#i think amanda was in that? my memory is so bad

[fictional-worlds-are-exquisite]

i just finished reading the shadow friend by alex north and i'm fucking reeling over here

[simp-ly-writes]

The Comments Section (pt.8)

─────── · · A Social Media AU Fic

Pairing: Spencer Agnew x gn!Reader

─ · · SUMMARY: after taking some time away from the spotlight, you return to surprise friends and fans alike with your more recent updates...

─ · · TAGS: gender-neutral pronouns, slowburn, fluff, light angst, cheesiness, friends that act like lovers, friends to lovers, mutual pining, attempt at humour, social media au.

─ · · MASTERLIST | TAGLIST REQUEST | PART SIX | PART SEVEN | PART NINE

─ · · A/N: can't believe its been over a month since the last update, sorry about that y'all 😬 but hope you enjoy this part!

─────── · ·

🔔 (name)s_username just posted for the first time in awhile.

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Liked by co_mill, spennser, sydney_sweeney, and others

(name)s_username Hey... so it's been awhile. I've taken time away from the internet and from the cameras to focus on myself and on my relationships and in that time I realized how far I was pushing myself and other's away from me.

I will be taking a step away from my on-screen role(s) at Smosh since it is not fair to you, the fans or to anyone working at Smosh to work around my schedule. I will try and make guest appearances if I can and I'm sorry if I ever got your hopes up for things to go back to where they started but I hope that at least some of you will come out to support my new projects and I understand fully if you cannot.

Thank you to my team, my friends at Smosh, Sydney and Glen, and to Spencer for always being there for me. I know that I have not been myself these past few months but I think I'm finally finding what I need so stay tuned for a more happy update later lol.

Love you all!

View all 7,342 comments

username01 Always supported you and always will, (name)! Hope you find what you're looking for 💕

co_mill gonna miss having you, bestie! But I can already see how much happier you are and that makes me happy! 😊

↳ (name)s_username you're so sweet. I'll miss you too, bestie! 🥹🫶

username44 eh, still does not make up for everything. I felt like you used Spencer and Smosh to make your "career."

username70 Mixed feeling about this but wishing you the best!

anthonypadilla your dads are here to give you a virtual hug goodbye, so here it is!

↳ ian_hecox yeah, best hug you ever had here: ↳ (name)s_username I can feel it! 🤣

username22 I don't know about you, but I'm feeling dust in my eyes! I'm sad to see (name) go but if they can be like an Olivia or Keith- I can live with that ❤️

angelagiovanagiarratana wait so you're LEAVING? WTF GUYS why does nobody ever tell me anything?!? Like good for you bestie, you get that mental health back on track but seriously? I had to come here from twitter to learn this 😭

↳ (name)s_username Girl! I left you a voice memo yesterday 👀 ↳ angelagiovanagiarratana oh shit, I thought that was spam 😬 ↳ username30 OMG LMAO!!! 🤣

username88 I was so worried about you! Happy to know you're back on the up and up again 💕

shayne_topp you're gonna kill it out there but you'll always have a seat at smosh cast to tell me and Amanda all about it!

↳ (name)s_username give me a month or two and I will be there lol ↳ shayne_topp counting on it!

filmingamanda happy post you say? 😉

tomeybones who's gonna cry with my in the bathroom now??

spennser 🫶

↳ (name)s_username 🫶

─────── · ·

🔔 SmoshGames just uploaded! Turn off notifications here.

─────── · ·

Thank you (Name)!

Smosh Games ✓ [Subscribed] 👍 4k | 👎 7.75M subscribers 1.1M views 2 days ago #2 on trending a complication of (name) moments from over the years... click to expand

5,992 Comments

⚲ Pinned by Creator Smosh Games ✓ From a decade of on and off-camera shenanigans, everyone here at Smosh wishes (name) the very best! (even though we are jealous others get to work with them too). Be sure to comment your favourite memory/moment of (name)!

username01 this feels like a bad break-up since you're still in love with them lol 😭

↳ username61 you know that this is going to happen with everyone one day but you never expect today. fuck i'm going to miss them. * [this comment has been censored for interfering with Youtube's Community Guidelines; for more information press HERE]

username30 everyone is out here acting like they died. PEOPLE (NAME) IS GOING TO COME BACK FOR SPECIALS DONT WORRY! god.

username24 I still think back to that hide and seek video, I hope that future update comfirms (yourshipname) for good!

username77 "don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened"

username11 (name) falling over and accidentally discovering what is cake by face plant will never not be the best moment on this channel 🤣

username40 where are all the "#imdonewith(name)" people now?? Sure to have changed their tune quickly...

(yourshipname)updates ✓ any moment with (name) and Spencer is a certified classic for Smosh. I mean they are the Shayne and Courtney of nerds.

username09 I was so scared that (name) was going to fall into that Hollywood lifestyle... happy yo know that they're still there.

username52 "this isn't goodbye, it's see you later" - and I'm counting on it for (name)'s return!

─────── · ·

🔔 (name)s_username just posted, check it out!

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Liked by spennser, ian_hecox, tomeybones and others

(name)s_username good company, 9/10, could have talked more about movies but was too caught up on video games. idk if I would recommend for anyone else 😬

View all 3,229 comments

username01 (name) be having the most aesthetic blog possible in this new era and I'm here for it 💕

spennser decided to take out the image of my soul-crushing win?

↳ (name)s_username no! I left it in right beside you almost face planting if you scroll to the left 😄 ↳ spennser ☹️ ↳ (name)s_username 😂 ↳ username40 I seriously cannot tell if this is a soft launch or them just being dumbasses again...

username80 just two friends spending casual friend time together... right? right? right? 👀

damien_Hass why wasn't I invited??? you know how much I love bowling!

↳ (name)s_username next time 100%!

filmingamanda I think I used to work in a bowling alley... then again maybe it was mini golf place. Anyways cute pictures!!

username30 eh, I'll count this as a win for (yourshipname).

username00 WHY ARE WE ALL SO CALM, THIS IS A SOFT LAUNCH PEOPLE. A. SOFT. LAUNCH. You heard it here first, folks!

username11 waiting on Spencers post now to confirm it but AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH. Has the angst finally stopped for some fluff???

username16 Love how all the regular comments are being stationed at the top for us shippers to be down in the trenches analyzing every image.

username19 " idk if I would recommend for anyone else..." mhmm yup, you take that man!

─────── · ·

🔔 This post is getting a lot of likes! Check it out!

─────── · ·

Liked by (name)s_username, anthonypadilla, filmingamanda and others

spennser do the math- the answer's probably right.

View all 7,002 comments

(name)s_username so lets see here, college meet-up + years working together - a few years and months apart x some texts = ...

↳ spennser I mean I would format it a bit differently but I came to the same conclusion 🤷 ↳ username60 now they are just playing with us, what is this curelty??!?! Spit. it. out. already. please!

username24 so the answer I got was "and then they kissed," am I right?

username00 I've always hated math.

↳ tomeybones fuck! someone already took my caption!

co_mill the math is mathing so hard rn.

shayne_topp so... beopordy (math edition) next?

username01 only real fans will remember that 1st picture 🫶

filimgamanda I've never felt older in a comment's section till now, WTF is a "soft launch"

↳ ian_hecox ummm, its when Nasa tries to send off something or something like that ↳ filimgamanda oh, okay! ↳ username40 its like watching two robots communicate with one another 😭 ↳ username10 not another Harambe situation again!!

username43 Alexa? please order me another three bottles of wine. we're gonna need them...

─────── · ·

─ · · A/N: only two more parts to go!

─ · · SPENCER AGNEW TAGLIST: @lisiliely @missflufffanfics @little-stitious-studios @thejourneyneverendsx @sibsteria @lizzylynch1 @babble2 @delaneyburghardt @thevintagefangirl @uniquely-haunting @maricarorp @sarahskywalker-amidala @laurasdrey

[maddy-k-reads-all-day]

I'm starting to agree a bit with people's interpretation of Wooly being that he tries to stay on script. In "Play My Way" (which I'm 99% sure is canon since it's an official Amanda 2 song and listed in the Amanda 2 game credits) Wooly's verse goes "Now watch us play our part, now watch us dance and sing, don't let it break your heart just play along and don't-" (before getting cut off by Amanda). So I do think he tries to stay on script a bit.

Though I don't think it's out of malicious intent. I think Wooly is just more avoidant about everything. Like, he doesn't like to think much about their situation since, to be fair, it's pretty upsetting.

Eventually, I'll have a full Amanda and Wooly analysis complete with quotes and clips but for now I'll just share the gist of this personal theory I'm working on. Basically, I think a big part of this has to do with memories. I don't think Amanda and Wooly remember everything from before, and it's possible in the beginning they remembered nothing at all.

Spoilers ahead:

For one thing, in the first game, Amanda only reacts to the name "Sam" in the context of the father chicken. In the second game she reacts to it a lot more and seems to know what happened to him, so I think it's safe to say she remembers that much now. I think the first game was Amanda slowly remembering more and more and trying to prompt us to go off script so we could jog her memory a bit more.

I don't even think she remembers everything in the second game. It's possible there is still more she doesn't recall, but at this point, it seems like she doesn't want to talk about it. Even when Wooly wasn't around, if we mentioned Hameln or the butcher, she immediately shuts down. She's telling us pretty clearly that she wants out, though.

Which is why I found it interesting in the librarian tape when Kate couldn't even confirm if Amanda wanted out of the tapes. She was certain it was Rebecca, but she couldn't tell where she was coming from. I think Kate started the process of Amanda getting her memories back, or maybe she sped it up by mentioning names and things that Rebecca would know, jogging Amanda's memory over time just like we did.

But here's the thing, all of this probably jogged Wooly's memory too.

I see it as a "would you rather be told an inconvenient truth or a comforting lie" situation. Amanda wants the truth, but Wooly would rather live a lie.

I mean, the truth is clearly something that is painful, sad, and scary. Once Amanda learns it, she says in the Goodnight tape that she tries not to think about it. But Amanda knew these memories were upsetting and wanted them back anyway. She doesn't seem to regret knowing the truth. But I think Wooly would've rathered all this stay forgotten. Sad and scary things make him uncomfortable, as we learn in the "when you feel bad" tape when you answer "tragedy" or "horror". I think he tries to avoid them in general.

Another thing, Amanda wants us to know what happened to her. That's abundantly clear in the second game. Personally, I think she was the one who helped us find the secret tapes. She sprinkled little hints throughout the tapes to let us. She might not have known excatly what was on those tapes, but she clearly knows that they have something to do with what happened to her. There could've been some research on Wooly too, but we just never found it. I mean, Amanda doesn't excatly like Wooly and she's kinda desperate for us to know the truth about what happened to her so... she probably wouldn't be too eager to share about Wooly.

What I'm trying to say is: the reason we never learn about Wooly is because Wooly doesn't want to know the truth, and by extension has no interest in us finding it. My guess is that Wooly would much rather just forget and have things return to how they were in like the Hide and Seek Pilot, for instance.

Which, let me remind you is canon.

Basically, my guess is Wooly would rather things go back to how they were when they didn't remember. Staying on script and never questioning anything because the answers to those questions are painful.

Edit: I'd also like to mention that Sheep symbolizes FOLLOWERS. Something that fits Wooly to a T. He's not the "bad guy" he's simply the bystander, which doesn't make him a good person but it also doesn't make him a villain.

It's late, I'm tired idk if I'm even making sense. Had to rewrite half of this cuz it got deleted. Hope you enjoy nonetheless!

[sideaccount2025]

Why does pre shimmer season 1 Jinx look like fcking AUPowder😭 (Im about to go on a rant)

I got rid of Jinx's eyebags as best as my inexperienced ass could and tweaked her expression a bit, bro in a different lightening that is literally Powder, makes me realize why Ekko couldn't tell them apart initially😭 When he left she still looked like that to his memory(With the eyebags tho) and then he comes back and she looks like a train wreck with chopped hair, a missing finger, eyebags twice as bad, pale as a corpse and PINK eyes, bro what i would give to see the 60 minute cut is almost listed as a warcrime

But aside from that, is interesting (to me) how Jinx has a face model for when she acts like Powder where her expression becomes more innocent/harmless/childish like, meanwhile Powder always looks like Jinx, she only has one face model, perhaps because she is not fragmented by 'two identities' , doesn't have the Powder childhood trauma that would make her age regress unconsciously to such an extent that it would be shown even in her facial expressions and facial proportions. She isn't haunted by a much younger version of herself she's trying to hide and protect, because she actually lived her childhood and grew out of it, Jinx is sort of partially stuck in limbo there imo.

Idk bro is just interesting, i might be stupid for pointing this out when they are the same person, just ignore me if u think so pls.

Anyways, also, season 2 post Ekko boysaving- Jinx meeting AU!Powder would be wholesome asf imo?

Rant incoming

Maybe not season 1!Jinx or even post blowing up the council!Jinx but Jinx after rekindling with her one and only best friend and building shit together and painting on each other when she physically recoiled at touch before, i feel like with no Silco around to enable her and manipulate her, what happened with Isha plus Ekko who was once her only savior and friend seeking her out again at the edge of the abyss made a very important difference in her behavior and sanity, she's not as well adjusted as Powder is but she certainly isn't gonna like try to commit terrorism if she sees her.

I just feel like nobody can understand Jinx's struggle and mind like HERSELF, Powder has had the hallucinations too, she might still have them actually, she experienced grief to a degree aswell and over the same person too, because Jinx thought Vi was dead didn't she?. Not only that but Jinx's confidence and 'ideas that change the world' would be good for Powder who is holding herself back and staying on the sidelines even though she's smarter than anyone.

As Amanda said 'there is some Jinx in Powder and some Powder in Jinx' and in my opinion they both struggle with accepting the Powder/Jinx within them. Anyways imma stfu now, if anybody read this far is a miracle Xd

[shanastoryteller]

Happy Valentine’s Day grandma! There’re too many amazing options, so dealer’s choice?

Spock has an older brother.

He’s a teenager when Spock is born and by the time he’s taking his first cautious steps, he no longer lives at home. Sybok graduates the head of his class and flies through the Science Academy with similar ease and for almost as long as Spock has had memories, Sybok has been talking about his thesis.

It’s topic changes often enough that Spock’s stopped keeping track.

When he’s younger, it would be inaccurate to say that Sybok is around often, but he is around. His brother visits home to pilfer texts from the family library and to have short, tense conversations with their father but he will ask Spock about his studies and always inclines his head to Spock’s mother, something that many Vulcans will not do, so he thinks that means that Sybok loves them.

After he gets into a fight at school, Sybok doesn’t visit anymore.

Spock accepts it as something else that his emotional outburst has cost him and refuses to let the tears fall no matter the pressure building behind his eyes.

Books still disappear and reappear from the library, so he knows that Sybok is still coming over, it’s only when Spock isn’t home. Eventually he starts appearing again, and he still has those horrible tense conversations with their father and nods at his mother, but he no longer lingers to ask Spock about his studies.

The fact that it hurts so much is just a sign that he needs to focus on his control.

When Spock is fifteen, Sybok leaves Vulcan.

He tells himself he doesn’t see his brother often enough for it to matter. It s the truth and yet it feels like a lie.

Spock doesn’t mean to overhear a conversation that isn’t meant for him. But it his mother speaking, and Sybok, and he’s never observed them to exchange anything but greetings and farewells.

“-don’t have to do this. I know you want distance, but-”

“I’ve already tried the other side of the planet,” he says dryly, speaking with an oddly Terran cadence to his words. “The problem is he can still comm me and send his friends to look at me disapprovingly.”

“He’s concerned,” she says.

Sybok laughs. Spock startles, nearly giving himself away, but forces stillness and silence.

“I don’t want to overstep,” his mother says softly, “I know it’s not my place-”

“Amanda, please,” he scoffs. “This is your home, you’re my father’s wife, and you’re my brother’s mother. How can you overstep? You can’t speak freely anywhere else on this planet, of course you can speak freely with me.”

There’s a long silence. Spock wants so badly to peek around the corner, but if he does then they’ll know he’s there.

“He wants you to be happy,” his mother says. “I do too.”

Sybok sighs, but it sounds a lot nicer than his laugh had. “He wants me quiet. It’s bad enough that he’d decided I’m a bad influence on Spock, at this rate he’s doing to decided I’m a bad influence for all of Vulcan and kick me off the planet myself. I’m just speeding up the process.”

Father thinks that Sybok is a bad influence? Why would he –

“That incident was not your fault,” his mother says sharply.

Oh.

“Father was probably right, actually,” he admits. “If I’d been allowed to talk to Spock after, I would have told him it was a job well done. There’s fire in our blood, Amanda. Rage is the most Vulcan emotion there is.”

Spock blinks. That’s nothing he’s heard before.

“It’s things like this that make your father worried,” she sighs.

He laughs again, gentler this time. “It’s fine. I’m going to go to a nice remote planet with all my books and work on my thesis and this one is far enough that even Father won’t be able to bother me.”

“But Tarsus IV?” she asks. “It’s barely colonized, and it has terrible ion storms, and their agriculture is still developing! It’ll be difficult for you to keep to a Vulcan diet!”

There’s another silence, then Sybok says, “My mother never worried over me. She did not find it logical to waste the energy and mental capabilities on events she could not control.” Another pause. “It’s nice that you do, Amanda.”

“Oh, Sybok.” His mother sniffs. “You’re my husband’s son and my son’s brother. You’re my family too. Please be careful and let me know if you need anything at all. We’ll be waiting for you to come home.”

“I believe you will, at least,” he says, and then before his mother can respond, continues, “Live long and prosper, Amanda.”

She sighs again. “Live long and prosper, Sybok.”

Spock forces his racing heart calm. He hopes his brother returns home soon.

[mvmnbnv]

The way the people who've written reviews for Arcane s2 so far are praising Jinx's arc and are saying she's yet again the highlight of the show after seeing both Acts 1 and 2 says it all to me. "It's Vi's season", I'm doubting this more than ever. It's her season to be treated like crap even more, though, by the characters AND the writers, I'll give them that. I've been spoiled about Caitlyn turning cruel to Vi but it looked so much worse than I expected somehow?? And the people on the production side are the most proud of caitvi this season? Proud? Prouuud? PROUUUUUDDD???? What have they been smoking? This is so bad??

I'm honestly livid. Please Vi, RUN.

yeah the way its headed im upset tbh. like i myself love jinxs arc so far. shes evolving yet again, for a second time, and shes super fun to watch, while vi's arc is just surrounding a girl who when things go to shit starts treating her like trash because shes apparently "no different" or something...ill love vi even if the writers or the fandom dont though lol. but yeah i cant believe theyre proud of this...physical violence against your butch partner whoo-hoo! when butches are more likely to experience it irl! :D so praise worthy!! telling her shes no different than her sister who commited an act of terrorism and murdered people or the other people at the memorial all because she asked her not to kill a child. like...who thought it was good?? i remember amanda saying she wanted to write good sapphic rep and if she thinks this is it then ouch...im hurt as a lesbian. justice for my pretty butch bro...shes treated like trash in the show, has no mv or song to herself that we know of even tho its supposed to be her season, and her arc just seems like it has no care put into it and is centered around someone who is just awful to her rn it a borderline irredeemable way

[the1northlanderprincess]

Desperate Times, Desperate Measures

Whewww. Breathe, Amanda.

Ok, so, in a pre-show post, I talked about Gal's side of things in the relationship in this episode. Since several of you made posts explaining things after the fact better than I could, I'm going to discuss our favorite dark prince.

Yeah, so, our guy is in deep doo-doo. Now, I haven't watched the episode, but I gathered enough to get a sense of where this will take Haladriel for the remaining episodes.

What I really want to focus on is his mental and emotional state. So, Sauron creates an illusion to manipulate Celebrimbor into thinking that everything is hunky-dory in Eregion, and maybe to get him to relax a little. Everyone around him is affected by the darn thing. That includes Mirdania. In Sauron's concoction, she's wearing the same shade of green and hairstyle that Galadriel wore in 1x08. It gets even weirder: he is all soft and touchy-feely with her. The physical appearance, in my eyes, is very significant. It's the last time that Sauron had seen Gal in person, and had a positive interaction with her, before it all went to crap. I believe he captured that memory of her image to savor it. It was undoubtedly the last authentic happiness he ever felt.

After he is left to his own devices, Sauron hears a random elf tell his blonde girlfriend that her beauty is too indescribable for poetry. He seems to stop and dwell on this moment. This is important, too, because it is understood that Sauron is still in his own headspace. Why would he come up with something like that if he wasn't thinking of the beautiful blonde elf he himself knows? Now, we know that Sauron is enthralled with Galadriel's hair. However, this dialogue suggests to me that he finds all of her attractive. I think that should be a plus in the Haladriel Column of Pros and Cons.

Where does this lead? Well, it's more notable than ever that he is spiraling without Galadriel. His expression while listening to that couple is kind of depressed. I think he wants something like that SO BAD with her, but you know a little voice is telling him he can't. It's not possible for a being like him to have a cutesy moment like that with the she-elf he loves, and he knows it. I honestly feel sorry for him. Anyway, this all spells Bad News Bears for Mirdania. She sees all of this attention she's getting from him, and doesn't realize it's in place of the one he can't have. She'll try something, maybe kissing him (GAG), but he'll rebuff her in the worst way imaginable.

When Sauron and Gal do meet on that hill, I am almost willing to bet that he's so out of it, he will make an impassioned, broken plea for her to reconsider his offer. The Halbrand theme, which has a certain rush-against-time-to-get-to-the-one-you-love sound to it, will be heard during this moment. And we'll all drop from mega feels.

Overall, I think we can all agree that Sauron is out of his mind with desire for Galadriel, and I believe we will get immensely rewarded in the finale (or we better!)

[sadceline]

THE ENHYPEN HOST || 10

|| Reverse harem || ft. TXT, Mingyu (Seventeen) & BTS

WARNINGS: foul language, explicit content, group sex, humiliation, sex in public, threesome, foursoome, rough sex, red flags, immoral acts, unprotected sex, morbid jealousy, comedy, parody, possessiveness, violent quarrels, arguments, betrayals, lies, femdom sometimes. GENRE: +18, reverse harem, comedy, enemy to lovers, friends to lovers SUMMARY: You moved to Seoul to start over after a bad experience, and everything seems to be going well, you even manage to work for HYBE. You discover, however, that you owe them almost a billion won, money you don't have and don't know how to recover: but don't worry because Hybe itself offers you a solution. Your body in exchange for paying off your debt. Do you accept?

TRAILER:

PREVIOUS CHAPTER:

FIRST CHAPTER:

ATTENTION: this chapter will be pov heeseung, so from his first-person point of view, I hope not to cause confusion ~~

I glare at him, he really betrayed himself. And quickly, too. Not that he was so good at hiding it so far.

I see him roll his eyes. "What do you want from me?"

"Dumb, you're hurt her?" I repeat his words, incredulous.

He twists his lips annoyed and looks away. "You pushed her."

"Stop it Sunghoon…." I advise him, looking tired.

"What?"

"Really?"

"Haven't you ever gotten tired?" He has the courage to answer.

"Everyone has figured it out that you're interested."

"The point is that I'm not really, I'm just having fun, but you guys take this so seriously, and it's pathetic." He laughs, trying to ridicule my position.

In fact, I'm uncomfortable. "You don't understand."

"You've been with her half a day and now you're crazy about her? What, you fuck her too? You say she's that good?"

"I just want you not to torment her, I need her sane to fuck her."

Yet Sunghoon smiles anyway. "Jay has already forgotten her, why don't you do the same? - He asks me, lifting his wrist with the watch and showing it. - It's not long before the shift ends."

"You take it for granted that I like her, why do you find it impossible for me not to like her, since you like her?"

The question comes out as a kind of riddle, I see Sunghoon holding back a laugh. He doesn't want to laugh because I struck him in honor, but at the same time, my tone and the sound of the words came out a little too funny.

"But you disparage her, you scorched earth her. You blame her because you hate the fact that she will give herself not only to you but to everyone who will allow her to survive."

"Survive? Is that a feminist slogan? You're a feminist now?" He attempts to change the subject, believing he's insulting me, perhaps, in a totally clumsy way.

"Only now?"

"I am not interested, I simply enjoy annoying her."

"You are literally an elementary school child!" I accuse him, aloud.

"She amuses me - he admits, chuckling as his gaze is perhaps lost in some specific memory. - It amuses me when she's angry."

"What if Wonyoung found out? That you amuse yourself like this."

"If you tell her, the host thing will come up…. - he tells me, with a grin, feels advantaged. - Wait, now that I think about it…don't the girls also have hosts?"

I ponder this too, but it seems unlikely, since I've often been in girls' band dorms. "I don't… know?"

"No, this is a male thing. - He concludes the question, relieved, the monkey. - Besides, Wonyoung would tell me right away."

"Like you told her about Amanda?" I imply doubt.

If he goes back to focusing on his beautiful girlfriend, maybe he will get tired of playing with Amanda. 

Stop asking me: the reason is obvious, if he keeps harassing her she will leave on her own, since I want to have fun, it's not good for me.

Come to think of it though, if she stopped being a host, she would just be a beautiful girl, wouldn't she? Would she go back to being a fan of mine? Just mine? No, she wasn't mine from the beginning.

"Heeseung, you can have better than her." He changes the subject, after several seconds.

I smile nervously. "What?"

"Why do you worry so much? I thought at least you didn't bust."

"She's pretty, isn't she? - I ask, knowing he wouldn't answer, so I smile. - It's just about that, let me enjoy in peace. You don't have to torment her just because you can't…."

"Even so, shouldn't you let her go?" He dares to ask.

How can he say such things while denying that he is interested in her? He accused me of taking little time, me wanting to just and exclusively her, while he seems so obsessed with her since we got back. Even his being so interested in the fact that I had been in her hous,, why was that so upsetting to him? I could fuck her at home, too.

"Why? I don't even have to commit myself. - I explain to him, confidently. - Besides, even you must have seen some fans who wanted to fuck you, maybe even been there. But it's always a mess and they become obsessed, she's not only pretty, she was sent directly from the agency so I don't have to worry."

Sunghoon smiles but actually looks rather annoyed. "Should I do that too?"

"Risk losing Wonyoung?"

Although I have reasons to believe that he won't give in to temptation anyway, I can't be so sure. Honestly, I can beat everyone else, but Sunghoon is a little too ethereal. She, who has always preferred me, as she indirectly admitted, was completely thunderstruck by Sunghoon, it is obvious.

Of Jay she will soon forget, I am sure, but of Sunghoon? By continuing to be on her like this they will end up becoming friends, even close.

"You worry a lot about my relationship." He says, getting serious.

I smile automatically, there goes the real Sunghoon again. "When you're alone you have a lot of time and observe a lot of things."

"Oh yeah, and what have you noticed?"

"That you are really lucky. I can have better, but you really have it. What are you still doing here, with me?"

"I was waiting for the moment when you told me not to go near Amanda again, in a threatening way. Did I say right? Is that going to happen? Maybeo that comes in the next chapters."

I have to laugh, I admit. "We are not good for this situation."

He sneers. "I noticed."

Eventually the discussion dies there and we return to the living room, where Amanda sits next to Ester but also Yeonjun, who is showing the girls some photos taken on a trip. Jay keeps an eye on them but stays in his seat while Niki and Beomgyu, who are exchanging strange looks, order food.

Soobin got the good booze and talks to Taehyun about it, not sure how he knew where were, meanwhile they rang. Why doesn't anyone carry their keys in this house?

I go to open it, it's Sunoo.

Instinctively I change direction, letting him in. He smiles, as always.

He makes me think of strange periods in my growing up, so sometimes, spontaneously, I avoid him.

"Omo, you are all here but.. Kai sumbae is not here?"

"He was busy." Taehyun says, laughing.

"He has the private personal trainer." He clarifies doubts Jungwon, who knows him well, after entering and taking off his shoes.

"Omo…but you are beautiful! - Says Sunoo, pointing at Amanda. - And so are you! But who are you?" He asks Ester.

Jungwon is also quite confused by the vision, still staring at Amanda as if he cannot believe she was hiding all that under the sloppy clothes she always wears.

"Didn't you read on group? - Jungwon asks, approaching the two girls. - Nice to meet you all!" - He laughs, with his sly grin.

Amanda smiles, I guess she finds him adorable, not knowing him. "This is Ester, my best friend."

"You have such a young friend?"

"Actually I'm older than her." She admits, incredulous in front of the other two band members. That must be really nice for a fan.

"What?" - Jungwon replies, turning toward our personal host, then squaring her not-so-subtly: breasts, hips, skirt cleavage. Trivial. - And you are?" He asks, lifting his gaze.

"You're a rascal, huh? You always gave me that idea." Ester comments, suddenly much less shy.

Sunoo waves to her, and is probably the person who best fits the standards of a partner for korean male genre, in this room. Yes, I'm mean, but I have my reasons.

"Beautiful people always go in pairs, huh?" Sunoo asks.

Amanda smiles at him naturally, you can tell, she is not flustered like with me. With me she feels uncomfortable, but how the fuck is that possible? I'm pure easy-going. I'm a good guy, I don't understand.

"How did you two meet?" Yeonjun asks, after a while, as everyone takes a seat and orders in turn.

"We faced the same high school, then we drifted apart…." Begins the story Ester, who might have preferred to omit this part.

"Then my boyfriend fuck his cousin and I had no one - Amanda smiles, in the tomb-like silence that has fallen. - She snatched me up like a stray dog and I'm really grateful."

Ester is struck by her words, to the point that her eyes glaze over. "Are you dumb? What are you saying?" She seems to ask, but I don't understand why they are speaking in italian, I guess…. or was it spanish?

"Omo, how cute - Yeonjun says, amidst the primitive howls of the boys excited by seeing them so vulnerable, helpless, cute. Meanwhile, however, he pushes himself on Amanda, in that sort of pink micro tank top he's wearing. - But what do you mean he cheated on you with his cousin?"

Amanda, surprised by the contact, immediately looks toward Ester, then laughs nervously. "I was beginning to wonder when you were going to ask, I was getting worried." She admits.

Wait, right, her cousin!

No, it's even more serious that she was betrayed.

No, that she had no one.

Why didn't she have anyone?

"They had been dating for years. I was so confused that I didn't understand it at that time."

"You have a radar for assholes." Ester smiles wryly.

"We moved to the beach area, though, so I recovered quickly." Amanda jokes, downplaying the situation shyly.

"Oh, that's too bad." Says Soobin, more interested.

"Our sea is the best." She brags, the redhead.

"We have the sea too, but I don't know if it's better." Says Yeonjun, leaning on Amanda's shoulder but looking at Ester.

"Are you asking me to go there together?" The friend asks.

"Would you say yes?"

"Ew, hyung." Beomgyu whines.

"Disgusting." Soobin nods.

"Too close." Reminds Jay instead, who is focused as usual: good job!

Yeonjun shrugs off laughing. "You should ask her if it's okay before scolding me."

"I've already decided it's not okay."

"In fact, detach yourself." She supports the argument of her great love, Ester, hugging our host and holding in her thin arms.

"How can you talk to me like that?" He pretends to be offended, my former friend, one of many.

I sigh, drawing attention. "Jungwon, do you take karaoke?"

"Oh, it's like high school." Responds the leader laughing and starting for his room.

While the food is being ordered and Taehyun is busy distributing the glasses, three or four different speeches have already started. The odd ones, to tell the truth, are Sunghoon and me.

Even Jay has engaged in a heated discussion with Taehyun, and I'm not surprised, being the only intelligent one among them idiots. Occasionally Sunghoon and I look at each other, but then we quickly look away.

When Jungwon comes back, with the karaoke machine, they all really cheer like kids, looking like they're really having fun.

As Sunghoon helps him mount it in the flat TV, I start to feel the alcohol fumes cloud me. Always too busy with work, I can hardly even engage in this kind of leisure, plus alcohol has too many calories…. if I have to choose it will be ramen.

"Who's first?"

"Me - Jay offers, getting up. - I'll go."

"Omo! Are you really going to sing?" Ester asks, while Amanda also looks at the same boy.

"What do you want me to sing?"

The friend turns to our host, noticing her absorbed gaze on Jay, I can see her smiling in confusion and embarrassment. "What do you recommend?"

Amanda returns the nervous smile. "Brought the heat back?"

"Wait, do we sing our own songs?" Sunoo asks.

"Since them are here, we could show them a good time." Says Soobin, though his tone sounds rather malicious.

"Why this one?" Jay asks.

"Your voice is very beautiful, it's perfect for the song. You make incredible notes and you sing more." She replies, like any fan, but she's actually right.

Jay is crazy in that song, he has more space, it is really remarkable how he can use his voice, although he does not profess to be a singing talent, too modest as always.

She was able to surprise him, perhaps excite him, this little b… ok, stop it. Jay feels the same way, which is why he looks at her in confusion, looking away shortly after, annoyed but, knowing him, also embarrassed.

I guess if she said something like that to me I'd have a heartbeat, like today in her apartment…. And not only that.

Why am I always horny?

"Okay, and that's fine."

"Woo! - Shouts Beomgyu, raising his fist in cheers. - Go Jay oppa!"

Yeonjun mumbles, looking exhausted. "And what am I supposed to sing?"

"Good boy gone bad!" Ester immediately responds.

Amanda nods. "Yes, please! The rap part!"

The two start squawking, eventually annoying everyone except Yeonjun, clearly.

"In live he doesn't sing it well." Beomgyu teases him.

"You just sound envious to me!" Ester replies, confidentially.

He offended looks at her. "How?"

But isn't he the one who was interested in her, with that petite, slender, pale pink body of hers, in that little black micro dress that highlights her prosperous breasts?

I like Ester, honestly I would like to fuck her, however, I still prefer Amanda's smaller breasts, her harmonious proportions, her more shapely and trained body, squeezed into that other micro dress of an innocent lilac, but only that of innocent. It sticks to her, and no need to imagine what she's hiding, it tickles my taste buds to the point of watering every time I look at her.

Anything from the way she looks to the way she moves her lips to speak is erotic. Perhaps what makes it erotic is her inferior position, come to think of it, because it makes me want to possess her, in every way.

"You steal my thunder, hyung." Jay says theatrically, putting on a big voice.

Taehyun bursts out laughing. "He's right, you're always so intrusive."

"I was just inquiring." Yeonjun justifies himself.

First Jongseong sings, the girls sing in chorus with him while we in the band just mime, involved. When Yeonjun performs his number, like a trained animal, during the part of his rap the two start screaming like rabid fans, holding hands.

After him sings Taehyun, one of their best songs, We lost the summer, this makes them dream, it is obvious. They are attending their own private concert.

In fact, although not exploited properly, Yeonjun has the talent to be a very good rapper, and it's obvious that it bothers me, because among the five thousand things I can do perfectly, this doesn't fit in.

I tried very little, I didn't experiment enough, maybe precisely because I thought I might fail. I've been told I'm good, but I don't really believe it.

"Omo. You are really outstanding in live."

"There are fans who shell out millions of won to see us in concert, but you have never been there?" Soobin asks curiously.

Ester glares at him. "I've been to all of you concerts since I moved here."

"How about you?" He turns to Amanda.

"I really…. - starts to say, shyly-I've only been to see Enhypen. Once."

I hold back an expression of sheer enjoyment but still look at Yeonjun, wanting to enjoy the reaction of his wounded pride, he doesn't seem too surprised though, instead tapering his gaze focused on her, did he intend it as a challenge? I certainly hope not.

"At what stage?" Jungwon asks.

"The one in Seoul, the last one."

"Were you already working for Hybe? You could have asked them. Staff tickets are discounted." Sunoo explains.

"It means we will have to invite you two to our next tour. You might even leave with us." Yeonjun replies.

But what does he say?

Amanda looks at him surprised, not knowing what to say.

"Excuseme, what?" Sunghoon asks.

"We could ask for new hosts, maybe to accompany us during the concerts. In fact, they are very stressful."

Amanda is embarrassed, I can see it, my heart clenching to see her so distressed. She certainly didn't want the matter to come out again, this time in front of Sunoo and Jungwon.

"Too bad Amanda is already our host." Jungwon replies, with the confidence of a leader. Even if he uses his power little.

Yeonjun puts his arm on Amanda's shoulder, drawing her closer. "Contracts expire. When does yours?"

"There is no date." She answers, surprising us.

We stay staring at her pretty much all of us, even her friend, who strangely did not ask her such an obvious question. Neither did any of us, it seems.

"What?" I ask, surprised.

"They said they would let me know."

"You signed without knowing when you would be finished?" Yeonjun also asks, confused but also annoyed.

"What was your host doing earlier?" Amanda asks, bluntly, without turning around.

"She was a model, and she got into a scandal right away, and they cancelled her."

"Did she owe money to Hybe?"

"What?- Answers Soobin, surprised. - No, no."

"You owed money to Hybe?" Repeats Yeonjun, equally bewildered.

"Whose turn is it now to sing?" He diverts Jay's attention.

"Sunoo, you go." Says Jungwon, understanding Jay's strategy.

The boy who was quietly drinking his cocktail is practically forced to get up. "Yah! Are you animals?"

"Just sing, hyung." Snorts Niki.

Clearly, dirty laundry need to be washed at home, and we still have much to discuss. They are certainly not the ones who need to know these things; it is not with them that she should open up. She seems to understand this and lowers her face like a scolded little girl. How cute?

Sunoo starts singing, they listen to him dreamily, and I have to admit that his timbre, his voice, his skills, are outstanding overall. He gives 100 percent at karaoke as much as at a concert, and this, undoubtedly, makes him a great performer.

The evening, from this moment on, goes on more and more cheerfully. We are increasingly full of alcohol, we smoke, eventually even Sunghoon relaxes slightly, although he always keeps his distance from TXT.

We dine with korean meals, Taehyun takes the opportunity to explain some of our culture at the table, and they seem really interested. In fact, it might be helpful if they want to marry a korean.

I'm not sure what their culture is in this regard, but korean men often demand that the woman take care of and cook for her husband, especially if he is the only one working - at least that's what they taught me - although, judging from Amanda's resume, not many korean will want to marry her.

Intuiting Ester's personality as well, I could say the same about her.

In any case, Amanda has said she will leave Korea. In another place, she could continue to live normally, but at this point even if the seven of us kept our mouths shut, some of them others will tell around. I wouldn't be surprised if it's Yeonjun.

It's not that I'm sad about it, that's clear, but it would have been fun to see her out, if only as a pastime. Maybe friends with benefits. Honestly even to be kind, we live too different lives, we belong to different worlds, too different.

I do feel a little sorry for her, though. If Hybe really set her up, she will no longer have the choice of her life, to stay in Korea, should she so desire. And if marrying a korean man was her dream, as I imagine it is for many foreign young silly girls, because after all, a bit silly girl she is, shouldn't she be able to decide for herself?

As I walk out of the bathroom, passing through the kitchen where Beomgyu, Niki, Yeonjun and Sunghoon are, I notice that in the balcony, Jay and Jungwon stand secluded whispering. It seems to be an intimate conversation and I usually let it go, but right now I'm really curious about what they are saying to each other.

I get a drink, the balcony door is very close to the refrigerator but I still can't tell, plus I don't want to stare at them too directly.

I approach sipping my cocktail I see Jay holding the e-cig in his hands. Lately he had stopped using it, who knows why to pick it up just today.

"We can continue to play it cool." Jungwon says, under his breath.

Jay sighs in frustration. "We need to find out more about their host."

"I don't think they'll give us any trouble that way - the leader replies seriously, looking at his friend - being in the same situation, it wouldn't make sense to expose something like that to the media."

"I don't think they're going to sabotage us with the press - Jay explains, and I approach with confidence, because I know I can participate in this conversation. - Our host is really pretty, isn't she? You saw her tonight Amanda."

"I'm still shaken." Jungwon adds, amused, alluding.

I twist my lips, annoyed that the discussion has come to this point. "And what do you think they might do?"

"Our contract has just started, they might override us. Even if it was just to annoy Heeseung, Yeonjun would be able to take it." Jay makes sure he is not being watched by him as he whispers.

"He doesn't have that much power." I respond in a rush, a little too much, I guess.

Jungwon smiles, I find it rather creepy. "We can't know."

"Would she go so far as to disturb Hybe just to annoy me?"

"Amanda is fresher than their host, I gather." Says Jay, lucid as usual.

"Haven't you dirtied her enough already?" Jungwon asks, laughing, as the oldest among them stiffens a bit, perhaps uncomfortable with the question.

"It's not funny." He replies. Yeah, I think so, too.

"You need to tell me more about what you did - Jungwon sighs, leaning against the railing - but regardless, it will be enough if they never meet again, right?"

"You are the one who is a great friend of theirs. You should know them, what are they going to do?" I ask annoyed.

"Weren't you friends with Yeonjun? - He reminds me of the leader, annoyed by my tone despite being three years younger than me. - And they won't do anything in my opinion anyway. The situation with Amanda, it won't last."

At least ten seconds of silence after his words. We are the ones left without, looking at him.

"Why are you staring at me? Isn't it obvious?"

Jay tightens his lips, looking away; I am quite confused. Based on what does he say this? I don't want to sound naive, so I say nothing.

"It's funny, I admit - Jungwon chuckles - considering who he hangs out with, but you see it too, don't you? Sunghoon is crazy about her, and he's in denial right now, so let alone what he'll do when he accepts it. That is, if he accepts it."

Jongseong crosses his arms over his chest, then snorts. "Are you sure that's what it is?"

"That's what I think, yes."

Why is the one who is speechless now only me?

Perhaps because as long as this was just my consideration, my thought, it appeared simply remediable.

Amanda is beautiful, really beautiful, but beautiful enough to drive Park Sunghoon crazy? She who was just an ordinary girl until yesterday, what is so special about her that makes him crazy?

And why did this affect me so much that it took my words away.

"There is also the matter of her friend." Jay recalls.

"Why? She is not a host."

"It's possible they might want to fuck her in the future. - He asks, and seems genuinely concerned. - They shouldn't."

"She is a normal girl, even though it may annoy you, she has every right to hang out with them if she feels like it."

"She hasn't been soiled, has she?" I ask, after I don't know how long.

Is that really the first thing I can think of to say in such a situation? They look at me in a mixture of puzzlement and amazement.

"Look at this guy." Jungwon comments, looking at me.

Jay sighs. "I won't say anything."

"Why?" He asks him.

"Because it's not entirely inexplicable."

The leader seems to understand the message between the lines and clicks his tongue in amusement. "Really? Is that what happens to you after you fuck her? It's starting to scare me."

Me sleeping with her… yes, of course I have - I would say, if asked. But why would I lie?

I just didn't like that tasteless exit. It's okay if I do these things, just me. Not Jungwon, not Jay, much less Sunghoon.

"Let's change the subject. - Sentences Jay, seriously. - Heeseung, you are better than Sunghoon." He reminds me, I know better.

"You are misunderstanding." I say stiffly.

"Anyway, maybe if you keep her quiet, Ester, she won't be seen with them." Says the leader.

Jay looks at him. "That's all we need and they send me in forever hiatus."

Jungwon bursts out laughing, holding his stomach. "You're right."

On second thought, wouldn't that be better? Yes, I'm not completely listening to the discussion, but wouldn't it be better if Amanda stopped being a host? That way, maybe her reputation is still savable? Honestly, Jongseong and Jaeyun are not the types to go around flaunting it, partly because it would be to their detriment.

When Sunghoon's shift comes, however, things may change. Not to mention that Niki will also have his shift. If she really were to sleep with everyone, there would really be no redemption.

"What are you thinking?" Jungwon asks me, curious, noticing my silence.

"Nothing, why?"

"Don't lie." Jay continues.

"Do you guys want this situation to last? - The leader asks again. - We may have another host if her inevitably leads to problems."

"Amanda will continue to be our host - Jay replies seriously. - That's not going to change."

"You can date her if she wasn't a host, right?" His friend reminds him.

I stiffen, again, he's not even wrong. "But no, she likes everyone. I'm not interested in a non-exclusive relationship."

Perhaps that is the one fundamental truth - beyond the fact that she have to do it for work, she likes them all. I'm not even in a position to judge her, after all, that's natural. However, this means that Amanda can only and only be a host.

Maybe all this time I just kept acting, thinking, like a kid.

"Let's play truth or dare." Proposes Sunoo, back with the girls and Taehyun in the kitchen, lifting a bottle of tequila.

"Alcoholic version?" Niki mumbles drunkenly, sitting partly on the floor, partly on the sofa.

"Are we on a high school night theme?" Comments Sunghoon, who strangely looks at me but then looks away.

What does he have in mind?

"Let's do it." Amanda staggers, throwing herself onto the couch as her bare legs are inches from Riki's face.

"You should go to sleep, you're lost." Jongseong tells her, twisting his lips.

"No! Let's play." She smiles, satisfied as a child.

I clear my throat, against it. "Yes, maybe we should call it a night."

"No, come on, now that was getting interesting!" Beomgyu complains, whining like a wayward child.

It's now 2 am, we have commitments tomorrow anyway, they certainly do too, to continue this evening would be pointless and tiring. Besides, tonight, it's my turn but she if she's in this condition…I just can't.

Ester hugs her friend. "Now I'm going home."

"How are you coming? - Amanda asks her, surprisingly lucid for having her eyes practically closed due to alcohol. - I'll drive for you!"

"But you don't even drive, dumb!"

"I… I can drive! - She says, with conviction but slurping. - I don't have a car but I can drive." He continues in italian, I guess, and I don't understand.

To look at them, these two are cute. As they tease and joke, as they worry about each other, it's a relationship I haven't had with anyone in a while, I guess I miss it.

"I'll take you back." Jay offers, I guess either to let her end the evening on a high note, or to fuck her (much more likely).

"I have the car, too!" Beomgyu says.

"Yes, but you're with mine now." Yeonjun reminds him.

"Can I borrow it?"

"I'll take her back, I said." Jongseong then asserts himself.

"But…I have my own." Ester replies, genuinely surprised.

"All the more reason, you can't drive."

"And how do you get back?"

"I'll call a driver." He sighs.

Ester is easily persuaded, who greets her friend by kissing and squeezing her, I imagine she is very grateful for the opportunity she is having, thanks to her. She then greets everyone rather meekly to quickly follow Jay who leads the way.

It is time to accompany the sumbae as well, finally. Yeonjun is rather reluctant but does not object probably because he knows he is busy, however, he does not miss the opportunity to greet Amanda by giving her a sensual kiss on the cheek, she remains completely petrified.

"Yah! - She turns informally, Sunghoon, glaring at him as he simply laughs it off. - Why don't you leave?"

"See you sumbae." I extend my hands toward the door gently pointing him to the exit and he, goes outside.

We say goodbye to them all and then everyone heads off to their room, guess who excepted.

Sunghoon is still looking at me, but what does he want? I don't have time.

"Go to your room, I'll come and give you something in a little while." I tell her.

She lifts my thumb, she is very cute while doing so, but I keep feeling conflicting impulses. I'm contrite, I have to keep my composure, but she doesn't make it easy: with her red cheeks, her moist, glossy full lips, her breasts so obvious no bra.

Sunghoon seems to read my mind since when I look at him, he allows himself a restrained, ironic laugh.

Amanda doesn't realize it, she simply walks off to my room, I like this feeling. But Sunghoon is still watching me, what is it, he wants to comment on the matter? Make me change my mind? I'll wait for her to recover, but I'm not giving up.

"Are you happy?" He asks, I knew it.

I smile nonchalantly. "Average, more than the fact that they're gone."

"A relief indeed - he confers, tame - anyway you say you don't care, right?"

"But who? The host?" I ask incredulously and nervously.

"That's right." He clicks his tongue, as if I got the reaction he waited.

What does he want?

"It seems the other way around, doesn't it? We could prove to each other that we are in good faith, and fuck her together."

I honestly stand stunned at such a proposal.

No, he can't be serious, he can't have thrown off the mask already.

"Didn't you say you would never sleep with her?" I ask, suddenly nervous.

"She won't know." He answers, quietly.

"What?" I am incredulous.

"We close her eyes, honestly, even if she gets it I don't care. The important thing is that she doesn't see it."

I just laugh. Me, I have nothing to prove. I won't let him get his hands on her before me.

It's just a matter of pride.

"No." I answer.

"Why?"

"Do it on your turn."

"But she would know it's me."

Why does he answer so quickly? He doesn't give me time to think, to understand.

"No."

He looks at me surprised. "Why?" He asks again.

"Why don't you ask Niki?"

"He doesn't like me."

And I do? In theory, before today, I would have said so, but why Park Sunghoon do you make it so to love you? You are a manipulator, an asshole.

"I don't care about anything - he puts his hands out, with a disinterested expression - let me be clear. But I'm showing you. I wouldn't feel like doing it with others anyway."

"With me it's not strange?"

"No, because I think you're someone who just thinks about getting laid."

He's praising me. I know he is, but why does he have this effect on me? I look away, honestly embarrassed.

"I know it's the first of your shifts, however, I didn't think you cared about these things…"

And now he belittles me, but elegantly.

I know he is trying to manipulate me.

"How do you want to stop her from seeing?"

"Is that a yes?"

"Don't run." I admonish him.

But why don't I deny it?

Honestly, I shouldn't care what he thinks of me, I should just give a damn and let him think I'm crazy in love with Amanda, or not?

Equally and perhaps stronger is the desire not to appear weak. Everything I've imagined so far is nothing but pure, very silly fantasies.

Hanging out with her? How could I.

"I have a night mask." H explains.

I sigh. "No, it's weird. Besides, you saw her, nothing's going to happen tonight."

"She'll be fine." He tells me confidently.

His eyes burn with desire at this moment and I feel great annoyance, but also great fear. He cannot, must not think that I care about Amanda, because that would make me weak, ridiculous.

"There's no point in you wanting to do that, she would know right away that it's you."

"The important thing is that she doesn't see me." He repeats, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

It is obvious, he wants to continue playing with her, and he wants to do it more seriously. If I allow him to do so, I'll go along with his game clearly, but if I don't -- I'll be weak.

"Of course, if you say no, though, I will let it go. Maybe I was wrong about you." He sighs falsely sorry.

I twist my lips, annoyed. "I don't like the idea of you being there."

"You said you wouldn't do anything, given her condition."

"Even if we did, it would be strange. No?"

He smirks. "No problem, hyung. It's fine with me."

Yes, I get it, it's just not so fine with me. It's our first night together, after all, I already had my own idea of what was going to happen, I don't know if I want to give it up.

"What about Wonyoung?" I ask then.

Sunghoon tightens his lips. "It's not going to come out, right?"

"What if hypothetically Amanda could get to her?"

"She couldn't say she's seen me anyway. She's a fan… And then realistically.. how could she get to her?"

I am stunned. No, it can't go his way but I'm not doing anything concrete to prevent it. He is younger than I am but I fear his contempt so much? What is happening to me?

"Hyung, it's a game. You know too that she… is only for this…"

"Don't say that." I look at him badly, really badly.

Sunghoon smiles. "Don't get me wrong, it's just that… if she's here, why don't we just have fun? Leave the matters of the heart to Jongseong and Jaeyun. We… are different, aren't we?"

NEXT CHAPTER:

[rattycattyfanfic]

haircut

for @mirroredmemoriez 's prompt!

7.) Lynn helping Amanda cut her hair. Be it a wholesome or angst thing up to you. As they say, hair holds memories.

743 words, mentions of mandy mental illness??? and suggestion of sh. if anyone would like to submit short simple prompts that i can deal with in less than 800 words, my inbox is open!!

It’s a bad day for her today, and it looks like blunt kitchen scissors and dull hair at the bottom of the sink. She’s been thinking about it for a while, tugging at limp hair whenever she glances too long in the mirror and glorifying the freedom of those first few weeks of her shitty DIY haircut that she’d done after her first test. She’s been thinking about it for a while, and it is so like her to run towards a sharp object at the first sign of trauma flooding back. 

Amanda stares deep into the mirror, stares at the gaunt shadows beneath her eyes and the odd chop of her hair, and then her stomach twists unpleasantly and she attacks another long strand of hair. Her mind is full of faces recently, John’s and Adam’s and even Lynn’s, sweaty and nervous in her shotgun collar. She can’t stand to look at her own face. The scissors cut dully through another chunk of lank hair and she imagines she is shedding not just her hair but her own skin, her own self.

“Mandy?”

Lynn’s voice through the bathroom door, muffled and concerned, but never distrustful, never scared. It makes her feel worse, somehow. She’s just cutting her hair, and yet she feels like she’s been caught red-handed, bloody-handed, caught in old habits. It’s just a haircut, and she feels like a guilty dog. “What,” she calls out, the scissors shaking in her hand.

A pause, a thoughtful silence, and then a blunt, “You’ve been in there a while. Everything ok?” Lynn is like that, now. Thoughtful, yet clinical in a way. Mandy likes it, likes it straightforward. Lynn doesn’t mince words, doesn’t talk through stupid metaphors or half-truths that she has to work to understand. She likes that about her. She’s not stupid, but she likes that about her.

“Fine,” she grunts, and it sounds too loud to her. She chops another section of hair, and then chops at the same chunk again, unsatisfied, unsettled, and again, and again. She throws the scissors down into the sink with a frustrated clink of metal against porcelain. 

“I’m coming in, ok?” Lynn says through wood after another long pause. She’s coming in. Amanda could stop her, has the strength to hold the door shut, has the slight physical edge, even knows Lynn would listen if she contested. She stands still and stares into the mirror instead. 

The door squeaks open, and Lynn furrows her brow, probably. Takes in her shitty haircut, probably, and immediately recognises it for the sign of turmoil that it is. “Oh,” Lynn murmurs, and stays there for a second with one hand on the door knob and the other worrying the edge of her camisole. And then she’s moving, and Amanda doesn’t even feel the need to flee. She stays very still and quiet until Lynn is at her shoulder, brushing a few stray cut hairs away from her cheek. “Short hair suits you,” is all she says, low and soft, and meets Amanda’s eyes in the mirror. 

Amanda trembles, and then scoffs. “It looks shit.”

“It’s a bit rough, sure,” Lynn murmurs, and fingers a chunk of hair sticking out sideways ever so tenderly. “I like it,” she says, and her thumb trails slowly down the newly exposed curve of her jaw, back up to the round of her cheek. “Can I help?” Her other hand edges slowly towards the sink, palm up, offering, tentative. 

Wordless, Amanda nods jerkily, and scrambles for the scissors abandoned in the hairy sink. She deposits them in Lynn’s open palm and it feels heavy, meaningful. “Sure. Thanks.”

Lynn nods, and offers a small quirk of her mouth in the mirror, and Amanda watches as she gently goes about neatening up what she’d already cut short. She takes her time, stops, pauses to look and think and then trims some more, careful and slow. Amanda tries to stay very still even though her knees feel like jelly, and after a quiet eternity, Lynn sets the scissors down on the edge of the sink. She runs her finger tips through the short spiky hairs at the nape of Amanda’s neck, scratches gently. “Looks good,” she whispers. “Do you feel better?”

Amanda shivers. She nods. She stares into the mirror and the hair does look better, and Lynn is at her back pressing a gentle kiss against the shell of her ear. “Yeah. Yeah, I do.”

[smoshsfavoritepizzaplace]

omg i’d love to read your whole reaction it’d be so nice <3 as i’ve mentioned before, i unfortunately got to know 4 months late

Ok great! I haven’t written it yet, but since I plan on writing EVERYTHING down, it will probably be long, so strap in. Ps. This probably won’t be very interesting, it’s not that crazy of a story but it’s one of the only things I can remember in its entirety since like I always say, I have a horrible memory for the most part so I’m proud I haven’t forgotten yet. Anyway, here’s the story…

So I have a bad sleep schedule and I wake up at 2pm every day. (I dont think it’s THAT bad but it could be better. I just don’t really do anything for me to have to wake up early.) Anyway, I wake up, make my bed, and head to the bathroom as one does. I start brushing my teeth with my phone next to the sink to count the two minutes for my brushing, so as I’m doing that, I’m scrolling through my notifications to see if there was anything I missed. When I tell you I had SO MANY notifications from this app, i was scrolling through so much. Now remember, I’m just scrolling my notification wall so I can’t see the whole posts, just a little bit of what was written. But one notification in particular caught my eye, a blog answered an ask that said “I KNEW IT! FINALLY.” And I was like, they knew what? What in the world happened? So I head over to Instagram and this was I think the first thing I see:

Now as you can tell, this photo is a bit dark and I always have my darkness turned down, so I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me. I then turned my brightness all the way up and my jaw dropped. Good thing I was home alone bc I remember yelling at the top of my lungs “THEY GOT MARRIED!” I was so ecstatic, I immediately stopped brushing my teeth and ran to my couch. I finally went to see all the tumblr posts I missed and it was so bizarre seeing everyone and myself included freak out over this. (Just to add, they posted this around 12-1pm my time so it wasnt too far after.) After some time, I finally got the courage to go to the actual insta post they made since I was just seeing reposts of it. I think I spent multiple minutes looking at each and every photo in that slide individually and I was physically shaking, not an exaggeration. And I was like omg I can’t believe this is happening. I then head over Twitter after some time and they straight up nuked my entire home feed. That’s when I started seeing people say the possibility of it being a prank. Then if I’m being honest, a part of me was like, what if this is a prank? But I quickly snapped out of it within seconds lol. Then I got another tumblr notification showing that the smosh mouth was premiering at I think it was 3 or 4 pm, and I completely forgot it was Monday. So if I recall correctly, it was still around 45 minutes away. So I tried to calm myself down (still haven’t lol) and I’m just still scrolling through everyone’s reactions until the time came. I go to the premiere and after a minute or two, the countdown started… when the podcast faded into angela dressed as Shayne, I’m not gonna lie, my heart sank. I truly believed they were talking about the wedding and doing a tell all. Looking back, that was absolutely hilarious, but at the time I was not laughing. Do you know how long that 45 minutes waiting for the podcast felt? It felt like 45 DAYS, so to get that I was very disappointed. But as it was going on, I started to ease up a bit and admit that they got me good. Then towards the end of the episode when Amanda and Shayne came in, I really thought they were gonna do another REAL hour of the pod, but they just stayed to end the video. My poor heart was really going through it that day. And the funny part of it is that there was a music award show I was planning on watching that came out like 2 hours later. Do you think I payed any attention to that? No. My brain was on shourtney the entire day year. I still can’t tell you how that award went lol. But anyway, I was just freaking out and I literally could not relax. I just kept going through everyone’s posts about it and my mind was just 100% Courtney and Shayne to 0% anything else. Then, at around 11 pm, Shayne posted this

I seen a lot of people say they thought this whole thing was fake bc they never kissed in any of the photos, so then he drops this. When I seen it, I felt like I just had seen the cutest group of puppies being adorable and my heart started fluttering. Since that I think was the last new post of that day, my story pretty much ends there. And if you’re wondering how I felt about the other stuff like the other batch of wedding photos, the celebration, and the bachelorette/bachelor party, it was pretty much the same thing, but on a bit tamer level bc nothing will ever beat how I felt April 1st. But yeah, I hope you enjoyed this, I tried to be as descriptive as possible so I know there’s a lot of details that could’ve been left out, but I wanted you to try to be immersed in how I felt as much as possible 😊👍

[jesncin]

i have so many feelings about Amanda Waller- not only because she's female and poc and frequently an antagonist, but because she's a fantastic Just Human character the JL go up against. the writers who make her evil I think do her character a huge disservice. the thing about her that is so interesting is that her being not superpowered is so integral to her character- she has completely understandable fears about the powered folk / vigilantes who have come about.

she starts off trying to keep civilians safe, and she becomes more and more twisted and diluted as she gets older and moves up the ranks in the US military (Classic and Well-known issue with becoming more and more removed from the 'battlefield' in question). and most importantly, she CHANGES. she keeps interacting with these heroes, the majority of whom keep choosing to do the right thing no matter the personal sacrifice, and she realizes how nuanced the situation is. she snaps out of this "They are bad and They will betray Us"

her experience of Ace (not the dog) with Batman is still one of my favorite flashback scenes ever in animation because the whole time you are intimately aware that this is a memory you are being told about, it never feels like a lore dump or weird exposition. goddd that episode is so good

Yes to all this! I can understand for short stories or even a film perhaps not going into her complex moral ambiguity yet but for sure if a whole series doesn't touch on the nuances of her beliefs and boil Waller down to "evil government boss in charge of the Suicide Squad" I feel that's really missing what makes her character so fascinating!

Even early on in DCAU's Justice League Unlimited, she's a thrilling character to watch because she isn't 100% against the League and will team up with them if their goals align.

Aah the iconic Ace (not the dog) flashback :') I love the scene in isolation not so much its context for defending Elder Bruce being cruel to Terry- but it is a very lovely bittersweet scene. A tender side to Bats I wish was kept in incarnations of the character.

[thesolaireslawyer]

Not Fair

TW - Cursing, If You Look Hard Enough Slight NSFW,

WC - 1072

AN- well here it is the long-awaited part 2 of David Shaw was paying attention! I hope it was worth the wait{ I couldn't remember if the cat was male or female- mb.. like a slight David x Asher type thing- matching word count was not intended}

It’s not fair. You should be here with me. You should be here. Smiling, laughing, and gossiping with Asher. You should be here! You should be annoying the shit out of me. You should be here. Angel.. I miss you so fucking much. God theirs so much I wish I could say..

But I'm reduced to say it right here. Over a gravestone with your name on it. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve come here. Every day is harder than it needs to be. Waking up without you in my arms hurts. My mind likes to convince me that you’re in the living room playing Minecraft. 

Funny enough.. I’ve been playing Minecraft more. I wanted to see what you loved about that game so much… angel the last thing I expected to see when I opened the world biome I started on. Was an entire pack of wolves..

I would have been offended to see the name, Davey.. But now the only thing I want is to hear you say it one more time. Run my hands over your body.. Had I known..God.. I just miss you so much.. Things are so much harder without you.

I haven’t spent the night in the house since your passing. It's too quiet.. The pack has taken to watching over me. Or sleepovers is what they’ve taken to calling it. I'm not the world's smartest man. But I'm not stupid either… even when you’re not here..

Talking to you is easy. It's a bit funny.. You get to meet my mom before I ever did. Micheal stopped by earlier, he couldn’t bring himself to come to the service. And he felt bad about it. 

I'm sure you wouldn’t have minded.. But he did drop off your cat.. The one I said I wasn’t going to take care of. His new partner is allergic to cats.. Originally he was going to give her to us after the trip.. But you know how that turned out.

So he gave her to me. And I’m starting to see why Milo keeps a cat. Though she’s a gremlin just like you…. Were… it’s nice having a reminder of you.. But the main reason for today's visit.. It will be the first day I'm spending the night alone back in the house. 

Of course, asher is trying to come over. He wants to make sure I eat. As if he could properly cook something. The last thing I'm going to let his ass do is burn the damn cabinets again. Though he’s been the biggest help.

He’s even been getting into fewer arguments with Christian.. However, I feel that's more of them building a good relationship. But I don’t know.. I haven’t been focusing on my alpha duties. I took a break from some of the jobs. Milo and Amanda have been covering for me. 

But I know I’ll have to get back to work soon. As much as I wished the world would stop so that I could permanently sit here and cry like I want to. I can’t.. I know I can’t.. I’m an alpha let alone the alpha of one of the strongest packs in Dahlia..

I’ll have to go soon..but I want to say sorry.. I know I wasn’t the best partner.. I was an ass, a prick.. Any name really. It’d probably fit. These words don’t mean much now that you’re gone. But I still needed you to hear them. 

But do I remember the things you have taught me. You’ve taught me things I needed to know. Things I’ve needed to grow. Angel, you still teach me things while you're gone. Your cat teaches me things too. I brought her a bed. But she likes to sleep in our bed..

Or well mine now. I think the reason I’ve been so scared to be alone in the house is because we got it together. It was supposed to be our forever home. But without you it’s quiet. And doesn’t feel like home.. Or at least our home anymore. 

Your memory haunts the place. Everywhere I go in that house. I get reminded of what I lost… what the world lost. I still remember the nights I had to force you to get off of that damn computer. You did so much for me. And yet I can’t return.. The favor… Angel something I’ve come to realize, as time passes..

Yes, I still think it’s not fair you got taken away. From the people you loved and cared about. Yes, it will be hard to live life without you. But.. what you’ve taught me is things will get better. 

I will keep opening up more.. I will keep living. You will never not be on my mind. But your memory has and will make me stronger.. And the pack has my back more than ever.. Sometimes I wonder if that's the influence you had on them..

They most definitely see through my bullshit now. I know that's something you taught them.. You and Ash.. learning to accept you’re gone hurts. It hurts a lot.. But..i know things will get better. Angel.. I love you. And I always will. 

David stands, brushing off his jeans and wiping the tears off his face. It was getting late and he needed to get home. His furry friend would be upset if he was late. He took one long look at the gravestone. Forget-me-nots were growing around it. He laughed a little as another tear rolled down his face. And made his way to his car. As got in the car and went to adjust the rearview mirror. 

He saw a familiar face.. With a matching smile. 

‘’ Good job Davey ‘’ 

And that moment he couldn’t help but break into tears.. And laughs. His angel would do something like this. Or find a way to do something like this. They’ve always been like that. He started the car and that face stayed for most of the ride. They even had a conversation.. Before he had to say goodbye for the final and last time. 

His angel was floating with the angels. And probably telling his mom all about him. As well as gossiping with his dad. Time will heal this wound. But for now, he’s allowed to grieve.

[dragon-creates]

I’m looking for an artist to collab with for an AU

Hello! If you don’t know me already, my name is Dragon, the author of the TADC fics 5+1 and Royally Screwed (and also a funnybunny shipper). However, I am coming up with a totally new AU, something similar to the carnival and freakshow au as well as inspiration from Bendy and the Ink Machine, Poppy Playtime and Amanda the Adventurer.

I call it ‘The Amazing Digital REDACTED’ au.

In this au, you ‘the player’ play as Jax, an ex-employee of C&A returning to the abandoned building in order to find the rest of your work employees after a mysterious incident years ago. With hidden knowledge that he must enter the game in order to find them, Jax does just that while managing to retain his memories. Along with his accomplice Bubble (a helpful AI who wants to free the rest of the trapped souls) and some help from his friend Winter (yes Winter from 5+1 will be in this but that fic isn’t canon to this au) on the outside, Jax tries to fix his past mistakes and save everyone – especially a particular jester he loved and lost long ago.

Yup that’s right, Jax will be the main character of this au and you will be playing as him. Let me explain, there is a feature on AO3 that allows you to make multiple choices on how you want the story to play out, like a telltale video game if you understand what I’m saying. You will get to pick and choose how Jax goes about his adventure and receive more than one ending (with a canon ending as well). And yes, this au’s main ship is funnybunny as I believe that it deserves more recognition and I find that these two in this au are very interesting to explore (especially with their past).

However, this fic is going to take quite a long time to make and is going to be bigger than anything else that I have written in the past. That is why I want to team up with a fellow TADC/funnybunny artist (since I am not an artist and do better with writing and characters) and create a separate blog for this au to come up with comics and art together. If you’ve seen the blogs for the Carnival and Freakshow au’s, you know that with their comics and art they explore more of the world, drop some lore, do character sheets and explain the pasts of the characters. This is what I’m hoping for if I team up with an artist. This au will mostly be on tumblr however if it does well I might add it to twitter as well since I’m putting this post on twitter as well.

Here are what I have pictured for the characters so far.

Jax: Past name; Jack. Ex employee of C&A, main character and who you the player will be playing as. Before the ‘incident’, Jax used to work at C&A as part of a coding team, to make sure that there were no bugs before any games were released. While C&A wasn’t on his list of jobs to pick, it was the only one that seemed best due to the pay and the fact that they could pay for schooling for those with children. Since Jax has a little sister named Jane, and has no parental figures in his life, he takes the job in order to help pay for the both of them and to make sure that Jane gets a good education. Unlike his canon TADC counterpart, Jax is more quiet, tired and while sarcastic, isn’t all out cruel to everyone unless they are bad people (think Mike from the FNAF movie especially with his relationship with his younger sister). He becomes quite close with his boss’s daughter however, Penny (Pomni) with him starting to develop feelings for the shy girl. However, after the day of the ‘incident’ Jax is left with nothing but guilt since he knew things that contributed to that day. Now he has a chance to make things right and save everyone, and Pomni.

Pomni: Past name; Penny. Ex employee of C&A and daughter of the CEO Abel, Pomni is an extremely introverted and socially awkward person, due to being traumatised by her mother’s death. She and her father don’t have a good relationship, with reasons that will become clearer later. She was quite close to the past version of Ragatha, but other than her father, she doesn’t really have a relationship with anyone. She likes to work alone to focus on the numbers and accounting part of her job (she understands numbers more than people) until she meets Jack. Though Jack is usually a bit standoffish, he is sweet to Penny due to her shy nature and helps keep an eye on her throughout their jobs so that she doesn’t feel too overwhelmed. Overcome by his sudden kindness and protectiveness, Penny starts to develop feelings for Jax. However, after the day of the ‘incident’ she is now trapped in the game, forever a jester trapped in a box…until Jax shows up.

If you’d like to be an artist for this au and collab with me, you can send me a DM or @ me. Do either of these and a sketch of the characters and I will reach out to you and confirm that you can be my partner for this project.

Here are some visuals on how I envision the characters.

Jax:

Sans the goggles, think of Jax wearing this over his grey and dirty overalls, he could also be holding a makeshift weapon like a bat or a stick so that he can fight off enemies. This version of Jax is much more serious and he is ready to fight in order to get the job done.

Pomni:

(on the last pic, focus on the makeup rather than the outfit)

Overly baggy and childish, with blue and black instead of blue and red. This design is a reminder of her past trauma and as so, is implemented into her circus features. Due to it being too big for her, it makes it hard for her to run and escape, and the ridiculousness of it all is a huge slap in the face that this is her new life now and is fully erased of her past.  Even the makeup covers up any kind of normalcy on her face.

Well that’s it for now, I hope you guys take this into consideration and I hope you all have a lovely day/afternoon/night.

[maddy-k-reads-all-day]

The Amanda Fic Lore

So you know how the games slowly reveal more about the character’s real lives as the tapes go on. Well unfortunately, I have no idea what the third, fourth or any other number of games in this series are going to do. So for my Amanda fic series, I’m going to make up my own lore. (mostly based on my interpretations of the characters so a lot of these are going to be similar to that post). I guess you could think of this as an AU cuz I’ll probably never get everything right. Just so you know I may edit this when I come up with more ideas.

Spoilers for the fics ig

Amanda: (We know plenty about her already so she’s not going to be that much different from the game.)

Rebecca Colton. 

Had morbid interests as a child long before Hameln.

Has a dark sense of humor

As Rebecca, she was genuinely a ray of sunshine to be around. (Even with morbid interests). 

Secretly has a dark sense of humor

Very adventurous 

Does not like her plans being changed

Loves to draw (we see it multiple times).

Has had past trauma before Hameln even entered the picture (Sam's despite what she's been through in reference to her adoption). 

Has some varying level of interest in goth/emo/punk style.

She doesn’t resent Sam. 

Wants to keep her memories of Sam and Kate close.

I saw a theory that maybe Rebecca was trying to get Sam and Kate together like maybe there were some sparks flying there. I really like that so it might be canon in this universe. 

She’s starting to lose hope that she’s going to escape. 

Starting to slowly trust Wooly again and be his friend again. 

Trying to learn to control her anger issues. 

The Amanda wiki says she is 7-8 years old. So that’s the age we’re gonna stick with for when she got stuck in the tapes. I’m going to go with 8.

Wooly: (I think it would be interesting if his human life was the opposite of Amandas.) 

Slowly developing anger issues (lol) 

Based on reader suggestions, human name for this fic series will be William Scott.

Was ten years old when trapped. A child actor like Amanda, has been working with Hameln longer than her. 

Was a child of a single mother who never wanted children. She tried to be loving at first but eventually gave up. Spends most of her time working or away. He ended up being a parentified older sibling and that’s why he acts so “mature” and seems so worried about safety. She ended up signing off his soul to Hameln in order to make money and basically get rid of him. So he has a bit of abandonment issues. 

He had a little sister, never saw her again after being sold off to Hameln. Doesn’t know if she met the same fate. They were very close. Amanda reminds him of her sometimes, even though they were very different. EDIT: You know what? Maybe it's cuz I really like angst, but what if Wooly's sister passed away instead? Like prior to Wooly being sent to Hameln. Like maybe in some sort of accident while they were playing when their mom wasn't home?)

Slowly remembering his past life (way slower than Amanda because he doesn’t want to remember). 

Doesn’t think they can escape.

Not exactly loyal to Hameln, but terrified of what will happen if they disobey. Slowly starting to not care anymore. 

Bottles up every negative emotion but is getting to a point where he can’t hold it in anymore. 

Starting to become more rebellious

Slowly repairing his relationship with Amanda

Hates being alone. 

Will avoid talking about uncomfortable subjects at all costs. Tends to be a bit controlling. 

His intentions are good. But let us remember what they say. The road to hell was paved with good intentions. 

He seems to be that one goody-two shoes friend in a friend group that's like: "We shouldn't do this." Even if it's objectively not that bad. 

Prone to panic or anxiety attacks.

And how do we feel about adding in the autistic head canon?

The Narrator is Sam

The "Owl" uses prerecorded voice lines of Kate, but cannot say anything else and isn't actually Kate. Why is she an owl? We'll have to wait and see...

Over time the more Amanda learns about Wooly the less afraid of her the demon will become.

Also, I think Wooly's demon will become less violent the less he keeps bottling things up. But it'll get worse before it gets better.

Once I get a couple tapes written I’m going to put them in an order that makes sense like some post that will be linked in the pinned post or whatever. But for now I’m gonna write them as the ideas come to me. If you have any Amanda fic lore to suggest, let me know. If I find it interesting I’ll add it in. 

Also these fics are completely separate from the School Shopping fic. 

As I said before, this isn’t necessarily what I think will happen in the games, it’s just some placeholder lore for me to use to build them around.

[owl-bites]

i'm gonna limit my thoughts on this idea to just the second game right now since i need to refresh my memory about the first game but i do like the theory that the butcher/meatman represents a doctor/surgeon.

i kinda agree but i think there's more to it because it feels like the meatman has an actual presence lurking within the tapes that doesn't seem to be attached to a soul, as far as we know yet anyway. it should be clear that it's only the souls of children trapped within the tapes (again, as far as we know) since thats what the company name Hameln implies. The pied piper specifically lured children and so do these demons.

the idea of the meatman only representing the memory of a doctor or an operation kind of throws this off unless he was supposed to be another demonic entity within the tapes as well. to me at least it seems like he has some kind of influence on things.

in my opinion he seems to react to emotion as well, fear in particular. There are two particular instances that stand out to me because both Amanda and Wooly are feeling scared prior.

first is in the "goodnight!" tape, if Riley doesn't bring Amanda a nightlight she tries to sleep despite how obviously scared she is, she even tells us that it's scary, which leads to a nightmare involving the meatman, Amanda wakes up screaming.

the second is in "when you're feeling bad" when you answer "horror, scary, etc" to Wooly's question. he's obviously uncomfortable with the answer and says they're too scary for him before we get a similar nightmarish sequence like Amanda's.

Wooly's sequence doesn't have meatman's visage like Amanda's does but the implication is there through the graphic snippets we see of meat tearing. the same door can be seen in both sequences except in Amanda's the door is red and in Wooly's its white. We can hear Wooly scream during this as well.

besides the imagery of pigs we see (i'm honestly still thinking on this) i think it's interesting that Amanda is asleep for this versus Wooly who is awake. these parallels imply to me that these sequences are supposed to be linked.

there's definitely more to the meatman than what we know and i wonder, even if it doesn't turn out to be the meatman, if we'll see a third demon. the hints for this are there, the number three is associated with demons and whenever we hear the names of these demons there's always three of them.

much to continue thinking on.

[vigilante-chase]

Summary: Part 3 of Every Rose Has its Thorn. Leota and Rose catch up after lost time, and Adrian has a bright idea.

Word count: 1.2K Words

Warning: None, other than a few changes to the chapter

Pairing: Adrian Chase x Rose Wilson

AO3, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

3. Dive Bar

Rose and Leota cackled obnoxiously as they took a trip down memory lane at the bar, only remembering the good times. The good times were all that mattered. The two went to a private school, and befriended each other when Leota was a new student. She was very quiet and friendly, and Rose knew that the other students would eat her alive. Rose was always a loner, people knew who her dad was, and decided they wanted no parts of her fucked up life. When she saw Leota, she instantly recognized her as Amanda Waller’s daughter, and her godsister as well.

They were like two peas in a pod, bonding over their parents’ rein over their lives. And now over ten years later, they’ve gotten back into the flow of things like nothing has ever changed. Rose felt guilty that she didn’t even get to see her best friend’s wedding, but knowing that Leota has found a beautiful wife like Keeya made her smile.

“What about you?” Leota asks, taking a sip of beer, shivering at the bitter taste. “Any lovers with any of the Titans?”

Rose laughed a humorless laugh, “A fling here and there. Nothing worth talking about.” She had a brief thing with Red Hood, but he ended things as quickly as they started. That left things awkward as they had to work together on missions after that. But the two got over it after a while, and became friends.

Adrian knew it was a bad idea, but he only wanted to make sure Rose and Leota were safe at the bar. He had taken Chris home, and drove all the way to the dive bar that the two women were chatting in. Quickly pulling his kevlar, undershirt, and pants off. He changed into his civilian clothes, and got out to walk to the door. He sighed nervously and adjusted his glasses before walking in, what he thought was a casual and confident strut, in reality was a bashful and nervous stride. He didn’t know what he’d say once he walked up to them, he may have overestimated his confidence in this moment. Leota stopped her conversation midway, gazing at him with wide eyes. To him, it was a look of excitement, when it was really her own nervousness. Rose turned in her seat to see what had Leota spooked. Adrian couldn’t read her expression, she was clearly getting a read on him. Hopefully, she wouldn’t recognize him as Vigilante. But she was friends with Leota, so of course she’s hella smart. Well, it’s now or never.

“Hi, Adebayo! Hi, Adebayo’s friend!” That sounds like a normal greeting, right. Rose gave a half-assed wave, toying with the rim of her beer and eyeing him suspiciously. He shifted under her intense gaze.

“Um, Hey…Adrian. What are you doing here?” Leota asked awkwardly, playing along with whatever game he was playing at. He couldn’t be serious, right? He was willing to follow them to this bar, and get his precious identity found out by Rose.

“I was just in the neighborhood, and decided ‘Hey, I should get a beer!’, and then I happened to see my good friend, Leota Adebayo. And hey, she happens to have a friend, the more the merrier!” He was nailing it perfectly. Rose smiled at him, hopefully a friendly smile. She raised her eyebrow at him, he wanted to get inside her head so bad. God, what was she thinking at this moment. She whispered something to Leota then got up and walked away. Leota looked at him incredulously.

“What the hell are you doing?” She asked him.

“I can’t have a beer after a really hard day?! Is that so wrong?” He asked.

“Yes, it’s wrong if you don’t want Rose to find out your secret identity.” He knew Leota was right, looking down with a soft whine. “I’ll help you keep it safe as much as I can, but Rose isn’t dumb. She’s her father’s daughter.”

Rose walked back to the table with another round of beers before Adrian could reply, staring at him intently as she sat down. “So, Adrian, was it?” She slid a beer in his direction as he nodded. “I’m Rose.” It was his shot, to act normal and keep it together.

“H-Hi, Rose.” He cursed himself for being so nervous. “So what brings you both here tonight?”

Leota looked at Rose, who smiled softly. Is she really falling for this? Stevie Wonder could tell that Adrian and Vigilante were the same person, and she’s not even putting two and two together. Rose leaned forward, crossing her arms over the table, her eyes piercing his. “We had a long day doing this task force bullshit, right Lee?” Leota nodded with pursed lips and a side eye towards her. Where was she going with this? “I had to get on a plane for over eight hours, to be around two absolute morons and kick some ass. But, hey, I’m still alive.”

Adrian looked to Rose then to Leota, “Uh…hopefully those two ‘morons’ were very cool and kicked just as much ass. Let’s say, hypothetically, one of those morons wanted to know if you thought he was cool and badass. Would you think he was…hypothetically speaking.” Leota rolled her eyes, putting her face in her palm.

Rose chuckled and winked at him, “See you tomorrow, Adrian.” With one last gulp of her beer, she stood up, “Ready to head out, Lee?”

“Yeah, more than ready.” Leota said, thanking the heavens that this awkward bullshit was over.

Adrian thought he was hitting it out of the park, maybe Chris should help him with his flirting. He was never good at it to be honest. Usually women flocked to him when he’s Vigilante, only after he’d save them from a mugging or some shit. Impressing Rose Wilson would be harder than he thought.

Leota was gonna just come out and say it, “Okay, what the hell was that back there?”

Rose laughed a maniacal laugh, but tried to hide it with an innocent face. “What? That? Oh, I was just making conversation. You didn’t tell me you were friends with such a cutie.” Leota almost swerved the car, she didn’t know what to feel. Disgust? Confusion? Adrian and cute in the same sentence definitely confused her. Well, only because she’s known him for a while now, and the cuteness fades after hearing him talk for five minutes.

“A cutie?” She asked.

Rose hummed, “Yep, I wonder if he’s seeing anybody?”

“Girl, what the fuck?” Leota was looking at her friend as if she didn’t know her. Adrian didn’t seem like her type, but she did tell her ‘people change’. “I mean, more power to you.”

Rose couldn’t hold in her cackle at this point, “Girl, I’m fucking with you! I knew it was Vigilante the whole time.” They both laughed at the absurdity. “You really think I couldn’t hear the cadence of his voice?”

Leota shook her head, pulling into the parking lot of the shitty hotel they both would be stationed at for the next twelve months. Going to the trunk to get the rest of her luggage out, she walked up to her door, unlocking it and dropping her bags in the middle of the floor. It was time to rest and get some decent sleep.