#i stayed up until 5am to write this

[lupusfloslunae]

I did it. This is an experiment I wanted to do for so long, so yeh, let's see if this story is more solid than the last one.

[snippydippy]

~Heart of Gold~

An "excerpt" of a much larger Fortnite story I'd love to write in it's entirety. Midas has something he needs Montague to know.

Quick shout out to @corvidazed & @stuffule for encouraging me to finish this after losing it to a power outage the first time. Love you guys! <3

Midas paced the floor in Montague's office, waiting for the man to finish his meeting with Oscar and Nisha so the two of them could speak. The tightness in his chest and buzz in his mind were almost as disturbing to him as the realization of his feelings for the Diamond Thief in the first place. Despite living a very long life, Midas had never felt quite like this before. He'd never been so entirely stricken by love. At least not that he could remember, and certainly not in this way that so perfectly fit the way people described it. He had been in many relationships, and had cared deeply for those involved, but not like this. Never once had he counted his footsteps for nerves while preparing to lay himself bare to anyone. Midas had been on the receiving end of such confessions a handful of times. For better or worse.

He hated this. He hated the spark of doubt that seemed to be trying to burn a whole in the back of his mind. It wasn't like himself to feel nervous. At the absolute least, this aggravating fear of rejection gave him some reassurance that his feelings for Montague must have been real. Not that there was much doubt in that regard at this point, he'd certainly spent enough sleepless nights ruminating on his emotions before deciding it was necessary to declare them.

Regardless of the outcome, he'd finally be able to move on from these childish feelings. He'd be able to stow the memories of the kiss they'd shared that constantly ran through his mind. He could put to rest the way he longed for more every time Montague made eye contact with him, touched his shoulder to get his attention, or when the ghost of a smile appeared on his lips before he remembered to be annoyed by flirtatious remarks.

Midas was thinking of that smile when he heard the door open and close behind the man who entered. The two exchanged a nod before Montague made his way behind his desk. He didn't sit, instead standing and looking over the map of the island displayed on its digital surface. He tapped at various points of interest to leave red pings.

"I'm afraid we don't have much time before we need to meet with Jones and the Banana. I'll need you there to make sure things go smoothly." He said, not looking up, "What did you need to discuss with me?"

Knowing he had to be quick about this did nothing to settle the hammering in his chest. Midas clenched his fists behind his back, willing himself to stop being ridiculous. He had very little reason to think Montague would refute him. And even if he did, oh well. It would be settled either way, and he would not walk away from this like some spurned teenager.

Midas took a step towards the desk, also looking down at the map. He spoke in a leveled voice, "I wanted to talk about us."

"Us?" Montague looked up, meeting Midas' neutral expression with mild annoyance before he sighed and raised an exasperated hand to rub his eyes, "Midas, we have talked about 'us'. I've already told you I cannot afford to be distracted--"

"I know what you said." Midas replied, not allowing anything other than resolve to creep into his tone, "I don't wish to talk about us in the context of a fling. I'm not suggesting we continue in the same vein as the…encounter, we had before."

"Encounter. That is one way to describe it." Montague huffed before he came around to the other side of the desk and stood beside Midas, "Fling or otherwise, I cannot prioritize a relationship. We do not have time for this."

Midas turned his body to face him, and a beat of silence passed between them as he thought about his next words. Montague went to speak again, but before he could say anything likely to reiterate him as a distraction, Midas let his shoulders relax (despite the vice grip he held on his wrist behind his back).

He spoke softly, calmly, "I love you, Montague."

Montague blinked, standing stiff, still and silent. The seconds that passed counted by the thudding of Midas' heart in his ears.

"You…" Montague finally let out a humorless type of scoff, "You what?"

A laugh of any kind was not the reaction Midas had wanted, but he supposed it could have been going worse. He wasn't being yelled or swung at, insulted, or told to vacate his office immediately. He took a step forward, closing the gap between them a fraction, but not breaching personal space just yet. Midas took pleased notice of how the other man did not step away. He still spoke softly, but with purpose, "I love you. I have taken time to try and understand what it is you stir in me, and I've realized it is my heart. You are my heart."

"Midas." The expression on Montague's face was difficult to read. Mostly, he looked surprised, if not a bit confused. However, the slight furrow of his brow while he looked off to his desk read to Midas like…sadness, of a kind. Another reaction he hadn't wanted. He watched as the other man sighed and brought a hand up to run it through hair that Midas yearned to feel nestled against his neck every night from now on, "I don't know what to say."

"Say the truth." Midas did reach out then, taking another small step forward to place golden hands over the other's waist. Montague said nothing, laying his own tentative hands on the other's arms. No matter how much all of these feelings perturbed him originally, the Golden King could do nothing to stop how they consumed him in this moment. He allowed a touch of the intensity he was feeling to seep into his tone, "Tell me you love me too."

Montague's eyes flicked about Midas' face before uncharacteristically casting down to the floor. This wasn't going exactly the way Midas had wanted, but he could fix it. He could convince Montague his feelings were true. There was no longer a spark of doubt in his mind, Midas needed Montague to reciprocate. Based on his behavior while they were alone together up until this point, he was certain he would.

"Or don't." Midas said, hesitating.

Montague swallowed and finally met his eyes. What Midas saw in them was so, complicated. Feelings almost as different as the color of his irises themselves. Midas moved in closer, their bodies together as his hands slipped around to the small of the other man's back. He continued, whispering as if saying it at a normal volume would be too convincing, "Say the words. Say that you don't want this. That you don't want me, and I will drop this forever. We will never speak of this again, I will forget, and we will be partners in business only. But…I need to hear you say it. If you can't, I will continue to love you until the day I truly die."

Montague remained silent, his body relaxing in the King's arms, eyes closing, and his hands languidly sliding up to Midas' shoulders.

A moment went by like this, and Midas' felt a relief--an elation, wash over him. Were it not for the armor he wore, Midas would believe the steady pounding of his heart could've been felt through his chest against Montague's. It wasn't the verbal affirmative he'd been hoping for, but he'd take an inability to reject him as an approval of sorts. With this, Midas knew Montague wanted him for something, and this delighted him. He smiled and pressed in closer still, their lips ghosting together as he whispered, "Monty--"

"I don't want you."

The words were as sharp as the diamonds Montague could coat himself in. Loud and clear, and yet they struck Midas dumb anyway. The hard rhythm of his heart seemed to cease entirely as his body froze. He didn't have any time to process before Montague spoke again, his tone as clear and calm as Midas' confession.

"I don't love you, Midas."

Midas pulled back just enough to look into Montague's eyes when he opened them. What he saw before was replaced entirely by the same steely gaze he'd seen the thief use in his business dealings. Something inside the King ruptured. The pain that came with it sending a shock through his limbs, numbing his fingers. A tremble might have started through him if he had any less control over himself.

Montague must have seen a shift in his expression, because he gently pushed back on the other's shoulders to replace some of the gap between them. Midas fought against the instinct that made his fingers twitch with the desire to hold Montague as close as he wanted to. Hands again settled on his waist, Midas desperately searched Montague's face for anything he could use to salvage this. He raked over his features for any sign of doubt or regret. He found nothing.

Midas closed his eyes and took in a long inhale to try and calm the raging storm brewing in his mind. He then stepped back, straightened, and his hands retreated back behind him. When he exhaled and opened his eyes again, Montague was mirroring his stance.

"Alright." Midas said plainly. Montague raised a brow at him, but he only gave a placid smile in return. He would not allow any of what he was feeling to show through. He could not. He extended his gilded mechanical hand to the other, "Partners it is then."

Montague studied the hand extended to him, and then the man behind it. Midas would later wonder if the other man's expression was as impossible to read as it seemed, or if he himself was simply too bereft in emotion to glean anything at all. The relief he felt when Montague did finally shake his hand was abysmal. His fingers were still numb when they let go, the thudding of his heart evidently serving no purpose but a futile attempt at mending itself in the moment.

"As it has been, call me whenever you need. I will be by your side at a moments notice." Midas spoke steadily. Montague nodded curtly before moving back around the desk, eyes cast to the map once more.

It took everything Midas had just to will himself to move, and even then he only managed to turn his head to look at the other, "I'm afraid my first act as solely your business partner will be to disappoint. I won't be able to attend the meeting with Peely and Jones."

Montague looked up at him, annoyance painfully clear on his features. Midas continued, "They have already agreed to aid us against any lingering gods. I'm sure everything will go fine in my absence." He finished before heading for the door.

"Midas, wait!" Montague called sharply, "Where are you going? I need you for this."

Midas stopped with his real hand gripping the door handle. He looked back with the same calm smile, "Montague. I told you I will move on from this, and I will. I did not say it would be easy."

There was a moment of silence, Midas did not bother trying to read the other's expression, "I need time."

"How much time?"

The question sent a flash of annoyance over Midas that quickly muddled together with everything else. How was he to know when he'd feel normal again? This was the first time he'd have to contend with heart break of this kind. And it had only just shattered, "Not long. A couple days."

"Fine." Montague said before his expression fell into something the King deeply resented, "I'm sorry, Midas."

Hearing this only compounded everything. Instead of allowing himself to boil over, Midas let out a single laugh, "You have nothing to apologize for. I asked for the truth."

Montague's eyes fell away from him. Midas opened the door then, not looking over his shoulder to say, "Don't pity me, Montague. It doesn't suite either of us."

He did not close the door behind him, a layer of gold having bloomed over the brass and wood.

[whumpy-wyrms]

does anyone wanna read super unhinged self indulgent thoughts about anton i wrote in my drafts at 3am last night. cuz wow

[tumsa]

Dear writer, what happens after? Does Kim leave him in that gym? Do Vegas and Kim ever talk about it when sober? I demand more comfort! :D

well, i am in need of a whole lot of comfort myself, so i'll play. this is not edited in any way, so excuse typos, long sentences, and whatever else happens.

- - -

Kim gets himself together quickly. He wipes tears with his shirt sleeve and bites his lip hard enough that it hurts. The pain keeps him grounded. Showing emotions is like being honest. It gets you in trouble. Kim knows because Kinn has replaced Tankhun, who is more astute and a lot better at detecting treachery than Kinn, all because Kinn looks more competent and is less emotional. All because Tankhun could not bottle everything up like everyone else. All because Tankhun says what's on his mind. Kim wonders if Korn has three sons just so he can swap out whatever he deems to be the weaker link.

Vegas dozes off despite the pain within minutes and stays asleep as Kim carefully cleans his wounds and places patches on the bigger ones that ooze blood whenever Vegas moves in his sleep. Kim removes the bloody shirt and throws it in a trash bag with whatever he used to clean the wounds. He considers putting the shirt in some cold water in the sink, but it's probably a lost cause already and the least of Vegas's problems. 

Kim knows he can call someone to pick Vegas up and get him home, but Vegas must have left the house for a reason. Kim decides that Vegas has had enough trouble for the day. He gathers foam mats from the room that houses leftover equipment and puts them together in a makeshift bed near the entrance. It's not a great place to sleep, but Kim wants to move Vegas only a little to prevent his wounds from reopening.

He moves purposely and efficiently until he runs out of things to do and he no longer has a task to throw his full attention at. Staring at Vegas, who is still out on the foam mats with his bruised and battered torso on display, Kim exhales shakily. In the dimly lit lights, relaxed in his sleep Vegas looks his age, barely twenty. It's easy to forget how young he is when he punches or throws Kim on the ground, when he laughs maniacally before pulling Kim closer, either for a kick or a kiss. Or when he talks about where to shoot or stab to kill someone, where to do it to make it really hurt. Make it count. Vegas is twenty and talks about torturing someone like Kim's friends talk about writing music. It gnaws at Kim and unsettles him how much he cares about Vegas. It's stupid.

Kim forces himself to turn away and find something else to do. He texts his bodyguards to let them know he won't be home. These days they don't trail him silently at his father's orders and stay away when Kim demands. Then he finds his bag, headphones and a phone charger and sits down in the tiny office room, between cardboard boxes and broken chairs. Then he spends the next few hours listening to music and talking his way out of checking on Vegas.

Nobody looks for Vegas. His phone stays silent the whole night. 

Around four in the morning, Kim can no longer keep his eyes open no matter how much he tries. He considers going home but doesn't want to leave Vegas alone. Doesn't want to be alone either. 

Carefully, to not disturb him, Kim lays down on a foam mattress next to Vegas. There's still a scent of alcohol mixed with whatever perfume Vegas prefers these days and the wound solution Kim used. This close, Kim can see he missed a few blood splatters on the cheek and chin when cleaning up the split lip. It looks painfully swollen.

Sleep finally wins.

- - -

Kim wakes up because Vegas is making quiet, whiney noises. He's awake, sitting beside Kim, covering his face with his arms. Kim opens his mouth to ask how Vegas feels but stops himself. He wants to allow Vegas to leave while he thinks Kim is asleep. Vegas can disappear as he always does after their fights, and they can never mention this again. Kim can already imagine their next fight; Vegas will ensure Kim knows there is nothing soft or vulnerable between them, and Kim's ribs will hurt for days.

"Fuck," Vegas murmurs in English, as he always does around Kim these days. Kim guesses there's a hangover that's pounding Vegas's head and a layer of shame and regret on top of it. If their places were swapped, Kim would be mortified. 

Vegas doesn't move while Kim tries to focus on even, slow inhales and exhales. And he thinks he has the "pretending to be asleep" role under control until Vegas touches him. He takes Kim's left arm and moves it away from Kim's side. For a moment, Kim thinks that Vegas will do something insane, like stab him in the sleep, dig a grave and bury Kim with his secrets. He wonders if Vegas can feel his heart picking up the speed as he moves Kim's hand enough to lie down in its place. 

Kim freezes, only for a second, and wills himself to stay relaxed as Vegas wraps himself around Kim's body carefully, still making tiny pained noises. Once settled, Vegas presses his cheek against Kim's shirt and settles.

Kim tries to breathe normally, but Vegas can probably hear his racing heartbeat because he grips Kim's side and then pets it as to soothe a startled animal. 

"I'm cold," Vegas murmurs. "Move your arm."

Kim snorts at the audacity but obeys and moves his arm around Vegas's shoulder. "Better?"

"Much better," Vegas replies, yawning. He's unbothered with the whole cuddling situation, and Kim can feel Vegas's weight relax against his body. 

Like a kid who got away with stealing candy Kim smiles to himself and lets the even sounds of Vegas's breath lull him back to sleep. 

[non-un-topo]

Yeah personal essays are rough but have you ever had to write two separate autoethnography papers about your relationship to gender while you're going through the beginning stages of transition after a major identity crisis?

[ranger-kellyn]

it's too late in the night for me to start working on it, but i think i'm going to attempt to write that silly love story juliana/nemona fic i mentioned a few months ago this week. a little writing exercise of sorts i guess ovo

[ishizizzle]

Can't believe I'm about to edit my fic when I get home girl what year is it

[yoursonlucifer]

sandra oh....

[gaydryad]

here's a secret no one tells you about making a conlang, particularly a synthetic one: unless you're going the auxlang or minimalist route, every word you want to create is secretly a cluster of 4-6 words, and even though it takes hours by the end you will have only actually expanded the lexicon by like, two concepts

[captainsophiestark]

Unexpected Guest

Dick Grayson x Reader

Masterlist - Join My Taglist!

Written for my personal fic writing challenge for 2024, Sophie's Year of Fic! Featuring a new fic being posted every Friday, all year long :)

Fandom: DC

Summary: Dating a vigilante sometimes leads to a few false alarm scares, but Dick Grayson couldn't be happier with how well his partner rolls with his crazy family.

Word Count: 1,410

Category: Fluff

Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.

Crash!

My eyes shot open at the sound of a noise from the living room of the apartment I shared with my boyfriend, Dick Grayson. The man in question still snored peacefully next to me, annoyingly, but a quick glance at the clock told me why. It wasn't quite 5am, and Dick had been out patrolling until one in the morning. I listened carefully for any other noises in the apartment. I didn't want to wake my poor boyfriend up unless I absolutely had to.

After a few minutes of nothing, I heard another crash followed by a tense voice and what sounded like hushed swearing. This time, I didn't hesitate to roll over and whack Dick on the chest, hard.

His eyes shot open and he was half sitting up when I managed to throw a hand over his mouth to keep him from giving away that we were awake. My wide eyes must've tipped him off to something being wrong, because I immediately saw him shift from sleepy to ready for action.

Slowly, I dropped my hand from his mouth and leaned in to whisper in his ear.

"There's someone in our living room. I heard two crashes and someone swearing."

Dick nodded once, then motioned with his hands while mouthing 'stay here'. He hopped off the bed, grabbing his escrima sticks from where he'd thrown them onto the dresser, then stalked towards the door with catlike grace and stealth. After a minute, I decided I couldn't just let him go alone, superhero or no, so I grabbed the bat I kept by my side of the bed and followed after him.

Dick popped out the door, and after a moment without hearing anything, I followed, bat at the ready. I found my boyfriend with one hand on his hip, weapons down, staring into the kitchen. I followed his gaze to find none other than Jason Todd in our kitchen, a mixing bowl and some eggs in front of him and a look with a significant lack of guilt on his face.

"What? I was after somebody and it dragged me all the way to Bludhaven. I needed a place to crash that was closer than Gotham."

Dick and I both shook our heads. As the oldest of a very high number of siblings, his apartment had become a second home base for every single other batkid. When we'd finally moved in together last month, he'd warned me I needed to be prepared for things like this.

"Glad you know to help yourself, Little Wing," said Dick with a sigh, waving one tired hand to Jason before turning and heading back to bed. I squeezed his shoulder and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek as he passed me, then headed into the kitchen with a smile.

"My tax for you making me think I'd have to fight off an assailant with a bat at five in the morning is my own serving of whatever you're making," I said, taking a seat on one of the kitchen island stools. Jason raised an eyebrow at me.

"You're not going back to bed?"

"Nah. Unlike Dick, I got to bed at a somewhat reasonable hour last night, so the adrenaline dump isn't threatening to put me to sleep. I'd rather hang out with you, especially since you're a better cook than Dick and I combined. I'm not missing out on that."

Jason snorted, cracking an egg and resuming his cooking all the same.

"Dick contributes nothing to your combined cooking score," he said. "I'm pretty sure he's burned cereal before."

I laughed. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure you're right. He's gotten better though. We watch the Food Network and look up recipes to make together, and I can trust him with way more than I used to be able to."

"If you could teach him anything it'd be a miracle," said Jason with a snort. I just hummed, trying to pick up some new skills of my own as I watched Jason cook.

"To be totally fair to him, I once forgot what I was doing and strained soup because I was on autopilot for pasta."

Jason barked a laugh, unable to hold himself back, and looked at me with a grin and a raised eyebrow.

"Really?" I nodded. "That's pathetic."

I just shrugged. "Yeah. But at least there's not a lot of places to go but up, after that."

"I guess so."

Jason and I chatted as he cooked and I watched, keeping our voices low so Dick could sleep—although, after the night he'd had, he'd probably sleep through a train in our living room. After breakfast, Jason decided to go down for a nap on the couch, passing out almost as soon as we'd put the last few dishes in the sink. I just smiled, threw a blanket over him, and wandered back into the bedroom to find Dick.

It was late enough in the morning now that my boyfriend was officially up and about, stretching by the bed with his hair still a little messed up from sleeping. I grinned and flopped down against the headboard as he crossed the room to the dresser to pull out clothes.

"How's Jaybird?" he asked. "Still a good cook?"

"Still a great cook. And he's good. He seems a little wiped out from patrols and stuff, though. He's taking a nap on the couch right now."

Dick smiled and shook his head. "I get up and he goes to sleep. Typical."

"Clearly he's avoiding you."

"Clearly."

Dick and I shared a smile, and then he sighed.

"I'm going to take a shower. Hopefully Jason will be up by the time I'm out, because I actually have things to do today."

I smiled, shifting on the bed to pull the covers over myself. "I'm sure you can be quiet if he's not. Wake me up when you're out of the shower, okay? A post-breakfast nap sounds too good to resist right now."

My boyfriend laughed. "Alright, will do. I'll wake you and Jason up when I'm out."

"Mhm. Good luck with him."

"Thanks, I'm gonna need it."

I closed my eyes, getting comfortable and ready for my nap, but before I drifted off I heard Dick's shuffling footsteps crossing the room to stand by my side of the bed. A second later, he sat down next to me, the bed dipping under his weight. I cracked an eye open to squint at him.

"What do you want?"

He grinned at me and chuckled.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to interfere with your nap. I just... I wanted to say how much I appreciate you, and how good you are with my family. They mean the world to me, but I know having vigilantes dropping in at all hours of the day and night can be a little much to deal with. So thank you for being so wonderful about it, and about them."

I sighed, sitting all the way up and propping myself up on my hands to look Dick in the eye.

"Dick, I love you. And I love your family. Sure, it took a little getting used to some of the vigilante stuff, but the longer I know them the more I love them. You don't have to thank me for anything. They're my family too."

Dick absolutely beamed at me, wrapping one arm around my back and pulling me in for a kiss. I immediately reciprocated, tangling one hand in the hair at the nape of his neck. I smiled into the kiss and a moment later, Dick deepened it. We were right on the edge of escalating into something more, but both thought better of it at the last moment.

"I should take a shower," he said, still looking a little reluctant as he pulled away.

"Yeah, and you should stop interrupting my nap."

Dick snorted, rolling his eyes as he finally stood and headed for the bathroom. I grinned after him as he went, flopping back down onto my pillow only as Dick closed the bathroom door.

I took a deep breath and sighed, a smile on my face, as I closed my eyes for the second time. I heard the water start in the bathroom, and a faint smell of breakfast still hung in the air. I was surrounded by people I loved dearly, and who loved me right back. No matter the scare Jason had given me when he'd shown up, I couldn't ask for a better start to my morning than this.

****************

Everything Taglist: @rosecentury @kmc1989

DC Taglist: @luv-ghostie

[hmhas-00]

Ch. 2

Hit me Hard & Soft

word count - 1.6k

A/N - dont forget to like and rb ♡

Starting next week, my new posting schedule will be Tuesdays & Thursdays! Stay tuned!

Billie's POV

Sitting in my studio, I tweaked with the autotune feature to perfect the extended version of L’amour De Ma Vie. I didn’t realize it was already 5AM until my phone buzzed. I looked down at my lap as the screen lit up, showcasing a text from Remy.

Remy: Wish me luck! Fingers crossed I’m not fired after last week. 5:02am

Billie: 🤞🏻 5:02am

Billie: I’ll pick you up later and we’ll head to the Rolling Stone interview together? 5:03am

My eyes glossed over the screen waiting for her to reply, as I straightened my back on the chair. I locked it and put it on the table, returning my focus to my production set up. With the amount of bullshit she’s dealing with, I have a feeling Remy might bail today and I can’t blame her. In the back of my mind, I wished she wouldn’t. Finneas was so busy with his own album, so I told him to do his own thing tonight. Truth is, I didn’t want to show up to any of these things alone. Was that selfish? Lately, everything I feel is amplified, including that lonely, empty feeling I get around normal people bedtime. That’s when I did my best writing in the past year. It’s nerve-racking having all of my thoughts and emotions broadcasted to the world, and now that the tour is coming up, all I can think about is how I’ll do it alone.

The phone buzzed, bringing me out of my own mind. Upon opening, I sighed and replied while getting up to finally go to bed.

Remy: I’ll just meet you there. I have a lot of work to do today I don’t wanna make you late. 5:15am

Billie: Okay, see you there. 5:15am

𓇼𓇼𓇼𓇼𓇼𓇼

The alarm rattled my brain, startling me to death. I flopped down my arm, patting around next to me and managed to find the source. My phone had 2 missed calls and a text from Remy. She let me know she’d be a bit late but would make it no matter what. Pulling a hair tie out of my tangled mess, I dragged my tired body out of bed to get ready for the interview.

𓇼𓇼𓇼𓇼𓇼𓇼

“Billie, you’re going to be sitting over here, and Gabe is going to be interviewing you today, sitting over there.”

The coordinator waved me over in the right direction. I sat quietly and waited for the crew to finish up lighting and camera. Eventually, my interviewer walked over and made himself comfortable.

I laughed in disbelief and looked over at the coordinator, “Gabe?”

“Yup.” He leaned forward, holding his hand out to shake mine. He looked so pleased with himself. I ignored his reach, raising my brow. “Okay… nice to see you again, Billie.” He sat back and stifled a laugh.

I chewed on the inside of my cheek, and glared at him. Thinking about having to act civil around this piece of garbage for the cameras is making me sick. God, I cannot stand him and his stupid face.

“Are we ready?” He cleared his throat.

I adjusted in my seat, looking around one more time past the studio lights and saw no Remy. “Yeah.” I could tell these bright lights would bring on a wave of tics, if not the unfortunate situation before me. Cameras closed in and the interview began.

I was basically on autopilot, trying not to destroy this man with my eyes. The last time I was face to face with Remy’s ex was 2 years ago. I was screaming at him to get the fuck out of her apartment. She made him pick up his things after he broke up with her for some other girl. Gabe swore he was just chasing a job offer in NYC, but Remy had seen messages between him and someone else planning to meet up. I stood at Remy’s side as he denied everything. He started a crazy argument and threw a glass across the room. I was on the other side of the room faster than he could react. Remy had never seen me that angry before.

“So! Your fans want to know. Who did you write Lunch about?” Gabe asked, knowing it would piss me off.

“That’s what you want to ask me? Of all things?” I laughed.

“Curious if I know her, is all.” He shifted in his seat and shrugged, nonchalantly. I wanna rip off his dumb smirk so bad.

I looked over at the cameras to have my very own The Office moment, but my eyes were drawn to none other than Remy. She awkwardly stood with her arms folded. I gave her a satisfied smile and when she waved at me, I quickly realized this is the last situation she probably wanted to walk into.

“No, It’s just a metaphor. I want people to think about who they want to eat for lunch. It’s just a fun song.” I crossed my legs and resumed eye contact with him, reminding myself to not look unfriendly for the cameras.

“You’re obviously very private about your love life.” He flipped through his notecards. I tilted my head, focusing on how stupid his stage voice sounds. “You came out last year-”

“This isn’t exactly news.” I squinted my eyes, smiling sarcastically. “Do you have any questions about my new album, Gabe?” I chuckled a bit.

He laughed, brushing me off. He asked a few questions about the album and I dragged out the answers as much as I could, so he wouldn’t have time to ask anymore stupid questions.

I managed to muscle through the rest of the interview and as soon as it was over I walked over to Remy, leaving him behind.

We walked into the room I left my phone in. “What the fuck.” Remy mouthed and pulled me into a hug.

“I know, let’s fucking go.” I grabbed her arm and started walking towards the exit.

“Remy! Hey!” Gabe shouted, making his way over to us. “How have you been?”

I could feel Remy mentally wilting away. “Good, good…Crazy seeing you here.” She spoke softly, smiling timidly.

“Well, I’ve been great!” He held his arms out, arrogant as can be, as if anyone asked.

“Did New York not work out?” I butted in.

“It did, but Los Angeles is home, you know?” He responded matter-of-factly, not even bothering to look at me. “You know I just chase better gigs. Better opportunities.”

“Yeah… Good for you, I’m happy for you, Gabe.” She smiled, keeping her voice sweet and mellow.

“You still working at uhh…” This idiot couldn’t even remember where she worked. I always hated him. He didn’t care enough about her. She deserved way better.

“Yeah, I’m-“ Remy was cut off.

“Maybe we should grab lunch one day. Catch up, you know?” He stepped closer to her.

I watched her face as she struggled to come up with an excuse. “Uh, I don’t know. Maybe-“

“She’s actually good, she just doesn’t want to hurt your little feelings.” I crinkled my nose as I forced a smile at him, turning us towards the door.

“Billie, it’s fine-“ Remy grabbed my arm with her free hand and held it there.

Gabe laughed, knowing how deep under my skin he could get. “You look good, Rem. We’ll talk later without distractions.” He looked her up and down, licking his bottom lip.

I glared at him, imagining me shoving him away from her just like I did a couple years ago.

He looked down at me and paused for a second, his lips forming an overly confident smirk. He stood close enough for me to smell that gross overpowering cologne. I could feel myself tensing up and clenching my jaw.

“What, you don’t get enough attention?” I lifted my chin, looking in his dark eyes.

He breathed out a laugh, poking his tongue into his cheek. “Why, you want to share some with me?”

I took a step forward, causing Remy to put her arm between us. “Come on, Billie.” She put some pressure on his chest, causing him to lean back a bit. “Let’s go.”

He looked down at Remy’s hand pressing on his chest, then back at me sneering.

“Billie, please.” I let Remy pull me away, knowing if I stayed any longer I’d break something on his face.

He laughed to himself. “It was nice seeing you both. Good to see nothing has changed.”

“Yeah, absolutely nothing.” Remy emphasized, pushing me in front of her so we’d walk away.

We walked out past the fans screaming and reaching their hands through the holes on the fence, and straight into her car. As much as it killed me not to say goodbye to them, I didn’t have it in me to fake it.

“I hated that.” Remy began, starting her car and letting out a deep breath.

“I’m sorry, Remy, I could not stand his stupid fucking face. He was doing that shit to be disrespectful and I’m not gonna let him-“

“You can’t do shit like that! What if someone saw and wrote or posted about it?”

I put my seatbelt on, knowing I could’ve taken the high road.

“Dude you’re not actually thinking about seeing him right?”

“What? No! Why would I?” She pulled out of the parking lot, careful not to hit any fans.

“You seemed happy to see him.” I looked out the window as the people waving blurred from the increase in speed.

“No. I wasn’t. I just wasn’t going to attack him in front of his coworkers, Billie.”

“His team wasn’t in the room.” I mumbled.

She didn’t respond.

“I’m sorry, I just fucking hate him. He’s such a piece of shit.”

“Shit, did you date him too?” She laughed under her breath, looking over at me momentarily.

I laughed, shaking my head and realizing how fast things escalated. My body finally relaxed, sinking into the seat and running my hands through my hair.

[tbgblr2]

Cruising to a new life - Part 8

(Some may say at long last… sorry just been having a real bad time of getting motivated to write with work chaos ruling my life. Hopefully this won’t go so many months without a follow up…)

- - - -

I was roused from my sleep by the sound of my phone going off with a message. My sleep-addled brain immediately went to wonder who was messaging me until I realised that I was at sea, and we wouldn’t get mobile signal here. Jodie’s phone went off a second or two later, and that’s when we realised it was a shipwide message.

Picking up my phone, as Jodie did the same, we both looked at each other. “Adriana’s in labour” we both said to each other simultaneously.

The message was ship wide from Charles and said that Adriana had started having contractions at 5am that morning and wanted to start her video diary of her labour as soon as soon as she could. Over the course of the last 3 hours – checking my watch it was 8am – they have developed and became regular. She would like to invite everyone to the cinema to watch at their own convenience. Charles added at the end – it may be difficult viewing for some so individual discretion is advised. The standard cinema screenings would be put on hold whilst the video diary was being transmitted to the ship.

Jodie had already started tapping away on her phone. “Jess is going there right now, she’s been awake for an hour or two already.” Jodie’s hand rubbed her bump absentmindedly. “I’m sure this one has seen enough babies coming out of people now to get the hint… who knows we might be next.”

I kissed her. “We can only hope babe.” I laughed as I rolled out of bed and wandered over to the shower, the rush of water drowning out any other noise that could be heard.

As we got ourselves presentable and headed down to the cinema we realised just how popular this ‘event’ was going to be. We had to wait for 3 different lifts to arrive as the crowds were filling them as they passed but eventually we managed, with a sigh of relief, to get inside the lift car as the doors shut in front of us with a ding.

As we entered into the cinema we were greeted with a who knows how many hundred inch view of Adriana’s face as she was kneeling in a birthing tub, arms crossed on the edge as she looked into the camera and was narrating away.

“The labour pains are frequent but manageable. I’ve been using gas and air to take away the worst of it. Charles has been a welcome distraction and my dear Miguel has been his ever professional self throughout.” She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, we presumed this was a signal that a contraction had started, all but guaranteed by the hum escaping her mouth.

We noticed she still had on some sort of top covering in the pool, a sports bra or similar, but with her proclivity for nakedness we had to wonder how long that would stay on. Jodie even turned to me and whispered “do you think she has knickers on?” Which I’ll admit did bring a little chuckle.

We spied Jess and headed over that way as she was sitting in one of the comfy seats, with her hand rubbing her belly absentmindedly she hadn’t even noticed us approaching. Jodie sat down next to her and it was only as she realised there was a space occupied did Jess even acknowledge our arrival.

“Something up?” I asked, noticing she was paying special attention to her midsection.

“I think I might be in labour” Jess talk-whispered loud enough that we could hear but hoping it won’t carry. “But Miguel is obviously otherwise occupied… as you can see” she gestured to the screen where Jess’s lover could be seen wheeling over the bottle of gas and air and handing the mouthpiece to Adriana.

“If you are, you’re going to need to be seen” Jodie admonished, a little shocked that Jess would put the health of herself and her baby in place of the promise that Miguel made to deliver her baby.

“I will, I mean she looks worse off that me, my contractions are only light. We might get to watch this baby be born then I get in right on after” she giggled at least showing her sense of humour wasn’t affected.

I took a moment to change the subject “is your mum coming?” I asked. Jess shook her head.

“She’s not had much sleep what with the baby and me pacing around for hours” again another dirty look from Jodie “so she’s decided to nap when she can. It’s not like me trying to learn something, she’s done it a couple of times now…”

“… and you’ll experience it first hand soon” interrupted Jodie, still not letting the subject lie.

“Yup” grimaced Jess as she pulled her dress tight to her bump and we both saw it change shape, almost becoming oblong as the contraction gripped at Jess and squeezed. It stayed that way for a good minute until it returned to its normal shape and she started breathing normally again. We both looked completely gobsmacked as this event unfolded only a few feet from us.

Jess pulled her phone out from her bag as she tapped a message. We couldn’t see what she wrote but turned to see Miguel in the background on the big screen pick up his phone and tap something, only to hear Jess’s phone buzz a moment later. It was clear they were talking at least.

Jodie huffed in resignation knowing she wasn’t getting Jess to move anywhere so offered her hand for her cruise mate to hold as we all turned towards the big screen.

Adriana was getting out of the pool aided by both Charles and Miguel, her soaked body raising up. Jodie won the bet, she had nothing on from her waist down. As she stepped over the wall of the birthing pool she announced to the camera “I’ll ask Miguel to check my progress then I want to labour outside the pool a little. Movement is very important. You shouldn’t feel constrained to any one place, keep moving, your baby… and hips… will thank you for it.”

Charles brought over a towel and wrapped it around his wife, patting her down and getting rid of as much of the excess water as he could. After both were satisfied, she plodded over to the bed where she lifted her bum up onto it and swung her legs around so she had them splayed open to the camera with everything on display. This brought a few unexpected gasps from the onlooking crowd but from what I knew of Adriana from the few days I had known her, this wasn’t exactly unexpected.

She narrated again as Miguel gloved up a hand and applied some gel to his fingers. “Miguel will enter his fingers into me and he can feel how much my cervix has dilated. It was previously at 5cm but I’m hoping for more” she said as she shuffled back on the bed. She held her breath and breathed a out as Miguel put his hand between his sisters legs, the camera man following around to catch the examination in detail. Miguel’s fingers had all but disappeared when he abounded “you’re at 6. You’re progressing.” That was when Jess gripped Jodie’s hand tight as another contraction assaulted her middle, catching her off guard.

Over the course of the next 3 hours or so the cinema was somewhat abuzz with activity. Some families came and sat for an hour or two, but most seemed to tire of watching the stream eventually, some rejoined it again after leaving for food or some other activities. Some had babies with them at this point and when they got fussy they left the auditorium to save spoiling things for others.

We however, sat enraptured. I had to pop out for food to make sure we kept our growling stomachs satisfied – and it was during one of these trips out that Jess announced she was going back to her room, the confines of the seat too much for her. Having witnessed Adriana going through a particularly tough contraction, and it being echoed in parallel by Jess just next to us, Jodie made sure that I escorted her back to the lifts.

I’ll be honest and say it was the slowest walk of my life. Jess firstly wanted to go outside for fresh air, but had a plodding walk along the deck and stopped 3 times. I asked if each were contractions but she shook her head. “I’m just big” she laughed looking out to sea and resting against a railing.

“It might not be appropriate, but damn it, can you rub my back please?” She asked, almost groaning. I’m guessing that was a contraction. I did as I was asked, knowing fine well comfort was more important than decorum at times like this. It had the desired effect, Jess’s groan turning into something a lot happier sounding as I rubbed her back.

“Now right down the bottom squeeze my hips.” I realised she was echoing something she watched Adriana do when coping with a contraction, though in her case she was on all fours in the tub and Charles was knee deep in the water behind her. Thankfully Jess didn’t try and get down on all fours mid deck.

“Oh that’s the good stuff. You remember this for Jodie, because this right here is golden” Jess surprisingly had all but lost the sound of pain in her voice and seemed to be coping a lot better after my ministrations. She moved off soon after and we returned indoors to the lift, pressing the button. A few moments later Jess gave me a hug as she stepped inside. I wished her good luck in case I didn’t see her again as the door closed in front of me.

I dashed back to the auditorium to meet up with Jodie again and relayed what had happened with Jess. She in turn explained that Adriana had now not spoken for at least 10 minutes, she was more lost in her contractions than anything, even going so bad as to be yowling in pain as she goes through them. She seemed to be having it real tough – perhaps, we thought, much tougher than she expected. Jodie did confide in me that she was worried about going overdue and finding the baby be too big to push out. I told her that it’s really unlikely, and in all of the birth videos we had watched together – and let me tell you it was a lot – we had never seen anyone struggle as much as Adriana seemed to be doing at the moment.

We had lost sight of Jess for over an hour at this point and to be frank we were starting to wonder if she was still in her room with her mum or if she’d moved on to delivery by now. On the screen in front of us, Adriana was not doing so well. Her attempts at being a calm, collected labouring mother were long gone as the tears streamed down her face and she yelled out with abandon. She was presumably deep in transition now, her pains seemingly all but on top of each other but Charles was there to support her, rubbing her back, getting in close and whispering what we presume were affirmations to her ear as she struggled.

Adriana was on her knees in the pool with her arms crossed on the edge, alternating between her forehead and her chin resting on her arms. We were presuming there was no sign of the baby and she wasn’t pushing as the cameraman was stoicly sat in front of her - last time he moved around the pool was to catch Miguel leaning in over the edge of the to check her progress where he announced she was 8cm and nearly there. We don’t know if Adriana actually realised in her state.

Suddenly we see Miguel’s phone ring and he answered it. Whilst we could only see his half of the conversation on camera we guessed the other participant would be Jess by the context of the conversation.

“So soon? Ok please tell me you don’t need to push just yet…. Oh good can you get here? Ok I can’t leave Adi just yet, she’s struggling…. Yes baby I know you are too. Come up here and I’ll let you in. Get here by my room… ok take it slow and ring when you get here I’ll dash through.”

Charles looked up with a quizzical look. “Jess?” he enquired.

“Jess” confirmed Miguel.

That caused Charles to sigh. “I need you to look after your sister she is struggling more than I expected.”

We weren’t expecting to see some sort of family argument playing out on the big screen in front of us but here it was. Miguel took control though “I know what I’m doing. Let me do my job. 2 babies at once is unfortunate but nothing I can’t handle especially when they’re both in the same room and I can keep track of each of them together.”

Charles nodded. “So be it, you’re the expert.” You could tell he wasn’t exactly pleased at the prospect though.

“It’s my decision” confirmed Miguel as he walked off camera.

Charles did what he could to explain the situation to Adriana in a moment of lucidity between contractions and to give his wife her due, she nodded, presumably confirming understanding as she went back to putting her forehead on her arms and letting out a sorrowful moan as the next contraction picked up.

Miguel came back on camera leading Jess by the hand a few moments later. We were somewhat of a close knit community on the ship so there’s a chance that the unexpected arrival was known to many, but Miguel offered no explanation to the camera he just lead her off screen to the other side. Some murmurs were heard in the cinema so perhaps not everyone knew our friend and the relationship she was developing with Miguel.

Charles looked up at the camera and said “Adriana please” - presumably he was being asked who the camera should focus on, the directional mic masking the voice behind the camera.

In the background of the shot - the pool in the foreground and the bed in the back - Miguel had unzipped Jess’s dress and lifted it over her head. She was dressed in a sports bra and light blue maternity panties which came up the underside of her bump, but what was most obvious about them was the dark patch between her legs. We could only presume her waters had broke and she panicked resulting in the phone call.

She didn’t seem in much distress - at least compared to Adriana - as she had her underwear dropped to the floor by Miguel, resting her hands on his shoulders as she stepped out of them. She lifted her bra off herself then flung her arms around Miguel’s shoulders and practically fell into him as she groaned herself.

Miguel, in response could be heard saying “breathe, pant through it. Don’t push! Let me check your progress first” and it was obvious that Jess was much more progressed along her labour journey than what Adriana was at this point in time.

Jess managed to form words around her grunts. “I’m trying baby, it’s too hard, the baby is right there, he’s going to come out…” it ended with a yell. She seemed to squat down a little hanging deeper off his shoulders.

Adriana in turn looked up to the camera then to the side calling for Charles. He dashed around to the front blocking the view of the cameraman, who stepped to the side, taking Jess and Miguel out of shot.

“Charles, Charles… the head. I can feel it, it’s stretching me. I need to push! I need to push!” She was frantic, her hands reaching out to grab Charles’s who in turn held them tight.

“Miguel, she needs to push! Can she push!” Bellowed Charles, concern for his wife etched on his face.

Miguel yelled out “Pant Adi, don’t give in, I’ll be there in a moment… and DONT PUSH!” He emphasised the last part. The cameraman panned over taking Adriana and Charles out of the shot to focus on Miguel and Jess as he was helping her up on the bed and unceremoniously poked 2 fingers between her legs. “Jess, baby. You’re good push when you’re ready. I need to check on Adi a moment.”

Jess’s eyes grew wide and she was about to yell out something about him staying with her as she suddenly curled over and lay on her side on the bed, hooking one leg back - the primal need to push had taken over.

Miguel looked distraught his eyes darting between his sister and lover but he knew Adi needed him more right that second. As the cameraman followed Miguel he bound the few steps it took to get over to the pool to check on Adriana.

He checked her over and confirmed she was at 10cm dilation also and could push when she was ready. Her first attempt was met with a wailing, sorrowful sound but Miguel congratulated her. “That’s it, you’re doing the right thing. Keep that jaw loose. Make as much noise as you need, it really helps things along.”

He looked up to Jess and she was doing somewhat the opposite. Chin to her chest, her face going beet red with effort, she pulled her leg back so far it was squashing tight against her belly, her knee essentially meeting her nipple. Miguel shook his head as he asked Charles to keep Adi focused on pushing and went back to looking after Jess.

“Release, release baby. Breathe, breathe, breathe” he chanted at Jess as his hand met her knee. She gasped and let go of her leg. “Remember the baby needs oxygen. Big gulps of air between pushes. No more than 10 seconds each one.” Jess nodded understanding and gasped a lungful of air as she resumed the position. “Good… good. That’s it. Now breathe!”

Jess gasped and was left panting. “Is that the contraction over?” Asked Miguel. Jess nodded. “Good, take a moment to relax.”

“Is she ok?” Asked Jess, looking over to Adriana.

“She’s good. Struggling a bit, but she’ll get there. Let me worry about her and you worry about yourself and this little one” he said gently resting a hand on Jess’s belly. “I know this isn’t what you wanted, but baby’s come at the time they want and often ruin peoples plans. Just know I’m here for you but I also need to look after my sister.”

Jess nodded understanding as the need to push came back on her. “Good” said Miguel enthusiastically “you’ve got the hang of it, remember to breathe!” As he left her to return to Adriana.

Adriana in turn had flopped back into more of a sitting position in the pool. She had braced her feet against indents in the sides and held on to bars designed to give leverage. Charles had moved back into position behind his wife as the camera was front and centre catching her spread legged position in the main shot. However we could still see Jess in the background taking part in her own battle as Miguel dashed from lady to lady to try and give each as much support as he could.

Jess was the first to crown. The camera of course wasn’t focused on it but we could still see the action happening. Jess’s pushing was much more inward and grunting, Adriana yelling and screeching with each contraction. We saw her lips part and the head come out in about a 2 minute window, Jess giving her own yelp of pain as the head was born. Miguel kept up her spirits with affirmations and coaching then suddenly with a grunt and gush of fluid we watched as Jess’s baby was pushed out and placed on her chest. The sound of a crying baby in the room rang louder than even Adriana’s wails and she stopped, desperately trying to turn around to see what was going on behind her, but her body not letting her.

Adriana’s moment of respite was short lived as she went back into pushing. At this point her lips were bulging outward to show the shape of the head that was so near, yet seemingly so far from being born. She grunted and yelled, and ironically it was the cameraman who yelled out from behind the camera “I can see baby’s hair.”

This seemed to buoy Adriana, who actually smiled, but that smile turned into a grimace as the next contraction forced her to push again. Her lips parted and sure enough the auditorium could clearly see the dark patch between her legs. Charles rubbed her shoulders telling her she was doing great and to keep it up, but what he didn’t see from the room was the collective ‘aww’ we all gave as we saw the head sink back out of view as the contraction let up.

Now admittedly we all knew that this was the process and how it would take several pushes for the head to crown… but for Adriana who was struggling so much it felt like a cruel irony.

[lowkeyrobin]

hello:))

been loving ur mcyt preferences, and was wondering if you would do one where reader has insomnia???

I take medication for it and i got took off it for a break UGHH. anyways luv ur writing and take ur time plz:))

ooooo okay!! ; and thank you thank you, I appreciate it 🫶🫶🫶

MCYT ; insomniac/night owl

includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, badlinu, nihachu, & quackity

warnings ; language, sleep paralysis, jokes about OD'ing (melatonin)

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

genuinley feels so bad bc the second he closes his eyes, he's passed the hell out

he'll try and stay awake with you though and wait for the melatonin or just sleep in general to kick in

"if you're too tired to work, then don't. go back to sleep, don't worry about it"

compares you to tubbo 24/7

will bring you cherries and some milk because natural melatonin ❗️❗️

sometimes he'll try and stay awake with you and turn a movie on and he'll just pass out on your shoulder

you'll walk into his stream after sleeping until like 5 in the evening and quietly wave with a groggy look on your face

he laughs (in a very lighthearted way dw)

"y/nnnnn I know you're tired but we gotta go before we miss it"

"I'm coming, I'm coming"

you're basically just a night owl, like his personal guard dog lmao

he'll joke about it a bit too, how you're protecting him in the dark from the monsters 😭

RANBOO

he can and will stay up all night with you

mostly plays video games with you in hopes you'll get tired that way

which works a bit

does insane amounts of research, gets you eating all sorts of natural melatonin before bed and even gets you like children's melatonin gummies 💀💀

"do you have a sleep paralysis demon? are you just scared to sleep?"

"I just cannot sleep, I just toss and turn all night, I swear to god"

one of those people to do endless amounts of research to try and help

"do you wanna go to the doctor and get a prescription or something? maybe it'll help"

tweeting/posting about dumb shit you do at night

"y/n made a whole loaf of bread overnight someone send help"

"tell me why I woke up this morning to my partner staring into my soul holy shit"

FREDDIE BADLINU

also feels rlly bad that he can't help you

also brings you cherries, bananas and milk for natural melatonin in hopes it'll help a bit

will genuinley take you to a doctor to get you a prescription or something

also tweets about the shit you do while he's asleep overnight

"guys y/n picked up crocheting overnight wth"

"love when my partner wakes me up at 5am for breakfast because it was going cold 🥰 (they started cooking at 3:30am)

he can't stay up too late most days, he's a busy man

he feels so bad if you're sleeping through the whole day, he barely ever wakes you up bc he knows you're tired

"love, go back to sleep, you were up all night, I'll call you in sick, don't worry about it"

he strays away from od jokes when you're taking melatonin gummies/pills but sometimes he just has to say it

if you have a sleep paralysis demon as well, yk damn well he'll find his way into your dreams and beat the bitch up

if you can't sleep but he can, he'll just hold you and hope that you'll sleep soon

you'll usually sit there and play with his hair and admire him til you gotta get up and do something

NIKI NIHACHU

like ranboo, she puts in endless research of just trying to find things that might help you

she feels so bad

especially when you're sleeping all through the day and feel groggy as hell 24/7

if you have a paralysis demon she always reassures you that she'll beat it up for you next time it comes around

anything to make you smile bro

she's so sweet about it, if you're sleeping she makes sure to keep it quiet because this is one of the rare chances when you're sleeping

if you go multiple days without sleep and start tweaking out, she'll comfort you to sleep, doesn't matter how long it'll take

"It's okay, honey. it's okay, just focus on the rain sounds outside"

dedicated a whole kinda calm music playlist to help you sleep/relax yourself

finds it so funny when you do shit during the night to try and entertain yourself and it's the most random shit

like you'll go out and feed stray cats, accidently steal a shopping cart, fight the air and record it, etc

sleepy on stream hugs >>>

"well good morning, sunshine. its seven pm"

ALEX QUACKITY

"bro how do you not sleep"

if you got a sleep paralysis demon.... oh it's over for that mf

tweets about the dumb exhausted shit you do

"how do I turn y/n off at bedtime? I'm tired of waking up to see them staring into my soul"

"I love waking up to breakfast (I've been woken up at 4am for the past 2 weeks help me rn)"

thinks it's funny and sad at the same time when you start tweaking after not sleeping

"bro, go to sleep, cmon, it's okay, you're fine" as he's trying not to laugh at you

literally stuffs you with melatonin around 7:30 to see if it'll help LMAO

even talks on stream about how he's gonna fight the demons and pretends whoever he's fighting w is one LMAO

loves when you walk into stream all groggy and tired because he can finally spend a little time w you

[emeritusemeritus]

if you’re taking requests can you do fred x artist!reader maybe? it’s okay if not though! (:

Hi love! Let me start by saying I’m sorry that this completely took on a life of its own. I started writing and I couldn’t stop, too engrossed in the story. I wasn’t sure what kind of art you wanted to include so I made the reader a painter/ designer and an all round creative. I’ve sobbed writing this and I’ve even had to split it into two parts because I’ve fallen down a hole and written over 8 thousand words, not joking.

I hope you enjoy! I shall now go and rest 😂🖤

Part 2 will be posted HERE once it is uploaded.

Warnings: ANGST. Sadness, breakups, illusions to cheating, breakup references. Happy ending I promise! Talks of marriage, proposals, Hagrid and his creatures, Fang being the goodest boy. Lots of tears and sadness but it gets better! Not beta read nor spellchecked, apologies for any mistakes. Timeline is a little wonky (picturing it OOTP just before the twins departure but there’s no war/no Umbridge)

Word count: 4.9k [Part 1&2= 8.2k] 😬

The Artist and the Entrepreneur part 1

You walked into your dorm in an exhausted slump, trying desperately not to sigh too loudly of our sheer exhaustion in order to not wake your dorm mates. It was nearly 11:30pm by the time you had made it back to the dorms, having to wake and then calm down the fat lady who was not willing to listen to your explanation of why you were out so late. You needed to bathe and get to sleep, ready for classes the next morning but you could barely function, trying desperately to summon the energy to undress and make your way to the bathrooms. It was a necessary evil but it had to be done and so you dragged your near-lifeless body to the bathroom and began running a bath, which thankfully filled up quickly with almost perfect temperature water. You grimaced as you peeled the uniform away from your body, wincing at a particularly nasty wound on your right forearm which you would attempt to heal after you'd bathed. Your hands were covered in paint, mud and whatever else had made their way under your nails, arms littered with paint splatters and other vague marks.

Sinking down into the water, you forced yourself to stay awake feeling suddenly soothed by the warm water, both physically and mentally. It had been a hard couple of weeks, stretched beyond your means as your timetable suddenly doubled. You were tired, exhausted and still there was another week to go of this madness, but it would all worth it on the end.

You dried quickly, assisting yourself with a flick of your wand and dressed into your pyjamas, hardly managing to scoop up your dirty uniform on your way back to bed.

5am came much quicker than you'd have liked. It was almost as if you'd closed your eyes and opened them again only a minute later. You crawled out of bed trying again to stay silent and reached for the clean set of uniform and robes on the chair beside your bed, kicking the lump of dirty uniform under your bed to deal with later. You slipped into the bathrooms to dress so that you wouldn't wake anyone and slipped down to the common room, pray in that you didn't see anyone on the way. You cast a glance at the boys dormitory staircase and felt a stab of sorrow thinking of Fred and how you'd barely seen him in the past two weeks. You were often gone before breakfast and not back until well past curfew, not that either of the twins ever abided by the rules.

"Oh shush," you said to the fat lady who had begun her usual spiel of sounding the alarm due to you being out of bed out of hours, not listening nor remembering the speech you'd given everyday for the past two weeks as you attempted to sneak out. You couldn't afford to be discovered by the prefects nor any teachers roaming the corridors, as above board as your mission was- you couldn't risk Fred finding out what you were doing.

Sunlight shone through the windows as you made your way around the castle, holding back a shiver at the coldness of the castle in the late March morning, your robes doing very little to shield you from the chill. You crept out of the castle and marvelled at the beautiful first rays of daylight peaking through the trees of the forbidden forest. You looked ahead and saw that smoke was billowing from the chimney of Hagrid's hut, the only sign of life against the otherwise serene backdrop of the forbidden forest. You made your way slowly, enjoying the peaceful walk down to the hut, hoping that Hagrid had put the kettle on in anticipation of your arrival.

"Morning y/n!" Hagrid says with a wide smile, bustling around in the small hut, much too awake for this time in the morning. Fang in stark contrast lay slumped in his bed and half asleep, continuously disturbed by Hagrid's banging. A steaming cup of tea lay waiting for you on the table and you thank him graciously, taking a soothing sip of the hot liquid. You look at the clock on the wall beside the window as see that it's nearly half 5 now, the sun rising in the sky and greeting an almost ethereal light across the magnificent castle, a sight that still amazed you even seven years later.

"Beautiful isn't it?" Hagrid asks, noticing you gazing up at the castle and you share a smile for a moment, the tiredness having faded now thanks to the alarmingly strong cup of tea that you'd now become accustomed to.

"Ready to get to work now?" He asks, watching you drain the last of the tea from the large mug. You try to hide your disappointment from being dragged out once again to the edge of the forest, knowing that you'd signed up for this. You nod with a smile, navigating around the large table as you move towards to door behind Hagrid. You shoot a look towards Fang, wanting to give him a parting stroke but you notice quickly that he's fallen back to sleep and so you leave him alone to snooze, wishing that you could too.

It was nearly half 8 when you walked into the great hall, taking a brief detour to the bathrooms as you washed your hands and to hide any evidence of your morning. Your early start was already catching up to you and you hid a yawn behind the sleeve of your robe as you walked through the doors of the great hall. You checked your robe one last time for any signs of evidence but thankfully you were clear, noticing only a moment later when you took you'll place at the table that there was a great dollop of pint upon your shoe.

"Here she is," George says from across the table, nodding his head towards you as you climbed onto the bench beside Ron in the gap between him and Neville.

"Switch with Y/n Ronald," Fred says from beside him without a hint of a please. Knowing he won't get any manners out of his older brother, Ron complies and shifts up to allow you to sit beside your boyfriend.

"Thanks Ron," you say, trying to hold off the yawn that was threatening to break free at any moment.

"Morning beautiful, you're late," Fred says, his hand slipping across your back as you pour yourself a large glass of pumpkin juice. He frowns at the coldness of your robes beneath his fingers but doesn't say anything. "You overlay again?"

"Yeah," you lie, feeling immediately guilty about the fact. "Snape's set us a load of work, took me ages to figure it out last night. Didn't get a lot of sleep." As if to prove your point, the yawn you'd been suppressing finally escapes with so much force that it makes your eyes water.

You manage to force down some toast, staying quiet as the conversation continues around you. The first bell rings and you barely hold back a sigh, detesting the fact that you'd have to get up again.

"I can walk you to potions?" Fred says, holding his hand out to help you off the bench. You're quick to conceal the paint on your shoe and if he notices, he doesn't say anything.

"And have you late for charms again?" You counter, raising an eyebrow at your boyfriend who just shrugs completely unfazed.

"Haven't seen you much lately, thought you'd been avoiding me."

His words feel like a stab directly to your heart, knowing that you were guilty of avoiding him, though it wasn't in a negative way. Your craved the time with him, of mischief in the late hours and spontaneous moments in hidden corridors and empty classrooms.

"I promise I'm not," you say with a smile, trying to vanquish his idea completely as you lean up to press a kiss to his full lips. His arms immediately grab your waist as he pulls you in for a deeper kiss that borders on inappropriate but you relent, unable to resist after not seeing him properly for so long.

"So, potions?" Fred smirks, pulling away. You chuckle, placing your hands on his chest.

"For me? Yes. For you? No, get to charms," you order playfully, leaning up to give him one last peck on the lips before turning away. "See you at lunch!"

You can hear his boyish chuckle as you walk away down the corridor in the opposite direction of him, praying that he would be entirely too focused on the swishing of your behind and that the paint on your shoe would go entirely unseen.

By lunch you were completely exhausted, too tired to even notice the suspicious side-eyes from the identical twins as they watched you poke around at your food and down a second cup of very strong tea, having outwardly complained that the first one was too weak. Uncharacteristically for them, they said nothing and continued to chatter amongst themselves, keeping the conversation open for you though you didn't give much imput.

"Fancy the black lake tonight, after hours?" Fred whispers in your ear, knowing even without looking that a smirk would be tugging at his lips. You inwardly grimaced, cursing your ridiculous secret plan as you wished more than anything that you could join him. You were running out of excuses now, finding it hard to keep track with what you'd already lied about.

"I can't tonight, got an essay for snape in the morning I've still not finished," you say with a guilty expression, almost wincing as the words too-effortlessly tumble out of your mouth. "Friday night I promise?"

He seems put out almost instantly, never one to be able to conceal his emotions well. He looks frustrated, confused and rejected within seconds of each other and gives a halfhearted nod at your counter offer of Friday instead.

The bell rings signalling the end of lunch and you hope for a kiss before parting but lose all hope when you feel his lips briefly brush your hairline and he runs off to catch up with George and Angelina.

You avoided the common room after classes, choosing instead to sneak down to Hagrid's a little early, thankful for Thursday evening Quidditch practice which meant that you wouldn't cross paths with Fred.

"Y/n, I'm nipping out tomorrow on dumbledores orders, think you could nip down and check in everything while I'm gone?" Hagrid says as you out dutifully complete your given task, hoping to get it done quickly so you could try and salvage a bit of time tonight for Fred. His questions throws you off for long enough that you feel a hot gust of fire breezing past your right ear, followed by a burning sensation in the same spot. He's quick to act and gets you out of harms way before any more damage is done whilst you remain slightly frozen in both fear and contemplation. You knew you couldn't say no, in debt to his generosity and so you simply nodded, already dreading the implications of your acceptance.

It's late once again when you arrive at the common room, only half an hour til curfew, and despite your attempts at hiding your tiredness and attempting to appear happy and neutral, you can't help but feel the guilt swirling in your gut when you see Fred and George pedalling their products to the younger students with wide smiles on their faces and still dressed in their quidditch uniforms. You sneak up to Fred once he's done with a sale and slip behind him, placing your hand on his shoulder to alert him to your presence. 

Only, when he turns around his smile slowly fades upon realisation that it's you and your heart immediately begins to break, knowing that it was the other way round. He doesn't instantly reach out for you with his big grabby hands like usual nor does he attempt to kiss you. You try and salvage the situation, putting more effort in, trying to be as normal as possible but he seems to see right through the act.

"Wanna sneak out? I hear the black lake is beautiful this time of night." You say with a smirk, trying desperately to mask your tiredness and to hold it together. He doesn't jump at the chance as you hoped and instead casts a cursory glance to George before turning back to you.

"Can't tonight, got to restock the snack boxes with George," he says, briefly touching your hand before a third year calls his name, hand outstretched ready to buy one of his creations. Your stomach sinks, knowing that it's a lie and the irony of the situation only seems to hurt you more as you feel your eyes well up with fresh tears. You excuse yourself immediately, not even greeting your friends who you can tell are watching the tense exchange and you hope more than anything that no one follows you. You're completely depleted with exhaustion, running on hardly any sleep and completely overworked by your own doing. Suddenly the outcome didn't seem worth it and you regretted ever starting, finding your idea foolish.

You let your tears flow as you shower, passively washing away the fresh marks from the day off your arms, the clear gel and the colourful spatters draining away down the plug hole with your tears. You wince in pain when the water falls directly onto the freshly wounded skin behind your ear and your neck, execrating yourself for missing that spot despite Hagrid's warnings.

Too tired and upset to face going back down to the common room, you give up and reward yourself with an early night, though you feel anything but rewarded.

5am came around once more and more than ever you begrudgingly pulled yourself from the warm bed and slipped into the bathroom, the reminder of Fred's rejection playing on your mind from the second your eyes opened. Had you dreamt about it? Either way his reaction was firmly imprinted on your mind and you couldn't get away from how desperately painful it was to have him reject you like that. You slipped out of the common room on autopilot, closing the door with a little too much force already anticipating the fat lady's usual ranting and slumped off towards Hagrid's hut. The skies looked as sombre and sorrowful as you felt, covering the sky in a dull grey hue that seemed to dull the normally beautiful sunrise. You were quiet this morning, not rude or impolite but simply quiet as you worked alongside Hagrid, consumed by your foreboding thoughts knowing that you would still have to cancel Fred tonight, if he even cared anymore.

Once your morning jobs were complete, you decline any further invite to stay and decide instead to sneak back into the castle for breakfast, hoping you could join your friends and boyfriend like usual. Breakfast had only just begun when you walked into the great hall, having made your usual stop off at the girls bathrooms on the way and you're not surprised when the only person sat at the table is Hermione who's already got her head down in a book. She lifts her head up to greet you happily as you sit opposite her at the table, beginning to place her bookmark on the page she's on but you tell her not to, to enjoy the peace whilst she can. She shoots you a grateful smile and you sit enjoying your second cup of tea in peace, thankful you could make this happen today. You knew it was at the expense of your other jobs and you'd most certainly pay for it in the long run but having half of the morning to reset still felt good.

"Morning," Angelina says as a sits down at the table next to Hermione who this time only says a passive greeting, much too engrossed in her book. Angelina reached immediately for a glass of pumpkin juice before rubbing her eyes and yawning at the early hour.

"Not been sleeping well?" You ask with relative concern for your friend, watching her yawn for a second time within seconds. "Staying up late trying to find a loophole in quidditch rules again?" You joke with a smile, watching as she shoots you a mock glare even though it was most probably true, only to be interrupted by her third yawn.

"I wish! Still never finished reading that rule book," she snorts. "I know there's something there I've missed." She takes a sip of her pumpkin juice and you watch as she swallows down another yawn. "I was at the black lake with the twins last night, didn't get back til late."

It's amazing that you don't choke on your own pumpkin juice as the words glide out of her mouth, your stomach sinking like a stone at the implications. You knew Angelina and there was no malice nor hidden meaning behind her words but it still stings more than getting caught in the path of a Ukrainian Ironbelly. Fred had openly lied to you, had rejected you and had invited Angelina in your place. You're frozen in place by the revelation but Angelina doesn't notice, now heartily tucking into her breakfast, though you do notice hermione peeking over her book to look at you. Tears begin to prickle your eyes as the sinking feeling in your gut consumes you, your thoughts spiralling out of control. He didn't want you anymore, you'd pushed him too far to come back from, all with him in mind.

You barely noticed when Ron, Ginny and Harry appeared at the table but you noticed immediately when you heard two very familiar voices echoing as Fred and George walked into the great hall. You had to leave, you had to get out before then took their places. A part of you, wether it was self-punishment or morbid curiosity wanted to stay and see if Fred would chose to sit next to you, to see if he'd interact with you or be cold and distant but you couldn't do it, knowing that the latter would kill you. You stood up so quickly that you bumped your knee on the bottom of the table with a resounding thud that seemed to draw everyone's attention to you but you didn't stick around to shrivel under their curious gazes. There was no way you could avoid Fred now as he made his way to the table but you couldn't do anything about that. Placing your hand over your mouth, you feigned queasiness and ran out of the hall, straight past Fred and George.

Climbing up the spiralling staircase from potions, your stomach sank when you saw a familiar form resting against one of the pillars in the corridor, his shining red hair leaving no doubt as to who it was. You waited for your fellow classmates to disperse, signalling for Alicia to go ahead with the others, leaving you and Fred alone. You half hoped for the first time ever that you'd gotten the twins mixed up

And that it was actually George that was waiting for you but as you walked over with a faux smile on your face, there was no doubt in your mind that it was Fred.

"Hi," you said, sounding awkward even to your own ears. He gives you a look, apparently having noticed your unusually formal greeting too and reaches out for you as if nothing was wrong. His touch feels wrong, the lies feeling like an impenetrable barrier between you and you don't sink into his touch as you usually did, nor do you make any attempt to reach out for him in return.

"Still want to go to the black lake tonight?" He says, reaching out to play with a strand of your hair from the haphazardly thrown up ponytail. His words feel like a knife, like a taunt of what you missed out in last night. Did he know that you knew about his jaunts last night or was he planning on denying the entire thing and acting like nothing was wrong?

You couldn't bite your tongue any longer, the unyielding sleep deprivation affecting your ability to regulate your emotions and you pulled yourself back out of his reach with a venomous look in your eyes.

"Thought you'd have seen enough of it with Angelina last night,' you spit out, the quickly fading logical part of your brain hardly believing that you were having this conversation with Fred, the downfall of your relationship taking you completely by surprise as it's ungodly pace. He blanches, face flushing pale as his ears turn more and more pink upon hearing your words. His eyes widen momentarily and the sickness in your gut increases as you note how panicked he looks, your fears confirmed that he was intending on not telling you anything.

"Princess," he says, trying to bounce back from his momentary shock as he reaches out for you but you avoid his hand entirely, blocking him by slightly turning your body to the right, away from him.

"My name is y/n," you counter, uncaring for his term of endearment. His brown creases but in a flash it's gone, his gaze now focused on your ear. You watch as his eyes harden, no longer looking guilty as his eyes set into a hard stare that grazes across your face until he finally looks into your eyes, somehow in competition with you for how angry you can gaze at eachother.

"It's not my whereabouts that need questioning though is it?" He says through partially gritted teeth, unrelenting eyes staring into your soul.

"What are you talking about?" You counter, trying desperately to hold onto your anger but it's quickly draining from you under his suspicious scrutiny.

"Seems you forgot to hide that one," he spits, pointing to the mark behind your ear. Your gaze softens immediately as you realise what he's pointing to- the pink mark on your neck. In your haste to not set your hair on fire in potions, you'd quickly tied up your hair and had completely forgotten that the mark on your neck would now be visible.

"Fred," you say, the tables turning on you now as you cower under his powerful gaze.

"Thought it was odd that you kept disappearing," he says with a grumble, his voice sounding so cold and distant that you barely recognise it. "Who is he?"

"What?" You ask suddenly, quietly, completely floored by his accusation, your mouth agape as you look upon the heated gaze of your boyfriend, though you quickly realise it may be the last time you can call him that. Never had you thought that he would have accused you of cheating. Finding out your secret maybe but this? Never.

"You heard me, who is it? Bet it's Towler isn't it," he sneers, almost spitting as he says Kenneth Towler's name to taunt you. "Reckon he's long overdue for a second dose of bulbadox powder."

You're frozen in disbelief at the furthering accusations he's spouting, his mind already wandering back to Kenneth Towler who's skin had erupted into boils during your fifth year thanks to Fred putting Bulbadox powder in his pyjamas when he'd come on to you a bit too strongly during a mid-season Quidditch game. Fred had been so distracted upon seeing Towler attempt to drape his arm around you that it caused him to miss an oncoming bludger that caught the tail end of Wood's broom, throwing him off balance and equating in a deciding goal that had given Ravenclaw the lead, that then resulted in their victory over Gryffindor. Fred had been furious, not at you naturally but at Towler who he'd declared had lost them the whole game and had vowed a form of revenge by adding the bulbadox.

"It is isn't it?" He prods, taking your silence as confirmation.

"No!" You say with vengeance, wanting to shoot down that accusation straight away. "There's no one," you add. He huffs out a humourless laugh that makes your entire body fill with dread.

"Well someone's giving you those marks and it's certainly not me!" He argues, "haven't let me anywhere near you for weeks, which is funny because you're usually up for it whenever."

Your blood runs cold at his words and you resist the instinctual urge to slap him right across his stupid face. It's like the four years of your relationship have been nothing to him; pulled apart and mocked by one single comment that now made you question everything. Was that all it was to him? Were you just easy and available? You felt physically sick by the thought and you were certain that nothing had ever hurt you so deeply before. The boy you'd fallen so helplessly in love for, the one with the fire red hair and the cheeky grin that only ever seemed to have eyes for you had changed so quickly right before your eyes. The very boy that had supported all of your creative dreams, encouraging you to keep painting and keep creating even when you doubted yourself or lacked inspiration. Merlin, most of the time he was your inspiration.

You realise that there's nothing left to say, that any further attempt to defend yourself will only fall on deaf ears and by his last comment, you weren't sure it was worth trying to salvage the joke that had been your relationship. You thought of the secret you'd be hiding, of the real reason you had been sneaking away and lying to him, so far away from his assumption that it was almost laughable- but now completely void of any importance. There was no coming back from this. What you assumed to have been love for the past four years had completely disappeared from his eyes and you knew from this moment onwards that all you would ever see when he gazed upon you would be pure disdain.

It feels like every bone is breaking in your body simultaneously as you walk away, like your heart is directly under the cruciatus curse with the sheer volume of anguish within your body. You've never felt pain like it, completely unable to distinguish exactly where it hurts or why. You let vision is blurred and your body physically hurts, your ears ringing from the screams of pain that resonate around your head but are trapped inside your mind. You don't look at Fred, you can't, nor can you bear to listen for him calling out to you as you walk away, the last glimmer of hope gone. 

You consider returning to your dorm and locking yourself away for the foreseeable future, skipping all of your classes and sobbing until you can't anymore as you body screams for you to do but you can't. You can't let anyone see you like that, nor would you be able to answer anyone's questions or deal with their stares. And so, you run to the one place you knew you'd be safe.

Fang greets you enthusiastically the second you push through the door to the empty hut and collapse against the door with a roaring cry. The anguish in your cries is one that you'd never heard emitted from yourself or any other human and you no longer fight back the floods of tears that fall down your face like an unstoppable river that had broken the dam. Fang, sensing your distress, walks over to you and calmly sits beside you, placing his huge head in your lap as you cry. You hold on to the lovable boarhound like an oversized teddy bear as the tears flow, uncaring about the inevitable puddle of drool that he'll leave in your lap, the comfort of the sweet dog more needed than ever.

You don't know how long you sit there crying with your pal by your side for every moment but eventually the tears begin to slow, your breath finally evening out though your heart still pounds, much like your head. Fang lifts his head slightly, his big eyes peering into yours and you give him a thankful smile through the tears, even if he doesn't know exactly what you're trying to convey. He gives your arm a little nudge and in your near delusional state, you assume that it's a reply to your thankfulness. You chuckle, giving him a good scratch of appreciation on his wrinkled forehead at the absurdity of the situation, but you'd be forever thankful that of all things, Fang was the only one that had held you together in your darkest moment.

[spidernuggets]

Can I request #15 from the lyric list with Jason Todd please? I think it's perfect for angst or hurt/comfort, whatever you want to write really

Jason Todd x Reader

Warning: Slightly suggestive if you squint

"You with the dark curls, you with the water colour eyes"

"Jesus Christ, how do you expect me not to get upset over something like this, Jason! You're never home anymore! We don't go on dates anymore! Your.. Your friends and family don't even know we're dating!" You yell at him, tears already cascading down your face.

Jason sighs in frustration. It was late in the afternoon when Jason woke up since he was out late on patrol last night. He knew what he was getting into when he started dating you. Dark secrets, little communication. It was selfish of him, but he couldn't help it. The selfish itch in his heart dragged him towards you, not wanting to share you with anyone else.

And together with his other ego of Red Hood, he was out late at night, coming home to you in the early hours of 5am, sleeping in until around 3pm, in which he either has to go to Wayne Manor for training, or go out with Roy for a side mission.

He promised himself not to tell you about his secret life. The less you knew, the safer. Villains wouldn't give to use you as blackmail or kidnap you or hurt you. If any of them did, he wouldn't hesitate to go against Batman's morals and put a bullet through their head, no matter how long it took him to make amends with his adoptive father.

Jason sighed in frustration, pulling his hair back with a firm grip. "They don't need to know!" He says back, slightly raising his voice in attempts to remain as calm as possible. "It's none of their business!"

"How?! Am I not someone you care about?!"

"Of course you are! But they don't need to know that!"

"Why not?!"

"Because I don't want them to!" Jason yells.

You stayed quiet after that. He doesn't want them to know about you? Why?? Was he really ashamed to be dating you? Why the fuck would he date you in the first place then?

Jason's eyes widen. He didn't mean to say it. Not like that, to say the least. He didn't want his friends or family to overwhelm you. He didn't want them to be a variable in what could happen if you'd find out about his other life. And even if you didn't, he especially didn't want the press to be involved when they found out another one of Bruce Wayne's sons has found a lover.

"Doll, I-"

You put your hand out as Jason stepped closer. You spit out a harsh, sarcastic laugh as you dried your tear-stained cheeks. "You know, I thought you wanted to keep this relationship on the down low because I know how much you hate how nosy your family is. But, you know, you could've just said that dating me was that embarrassing. I would've been out of your hair ages ago if you were that ashamed to be seen with me," you snip. You start to walk to your shared bedroom, grabbing your duffel and shoving random clothes into it.

Jason felt paralysed. He couldn't move, and his heart was beating rapidly inside his head. It hurt so much. He just wanted to protect you. He just wanted to keep you safe.

When he was finally abke to manoeuvre his limbs, he rushed towards the bedroom. His head felt like it was about to explode when he saw you zipping up your duffel and throwing it over your shoulder.

"Y/n, please! I didn't-" He tried to call out to you. He tried to reason with you.

"I'll come back for the rest of my stuff next week," you mumble as you walk right past him, refusing to make eye contact with him.

Jason's heart shattered into a million pieces. His mind stopped functioning, and he went into another one of his melancholic episodes. He caved away in your used-to-be shared bedroom for the majority of that week. He clutched your pillow ever so close to him, hoping he was delusional enough to believe it was you. But it wasn't the same. He tried to think of many ways to make it up to you, to grow a pair and try to talk things out. But he's never seen you look so upset.

He wanted to fill his own head with lead. He promised himself never to let you get hurt, and he promised that if anyone did hurt you, he'd kill them. But he was the one who hurt you. And he wanted someone to put him out of his misery.

Bruce then called Jasin near the end of the week, telling him that he had missed too many important missions already and that he needed to get back in the field. Bruce was pissed. But Jason ignored him, as usual.

So, Bruce had no choice but to bring out the big guns. He ordered Alfred to demand Jason to get back to work. Alfred didn't demand, obviously. He just gently laid out that the team couldn't afford any more rest days from Jason, so they all needed Red Hood to get his head in the game. And Jason could never say no to Alfred.

So he put the big, red helmet back on and went out for crime-fighting. Granted, his skills were lacking more than usual, but Dick held Bruce back from making a scene. Dick was the only person to know of yours and Jason's past relationship, and he knew Jason would've been more appreciative and comfortable if he didn't mention it to the others. He eventually found out early in the week that you broke up with Jason and moved out of his apartment, so he understood why he was falling behind on the current mission.

There were a bunch of men who worked for Black Mask roaming the streets. Some were easily tied up already, and some were more skilled than others as there were bullets flying left and right.

Unfortunately, during the same time, you decided it would be a good time to head back to Jason's apartment to grab the rest of your belongings and the Black Man vs. Bats' encounter just so happened to take place on the route.

You were checking your phone and foolishly had your headphones on, too. It wasn't until you were at a witness distance away from the scene and heard a gunshot being fired.

From natural reaction, you screamed. You were at quite far distance, but ome of the men heard you. He called over two other guys with him. They couldn't afford to have a civilian witness.

Just when one was about to throw a knife at you, Red Hood comes swinging in, knocking him out. He disarmed the weapons of the other two, headbutting one, leaving him unconscious, and shot the other in the leg, as if he didn't have any problem fighting two seconds ago.

Your breathing was heavy and you couldn't move from where you were standing.

Red Hood came closer to you, grasping your shoulders, looking around for any wounds or bruises.

"Are you okay??" He asked in complete worry. You knew Red Hood cared about victims and innocent civilians, but he seemed real comfortable right now, but you decided to brush it off.

"Yeah... I think I'm- Watch out!" You tried to warn. The guy who was shot in the leg was able to get up and take a swing at Red Hood's head with a stray metal pole he found near him. Luckily, Red Hood was able to kick the pole out of the man's hand and punch him until he was out cold.

"Shit," Red Hood hisses. He didn't even realise his helmet cracked open until he turned around to check up on you again.

He was about to ask if you were okay again until he realised the shocked expression on your face. The right side of his mask was busted open, showing the pale colour of his green eyes and a few stray strands of dark locks sticking out.

You know those features. You know them so well.

Suddenly, you were back in your shared apartment with Jason, watching 'The Dead Poets Society' during a Saturday afternoon. He was being cradled in your arms, his head laying on your chest, and every few minutes, he would look up at you with those beautiful eyes, smiling and telling you how much he loves you, while your hand intertwined with the curls of his hair.

Suddenly, you were back in your shared kitchen, Jason huddled in the corner, arms wrapped around his knees as his head was buried within his arms. He was having another panic attack, and you slowly approached him, whispering multiple times that it was just you. It was just you and him, and it will always just be you and him. That's when he let you hold him. Your nose was nuzzled into the crown of his head, his hair tickling your neck. And he looked at you with watering eyes, apologising for putting up with him, but you just shushed him, assuring that you're never putting up with him, and that it was just another way of showing that you adore and love him with your whole heart.

Suddenly, you were back on your shared bed with the sheets tossed on the floor. Your hands were at a firm grip, pulling and tugging on Jason's hair as he made sure to keep reminding you to maintain eye contact with him the whole time while his face was settled comfortably between your thighs.

"Jason?"

"Fuck.. You.. You weren't supposed to-" Jason got a report on his comms that the rest of Black Masks' men have been taken out and GCPD will be arriving soon.

"C'mon, let's get you home," Jason mumbles, leading you towards his bike.

"We're going back to your place, Jason," you say behind him, making him stop and turn around to face you. "We're going back to your place, and you're going to tell me everything. You owe me," it wasn't a plead or a beg. It was a demand.

And Jason knew he couldn't be selfish anymore. And he also wanted you back. Back in his apartment, making it your own, too. He wanted you back in his arms. He wanted to be back in your arms. So he nods, taking you to his bike and driving back to his apartment.

He sits you down, asking you once more if you want to know everything in which you just gave him a deadpanned look.

You knew that Jason Todd went missing in some unknown accident. But that was 'Jason Todd', not Robin. So Jason tells you that there was more to his fake death, and you nod giving him the go ahead.

And with that, Jason tells you his story. From him stealing the Batmobile's tires to becoming Robin to getting killed by the Joker to come back to life by the Lazarus Pit, up until this very moment.

You didn't know how to react. You sat there on the couch staring into his eyes. Jason looks away, not wanting to see the look on your face once you've comprehended what he had finally admitted to.

"You've been through so much. And you didn't tell me. Is this why you get those panic attacks? I could've... I could've done more," you mutter. But Jason's eyes widen as he shakes his head, getting on his knees in front of you.

"No. No, Y/n. That isn't your responsibility," he says.

You look at him, annoyed. "My responsibility is to love you, Jason! And being there for you is part of loving you. You could've.. you could've at least told me small parts of your story. You could've told me you were Red Hood, and that would be end of story. I'd still love you.."

He shakes his head once more. "If you knew, you wouldn't be safe. Your safety probably decreased right now, now that you know who I am," he says, almost in a whine. "I just wanted to protect you. Of course, I'd never be embarrassed or ashamed to be seen with you. If I had it my way, if I just lived a normal life, I'd be showing you off to anyone looking our way," he confesses, and you couldn't help but smile.

You hold Jason's face in your hands, holding it so carefully, as if his face was the most delicate thing in the world. "Jay, I know you. I know you can protect me, and your family can protect us. You're so strong. I just know that no harm can come our way," you try to reassure him. He nods in response.

You place a lingering kiss on the crown of his head. "I'll be bringing my stuff back here tomorrow. No more secrets, please, hm?"

"Mhm," he nods. He's tired. And he just wants to be back with you. And you give that to him.

Suddenly, you're back in your shared bedroom on your bed. Your limbs are tangled with Jason's. Your noses are in close proximity. Your eyes are staring back at each other. And your fingers are caressing each strand of hair on his pretty head.

[heartcal]

overflow; c.h.

summary: calum breaks up with you over text instead of talking things out, but you're not settling for that. pairing: calum hood x gn!reader word count: 1,055 words warnings: mentions of stress, arguing, probably some swears (as usual), angst :^) (but some comfort), largely unedited + not proofread (written around 5am pls forgive me)

a/n: hi :^)) this is a lil piece i wrote after spending an entire day fixing my old laptop (that has been "dead" for 5 years) -- i used this laptop to write A LOT back then. since i have it working again, i had the motivation to write so i wanted to write and this is what came out :^) not for rejected (sorry :^( it's coming though!) but it's something! this was more like a writing exercise to get me back into things, so enjoy!

masterlist!

“I told you,” Calum scoffs, gripping the door handle to stop himself from shutting it in your face, “we’re done.” 

You shake your head, “Over text? Really?” 

He shrugs in response, eyes shifting behind you on a car passing by. He’s doing what he can to avoid any more direct eye contact. 

The everyday stress weighed on him, you note, as the dark circles under his eyes make any indication. There’s a slight redness surrounding his eyes and he’s blinking slower than normal. His shoulders are slumped, and you can hear it in his voice. He’s exhausted. 

You push past him and into the house – a home you once felt comfortable in – and it isn’t a welcome sight. Papers crumbled up and strewn around the living room, and various beverages in both cans and bottles littered the coffee table along with the end tables. Ash trays with countless cigarettes, used tissues, a slight musty odor tickled your nose with every other inhale. 

“What the hell, Calum?” You turn back to him, still standing by the now closed door, still avoiding your eyes. 

You sigh, your gaze shifting back to the mess in disbelief. 

You knew the stress was getting to him, and despite your best efforts to comfort him, it wore him down. The requests for him to take it easy, to take a break, to go for a walk with you to help clear his head; pointless, stupid, not helpful. His responses were pitiful, then they were disappointing, and eventually, maddening.  

You couldn’t take the pity party anymore. You wanted to be a good partner and be there for him but it was hard when he constantly pushed away any of your support. You didn’t want to watch Calum self-destruct when you were there to offer a shoulder to lean on. 

It started with a few snarky remarks here and there, originally going unnoticed by him (at least you believe they did, since he made no noise of acknowledgment). Then it evolved into quick albeit small retorts, which would then lead to you giving a few of your own.  

Was it petty? Absolutely, you’ll admit, and so did all your friends when you showed up to one of the latest get-togethers. They offered words of encouragement with their criticism of the situation. It’s just a small bump in the road, one said, patting your back gently, you both will get over it. 

Except neither of you did. The small bump devolved into a pothole, and your relationship went south. 

One snarky remark, then another, then another, and then another until it became name-calling and playground insults. The weight of everything poured over and you said something you didn’t mean. 

You were tired, too. You had your issues going on and he had known, and it was the fact that he was in his own world, too busy to notice you slipping like he was. 

It came to a head a week ago. Both of you spitting vitriol towards each other, too engrossed in trying to hurt the other to notice the look of heartbreak.  

“You know what? I’m done,” you breathe out, hands up in exasperation. 

Calum doesn’t say anything, rolling his eyes whilst nodding, shoving his hands into his pockets. 

You left the house that day, opting to stay with your friend hoping to clear your head in preparation for The Talk. But the days passed, and you received a text from Calum the night before. 

I can’t do this anymore. We’re done. 

It was stupid, you thought, to break things off over text. Childish, even, and you wanted to tell him that to his face. 

So the next day, you made your way over with a full speech ready to go. He was going to listen to you for the first time in a while whether he liked it or not. 

But the speech and any witty jabs were gone when you arrived, and upon walking into the house you were in just a week ago, the gravity of the situation dawned on you. 

You gulp, turning to face Calum. His eyes jumped up to look at the movement before moving down to look at his nails as he picked at the dirt underneath the fingernails. 

Your mouth opens, ready to speak, but it snaps shut as Calum’s stance changes. “Don’t.” 

“I didn’t even say anything.” 

“You were going to,” he steps away from the door, “and I know what you were going to say.” 

He knows you’re starting to pity him. He knows and he hates it. 

Your jaw clenches. You won’t get anywhere with him if he’s acting like this. You sniffle, warmth beginning to surround your eyes, “No, Calum, let me speak.” 

He inhales, ready to open his mouth to respond, but his mouth doesn’t move. 

“You’re digging yourself into this...this hole. I mean, look at this place--” your hands gesture to the living room, “--it’s a mess, Calum! This is unhealthy, physically and mentally. I’m worried about you.” 

Calum still says nothing, but his eyes finally make contact with yours. Your breath hitches, noticing the redness in his eyes has spread, unshed tears dance around his lower lids. There’s a slight tremble in his jaw, his breathing starting to pick up. 

“I’m worried about you, Calum,” you repeat, taking a hesitant step towards him, “I care about you. I just want you to talk to me, and I mean really talk to me.” 

He doesn’t move as you inch closer. He doesn’t move when you reach for his shaking hands, holding them in yours.  

His tears finally fall once you squeeze his hands, reassuring him that you’re here. 

He shakes his hands free from yours, bringing them up to wrap you in a tight hug while mumbling numerous apologies. 

Apologies for the insults, his attitude, his silence, and his behavior overall. He’s near inconsolable, hands tightening on your shirt, not caring about the tears staining it as he nuzzles his head into your neck.  

You soothe him, gently scratching his back. 

“Let’s talk, yeah?” 

He pulls away after a beat of silence, agreeing with puffy eyes, one hand still on your back. 

It’s not going to be an easy conversation, but it’s sure going to be a hell of a lot better than keeping everything in again.