#i still look forward for it to post something new

[bbokicidal]

Ooh, it's a bad habit. | SKZ [OT8]

synopsis: "Bad" habits the boys have in relationships + in general.

Genre: Fluff I guess? Pairing: OT8 x GN!Reader Warnings: Mentions of arguing but nothing depicted Notes: I just enjoy making these types of posts and I'm feeling inspired at 5 AM (YET AGAIN) so enjoy!~

Chan:

Does not answer text messages. Opens it, reads it, gets distracted, does not come back to it until either eight hours later or until you double text him. Hit his ass with the "????" and he'll apologize but otherwise he'll just "oh."

Leaves his little snack wrappers on the kitchen counters. If you don't get to them first, he'll clean them up when he goes into the kitchen next. He just forgets about it in the moment; Man likes his snackies.

Bites the skin around his nails so his cuticles are Lowkey HORRIBLE but if you get him on a cuticle oil that smells nice, he's gonna be like a bitch with a new lipgloss applying that shit every ten minutes.

Hums a lot. Not a bad habit but not the nicest when you're on a phone call and you can hear him humming next to you.

Cannot control his face. Even grows a habit of making certain faces at you when you're either arguing or talking about something he's uncertain about. It annoys you to no end and he tries to stop but fails every time.

Lino:

Doesn't answer, period. You can talk to him for almost five minutes about a subject and he won't hear a single thing because he's on his phone. Selective hearing, apparently.

Will not do something if he does not want to - which can be good, obviously he shouldn't do something if he doesn't feel like it - but when you've made plans and he doesn't want to go last minute it can be really frustrating. He's also incredibly stubborn when it comes to this, too.

Very irritable most of the time, especially after he's just woken up. He will snap if you pester him too much about something but at this point you've grown to understand it's just how he is. He never says anything mean, he never yells, it's just a light raise of his voice and something along the lines of, "Yes, okay! I'll get to it when I get to it!"

Glances at his watch way too fucking much. Man is constantly keeping track of the time - which leads to him complaining that he looked at his watch earlier and it said 4:50, looked at his watch two seconds ago and now it says 4:51.

Doesn't like being at events longer than he's supposed to be. If y'all have dinner with the group and he was ready to go home forty minutes ago, he's going to be pouting and rolling his eyes those entire forty minutes.

Changbin:

Talks with his mouth full. It's cute, because his cheeks pudge out and his lips are all pursed and pouty - but he does it a lot. Especially if someone argues with him while he's eating, he's gonna be pointing and yelling back and food's gonna be flying.

Not a bad habit but purses his lips and expects kisses from you. You know what it means now and always kiss him when you see him do it but at the beginning of your relationship it confused the hell out of you. Why was he making duck lips at you?

Crosses and uncrosses his legs like no other. Sometimes the man cannot sit still in his seat and the moment you notice it, it Lowkey drives you insane. But he also can't cross his legs at his thighs because they're thicker than Hell AND he's got a third leg in the middle so he's always just crossing his ankles and kicking his feet out.

Sitting forward/slouching. Changbin. Cannot. Sit. Up. Straight. ^ Going off the prompt above, he's literally always sitting forward with his elbows on his knees or sitting back in his seat and leaning. It's not horrible but sometimes if he's in interviews or going to award shows you have to remind him to sit up.

Toys with things that are sitting in front of him. He needs stimulation with his hands so if he's got his phone, he's turning it over in his hands; If he's sitting in front of a candle, he's waving his finger over the open flame like an idiot.

Hyunjin:

Picks at his nail polish. He always does the cutest designs and he knows you love when he paints his nails but five seconds later he's either biting at them when he gets anxious or he's picking at the polish until it chips off. He never gets good photos, either.

Chews on his drawing pencils, which is why he's always buying new art supplies. Luckily he gets gifted drawing utensils from a lot of brands he works with on Holidays and his birthday - but a lot of his pencils go to shit because he gnaws on them while he's thinking about his art piece.

Checks his phone a lot. He wants to see if he has messages from you so he's always peeking at his notifications in eager waiting, but if he's with you he's also checking his group chat notifications from he boys. It's not bad, but gets annoying on dates.

Leaves his clothes everywhere. His room is always messy with little piles of clothes and when you move in together, your shared room becomes the same way. He gets better about it when you get on his ass but up until then he's just throwing his shit everywhere.

Twirls his hair around his fingers. Not a bad habit but funny when you pick up on it. He's doing it all the time when he's listening in on conversations, and while he does it he's pursing his lips. Just a drama queen judging other drama queens.

Jisung:

Talks with his hands. He gets real flappy when he's arguing and bickering with people, and he's come real close to hitting you a few times when he stands up from the couch to argue with Hyunjin on the other end. He always apologizes but it'll never stop.

Rubs his eyes a lot, which you have to remind him is bad for 1) his skin, and 2) the company will yell at him. He's gotten better when he's wearing makeup because he doesn't want to mess it up but when he's at home he's always rubbing his face.

Stuttering/Stammering. Especially if you're bickering or you catch him off guard, he cannot get a damn comment out to save his life. He'll try, say the word four times wrong, and then stop to think and then completely lose the thought altogether.

Constantly apologizing. The man is apologizing for everything under the Sun; Being behind you when you move away from the fridge, bumping into you while you do laundry, saying sorry for cutting you off while talking. Most of the things are no big deals and it can get a little frustrating, but it's also a tad endearing.

His eyebrows do not have an off switch. They are always moving. He speaks with his hands, his mouth, and his eyebrows. Which ties into him, most of the time, not being able to control his expressions. Not that he wants to.

Felix:

Messy eating. Man needs like eight napkins when he's eating chicken wings, he fuckin' flies through them like crazy. He's the type that's got sauce all over his fingers, his mouth, staining his chin. He can't help it though and it is kind of cute. Just don't let him near too many finger foods.

Touches his hair all too much. Sometimes he complains his hair looks greasy or messed up and you have to remind him that every five minutes he's pushing it back with his hands - which is why it grows oily so fast. Always pushing it behind his ears, pulling it down over his forehead, touching the ends behind his neck.

Swears like a sailor. Bro has the biggest potty mouth in the group and cannot control it when he gets angry. Most used words are: Wank, Fuck, Shit, and Asshole.

Claps at everything. Not in the verbal way; He actually claps. He claps when he laughs, he claps when someone does something successfully, he claps when he's tired and ready to go to bed. Has a habit of clapping once before he starts talking, usually a "*clap* Alright, well -"

Winks. Wink, wink. Always winking at people. Not strangers, though - Just you and the guys, and on occasion a security guard escorting him through the airport. An eternal flirt who cannot help himself. A natural charmer.

Seungmin:

Rubs the tip of his index finger against the side of his thumb and subsequently gains a callus from it because he can't fucking stop. It doesn't really matter nor does it effect his daily life but it's a little annoying when he's playing guitar. But it also.. kind of.. helps.

Speaking of ^ Brings his guitar everywhere he can. If he is going somewhere and knows he'll have free time to practice or play, he's bringing it with even if it's taking up space in the car and people are tripping over it. That thing goes with him everywhere.

Has a very bad habit of standing and staring - except it's less staring and more glaring. He's not doing it on purpose, nor is he always mad - He just had a perfect RBF and can't help it. But he's always tipping his head down, his eyes are always dark, he's never smiling unless he's actively like - trying. He's just kind of scary. Scary guard dog.

Taps his foot a lot. Not annoying, not a hinderance - just a habit that ends up making his ankle and the top of his foot hurt because he is constantly doing it. It becomes a game though if you pick up on it - He'll tap his foot to a rhythm and you have to guess the song, which is a lot harder than you expect.

Sniffs. Sniffles. Sniffing everything. One of those people who, if he opens something new, sniffs it immediately - even if it isn't food or something that will smell good. Sniffs it anyways.

Jeongin:

Twists the rings he wears around his fingers. Most of them are higher quality and from fancy ass brands so it doesn't matter, but every once in a while he gets a slightly shittier ring and when he twists it, it turns his finger green. And then he ends up pouting while he tries to wash the stain out of his skin.

Constantly licking his lips but not in the way you're thinking. He does this thing specifically where he pushes the tip of his tongue into the corner of his lips while they're parted and then caresses it. With his tongue. He does it a lot and when you pick up on it, you stare every time he does it subconsciously because it is so sexy.

Pulls at his bottom lip when in heavier conversations. Not even heavy topics - just intense or interesting convos. They could be talking about aliens and if he's in deep and thinking about conspiracies and shit, he'll pulling at the skin of his lip. More of a thinking habit than anything but he ends up using tons of chapstick afterwards.

Sticks his tongue out when he gets scolded or complimented. Anytime a comment is directed at him, he sticks his tongue out briefly before smiling. It's more of a teasing habit because it riles the other members up and flusters you - so. He gets away with it.

Pulls childish moves during arguments; Pouts when you're angry with him for something, rolls hie eyes when he's frustrated, puffs his cheeks out when he's thinking of how to retaliate. And absolutely says "Ooh you wanna kiss me so bad!!" when the two of you are bickering.

Permanent Taglist :

@dwaekkicidal @possum-playground

@thatonedarkskinnedsiren @oc3anfloor @theyadorevalerie

@jeonginsleftcheek @pixie-felix @hwangjoanna

[cheekytv]

have you ever tried... this one? - g. a. clarke & c. m. dixon going to paris with your boyfriend was supposed to be a romantic getaway. but when chris gets dumped, george can't help but ask his best mate to join in. how great of chris that he offers you sabrina carpenter tickets as compensation.... and somehow becomes involved in after concert activites...

pairing: george x f!reader x chris genre: smut MDNI!!! warnings: threesome, eifeltower, creampie, cum swallowing, fingering, oral (m. receiving), loads of kissing, let me know if i missed anything wc: 3.6k a/n: this is obviously inspired by sabrina's second paris concert... i wanna thank my friend val for giving me this idea!!! i love u queen!! also this isn't fully proof read because i worked on this for days and just wanted to post something for yall! requests are still open by the way and i will publish an arthurtv one next week <3 also, if you read to the end you may suggest who in the friendgroup should be next!

Oh Paris, the city of love. The city you love. Growing up in sad grey England, Paris has been your favorite place to be since you were a child. 

And this week, you finally got to show it to your boyfriend, George. You have been dating for a good year now, but his busy schedule has never really allowed any trips to Paris - until now. The minute he had confirmed the dates with you, you had booked everything, ready to make George fall in love with Paris the same way you had made him fall in love with him. 

Just that, a few days before the trip, Chris, George’s best friend, got dumped by his new girlfriend rather harshly and George, the nice guy he is, promptly suggested he’d join you on this trip. Chris, obviously feeling bad, but also not wanting to miss out on a nice week in Paris, tried to win you over by scoring three Sarbina Carpenter tickets and giving them to you as a thank you. Safe to say - he did win you over. 

So, Paris was now a three-person trip and Chris somehow became a third wheel who didn’t necessarily feel like a third wheel. Every shop you went to, he gave George and you space, very good at entertaining himself (he was a grown man, sure, but it still did surprise you) and joining the two of you at the right moments. Even with him there the trip felt romantic and considering he had a separate hotel room, George and you still had the nights all to yourself. 

The night of the Sabrina concert finally came and when you entered the arena and went to the seats Chris had gotten the three of you, you smirked, thinking about what you had promised George at breakfast this morning. 

“Oh, just a heads up,” you started, leaning over so your lips were right by George’s ear, “the position she chooses tonight, we’ll also choose tonight.” George’s face lit up, his cheeks turning slightly pink. 

“You always have such wonderful ideas, darling.” He grinned then, watching you sit back down and chuckle, eyes glancing over to Chris who was just about to reach your table.

The plan would have been fine, would have been dandy, would have been the perfect thing to look forward to after the concert - if only Sabrina hadn’t chosen this night in Paris to debut a position involving dancers. Plural. Two dancers. 

George, sitting next to you and Chris, felt his mouth drop open at the display. Next to him, he felt Chris tense slightly - he had told his best friend about your suggestion during a walk earlier and Chris had happily anticipated this moment with his friend, being supportive as always. But this? George shifted on his feet, the arena obviously filled with shouts and screams and people singing the lyrics to Juno and he couldn’t bring himself to look at you. 

Honestly, he didn’t even understand why this had such an impact on him. Why it was suddenly so hard to look at you and why he found himself thinking thoughts he hadn’t thought of seriously before. Little did he know that you were going through the exact same scenarios as him. 

Could this really just be a coincidence? There were two Paris concerts, yesterday, she had done the whole thing with smoking a cigarette after sex and today, the show Chris had gotten tickets for unexpectedly, she did the bloody Eifeltower? It felt a bit too targeted. 

And if you were honest with yourself… Chris wasn’t unattractive, more so the opposite. Even being shorter than George, you were still smaller than him, so it didn’t really make a difference to you anyway. He was handsome and funny, kind and lean, with muscles in the right places - not to mention his insane talent at football. So, yeah, perhaps the thought had crossed your mind once or twice. You were just a girl after all. A girl with eyes and your boyfriend just so happened to have a friend group filled with attractive men. 

Slowly, you managed to get back to the here and now, your focus back on Sabrina on the stage, the thoughts of what the position choice would mean for later tonight vanishing from your mind for the time being. 

–

The drive back to the hotel was… just slightly awkward. You managed to keep up the conversation, talking about how great Sabrina was live and how spectacular her show was. Sure, the elephant in the room was right there and both George and Chris had sweaty hands (even though Chris didn’t even know why he was so nervous. It wasn’t like he and George had ever discussed anything like this… at least not seriously) not able to look at each other throughout the whole drive. 

By the time you walked up the stairs to the hotel, your words had dried up. Instead they made room for slight anxiety and insecurity. Walking to the elevator in silence, you were happy to see no one else was in it with you. 

“Okay, we gotta address it.” You shit out the second the elevator doors closed. George and Chris exchanged a quick look before letting their eyes fall onto you. 

“Darling,-“ George started, but you interrupted him.

“No, listen. Obviously, I didn't know she’d do… that position today.” You crossed your arms and tried to ignore your burning cheeks. “We don’t- this doesn’t have to be anything, it’s just- it’s not like I haven’t thought about it- I-“,

“You thought about it?” George raised his brows and was surprised by the lack of jealousy arising within him. Instead, he felt a strange sense of arousal cursing through him. The joke about him and you having a possible threeway with any of his friends had come up plenty of times - even in videos, but he had never considered them an actual possibility. Sure, the thought had… somehow got him excited, but he hadn’t even dared to bring it up with you, too scared of a negative reaction. And now you were revealing that you had in fact thought about it?

Chris, next to George, felt his eyes widen and his heart speeding up, his palms growing sweatier. You had thought about this? About him and George… his cheeks heated up and he let his gaze wander between you and your boyfriend, not allowing himself into the conversation just yet. 

George’s question had caught you off guard, mainly because you hadn’t even realised your own slip-up. A pit in your stomach opened up and your brain worked hard to come up with a clever answer, but unfortunately came up empty.

“I-”, you began, feeling sweat forming on your forehead, “I mean, I don’t- I didn’t-,”

“Because I have, too.” George interrupted you again, his hand finding yours, pulling you closer, “in fact, we have… talked about this before.” He looked over at Chris, who still stared at the two of you like a semi-lost puppy. 

Now this you hadn’t expected. Behind you, the doors pinged, signaling you reaching your floor. The three of you kept standing inside the elevator in anticipating silence for another moment. Even with no words being exchanged there seemed to be an understanding hanging between you. Swallowing, you finally turned to move out of the elevator, the two men following you. George was still holding your hand, his heartbeat echoing in his ears. 

Reaching the hotel room, George let go of your hand and got out his wallet, the keylock for the room beeping a few seconds later. There were still no words exchanged, only your breathing audible in the silence as George opened the door and Chris and you followed him inside. Neither of you knew how this was going to go. How you were going to even start this. A threesome had never been on your bucket list, at least not officially. And it certainly hadn’t been on your bucket list for this trip. 

The heavy hotel room door fell shut behind you and all of you slowly discarded your jackets and shoes, making your way further into the room. The atmosphere changed as soon as the bed came into view, the king size suddenly looking way too small for the two people who had shared it the last three nights. Your heart was pumping and your blood was rushing in your ears, your eyes finally finding Georges.

“Should we sit?” He asked then, pointing to the bed and you and Chris nodded, walking over and sinking down onto the mattress. 

You were in between them now. Both your thighs touching theirs, all of your pulses quickened and all senses heightened. 

“So, just to clarify,” Chris now said, rubbing his sweaty palms along his jeans as if to dry them, “we are all cool with this?” 

George and you nodded, heads turned to the blonde man. 

“Are you cool with it?” You carefully asked him, gaze set on his handsome features. 

Now, it was Chris who nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m cool with this.” Even with his cheeks all rosy, he sounded determined. George on your other side, felt the corners of his mouth twitch upwards. God, he was really about to share the girl he loved with his best friend, how utterly strange and appealing at the same time. 

“Well then…,” you licked over your lips nervously, your gaze falling from Chris’ eyes to his lips. Adrenaline shot through you when you felt Chris leaning in, his breath hot on your face when he finally closed the gap between you two. 

He tasted and felt different than George, his lips a little bit softer than your boyfriends. Chris was cautious at first, but when you moved your head and switched up the angle, he dared to let his tongue run over your bottom lip, his hand finding its way onto your cheek. You gladly accepted his tongue sliding into your mouth, your own meeting and letting him take the lead. The kiss deepened and you leaned in closer to Chris, your head feeling dizzy. 

George watched, his mouth slightly dropped. Nothing could have prepared him for the way he felt watching you with someone else. A part of him felt guilty for not being jealous, for not wanting you all to himself. But that all faded away when he heard your soft gasp when Chris bit down on your bottom lip, when he felt the heat radiating off your body. He leaned forward, his hands pushing your hair over your shoulder, leaving your neck bare for him to gently caress and finally kiss. 

Feeling both of them kissing you caused another moan against Chris’ lips, your own hands now moving to both of their napes, fingers curling into their hair. Electricity sparked with every touch, every kiss, every breath. Turning your face, you now kissed George on the lips, giving Chris the chance to devour your neck with his lips, sucking and kissing your soft skin. 

Every kiss with George somehow felt like the first one, filling your stomach with butterflies and happiness. All that slowly faded into heat now, blatant heat that needed to be set free, that demanded to be heard and taken care of. You gasped into his mouth when he let his hands wander underneath your shirt, both men shortly parting from you so he could pull it over your head and throw it onto the floor. They dove right back into kissing you, George’s hands now exploring your freed skin, fingers tracing the cups of your bra and finally moving to the clasp on your back, letting it clip open. Chris moved to kiss your shoulders, his hands sneaking around your waist and finding your button and zipper, opening both so his hand could glide into your jeans. Your legs moved to open wider almost automatically, more moans leaving your body when you felt Chris’ fingers on your drenched core. 

“Fucking hell.” Chris groaned, his fingers circling your clit over your panties. “You’re so wet already, darling.”

“God, Chris, I don’t think your ready for her perfect pussy,” George smirked as he kissed down your neck, your bra now discarded next to your shirt on the floor. His lips closed around your right nipple and your head tilted back, right onto Chris’ shoulder. Chris, who now moved to get the rest of your clothes off. 

“Unfair.” It truly was - both men were still fully dressed while you were about to be fully naked. They both chuckled, exchanging a quick glance before getting rid of their shirts. Your eyes feasted on the bare torsos of your two lovers for the night. Biting down on your bottom lip, you moved to look at Chris, your one hand running over his abs, while the other found George’s nape. 

You dove back into it then. Chris’ lips on yours in a hot and passionate kiss, while George was kissing your neck and back. With every passing second you grew needier, your pussy throbbing even with Chris back inside your panties with his fingers, circling your clit with expertise. The soft sounds coming out of your mouth drove both of them crazy, their cocks straining against their trousers. 

Quickly, they moved to get naked as well, the three of you getting cozier in the middle of the bed, your body pressed between theirs. Spreading your legs, you hooked one each around theirs, letting both men take their turns to kiss your neck and lips, George’s long fingers inside of you, pumping you open for one of their cocks, while Chris’ thumb was back on your clit, pressing down as he moved it in perfect circles. The sensation made your heart race and your body tingle, every touch better than the last. There wasn’t anything that could make you stop right now, not even the end of the world. If this was how you died - so be it. 

“Who do you want where, darling?” George finally whispered into your ear, his middle and forefinger still thrusting into you, hitting you right where you needed it most. Words were hard to form with both men on you, but you somehow managed to whimper that you really wanted to suck Chris’ cock first. 

Chris felt himself twitch against your thigh, groaning into your neck.

“Fuck, yeah, let’s do that.”

You found yourself on your hands and knees seconds later, Chris kneeling in front, George behind you. Chris' hand was caressing your face, his pupils blown as he stared down at you with nothing but admiration and hunger in his eyes. He brushed his thumb against your lips.

“Suck, darling.” He commanded in a whisper and you obliged immediately, your lips parting to suck his thumb into your mouth. His breath hitched, feeling your tongue twirl around his digit. 

“What a good, good girl.” He mumbled and George, currently feeling up your ass and enjoying the view of your glistening folds, smirked proudly.

“Yeah, she’s always so fucking good. Likes to be told what to do, too.” He squeezed your right cheek, before getting his hand around his cock, stroking it a few times. “Are you ready for me, my love?” He asked then and you nodded, whimpering around Chris’ thumb.

George moved right away. His tip breached your sensitive hole and your eyes rolled back when he began to sink into you, every inch of him feeling nothing short of delicious. George’s cock was girthy and by now you would have expected to be used to how he stretched you, but no, it was a perfect new experience every time. Chris wasn’t as wide as George, but slightly longer, his angry red tip staring at you, taunting you with the sticky pre cum about to drop onto the duvet. Looking up at Chris with big eyes now, trying to signal him that his thumb was not enough anymore.

And even though this was the first time Chris and you were intimate like this, he seemed to get it right away. His eyes met yours and sparkled with more hunger than before, his thumb leaving your mouth and instead bringing his hand around his cock, leading it to your awaiting mouth. Breathing heavily, his tip bumped against your outstretched tongue, the softness making him moan. You hungrily licked away his pre-cum, revelling in his taste.

“Shit, you’re so hot.” Chris groaned, his cock now sliding inside your mouth. Every inch that got engulfed by your warmth already brought him closer to the edge, his eyes rolling back when his tip reached the back of your throat. 

Just then, George finally bottomed out, his throbbing cock feeling right at home in your tight walls. His hands gripped your waist, grounding himself in the familiarity of your body. His first thrust was firm and controlled and caused you to almost fall forward, Chris’ cock gliding even deeper down your throat. He gasped audibly, his hands moving to your head, fingers grabbing your hair. Hollowing out your cheeks, you moved your head up and down his shaft, tongue pressing against his undersite and gliding over his tip whenever you moved back. 

With every thrust, George felt himself nearing his climax, his fingers digging into your skin. There were little things George enjoyed more than being with you. To him, you were perfect, everything about you was perfect. The way you arched your back when he tasted you, the way you squeezed his cock just like right now, hinting at your own climax being close. He loved the way you listened to his every word, how you aimed to please and be pleased, how you kissed him every chance you got. And this, right now, you almost choking on his best friend’s cock, being so goddamn good for them… a part of him was worried about missing this, about missing you with a cock in your mouth while he fucked you, about wishing he could hear your gagged moans, about almost losing his mind over the way you pulsated around him, so turned on by Chris inside your throat. 

“You’re doing so well, darling, I am so proud of you.” He purred, his hands gently caressing your backside. 

“Yeah, Georgey is right, pet, you’re really doing so fucking well.” Chris licked his lips, watching your eyes sparkle with tears. “Can I fuck your mouth?” He asked then, breathlessly and you nodded immediately. Relieved, Chris looked over at George who gave him an encouraging grin. That was all he needed. Both of your consent. 

The two men didn’t hold back then. In almost perfect unison they began to thrust, one cock hitting your sweet spot perfectly, while the other went so deep down your throat you thought to see stars. Never had you felt so full before, your eyes rolling back in pleasure, muffled moans around Chris’ cock sending vibrations through the blonde man. He groaned, fingers digging into your scalp as he lost himself completely in his pleasure. 

George knew it wasn’t going to take long anymore, his cock beginning to twitch over and over inside you, feeling your soft walls tightening around him.

“Are you gonna come for us, darling? Gonna come all prettily on my cock?” His hips picked up the pace and you felt tears streaming down your cheeks, the pleasure almost too much to handle. And when George sneaked a hand between your legs and let his thumb press down harshly on your clit - there was no stopping it. Your orgasm hit you like a hard wave, your body shaking while your moans got drowned out by the sound of skin on skin, wet and perfect and filthy. Chris was thriving on the way your throat vibrated around him, closing in on his orgasm. 

“Good girl, so fucking good.” Every wave of your orgasm brought George closer to his own and when he finished fucking you through your high, he finally reached his. Gripping onto your hips for dear life, he moaned your name once, twice and emptied inside you, thick ropes of cum painting your insides white, leaving you hot and satisfied. 

“Fuuuck, you’re perfect.” Chris watched your eyes rolling back forward and when he saw the longing look in them, he couldn’t help but fall over the edge, cursing under his breath while his own load shot down your throat, your lips sucking hungrily, not wanting to waste even one drop of him. You milked him of all he had and only when he pulled out and fell backwards, did you swallow it all, falling on top of him with George landing on your back. 

The three of you needed a good five minutes to recover from this, both men sticky with sweat the same way as you. 

They finally got up, George getting you and them clothes to change into (He gave Chris a set of his own) and Chris bringing a washcloth from the bathroom to carefully clean you up. Giggling, you thanked him, pressing a soft kiss to his lips before excusing yourself to go to the bathroom yourself (always pee after sex!). 

George and Chris got dressed in a comfortable silence, only exchanging a look when they were both clothed and sitting on the bed, backs resting against the headrest.

“So,” George started, “should we tell the others?” He asked and Chris clicked his tongue.

“I think that’s up to you, mate. But,” his eyes darted to the bathroom you were still in, “if you do tell them, do not be surprised if they beg you to be next.”

George looked at him for a few seconds. Then, he grinned. 

“You know what? I might not even hate that idea.”

[sofiatarot]

How can you take care of yourself more? What's your soul needing from you right now? PAC

TIP JAR - FREE READINGS - PAID READINGS

Hii loves! I know it’s been a while since my last post, but I’ve been really busy with college stuff. I’ve missed sharing with youuu, and I truly hope you love this theme as much as I do. I felt like it was something not only I needed, but also you—the ones reading this, right?

Sometimes, life gets so busy with responsibilities and worries that we forget to check in with ourselves. So, this is just a little reminder (wrapped in lots of love!) to pause, breathe, and come back to yourself.

Take a moment to look at the photos, see which one calls to you the most. Breathe, focus, and trust your intuition—it will guide you to the message meant for you.

Sending you all so much love and light. Thank you for being here, for your presence, and for sharing this space with me. I appreciate you more than you know!🤧✨️

1//2

3//4

Group 1

I see a deep longing for connection and freedom within you. The star tells me that you are guided, that there’s hope, and that you have a bright energy that can inspire others. But with the 2 of cups and the fool together, I sense a need to embrace new relationships or allow yourself to experience love and connection more freely. There’s something about stepping into the unknown with an open heart. However, the 2 of wands reversed shows hesitation—like you're afraid to fully commit to a path. Are you holding back from making a choice that could bring you closer to what you desire?

The knight of swords and wheel of fortune indicate that change is coming, fast and unexpectedly. This shift is likely to push you in a new direction, whether you’re ready or not. The knight moves forward with intense energy, almost recklessly. Your soul is craving momentum, but I get the sense that there’s also a lesson in surrendering to fate. You can’t control everything, and resisting change might only make things harder. Trust the cycles of life.

Now, looking at how you can take better care of yourself, the ace of swords reversed suggests confusion or mental fog. Maybe you’re overthinking or struggling to find clarity. Your mind needs rest, and forcing yourself to have all the answers right now isn’t helping. Give yourself permission to slow down.

The queen of wands and temperance are beautiful reminders of balance and self-confidence. You need to nurture your inner fire, your creativity, and your self-expression while also finding peace within yourself. The queen tells me you are powerful, magnetic, and capable of so much, but temperance asks you to pace yourself. Are you pouring too much energy into one area of your life and neglecting another?

The high priestess reversed suggests a disconnection from your intuition. It’s like your inner voice is trying to tell you something, but you’re not listening—or maybe you don’t trust it. You might be distracted by outside influences or doubting your own wisdom. Your soul is asking you to reconnect, to listen, and to trust yourself more deeply.

With the king of swords reversed, I see another message about mental clarity. There could be someone in your life—maybe even yourself—who is being overly critical, cold, or detached. Be mindful of negative self-talk or allowing someone else’s harsh words to shape your reality. You don’t have to have all the answers right now. Instead of forcing logic, try to embrace your emotions and intuition.

Overall, your soul is asking for trust—trust in yourself, in the universe, and in the natural flow of life. It’s okay to take risks, to step into the unknown, and to let go of control. The path ahead might not be completely clear, but the more you listen to yourself and honor your own rhythm, the more everything will fall into place.

Breathe, allow, and believe.

Group 2

There’s a feeling of resilience in your energy. The 9 of wands tells me you’ve been through a lot, and even though you’re still standing, you might feel exhausted. You’re in a place where you know you have to keep going, but something inside you is wary, guarded. The knight of wands shows this push-and-pull energy—you want to move forward, chase something exciting, maybe even take a risk, but part of you is still on edge, bracing for another challenge.

Strength is here to remind you that you are more powerful than you think. But this isn’t about brute force—it’s about patience, inner balance, and learning how to work with your emotions rather than against them. The knight of pentacles brings a different kind of energy from the knight of wands—he’s slow, steady, methodical. This tells me that while part of you craves excitement and momentum, another part of you needs stability. Maybe your soul is asking you to find a middle ground.

The 3 of cups and 8 of cups feel like two opposing energies. There’s a longing for connection, for celebration, for being surrounded by people who uplift you. But at the same time, something feels off. The 8 of cups suggests walking away from something that no longer serves you, even if it once brought joy. Are you staying in a situation—whether friendships, work, or even a mindset—out of comfort, when deep down, you know it’s time to move on?

Now, let’s look at how you can take care of yourself better. The chariot tells me that you have a strong will, and you’re capable of overcoming anything. But with the 9 of swords, there’s a lot of anxiety beneath the surface. You might be pushing forward so forcefully that you’re ignoring what’s weighing on you emotionally. Are you running towards something, or running away? Your soul is asking you to pause and acknowledge what’s keeping you up at night.

The queen of pentacles reversed suggests that you might be neglecting your own needs, whether physically, emotionally, or even financially. There’s a lack of grounding here—maybe you’ve been giving too much to others, or maybe you’ve been focusing on external validation rather than taking care of yourself. Your body and mind need nourishment.

Again, the high priestess reversed shows up, just like in group 1, which tells me that you might not be listening to your intuition. There’s inner wisdom trying to reach you, but distractions, doubts, or external influences are clouding your judgment. The moon reversed reinforces this—it’s about illusions being lifted, truth coming to the surface, but also the fear of seeing things as they really are. What are you avoiding?

Your soul is asking for clarity, for stillness, for a moment to breathe and truly listen. You don’t have to have all the answers right now, but you do need to stop ignoring what your inner self is trying to tell you. There’s something you need to release—whether it’s fear, self-doubt, or even a situation that’s no longer aligned with you.

The road ahead is yours to take, but before you rush forward, take a moment to check in with yourself. You are stronger than you think, but strength also means knowing when to rest, when to trust, and when to let go.

Group 3

Your reading feels intense, like you’re in the middle of a major transformation. The moon shows confusion, uncertainty—maybe even illusions that are keeping you from seeing things clearly. There’s something hidden beneath the surface, something that hasn’t fully revealed itself yet. And with the 3 of pentacles reversed, I get the sense that there’s a struggle in teamwork or collaboration. Are you feeling unsupported? Or maybe you’re doubting whether the people around you are truly aligned with your path?

Then, we have death, which tells me that a chapter in your life is closing. This isn’t something to fear—this is necessary. Something needs to be released so that you can step into a new version of yourself. But temperance comes right after, reminding you that this change isn’t about rushing into something new. Your soul is asking for patience, balance, and trust in divine timing. Whatever is shifting right now is meant to bring you into alignment.

And then we have judgment and justice—two powerful cards that speak about truth, awakening, and karmic balance. Judgment is that moment of realization, where you can no longer ignore what you’ve known deep down all along. Justice ensures that things will work out fairly, even if it doesn’t seem like it right now. The energy here feels big, like you’re at a crossroads where you have to make a decision that will impact your future in a meaningful way.

Now, let’s look at how you can take care of yourself better. The page of wands reversed suggests a blockage in your creative energy or your motivation. Maybe you’ve been feeling stuck, unsure of which direction to take, or even losing excitement for something you once loved. The 2 of wands tells me you’re looking at your options, but with hesitation. It’s like you’re standing at the edge of a decision but afraid to fully commit.

The 3 of swords and 5 of pentacles show pain, loss, and a feeling of being left out in the cold. There’s emotional or even financial hardship here—something that has wounded you deeply. Your heart is healing from something, and it’s important to acknowledge that pain rather than push it away. But then, the 10 of pentacles appears, reminding you that stability and abundance are possible. It’s like a message that even though you’re in a difficult phase, there’s a long-term vision waiting for you. Your soul wants you to remember that what you’re going through now is temporary—it’s leading you to something solid and lasting.

The queen of cups reversed is asking you to check in with yourself emotionally. Have you been ignoring your feelings? Have you been giving too much to others without taking care of yourself? This is a call to nurture your inner world, to reconnect with your emotions in a way that feels safe and healing.

Right now, your soul is craving honesty, clarity, and a willingness to embrace change. The transformation you’re experiencing is not easy, but it’s necessary. You are being guided toward something better, something more aligned with who you truly are. Trust yourself, allow the process to unfold, and remember that on the other side of this transition, there is a new beginning waiting for you.

Group 4

There’s a strong sense of exhaustion in your reading. The 9 of wands reversed shows that you’ve been fighting for something for a long time, but now, it feels like you’re at your limit. Maybe you’re questioning if it’s even worth it anymore. The 9 of swords reversed tells me that anxiety, stress, or sleepless nights have been weighing you down. It seems like you’ve been trying to move forward, but with the 6 of swords reversed, something is holding you back. Are you clinging to a situation that is no longer serving you?

The king of swords reversed suggests a lack of clarity or even dealing with someone who is manipulative, cold, or controlling. But then, the king of cups appears, bringing emotional wisdom and stability. These two energies feel like a battle between logic and emotion—are you overthinking when you should be trusting your heart? Or are you letting emotions cloud your judgment when you need to be more rational?

The hierophant tells me that structure, tradition, or spiritual guidance is important right now. Maybe you need to seek wisdom from someone you trust—a mentor, a teacher, or even your own inner faith. With the 2 of swords reversed, a decision is being made, whether you feel ready for it or not. And then, temperance appears, reminding you to be patient with yourself. Balance is key. You don’t have to have all the answers right now, but you do need to find harmony within.

Now, looking at how you can take better care of yourself, the 3 of pentacles reversed suggests struggles with collaboration or teamwork. You might feel like you're doing everything alone or that the people around you aren’t truly supporting you. The 8 of swords reinforces this feeling—you may feel trapped, like there’s no way out. But this card is a reminder that most of these limitations exist in your mind. What if you’re freer than you think?

The 10 of wands reversed shows a need to release burdens. You’ve been carrying too much for too long, and it’s time to let go. You don’t have to handle everything by yourself. The queen of swords tells me that deep down, you already know what you need to do. She is clear, sharp, and decisive. Your soul is asking you to step into that energy—to set boundaries, to cut through confusion, and to choose yourself.

The 10 of pentacles is a beautiful sign that stability, security, and long-term fulfillment are possible. Even if things feel chaotic right now, your path is leading toward something solid. And with the emperor at the bottom of the deck, I see a reminder that structure and discipline will help you regain control. You are meant to step into your power, to take charge of your life, and to build something lasting.

Right now, your soul needs you to stop carrying what isn’t yours, to trust yourself more, and to find a balance between logic and emotion. You are stronger than you realize, and everything that feels heavy now is preparing you for something much greater. Let go, realign, and step into your power.

-xoxo🫂💖

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

Date Night

Summary: When Tim didn't pick you up for a date night he planned, you knew that you would find him back at his office. Intending to make him beg for your forgiveness you take yourself in your slutty outfit to the station to find out what Tim will do to make up for forgetting about you.

Pairing: Tim Rockford x fem. reader

Wordcount: 2.4k

Rating: E

Warnings: established relationship, smut (oral f receiving; unprotected sex), a whole lot of making out, semi public sex, food, surprise at the end

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Full Masterlist // Pedro Pascal Masterlist

You knew he would have a good reason, he always has. 

The passion he has for his job is one of the reason you love him so much. 

That did not mean that it didn’t hurt when 7 pm turned to 8 and to 9 pm without a single text or call. 

You had been looking forward to today. 

Pretending to work from home while you took an everything shower and shaved every inch of your body. You scrubbed and moisturised your skin with the lotion you knew Tim loved the smell of. 

You put the slutty black mesh body on, needing almost ten minutes to have all the straps in place, rolling the silky stockings up your equally silky thighs, connecting them to the suspenders of the flimsy body you were wearing. 

You looked fucking hot, thighs pressing together at the thought of what Tim would do to you once he finally got you home and naked. 

You reached for the deep green velvet dress you loved, running your fingers over the soft fabric that reached just above your knees before you searched for some heels. 

You didn’t wear them often, but you loved the way your ass looked when you wore them, so you would suffer the couple steps to and from the car.

Tim had made reservations for dinner at the restaurant you had your first date at.

This date night was actually his idea and you, silly little you thought that maybe, maybe he’d pop the big question tonight. 

You had been dating for four years, living together for three. 

Marriage was not something you really discussed, but you both wanted to get married eventually. And with the effort he had put into tonight you got enough signals to actually gotten your nails done yesterday after work. 

But now, at 9:05 pm without Tim having picked you up or having reacted to any message or call you placed on his work and mobile phone you were mad. 

Because you knew, as one of his colleagues who actually picked up his phone told you, that he was in the station. In his office. 

You weren’t someone who made a big deal of when he stayed too long at work. You knew he was a workaholic, though it had gotten a lot better since you moved in. 

But tonight you had the fuck me heels on, and fuck you wanted to spend the night with your hunk of a boyfriend. 

So, after another twenty more minutes of waiting and brooding over feelings like a stupid neglected girlfriend, you got up and grabbed your keys. 

You made sure the red lipstick you had put on was still perfect on your lips before you went to your car to pay a visit to Tim. 

There were only a few cars left in the parking lot as you parked your car next to Tim’s. You made sure your boobs looked good before you exited the car and made your way towards the police station. 

You knew the people who worked here, having spend countless barbecues and birthdays with them, so when you opened the door to walked in you made sure to say Hello to everyone. 

„Damn, you look hot,“ one of Tim’s female colleagues whistled and you grinned. 

„I know,“ you said with a wink, „He in?“ You gestured in the direction of Tim’s office. She nodded. 

„Yeah. He’s been in there since lunch. Got some new evidence in,“ she explained. 

„That might explain why he forgot he was taking me out to dinner tonight,“ you said and she made a face. 

„Idiot,“ she rolled her eyes and you shrugged with pursed lips. 

„Any of the other detectives still in?“

„Nah. They went home. Got the end of the floor all to yourselves,“ she winked and you gave her a bashful smile before you made your way towards his office. 

You could see the light on behind one single door at the end of the floor and you opened it without knocking, finding Tim sitting behind his desk, dress shirt halfway unbuttoned, tied loosened, still wearing his shoulder holsters. 

Various emotions flickered over his face as he looked up to find you standing in his door. 

Surprise, clearly.

Hunger, as his eyes wandered over your form.

Love, always. 

And then there it was, his eyes widening as regret set in. 

He looked away from you for a second, his eyes finding the clock on the wall. 

„Oh fuck,“ he shook his head, looking at you, getting up from behind his desk. 

„I totally forgot the time, I’m so fucking sorry,“ he said, walking towards you but you just crossed your arms in front of your chest which pushed your tits up and you didn’t miss the way his eyes flickered towards your cleavage before he came to stand in front of you, hands on your elbows. 

„We got new evidence in and I forgot the time and I’m a shitty fucking boyfriend,“ he said, his big brown eyes big as he looked at you, hands now on your upper arms. 

„You look beautiful baby,“ his fingers slipped over the soft fabric of your dress. 

„I know,“ you said, now pouting and his lips twitched into a small smile as he stepped forward. 

„Let me make it up to you,“ he said with pleading eyes, before he pulled you against his body, your hand coming to rest on his chest as you looked up at him. 

„And how do you plan on doing that Detective?“ You asked and he hummed, his head tilting to the side as if in deep thought while both of his hands slowly slid down your back before grabbing a handful of your ass.

„I can think of a few ways,“ he hummed before he kissed you. You sighed against his lips, your arms wrapping around him, one of your hands running through his soft hair as he deepened the kiss. He walked you back, caging you against his door and you heard the soft click of him locking his door and you smiled against his lips. 

His hands slowly slipped the soft fabric of your dress up, his fingers leaving goosebumps as they moved over your skin, all while his tongue played with yours. 

He groaned when he felt the lace of your stocking. 

„Fuck baby. Can I see you?“ He mumbled, one of his fingers hooking through the straps of the garter belt you were wearing and you hummed thoughtfully. 

„I don’t know Detective, you think you already earned that?“ You looked at him, challenging him. 

Instead of answering you he slowly sank down on his knees, while now both of his hands held up the fabric of your dress. He groaned a low fuck me when he saw what you were wearing, his face leaning in, nuzzling against your lace covered panties as he inhaled deeply. 

„She already wet for me?“ He asked, his breath warm against your skin. Not giving you a chance to answer his tongue slipped over your flimsy panties and you gasped as he hummed. 

One of his hands grabbed one of your legs, hooking it over one of his shoulders and you let your back fall against the door, one of your hand reaching down, fingers gliding through his hair. 

„I’m sorry,“ he whispered before he pushed your panties to the side. 

„I’m sorry I forgot about our date,“ he kissed you just above your clit. 

„Again,“ he murmured before his fingers parted your folds and he moaned when he saw just how wet you already were.  

„You’re so wet for me baby,“ he licked through your folds and you sighed, head falling against the door with a soft thump.

„I’m sorry I’m such a shitty boyfriend,“ he murmured as his tongue played with you, the way his facial hair scratched over your sensitive skin as he ate you out leaving you shuddering. 

One of his arms was wrapped around your thigh, holding you in place as his other hand held you open for him. 

„I’m close,“ you moaned, fingers gripping his hair and he groaned, his tongue fucking you as deeply as he was able to, humming as he tasted you. 

„Already?“ He teased and you pulled his hair, making him moan. 

He chuckled to himself before his tongue focused all its attention on your clit. Flicking it at first before he sucked it between his lips, knowing exactly what to do to make you cum. 

And within seconds you did, flooding his mouth with your slick as you moaned his name quietly. He continued to lick into you until you pushed him away and he slowly let your leg down before he sat back on his heels, looking very smug as he looked up at you. 

„Am I forgiven yet?“ He asked and you rolled your eyes, playfully slapping his hands away as you walked over to his desk. Your eyes softened when you saw the photo the two of you took on your last vacation on his desk as you leaned with both palms down over his desk, wiggling your ass. 

„I think I need some more grovelling,“ you smirked over your shoulder and Tim got back up on his feet. He pressed into you from behind and you could feel how hard he was. His hands were on your hip as he leaned down, finding your lips in a soft kiss. 

„Can’t do that kind of grovelling on my knees though,“ he grinned and you chuckled. 

„Just fuck me, Tim,“ you pushed against him and he huffed a laugh. You turned your head back forward as you heard his belt buckle, followed from a zipper. 

He pushed your dress up, before he reached for your panties, slowly slipping them down your legs until you could step out of them. You didn’t know he put them into the pocket of the shirt he was wearing, intending to keep them. 

You jumped in surprise when he licked through your folds again, humming in satisfaction. 

„Could taste you all day,“ he said, before he slapped your ass, making you jump again.

„You should do that some time,“ you teased and felt his hands squeeze your hips. 

„Oh I will,“ he said, feeling the tip of his cock slowly enter you. 

„Gonna spend all day with you in bed, fucking you in every way possible,“ he groaned, sinking into you fully. 

„Promises, promises,“ you teased looking over your shoulder just when his hand came down on your ass in a sharp slap. 

„Brat,“ he shook his head in amusement. 

„I thought you were grovelling?“ You asked and he bottomed out before snapping his hips back against your ass, his cock filling you completely, air rushing out of your lungs in a low moan as he began to fuck you. 

One of his hands was massaging one of your ass cheeks as he kept a steady pace. 

„Always so warm and wet for me,“ he hummed, hips snapping against yours. Your lips were parted as you panted, low moans escaping you as you tried to keep quiet. 

„Wanna cum in this little pussy,“ he moaned and you began to meet his thrusts. 

„You gonna let me?“ He hummed and you pushed yourself up, feeling his arm wrap around your middle as he pulled you against his chest, fucking up into you as he held you. 

„Only if you gonna clean me up once we’re home,“ you whispered and he groaned as his lips found yours in a sloppy kiss. His hand slipped down your body, under your dress, finding your clit, playing with it. 

„Cum for me,“ he mumbled against your lips, his cock filling you in the perfect angle and it wasn’t long before you came, squeezing his cock while he fucked your through your orgasm, his lips still on yours before he followed you shortly after, painting your walls with his cum. 

You stayed like that for a moment, him holding you against his chest as you kissed. 

„I am really really fucking sorry I forgot about dinner,“ he whispered against your lips and your eyes softened. 

„It’s okay. I know how important your work is for you,“ you murmured, before you kissed him again. 

He slowly pulled out of you, grabbing some tissues from his desk to clean you up before he tucked his cock back into his pants. You jumped on his desk and he smiled as he came to stand between your legs, one of his hands tilting your face up towards him. 

„You will always be more important baby. It’s why I planned his fucking dinner,“ he sighed, clearly still disappointed in himself. 

You wrapped both of your arms around his back and he stepped closer as you rested your head against his. 

„You can still take me out to dinner. The Taco Truck down our street is still open,“ you smiled and felt his shoulder relax. 

And that’s how you ended up completely overdressed at almost 11pm a the Taco Truck down your street. Soft music was paying on the radio as you ate. 

„You know there was a reason I wanted to take you out tonight,“ he said and you hummed, happily biting into your Taco. You were sitting on a bench, leaning against Tim’s chest as he watched you eat. 

„Yeah?“ You asked, feeling him nod.

He waited until you were finished eating before you felt him move behind you. Sitting yourself up you reached for a napkin to clean your fingers when you saw him set something down on the table next to you. 

A small turquoise box. 

You frowned for a moment before you looked at him with wide eyes. 

„I wanted this night to be perfect, and I can’t believe I let my job get in the way of that again,“ he shook his head before he got up only to get down on one knee in front of you, taking your hand while his other reached for the small box, flipping it open to reveal a beautiful diamond ring. 

„But maybe asking you to marry me in front of a Taco Truck instead of a fancy dinner should have been my plan along.“

[togeppys]

family line ;

riorson!reader x garrick tavis onyx storm spoilers

xaden's younger sister, who has been in a relationship with garrick since before the rebellion, is meeting her mother for the first time in 13 years in hedotis and dealing with all of the chaos on the isle. based off of the song family line by conan gray & only one use of Y/N because I could not find a way to work around it lol wc: 8.5k whoops cross posted on ao3!

Scattered 'cross my family line I'm so good at telling lies That came from my mother's side Told a million to survive

As your dragon makes contact with the sand in Hedotis, you slide down their front leg to finally disembark after the aching 13 hour flight that your squad endured. Your body is tense from the rigid position you were forced to maintain on the ride, so you stretch to get all of the knots out of your body while familiarizing yourself with your surroundings. With a roll of your shoulders, you take in the slightly cooler temperature of this particular isle, and the new greenery that adorns the ground ahead of the group. You turn to look at the sea and the expanse of blue that seems to go on endlessly, relishing in the peace that overtakes you as you watch the waves roll in and crash at the shore.

Raising your arms above your head to stretch out your back, you let out a deep breath as the tension begins to lessen and you finally begin to feel comfortable again. Before you can fully lower your arms back down to your side and move to locate your brother or Garrick amongst the squad, a muscular set of arms wrap themselves around your waist, their owner's head coming to rest on your right shoulder. You don't need to turn to recognize the feeling of Garrick embracing you, and all you can do for a moment is smile, taking in the comfort of the warmth that he presents.

"Beautiful," Garrick comments and you can't help but agree, assuming he's describing the sea that you've been staring at for at least a few minutes now.

"It is, isn't it?" you ask rhetorically, staring down at the horizon where the blue of the sea meets the blue of the morning sky, "There's something inherently peaceful about it all, and it's such a gorgeous shade of blue."

"I wasn't talking about the sea," your boyfriend responds, spinning you around in his arms so that you're now facing him, and you can clearly see the mischievous twinkle in his eyes that somehow always seems to make itself visible when he flirts with you. He leans forward and gives you a quick peck on the lips before standing up straight once again.

Despite the fact that the two of you had been dating since right before the apostasy, you still get butterflies when he does things like this, and you feel your cheeks redden slightly despite your brain telling you that it's irrational to be getting this giddy when a man that you've been dating for six years tells you that you're beautiful.

You jokingly smack him in the center of his very muscular chest, and he lets out a laugh, finally untangling his arms from around your waist. You take his hand in your own, beginning to pull him towards the other riders and fliers who had gathered a little ways away. Your eyes skim over the buildings and merchants nearby as you approach them, finally hearing what they were discussing.

Mira and Drake are busy arguing about the Pelson maneuver, and both of you can't help but smile as no one takes Drake's side. It's when Xaden snaps at him that your smiles quickly drop, and you, Garrick, and Violet look at each other alarmed. Something that trivial ticked Xaden off that easily? Anxiety over how quickly your brother's humanity is deteriorating tightens your chest, and Garrick gives your hand a reassuring squeeze. You only look away from each other when Violet's head snaps towards a group in tunics that approaches your squad. As you all turn to face them, your boyfriend removes his hand from yours and you almost protest, before he instead wraps one arm around your waist protectively, as if he can yank you behind him at a moment's notice.

The man who approached you compliments your dragons, and introduces himself after Xaden questions who he is.

"I'm Faris, the second of the triumvirate," his introduction begins, and you can't help but stare at the colour of his eyes, a shade of blue bordering purple that you'd never seen on anyone before. Many people on the Continent had incredible eyes, but you had never seen any this colour before.

"Welcome to Hedotis," he greets the group, before complimenting Violet on her eyes. It appears to be a trait that everyone is focused on in the moment.

"I was just thinking the same about you," she admits.

"Mine are quite common on our isle," he responds, "I've brought my household to formally make your acquaintance and escort you through our beautiful city. If you're amenable, we have room for you to rest at our home on the northeast shore."

He gestures behind him and looks over at the group he arrived with. "Darling, won't you come say hello? I apologize for my wife. Talia seems to be overcome by your magnificent dragons."

The name sends a shiver down your spine - hearing your mother's name spoken by anyone brings a sour taste to your mouth, regardless of whether or not it's in reference to her specifically. A woman who seems to be the man's wife walks up to approach him, her face hidden from view. Her gown flows behind her, and she laces her fingers in his hand.

When she looks up and you can finally see her face clearly, you're frozen in place, unable to form a coherent thought or will your body to do anything that isn't just stand utterly still and stare at the woman in front of you. Her gaze first catches on your brother who is as frozen as you are, her eyes widening in shock. Her eyes study him for a moment unbelieving, before they flick over to you and you suddenly forget how to breathe as she looks over you in a similar fashion. Your knees go weak beneath you, and if it weren't for Garrick's arm holding you upright, you think that you'd have collapsed into the sand by now. The boy next to you is visibly pale as he mutters, "Oh, shit."

"Xaden? Y/N?" she whispers, raising her hand before dropping it, "Is that really you?"

Upon hearing her speak, you and Xaden seem to exit your trancelike state, your senses finally coming back to you. The moment of shock is gone, and all you can feel is rage. The woman before you is not the woman you spent your childhood looking up to, wishing you could be as graceful and beautiful as her. She's the woman who abandoned you at 8 years old in the middle of the night without so much as a goodbye. She's alive, been here in Hedotis all this time, without so much as a message. You see red, as Xaden curtly greets her with a tense "Mom."

She looks at you expectedly, and you can't find it in yourself to meet her with the same greeting. She lost the ability to be your 'mom' when she left you at a time when you were a child who needed a guiding feminine figure in your life. She lost the title of 'mom' when she didn't come back for you when your father died and you were forced into a foster home and subsequently Basgiath.

"Mother," is all you can get out, because the woman before you is not your mom, she's just the woman who brought you into this cruel world.

— • —

You sit silently with your legs draped over Garrick's lap on a couch in the bedroom that the two of you are sharing. You haven't said a single word since your first encounter with your mother, and you're grateful that your boyfriend doesn't push you to comment on it until you're ready. One of his hands soothingly combs through your hair, grounding you from the ire that pulses through your veins. Your mind hasn't calmed once since that moment, thought after thought plaguing you, your body essentially acting as if being controlled by an external source.

You were only eight when your mother had left, still a child with your kid-like features dominating your appearance. When you were fourteen, you had once heard Garrick and Bodhi's mothers whispering about how you looked exactly like your mother, only sharing a few features with Fen and your brother. Upon seeing her for the first time as an adult, you realized that they had not been exaggerating. There was no doubt that you were her offspring, your features almost identical to hers, which only made the experience more infuriating.

Xaden had informed you that he had no intention of talking with your mother before he retreated into his room with Violet, and you couldn't blame him. She left on his birthday, and he was the one that was forced to take on the responsibilities that never should have been his to bear. You wanted to do the same, shut the woman down if she tried to talk to you, but something in you also wanted answers; to hear the doubts that had circled in your mind for years confirmed, so that you could either find it in you to forgive her and move on, or conclude that she never was the woman you thought she was.

As if hearing your thoughts, a soft knock sounds on your door, and you know it's her - none of the riders or fliers would knock on the door with so much uncertainty. Garrick's hand freezes in your hair and he looks to you for confirmation.

"I'll go open it," he says, soft enough so that his voice can't be heard on the other side of the door, "Do you want to talk to her? I'll tell her to fuck off if the answer is no."

You ponder the options for a moment as a second knock follows. You can't seem to make up your mind, but your brain is leaning more towards hopefully never encountering her again. You shake your head in response, and he nods in understanding, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead as he moves your legs to the side so that he can stand up and walk to the door.

When the door opens you hear a clear "Garrick-" from your mother before the man swiftly steps through the crack in the door and into the hallway, shutting the door behind him so that their voices are now muffled.

"She doesn't want to talk," you can vaguely hear him say in response to a garbled request from the woman, his voice raised enough that you can still hear him despite the wall separating you, "And rightfully so, you abandoned them thirteen years ago and you're expecting for them to what, welcome you back with open arms and cheer for their mommy? A fruit platter isn't going to change you not being there for thirteen years. At this point, you've been gone longer than you were ever there. Besides, if you had been around the whole time you'd know she's too afraid of eating figs ever since Fen had to save her from choking on one."

You can't help but smile at the way that the older boy is defending you through lecturing your own mother. You know this is just as shocking for him - the woman was a frequent figure in his childhood as well before she turned her back on all of Tyrrendor and everyone within it. You're grateful for the protective stance that he's immediately taken, mentally reminding yourself to show him your gratitude when you're no longer in this situation.

"I'm not expecting a jolly reunion, I just want to talk, even if only for a few moments," your mother responds, a strain in her voice as if begging Garrick to convince you to talk to her, "She has the right to be angry, I just… I want to explain."

While you know that you likely can't trust a word she's saying, hearing her say that ignites the spark in you that makes you want to get your answers. Xaden definitely isn't going to talk to her, so maybe you can get answers for you both. You wonder if she had already tried at Xaden's door, and how Violet would have handled this situation. Garrick at least knew the woman before she left so he's able to argue with her, Violet has next to no context to defend Xaden.

"Explain what? That you abandoned your two children in the middle of the night without telling them you were leaving in the first place?" you hear Garrick scoff, "You weren't there to see the two people I care about most in this world fall apart because they lost someone that was supposed to be there for them and love them unconditionally."

Your heart seizes at Garrick's words as he continues angrily berating your mother. You really have to make sure he knows how much you appreciate him standing up for you later. Your heart takes over your head, and you find yourself standing up and making yourself look presentable in the mirror. You're going to go out there and put up with the woman for even just a few moments so you can get your answers.

"I do love them," you can hear Talia protest as you move towards the door, "You don't understand Garrick, you were just a child yourself. Even if it's just at dinner tonight, I need-- I want to talk to at least one of my children."

"Exactly, I was just a child, but your own son was the same age as me, much less your daughter being two years younger, and even I couldn't fathom your rationale for just up and leaving, so just imagine how much they-" Garrick's voice gets louder as you open the door, and his sentence is cut short, his head immediately snapping over to you as you stand in the doorway, eyes blank as you glance between the duo that had been arguing outside your door.

"My girl…" your mother whispers seeing you in the doorway, and you immediately shut her down.

"You lost the right to call me that when you abandoned me and Xaden," you state firmly, eyes boring into the woman before you even as her face falls from hearing your statement, "I wasn't going to talk but you get ten minutes to answer questions I have. That's all you're getting."

Talia frantically nods, agreeing to those terms, "Yes, yes of course, there's a room down the hall where we can sit." She brings your attention to the fruit tray that she has apparently been holding all this time. The hazel eyed boy looks at you with a skeptical glance, as if confirming that this is what you really want. You nod, hand briefly brushing over his bicep as your mother waits for you to follow her.

"Thank you," you whisper to him.

"I'll be right outside in the hall if you need me, okay?" he reassures, and you nod once again, leaning up to give him a quick kiss on the cheek before you move to follow after the woman.

As you walk down the hall, she spares a quick glance back towards Garrick, who hasn't moved an inch as he carefully watches the two of you walk away.

"The two of you really did end up together," the woman says, likely thinking back to when you were a child and you used to proclaim innocently that you would marry Garrick one day, seeing as he was the only boy you frequently played with that wasn't your brother or cousin, "He really loves you to defend you like that."

She doesn't say anything for a few moments as if in thought, before she continues. "Do you love him?"

You furrow your brows, finally looking at the woman in confusion. "Of course I do, why wouldn't I?"

She's silent once again, not answering your question, and you start to worry that this may be indicative of the conversation you're about to have.

"You and Xaden both… you found people who really love you. I'm happy," she finally says, and you once again look over at her confused. What is she playing at? Is this her way of trying to manipulate you into forgiving her in hopes that Xaden will follow in your footsteps?

You shake your head to clear your thoughts, and continue following after her. You're talking to her to get answers on behalf of your eight-year-old self. Nothing more.

— • —

Oh, all that I did to try to undo it All of my pain and all your excuses I was a kid but I wasn't clueless (Someone who loves you wouldn't do this) All of my past, I tried to erase it But now I see, would I even change it? Might share a face and share a last name, but (We are not the same)

"You never told us you were from Hedotis," you state accusingly as you now sit across from Talia in a grand room obviously meant for casual conversation with guests, the fruit tray resting on a small table between the two of you. She had never once explicitly mentioned being from the isle to you or Xaden, though in hindsight it seemed the obvious conclusion. She loved bright colours, and at night she soothed you and your brother with arinmint tea and stories of a purple-eyed race that lived in peace.

You and Xaden had come to the conclusion that she was hiding among the forces in Poromiel, completely unaware of the grand life that she had been living while her two children faced the possibility of death every day. You can't help but let your eyes wander over the grandeur of the room you're currently seated in; windows framed with intricately embroidered curtains, the shine of a clearly maintained floor, everything placed strategically around the room as if to serve a greater purpose. You have to stop yourself from comparing the room to how she maintained Riorson house years ago, in fear of accidentally letting your walls down in front of her.

"You and Xaden are the heirs to Tyrrendor, it was necessary you grew up with the Tyrrish customs, not those of Hedotis," she responds smoothly, as if her response was practised. You wonder if that was the lie she told herself all those years ago to rationalize hiding this information from the two of you.

A moment of silence passes between the two of you, both of you unsure of how to properly continue this conversation. You came into this discussion with the intention of getting answers, but now that the truth is within your reach, you're suddenly not so sure you want it. She stares at you expectantly, waiting for you to ask the question that hangs heavily in the air.

"Why did you leave?" you blurt out, finally finding it in yourself to ask before you become too scared to face the answers you're about to receive.

"I was only wed to your father because of a contract-" she begins, but you quickly cut her off.

"I know about the contract," you dismiss her response, once again immediately identifying this as a part of her rehearsed rationalizations, "I know that you never loved Dad, but you had to have an heir reach ten years old. You only had me two years after Xaden to make sure you wouldn't have to bear another child and stay another ten years if anything happened to him, didn't you?"

She stares at you, eyes wide for a moment, obviously not expecting this to be one of the questions you asked. A few seconds pass before she slowly nods, the first long-unanswered question you had finally being confirmed. You're not sure how to feel- your mother just confirmed that you were essentially just a backup for your brother.

"Is that why it was so easy for you to leave then?" you follow up, voicing the thoughts that swirl up in the back of your head, eyes never leaving her for a moment. You can see how she tenses, this conversation not going in the direction she expected.

"It was never easy for me to leave," she counters, shaking her head, "It was the most difficult thing I've ever done." Sorrow is plastered all over her face, but at this point you can't tell if it's real or just pretend- she'd lied to you throughout your entire childhood, who's to say she wasn't lying in this moment too?

"You didn't have to leave just because your contract was over," you fire back, crossing your arms over your chest, "If you really loved us, you would have stayed and been there for us as a mother would."

"I would have been killed! Either publicly as your father was, or in secret just as Mairi's husband was - I couldn't be a mother to you if I was dead," she tries to argue, but you can't help but roll your eyes.

"You weren't a mother to us either way. Dad wasn't killed until I was 15, there were moments that I- we needed you in the seven years you weren't there," you instantly reply, bitterness seeping from your words "And okay, fine if I play into that narrative, why didn't you come back for us when the rebellion was over? Xaden and I were sent to foster homes while our mother was apparently alive and thriving on the other side of the sea."

The resentment that radiates from you is evident, and the woman before you seems to shrink into herself with each word you speak. She displays regret, but there's no way of telling how sincere those outwardly displayed emotions are.

"I wanted to take you with me when I left," she begins, speaking slower now as if choosing her wording very carefully, "Your father wouldn't let me. I wanted to come back for you when I got word that the rebellion was over too, but General Melgren was watching all of you children too closely. I feared that he would consider it treason if I brought you two here, and would kill all three of us on the spot."

There is some reason to what she is saying - there was no way Melgren would have let the two children of the rebellion's leader flee the Continent and his control, but it doesn’t hurt any less.

"The least you could have done was tell us that you were leaving instead of disappearing in the middle of the night," you state plainly, and notice how she lowers her head as if agreeing with a small nod.

"Yes, leaving on Xaden's birthday was not the best way to go, but you have to understand that you were both very emotionally attached children. You sobbed uncontrollably every time your father had to leave for trips away, I never would have been able to leave if I told you both that I was leaving the Continent." she starts rambling, her excuses falling on deaf ears.

The frustration that had been simmering at a low boil within you has begun coursing through your veins as you hear her explanations, finding it increasingly difficult to stay civil.

"And you didn't stop to think that might have been an indicator that you shouldn't have left?" you snap, earning a flinch from your mother. Before, she had been willing to let you lead this conversation, but now the woman has rebuttals as the conversation approaches the direction that she had been anticipating.

"I felt nothing but love and adoration for both of you, but you were just children. You wouldn't have understood-" she starts, but your frustration has escalated to exasperation over the fact that despite your points, she does not seem capable of seeing the situation from your point of view.

"We understood fully well what abandonment felt like," your voice is laced with even more resentment as you interrupt her last excuse, ready to bring perspective to what life had been like following her departure, "What you didn't understand was how your leaving scarred me and Xaden. I slept by the foot of your bed every night, thinking that you would come back and I'd be there to see you when you returned. Dad noticed after a few nights and let me sleep in his bed until he was sure that I knew he would never willingly abandon me. So yes, I was a child but I had a better understanding of how a loving parent should act because of Dad than you ever will."

Talia looks at you in stunned silence, a tear rolling down her cheek. She reaches for your hand, but you immediately pull it away, unable to share in this emotionally vulnerable moment with her. You can't find it in yourself to pity her as the gravity of her actions seems to finally sink in.

"I- I didn't realize," she manages to whisper, and all you can do is scoff. You're not sure what she expected from you. Did she think you would accept her excuse of wanting to preserve her own life? Your father made sure to compensate extra for the lack of her presence in your life, and nothing she exhibits now comes even close to the love you felt from him when he was alive.

"Of course you didn't," you gesture to the room around you, though monochromatic, it's much more majestic than the life you'd been living before your return to Aretia, "When you have a life like this you don't need to think about your two children running from death on the Continent. What, you got married immediately, had a couple more kids and forgot all about us?"

You meant it as a sarcastic joke, but the pause and brief panic that flashes behind the eyes that are so similar to your own is not lost upon you when she responds, "I never forgot about the two of you."

Your eyes narrow in her direction as you lean forward slightly in your seat. "Did you have more children when you returned here?"

Talia's lips straighten into a thin line as if contemplating whether or not to divulge her next words. Finally, she decides to tell you the truth. "Yes, I have two sons with Faris. Simeon and Gaius."

It's now your turn to be stunned to silence. You have two half-brothers that you didn't know existed. Two more children to replace you and Xaden. You can't help the jealousy that consumes you; the two boys get to have a childhood with the mother that you and Xaden didn't get to fully experience - a childhood that didn't end in abandonment. You were already born to be a replacement for your older brother, and the fact that she had exactly two more children is the icing on the cake. Your next words are spoken coldly, as only fury fuels you now.

"This whole time, I wished you were dead," you start after the prolonged moment of silence that had passed, earning you a bewildered look, "I thought that there was no way the mother I grew up adoring wouldn't come back for us unless it was physically impossible for her to return."

Talia opens her mouth as if to protest, but you continue before she has the chance to speak.

"We might share the same features, but I am nothing like you. You say you love us but someone who loves their children would never make them feel the way you made me and Xaden feel. I will never treat my children the way that you treated us." Standing up angrily, you cast a cursory glance at the fruit tray that rests untouched in front of you. Its contents are all tailored to things you and Xaden liked as children, but don't match your current tastes at all, only further proving that she's too busy clinging to an idealistic past.

"I will be attending dinner but only for the sake of Violet's mission," you begin walking towards the door without so much as a second glance to the woman, "I don't speak on behalf of Xaden, but do not expect anything more of me."

You don't wait to hear her response before throwing the door open and walking out into the hallway. Garrick, who was patiently leaning up against one of the walls waiting for you, immediately straightens up upon seeing you emerge. Immediately noticing the anger plastered over your face, he cups the side of your face, stroking your cheek with his thumb in a soothing manner.

"I don't expect that went particularly well," he comments, trying to lighten the mood.

"No, it definitely did not," you respond, removing his hand, instead lacing your fingers with his, "Thank you for waiting out here for me."

The boy flashes you a sympathetic smile, the dimple just barely popping in his cheek, "Any day, love."

The two of you begin walking back to your assigned room, and you force yourself not to let any tears fall. You wasted too many tears on this woman as a child, and you will not let any more be shed because of her.

"She's somehow more awful of a mother than I remember," you try to joke.

"Really? I was going to nominate her for mother of the year," the boy jokes back as you walk through the doorway back into your shared room, "Though I guess she is the only one left so it's not really a fair competition."

You can't help but laugh, though you do acknowledge the harrowing truth that she is the last parent alive for any of you marked ones. Where there had been a mother-shaped gap in your life, the parents of your friends were more than willing to take turns acting as a second parent whenever you needed one.

When you had entered womanhood, Bodhi's mother was there giving you tips and helping you select any feminine items that you needed. When you got sick while your father was away on a prolonged trip, Imogen's mother brought you soup and made sure that you were well rested. When you first started dating Garrick, his mother was there to give you both a stern talking to about staying safe and making sure that you were both equally embarrassed by the end of her speech.

You didn't need the woman who gave you life to be present in your life when you had a community of people that truly loved you, always ready to stand by your side.

The revelation brings you to double check that the door to your room is closed and locked, before pushing Garrick to sit on the edge of your bed, with you standing between his legs. His eyes widen in shock, before fluttering shut as you go to firmly place a kiss on his lips, his hands reflexively going to rest at your hips. He enthusiastically returns the kiss, before abruptly pulling away. You frown as he looks at you, eyebrows knitted together in concern.

"As much as I like what appears to be developing here, I need to know that you're not just doing this because of whatever just happened with Talia-" he begins, his eyes looking between yours for confirmation that you're in the right state of mind.

You cut him off with another kiss, once again lasting only a few more seconds before you pull away to whisper in his ear.

"I spent so long caring about the mother that wasn't there for me, and I haven't been giving enough appreciation to the boy that has been by my side through it all," you say, and you can feel the sudden increase in his heart rate.

You see the corners of his mouth lift up in a smile, as his hands tighten around your hips.

"I won't argue with that."

— • —

How could you hurt a little kid? I can't forget, I can't forgive you 'Cause now I'm scared that everyone I love will leave me

You and Garrick were the last to arrive for dinner, and much to your dismay, the only two seats left at the table were the two right next to your mother. Garrick gives you a glance and takes the seat next to the woman before you can even open your mouth to comment on the situation. You mutter a quick thanks to him, before taking the seat to his left, next to Aaric. Xaden shoots you a glance as well, a look that he has perfected over the years, silently asking you if you're okay. You nod slightly, and he nods in response, indicating that he's okay as well.

After the conversation you had with Talia, you don't have much of an appetite. At first you only pick at your food, but Garrick leans over to you, whispering in your ear that you should eat so that you have energy to explore the rest of the isle. You can't argue with that, and use a hyper-focus on the plate in front of you as an excuse for avoiding the stare that Talia has divided between you and Xaden.

You only retain bits and pieces of the conversation, cataloguing enough so that you're informed enough for the mission, but not paying full attention in fear of either breaking down or lashing out against the woman to Garrick's right.

You can't help but tighten your grip around your fork as the remainder of your group identifies that this dinner is a test of all of you - a way for them to determine if you're worth their time.

"Talia will serve as witness," Nairi says, "And we thought an informal setting would be best given the… delicate nature of relations."

You can't help the satisfaction that comes from seeing your mother's shoulders slump as she shrinks in on herself at that statement.

"You mean in case my sister and I embarrass our mother in a public setting with our lack of wisdom. Is that your fear, Mom?" Xaden quips back coolly, casting a glance over at you before glaring daggers into the woman. To some degree, she's lucky that you had the conversation with her earlier - you can't imagine how much less civil you would be right now if you hadn't taken out your anger on her earlier in the day. She has two new perfect sons that she can present to the public. You and Xaden are now reduced only to these secluded meetings, her Riorson children not up to the Hedotis standard.

"No." The woman seems to regain her previous composure, realizing how weak she had looked before, "My reticence about tonight is due to my own shame, in that I asked Faris for a personal favour so that you might be more comfortable during the conversation. I don't worry about your intelligence. You were always bright children." She reaches for her goblet, hand shaking, a reminder to you of her cowardice. Despite what she says right now, you know that she's afraid of how her husband and the remainder of the triumvirate will perceive her two children from her past.

You can't help the audible scoff that escapes you, Aaric sparing you a quick look as Faris seems to change the subject, focus shifting to Cat as they discuss gryphons. It's not lost on you that she can only comment on your intelligence before she left, but what value does that measure present? You were eight and Xaden ten, merely children who knew so little of the world. Now you're both adults, riders bearing the burden of a revolution on your back. Your intelligence then is nothing compared to what you know now.

You're brought back to the conversation when you hear Nairi speak up once again. "So many young royals here. So many potential alliances. Why are you not contracted to one another? It seems… foolish not to forge futures and provide heirs who could unite your kingdoms."

Your eyebrows shoot up, and you notice that even Garrick can't hide the shock on his face at that statement.

Aaric defends his reasoning from next to you, so nonchalant that he appears as if this is just regular dinner conversation to him. You can't help but respect the way that he treats all of this with grace despite the subtle insult.

When Nairi turns to Xaden, his gaze also flickering over to you, you find yourself holding your breath. The whole situation with Cat and Violet was messy, and you fear slightly for how this will turn out.

"And your excuse? We received news months ago that your title had been restored to you." Your heart seizes, but you don't let it show. They have more current information than you realized; you should have guessed based on the way that Talia mentioned she knew about the rebellion ending, but it still hurts to hear.

"Well then as you know, I'm a duke, not a prince." Xaden responds even-toned, contrasting his action of stabbing a piece of potato on his plate with a fork. Nairi looks over to you, as if expecting your response as well.

"I'm only the backup for Tyrrendor," you sourly look towards your mother, who avoids eye contact at the accusatory statement, "I don't inherit much as long as Xaden stays alive, so I'm free to marry Garrick with no consequences." You toss a small smile over to the boy next to you, who in return has a smug smile light up his face, his arm going to rest on the back of your chair.

Talia rushes to defend Xaden's position, immediately blabbering on about the size of Tyrrendor and how an alliance was supposed to be secured, trailing off as she glances between Xaden and Violet.

"I don't owe you an explanation about my love life." Xaden states, a complete lack of amusement clear on his face.

"Lost that privilege about thirteen years ago," you mutter in response, but the woman hears it, and a dejected look crosses her face before she pivots to Cat, who is now summarizing the situation between her and Xaden, and the benefits of Xaden and Violet being in a relationship. You roll your eyes as the triumvirate seems to argue their points, proposing a contract marriage between Xaden and Cat.

Your blood begins to boil at the conversation unveiling before you. Do none of these people have an ounce of humanity in them? Is everything only done for the sake of a contract? You look between Talia and Faris, and you begin to see how clearly she fits in here, the woman who was willing to abandon her two young children for the sake of contract, married to this man who has no regard for Xaden and Violet's relationship.

"If bloodlines equaled allegiance, we wouldn't be sitting here under interrogation," Garrick pipes up sarcastically laughing, and you can't help but laugh at the truth of his statement. Talia was your mother, if you went by their logic, Hedotis would already be allied with Tyrrendor. "The two of them are your children right?"

A smile ghosts your lips at your mother's discomfort as she downs the tea in front of her in embarrassment.

"Draw up the papers," Xaden says suddenly, and all of your necks immediately snap towards him in shock. Is he really agreeing to a marriage with Cat?

"Ah, there we go! What an excellent decision. Shall we go with three or four years?" Faris exclaims happily, his hands clapping together. Normally, you would have a sarcastic retort, but you're too surprised by Xaden's response to say anything.

"Lifetime. Anything less is unacceptable," you watch as Xaden's hands meet the back of Violet's neck. "And her full name for the papers is Violet Sorrengail. Two Rs."

You almost choke on your own saliva, and Garrick does let a choked laugh out from beside you. Somehow, Aaric doesn't even react.

"My last name is tied to the title, but we could take yours," Xaden says to Violet.

"You could hyphenate? Or combine? Riorgail? Sorrenson?" Garrick proposes to the whole table, and you have to smack him in the leg so that he stops spurring them on. Xaden continues arguing with your mother who is a pleading and panicked mess from across the table.

Garrick turns to you as the others argue, his voice dropping and his dimple ever so present, "We could do that too when we get married. Thoughts on Riorvis? Tavson?"

You scrunch your face up in disgust, "Both of those sound awful."

He nods, "Yeah now that I hear it out loud I agree. Hyphenate? Riorson-Tavis? Tavis-Riorson."

You think on it for a moment, grateful to be having this lighthearted conversation rather than the heated topics the rest of the table are currently facing. "That's kind of a mouthful. I'm fine with just taking Tavis."

He raises an eyebrow surprised, but the smile doesn't leave his face, "You'd abandon the Riorson name?"

You lay a comforting hand on top of his thigh and a warm smile in response, "For you? Definitely."

He removes his hand from behind your chair, moving it to instead rest on top of yours. Your anger has dissipated, your mood significantly improving upon discussing the prospect of you being married to the love of your life. You're not going to let the rest of this table ruin that.

You focus on your food once again, instead taking your fork in your left hand now that your right is trapped under Garrick's. You try not to let your mother's words rile you up again; her spat with Xaden is almost word for word the same as the conversation she has had with you. It's clear that she has rehearsed her excuses, and you give Xaden the space to let his resentment out now, just as you had done in the guest room.

You don't speak another word until it's time for dessert, when your plate gets whisked away to the kitchen, and you lose your source of distraction. When dessert is placed in front of you, you can't do anything but freeze, eyes staring blankly at the slice of chocolate cake in front of you. You can't even find it in yourself to look up at your brother, for you know he's feeling the same sentiment as you right now. Chocolate cake was always his favourite, but it was equally sentimental to you. Every birthday or special event, chocolate cake was your mother's go-to celebration food. Every special occasion in your childhood was marked with this exact cake, and seeing it in front of you makes your mouth go dry.

Garrick has already begun eating the cake, mumbling to you about how it tastes exactly like the one from your childhood. You can't find it in yourself to take a bite - it feels as if you would be conceding to your mother, letting her win, showing her that she can still find a way into your heart.

You're suddenly snapped to your senses, as you see Violet from off to your left snatching the fork from Aaric's grasp. You look up in confusion, even more bewildered when you hear her yell "Stop!"

You quickly look around the table and notice that Garrick is the only one that's eaten any of the cake. Your heart starts to beat faster when you feel him start to sway.

"He said we could start," he says quizzically, before he blinks slowly, "I feel… I feel-" his eyes flutter and he collapses. By this point, your heart is beating wildly out of your chest as you and Aaric both lunge to stop him from completely dropping onto the table.

Holding him in your arms, you go to check his pulse, and you feel pure fear run through your entire body when Aaric, who is helping support the large man exclaims, "He's not breathing!"

Xaden runs over immediately, taking Garrick from your arms and laying him on the floor. You crouch next to him, refusing to leave his side, tears starting to blur your vision. You'd hoped in this kind of situation that you'd be able to remain calm, but seeing the man you love in such a vulnerable state, moments away from death, you lose all ability to think logically.

Your brother is checking his pulse once again, confirming that his heart is still barely beating.

"We need to get him to breathe, he's fucking blue." Aaric comments.

Xaden agrees, before leaning over and breathing into Garrick's mouth. The room feels as if it's spinning while you watch Garrick's chest rise as it's filled with the air from the other boy's breaths. You feel utterly useless as you sit there, watching your brother attempt to save your boyfriend's life.

"You poisoned my children?" you hear your mother shriek from across the room, your gaze snapping up as you hear her angrily berate her husband. You slowly start to put the pieces together. Faris poisoned the cake as part of the test, and Garrick was the only one who fell victim to it. This wasn't her doing, but if it weren't for her husband, you wouldn't be in this situation. You've already let her take enough from you, you won't let her take Garrick too.

"Let me," you say to Xaden, pushing him away from Garrick as he comes up for a breath. He starts to protest, but you cut him off, desperation in your voice, "Please Xaden, help Violet find a cure, I'll keep him breathing."

The boy hesitates before nodding, and he lets you take his place. Your lips meet your boyfriend's, significantly colder than they were only hours before. Tears stream down your face as you find a rhythm, breathing air into his lungs while Aaric sits near you in support. You don't hear a single word being spoken in the room, your frantic heartbeat the only sound in your ears as you work to keep the hazel eyed boy alive beneath you.

It feels like an eternity later when you feel Xaden's hand on your shoulder, urging you off of him so that you can take a break and he can take over for a bit. You look over to see Trager placing his hands on Garrick's chest to keep his heart beating. When did he get here?

You sluggishly look around the room to see that the rest of your group has arrived, and two members of the triumvirate are retching on the opposite side of the room. Tears are still frantically streaming down your cheeks as you stare down at your boyfriend's lifeless body, only being kept alive by the two men preventing him from drifting off to Malek.

"Don't leave me, please Garrick," you mumble, taking his hand into your own, "I can't lose you too, please stay alive." You don't look up when Cat and Maren come join you, the first girl soothingly rubbing a hand down your back, the latter mumbling encouraging words in your ear. You're too consumed with fear to be surprised that Cat is comforting you, though it does make sense to some degree. She controls emotions, it's only reasonable that she's here to comfort you through this. Or girl code or something. Who knows.

"He's going to be okay. Dain's preparing the cure now," Maren whispers into your ear, and you finally look up at the girl, pity in her eyes as she takes in your fragile state.

"They found it?" you whisper, and she nods. Cat's hand is removed from your back as Violet calls her off to do something, but Maren stays at your side.

"It was figs. He's just preparing it so Garrick can consume it. He's going to be fine." she smiles softly, and you finally stop trembling for long enough to her to take some comfort in your current state and go off to help Cat with her orders.

You don't move an inch until Dain comes back with the fig-drink and he and Xaden make quick work of trying to shove it down Garrick's throat. You lean forward, holding your breath once again, waiting to see if it works and if you'll have the man you love back to you.

He suddenly sputters, some of the drink coming out of his mouth, but Xaden is there in a moment telling him to get up and drink it. You feel as if your body is weightless, sagging in relief as your boyfriend takes four chugs to get the remainder of the drink down. He's alive and you're not going to lose him today.

You and Xaden both look at each other, relieved that he was able to at least be conscious for long enough to take in the drink. You take as few breaths as humanly possible in the next three minutes as you and your brother sit hand in hand next to his body waiting for him to wake up.

When Garrick groans and opens his eyes, muttering "This is my least favourite isle," you cry out, burying your face into his chest. Xaden's head falls back as if in a prayer of thanks that his best friend is alive.

Garrick lightly places a hand on the back of your head, as Xaden jumps up and goes to shove Faris against the wall. Deservedly so. You can't find it in yourself to be angry at your mother right now, you can only feel relief and the tears start once again as you remove yourself from Garrick's grasp.

You quickly move to place a kiss on his lips, more desperate than any shared between the two of you before. He weakly kisses you back for a few moments, before you finally come up for air. Your foreheads rest against each other, and he wipes away the tears that are falling down your cheeks.

"I thought I lost you Gare," you cry, trembling in his embrace.

"It's going to take more than a piece of chocolate cake for you to lose me, love." he jokes, and you can't help but laugh as you hold him, tighter than you ever have before, "Ironic the figs that almost choked you to death years ago are the thing that saved me today."

"I love you," is all you can say, despite the chaos reining around you. Fights are being broken out, threats being uttered, but all you care about is the boy in your arms right now that you hope to never lose again.

"I love you too," He kisses your temple with all the strength he can muster, before groaning as he tries to properly sit up, "Can we get the hell off this isle as soon as possible? Your mother's new family is a little psycho."

You smile, nodding as you support him.

"I think I agree, let's never come back."

[piastrisun]

almost home.

pairings: oscar piastri + female character.

summary: for oscar, it’s racing; for grace, it’s home. but maybe, for once, they’re ready to take the same road.

genre: fluff.⠀word count: 3.2k.⠀ warning: none.

notes: i loved writing time jumps, one of my favourites to date. named female character. first oscar win this season!!!! had to post this one that’s been on my drafts for a couple of weeks. couldn’t be happier tbh.

─────⠀ melbourne, 2007.

grace remembers everything about the first time she met oscar. she had just turned six, in her first year of primary school, bouncing with that endless childhood energy as she introduced yourself, with full name and everything, although she knew that no one would ever call her that, especially him, who quickly started to call her ‘gracie’, without even noticing. she hardly noticed his reserved nature as she launched into one of her usual monologues about her latest fascination—words and images tumbling out in a way that felt like nonsense to him. but he stayed, listening, his quiet smile an anchor that she’d come to rely on without realising it. when you're so young, it's easier to be lucky enough to make a friend in the simplest way possible, but it's rare to find your soulmate before you're ten, and having them in the form of your best friend is a very different and precious thing.

grace climbed into the car, her backpack slipping off one shoulder as she turned to wave one last time. “mum!” she exclaimed, her voice full of excitement. “i made a new best friend today!”

her mum glanced at her through the rear-view mirror, smiling. “oh? what’s their name?”

“oscar! he’s really quiet, but he doesn’t mind when i talk a lot. and guess what? he called me gracie! no one calls me that.”

from where he stood at the school gate, oscar gave a small wave. grace grinned, leaning out the car window. “bye, oscar! see you tomorrow!” she called.

oscar hesitated, then raised his voice just enough for her to hear. “bye, gracie.”

her mum chuckled as they drove off. “you seem pretty sure about this friendship.”

“i am,” grace said confidently, clutching her backpack. “he’s gonna be my best friend forever. i can tell.”

─────⠀ melbourne, 2013.

at twelve, their friendship had solidified into something unshakable. grace and oscar were a fixture in each other’s lives—a quiet certainty in the chaos of growing up. they still spent most weekends together, whether at grace’s house, oscar’s, or somewhere in between. even at school, they gravitated towards each other, though they’d never admit to their classmates just how much time they really spent together.

that saturday, they’d wandered to the park, the familiar playground now a little too small for them, but they stayed anyway.

grace sat cross-legged on top of the monkey bars, her face tilted towards the cloudy sky. “you think we’ll still hang out when we’re old?”

oscar stood on the ground below, leaning against one of the bars, his hands in his hoodie pockets. “define ‘old.’”

“like… twenty,” she said dramatically. “ancient.”

he smirked, glancing up at her. “that’s not old.”

“it is! and you didn’t answer my question,” she said, squinting down at him.

he looked away, his shoulders lifting in a small shrug. “yeah. i reckon we will.”

“you reckon?” she leaned forward, nearly slipping. “what kind of answer is that? you’re supposed to say, ‘of course, gracie, you’re the best mate i’ll ever have!’”

oscar’s ears turned red, but his voice stayed quiet. “you are my best friend. i just didn’t think i had to say it out loud.”

she grinned, her playful tone softening. “good. ‘cause you’re stuck with me, oscar. forever.”

─────⠀ melbourne, 2015.

at fourteen, they were inseparable. years had passed, and oscar became her constant presence. they saw each other everyday sometimes only briefly as they passed each other between classes, but on weekends, they’d find an excuse to meet up, if neither of them had plans with family or friends they didn't had in common. that was until oscar left, his ambition pulling him to england in pursuit of a racing career. a day before he left, they sat on her porch, the silence stretched between them as heavy as the goodbye itself.

he glanced down, shuffling his feet as if the gravel could somehow ground the mess of emotions swirling inside him. “i'll text you every day,” he said, his voice wavering almost enough to betray him.

grace's smile didn’t reach her eyes, but she tried to keep it steady, the kind of smile that begged him to believe it was easy for her to say goodbye. "you better. or else i’ll think you’ve become too famous to remember someone like me.”

he let out a laugh, but it came out shaky, filled with a bittersweet edge. "never," he said, looking up at her with a softness that hurt to hold back. "gracie... you know that could never happen, right?"

she nodded slowly, her own voice almost a whisper. "i know." but she wondered if he'd ever truly understand how much she wanted him to stay.

─────⠀ east england & melbourne, 2017.

oscar had been in england for two years. grace was proud of him, of course, but when he returned for a brief holiday at sixteen, something felt different. she tried to fill him in on her life, the normalcy of it all—a sense of routine that felt both grounding and dull, especially compared to his new adventures. and as he listened, she felt a strange ache; their lives were diverging. both of them were experiencing the first sparks of teenage romance (or at least that was what they both believed, mistakenly) in different places. grace updated him on her latest crush, laughing as she told him about the awkward date that had ended in spilled soda and nervous laughter.

as she nudged him with her shoulder, her smile softened, and she felt a warmth that was almost unfamiliar. “you’re not missing much by not being here,” she teased, hoping her tone sounded as carefree as she wanted it to.

he raised an eyebrow, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “i don’t know… sounds like my kind of excitement,” he replied, letting his gaze linger on her.

she laughed, but as she did, she caught herself staring at him a moment too long, noticing the way his world now seemed broader, more vibrant than it had been. there was a sudden tug in her chest, something bittersweet, as if he’d become part of something she couldn’t quite reach, his life seemed to be unfolding in a world that felt lightyears away from hers. and it stung a little, more than she wanted to admit.

“do you ever feel like…” she hesitated, gathering the courage to ask, “we’re different now?” her not quite meeting his eyes.

oscar’s smile softened, fading just enough to reveal something unspoken beneath. “maybe. but not when i’m here. not with you,” he murmured, his voice steady. his eyes held a quiet promise, as if to assure her that no matter how different their worlds became, she would always be part of his.

─────⠀ melbourne, 2019.

at eighteen, their lives were becoming increasingly different now. oscar was back for the summer, but by now, grace was in college, her days crowded with plans and responsibilities, busy with lectures and internships. they managed to see each other only three times in four weeks, each meeting feeling like both a gift and a reminder of slipping back into the comfort of their friendship, but with an underlying tension.

“three times in four weeks, oscar. that’s a record,” she joked, though her tone held a touch of sadness, her eyes dropping to the floor before lifting to meet his.

oscar chuckled, but there was a hint of softness in his eyes. “maybe next time i’ll come back for good.”

she swallowed, masking her racing heart with a casual shrug. “yeah, right. you’d go mad staying in one place,” she teased, but her voice was barely steady.

he took a step closer, his gaze unwavering. “maybe... but i’d stay if you asked.”

grace felt a lump form in her throat, and she forced out a laugh. “don’t say things you don’t mean, oscar.” she said, looking away.

he didn’t argue, but something lingered in his gaze that she tried not to think about. but she couldn’t ignore the weight of his words, making her wonder if, just maybe, he was serious.

─────⠀ east england & tokyo, 2021.

by twenty, their calls and texts grew fewer, though they always checked in during big moments, but that was all they had. at summer, they were in different places entirely, in separate parts of the world, the distance was beginning to weigh on them both.

one night, as they facetimed, oscar sat at his desk, the soft glow of his laptop illuminating his face in the dim room. he leaned back in his chair, fingers idly tracing the edge of his glass. outside, the skyline was dark, flecked with scattered city lights against the night. he glanced back at the screen, where grace’s familiar face was framed by her bedroom's warm, golden light.

“so you think it’s weird that we still talk like this?” she asked, her voice soft, vulnerable.

oscar’s lips curved into a gentle smile. “it’s not weird. it’s… the best part of my day.” he felt the words settle between them, heavier than he’d anticipated, a weight that made his heart beat a little faster.

she felt a warmth spread across her cheeks, her thumb unconsciously brushing against her chin as she held the phone. a flicker of doubt crossed her mind—maybe he was just being nice, or maybe she was reading too much into it. “you’re not just saying that?”

oscar’s expression softened, his eyes never leaving hers. “i wouldn’t lie to you, gracie.” he paused, his gaze intent, almost as if he was waiting for her to understand what he meant, to see the feelings he kept tucked just behind the easy smiles and late-night calls.

she wanted to say something, to acknowledge the quiet hope that seemed to bloom between them, but her mind drew a blank. instead, she nodded, her lips curving in a small, knowing smile. her mind was a whirl of memories—the shared laughs, the countless facetime calls, the way he had become a part of her life so effortlessly. but the weight of her own feelings felt overwhelming, like something she hadn’t quite been ready to admit, even to herself.

clearing her throat, she forced a playful tone. “so… how’s england this summer?” she gestured at the screen, her fingers brushing a loose strand of hair back behind her ear. “as rainy as ever?”

he glanced out his window at the drizzle tapping against the glass, then back to her, his eyes softer now. "yeah, a little. but it reminds me of when you came, complaining about the rain every other day."

she laughed, rolling her eyes. “it’s because it’s miserable, and you know i’m right. london could use a bit more sun.”

his laughter melted into a quiet smile as he shook his head. “you were, but… you made it bearable.” he tilted his head, a playful gleam in his eye. “or maybe it’s just missing you.”

grace’s heart skipped, her grip on the phone tightening slightly as she felt the truth of what he’d said sink in. she wanted to brush it off, to make a joke, but her voice came out softer, more hesitant. "maybe... i miss london too. or parts of it, at least."

oscar swallowed, his gaze steady, but a hint of something vulnerable flickered in his eyes.

“gracie, if you ever wanted to come back, you know you’d have a place here.” his voice was low, carrying a sincerity that made her feel as though he was offering more than just a couch to crash on.

she bit her lip, fingers absently tracing circles on her sweater, letting his words settle in. "i’d like that," she murmured, almost to herself, her eyes meeting his through the screen. she saw him shift, his face lighting up just slightly, as if he’d been hoping she’d say those words all along.

─────⠀ florence, 2023.

now, at twenty-two, he’d invited her to holiday in italy with his family, to celebrate that he was living his dream, finally able to share real time together instead of words on a screen. the days flew by, filled with inside jokes, long conversations, and what both of them seemed to not be ready to acknowledge. there were nights where they stayed up until dawn, laughter echoing through the streets, and moments where silence spoke volumes.

grace felt the familiar bittersweet weight of another goodbye pressing down on her chest. he’s heading back to england; she’s returning to australia. the reality of it lingers in the spaces between, the weight of another goodbye.

but now, standing together at the airport, oscar felt the familiar ache of leaving her again settle in his chest. she was standing there in her jeans and that oversized sweater she always traveled in, her hair slightly messy from the rush to get to the airport. for a moment, all he could think was how beautiful she looked—not in the way you think someone looks in passing, but in a way that made something in his chest tighten painfully, like it had for years.

he shifted his backpack on his shoulder, trying to focus on anything other than the look in her eyes. “so, this is goodbye again, i guess,” he said, his voice quieter than he intended.

her voice was soft, hesitant in a way that was unlike her. “i don’t want it to be. we see each other less and less as time passes.”

he swallowed, glancing down at the scuffed tile beneath their feet. that ache in his chest grew sharper, cutting into him in a way he couldn’t quite explain. it was something he felt every time he left her, something he didn’t have the courage to name.

“i know,” he murmured, lifting his gaze back to hers. “having a friend on the other side of the world… it’s hard.”

but as he said the words, the weight of them settled in his chest. “friend.” that wasn’t what she was to him—not for years now. he couldn’t remember the exact moment it changed, but somewhere along the way, grace had stopped being just his best friend and had become… everything.

his gaze holds hers, a quiet intensity in his eyes. she nods, heart pounding a little faster. “you’ve always been more than a friend to me,” she admits, with the feel of grabbing her heart in her hands.

oscar froze, the words hitting him like a gust of wind. for a second, he couldn’t speak, his mind racing to process what she’d just said. she was standing there, looking at him with those wide, honest eyes, and he felt as though the ground beneath him had shifted.

“i didn’t know you felt that way,” he managed to say, his voice barely audible. his calm demeanour faltered, and he rubbed the back of his neck—a nervous habit he thought he’d outgrown. his brows knit together in a way she hadn’t seen before—an openness, a vulnerability slipping through the cracks of his normally composed face. for once, it was as if she was seeing past the careful restraint he’d always kept around his heart.

she tried to smile, though her throat tightened. “i didn’t know either. not until you kept leaving, and it felt… wrong, like you were taking a part of me with you every time.”

her words made something inside him crack, the careful walls he’d built to keep his feelings in check. he’d spent years convincing himself that what he felt for her wasn’t something he could act on. she deserved someone who didn’t live halfway across the world, someone who didn’t spend half his life chasing dreams on a racetrack. but now, hearing her say those words, all of those excuses felt flimsy and hollow.

he reached for her hand, his fingers brushing hers in a tentative, almost shy motion. when their hands finally met, he felt the steady thrum of her pulse against his own, grounding him in a way nothing else ever had.

there’s a pause, and something shifts in his expression—surprise, maybe even a hint of regret. “why are you telling me this now?” he asks, voice low, almost aching. “just when i’m leaving?”

she takes a steadying breath, feeling the words pour out despite the hesitation in her chest. “maybe because if i told you, you’d have a reason to come back home.”

there she was, the girl he’d grown up with, the one who’d been his anchor through everything. and she was looking at him with a kind of openness he wasn’t sure he deserved, but he couldn’t deny how much he wanted it—how much he wanted her.

he stepped closer, his grip on her hand tightening as he made a decision in that moment, a decision he’d spent years avoiding. “and if i come back for you?” he asked, his voice steady now, resolve bleeding into every word.

“then don’t let this be goodbye,” she whispered.

the air between them shifted, heavy with everything they hadn’t said before. for the first time, oscar let himself feel the full weight of what she meant to him—the years of laughter, arguments, shared secrets, and quiet moments that had shaped him. she wasn’t just his best friend; she was the person who made him feel like he could be more than the sum of his ambitions.

he nodded, his jaw set with the weight of a promise. “i won’t. not this time.”

the grip on her hand was firm now, as if he were afraid to let go, afraid that she’d slip through his fingers again. for his whole life, he had been the calm one, the one who kept his feet on the ground while she dreamed with abandon. but here he was, saying the words she’d longed to hear, and his usually controlled voice held an edge, a tremor that hinted at just how much he meant it.

“the moment you graduate,” he said, voice low and steady, yet laced with a quiet urgency, “i’m taking you to england with me.”

she stared at him, breath caught in her throat as the weight of his words settled. he wasn’t just making a promise—he was laying out a future, one he wanted her to be a part of. the thought of leaving behind everything she’d known, crossing oceans to build something new with him, sent a rush of excitement through her. but there was also a hint of fear, the uncertainty of stepping into a life so different from her own.

his hand moved to her cheek, his thumb brushing her skin in a tender, grounding motion. he felt the hesitation in her breath, saw the uncertainty flicker in her eyes, and he leaned closer, his voice soft but certain. “you’ve been a part of my life since we were kids. i don’t want to keep leaving you behind.”

she let out a shaky breath, her fingers curling around his. “oscar, that sounds… it sounds like everything. but are you sure? your life, your career—everything’s already there. i don’t want to be just some… addition.”

he shook his head, a rare intensity sparking in his eyes. “you’re not ‘just’ anything to me. you never have been.” his words hung heavy, filling the small space between them with a certainty that felt grounding, like a promise he’d spent years building silently within himself. “you’re everything.”

for a long moment, grace stood there, surrounded by the noise and rush of travellers coming and going. but it felt as if the rest of the world had faded away, leaving only the two of them and the quiet realisation of what they’d been holding back for so many years.

she leaned into his touch, smiling softly. “then the moment i’m done,” she whispered, “i’m yours.”

©⠀piastrisun original work. please don’t translate, claim or repost any of my writing, 25’.

[userluhna]

MEET AGAIN

hwang junho x f!reader

next part!

warnings: none! just cute childhood friends

words: something like 1.8k?

a/n: hi! i’m completely new on tumblr and this is my first fic. if you guys like it i will keep posting! please be kind, english isn’t my first language i’m trying my best :) feel free to ask any questions or to help me improve my work (or my account since i don’t know anything!) this fic isn’t focus on the squid game itself if i’m being honest but it still exists in this timeline (?man idk if it’s proper english here.) anyway, enjoy :)

—

it was late. so late.

you could barely stand. your feet ached, your body exhausted after a long shift.

you glanced up at the clock: 7:23pm

you wanted to go home so badly. to curl up with your little cat, wrapped in the coziness of your apartment. but there were still 30 minutes left before you could leave.

the small coffee shop was almost empty, just two students who had been there since 11 in the morning, working on their laptops. they occasionally came up to you with polite smiles, ordering new drinks.

you were almost done for the night, cleaning the last cup on the counter and wiping down the coffee machine. you loved working here—it was a cozy little shop, filled with bright light in the afternoon and soft golden hues in the evening. but because it had been raining all day, it felt like one of those long, winter days. you were so tired, having been up since 7 am, with only a short break to eat before coming back to work.

fortunately, it wasn’t always like this. but since it was spring break, most of the students who usually worked with you had gone back home, far from the big city.

the soft chime of the bell above the front door pulled you from your thoughts.

a tall figure stepped inside.

you didn’t want to turn around. if you did, you’d have to get everything dirty again and put things back in place.

but you did.

“good evening! what can i get you?” you asked, turning away from the sink where you were washing your hands.

and then you saw him.

almost unrecognisable.

maybe because he was taller, stronger. maybe because his features were sharper, his hair darker. maybe because it had been years.

too long.

“hi,” he said, his voice deeper than you remembered. “i’d like an espresso, please. no sugar.”

he didn’t look at you. he was focused on his wallet, searching for some cash. but you stood there, speechless. tilting your head slightly, waiting for him to catch your gaze. to recognize you.

you hoped he would.

that he hadn’t forgotten you.

“there you go.” he finally looked up, handing you the money with a polite smile.

you blinked, still unable to say anything. maybe he had forgotten. it had been nine years, after all.

still, you hoped.

you took the money and handed him his change, turning around to make his coffee in silence. you hadn’t expected to run into him. not today. not ever.

you knew that coming back to the place where you grew up meant running into people from your past. but him?

you slid the small cup of hot espresso toward him. considering the time, you assumed he wouldn’t stay.

you smiled.

“there you go.”

he was already looking at you.

“have a great evening,” you said softly, hesitant.

you didn’t say anything more. maybe he didn’t want to talk. maybe he didn’t even remember you.

“thank you, you too,” he said, turning toward the door.

you looked around—the students had left. it was just the two of you now. for a few seconds.

maybe for the last time.

he stopped. halfway to the door. then, slowly, he turned back to you.

“god, you aren’t going to say anything, are you?” he let out a soft laugh, shaking his head.

you were still standing behind the counter, mouth slightly open, frozen.

he walked back toward you, smiling. you let out a short sigh, a small smile forming on your lips.

“i thought you had forgotten me.”

“you?” he scoffed, placing a hand over his chest in mock offense. “how could i?”

you giggled, resting your hands on the counter and leaning slightly forward.

“hwang junho,” you said softly. “how are you?”

your voice sounded amused, teasing. all the exhaustion from earlier seemed to fade, replaced with excitement.

“i’m good. and you?” he glanced around the empty shop. “do you have a minute now? we could talk.”

you followed his gaze.

“yeah, of course.” you glanced at the clock. “do you want to stay here or… i don’t know, walk?”

your question felt stupid the moment you asked it. the rain was still pouring outside, the sound of it tapping against the windows.

“we can walk,” he said, grabbing his umbrella from the entrance. “we can share it. i don’t mind.”

you nodded, taking off your apron and slipping into your jacket. the shop was already clean and locked up, so you could leave. you turned off the lights and closed the door behind you.

the two of you walked in silence for a while, sharing his umbrella.

“so,” he said, breaking the comfortable silence, “how have you been? when did you come back?”

you could tell he was holding something back. maybe some frustration. or a question he wasn’t sure he wanted to ask.

you looked at him, however he wasn’t, he kept his gaze forward, lips pressed into a thin line.

“great! i came back three years ago,” you said. he nodded, saying nothing.

but you knew why. you could sense it—the frustration, the quiet pain.

“i’m sorry,” you blurted out.

he stopped walking. so did you. his gaze finally met yours, eyes dark and tired, full of unspoken questions.

“i should have come to see you. i mean, i wanted to, i really did, but-“ you hesitated, “i didn’t know how. or what you would—”

his hand found your shoulder, stopping you mid-sentence. you knew there wasn’t a good excuse. and he knew it too.

“it’s okay,” he said firmly. but there was no anger in his voice. “i mean i understand, i didn’t come to see you so-“

“but you didn’t know i came back.” you interrupted him.

his head tilted slightly, a small, knowing smile forming on his lips.

he knew.

you pressed your lips together, sighing as you looked away.

“i’m doing okay,” you said, “i love working at the coffee shop, even though it takes a lot of energy. i have an apartment not too far from here. i live alone.”

you said without thinking

“i mean, it’s not an invitation or anything. like, you can come if you want, since it’s raining, but—”

he laughed. you missed his laugh.

“okay,” he said, amused. “it’s fine. we’re grown-ups.”

“yeah, we are.”

so you walked together, sharing stories from the years you spent apart.

when you arrived, you stepped inside first, taking off your shoes. junho did the same, glancing around your apartment.

“it’s cute,” he said, as he made his way in. “it looks like you. you decorated it well.”

you smiled. it was strange, letting him back into your space. letting him back into your life.

“i really did want to see you when i came back,” you admitted, taking two glasses from the cabinet. “but we barely talked for two years before that. i thought you’d moved on. that you didn’t care anymore. but i did go to your house once but no one was there? it was strange.”

“oh, yeah,” he leaned against the doorframe. “we moved out a few years ago. after inho left.”

“when he moved out?”

“y/n,” he looked at you deeply.

you didn’t know. of course you didn’t. “he disappeared.”

you froze.

“what?” your voice wavered. “is he okay? are you?”

you knew how close they were, how much they meant to each other, how much they cared. you saw all of that. you all cared for each other. you spent hours with them.

so he told you. about inho’s wife. the unborn child. the sickness. the blame. and then, nothing.

he didn’t tell you about the games, about what he saw on the island. he didn’t tell you how tired he was searching for this place. he didn’t tell you about the coma, about the trauma. he didn’t tell you what inho had become.

the questions lingered in the silence, but you didn’t ask. maybe you weren’t ready to know. something had changed in junho. he was different.

and maybe you, too, were different.

but for tonight, it didn’t matter. for tonight, you let the questions sit.

hours passed as the two of you sat on your sofa, talking. he let you ask anything you wanted, so you did. you told him about the six years you spent studying and travelling in england—how your english improved, the people you met, how your sister found love and settled in scotland. in the end, you decided to return to korea, missing the place where you grew up, the comfort of familiar streets and faces.

he told you about graduating as a police officer, how he was good at it, even though the search for his brother left him exhausted.

it was comforting. for both of you.

but it was getting late, and you could feel it in your body. so could junho.

he stood, and you followed. “can we see each other again?” you asked.

“i thought you wouldn’t ask.”

“oh, come on. i know you’re going to miss me.”

“yeah, sure. you’re going to miss me,” he teased.

he walked to the front door, putting his shoes back on. you stood there, close to him.

“do you still have my number?”

“of course, junho,” you said softly.

something about the way you said his name made him pause. maybe even shiver. he looked away, afraid you might notice.

“great.” his hands reached for your shoulders, hesitating only for a second before wrapping around you.

within a moment, you were in his arms, your head resting against his chest. your arms found his waist, holding him close.

“thank you,” he murmured, his head resting on top of yours. you didn’t say anything. you just smiled, sinking into the warmth of his embrace.

he pulled away, offering you one last smile before stepping outside. you waved at him with a soft smile.

when the door finally closed behind you, you let out a slow, deep breath.

tonight felt good.

[caldera1000-7]

Upcoming looong post about analyzing Akutagawa's character song (even though it was made around over 7 years ago I will incorporate things into the arcs after then by a bit but not entirely since his mindset back then was different too but its interesting either way.) Here I will just send a few images that seem to fit with the song.

Somehow Kensho Ono (Akutagawa's Japanese Voice Actor) managed to make the song sound dark, but also strangely...peaceful? But also throughout the song somehow powerful aswell, I think it fits Akutagawa's willpower and how he finds something to drive him forward no matter what, despite his illness, despite his "weakness", he always will push through for a goal, to give meaning to his life, or even to die in peace knowing he's received the words he worked and suffered years just to hear from someone who betrayed/escaped the very organisation he brought Akutagawa to, while possibly seeing himself back then in the PM in Akutagawa and still leaving him there without a word and without even fulfilling the promise of helping him to have a meaningful life or even giving him the words he hoped to hear. Now it makes sense and all later on or after that how Dazai keeps him at an arms length while Dazai is at the ADA and using both Akutagawa and Atsushi in his plans and to make them develop off of each other and some people had the view Akutagawa would just kill himself after Dazai gave him recognition saying its the reason Akutagawa lives but I don't think so.... More like if he were to die he'd die in peace, and probably latch onto something else to work toward as he tries to understand life and the people in it. In the song he mentions a longing as strong as a reason to live it doesn't show or say that Dazais recognition/praise IS his reason to live but its a desire so strong of his that has just been fueled with Dazai calling Atsushi better than him that it might aswell be.

People tend to forget Akutagawa quite hated (Probably still does or dislikes him for things) and wanted to first kill everyone close to him for being a traitor then kill Dazai with physical force if you remember what was all said in this scene thats often overlooked for Akutagawa snapping at Dazai calling his new boy better than him and causing Akutagawa to actually fixate on Atsushi or being better than him and getting strong enough to get what Atsushi gets from Dazai with minimal effort which Akutagawa spend his whole life working for.

And how Akutagawa even after Dazai once said he's gotten "stronger" still couldn't "move forward" until he kills Atsushi. This weak boy who was seemingly just granted everything, a different outcome of the same harmed boy in a way. And a flipped mirror image of Akutagawa. Which is why Akutagawa understanding Atsushi and others really would shape his view on the world, and theres a post I look forward to making in the future talking about how Akutagawas views on Atsushi would also impact his own views on himself. If he still considered himself weak and after learning to value the life of the weak he learned have no place in the world or right to breathe (he was threatened to be sent back to the slums whenever he didn't do things the way they were supposed to be done.)

I'll never get over Atsushi's assumptions as well as many other characters' assumptions of him... But it is true he kills whomever is in front of him if they're in his way. I guess its part of him discovering true strength isn't through his ability but has to be through his heart aswell.

Anyways those are a few images and some things I felt like saying before finishing and posting the very long Analysis. I have many ideas and things to talk about with Akutagawa even after that....

[bcacstuff]

Hi, have you heard anything or have any news on Cait’s London premiere of The Amateur on the 31st?

I haven heard and posted about the London premiere on 31 March at the Odeon in London. I haven't heard anything new about that.

I just saw a new article with a new still as well. It's article from Mujerhoy in Spanish.

Using Google translate:

LIVE

Caitríona Balfe begins her new journey.

By Aloña Fdez. Larrechi 22 Mar 2025

Entering the name Caitríona Balfe (Dublin, 1979) into any internet search engine means entering a universe of biographies that begin with her career as a model, fans who admire her for her work on Outlander, and information about the popular series, which will air its final season this year. Among the results, you can also find a video recorded in 2002, shortly before she participated in the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, in which she is asked about her acting studies and whether she will resume her acting career. "I don't know, I don't have any plans, maybe," answers a young woman in her early twenties with a smile and uncertainty. Four years later, aware of the importance of age in the fashion world, the possibility became a reality.

“When you look back on your life, you realize that everything that's happened has brought you to where you are,” explains the Irish actress. “Every moment can fuel your future existence. I've been very fortunate to have had an interesting life up until now,” she acknowledges. The current moment is one in which the daily routine that has defined her life for the past 11 years has undergone a change, as filming for the series that brought her worldwide fame has ended. “I know I've been doing this for 15 years, but since I was on Outlander for so long, I feel like I'm starting a journey,” she confesses.

The first stop on this journey is Amateur (April 11 in theaters), a feature film starring Rami Malek in which

The actor best known for portraying Freddie Mercury in Bohemian Rhapsody is Charlie Heller, a brilliant CIA codebreaker who makes revenge for the death of his wife, murdered by a terrorist group, his most personal mission. To carry out this bloody task, he will have the help of a Russian hacker played by Balfe.

“When I read the script I thought, ‘This is fun,’” she confesses, before adding that although “these action movies are dominated by force, because everything revolves around the fights, Amateur is a very intelligent and very funny take on the genre.” Something that, added to the admiration she feels for Malek – “He’s a very interesting and unique actor” – with whom she had not worked but whom she knew “socially because we coincided at the Golden Globes,” led her to change the wardrobe of a 21st-century doctor during a break from filming the latest installment of Outlander.

XX who travels back in time 300 years through the life of a woman who lives in hiding today.

For the actress, the best part about the character is that she's "a lone wolf who lives in the shadows." She was inspired by Pussy Riot member Nadya Tolokonnikova because "I was trying to find someone who was very comfortable in English but had a Russian background," due to her character's accent, but also her motivations. "I really enjoyed finding in her a commitment to justice and integrity that isn't tainted by the influence of a regime," she acknowledges.

The revenge that drives Malek's character, and her own, is, for the actress, "very interesting to portray, because it's very different for each person: for some, it's debilitating and completely paralyzes them; for others, it propels them forward and leads them to do truly incredible things. That's a point where my role and Malek's diverge, but it also gives them this place where they connect deeply," she explains.

A childhood dream with an unexpected detour

The fourth of five siblings, with two other foster children at home, Caitríona Balfe grew up in rural Ireland dreaming of becoming an actress. “I was that annoying little girl,” she shares with a smile, “who would do little skits at home from the age of three or four. My dad used to do comedy sketches with his friends, so I think it was in my genes, in a way.” So when it came to choosing a career, she opted for acting. But she didn't expect that, while helping friends raise funds for multiple sclerosis, a man working for a modeling agency in Dublin would give her his card, and soon after, a French agency would sign her to work as a model in Paris.

She walked for fashion houses like Louis Vuitton and Chanel, but she defined herself as a "blue-collar model," one who lives on the ladder below supermodels and goes unnoticed. When she decided to return to acting in the 2000s, she moved to Los Angeles and took classes again. "I was very lucky because I met great teachers and it helped me regain my confidence," she shares, after acknowledging that "when you come from the fashion world, you get comfortable with rejection." After landing small roles in films and TV series, in 2013 she had been out of work for several months when her agent suggested she audition for Outlander. With no news, she organized a vacation, which she ultimately had to cancel because she was asked to travel to London for the final audition. After landing the role that brought her fame, she decided to leave Los Angeles for Scotland for a year.

More than a decade later, she still lives in Glasgow and enjoys spending time with her son, "because it was hard not to do so in recent years." A project as long-running as the series based on Diana Gabaldon's novels has been a "very hectic time, like being on a train that never stops." That unstoppable journey took her, among other destinations, to work on Belfast, the Kenneth Branagh film that earned her a Golden Globe nomination. "Now I enjoy the luxury of taking some time and choosing good projects," she admits, eager for the direction her new, yet highly experienced, career will take.

[bekaterrier]

Happy Audio Drama Sunday! I did a separate post earlier this week with my notes on the first part of my listen through of S3 of The Ways We Haunt Now, and the Pasithea Pandemonium bracket tournament of all the Pasithea Powder episodes is still ongoing! It's been so fun getting to gush about all their fantastic episodes!

@hinaypod Episode 52.1 - Winter Market: Okay that was too cute! Mari and Danny bonding time was so nice, and I'm sure such a relief for Danny. Finally someone he can talk to about all this! "He didn't know before but he understood now." And then the ring on the straw angel!! The emotions Mari could feel coming off of it! I'm a little scared for upcoming episodes because we have gotten so much sweetness and there's no way this can last... ✨

@vestaclinicpod Episode 20 - Haemohalter: Oh no, someone got bodily fluids on the special boy! That whole situation sounds like a nightmare to clean up. Rai is GETTING IT. Dang, Xael is a pro at not answering questions! I'm very suspicious about those lab alarms now though...do we think it has anything to do with the prof? Is his consciousness somehow hidden within the lab or something? I'm also worried about the clinic, with so many things in need of repair. Glad the engineer was able to come in to service everything (also you know she's gonna burn a hole in her nose sometime in the future while trying to self-cauterize). ⚕️

@kingmakerpod Chapter Twenty-Nine - Diminishing Returns: Ohhhh boy, there's no way this shrinking business is going to end well, right? Oh lord, those bonedrinker shrews sound horrifying. Okay, new horrifying thing, Culver and Crowley together. They are too well suited for each other...good for them. Giant bonedrinker shrews?! Wait, those instead of Corgis at the palace?! The Titanic?! Contact with the Kehrseite! Three Good Neighbour spies... So much was happening this episode! And the sound design was spot-on. Incredible. 💎

@monkeymanproductions' Waiting For October S1 Episode 6 - To The Mountain: Solo adventure time for Yvonne! The banter between her and Grey, and then with Bergen is great. Yvonne's full backstory is heartbreaking. The sound design of the mountain, the Bolter, Bergen, and the Kaiju are all fantastic. And hearing Bergen's perspective on living in a story world was so interesting. It's becoming clear that Karo is a very important part of October and I'm looking forward to finding out why. 🎃

[mayplantstarrwaters]

Some photos from Peter Sinfield's personal website - taken by Sinfield himself

[wszczebrzyszynie]

sending a big kiss to oskar MUAH

yay!

[shannonsketches]

something something foils moving in opposite directions Goku's always happy to seek and fight stronger opponents because he spent most of his life being the strongest guy in the room and Vegeta wants to be the strongest/is always exhausted to find stronger opponents because he spent most of his life having to navigate his survival around the whims of the strongest guy in the universe room and so Goku has a foundation of safety and stability and so spends his time craving challenge and adventure and Vegeta has a foundation of challenge and adventure and spends his time craving safety and stability and the overlaid section of their venn diagram is that the only way they know how acquire and maintain those things is through battle

[rorydrawsandwrites]

Due to my clicking habits there are increasingly more videos of feminist men on my Facebook feed

And I don't mind that one bit

[meraki-yao]

Happy two months to the RWRB movie.

I don't have much to say that I haven't already except for this movie, from the moment I watched the trailer, has made me the happiest I've been in a long, long time, and continues to be the light in my life that makes everything a bit brighter and better.

I love everything and everyone involved in making the movie such a wonderful experience with all my heart, which includes the fan community here too, so thank you guys as well

❤️🤍💙

[radio-4-is-static]

25コ目の染色体 | RADWIMPS

忘れてた泣き方 でも 今ここにある何か 目を閉じても零れそうな気がして

I will die for you, and I will live for you I will die for you, there is nothing more that I could really say to you