#i spend too much time feeling completely alone to ever really feel in control of it

[meme-loving-stuck]

the hardest part about having an addictive personality is like. you KNOW you can try to discipline yourself or just keep facing the consequences of the bad thing until you finally steel yourself and say 'no. no more bad thing. because it makes me feel bad'

like you KNOW youre capable of doing it. everyone is. and youve done it... maybe once? twice?

but for you, that resolve to finally stop and recover is locked behind a door that everyone SWEARS has a key and you just need to discipline yourself to find it. but you have disciplined yourself and you have tried everything and your fucking door doesnt have a key. it just doesnt. so you can hardly remember a time when you got to just... say no. and unlock the door

and you know that at SOME rare points in your life you have had something so catastrophically bad happen related to the addiction (usually involving hospitalization or something equally serious) that you broke the fucking locked door down and finally stopped. so you know it CAN be open and you CAN see the other side of that door.

it's just way fucking harder when the key to yours doesnt exist.

[pedroscurls]

just the tip (one-shot)

summary: you're ready to take the next step with logan, but you're still a bit nervous. pairing: old man!logan x fem!reader content warnings: explicit smut (18+, mdni), inexperienced reader, missionary, fingering, unprotected p in v sex, creampie, logan can't control himself, implied age gap (but no mention of age), no use of y/n. word count: 3k a/n: ok, this is yet another one-shot of complete old man logan filth. it never really is just the tip, is it? 🤭 i'm just so obsessed with logan and can't figure out which version of him i want to write on most days lol. honestly, idk where this idea originated from, but here we are... i just have a fantasy of old man logan showing me the ropes ya know... anyway, hope you enjoy! 🙂‍↕️

Logan doesn’t know what he did in this life to ever deserve you. Someone so sweet, so patient, so kind, so pure. He doesn’t even know why someone like you would ever be interested in someone like him. He knows he’s no longer in his prime – his hair now a gray shade, beard overgrown with more gray than brown, crow’s feet at the corners of his eyes, wrinkles around his face. 

And you… You’re obviously much younger than him – everyone is much younger than him – but your innocence and your purity makes you seem so much younger than you really are, despite being very mature for your age. You smile so sweetly at him, gaze at him with such kind eyes that he doesn’t ever feel deserving of you. 

But you had approached him first. All shy and unlike the rest of the girls in your group the night that you both met. You seemed so out of place, like maybe you had just been dragged along for the night because you were quiet, reserved, even when you had three drinks and one shot of tequila already. 

The rest of your group was loud, outfits way too revealing that everyone had eyes on them. They craved and yearned for the attention, but you were fine with being in the background. This wasn’t usually how you spent most Friday nights, but your friends had convinced you and you owed one of them a favor. 

You weren’t the prettiest in the group and you certainly never got the attention of anyone else when you were with them, but you didn’t mind. Your friends never made you feel less than you were, always the ones to reassure you and give you the confidence that you lacked. 

And that night was no different. They had given you the confidence to approach Logan who was keen on spending just a couple of hours drinking his problems and nightmares away. Alone. 

But when you sat next to him and flashed him that sweet smile paired with those kind eyes, Logan knew he wouldn’t have the strength to turn away from you. He tried to act like he wasn’t interested, tried to act like talking to you was an inconvenience, but it never deterred you. Instead, you remained seated next to him all throughout the night even well past the time the bar was closing. 

“Your friends left you,” Logan told you. 

“That usually is the plan,” you admitted. 

His head tilted. “The plan is to go home with a stranger? Sounds dangerous if you ask me, bub.”

“I don’t usually do this.” 

“Do what?” 

“Go home with a stranger.” 

“Ain’t going home with me,” Logan whispered. “I don’t do this either. Too old for this, actually.”

Logan didn’t miss the way your face fell at his words. All night, he kept asking himself why did you pick him? What was so special about him that you decided to spend the rest of your night talking to him? 

“If I did invite you back to my apartment, would you say yes?” You asked quietly, your kind eyes now filled with hope. 

“Don’t think that’s a good idea, sweetheart.” 

Sweetheart. 

You didn’t push him, wanted to respect his decision and his boundaries. So instead, you grabbed a napkin off the bar counter and a sharpie before writing your name and phone number. “Call me?”

“Sure,” Logan lied, staring down at the napkin. 

Once outside the bar, you pulled out your phone. “Well, I better call a Lyft now. It was really great talking with you, Logan.” 

“Let me take you home at least,” he muttered. 

“Oh, you don’t have to.” 

“I’m a driver,” he chuckled lowly. “If you called a Lyft, there’s a high chance that it’d be me who takes you home anyway.” 

“Okay,” you smiled up at him and Logan felt his heart race even faster at the sight. 

And since then, you and Logan had developed a friendship that soon turned physical. Heavy make out sessions and lingering touches, but you hadn’t taken that extra step, hadn’t gone the full distance. 

–

“I think I’m ready,” you tell him, hands resting on his shoulders as you sit on his lap. 

“For?” Logan asks, head tilting as his strong hands rest on your upper thighs. 

“To have sex with you.” 

Logan clears his throat, can feel his manhood stir beneath his pants. He stares into your eyes, tries to search for any uncertainty but you look determined. You look like you’ve made up your mind. 

“Sweetheart,” he sighs. “You know I’m fine with what we’ve been doing. I don’t want to push you or make you feel like you need to do this for me. We’ll go at your pace.”

“I trust you,” you admit quietly. “I’m not… experienced like other women my age should be, but–”

“Inexperienced or not, I don’t care about that.” Logan lifts you off his lap and sets you on the couch instead, his hands immediately moving to cover the center of his pants. “We don’t have to–”

“I want this, Logan. I want you. All of you.” You bite your lower lip and move to settle on your knees on the couch, staring up at him. “I’m not a virgin, but I haven’t been with many men before.” 

Logan’s eyes narrow at you. “Oh, that so?” He isn’t sure why he feels jealous at your words, imagining other men who've had you in their bed. He’s had a taste of you, knows exactly what to do to get you to come and you’ve done the same to him. And yet, he hasn’t had you in a way these other men have. 

You nod at him, so innocent and pure written on your features. He can sense your nervousness, but he can also smell your arousal. It hits his senses all at once and his gaze darkens. “I just don’t want to disappoint you.” 

“Oh, sweetheart,” Logan smirks. “I’ve seen the way you suck my cock,” he growls. “You ain’t gonna disappoint me.” 

You feel the heat rise in your cheeks, feel the wetness begin to settle between your legs, dampening your panties at his words. You loved when he would talk dirty to you; it only excited you even more. “Y– You like that, huh?” 

Logan nods and stands up from the couch, lifting you into his arms without issue. “Of course,” he whispers, taking you to his bedroom as he walks into the room with you in his arms. “I love the fact that you like doing it too.” 

You nod in agreement. “I do love it.” 

Logan grins and sets you on his bed, watching as you prop yourself on your hands with your lower lip pulled between your teeth. And he wants so badly to respond and tell you that he loves you, but he doesn’t. Everyone that he’s ever loved was taken from him, so he doesn’t say anything. 

“I know, you’re like a crazed animal.” Logan chuckles. 

You pout up in his direction and gently reach out to tug on the waistband of his pants, pulling him to stand between your legs as your free hand moves to massage his crotch. 

“See what I mean?” He groans, hardening even further with every graze of your hand. Logan gently takes your hand from him and shakes his head, lifting you further up the bed as he climbs atop of you. “You sure about this?” 

You nod and move your hands to rest on his chest, feeling the muscle flex beneath your fingertips. “Yes,” you say almost breathlessly. “I’m just a bit nervous.” 

Logan’s gaze softens and he looks down at you. You had broken through his hard exterior, had nestled your way into his heart, and even Charles had taken notice. You make him feel young again, like not all of the world’s responsibilities are weighing heavy on his shoulders. With you, he feels free, at peace. You manage to quiet all of the voices in his head, but he’d never tell you that. 

“We’ll go at your pace,” he whispers, moving his hand down your side. 

“I’m just nervous I won’t be able to take all of you,” you admit. 

Logan chuckles and leans back on his knees to gently tug down your shorts and panties. He tosses it carelessly to the side and instantly, he smells your arousal hit his senses. He looks down at your lower half, sex glistening with your wetness. “It’ll fit,” he says lowly, hands moving up your legs. “We’ll make sure it does.” 

“Maybe just start with the tip?” you ask, grabbing the ends of your oversized t-shirt above your head. You lie back down, hair splaying on his pillows as your body is now fully exposed and on full display for him.

Logan nods, pulling off his white tank-top over his head. He stands up momentarily to push down his pants, his manhood now standing at attention and leaking at the tip. He reaches down and strokes himself once, twice, before he settles himself between your legs. 

“Gonna get you ready for me first,” Logan whispers, his large hand splaying over your abdomen as it slides down towards where you need him the most. He hovers above you, lips resting just near your ear as he slowly slides his middle finger past your folds. It slides in with ease, your slickness allowing for easy entry. Logan gently nips on your earlobe, grunting in your ear as you let out a quiet whimper at the intrusion. 

“Logan,” you moan quietly, moving a hand to rest on his large bicep, gripping it tightly. This isn’t the first time Logan’s fingered you, but the anticipation of what’s to come has you clenching around his digit unintentionally. 

“Already so wet f’me,” he whispers into your ear, slowly adding another digit into your depths. Logan ruts against the mattress, trying to find his own relief as he slowly begins to pump his fingers in and out of you. 

You turn your head and bury your face against the crook of his neck, teeth grazing against his skin. “Logan,” you whimper, gasping quietly as you feel another digit enter you. 

“That’s three already, sweetheart,” Logan growls as he thrusts his fingers in and out of you. When he feels your teeth gently bite down on his neck, he groans, thrusting his three digits inside of you as he begins to curl his fingers within your depths. “Come f’me, honey.”

“Logan, I–” you shut your eyes tightly and arch your back, your breasts pushing against his chest. Your walls tighten even further around his digits, your hips rolling upwards as you ride out your high. 

Logan smirks and pulls back slowly, looking down at you as your chest heaves up and down. He pulls his fingers from you and looks down at it, his digits glistening with your arousal. He brings it to his lips and sucks your arousal from his fingers, eyes staring into your own once your eyes open. “Ready?” 

You nod, biting your lower lip in anticipation. “Just the tip, okay?”

“Sure, sweetheart.” Logan says, leaning back on his knees as he reaches down to grasp onto the base of his manhood. He leans in closer, running his tip along the length of your sex, applying pressure to your bundle of nerves.

You look down between your legs and bite your lower lip. The sight of him holding onto the base of his length as he rubs his tip up and down the length of your sex, until his tip catches against your opening. “Logan…” you whimper, reaching out for him but he just uses his free hand to grab a hold of your wrists, pinning them above your head. 

Slowly, Logan pushes his tip into you, feeling your tight walls immediately surround him. He groans and then pulls back, running his tip once more along you. Logan’s grip around your wrists tighten, pressing them further into the mattress as he pushes his tip – and only his tip – inside of your depths. Logan looks down and slowly pushes further into you, hearing you quietly gasp as a few more inches past his tip enter you.

“Logan, wait, baby–” 

Logan growls and then suddenly slams all the way into you in one stroke. The warmth of your walls surround him, so tight and so wet as his lower half presses firmly against yours. “Fuck,” he groans, his now free hand coming up to rest on your cheek. 

You feel your toes curl at the intrusion – nothing Logan did would have ever prepared you for the size of him. You can feel every inch and vein of his length inside of you, throbbing and stretching you. It’s so much, all at once, that when he pulls back only to thrust back in all the way, it causes your eyes to flutter. 

“I said–” you moan. “Start with the tip…”

“Couldn’t help myself,” he groans, leaning down to kiss the tip of your nose. “You feel so good around me, sweetheart.” Logan feels your legs wrap around his waist, your ankles locking together at his lower back. 

You nod in agreement, tears stinging your eyes. Logan’s so deep and it’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. You keep your eyes open and trained on him. He hadn’t removed his glasses, now staring at you from the top of his glasses. You try to wiggle your hands free, but Logan’s grip just tightens even further. 

“Logan, oh god,” you moan, his slow thrusts now picking up speed. He pulls out to his tip and then slams back into you, his tip kissing your cervix with each thrust. His hand moves from your cheek to grip your hip, fingertips digging into the meat of your flesh. 

He knows that he probably won’t last any longer, the feeling of your tight walls gripping him, the way he’s easily sliding in and out of your depths due to how wet you are for him. It’s in moments like this where he doesn’t know why you still stick around, why you still continue to choose him. Logan releases your hands and grips your hips in both hands, pulling back to look down at you. Logan continues to thrust into you, the sound of his skin slapping against yours echo off the walls of his room. 

Your hands immediately move to grip his sheets and he can feel your walls begin to tremble once more, can feel you begin to tighten around his length. Logan groans, eyes moving along your frame, his gaze lingering at the sight of your breasts bouncing with each sharp thrust he delivers. He knows his grip around your hips will leave marks and the thought of you walking around, going about your day with marks of him suddenly makes him feel territorial, suddenly has this desire to make everyone know that you’re his. 

“Logan, I’m gonna–” 

“Yeah, baby,” he groans. “I know, come f’me.” 

And just on cue, your legs tighten even further around his waist as your walls tighten around his length. He can feel you shaking, can feel just a rush of wetness. “Logan!” 

He groans. He’d never get tired of hearing his name escape your lips at the height of pleasure. Logan’s hips stutter, feeling a tightness build in the pit of his stomach as he chases his own release. He releases your hips to rest his hands on the mattress near your head, slamming his hips into yours – once, twice, three times before he releases inside of you, his seed filling you. He should have asked first, should have thought about using a condom, but when he pulls out of you and watches his seed trickle out of you, the guilt disappears immediately. 

You stare up at him and then follow his gaze down between your legs, watching his spend come out of you and drop down onto his mattress, staining his sheets. “You’ll have to wash these now,” you tease, your voice almost breathless. 

“Worth it,” he whispers, leaning down and gently pecking your lips. 

“Was that– Was I okay?” you ask quietly, your hands slowly moving to his hair. 

“Oh, sweetheart,” Logan says softly. “We’re gonna be doing more of that.”

 An excitement flickers in your eyes and you grin, leaning up on your elbows to gently capture his lips with your own. “And just so we’re clear… I don’t mind that you came inside.” 

Logan pulls back and looks down at you. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” you nod. “I like knowing that I can still feel you.” 

Logan smirks and he can feel himself slowly begin to get hard again. His regenerative powers aren’t all that quick anymore, so he’s surprised that his manhood is stirring awake, yearning for you yet again. 

“Next time we do this,” you begin quietly. “Can I ride you?” 

Logan groans as he moves his hips, his tip slowly brushing against you. He slowly lies on his back and reaches down to stroke himself, eyes running across your frame. “Come on, then.” 

“Wait,” you bite your lower lip. “You’re– How?” 

“You make it easy,” he winks, reaching out to gently tap your hip. “Take what you need, sweetheart.”

You move to straddle his hips and Logan looks down to see his release trickle out of you, dripping onto the hair at his base. He stares up at you, feeling you slide down his length and he watches you tilt your head back, a moan escaping your lips. Logan bites his lower lip, hands moving to your hips as he gazes up at you. Logan knows that you’re way out of his league, that you deserve to be with someone closer to your age, but fuck – he’s going to keep you for as long as you allow. 

Because Logan knows that he’s so deep in his feelings for you that he won’t ever choose to let you go. 

And now, as you’re slowly rocking your hips, he’s going to keep this image in his mind until the day he dies. 

His girl. His.

[luvjunie]

— headcanons. what life is like for miles!42

a/n: i honestly didn’t mean for these to get so angsty oopsies!! i kept adding on so they’re also very lengthy wc: 1,751

contains: mentions of grief

Everyone thinks he’s rude and impossible to approach—but that’s a common misconception. In reality, he’s actually quite shy and simply prefers to keep to himself. His quiet nature often causes him to come off ill-mannered, which is completely unintentional on his end and partially the fault of those who assume what he’s like instead of actually getting to know him.

He used to be open to making friends and spending time with peers, but after everyone found out his dad died— which was impossible to prevent considering the man who used to drive him to school now had a giant mural made in his honor— he began receiving a ridiculous amount of pitied stares in the halls, began hearing hushed whispers about how hard things must be for him at home now. And even though they were, he hated that he was being treated differently by those he once kept close to him, like a charity case. As if he were fragile and would break— like he often did when he was alone.

His old friends were supposed to be his distraction, something to take his mind off how he now had to grow up faster than he’d liked. Something to remind him that his trauma hadn’t aged him as much as he feared; that he truly was still a kid at heart. But instead, they served as a constant reminder of the worst thing he’d ever had to live through— skated around him like he’d blow up the second they said the wrong thing; responded with heartfelt condolences instead of laughing with him whenever he’d tell a funny story about his dad. So eventually, he drifted away from them and began keeping to himself all together.

Don’t put him in a box because of his prowler side hustle, this boy is smart as hell!! Especially with one parent now being gone and his mom struggling to pay the bills? He takes his academics very seriously, he has no choice. He has to get it out the mud somehow and he doesn’t have the privilege of skipping classes as much as 1610-miles does. He’s working two years above his grade level in AP Calculus and AP physics, and has been accused of cheating on his tests a couple times due to how fast he completes them, as well as the fact that he has never once asked a question from the seat he chose in the back of the room.

It’s not something anyone would expect, but he enjoys baking a lot and he’s damn good at it too. When he was younger, he’d spent one summer with his Mamá Lena (Rio’s mother), who had him in the kitchen helping her cook and bake almost everyday and it just stuck. It’s a secret talent of his that never really comes up in conversation, and that you wouldn’t know about unless you’ve seen him doing it. His banana bread muffins using a recipe he took months to perfect taste like the gods themselves made them, and he’ll slip one into his mom’s work lunch whenever he makes them because he knows they’re her favorite.

He’s a lover boy at heart, if you were to look into his playlist, the songs you’d find in there probably wouldn’t be what you’d expect. Listens to bobby bland, which was heavily influenced by his uncle, old school rap, and he really likes love songs from the 90s because they make him feel calm, and allow him to imagine what his life would be like if he could have something like what they’re singing about. He’s terrified he’ll never be able to experience that due to his inability to open up to others. And often, he doesn’t even try to express the emotions that are tough to swallow, a firm believer in the saying that ‘once you’re down, it’s hard to get back up.’

Keeps his room pretty clean. It’s probably the one and only thing he has control over in his life, a constant for him. His room is his safe-haven so he treats it as such. It’s basically the same as 1610’s, just with a more matured look, a lot less color and less expression. He unfortunately lost that spark for a lot of his interests, so you won’t see more than a small punching bag, some boxing gloves hanging from the doorknob and few stragglers in the form of posters he didn’t feel like taking down.

He doesn’t like to argue, at all. He hates fighting with anyone he loves and he’s very quick to forgive them or squash the disagreement all together now that his dad is no longer here. When Jeff died, they were still on rocky terms from their previous dispute and even while years have passed, Miles still has yet to forgive himself for that. So now, he usually lets bygones be bygones, and never lets a conversation end on a bad note.

Continued growing his hair out once he realized it was a way for him to bond and spend more time with his mom. Within the little availability they do have, between her working doubles at the hospital, him being pulled in every direction now that he’s the ‘man of the house’—uncle Aaron’s words— and having to do things he’s not proud of to assist her while still going to school during the day, they make the time. Miles only gets it braided by her, and he enjoys the talks they have when he’s sat on the floor between her legs with his back to her. And when she’s done, regardless of how ridiculously embarrassing it is, and how he’s now over a head taller than her, he always lets her pinch his cheeks and call him her ‘handsome little man’. He hasn’t looked at a pair of hair shears since.

On that note, he is very, very defensive when it comes to his mother. Miles is not the kind to go around beating people up just for kicks; mostly because he’s not that kind of person, but also because even if he wanted to— he can’t.

In preparation for stepping into the prowler role Uncle Aaron put Miles into boxing/m.m.a classes when he turned fourteen, and he took to the skill very quickly. So well, in fact, that his hands can now technically be considered deadly weapons in the eye of the law due to his extensive training— which means he could get slapped with a ridiculous assault charge that would have him doing some time in a juvenile correction facility over a simple fist fight. (if he’s not masked as the prowler obviously).

But, some kid in his history class thought it’d be funny to make a slick comment about how Mrs. Morales was ‘single’ and ‘up for grabs’ now that his dad had passed, and the situation ended with Miles suspended for a week after he’d basically thrown his desk over to get to the kid, his knuckles bruised, and a tirade of complaints from the boy’s mother about his now-rearranged nose. However, after hearing the disgusting comment he had made about Miles’ mom, she was kind enough to not press charges and forced her son to apologize to the both of them.

That woman is his saving grace, literally. She stepped up in ways he didn’t even know were possible after his dad died, barely taking time for herself to grieve because she wanted to make sure her little boy didn’t fall apart. He doesn’t let anyone disrespect her and that’s always made known by him. He’s a mama’s boy.

They kind of have a titfortat thing going on, him and his mom. Like how she always stops in to ask him how his day was, if school is going well or if he needs anything, even if the time isn’t ideal and she’s talking to a sleepy Miles at 1am in the morning who can barely keep his eyes open. Or how his uniform is always freshly ironed and laid out for him in the morning, regardless of how exhausted she is and how badly she wants to crawl into bed after her shift. Or how when he’s sick, she’ll drive all the way across town to one of the only fresh markets that sells yuca root and white yautia so she can make him sancocho (a traditional puerto rican dish). It’s the one thing she knows always makes him feel better.

And Miles does nice things for her, too. Like draping a blanket over her sleeping form when she dozes off on the couch in front of the TV. Or making sure her phone is plugged in, so her alarm goes off in the morning, because sometimes she knocks out before she can bring herself to do it. He even goes as far as to secretly slip some extra cash he’s made from a recent job into the ‘RENT’ jar she keeps on her dresser— dropping a hundred in every now and then when she’s not there to see him do it. She’s never once asked him for help, but the one time he took it upon himself to offer it, he was shot down in seconds, and was made to promise her that he wouldn’t worry about it ever again. Her exact words being “You’re too young to worry about something like this mijo, okay? You take all the money you make from your after school job, every single penny, and you save it. Mama’s got this.”

But sometimes, she doesn’t. And Miles knows that she wants to be strong for him. For them. But it takes two, he knows that as well, so he helps out anyway.

And with prayers that they’re not short— Rio counts everything in the rent jar towards the end of the month, and a string of celebratory whoops and hollers will always sound from her room when she realizes they surprisingly have some extra cash that’ll allow her to take some days off and relax for once, and maybe even do something fun together. He’ll listen from his room with a knowing smile, more than happy to let his contributions remain undisclosed to affirm her efforts of providing for them the best she can. With her energy so depleted from how demanding her job is, she’s never suspected it was him discreetly assisting, and chalked it up to her forgetting how much she’d mindlessly dropped in there after each paycheck.

[miupow]

‧₊˚✩彡 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 /ˎˊ˗ 𝚌.𝚢𝚓 *ੈ✩‧

┆ rockstar!choi yeonjun x fem!reader ╰--⪼ one of the hardest things about dating a rockstar is the distance; when he’s on tour he’s thousands of miles away, busy and unable to call, and you spend months alone in a cold counting down the days until he gets home. but your boyfriend put some extra time aside to make a very special video call to his favorite girl.

. . . RATING ! NSFW, MDNFI! . . . WORDS ! 1.7k . . . WARNINGS ! soft dom!yeonjun, daddy kink, lots and lots of pet names, praise kink, sex toys, facetime sex, mutual masturbation, guided masturbation, a little angst in the beginning

for @napofamoon's growing pain rockstar!txt event! this is also a little christmas gift for her and all of my followers~~ thank you to @taegimood and @wolfytae-exe for proofreading!

You purposefully let the call ring out for a bit before answering– you didn’t want him knowing you had been pacing for an hour, waiting impatiently by the phone. 

“Hey beautiful,” Yeonjun croons immediately upon you picking up, pretty bare face filling up the screen of your phone– he must’ve just gotten out of the shower, his hair wet and pushed back, black tank top and flannel overshirt pulled on haphazardly like he had been in a rush… sometimes you hated how he looked so beautiful so effortlessly. It reminded you just how horrifically out of your league he was. “What are you up to? How was your day?”

“Mm.. not much. It’s been boring without you.” You sigh listlessly, giving Yeonjun a tight, unconvincing smile. “I didn’t have work today so Yunjin took me shopping– got some things for the apartment, some new clothes. Waited for you to call. I’m honestly more interested in how you’re doing, babe.”

Yeonjun gives you an apologetic little grin, eyes unreadable– it does nothing but makes you feel worse. At least he was aware he promised to call three hours earlier. “I’m sorry it’s so late, we had a show.”

“I know.” You reply, a little curt. Yeonjun doesn’t have complete control over his own schedule, pushed and pulled around everywhere he goes by both his managers and his other band members, bending over backwards for breaks snuck in between press appearances and shows every time he and his band were on tour… you’ve beat yourself senseless trying not to let it get to you.

“I’m sorry, baby, I really am.” Yeonjun repeated, voice low as he leaned in closer to the camera. “There was a problem with the sound system so our open started an hour late, and then there was a fight in the pit so we had to stop for security to kick them out, and then Beomgyu wanted to get drinks after the show and–” 

“It’s alright, Jjun. I understand.” You cut in, voice soft. Yeonjun gives you a look like he doesn’t quite believe you. “It sounds like you had a busy night… you always have a busy night.”

“Yeah, I’m sure things are real quiet when I’m not around.” Yeonjun gives you one of his signature grins, lopsided and handsome, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “Missing me yet?”

He wants you to respond with some snide joke, lighten the mood– Yeonjun’s begging for it, brown eyes nervously flitting across your face as his smile cracks and splinters, but you can’t bring yourself to do it. “So fucking much, Jjun.” you croak, “I miss you so fucking much.”

His face drops immediately, his unconvincing grin giving way to one much more solemn and sad– it makes your stomach churn, unable to stomach the helplesslessness in his eyes. “I miss you too, baby. I’ll be home soon.” 

“But when?” You press, even though you knew you shouldn’t. Conversations over ETAs only ever lead to fights– Yeonjun loved to make promises he knew he couldn’t keep. 

“Soon.” He repeats, his stare hard as he shifts on his hotel bed. “I’ll make it work. I’ll come and see you.” 

You knew he wouldn’t, but he was always such a sweet liar.

The look on your face must have given you away, because Yeonjun gives you a desperate, pleading pout, kissable lips pulled down into a grimace. It tears your heart to pieces. “Just bare with me baby, okay? The tour’s almost over, I’ll be home soon–”

“And then you’ll just go on tour again.” You spit, nastier than you meant for it to come out. The wide-eyed, guilty look Yeonjun gives you makes your heart drop to your stomach; you’re fairly sure you would have felt better if he had just gotten angry with you instead.

The sigh he lets out weighs a ton, settles on both of your shoulders. “Can we just talk about this later? We can talk about this when I get home, just– I love you. You know that, right?”

“I love you too,” You reply in a whisper.

“I love you more than anything in the world, baby, more than this.. stupid fucking job, okay?” You had never heard Yeonjun refer to his career as a “job” before… you weren’t sure what to make of it. “Everything I’m doing right now is for our future together; if I pull this off right we won’t have to work another day in our lives, do you understand? It’s fucking rough right now but we’ll get through it, baby, I know we will. It’s all for you, beautiful.”

“I love you,” you repeat, voice wobbly with unshed tears. You’ve heard this speech a thousand times but it never failed to break you down, make your heart full.

“God, gorgeous, I love you too. My everything. My future. Enough sadness, yeah?”

Yeonjun’s gentle, soft words snaps you out of your reverie, reminds you of your plans before getting lost in your own emotions– you hadn’t wanted this call to go this way at all… in fact, you had wanted it to go a different way entirely. You nod and quickly rub your eyes.

“Jjunie…” you start, still semi-sad voice melodic and now charged with a sweet, playful lilt. “I got you something, when I went shopping earlier…” 

Yeonjun catches your drift fast, his eyebrow raising with a mischievous grin; he was always so in sync with you, always understood your wants and needs like he could read your mind. “Oh? What’d you get me, sugar?”

You giggle, blink away the tears as you smooth your hands over your baggy sweater, play with the hem– you scoot back a bit, letting more of your body come into frame; Yeonjun hisses in a loud breath when he sees that sweater was the only thing you were wearing.. “I dressed myself all pretty for you, daddy– do you wanna see?”

“Fuck,” Yeonjun breathes, leaning even closer to the camera. His pretty brown eyes are blown wide, lids low as he bites at his plush lower lip. “Take it off, let daddy see.”

You’re slow in sliding off your sweater, teasing as you tug it up over your thighs, over your hips– Yeonjun drinks in every inch, hungry eyes locked on your thighs, and he lets out a low, nasty groan from deep in his chest when you reveal to him your pretty lace thong. 

“God, baby, you’re so fucking pretty,” he growls, “Turn around for me.” 

You follow his directions obediently, turn your back to show him your lace-covered ass as you finish peeling off your sweater— the sound Yeonjun makes is unholy, deep and nasty and matching the grin on his face. “Fuck, such a perfect ass. So beautiful.” 

“I miss you, daddy.” you whine, turning back to the camera to show Yeonjun your pout. His lips are gnawed raw, shiny with spit and pretty pink as he takes in greedy eyefuls of your bra-clad tits, coos at you so sweet and condescending. 

“Mm, I miss you too, sugar. Go on; show daddy how much you miss him. Take that bra off ‘n show him those pretty tits, hmm?” 

“Yes, daddy~” you purr, quick to reach behind you for the clasp. You’re teasing in sliding off your bra, let the straps hang off your shoulders for a moment before you take it off entirely. Your perky nipples pucker in the cold air, begging for attention— you know better than to touch without Yeonjun’s permission, however. 

He can read you like a book, knows exactly what you need as you squirm on camera. “Go ahead and touch, my good girl.” 

One hand flies to your breast, tweaking your nipple between your forefinger and thumb; the other moves to rub your clothed clit in tight circles. you let out a breathy moan at the feeling, fight every fiber of yourself to keep your eyes open— you don’t want to miss a single second of watching Yeonjun. He’s breathing heavy, hastily angled the camera down to show you the big bulge in his sweatpants. He strokes himself over the fabric with the lightest of touches, teasing the both of you as he pants into the microphone. “What I would do if I was there...”

“What would you do, daddy?” you ask lightly, feigning innocence, pinching your nipple with a whimper. You’re so wet you’re soaking through your little panties— you’re sure Yeonjun had noticed. 

“God, I’d fuck you so hard. Dressed up so pretty for me, you deserve a reward, fuck— I’d leave those panties on while I bend you over and fuck you good, fill you up with my cum… you’d let me, right angel? Let me breed that little pussy?”

You moan high in your throat, hips stuttering as you continue to circle your clit, play with your bud. “Yes, yes! M-more, daddy, I need more!”

Yeonjun squeezes himself through his sweats, snickers at your fucked-out face. “Oh, baby… how about you go and grab that little vibe you love so much, give daddy a little show?”

You don’t need to be told twice; nodding desperately, you reach for your bedside drawer and pull out your favorite vibrator, thin and pink and powerful enough to make you scream. You settle back into frame, position yourself with your thighs wide apart  so that Yeonjun has a full view of your drooling cunt, the soaked fabric of your thong clinging to your lips obscenely. You feel vulnerable and exposed, and you embrace it as Yeonjun drinks in your form.

Yeonjun’s too impatient to tease you, giving you an affirming nod so you can start running the vibe across your throbbing slit. “Don’t take those panties off,” Yeonjun orders, slowly untying his sweatpants. “Want you to play with yourself with them on, okay?”

You don’t like the sound of that. “But I want my fingers,” you whine, pathetic, “want something inside—“

“Nuh uh,” Yeonjun chastises, pulling his hard pink cock out and giving it a stroke— you hadn’t realized how much you missed it until you saw it again, cockhead flared and dripping precum. “Listen to daddy, baby. Nothing goes in that cunt except my cock, you hear me? Be patient— I’ll fill you up when I come home.”  

And it isn’t until after he’s made you cum in your panties, vibrator on your clit and fingers on your nipples, that he explains why; he has a surprise for you too. 

The rest of the tour was canceled. He’s coming home.

[woozivrsefactry]

xu minghao as your toxic best friend

(tw! toxicity ;; i remember getting an ask for this but can't find it now sorry op :p)

toxic bsf minghao who constantly undermines your other friendships, subtly convincing you that no one understands you like he does.

toxic bsf minghao who makes you feel guilty for spending time with other people, reminding you of all the times he’s been there for you when others weren’t.

toxic bsf minghao who often "jokes" about how you’d make the perfect couple, but his eyes hold a seriousness that makes you wonder if he’s actually joking.

toxic bsf minghao who is overly critical of anyone you show romantic interest in, finding flaws in them that you hadn’t noticed before.

toxic bsf minghao who always seems to know more about your life than you’ve told him, making you suspect he’s been snooping through your messages or social media.

toxic bsf minghao who frequently crosses physical boundaries under the guise of friendship, like holding your hand or hugging you a bit too long, making you question your feelings.

toxic bsf minghao who manipulates situations so that you end up alone with him more often, subtly sabotaging group plans or making others feel unwelcome.

toxic bsf minghao who gets overly jealous and possessive when you mention new friends or potential romantic interests, masking it as concern for your well-being.

toxic bsf minghao who showers you with gifts and attention whenever you seem to be pulling away, making it difficult for you to cut ties with him.

toxic bsf minghao who acts supportive and loving in public, but his demeanor shifts to cold and controlling when you’re alone together.

toxic bsf minghao who uses his charm and persuasive words to seduce you, making you feel special and desired in a way no one else ever has, and convinces you that he is the perfect man for you.

toxic bsf minghao who is incredibly attentive to your needs in bed, making sure you’re completely satisfied so you become even more emotionally and physically dependent on him.

toxic bsf minghao who whispers possessive words in your ear during intimate moments, reinforcing the idea that you belong to him and no one else.

toxic bsf minghao who loves marking you with love bites and hickeys in visible places, as a way of showing others that you’re taken.

toxic bsf minghao who becomes more controlling in bed, pushing your boundaries and being as much dominant and harsh on you as you can take of him.

toxic bsf minghao who insists on recording your intimate moments together, using them as leverage to ensure you never think about leaving him.

toxic bsf minghao who loves tying you up, spanking you and even some master/pet roleplay to feel the power over you.

toxic bsf minghao who encourages you to explore your fantasies and kinks with him, making you feel like he’s the only one who truly understands your desires.

toxic bsf minghao who eventually ends up as your boyfriend and sometimes makes you doubt if he really loved you all along or were you just a trophy for him to win against every other man.

[thefiery-phoenix]

YANDERE CHOI FAMILY HEADCANONS

I seriously pray for you if you're related to Charles or Crystal in some way, your privacy is immediately thrown out of the damn window and you won't ever have a moment to yourself since you'll always have your sister Crystal looking out for you and Charles would make sure Gun, Goo and DG keep an eye out for you too. He'd even ask Kouji to place a tracking device in your phone and ensure he always has access to whatever you're doing on your phone, he's a concerned parent after all and he doesn't trust this toxic world filled with darkness that could corrupt you and put you in danger. Look, he might be a complete scumbag and takes the pleasure of ruining people's lives but you're the apple of his eye and he'll do anything to ensure your safety

Let's start off with Charles Choi as a parental figure for you. He'll be controlling, manipulative and won't be above gaslighting you to spend time with him. He's a businessman after all, he's Elite, when he wants something he gets it no matter what and you're no exception for it. He NEEDS to know what you're doing at every second of the day, he doesn't care how old you are, you could be a literal adult and yet he'd still treat you like a child and infantize you. He's overbearing with his protectiveness for you, you almost feel suffocated in his presence. But you won't even realize he's secretly gaslighting you and making sure you're isolated from other people other than him and your sister and the people that he really trusts, he's really crafty and subtle about this. It's for your own good, he keeps telling himself as he threatens and blackmails one of your so called friends to leave you the hell alone unless they want to end up on the news the next day dead. He doesn't care if he's overbearing for you, he has every RIGHT to be overbearing, truthfully, he doesn't even realize what he's doing is wrong. He firmly believes that he has every right to do this since you're his child after all and he's your guardian and parental figure

He likes it when you rely on him for things, deep down he's slightly worried and nervous you'll grow up too fast and leave him and your sister behind and you won't need him anymore. He can't stand and fathom the thought of you being away from him, his paranoia for your safety and fear of losing you would act in an overdrive. Charles Choi has only one weakness and that's you, the dear apple of his eye. He sees you as some defenseless vulnerable innocent little thing that would get chewed up by the world within mere seconds and he'd be damned if someone dared to take advantage of you. It doesn't matter even if you know how to fight or how well aware you are of everything happening around you, he'll still pat your head in a patronizing manner like you're some kind of child and have a slight amused smirk while you're ranting to him. Silly naive child, you NEED him to take care of you

You won't be allowed to live a normal lifestyle, you'll have private tutors to teach you and the day he'll allow you attend a public school or university would be the day HELL would FREEZE over. He knows what sort of nonsense takes place in schools and universities these days with all those cases of rampant bullying and such. He doesn't want you falling into the hands of some lowly thug with no decorum. Of course, he'd have him killed that same night but still, he isn't going to take the risk and chance of having you get hurt. Your safety matters more than your happiness, you could plead with him as much as you want regarding you wanting to go to a public school to have a normal life and he'd just outright refuse you each and every single time, it's like you're talking to a brick wall with him. By no means is he an emotional man, he has no time for such frivolous nonsense but it just doesn't sit right with him when he imagines you getting hurt and getting scars as thoughts of the worst would flash his mind when he thinks of your life at a public school which would make him even more strict about your safety. He never wants to see the day you cry, it would just...pain him emotionally. If you're crying because of him, it was probably because of something unavoidable and he'll gently shush you and wipe your tears away as he pats your head. However if you're crying because of someone else, well...that person would disappear off the face of the earth, he goes straight for the kill. He's a man of his word and always gets straight to the point without beating around the bush, so one single shot to the head to end whatever lousy scumbag who dared to make your tears spill from your eyes would guarantee him to be dead. Surprisingly he won't let anyone else do his dirty work for him whenever he has to kill someone for messing with you, he needs to feel the satisfaction of watching the light of the world and the life leave the person's eyes as he kills them. Of course, he'll cover the death up by making it look like there was some kind of gang violence going on and blame one of his chess pawns and pay off the police department to keep their mouths shut unless they want to lose their jobs and get blacklisted from every company existing

He loves to spoil you till your heart desires. Ask him whatever you want, except for your privacy and freedom and he'd be more than happy to indulge his expenses for you. You like reading and publishing books? Well, look who managed to get a publishing contract from one of the most famous publishing companies in the country? But of course, you're not allowed to publish anything questionable like romance and such, he thinks you're way too naive for such things and you're young for it. You're also not allowed to use your real name. You're also expected to show him your works before you end up publishing something and of course, you won't need to feel the pressure of the publishers and editors pestering you constantly for new works, you can write at your own leisure. Not unless they want their company to shut down and be on the streets for the rest of their miserable lives. He'll never entertain the idea and thought of someone every daring to dictate your life. Other than him of course, he has that right thanks to his twisted mindset of keeping you safe. You like singing and music? He'll get you the best brands of instruments money can buy and a whole karaoke system for you. He'd love to hear you sing and would have a smile on his face, telling you how proud he is of you for your wonderful and melodious singing, he thinks you sing as sweet as a nightingale. Well, in a way you are a nightingale trapped in a golden cage. If you're into art he'll get you the best quality of brushes and you'll have an unlimited amount of canvases and art supplies for your use. You'll have an entire art studio at the house for yourself and he'll be pleased when you hand him a painting or one of your art works. He would definitely store all your works in a secret room to ensure they don't get ruined and where he'll have access too since other people don't deserve to see your talent, they're undeserving pests who don't have the right to look at you in the eye

You won't ever get wind of what he does behind the scenes regarding the crews and gangs and how he rose to power and such and he'll do whatever the hell it takes to prevent you from finding out the truth about him. You'll be left in the dak regarding all the evil messed up things he does and unless someone wants to lose their tongue, they'd better keep their mouths shut. Also there's no reason for you to work, whatever do you want to work for, don't be silly. However if you really want to work, he make you join his company and you can have your own office just for the sake of it but no actual responsibilities. If you think of applying for jobs elsewhere, he'll pull in some strings to ensure you don't end up getting the job. He doesn't care that he's sabotaging your chances of getting a job, you aren't allowed to be away from him, away from your family, end of discussion

While Charles would handle the killings and brutal stuff, your sister Crystal handles the planning and goes for a more calculated approach from behind the scenes. If you have the habit of maintaining a diary, guess who knows all your secrets now and you've also just sentenced half the people in your diary to death. Look, she loves you and cares for you, in her own twisted manner after all, she inherited her father's possessiveness and obsessive tendencies to protect you after all. Like her dad, she views you as someone who's pure for this world and she wants to keep you sheltered in a safe bubble by whatever means necessary. She might love you but the minute you're up to something she will immediately snitch on you to Charles. Don't ever expect her to take your side though during an argument regarding your feelings of being trapped and such, she'll always side with her dad no matter what and thinks he's doing the right thing by shielding you from the world outside. You'll understand in due time how much they love you

If someone picks on you, she'll find a way to ruin their life socially by spreading allegations and such against that person and ensure their name gets dragged down in the mud. Which honestly isn't a hard thing to do for her. She is borderline insane and crazy, she just masks it like her dad, she'll be breathing down your neck every damn second of the day and she'll always have her eye on whatever you do. She'll have Gun and Goo follow you everywhere and she'll tag along as well. You're not allowed to go anywhere without her. She'll also be able to detect whenever you're lying, her eyes will narrow instantly and stare at you with a stern look on her face like a strict parent till she finds out whatever your intentions are and if they're something she and her dad won't approve of they're shutting it down immediately before that thought of yours can grow into something bigger. Even she has access to your laptop and phone, although the only contacts you're ever allowed to have are your dad, her, Gun, Goo, Kouji and DG, that's IT. Don't even THINK about dating, romance is off the table for you

You might not know about the secret of her two bodies, she prefers to keep it that way and her dad told her to let it remain a secret as well, it'll make it easier for her to be with you at all times. She's experienced a lot of bullying from people because of her weight and thinks society is shallow for prioritizing people's looks and appearances which is why she doesn't want you suffering the same way she did and she'll tell you things that'll give you a negative view of romance. She just doesn't want you getting hurt like she did, she's a protective big sister trying to keep you safe. She won't like it if you hang around Daniel too much, he's always getting in some or the other kind of trouble and the last thing she needs is for you to end up being dragged into his messes and the whole crew nonsense so she'll ensure you maintain a distance from him till she sneakily isolates you from him completely. Don't feel bad, you have her to rely on, your sister is always there to lend a shoulder for supporting you. Overall, Charles and Crystal are borderline insane, psychotic and won't hesitate to wipe out anyone who stands against them or tries to take you away from them. You're the apple of their eye after all...

[belphegorbillickin]

Obey Me! Love Languages (+Side Characters)

(CW!): Yandere-ish behavior in the Levi, Diavolo, and Belphie sections. Diavolo is the worst out of the three.

Lucifer:

Nothing makes Lucifer much happier than simply spending time alone together, especially in bed.

(He practically jumps you every Devilgram I swear.)

He's more than willing to keep chaste if that's what you prefer though. Lucifer cherishes any and all time you spend with him.

He prefers to go somewhere private with you, where he can let his guard down completely and tell you exactly how much he appreciates you, but he enjoys calmer, more "mature" dates as well.

You don't even have to talk to each other, simply spending time together makes his (shriveled, blackened) heart swell and tension ease.

Although if you'd like to completely remove his tension…

(Have I mentioned that this man is even more desperate than Mammon and Asmo combined? Give this ancient babygirl a hug and a back massage.)

You may or may not be as busy as he is, but he still sees you being willing to spend what little time you both have together as a big gesture.

It certainly is for him at least, as he's far too busy to entertain someone he doesn't truly care for.

It may sound odd coming from an effectively "ageless" being, but time is honestly his most limited resource.

Lucifer's too much of a perfectionist and control freak to let you do anything big, but he deeply appreciates anything you do to make his life easier.

Even something as small as bringing him breathtakingly bitter hell coffee or a pen he forgot brightens his day considerably.

Of course, being the Avatar of Pride, he's more than happy to receive any and all compliments you give him.

They're not exactly uncommon, but he feels they sound so much sweeter coming from your lips.

(Lips he would love to kiss if you'd just let him…)

You know you've made it when Lucifer allows you to see his vulnerable side and trusts you enough to ask for help with the more serious, complicated tasks.

Something no other human, demon, or angel, will likely ever have the privilege of experiencing.

Mammon:

It's canonically stated that whoever he loves is showered in riches, and I don't believe it's just from his latent power.

What better way for the avatar of greed to show he loves you than to be selfless and give you what's his?

Anything that reminds him of you is already in his hands before he can even think about it, paid for or not.

It can be something as simple as a pretty flower or a giant piece of furniture he thinks you'll look great relaxing in.

It's a shame it won't fit in your room, but that just means you'll have to come visit him in his more often. He totally didn't plan that though! (You know he did.)

He's also a huge showboat and always tries to go for the most extravagant options even if it doesn't actually add anything either of y'all would like.

Mammon was already pretty horrible at budgeting, but after becoming infatuated with you it's almost like he's actively trying to get into a ridiculous amount of debt with everyone.

It's only because he desperately wants to impress you and show how much you mean to him, by any and all means possible.

Of course Mammon would love to receive some gifts in turn, but I feel like, unless they were homemade or otherwise really special, he'd start to take it for granted and complain when it's not expensive enough.

It's not that he means to take advantage of you or doesn't appreciate it, but he is the Avatar of Greed after all, and you're feeding into it.

What really makes him feel loved is when you defend him publicly and happily turn down the others to spend more time with him.

He doesn't mean it in a nasty way unlike some demons, *cough* *cough* Levi & Belphie, but the way his brothers have treated him has worn on him a bit.

You know you've made it when Mammon finally feels secure enough to say he loves you with zero hesitation.

Alone, in front of his brothers, even in front of Simeon and Diavolo and the others. He'll scream it from the rooftops if you want him to.

Leviathan:

Leviathan is actually very generous. He's offered to buy things for his brothers and MC surprisingly often.

It makes sense in a way, as he doesn't really have to do much to maintain it. He can just drop the gift and run when he's nervous, rather than having to stay still while holding your hand or possibly tripping over his words and getting rejected when he tries to say something nice.

I bet he feels as though even if someone didn't like him they would at least like the gift, and then maybe they'll eventually like the source of all the gifts as well.

I could definitely see Levi trying to "buy" your love even if he doesn't realize it.

He's also very helpful when he wants to be, Satan even listed him as his most reliable brother.

It makes him feel good to do things for other people and again, he feels like maybe people will like what he does for them even if they don't like him the same way.

It's not as though he hates compliments and any other loving comments, but he's never really going to believe them until you've already "proven it" through your other actions.

If anything it has a very high chance of backfiring if that's your main way of showing affection, especially if you're a kind person in general.

Levi has got a nasty habit of twisting everyone's words against them and he's not gonna kick it anytime soon, regardless of any reassurance you give him.

His insecurities are far too deeply rooted and connected to his very existence as the Avatar of Envy to be soothed so easily.

Even gifts are a much better way into his heart, if you take the time to research his collection and support his hobbies that is.

Not only did you take the time to listen to what he says, but you spent all that time and effort tracking it down, waiting in line, or staying at the website refreshing repeatedly until you could buy it.

It shows him you're fully supportive and not embarrassed to be seen as a "weeb." That you won't pretend to not know him in public when he freaks out the latest Ruri-chan merch and proudly displays it on his person.

What really makes Leviathan believe you love him is getting jealous over him and turning down the others to be with him.

Especially if you made plans with them first and then ditched them for Levi when he threw a fit.

It's very mean-spirited, unlike Mammon who mostly wants reassurance. As Leviathan actually wants to feel them hurting, but again, he's a demon and The Avatar of Envy at that. Take the most jealous, unreasonable, and controlling person you know and multiple it by a thousand. That's what he has to deal with in his head 24/7, and though he does a very admirable job of keeping them as thoughts rather than actions, it's still a very heavy strain and things do slip out.

Levi will end up throwing a fit if you try to restrict his Ruri or TSL time out of jealousy, but any H-games and etc. are fair game so long as you promise to pick up the slack.

He'll even stop going to idol meet and greets for you, but it's only fair you start restricting your time with other people (including his brothers) in return, right? Right?

…Yeah, good luck handling that.

You know you've made it when Leviathan feels confident enough to regularly initiate physical contact and casually ask for your time and affection.

It's not that he doesn't like it, he's completely touch starved and has been fantasizing about initiating for a while, it's that he's completely sure he'll be rejected or mess it up somehow.

Or that it'll become overstimulating and he'll hurt your feelings by abruptly breaking it off when it suddenly becomes too much.

It means that you've brought his self-esteem up quite a bit, that Leviathan finally trusts that you won't suddenly make fun of him. That you actually like him for who he is and not in spite of it.

Satan:

Satan likes to show his love through gifts, acts of service, and the occasional sprinkle of affectionate words. Possibly even through poetry he wrote himself. He wants to show you that he's the superior choice. The reliable, practical, and in-the-know choice without being too stuffy and uptight, unlike some people. *cough* Lucifer *cough*

He also prides himself on his knowledge, and would be very eager to share said knowledge with you.

Feel free to ask him about any topic you want, chances are he at least knows a good book for it. If he somehow doesn't, then he'll gladly try to find one for you.

Just don't expect him to do your coursework or any other intellectual work for you. As much as Satan loves to be useful, he values self-sufficiency and growth even more.

He just can't understand wanting to cheat yourself out of a possible learning experience, and only wants the best for you.

What makes him feel loved is when you acknowledge his flaws but don't make excuses or demonize him for them.

When you don't push too hard for him to open up or spend all of his time with you, and instead set a schedule of sorts so the two of you always have at least some time together without it becoming too much.

He's not the biggest fan of physical contact though, as the circumstances of his "birth" meant that non-violent contact was rare until he finally calmed down and repaired the few relationships that he had. Truth be told, he also a bit afraid of hurting you. Satan's afraid that he'll instinctively lash out when you touch him suddenly, or that he'll hold on too tightly when he goes to touch you himself. You'd never know it now, the way he handles his centuries old books and week old kittens, but Satan is not gentle by nature. He won't shove you away or anything, but he will tense up and never initiate "pointless" physical contact even if he knows you love it until you let him approach it at his own pace.

You know you've made it when Satan finally opens up and doesn't avoid talking about his insecurities and weak points, or feel as though he's competing with Lucifer for your affection anymore.

When he feels free to act as he would like to instead of trying to compensate for his inexperience by imitating romance novels. When Satan doesn't feel as though he has to hide his purely demonic upbringing and everything that comes with it in fear of intimidating or scaring you off.

Asmodeus:

I feel like Asmodeus' love languages are pretty obvious, as in he absolutely adores all of them, as he's got so much affection to give and is plenty eager to receive.

He especially loves spoiling you and dressing you up. It's as much for his benefit as it is yours.

It's the same with all the pictures he takes of the two of you. He considers himself very generous indeed for sharing your beauty with the world instead of keeping it to himself, unlike some people.

Asmo will tell you as much himself, in fact, he never grows tired of describing your beauty in every possible way he could.

You can't go more than a day without him comparing at least one aspect of you to some beloved art piece or wonder of nature.

And of course, you can't forget the physical affection. Asmo lives for the chance to run his fingers along your skin and drape himself across you.

Platonically, romantically, sexually, it's all amazing to him.

He also finds testing out all sorts of creams and lotions on you incredibly intimate and relaxing, despite always preferring to be the one being pampered before.

You know you've made it when Asmodeus allows you to see him at his "ugliest," whether that be physically or emotionally, and trusts that you won't leave him for it.

When he feels like you would still be with him even if he never did anything sexual again.

It may or may not seem like that big of a deal to you, but Asmodeus is incredibly insecure deep down.

He can't help but feel like he'll never be as loved as he was back in heaven all those years ago, and certainly not for the same reasons.

What Asmodeus needs is someone who will prove that wrong, that sees him as something more than to look at and get off with.

Beelzebub:

"You didn't get me a snack? It's okay. I don't mind being stuck with you forever." (Slightly Used Handcuff Item - 2020 Valentine's Event)

Beelzebub makes it extremely obvious that what he wants more than anything is just to enjoy being by your side.

You don't have to do anything special or even talk, just showing that you're willing to spend time with him is proof enough of your love.

It's also how he shows affection. Like how even though he's not that interested in anime or video games, and Levi usually doesn't let him play (thanks to his messy eating and sticky hands,) Beel still goes into Levi's room surprisingly often.

Honestly, I'm not convinced part of it isn't at least partially from PTSD as well.

Beelzebub feels the need to stay by your side so that he can always be there to take the hit for you.

So that he can see you're still here with his own two eyes and not permanently gone the second he turns around.

What really makes him feel loved is when you look out for his emotional well-being and refuse to let him put himself last.

When you don't take his self-sacrificing ways for granted or come to expect them.

It doesn't matter how you show your appreciation, he's grateful for anything you give him, so long as you do it.

He is a bit insecure however. Both about his behavior and his appearance, as surprising as that may be to anyone who's seen him.

His demon form is associated with something most humans find disgusting after all. So he really appreciates any way you try to reassure him about it.

You know you've made it when Beelzebub is consistently willing to share his food with you.

Beelzebub arguably has the worst control over his sin and readily admits it. Belphie is the only other person he'd ever really share his own food with, and even then not all of it all the time.

But the ultimate test is when he's willing to go against Belphegor for you, even if it's just not immediately agreeing with everything he says.

Beelzebub feels very indebted to Belphie, no matter how many times he tells him it's fine Beel still feels like he has to do any and everything to make up for it.

So if he's willing to go against that, willing to risk upsetting Belphie, it means that you mean everything to him.

Belphegor:

Belphie's all about physical touch and quality time. Both in the sense of spending all of your time with him, and in the sense of not spending that time with anyone else, except Beel of course.

Not just cuddling in bed or taking naps together, but holding hands, letting him lean against you, and kissing are all things Belphie also really enjoys, and expects.

Despite getting embarrassed fairly easily by some of his brothers at times, it's almost impossible to ignore PDA when you lean into it like that, and he's desperate to stake his claim even in public. (Though his embarrassment quickly fades as he becomes more comfortable being vulnerable with you and his brothers again. His guarded, territorial behavior quickly turns into bragging and "tests of your loyalty" after that.)

Now, despite that he does expect you to respect when he wants his alone time, but Belphegor doesn't respect your boundaries all that well until you make him.

Not that he minds if you do try to force him to stop being as much of a spoiled brat though, he likes someone that can give as good as they can get so long as you do it with love.

He's another one that wants to watch you crush his brothers' hopes and dreams in favor of spending time with him. Not Beel though, never Beel.

Seriously, he likes to make out in public and actively fantasizes about his brothers getting jealous because of it in his devilgrams.

(He's also the most suggestive even after they started toning everything down. He gets implied sex and makes out several times a devilgram while other characters don't even get kisses at all sometimes.)

Belphegor is a Belphewhore when it comes to you. (Which is rather fitting, if you know anything about demonology.)

You know you've made it when this lazy cow gets up off his ass to do something for you, something usually only reserved for Beel.

Now, normally being compared to someone you're trying to date's twin brother would be a bad thing, but not in this case.

It just means the only one who will ever be equally important as his figurative other half is his twin, his literally magically and psychically connected other half.

The deepest form of trust is when he fully entrusts Beel's safety and happiness to you.

He may not seem as outwardly protective as his twin, but he is very much so, and he's become even more paranoid and codependent after being forcefully separated for so long.

Whereas Beel is more concerned with physical safety, Belphegor is more concerned with Beelzebub's mental state.

He knows his twin has a tendency to be self-sacrificing, full of guilt, and a bit too eager to take things at face value at times (despite being the emotionally intelligent out of all of them) for a demon. He also knows plenty of people would take advantage of that, intentionally or not.

Belphegor will act uncaring, but he's carefully monitoring your interactions with Beelzebub and paying attention to all of the shared feelings from their connection, intent on matching them up to see if you caused any of his poor moods.

Diavolo:

Lord Diavolo constantly puts himself into frustrating lose-lose situations.

He only really feels assured if you keep coming to him of your own free will, but he's so terrified of rejection and losing you that he rarely ever allows you to do just that.

He's always coming up with some brand new scheme or just outright forcing you to come to him, sometimes even physically, which only reinforces his bad habits and insecurities.

It doesn't matter how much you try to resist. Do you really believe you could do something to stop it when even several-thousand-year-old Lucifer and his strong-willed brothers can't? When even Barbatos couldn't? You'd need the power of God and anime on your side for even a small chance at that.

He'll literally pick you up or drag you if he has to, laughing all the while, refusing to take it seriously as you squirm even though he's really hurt deep down.

He tries to keep in mind that some people are "shy" and don't want to be dragged out all the time, but if you say, take the week in between his tiring plots to catch up on coursework and relax, he'll start to worry you're distancing yourself.

Diavolo's severe abandonment and boundary issues make it nearly impossible for you to challenge them without doing exactly what he wants, when he wants.

Who does he think he is, some kind of all-powerful demon lord or something?

Diavolo doesn't consider himself to be a big gift-giver, but he spoils those he appreciates regardless, and you receive his love on a completely different level.

He's just so used to opulence and never wanting for anything purchasable (easily or not) that he may overwhelm you with uncomfortably extravagant displays without even considering how the average human might react.

Want some chocolate? Diavolo will have Barbatos summon the most skilled chocolatiers immediately.

Can't find the perfect formal wear for yourself? He's calling in his personal tailors to make the most beautiful pieces of clothing you've ever seen in your life.

And yet despite all that it can still fall a bit flat at times.

Diavolo is the most flexible with this form of affection, but he can still be very inconsiderate in a sense.

He takes being told it's a bit too much surprisingly well, but he's fairly controlling about the gifts themselves.

You don't like the colors he picked? Too bad. It matches his own outfit and the color you want would match with the brothers instead and etc.

Sometimes it almost feels like the gifts are more for him than you, or that they come with hidden expectations rather than to make you happy.

Even though he really does want to make you happy, very much so in fact.

You know you've made it when Diavolo finally trusts you to come back to him on your own. Something that might take years and years of "absolutely perfect loyalty."

When he's not constantly sending you messages every time you're apart and doesn't try to force his way into every outing or private moment you have.

Quality time is still his main love language, giving and receiving, and he's still very aggressive in his attempts to spend time with you, but it's expressed in a (slightly) healthier way.

It does mean fighting against his very nature as a demon, even more so than he already does, but he's more than willing to try for you.

Barbatos:

Despite being quite powerful himself, people are often so used to taking advantage of him that they don't see him as much of a person compared to others.

He's rarely Barbatos and often "The Prince's Butler, who happens to be called Barbatos" instead.

Barbatos is targeted quite often by various groups of people, but few of them are after his attention specifically, instead of his power and connections.

He doesn't really allow himself to date in general. Besides not having the time for it, he's too worried about accidentally giving a spy or old Demon King loyalist an opening to cause trouble.

Whether that'd be because he's distracted or because he somehow ends up dating that kind of demon, Barbatos is rarely a risk taker when it comes to Diavolo's safety.

Even when he's liked it's usually for what he can do for other people, like Beelzebub wanting to keep him as his chef and Solomon eyeing his powers for example.

The only one who's really broke past that in the last couple of centuries has been Luke, who's come to be like an adopted son (or pet chihuahua) of sorts to him.

As much as the child loves to say he's using Barbatos, it's clear that the affection is mutual.

Now, a lowly human on the other hand? He'd worry about them being taken hostage or having loose lips, but otherwise they're fairly harmless. Barbatos has all the power in the relationship, just the way he likes it.

In a way, humans' short lifespans also helps to prepare Barbatos for the possibility of seeing your untimely death.

He knew what he was getting into, even if he's gotten far more attached to you than he ever intended to.

In a way, your presence eventually becomes synonymous with respite to him.

At first because of the physical aspect of entertaining you, but it slowly starts to be because of you specifically.

How sweetly you talk to him, really talk to him and not at him. The way you're so considerate in ways that even angels are not for a "mere butler."

Not much longer after that, it comes to be everything about you, even your smile becomes enough to make his day.

Besides being helpful, proving you're willing to "stoop down to his level" and "serve the servant" makes him much more willing to believe you're genuine.

In his (plentiful) experience, pretending to actually enjoy helping out in person is much harder to fake than anything else, especially for the snobbish nobles typically attempting to gain Lord Diavolo's favor.

Barbatos is another hardcore perfectionist who takes his work extremely seriously, who would rather die than let anyone else do it for him, especially since it would cause him to look as if he was "slacking." However, small things like drawing a bath for him, bringing him his favorite snacks, and giving him massages really helps him relax and feel loved.

He's also very fond of homemade gifts for similar reasons. The thought of someone going to all that effort for "just a butler" is very much appreciated.

Despite being such a perfectionist he'll accept the love put into almost anything you give him if it's made with care and free of the furry beasts he despises so strongly.

He'll have them all displayed properly in his room, in a way that will let them last longer, right next to everything Luke has made for him.

You know you've made it when Barbatos allows you to take care of him and ease his burdens.

When he'll allow you to wash his hair and pour tea for the both of you without stressing about how perfect it may or may not be.

Solomon:

Solomon's main love languages are gift giving and acts of service, and yes, you're gonna have to eat his cooking and you're gonna have to like it.

More seriously though, I'd argue it's quality time and acts of service, both giving and receiving.

He may have an excess of years left, for the understatement of the century, but he knows not everyone else does.

So Solomon really cherishes what little time you're willing to give him, especially if it means ignoring the demon brothers in favor of him. Asmodeus included. Solomon needs to know you're willing prioritize humanity, and him of course, before he can really begin to trust you and let you in.

He's also very fond of physical touch, he's close to Asmo for a reason after all, but that doesn't actually assure him your love is true regardless of how much he enjoys it.

You know you've made it when Solomon is fully willing to become attached and admit it to himself, regardless of any potential heartbreak he may suffer.

When he's ready to tell you so, to make concrete plans about the future with you, instead of for you, and commit to them fully.

But he also really does want to see you eating his cooking, that he infuses with all of his love just for you, every day.

Simeon:

Simeon is another tricky one, as he rarely allows people get close enough to see his more vulnerable side. Not even those that he was once brothers in arms with.

I believe one major indicator of Simeon being truly in love with you is when he's seeking out your touch.

When he's always brushing his fingers against your shoulders and grabbing your waist as he walks past, just to feel your skin.

Or even allowing you to come to bed with him, "just to cuddle, of course" he says, despite the major risks being that close poses for an angel already teetering on the edge. That's not to say that he doesn't express it through other means, like through the written word, but his playful brushes against you and sly smiles as he tells his white lies to get some alone time are something exclusive to your (not-so-secret) relationship.

He does however, always want to spend time with you. Even before he's ready to fully commit and be completely vulnerable around you.

You may or may not have that much time together after all, and he wants to spend as much of it as possible with you. Simeon also adores teasing the ones he loves, and that will most likely be the first bit of "personalized" affection he gives you. He just can't get enough of your embarrassed faces and mannerisms.

You know you've made it when Simeon is willing to trust you with all of his darkest thoughts and concerns.

When he can trust you won't judge him for his sins or try to guide him to any particular path.

When he's certain you'll stay true, and value and respect his guidance, no matter what form he's in or what he's done.

It's a common idea I know, but I got an ask for it literally years ago and I wanted to dump my reasons onto y'all anyway.

The draft date on AO3 said I started it in the middle of 2021, which should explain exactly why I feel bad about taking requests.

Also shameless self promotion, but I have a full Obey Me! rewrite fic out now!

Please do note that this is a fully realized fem OC with her own personality, not a gender neutral reader insert, and there are a lot of potential triggers involved.

So please make sure to read the tags fully before going in!

But don't worry, everything else will stay gender neutral and reader insert! Nothing is going to change about that here or on tumblr.

[flametrashiraarchive]

I have come to demand Giyuu HCs with chubby reader

*crawls out of a Muzan-smut-induced coma and gives you a shaky thumbs up.*

Oui, yes. More Tapioca.

Tomioka Giyuu x Chubby reader

Mild NSFW below the cut. GN!reader.

It's unsurprising that when you first meet him, he doesn't speak much. He doesn't really speak to anyone. The other hashira told you not to take it personally (but it WAS personal)

He spends most of the encounter with his back to you.

Honestly, your first impression of him is that he's kind of a jerk, because how could you possibly know what's really going on in his head?

The fact of the matter is he has never seen anyone who looks so... comforting.

He really really wants to hug you. And he knows that's weird. So he just... doesn't look at you. He doesn't even acknowledge your existence.

Except he does, when no one's looking.

He finds comfort in just watching you, seeing you smile with the other hashira, watching how you adapt fighting styles to suit your body type, a little bit (a lottle bit) hypnotized by the way your hips sway when you walk.

He pines silently until you decide enough is enough and try to figure out what exactly his deal is.

Shinobu just straight up tells you he has a crush on you (the poor guy's ears are bright red as his blood runs cold.)

"Oh... I thought you didn't like me. I have a crush on you too, Giyuu."

He's practically a statue for the rest of the day. Tomioka brain go brrrrr.

After that you spend more time together,

He keeps bringing you food, your favorite snacks... he asked around and... not because of your weight... just... that's how he shows affection. He doesn't mean to offend... oh god...

He messed up, didn't he? He always messes up.

You have to assure him it's okay.

little by little he opens up.

But once those floodgates are open and he's comfortable in your relationship there is no holding him back.

Soft tummy? Pillow. Big booty? Pillow. Thick thighs? Pillow pillow.

This man is so touch-starved he won't leave you alone.

Even during hashira meetings which call for decorum, he'll still link his pinky finger with yours just so he's touching something.

He enjoys just being with you in comfortable silence, resting his cheek on your belly while you drape your arm over him.

He falls asleep like that and his face gets all smushy. It's adorable. (This man has INSANE bed hair.)

If you ever feel self conscious about your body, or really just about anything, he'll sit and listen to your concerns and then calmly inform you that you're so fucking wrong about yourself.

He knows what it's like to be filled with doubt and to question your worthiness. He doesn't want you to feel that way at all.

How could you think that about yourself? Just look at you. You're the most beautiful person he has ever seen.

And then he'll show you, because words can be difficult but loving you is easy.

He will slowly but firmly rail the self doubt outta you.

His self control is hanging by a fiber of a thread the entire time. He treads the fine line between being in control of his body and being an absolute quivering mess.

Whispers "fffffuuuuuck" and buries his face against any body part in reach when it all gets too much for him.

No amount of self doubt can convince you he isn't absolutely besotted and completely wrecked by you and your body.

He just really really really really likes you.

So please... please hug him.

He really needs it.

[concreteangel92]

Reuploaded!!

The original post wasn’t showing up in any of the tags, didn’t matter what I did so here we are again 🤣 sorry if it’s confusing anyone who had already liked it haha that one has now been deleted.

This one actually feels very personal for me, due to two abusive relationships, and my last one in particular, I’ve struggled to even have men near me in the last 3 years, let alone anything else, so this was very therapeutic for me to write so thank you haha and I hope you enjoy it 🖤

Noah Sebastian x female reader

18+

Warnings: smut, mention of abusive relationships and talks of trauma and PTSD but nothing graphic

The day had finally come, you’d married the love of your life and your soul mate.

The wedding had been perfect, you felt like a queen in your dress, all of your closest friends and family had been there to celebrate your day with you and nothing had gone wrong.

You were now in the bedroom of your shared apartment with Noah, however the butterflies you had in your stomach were now starting to feel like a heard of elephants stomping around.

You and Noah had been together a while now, but you’d never actually slept together. Most is fooled around and even that took time for you to feel comfortable enough to do it.

Unfortunately due to your past relationship which had been mentally and emotionally abusive, it had left you with too much trauma to be able to be physical with Noah, you just couldn’t allow someone to be that close to you anymore.

You felt so stupid most days, like it’s just Noah, you love him and he loves you, being with him should be something you jumped at but sadly every time you tried, you started to feel suffocated and claustrophobic and had to stop before you had a bad panic attack.

Noah fully knew your past and what this guy had done to you and was so understanding, he never pushed you to do anything, and when you did go slightly further then he always let you be in control, if you said stop then it stopped instantly.

You’d made the decision to wait until your wedding night to finally be fully intimate with him, something Noah was so respectful of.

And here you both were, still wearing your dress and suit and ready to spend the night together.

You’d be lying however if you said that you weren’t absolutely terrified, something Noah could clearly see.

“We don’t have to do anything tonight you know, if you’re not ready?”

You shook your head.

“No I am ready, I really want to…I’m just…scared”

Noah gave you a small smile and came and knelt down in front of you where you sat on the end of the bed and took your hands in his.

“Can you tell me what you’re frightened of?”

His voice was so gentle it made your heart swell. You took a moment to compose your thoughts.

“I guess it’s because, to be that close to someone again, means that it’s real…and then it hurts more when you’re gone”

“When I’m gone?”

You nodded slowly.

“Yeah it’s silly but after…him…I knew I could never go through that kind of heartache again…obviously at the time I saw my whole future with him and then it was ripped away from me and I…I just lost who I was completely after everything he did…until I met you. And I love you so much, I honestly do and I want to be with you so badly but yeah….I’m just scared that being intimate with you will make it harder if you suddenly didn’t want to be with me again”

Noah’s eyes softened and he raised your hands to give you a kiss on the back of it.

“I’m not going anywhere Y/N. You’re stuck with me now forever”

He showed his ring on his finger as he laughed lightly.

“You are the most beautiful, kind and funniest person I have ever met, you’re my best friend and I can’t wait for us to grow old together. If you want to wait then we will wait but if not, then I promise you are in complete control and we can go as slow or as fast as you want”

You smiled as you felt a couple tears fall from your eyes which Noah wiped away instantly.

“Can you…help me take off my dress?”

“Of course”

You stood up and turned around so Noah could unzip your dress from the back, you felt his fingers gently running along your skin as he went causing a small shiver to run up your spine.

Noah started to pull the dress away from your shoulders and you felt his lips ghosting over your skin as he did.

You felt your dress fall the floor and it pooled around your feet. Now although you were nervous, you had made sure you had a nice black lace underwear set on under your dress, just as a little surprise for Noah, so when you stepped out and then turned around, Noah’s eyes instantly went wide as he took in your appearance.

“Fuck me”

You giggled “isn’t that the point?”

Noah moved closer to you and lent down so he could press his lips onto yours.

“Do you want to get more comfortable on the bed?”

You nodded but started to help him slip his jacket and tie off. “Doesn’t feel right me being the only one half dressed”

Noah threw his jacket off to side and left his shirt unbuttoned so you could see all of the tattoos on his neck and chest, you smiled and slipped that off his shoulders before grabbing his hand and leading him to the side of the bed.

Once you were both comfortable, Noah lent in and started to kiss you. It was soft and gentle at first, no rush or sense of urgency, just simply enjoying the moment. You relaxed back onto the pillows and Noah settled down beside you, the warmth of his skin feeling comforting on yours and he slipped one hand behind you to cradle your neck while his other ran up and down your arm lightly.

The kiss soon started to become more passionate and Noah detached his lips from yours and started to kiss along your jaw and then onto your neck, your head moving to the side automatically for him.

Noah’s hand then played with the straps of the bra you were wearing as he kissed along your collarbones.

“Can I take this off?”

You whispered out the word yes and you arched your back up so Noah could reach round and undo the clasp and he pulled it away from your body.

You resisted the urge to bring your arms up and instead, kept one around his chest and the other lying on the sheets, your fingers tapping absently as you relaxed your muscles down.

Noah then lent down and flicked his tongue over one of your nipples before he sucked it into his mouth, his other hand coming up to help simulate your other breast. You could feel the ache forming into between your legs as Noah continued and switched his hand and mouth over.

You raised one of your knees up so your leg was bent and your hand ran through his soft hair which was tickling your skin.

Noah sensing that you were starting to need more, very slowly ran his fingers along your stomach and stopped when he reached your underwear, he lifted his head up so he could look into your eyes.

“May I?”

You nodded but Noah wanted more than that.

“I’ll need your words angel, I don’t want to misunderstand anything tonight”

You smiled and gave him your verbal consent, Noah sat back slightly and hooked his fingers into your underwear and he pulled them down and off your legs and discarded them next to the bed.

Seeing you all laid out and bare for him caused to stare at you as if you were the most beautiful sight he’d ever seen. His intense gaze definitely caused your cheeks to go warm and you felt your knees closing together, to which Noah placed his hands on them and stopped you from doing so.

“Please don’t hide from me, you’re so fucking beautiful Y/N, I can’t believe how lucky I am to have you”

“I’m definitely the lucky one”

Noah smiled and ran his fingers very slowly over your thighs but not going too close.

“Tell me what you want angel?”

The blush became even more prominent.

“Can you use your fingers and…eat me out please?”

Although you had done this with him before, this felt like the most intimate moment of your life, it was so different to anything you both had done before.

“I thought you’d never ask”

Noah settled himself in between your legs and placed soft kisses along your inner thigh while his other hand started to move up onto your hip.

You could feel your body becoming warmer as you moved your hips up to try and meet him.

Noah ran his tongue up your thigh once more and then he moved his head so he could then press his tongue onto your folds and licked your entrance slowly but firmly, causing you to let out a low moan of relief.

Your thighs started to close in slightly around Noah’s head as he continued to eat you out, it was passionate and it was almost like he wanted to saver every last second. That was the one thing about your husband, he loved making you feel amazing.

Noah moved his mouth up and you felt him run his fingers down until he slipped one in, the stretch of his fingers alone always felt amazing to you, you could only imagine what was coming.

“That feels really nice”

Noah hummed into your core as he found a steady rhythm with his hand while his continued to use his tongue on your clit, the pressure in your stomach was getting stronger, your body was starting to move on it’s on accord, your back arching off the bed and your hands held onto the back of his head and his hair, not being able to resist running your fingers through it.

But you knew you needed more, you wanted more.

“Noah…”

Noah instantly stopped what he was doing and lifted his head up, looking almost worried that he’d done something wrong.

“Are you ok? Do you want me to stop?”

You shook your head.

“No, I need you now please, I don’t want to wait anymore”

Noah gave you one last kiss and slipped his fingers out, the sound of how wet you were reaching your ears. Noah quickly took off the rest of his clothes and you saw how hard he’d become already.

Noah stayed between your legs and slide himself up so he was hovering over you, his chain swinging above your chest as he did.

You reached up one of your hands to his face and brought him down for a kiss while he lined himself up.

“Are you absolutely sure about this?”

You smiled and let out a small giggle before you responded with “yes I’m ready…so can you please fuck me now?”

Noah’s smile instantly hit his eyes as his head fell into your neck as he laughed.

“That I can do Mrs Davis”

Leaning down to kiss you again, you felt him start to push himself inside you. You felt an instant burn as he stretched you out, it had been a long time since you’d had anything bigger than his fingers inside but it felt wonderful.

You closed your eyes and groaned into his neck as you felt him slide in fully, Noah himself not being able to control his own moans.

“Oh my…you feel more incredible then I ever could have imagined”

Noah kept his arms caged around your head and shoulders and he started to move his hips, the feeling of being so full and turned on was almost too much.

The emotions you felt were borderline overwhelming, you felt so loved and safe and you knew that Noah had you.

You brought your legs up to wrap around his hips as he moved faster, a layer of sweat was forming over both your bodies and you tried to move you hips with him, starting to feel desperate for a release but at the same time, you never wanted this moment to end.

“Shit, it’s like you were made for me…you’re so fucking perfect” his praise caused you to clench around him more causing his hips to jolt slightly as he groaned into your neck.

“Do you like when I praise you baby? Because you’re doing so good for me right now, my perfect wife”

You felt the tears hot in the corners of your eyes, it was everything you dreamed of and more, you felt your high starting to build, your stomach muscles were becoming tense and you felt the need to try and move your hips against him.

“Noah…please…I need…”

Your words got lost in your throat as Noah thrusted his hips harder, he knew exactly what you needed.

“You want to cum for me angel?”

You gripped your hands onto his back, no doubt leaving nail marks in the process.

“Yes!”

Noah pulled his body away ever so slightly and reached his hand down to start rubbing hard, fast circles on your clit, not once breaking the movements of his hips slamming into yours.

“Come on angel, cum for me, I want to feel all of you”

You felt your stomach twist tightly until you felt a snap and your orgasm washed over you, your body shaking and arching up into Noah’s as your head fell back onto the pillow with a cry. Noah thrusted hard into you a few more times before you felt him empty himself inside you and his body weight came down onto yours.

You tried to catch your breath as Noah kept his face resting in the crook of your neck, his breath hot on your skin. Noah didn’t pull out and you kept your legs loosely hooked around his waist, not wanting to feel empty just yet, you needed him to stay.

Once he brought his head up, he stared into your eyes lovingly.

“Are you ok?”

You smiled a very content smile and nodded back, feeling another tear slide down your cheek.

“Yes, that was amazing, I felt so good. Thank you for waiting for me”

Noah brought his hand up to your face to gently caress your cheek and gave you a soft, tender kiss.

“I would wait forever for you angel”

[kdogreads]

Y/n is close with Abby like the mom figure to Gibbs being her dad figure. Gibbs and y/n have only ever had words in passing They are always friendly with a flirt now and then. One day Gibbs uses Abby's cot to get some rest he wakes up to y/n and Abby talking about blind dates.

"Y/n I'm gonna find you a companion in life. Just do one more date"

*y/n sighs* "I'm just not the type of person people are looking for and that's ok"

*as she leaves the lab* "Abs some people are ment to be alone"

Gibbs comes out telling Abby that he will be taking y/n on the next date.

This is such a sweet idea!! I’m sticking it with this request bc I feel like they just fit together so perfectly. I hope that’s okay by both of you 🥹 thank you so much for the love!

Jethro Gibbs x f!reader

TW: alcohol, a smidge of angst (reader thinks she’ll be forever alone), mostly just a heap of fluff

A/N: I’ve never been able to use any of my nerdy lab knowledge in a fic before so sorry if I went a little overboard lmao (I’m a pre-analytical training coordinator and spend my days teaching people to be labbies basically). Thank you so so so much for reading! ❤️

Just before you left for the day, you decided to head down to the lab check in on Abby. It was quality control week, meaning she had to got to run test patients on all of her instruments, confirm the results are what they should be, order biological indicator tests to make sure no foreign bacteria snuck its way in where it shouldn’t have, then do it all over again a dozen or so times to make sure the results match up.

Not that Abby is anything less than capable of completing the quarterly checks, it just gets very tedious, and Abby is not a fan of busy work.

“Hey Abs,” You greeted her sweetly.

“There is no Abby, only QC’s,” She quipped back in her best robot voice.

You only chuckled in response and grabbed a pair of gloves without another word. You started resulting the tests in her queue, a feeble attempt to help the boring task move along faster.

The two of you worked quietly on opposite sides of the lab for another half hour until you moved the last tube into the “finished” tray.

“Wanna grab some dinner?” You questioned, removing your gloves and heading over to the sink to wash your hands.

“No, thanks; already ate,” Abby responded without looking up from her work, “Hey! How did that date go last night? I can’t believe I forgot until now! Tell me everything.”

Abby turned towards you excitedly, her eyes bright and body fidgeting in anticipation. You swear she was more invested in your love life than you were sometimes.

You started to shake your head “no” and Abby let out a loud groan.

“Ugh! I had such a good feeling about this one,” She spoke in disappointment.

“You said that the last time, too, Abs,” You leaned against the counter and crossed your arms lazily, “He asked me to meet his mom. On the first date!”

Abby visibly cringed and put a hand lovingly on your bicep.

“I’m gonna find you a companion, I swear it!”

You let out a sound that’s half laugh, half sigh before you speak, “It’s okay, really. I’m just not the type of person anyone is looking for, and I can’t find the person I’m looking for. It’s just the way it is, Abby.”

She sent you a sympathetic look, squeezing your arm in reassurance. Abby pulled you into a tight hug, like she was trying to will a new love life into you with her bare hands.

You sent her a loving smile when she finally pulled away from you.

“Well, I’m gonna head out. You sure I can’t drag you away for something to eat?”

“No, no. I have too much to get done,” She motions to the empty tubes behind her, “Don’t lose hope, Boss Lady. Your perfect man is out there.”

You headed towards the door before turning around to tell her goodbye, “Some people are just meant to be alone. It’ll be me and the dogs forever,” You smiled slightly, “Goodnight, Abs.”

You made it almost out the door of the NCIS building before you realized you left your purse in the lab. With a huff, you begrudgingly dragged yourself back into the elevator, down to the lab, and right up to the doorway. The surprise of two distinct voices coming from within stopped you in your tracks.

“Gibbs! You can’t sneak up on me like that! I didn’t know you were using the cot.”

“Sorry, Abs. You often set her up on blind dates?”

“Yes! I am determined to find my wonderful boss’ soulmate somewhere in the greater DC area.”

Jethro chuckles.

“I can’t believe I didn’t see it before now! She’s just your type, Gibbs, and she’s so fun and cryptic just like you and—“

“Abby,” He paused, “Way ahead of you.”

You decided now was your chance. Knocking gently on the doorframe, both of them turned their heads to see who was there.

“Hey Abby; Jethro,” You smiled, trying not to act like you just heard their whole conversation about you, “I just, uh, left my purse.”

Abby looked around and spotted your bag, handing it to you with a cheeky grin on her face. You all stood there in semi-uncomfortable silence for a beat before Gibbs spoke.

“Have any plans tomorrow night, Red?”

You straightened up a bit at his question and the playful nickname. You are just his type.

“Um, no. I don’t. Not yet, anyway.” You tried to keep an even tone, but the nerves and excitement were practically seeping out of your pours.

“My place, 7 o’clock,” Gibbs said in his nonchalant tone, “Casual. Hope you like bourbon.”

He winked at you and walked out of the lab before you could even exhale the breathe you hadn’t known you were holding. You looked at Abby, your eyes wider than ever before.

“Eee! I’m so excited!” Abby squeals and flings her arms around you.

You couldn’t even put any thoughts together. Your heart pounded out of your chest and your hands must’ve been shaking, the adrenaline of the situation just starting to wear off.

“Come on,” Abby said while sliding her jacket off the back of her chair, “I’ll finish up tomorrow. We have to plan your date. With Gibbs!”

You let out a laugh and wrapped an arm over Abby’s shoulders, heading out to grab something to eat.

You nervously sifted through your tops, trying to find something that felt “casual,” as Jethro had requested, but still nice enough for a date.

Oh screw it.

You grabbed a plain olive green hoodie, the big white letters reading NCIS. You figured if he asked for casual, he would get casual.

The drive to Gibbs’ house went quickly. You’d been there once before, when Abby insisted Gibbs needed company one New Year’s Eve. You didn’t end up staying very long, but he left an impression on you. After the visit, Gibbs started stopping to say “hello” in the hallways at work, or bringing a coffee up your office every now and then.

One detail you remembered from your brief visit is the front door was never locked, so you didn’t bother to stop and knock.

Walking through the doorway, your eyes immediately gravitated to the only light on in the house — the one leading down the stairs to the basement. You took this as your sign to invite yourself downstairs.

The stairs creaked slightly as you made your way down, the sounds of sandpaper meeting wood filled your ears.

“You found the place,” Jethro’s strong voice greeted you as you stepped into his workspace.

“How could I forget?” You teased back.

Jethro let out a honey-soaked chuckle and offered you a stool to sit on. He poured you two fingers out of his half-empty bottle of bourbon, then did the same for himself. He tipped his glass to you and you tapped yours against it with a slight clink.

You shut your eyes as the amber liquid burned down your throat. Instinctively, you leaned back against the counter and let out an exhale.

“Long day?” Jethro joked, but you could see the genuine care when you opened your eyes to meet his gaze.

“Long week,” You responded before taking another sip, “Abby’s up to her eyeballs in evidence to examine, plus all this QC crap takes so much time. I just feel bad I can’t help her more. I didn’t realize taking the lead forensics position would take me out of the lab so much.”

Jethro nodded in understanding, one corner of his mouth tilting up slightly as he poured more into your already empty cup.

“Abby’s the best of the best,” He said with confidence, placing a hand reassuringly on your knee, “She’ll get it done.”

You smiled and nodded back at him, placing your hand over his as a silent thank you.

You were surprised when Jethro broke the comfortable silence first.

“You know she thinks the world of you, Red,” He said with a look in his eye, one that almost looked like pride if you had to guess.

You felt your cheeks get hot and you looked down at your shoes, unsure if the liquor or his sweet comment made you blush.

You took another sip before lifting your head back up and responding.

“Same goes for you, Jethro,” You reached out to grab the hand that rested on your knee just moments before, “I think if she had time to write a book about how much she adores you, she would.”

He laughed, a full laugh, glazed in honey and bourbon and it warmed you to your core. You thought that sound could end wars, cause the devil himself to crack a smile. You would have melted right there if he didn’t jolt you out of your trance a moment later.

He took the glass from your hand and whispered a quick, “c’mere.”

He took your hand and led you over to the boat he was building. He showed you a few small hand tools and gave you a quick explanation of their use.

Before long, his hands were resting over yours, your back pressed gently against his chest as he showed you the different sanding techniques he used. Though every inch of his body was pressed against yours, you’d never felt so free, so held and yet, so comfortable.

It was a quiet few minutes before he spoke, his lips inches from your ear.

“You ever done this before?” His breath tickled your neck and sent a shiver down your spine.

“Never,” You breathed, trying your hardest not to just melt into his strong arms.

“You’re a natural then.”

He slowly peeled his hands back from yours, allowing you to keep sanding on your own for a moment. You felt his strong hands slide down your arms, your sides, before settling on your hips.

Your eyelids fluttered, suddenly aware of the effect he had on you. Your movements halted and Jethro raised a hand cautiously to your chin, turning your head to face him.

“This okay?” He questioned gently, a worried look settled into his furrowed brows.

You didn’t answer immediately. Instead, turning your whole body to face his, your arms sliding over his broad shoulders to rest at the back of his neck.

“Only if you intend to kiss me, Jethro,” His name danced from your lips in a whisper.

A soft smile spread across his face, the worry melting away in an instant.

“Yes, ma’am, I do.”

Before you could comprehend, the hand that was still on your chin drifted to hold you just below your ear, and his lips melted into yours in a sweet, slow kiss.

He tasted of bourbon and something you were sure was just distinctly him.

You leaned further into him as your lips met over and over again. His presence wasn’t demanding, but invasive. You felt Jethro in every inch of your body; his taste, his smell, the way his fingers gripped into your hip like he was afraid you might disappear if he let go.

The seconds felt like hours before you separated your lips, both of you desperate for oxygen. Your chest heaved slightly as he drew small circles onto your lower back absentmindedly; his forehead leaning down to rest on yours.

“Do you bring all the girls down here and make out like teenagers?” You teased, still slightly out of breathe.

He threw his head back in another honey-glazed laugh. It invaded your sense just as his kiss had.

God, you though, I could listen to that forever.

“No,” He huffed, a wide smile still spread across his face, “Only the special ones.”

“Ohh,” You exaggerated, “So I’m special, then?”

He only growled an Mmmhhmm before his lips pressed into yours once more, this time slightly quicker than the time before.

“Hungry?” He asked simply, prying his lips from yours, a slight groan falling from your lips as he pulled away.

“Starving,” You replied without missing a beat.

He raised an eyebrow and leaned slightly further away from you, letting him see your full expression.

“For food, sweetheart,” He jested, a hint of teasing in his voice.

“I know!” You squeaked, swatting his shoulder playfully in protest.

He chuckled that charming laugh and nodded his head towards the stairs.

“Well, come on then,” He spoke after pressing a quick peck to your lips.

You followed Jethro upstairs where you enjoyed a delicious homemade dinner and spend the rest of the evening basking in each other’s company.

You sighed as you reached the top of the stairs, just outside your office. Since you rarely locked the door, you turned the handle and swung it open. You were surprised to see the light already switched on. A pit formed in your stomach as your eyes scanned the room before—

“Jesus, Abby!” You found her sitting at your desk chair, literally shaking in anticipation, “You almost gave me a heart attack!”

“Sorry, I’m sorry,” She quickly approached you, taking your bag out of your hand and setting it down in the desk, “Sooo? I’m dying to know! Tell me everything!”

“Ab,” You smiled at her an tilted your head slightly in a playful manner, “A girl should never kiss and tell.”

Abby squealed in excitement and pulled you into a hug, clearly understanding that it went well enough for you to kiss him.

“Please tell me you’re seeing him again. Please, please, please,” She practically begged with her hand folded in front of her.

“Tomorrow, after work,” You smiled as she squealed and pulled you into another excited hug.

“This is the best day ever!” She declared and sat in the comfy chair across from your desk, determined to get all the details from your life-changing first date with Jethro Gibbs.

[sashi-ya]

東京 NIGHTS mini event

𝑭𝑶𝑼𝑹 𝑯𝑼𝑵𝑫𝑹𝑬𝑫 𝑺𝑻𝑬𝑷𝑺ㅤㅤㅤㅤ 𓂃 ࣪˖ ichigo kurosaki x f! reader

⤹˚ synopsis. adult! ichigo takes you to a winter date to the tokyo tower, climb the steps by his hand, let him guide you the sky.

requested by: @cofeedaifuku ➡ Hello! It has been a really long time since I last requested, so I’m a little shy, but knowing that you are the one that is going to receive it calms me down. Can I request Adult! Ichigo with the prompt to see the tokyo tower at night? Nsfw, female reader she/her, (I’m really bad with requests so I don’t know if I should describe the details of the ask, but in any case, something like Ichigo just loves his s/o so much and he just looks at her and completely loses control. Please ignore this if it is not the case.) tw: MDNI. slight nsfw. adult! ichigo. masturbation through the clothes. wc: 1.7k masterlist

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤHis hand feels warm, powerful too. ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤYour hand, in his, feels tiny… protected.

“Can you make some time for me?” that’s how he asked; Ichigo had red apples for cheeks when he did. Your eyes shined like five-point stars; you waited for him to ask you out since forever…

Through the cold streets of Tokyo, the frosting sound beneath your feet sound like cracking. The trees, all of them decorated with silver fairy lights. A gleaming spectacle to the eyes, contrasting with the visible glooming cold of December.

Christmas is right around the corner; the streets are busier than ever. People carry big bags with gifts during a Saturday night, but both of you aren’t buying stuff.

“Have you ever been to the Tokyo tower during winter?” Ichigo asks, stuttering. For some reason, he can be a totally different man when it comes to be all alone with you.

“I never been there during the winter season! I am excited to see the lights!” you chime, so happy your heart could jump out of your chest. Spending time alone with him feels like a dream come true.

Ichigo smiles softly, his eyes flutter to the ground in sign of happiness but still total shyness. “I am glad I chose a good spot, then” he murmurs, scratching the back of his head.

You nod, with a lovely beam. You wish to tell him any spot with him would be perfect, but what if it’s too much? What if it’s not proper?

As you wait for the light street to turn to green, he fidgets with his fingers. His eyes are fixed on your hanging hand, the ginger man is dying to hold it.

You notice, and internally giggle. You help him, letting your sleeve slightly go up. There is no point on acting more shy than him.

Soon enough -or at least right when the red light turns to green- Ichigo snatches your hand. It’s not delicate, it is clumsy but definitely dominant, the way he grabs you and pulls you through the crowd.

Your eyes shine brightly with the lights all around, and the wind plays with your hair looking like the typical shoujo scenes.

Your sight wanders and lands on the freckled cheeks of the strawberry boy; a little blush garnishes his skin, but he has that look of fearless man you know too well. He has decided to stop being shy, to finally get what he came to gain.

A few more steps and your eyes get blessed by the imponent look of the Tokyo Tower in front of you. The red metallic pieces now shine lights of different silver shades. And as you look up, a halo of cold mist surrounds its upper levels.

“Beautiful” you murmur, causing in Ichigo to gasp and look right into your eyes.

“You… you are…” he mumbles, immediately looking away with long orange lashes that cast beautiful shadows over his galaxy cheeks.

You bite your lower lip with a smile, how cute…

“Let’s hurry up, or we aren’t gonna be able to get there before it closes” he tells you, pulling you softly towards the entrance where a man kindly scans the Qr codes from different tickets. You nod and follow him, never once letting you go from your hand.

Once inside, while most of the people decide to take the elevator, both of you chose to climb the 600 steps of the outside stairs. It’s a lot more magical to see the lights of the city as you go up, even if the cold air may seem painful to your lungs. But you don’t care, and neither does he.

You follow him, with the sound of your feet hitting the metallic steps and the heart pumping as hard as them. The more you climb, the more beautiful the city looks beneath your feet.

Ichigo turns around to look at you from time to time, and he is smiling preciously. A beam that he rarely has on his face, but that is big enough to make his brown eyes squint.

The first checkpoint gets cleared, 200 steps in. Then the second one, this time with a little more difficulty. 400 steps, laughing and almost running are a lot more than what your body is used to. However, you want to keep going, but you definitely need to catch some air first.  

“Wai-wait Ichigo” you giggle, taking some deep breath of humid cold air through your mouth.

“Oh… sorry, I- I didn’t mean to make you run that much- I…” he excuses himself, watching you with guilty puppy eyes.

You simply laugh. It is more than okay. If you wanna keep up with him, you need to train. He is an amazing substitute Shinigami, and not only that but the stronger ever made; the least you can do is to be able to climb some steps fast enough to catch up with him.

“No worries Kurosaki-kun. I just needed a little bit of air; let’s go” you rush to keep climbing, even if you are clearly not recuperated still. Your head is a little bit dizzy, your legs a little weak.

You try to walk towards him, but you feel like everything around turns dark for some seconds. And Ichigo notices right away.

“(Name)? are you ok?” he urges you for an answer while his arms surround your tired body with his protective embrace.

You would lie if you said you were feeling bad; after all Ichigo is now hugging you. Nothing could go wrong.

“I am fine… I just got a little lightheaded” you whisper, looking up at him. Your nose barely grazing the sharp jaw of the Shinigami. Looking how his Adam’s apple move as he swallows in clear sign of nervousness.

And even if you wanted to move away from his arms, you couldn’t as he kept pulling you closer, tightly against his chest.

The scent of his soft perfume mixed with the one his winter skin has, reminds you how much you desire him. You want him, you want to praise him, and you also want his lips against your lips.

“Please, rest for some minutes more…” he mumbles, this time delicately pushing your head towards his chest. “You need to breathe calmly…” he continues, enjoying perhaps a lot more than he should the closeness of your skin against his.

You don’t dare to argue; you don’t want to. You just want for him to hug you so eternally, and even after too. You nod, nuzzled in the little crook that his prominent collar bones form in the middle of his chest. The little patch of visible skin in between his scarf and white big coat, is all you need to rest assure for the rest of your life.

His hand slowly goes down to the small of your back; his touch is not indecent, it is caring and loving and despite that, the sexual tension in between both of you is undeniable.

You place your ear on his chest, letting yourself go with the song of his beating heart… allowing yours to beat in perfect synchronicity with it. Your eyes open, and they get filled by the view of a city that never seems to sleep, with neon lights flashing all over long, long streets.

Ichigo does the same, both look through the metallic red protective net for some minutes until a little white fluff falling from the sky catches your attention.

“It’s snowing…” you whisper, snaking your arms around his waist. “How beautiful, it is the first one this year”

“Yes…” Ichigo sighs, with trembling voice and reiatsu growing stronger inside the very core of his body. He is gaining strength, or perhaps thinking carefully about his next actions… what he is about to do, might change the destiny of both.

You know it too; when it’s right, you just know…

“Ichigo, I…” you murmur, looking up at him with your eyes plastered on his lips. Giving him the permission to kiss you once, and as many times as he want.

With the same hand he wields his zanpakuto to protect, he now grabs your chin and rather desperately kisses your lips. When your mouths crash against the other, both let some air scape your lungs, living off each other’s souls. More and more, deepening the kiss, melting into one.

The light show of the tower, the last of tonight, begins. Nobody seems to notice you two, neither you notice the lasers blinking through the heavy atmosphere of cold and snowflakes falling.

His hands, this time pooling in the small of your back in concupiscent intention, pulls you closer than ever before. You notice how much of a man he has become; grown up to be stronger and also to be sexier, mature, extremely attractive.

Your belly, feeling the hardness growing in between Ichigo’s winter clothes. Your legs, quivering as his tongue plays with yours in wet, lustful kiss.

The loud songs coming from inside, accompanying the light spectacle, letting your moans to be unheard by the rest as his hands slips so needy in between your tights from under your flannel skirt.

Ichigo’s fingertips get wet, as they rub against your stockings. You shiver and jolt, as he presses right in the spot. The graze of the tights and panties on your clit makes you whine louder into his mouth. A moan he eats so pleased, so hectically.

“I-Ichigo… I….” you stutter, so close to the very first climax of the night… just by the simple touch of his hands with your clothes still on.

“I know… I know… I am sorry, I couldn’t stop myself no more…” he sighs, kissing your forehead but never stopping the circular motions on your core. “I just love you so damn much, (Name)…” he finally confesses, breathing your last moan before you could melt right there, into a mess of sexual desire unleashed and pleased.

“I… I am… Ichigo…” “I know, let’s go back to the hotel… I wouldn’t like you catching a cold, we can come back tomorrow…It was a good idea to come all the way from Karakura town to Tokyo with you 💖~”

[mar3ggiata]

professional help, c32. I want to speak in code.

simon riley x original character.

trigger warnings: violence, sexual assault, mentions of rape, trauma, sexual themes, swearing, use of alcohol and drugs, EDs and death.

song to listen to when reading this: Tu non mi basti mai, Lucio Dalla.

abstract: Judeeee, how are you doing??? Things are moving, even me and Simon, we're getting closer, what could go wrong? Spending this much time together, it's almost like we're a thing now. And who would have thought really, things change so fast and when you least expect it!

She had ballet, that was why she was looking at the time on her phone, she was late. Simon knew cause he went to see her, I'm not even gonna lie and pretend like he wasn't already planning on speaking to her. He knew where to find her, because, again, he knew her. He missed her. For the Al-Jareena mission he felt like he had access to her knowledge and her theories before the others, like he was, well, special. They spoke about it several times on several different occasions, and he liked it. He liked she knew what she was talking about, he liked she gave him her opinions on conflicts and politics. It wasn't the same with this, he hardly ever saw her anymore. He guessed she was busy with her counselling sessions, and ballet. When he saw her in the listening post room he really started to understand how hard that listening task was. Maybe she was tired, did she need help with the dog? He would have helped if he knew she was struggling. Maybe she had someone else helping her, that was the thing. He missed knowing what her days looked like, he missed hearing her voice and listening to her stories. His teammates struggled to leave him alone after finding out he knew her real name. He felt bad he told them, he felt like a complete idiot.

They left the listening post room after that briefing they had and went back to the hangar, they kept asking why him. Why did she choose him to disclose her identity to? And it almost amused him really, they were joking that he wasn't the type to get friendly with strangers, Gaz had confessed he asked her name multiple times and he was annoyed she never told him. He almost smiled at the thought under his mask. He started to feel good about himself, now that they were really making him think about the situation in that perspective. She chose him. If they only knew, he thought. We went to dinner, she told me all her theories and speculations, we walked her dog, we went out for New Years, we ate meals together, I have seen her dance, I know many things about her, not just her name. I saw her dressed in a leotard and tights, in her comfy sweatpants, with a skirt on for New Years, with jeans and a blouse, I saw her hair in a bun, falling on her shoulders, I saw her with glittery eye makeup, I saw her without make up even… That was why he decided to look for her one more time. In some way, he felt like she would have been happy to see him, no? Plus, he had a present for her.

'It was good, believe me. We're done'. She sat down on the floor in front of Blake, her dance partner. She was panting, her right foot probably bleeding. She looked up at him, 'We can try one more time, I can lower my arms faster…' He chucked at her attempt to control her breath and speak up. 'It was good, Alba, don't worry.' She felt like crying, again. She stretched out her leg, and massaged her aching muscles. 'We can move to another choreo next week. I'm sick of Arabian anyway.' He started to pack up his bag in the corner, they made small talk about the kids she was teaching. She stayed on the floor, stretching. He knew she was gonna stay at the school at least another 30 minutes to rehearse by herself, that was why she wasn't leaving with him. He approached her and have her a squeeze on her arm. Don't be too late, he said. She thanked him and said goodnight.

Finally alone, she finished stretching, her legs straight in front of her, her forehead connected to her knees. She got up, she looked like a ghost. Her leotards was blue today, black tights, no skirt. She walked around the room, watching her reflection in the mirror. Her arms looked lean, skinny. Her legs felt heavy, she felt bloated, hips too wide. Thighs too big, not strong enough. Maybe Rachel Montana was right, you know, maybe she was too fat to be Snow Queen, to be a ballerina even. You had pasta for lunch and it shows… She fixed her leotard strap on her shoulder and tapped her foot two times on the floor, a weird routine she had before dancing. Arms in third position, she got ready to turn. That's when Simon knocked on the door frame, making her jump. Like the first time he went to see her when she was alone, she swore in Italian. Hands pressed to her chest, she looked at him in complete shock, her chest raising rapidly. 'For fuck's sake! You need to stop this, what is wrong with you?' Her eyes wide, she took a step back from him. He smiled. 'Sorry.' He said. 'Ma che cazzo…' she mumbled. It was getting almost repetitive, seeing him at the ballet school. He had been so many times he looked like he knew her hours almost. She felt a strange pressure on her chest, seeing him untie his shoes like she told him to do weeks ago, before stepping inside the room. He seemed strangely relaxed, he seemed like he was just visiting a friend at work, like he had done a million times. She stood there, without knowing what to do with herself. He didn't approach her, just a small, shy step in her direction.

'You're dancing with that guy?' he finally asked.

She shrugged her shoulders. 'He plays the prince.'

'The prince?'

'In the Nutcracker.'

He nodded. Silence filled the room. She felt goosebumps on her arms, she realised how cold the room was cause she stopped dancing and she was sweaty.

'…so you're the princess?'

She smiled. It was the most genuine smile she ever gave him.

'I am the Arabian Coffee Princess…' she revealed in a soft tone, putting one leg behind the other, '…and Snow Queen.'

'Aah, princess and queen…' he nodded. She could see the wrinkles around his eyes. He was smiling. She bit the inside of her cheek awkwardly.

'A senior dancer got injured, so I'm covering her roles.' She explained.

'I thought you were a teacher.' She moved to the other side of the room, where her bag was sitting. He took a glance at the mirrors that were covering the entire wall on his right. He looked terribly out of place, black sweater, jeans, a heavy jacket, black mask. The fact that he wasn't wearing any shoes made him look human, like he was just a guy in his socks. He felt like his presence darkened the room. She, on the other side of the room, was barely dressed. She was putting on a black wrap top, maybe she was getting cold. She bent down to reach for it in her bag, exposing him to the back of her legs, her hamstrings stretching at the motion. He tried to look away. 'I'm dancing as well this year', she was saying. He had to pretend like he wasn't staring at her chest, while she was fixing the sweater on her waist. Maybe that was why he always visited her at ballet, to catch her when she was wearing little to no clothes. He could see her tattoos, he could memorise them. He could see the colour of her skin through the fabric of the tights. He could see her figure, her hips, her arms and legs now that they weren't hidden by jeans. She was small, she looked defenceless. 'When's the show?' He asked. She was still busy with her bag, she was turned to the side, he let his gaze travel down her spine to her ass. She said it was in March. 'How much are the tickets?' He kept going, but to that question she raised her eyes at him. She was flustered after rehearsals and her cheeks were a pretty rose colour he wanted to have imprinted in his mind. She looked at him like a deer in headlights. 'Uhm… 20$ I think.' Her tone of voice was gentle and polite, sweet like honey. 20$ wasn't that much. March she had said, he was probably free. He could go see her. Maybe. At the theatre, or wherever.

'So, why are you here?' She changed the subject, akwardly.

He blinked a few times, trying to find an appropriate answer.

'I have something for you.'

She tilted her head to the side, her chest tightening. She let go of the fabric of the sweater to push her hair behind her ears. He reached behind his back, he had a backpack which she hadn't noticed. It wasn't full, probably carrying something small. She watched him open it and pull out a single envelope. Is it a present, is it a letter? She took a step towards him. 'I thought you wanted to see it before everyone else.' She narrowed her eyes, taking the envelope he was handing her. They were standing closer, he slightly bent foreword to look at her confused expression. He let his gaze travel on her body, now that she was this close. Her fingers, fiddling with the paper. Her collarbones, the fabric of the leotard on her chest. Her ribcage moving at each breath she took. He looked at the was she was gently swaying from side to side, pointe shoes at her feet, tiny ribbons adorning her calves. She let out a gasp when she realised what she was looking at, making him focus back on her face. She raised her head, her wide eyes finding his. 'Is this the original?' She asked, whispering almost like it was a secret. He nodded, amused at her reaction. 'We received it thirty minutes ago.' He kept his tone as soft as he could, he sounded like he was talking to a child. 'Wait…' she took a step back, to relieve her neck from having to look up at him, '… fingerprints, DNA…' God, you are so so so smart, Alba. You always think about everything, this is why Laswell likes you, I get it now. He smirked under his mask, even if she couldn't see him. 'Already covered it, you can touch it.'

She smiled. It was the code they heard about thought Madison, the secret code from Serbia. Apparently, they all received this paper message and the two undercover agents were able to send them one of the copies full of details, fingerprints, DNA. And, most importantly, the infamous code. 'Am I the first one to see this?' She asked, he nodded. He felt weird, he had felt nervous from the moment he decided to sneak off base with classified evidence to bring her. It wasn't exactly legal, and Price was gonna be pissed, he had probably found out already. And he knew by now, when he went missing it was probably cause he was with Alba. Seeing her like this, however… It made it worth it. His heart was beating at a way faster pace he had ever experienced during any mission. 'I thought…' he thought about the correct way of phrasing that, well, he had stole that key piece of evidence from the lab to have her look at it before the others. 'I thought you… maybe wanted to have a look at it before your colleagues?'

She let her mouth fall open and covered it with her palm. 'You stole this?' she whispered. She was smiling, her eyes glistening. 'I borrowed it.' He replied, his tone low and muffled by the mask. The things I would do for you... Before he knew it, he was sat down on the shiny floor of the room, legs crossed in front of him. She was sitting beside him, still in her pretty ballet outfit, her legs gracefully bent to the side. She placed the paper in front of them. The message itself, at first glance, could look like a group of letters. An anagram, at best.

B, A, C, V, K, O, C…

She counted the letters, 7 columns, 9 lines. A total of 63. The letters were cut out of a news paper, each individually placed in perfect line with each other. All different sizes, all different fonts, some capital letters, some not. They got to work, in the corner of the room. She handed him a blank sheet of paper, she had a notebook for her choreos, and a pen from her bag. She instructed him to write down the capital letters. 'A… K… L, then…uhm…' her eyes were moving on the code, scanning for details, anything that could make sense. 'E, right here.' He pointed out, and she resumed her task. 'E, S…' They looked for a secret message in the uppercase letters, but with no luck. 'Read it backwards.' He suggested, ready to write the message from the end to the top. He was strangely getting into this investigative task. Especially because he was doing it with her at his side. The letters didn't form a phrase when read backwards. She suggested they read them in diagonal lines, the clever girl you are, Alba. He sighed with his paper full of letters and weird scriptures. She had stretched her legs in front of her and was letting out a yawn. He thought he'd ask her to go, since it was late and she probably had work in the morning. 'Honey would have figured it out by now', she commented. He scoffed, 'Is Honey the one with glasses or the one that looks like a rat?' She scoffed, a tilted smile. 'Roman doesn't look like a rat.'

'Whot, you like him or something?'

He registered what he said and it was too late to bite his tongue. That came out wrong. She smiled, her look fierce and proud, like she had figured out the real reason why he was there. Cause he liked her. Really much. So, did she like someone else?

'Would you have a problem with that?' She teased. Her voice was low, it travelled on his skin like warm water, it bathed him and made it impossible for him to look away from her eyes.

'It's not my business.' He was able to breath out.

She bit her lip, not happy with his answer, and debated asking him to be more precise. She looked at the strings of his sweater, against his chest. She looked at the skin of his neck, smooth and glowing under the cold lights of the room. He was pale. She looked at his thighs, the fabric of his jeans tight around his hips. His hands, one of them was fidgeting with the letter 'S' on the paper. She got closer, brushing his hand away with her own. 'Don't do that…' she urged him not to ruin the character glued to the paper. A small part of it was starting to come off. Peel off. She raised her eyes to meet his gaze, his blonde eyelashes fluttering slightly at how close she had gotten when touching his hand. He had to remind himself to breathe, her face being so close, he could reach for her cheek, he could fix her hair out of her face.

'Maybe it is', she murmured, 'You're the one sitting here with me after all…' her eyes travelled on his features, exploring the skin of his forehead, adorned with a white scar on the right side, his eyes, a deep chocolate blue. 'Why are you here, Simon?' She repeated. He felt shivers down his spine, tingles though his whole body. Did she want him to confess? He came to see her cause he wanted to, and what was gonna be her reaction to that? She was gonna think he was being creepy? Would she reject him? He stayed silent, his breathing getting heavier, his eyes locked in with her own.

'I think we should go, it's getting late', she interrupted the racing of his mind. He fucked up the moment. Again.

He got up while she put shoes on, he mumbled something about bringing the envelope to the listening post to analyse. 'Have you eaten?' He asked, he was fixing his jeans, she got her bag on her shoulder. 'Uhm… I'll eat at home, I have to take Jinx out for a walk.' There it was, rejection. He felt sorry for himself, but what was he expecting? A romantic affaire with the pretty therapist everyone liked? Please… 'Don't be too late.' He commented. She stood by the side of her car, watching him leave with his head down.

'Simon.' She called. He stopped, she didn't even need to raise her voice for him to turn around, looking at her like a lost puppy. 'I'll see you tomorrow at work, yeah?' She tilted her head, a sincere smile.

'Sure, Alba.'

notes: sweeeet sweet things. will they end up together?

taglist:

@ghostlythots @sweetfemmefatal @natxpat @chavarriakeren647 @ravenmoore14 @farther-than-pleiades @internallyscreamings @hwromi @atoxicrat @cuti3maddi3 @deafeningkittenblaze @its-celeste @serene-hills @lexidoll12 @poohkie90 @lunatiquess

@warmedbythebody @katzykat @iristhemuse @azkza @keiraslayz @abbyandermine @jennyjencakes @dest-nai @corset-briefs @nutze-kekse @ilytsukiw @b3anspr0ut

@pondsblog @missyouzoe @fallenkitten @bigauthorrascalturkey @bethtay @angelynn-nicole @starluv @stargirlisworld @giyuuslittleslut @impossiblecupcakelight

@rkrivees-blog @ghosts-hoe @kam1snotverysmart @gauky76 @freyjaaasstuff @spicyspicyliving @scottpilgrimvsmyfists @courtney0-0 @shinchanboi @darling006 @my-therapist-hates-me

[henrioo]

Hey! Could I please request some fluffy scenarios about Shanks X Male and Mihawk X Male Reader (separately if that's okay) who's love languages are physical touch and quality time, but is also struggling with anxiety? Sorry for going on anon, this is my first time ever requesting and I'm a little nervous lol

°•*⁀➷ TOO MUCH LOVE, TOO MANY THOUGHTS : SHANKS AND MIHAWK

꒰ SYNOPSIS ꒱ : You love your partners, you really do, but sometimes those voices inside you gain control over your body, making you withdraw into your own fears and feelings. Good for you that your partners won't give up on having you by their side.

꒰ WARNINGS ꒱ : MALE! READER, M! READER, NOT POLY! The reader can be Trans or Cis, talking about homophobia but nothing happens, a lot of talk about insecurities in a romantic relationship, talk about anxiety and fear

꒰ WC ꒱ : 2,4k at all, 1k for Shanks and 1,4 for Mihawk

꒰ NOTES ꒱ : Hey thanks for this request! It had been some months and I don't have any idea if you are still there but anyway thanks for that, that request is part of the first ask I received when I opened for male reader so this means a lot to me. The ask doesn't talk too much about the insecurities of the reader because I wanted that you guys could imagine your own, here talk more about how they would handle and help you. Enjoy!

★彡 Shanks

It may not seem like it, but the redhead is a master at reading people, all it takes is a few nervous glances and body language and he knows exactly what the problem is.

However, while he knows what the problem is, he is not that good at knowing the best solution for it. Part of him just wants to grab you and say "stop with that and let's just kiss." Luckily he knows that not everyone works like him, so he is able to understand that you may have different limits and such a direct approach can make the situation worse and even push you away from him.

So, firstly, he tries to understand exactly why you are suffering from so much anxiety when it comes to spending time with him and having more physical touch. Are you ashamed or afraid of doing PDA because of prejudiced looks since you are both men? Are you afraid that he will reject you if you show this need for time and affection? Are you publicly ashamed of others? Regardless of what's going through your head, Shanks wants to understand so he can give you truer love.

When he has a little idea or some theories, which he will achieve after observing you a lot in various situations and talking to all the other men on the ship, he will try to talk to you. Of course he will never force you into anything, he just wants to try to understand and maybe ease this weight that you are carrying alone. Even if you just want to scream or ramble without knowing exactly how to express your feelings and anxiety, he wants to be there for you, to show that he is willing to listen to you, understand you, especially validate and support you. He wants you to see that he is there for you in every situation.

Whether you decide to speak or not, the outcome changes very little. The difference being that having talked to you, Shanks will be able to understand you more easily, thus being able to make fewer mistakes in his attempts to help you and make you more comfortable with everything. If you don't decide to talk, he will be forced to make several trials and errors on how to make the environment more favorable for you to feel comfortable and overcome your anxiety, so you can give in to your desires for physical touch and spend more time with him. quietly.

Since you may have anxiety about initiating contact, Shanks will do all the hard work for you. Which, let's be honest, isn't very difficult, the redhead adores you like a loyal servant to a god, he can't keep his hands off you. It may seem funny to others to see a pirate as strong as a stray puppy following you, especially when they discover that Shanks' lover is a man, but what can he do... He is a man completely in love with you .

It's not uncommon for him to go after you, but if he notices your difficulty in initiating contact, he'll go even more after his presence. Every time he is free on the ship he will come after you, suggesting that you play a game, have a snack, talk, dance, sleep, he never runs out of ideas knowing that coming up first with a goal can make you calmer since you will just need to go with the flow and not think about everything on your own.

With physical touch, the difference is that he will pay extra attention to your comfort, it is normal that every time you are on land he is glued to your side. Holding hands or a hand around his waist practically hugging you, he just doesn't want to let go of you. In bars or any other establishment he would like to sit next to you, he would never put you on his lap, wishing that this choice came from you first. Shanks doesn't want you to feel humiliated or insulted by him wanting you on his lap, especially if you're nervous about showing affection publicly because you're both men.

But that doesn't stop him from having some physical contact, when his hand isn't occupied he'll put it on your thigh or your hand on the table, if he's drinking he'll leave his foot close to yours or even leave his foot close to yours. His leg pressed against yours. Even if it's small touches, he wants to show you that he wants to touch you just as much as you want to touch him. On the ship things are easier, he can simply hide the two of you in your shared room, thus avoiding the teasing of your crewmates and also having a little more privacy.

In the end he will just try to demonstrate that he wants your touch and attention as much as you do. He knows that actions can be stronger than words and he firmly believes that, so he will always be by your side to show you that he would never turn down spending time with you or having a make-out session. You are his boyfriend, after all! The man he loves and would do anything to see smile, he could never get tired of you.

Shanks' greatest happiness will be seeing you slowly loosen up and work on your anxiety better. When you start spending time together or touching, he will be celebrating inside. In the end, he just wants your attention and for you to show how much you love him, so he will never refuse if you want to spend time together. And even if it takes a while, even if you don't touch him for months, even if you need to talk a lot until you feel more confident, he doesn't mind at all. You are the one he loves and he would do anything for you, no effort is too much, you are worth everything he has to face and suffer, and he will accept it with a smile on his face.

If you think Shanks is easy to notice his difficulties then it only takes Mihawk an instant to notice something wrong. The difference is that the redhead will consider that some of the reasons for your anxiety could be external stimuli such as other people, reputation, shame or fear... Mihawk is a little more insecure at this point.

★彡Mihawk

His early theories for your anxiety and difficulty having quality time and physical touch with him is that the culprit is, well... Him. Are you no longer in love with him? Don't you feel comfortable? Not attracted? Is he not that interesting of a person to spend time with or is he not good at physical touch? It doesn't matter, he would initially think that it must be something he did that caused his estrangement.

He would have a few moments alone to consider everything, perhaps you no longer enjoy being in that castle without anyone's company but his. When he manages to calm his mind and open himself to any possibility, whether good or bad, he finally decides to talk to you. Luckily, Mihawk is extremely verbally expressive and is very good at communicating, so even if you were just rambling and getting lost in your own words, he will be able to understand you or even help you with how to express yourself better.

The conversation may seem a little suffocating due to Mihawk's firm gaze, but you've been his lover for long enough that he only pays attention to you like that. Furthermore, you can see a worried touch and even a loving look if you pay close attention to the way he looks at you.

Other than that, he is extremely patient with you, he will listen to you for as long as necessary and will only speak if you allow it and feel comfortable discussing it at that moment. Then he will try to analyze the entire situation to better understand your fears, insecurity, anything that is making you anxious and pushing you away from him. He will never judge any of your motives or tell you they are silly, no matter if you were just shy, if you were nervous about appearing clingy, if you were too nervous about his beauty? It doesn't make any difference why, if it bothers you in some way, then it's totally important and valid for him.

And just as he doesn't care about the reasons, he also doesn't care about the solutions to help you with your problems. He loves you with all the depth and loyalty he could have, so he is also willing to give his blood and sweat for the good of your relationship. For Mihawk it's more than fair for both lovers to make an effort, especially when one of them is in trouble, so not for a second does he think of you or this whole situation as a burden. He loves you and you love him, you are partners, you are the man he chose to spend the rest of his life with, if he doesn't make the slightest effort in trying to keep the relationship on good terms then he doesn't deserve you. That's why he will always do his best.

After that he will try to make everything easier for you, he might give you a few peaceful days without looking for contact, wanting you to breathe before facing your problems. After that he will begin his plan to slowly make you approach him again and feel comfortable coming to him whenever you want... And well, maybe he will be much happier when he can finally touch you again and spend time with you. , it may not seem like it, but Mihawk also really wants your company and the idea of being without it makes him extremely moody.

He will initially try to recapture the moments together, quality time is easier for Mihawk and he thinks that starting with that is the best way for the two of you to get closer again, after all you wouldn't be forced into any touching if you weren't already completely safe. Then he will reminisce about some of the activities you used to enjoy doing together, be it reading in each other's company during a calm evening, the sound of the fireplace and the birds outside providing a more peaceful environment for you to relax your mind and let go of the anxiety. go away. He will also invite you to garden together. If you don't like getting dirty he will just talk to you and ask for your help. That doesn't make you put your hands in the dirt. However, if you like it, he will be very happy to teach you or listen to his teachings. He will work in the garden while you talk about where you could use those vegetables. If you want, he can also help you make a flower garden or plant anything else you like.

He will also love your company in the kitchen, he may use the excuse of testing new recipes to include you more, maybe he will even try to make something that you like to eat from another island. If you cook, like it or want to learn, he doesn't mind your help either, as long as you are happy and coming out of your shell, forgetting your anxiety and allowing yourself to be comfortable and doing what you love again, he is satisfied. Also, he may start trying to initiate physical touches, if you are a swordsman he will love some sparring sessions with you, although he won't go easy on you. After all, you are a man and a worthy opponent, you can notice that his movements are much more sensual and loving, it is as if he is trying to seduce you, win you over again and using all his body language in favor of this.

If you don't fight or don't want to learn, although Mihawk would love to teach you, he can still think of other activities with physical touch. His favorite is dancing. You will find him the most patient and dedicated partner possible, if you understand dancing he will even let you guide, moving and handling his body as you wish. Furthermore, he could even go into activities outside of his standard if that could help him relax and be calmer with touch. Trying on clothes? You have Dracule's entire wardrobe at your disposal, luckily you are both men so this part is easier. Messing with hair? Of course, go ahead and touch his black hair, if you have longer hair he will enjoy learning how to style it or take care of it.

Other than that, once he notices you getting more comfortable, he'll go back to the subtle physical touches. Mihawk is not the type of lover who devours you in public, but you will always find his hand on your back, either guiding you or just making it clear that he is there. He will also offer his hand to help you get up or down from places, a hand on your shoulder or arm if you are in a situation where he wants to make it obvious that he has you and that he won't let anything bad happen.

He doesn't like more sensual touches in public, so in the privacy of four walls you will have more of that, light touches on your neck or your thigh, but they still won't be perverted touches, just a more romantic and deep touch, something he wants to keep for your eyes only.

Mihawk is a lover who is slower to deal with his anxiety, he in no way wants you to feel pressured, so he will wait with open arms when you are ready to regain intimacy. He'd also hate for you to feel like you're obligated to have this kind of intimacy with him, so he also doesn't mind if you don't like the closeness. In the end the truth is just unique, in Mihawk's eyes you are the perfect man, if you don't like so much intimacy and touching he is satisfied with that, if you like touching and want to be with him 24/7 he will too be more than satisfied. He needs you, everything you give him will be a gift. Therefore, even though he seems like a stoic and even cold man, Mihawk would never deny or be ashamed of your touch, you are the only one who can do whatever you want and he will never be bothered by it.

[canonicallyobserving911]

“I can’t imagine anything more painful than going through life alone. Except maybe one thing… going through death alone.”

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

New Buddie Multi-Chapter Fanfic - 8x6 "Confessions" through mid-season finale CODA or a "Fix it": “I can’t imagine anything more painful than going through life alone. Except maybe one thing… going through death alone.”

Chapter 6 is now available on AO3.

“I can’t imagine anything more painful than going through life alone. Except maybe one thing… going through death alone.”

Fic Summary: Eddie feels completely alone, he isolates himself and the weight of it causes him to slip into a deep depression. Once he accepts the fact that he’ll die alone, he has a decision to make regarding his life. Buck finally gets clarity about his relationship status and once he does, realization sets in and he becomes frustrated that he didn’t see it coming. Will they finally figure out they’re each other’s person before it’s too late?

Currently 6 of 10 chapters completed: 85.7K Words; Rated: Teens and Up Audiences

One chapter will be posted at a time.

___________

Here's a snippet from Chapter 6 of Buck and Eddie talking while they're sitting inside of a restaurant and their eating breakfast.

___________

Eddie uses his napkin to wipe his mouth and after he takes another sip of his coffee, he says, “Buck, I’m going to be honest with you and explain that this is not going to be easy because my mom is controlling and when she wants something, she nags and belittles people… including family members until she gets it. She tries everything to undermine the other person and the things she says will hurt. I said all of that to say… this fight to get Chris won’t be easy and if she proceeds with a custody battle it’s going to be bad.”

Buck doesn’t break eye contact with him because he’ll do whatever it takes to help Eddie get his son back. He knows Eddie’s a great dad because he’s witnessed it with his own two eyes and he knows how much Eddie loves his son.

“When I changed my will, I should have told you about it but I didn’t and there’s a reason but I’m not in a good enough headspace to get into that yet. Once this stuff with Chris is resolved and I’ve unpacked it all in therapy, we’ll discuss it but me naming you to be his legal guardian was the best decision I’ve ever made. It wasn’t fair for me not to tell you about it and for that I apologize but it’s like I said before, I know you’ll fight for him the same way I do and that’s what I want for him. This custody battle will be ruthless and we both saw what Hen and Mara went through to get their foster license back but this is different. Things are likely to get very messy really fast and I want you to know that I understand if you don’t want to go with me. So, before we leave here to go to the airport…” He trails off when Buck starts talking.

“Eddie?”

“I’m serious, Buck. I understand and I’ll pay for your airfare, so you won’t have to worry.”

How will Buck respond to Eddie's offer to pay for his airfare so he won't have to go to El Paso? 👀

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Chapter Summaries

Chapter 1 - Eddie’s avoiding conversations with everyone at the 118 to prevent having to talk about how lonely he feels. On the other hand, Buck excitedly prepares to spend a romantic weekend with his boyfriend only to learn something he should already know.

Chapter 2 - Eddie appears to be happy whenever he’s at work but the truth is he’s masking his high-functioning depression with smiles and laughter. After another call with Chris, he falls deeper into depression and for the second time since he’s been living in L.A., he considers risking it all because he has nothing to lose. Since Buck’s got clarity on his non-existent romantic relationship, his fear of being left behind resurfaces and it causes him to spiral and he thinks he’s lost everything. In his search for answers to his relationship problems, he starts asking the questions he should have asked years ago.

Chapter 3 - Both Buck and Eddie experience déjà vu numerous times over the course of three days and during those encounters, Buck’s reminded of his own definition of love while defining moments from Eddie’s past resurface and he finally forces himself to confront them.

Chapter 4 - As Eddie hits rock bottom, he has a difficult time trying to pull himself back up and Buck does what he always does, he never gives up.

Chapter 5 - Buck’s inside Eddie’s home and he’s standing right in front of him explaining he’s here to help. Eddie’s happy to see him and he’s finally ready to make several confessions about the things that have been happening and the way he’s been feeling.

Chapter 6 - As Buck and Eddie prepare to leave Los Angeles for El Paso, Eddie initiates another conversation with Buck regarding his will and before it ends, they’ll outline a parenting and legal guardianship plan that will prove they’ve been coparenting Chris for the last 7 years and the way they’ve been doing it is in Chris’ best interest.

Chapter 7 - Will be posted soon.

Chapter 8 - Will be posted soon.

Chapter 9 - Will be posted soon.

Chapter 10 - Will be posted soon.

__________

Read: chapters 1 - 6 are available on AO3.

Continue reading on AO3

[rorywritesjunk]

And I'm just the boy who's had too many chances

You and Buggy are finding out that becoming a teenager is absolutely terrible.

Rating: PG. Warning: Hurt feelings, friends being jerks, upset Reader, teenage hormones. A kiss. Buggy catches feelings. A/N: A request from @pfogjvhurnfj for a part 2 of teen Buggy. I enjoy writing him as just a teenager.

Title comes from “A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little More ‘Touch Me’” by Fall Out Boy. Part 1

You had hoped maybe Buggy would have learned his lesson when it came to poorly timed pranks on Shanks. After the misfire a few months ago that had you and Buggy spending a week on the night watch, where the first night you two accidentally had your first kiss, you thought maybe he gained a few brain cells. Didn't that happen to teens when they got older, they were supposed to get a bit smarter?

Unfortunately for Buggy, that was not the case. 

He meant the innocent prank to happen to Shanks this time, really, and maybe he shouldn't have set the telescope down unattended while he went to look for his friend, and maybe he didn't realize you were curious about what you were seeing in the water some distance away. So really, Buggy maybe wasn't completely at fault for the black circles around your eyes from it.

It wasn't so much the prank that upset you but that the boys laughed at you while Shanks said you looked like a raccoon. That had the boys laughing harder as you stomped away, purposefully shoving them aside as you went to clean your face. 

They didn’t think much of it, snickering and trying to control themselves. You’d be fine in a few hours, you normally weren’t too bothered by things like that, but at dinner, when you refused to sit with them, they figured maybe you were still mad. That was… okay, whatever, maybe you were just moody like you sometimes got. 

At bedtime, you started a few minutes before them, getting yourself ready with very little words to them. Shanks wasn’t down there yet, just Buggy, and he saw the wash cloth you had used earlier, the black ink smudged all over it. You had managed to get your eyes clean of it but the wash cloth was filthy from it.

“You… okay?” He tried asking but you looked up at him, glaring at him through the reflection of the mirror. If it was possible, your gaze would have turned Buggy to stone. “Uh, listen-”

“Shut it.” You snapped at him as you pushed away from the sink. “Don’t talk to me, Buggy.”

“What?! Why?!” He demanded, looking confused. “It’s not my fault!”

“You put ink on the eye piece, you ass!”

“That was for Shanks to get pranked, not you!” Buggy shot back as he crossed his arms, rolling his eyes. “It’s not my fault you keep involving yourself!”

“You’re such an asshole, Buggy!” You shoved past him to head to your cot. You had moved it further away from the boys, pushing it against an interior wall of the quarters. “Why won’t you accept responsibility?!”

“What responsibility? You picked it up! You got yourself pranked!” 

“Yea, but you two laughed at me!” You shot back. “And kept laughing, it wasn’t funny! It was embarrassing!”

“Why are you getting so upset over it? That’s dumb!” Buggy insisted as you crawled into your bed, trying to ignore him. “Don’t be such a baby!”

“Shut up, I’m going to bed.” You told him as you pulled your blanket over and turned your back to him. His jaw dropped. You were just going to ignore him now? No, no, he didn’t like that. You two were friends, what happened was funny! You weren’t supposed to get so upset about it. “Don’t talk to me anymore, Buggy.”

“Fine, I’ll leave you alone for the night.”

“No, I don’t want you talking to me again!” You sniffed as you pulled the blanket over yourself. “You’re such a jerk, so stop talking to me!”

Buggy stood beside your bed and stared at you. Really? You didn’t want to talk to him anymore? He scowled, though you couldn’t see it. “Fine! I won’t talk to you ever again then if that’s what you want! Whatever, you’ve become such a crybaby. You used to be fun but now you just cry all the time.”

Because you make me cry. You thought as you rubbed your eyes, sniffling still. You heard the floorboards creak under him as he remained beside your bed before he turned and stomped off. You hated feeling like this, and while Crocus and Rayleigh kind of explained what was going on as you got older, you still hated it. Why did you have to get emotional over stupid things? It wasn’t fair. The boys didn’t have to do this, if anything they became more of a pain in the ass than before. 

Why did you have to deal with this?

~

Buggy thought maybe you’d be over it the next day, but you didn’t talk to him or Shanks through breakfast, chores, lunch, any time. They tried to get you to talk, but any time they asked you a question you turned your back to them. When you didn’t sit with them at meals, their feelings were a little hurt but they didn’t say anything, and when the cook asked for help from one of the three, you jumped at the chance, wanting any task you could get away from the boys. 

Since when did you want to work in the kitchen? You hated washing dishes, but for you, that meant quiet time. The cook didn’t talk much and you weren’t up for talking, so it worked out.

You held your ground for a week until Buggy cornered you when you were by yourself in the kitchen. You tried to ignore him as he buzzed around you like a gnat and you were ready to smack him away, but you were tired. You didn’t feel up to fighting with him so you kept quiet as he buzzed around you, demanding your attention.

“You can’t still be mad!” He complained as you swept the floor of crumbs and vegetable peels. “It was a funny prank, okay, but it would have been funnier on Shanks!”

You looked at him and sighed, handing him the broom before you grabbed the dust pan to collect what you swept up. Buggy huffed in annoyance as you walked back over and knelt down in front of him, holding the dust pan firmly on the floor as he swept the pile up into it. 

“Why are you not talking to me? I want you to talk to me!” Buggy insisted, almost a whine as he gripped the broom.

You straightened up and looked at him. “I thought I was a crybaby and you were tired of me crying all the time.”

Oh, yea, he said that. He leaned on the broom and shrugged, looking down at his feet. “Well, you do cry a lot now. It’s weird.”

“And you’ve become a bigger pain in the ass.” You told him as you tossed the crud into a bin. “If you learned to apologize when you’re an asshole, I wouldn’t cry that much.”

Buggy frowned. “Why? Are you talking about when we laughed at you?”

“Obviously!” You were wondering if anyone would miss him if you threw him overboard. Was he always this clueless about how others felt? Was he just that dumb? “You both laughed at me, Buggy, it was embarrassing!”

“Yea, but Shanks called you a raccoon, not me.” Buggy reminded you. “So he should be the one to apologize.”

“He already did, Buggy, this morning after breakfast!” You exclaimed. “But you didn’t stand up for me or anything! You could have told him to stop laughing or that it was mean to say that, but you just laughed along with him!”

Buggy stared at you in confusion. First off, Shanks apologized first?! Really? And second, you… wanted him to stand up for you? You always looked out for yourself, held your own, so why did you want Buggy to stand up for you all of a sudden? It was weird. He shrugged and looked away from you, scratching his cheek as he looked a little uncomfortable. 

“Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?” He mumbled, looking over at the wall, refusing to meet your eyes. You stared at him, contemplating maybe just throwing his stupid head overboard if he was going to be this dumb. 

“Apologize, that’s all I want, dumbass!”

“Hey, don’t call me that if you want me to apologize!”

“Buggy!” You stomped your foot and clenched your fists as you glared at him. You hated how your eyes burned, that tears were welling up and starting to spill, streaming down your cheeks. He saw this and swallowed heavily, straightening up as he realized he needed to do this or else the two of you would be going in circles and never go anywhere with this.

“I’m… sorry.” He muttered, gritting his teeth. “I’m sorry, okay, sorry you were embarrassed and that Shanks and I were assholes, okay, but-”

“But what, Buggy?” 

If he said you were being too sensitive, you would definitely throw him overboard.  

“... Shanks… shouldn’t have said what he said?” Buggy suggested. Fine, it was a bit of a poor apology but it was an apology. You would take it for what it was. You sighed and nodded in acceptance to what he said.

“That will do, Buggy.” You said. “Apology accepted.”

“So you’ll start talking to me again?” Buggy asked. “Move your cot back over near ours, okay, it’s lonely without you.”

Your cheeks pinked and you shrugged. “Maybe.”

Buggy reached out and grabbed your hand suddenly. “I know Shanks apologized first, but is there something else I could do to make my apology better than his?”

Of course he needed to compete with this, but you had an idea if he really wanted to make it better. You took a step toward him and turned your head, pointing at your cheek. 

“Can I have a kiss?”

“W-What?!” Buggy turned red. Why, why would you want that? Sure, you two kissed already, accidentally having your first kiss during the night watch up in the crow’s nest together, but why would you want another one?

“I’unno, I heard someone say something about kissing and making up, so I figure that’s what this is.” You shrugged. “It’s just on the cheek, but if you don’t wanna, that’s fine.”

“... But Shanks apologized first.” Buggy mumbled, face bright red. “Fine, on the cheek, and my apology was better, okay?”

“Okay, Buggy.” 

He looked over at the door, listening for a moment to make sure no one was going to see this, before he leaned in quickly and pecked you on the cheek, nose scrunching and honking softly as it bonked your cheek. He immediately pulled back while you covered your face, letting out a quiet giggle as you blushed as much as Buggy.

“Thank you, Buggy, your apology was better than Shanks.” You assured him as he tried not to make eye contact with you. “I’ll start talking to you again.”

“Good.” He mumbled, glancing at you briefly before looking away again. “And… I am sorry you ended up crying. I uh, didn’t want that to happen so… yea.” He didn’t know what else to stay so he hurried out of the kitchen, leaving you to finish up your chores. He was glad to have this resolved but he wondered if his heart was supposed to pound in his chest after apologizing or if he was supposed to have this weird fluttery feeling in his stomach. Maybe it was just a side effect of saying he was sorry. It’d go away eventually, right?

[commander-revan]

So I finished reading through the Naruto manga for the first time last night, and I had some thoughts about how similar parts of Obito's and Touya's stories are. They have very different pasts and different reasons for becoming 'villains' in the worlds they live in, but they do have several things in common.

When they're younger they're both bright, energetic, and determined kids that both have a goal of becoming an important person in their communities (hokage/hero). While Obito didn't really have family or parental figures in his life, given that he's Uchiha there's most likely a sense of legacy he's trying to live up to similar to Touya, and they're both working towards their goals so they finally feel seen by those around them. They both feel ignored by the people they consider important (Rin and Minato/Endeavor) in favor of those who are seen as more skilled than them (Kakashi/Shoto), so they train harder and harder in an effort to finally be noticed.

Both of them 'die' tragically young at the age of thirteen, though in very different ways. Obito dies with Kakashi whom he had finally bonded with, and Rin whom he loved though he still didn't have the courage to tell her his feelings. While Touya 'dies' alone, waiting for a father who won't show up for him until he's already gone.

However, they're both saved by a major villain that was thought to be long gone They're revived and healed using rather unethical science (White Zetsu/Nomu). And they both come out of the experience with weaker power than what they once had, and scars covering a large portion of their bodies.

While Touya never buys into AFO's plans and immediately breaks out and runs home, Obito has to stay and recover. Part of him even feels indebted to Madara, even though he is a bit creeped out by him and his philosophy. Eventually, though, he gets out too with the 'help' of one of the Zetsu's. However, when they both arrive to reunite with the people they're trying to get to, they see something that sets them on their dark paths.

They come to different solutions for what they want to do (Infinite Tsukuyomi/getting revenge on his family) but they both spend time walking the world and see how more than just their personal situations are fucked up. They see how much injustice there is in their societies, and how the people up top that are supposed to protect others frequently harm and use them. (The world of Naruto is quite a bit more fucked up than MHA, but the point still stands.)

After that, they both go by an alias (Tobi and Madara/Dabi) and start setting their plans in motion, eventually teaming up with the villain who saved them. Later on, they both fight their past loved ones (Minato and Kakashi/Endeavor and Shoto) who don't realize who they're fighting initially. Though once they do finally get it, Obito and Touya point out how they should have realized it sooner.

(This is a minor one that I didn't quite know where to put, but they do both show up to the final battle with white hair and outfits.)

They both end up fighting and losing to the one that they've always envied (Kakashi/Shoto), but they get back up and do something violently self-destructive that has the power to kill a lot of people that neither has complete control over at first.

During this, and the pain they're experiencing, they both start having flashes of a life that could have been. A life that should have been so simple to have.

That's about where we leave Touya, he's down, but he hasn't been completely saved yet. Meanwhile, thanks to Kakashi and Naruto's efforts, Obito begins to realize that there is hope still in the world, and that not all of it is hell. And he ends up fighting with them to take the bigger threat to the world down. Until he eventually sacrifices himself in the end to save Kakashi (and Naruto), just like he did during his first death.

If Obito, who did way more heinous things than Touya has ever done, can be saved and redeemed in the end, then I believe Touya can too. But, unlike Obito, I think he's going to get to live afterwards.