#disability or “weird” things as something that you just say out the gate and everyones like “oh okay”
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i still cannot comprehend how u guys will write or draw or rb something of jack where he is present as a full grown adult and then call him a precious child….
#maybe media literacy IS dead like how can u not understand that his development is not like a regular human’s????#but nah i’m the weird one for thinking he doesn’t have a toddler brain in an adult body#DO YOU HEAR YOURSELVES?!#‘well he’s new to the world. he’s just a baby’ everyone regards him as an adult who is new to the world#he literally said right out the gate he is not a baby or child. you just go the baby jack tinted glasses on and can’t separate that from#what’s in canon. ‘they call him a kid’ yeah cuz they’re in their forties and have lived a lot of lives#like kid bc he is their kid but not a kid. ‘kid’ as a term of endearment. idk if u guys have heard of the concept#when does the narrative treat him as an actual child and not just new to the world? or comparison to a child when he doesn’t have his powers#which means child as in ‘weak’ or ‘incapable’ also don’t bring up anything that disabled adults and/or especially autistic adults have/do#like velcro shoes or stimming. focus on his storylines and actual characterization please and tell me how he is a precious child#is it because he is polite? yeah well he’s also bitchy and mean and commanding. it’s almost like he’s a multifaceted character#or something. you’d think considering the writers had written children before that they would’ve chosen child-like storylines and things#for jack’s character but no this is a fantasy show. it’s not just a drama. his age is played for jokes because he *could* choose to be an#adult. because he’s a nephil. because he’s a non-human character who doesn’t abide by typical human development. his physiology is#completely different than an actual adult or child. his fingerprints are even abnormal. and y’all wanna say he is a ‘literal child’#or a ‘baby in an adult’s body’ which if that was true wouldn’t he act like a baby? and wouldn’t the writers make that clear? like where are#y’all getting this from?? i feel like i’ve missed out on a joke. like i’m standing outside the echo chamber wondering where it even#originated from#supernatural#jack kline#supernatural fandom#spn fandom#fandom critical#spn fanfic#spn fanart#spn fanworks#the infantilization of jack kline#hw.txt
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We ought to write more Pokemon fic some time. We want to recreate the Pokemon Manners/Human Manners cheat sheet that we made a few years ago we think that this site would like the Sliding Scale Of Politeness When Greeting A New Pokemon You've Never Met Before.
#we speak#writing#we grew up with pmd games and we feel like the way that pmd pokemon's dialogue tends to be excessively... direct?#should be a feature and not a bug when any pokemon that you meet might be totally unfamiliar with your species and biology#it's probably very polite to start up front with some basic facts about yourself so they know how to act going forward#the very upfront feel to dialogue also very much helps with keeping the dialogue feel more... pokemon#people mock the series for weird npc dialogue a lot but we think that taking these things literally makes for more fun society building#it doesn't all have to fit with socially acceptable for our world we think. polite in our world isn't even consistent by household.#sometimes a polite interaction sounds like “hello! i'm poochyena! i like to chase people and bite!”#name and immediately socially useful information. now you know about the chasing people and biting so you don't assume it's rude#of course poochyena bites and chases people. it likes to do that. you can say you don't like that and it might stop doing that to You#but it will not stop biting and chasing people because that's what it likes to do and it will probably only befriend people okay with that#it makes a very specific dialogue feel that's very fun to do. we like how the pokemon world tends to treat any sort of like#disability or “weird” things as something that you just say out the gate and everyones like “oh okay”#and then treat that as Part Of Interactions going forwards. there are a surprising amount of parts of the pokemon manga#that are dedicated to working around a character's disability after one or all of their means of dealing with it get taken out#admittedly we aren't that caught up on newer content but we find the way that it tends to be just Accepted as very refreshing#making the dialogue this direct does also tend to make it read as more “childish” in english and particular because a lot of Maturity's jus#learning how to dance around what you're saying or phrase it in different ways to get your idea across differently#whereas here everything is just as direct as possible. “i don't like charmander”. “i like roasting berries”. “i want to dig things up”.#all pokemon dialogue tends to go towards being exceedingly simple and it makes for some very distinct writing#especially when you have to tackle complex situations with characters who probably dont employ that sort of vocabulary#though we personally enjoy doing this sort of stuff your mileage may vary ofc#we are biased towards this sort of thins because we find it MUCH more fun to build up what we're talking about from blocks#than to like. try and use more indirect wording that may lose things in translation#unfortunately this is not fun in irl conversation. everyone has to be on the same page and you need to use the same playbook to communicate#we REALLY wish people said what they meant though. we're really tired of being asked shit like “is this accessible”#when what they mean is “can you climb these stairs” a question which depends on the day our energy level and how things have been going#there are a lot of things we could say that would make us feel like some sort of anti sjw type guy and a lot of em boil down to just#"for the love of god dont dance around a Sensitive Topic just get to the point and ask us about it this just makes things harder for everyo
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Hello! May I ask for the BG3 gang with an autistic gn Tav who is. Very Very Large but also quite young (think like... Older teen.) who just decides that Astarion/Wyll/Halsin/Gale etc is their new favourite person and WILL NOT leave them alone.
It would be very funny if they just... didn't realise Tav was actually A Kid™ and thought they were just a weirdly clingy grownup. Except Halsin. Halsin would know Immediately.
Inspired by my dumb ass being enormous and this having happened to me irl many times.
Bg3 Characters With a Young Older Looking Autistic Tav
A/n: This idea is so silly I love it. This is obviously written as platonic because reader is younger and baulder's gate characters are older and I don't write weird stuff like that lol although I'm sure that's expected. Also also i did all of them together because I do not have the energy to write sperate headcannons for each of them, dont worry they all get their moment
Gn Reader, Child/teen Reader
This was an... interesting situation
Everyone on the team assumed you were just assumed you were a bit childish for an adult
I mean could you blame them? You were massive, anyone would assume you were an adult
Except for Halsin
He could easily tell your age, but it's something he kept between the two of you, mainly for safety
Halsin takes more of a dad approach if you cling to him
He's very protective of you and teaches you new skills
He also keeps anyone else on the team from hitting on you, for obvious reasons, but wouldn't say why
He's also the most attentive when it comes to your autism, he's always keeping an eye out for you and helping when he can
It took the others longer to find, though
Wyll was the second to put two and two together
Once he realized, he grilled you about why you didn't tell anyone about it
He isn't too harsh though, and takes a more "fun uncle" role
He always makes sure to entertain you, he's the guy who's got fidgets on him just for you incase you need them
He also decides not to tell anyone for your safety after consulting with Halsin, but he does wish you said something sooner
Gale is the second to last to find out, after trying to teach you something about magic
He had questioned why you didn't know any of this, it was supposed to be common knowledge for someone your age
Or someone he thought was your age
He just stared at you blankly for a good minute after you told him how old you actually were
He's more upset at himself for not noticing to be honest
He realizes how that actually makes a lot of sense
Gale, like Halsin, also takes a more fatherly approach
he teaches you things you may have not known before, and is one of the most helpful when it comes to working through your autism
He's a knowledgeable man and can tell what you need, probably before you do
He's very protective, often insisting that you stay out of battles, but it's not like you listen to him in that department
For comedy's sake, Astarion is the last to find out, and he is pissed
He's mad that no one told him, even if it wasn't too long Gale found out and most of the party knew
He looked so dumbfounded when he found out and like Gale, was more mad that he didn't realize sooner
He's upset, but he gets over it quickly after a day or two of snarky comments and like Wyll, takes on a cool uncle postion
The whole party suddenly wants to protect you and it's suddenly become one of their top goals to return you to your parent/guardian if you have one, next to y'know, getting the worms out of your head
If you don't have somewhere to go they may or may not argue on who takes you once it's all over
Generally, you're taken good care of from then on, much better than you were before
Everyone's very attentive to you and tries to be aware of what you may need at any given point
Since they all have some type of trauma, they want to make sure the same doesn't happen to you, especially so young
Being in this situation is stressful for anyone, let alone a child, and a child with a disability
They do their best to make you happy and keep you safe
They may struggle, but they do their best, and now you have people to call family
#sharkboywrites#bg3 fic#bg3 x reader#bg3#bg3 fanfiction#platonic x reader#platonic fic#platonic fanfiction#gn reader#x gn reader#child reader#astarion x autistic reader#astarion x gn reader#astarion x reader#halsin x reader#halsin x autistic reader#halsin x gn!tav#astarion x gn!tav#gale x reader#gale dekarios x reader#gale x autistic reader#wyll x reader
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Can I have a male Baldur’s gate 3 matchup plz (ik ur bio says you haven’t gotten far in the game I’m willing to wait till you know the characters better if that helps)
Gender: cis female
Pronouns: she/her
Sexuality: heterosexual ally
Zodiac: Capricorn
Appearance: 5’2 African American hourglass body (although I’m more top heavy if you know what i mean) black curly wavy hair blackish brown eyes chubby cheeks wears glasses sometimes (im far sighted so it’s usually when driving in class or at the theater)
Mbti: infj
Enneagram: 2w1
Personality: kind smart funny motherly responsible empathetic anxious emotional moody perfectionist helpful people pleaser caring compassionate nerdy curious protective polite respectful indecisive fearful nervous introvert shy awkward clumsy low self esteem low confidence (more pertaining to my talents or personality then my looks) sassy sarcastic (I’m mainly these things with people i feel comfortable with like friends or family) soft spoken cute (my friends think im cute because i can be pretty innocent plus I’m small physically)
Likes: animals books reading writing fantasy magic sci fi anime music video games friends alone time learning personality quizzes sweets and bread helping being a part of something bigger than myself
Dislikes: spiders loud sounds people who harm others people who don’t take others into consideration (like make insensitive jokes or don’t consider the comfort of others or are mean just cause they can) people i care about not caring for themselves (im a hypocrite on this i take care of everyone else but not me) not being listened to weird holes and patterns math and tests (I’m being tested for a math disability and i have test anxiety)
Love language:
Giving: acts of service gift giving and physical affection (if they’re ok with it)
Receiving: words of affirmation and physical affection (although i can be shy about it)
Extra: i pace a lot i sing when im alone i talk to myself im a picky eater (mainly with textures) i have a cat i have minor ehlers danalos (a hyper mobility disorder) but it doesn’t hurt me like it does my sisters i get abdominal migraines which is basically like a migraine but instead of headaches it’s nausea
Thank you
I match you with…
Master Halsin 🐻
Like you, he is very against the idea or prospect harming of others in any way. Physical, mental, or even ignoring someone.
That goes for animals as well!
Anyone who respects nature or animals is a friend in his book.
Oh and he won’t force you to ‘face your fear’ of spiders. They’re not for everyone and he knows that. (Me too, I got ops with them things)
He’ll gently guide them out your way though if any pass by.
Especially those who take time out of their day to be nice to others, regardless of what they look like.
Albeit, even if he is the First Druid, he can always understand shyness. You’re not the first person he’s met to be introverted or shy- so he knows how to approach you.
Also as a healer, he can probably assist you with the nausea in some regards.
Via healing spells mostly, and if that doesn’t work there can be more realistic ways to help.
He’d also appreciate having someone who can take care of others while he’s away, someone to hold down the fort.
Granted, he doesn’t expect you to one up people like Kagha. No- he means just to assist those in need.
He’s more than willing to help you out in any way possible.
He’d also be reminding you to take care of yourself, in and out of battle.
You’d be apart of his nature, he’d make sure you’re growing instead of wilting.
(A/N) might be OOC, I’ve only ever had villainous runs. Blame Astarion, Lae’zel and my Durge😭 hope you like it tho!
#master halsin#halsin#halsin bg3#halsin baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate#baldurs gate fanfic#baldurs gate iii#bg3#bg3 x reader#bg3 x you#bg3 x tav#halsin x tav#halsin x reader#master halsin x reader#fanfic#fanfic blog#druid halsin
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1,2, 9, 31, & 35 for ophielora plsss
BG3 Act 1 Asks
HEHE THANK YOUUU ilysm
(1) Tell us about your Tav! Name, class and subclass, race, pronouns. Do you have a headcanon for where they're from? Their family? Are they a Dark Urge? Or did you choose an Origin Character? Was it an easy decision?
okay if im being honest i am a BIT SCARED of the dark urge so i haven't made one yet. i went straight for an original tav for my first playthrough her name is ophielora. she is a circle of the land druid, though i do think if we expand out to like. "official dnd" classes, she might be circle of stars instead she is not from baldur's gate, my headcanon is that she was just in the city for a few days trying to "find herself" and "learn things" when she gets picked up by the mindflayer ship (just her luck). she is actually from from a large stretch of woods nearby-- the wood of sharp teeth. while she is definitely not a werewolf, her circle's perferred forms are unusually wolves and other carnivores. she also refers to her family as her "pack."
she has two "happy" parents-- one of them being a human archdruid and her mother being a creature called a hamadryad who is. . . an interesting character. her father is your classic druid elder, who, after being blessed with a child from the great oak they worship, was kind of put entirely in charge of raising her. she has a lot of her dad's mannerisms, but a bit of weirdness of being from a non-human bloodline. her family also has some type of connection to mielikki, daughter of sylvanus and goddess of the hunt. she is a life cleric for the build in game but i dont think she's actually that religious.
she sometimes says or does weird things that a "civilized" person would not. nakedness doesn't bother her, neither does being in animal form for long periods of time. she also is. . . incredibly unlucky and awkward. she often says the wrong thing at the wrong time. but! she is VERY friendly. she is the type of person that can & will talk to anyone and everyone. she is kind, to an aggressive degree. it's a bit of naivity, which she grows out of, and a bit of "i want to be good. i want to be so good it hurts"
she looks like this!!!
(2) Was there something about the character creator that just couldn't capture your Character? Please tell us about their hair, facial hair, tattoos, piercings, disabilities, their trans or intersex body, or anything else you're comfortable sharing
HEHE.... HRMMM okay i think it captures her Pretty well? i do think she should have little pointy teefs. i think also she has a few more piercings than just her nosering, all of them main from animal bones. her hair is a strange mix of red and blonde, likely due to her dryad blood, but she likes it! she wears it in a high ponytail braid combo. i imagine she spends a lot of time braiding/weaving flowers and branches in her hair. for a while i had her wearing a little circlet which i think is cute <3
she is a bisexual cis female! i don't think she's particularly curvy or anything, probably more on the skinny/flat-chested side of things. she is very short hehe. probably around 5'2", which makes for a lot of dropped jaws when her dire wolf form is like twice to size of her human form.
(9) Do you have a favorite member of the Tiefling Refugees? Is it the same as your Character's?
i loooove rolan i spin him around in my head. i think ophie and alfira get along very well! ophie lovessss to dance <3
(31) Does your Character have new or old phobias or superstitions that affect their story?
okay i LOVE this question even though i don't know the answer. i think she is VERY careful to speak to every animal she sees. she also believes that like. undead things are very necessary for the circle of life? i think its part of why she's so fine with astarion being a vampire.
i think she has a bit of a guilt complex like... she has such terrible luck she gets trapped a lot in these like. . . depressive episodes? she (and her mother) call them her "winters". she feels like she must being doing SOMETHING wrong to feel like this, and so she tries to counteract that with being Forcibly Good at every opportunity she can.
(35) Has your Character done anything that they regret in Act 1?
I MAY HAVE PRESSED THE WRONG BUTTON AND LAUNCHED THE GNOME THAT WAS STUCK TO THE WINDMILL HALFWAY TO BALDURS GATE AND IT IS TOTALLY CANON TO OPHIE'S STORY. SHE THINKS ABOUT IT ONCE A DAY :(
she also feels a Bit Bad about killing all the goblins in the camp
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stargate episodes that should have been, part 20: an alternate reality episode where cam went to atlantis and sheppard joined sg-1. in this universe cam wasn’t injured in antarctica and i think that he is the kind of guy who would go to another galaxy for fun and also because he has to do the Best thing he can possibly do and that’s going to another galaxy. sheppard for whatever reason didn’t sit in the chair but did still fly jack down to antarctica so when they’re looking for sg-1’s fourth jack is like “well there’s this guy i met who kinda reminds me of me except he likes antarctica for some reason” so he becomes sg-1’s fourth under sam’s command. i think at first that would cause issues because of his problems with following orders + sam is new to her command and feeling somewhat insecure about it BUT these issues aren’t with sheppard disobeying sam’s orders they’re just sam worrying that he will. because sheppard only disobeys orders that he sees as bad and from what i remember of s4 + his personality in general he really respects sam. anyways this is actually a 3-parter because you have the sg-1 episode where our sg-1 meets the other sg-1, the atlantis episode where our atlantis people meet the other atlantis people, and then the crossover where they all meet one another because you can’t have the sheppards and the cams not meet themselves. i have no idea where in the timeline it is beyond “not season 4” because there are inconsistencies, but whatever. it’s also very long so i am using paragraph breaks for once!! also i will be putting a 1 after the duplicates from the show universe and a 2 after the duplicates from the au for clarity. (everyone without a number is the only one of themselves present and is from the au). also i definitely got carried away and this is too much plot and not enough character interaction even though i originally thought this one up for the character interactions, oops.
EPISODE 1: SG-1. somehow, our sg-1(1) is pulled through to this other reality. something to do with ba’al messing with some ancient tech in the other reality. the sg-1(2) of that reality, led by sam2 and featuring a major sheppard2, has snuck onto the ha’tak ba’al is using as his base of operations. they run into our sg-1(1) and there’s some spider-man pointing meme and then sam1 and sam2 start discussing how this could have happened while the valas compliment each other’s hair and cam1 and sheppard2 go “wait but you’re supposed to be in atlantis” “no, YOU’RE supposed to be in atlantis.” eventually we find out that ba’al is using ancient tech to develop a hyperdrive capable of traveling between galaxies, which the goa’uld don’t have. his test destination is the pegasus galaxy because he figures that if it works for one jump but then fails, then he can just turn up at atlantis and ask the tau’ri for help again after threatening them lightly to save face. obviously the humans don’t want ba’al going to pegasus, because we like our villains to stay confined to just one galaxy, and also if his hyperdrive works then he could destroy atlantis or ally himself with the wraith or be defeated by the wraith and have his ship captured and now the wraith have an intergalactic hyperdrive or—well, there’s lots of ways it could go wrong, and sg-1(1) gets the point that they need to help sg-1(2) stop ba’al. they spend much of the episode tracking ba’al and sneaking around the ship, until they finally corner ba’al in the engine room and teal’c2 shoots him. unfortunately, they enter hyperspace almost immediately after this, and are captured by… another ba’al. END.
EPISODE 2: ATLANTIS. somehow, our atlantis team1 is pulled through to this other reality. something to do with mckay2 and zelenka messing with some ancient tech in the other reality. our atlantis team1 is quickly locked in interrogation rooms because who are they and why is major sheppard with them instead of colonel mitchell? this tips off mckay1 to the fact that they’re now in an alternate reality. fortunately mckay2 and zelenka have already reached this conclusion and they’re let out of the interrogation rooms just in time for news to reach atlantis that a ha’tak has arrived in pegasus. (and also before ronon1 and ronon2 start fighting instead of just glaring menacingly at one another, because who thought it was a good idea to have ronon2 interrogate ronon1. he didn’t even ask any questions.) alternate weir decides to send the atlantis team2 in to investigate but mckay2 is like “i’ll need someone to help me with the goa’uld tech, we’ll take zelenka” but zelenka is immediately like “no?? there’s another you here. take him. i don’t like leaving the city” so it’s decided that both mckays will go, and you can’t send mckay1 without the rest of his team so EVERYONE is going. they take two jumpers because mitchell2 and sheppard1 both want to fly the jumper. when they arrive through the space gate that the ha’tak is near, they see a badly damaged wraith hive with no life signs. the ha’tak has also taken some damage, but much less, and they’re able to fly through a hole in the hull to board. they detect minimal life signs: two on the bridge, eleven in the cells, and a few others scattered around that must be ba’al’s jaffa. the group decides to split up; they toss a coin and mitchell’s team2 goes to the bridge while sheppard’s team1 goes to the cells. when sheppard’s team1 arrives at the cells, they find them unguarded but locked. mckay1 cracks the lock and we see the cell doors slide open. cut to the bridge. when mitchell’s team2 arrives, they see one of the dots on the life signs detector begin to fade. mckay2 gets the door open just in time to see ba’al collapse to the floor, having been fed on by a wraith. END.
EPISODE 3: CROSSOVER. what the hell, ba’al is in a wraith now. (i’ve always wondered about what would happen if the goa’uld met the wraith; would they fight and if so who would win? or would a goa’uld take a wraith as a host? is that even possible? i say yes because it’s Fun.) the symbiote entered the wraith and then promptly fed on his former host because he was hungry. this is obviously Terrible News because the wraith are bad enough but tbh they’re not very smart. ba’al is. mitchell’s atlantis team2 all point their weapons at him and radio sheppard’s atlantis team1 to let them know there’s now a goa’uld with a wraith host. sheppard1 responds and says “ok, we’ll we’ve got two sg-1s here. and also todd” to which mitchell2 replies “who the hell is todd?” (“pale skin, long hair, likes to suck your soul out with his hand but makes it weird by returning your soul ten minutes later?” “oh you mean casper.” “what the hell kind of a name is casper?” “what the hell kind of a name is todd?!”) we find out that “casper”, who is of course alternate todd but was named casper by mitchell2, was on the hive ba’al disabled. he and one other wraith were taken aboard the ha’tak, and he was put in the cell for later in case the first implantation of a wraith didn’t work. he’s willing to help everyone defeat wraith ba’al, because goa’ulds taking wraith as hosts is bad for the wraith too. so they do some stuff, and with much difficulty, kill wraith ba’al. it’s harder than killing a normal wraith because he has the goa’uld regenerative ability, and also he keeps feeding on his jaffa to recover after being shot. eventually they manage to trick him into a set of rings and space him. then they have to decide what to do with the ha’tak. casper wants it for himself because of the intergalactic hyperdrive and turns on them. they manage to activate the self destruct and flee back to the jumpers. they believe that casper is destroyed in the self destruct, but he survives somehow. the rest of the episode is the sams, mckays, and zelenka trying to figure out how to send sg-1(1) and the atlantis team1 home. we also get a few character moments between everyone and their counterparts: cam2 and both sheppards discuss puddlejumpers while cam1 is sad because he doesn’t have the gene and never received gene therapy so he can’t fly a puddlejumper. they break into medical to convince beckett to give cam1 the gene therapy; they’re pretty sure it’ll work on him since it worked on cam2. it does, and the cams and the sheppards immediately have a race to the mainland and back. (the sheppards win, but it’s close, and the cams try to blame it on the fact that cam1 has never flown a jumper before while everyone else has.) the daniels go to the library together and share their knowledge about the ancients and the ori; mostly they know the same stuff but they do both learn a few new things. the ronons fight one another. it’s a draw. the teylas and the teal’cs watch the ronons fight, and then meditate. the valas flit between each of the groups and compare their versions of everyone. vala1 ends up in weir’s office and bugs her with a bunch of questions until weir actually puts down her work and just Hangs Out. vala2 ends up with the cams and the sheppards because she’s absolutely best buds with sheppard2 and desperately wants to meet sheppard1. anyways after everyone hangs out for awhile they go home and it’s a very :) ending, which is what they need after All That.
i like this character swap idea a lot because after watching the pegasus project i was kinda chomping at the bit for more character interaction between sheppard and the rest of sg-1. particularly vala. more after the cut cause i wanna yell about all the other stuff i love about this!!
i also like the idea of sheppard not being in the team leader position. it makes me wonder what him following orders offworld, particularly sam’s, would look like. i don’t remember him and sam butting heads over command decisions in quite the same way him and elizabeth did at the start (sheppard wanting to go go go, make slapdash decisions, usually in an effort to help people, altho sometimes misguided, particularly in hot zone, vs elizabeth who was often looking towards a less militaristic approach, i.e not trading explosives to the genii, not torturing a POW etc. and who took her time making decisions). but then again, both sam and john are military. so, it’d be interesting to see how sam manages him along with the rest of the team. also, since hes not in a leadership position (no ones counting on him to keep the team together), would he be even more gungho about the self-sacrifice play? or just the same as ever? anyway, enough about john (once i start, i can’t stop, it seems), let’s get into the episodes!!
Episode 1:
“if it works for one jump but then fails, then he can just turn up at atlantis and ask the tau’ri for help again after threatening them lightly to save face.” LMAO truly ba’al’s modus operandi.
and the wraith potentially stealing hyperdrive technology is DEFINITELY something sg teams of all universes and galaxies should team up to put a stop to. a whole new galaxy to feed on?? not to mention earth??? NOT GREAT. the situation definitely calls for earth’s mightiest heroes squared.
also i appreciate a good sneak on an alien ship. especially times 2. and who would partner with who?? so many fun character combos!
Episode 2:
LMFAO OKAY. ronon vs ronon is such a ronon thing that i laughed out loud. both of them would definitely wanna know which one was tougher. also. also. i would love for zelenka and mckay1 to have a science twin moment and mckay2 to get all proprietary and be like “get ur own!”
i can’t imagine rodney would get along all that well with himself so its a good thing the rest of the teams will be there to run interference. and be separated on the ride there bahaha. cam and sheppard would totally fight over who gets to fly the cool spaceship (the teylas look at each other with raised eyebrows of sympathy and respect. both teams require them to pull on their reserves of infinite patience).
OOOO and ending on a CLIFFHANGER and INTRIGUE, QUICKLY, to the next episode!
Episode 3:
u kno, i was thinking earlier, after reading the first episode, what would an interaction between goa’uld and wraith look like? my immediate thought was, they are either gonna join forces to crush the stupid humans or fight because the goa’uld kinda need those humans for indentured servitude and, u kno, living. or, u kno, they would fight just because their ginormous egos clashed. but NEVER did the thought occur to me that a goa’uld might take a wraith as its host for its superior genetic makeup over humans (super strength, jedi mind tricks, telepathy etc.) and this is why ur brain is amazing. and a smart, conniving creature in control of a wraith body…spells trouble. and i didn’t even consider the double healing factor which would make any wraith on par with an uber wraith (that i dont remember ever seeing after the defiant one lol).
also cam naming his todd casper means everything to me. his ability to drop movie/pop culture references no one gets/appreciates is extremely endearing.
another amazing thing about this; sam actually gets to science with mckay and zelenka FOR ONCE. i’m really sad we were deprived this in season 4, like i get sam was the leader of the expedition in that season, and it wasn’t her job to be doing science/where is the time, but u can’t take the science out of the girl, no sir. i just wanted the beautiful mind children to be techno babbling it up, all with a begrudging respect for one another, as everyone stares in awe and confusion.
and cam gets to fly cool spaceships!!!! for leisure! with no one threatening his life! he did not get to do enough flying imo. and the teyla’s definitely deserve meditation time after dealing with double of their rambunctious team. and YES elizabeth deserves to have fUN. vala is the best person to help her with that. and vala and sheppard!!!! being buds!!! ALL I HAVE EVERY WANTED FROM STARGATE! what a fantastic ending to a wonderful series of episodes.
#dunno why i want them to hang out so badly?#maybe its because we never really saw it on the show?#because i think they would really hit it off?#or maybe its all of auburn’s fic imprinting on my brain in the most wonderful way (she always wrote their interactions so lovely).#anyway what an awesome series of episodes!!#this is everything i love about science fiction#it has no limitations#except the ones in our own imagination#the alternate universes#character interactions#use of aliens#absolutely inspired#thanks so much for this one#sg1#sga#asks
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can we do it? - billy/four - chapter 7
sorry for the long delay of chapter 7,, i think this may end at 8 or 9 but i’ll try to get to 10
school is really getting hard at the moment and it’s only the end of the second week so i really hope you guys bear with me on everything and i still have another ben request to write so i’m sorry to whoever sent that i am working on it
i also would like it if you guys maybe send in some feedback on the stuff i write because i am doing this for free and i know that sounds rude but i am taking time out of my day and night for you guys to read everything
summary: one team, seven people, two lovers, things, are about to get crazy and zero and four don’t know if they can manage do it
masterlist
# of words: 2,708
warnings: angst, drama,
taglist
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After what happened with the mission to get Murat, everyone revealing their names after Billy almost died and Blaine saving him to Billy and Y/N getting lectured by One, everything was still going according to the revised plan. They needed to go to a few more locations before the final stage of the mission. When boarding the plane, they decided to actually sit next to each other rather than be sitting opposite from each other. Everyone knew that they loved each other and wished that nothing would happen to them seeing that they are the youngest in the group. They already lost one member and they didn’t need to lose another. That night when Billy and y/n were talking it felt like they were finally able to get everything that they wanted to say since they first met off their chests and they finally did.
Billy and y/n were quietly talking before Blaine announced that they were going to take off which caused her to grab his hand and squeeze it. She didn’t have problems with flying, she just didn’t like turbulence and this time she didn’t have to pretend to be okay and feel like her brain was about to explode. He noticed this and began to run his thumb over her hand reassuring her that it was alright and should pass over soon before giving a kiss on her head.
“It should pass over soon. Don’t worry.” he whispered in her ear
“So what was it like? I mean sneaking around and doing everything. Has it been like that since the beginning and you just said that you’ve been together since Vegas or?” Javier asked them curiously
“Well i’ve pretty much liked her since One recruited me, she was like behind him watching everything go down”
“When you came to the grounds you looked like you were about to shit yourself.” Camille mentioned as everyone started to giggle as Billy’s face turned red
“I mean he technically did almost kill me while she stood there doing nothing” he tried to argue as y/n gave a kiss on his cheek
“I’m sorry for not doing anything.” she told him while giving him a sincere look
“It’s okay, i forgive you. Besides, if we’re being honest, I only stayed because of you.” he confessed
The rest of the plane ride wasn’t too long seeing it was only going to be about 10 hours. They all caught up on some sleep but Billy couldn’t sleep at all and Y/N noticed it because he kept moving around and shifting in his seat. She began to become concerned for him thinking that it must’ve been that bad for him not to be able to sleep on a plane for a few hours. As he continued, she began to draw on his hands to make him relax--she soon felt him tense down and take even breaths rather than fast paced ones. Everyone looked at them and saw how perfect they were for each and how they kept each other grounded. It went on like that until they heard Blaine start talking again
“Hey, ghosts. This is Seven, AKA Blaine. We’re below radar, we’re entering Turgistan airspace. That gives us about four days until Day of the Dead.”
As they stepped off the plane, they got ready to go undercover to gather at least a few more pieces of data before the next few days happened. Y/N took a look around and didn’t realize as to how beautiful everything looked and didn’t understand why a place like that had to have it run by someone so awful.
They all split up into three teams. Two and Three; Zero, Four, and Five; Seven and One. all in different spaces and Murat with One and Seven in the backseat of one of the cars they stole, complaining.
“How’s it going on your guys’ end?” Y/N asked they sneaked into the facility up in the Turgistan mountains
“Our new number Zero, apparently, is doing great and his brother is going to cut off his head.” One told them sarcastically
“Bomb’s are set” Camille said quietly looking around to see if anyone saw them set it up while praying
“I wonder how many people you have to kill just to get a statue of yourself.” Javier asked looking at the statue at Rovach
“Okay, we’re at the TV relay.” Billy told them then getting the bolt cutters out
“Hey, you okay? You don’t always have to pretend you’re okay all the time.” Y/N asked whispering the last part to him as he just ignored her as he just cut the chain holding the fences together
“He’s in” Amelia said
Y/N felt like everything she and Billy had talked about and being open with each other over the past couple days had just been thrown out the window and as if they didn’t tell each other they would always be honest with how they felt and to never ignore them. As they entered Amelia and Y/N had gone through another side while Billy had climbed up the satellites to place the inverters.
“Hey, what’s wrong with you two? You seemed fine on the plane and now he’s not talking to you unless it’s for this.” Amelia had asked concerned
“I’m not sure. Something’s wrong but i know if i ask him he’s going to snap. Even after we talked about how we should always be open with how we’re feeling.” Y/N told her as she got out her laptop and set everything up for the two of them.
If Amelia was being honest herself, she was worried for the both of them, but also was because she had also liked billy. She knew it was wrong because Y/N and Billy had been together for a bit now but still she couldn’t help but feel something for him. The night before when they had gone to their separate rooms, she had wanted to talk to them. When they started talking, she started to move closer and closer to the point where their lips almost touched. Of course, they didn’t want to tell Y/N because he didn’t want to cause a rift in the team especially after that they proved to One that they were able to date while being in the team and truly care about each other. Y/N feels as if it’s something going on between them because of how they were both acting but all she could do was brush off the feeling and continued on with the mission. All they had to do was disable the security at Rovach’s palace so they were able to get on to his yacht.
1 day till Day of the Dead
One and Y/N had figured out a way to do that by having an unannounced visit to his state run power generator One and Blaine were going to be the ones who were going to go undercover to try and get inside to overrun it while Y/N stayed behind with Amelia to help them.
“All right, guy. You’re clear to the gate.” she told them
“Are you sure this is going to work?” Amelia asked
“Well, you never underestimate the power of a very nice suit. It always works. Seven, remember they don’t like Americans” One told them
“Okay everything’s looking good. They’re in” Y/N mentioned looking at the monitors
There was a moment of silence as they went in and Y/N thought it would be a good time to ask Amelia what was going on between the three of them as they had a bit of time in between.
“Hey, do you know what’s wrong with Billy? He’s been acting weird since the plane ride yesterday and he won’t talk to me when I ask him about it. He always just brushes me off.” she asked with her voice somewhat shaky. Amelia didn’t know how to answer her and wanted to tell the truth but she didn’t and made something up
“Maybe he’s still shocked over what happened with the water? I mean i’m not a psychiatric doctor but I do know that kind of stuff can last for a long time” she told her as her leg started to shake
“Maybe, i mean we told each other we would always be honest and I don’t want to get hurt again and I want to trust him that he can take care of himself.” Y/N told her looking back on the monitor
“He’ll come around, don’t worry about it too much.” Amelia smiled at her as she was going to talk back before they heard One start to talk in a fake accent
“Manchester.” he said in the worst Scottish accent they have all heard before
“Manchester and Farquarson. We’ve got a website, look it up. Inspection is our business. That’s the slogan.” He finished
“And your name again?” the front desk guy asked
“My name is Mr. Worthington, -and this is my associate, Mr. Ferijips--” One said
“Ferjelpo” Blaine interrupted in another one of the worst fake accents the two women have heard before as they put their heads in their heads
“Surjepo-- and he’s from--” “Turgistan.”
“Do you want soup?”
“Got any booze in there?” One asked
“I’m going to need booze just to forget this happened.” Y/N mumbled as Amelia agreed having to hear the two men
“Compliment his wife. There’s a picture” she quickly retracted back\
“Is that your wife over there?” One asked
“It’s my daughter.” the secretary said angrily slamming the thermos on the desk
“Oh shit.”
“uh…”
“It’s hard living out here isn’t it? I mean, i have a family trying their best all over the world and they just can’t seem to listen when i tell them. Did she come out full grown? Faked me out there with the gray hair and the wrinkles- and the orthopedic shoes and-- ” One asked
“One what the fuck are you saying don’t say that shit” Y/N told him
“What do you want?” he asked
“An unannounced stress test would be one. Plants three through seven, they passed. And I have no doubt that you will, too. All right. The only failure was plant two. You know that was very-”
“Plant two failed?”
“--minor. Yes, so, you know Mr. Noor? We’re trying to keep his name out of it.”
“Noor is a fool”
Y/N couldn’t help but let her mind wander over to Amelia and the way she was acting, especially after she had asked her about what was going on with billy. Did she know something? Was she the cause of it? It wasn’t because of what happened in Hong Kong because she would know and has known him for a while now to understand the way he comes off. He pretends everything is fine, but really it’s not. She knew everything that has happened to him, all his arrests, knew everything he ever stole, how he was living, his girlfriends, the fact that only five people went to his funeral and three had left before it even finished, you name it. She quietly send him a separate message on the phones that they all use to keep in contact with asking if they could talk later when they were done
“Hey, can we talk later?”
“Yeah, sure what about?”
“I’ll tell you later. I love you.” she said hoping it’ll get something out of him--but it didn’t. She didn’t get a reaction from him at all and just left her on read. She knew she shouldn’t be upset over something like this but she couldn’t help but take it to heart. The last time she was in this situation she got her heart broken and didn’t leave her house for over her month--the only difference was this time she didn’t have any friends or family that she could turn to that she could trust without them saying “i told you so.”. All she had to do was suck it up and take it like an adult for this time and not act like a teenager. She was pulled out of her thoughts when Amelia started to shake her shoulder to ask for help with One and Blaine after they had managed to mess up the mission and did not know what to talk about.
“Hey, they need us, like right now.” she said as she rummaged through some documents they had with them to not leave a digital trail
“Noor’s dead. Say he’s dead” she told one
“No, he’s dead. He died” One said as Y/N saw that it was the wrong guy amelia mentioned
“One, no. That's the wrong guy. He’s alive. Fuck. You have to recover somehow. Do what you’re good at and bullshit something.” she said panicking
“Yeah. he was found with a belt...tied around his neck in an unfortunate masturbating accident. Ferocious masturbating accident. It was very sad.” he said
“One, shut the fuck up.” Amelia yelled into the mic
“What?” “Come on. We’ve all choked ourselves having a little choke, haven’t we?” One finished
“Oh my god. Now I’m really going to need booze to forget this all happened.” Y/N groaned
Somehow it worked and One and Blaine managed to get through security and inside. They were led inside to a satellite room where all the power was being transmitted so they could make sure everything was fine.
“This is our finest room. It transmits all state-run television and power to the palace.”
“It’s very efficient”
“Maybe Mr. Grace can mention it to Mr. Bashir.”
“I doubt it.”
“We got it Zero.” Blaine whispered
The two men continued to bullshit their way out of the situation as the women behind watched them. Javier was waiting for them onsite to pick them back to where they were staying. When they arrived she found Billy sitting on the steps outside of the small house. He didn’t notice her at first and continued to pick at his fingers. He soon stopped when he saw someone standing right in front of him and saw her clutching her bag. He nodded and got up and followed her to somewhere where they could talk in private.
“I really hate to do this, but what is going on?” she asked him
“What do you mean? Nothings wrong.” he told her furrowing his eyebrows
“You know what i mean.” she sighed before continuing
“I know you haven’t been honest with me lately. I don’t know if it’s from Hong Kong or something else, but just please tell me if you don’t love me anymore.” she told her tears already creeping up in her eyes
“Nothing’s going on. I promise you. Yeah, it’s from Hong Kong. I do love you. I really do.”
“Billy please.”
“Nothing is going on. God, you’re so fucking clingy. Maybe it’s a good thing i’m keeping something from you.” he yelled at her
Y/N couldn’t say anything but just stand there shocked. Did she do something wrong? She knew that she may have overstepped but she just wanted to make sure that everything was alright with him. It was just something she had to do; make sure people were okay and that they were taken care of before herself.
“God, you know maybe i should’ve just let Amelia kiss me. I shouldn’t have stepped away. At least she doesn’t ask me how i’m doing every two seconds.” he finished running his hand through his hand
“You know, this was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have gone out that night and I should've just let you. One was right. I was going to regret this.” Y/N told him, tears leaving her eyes as she felt her chest tighten more, turning back to go to the house.
Everyone overheard them fighting and looked over to Amelia where she felt easily as guilty for what just happened. When she got to the house, she couldn’t even look them in the eyes and just went to her room. Billy couldn’t help but yell at the sky and kick the dirt below him as tears streamed down his face.
#ben hardy#ben hardy imagine#ben hardy x reader#ben hardy x female reader#ben x reader#ben hardy x y/n#ben hardy x you#ben jones#ben jones x reader#ben hardy fanfic#ben hardy fanfiction#ben hardy fic#ben hardy angst#ben hardy smut#ben hardy fluff#ben hardy drabble#ben hardy blurb#billy!ben x reader#four!ben x reader#four x reader#four!6underground#6 underground#warren worthington iii#warren worthington imagine#warren worthington x reader#roger taylor imagine#roger taylor x reader#roger taylor#bohemian rhapsody#borhap
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Damienette arranged marriage: part 24
Credits: Miraculous Ladybug team for the elements I take from MLB show. DC for their characters, @ozmav for the AU, @maribat-archive for giving me access to so many different stories to have take inspirations from, @thyladyanput for idea for Chat Damian and me for the plot.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8
Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 part 14 part 15
part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21
Part 22
Part 23
Damienette arranged marriage: part 24
NEXT
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“Papa will help us on this one. And maybe we should call the cavalry from Gotham?”
“Relax Angel. We have two to one number advantage. We can deal with them.” Damian reassured her.
‘Fine. We two weeks until we leave. It is decided then. In one week, we storm the Agreste Manor.”
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The week passed by faster than anyone wanted. Marinette especially felt like it was all in such rush. It was overwhelming. After over two years of fighting hawkmoth they were finally about to put an end to his reign. That is if Tim’s assumptions were correct. It was still just a theory. Really solid one, but theory nonetheless. They did know Adrien was Chat Noir. This was without doubt. Nobody else could be him if what Tim gathered was correct. It’s amazing what you can figure in two months with good logic skills and enough hacking skill to have White House Coffee machine prepare a frappuccino with your face on it for a week. ‘Batboys’ had weirdest truth or dare in the whole world, Marinette decided.
The raid was supposed to happen on saturday. This way they were sure that Adrien would be home and there would be little interruptions. Precisely on 10:20 A.M., the time when Adrien should be practicing his piano, Ladybug, Pink Tigress, Ryuko and Viperion walked to the front gate of the Agreste Manor. Marinette did ask her father to use Ox miraculous and help them, but he politely declined. Tom felt like the hero gig was not really for him. It was okay. Not everyone need to be on the front line.
A camera eye popped out of the wall as soon as Ladybug pressed the bell.
“Hi. I have an urgent matter with Mousier Agreste. It’s about his son.” She spoke. It was risky, but if he didn’t allow them to enter, he would only raise suspicion. It was a perfect trap. Small crowd already gathered in here and got curious. Rejecting Paris’ beloved heroes would be bad for image and much too suspicious.
There was no answer, but the gate opened, letting the group in. As they walked, Ladybug and the others indeed noticed several automated defence turrets, now half-burried underground while disabled. They were probably loaded with rubber bullets, but how did this not violate gun regulations anyway was a surprise.
Doors to the manor were opened by Gorilla, who then stepped aside and let them in. Nobody noticed three shadows jumping over the front yard. Gabriel was already waiting for them with Natalie by his side.
“Ladybug. What a surprising visit. Is something wrong?” He asked in a worried tone.
“Yes. But I would prefer if we talked in somewhere more private.” Ladybug said, nudging her head toward atelier.
“Of course. Nathalie. Go check on Adrien in the meantime.” The man motioned to his secretary and let group of colorful heroes to his private study. As the doors closed he turned to the heroes. “Now. What is this urgent matter you need to discuss.”
“Like I mentioned, it’s about your son Mousier.”
“Adrien?” Gabriel grasped. “Did something happen to him? Is he in trouble?!” If Ladybug didn’t know the man as Marinette and didn’t suspect him of being hawkmoth she would actually think he cared about his son.
“Yes. He is in big big trouble.” Pink Tigress practically growled. Marinette wondered if it was the mask or was her mother always like that but she didn’t show it.
“Tigress. Control your emotions.” Ryuko scolded the newest heroine, but it was obvious she was having hard time herself.
“Ladybug. What is this all about?!” Gabriel shouted. “I demand an explanation.” He recomposed himself and fixed his tie.
“Well… Your son… He… You see…” Suddenly, the confidence Ladybug usually showed disappeared.
“What our Bug is trying to say is that we believe your son is Chat Noir.” Viperion offered some help to the distressed heroine.
“And how is that bad? If what you say is true I am proud of my son and his accomplishments in defending Paris. His mother would surely be proud.” The designer defended his son while acting confused. Except Ladybug saw right through the scene. It was too much out of character for Gabriel Agreste to be real. This confirmed it. He was Hawkmoth.
“Except Chat Noir switched sides. He is a traitor. That is why Tigress reacted like that. For some time, he is working with Hawkmoth.” Ladybug straightened up and looked in the eyes of man before her.
“What?! Perpeterous! My son would never do such thing. He was always loyal to those he considered family.”
“If you could please call him in here, I would be happy to discuss some things with him in your presence if that’s okay.” The girl in red gave a weak smile and nodded toward the intercom.
Gabriel reluctantly walked to it and pressed a button. “Nathalie. Could you please bring Adrien in here?”
It wasn’t long before the secretary and prodigal son entered the room.
“You wished to see me father?” Adrien started, but then he noticed several heroes standing in there. “Oh! Ladybug? I am honored to meet you again.” In the back, Ryuko was stopping Pink Tigress from attacking by holding hand in front of her. Viperion was doing the same for Dragon-themed hero.
“Adrien Agreste.” Ladybug started in stern tone. “As the Great Guardian of Miraculous I hereby renounce your right to the Ring of Black Cat. You are no longer a hero of Paris or part of the team.” She grabbed his hand and was about to pull the ring when he chuckled.
“So that’s it my lady? After all this time together you would end it just like that?” There was something dark in his face. “Plagg! Darkclaws out!”
Suddenly a black Kwami was sucked out of his pocket and entered the ring. In a flash of green light he was now Chat Noir, except instead his bell was now silver and his face was twisted. His features were more catlike and when he smiled he had fangs. Hearing the commotion, Gorilla barged into the room through other doors. He looked confused at the situation. He didn’t even mother with the fact that the entrance was locked and he kept holding the doorknob
“Guess there is no more hiding it Father.” Adrien said. It could very well refer to him being Chat Noir, but Gabriel understood the suggestion.
“Indeed son. Nooroo! Darkwings rise!” There was another flash of light and Hawkmoth joined the fray.
“Duusu! Spread my feathers!” Nathalie was transformed into Mayura with the help of her booch. Only no longer it was damaged so she was now able to fight in full strength.
Hawkmoth hit the floor with his cane, opening a small hole from which flew a white butterfly. “You’ve made a mistake Ladybug. Engaging me in my own home was a stupid strategy.” He then charged new Akuma and sent it at the Gorilla, who was still holding the doorknob. It entered the damaged object and transformed him into smaller version of gorizilla. “Now the chances are more fair, don’t you think?” He grinned maliciously at her.
“No. I think they will be equal about… now!” She shouted and tossed her Yo-Yo. It zoomed right past surprised Hawkmoth and Shattered the window. Through it jumped Spoiler, Red Robin and Robin, all already in battle stance.
“Ah. I see you called different help from the states. I guess I should be worried now?” The mocking tone from the villain was never that good. Suddenly, the floor on the right side lowered slightly making a ramp. From there, walked a lines of robots. “You like it? I got it from my own friend in America.” He gloated. This was not good. They needed new plan.
“Spoiler, Robin, Red Robin! I need you to take care of the robots. Tigress! Get Mayura. Ryuko. You will go after hawkmoth. Viperion! Take the Akuma out and then help Ryuko!” Ladybug started shouting new battle plans.
“What about you?”
“I will take care of Chat Noir.” She stated and lunged at the irritating cat, who just stood there the whole time with a grin on his face.
Ladybug used her Yo-Yo to attach to the roof before smashing into Chat Noir leg-first. The cat was pushed back and she proceeded with continous assault, switching between Tossing her weapon at him and using some of the moves she learned from maman over the years.
This was like a spark. Immediately after Ladybug’s charge, other heroes also attacked. The battle has begun. At least until there was an ear-piercing cry of pain that got everyone’s attention.
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Taglist (sorry if I missed you)@pheonixashtree @sassakitty @unabashedbookworm @vixen-uchiha @maggiecc12 @actualdisasterwoman @tired-butterfly @shizukiryuu @floralfi @imanerddealwith @northernbluetongue @krispydefendorpolice @toodaloo-kangaroo @dast218 @bluesoulblueheart @theatreandcomicfreak @disneyfoxuniverse @mindfulmagics @alwaysnumberonetruth @nyaabinch @jardimazul @lenamau @rosep16 @dramatic-squirrel @sonif50 @daminett4life @lulutheawkwardess @weird-pale-blonde-person @mooshoon @jeminiikrystal @mochegato @moonlightstar64 @dragonflyswing @silverwhiteraven @shamefullove @magic-miraculous @valeks-princess @heaven428 @mlbchaosqueen @winter-gardenflower @spicybelladonna @emo-elaine13 @vetilora @karukofox21 @my-name-is-michell @sturchling @lokiifriggasonn @redscarlet95 @melicmusicmagic @interobanginyourmom @the-fusionist @razzledazzle247 @miss-mysterys-blog @darkthunder1589 @i-is-mysterious @catthhay @the-one-woman-army @zestyzealot @dahjokester @write-for-your-life2 @mermaidreject @peachedpocky @sassakitty @dahjokester @crazylittlemunchkin @novicevoice @justafanwarrior @eliza-bitch @schrodingers25 @tired-butterfly @toodaloo-kangaroo @redscarlet95 @miukiiu @sassakitty @corabeth11 @vixen-uchiha
#damienette#maribat#maribat au#marinette x damian#arranged marriage au#maridami#order of the guardians#guardian!marinette#league of assassins#redeemed!chloe#evil!adrien#batman#mlb#mlb x dc#miraculous lb#miraculous ladybug#Miraculous!Sabine#tiger miraculous#fanfic#fanfiction#crossover
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Merlin Hurt/Comfort Fest 2021 Round-Up
A huge thank you to those who have contributed to the Merlin Hurt/Comfort Fest! In case you missed them, you can find a link to the fantastic fanworks below ❤️
If you’d like to hang out and chat about Merlin stuff with other fanwork creators, you can join us on Discord (18+) for other events such as Writing Sprint Weekends and more!
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Fanfiction
Title: To Be The Last Creator: TheCourtSorcerer Rating: Teen & Up Length/Medium: 1,915 words Pairing(s): Merlin/Arthur Pendragon Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply; Mentions of Parental Death. Summary: Something was wrong with Merlin. “Something is wrong with you,” Arthur voiced his thoughts after zero consideration for how the words may sound. –OR– It’s the that time of year again, the time when Balinor died. And even after all these years, Merlin grieves what could have been had he not lost his father as soon as he got him those years ago. Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29151606
+ + + Title: The silver lining of silence Creator: ListenToThat Rating: G Length: 2332 Pairing(s): Merlin & Arthur Warning(s): Temporary disability (deafness/hard of hearing) Summary: When Arthur wakes up, his world is engulfed in dull silence. His roommate doesn’t know about this. Arthur attempts to keep it that way. Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29354220 + + + Title: Just Like We Always Do Creator: TheCourtSorcerer Rating: Mature Length: 4,400 words Pairing(s): Merlin/Arthur Warning(s): Major Character Death (not actually, though, no one actually dies, it’s not real, but just to be safe here’s the warning) Summary: Merlin and Arthur spend some time teaching at Hogwarts under aliases, until one day it all goes wrong and they’re exposed in a painful way. ——– “Wait! Arthur! Don’t open that!” Merlin exclaimed suddenly, rushing to Arthur’s side at the chest behind the desk. “What? Why? You just told me I could!” Arthur shouted back, sounding panicked by Merlin’s tone. It was too late, though, he had already started opening it. Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29580096 + + + Title: No Hands Had Ever Been So Gentle, Nor So Deadly Creator: @queerofthedagger Rating: Teen and Up Length/Medium: 3,400 words Pairing: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon Warnings: None Summary: “You really came. It wasn’t a dream,” Arthur eventually whispers, and he sounds so, so fragile. Merlin has a hard time breathing, and it’s not because of Arthur’s weight; the thought that none of this would’ve happened if not for him hasn’t left him alone all night. It’s all the more tangible with Arthur clinging to the shreds of his composure. “I’m sorry,” he says, his voice cracking with how much he means it. Arthur’s kidnapped. Of course, Merlin comes to find him, but getting Arthur out might’ve been the easiest part. Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29672055 + + + Title: I should have… Creator: Chibi / @babybird-merlin Rating: Teen and Up Length: 2,309 words Pairing: None / Merlin & Arthur Pendragon Warnings: Physical Punishment Summary: Based upon the comment Uther makes in episode 7 of season 1 (Gates of Avalon): "If this was a time of war, I would have you flogged." This takes place at the end of the episode where instead of ending in the stocks again, Uther is sick of Merlin's behavior and has him flogged right there and then in the Throne Room. Needless to say that Arthur is less than impressed by his fathers order and after all is said and done, he takes Merlin to his room to look after the boy. This can be read as either Merthur or bromance (like in the actual series) Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29490810 + + + Title: Honey & Hemlock Creator: TheCourtSorcerer Rating: Mature Length/Medium: 15,960 words Pairing(s): Merlin/Arthur Pendragon Warning(s): Anxiety, Panic attacks, very brief scene featuring the sacrifice of one’s own life for ritual purposes (very very brief, not heavily described and non-graphic, not a Merlin Character) Summary: “When you said the Sorceress didn’t spell you. You were lying. I know you were, you did that weird nose flare thing you do when you lie. What did she do, Arthur?” Arthur tensed. Did he really have such a tell? Damn Merlin and always being able to read Arthur like children’s book. “It doesn’t matter,” Arthur sighed in defeat, “She tried to something but it clearly didn’t work. I’m perfectly fine, as Gaius said, and when she finished speaking, she collapsed to the ground, dead. Her magic backfired and killed her instead of me, I suppose.” He purposefully left out the part about the gold and the touch and the constant buzzing beneath his skin. He was sure it was nothing, and he knew it would only worry Merlin further. When out with his Knights and Merlin, Arthur is targeted by a vengeful Sorceress (per usual), and struck by a spell with…Unusual effects. Dangerous effects. Faced with a fearful challenge, a treasonous secret to keep, Arthur let’s Merlin in to help him, only to discover Merlin could help more than he would have thought. Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29751504 + + + Thanks again to everyone who participated. We salute you! Feel free to check out all the offerings and leave them some love! ♥
#merlin#merlin fanfic#merthur#merthur fanfic#merlin fests#tavernfest#merlinhcfest#quest: merlin hurt/comfort fest#masterlist: quest 2#quest: 2
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Beth and UARF!Billy - ❤♡❥ღ💕💘💝💓💌💟💙💚💜💛
Heart-Eyes || -
Five A.M.
Beth’s barely awake as she comes into the office, coffee in hand, only to come face to face with the widest grin she has ever seen on Hal Gates’ face. Dark eyes dancing, he relieves her of her thermos cup, takes both her arms in his hands, and swing-dances her around the cramped space where they work.
“We’ve done it, girl!”
Though abjectly confused, Beth can’t help but grin in return. “Wha’ve we done?” She wants to be just as thrilled, wants to share in the old man’s joy. “We’ve got data on white pointer mating! I’m running the compile now, we should be able to parse it and watch the video footage within an hour or two!”
She’s floored.
The shock is clear on her face, even her mouth drops open a little. Often bandied about as the Holy Grail of marine biology, great-white mating is known to exist. Despite decades of research into the habits of the species, that particular bit of knowledge has eluded marine biologists.
“Wha...? How?”
“Mate of mine, Crawford down in New Zealand has taken a fisherman’s eye-witness account on our elusive little friends, and shared video. Crawford sent me all of the data.”
“Oh, Hal.”
Dr Gates nods at her eagerly and once again promenades her around some tables, brushing past a stack of hastily shoved aside folders with charts of migration patterns, weather reports, and feeding data. Then, far more carefully, he hands her into a seat and plops down into an office chair, slapping his knees in pleasure and pride.
“Speaking of mating rituals...”
Beth laughs but blushes at the same time, eyes askance. She suddenly knows what he’s going to ask, or at least of whom.
“...And since we have so little to do until all the research is collated and complied...”
“Must we?”
“No finer time, girl.”
She holds her hands up to stave him off until she gets up, crosses the room and takes a sip of her coffee. Not exactly how she wanted to start the day, but there’s no real reason not to humour her mentor.
“Have at, den.”
“Excellent.” Hal Gates really is an inveterate old gossip.
~*~
❤: who is more affectionate in public? in private?
Beth laughs. Okay, so this isn’t really so bad. “I t’ink I gotta say...I’m more affectionate in public. Mos’ of da time, Doctah Manderly... just doesn’t know what t’ do. Very stiff, hands in his pockets or stand at parade rest.”
The last cocktail party had been a half disaster, between trying to get William to mingle with the public attendees and not leave to check on his seals at first opportunity. The one time he surprised her was when he put a hand on the small of her back though the illusion was broken when she found that the six-foot-six man was trying to ultimately hide behind her. No amount of mock-tails were going to spare him any acute discomfort.
“Probably for da best. No offence, but he’s very definitely...ah....British.”
“None taken.” Hal offers her a wink and taps the side of his nose.
“But even behind close doors? He just... lil uptight, I guess. I sometimes wonder if mebbe he’s worried about havin’ an episode, and some affections are difficult when you have a service dog nearly t’ree-quarters ya size intent on doin’ her job, but I’d say he at least tries when it jus’ da two of us. Fingahs in my hair, brush against my arm. Da kine.”
Hal nods, knowing the specifics without having to drag them out of her.
♡: who is the bigger romantic openly? secretly?
"I t’ink,” she begins, carefully considering this one. “Dat anyone who loves da sea so much dat dey would give up a whole life to dedicate demself to it...got a big romantic soul. What is da ocean, if not love an’ life, an’ all dat we dream of in songs an’ poetry? I only t’ink it’s harder for him to express dat because well..”
She makes a dismissive gesture.
It isn’t that he grasps the concepts of language and expression, they’ve certainly entertained passionate arguments, verbal jousts that have filled the air with sign and countersign.
“Romantically speakin’ I jus’ don’ see him as da type dat I’m gonna find outside my window wi’ an ole boom box, playing In Ya Eyes by Petah Gabriel, ya know? But I also don’t believe he wouldn’t t’ink about it. So secretly? Him. Openly, me.”
❥: who is more likely to plan something big for valentine's day?
“Honestly, Hal...I’d have t’ say him. He’s a planner. Wants every detail to be perfect, will second guess himself a hundred times jus’ to make sure dere no wrinkle in the research. Me? Always been da spontaneous kine, except when it came to really wantin’ to work wit’ you.”
Hal pats her lap, his face soft.
ღ: who is more likely to initiate hand-holding in public?
“Again, it would be William. I don’ know wha’ he’s t’inkin’ a lot of da time, if he’s even aware dat I am dere sometimes. An’ I don’ really wanna make a big deal about it, don’ wanna ovahstep. For me, it’s a much more difficult proposition, is like...touch is where I’m most comfortable, outside of typing endless notes or readin’ data.”
She nods toward the words scrolling along the screen. She fully disclosed her disabilities when she applied for the position so thankfully she doesn’t have to explain now. Most of the other people at the facility don’t even really notice. Except for maybe Ben who sees too much and maybe says too little. That’s to be expected though when you gather a bunch of scientists and stick them in one beautiful place.
“You want him to initiate more, don’t you?”
“I would, yeah. But dere always more important kine and so really guess it nevah really matter.”
💕: who is more likely to make huge declarations of love in front of other people?
“Fair question an’ I guess dat would be me. We...we agreed not to make a big t’ing about any of dis, you know how quirky everyone here is, an’ in case it doesn’t work out, we don’ want da kine t’ get weird. Especially wi’ James an’ Miranda. So if somet’ing like dis were t’ happen it’s probably because he push all my buttons an’ my tempah got da best of me, right? Could see it happenin’ over breakfast. On da beach. Mebbe by da pools.”
Which is why she tries so hard to keep her passions in check. She doesn’t want to blurt out anything that can’t be taken back.
💘: who developed a crush on the other first?
“Couldn’t say,” and in those two words it is the breadth and depth of her honesty. Beth doesn’t have crushes in the same way most people do. She’s never seen anyone and instantly found herself immersed in fantasies, desires, a desperate need to be around them. She might find someone intellectually stimulating and enjoy the conversation. She might notice that something about them calls to her artist’s eye and be aesthetically pleasing in its symmetry, someone might make her laugh but she doesn’t dwell. And by the time there is the first inkling that she might want more out of a situation or relationship, she’s already become close friends. Or she watches as that object of her affection drifts beyond reach and she tells herself she’s happy because they clearly needed something more than she’s even capable of giving.
And sometimes, Beth wonders if she isn’t really broken or damaged in some way. Because she can’t even say she ever had a crush on Billy. She doesn’t know that she can say she has any expectations other than they look good together on paper, and it’s been drilled into her since birth that appearances *do* matter. “Mo’beddah you should ask him.” Gates doesn’t say anything, he only nods.
💝: who spends more time (possibly overthinking) what presents to get the other?
“William. For same-same reasons as Valentines Day, an’ da need for everyt’ing to be as exactin’ as he can make it. Like, how hard and how long it take him to find...or more likely, *breed* dem two purple neocardinas in my office?” Shrimp like the two in her tank, deliriously happy and spoiled and free of predators, are rare in size and colour, and yet… there they are. Then there’s the allegorical evidence of his severe and frothing dislike of mass consumption marketing, the complete commercialisation of every secular and religious holiday, the pastiche of feelings tacked on almost like an afterthought.
💓: who initiates most physical contact?
Beth hesitates. That’s slightly more personal than the other questions so far and truth be told she’s a little ashamed of having to answer without specific parameters. But it is a question, and she did agree to answer them with the same honesty as she offers Hal in all their other work and conversations. “I’ve always done well wi’ sensory input dat was based in kine oddah dan auditory. Smell, taste, seeing… but of alla dem, touch has always been important to me. Textures, near imperceptible data processed t’rough skin. An’ I guess dat I use dat wi’ him. Way to express ideas or sensations dat might not come across ordinarily. Enthusiasm, excitement, humour, rage, disappointment. I wan him to feel an’ understand when I don’ have da words in me, or know how to express. A lot of da time, it’s accidental or at least….subconscious.” A beat goes by. “I don’t believe he really cares much for it.”
💌: who is more likely to send cutesy texts to the other?
This one is hard for her to answer because they aren’t really cutesy text people. Most of their days are too filled with very real world drama, service to the greater good, the understanding and conservation of the most vulnerable environments and animals within. There’s weather, there’s reports, there’s an entire litany of experiences that don’t leave much time to play around until well after hours when they can finally seek well deserved liberty. However, Billy does sometimes send her pictures of the seals doing very cute seal things, or Annie shepherding him and his charges with the boss-vibes of the Queen Mother. In the end she only offers her mentor a smile and a shrug.
💟: who spends time reading their zodiac compatibilities?
“Oh absolutely I do. Find da whole pseudo-science of it fascinatin’, especially when da stars are not in da same position as dey were when it was invented an’ da psychological impact it has on our species is jus’ totally wild, you know?”
Beth knows that she’s the textbook definition of a Cancerian woman, and Billy does a good job providing a counter-argument on being a Libra. Further there’s a bit of an annoyance factor; he thinks junk science ‘belongs in the bottom of the bin with the rest of the rubbish.’ And he has a point, to some extent, even if she doesn’t agree with him. Not everything can be cold facts and numbers. Sometimes a little playfulness was in order and he absolutely needed to be reminded of that.
Hal laughs and shakes his head. “You’re going to do my chart then, aren’t you?” “Wit’out a doubt, Doctah Gates.” She wiggles her brows.
💙: who is more protective?
“I think objectively, I am. You know William’s troubles, and I have to keep them all in mind dough it’s not like he can forget dem, right? Some of his facts aren’t… I’ve consulted with some medical doctors and if we are careful, dere’s a lot he can experience dat he sees out of reach but I don’ like bringing dem up because I don’ want to agitate him. Only can lead t’ problems.” She does wish though that he’d trust her a little more, that he’d let go of some of his well deserved fears. That he’d let himself out of his shell and accept that even with limitations he can do many of the same things as the rest of the group does. But he seems content enough to hang back, ever the observer. And she doesn’t know if it’s her place to try to drag him into things though she might be better at it than anyone else. Miranda has told her as much.
💚: who tends to get sick more often? who is better at taking care of the other?
Hal’s question is really a continuation of the previous one and once again she has to call Billy out on it. Because she’s never really been sick a day in her life, not since early childhood and the culmination of that was the test bite that nearly lost her the leg she keeps tucked away, hidden out of sight whenever possible. “Dat seems a small kine ingenious, he no can help his seizure disorder. An’ I feel like he really ought to have a good psychologist. I t’ink some t’erapy would do him good. Spends too much time in his own head an’ mebbe not enough taking charge of his life. I know he can be afraid of lots of t’ings but it nevah really *has* to be dat way. But I also don’ wanna push him, for same-same reasons I mention before. You can lead a shark to chum but no can make him frenzy, know what I mean?” The analogy is silly. Billy wants so much more than what he feels he has. And a darker current in the back of her mind wonders if they would still be the same if he felt he could reasonably have them. That feels so selfish and toxic and she really has no place casting judgement on him when maybe she’s no better off than he is, only expressing it differently.
💜: who said "i love you" first? or, if neither has said it yet, who is more likely to say it first?
It’s strange how perceptive he is and goes in for the killing bite. The honest truth is that neither one has said it. And neither one likely will. Billy has layers of guilt and trauma, has beliefs that she cannot get a single foothold to try and tear apart. He doesn’t feel deserving of such a finer emotion. And Beth? She has her own reasons. She doesn’t even know if love is a thing that exists or if it’s some fairy-tale people tell themselves to make it easier to get by. She believes in affection, and she believes that people bond the same way packs and pods and herds do. But she feels the concept of love is poisonous. Ruinous in the way it can destroy someone from the inside out. And how any time she’s ever thought she’d felt it, it was ripped out from her grasp. She won’t say it. She won’t hear it.
She doesn’t answer him immediately, but instead gets up and paces away, appearing as though she’s checking on some of the cameras situated around the bay. The wall that she’d left down for Hal goes back up, slamming into place.
“Research from both psychology and neurology fields have found that there are twelve different areas of the brain that light up and work together when two people are attracted to one another, releasing chemicals like dopamine, adrenaline, oxytocin and vasopression. All the symptoms people experience are simply animal-instincts provided to guarantee that we as a species survive by either wanting to mate, or flee.”
💛: who believes in soulmates?
And Gates understands he’s made an error in judgement, though he’d only been trying to be helpful in a meddling kind of way. Anyone at the facility could see that Billy and Beth were two sides of a very quirky but ultimately needed coin. That they’d both changed each other in the two years she’d been a research fellow, and how they’d both blossomed for it. Well, anyone but the two of them. And this had seemed like such a good idea at first, tied into shark mating habits which he’d hoped she’d take better than she is.
Her answers have thus far matched up quite nicely with the boy’s.
Sadly, especially this one. She doesn’t turn to look at him. “There are no such things, Doctor Gates. And even if there were, statistically it would be almost impossible to meet a soul mate. Within the same general age group there are about a half a billion potential companions all over the world. One would have to travel the entirety of the world, every remote pocket of the planet. Secondly, there’s no scientific proof that souls even exist, and enough studies across various disciplines to prove that they don’t. Believing in such nonsense only makes a person unhappy. And all that aside, most mammals are not biologically programmed for monogamy and I doubt human beings are either.” Because if they were, why would anyone leave someone they claimed to love?
#Mahalo!Crow <3333#A Star to Sail Her By|Doctor William Manderly#No Man's Land|Billy and Beth#Urca Aquarium and Research Facility#Aloha'aina|Hawai'i
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Interrupted
Q’s video conference gets interrupted by a half naked man wielding a cat...
Inspired by the multitude of wonderful fanart featuring Q and Bond in front of a computer, some clothed, some not quite 😉. And also by stories of zoom call accidents.
Tags: Freshly established relationship. Breaking the news.
-------------
“…How much progress are we making in regards to the drag coefficient?” is the next question on Q’s mind as he reviews the R&D stage-gate checklist. Q has his attention on the tablet in front of him, marking up the design drawing with a stylus. The image is shared onscreen with the other three participants of the call.
“Wind tunnel test results are back, the best we’ve achieved so far is using V308 design, but as expected it does come with some compromise to practicality—”
At R’s sudden pause, Q looks up and turns towards the screen displaying the participants’ video feed.
“Sorry R I didn’t catch that, you might have cut out for a moment.” He adjusts the wireless earbuds in case they’ve come loose.
Jenny’s image smiles widely and the others follow suit. “Sir, did you adopt a new kitty?”
The unexpected question prompts him to look around his desk. He spies Spot lounging out of view of the webcam, by his favourite window perch having just had breakfast. Q assumes the other black and white cat, Jellicles must be somewhere under Spot’s large orange lump.
“Uh, no?” he is a little discomfited, not knowing what brought on the bizarre tangent in the discussion.
“Boss, you sure about this? He’s a big one. Might eat you out of house and home,” Nish joins in the ribbing.
“Granted he’s a silent killer. Any unwanted gifts dropped off on your carpet yet?” Jamila this time.
“What on earth are you all talking about—,“ in his own video feed minimised out of the way on the bottom right corner, Q finally catches sight of movement in the background.
The problem with open plan living Q notices for the first time, is the lack of privacy. Not an issue if you’re living alone, but when you have house guests, it makes it trickier. Q’s webcam faces the dining area where Agent 007 is currently making a spectacle of himself. His shirtless muscular back is half turned to them. The light grey sweatpants he is wearing slung dangerously low on his hips - the tops of his well sculpted glutes artfully exposed.
Bond had wandered absently into the dining area, one arm cradling a restless black and white cat to his chest like a baby, but his attention is focused on the tablet held in his other hand. Jellicles is not happy at being ignored - headbutting Bond under the chin and attempting repeatedly to bop the human on the nose to get his attention.
When the agent is sufficiently annoyed, he locks eyes with the cat for a moment before tipping his head to smush his nose against cat’s forehead - which causes Jellicles to meow loudly in reply.
Q turns back to look at his monitor, all three participants on the call are staring in open-mouthed shock. He searches his desk for something to throw; a squishy stress toy in the shape of a cow would suffice. Q aims for the torso, but the toy bounces comically off Bond’s rock hard arse instead.
That catches Bond’s attention and he turns around - Q regrets not thinking this one through. He and his little audience are now treated to the frontal view, which is arguably even more distracting. The agent’s golden tan glows in the morning light - accentuating the definition of his well developed pectorals all the way to the rippling planes of the chiseled abdominals and the blonde trail of hair peeking out of the waistband. Further below, the soft cotton blend material of the sweatpants does little to hide the endowments underneath.
Bond raises a quizzical eyebrow at him. He’d put the tablet down and caught one of the cat’s paws in his hand in the interim - to stop it from trying to touch his nose and was kissing each little toe-bean before the interruption. Bond is in a fantastic mood this morning and Jellicles must adore him enough to allow such manhandling.
Q scowls at him and mouths ‘I’m on a call’ while using a hand to gesture at his monitor and the webcam. Bond’s expression turns apologetically wide-eyed for a second in acknowledgment of his little gaffe. But in the next moment, he appears to brush it off -hanged for a sheep as a lamb-.
Instead of ducking out of view, he takes four purposeful strides towards Q’s desk, the cat still in his arms. Q can’t decide if disabling his video would cause more suspicion or if they should just cease with the charade - somehow ‘he’s just a friend who sleeps over and cuddles my cats’ defence doesn’t quite stack up at this point.
Behind him now and without a trace of shame, Bond bends over a shoulder to wink at the three familiar faces in the monitor. Q resists the urge to slap the man away, opting instead to glower at him. The agent senses a rebuke forthcoming, so preemptively uses the cat as a shield. He holds the black and white cat up to the webcam, then pushes the cat in front of Q’s face - Jellicles doesn’t disappoint, immediately latching on and playfully chewing on Q’s nose.
“Ah! James!” Q tries to flinch away. The assault is over in seconds when Bond pulls the cat away but then unexpectedly returns to peck Q on the corner of his mouth before he can even protest. When Bond straightens again, the expansive view of naked chest and abs fills up most of the right side of Q’s video feed.
Q has to half turn and physically nudge the agent away with a splayed hand against warm hard muscle. The touch a searing reminder of their activities the night before. Bond is immovable when he doesn’t want to be moved, but he relents after a second or two. His parting gift, was to dip down and nuzzle Q in the hair, using the misdirection to hook a finger around the collar of Q’s jumper, exposing the top of a well bruised collarbone. The hand then slips to caress a long line down his chest to his stomach.
“James! Will you stop it!” Q hisses. His next reaction is to stab the bastard in the side with the blunt tip of the tablet stylus to salvage his ruined modesty. The man is a menace!
The bloody peacock doesn’t even have the decency to retreat out of camera view after that, instead he claims a seat in the dinning area, beaming with a satisfied smile. The cat now balanced on his stomach and chest, he moves another chair around so he can prop his legs on it and stretch out, putting himself on blatant display. An artist would beg to paint such a perfect tableau. Q wants to taser the smile off his face.
Q clears his throat, not daring to look directly at his colleagues - too flustered to offer an explanation as to why 007 was molesting him in his home. So he tries ineffectively for the pretend-it-didnt-happen route, “Um… Right. Where were we? Jenny, the wind tunnel results?....”
Jamila blinks furiously. Nish makes a hoarse croaking, “Whaaaa…..” like air escaping his lungs.
And R… well R just says, “Sir, I think I speak for everyone here that we’re traumatised by what we just saw, bloody traumatised. We don’t think we can continue with today’s discussion until a satisfactory explanation has been provided...” R forces Q into a corner. Two other heads nod their support for Jenny’s statement. None of them appear disapproving - but it is guaranteed they are going to take the mickey out of him.
There is no way he is going to spill tea with Bond still within earshot. The agent’s ego is unmanageable as it is. “If I promise to reveal all on Monday, can we please get on with this?” Q tries to make his whisper sound imperious to no avail - a half naked man lounging in the background tends to undermine one’s authority.
“Health & Safety would disagree. It’s an occupational hazard you know, to be distracted around dangerous lab equipment,” Jamila points out. The others agree. Mutiny from his top three.
“How is my personal life -your- distraction?”
“When there is a not inconsiderable pot waiting to be distributed. Come on boss, there’s still time for me to collect my winnings if things go my way,” Nish begs while consulting his phone for the records.
“So… he’s -James- now is he? Is this a one time slumber party or an extended sleepover?” R powers through heedless.
Q considers his answer, he is marginally aware of the betting pool around the stupid game ‘Fluster the Quartermaster’ and its various derivative odds regarding which agent, the timeline, where, method of burn etc. - but he doesn’t want to know the specifics as he wants to maintain plausible deniability should it implode in everyone’s faces.
Bond is still playing with he cat in the background, trying to teach it commands. Q doesn’t want to say it out loud, so he types it into the group chat on the side of the screen:
::We’re moving his things over later today.::
“Called it!” Jenny slams a hand on the table and punches the air in victory. Oh she knew it! Q taking the Friday off (or any day off for that matter) that had nothing to do with his cats was enough cause for intrigue.
But after the suspiciously expensive gift in the form of the red Hyundai a few months ago, it was just a matter of time. It was not the cost that was the issue, Bond’s wardrobe of bespoke suits probably cost more than the car several times over - it was the sentiment behind it that gave Jenny the courage to place a sizeable bet on them taking the next step towards cohabitation. The car, she read correctly in Bond’s weird wooing language was tantamount to an engagement ring.
Nish and the others weren’t as good as reading signs, so majority of the odds were still focused around the early stages “NO! What? Wait… When did this happen? What about first date? First snog? First shag?” Nish scrolls furiously through his phone.
The bets have taken a far more intrusive route than Q had ever expected. “Well I’m sorry my personal life does not follow the path of standard operating procedure… now can we -please- move on?” He’s acutely aware that he is blushing bright pink from head to toe.
Jenny shakes her head, the only person that would dare to override him, “Q, you took the day off - so take the day off. The prototype can wait. No emergencies at the moment, the castle is still standing. We’ll call if something pops up. Now bugger off and enjoy your day with -James-!”
*Sigh* Q rubs his temples and gives in reluctantly, “Fine! Yes, alright…” . He knows when something is a lost cause and the news is likely to cause a buzz in Q-Branch that would last the whole weekend - there goes department productivity. He’d hoped to come up with a less sensational way of disseminating the news. He expects massive ribbing on Monday.
“Oh! Permission to inform Ms Moneypenny about the change in status?” Jenny asks. The girls are having drinks tonight and it would be hell trying to conceal anything from Eve.
“No no! I’ll… inform her myself... and please try to keep this within Q-Branch, for now?” Eve would find seven ways of killing him if she had to find out from someone else. She’d already ripped into him, calling him a bloody clueless twit when she’d found out about the car Bond bought him as a ‘birthday gift’. As cars go, it was a cheap one - but Bond’s logic to get him to accept it was the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to him.
When they’ve all signed off, Q shuts down the computer and lets himself be drawn back into the life inside his flat. Balanced on Bond’s stomach, Jellicles has miraculously learned how to give high-fives on command.
“Get dressed please. I’d like breakfast before we head over to your place.” Q tell him as he passes behind the agent. He places a hand on James’ shoulder, causing the agent to tip his head back. Q drops a kiss on his forehead.
“By the way, have you told Eve about… this?” Q asks as he combs his fingernails across Bond’s scalp.
“Mmm… Not yet. Was thinking of letting her know on Monday.” Bond mutters, eyes closed. The relaxed blissed out look on his face was worth enduring a million papercuts.
“Well, that’ll be too late. Since you’ve gone and announced it with as much discretion as you conduct your missions…,” Q tugs firmly at Bond’s ears as reprimand, ”…the whole of Q-Branch will know before morning tea. Which means Eve will find out by lunch.”
Just then Q’s phone on the dinning table buzzes with an incoming call. They both pause to stare at the screen. Caller ID displays ::Moneypenny:: ominously.
“I’ll get dressed. You tell her… She called me a dithering halfwit just last week.” Bond straightens before bolting for the bedroom.
“Coward!” Q yells at him. He steels himself to answer the phone. When he does, he all but squeaks, “Hello Eve?—“
——— FIN————
Notes: The mention about the car gift is from another fic of mine and can be found here - Car troubles and Not Quite Dates.
If you liked this fic, there’s more like it on the blog. Enjoy!
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Memories
A short drabble I wrote for @razzle-zazzle‘s Blinded AU, a bit of calmness in a sea of all the angst I love to write (I hope you like it, Zaz!)
Months after the events of the Sons’ of Garmadon, promptly getting thrown into the First-Realm followed by the Oni invasion, there hadn’t been much time to just... sit down and think. Think about what had happened with Ultra Violet and the last thing Cole ever saw before his vision went blank.
And what followed.
1520 words
Cole had sat himself down, outside, just barely within the courtyard of the monastery. It was good to be back, to have so much time to just be at a place he considered home; the sunlight warm on his face as it flowed through the gap in the wall that the open gates provided and the feeling of stones and gravel under his bare palms was abrasive but tactile, calming as he carefully moved the pads of his fingers over the small ridges.
Getting banished to a whole other realm, coming back and then getting thrown into a new problem and an entirely new battle - two in fact, Garmadon and then the Oni, it had been hard for everyone. No time for a break, not really. That was the life of a Ninja.
Taxing in every way, but when they finally got some down time?
Time to relax without a world ending problem taking up every moment of the day. Time that Cole could use to just enjoy the light breeze as the day slowly delved into its evening state, the sun dipping below the horizon. He could feel it, the chill as shadows stretched over him inch by inch and the warm line of the dipping light.
Until his attention was drawn away. Maybe it was the shift in the air beside his head, or the slight tremors running through the ground, or even the light breathing he could hear. And he could hear it, easily. Better than he could have done a few mere months back.
The only issue was, he wasn't the best at differentiating anything yet, even after going so long without his sight. He could sense people, sense movement and depth, but nothing much past that. Though he was learning gradually.
It seemed like years since he'd ever seen anything, when in reality it had been months.
"You've been sitting out here for most of the day." Came a croaky, soft voice. Wu.
The scrape of the bo staff on the ground confirmed his suspicions. How had he not noticed that?
Cole smiled, and gave a short nod. "It's nice. The weather has been pretty good over the past few days, Sensei. And, you know, we don't always have time to sit and enjoy it."
It was a weird but welcomed dynamic change that they'd all experienced during their run-ins with the Sons' of Garmadon, and then the escapade through the First Realm. They had their master back, after so long. After wavering hope and doubt that he was even still alive, or even in their own present day anymore.
But being there, raising him from the baby he had been stuck as, it... Was odd.
Cole felt like he'd learnt more about Wu from caring for the man as a child than he had with all the years training under the mysterious Sensei.
"I noticed you aren't wearing your blindfold." it was said with a questioning tone, and the crinkle of fabric and a huffed out breath followed, Wu sat down.
Cole shrugged, "It's not like I need it up here. No one to scare with my lack of eyes." He chuckled, humour. It helped him work through trauma, and it was trauma. There had been time between the initial injury and present day, but that didn't negate from what he'd experienced. The pain of the spelled blade, the heat, the burning, the smell. It made his stomach roll just thinking about it. He swallowed hard, around a sudden lump in his throat.
Sensei Wu seemed to pick up on the motion, there was movement. Cole just turned his head in the Sensei's general direction and smiled. He didn't know what the injury looked like, but he knew it wasn't good. It never had looked good really, all it had done was heal thankfully without an infection and the perpetual ache had subsided. Zane had told him one night, when they'd gotten to talking on the roof of the monastery, that it looked like raised skin. Discoloured, scarred, some areas lighter, some a lot darker. That his eyes, well, his eyelids had healed closed but he knew that there was nothing behind them. Cole knew that, he couldn't feel anything there. He couldn't see. He'd describe it as blackness, but in reality it was literally nothing at all. As much as anyone could see if they asked what they saw from their elbow.
"I remember the day you found me." Wu said plainly, abruptly. Cole felt himself pause, one eyebrow raising. "When I was a baby." He elaborated.
Cole frowned, "You remember... Being a baby?"
"You have to understand, what I was subject to was not normal development. I went from a young child to an adolescent youth in the matter of a few hours. I remember everything."
The earth ninja couldn't help but blow out a heavy breath. "So you remember..?"
Wu paused, as if thinking over how he was going to word what he was going to say. Or even if he should say it. "I remember the blood." He stated. "That covered most of the injury but I supposed it made it look worse than it was."
"I don't know Sensei, it felt pretty bad." Cole laughed lightly.
He felt a tap of the bo staff on his shoulder and huffed. If he still had eyes, he'd roll them.
"I know you remember it too. More so, in fact."
It was a prompt, an opening to speak about something that he resolutely avoided in lieu of other problems.
Cole swallowed hard , "I remember the pain. The fact that the last thing I ever saw was stone walls and Ultra Violet diving at me with the knife." He whispered, their surroundings seemed to follow suit. Birds became quiet, cicadas in the grass stopped their chirping. It was like the world took a breath. "Everything flashed white, and then nothing. I remember coming around and you were making baby noises. I... Could feel everything. The blood, the burns, I honestly…" Cole's voice fell below a whisper, "I wanted to cry but I couldn't." He ducked his head.
"And amongst all of that, you still got me and yourself to safety."
"Sensei--"
"You put everything that had happened to the back of your mind, you adapted to the situation and you found your way to safety, even without your vision."
Cole cleared his throat and shook his head. He could feel a catch in his voice, and he knew if he spoke again it would break, just as he had yet to do so over the situation
Yet he did, "Why're you mentioning this now?"
"Because you need to hear it." Wu said plainly. "You need to know that you're not alone with this. And even though I may be a crotchety old man," Cole smirked, and received a harder staff tap to the back of his head. He winced and brought his hand up to rub the knock.
"I am your mentor, and I'm here to talk to. Just as your brothers are."
There was a light breeze and Cole hefted a heavy breath, nodding slowly to the words. They made sense, and he had heeded them before. If the conversation was broached, he would talk about what happened. He was doing so now. Bottling emotions wasn't exactly his forte, he was more for waiting until there was time to let them out. The only issue was free time rarely came. "I'm fine, Sensei. Really. I'm okay. And I'm sorry you remembered what happened."
"Apologies from those who are not at fault get neither party anywhere but closer to understanding each other. It is not your fault that what you experienced was traumatic. It is not your fault that I remember what happened."
"Sensei, I don't get what point you're trying to make." Cole admitted slowly as he pulled his legs up against his chest.
"What I'm saying is, eyesight or not, safety or peril, your immediate action upon getting grievously injured was to protect someone else. To protect me, whether you knew who I was or not. It's why I chose you Cole, all those years back on that mountain top."
Cole paused, listened.
"Because when all seems lost and hopeless, when you're in pain, you still put others first. You do the right thing, to the detriment of yourself." Wu stood, using his staff as support. "Whilst putting yourself in harm's way, I don't advise; your heart is always in the right place."
He felt a hand rest on his shoulder, the touch firm but gentle. Cole couldn't help but give a small smile.
"It's why you're the leader, and why you continue to be the one everyone looks to."
"Sensei--"
Sensei Wu paused, presumably looking back, not that Cole could tell easily. "Disability does not equal to inability. You are proof of that, Cole. You work with your circumstances, you are every bit the person you used to be and more.
"I am here to thank you. And to tell you that I am very proud of who you've become."
-
AO3
#Ninjago#lego ninjago#cole#cole brookstone#cole ninjago#fanfiction#Sensei Wu#razzle-zazzle's Blinded AU#mcfanely writes#mcfanely
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“K - THE FIRST STORY” (Novel)
CHAPTER 1: THE BOY NAMED ISANA YASHIRO (Part 3)
Translation: Naru-kun Raws: Ridia
* Prologue / Chapter 1 (Part 01 / 02)
The boy spread his arms and legs and stretched.
"Japan is a peaceful country."
He feels sleepy and tired.
The boy who swims between reality and dreams saw a golden light in the dark.
Who is…?
A very tall man was in the golden light. An old man with a strict gaze. He has a hard body and his back is straight. An old man with terrifying intimidation and terrifying atmosphere, but the boy felt the nostalgic light of his light.
The old man opened his mouth.
"This country is over, Weissmann."
It was a heavy voice. It was like scolding and begging for something.
Suddenly, he hears someone laugh.
When he noticed, there was a man in his twenties and a white man who had long silver hair on his back and was smiling mysteriously.
Looking at the silver-haired man, the boy felt as if his head was shaking.
This is different from nostalgia. However, the intense sensation of seeing and discomfort builds up, making the lower stomach feel uncomfortable.
Quickly, the boy opened his eyes.
On the rooftop of the school, it seems that the boy had a strange dream at this time.
He was suddenly surprised by what happened, but the kitten who had curled up due to the boy's weakness, withdrew.
"Now... what did you say?"
The boy asked the kitten that way, but the kitten tilts its neck.
It is not surprising. There is no way for a cat to speak. First of all, this is just a dream.
The boy was able to fight for a fortune in a strange dream that was different from the sad dream it did not remember this morning.
He returned to the classroom at the last minute of class, but everyone in the classroom was humming with their thoughts, and it wasn't as if the class was starting soon. The boy bows his head.
"How about class?"
Mishina, who was working in the front seat, has an astonished face.
“Preparation for the school festival in the afternoon. Work hard!"
That was. It was less than a week before the school festival. The Ashinaka School festival, commonly known as Gakuen Island, which is a gigantic school, is a festival that literally lists the entire island, and the budget and enthusiasm are enormous.
To ensure that no one other than relevant persons can enter and exit the school island, you cannot enter inside the island gate without a student pass or a staff pass installed on the PDA. It is a mechanism that remains. However, on the day of the festival, the door will open and visitors from outside freely.
The Ashinaka School Festival is not just a school festival; it is also a great event that the general public outside the school is looking forward to.
All of the students took the school festival seriously with the goal of not only creating their own memories but also entertaining the people, and in December, when the school festival is held, there were often days when internal students were given allowed preparation work until midnight.
The fact that the school festival is held in December is a little different, but this is because the school festival on Gakuen Island is held at the same time as the annual shrine festival on the island.
The boy looked around the classroom. Everyone seems to be busy practicing theater, making costumes, combining costumes, and various gatherings. When he was watching the scene without help, Kukuri quickly entered.
"Hey, someone asked me to use student council! We are recruiting people who are free!”
Kukuri raises her hand and recruit’s volunteers. Although there is a small natural place, Kukuri, who is a solid, cheerful and kind person, is a member of the student council and everyone can trust her.
In the eyes of the classmates who worked, she walked over to the boy holding a kitten. If you are a leisure person, stay here, everyone's eyes said.
Go to a downtown store to collect fireworks for the event. Even if he rushes from Gakuen Island, it takes over an hour to get to the center of Shizume-cho. Certainly, he was the right one to go as he currently has no job.
Kukuri operates the mission, makes the purchase note, and hands it to the boy.
"Then Shiro, I will send you a note."
The boy thought he would say that and smiled. By the way, what happened to his PDA? He feels like he hasn’t seen it recently.
He looked in his pocket, but couldn't find it. Does he leave it in the bedroom or did he lose it? The boy is not in the habit of playing with his PDA, so he is not in the habit of carrying it.
"Don't you have a PDA?"
Kukuri rolled her eyes. The boy somehow makes a fake smile. Kukuri feels it is a bit strange, but says, "Well, I'll write it down on paper." However, on the way, he realized that...
"Oh, I can't leave school without first looking for it to use."
The pass to enter and exit the Gakuen Island gate is on the PDA designated by the school and that each student has. At school, the PDA serves as an identification card.
However, the boy did not remember wearing it these days. The boy is familiar with the secret passageways at school.
Security seems to be disabled, but the boy knew that even if he didn't have a PDA, he could do anything.
Taking the memo from Kukuri, who had a worried face, the boy laughed and said, "Ok."
The boy has many friends on Gakuen Island, although the relationship is wide and shallow.
There were many "friends" among teachers and staff, as well as among students.
Teachers who are taking lessons directly can be the best people if they really care about a particular student, (Still, old school teachers tend to listen to the boy's requests.) Staff, other than teachers, like security guards thought the boy was like a stray cat.
That is why the boy walked out of the school, not through the gate, but through the guard station. He laughed and said, "I don't use it for long, but I lost my things." The man said, "Please order another one again soon."
Even with good security, there are places where a person tends to be able to pass.
The boy was walking on the bridge connecting Gakuen Island and the mainland, reviewing the shopping notes with the kitten on his shoulder.
All travelers and those on the main island use monorails that pass under the connecting bridge, which is primarily for vehicles and few people walk on foot. However, you need a PDA to travel on the monorail. The connecting bridge is long to walk on foot, but the boy liked to walk on the bridge looking at the sea.
Illuminated by the falling sunlight, the sea is blue and glowing.
The boy leaned on his side and watched the landscape from the bridge. A gentle breeze blows with the scent of the tide, making the boy's hair flutter.
It was a beautiful and calm sight.
Suddenly he feels like staying there forever.
Good weather. Soft breeze. A kitten that clings to his shoulders, and has many bright and fun friends on the way home.
What is here and now seemed calm and terribly difficult to find.
He wondered if something smelled bad about it.
He smiles at his thoughts and is yelled at that he is in the process of being used. He must collect the fireworks she ordered and get a receipt at Shizume-cho, and he must return at six o'clock.
++++++++++
A young man was sitting on top of the building.
He is called "black dog". It is a popular name that sounds like a derogatory name, but he is proud to be the servant of a "King", so he is proud of himself.
Her long black hair in a ponytail flutters in the wind.
Shizume-cho's bustle extends below him.
He saw a boy trying to cross a crowded intersection.
A 16 or 17-year-old boy with a little pink kitten on his shoulder. He's small and has a soft girlish look, with an atmosphere that won't warn anyone.
But…
He saw a guy with a red shirt and a cap who was walking away from the boy with the umbrella a little and made his way through the crowd. The conscience of the guy in the hat is completely directed towards the boy with the umbrella, and his expression is disgusting. Probably a "Homura" member. It's a bad job as a follower, but the umbrella boy doesn't seem to notice.
Looking up at the boys from a height, he took his precious recorder out of his pocket and pressed the play button. The recorder is an important treasure that preserves the voice of his late master and guides his actions.
"The king's shadow lights up."
A deep, slightly bright voice is heard from the recorder. He closed his eyes and listened to the voice.
The boy with the umbrella walks with an unprotected face. Well, he was quiet walking around Shizume-cho city. He doesn't know if the boy has something to think about or if he's dumb.
He put his hand on the sword at his waist. The famous sword "Kotowari" entrusted by his master. He draws that sword only when he fulfills the orders of his master.
"Please look, Ichigen-sama."
He murmured to pray and stood up.
++++++++++
The boy received the fireworks that the student council had ordered at a fireworks store called "Kadamaya" in Shizume-cho. Mainly fireworks, but there are some weird types too, and it was quite interesting that the store owner lectured him on how to use them.
He leaves the store with the receipt received from Kukuri.
There is still time until dusk. Even if he deviated a bit, it looks like he'll be back at six o'clock, and when the boy started walking, something loud was heard slipping on the ground behind him.
When he looked back, he saw a young man on a skateboard hitting a metal bat and approaching.
"Eh?"
The boy opened his eyes and made his thoughts and body stiff for a moment. He visually saw the metal bat swinging toward his head, the stiffness of his body dissolving before he thinks, and he jumps with a reflex.
The downed metal bat destroys the storefront, and the desks and products placed in the store were crushed and scattered.
The boy like a fluffy rice cake on the way was surprised, looking at the young man who swung the metal bat.
A young man who looks like a high school student, wearing a knit hat and a red hoodie around his waist.
He put his foot on the skateboard, put the metal bat on his shoulder, looked back slowly and observed the boy who was confused.
What? What is happening? He wanted to ask, but suddenly the words don't come out of the boy's throat.
The young man on the skateboard manipulates a clock-shaped device on his arm and projects a screen in the air. Carefully compare the boy's face to something projected there and he laughed violently.
"Eh?"
The boy smiled with a cheat, but felt the aggressive will that was near the murder surging from the skateboard guy's body, and he stood up.
Not good. Perhaps this person does not speak. He means, he's so angry he won't have ears.
However, he is not a demon. He doesn't know why, but this young man with a skateboard is angry at "Isana Yashiro".
Why?
The boy tried to engage in boring dialogue while slowly backing away.
"Oh, what is that so sudden? I don't think you have any reason to hit me.”
The skateboarder's brow furrows. That's not good. The boy wanted to cover his face when he responded by pouring oil on the fire. On his shoulders, a kitten clings to the boy with its claws, escaping from the young man on a skateboard.
"Don't you remember being hit? You are brave, shit. So is. I will not stop.”
The body of the young man on the skateboard seemed to sway in red.
The boy scratches his eyes. It is not an error. A bright red light bursts from the young man's body.
When the boy stepped back, the red light appeared, enveloping the young man on the skateboard. Hot. The boy's bangs are slightly burned. The overflowing red light turned into a flame and filled he.
“It's not enough just to catch you. I'll kill you!"
The young man on the skateboard screamed and kicked the ground. He jumps high with his skateboard and shakes the red flame at the boy.
The boy screamed miserably and started running at full speed.
The young man on the skateboard lightly brushes the boy's hair. The sound of the street being destroyed, the explosion and the heat entering from behind, but there is no room to look back.
The boy ran to death.
Run between pedestrians and obstacles, cross the railings and choose a stepped street, he can run on routes that are difficult to ride a skateboard.
He couldn't even pretend and jump onto the street, and he fell onto the back of a truck that stopped at the signal.
With the truck that started to work, he managed to catch his breath.
The kitten looked up at his knees with its front paws. The boy strokes his head.
To be continued soon... Be patient, I will translate the chapter little by little.
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Joker
It’s hard to write a movie review for a movie that everyone already has an opinion about (whether they’ve even seen the film or not). And I know that comes off as very “boo hoo, pity me, the poor movie reviewer who saw this movie for free and now has to WRITE WORDS about it for fun” but listen, there’s some real pressure here. Todd Phillips’ vision of Arthur Fleck (Joaquin Phoenix) and his descent into madness at the hands of a cruel and violent world is nominated for 11 Oscars, including Best Picture, and even though as a society it feels like we’re kind of over the Oscars, they are also somehow still Very Important all at the same time. So is this film a gritty, IMPORTANT, timely warning of the dangers of a man pushed too far? Or is it a sad power trip that encourages an all too common sense of entitlement and violence amongst the men who are presumably most likely to resonate with its message? Well...
Honestly? Fucking neither. It’s shot beautifully (how could it not be when Todd Phillips is just trying to do everything Martin Scorsese would do, but a little less well) and Joaquin Phoenix’s performance is truly, singularly committed and brilliant. But Phoenix is suffering from the same problem as Rami Malek and his incredible performance as Freddie Mercury last year - the movie each man is at the center of (in spite of their incredible acting) is not nearly as clever or interesting as it wants to be or could have been.
Some thoughts:
Arthur is certainly a man in pain in a world that doesn’t really care about him. Gotham is a tense, struggling city, and all the people Arthur encounters treat him with disdain or cruelty. To me, this is less an issue of the moral decay or lawless attitudes of the city, and more about the ways in which poverty poisons people’s lives and souls. This movie depicts class warfare in a way that feels garish and cartoonish, which would be appropriate and possibly kind of cool if it weren’t trying to take everything VeRy SeRiOuSlY.
He’s isolated, depressed, full of rage, and everyone thinks he’s creepy - sure, random coworker, hand him a gun, that checks out.
Also, the movie places us in a weird position almost from the start, because Arthur can’t help that he has brain damage and a disability (his laughter) that makes people uncomfortable. But we’re also supposed to...feel bad for him? understand his frustration? when he gets fired for bringing a gun to a children’s hospital. I don’t think the film necessarily positions us to sympathize with Arthur by the end of the film, but it doesn’t not do that either.
If a man you don’t know walks outside your gate with a clown nose on, you turn and run.
If a man you don’t know puts his thumbs in your mouth, you DEFINITELY turn and run.
One interesting thing that I did ruminate on for quite awhile - Arthur never harms any people of color. Zazie Beetz and Brian Tyree Henry both have interesting supporting roles and are true highlights of the film, and they manage to escape their encounters with Arthur relatively unscathed (albeit disturbed). Let it be said, Arthur only punches up, not down.
A big part of the reason why I say the movie isn’t as clever as it thinks is the lack of engagement with all of the big, nasty themes running through it. A lot of big thematic punchlines are left unexamined, and I’m sorry, just pointing out LOOK AT THIS THING THAT EXISTS is not the same as engaging with it. This is like the Ready Player One approach to social justice issues, or if that phrase is too triggering how about simple fucking human decency, and it rings hollow. For example, two police officers heavily imply that Arthur’s mother (Frances Conroy) is to blame for the violence she and Arthur suffered at the hands of an abusive boyfriend. Is Phillips’ script trying to comment on victim blaming and rape culture here? Based on Arthur’s reaction to the news, I would say no. Or how about the social worker Arthur goes to for counseling saying her department is being shut down due to budget cuts. Is Phillips trying to interrogate the lack of infrastructure in place for mental health support or any other social safety net meant to enhance the public welfare? Well, considering people who have a mental illness are more likely to be the victim of a violent crime than to perpetrate one, I’d say again, no.
When this thing gets bloody, it gets REAL BLOODY. I was prepared, kind of, but it still turned my stomach.
I’m unsure how to feel about Arthur’s appearance on the talk show - the southern belle accent, the dancing, the makeup - it all feels very camp, very queer coded villainy in a way that feels regressive rather than a loving homage to theater and film history.
In fact, describing anything about this movie as loving feels impossible. Even the beautiful cinematography and the effective score - it all feels like it’s born out of spite and ugliness. Like someone dared Todd Phillips to make the most anti of antihero movies, and he wrote the script by fear pissing the words into a snow bank.
Did I Cry? Um yeah, no.
From a structural standpoint, the beats are solid and the tension is tight. It builds and builds until Arthur’s face-off against the late night talk show host (Robert De Niro) who was once his hero until he brutally mocked Arthur on his show. It’s the climax of the film, the pot that boils over, the match lighting the gasoline, and I was so tense I thought I was going to cry and then....I wasn’t. The balloon popped too early for me, the scene verged into something so over-the-top that I completely lost any sense of narrative tension for the rest of the movie.
Which brings us to the ending, that shit-eating-grin-ain’t-i-a-stinker ending. If it undermines everything that came before it, I feel like well what was the point? And if it doesn’t, I feel like well what was the point? You can only play with ambiguity so much before the audience either gets bored or gets mad. Also, I’m gonna have a real hard fucking time if this movie that ends like an episode of Scooby Doo wins a Best Picture Oscar.
The performances are all top notch, but I found this a deeply unpleasant movie watching experience that feels like a very expensive meal at a fancy restaurant. The ingredients are all there, but throwing them all together in very small quantities and dressing them up with pretty garnishes doesn’t necessarily leave anyone feeling satisfied or full of anything but the potential for what could have been.
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#119in2019#joker#joker review#joker 2019#joaquin phoenix#robert de niro#zazie beetz#frances conroy#Brian Tyree Henry#movie reviews#film reviews
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Why Your Books Will Get Banned (Old Nanowrimo Post)
I used to post this game on Nanowrimo. I saved the text before Nanowrimo declared that the N-word spelled out was OK and this wasn’t a democracy (2010, in the archives, at the bottom). I figure it’s OK to post that unless they didn’t change their policy since then, because they want prejudice (though that wasn’t the worst of what they wouldn’t mod). Writing forums need to be run at the top by diverse people, and not just white women. Separate post though. BTW, I have witnesses who still remember this incident, so it isn’t slander. I was working on diversity in the writing forums before WeNeedDiverseBooks was a thing and squandered the opportunity by making it only YA. And I’ll still call them out for that. It got challenged, this thread once, much to the laughter of everyone. (for being anti-Christian lol) If the writer is out there that challenged the thread and somehow got published. Thumbs up, good for you. Maybe you revised since then? The thing I didn’t post with this post every year from 2005-2010 I did this post was I posted it because I wanted people to think hard on Free Speech and what it meant. So I’ll hardball it this time. As you read the list, think hard on who is gate keeping. And who has the right to gate keep. Is gate keeping a tool to oppress and do the power minorities have a right to use the same tool back? How many books don’t even get a chance to be published? I’d also add that chasing after individual authors for the last 10 years has done nothing to change the system. The percentages are the exact same. And how that affects what people in the future will think of us now. Can you write a book that won’t be challenged on these fronts at all? And if you’re going to say, “You’re anti-cancel culture” This was posted before “cancel culture” was a thing. This is more like an examination of the system of censorship itself. (Because look, I like examining systems.) If you want to take this list, BTW, this is years and years of my work reading through ALA who never compiled this list. I’d been following the list since High School when I did a banned book class (which was a fad of the time, I think). So... maybe, give me credit? I feel sad I have to say that. And thanks to Jakob Nielsen and my Typography prof for teaching me the way to format text.
This thread was originally started in honor of ALA Banned Book Week. I've started this several years in a row. Disclaimers for this thread: ('cause I've done this for a few years) 1. We do not support the idea of banning/challenging books.
2. We are doing this for fun and it should not be taken seriously.
3. If you are seriously offended by the fact that we would write these scenes into books please consider the following:
a. It is out of context.
b. You probably unwittingly own a banned book without knowing it. Please check the list: <a href="http://www.ala.org/bbooks/frequentlychallengedbooks">http://www.ala.org/bbooks/frequentlychallengedbooks</a>
c. We are not popular enough to get our books banned, and by hoping in a weird way that they will get banned, you are helping our egos. ^.~
d. If you are religious, the Qu'ran, the (I think Ramayana), the Torah, the Bible all have been challenged or banned. (KJV of the Bible if you plan to be snooty, by even more ironically Jews once, and Atheists the second time). (The Art of War, I also believe was challenged/banned.) (And also, the Bible probably contains more than half of the issues that Christians ban other books for. Christians banned Moll Flanders. All the issues the banned Moll Flanders for is in the Old Testament. Particularly Genesis)
4. This is not a thread for hot debate on the moralities of book banning. It is for listing why you think your book will get banned. If you would like to do so--please start a separate thread. You don't have to stick to Nanowrimo for this thread either.
General Notes: ('cause I like to point out the humor) - This thread was challenged and asked to be banned before. (Because someone was offended by the contents.) The challenge failed, BTW, just in case you'd like to challenge it again. - You probably have to write Young Adult and under to get banned *most* of the time. - Asterisks indicate new ones for the year. (BTW, most of it is about Islam, this year... sex and violence of course)
Want to avoid getting banned/challenged? (Categorized by how the banners see it for maximum head desk based on real book challenges and bannings.)
RELIGION You can't talk about religion. -- No taking the Lord's name in vain. -- You can't have anyone question the will of God or curse them when they lose faith after losing their best friend. (Bridge to Terabithia) -- Anything from Islam --- Cannot include Islam, even as a text book, because it will "indoctrinate the students into the Islamic religion." even if you are only covering it as a chapter. * (World History by Ellis, Elisabeth Gaynor and Anthony Esler.) *
-- Anything (fill in your religion here.) because some people are (fill in your exclusionary term here) -- Atheism (though not a religion, still argued by the theists as one. =P) -- You can't swear, including the word "damn." -- A boy and a girl can't live together if not related, because it's obviously living in sin. -- Can't be detrimental to Christian values.* (The Handmaids Tale, which is BTW, based on a Biblical story...) (The Bible, Torah, Qu'ran and many other religious books have been banned. Yes, if you have a religious book, it has most likely been banned or challenged.)
SOCIAL INEQUALITY You can't talk about class or classism.
You can't talk about race. -- You can't use racial slurs. -- You can't talk about racism. -- You can't have a black bunny marry a white bunny because that's supporting interracial marriage. (The Rabbit's Wedding, though Once Upon a Time in Wonderland also does this explicitly... must have enraged the challenger.) -- The book can't be deemed racist in any fashion. -- You can't talk about Mexican-American issues or history. (Apparently it's a lie that Mexican Americans get racism. *cough*) (Arizona Governor, though it was overturned later). -- You cannot have a Person of Color explicitly on the cover of the book. (Barnes and Nobles pulled that off with Cindy Pon's Silver Pheonix--not to mention all the other publishers.)
No talking about over eating, bad eating habits. No talking about disabilities including cerebral palsy. Can't be sympathetic to Armenians or for portraying Azerbaijans as "savages" [book burner's words] (because apparently you will get a $12,700 price on your head to *cut your ear off* for being historically accurate.) (Stone dreams by Aylisli) *
QUILTBAG Issues: -- You can't talk about sexuality. (As in the willingness to have sex). -- You can't talk about sexual orientation. (As in Straight LGB) -- You can't talk about gender identity issues unless it is cis and not crime investigation kind either. - Main character cannot have two fathers. (The Popularity Papers by Amy Ignatow)
Magic Issues: You can't have talking animals. (Peter Rabbit.) Oh, no magic, no mention of witches, and no fantasy (That promotes Satanism and teaches them to do evil satanic spells). (Harry Potter)
VIOLENCE Children can't do violence, especially to adults or to each other. Especially school violence. You can't have kids doing stunts or possibly hurting themselves. No realistic depictions of the Vietnam War. Can't be Graphic.* (The House of the Spirits) - Cannot have violent illustrations.* (The Librarian of Basra by Jeanette Winter and Nasteen's Secret School by Jeaenette Winter)
No dysfunctional families. -- You can't talk about child abuse.
No characters may ever die. -- No dead parents. -- No dead siblings. -- No dead best friends (Even if you are a Christian author, other Christians will come after you). (Bridge to Terabithia) -- No dying adults. -- You may not mention anyone dead (already) or dying (currently). -- No young infants dying. -- No talk of euthanasia.
You can't have any mention of cannibalism. (Alive, etc)
DRUGS You can't mention any drugs, including alcohol, especially with teenagers drinking it. (The Perks of Being a Wallflower--though there are many others) --- Children can't carry alcoholic beverages.
GENERAL MORAL OBJECTIONS You can't have it be morally corrupt. -- You can't have monsters of any kind. (Where the Wild Things Are) It can't be a "Downer" (Anne Frank) And by all means it can't be "icky." "gross" or "scary" (Goosebumps) Can't be perceived as Anti-feminist.* You can't be a PoC and write something negative about being a PoC.* (The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian) - Cannot have "inappropriate content" (Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman [Welcome to the banned books club, Mr. Gaiman.])* - You cannot have a single mother. (The popularity papers by Amy Ignatow.)* - Cannot be a "Bad book" that "one shouldn't be associated with."* (Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison) - Cannot have "an underlying socialist-communist agenda."*(Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison--note it was challenged in her own home state for this....) - Cannot have a book that goes on about "developmental preparedness" (i.e about children developing?) and "student readiness." (The Story of a Childhood by Marjane Satrapi)*
No children defying authority figures. -- No cursing at parents. -- No disobeying parents. -- You can't have kids breaking dishes (especially to avoid washing them). (A Light in the Attic)
No toilet humor. You can't have characters eating worms, because that's unsanitary. (How to Eat Fried Worms)
SEX Your book can't mention any private parts. You can't mention body parts (this was how it was phrased. --;;) -- Even if you have drawings of lots of people on the beach, not even one of them, even when drawn at 2cm x 2cm can be topless, even as a joke. (Where is Waldo) -- No talk or showing of nudity. (even when private parts aren't shown) -- You cannot teach sexual issues in your book to middle school students. * (The Middle School Survival Guide)
You can't have masturbation or any mention of sex. -- No beastiality -- No showing of safe sex. (Apparently Teen pregnancy is still A-OK, but safe sex isn't! --;;) -- And you can't use any words with "tit" in them. (Title will now be called tidle just not to offend anyone.) (Harry Potter)
Rape may be seen by banners as a type of porn. (I see it as violence, but the banner saw it as titilating sex. --;; *gags*) (Speak)
AUTHOR CAN'T BE... -- LGBT (Asexuality, apparently, is still safe.) -- You can't have the same name as anyone connected to "Socialism" or "Marxism." (Texas School board)
Good luck getting it published.
So yes, this was started as satire. If you have any further questions about said history of said thread, you are welcome to PM me. Do not start it in the thread.
And please reply using the "reply" button at the bottom of the page, not this post.
Banned books for this year PDF: http://www.ila.org/BannedBooks/ALA016%20Short%20List%20L3c_low%20%281%29.pdf
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I just wanted to thank you for that mental health post. I only came back to Tumblr for fandom bullshit but I left in like 2015/2016 because of how toxic it was; one of the biggest things that affected me were how people gate-kept BPD. like, yes it’s an awful disorder than can be diagnosed in VERY traumatic ways, but a person seeing someone else’s struggles, recognizing it in themselves, and wanting to address those problems within themselves doesn’t hurt ANYONE. so thank you for saying it!
Okay I’m honestly kind of touched right now. I’m really happy to hear that it resonated with you. I do go through the tags on my posts sometimes and it always feels good to see people tagging with things like “I really needed this” or “thank you”
I’ve struggled a lot myself with the concept of “having X disorder” - feeling bad for self-advocating and being honest with my psych team that I thought I had a particular diagnosis, feeling guilty for “appropriating” something I didn’t know I had, adding qualifiers to my experiences so people wouldn’t mistake me for “actually having X.” It made me feel guilty a lot of the time when in reality I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I wasn’t proclaiming myself a spokesperson of chronic fatigue syndrome when I had fatigue as a chronic symptom. ADHD resources made me feel seen in a way I hadn’t felt in a while and gave me valuable ideas that I still use, even if I couldn’t technically be diagnosed with ADHD.* The only thing that avoiding research on PTSD (because yeah I had trauma but I didn’t have it that bad) did was delay learning the coping tools - coping tools I could use now that I’ve been officially diagnosed with - you guessed it - PTSD
I’ll likely never have Real Official Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and I’m grateful that my fatigue isn’t severe or painful enough to fit into that category. I do not have ADHD. However, what I do have are a variety of disabling mental illnesses that greatly affect my day-to-day life. I honestly wished I had considered self-diagnosis more seriously. I ignored my anxiety and PTSD (which were, to everyone around me, pretty apparent) for YEARS because I didn’t think it was fair to see someone else’s obvious struggle and apply it to myself because I didn’t “have it bad enough” to really consider it. In both cases it took my friends and mental health professionals pointing it out to me to accept it because I held the view that my issues couldn’t possibly be bad enough to count as a disorder and refused to even look into it
It can be incredibly difficult to accept that you have a disorder. I still struggle with it sometimes. But it really doesn’t have to be all or nothing. It’s okay to pick and choose and say “you know what? I don’t know if I have DID, but I do know I dissociate a lot and it would be helpful to read these DID tips. I don’t have ADHD, but I am incredibly forgetful and I would love tools to manage that. I wouldn’t say I’m ‘depressed,’ but I have trouble motivating myself and getting out of bed in the morning during the winter, so maybe I should look into buying a lightbox.”
I dunno. The original post was just something I spit out on a whim because I was dealing with a lot of “overlapping symptoms” and felt guilty researching ADHD tips when I didn’t have any kind of ADHD diagnosis. But I needed to hear it, and I’m so glad that other people found comfort in it too. Life is weird and so are brains. If you have a tool that helps, a label that explains, or a resource that makes things easier? Take whatever helps you and run with it
*Schizophrenia and ADHD cannot be concurrently diagnosed because the symptom overlap is so heavy. Without the schizophrenia I would likely qualify for an ADHD diagnosis, but since I already definitely have schizophrenia I cannot be diagnosed with ADHD
#mcc /#asks#long post#so to sum it up I wrote another novel no one asked for#but yeah it always makes me a bit emotional to know that someone else resonated with a post I made#I make pretty much every post for myself and what I need to hear#and it makes me so happy to know that it gives comfort to other people as well#so anyway this is 100% a pro self-diagnosis blog#you're welcome here#don't you ever forget that#and just as another quick disclaimer: you're welcome here /even if you're wrong/#even if you DON'T have that it's okay#it's okay to be right and it's okay to be wrong and it's okay to not know#this is coming from an Officially Diagnosed With Everything Adult#it's okay#you're allowed#and my asks are always open if you need to talk
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