#i really wish i could enjoy being here
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ignore 🫶
#this is just me venting about spending the weekend with my grandparents it’s seriously nothing#i really wish i could enjoy being here#but i just can’t#literally everything just makes me feel bad about the situation#i try to be nice and it just takes so much energy#and my mom was supposed to be helping and not making it worse#but the only way she can cope being around these people (my dads parents) is by drinking#which is#not great for me either#and like my grandparents haven’t even been bad this trip#but they have so many times in the past and every time i try to do a fresh start it just goes badly#so i just gave up trying#and now i feel like *i’m* the problem because they’re actually being fine#anyway i just have to make it through the weekend 👍#and then i get to go to two of my favorite places on earth and see some of my favorite people#focusing on the positive!
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got silly with this one ◡̈
#torchwood#torchwood fanart#captain jack harkness#ianto jones#gwen cooper#toshiko sato#owen harper#andy davidson#captain john hart#janto#towen#pls click and zoom in for better quality !#HELLO!! everyone who’s been leaving lovely things in the notes of my torchwood drawings I want u to know I love all of u sm!!!#really makes me smile to see people enjoying my silly drawings !!! shoutout to the person who said the way I draw Ianto is like shortbread#fellow torchwood mystery gang truthers this one’s for you#ALSO HELLO !! WELSH PEOPLE !!! ARE YOU YHERE !!! !!!! THIS ONES FOR YOU !!!#has anyone else had the specific childhood trauma of being forced into itchy ass welsh traditional dress pls say my target audience is here#this was actually a way of resolving those memories of having to wear that hat ! the boys just got to wear rugby shirts :(#DO WE THINK IANTO OR GWEN HAD TO DO URDD EISTEDDFOD !! I do !! this is my personal hc just for me bc I think it’s funny#bonus doctor who s1 for u all :D#can u guys tell I’ve just spent the past 2 months job hunting post uni from the gwen drawing :| wish I could get a job for being nosey&gay#myfawny’s tie says ‘l <3 BBQ’ btw if you couldn’t make it out >:)#pls enjoy mewing John hart 👍
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EDYN TIDESTRIDER, CHALLENGER OF THE UNDERSEA, RIVAL OF THE DEEP. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOUR BROTHER WAS CHOSEN TO BE A WEAPON OF THE GODS? HOW WILL YOU UNDO WHAT THEY HAVE DONE TO HIM?
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#edyn tidestrider#cw blood#EDYYYNNNN TTIDESTRIDERRR OHH HOW I LOVE HERRRR#THIS IS A PAGE FULLA REEAALLY OLD DOODLES AND REALLY REALLY OLD DOODELS AND NEW DOODLES. ENJOY.#ONLY CLEANED IT UP A BUNCH TTODAY AND IM ACTUALLY SO SO HAPPY W IT WEEEEE#WHAT WAS IT LIKE? DOWN IN THE UNDERSEA. TO VISIT YOUR BROTHER WHENEVER THE ADULTS WOULD LET YOU#A KID WHO DIDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS GOING ON OR WHY HER BROTHER WAS BEING TAKEN AWAY OR WHY HE KEEPS GETTING HURT#OR WHY THE ADULTS JUST KEEP LETTING IT HAPPEN. ITS FOR THE BEST? FATE OF THE WORLD AND ALL THAT? HEY WHO THE FUCK IS IN CHARGE HERE#HOW DO WE STOP IT. HOW DO I STOP IT. THERES PEOPLE OUT THERE WORKING ON SOMETHING. ARITIFICIAL LEVIATHAN YOU SAY?#WE COULD BUILD A THING TO RIVAL THE GODS. WELL. SIGN ME UP. IM GOING TO UNDO WHAT THEY DID TO YOU#WHAT A FASCINATING THING SHE ACTUALLY SAID. 'IM GOING TO UNDO WHAT THEY DID TO YOU' HELLO?? EDYN? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN#WHAT EXACTLY DID THEY DO TO HIM. OTHER THAN THE PROPHECY TRAINING. YOU CAN UNDO THAT? YOU CAN UNDO ALL THAT? HOW?? HELLO???#LIKE SURE I JUST SPOUTED MY THEORIES I THINK SHE WANTS TO KILL GOD BUT THATS JUSTA THEORY... A GA#WHAT IS EDYNS GOAL AND WHY CANT SHE TELL ANYONE OOUUUHHH EDYNNNN CMERE EDYNN CMERRE STOP WALKING AWAY CMERE. COME HERE.#fuuuuuck shes so mysteriousss what is she HIDING!!shes also so so so so angry i fucken know she is. shes so gentle and so sweet and timid#but she is ANGRY and shes SMART and clearly shes AMBITIOUS bc shes TALKING TO THE FUCKING BIG HEAD HONCHO O THE FUCKEN NNAAAVYYYYY#ALSO WHO IS NICHOLAS. IF THATS EVEN HIS REAL NAME. WHO DID YYYOU MEET EDYN. DO YOU HAVE A WISH TO BE GRANTED EDYN???#CHEWING ON THE BARS O MY CELL I NNNNEEEEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT EDYN IM SO CURIOUS IMG ONNA KILL PEOPLE#i said once in another post 'the oath an eldest sister takes on is on par w that of a paladins-#-and sometimes upheld w the very same ferocity'. I REALLY LIKED THAT LINE.#pleeese... if u can hear me.. pls join me and draw edyn w unbridled plasmatic rage abt the way her brother was treated by the Elders#also pls draw her SCARY. I NEED HER TO BE SSCARY. PLEEASEE I NEED HER TO BE JUST AS VIOLENT AS GILLION BUT INA ICE COLD WAY#JUST AS VIOLENT JUST AS STRONG JUST AS MUCH OF AN AQUATIC MONSTER. im sure u see the vision.#ok i gotta go t bed now i got work in tha morning n i should nnot be stayin up this late. if u hav thoughts abt edyn pls scream abt em#okay byyyyeee goodniiigihhttttt
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the day the earth stood still is the day i felt your presence leave it, and then every day after that.
#tw grief#sigh sigh sigh.#apologies in advance as this is not the happiest yap ! i would just like to write out some of my feelings on this day#the heaviest heart weighs under an insurmountable amount of grief — the ghost of love#days like today are a twisted reminder that has every emotion flooding through your soul#longing . guilt . anger . an indescribable melancholy that could only be consoled through the sands of time#a year ago i lost my best guy friend and it’s never really gotten easier . but ive heard it never does#all i can do is bundle up the love i have for him and search for him in the clouds that take up the sky#the circumstances around his passing will never not haunt me and rather than go into it all i’d like to say is this#if you have a loved one or a relationship or a friendship you cherish .. then never ever stop fighting for it - for them.#as time never really seems to be on our side#each day i’ll live as he intended . to greet the world with kindness and a smile and passion for positivity#in his wisest words (or rather after every phone call we’d have hehe) i’ll try my best to stay awesome & encourage you all to do so as well#if you’ve read this then i’m taking your hand and thanking you#it didn’t feel right not acknowledging him at all on this blog . he’s the one that introduced me to anime + more importantly : one piece#i wish i could talk to him about it all so he could see how far down this rabbit hole i fell just as he had done#will be spending the day enjoying his favorite episodes and being gentle with the world that surrounds us#this is not like my usual yaps & i feel vulnerable posting it but i wanted to carve out a space for him on this blog#forever missing the connie to my sasha . maybe in another universe we’ll get it right#have a wonderful sunday my sweet friendz and if you can — hug your loved ones & blow a kiss up to the sky 🤍💫#thank you for being here & helping me make this a safe place .#₊˚⊹ ᰔ xoxo aims
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idk I think you can be upset w a game not providing evil/asshole options while also realizing certain evil/asshole choices will not work with the narrative that the game is going for
#yes I wish you could be a bit more of a dick in veilguard#but I can also see how that + being an evil character doesn’t really work#I wish there was more friction between rook + the companions. and even between the companions#but like. idk being evil for the sake of it or the fun of it isn’t a fantasy I really enjoy#if there is a reason for it then sure. but making evil narratively fit into veilguard#seems like you’d have to stretch the believability of it#idk I’m not really making sense here I just woke up a bit ago#owen talks#dragon age the veilguard#not really spoilers but still tagging it for ppl
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i do understand and acknowledge that most people who pick up mdzs and get really into it walk away from the experience with wangx!an brainrot that brings them joy and suffering (affectionate) in equal measure, and--unless they're assholish at me or my pals--i wish all of those people well and hope that the veritable cornucopia of wangx!an content on this webbed site and AO3 is everything they've ever wanted out of their fandom experience. wwx is the protagonist, lwj is his court-appointed soulmate, their happily ever after is what most people pick up the books wanting to experience, and that's, you know, fine. live your bliss etc.
i just hope that one day it won't be such a hot and controversial take for fans who didn't develop wangx!an brainrot, and who found something and/or someone else more compelling and engaging about the text, to be able to say as much, and talk about it as much as we want to, without generating a bunch of passive-aggressive--or aggressive-aggressive--commentary from hardcore wangx!an stans who seem to take our disinterest in the central romance personally for whatever reason. like genuinely i would probably not dislike wangx!an as much as i have come to dislike them if i hadn't been inundated with very rude reblog commentary or anon asks early on in my fandom experience just for saying /checks my notes, "maybe jin guangyao isn't evil, actually. maybe wei wuxian did some things wrong."
dgmw, i'm glad that lots of people here are able to like jgy, for example, and still enjoy wwx and wangx!an specifically. but for those of us who don't, or who are struggling to rediscover some affection for the main pair, this attitude.... did not develop in a vacuum lol. i would just like for people to bear that in mind, i guess.
#salty peak sect 🧂#not really in response to anything in particular so much as a general ~vibe~ i've observed#i wish i could be one of those people who simply bops along and enjoys all the ships canon and otherwise#and delights in all the characters equally all the time#unfortunately...... fandom is what it is i g#edited to add that it STILL kills me how much blowback i experienced#just by telling people 'you're being rude actually. this is rude and you should stop'#like the initial rude behaviour that was a CONSTANT in the tags when i first showed up here#made it almost impossible for me to find the fun stuff i wanted to enjoy without scrolling past a bunch of hateful vitriol first#but for some reason!! which i still don't fully understand!!!#i became the asshole for calling people out over it#or--and this is even more confusing to me--just flate out saying 'that's wrong actually'#if you tag your post with a take that is objectively incorrect#and someone sees it and tells you 'that is contradicted by the text here'#the person correcting you for the thing you got wrong AND added to the general fandom tags#is not actually being an asshole#simply for saying 'this is wrong'
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for requestober ! my heart's been aching for yanderapy for a while and i would like to get something about them :3 i don't have a specific prompt . i do like to see them more on the angsty-unhealthy-relationship side lol like some of the requests you made last year . overall , just seeing anything about them would be nice . X3
Day 1 - Sodium Chloride Couple
#My art#Requestober#Yanderapy#First req of the year is my boys!! I am blessed!! 💕 Thank you for thinking of them <3#Hopefully this will sate your desires enough - it's not exactly angsty but I did try to bring in a bit of their weirdness lol#Y'know that one post that's just accidentally recreating the Homestuck shipping quadrant?#I still know very little about Homestuck but does Kismesis do anything to make the two chill out or is it just aimed at each other lol#Personally I really like the concept of a sodium chloride couple! That two people match each other's freak just right and become harmless#Because that's these two so much!! They're perfect for each other on accident (on purpose) and make each other better!#Ishida would ask too much and Mitsu would give too much if they were with different people#But their tendencies balance each other out - make them realize they're going too far because of what they see in the other#That and they genuinely like each other <3 They want to improve the other both selfishly and altruistically#Selfishly because then they get the best version of the other all to themselves hehe <3#But altruistically because they wish for each other's happiness and gain confidence in their ability to grant it#They're good for each other's self esteem! Although Ishi was already pretty self-confident before they got together haha#He feels happier and more whole with Micchan tho <3 Like he wants to - and can be! - his best self for and with him#All the mushy-gushyness on them being silly together lol - clearly it's been too long since I've doodled them I'm rambly ♪#Had a lot of fun with the hands here :) Ishi holding Mitsu's face so delicately ♫#They probably could (and probably do lol) switch who's got what and be just as happy#They just enjoy being together and making each other all head-silly haha <3 Not hard for either to achieve ♪
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Ok so today I found out Nanbaka ended some time ago so I spoiled myself and man, the ending was so rushed and angst for no reason and overall disappointing??? The author threw very important lore info and a plot twist that felt all out of the blue near the ending... I love angst but when it is well written, and this was not. Their friendship was real, even if prior to the series start wasn't I know what I read was real friendship and this ending ruins for me one of the main themes of this show.
I don't post a lot about this series because I started it before I even had Tumblr but Nanbaka was everything to me back then. Even after I was forced to move on because the english translation stopped and finding all chapters fan translated was very difficult I'd find myself thinking about these characters sometimes and I almost dare to say that it was a comfort series. Not being able to keep reading it without going through a Odyssey was already upsetting but the ending? What in the actual fuck is that. Is not even the fact it was a sad ending what bothers me the most, it's that it was sad and felt bad written or without proper building 🙁
This literally summaries my opinion regarding what happened to the main group:
Now I feel bad? Bad like when you receive bad news irl? Like I've received a punch in the stomach or a betrayal from a dear old friend
If spy x family or yuu & grim (including all of their friends in twst) separate in the end I'm losing all hope of being happy and relaxing with this trope without fearing the chance of getting backstabbed again forever
God please let them stick together or I'm going to make you the same thing you have done with me
#♡ — shut up noko#sorry I needed to vent#endings like that get my trust issues acting up /srs#how are you gonna enjoy a lighthearted family found series if you can't lower your guard bc you're afraid this will happen??#on top of that it was all the time a comedy gag slice of manga except for some action and blood here and there#and then they really decided to struck me with a bitter ending. Hurt/comfort without the comfort. all misery#and it feels so rushed and unnecessary and unnatural and too vague for an ending????#I wish I could unlearn it and keep believing they all live happily together in prison#because reality is already disappointing and mid-ish as it is. no need for more of that in fiction thanks#never thought it could happen to Nanbaka something worse than not getting a continuation of the anime#or being difficult to almost impossible to find chapters for non Japanese fans. Or being criminally underrated and forgotten for most peopl#but Murphy's law strikes again. There's always another level in the misery basement that is being fan of this series#sorry I don't handle well series I hold dearly having endings that I dislike or being cancelled#I was still recovering from Inside Job being cancelled so Netflix could give B*g f Mouth another season and now this#why God likes to ruin my day so much#nanbaka
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We ought to write more Pokemon fic some time. We want to recreate the Pokemon Manners/Human Manners cheat sheet that we made a few years ago we think that this site would like the Sliding Scale Of Politeness When Greeting A New Pokemon You've Never Met Before.
#we speak#writing#we grew up with pmd games and we feel like the way that pmd pokemon's dialogue tends to be excessively... direct?#should be a feature and not a bug when any pokemon that you meet might be totally unfamiliar with your species and biology#it's probably very polite to start up front with some basic facts about yourself so they know how to act going forward#the very upfront feel to dialogue also very much helps with keeping the dialogue feel more... pokemon#people mock the series for weird npc dialogue a lot but we think that taking these things literally makes for more fun society building#it doesn't all have to fit with socially acceptable for our world we think. polite in our world isn't even consistent by household.#sometimes a polite interaction sounds like “hello! i'm poochyena! i like to chase people and bite!”#name and immediately socially useful information. now you know about the chasing people and biting so you don't assume it's rude#of course poochyena bites and chases people. it likes to do that. you can say you don't like that and it might stop doing that to You#but it will not stop biting and chasing people because that's what it likes to do and it will probably only befriend people okay with that#it makes a very specific dialogue feel that's very fun to do. we like how the pokemon world tends to treat any sort of like#disability or “weird” things as something that you just say out the gate and everyones like “oh okay”#and then treat that as Part Of Interactions going forwards. there are a surprising amount of parts of the pokemon manga#that are dedicated to working around a character's disability after one or all of their means of dealing with it get taken out#admittedly we aren't that caught up on newer content but we find the way that it tends to be just Accepted as very refreshing#making the dialogue this direct does also tend to make it read as more “childish” in english and particular because a lot of Maturity's jus#learning how to dance around what you're saying or phrase it in different ways to get your idea across differently#whereas here everything is just as direct as possible. “i don't like charmander”. “i like roasting berries”. “i want to dig things up”.#all pokemon dialogue tends to go towards being exceedingly simple and it makes for some very distinct writing#especially when you have to tackle complex situations with characters who probably dont employ that sort of vocabulary#though we personally enjoy doing this sort of stuff your mileage may vary ofc#we are biased towards this sort of thins because we find it MUCH more fun to build up what we're talking about from blocks#than to like. try and use more indirect wording that may lose things in translation#unfortunately this is not fun in irl conversation. everyone has to be on the same page and you need to use the same playbook to communicate#we REALLY wish people said what they meant though. we're really tired of being asked shit like “is this accessible”#when what they mean is “can you climb these stairs” a question which depends on the day our energy level and how things have been going#there are a lot of things we could say that would make us feel like some sort of anti sjw type guy and a lot of em boil down to just#"for the love of god dont dance around a Sensitive Topic just get to the point and ask us about it this just makes things harder for everyo
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Another day, another suspiciously yellow and black animal showing up that i have named Bill.
This poor injured swallowtail was in the backyard, so i offered him a variety of flowers then moved him to a safe spot since i cant really do more to help him. He kept trying to climb my arms, but i politely asked him not to try to crawl on my face and i think he agreed.
When I was grabbing some flowers down the road, there was also a flock of goldfinches flitting around the thistles to add to my yellow-animals tally, but i couldn't get any good pics of them.
Between the goldfinches that have shown back up for the first time since june, this butterfly, and Bill the Caterpillar (who has since crawled off somewhere), I'm starting to debate whether spending the past 2 weeks joking about being possessed by bill cipher was a good idea.
Also i came face to face with a deer while out alone last night and i didn't like the way she took a step toward me when i held my hand out. She bowed to me so i bowed back and after about a minute of staring she decided to wander away.
#starting to fear that im living in a bill cipher themed arg#i am taking every pain to be as nice to all of these freaky animals as possible fjdklsa#just in case#id be nice to them anyway but it feels especially important now#i also usually wouldnt pick up a butterfly but his wings are already too messed up for me to really do damage : (#im learning that if you joke about gravity falls being real enough and pretend to be paranoid#then that paranoia will quickly stop being a joke fjkdlsa#the deer especially freaked me out. theyre around here all the time and are very cute#but when you lift up your flashlight to see eyes shining at you directly at human eye level its kind of Freaky#i always try to bow back to the deer. just to be nice.#was lowkey highkey convinced that she was going to try to shake my hand with her weird little hoof#also i hope bill the caterpillar is safe wherever he went#and that bill the butterfly enjoys at least one of the flowers. i wish i could do more for him but i dont have an enclosure : (#seriously though if i get possessed.... oops ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#cute animals#insects#bugs#other things#fluffle talks#not tagging this as anything but i used the show name in the tags so itll probably show up somewhere anyway fjkdsla
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Bleh
#I gotta rant n I don’t really have a place but here lol#but man is my past relationship weighing heavy on me today#(caveat of pls don’t be weird and make this his problem)#but I still just feel so lost over it#like obviously breaking up with no ill will is the ideal situation#but being forced to confront that someone you spent so much of your life growing with#can just decide they don’t like you like that anymore#like there was distance for a while before the breakup#that I don’t hold against him at all#but reflecting on the first several years of our relationship compared to the last 6months or so#feels like night and day#like you can go from someone being obsessed with you and you obsessed with them#enjoying all the parts of growing into adults together#to just feeling so unwanted bc the reality is they stopped wanting you a while ago#like going from telling friends my only holdup on polyamory was that I didn’t know if I could love another person as much as them#to having to bring to their attention that it wasn’t okay that I came to their family’s house n all he said was hi to me for the first hour#and then confronting that you didn’t do anything wrong#that shit just happens sometimes and neither of you knew how to navigate it#and fuck it makes me so scared for future relationships#because how can you not be scared when you can lose such intense love as the result of a few years passing#I almost wish it had been something I did :/#bc at least then I knew what to work on and mitigate going forward#but I can’t stop people just..#not liking me anymore
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it takes about 5 seconds of thinking about my personal life before i start to cry now i think that’s really cool and good. fun too
#said literally 3 words earlier to my mom and started to cry so i stopped immediately like i’m so tired dude.#i don’t want to think about any of it anymore. i wish i could just go on autopilot. i’m so mentally checked out#from everything and everyone. i feel like i’ve given up on almost everything i enjoy doing#i just work go home watch tv sleep and then repeat it all over and over. i can’t be still. i can’t live in the moment anymore really even#because that means i have to be present and absorb what’s actually going on around me. all the change#i feel like i’m fading into the background more and more every day#i don’t even care either it’s just kind of like …? good lol#the more i fight my grief the worse it gets#if i can outrun it until my time here is up then that’s fine. i’m sure i won’t but. lol#anyway if you read all this i’m fine i just don’t really like being alive it’s whack imo nothing brings me joy long term#it’s all fleeting. mostly i just feel blank and disconnected#and that’s it. and tired lol
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they werent lying that knuckles series barely has knuckles in it
#i pirated that shit Btw just so we're clear. also gonna talk about it a little bit in the tags#nothing too spoilery but also might not wanna read if you want to go in knowing absolutely nothing? idk#anyway he WAS a main character still he was present for a decent amount of the first couple episodes#but the amount of screentime he gets just starts dropping after that . hes barely there at all in the second half ???#and it feels like theres a lot of scenes mostly focusing on wade and his problems and not near as many for knuckles and his whole deal#overall it feels more like a wade show with knuckles in it than a knuckles show with wade in it. which sucks#and human characters having plot relevance isnt the problem here i dont mind human characters at all i think they can be really fun#its the fact that the human characters are taking over the story and spotlight when the show is called knuckles#and all the marketing makes it look like knuckles is the main focus#and i also would have preferred if they just went with a differnet character to be knuckles' human friend#because i dont particulraly care about wade. and the knuckles (and sonic and tails) i know would not be friends with cops </3#well at least the story wasnt knuckles training wade to be a better cop like a lot of people were expecting but thats like.the bare minimum#also aside from the issues relating to knuckles' screentime (or lack of screentime) i thought the ending was unsatisfying#regardless of all that though there WERE some parts i enjoyed or found kind of funny or whatever. because knuckles so cutesy as always#knuckles being a cute little guy is the most important part of the show actually#and i liked the parts with sonic tails and maddie even if they were only there for like 5 minutes#(i really wish those three had gotten more screentime. i feel like they could have easily worked in at least one more scene with them)#and its a minor thing but the opening sequence is cute. was honestly expecting just a title card or something#overall the show is just . kind of okay i guess. not the worst thing ive ever seen but still disappointing ? idk how to explain..#my expectations also werent very high in the first place#so maybe im being a bit more generous than i would have been otherwise. idk#and i definitely would not recommend this to anyone who already dislikes the sonic movies . youll probably hate this more#like people who thought the human characters got too much screentime in the second movie would lose their minds if they saw this
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2024 reads / storygraph
Shigidi and the Brass Head of Obalufon
follows an unhappy nightmare god in the Orisha spirit company - the corporate structure of gods & spirits in the modern world who deal in prayers and belief
he meets a succubus who convinces him to go freelance, and they travel the world getting their own sustenance and building a relationship
but the elder gods aren’t finished with him, and he’s tasked with stealing an artifact from the British museum, with the help of a human magician from the succubus’ past
nonlinear storytelling
#Shigidi and the Brass Head of Obalufon#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#another one I was really enjoying for most of it but by the end a few things I feel hm about#I thought the narrative style was really interesting and I REALLY enjoyed the concept of the corporate god stuff lmao#(tbqh I would have liked more focus on that. it’s mostly context/background)#the relationship between the main two….I wanted it to be like dysfunctional immortal couple kind of vibes but it kinda ended up a little to#like the MC spends a lot of the book being jealous and upset she won’t say she loves him and I’m fine with that as a character trait#if he got over himself but it’s more like She gives in at the end. eh. I feel like we didn’t truly see much depth in their relationship?#maybe wish there was more than one female character and also her being a succubus means she is kinda regularly raping people.#the examples we see are mostly shitty men and like obviously all the other gods are murdering people too but also....#That is a thing in here. It maybe could have been discussed a little more idk.#Having said that I did still enjoy a lot of aspects of it!
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#Well#Today's my birthday to my utmost dismay#I never wanted or expected to live this long‚ and I can't say I have not tried to avoid it‚#but I guess I'm not very good at dying as I am not very good at living and here I am#Anyway... I wish for nonexistence with the longing one has for a longlasting life-encompassing unrequited love#I've disliked birthdays since I was a very little kid#I think it was in my third or fourth birthday when I hid in the closet because I didn't want to blow out the candels and make it official#Not that the world or life aren't enchanting in some ways (the reflection on a wall of light falling over water)#but generally speaking they're really not my taste at all#And I wish one could opt out of it as one opts out of going to a party they really don't want to attend nor would enjoy#Without tragedies or complaints or the label of being mad or unable to make choices#I don't know...#I talk too much#I should probably delete this later
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YEAH YOU'D THINK SO HALSIN BUT APPARENTLY THERE AREN'T. there AREN'T many grateful people here who want to spend time with me. every person is just saying that but nobody actually wants to vibe. I'm just getting passed along >_>
#gale: have I ever told you about my cat... oh. you want to date? ahahah let's talk about that some other time. I'll just#wallow in the corner here... you should enjoy the party#wyll: people think I'm so scary because of my horns (I will kill them for you wyll.) ehhh it's okay go enjoy the party I'll wallow also#volo: hey boss what nickname should I give you LOL#astarion: we could fuck if you wanna eheh... if you don't wanna I could always find someone else who's not a loser#laezel: GODDDDDD I NEED TO FUCK YOU SO BAD. well anyway. enjoy your stupid party or whatever#shadowheart: doing the right thing makes me feel so crazy inside lol. wanna drink a bottle of wine?#(I would have gladly said yes platonically but I've heard that this means sex. so I don't wanna)#karlach: I LOOOOOVE BEING ALIVE I LOVE DOING GOOD YAHOOOOOO!!!!!!! I would love to have sex with someone right now.#DESPITE MY WHINGING I DID ENJOY IT. I LOVE MOMENTS LIKE THIS IN GAMES. JUST WISH POOKIE HADN'T... YEAH#AND HALSIN DOESN'T WANT TO EITHER? REALLY??? I mean I wasn't going to anyway but REALLY?
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