your bed beginning to creak again just drove mingyu to go harder.

"right there-!" you suddenly yelled out just as you saw stars. "right there, baby!"

both of your moans filled the bedroom, mingyu drilling into your prostate. you met his eyes - his gaze was intense. but you couldn't hold the contact for much longer. soon, your eyes rolled back up to just stare at the ceiling, fucked out.

"pretty boy.. can't even look at me. am i making you feel that good?"

his words sent chills down your body as you sputtered out more 'yes's and 'don't stop's. mingyu was quite proud of himself, to say the least. you were always the one teasing him and babying him. but now, here you were, a moaning mess underneath him.

he leaned down closer to you, making your legs burn from the stretch, then managed to take your throbbing cock in his hand.

"y/n- fuck.. i'm gonna cum soon," mingyu groaned out.

"mmh.. me too," your voice almost sounded broken from the pleasure. you held onto his shoulders, hands sliding over his back and leaving reddening scratch marks.

the sound of mingyu's moans got louder and heavier as he chased his high. he continued to fuck you into the sheets, but his hips began to stutter with how close he was getting.

he pulled out with a sly smirk and started jerking himself. your legs fell back down as his eyes locked onto yours.

"let's cum together, yeah?" he prompted.

your jaw hung open as he took your leaking cock in his hand and joined it against his own, stroking both of you at an increasingly fast pace. you couldn't decide where to keep your eyes - mingyu's lewd face or your cocks being pumped together.

mingyu's orgasm hit with the longest moan you'd heard from him yet. you started to finish with him, humping up into his hands as your mixed cum landed across your body and the sheets beneath you.

he kept stroking until your climaxes subsided, leaning down to kiss you softly before falling beside you on the bed. you closed your eyes and tried to steady your breathing while mingyu reached over to get the rag from earlier. he wiped you down once again, cleaning you the best he could.

"don't worry about it, babe. we can just go clean up in the shower," you stopped him. mingyu nodded and gave you another kiss on your cheek instead. you laughed quietly at the smile he couldn't wipe off his face.

"sorry," he laughed with you as he covered his mouth. "i keep smiling too much."

"no, i like when you smile. just confirms that you like me."

he scoffed and looked over at you. "as if we didn't know that already."

pulling you in toward his body, he wrapped his arms around you and kissed your head. your legs tangled together as you hugged him tightly. he let out a satisfied sigh while gently caressing your back, then looked down at you.

"shower now?"

"yes please." you left his embrace and got up from your bed. you started to trudge to the bathroom, but mingyu rushed up to follow behind you.

"wait, wait, wait," he squeaked out as he caught up to you. you stopped in the doorway of the bathroom to look at him in confusion.

"what is it?"

mingyu blushed. "nothing. just wanted to stay with you."

you shook your head at him, although he didn't miss the stupid grin that grew across your cheeks.

"you're such a baby, gyu."

he turned the water on before moving closer to you, hovering just over your lips.

"babygirl, right?" he asked.

you laughed and kissed him, "mhm."

#kpop x male reader #male reader #seventeen x male reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen fanfic #seventeen smut #seventeen #mingyu x male reader #mingyu x reader #mingyu smut #kim mingyu #mingyu #kpop x reader #kpop fanfic #kpop smut

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tiny-space-platypus · 8 months ago

Text

Never really fit back in

Part 2 Daniel or Danyal or Danny?

Danyal took a deep breath. There was only one person who could bring him to his brother. One person who could get him into the Wayne household. Vlad Masters, his godfather, though things were getting better with Vlad it was still awkward. He doubted he'd ever fully trust him but he was the only adult around who knew what he was and at least for right now wasn't trying to kill him for it. Plus he had access to the Wayne Galas and as his heir Danny did too.

"Daniel" Vlad smiled at him and offered him a seat at his table. "I was quite surprised when you asked to have a meeting with me" Danyal took a seat as dinner was served to them. He hesitated before speaking. Danny had been trying to prepare what to say to Vlad all day but now he was here, his mind went blank.

"I-" He paused as he pursed his lips before stealing his nerves once again. "I'd like to take up your offer of being your heir." Vlad stopped moving for a second as his smile faltered. he stared at Daniel. The silence was deafening. Danyal continued or well rambled after an uncomfortably long few minutes of silence. "The Fenton household hasn't felt safe in.. Well it's never been safe but ever since my accident it's just gotten worse. The house is always attacking me, even though my parents- Even though Maddie and Jack know I'm Phantom now that hasn't stopped them- actually I think they've just been ignoring me. And-"

"Daniel,"

"Since Jazz left for college, I've only really had Sam and Tucker but-"

"Daniel"

"They're now busy preparing for their own futures and all that-"

"Daniel!" Vlad spoke a little louder silencing Danny again then sighed. "I will gladly take you in, Daniel. It's the least I can do for you" Danyal relaxed a bit, though not too much. Vlad might be better now but he's still a power hungry fruitloop. Danny still had to be careful but at least Vlad's manor wasn't actively trying to destroy him. At least Vlad acknowledged his existence. And so Danny's new life began.

A few new changes happened after he started to live with Vlad. One he changed his legal name to Danyal (it just felt more real), he and Vlad still argue over changing his last name over to Masters but Danny's not ready for that. Danny had to start taking etiquette classes from both Dorothy and Vlad, Vlad had gotten him plenty of suits and other more comfortable clothes, and Danny had full access to his lab. Though Danny didn't go down there often, it gave him the creeps in a bad way. Most labs did at this point. Instead he had taken over a large room and had a work desk where he tinkered on what ever her felt like tinkering on, or schoolwork, or the loads of paper work he had to do for the Infinite Realms. It was kind of nice having Vlad help with that though at least someone could explain what half of it meant and wasn't as secretive as Clockwork.

Four months passed and things were going great actually. Things were finally starting to feel alright again, maybe this was the best decision. Eventually Danny did tell Vlad about being Damian's brother only because he would have to confront Damian at the Wayne Christmas gala.

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Damian just like his other siblings dreaded the galas but they were important. It was important to keep building relationships with the public and the rich. It was important to keep a mask on and play the very rich found family of Brucie Wayne. It was important to keep their night life out of the picture.

Damian got ready with his siblings as usual. He listened and complained with them about the Gala as Jason laughed and praised being "dead". At least being the youngest meant he wasn't as bothered by the guests as the rest of his siblings were. All he had to do was introduce himself to the guests, have his picture taken a thousand times and lurk around the party. A boring night that would be much better spent on patrol. Though he was just has confident that the others could Patrol Gotham without them as his father.

The gala was about normal, he greeted guests with his father as Tim went out to do some networking. Dick playing as his usual self, Cass lurking around, Steph tormenting people by being her eccentric self, and Duke wandering around and making small talk. The night was normal till Masters arrived.

By that point Damian had broken off from his father and went to see and spend time with his siblings. Though something felt off after about a half hour. Damian went to report this to his father only to find him still speaking with Masters who had a boy with him. He paid no mind to him. "Father there's-" Damian paused then looked at the boy standing next to Masters who was smiling at him.

Danyal. That was Danyal. That was Danyal. That was Danyal.

Damian just stared at Danny with a look of horror that his father caught quickly. Before Bruce could pull Damian away he heard his brother speak.

"Hello, Damian. It's nice to see you again"

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Bruce had never seen his son like that before. He had never seen that look on his son's face before. Something had to be wrong he just didn't know what yet. Bruce excused both himself and Damian from the Masters and brought Damian over to the others. He looked at his son who looked both terrified and shell shocked. Bruce spoke softly.

"Damian, are you alright chum?"

Damian started to hyperventilate and mumble in Arabic. Damian normally spoke in Arabic when upset but this was very clearly different. Bruce brought Damian to his room, not because he was in trouble but because he was freaking out and needed some quiet. That night for the first time Damian openly cried in front of Bruce. That night for the first time Damian held onto Bruce like his life depended on it and sobbed. That night for the first time Damian sobbed into his father.

Bruce didn't know what the Masters did to his son but they won't get away with it. That he swore. He'll have Tim and Barbara look into them later for now his son needs him.

#dc x dp #danny phantom #dcu #bruce wayne #damian wayne #demon twins au #vlad plasmius #redeemed-ish Vlad #he is still doing this to have a little more power in the realms but rn he's more helpful than not so whatever #good dad bruce wayne #protective dad Bruce Wayne #trying to portray Danny struggling with who he is by constantly switching up his name. hopefully that made sense or could be picked up on?#danny gave Damian a panic attack:)#danny probably also will have a panic attack after realizing he gae his brother a panic attack :)))#Never Really Fit Back In

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taurasiluvr · 9 months ago

Note

can u write a fic where paige and reader is on the phone and paige starts touching herself to readers voice? and then reader eventually notices and asks to facetime and yk… this is just a suggestion u don’t have to do it 😭

YES YES YES YES MA'AMMM

away games were the hardest on you and paige, you both thrived on being physically near each other and the separation always felt like an eternity. the long nights apart were filled with longing texts and video calls that could never quite bridge the gap. you missed the feel of her arms around you, the warmth of her body pressed against yours, and the way she made you feel safe and loved.

while you were incredibly proud of her, the distance was a constant reminder of how much you relied on her presence. you would watch her games on the screen, cheering her on from afar, but it never felt the same as being there in person.

tonight was one of those nights.

paige's team was playing an important match out of town, and you found yourself alone in your shared apartment. the space felt emptier without her, the silence almost oppressive. you tried to focus on other things, but your thoughts kept drifting back to her.

the game had just ended, and UConn had won. your phone buzzed with a call from her, and you eagerly answered, a smile spreading across your face at the sound of her voice.

"hey, baby," paige greeted, her voice warm and full of excitement. "we won!"

"i saw! you were amazing out there," you replied, feeling a rush of pride. "miss you so much, though."

"i miss you too," she said, her voice softening. "i hate being away from you."

there was a moment of silence, the connection between you palpable even through the phone. you could almost feel her presence, the memory of her touch lingering on your skin.

"tell me about your day, what'd you do without me?" paige asked, a breathless laugh coming from her lips.

you laid on the bed as you recounted your day. "nothing too crazy, just went to my classes then did some grocery shopping for us," you paused, trying to think of whatever else you'd done. "oh! well, i also did some online shopping, i splurged a new bikini."

"oh?" paige's breath hitched at the thought of that. "yeah, you deserve that, especially after midterms. can't wait to you see wearin' it, looking all pretty..."

paige trailed off and you could tell she was feeling the distance, maybe even more than you. you smiled at the thought and you couldn't help but tease her a little more.

"maybe i'll give you a little fashion show when you get back," you teased, your voice playful and sultry. "just for you."

paige let out a low groan, her breath hitching again. "you know what that does to me, baby. you're killing me here."

you giggled, enjoying the effect you had on her. "good, want you to think about it all night."

"god, i will," she murmured, her voice husky. "always know how to drive me crazy."

you bit your lip, feeling a surge of warmth at her words. "i miss you so much, paige. i wish you were here with me right now."

"miss you too," she replied, her voice softening. "more than anything. but hearing your voice makes me feel like i'm right there with you."

you could hear the sincerity in her voice, and it made your stomach ache with need. "tell me what you'd do if... if you were here," you whispered, your voice trembling with desire.

paige let out a slow, deep breath. "if i were there, i'd kiss you. slow and deep, just the way you like it. let my hands roam over your body, feeling every inch of you."

you closed your eyes, letting her words wash over you, imagining her touch.

"i'd kiss your neck, your shoulders," paige continued, her voice growing more intense. "i'd make my way down to your chest, kissing and sucking on your nipples until you're moaning my name."

a soft moan escaped your lips, your body reacting to her words. "paige," you whimpered, your voice barely above a whisper.

"i'd move lower, kissing your stomach, your hips," paige said, her voice thick with desire. "i'd spread your legs and taste you, licking you slowly, teasing you until you're begging for more."

you could feel the heat building between your legs, your hand slipping under your clothes to touch yourself. "fuck, p, that sounds amazing," you gasped, your fingers mimicking the sensations she was describing.

"i'd suck on your clit, making you moan my name," paige continued, her own breath growing ragged as you heard her shift on the other line. "slide my fingers inside you, feeling how wet and tight you are for me."

"yeah, just for you," you moaned, your body trembling with pleasure. "need you, p. need you so much."

"i'm right here, baby," she whispered, her voice filled with emotion as you heard her breaths coming in staggered. "i can feel you, hear you. fuck, don't cum, wanna cum together,"

"oh yes," you panted, your fingers moving faster.

"i'd fuck you with my fingers, curling them just right," paige groaned, her voice low. "keep sucking your clit, making you scream my name as you cum for me."

a few moments pass and you feel the pressure in your lower stomach tighten, and you bit your lip to try and hold off cumming until paige tells you to. you could hear her own breathless moans on the other line as you tried to focus.

"gonna cum, baby, oh fu-fuck," paige groaned out. "cum for me, fuck, cum for me," she rambled as she felt her own orgasm crash over her.

"o-oh, fuck, paige!" you cried out, your body shuddering as you reached the edge. "'m cumming, 'm cumming!"

you let out a loud moan as the orgasm washed over you, your body trembling with the intensity of it. paige's voice was there, guiding you through it, her words a soothing balm to your pleasure-wracked mind.

as the pleasure ebbed, you lay there, breathless and spent. paige's breathless voice came through the phone, soft. "i love you so much," she whispered.

"i love you too," you replied, your voice filled with emotion. "can't wait to have you back in my arms."

"soon, baby," paige promised. "soon."

if you enjoyed, any interaction is greatly appreciated!

with love, rylin 𝜗𝜚

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larcenywrites · 8 months ago

Note

Headcanons for collaring Logan and calling him "my little animal", please? 😏

I’ll tell you what, that “my little animal” line had me all kinds of fucked up in that theatre 😩 A bit of a preface for the fic 😏 So these are definitely more about what the collar does to him 😏 and I feel like they kinda just turned into sex hcs here and there? Though, I suppose I could supplement with another list of more generalized sex HCs in the future if it’s popular 😘 freaky but tbh the fic is gonna be freakier

Collaring/Sex Headcanons

Logan Howlett x F!Reader

🍺 His go-to collar is definitely something more rugged and simple. Something flexible, something that fits loosely— as you can imagine, he’s not at all a fan of the stiffer and tight-fitting collars :( he’s been collared before, after all, in a not-so-pleasurable way :(

🍺 But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t still like for his collar to be pulled on 😏

🍺 But to clarify, this isn’t really any sort of submissive play. Sure, there are subby elements involved, especially at first, but overall, think of this as more like a safe play, or maybe even an exercise.

🍺 Collaring him like an animal means it’s, well, time to be an animal. That it’s okay to be what he is 🤎 He spends a lot of time working to suppress and regulate the rage and urges and instincts, but sometimes doing so frustrates him more :(

🍺 And depending on the situation, he’s probably tried very hard to keep himself in check when he’s with you, more specifically.

🍺 But you love him for who he is! For what he is! So it doesn’t make it any better when he’s frustrated and pent-up for suppressing what he is 😔 and it only gets worse with age.

🍺 So on days like this, when he comes in all tense and moody (believe it or not, there’s a difference between I’m just pissed at Scott and I wanna rip bricks out of this wall with my teeth but that’s not socially acceptable), all it really takes is a downward tug of his hair to get him head down and on his knees 😘

🍺 He wants it too! He knows exactly where this is going! Again, think of it like an exercise. And where, for once, he can feel more safe and comfortable about it in a controlled environment 🥺

🍺 Buckle it around his neck and you won’t need to do much else for a few minutes— just keep a hand around that collar, pet his hair, and just let him growl it out 😮‍💨 eventually, he’ll lean forward and nuzzle against you.

🍺 He’s still being sweet for now, but don’t forget he’s still…

🍺 “There’s my little animal,” you coo now that he’s in the right space, tugging the collar to make him face up at you.

🍺 You don’t know if his mouth is open in a snarl or a moan, but your fingers are too busy tracing over his lips and teeth anyway 😏 And he’s too busy licking at your thumb pressing on the point of his fang and kissing your palm to care either.

🍺 Past this point, your little wild animal can be a little unpredictable!! But hey, doesn’t that just make it more exciting?

🍺 Logan is strong. Strong doesn’t even begin to cover it! He won’t crush you or anything, but as far as he knows, he has permission to be heavy-handed when it comes to gripping onto you! And making sure you can’t run from him 🥴 So don’t act shocked when you have bruises the next day!

________________________________________

🍺 (TW: BLOOD) and don’t act shocked when those fangs and maybe even claws draw a few pinpricks of blood. He’ll be eagerly licking over those wounds 🥴

________________________________________

🍺 He’s definitely bitey too. He gets excited licking your skin, okay?? He just has to nip and nibble and bite before licking over the pressure marks from his fangs 🥴🥴🥴

🍺 Will eventually start biting his way up your body… and licking overly wet stripes up your chest

🍺 With how hard he’s gripping your thighs while doing this, you’ll probably try to hold his hand or caress it… It’ll feel weird af, but you will be able to feel the way his claws excitedly flex beneath his skin. But be careful! They might poke out juuust a little bit 😉🤏

🍺 Will eventually eat you out while kneeling🧎🏻‍♂️and no matter how hard you tug on that collar, even if you’re choking him, he won’t stop until he’s satisfied 😏 definitely growling while doing it… also growling very possessively and biting your inner thigh when you try to pull him away 🥴

🍺 This mf would drag you up the bed by the neck if he could 😩 but he’ll settle for biting your neck and lifting you up to carry you to the top of the bed 😌

🍺 Sometimes he’ll get overstimulated and sink his fangs into the edge of the mattress or a pillow 😳 and you’ll definitely know when he’s about to do it because he’ll pull away and nearly look like he’s snarling in pain 🥵 and sometimes he looks like he’s about to sneeze 🤭

🍺 But at least he didn’t sink his fangs into you, right…? 😳

🍺 Drag him down by the collar for a kiss during sex, and he’ll meet you with fangs and tongue instead 😘

🍺 In fact, just tug the collar down anywhere while he’s fucking you. Your knuckles tense against his neck with your fist around the collar, holding him face down against the sheets… it will only make him rut into you harder with a low growl 😈

🍺 Holding him against your chest works too 😏 gives him something to mouth on 😘

🍺 He’s definitely cumming inside you, sorry 🥰 You are not gonna get this man off you while he’s like this 🫠

🍺 He’s definitely leaving claw holes in the sheets and mattress 😉 probably right next to the last batch…

🍺 Sometimes he does this normally, but with the collar on, he’s definitely running on mindless instinct while rubbing his face all over you 🥺🥰 as if you didn’t already smell like everything from his cologne to his saliva by now 😒

🍺 All you can really do is pet him while he does this 🥰 especially because he’s still inside you and not moving anytime soon!

🍺 Obviously enjoys it, obviously feels a little better, but he’s still not exactly… proud of it? He has a lot of self-hate to work through on a daily basis, so it’s not your fault. He wants to do it! He likes it! He knows that you like it! You still love him for it! But…

🍺 Well, he can’t really worry about that right now when you’re lovingly biting his nose and distracting him with love and affection 😌

#wolverine #wolverine x reader #wolverine smut #wolverine x reader smut #wolverine headcanons #wolverine imagines #wolverine fic #logan howlett #logan howlett x reader #logan howlett headcanons #logan howlett smut #logan howlett x reader smut #logan howlett imagines #x men #x men x reader #x men headcannons #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel headcanons

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cameronsbabydoll · 13 days ago

Text

SUGAR-COATED CHAINS — CHAPTER SEVEN

WARNINGS — rafe is again very much a jerk, crying, angst, kinda a happy ish ending.

You woke up to silence.

For a second, you thought maybe Rafe was still there. That you’d find him sitting at the edge of your bed, watching you with that unreadable look, waiting for you to apologize without saying a word.

But he was gone.

The only proof he had even been there was the weight of something new on her nightstand. A sleek black box, the kind that came from somewhere expensive, somewhere you would have been giddy to receive a gift from before.

Your stomach twisted as you reached for it. Inside was a bracelet, delicate and glittering—diamonds, of course. Rafe never did anything halfway.

It was beautiful, but it was thoughtless.

You shut the box with a snap and set it aside, curling back under the blankets.

—

You ignored his texts. Then his calls.

It wasn’t an active choice at first. You just… didn’t know what to say. What could you say? Hey, it’s okay that you let them talk about me like that. It’s okay that you laughed. It’s okay that I let you make me feel stupid.

Eventually, the silence became intentional. Maybe you wanted to see if he’d chase you, if he’d care.

He didn’t.

At least not in the way you wanted him to. No messages asking if you were okay. No showing up to make things right.

Just one text: Come over.

Like nothing had happened.

You didn’t respond.

—

“You’re spiraling.”

Your best friend eyed you over the rim of her coffee cup, unimpressed, unsympathetic.

“I’m not spiraling.”

You absolutely were.

You had spent the last twenty minutes picking at the sleeve of your sweater, barely able to look up as you recounted what happened at the dinner.

The way Rafe had smirked at his friends’ comments, the way he ordered for you like usual—but instead of it feeling safe and exciting, it just felt wrong.

The way you had snuck off to the bathroom, only to hear the women whispering about you, laughing about you, like you were some silly little girl playing house with a man too big for her world.

Your friend just raised an eyebrow. “So what, are you gonna end things?”

The words felt heavy, impossible.

You shook your head. “I don’t know.”

“Babe.” A sigh. “You knew what this was.”

That stung the most.

Because you did know. You had known from the beginning that Rafe wasn’t soft, that his affection came with condescension, that every time he put his hands on you, it was more about control than love.

But that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

Your friend reached across the table, giving your hand a squeeze. “If you don’t like it, you need to leave.”

You swallowed hard, blinking down at your hands.

You could feel the words rising in your throat, the desperate, childish part of you that wanted to say, But I do like it. I just don’t like how it makes me feel.

—

You still didn’t respond to Rafe.

That night, you stayed in bed, scrolling mindlessly, half-waiting for another call, another text, something.

Instead, there was a knock at her door.

Your heart lurched. You knew who it was before you even checked the peephole.

Rafe.

Standing outside in slacks and a button-up, looking every bit the polished, untouchable man he was—so out of place against the softness of your apartment.

You hesitated before opening the door.

His eyes flicked over you, taking in your floral nightgown, the way your hair was still messy from sleep. He let out a quiet scoff, like you were something pathetic.

“Seriously?” His voice was low, unimpressed. “You’re still sulking?”

You opened your mouth, but nothing came out.

Rafe just sighed, stepping inside without waiting for permission. His eyes dragged over your apartment—the pastel bedding, the stuffed animals, the Sonny Angels still neatly lined up on your dresser.

He smirked. “No wonder they think you’re a kid.”

Your stomach twisted.

You turned away, hugging yourself. “I don’t want to do this right now.”

“You don’t want to do what?” Rafe scoffed.

“You’ve been ignoring me all day over that? I told you not to take it personally.”

You inhaled sharply, your throat tightening.

“I didn’t like it,” you admitted softly. “I didn’t like what they were saying.”

“They weren’t serious.” His voice was lazy, dismissive.

“You laughed.”

Rafe tensed for half a second, but it passed as quickly as it came. “Yeah? So what?”

That did it.

The tears hit all at once, spilling over before you could stop them. You clenched her fists, your breath coming short, your words tumbling out in choked little sobs.

“I don’t want to feel like this.” Your voice was small, breaking. “Like I’m stupid, or silly, or—”

“Jesus,” Rafe muttered, running a hand down his face.

You knew you sounded ridiculous, knew you probably looked even worse—barefoot, in your floral nightgown, crying over nothing.

But you couldn’t stop.

Rafe let out a sharp sigh before reaching for you.

You barely had time to react before he was pulling you in, dragging you into his chest, forcing you into his arms.

You hiccupped, your breath catching as he pressed your head against his shoulder.

“Enough,” he murmured, his voice a little softer now.

You shook your head against him, your fists weakly pushing against his chest.

“I mean it,” he said, shushing you as he slid a hand into your hair. “You’re being a baby.”

You felt like a baby. Sobbing into his chest, sniffling like a child while he held you in place.

And the worst part?

It felt good.

Even though he had caused this—this awful, twisting feeling in your chest—he was the only thing that made it go away.

Rafe pulled back just enough to wipe a tear off your cheek with his thumb, sighing like you were exhausting him.

You hiccupped, still curled into his chest, your fingers weakly gripping his shirt like you weren’t ready to let him go. Like, despite everything, despite knowing better, you still wanted him close.

Rafe’s hand moved to the back of your head, fingers threading lazily through your hair. “You done crying now?” His voice was quieter, almost resigned.

You sniffled, nodding against him.

“Good.” His palm slid down to your jaw, tilting your face up. “Then stop sulking and come here.”

You didn’t even think. You just let him pull you into his lap, your legs draping over his like it was the most natural thing in the world. Like you belonged there.

He leaned back against the pillows, one arm around your waist, the other resting lazily on his stomach. His grip was firm—possessive, almost. Like he was letting you cling to him, but it was still on his terms.

You chewed your lip, glancing up at him hesitantly. “Can we… can we watch a movie?”

Rafe exhaled through his nose, like you were impossible. “A movie?”

You nodded, already reaching for the remote.

He groaned but didn’t argue, just adjusted you against him as you scrolled through the options.

It didn’t take long for you to settle on something pastel and silly, something familiar, something that made your stomach twist with something childish and warm.

Rafe took one look at the screen and scoffed. “A princess movie? Jesus.”

You grinned, cuddling deeper into him. “It’s a classic.”

He didn’t fight you on it. Didn’t push you away, didn’t leave like he probably should have.

He just sighed, letting his fingers drag lazily up and down your spine as the opening credits rolled.

And you?

You let yourself pretend, just for a little while, that this was enough.

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mvltisstuff · 2 years ago

Text

going, going, gone - c.f

summary: y/n’s the only person who can get conrad, and he realizes that maybe he’s been falling for the wrong conklin.

conrad fisher x conklin!reader

gif from @conradfiisher

a/n: this will likely have a part two, so it probably won’t end here!! no promises as to when pt 2 is out but it will be there eventually ;)) this is literally me wishing i could slap some sense into belly

part two

“hey,” y/n greets, stepping into the beach house and finding conrad unpacking.

“hi,” he smiles lightly. the past few months have been nearly impossible. trying to crack conrad open is like trying to break into a safe. it took y/n forever to be able to understand conrad, and now that she finally did, there was an undeniable spark. she could sense the tension in his mind, knowing that something had set him off. he looked like he just wanted to break down, but he didn’t want to. if he did, he doesn’t know how to put himself back together.

“you ok?” she asks, cautiously. he’s almost like a wild animal, get too close and he runs away. especially since susannah died, he hasn’t been able to find a connection like the one he had with his mother.

“fine,” he mumbles, folding a few blankets onto the couch and placing some pillows beside it.

“conrad, don’t play this game with me again,” y/n sighs, stepping closer to him. he pauses in his movements to look up at her, slapping one last piece of decor on the mantle. “can we at least talk about the exam?”

“i, um,” he stutters, unable to find the right words that have disappeared in his mind. it’s like he completely pushed out the exam, all the other events had forcefully taken the excitement from it. “i feel really good about it, but it’s just an exam.”

y/n can tell in his slumped stance that something is truly disturbing him. he looks broken, and whoever did it certainly failed to put the pieces back together. it appears that they didn’t even try. “talk to me, conrad. please?”

he stops, breaking eye contact. he can’t look at her while he tells her because she can’t see his face when he says it. he doesn’t want y/n to see him crack under the pressure again.

“jeremiah and belly were making out on my car when i came out of testing. i walked out and there they were.”

“what?” y/n spits out, thinking about everything belly had told her before. “i thought she said she moved on-“

“yeah, i did, too,” his voice breaks, still avoiding any looks to y/n. if y/n sees him falling apart over belly, y/n would probably say something. the last thing conrad wants is for belly to know the affect this had on him.

“conrad, you know you can talk to me, right?” she steps closer, wanting to reach out her hand to him but knowing he probably doesn’t want it. he wants belly’s. “anything you say to me won’t get back to her.”

he slightly turns, finally letting his eyes wander up y/n’s body until they meet hers. he’s always found a trust in y/n. she’s been there since they were little kids, but it’s always felt different. there was an innocence to her, she felt like home and he could always run back to her if he needed her. he wouldn’t be able to handle it if he ruined that.

“i’m just so tired, y/n. it’s just one step forward and two steps back. i thought we could finally be over this, but they both just stabbed me in the back. on my car, during my test, in my hoodie. my mom always said belly was destined for me, but it just feels like jere took that.”

y/n can feel the hurt as well as see it on conrad’s face. she’s able to read him so well now that he’s not afraid to open up. she feels like they’ve gotten through a door, a point where they can share secrets and find a safety net in the other. “belly doesn’t deserve you, conrad. she’s not as mature as you, and you can thrive without her, i swear.”

“i’ll be ok, i just need a break from all this shit,” he groans, allowing y/n to finally walk up to him and hold his hand. “i don’t know if we can go back to the way things were after this.”

“i know i can’t change what happened, but i need you to understand that you’re not alone. at this point, you come first to me.” he nods, and y/n can see the sunrise in his face a bit more, but his mind is still covered with darkness. “if you need anything, please call me or come see me, ok?”

“deal,” he cracks a little grin, making y/n smile a bit in return.

“take care of yourself, connie,” she says before opening the front door. she starts the long drive home knowing what’s waiting for her there.

she plants her stuff down on the counter, letting her body relax after the hours behind the wheel. she starts to clean up some of the mess that she left on the counter when she hears squeaky footsteps come down the stairs.

“hey, you’re back already?” belly says, lurking into the kitchen to lean against the frame. y/n doesn’t say anything, she just looks at her and continues to organize everything. “what’s wrong, why do you look like that?”

“honestly, belly, i’m just trying to figure out what to say to you.”

“what do you mean?” belly asks, trying to think about why her older sister could have a reason to be mad at her.

“i stopped at cousins on the way home,” y/n informs her, belly knowing exactly where she left conrad.

“y/n, you can’t be pissed off because of what he told you-“

“no, belly, i have every right to be pissed. i’m pissed for conrad. you left him in the dust and you have no shame about it.”

“it just happened, jeremiah and i. i never wanted to hurt conrad, but im in love!”

“yeah, you were also in love last week with conrad. and the week before with jeremiah. you need to move on from them, bell,” y/n sighs, allowing belly some time to build another response.

“who are you to even say that?”

“because i’ve been there for both of them! i was there for jeremiah when you wanted conrad. i’m there for conrad because you are playing with their hearts like they’re toys. i can tell your hearts not fully in it with jeremiah, but i’m not gonna let you destroy those boys even more.”

“how am i destroying them?”

“belly, wipe that innocence off your face. you’ve managed to rip apart the fisher brothers because you cannot pick which one you like more.”

“but-“

“no, belly! listen to me,” y/n cuts her off before she can try and make anything better. “you couldn’t even contain yourself at susannah’s funeral because you were too worried about conrad. i know we are all grieving, but you are acting like you’re more worried about which brother likes you more. it’s exhausting having to clean up the mess you make over and over again. you’re slowly ruining this bond for me, for steven, for mom! you know i love you more than words, but if you keep playing with their feelings, belly, this family is going to be destroyed.”

“y/n, susannah told me-“

“use susannah as an excuse one more fucking time, belly.” the room goes deadly silent, y/n sick of the excuses and victimized mentality of belly. when steven comes stepping quietly into the room, he ganders softly into the chaotic mess that has formed between his sisters. she swipes her keys back off the table, grabbing an extra bag out of the closet. “i’ll be back.”

“where are you going?” belly says, eyes full of tears from her fear of confrontation. her voice was shaky, and y/n could still feel a sting of guilt in her chest. she hated to build a bigger wall between everyone, but belly had to hear it.

“i’m going to look after conrad, because you failed to do it,” y/n ends their conversation, slamming the front door behind her and moving to the car. she left the house with a terrible tone, but someone else needed her more. belly had jeremiah, taylor, steven, laurel, anyone she wanted. conrad had y/n, and that became enough for him.

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car-o-line · 29 days ago

Note

HIII!!! I LOVE YOU'RE POPPY PLAYTIME WORK SO MUCH!!! Could you do a jack kevin and matthew where the reader was jacks younger sibling and came back to the factor years later in there teens and a little reunite with each other (I NEED THEM TO BE BROUGHT OUT OF THE FACTORY AND READER SAYING TO DOEY BEACUSE THEY ARE 3 KIDS "So does that mean I have 3 brothers now?" Or somtehing like that sorry for this being long lol)

THE POPPY PLAYTIME STREAK CONTINUES🙏🙏🙏 this is literally adorable, if y/n and Jack are happy then I’m happy as well.

The Doey consciences with Jacks younger sibling who reunites with him<3

Info:

I think Jack is around 8 or something, so for the sake of that let’s just say that he was born in 1985 and made into Doey in 1993.

You were 4 years younger than Jack so you were 4 when he “passed” away.

Now you’re 13 and the reason you’re at Playcare is because you turned into an orphan there when erm, Kevin(I think) killed both your and Jacks parents.

You weren’t brought down to the labs like the other orphans, instead you snuck away from the Prototypes sight and paired up with Poppy to save the other orphans.

Sorry if this makes no sense, y/n lore is weird.

Also this is me editing, half of Jacks stuff is based about a whole ton of things so sorry about that😭

Jack Ayers:

He adored you when he had a normal life.

He would always be excited to play games or toys with you even if the toys you chose weren’t to his liking.

You were actually at the Playtime visit when Jack fell into the vat of dough, but the memory was so vague you could barely remember it.

All you knew is that your older brother, who wasn’t even that old, had gotten into an accident at the Playtime facility.

Then your parents got a call, a call to come visit the factory and see their “son” again. It would lead to their demise.

“Yes. It’s mommy and daddy and y/n! you remember, don’t you?”

“Leave. Me. Alone.”

“Hey. Hey, you’ll be okay. I promise. Mommy’s only here to talk.”

“No, no I don’t WANT to talk. Get out!”

“Susan, I think we should leave…”

“Jackie, I’m staying right here. I’m not leaving you. Not ever again, do you hear me?”

“The gentle voices lie. I know what they do, they lie..and they poke..and they hurt!”

“Mommy won’t lie to you, mommy won’t hurt you. I’d never hurt you-”

“Hey… hey open this door! Oh god, Susan! PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR LET Y/N AND I OUT! PLEASE-”

Unfortunately, both your mother and father died during that incident, that’s how you could recall everything. Their death was recorded on the VHS tape.

You were saved by a scientist who grabbed you out the last minute before Doey could do any harm to you.

After that you were brought down to the orphanage.

Fast forward into when you run into Pianosaurus and he tried to attack you.

And we all know what happened to him :(

But it’s okay because he wanted to kill you(I’m gaslighting myself rn)

Anyway! Matthew who was in charge at the time was shocked to see a child who was barely even a teenager.

So, he lead you to Safe Haven right away, he didn’t need a kid to be doing tasks for him and Poppy.

You went with him without resistance because even if you didn’t admit it, you were tired as hell.

You rested up in Safe Haven, unlike the player the toys were actually welcoming towards you. Some even recognized you as their past friend.

But there was a specific boy who recognized you more than anyone.

“I know them..I love them.”

“Huh..? Jack, you just met Y/n.”

“Y/n..y/n Ayers. Y/n Ayers right?!”

My boy was saying that out of excitement.

He let his emotions take him over and immediately went to go find you.

He was a bit overwhelming to say the least, Matthew had to calm him down.

Eventually he did calm down and Matthew and Kevin left him in control so he could speak with you as his brother.

He sat down on the ground while you laid in one of the Safe Haven beds. He grabbed your hand in his and played with your finger tips, curious.

You both talked for a bit, he apologized profusely for everything you’ve been through.

He told you about Matthew and Kevin, to which you asked if that meant that you have 3 brothers now. He pouted for a moment before nodding slightly, if it also went by his logic they were also his brothers. So it’d make sense that they’re your brothers as well.

Matthew Hallard:

Okay first off.

He’s pissed at Poppy for letting a CHILD do her dirty work for her, so he’ll definitely have a discussion with her about that later.

He’s more focused on not letting you out of Safe Haven for now, trying to make sure you’re as comfortable as you can be in a place like this.

Then he overheard something odd from Jack, talking to Kevin.

“We they were tinier, I’d let them ride my back like a horse..they really liked it.”

“Hm.”

“When who was younger Jack?”

“Me and Y/n! They’re my family!”

He immediately whipped his head towards him, calling a “I’m sorry?” at that.

It makes him remember when those people came by, saying Jack was their son. And a little child in their father’s arms, that was you. They killed your parents.

Either you didn’t mention it or completely forgot since it was long ago, either way he felt horrible. Even if it wasn’t directly his fault, he was part of the reason you were here. In this hell.

He made extra sure to treat you as gently and as kindly as he could, and make Kevin behave himself around you. He thought that it could bring flashbacks that you don’t want to remember.

Once you figured out about Jack being part of Doey, and talked with him a bit, Matthew asked you a few questions himself.

Nothing deep, just what your favorite animal was, or your favorite toy at Playtime was. Just a few icebreakers.

When you asked him if him and Kevin were basically your brothers now since they��re apart of Jack he gave you a wink and his signature smile.

(he thought you were too cute he could die)

“Of course!! Everyone here is family, especially us four.”

Kevin Barnes:

Like Matthew, Kevin was a bit pressed about Poppy having such a young person to fill out her list of commands, but he wasn’t too upset that he had to scream at her about it, he just thought she was stupid. Because, thinking logically, they were all kids. So what’s one more going to change?

He was wrong🫶

He was..more tolerant around you. Matthew tells him that you’ve been through enough already and that you needed to stay in Safe Haven and get rest, and he actually agreed with that himself.

Butttttttttttttt, he’s more thoughtful about he, Matthew and Jack, more than a teenager he just met.

That was until Jack said something about you.

“Kevin! Let me tell you something!”

“No-”

“I know Y/n!”

“Me too.”

“No, like before everything! They’re my family!”

“What.”

So that’s how Kevin started to pity you<3

He took the liberty of asking Matthew about you, information that he got from Jack..and that odd VHS tape.

Just because he finds you tolerable, that doesn’t mean he likes you(he loves you like you a sibling and he hates it)

So when you asked him if that since Jack is your brother, and that he’s stuck with him and Matthew that makes you and him siblings to.

His eyes watered a bit but shhhh(he needs a hug)

He still said you were a dumbo.

#Kevin’sLoveLanguage

I hate my life my writing was way too confusing to be this long😭

#platonic #poppy playtime doey #poppy playtime x reader #poppy playtime #ppt x reader #doey ppt #doey #doey the doughman #doey x reader #matthew hallard #kevin barnes #jack ayers #reader is a cutie patootie #erm what the sigma #its almost midnight #i want to be asleep #ok byeee #<3

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envy-of-the-apple · 9 months ago

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Keep Your Head In The Game

Yandere! Victoria Neuman x reader

(Warnings: threats of murder, non con touching/kissing, implied captivity)

Working at the Bureau had been your dream job.

Vought had ruined so many people’s lives. It felt good to be part of something that stood against that company for those who couldn't. Despite not having powers, even you could be a hero. You'd worked under Victoria Neuman for years. You knew everything about her.

And then Hughie Campbell ruined everything.

You’d like to think of him as a friend. You and him had lunch together sometimes. You’d sit and smile as he went on and on about his girlfriend. He was a nice guy. You’d like to think that he and you were close.

But Hughie broke you.

Evidence. He’d shown you evidence of what she’d done. So much blood. So much gore. The orphanage, the files.

“She’s one of them,” he’d whispered right before he fled into the night, “stay away from her. Quit. Please, for your sake, don’t go back to that fucking snake den.”

And then he was gone. Just like that.

Work in the Bureau continued as normal. Safe for the rumors of Soldier boy sightings, everything was so…fine, even without him.

Even Neuman was unphased.

She still smiled and laughed and told jokes as she surrounded herself with regular humans. She curled her lip when Supes were discussed. You used to love it when she brought Zoe around, but even her daughter you couldn’t even trust to be real.

Victoria didn’t act like a Supe.

But Hughie wasn't lying.

Friday night. The bureau had a party going on tonight. Another Supe had been successfully put away. Those were always a sight, especially considering Gina would get shitfaced. You couldn’t go, feigning illness before you slipped out the night. You couldn’t enjoy yourself, not when you had so much to think about.

Instead of enjoying the night with coworkers, you found comfort in the hardest liquor in your cabinet. Your one true friend.

Not Hughie. Not anymore. Hughie left. Or maybe he was killed. Who knows. Who fucking cares.

There’s a knock on your door. When you ignore it, it comes again louder. You groan, but you pull yourself off the couch eventually. Your neighbor again. You need to have a talk with her about disturbing you at odd hours of the night.

“You look like you’ve seen better days.”

You can only stare. Victoria tilts her head.

“Gonna let me in or will I have to stand out here?”

Against your judgment, the instinct of always listening to your boss kicking in, you open the door. She elegantly steps in, surveying your home.

She’s wearing that blue suit you’ve always complimented her on. Earlier, you would have admired her professional elegance. Now, it makes her look more inhuman. She looks even more out of place in your shabby apartment, studying your upkeep.

“Sorry,” you say when you stop gawking, “I…I hadn’t had time to clean up.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Victoria waves you off. “Just checking in on my favorite employee. How’re you feeling, by the way.”

“Good.” You quickly reply. “I was just feeling a little under the weather earlier. I hope I didn't worry you."

"Why wouldn't I be worried?" She tilts her head, grinning with straight white teeth that get increasingly eerie the longer you stare. "We're friends, aren't we?"

Before, you wouldn't have blinked twice at her words and tone. You would have mindlessly agreed, smiled even. But things were different now. You were playing pretend with a known murderer.

If you close your eyes, you can still remember the faces in that court before their heads exploded. You'd been behind a screen, watching it all in horror and you remembered closing your eyes and begging for Victoria to be alright, praying that it would be okay if everyone died but her.

And now to realize she caused all that?

"Maybe you have a fever. You're shaking."

You were. You clasp your trembling hands together, trying to ease your nerves.

"Yeah." Even your voice was wavering. Calm down. Calm down. "I still might not be over...whatever I came down with."

The predator clicks her tongue in sympathy, cooing as she nears her prey. You force yourself not to stiffen when she wraps a sturdy hand around your shoulders, leading you over to the couch. You sit next to her with your thigh pressed up against hers. You feel like you're about to vomit.

"You should rest," Victoria says, "take a few days off work. I'll let everyone know."

"Yeah," you say because this is good, it'll help you focus on what you need to do next, "definitely, thank you."

"Oh, please, don't thank me." She laughs. "I'm glad you're not in the office because you're sick. For some reason, I thought you were avoiding me. Y'know, 'cause you were scared, I would pop your head."

One second. Two seconds. And then you're up, scrambling off the sofa. It's instinct to run from monsters, no matter if they would take your head off your shoulders on a whim, whenever they want. It's instinct to be stupid and careless and run.

If anything, you should be grateful this monster is her.

She's strong, like all Supes are. Even though you know what she is, it takes you a moment to realize it's Victoria who had pinned you against the couch, keeping you underneath her. You used to win arm-wrestling competitions against her. The pressure caused your lungs to tighten, making it hard to breathe. Even has you struggled, tried to claw at her hands, tug on her pristine clothes, she didn't budge. You think the worst thing about all of this was that it didn't even look like it took much effort to keep you down. Like she was wrestling a kitten.

"Easy, easy." She hushes, tone soft and condescending. "C'mon, we're both adults, aren't we? Let's be civil here."

Civil. Like she had any right to use that word after what she's done for months, perhaps all her life. Your heart is a hummingbird frazzled with fear, but you can feel that twinge of anger and resentment even then. Something else too: betrayal.

"Why?" You asked, your voice failing. "Why, Vicky?"

For the first time tonight, her mask cracks. Her eyes flicker, looking at your defeated body before coming back up to your face. She looks remorseful, but not guilty.

"I didn't....I didn't want you to find out this way." She admits, slightly easing off you, enough to ease the force in your lungs. "Or maybe ever, actually. Fucking Cambell, leaving a mess, and then running off. What else can you expect from that guy, right?"

You just stare. Victoria sighs.

“Of all people, I thought you would understand.” Her voice wavers. “I thought you’d get it, somehow.”

You look at her, and you feel like you’re staring at that girl from Red River. Scared and Trembling Nadia, who just wanted love, someone to lean on. Someone who wasn't scared of her.

Then it flickers, and then Victoria's back.

"You murdered a whole room." You finally say. "How could you possibly ask me to understand that?"

She glowers, her frown deepens, and then she's sitting up, getting off you. You learn your lesson from last time, but you still huddle in the corner of the sofa, watching her.

"Right, because I'm supposed to believe you feel bad for them." Victoria rolls her eyes. "Half of those guys vacationed on Epstein's island before the brand change, and you were there when those deep fakes came out. Remember Congressmen Davis? He kept staring at your ass on the House Floor, so I'm not sure why you're acting like they're suddenly men of valor."

"Yes, yes, yes, they were terrible people." You press your hand to your forehead. "But you-we-we can't kill people. We-we're supposed to do things the right way and I just-" You choke on your words.

"Hughie got to you," she notes, "I knew I shouldn't have paired you up with each other."

"You lied to me." You murmur. There's no anger anymore, just heartbreak. "You lied to everyone. I thought we were fighting against Vought, but we've been in their pocket this whole time."

"We're still fighting-"

"You're Stan Edgar's daughter. We're in their pocket."

You press your hands to your face, squeezing. All the while you can feel Victoria watching. You ignore her. There's no point in talking to her, not anymore. You might not have known Victoria, but you know the Supe that committed a massacre. Her cover was blown. You were a leaking faucet she needed to turn off.

"What now?" You ask, drawing up to look at her. "Are you going to kill me?"

Her mouth twitches. Her eyes flicker with realization. A soft coo comes from her lips, utterly condescending. Suddenly, her posture changes: less intimidating, more welcoming.

"Oh, sweetie, is that why you're so upset?" She shifts until you're trapped in her arms. You don't bother fighting. Your bravery has run out. Tears are already dripping down your cheeks. "You thought I was gonna...." There's a laugh spilling off her lips. You squeeze your eyes shut when she hugs you tighter.

"I'm not gonna hurt you," Victoria says, a smile in her voice. "Not to you. Never to you."

Her hands are so warm as she cradles your face, forcing you to look at her. It's a gentle type of cruelty, forcing you to face your fears while the monster gives you a beautiful smile.

"I cherish you too much to do that."

You must look so lost. She laughs even more at that.

"Seriously? It wasn't obvious? C'mon, Zoe is crazy about you, she never shuts up. And I...I think it's better if I just..."

Her lips are soft. Gentle. You don't kiss back. You can't. You're frozen in ice.

"I won't hurt you." Then, her tone tightens just the tiniest bit. "You're friends and family, on the other hand..."

When she pulls away, she's the most relaxed you've ever seen her. You wish you could say the same. While her smile grows larger, so does the gaping hole in your stomach.

You close your eyes, slumping in defeat.

"What do you want?" You plead.

You can feel her lips press on your cheek. Victory.

When you walk through the door, Zoe looks elated.

She calls your name with a delighted giggle, reaching out to hug you. You wish you could return her enthusiasm, but you can barely pat her head.

"What're you doing here?" She asks when she's done hugging you, looking up at you with pretty eyes. Her eyes are much like her mother's; they just haven't lost their innocence yet.

Neuman steps in, a strong hand on your shoulder. That same gentle smile that holds the comfort a mother has for her daughter.

"Gas leak, right?" She turns to look at you. "Real nasty. So, I offered our home for a little while."

Zoe nods. She's the only thing so far that's remained stagnant. Maybe that's why you're more than eager to listen to what she did at school that day. She rambles on and on, and there's nothing left to say anymore. Until Victoria sends her daughter to bed.

"It's probably best to keep the real reason hush-hush," she tells you later, shutting the master bedroom.

You're seated pliantly on the bed, watching her shrug off her cardigan. The mattress sinks underneath your weight. Silk covers. It's too big for just one person.

You're not a captive, she explained in the back of her fancy black car. You could roam around, meet up with friends, call people, do whatever your heart desired. It would just be under her eyes from now on.

"A safeguard." She charitably explained, perfectly manicured fingernails drumming on her thigh. "Just so you don't do something we both might regret."

You don't know if she'd been telling the truth when she insisted your head was off-limits, but you knew she had your family's names and addresses. So you sat pliantly in that car, pliantly listened to Zoe, and pliantly followed Victoria into her bedroom.

On paper, you weren't a captive. But you and Victoria both knew better.

"Is Zoe also...?" You trail off, averting your eyes when she unbuttons her blouse. You can hear her clothes drop to the floor as she unabashedly rifles through her drawer.

"No," Victoria answers. And then your heart drops when she adds. "Not yet."

You shudder, but she's already sitting next to you. She coaxes you to look at her with a hand on your cheek. Even dressed down, she's gorgeous. Unblemished skin was barely covered by a silk gown.

You think she looks just as upset as you. Maybe even more. She pets your cheek thoughtlessly.

"When I brought you to my bed for the first time, I thought things would be different, somehow." She laughs. It sounds bitter.

"I never wanted this. Not for us," Victoria says, "but-but there's nothing else I can do. It...."

A tear drips down your face. She's pushing it away.

'You'll be okay." A kiss to your temple. "I know you will." Lips at your cheek.

When she finally gives into her inhibitions and kisses you, you know she was lying about it all.

#yandere #dark content #x reader #Dark #Yandere Victoria Neuman x reader #Dark Victoria Neuman x reader #Victoria Neuman x reader #Dark Victoria Neuman #Yandere Victoria Neuman #threatening #noncon kissing/touching

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avatar-anna · 1 year ago

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Champagne Problems

so...this is super long, the longest fic i've written in a hot minute. like 18.k words long. i wasn't going to post it until part two was underway, but i'm kind of excited to share it. here is the aftermath of champagne problems...

Part Two

*.*

"Don Perignon, you bought it, no crowd of friends applauded, your hometown skeptics called it Champagne problems."

Your fingers moved across the keys of the grand piano as you mumbled softly to yourself, only loud enough that the voice recorder on your phone would pick up on it. This wasn't your typical method of songwriting, you weren't even sure there was a song to actually write; but the melody had been haunting you for days, pressing against your mind until you finally sat down and played it.

It wasn't often you thought of the events that occurred a year and a half ago. You usually did everything in your power not to think about that night, knowing that nothing ever good came out of dwelling on that particular wrinkle of your past. You only looked forward, sometimes hoping that if you didn't think about what happened, your memories of the worst night of your life would eventually disappear from your mind altogether.

But there was something about this melody that brought that night to the forefront of your memory. You'd played it over and over on the piano for a few minutes, waiting for the words to come. Your mind kept circling back to the past, and after trying to avoid it, you finally let emotion win out. No one was in the studio with you anyway, it would be safe to unlock that particular box. Just for a few minutes.

"She would've made such a lovely bride, what a shame she's fucked up in the head," you said to yourself, the last part coming out as an afterthought. You laughed a little to yourself, remembering the disapproving stares and the whispers behind your back that people always thought went unnoticed by you. "But you'll find the real thing instead. She'll patch up your tapestry that I shed."

Despite knowing that leaving your would-be fiance was the right choice for you, breaking up with him was the hardest thing you'd ever done. It still hurt to remember that night, to recall the look of absolute devastation on his face when you stopped him from reaching into his pocket for the little velvet box you knew was in there. He didn't deserve to be wrecked so thoroughly, especially by someone like you. He had been sweet and kind and gentlemanly. He treated you like a princess and defended you to his family when they didn't approve. He was everything a man should've been to you and more.

And all you could do in return was prove his family right.

You stopped murmuring lyrics for a moment, letting that last thought float through the empty room on somber notes. You thought about your ex now, wondering where he was now and hoping he was well. You hoped he was in love and happy, that he'd forgotten all about you. He deserved all the best things that love could grant a person. You wanted that for him. You wanted someone who had the capacity for the kind of love he wanted to give.

Repeating the last few lines again, the next few thoughts came pouring out of you, the words carrying a bittersweet taste to them.

"Your mom's ring in your pocket, her picture in your wallet, you won't remember all my Champagne problems."

The song tapered off soon after that, and you realized there was nothing left in you to say. You felt lighter afterwards, as if pushing some of those long-forgotten memories out of you and onto the grand piano eased the weight you'd been carrying around on your shoulders for the last eighteen months. Quickly stopping the recording, you set a reminder on your phone to listen to it tomorrow and write down everything you'd said. The recording itself was lengthy, long pauses stretching between lyrics as you worked through your memories and attempted to vocalize them. Hopefully something was there to actually mold into verses and a chorus, if not, it was a rather odd but surprisingly satisfying therapy session.

Gathering your things into the bag at your feet, you stood up from the piano, stretching your arms above your head. It was easy to get lost in a good melody, but your poor body always paid the price if you spent too much time bent over a guitar or piano.

It was as you stretched that you realized someone was at the door. He was leaning against the doorframe, watching as you shouldered your bag and slipped your shoes back on your socked feet. He didn't say anything as you walked over to him, just stepped out of the way so you could walk out of the studio. Harry normally wasn't this quiet, in fact, he could be quite the chatterbox if the mood struck him. But his silence told you he'd probably heard more of your session than you would've liked. Because one thing Harry liked to do in all his chattering was pepper you with questions about yourself, which was annoying since you were constantly trying to have him not get to know you.

"Coffee?" was all he said as you walked toward the elevator at the end of the hall. The sleeve of his patterned sweater brushed against your arm, and you resisted the urge to lean into him. He always wore the coziest clothes when in the studio, and it made you want to walk just a little bit closer to his side, for no other reason than the feel of soft material on your arm and not the person wearing them.

Nodding, you said, "Sure."

Harry qucikly pressed the button when you reached the elevator, and you couldn't help but laugh a little. In the time you'd spent not getting to know him, you discovered that he was the kind of person that just had to press the elevator buttons. It didn't matter how many people he was with, it was like he took joy in something as simple as getting to press a button and watch it light up beneath his finger. He'd actually speed-walked to get ahead of you a couple times just so he could press the down button. It was kind of annoying, and perhaps a little childish, but you'd surprisingly grown to find it endearing. A quirk of Harry's that just made him who he was.

The ride down the elevator was quiet, and it wasn't until you were out on the street that he finally spoke. "I'm thinking about getting a pet."

You'd been bracing yourself for the inevitable questions about the song you'd been recording, and when they didn't come, your shoulders relaxed almost imperceptibly, though you were sure Harry noticed. "Really?"

"Yeah. All my friends are disgustingly in love," Harry said with a playful shudder. "I'm feeling like a third wheel most days, so I thought I would seek companionship of the furry variety. Wait, that came out wrong. I didn't mean—"

You chuckled at his stuttering, at the flush creeping up his neck and warming his cheeks. "I know what you mean," you said, sparing him any more embarrassment. "So what are you thinking then? Dog? Cat? Hamster?"

"Well, you see, that's the thing," he said, quickly recovering from his chagrin. "I'm not sure I have the time necessary to devote to training a puppy, but I'm also worried about getting a cat and it absolutely hating me, and..."

You listened as Harry explained in great detail the pros and cons of each kind of domestic animal one could have. He spoke animatedly with his hands, looking at you with those big green eyes of his, as if to make sure you were following his train of thought.

You never planned on befriending Harry, and even now you weren't sure that whatever was going on between you was considered a friendship. You'd always been the type to keep to yourself, especially after what happened with your ex. You'd not only lost him after the break up, but friends too, friends who thought that what you did to your ex was despicable and reprehensible and not worth keeping a friendship over, picking sides when you hadn't realized there were any. It hurt to lose so many people in one fell swoop, and you decided soon after that you were better off alone. Except for your brothers of course, but all of you kept so busy that it was hard to keep track of one another on a good day.

Outside of them, you realized it was hard to hurt someone when there was no one around you to hurt.

But Harry was different. You'd seen him around the building where you worked on your songs—in the hallways, waiting for the elevator (after pushing the button, of course), at the vending machine, on your way out of the studio or while he was entering it to start his session. The first thing you noticed was that he was never alone. Well, that wasn't entirely true. The first thing you really noticed was his smile, how it lit up his entire face and showcased the most adorable dimples you'd ever seen. But since you refused to admit that, the first thing you noticed was that he was never alone.

Harry was always coming and going with one or two or sometimes three people around him. He was always engaged in some kind of conversation, his head always turned as he listened aptly to what his friend was saying. It seemed so odd to you that he was hardly ever by himself. It was like a foreign language to you, and you imagined your constant solitude felt the same to him.

"Anytime you want to weigh in here would be great."

"If you want a pet, get one," you said simply.

Harry rolled his eyes as he held open the door to the coffee shop a couple blocks down the street from the building where you both worked, as if he was expecting anything other than your usual direct way of speaking. "If you don't keep this conversation going, then I'm going to have to ask about that incredibly depressing song you were working on, so please, indulge me in the great pet debate of twenty-eighteen."

For the most part, Harry was a pretty easy going guy. He had no problem carrying a conversation, and knew when not to pry. As the months went by, though, he knew how to get you to talk, how to find trap doors in the fortified walls you kept around yourself before you even knew they were there. It would be frustrating if his questions didn't always come with an endearing smile.

So you shrugged, eager to steer clear of any topics regarding your past. "I don't know, I'm a little biased. I've always been a dog person. Buddy's my best friend."

"First of all, I'm offended by the fact that I am not your best friend, and second, since when do you have a dog?"

The conversation paused while you and Harry went up to the counter to order you coffees. Both of you went there enough that the staff knew what you liked—dirty chai for you and an americano for him. It also meant you didn't have to deal with the barista having a mini-freak out at the realization that Harry Styles was in their coffee house. People tended to interrupt your conversations with Harry regularly—on the street, in line for coffee, at the table—but he never seemed bothered by it. He always smiled and indulged in a couple minutes of conversation and the occasional picture before waving goodbye. He always apologized to you afterward, but after the first couple times it happened, you waved him off. None of it was actually his fault, and seeing him interact with his fans became something you actually enjoyed watching. And it was perhaps a very small reminder as to why you preferred to just write songs for other artists, not perform them. You didn't need that kind of attention. For Harry, he seemed to come alive like a flower in bloom.

You? You would probably just wilt.

When you and Harry sat down with your drinks, he raised his brows for you to continue. Wrapping your hands around your cup, you shrugged again. "I've had Buddy for about a year now."

"What kind of dog?"

"Mostly pitbull, I think. I found him in an alley behind a restaurant once, and I know what shelters do to pitbulls, so I adopted him."

You'd come to think of the whole thing as Buddy finding you.

"And you named him Buddy?"

"Yeah, I don't know, after Buddy Holly I guess." You'd grown up listening to classic rock because your brothers did, and the name just kind of made sense to you. And he was just so cute, he was your little buddy. Big buddy now, you supposed. You thought he deserved the cutest name for the cutest boy in your life.

The rest of your time in the coffee house was filled with chatter, mostly from Harry. He talked a little more about the Great Pet Debate, then about the project he and his team was working on. An album, though they were only just getting started seeing as Harry just came back from tour. He tried peppering you with the occasional question, knowing if he asked too many you'd clam up and shut down. It was almost like Harry knew that you were fighting getting to know him, but that it wasn't just him, it was everyone. He was patient with you for some reason, though, seemingly content to chip away at the brick walls around you. Even if all he had was a spoon.

"So...What were you working on at the studio?" Harry finally asked.

You knew it was coming, so answering didn't seem so daunting. "I'm not really sure. The melody had been in my head for days, and I finally decided to play around with it."

"A perfect non-answer from Y/n L/n, everyone," Harry said, though you knew he was joking. His eyes were crinkled with mirth as he hid behind his cup, his brows raising to give you a knowing look.

Nothing about your past was easy to talk about, so you just didn't. After your breakup, you didn't even tell your brothers the finer details, not wanting to relive it or face all their questions. It all brought you an overwhelming sense of shame and despair. But maybe there had been something cathartic about your session today and it left you feeling lighter and open because you found yourself sharing more with Harry.

"It...reminded of me and my ex, so I kind of just let it all out. I'm not even sure what I was doing constituted as songwriting, but," you looked down at your mug. "The melody dredged up some old memories, I guess."

"It sounded painful," Harry said, his voice taking on a soft, sincere tone.

You knew he meant well, but the sympathy made you skittish. "It's fine. It was a long time ago."

"Right, of course," Harry said, catching on to your mood change. "Well, um, my friends and I are having a little get-together of sorts this Saturday. You should come."

"A party?"

"No. A get-together. Very different," Harry corrected.

It made sense, the last time Harry tried to invite you to a party his friend was throwing, you politely declined, claiming they weren't really your thing. They weren't, but it was more that having friends wasn't really your thing.

You wanted to say no again, but when you met Harry's eyes, something in you hesitated. His expression was open, earnest, like he would genuinely be upset if you said you wouldn't come. You didn't quite understand why he wanted to spend time with you so much. Maybe you felt a little bad for always pushing him away, or maybe you were actually warming up to him.

"I, um...that might be fun," you said, not sure if it was nerves or excitement swimming in your belly.

The way Harry's face lit up made saying you would come worth it.

After a few more minutes at the coffee house, you and Harry went your separate ways, but not before he made you promise to join you on one of your morning walks with Buddy Holly. Something must've been in the air today, because you found yourself nodding before heading down the street away from him.

On your way home, you got a phone call from your oldest brother Evan. "Hey, Evan. How's life treating you in the Big Apple?"

"Just fine. It'd be a lot better if I got to see my kid sister more often. Are you still coming for Thanksgiving?"

Of your three brothers, Evan was the one who checked up on you the most. Perhaps that was the nature of being the oldest of four, but he had always been the most responsible, the one to keep you and your other brothers in line. Well, mostly your other brothers. But Evan had always looked out for you. He was the only one you told at length about your breakup. You'd confided in him all your life, and he was coincidentally the only one of your brothers you could count on not to go and beat up on your ex or his family.

"Flight's booked and everything," you told him. "Not sure if I can swing a trip to the lake house, though."

Despite your less than ideal upbringing, you and your brothers had all done pretty well for yourselves. No thanks to your parents, seeing as you all shared a dad who never liked to be with the same woman twice. But you and your brothers all stuck together through thick and thin, supporting and celebrating and sticking together despite the differing parentage between the four of you. And now you were all scattered, your brothers Andrew and Hayden were professional athletes and Evan was a bigshot lawyer. Once you moved out of your hometown, you really only saw your brothers for holidays. And the occasional surprise visit from Andrew, though that hadn't happened in a while.

"That's okay," Evan said. "Next time."

"Next time," you agreed. Then, "How's the family?"

"Good. Sammy's gotten so big. And Laura's already showing."

You grinned as you imagined Evan's family. He deserved a happy ending with a loving family after raising you and the idiots you called brothers. "Another team member for the family football game."

"Speaking of the family football game," Evan said, and you mentally cursed yourself. "Laura's been dying to know if she should set an extra spot at the table."

Immediately, your mind went to Harry, but you quickly whisked that thought away. "Nope. Unless Hayden's got a new girlfriend."

"Really? No one?"

You narrowed your eyes even though Evan couldn't see your expression. "Why are you fishing? Gossip is Andy's thing."

"What? I'm not fishing!" Evan spluttered, but you just scoffed and waited. Evan might've been a shark in the courtroom, but he'd always been terrible at lying to you. "Fine. Laura was reading one of her gossip magazines, and you know I don't pay attention to those, but you know, I might have seen someone who looks an awful lot like you pictured alongside a former boy band member."

Well, shit. You knew that was a reality of being Harry's acquaintance, but you'd always done your best to not pay any attention to it. So far it had done a good job, but now it was coming to bite you in the ass.

"It's nothing, Evan. He's an artist. I'm a songwriter. We work in the same building," you said.

"Fine! Fine," Evan said, and you could just picture him holding his hands up in surrender the way he'd done since you were a teenager. "I just thought I'd ask now and try to soften the blow. I'll just leave you to the wolves."

"Damn you, Evan," you muttered. Evan was the easy brother. It was Andrew and Hayden you had to look out for. They would interrogate you relentlessly, or worse, squeeze the life out of you until you caved. Sighing deeply through your nose, you said, "I will ask if Harry has plans for that weekend. And that is it."

"See? That wasn't so hard!"

You rolled your eyes. "I'll talk to you later."

"You love me!" Evan called just before hanging up.

The call ended just as you pulled up to your apartment. You sat back with a huff, marveling at the strings your brother managed to pull from thousands of miles away. But deep down, you knew Evan was just looking out for you. After everything that happened eighteen months ago, he'd been keeping a close eye. As close an eye as he could all the way from New York. But that was how things worked between you and your brothers. You all looked out for each other, and your older brothers acted as personal security guards to any and everyone who so much as looked at you the wrong way. It was both endearing and very annoying.

Very annoying. Now you had to invite Harry to Thanksgiving. Evan was so going to get it.

*.*

On Saturday, you found yourself standing in front of your mirror longer than you normally would've. Harry had used the term "get-together" as a means to ease your nerves, but now that the dreaded day had come, you realized you weren't sure what that meant in terms of dress code. Was this thing laid-back? What if casual still meant dressy to Harry and his friends? Harry usually walked around the studio in jeans and faded t-shirts, but he was still a celebrity. He could see this as an opportunity to dress up.

You looked at all the clothes spread out in your room. You'd changed an embarrassing amount of times now, but nothing seemed fitting for the occasion. I could always text him, you thought, biting your nail as you surveyed the tornado of clothes around you. Harry had given you your number earlier this week so he could text you his address. You hadn't wanted to, as it would open the flood gates for conversation outside the studio, but you eventually gave it up when he stared blankly at you after offering your email as an alternative.

Before you could think too long about it, you picked up your phone and sent a quick text. Before you even had a chance to set it down, Harry sent a reply.

Harry S: We're just chilling at my house. Dress as comfortably as you'd like :))

Well, that wasn't helpful at all, you thought, but didn't say to Harry. You went back to rummaging through your pile of clothes, creating a spot for Buddy when he ambled into your bedroom from the kitchen. In the end, you settled on something simple: jeans, platform shoes, and a colorful fleece jacket over a plain shirt. It felt silly to have wasted so much time on your wardrobe when all you were doing was going to see Harry. And his friends. And that was...intimidating.

The anxiety of meeting Harry's friends, of meeting anyone new, crept through you. You didn't want to go and face the inevitability of disappointing them. Your track record with friends was pretty abysmal. But you found yourself kissing Buddy's head and promising you wouldn't be gone long, and then you were getting in your car and plugging in the address Harry had given you.

The music playing in your car calmed you some. Etta James' voice was both familiar and comfortable, welcome feelings as you pulled up to Harry's house. House was a bit of an understatement, though. Maybe a villa, or an estate. The LA version of those sprawling castles that were all over Europe. Your shoulders were tense as you cruised up the long driveway, though your anxiety eased a bit when you saw that had seen about as much life and mileage parked up front as yours did.

Music was playing inside the house, you could hear the trill of soft guitar and the low hum of a male voice from outside, and you worried if anyone would be able to hear you as you knocked on the door. Thankfully, you only stood on Harry's doorstep for a minute or two, then Harry's familiar grin greeted you.

"You made it!" Harry said, pulling you over the threshold and in for a quick side hug. He looked down at you for a moment, his cheeks flushed and green eyes bright, perhaps from drinking. He shook his head a little before pulling you further into the house. "Come in, come in, everyone is just through here."

Harry led you further into his home, giving you a chance to look around. Despite the grandeur of the outside, Harry's house was actually quite cozy and inviting. Everything was in warm tones, and potted plants and bookshelves piled high with a mix of books and records with titles you couldn't read from this distance. His house looked actually lived in, which couldn't be said for some of the other celebrity homes you'd been in. It didn't happen often as you preferred to work alone, but you occasionally dabbled in writing sessions with other artists. Their homes looked much more modern, and much more cold, than Harry's did.

"My home in London is much smaller," Harry said, noticing your craned neck. Then he shrugged, looking a little sheepish. "But I liked the look of this place. It reminded me of a house I go to in Italy most summers."

"It's beautiful," you said. "I've always wanted to go to Italy."

"You've never been?"

You shook your head, admiring the arch leading into an open kitchen. "I was supposed to go for—"

For my birthday, you couldn't bring yourself to say. Gavin had planned a summer trip to Italy for your birthday, but that never happened. You surprised yourself by revealing that much, and by the way Harry's eyes lit up, you'd taken him by surprise too.

But he didn't press you to finish your thought. He just smiled and led you further into the kitchen. "Come on. You need a drink."

Harry talked while he fixed up your drink. He'd tried to persuade you to take a shot of tequila with him, his eyebrows wiggling up and down, a look on his face that you'd seen one too many times on your brothers when they were trying to stir up trouble. You declined with a laugh, opting for a glass of wine instead. Maybe a boring choice, Harry definitely thought so as he teased by saying, "Booooring!" but you needed to be sharp, and tequila tended to have the opposite effect, so red wine it was.

"Everyone's through here. I hope you like games because Kid brought a new one over and everyone has become quite invested."

Games? Is that what Harry Styles did on his evenings off? Play board games with his friends? Before you could ask, Harry led you into his living room, where everyone was in fact sitting around a rather spacious coffee table, a board game and playing cards spread out around it. It was a small group of about five or six. For some reason you expected more people, even though Harry said otherwise. They were all talking amongst themselves, talking strategy, you presumed, as you recognized the game as one of those territory-winning ones.

All the talking stopped, however, when Harry introduced you to the group.

You felt their eyes on you, judging, picking you apart where you stood. You began to curl in on yourself, wilting at the attention. Involuntarily, you took a step back, but Harry's hand was on your lower back, warm and comforting against you. You should've pulled away, but you didn't, thankful for at least some kind of familiarity among all the new.

It had been so long since you'd had to meet new people in a non-professional setting. You'd met with producers and artists and other industry people all the time, but there was always a wall of professionalism between you and them. You knew how to navigate that space with ease, but here, where people were sitting on pillows and holding playing cards, where you stood as the outlier among what was clearly a tight-knit group, you felt very much like a fish out of water. A fish in space.

"H—Hello," you managed to say, giving everyone a small wave.

One person got up. A young woman with short brown hair, winged eyeliner marking the corners of her eyes. Her smile was surprisingly warm, but what had your eyes widening even more was when she pulled you in for a hug, squeezing tight.

"I'm Sylvia," she said. "It's so nice to finally meet you."

"Finally?"

You probably shouldn't have said that, but you weren't expecting such a warm welcome.

"Harry talks about you constantly. I swear sometimes he purposely keeps you from us."

"That is not—That is not true," Harry said, speaking to you for a moment. He sounded serious, but his eyes were filled with amusement as if he was used to Sylvia's teasing.

Everyone else introduced themselves, and you tried to keep a smile on your face as you committed their names to memory. They were all part of Harry's "team" except for Sylvia—writers, producers, musicians. "And you?" you asked her as she pulled you down to sit next to her. Sylvia had insisted you be on her team while you learned how to play. She seemed nice, eager to get to know you, but you didn't trust it. Not yet.

"I'm a full-time mom most days, and a part-time life coach to this one," Sylvia joked. She seemed too young to be a mother, but you supposed they came in all shapes and sizes. "But I'm Harry's nutritionist. And friend when he's not being a pain in the ass."

There was a wry grin on the young woman's face that told you she was fond of Harry, and fond of teasing him, if said grin grew when Harry said, "Hey," was anything to go by. It eased your mind a bit, her kindness and obvious fondness for Harry. She spoke animatedly as she caught you up on the rules of the game and gossip from her yoga class. "They're all in love with that one, of course. Can't take him anywhere," she said with a nod in Harry's direction.

When you agreed to join Harry tonight, you figured you would spend your time with him. But Sylvia kept you occupied most of the evening, and he and his friends were rather invested in the game. You were content to watch, enjoying the playful bickering and shouts of surprise and celebration. It was interesting to see how they all interacted with each other. Harry and his friends sat and drank around his coffee table while you nursed your drink, observing with the sweet feeling of nostalgia swimming through your veins.

"Y/n?"

You jumped in your spot on the floor, your wine sloshing around in your glass a little. Thankfully, nothing poured out. You would've been mortified if you'd spilled red wine all over Harry's most likely exorbitantly expensive carpet.

Eyes flicking to a man with short blond hair, you said, "Sorry?"

Kid, you were pretty sure his name was, asked his question again. "Did you first start writing here in LA?"

"Uh...no. Nashville, actually," you said. "I lived in Nashville for a while before moving out here. But I...grew up in a small town just outside."

"You never told me that," Harry said, sounding both intrigued and a little hurt that you'd never shared that with him before.

Emboldened by your near-empty glass, you said, "You never asked."

That earned a few chuckles and a raised brow from Harry as if he'd just accepted a challenge you hadn't meant to create. But you read that look in his eyes with ease. Any look was quite easy to read from Harry. He was expressive, an open book. He was going to take this as an opportunity to ask you all the questions he'd been witholding.

Throwing back the rest of your wine, you avoided his eye and ignored the excited flip in your belly.

*.*

If it wasn't for your dog, you were pretty sure you wouldn't be able to keep up with Harry Styles and his impossibly long gait.

He'd kept to his word, insisting that he join you on one of your walks with Buddy Holly. It wasn't until a few days after you went to his house for the first time, but one morning before you usually headed into the studio, he texted and asked if he could join you for your morning walk with your dog. It took some convincing, which really only meant a series of uninterrupted texts until you finally relented.

Buddy took to Harry immediately, of course, though that wasn't a surprise, seeing as your dog was friendly with everyone. But it meant a lot to you that he seemed to like Harry so much. Buddy was a rescue, and you couldn't imagine the awful things he'd been through before you'd given him a proper home.

Now he walked on the sidewalk excitedly, pulling you on his leash as his stubby tail waved around wildly. Harry walked beside you, his curly hair pulled back with a little black claw clip, some of it sticking up in a cute tuft. As he walked beside you, you took the opportunity to study him. There was a little scruff on his cheeks and jaw, creeping down the nape of his neck. His jaw was strong and angular, his cheekbones sharp. Harry really was beautiful. You understood why so many people went so crazy for him.

"See anything you like?"

Warmth flushed your cheeks as you quickly looked ahead, even if the damage was already done. Harry rarely, if ever, caught you staring at him, mostly because it didn't happen often. But in the last few weeks, you'd found yourself admiring him more and more. The movements he made with his hand as he told a story, the mischievous glint in his eye when he made you laugh, the way his arms moved beneath his shirt, how his lips curled around a smile. You cataloged each mannerism, each vocal inflection, and after just a few weeks following that night at his house with his friends, you felt like you knew him quite well.

Shrugging, you feigned nonchalance as your eyes darted back to Buddy, who had stopped to sniff a tree.

You could feel Harry's gaze on you, but you tried not to squirm. His gaze pricked your skin, making you feel things you absolutely shouldn't have been feeling. It was uncomfortable and exhilarating, and you didn't like how much you were warming up to him.

Used to your wordless answers, Harry moved on. "You're making me rethink my decision to get a cat."

"You decided, then?"

"I think I'm more of cat person," Harry said. "Well that, and I think I've found the one, but I'm worried about all the traveling."

"It can stay with me," you said, eyes widening when you did. But it was true, you realized. You were close enough to Harry to promise that kind of thing.

"Well, in that case," Harry said, and you finally looked over to him.

His grin was wide as he looked down at you, and though you couldn't see his eyes behind his sunglasses, you knew they were more than likely squinted with mirth. You liked that smile, you realized. It was uninhibited, full of warmth and good intentions. You wanted to trust it, to give in to the friendship Harry was offering.

But you couldn't. Harry didn't deserve the abysmal companionship you offered in return, and you felt bad for leading him along when you knew you'd eventually fuck things up. You always did.

Your phone buzzing thankfully pulled you away from your thoughts. Looking at it, you saw a text from your brother, Hayden. You think Laura will be cool with a few football players in her house for Thanksgiving? it said, and you shook your head as you typed a quick reply, a small grin spreading across your face.

Hayden was only going to be in town the day of Thanksgiving, as he had a game the day after. You didn't think he would make it at all, seeing how full his schedule usually was, but he managed to squeeze it in. Apparently his game wasn't too far from Evan's house. As long as he, and his teammates now, didn't drink too much, they would be just fine.

You: I don't think so. Laura might put y'all to work around the house though.

Hayden: Seems fair.

Hayden: Are YOU bringing anyone home?

Hayden: Because I can sit you next to one of my teammates.

Hayden: I take that back. Forget I said that. No teammate of mine is going near my sister.

Rolling your eyes, you stuffed your phone in your back pocket. Harry was looking at you with a curious gaze, and you scrambled to explain yourself. "My brother," you said. "Apparently he's inviting some of his football buddies to Thanksgiving this year."

"Does he play at university?" Harry asked. You could almost hear the eagerness in his voice at the opportunity to learn more about you, and while sharing in general made you squirm, your brothers were fairly easy to talk about.

"He did. He's in the NFL now."

"Oh nice You must be—Wait what's his name?"

"Hayden?"

Harry stopped walking for a moment. When you tried to stop too, Buddy protested, tugging the leash, and the wrist you had wrapped around it pulled uncomfortably. Murmuring a quick apology, Harry kept walking, keeping pace with your energetic puppy.

"Your brother is Hayden L/n?"

You nodded. "I'm guessing you've heard of him then?"

A bark of laughter slipped from Harry's lips. You'd never seen him so caught off guard before. It was strange, but also a relief to know that someone as steady as Harry wasn't so unflappable all the time.

Rubbing a hand over his mouth, he said, "I think everyone has heard of him. Any other famous brothers I should know about?"

"I don't know how you quantify fame, but my other brother is in the NHL. He plays for a team on the east coast."

Andrew was the youngest of your family. Despite that, he still considered himself your older brother, which had always been annoying growing up, especially when you were taller than him for a few years. He was rather sweet for someone so aggressive on the ice. He spent a lot of time with his mom, but was still close to you, Evan, and Hayden. It was hard not to be when you all shared the same deadbeat dad.

Outside of Evan, you probably talked to Andrew the most. You were the closest in age and grew up going to school together, and while his main focus was hockey, whenever he was in town, he'd go with you to concerts to see whatever indie band you were into or treat you to tickets to a show at the arena he played for.

"You have a third, right?" Harry asked, and you weren't even surprised that he remembered even though you were sure you'd only mentioned it once or twice.

"Evan. He's a lawyer in New York, but he lives in Connecticut with his wife and daughter," you said.

Now would be the perfect opportunity to invite Harry to Thanksgiving. You were looping back around on the trail, heading back to the park entrance where you'd met Harry this morning. Evan would pester you about it until you did, or worse, get Hayden and Andrew involved. You just had to throw it out there, be as casual as possible. Easy. You were all about being casual.

"So, um, he—Evan—he, um, said if I wanted I could invite a friend to Thanksgiving. If I wanted to."

"Oh yeah?" You weren't looking at him, but you could hear the grin in his voice.

Swallowing thickly as you willed your cheeks not to flush, you continued to look at Buddy as you spoke. "You probably already have plans, but I just thought I would ask if you wanted to come. Laura, Evan's wife, is a great cook, and it's usually pretty low-key until football gets turned on. But no offensive aunts or uncles or anything like that. Just us."

That was definitely too many words, but the amused look in Harry's eyes didn't feel antagonizing. "I would love to, but um, I already promised my mum I would go home that week."

"Oh." You didn't mean to sound disappointed. It was a good thing that Harry was going home to see his mother. And him meeting your brothers for the first time all at once probably would've scared him out of talking to you in the studio, so really it was for the best. It was for the best. "That's okay. You must be excited to go home. How long has it been?"

"London? Not too long, but I'm headed back to Manchester, and my mum has not been shy in letting me know that it's been too long since..."

You listened to Harry the rest of the walk back, trying to fight off the disappointment gnawing inside you that he'd said no. You didn't want that feeling in you. You wanted to be indifferent. It's for the best. You repeated it over and over until you convinced yourself it was true.

*.*

"You had a speech, you're speechless. Love slipped beyond your reaches. And I couldn't give a reason, Champagne problems."

You scribbled in your notebook, crossing out words from the original recording and replacing them with better ones. You hadn't planned to go back to this song. After recording it on your phone, you figured it wouldn't see the light of day again. But something kept bringing you back to it. So you worked on it between other projects, playing around with the lyrics and melody in small doses so that the past wouldn't overwhelm you.

Guilt seeped into your bones as you recalled what happened eighteen, almost nineteen, months ago. Sometimes you wished you could forget everything you'd done, but other times you decided being forced to remember was part of your penance for causing so much pain. Gavin was a good man. He was so kind and so smart, he didn't have a cruel bone in his body. And you'd taken his goodness, you'd welcomed all his kindness, and crushed it in your hands.

Wiping away a tear, you shut your notebook definitively. Your session in the studio was far from over, but you were done for the day.

On your way out, you kept your head down, not wanting anyone to see your watery eyes. You could feel the tears building, and you hoped you could at least make it to your car before you turned into a mess. It was so hard sometimes. Some days you felt great. You would write good songs, take Buddy for a walk and teach him a new trick, you would get coffee with Harry and laugh, and everything would be fine. But then there were days where the mere thought of the past sent you careening off course, leaving you with nothing but the intrusive thoughts you thought you'd learned how to keep at bay.

Today happened to be one of those days, and you hoped you could escape and wallow in self-pity unnoticed. But before you could even make it to the elevator, you bumped into something solid and warm. Arms wrapped around you to hold you steady before you could spring back, and against your better judgment, you looked up, an apology poised on your lips.

"Y/n, are you okay? What's wrong?"

You should've known that you would be unlucky enough to run into Harry on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Blinking rapidly, you shook your head and stepped out of his grasp, though that didn't make you feel any better. "I'm fine."

"You can talk to me," Harry insisted. His brows furrowed with concern, but he didn't come any closer. There was a bag slung over his shoulder and a hat covering up his hair, with only a few stray curls sticking out beneath it. He looked like he was just going into the studio for a session.

"I'm fine, I promise," you lied, not wanting to be the reason he was late for studio time. "I'm just leaving for the day."

You tried to step around Harry, but his hands fell down on your shoulders. His gaze burned, but you couldn't make yourself look him in the eye. You knew the moment you saw the sympathy swimming in them you'd burst into tears.

"Please let me go," you said, but it came out as more of a squeak, your voice breaking on the last word.

To your surprise, Harry did, and even though that was what you'd asked for, what you wanted, you somehow felt worse. Shuffling around him, you mumbled a quick goodbye and bypassed the elevator, not wanting to wait awkwardly for it to come up while he was still in the hall. It wasn't until you finally got in your car that you let everything out, all the guilt and loneliness and self-loathing that you kept bottled up regularly.

So often you were able to pretend the past didn't exist. But then there were days where you were almost slapped in the face by the consequences of your actions. Negative thoughts followed you all the way home and into your bed. Not even hiding under the covers kept you from feeling everything all at once. Your mind spun as you thought of Gavin, of his elated grin crumpling into a look of betrayal as you told him you were ending it.

You remembered every detail from that night. The brand of Champagne Gavin bought for the would-be occasion, the woodsy cologne he wore, the looks on his friends' and family's faces as you hurried down the stairs to leave the party, unable to bear their shame and disapproval, or the heart you'd broken on the landing in his family's mansion.

You didn't know he was going to propose until mere moments before it happened. You had only been seeing Gavin for a few months, and things were good. He made you happy, and you liked having someone to go through life with. He liked to shower you with expensive gifts, for no other reason than to show you he cared and because he could. You didn't have the same kind of wealth he or his family did, not even with the substantial amount of money you made as a successful songwriter. But you'd write him poems and leave them places you knew he'd find them and looped your arm through his at company parties. Things were good.

Every year, Gavin's family hosted a Christmas party, and last year was the first time you'd been invited. You hadn't wanted to go, mostly because in the two weeks leading up to the party, you realized you weren't in the same place Gavin was emotionally, and you weren't sure you ever would be. But Gavin insisted, promising it would be fun and he wouldn't abandon you to his family, who had been nothing but cold since the moment he'd introduced them to you. So you went, sipping on Champagne in a glass made of crystal and wondering if the guilty pit at the bottom of your stomach would ever stop growing.

It was a couple hours into the party when you'd stumbled on a conversation between Gavin's mother and sister, one that made your blood run cold with dread.

"Did Gav really ask you for your ring?" his sister asked.

His mother nodded gravely. "He wants to do it tonight."

"What? That's ridiculous! They've barely been together a year!"

"I'm sure she would make a lovely bride, she's beautiful, I'll give her that," his mother conceded, but you could hear the disdain in her voice loud and clear. "It's just a shame that she's—"

"Fucked in the head?"

"Larissa! Language!"

"What? She is! She's a total basket case, and everyone can see it but him. She'll never make him happy. How could she? Putting a ring on it doesn't change a thing. Gavin would have a psych patient, not a wife. He deserves better."

The rest of the night was a blur, but you knew you couldn't wait. You didn't want to break up with Gavin on the night of his family's Christmas party, but if he was going to propose, you couldn't let him. The hurt would be so much worse if you had to slide the ring off your finger a week or two after the proposal.

Gavin called you for weeks afterward, begging you to help him understand. His family did too, and his friends, people you considered friends as well, but it was clear once there was a line drawn in the sand where everyone stood, and they didn't have any trouble letting you know how horrible you were for doing what you did. Sometimes when you let yourself get angry, you wondered why Gavin's mother and sister, or any of them really, were so aggressive about your break up. They'd never wanted you to be with him in the first place, and even though they'd gotten their wish, they still called you a heartless monster.

But above all that, Gavin's messages made the deepest cut. He sounded so devastated in each voicemail. And at first, all he wanted was to talk, to somehow work it all out as if it was one big misunderstanding. I know my family can be a lot, but I love you so much, he'd said in a text. We can go to Italy like we'd planned. Elope. Buy a little cottage and just start a new life somewhere else. Please, Y/n. Talk to me. I love you.

Messages like those were the toughest pills to swallow. You knew Gavin loved you, you never doubted that for a moment. The problem was you didn't feel the same. You didn't know why. You cared for Gavin a lot, and in the beginning, you had all those giddy, initial relationship feelings, but they never developed beyond that. And when you noticed Gavin's feelings growing more and more each day while yours didn't, you started to panic.

But it was when those messages turned angry, hateful even, that hurt the most. It was what you deserved after what you'd done, but to know that you'd turned one of the gentlest souls you knew into a spiteful one killed you almost as much as stopping him from getting down on one knee had.

In the midst of all your crying and hyperventilating, your phone buzzed. Wiping your eyes and nose, you lifted your phone to your face, squinting at the bright light.

Harry S: I know you probably want space, but I'm here for you xx

You shouldn't be, was your first thought, but all you texted back was, Just a bad day that's all.

Harry's response was almost immediate, as if he was waiting around for your reply.

Harry S: Well, if you ever need a friend, you know where to find me :))

You sighed, feeling another wave of tears overwhelm you. The pressure of friendship weighed heavily on your chest. All you could offer was disappointment, and you couldn't stomach the thought of letting someone like Harry down. He was too good a person to be your friend. All you could offer him was disappointment and pain. You were toxic, and better off left alone.

You: We're not friends. I don't want to be your friend so just leave me alone.

*.*

Weeks went by and you were positively miserable. Thanksgiving came and went, and even your brothers could sense not to pry about your sour mood. Evan tried to get you alone, but you didn't want to talk. You didn't want to explain how you'd fucked things up so royally. Again. You didn't want his sympathy, or Hayden's promise to fight anyone who hurt you, or Andrew's cheesy jokes to lift your spirits. What you wanted had been all the way in England and had been giving you the cold shoulder. Just like you'd asked.

Harry stopped saying hi to you at the studio, which hurt more than you thought it would. In the grand scheme of things, you hadn't known him very long, but seeing him in the hallway and watching him purposely avoid you felt awful. You only had yourself to blame, but you thought it was better to let him down early on than further down the line. You couldn't have another Gavin situation on your hands.

But this felt entirely different. Even though you'd only spoken to Harry for a month, his absence from your life was more poignant than you expected it to be. When you ended things with Gavin, you felt guilty for hurting him, but ultimately, there was a sense of relief that you weren't leading him on, that crushing weight of his family's disapproval on your chest lifted. Breaking up with Gavin was hard, but it was the right thing to do for you, there was no doubt in your mind about that.

But this thing with Harry...you'd pushed him away when you were feeling vulnerable. A preemptive measure for the both of you, but there was no relief, no justifiable sense of rightness in your gut in the days following.

Part of you wanted to reach out to him and apologize, but you worried he hated you now and didn't know how to bridge the gap you created between the two of you.

Opportunity struck when you overheard a conversation between Harry and...Mitch. you were pretty sure that was Mitch from that night at Harry's house. It was about a week after you came back from your brother's house, and all three of them were constantly calling or texting despite their busy schedules. You wouldn't have put it past any of them to have set up times to routinely check in on you. It warmed your heart some, but nothing would feel right until you fixed things with Harry. Pushing him away had been a mistake, you saw that now. You'd done it in a moment when you were at your lowest, and that wasn't fair to either of you.

"I'm sorry, mate," Harry said to Mitch. "I didn't even think to ask if you were allergic before adopting a cat. I feel like an idiot now."

So he went ahead with his plan to get a pet, then. The thought made you smile, but you held it in. You were pressed into the corner of the elevator up to the studio. Harry was definitely aware of your presence, but he hadn't acknowledged you. Mitch gave you an awkward wave, but that was somehow worse.

"No worries, man," Mitch said now, stepping out of the elevator with Harry. He was in a white t-shirt and a light brown cardigan today, his curly brown hair looking beautifully windswept. You refused to think about the current state of your hair, which was hiding beneath a blue baseball cap. "I'll just have to—"

You never found out what Mitch would have to do because they rounded a corner of the hallway, leaving you alone outside the elevator. Quickly scurrying into your usual studio, you sat down at the grand piano, letting the smooth keys cool your sweaty palms. You felt breathless, but it wasn't the usual anxiety-ridden breathlessness you were used to. This felt different, your heart speeding up at the thought of Harry's broad shoulders beneath his sweater.

"Pull yourself together, Y/n," you told yourself.

The damage was done—once again, at your hands, but you couldn't help that right this second. Right now you had work to do.

The next day, you did something you didn't normally do—venture outside of your studio. Since working in the building, you'd never thought to explore the other rooms, to introduce yourself or make friends the way Harry had with you. As you walked down the long hallway of closed and half-open doors, you wondered who was behind them, what kind of projects were being worked on right now.

Most importantly, you wanted to know which door Harry sat behind.

After a day of writing, of trying to lean into more positive feelings, the small hope you had for a brighter future. You left the studio feeling lighter after another introspective session. There'll be happiness after you, but there was happiness because of you, both of these things can be true, you'd written, forming your thoughts around a melody that was both somber and hopeful. That moment when you'd pushed Harry away was the lowest you'd felt in a while, but you didn't want to feel that way anymore. All Harry had been asking for was friendship. You could do friendship, in fact, you craved it.

So now you were trying to make things right with Harry, or at least apologize for your rude text. He'd only ever been incredibly kind to you, and you'd treated him like garbage.

You came across a door that was partially open, laughter filtering out and reaching you in the hallway. Harry's voice was mixed among them, and hearing him laugh filled you with butterflies. Going to his studio suddenly felt like a mistake. You didn't want to bring down his mood, especially if it would affect his writing for the day.

But you finally worked up the courage to knock on the open door. You'd already made it this far. The knock immediately sobered up everyone inside the studio, and you waited outside with your gift bag clutched in your hands. One of Harry's friends appeared, eyes widening when he saw you there.

"Y/n," he said. "It's good to see you."

You couldn't tell if he was pleased to see you or not, and nerves slowly began to creep in.

"I—I won't take up too much of your time, I know y'all are probably busy," you said. "I just, um, could you give this to Harry, please?"

You shoved the bag in the man's direction, forcing him to take it. "You can come in. He's just inside—"

"No, it's okay. I should probably get back to it. So, uh, see you."

You turned and fled, heat flooding your cheeks. Honestly, you were surprised you made it that far. You figured your courage would fizzle out before knocking on the studio door.

Settling back in your studio, you pulled out your journal and phone out of your bag, and opened up to a fresh page to work on a new song. On the way into work this morning, your agent pitched you an opportunity to write for an up-and-coming artist. "Something light, Y/n," she'd said, knowing you'd been writing mostly sad, break-up songs recently. "If it doesn't work out, then it doesn't work out, but at least try. You've always liked to challenge yourself."

So you were putting away the Champagne problems for now and channeling your happiest thoughts. You even brought your computer to stream romantic comedies while you worked for some additional inspiration.

You were halfway through When Harry met Sally when that inspiration finally struck. Lighter, happier words finally filled your journal, a rare, but not completely uncommon occurrence. You'd written love songs in the past, both before and while you were with Gavin. But surprisingly, Gavin wasn't who came to mind, nor was it the characters in the movie on your computer.

You thought of Harry's smile, his flushed cheeks after he'd had a couple drinks, his green eyes that seemed to sparkle when he laughed. Did you have a crush on him? You weren't entirely sure, maybe you just admired his goodness. And, okay fine, his unfair amount of good looks too. But you tried not to focus too long on who exactly inspired you, just on making sure the words kept flowing onto the page.

Perhaps you should've expected Harry to stop by, but you hadn't. His voice startled you, your eyes having been glued to the screen of your computer as the final scene of Roman Holiday played out in front of you. It had always been one of your favorites, and you decided that a brain break was needed as the final third of the film rolled around.

"What's this?"

No matter how many times you'd seen it, the ending never failed to bring tears to your eyes. Seeing the glisten of tears in Gregory Peck's eyes as he stared longingly at Audrey Hepburn's, knowing they loved each other but could never be together was heartbreaking. It had been the most tragic thing you'd ever experienced when you first watched it as a girl, and it hadn't even happened to you.

It was those tears now that you wiped away, a warmth creeping up your cheeks because this was the second time Harry had caught you crying. How embarrassing.

Looking up, you saw the gift bag in one hand, the other in his pocket as he stared at you blankly. No warmth or his usual smile, but he wasn't glaring at you, either. He just looked indifferent, and that didn't sit well with you at all.

"I...I overheard you and Mitch talking about your cat and his allergies, and I'd heard of this stuff that you can use on your pets to help people who are allergic to animals."

You'd gone out and bought it after leaving the studio the day you'd overheard the conversation between Mitch and Harry. It was your version of an olive branch, a way to express your guilt after taking Harry's friendship and throwing it in his face. You were his friend, and you wanted him to know it.

It probably seemed silly to hide behind a gift instead of saying something, considering your profession. But confrontation was almost as terrifying as love was, it was part of the reason why you only wrote songs and didn't perform them.

Harry scoffed, and it looked like he couldn't decide between laughing or rolling his eyes. "No, I know what this is, I'm asking why you gave it to me. Or not me, to my friend and then scurried back over here."

"I'm sorry about that, about everything," you said, shutting your laptop and shifting in your chair. "I was...I haven't been in the best place for some time now. It's not an excuse for how I treated you that day. You caught me in a bad moment and I lashed out."

"Thank you for apologizing," he said, his voice cool and even. You desperately wanted to know what he was thinking. What he saw when he looked at you. "Do you want to grab coffee? Maybe we can talk?"

The thought of being open and honest in the way that he was suggesting was daunting, but Harry deserved your honesty. "Sure. Let me just pack up my things."

Harry waited for you by the door as you packed your bag, jotting a couple notes down in your journal before putting it away. Your hands shook a little as you approached him, excitement swelling in your belly despite the anxiety you felt at the prospect of having to talk about things you preferred to leave in the recesses of your mind. But it felt good to see Harry again, to walk beside him and head to your favorite coffee house.

Neither of you said anything on the short walk over, and even after you placed your orders, you remained quiet. When your name was called out alongside Harry's to grab your drinks, you knew it was time to find a table, but you stayed rooted to your spot in front of the counter.

It was Larissa. Gavin's sister. She was standing next to the other end of the counter where baristas called out and dropped off orders. There was a moment when she didn't see you, and you thought you could make a break for it, even if that meant leaving Harry high and dry. But even if you wanted to, you were frozen in place, and when Larissa's gaze finally landed on you, you felt her glare even from a short distance.

"Y/n?" Harry asked, both drinks in his hands. "What's—"

"Y/n! How good to see you!"

Larissa's kind smile was anything but. You'd never trusted Gavin's sister. From the moment you met her, you knew to be wary of her, and after everything that happened, you were sure nothing good was going to come out of this interaction.

"H—Hi, Larissa. How are you?" you said, trying your best not to look at Harry, who had a quizzical look on his face.

"Oh, I'm just fabulous. I've just spent the last year healing my brother's broken heart, which you broke like it was nothing," Larissa said. "He's great, by the way. Finally came to his senses and realized what a God-awful mess you were. He realized all of us were better off without you."

Then, before you could even make sense of what was happening, a rush of cold washed over you. At first, you thought it was merely a visceral reaction to the confrontation, but Harry's, "What the fuck?" made you think twice.

Looking down, you realized Larissa had poured her drink on your sweater. Shock left you blinking at Gavin's sister, tears welling in your eyes. With shaking hands, you held the ruined sweater in your hands, then back to Larissa. "Wh—Why—"

"That's for my brother, slut."

"That's enough," Harry said, voice harder and colder than you'd ever heard him before. Even when he was upset with you at the studio, he never sounded this angry. Gently gripping your elbow, he turned you around. You hardly noticed the flashing of cameras aimed in your direction. All you could really process was Larissa's smirk and the iced coffee dripping off you onto the coffee house's floor.

When you were finally outside and a block down the road, Harry pulled you down an alley where you could have a moment of privacy. He pulled his sweater over his head and offered it to you in a bundle. You quietly murmured your thanks and took it from him, slipping it over your head. The plain black sweater was warm and smelled like him—like laundry detergent and expensive cologne. It would've been the kind of thing to flood your senses if shame hadn't currently encompassed every fiber of your being.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," you said when you felt like you could speak without your voice trembling.

"You don't have to apologize for what happened, Y/n," Harry said. He gently rested his hand on your shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"I think so."

You couldn't look him in the eye, not while your iced coffee-ridden sweater was now ruining his, not while he kept looking at you with such pity. You could feel it down to your toes, and it made you want to curl up in a ball and never get out of bed. But Harry deserved an explanation. At the very least, he deserved to know who he associated himself with.

"I should explain—"

"You don't have to," Harry insisted.

"I want to," you said, believing the words as you said them. You weren't sure what you would've done if Harry hadn't been with you a few minutes ago. His brows were still furrowed with concern, his thumb rubbing circles into your shoulder. His sweater layered over yours created a pretty thick barrier, but you could feel his touch as if he was caressing your skin. "We can, um, we can go back to my place."

Thankfully, Harry didn't protest, just nodded quietly. The walk back to the studio was completely silent, leaving you alone with your thoughts until it was time to part ways. He got in his car and followed you home, silently following you up the steps to your apartment, a comfortable little one-bedroom twenty minutes from the studio.

Buddy was at the door when you unlocked it, tail wagging and tongue lolling to the side of his mouth happily. He greeted you first, then Harry, who he tried with all his might to knock over by getting up on his hind legs and resting on your guest. "Buddy! Down!" you hissed, frantically holding onto your dog's collar. Harry laughed and waived you off, surprising you by lifting Buddy up into his arms. Both boys were perfectly content, and the image of your friend holding your dog in your apartment was enough to lift your spirits the tiniest bit. A small smile crept onto your face, and Harry's grin widened when he saw it.

"Nice place," Harry commented, spinning around in a slow circle as he looked around.

"Thanks." Your apartment was small, but it was in a nice neighborhood and close to the beach. You made just enough in royalties to be comfortable in a little one bedroom. "Definitely different from my place in Nashville."

Harry nodded mildly before setting Buddy back down on the floor, admiring the colorful furniture that took up the space in your living room. Shivering a little, you looked down at yourself, reminded of your coffee-soaked clothes.

"There are treats in the pantry," you said, setting your things down on the kitchen counter and nodding to the pantry in question. "I'm just going to get changed so I can wash your sweater."

Harry nodded, but he seemed content to play with Buddy and look around your apartment, and your dog seemed perfectly happy to never walk on four legs ever again.

You tried to make quick work of changing, not wanting to keep Harry waiting too long. But you gave yourself a minute or two to calm down and process everything that had happened in the last hour. Even though it was horribly embarrassing, you were glad Harry had been there. He'd been a calming presence throughout, and you could only hope that would continue as you explained why you'd pushed him away.

*.*

"I...I didn't want to hurt you," you said, looking down at where your hands were knotted in your lap. "I just...I don't have a very good track record with relationships. Of any kind. I didn't want you to be one of the people I ruined."

Harry had been surprisingly quiet while you explained everything. And by everything, you meant everything. From Gavin to the Christmas party and what you'd heard to the would-be proposal. You told him about that song you'd written a couple weeks ago and how it brought all that emotion to the forefront of your memory and that it led you to push Harry away. He hadn't said much, asking you a few questions here and there; but for the most part, he let you speak uninterrupted, and you were surprised at how you continued to fill the silence, not once feeling uncomfortable. Perhaps a little ashamed after explaining how badly you'd hurt Gavin, but you never felt discomfort telling Harry any of it.

"Y/n, I—" Harry began to say before pausing. Looking up at him, you saw his brows furrowed, a look of consternation on his face. You waited for the blow, the one that eventually led him to leave you friendless once and for all. "I don't think you're a bad person for breaking up with him. I can't imagine that kind of hurt, sure, but if you didn't love him, you did the right thing. Do you—Do you seriously believe you're fucked in the head? Or that you ruin people?"

He was referencing the song you'd written, and you flushed bright red at the idea of him hearing more of the song than you would've liked. Shrugging, you gave him the truth. It didn't seem fit to lie when you'd bared your soul to him. "I don't know."

You could tell that answer didn't sit right with Harry. His frown deepened, and you desperately wanted to see him smile again. "Y/n, everyone makes mistakes in relationships, and even then I don't think you did anything wrong in that moment. Was it unfortunate timing? Maybe, but I don't think you should punish yourself for it anymore. In fact, I think what you did was brave."

"What?"

Smiling, Harry took your hand in his. It was warm, and his long fingers curled around your hand with ease. On any other day, you would've pulled back, but after sharing so much with him, this felt good. It felt right.

"I said what you did was brave," he said again. "You didn't love him, but you could've accepted the proposal and stayed with him. And then what? Leave him at the altar? Stay in a loveless marriage? It was hard, but you did the right thing for you and Gavin. I'm sure even he would come to understand that one day. Have you tried talking to him?"

You shook your head. "He hates me now."

"I don't think anyone could really hate you, Y/n," Harry said quietly, a blush crawling up his cheeks as if he hadn't meant to say that out loud. "I know you might disagree, but I think you might feel a lot better about all of this if you talked to him."

"His family—"

"Fuck his family. Gavin is a grown man who can think for himself," Harry said. "If he can't separate their wrong opinions from his own thoughts, then he's an idiot who never deserved you anyway."

You laughed a little at the first half of what he said. It felt nice to know that someone was on your side. Squeezing Harry's hand, you said, "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For listening, for being a good friend when I maybe didn't deserve it. Evan's the only person I talked to about this, and even then I didn't explain everything," you said. Evan had been on your side, but it didn't really count to you. He was your brother. He had to be on your side. "I just don't have the best track record when it comes to hurting people, you know?"

Your eyes had fallen to your hand, which was still curled around his, but to your surprise, Harry's other one lifted your chin to meet his gaze. With wide eyes, you looked at him, heart beating a little wilder in your chest when you saw the look on his face. His expression was wide open, earnest and endearing, and filled with...something you weren't ready to see yet. But it filled you with warmth, and for the first time in a long time, you really believed that you didn't have to be alone.

"I don't think you'll hurt me," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

His hand pushed a strand of your hair away from your face, tucking it behind your ear. The movement made your breath hitch, lips parting as you tried to decide what Harry was going to do next, what you wanted him to do next. He seemed like he was waiting for something too, and his gaze was finally too much, like he could see your soul and was currently shuffling through every little thing you longed for and were afraid of. It was heavy with emotion, and you weren't ready for it.

"You should probably get going soon," you said, rising, with great difficulty, to your feet and putting some distance between yourself and Harry. A frown on Harry's face appeared, and you quickly explained yourself. "Your cat. You probably should head home and feed her."

Before you and Harry sat down to talk about...everything, he briefly mentioned his new kitten, Sweet Pea. "It was the name she already had when I adopted her, and it didn't feel right to change it, though sometimes she's not so sweet." She was a fluffy Ragdoll cat that was apparently quite the diva, and Harry proudly showed off picture after picture, claiming he was already in love with his new furry companion.

Now though, Harry's eyes widened as if he hadn't even thought about his new kitten since being here. "Right. Good call. I'll see you tomorrow?"

You nodded as you watched him gather his things. "I'll return the sweater tomorrow."

"Don't worry about it," he said with a dismissive wave of his hand.

You walked Harry to the door to see him out. He crossed the threshold but paused before heading down to his car. You couldn't read the look that crossed his face, but his lingering gave you one last opportunity to take him all in. The muscles in his arms bulged beneath the white t-shirt he wore, and his hair had grown a tad longer since you'd spoken to him last, now curling around the nape of his neck and touching the collar of his shirt. Harry was taller than you, but not by much, though standing this close, it felt like he was a whole foot taller as you craned your neck to look at him.

Then, before you could ask if he'd forgotten something, he leaned forward. It took you a moment to realize what he'd done, but the lingering traces of heat on your forehead helped. He'd kissed you. On the forehead.

"See you tomorrow!"

Harry was gone in a flash, leaving you standing at the front door of your apartment with an open mouth as you tried to decide what his forehead kiss meant. To you, it felt sisterly, and you couldn't help the disappointment that swirled in your gut. You quickly pushed that feeling away, closing the door on whatever happened just then.

*.*

For the next few weeks, everything felt like it was back to normal. Better than normal, even. Despite the awkwardness you felt at having to see Harry after the odd forehead kiss, Harry acted like it never happened, which you were thankful for. You wouldn't have known what to say if he'd brought it up. Or tried to do it again.

But it became clear, despite the teeny tiny budding feelings you might have had for him, that he merely saw you as a friend. After your long talk with him at your apartment, Harry began showing you some of the work he'd been doing in his own studio down the hall from yours. It appeared he was getting over a break up too, though you never would've guessed by how cheerful he was most days. He still was, even as he explained a little about his most recent relationship, and you realized that while you hid your true emotions behind a wall, he might've been hiding behind his happy disposition. It made you want to dig deeper, to see what lay beneath all that "fineness."

As you spent more time with Harry, you also began hanging out with his friends. The first time you returned to his house for another game night, everyone seemed genuinely happy to see you, namely Sylvia. "I'm so glad you're spending more time with H," she'd said that night. "I love him to death but he's a clingy motherfucker when he's lonely."

That thought made you laugh. You recalled a conversation you'd had with Harry a while back when he'd said his friends were "disgustingly in love." He seemed like the kind of guy who loved love, but you also didn't want Sylvia, or any of his friends, to get the wrong idea.

"Oh I don't—I mean we're not—I don't think he sees me that way."

That wasn't how you wanted to explain yourself, seeing as you weren't even sure if you saw him that way. But Sylvia must have seen your flushed cheeks and understood your floundering because she smiled at you warmly.

"I think this calls for a girl's day. What do you think?"

"Oh. Um..." You didn't expect any of Harry's friends to want to hang out with you one on one, but you'd been leaning into trying new things lately. And girl's day? You grew up with three brothers, the last time you had anything resembling that was a tea party Hayden and Evan threw for you when you were six. "Sure. I could meet you for lunch this week if you'd like."

"Lunch sounds perfect."

A couple days passed until you had Buddy on his leash, walking down to the cafe you and Sylvia agreed on. You were a little nervous, but mostly excited. It had been a while since you'd hung out casually with a friend—you weren't counting Harry—and while you'd grown accustomed to the loneliness, you couldn't help but acknowledge that it felt nice to talk to someone other than your dog.

"Okay," Sylvia said once the waiter walked away with your orders. She'd held off asking about Harry, but now the time had come. "Hit me. What did Harold do?"

"Nothing," you said, perhaps a little too quickly. When Sylvia pinned you with a stare, you looked down at your glass of water. "He just...He gave me a kiss? On the forehead? And I don't know, it just read very...brotherly."

Sylvia sighed, which at the very least vindicated your feelings. It wasn't like you wanted anything more, but the whole thing left you feeling confused. A cheek kiss would've been easier to navigate, but the forehead? It left Y/n thinking about Harry more than she should've.

"Okay, I can see where you might be confused by that, but as someone with a brother, I can confidently say they don't do shit like that."

You weren't sure what you expected her to say, or what you even wanted her to say, but it wasn't that. Sylvia knew Harry fairly well, so it was safe to say that she was telling the truth, you just weren't ready to accept what she was implying.

"I do too, and I know the last thing I would expect from any of my brothers is a kiss on the forehead, but I don't know," you said, trying to remain as neutral as possible knowing Sylvia could report back to Harry. This whole thing was starting to feel very grade school-esque.

"Just know that Harry's a pretty open guy, but he's been burned in the past so he might be a little closed off or not be as inclined to make the first move," Sylvia said, though in some ways it sounded like a warning. "He's the greatest guy you'll ever meet, and whatever you decide, just be gentle, okay?"

It was hard to imagine someone as positive and happy as Harry having a dark past, but it sounded like there was a lot more than what met the eye as far as he was concerned. It was honestly a little comforting to know that he wasn't perfect. You were such a mess sometimes it seemed unfair that people wandered through life seemingly unscathed. You knew that was rarely ever the case, but sometimes it was hard to remember when guys like Harry walked around embracing life and had smiles for every occasion.

"I will," you promised, and you meant it. You were pretty sure nothing was going to happen between you and Harry, but you could appreciate Sylvia looking out for her friend. As nice as she had been to you so far, she was Harry's friend first. Her words made you wonder if you would ever have friends so fiercely loyal to you.

After that lunch with Sylvia, the weeks began to pass by in a blur. There were days when you saw Harry frequently, and then you wouldn't see him at all. He would show up at your studio to get coffee—at a new coffee shop, of course—you stopped by his to bring him and his friends baked goods, and sometimes you would end the night at one another's houses, a bottle of wine and takeout split between the two of you. You weren't dating, at least you wouldn't categorize whatever it was that you were doing as dating, but it felt nice to have someone in your life consistently again, and you liked that Harry was that person even more.

That didn't mean you couldn't read the signs. Sometimes Harry's gaze would linger when he thought you didn't notice, or he would sit a lot closer than was maybe necessary when you hung out with his friends. Sometimes his hand would brush yours as you watched a movie as if he wanted to hold it, and yours would brush back encourgingly, and then suddenly you were holding hands. To anyone else, it might have appeared confusing—in fact, Sylvia had vocalized her confusion over the non-relationship you and Harry were engaging in—but for you, not acknowledging what was happening and not putting any labels or definitions on this thing happening between the two of you was somehow easier to swallow. And since Harry seemed to be following your lead, he didn't say anything to object.

It was around Christmastime that things began to change. You'd spent your morning writing a song for an artist's Christmas album, a feat you'd managed to avoid in the past. But since you'd worked with the artist before and liked the vision she had for this album, you decided to at least try to write a holiday song. It wasn't necessarily that you disliked Christmas or the holidays, you were just indifferent to the season in question, and after everything that transpired two years ago now, you just never felt like celebrating much.

Harry Styles, however, was a huge fan of Christmas. his studio was decked out with lights and garlands, he got him and Sweet Pea matching sweaters, which you weren't entirely sure if he knitted or not, and he'd been bugging you since Thanksgiving to come over to decorate cookies. He'd finally worn you down and you were going over later tonight, but not before putting in a couple hours at the studio, which turned into sitting in on one of Harry's sessions.

It didn't happen often, but you did like seeing the team approach to writing songs as opposed to your usual solitary method. For the most part, you watched as Harry bounced ideas off his friends, observing as they focused on one chord progression or verse until something else stole their attention away. It was a bit chaotic, but everyone in the room seemed to be having fun.

It was in the middle of a heated debate between another fun, upbeat song or beginning to work on a ballad when the melody came to you. It was just piano chords, and had you been in your own studio, you would've immediately sat down to play it and see where it went. But this wasn't your studio, and it wasn't your session, and while you knew no one would've minded hearing your input, you felt nervous all of a sudden, self-conscious.

So instead, you pulled some blank sheet music out and began to scribble, writing as quickly as possible before the melody escaped you. The melody had taken up so much space in your head that everything else faded away. You envisioned arrangements, themes, a line or two sprouting as you wrote down the next note. Something sad and somber, the exact opposite of what Harry had been pushing for since he entered the studio.

"What am I now?" you wrote on the back of the sheet music. You didn't know how it would fit, but it would. You could tinker with the words later, so long as all your thoughts were written down somewhere, you would find a way to make it happen.

"What are you working on over there?"

Harry was suddenly at your side, and when he peeked over your shoulder, you didn't try to hide your frenzied notes. You handed them over, unsure if he even read sheet music. "It was just a thought I had. I can play it for you if you'd like?"

"Please," Harry said, gesturing to the piano in the corner of the room. It was then that you realized that everyone else had left the room at some point or another. At your questioning glance, Harry explained. "Ten minute break, but it felt like you were onto something...And I figured you'd be more willing to share if it wasn't in front of a group."

"Thank you," you said, those pesky butterflies swirling around in your stomach. They seemed to appear any time Harry so much as smiled at you. "It's just a melody, really, but maybe you can use it for something.

You sat down at the piano, eyes widening when Harry sat down beside you. Shaking it off, you focused on the piano, the keys cool and smooth to the touch, a familiar feeling that felt nice among such a different work setting. You explained your thought process to Harry a little bit, telling him the direction you hoped the song would go in and possible arrangements for it and whatnot. Harry, who apparently knew you better than you thought he did, nudged you with his elbow and encouraged you to play, knowing that you were stalling.

It wasn't that you were unsure of yourself or your talent. You knew you were good at what you did. You'd collaborated on multiple albums and worked with many well-known artists and bands, or artists who were just breaking out onto the scene and did so with the help of your songwriting. The difference here was that you normally didn't play an idea for anyone until it was fully realized. You typically sent over demos and typed up lyrics, and Harry would be one of the first to hear something that you'd only just come up with. Besides Buddy, but he didn't really count.

Taking a deep breath, you began to play, letting the chords you'd only just come up with pull your focus. After having played through it a couple times, you looked over at Harry, who had a faraway look in his eyes, an idea of his own forming in his head, perhaps.

"It's fairly simple, but I think that's what's rather beautiful about it," you said while still playing. "Sometimes you don't need much to get a response from someone, and I think a melody like this really allows an artist to shine, you know? Whether that's through their lyrics, or their vocal range, or both. And obviously it can be changed to a different key, this is just the one I wrote down, but...yeah, that's what I've got."

You finally stopped playing to hear Harry's opinion, though you wished you hadn't. Now your hands didn't really know what to do, and it took a lot of effort to keep them knotted together in your lap. Harry still looked pensive, as if he hadn't even heard your rambling, though now you were even more curious to know what he thought.

"Harry?"

Blinking, Harry turned toward you, his knee bumping against yours on the piano bench. His eyes cleared up as he remembered he wasn't alone in the studio. "Hm? Sorry, just thinking."

Offering him your pen and a fresh page in your journal, you said, "Did you maybe want to write it down?"

After that, you and Harry wrote hundreds of songs together. At least it felt like a hundred songs. Whether it was in the studio, or at each other's homes—mainly his because he had a home studio and a guest room for when sessions went too long—the two of you were almost always writing together. It wasn't always for his album, either. Sometimes Harry would help you with projects you were working on for other artists, or you would just write songs for the sake of writing them.

And it just worked. It felt like you and Harry just clicked. He was able to vocalize what you were trying to say to his producer, and you knew what he was thinking before he said it or the sound he was going for based off a couple descriptors. You'd never known someone so intimately before, or understood them so completely, Not even Gavin.

Harry was witty and smart and kind and genuine. He felt things deeply, and kept a lot of his darkest secrets and deepest insecurities incredibly close to his chest. You realized at some point that he was even more guarded than you in some ways. As you wrote together more and more, you obviously realized that there was more than met the eye when it came to your friend, but outside of songwriting, he wouldn't divulge much. He'd been through a breakup recently, that much you could tell, and while you wanted to know more, you respected his privacy and the desire to leave the past exactly where it was. Unless it came to the music, of course.

"So...you're what? Friends without all the benefits?" Sylvia asked you.

You met with her pretty regularly now for lunch during the week. Harry wasn't typically the topic of conversation, but on this occasion, Sylvia was giving you the third degree.

"We're co-workers. And friends," you added as an afterthought. Saying you were merely co-workers didn't seem right to you anymore, and you knew Harry would be upset if you thought otherwise. "I don't know what other benefits I would need outside of his companionship."

"Bull. Shit." Sylvia pinned you with a stare that made you blush. "Last weekend he had you practically sitting in his lap, and you're trying to tell me nothing's going on?"

"Not really. I don't think either of us are in a place to be in a relationship right now." It was the same line you fed to Andrew last week when you went to see one of his games. He thankfully bought it, or maybe he was just used to you keeping your love life to yourself, but Sylvia wasn't having it.

"What makes you say that?"

You shrugged. "I mean I'm definitely not, and I can just tell he's not there yet either. I mean, obviously, I've learned about his most recent relationship by working with him, but outside of that, he doesn't tell me anything. I don't even know her name."

You weren't offended that Harry didn't want to share about his ex. You wouldn't have told him about Gavin if you hadn't been put in that particular situation. But you understood better than most about that kind of pain. Maybe he wasn't ready. Maybe his feelings were getting all jumbled up between the past and the present. Or maybe he just didn't like you that way. The last theory hurt more than you cared to admit, but you were more scared of another potential relationship going up in flames than finding out the truth, so you decided ignorance really was bliss.

Sylvia nodded, understanding. You realized she must've known his ex, though you didn't ask for details. That was Harry's story to tell, not hers, and you were pretty sure Sylvia would say the same if you did ask. "I guess that's fair. But so, you're just...friends who kiss occasionally?"

You nearly choked on your sip of water. "What? No! Of course not. We don't—We—"

"Let me save you the struggle of coming up with an unconvincing lie," Sylvia said. "I've seen you."

"When?"

"Christmas party," she said, raising one finger as if she was about to list a few occurences.

"That was mistletoe. It was innocent," you said with a dismissive wave of your hand, even though said hand was suddenly clammy.

"New Year's."

"Everyone kisses at the end of the countdown!"

"At game night when he kissed your neck?"

"Why are you paying that close attention to my neck?"

"And," Slyvia said, pointedly ignoring your last remark. "I have it on good authority that Harry kissed you at the studio last week. Don't try to hide it, Y/n."

Sighing, you said, "So what's your point, exactly?"

"My point is that y'all are just pretending you're not in a relationship when you are!" she said, looking at you as if you had two heads. "Look, it's clear you've been through some shit and Harry has too, I won't deny that. But are you really going to put your happiness on the back burner because of it?"

Your cheeks burned at having been caught. It wasn't like you'd planned to kiss Harry any of those times. Each kiss came as a surprise, leaving you more and more breathless than the last and hopeful for another. What Sylvia didn't know was that you and Harry had kissed a lot more than the handful that she'd rattled off. Sometimes when it was late and you were over at his house working, he'd get this look in his eyes that would turn your whole body molten. He'd lean in close, nudge your nose with his, and then his lips were on yours and time suddenly didn't exist.

You liked kissing Harry. A lot. You liked the way his fingers gingerly held your jaw, you liked that kissing him gave you free rein to touch him wherever you wanted—his hair, his arms, beneath his shirt. Sometimes it felt like you couldn't get enough, but it always ended with one of you pulling away under the guise that it was getting late. Your lips would tingle long after, and you'd text Harry late at night when you should've been asleep, or he would call to talk about whatever he was thinking.

To anyone else, it wouldn't make sense, but it made sense to you and Harry. There was no pressure to be more, no urgency to define what you were doing, and that seemed to work for both of you.

"I'm perfectly happy right now," you said, and you were.

It had been a long time since you'd felt this content. Your breakup with Gavin left you feeling guilty and ashamed. And deep down, you knew you already felt more for Harry than you did for your ex, and that made you feel horrible too. Part of you still felt you were being greedy by trying to be this happy, that you should just take what you were given and try not to press your luck.

Sylvia took you by surprise by taking your hand. Her fingers were warm and reassuring, just as her eyes were when you finally met her gaze. It was safe to say now that she was your friend. She'd come over to your house multiple times for wine and movie nights, you went out to bars together, you'd met her partner, who was the absolute sweetest person on the planet. You valued Sylvia's friendship, and you valued her as a person. You didn't want to lose her if things with Harry progressed and fizzled out.

"It's okay to want more, Y/n," she said gently.

It was like she saw through all the bullshit and realized what you were really scared of. Harry was the only person who knew everything regarding your past relationship, but you told Sylvia bits and pieces. When you'd told her that you broke up with Gavin the night he wanted to propose, she didn't judge you, or ask why you'd throw away a perfectly good relationship. She was empathetic, and said she was sorry you had to go through that. It felt good to confide in someone who was willing to hear your side of the story, to have them realize if you could've loved Gavin the way he loved you, you would've.

"Maybe," you said. "But like I said, I'm not the only one who has shit to work through."

Sylvia nodded, letting the subject drop. But the words she'd said, It's okay to want more, needled at your brain the rest of the day.

*.*

"You should come with me."

You had been watching Sweet Pea doze contentedly on top of Buddy, who was curled in a ball on his dog bed. The two of them were an unlikely pair, but they'd gotten along great the first time they were introduced, and now you found it adorable any time they napped together.

Harry's voice was low and scratchy in your ear, as if he wasn't too far off from sleep himself. You were huddled together under a blanket on your couch, watching the credits roll on the second movie of the night, but you hadn't paid much attention to anything since the moment Harry pulled you to his chest and tucked his chin in the crook of your neck, peppering your skin with kisses as his thumbs rubbed circles beneath your shirt.

"What?" you asked, not having really heard him. It seemed impossible, but every day his touch became more and more dizzying.

"To Japan. You should come with me," he said. "It would be like a writing retreat."

Harry had mentioned his impromptu trip to Japan over dinner. He seemed excited about it, of getting out of town for a little while and just being alone with his thoughts. Those were his words, though now he was inviting you along.

"I don't even have a passport," you said, a non-answer, as Harry would call it.

"We'll get you one," he said. "Don't you think it would be fun to explore a new city together? Just the two of us?"

"W—What about Buddy?"

"Buddy can come to," Harry said, like it was all just so easy.

You thought back to your conversation with Sylvia a week ago. It's okay to want more, she'd said. At the time, you were content with this thing you and Harry were doing. It was simple and easy and pressure-free. A couple weeks later her words still nagged you. You hadn't mentioned wanting more to Harry, but this was different. This was...big. Appearing nonchalant didn't make it so.

"What are we?" you found yourself asking, hating how cliche the question was, even if you did need the answer all of a sudden.

"What do you mean?" Harry asked, but you knew he was too smart to not understand.

Still, you sat up and faced him, forcing him to sit on the other side of the couch to have a proper conversation. "I meant exactly what I said, H. What—What are we doing here exactly?"

Harry's face flushed, the muscles in his arm flexing as he rubbed his neck. "I...I don't know. I thought we were okay with not really defining it."

Not defining it, or not talking about it? you thought, even though that wasn't really fair. You were just as content not to ask as he was until now. Or a few weeks ago, you couldn't exactly tell when you began to want more, or when wanting more stopped scaring you.

"I know, but now you're asking me to drop everything and fly to Japan for...for how long exactly?"

Harry shrugged, and your jaw ticked. "A couple months?"

"A couple months," you repeated, trying to align your thoughts. All you could hear though was, It's okay to want more. Taking a deep breath, you said, "I think...I think if I'm going to follow someone across the world for a couple months, I would like a definition about what it is we're doing."

"It's a writing retreat, Y/n. We would be working on songs. Just like we've always done."

You weren't sure when you became the brave one. Perhaps it was your conversation with Sylvia bolstering your confidence, or maybe it was Harry's reluctance to acknowledge the situation at hand, you weren't sure, but his reply wasn't enough. Not nearly enough.

"I'd have to find my own hotel," you said. "Or an apartment to rent I guess."

"You'd stay with me obviously," Harry said, and you had to resist the urge to take him by the shoulders and shake him until he started seeing your perspective.

"Co-workers don't live together, H."

"But we're not just co-workers, Y/n. We're—"

Your brows raised, encouraging him to finish, but he ended up shaking his head. Running a tired hand over his face, he said, "I understand what you mean, but I can't...I can't give that to you right now."

You nodded, then stood up. "And I can't go to Japan without it."

It hurt, but at least he was being upfront about how he felt. It wasn't really fair of you to ask for more when both of you had been content to keep things simple. But somewhere down the line, you realized you liked Harry. A lot. You were okay with leaving your history with Gavin in the past, and you wanted to look to the future now. You'd thought that the future might include a relationship with Harry, but he wasn't ready, and you weren't sure if you wanted to wait. So much of the last two years had been waiting, hiding. Now you needed more. You craved it.

You felt like you were in some kind of alternate universe. One where Harry was scared and unsure of himself and unable to admit to what he wanted. You wanted more, and you weren't going to settle for anything less. You wanted to be more than his friend whom he kissed sometimes, you wanted to hear his scratchy voice as he woke up beside you, and you knew he did too, but something was holding him back. You'd spent too much time hiding from life and love to hide with him some more. Part of you wanted to, just because it was Harry, and you cared about him a lot, but a bigger part of you knew what you deserved, and it was okay to acknowledge that.

"I understand," he said, standing up with you.

Both of you were quiet as he gathered his things. You watched his broad shoulders shrug into his coat, the lean frame of his body bend down to put Sweet Pea in her little carrier. You felt the loss of him already, and he hadn't even gone yet, but you could feel the wall going up between the two of you. Both of you were guarded in your own ways, and both of you had been as vulnerable as you could be, but it wasn't enough.

"When are you planning on leaving?" you asked as you walked him to the door.

"Couple weeks," he said. "Just have to get the logistics figured out."

Nodding, you stepped into his offered embrace, letting yourself inhale the scent of his cologne and feel his arms around you for the last time for a while. His nose bumped yours in a move that was so familiar it made your heart squeeze. You weren't sure how long you stood like that, kissing until you couldn't breathe, it was only until Buddy's wet nose nudged the two of you apart that you finally stepped away from him. Harry bent down to scratch your dog's head and let him lick his cheek a few times before straightening back up. He was about to turn and leave when you called his name.

"I don't know what happened," you said, swallowing around the lump in your throat. "If you did something or if she did something to make you so...closed off, and from one heavily guarded person to another, I'm sorry that it happened and that it made you this way. I hope you find whatever it is you're looking for in Japan."

Harry grinned, but it wasn't wide enough to show his dimples. Without saying a word, he left, head bent as he walked down the hall, taking a piece of you with him.

Buddy nudged your leg, pulling away from the hall Harry already disappeared down. Your dog's eyes were big and curious and completely unaware of what was wrong, which brought a watery smile to your face. "Come on, bubba. Let's get ready for bed."

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