#i really try. i make what i can i write when i can i draw what i can why am i trying. why do i try.
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witherby Ā· 2 days ago
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If Punch line can trigger Jason easily what would happen is she ever met Harley?
Let's explore that!
Punchline: First Session
Masterlist is Here!
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"I need your help."
Harley perks up, gasping, and rushes over to hug Batman tightly.
"I never thought this day would come," she says, jumping up and down and clutching a gauntleted hand. "Yes!! Yes I would love to be your therapist! We have so much to work on, starting with your parents. I really think you never internalized the event and haven't given yourself any space to grieve after ā€”"
Her hands get squeezed gently, recapturing her attention. Blue eyes meet white lenses, and she furrows her brow.
"Okay, that's fine!" She sighs. "Can't say I'm not disappointed, but if one of your kiddos is looking for help instead, I'm still more than hapā€”"
"Not one of mine," Batman gently interrupts. "This is a...very delicate case, Harley."
"What's delicate mean in this context, Batsy?" She asks. "Delicate like schizophrenic? Delicate like CPTSD? Delicate like one wrong word away from explodin' and killin' everybody in a mile radius?"
"Delicate," he says, "like...this might hit too close to home for you."
"Me?"
Batman nods. Harley hums, equal parts curious and cautious.
"Any good psychologist worth her salt won't let a personal connection get in the way of providin' aid," she tells him. "If the patient isn't somebody I can help myself, I'll help ya find someone who can. When can I meet 'em?"
--
Your file lies scattered across the floor of the cave. Harley stares wide-eyed at your picture while she trembles on her hands and knees. Bruce, having changed out of his suit, kneels beside her with a steadying hand on her back.
"Oh," she whispers, "Brucie, she's so small for her age. And her age!! Sh-she's..."
Harley shakes her head. Bruce continues rubbing small circles in her back. When she leans against him for support, he holds her upright.
"How'd he keep a kid hidden for eight years?" She whispers, voice thick. "I know I fucked off to go play Happy Family with Ivy, but..."
"Nobody knew," he says. "Harleen, don't play the blame game, not for this. He kept her a secret for a reason; no one was supposed to know."
Harley lifts her hands to her face, rubbing her eyes before any tears can well up and fall. She takes deep, calming breaths, gathering her focus, then carefully collects the papers and stands with his help. She draws a pad and pen out of her pocket.
"I ain't promising anything," she says, looking up at Bruce. "This is...this is a whole different ball game, 'specially with that chucklefuck as the daddy. But I'm gonna try, okay?"
He nods. "Take your time. You were the first person I thought of, but don't force this if it's too much."
Harley gently squeezes his hand in acknowledgement. She walks past him and down the hall towards the containment cells, heels clicking quietly against the floor. She dug out her old coat with the name tag pinned to it and even threw her hair back in a low braid to appear as non-threatening as possible. The closer she gets to your door, the more the wonders if you would've been more comfortable if she showed up in her combat getup and mallet.
"Miss Punchline?" She calls, stopping in front of your cell. A cursory glance of your environment tells her immediately that you're under-stimulated. She writes that down. "I'm Doctor Quinzel. Do ya mind if I come in and chat with you a while?"
You cease all movement. You'd been sitting with your back to the door, gently stroking the head of the teddy bear Alfred gave you while muttering Mistress Mary's nursery rhyme, but when you hear her, you practically turn into a statue. Unless she actively stares at your back, Harley can't even see you draw breath.
"Miss Punchline?" She repeats calmly. "I won't come in if you don't want, but I'd really like to talk to you."
"...Popsy talks about you, sometimes," you say. Harley can't decipher your tone, but the words make her feel cold all over. "Says he used to miss his favorite gal."
"I'm sure he's mentioned me once or twice," she says, clearing her throat. "But I'm old news. Why don't you tell me about yourself? I'm gonna punch in the door code now, okay?"
You don't move. Harley unlocks your cell and walks inside, getting a better look at how sparsely decorated it is. The bed is clearly unused and half of the activities left here would cause an ordinary child to lose interest in about an hour without company. Overall, Bruce and his family are keeping you in a dreary room. If she accomplishes nothing else today, it's a guarantee that she's gonna get you better accommodations.
Harley walks around the room until she can see you face-to-face. Once she's in your periphery, your eyes snap to her and follow her every movement like a predator. She lowers herself to the ground, taking a seat a few feet away from you.
"There you are," she says kindly. Your smile is just as placid as the one in your photo. "I like ya make-up. The swirly pattern on your cheeks is very cute."
You don't respond, though your smile widens briefly. Highly receptive to praise. Your eyes don't leave hers, scanning, assessing, calculating. Harley doesn't feel like you're about to attack her, but you're clearly juggling something around in your mind.
"Bet you're thinking about mine," she continues. "Normally I like puttin' on the face paint, but sometimes my pores gotta breathe, you know? Well ā€” the pores I got left." She glances down at her hands, paper white like the rest of her body from her dip in a vat of acid. With relief, Harley notes that your unpainted skin is a healthy color. Even though the bar's lower than Hell, it's nice to know that at least the Joker didn't immediately treat you to a dunk of your own.
"Punchline, I'm gonna be frank with you," she says.
"Nice to meetcha, Frank," you chirp, grinning mischievously. Harley lifts a brow.
"That was funny," she praises. "I know your, eh, Popsy, he places a lot of value on bein' funny. Used to say nothin' was worth the effort if it didn't amuse him at the end of the day. I'm sure you know that already."
"A giggle a day keeps the boredom away!" You say, pitch and cadence matching that of your father's. Harley knows that the grip on her pen is too tight. She breathes deep and forces herself to relax. "Ohh, hit a nerve, Frank?"
"I'm doin' just fine," she says. "What's boredom look like for you and Popsy?"
You separate your hands, fingers splayed wide, and make explosion noises.
"Do you get caught up in that explosion?"
Your smile doesn't change but your eyes get sharp. Harley makes a note.
"It's hard keepin' him entertained all day, every day," she says. "I would know. But I'm gonna tell ya somethin' your popsy probably never has."
Harley scoots a tad closer to you, reaching her hand out and gently taking one of yours. She can feel every bone in your hand and has to utilize all of her training to school her expression.
"It's not your job to make yer popsy happy. In fact, it's not your job to make any adult happy. Grown-ups shouldn't rely on their children for emotional regulation."
"Couldn't rely on you, either, could be?" You snicker. "Since you ran away."
"I left him because he was treatin' me like dirt," Harley says, a little more firm than necessary. "He's real good at drawin' you in, Punchline. Shows you an ounce of praise that makes you feel invincible, makes you wanna do anything he asks to get more of it."
Harley lets go of your hand to tuck a lock of emerald green hair behind your right ear, brushing gently against the shell. The edges are distorted, flatter than your left.
"He's also real good at draggin' you through the mud, makin' you feel like everything's your fault. Like you got no choice but to make it up t'him. Ya never wanna get on his bad side cause he really makes you feel it."
You tilt your head away from her hand, eyes dropping back down to the teddy bear Alfred gave you. You resume petting it, slightly faster and rougher than before. Harley makes a note.
"His anger's always more powerful than his joy, Punchline," she says, "but both of them are destructive. I wanna help ya break away from his cycle."
"No thanks," you say, "if I wanted to be a washed-up, third-rate party clown, I would!"
Harley feels a wave of pity for you. It's obvious you're just regurgitating your father's words back at her, and she's not surprised. Change doesn't happen overnight, especially not for you.
There's so much work to do, but Harley's not afraid. You may look and behave similarly to the Joker, but you're young and still impressionable and already starting to pull away from him without even realizing it.
"I can tell yer getting upset, and that's the last thing I want," she says, climbing to her feet, "so I think this is a good stopping point for today. But I'd really like to see you again. Would you be alright with that?"
You blow a raspberry at her, then cackle. Harley exhales sharply through her nose, giving you a fond smile, and pats your head as she steps past you and opens the cell door.
She can do this. She will do this. For you.
But, first thing's first.
"Brucie, you're kidding me with the furnishings! How's the richest man on the planet gonna put a kid in such a shitty room!? Don't look at me like that, mister. You brought me in t'do a job and I'm gonna do it right!!"
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ceslatoil Ā· 3 days ago
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Ghost Filbrick AU
So a few weeks ago I was in the group chat and I pitched an idea for a fic (not writing it anytime soon, I have enough projects on my plate for now!) and itā€™s about the Pines family visiting Ma Pines before she moves to an assisted care facility. Main idea is that Dipper and Mabel meet Filbrickā€™s ghost who is trying to hinder the move, and the family trying to get him to move on. Lots of family drama ensues.
I wrote like, a scrap of a script draft for it if yā€™all wanna read it below:
(Scene: The grown ups, including CARYN, STAN, FORD and COOPER, MABEL & DIPPERā€™s dad, are all up playing cards. CARYN pulls out the Tarot Deck)
Caryn: I call this one ā€œLast Man Standing!ā€ You put down a card and the other player has to put down either the same suit or card number. If someone plays a major arcana card like wheel of fortune or the star, they can switch up the minor arcana suit. If you play death or the tower, the other players draw four. Whoever has zero cards wins!
Dad Pines: Grandma I think you just reverse engineered Uno
Stan: Dad wouldnā€™t buy us more than one card deck, so we made due with Maā€™s tarot.
Ford: I thought it was to keep you from cheating the deck
Caryn: Both things could be true! Now hush.
Stan: ā€¦ Coop is everything all right with Dipper? Itā€™s not my business butā€¦ he seemed pretty cagey with ya earlier.
Caryn: Cagey? The kid stormed out of the room in the middle of dinner! Granted it was *my* cooking, so I canā€™t really hold a grudge on that front. (*plays a card*) Thatā€™s The Fool, so weā€™re reversing direction.
Ford: ā€¦ It just doesnā€™t seem like him.
Coop: ā€¦ thatā€™s been the norm lately, Iā€™m afraid. I donā€™t think heā€™s handling the divorce well, with me moving out and I just havenā€™t been around as much since then.
Ford: Mabel told us in one of her letters you were in family therapy together?
Coop: Weā€™ve had a few sessions, yes. She loved it, got along great with our counselor. I think she asked a few times about becoming a therapist someday! But Dipper doesnā€™t really participate much during the sessions. He just sulks in the corner, like he doesnā€™t want to be there at all.
Stan: Heā€™ll get over it. Heā€™s stubborn, but not the type to hold a grudge.
Ford: I canā€™t imagine any of this is easy for any of you.
Coop: Weirdly enough, me and Annieā€” uh, Annie and *I*ā€” have gotten on better than ever. Divorce was the best thing to happen to our relationship, itā€™s like weā€™re finally friends again?
Stan: Divorce ainā€™t so bad, Iā€™ve done it at least six times now!
Caryn: I thought about divorcing your father, but he died before I got around to it. Suit change.
Ford: when did Dad pass?
Stan: ā€¦ ā€˜97.
Ford: ā€¦ I see. (*silence*)
Caryn: ā€¦ Letā€™s not talk about funerals right now. God knows Iā€™ve been to enough of ā€˜em. Iā€™m just glad one of ā€˜em didnā€™t count. (*pinches Stanā€™s cheek.*)
Stan: ā€¦ me too, Ma.
Ford: ā€¦ Last Man Standing
Stan: Like hell you are, you shit, draw four!
Ford: ā€¦ thatā€™s not the tower, thatā€™s a Stan Buck!
Caryn: Donā€™t tell me youā€™re still making Stan Bucks! You know damn well thatā€™s not how money works!
(This next part is self indulgent and idk if Iā€™ll include it in the fic proper)
Caryn: Now Stanfordā€¦ let me ask you a question. Why the hell have you been hiding your left hand in your pocket all night?
Ford:ā€¦. I donā€™t know what you meanā€” HEY!
(Caryn pulls his hand out of his pocket, examines his second ring finger)
Caryn: Stanford Filbrick why does it look like you have a wedding band on your finger?
Ford: ā€¦. (*sighs*) because I have a wedding band on my finger.
Caryn: AHA! Here we are moping about death and divorce and you sit on good news like that! Who is she? Whoā€™s your wife? Whereā€™d you meet her, whatā€™s her family like, what does she do?
Ford:ā€¦ I donā€™t have a wife. I have a husband.
Stan: The guy used to live in the dump and now heā€™s a millionaire inventor running for president.
Caryn: You married McGucket?! Me and the girls canvassed for him this year! Wait till I tell that Janine, thatā€™ll get her to pipe down about her Chiropractor Son-In-Law for once!
Coop: I really like his policies on infrastructure, very forward thinking!
Stan: Eh, Iā€™m voting third party. Nothing personal, I just donā€™t want a brother in law whoā€™s commander in chief. It would make thanksgiving a nightmare.
Ford: Youā€™re a felon, you canā€™t vote at all.
Stan: That hasnā€™t stopped me in thirty years!
Ford: So Ma, youā€™reā€¦ fine withā€”
Caryn: Sweetie, until this morning I thought two of my sons were dead and one cut all ties. I figured I deserved it. Sitting back while your Father gave you all grief for nothin. I told myself if I ever saw you again Iā€™d take you as is, and I meant it.
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bananaactivity Ā· 3 days ago
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Personally, as someone who loves character design ( Like regular human character design is my forte but I can bust a monster or furry design out if I lock in) all the same hair is annoying when I'm trying to distinguish them likeā€¦ you can distinguish Adam, Chase, Oliver, and Kaz in live-action cause they all have different heights, and ages and wear semi-different clothes. But when you draw them you realizeā€¦ they all have the same flipping hairstyle at their most interesting points. And sometimes they wear the same kinda clothes and next thing you know it all feels so repetitive to draw.
Like wtf
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Are we being dead ass rn wtf is this. ( ADAM THAT WIDOWS PEAK IS NOT SAVING YOUUU)
That coupled with the fact that they all wear extremely similar clothes and it's like in an unrealistic cartoon design class ts would be fucked. All of them have worn plaid shirts so it's not a Chase or Oli thing, all of them have worn Raglan tees so it's not a Kaz or Adam thing. Like their personalities are doing all the work and those are similar too. Funny stupid man and Smart bitchless man.
There are minute differences that a locked in fan could point out, but on a surface level, they're much too close. This is especially true for art and fanfics which already kinda fuck up the character's actual personalities for headcanons or misinterpretations or whatever but it's a stupid silly decade-old show, who gives a shit what the fans create. They literally destroyed three good shows over one measly boost in views. Now look at them the whole channel is basically gone nowadays.
I haven't done the same amount of work as I have for Kickin' It, but I'm working on it. The hair has already been fixed. I think.
Oli gets curls and a mullet, Kaz keeps his hair but make it more pointy, Adam gets a more swoopy slick thing and Chase gets a more exaggerated and messy pointy thing.
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I donā€™t really have the same issues with Kai and Jack or Rudy and Ty from Kickin it cause my AU has them being mirrors of each other. Like Ty and Rudy are mirrors for each other and then as a whole theyā€™re mirrors for the younger duo. itā€™s kinda the same thing as Adam/Chase and Douglas/ Donald, that whole breaking the cycle thing.
It works in my AU cause I canā€™t stand to write sad shit. Iā€™m more of a goofy goober. Anyway enough yapping from me that was just my two cents
idk if this is an unpopular opinion but i miss their silly 2010ā€™s swoopy hair :(
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dervampireprince Ā· 3 days ago
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there was a little interest in me sharing my writing drabbles and ideas about lucien (my visiting king oc) and lysander (my villain oc) as a couple so here's all the things i shared in my discord last week (how was it only last week, it feels like forever ago).
[18+ only, minors dni]
note: lucien and lysander are both trans men with bottom and top surgery
i tried to format this in a way that's readable. it's a mix of different little scenarios including my entire summary of their plot of how they'd meet and get together. i had no idea how to format thisss.
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the message that started it all: peaking in from my uhh 3 hours of drawing as i attempt to make a design for the villain and keep hating what im drawing and scrapping the design and starting again to say hey. you know who'd treat him right? the visiting king
i thought about it as a joke but um. i dont think its a joke anymore.
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What if I shipped them:
Villain submitting looks like him crying, head throne back, sobbing, the king gently and slowly breaking him down, praising him, cradling him
King submitting looks like him on his knees, begging as the villainā€™s boot presses down onto his cock, begging to be touched however the villain sees fit, villain telling him how useful he is beingĀ 
Luce: I missed you. Ly: I was only gone for a week. Luce: Even an hour without your presence feels like a lifetime [kisses his hand]. Ly: [internally: what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck] [blushing profusely]
Lysander crying the first time Lucien fucks him because heā€™s being so gentle, works him open so slowly, tells him how beautiful he is, ā€œOh Zander,ā€ Lucien coos when heā€™s finally seated inside him, Lysander embarrassed at how emotional he is, but Lucien pulls his hands from his face, kisses his them, tells him heā€™s perfect.
Lysander leaving Lucien with a cock ring on while heā€™s away.
Lucien is on his knees, ring around his straining cock. His moans are muffled, his hair tugged back and forth, as Lysander fucks his face. When Lysander pulls his cock out, Lucien begs. ā€œPlease Zander, please let me fuck you.ā€ ā€œHmm,ā€ Lysander pretends to think about it while Lucien keeps babbling, pleading over and over. ā€œAnd what if I want to fuck you?ā€ ā€œAnything,ā€ Lucien doesnā€™t even blink. ā€œAs long as my skin gets to touch yours, please, give me anything.ā€ And what really can Lysander do with that other than have Lucien bent over the bed, fucking into him over and over, every time he gets closeā€¦ he stops. He edges himself inside Lucienā€™s hole, all the while Lucien is unable to come from the ring around his cock. Once Lucien is relaxed and out of his mind enough to stop begging, to just take whatever Lysander gives him, to stop thinking, thatā€™s when Lysander will let him come.
okay so how i see it happening.
lucien somehow finds out about what's going on in lysander's city and wants to help. they start meeting each other. lysander does not trust him, doesn't want to trust him, because he's never been able to put any trust or faith in a nobility or royalty or higher ups. but lucien just seems so... nice. good. and that can't be right, no one can be that nice without something to gain, without some agenda.
but time passes. lucien is really just that nice. and he sees good in lysander. and lysander knows what he's doing isn't wrong, he believes what he's doing is right, but he also doesn't really believe he's a good person. and lucien tells him he is. and that annoys him because it makes him *feel*.
and lucien ends up helping too much. or doing something to help lysander's people that makes lysander feel inept. who does lucien think he is, swooping in with his riches and power. doing things for them lysander couldn't because he didn't have the money. and maybe lysander takes it as lucien trying to make him feel small and poor, but that isn't how lucien meant it. and lysander knows that deep down. but it's easier to get angry at lucien than accept that it's okay if he wants or needs this man's help. so he gets angry at lucien.
and lysander know's he's wrong for blowing up at him. for pushing him away. and after an amount of time of feeling sorry for himself, he goes to see lucien. shows up on his doorstep and apologies. and lucien just accepts it. this stupid fucking kind man just accepts it, says he understands, *he* apologies for overstepping, that he should have consulted lysander, doesn't want to cross any boundaries, tells lysander he's doing a good job and that wall inside lysander just comes crumbling down.
lysander stays the night, in his own room lucien has set aside. and in the morning lucien invites him for breakfast. and then on a walk, touring his gardens. and lysander asks what the fuck all of this is. and lucien says he just wants to help, but admits to having one ulteriorĀ  motive. and lysander thinks finally he's got him but the lucien says "i wanted an excuse to keep seeing you".
lysander calls him a stupid man. blusters and tries to act like he doesn't understand what lucien is getting at, but he does. and lucien just stands there patiently, until lysander has finished ranting, and then asks lysander if he can court him. if he can kiss him.
and lysander says yes.
Lysander telling Lucien to stop fucking him like heā€™s gonna break. Lucien says heā€™s not into causing pain. But Lysanderā€™s not asking for pain, heā€™s just asking if Lucien ever wants to just pound into him. It takes some convincing that heā€™s allowed too (Lucien is worried heā€™s too big and could too easily hurt someone) but Lysander assures him that he wants to be fucked hard.
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yukidragon Ā· 2 days ago
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Hello, I started reading your blog not so long ago. I am amazed at how you describe everything in detail, so professionally that your headcannons seem to be canons))
Anyway, I have a question about the game Something's Wrong With Sunny Day Jack. How do you think the characters from this game would help and support us if we (the players, the main characters) were very shy? In terms of any actions, such as expressing your feelings to your partner or intimacy. And not in the sense that we are just embarrassed, but really very timid and do not know how to behave (For example, because of personal feelings or doubts, poor self-esteem and self-doubt, we behave this way). How would the characters in this game support us, help us feel more comfortable and confident?
Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoy my rambles and ideas. šŸ’–
Well a fair number of them are canon to Sunshine in Hell if you want to get technical. Not so much the AUs and random what if scenarios of course. ;3 I just approach the characters and setting through my own lens and what feels right to me, which I apply to the stories I write about them.
Funny enough, having a timid and shy main character suffering from poor self-esteem and lots of self-doubts is at the core of Sunshine in Hell. Alice is a character who is suffering from a lot of hesitance and uncertainty due to past experiences and a lot of toxic aspects of society.
Jack
Jack is incredibly mindful of Alice's needs and boundaries. Thanks to their connection, he can sense when he's doing something to make her uncomfortable and adjust accordingly. This bond their souls have may or may not be canon to the game, but it is canon to my version of the story. In a way it's kind of a cheat for Jack, allowing him insight that other people lack.
Plus Jack is a perceptive, clever man. It was a survival tactic when he was on the street to be able to read others' intentions, and he grew up in a house full of two-faced people as Joseph. He learned what he had to do in order to please people. He knows how to read body language, expressions, tone, etc. so he can tell when someone is feeling positively or negatively. Even if his supernatural "cheat" doesn't give him enough of a hint, he can deduce more from body language.
Jack wants to be there for his sunshine and be everything they could ever want or need. He needs them. He's desperate for their love and to have a purpose, and his very existence is tied to it. This makes him especially mindful of his sunshine's likes, dislikes, and needs.
So depending on the MC, Jack will try to adjust his behavior around them. If they need him to go slower and be more supportive he will. That's why Sunshine in Hell is going to be a slow burn. Alice was not only damaged by societal pressures, but by a toxic relationship with her previous and only partner. Being burned so many times has left her hesitant to make a move that might cause her to feel the flames again.
Jack's go-to to offer support and help his sunshine feel more comfortable is with words. He is the ultimate cheerleader, offering advice when he can, watching out for their health, and of course giving unending praise. He makes sure to tell his sunshine exactly what makes them so beautiful in his eyes and how brightly they shine.
Jack pays attention to even the small details about his sunshine, what they like, what draws their attention, and what they have been able to accomplish. He then shines a spotlight on those parts of MC with plenty of encouraging words and love.
In ways Jack also takes on the guiding, mentor role, especially for a timid MC. After being scarred by Ian and so down on themselves, he needs to work hard to coax open their heart again and let them know that it's okay to love him and to accept his love and support.
A good example is Jack gently guiding his sunshine to his lips when they have the urge to kiss him, then further coaxing that kiss into a deeper one with tongue. He pushes his luck at times, as he's just so NEEDY for his sunshine, but he's hyper focused on their comfort. He won't and can't do anything his sunshine doesn't want to do after all.
Jack certainly is going to encourage any steps his sunshine takes towards him. Using Alice as an example, whenever she reaches out to touch him first, he tries not to call attention to it, since that could make her feel self-conscious and retreat. Instead he offers gentle smiles, returns the touch if he can, and is as encouraging as he can be. He wants to reward every time she gathers up the courage to do more with him.
He's careful not to chase after her when she needs to retreat. While disappointed, Jack knows that Alice needs that space for herself because she's overwhelmed. He instead focuses on redirecting her attention to something less troubling if he can.
Distraction from anxious thoughts are another tactic Jack employs. Redirecting his sunshine's focus to what they do right and how much he loves them can prevent an anxiety spiral that might lead to them retreating from him and his love.
Of course, if their worries and self-doubt start to spiral into a dark direction, Jack will help walk them through it. He wants to share their burdens and be a good friend and partner to them. He wants to be just as vital to their life as they are to his.
Jack's past psychology classes as Joseph help in this regard. He learned techniques about how to calm down a child who is scared or dealing with trauma. It doesn't translate perfectly when dealing with adults, especially since he's constantly trying to be Sunny Day Jack 24/7, but it works with those who aren't turned off by this kids show host persona.
While Jack isn't perfect at it - though he desperately wants to be - letting his own needs and desires for MC bleed through at times, he tries his very best to support them in whatever way they need. He checks in on how they're feeling, even during the most intimate of settings, especially when they're feeling uneasy or uncertain. For Alice, he's just what she needs during her most vulnerable time.
On that note, let's switch to the guy that left Alice feeling so vulnerable in the first place. The question was how all the love interests will support MC after all.
Ian
Ian is... a mess, to put it simply. He tries his level best, but he gets swept up in his own feelings at times, as I've mentioned in previous headcanons, like the big one about sex and love.
Ian knows what it's like to lack confidence and to view himself in a negative light. He's down on himself and very timid. He struggles with expressing himself due to being suppressed for years. He does best when being guided rather than doing the guiding.
With some partners, this could lead to overcompensation. Alice went out of her way to ignore her own needs in order to make him happy and encourage him. This feeling that she had to take care of him pushed her to do things before she felt comfortable or ready.
However, if Alice did voice she wasn't ready for something, Ian would've backed off immediately. He doesn't want to push his partner hard and would feel awful if he did so, likely leading to him crying. He just wants to be a good partner and fears he's not good enough for her... or anyone.
In a way, Ian then becomes the perfect person to relate to an MC who lacks confidence. He understands these insecurities all too well and can share in that experience. He knows just how hard it is to overcome that awful voice in one's head that says you're not good enough. He related to Alice and her worries about her appearance. He always made sure to let her know that he loves her regardless of what society finds weird or ugly, such as her weight or how she might act at times.
Ian reassured Alice that he only ever found her attractive. He struggles to put things into words at times though, especially due to his shyness. Other people are "weird" in his eyes, so he could never want to be with them like he wants to be with her.
Ian is someone very excited for physical intimacy, and once he is given the green light, he tends to take the lead in his enthusiasm. This can allow MC to not worry about making decisions when he lets his urges and emotions lead the way. He also doesn't shy away from telling MC just how much he loves them and how good they make him feel.
Even if MC doesn't feel confident in their appearance, Ian knows them. They grew up together. They've been his strength when he was weak. They might think badly of themselves, but he sees them as his hero. They've done so much for him, been there with him through his worst moments, and gave him the strength to pursue his dreams. They shine so brightly in his eyes. He's not afraid to let them know that they are the best thing to ever happen to him.
Which makes it all the worse that he cheated, but shhh, that's not what this post is about.
Shaun
Speaking of which, that gives a good segue to switch over to Shaun. After Ian cheated, I can imagine MC's self-image and confidence would be at its lowest. Fortunately, Shaun was there to offer support and words of encouragement. He makes it clear that he cares and he's there for them, always.
Shaun knows that MC deserves so much better than to feel like garbage. He's a big ball of sunshine, and he takes the lead with a friend or partner who is struggling to keep up. He is very encouraging with physical touch, such as hugs, cuddles, and ear scritches. His purring can serve as a very nice reward for MC when they have the courage to get a bit more physical with him.
Shaun tries to keep things light most of the time, mainly because he's wallpapering over his own issues. He's bold and energetic, and that can help distract MC from their own worries and hesitation.
Of course, Shaun isn't one to avoid a difficult conversation just because it's hard. He wants to talk through what's bothering with MC and help them work through their issues. If they don't want to discuss it though, he'll let the topic drop for something that they're more comfortable with.
If MC is open for it, Shaun is ready to give bear hugs whenever they want. He's got the strength to scoop up even the heaviest of besties. If they don't want it though, he'll show his support by buying them lunch or talking about something fun.
Another perk Shaun has is kitty therapy. Not only is he cat-coded, with his whisker marks, kitty eyes, and ability to purr, but he has sweet baby Moon Pie. What better way to soothe a nervous MC than with a kitty cuddle puddle with a precious furbaby in their lap while he cuddles them both close?
When it comes to intimacy, Shaun leans towards being a daddy dom. He's good about checking in though, making sure that MC is feeling comfortable. This goes for platonic moments too. It might be easy to get swept up in his flow, but he's very mindful of those he cares about. He's the type to take charge of things so that everyone gets fair treatment and feels comfortable.
When it comes to insecurities and MC being down on themselves, it'd come to a surprise to Shaun that they feel that way. He doesn't see these supposed flaws they have. Oh, he believes they see these flaws in themselves, but he certainly doesn't, and he's sure no one else who matters does either.
If MC wants or needs Shaun to take the lead, he's more than happy to do so. He can be his kitten's daddy dom if they want him to be~ If they need to take it slower and make the first move, he'll let them. Shaun is so worried about how MC feels that he's swallowed his crush on them for years. He doesn't want to lose his friendship with them just because of his feelings.
Shaun does have plenty of confidence in himself, but he's mindful that's not a guarantee of anything. It's also not an excuse to cross boundaries. Emotions are more complicated than that, and success plus a good appearance doesn't make someone necessarily appealing to everyone in all ways. His uncle is someone successful, well respected, and charismatic, but is very abrasive, as an example. He loves the man, but also can't trust him.
Shaun knows what it's like to be hesitant to trust someone. That's why he works hard to be someone that can be trusted. He wants to be liked and to help people to feel relaxed around him. It's what makes him a good friend and an attentive lover. He'll do his best to encourage a timid MC to do what they want, even if he might long for something more. He can keep his feelings in check to make sure that they're both comfortable.
Nick
On that sweet note, let's switch over to Nick. Granted, I haven't gone into Nick's backstory a lot as of yet due to his role in things, and my thoughts on him have evolved a lot over time, but he's a sweetheart overall in my headcanon land. While he has this influencer persona online, and a sexy, confident dom on LonelyFans, he is actually a bit timid when taking off those masks. He knows what it's like to feel easily flustered, so he does his best to disarm those feelings, letting MC know it's okay.
Nick does his best not to put pressure on MC. While he does ask MC out while at work, it was at a moment that felt right after some good chemistry between them. He backs off right away at being turned down and respects boundaries.
Nick was drawn to MC by how cute they are. He wants to learn more about them as himself, not as his online persona. He understands the pressure to perform, to push himself further to live up to expectations. He wants to remove that pressure from others in his life, especially his partner.
However, Nick's experiences with LonelyFans, especially personal shows with his followers, has given him experience on how to dish out praise. He's learned how to make various people feel good and cater to different tastes. He's dealt with shy customers before, and he knows how to take charge when they need him to be the strong dom, and when to be that sweet and seductive voice in their ear letting them know that they're doing a good job.
Nick tries to balance what he learned from his online persona with his real, kind of awkward self. When he's in a relationship offline, he tries his best to be his authentic self and not so much the dom persona. He'll do his best to encourage MC to be themselves too. He wants that authentic connection with someone. This means accepting that their authentic self can be a bit clumsy and uncomfortable with themselves.
While Shaun is more bombastic and energetic, Nick is more chill. He goes with the flow more, allowing things to slow down to a less stressful pace. After all, the online space is constant go, go, go, and he enjoys the space to breathe and just experience a genuine moment when offline. He helps MC feel more confident by helping them find space to breathe and slow down too. They don't have to rush when they're with him.
If they need Nick in dom mode he can do that, but he'd rather save that for when he's in the headspace to switch to that persona. He might teasingly switch to it during casual moments though, especially if MC let him know they need an extra nudge at times to get going.
Overall, all the guys are mindful of MC's boundaries. If they say they don't want to do something, they won't push it. They also check to make sure they're doing okay. They're encouraging and genuinely think MC is amazing. For all the love interests' individual flaws, they do try to do their best for the people they care about. They might fumble at times and make mistakes, but they do want MC to feel happy and confident in themselves.
@channydrawsĀ @earthgirlaestheticĀ @sai-of-the-7-starsĀ @cheriihoneyĀ @illary-koreĀ @okamiliqueurĀ @kurokrisps
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itsnesss Ā· 2 days ago
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š°š”ššš­ š°ššš¬ š„šžšŸš­ | axel kovacevik Ɨ fem!reader
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summary | during the sekai taikai, you share a tense yet electrifying moment with axel. however, after the tournament, axel returns a month later with a colder, more ruthless demeanor. under his senseiā€™s influence, he embraces a darker path, pushing you away with harsh words.
warnings | angst, emotional turmoil, rivalry, implied violence, manipulation, character change, unresolved tension, and brief romantic moment
word count | 1.6 k
author's note | I'm obsessed!
it would help me a lot if you liked, commented and reposted so that more people read what I write and don't forget to follow me thanks į”£š­©
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The noise of the tournament echoes in the air, the sounds of blows and shouts filling the space as fighters from all over the world clash in the arena. The Sekai Taikai is at its peak, and although it has yet to reach its conclusion, you already feel the weight of everything it has meant. The hours of training, the expectations of your dojo, the pressure. Everything seems to be reaching a climax, as if everything you've done so far has led you to this moment.
But something else is happening, something that has nothing to do with the competition. Axel Kovacevic, the boy from Iron Dragons, lingers in your thoughts more than you'd like to admit. Every time your eyes meet his, something inside you ignitesā€”an uncomfortable yet electrifying sensation. Itā€™s not just the fact that he's fighting around you; itā€™s the way he watches you, the way he challenges you, the way he makes you question everything you thought you knew.
After your match, you head toward the nearby beach, seeking a moment of respite amid the chaos. The sky is clear, the sun beginning to set, painting everything in shades of orange and gold. Itā€™s the kind of moment that invites reflection, a chance to disconnect. And when you arrive, you realize youā€™re not alone.
Axel is there, staring at the horizon, his hands tucked into the pockets of his jacket, as if trying to distance himself from the world for a moment. Something about his posture draws you in, as if he, too, is searching for something. At that moment, you realize that despite the crowd surrounding you both, an invisible gap exists between youā€”something that compels you to step closer.
Without a word, you walk toward him. The sound of your footsteps against the sand seems amplified in the quiet. He notices you before you can speak and turns slightly to look at you. Thereā€™s no surprise on his face, just a slight curve of his lips, as if he was expecting you.
ā€œWhat are you doing here?ā€ he asks, his voice low yet clear, carrying a calmness that feels out of place in the midst of the tournament.
ā€œI needed a break,ā€ you reply, not looking away from his eyes. You sense thereā€™s more behind his question, something you donā€™t entirely understand, but youā€™re unsure what to say. You donā€™t know if you should talk about what happened in the arena, about the match that left your heart racing, about the way his gaze follows you as if he's waiting for something from you.
Axel takes a step closer, his presence near you electrifying, almost unsettling. Itā€™s as if everything around you has faded, leaving only the two of you suspended in this moment.
ā€œYou havenā€™t really answered my question,ā€ he says, moving even closer, and something in his tone makes you feel like heā€™s challenging you, like heā€™s waiting for you to finally say something that matters.
The breeze caresses your skin, and you wonder if this is the right momentā€”if the words youā€™ve been holding back should finally be spoken.
ā€œMaybe Iā€™m here because I canā€™t stop thinking about you,ā€ you say, the words slipping out before you can stop them. ā€œAbout everything that happened in the tournamentā€¦ about what you made me feel.ā€
Axel watches you in silence for a long moment, as if weighing your words. Then, with unexpected swiftness, he takes your hand. The touch is firm but gentle, and youā€™re surprised by how easily you let yourself follow. He leads you to a quiet corner of the beach, away from the crowd and the tournamentā€™s noise, where the waves continue their eternal rhythm.
And then, as sudden as it is intense, his lips find yours. The kiss is like an explosionā€”brief but fierce. Itā€™s not a soft kiss; itā€™s unexpected, as if he couldnā€™t wait any longer, as if everything that has happened until now has led to this very moment. For a second, you freeze, unsure whether to push him away or stay and let yourself feel whatā€™s happening.
But something in the way he presses against you, in the urgency of his touch, makes you respond. You let yourself be carried away by the sensation of his lips on yours, by the way his body moves closer, almost as if he wants to erase the distance between you. The kiss lasts only seconds, but those seconds fill the air with an electric tension that leaves you breathless when he finally pulls away.
The silence between you is heavy, as if both of you are trying to process what just happened. Axel says nothing, but his gaze tells you everything you need to know. The confusion, the urgency, the spark in his eyes from before is now a much stronger, more intense fire.
ā€œWhyā€¦?ā€ you start to ask, but you donā€™t know how to continue. The words get stuck in your throat.
Axel doesnā€™t respond immediately. He looks out at the sea, and when he finally meets your gaze again, his eyes are no longer so sure. Thereā€™s something different in them, something that mirrors your own confusion.
ā€œI donā€™t know,ā€ he says, his voice a low whisper, as if trying to understand it himself. ā€œIt just happened.ā€
Somehow, you understand. What just happened is confusing, unplanned, with no clear explanation. But you feel it. You know it. Thereā€™s something in the airā€”an undeniable attraction between the two of you, something beyond the tournament, beyond the competition.
There are no more words between you, but none are needed. The kiss spoke for both of you, and whatever this is, you both feel it.
After a few minutes, the silence becomes comfortable. Axel takes a step back, putting some distance between you, and even though itā€™s small, it feels vast.
ā€œWhat do we do now?ā€ you ask, knowing that nothing will be the same after this, but unsure how to move forward.
Axel looks at you, a barely perceptible smile forming on his lips. ā€œWe keep going. The tournament isnā€™t over yet.ā€
The sound of the waves grows stronger at that moment, along with the echo of returning to the dojo, to the tournament, to what lies ahead. Whatever has happened between you, thereā€™s still much left to understand, but you know that whatever comes next will be inevitable.
The tournament is abruptly canceled, chaos takes over, and Kwonā€™s death shakes everything. Everything comes to a halt.
In the end, the tournament resumes a month later, in All Valley. Axel and his dojo arrive, ready to continue what had been interrupted. But something in his gaze has changed. Thereā€™s an air of arrogance, a distance that wasnā€™t there before, something you canā€™t quite understand but that leaves a heavy feeling in your chest.
During one of the training sessions, Axelā€™s sensei approaches him, his voice grave as he observes his movements.
ā€œThey should fear you,ā€ he says. ā€œAnd if they donā€™tā€¦ā€
Axel hesitates for a moment, tension evident in his body. Then, the sensei delivers a cold order:
ā€œMake them.ā€
When Axel steps away, his demeanor has shifted. Heā€™s no longer the boy you saw on the beach, nor the one who kissed you on impulse. Now, he has become someone elseā€”someone determined to prove his strength in a much more ruthless way.
When you see him after a long training session with his dojo, you watch him, sensing that something inside him has brokenā€”as if the intensity of his internal struggle has led him to lose himself. Yet, you canā€™t help but approach.
ā€œWhatā€™s wrong with you?ā€ you ask, though you know there wonā€™t be an easy answer.
ā€œYou donā€™t know me,ā€ he says, his tone sharper than ever. ā€œSo stop looking for answers where there are none.ā€
And with those words, he turns and walks away, leaving behind an air thick with frustration. You stand there, watching his figure disappear, feeling as though the puzzle youā€™ve been trying to piece together still doesnā€™t fit.
Maybe youā€™ll never fully understand what happened between you and Axel on that beach. But one thing is certainā€”whatever happens between you two, it wonā€™t be easy to forget.
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wryuxim Ā· 2 days ago
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this has been in my drafts way too long, and again, i suck at writing, but iā€™ve really needed to say this. how the hell is millionsummers so normalized in the fandom? well i know why, but itā€™s honestly crazy to me how 90% of the pretty small amount of legato fans in existence ship him with knives. like do you even understand his character? sure if you havenā€™t read trimax (like too many people) you literally wouldnā€™t know anything significant about him since heā€™s just kinda there in the other iterations. all youā€™d see is evil guy x bootlicker right hand that have minimal interactions with each other. donā€™t get me wrong, i could get behind that. like it even. but the issue is that thereā€™s more to it than just that. even if you havenā€™t gotten to legatoā€™s backstory in the manga, itā€™s clear from the start that the way that knives treats him crosses the line of average evil toxic yaoi bull. like literally the very first time we see them interact knives casually shatters every bone in legatoā€™s body bro. causing irreparable damage and rendering someone a quadriplegic(?) after they were probably trying to get you a new body for the past 7ish years is so romantic, right!! He also just disregards him as a person and is generally shitty and all that which is kinda mean of him to do ngl. yeah you could say erm actually knives does care about legato though, heā€™s just too much of a stubborn bitch to show it!1!1!!1!! and i agree with that (to an extent, not getting into it though) but likeā€¦that doesnā€™t excuse the fact that heā€™s literally abusive. and that wasnā€™t even considering literally everything about legato himself. he was horrifically abused for as long as he could remember. he doesnā€™t know what a healthy relationship of any kind is. he chose to serve knives (despite being well aware of how he was) because he never knew a life outside of that. he thinks thatā€™s all heā€™s good for and knows he wonā€™t be anything more to knives, yet still kills himself trying to prove his worth. knives is someone he is unhealthily dependent on who causes him to become more and more self-destructive. just because knives isnā€™t the same as his previous abusers doesnā€™t mean itā€™s not just another shitty situation he fell into. i do think legatoā€™s feelings towards knives could be some sort of crush, but itā€™s more of a one-sided obsession than anything. to think that itā€™s an actually good cute little pairing baffles me. i think what iā€™ve said so far is enough of an argument, but thereā€™s still my main point left. i held back on this till now because of the crazy amount of people say he wasnā€™t for whatever reason, but legato was a CHILD when they met. like do yā€™all SERIOUSLY think heā€™s an adult here??
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i really donā€™t want to pull up panels from his backstory flashback, but you literally cannot convince me. nightow didnā€™t need to state it outright for it to be pretty obvious that he was a kid. we see how he draws other characters when they were younger as reference so you can clearly see the differences in proportion. i mean just compare it to how he looks throughout the rest of the manga, especially near the end. just because he doesnā€™t have a confirmed canon age doesnā€™t mean that there wasnā€™t an intent there. yā€™all are grasping at straws to justify it.
also the same applies to elendira (x knives) because of the super secret third legato flashback:
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i wonā€™t count this as proof for legato because tristamp (though a separate canon) kinda muddies it, but woah sheā€™s not an adult. also irrelevant but knives was smiling at him šŸ˜žšŸ˜ž iā€™d like to think he was nice to them at one point but this isnā€™t about that. the fact that people probably take this to fuel their millionsummers makes me very very sad.
back on topic though, thereā€™s another side of the copium spectrum. i canā€™t believe i have to say this, but iā€™ve no joke seen people say that legato and knives were both teenagers when they met as if that makes any damn sense. the twins are both confirmed over 150 years old. in trimax, the july incident happened ten years by the date before the events of the last few volumes (cited in my last post), and legato doesnā€™t look all that different in the two flashbacks. and the flashbacks or any other evidence i could pull out my ass donā€™t even actually matter because knives is old as fuck and legato is obviously a normal human age. again, itā€™s just straw grasping bro so please give up šŸ˜­šŸ™
and if you donā€™t give a shit and loooove grooming mentally ill teenagers you pick up off the streets then fuck off?? youā€™re gross and legato would hate your ass. i probably have more to say but i canā€™t think of anything rn so thatā€™s it for now. millionsummers is cringe and this fandom is a prison. but like a cartoon one where the bars have large enough gaps between them to walk through.
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creationandcalamityau Ā· 3 days ago
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Andrew and...Andrew??? Yeahhh
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So I decided to draw Andrew Harper and his very outdated design. To differentiate the both of them, I'll call his old design Drew for now (even though Andrew also goes by Drew sometimes too uhhh just forget about that XD)
It's hard to believe these are both the same person.
More yapping under the cut!
The reason I wanted to talk more about Andrew and his origins in the early versions of this AU is that yesterday marked the 1st anniversary of when I created him (February 1, 2024, to be specific is when I created his first concept art) Happy late birthday buddy!!
So for those who don't know, Andrew Harper was originally going to be evil in the earliest drafts of the fanfic. He was a vengeful creature with violent tendencies. He was honestly almost as bad as Joey himself. Which is wild to think of now that he's changed completely. Drew (as I'll call him to avoid confusion) was inspired originally by the once-popular theory of the ink demon being Joey Drew. Though BATDR clearly disproves this theory, I like the concept. I wanted a character who was like Joey but not actually him.
So then I remembered, "Hey, memory Joey exists!" and wondered how Joey managed to actually create memory Joey. Because I am not sure if he has a soul, or even truly what he is. He's stated to be a ghost or in his own words "A Memory." so I took this idea and was like "There had to be a prototype for Memory Joey." Thus Drew exists.
Joey to me comes across as the type of guy who wants to be immortal in his own creation. This lore is actually still very much canon to Andrew's backstory, but it was also the same backstory for Drew, though he had hardly any depth at this point.
Drew's backstory goes as follows; He was a sort of "Prototype of Memory Joey." A clone basically, but a very imperfect one. He was very similar to how Twisted Alice acts in many parts of the plot, wanting to become better than Joey Drew himself. He was very selfish and terrible overall. Not a chill dude.
When I was writing him in Charlie's section of the Creation and Calamity Fanfic, things shifted from Drew being evil to being just another victim of Joey's stupidity. Which is how Andrew Harper was born.
Andrew Harper was created in a similar way to Drew but I changed a bit of his backstory, providing him more of a personality than just "Angry Employee Who Got Screwed Over By Joey Drew" which was basically all he had to him. Andrew really started to grow on me while I wrote scenes with him in them. I got attached more to him being something other than an evil creature.
The whole thing about him being a clone of Joey is kind of less explicitly there in his current design. I like to believe it's because Joey is not smart and didn't realize it wasn't going to work.
Andrew himself actually doesn't really have many features of Joey at all, in fact, he's got more features from the Ink Demon than Joey. Kind of funny how that works. If I'm being fully honest I have no clue how the process of making someone into an ink clone of yourself works so this is really vague on purpose uhhhh yeah...
Andrew like Drew was also seen as a failure by Joey Drew, however, Andrew was mostly angry about the fact his identity was ripped from him. Drew was angry because he wasn't perfect.
I prefer Andrew over Drew. Andrew is more tragic than just evil because, idk he's angry or whatever Drew had going on.
For those who actually have no clue about Andrew Harper and have not understood a thing about this post, that's okay. I can try to summarize his current lore for you (Without going into too much detail cause his prequel will do that)
Andrew Harper is my oc and a major character in the fanfic for this AU. Andrew was an animator at the studio and a cartoonist. He was a hard worker, got things done on time, overall a good guy. He met his future wife Delilah after she was hired as an animator at the studio as well and took the vacant seat beside him.
The two of them got along well and Andrew clearly was very terrible at hiding that he had a crush on Delilah. Delilah and him both got married on May 6th, 1936 and got the date engraved in their wedding rings (THIS IS AN IMPORTANT DETAIL.)
As the studio starts going downhill and the checks don't seem to come in on time anymore, Andrew gets asked by Joey Drew for a deal of sorts. Andrew is reluctant but agrees, confused as to why Joey would pick him. There wasn't really any reason for him to be chosen, Joey just sucks.
Without going into far too much detail, the next thing Andrew knows is that he's become an ink creature. He is deemed as a failure by Joey who locks him in a room for the time being.
One day Andrew hears Delilah asking Joey about her missing husband and Andrew is unable to leave the room to tell her he's still alive. Joey lies to Delilah and basically just tells her Andrew is dead (he just says he's not sure but essentially Delilah takes it as he's dead for good)
Somewhere down the line, Andrew breaks out of the rooms Joey keeps trying to put him in, and he runs off into the studio, finding his way into The Cycle. There he struggles to remember who he once was.
The majority of his prequel story I will one day write will explore what he does during this time along with how he and Delilah met and all that.
During the main events of the fanfic he serves as a friend to Sammy and Charlie and helps them escape Twisted Alice and ends up remembering his past a bit more as time goes on.
He later on reunites with Delilah who is now a Lost One and they, after the events of Wilson taking over the cycle, take over what remains of Sammy's cult of followers. (THE LOST ONE SUPPORT GROUP is what it basically is now lol)
But yeah that's him. The silly guy. Feel free to ask questions about him lol. I don't mind. I am horrible at explaining things sometimes so I hope this was clear enough.
I have no idea what this post is but I'm giving it a new tag probably "From the Archives" will be the tag. All oc yapping posts are going to be tagged this from now on.
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icewindandboringhorror Ā· 6 months ago
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I made a few new wax seal stamps out of clay (like the ones I did for my worldbuilding stuff forever ago), this time just of random symbols that I thought might look good done in the style of painting over the raised part of the wax or etc. :0c Some of them aren't carved deep enough to really show up that well, but overall they worked okay for being clay lol
#wax seal#crafts#wax stamp#stationery#Window one is kind of stinky.. I was imagining like a swirly night sky sort of looking thing so it would be a surreal contrast of a night#sky with a window in the middle that shows a daytime sky - but the silver and purple wax kind of mixed too much together#with the black and it just looks very plain black and not all that starry or anything hjbhj.. Of course the eye is probably my favorite#since all I ever do is draw eyes and still like eye imagery for some reason. The four leaf clover is very lumpy and skrunkty but also it wa#the smallest in size out of all of them so was easier to do multiple stamps of just to try it out.#The heart with eyes wax is actually more swirly in person. I wanted it to be a mix of light pink and red and white. and the wax#did kind of all blend together but in person you can definitely see MORE of the intentional swirlyness. in this it just looks plain pink.#I was going to do one eye in the heart but it looked weird. but now two seems too plain. i could have done 3?? in a pattern.. hmm#alas. I wish I could make actual metal ones. With the clay i have to paint them in a thin layer of olive oil before stamping because#otherwise the wax just kind of gets stuck in the grooves of the clay and then you can't pull it up. Very wacky ''unprofessional'' looking#set up where I'm hot gluing circles of sculpey clay to short stumps of a wooden dowel that I sawed apart with a serrated bread knife#and then using an old paintbrush to put olive oil on them whilst holding a spoon over a yankee candle flame hjbjh#ANYWAY.. I think if I were middle class/rich/etc. this would be one of the main things in my crafting room is like.. SO many colors#of wax. and all different custom made stamps designed by me. which could be much more elaborate in actual metal.. muahaha.... >:)c#RHGghhh... I actually don't want to talk much about it since (this is probably just my Obsessed With My Own World Artist Delusions) I#think I have a really cool idea for a game that could genuinely be successful if i ever get to make it and I don't want to give#everything away and spoil the whole plot/concept in hopes that one day I can actually do it - BUT - a game that I'd like to make after the#visual novel I'm making now has partially to do with the main character working as a sort of writer/scribe/artist assistant in an elven#city (set in my world/with my worldbuilding species and versions of elves and etc) and I was thinking of maybe incorporating#somehow being able to collect little writing type items like these like.. you can get different wax seal patterns or pens or etc. when I do#stuff like this in Real Life it always makes me think of that like.. ouh... this is good research.. what it shall be like to be a littol#elf collecting wax seals and such.. indeed... GRR i need to be finished with my current game NOWWW... i MUST work on other#thingss... aughh... ANYWAY.. yay. accomplishment to do One Single Thing other than Sit In The Summer Heat And Rot#though also hilarious as this was the first cool-ish day that was below 80F in a while hgvh#waking up like 'wow.. i actually feel okay today?? like I could do things?? how mysterious.. I wonder why..?? :0'' Its The Weather You Fool#Tis Always The Weather
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problemswithbooks Ā· 6 months ago
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BNHA Ch. 429
So, I guess Toga is dead, and people are losing it.
I get why people liked her--she was actually queer, being pan/bisexual. She was representation for them and that's rare in shonen manga. But here's the thing--she was bad representation at best and insulting at worst. Nor do I think she was made queer because Hori really wanted to represent a queer girl. Himiko was always the author's poorly hidden fetish--she just was. She liked girls as much as boys because Hori wanted to draw a girl touching sexually on another girl. You can see this in how he draws her and Ochako in solo pics together.
I mean, people seem to understand this when it comes to Momo and her outfit being overly sexual or that both Himiko and Hagakure's Quirks either leave them naked or they have to be naked to use them. These are excuses to draw girls in a sexual manner. Himiko being into other girls is the same thing and that's the kindest interpretation.
Given how Himiko acts and her Quirk being heavily coded sexual desire, and therefore her use of it against someone unwilling being sexual assault, it could just being playing into harmful stereotypes of predatory gays.
As a queer person myself I just found Toga insulting. She was designed to be overly sexual and give the male author a female character that he could draw being suggestive with his other female characters. When he did flesh out her character, her backstory was eventually the trope/fear of straight people, that gay people will be so overcome with their lust that they end up sexually assaulting them.
In the end Ochako accepts this part of Toga and says she'll giver her blood forever, but as much as a lot of readers took that that as some deep lesbian confession, for me it really fell flat. Hori never really gave any of the main kids time to actually learn about their villain or show how that changed their minds toward them. Shoto only works because Touya is his brother (even though he admits he barely remembers him). But Ochako goes from not thinking of Toga at all pre-first war, to one thought about her during her speech, to suddenly caring about her so much she--given how Toga's quirk is coded, is willing to essentially fulfill Toga's kink for the rest of their lives.
It's weird and it comes out of nowhere. It's made even stranger because Toga doesn't actually change or show remorse for anything she did, which included personally hunting and murdering people before she joined the LOV. None of the death and destruction she is also partially responsible for is brought up either, something that Ochako was rightfully upset about during the first war when less people and property had been destroyed. Ochako just accepts everything about her suddenly and her past serious crimes are forgotten so they can cuddle and cry.
Am I shocked Toga died--a little. I didn't think Hori would have the guts to kill off a young girl character, especially one that he clearly got a lot of joy drawing in sexy poses. But at the same time, once he killed off Shigaraki and ended Touya's story with his slow death, I'm not surprised he went the same route with Toga.
This isn't Naruto--Hori isn't really kind to characters that do something wrong, especially if they don't try and change. Enji, Bakugo, Hawks, and Aoyama all sort of got punished for what they did. Enji is the worst off, being permanently crippled, missing an arm and burned everywhere. Bakugo's hand is damaged, his heart weaker, plus he feels bad that Izuku lost his Quirk so they can't compete the same way he wanted them to. Aoyama, despite doing way less wrong and even helping his class during the forest raid, still leaves school because he doesn't feel he earned being there yet. Hawks lost his Quirk and even though him running the HPSC could be seen as good for him, Hawks always wanted a break, but now he has one of the most time consuming and stressful jobs out there.
So, if this is what characters who actively did good things and even changed and fought to be better get, what would characters who never changed and never did anything positive for anyone but their friends/themselves get?
Before the last Arc started, when so many people said the LoV were 100% going to be redeemed I had doubts and always thought it wouldn't make sense with how the story presented redemption or treated other non-LoV villains in the past. That if the main LoV did get some happy ending where they were bffs with the main cast it would clash with how other characters had been treated.
That doesn't mean that I think how Shigaraki, Toga, and Touya ended up in the manga was well done. I think their endings fit far better then a last minute redemption would have, but at the same time you can feel how rushed everything has been since the end of the first war arc. Hori was done with this story months if not years ago, yet he was contractually obligated to finish it. Because of that I think he left out as much as possible. As much as I think he's written some pretty obsessive stuff, particularly towards women, I can't really fully blame him cutting corners or the story being shit at the end.
We know Manga authors, particularly those that work with Jump are treated like shit. That they suffer incredibly long hours at times not even getting to go home for days. We've gotten messages for Hori saying he's sick quite a few times. On top of that, weekly story telling is not a great way to tell a cohesive narrative. Ideas probably change week to week or at least month to month and you can't go back and change the last chapter no matter how much you need or want to. Then you remember he also gave a lot of ideas to the people who made the movies, which would also change his plans for how he wanted the main story to go.
The story is bad--it has been for a while, but I think a lot of people put their hopes on their favorite characters getting a happy ending, even when there were signs that probably wasn't going to be the case. I know how much it sucks when a character you love gets a shitty ending (Stain was my fav, but he got an absolute dogshit ending) but at least, knowing what I know about the industry I can't really blame Hori the way I see some other people doing. Criticize it, sure, but saying Hori hates his readers or is horrible writer isn't true. BNHA was popular for a reason--he's great with characters and the beginning of the story had some great pacing. We'll never know, but I wouldn't be surprised if BNHA could have been amazing if Hori had been treated better and the story hadn't needed a chapter every week.
If anything BNHA has taught me how much a story suffers when authors/artists are treated like crap and forced to work past burnout.
#bnha 429#bnha spoilers#bnha critical#bnha#idk i just feel bad for the guy#i think he's sexist as shit#but no one deserves to work under such bad conditions#and frankly idk how any weekly story turns out any good#especially when its gone on for so many years#like when you think about it the chapters aren't even real full chapters#they're like half or even a quarter of a chapter that you'd find in a book or monthly manga#of course you're your going to have an incoherent story when you write like that#I mean the only other thing written like that are some fanfictions#and those authors can and often do go back and edit things#heck I've seen some that go on hiatus with the specific purpose of overhauling the entire backlog of chapters to make it a better overall#and I think part of why BNHA is perhaps worse then other weekly shonen is because he had a lot he wanted to say#on top of trying to find things that kept him invested in a story he clearly was tired of writing#I mean Lady Nagnat is great example#he watched a movie and thought the female assassin character was cool and it got him excited to draw/write#so he shoehorned in this character that was really only there because she made the story more fun for him to write and draw for a while#like American comics aren't great either when it comes to consistency or coherent plots sometimes#but I do wonder if BNHA might have been better if Hori could have left a story bible and basic outlines of what his plans were#and then someone else could have worked on it instead#because he really didn't seem very into by the end of the first war arc#like I think he wished that had been the end#but it wasn't and he was really tired and burned out#and probably already working on fumes
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sskk-manifesto Ā· 3 months ago
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#Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#Mmmmmhhh#I had to step away and do something very quick after watching the episode so now I'm afraid I forgot all of it lol#Okay thoughts:#I'm afraid I'll keep saying this every time. Do not. Give me. An amv opening. Don't do that. Postpone your airing date. I don't care#I feel like I wasn't as pissed with it when they did that for s3 but it's probably a case of the s3 opening at least looked somewhatā€“#better (??) + you can make a mistake once but don't think I will let it slip a second time#Other than that... To be fair this episode was animated fairly well. I think you can really notice a big quality drop after theā€“#Ranpo-realizing-who-Kamui-is sequence but overall it's more than okay.#The colours of the ship irk me a little but to be fair I never thought colours were b/sd anime strong point...#This episode was sooooooo political in so many ways I could literally talk about it for hours#(don't test me I'm not kidding. Talking about politics in anime for hours is something I've done in the past and will do in the future.)#(Then again I study/think/breathe politics pretty much 24/7 so is that really surprising... )#I need to write an essay on Fukuchi's speech alone. The public speech communication techniques [redacted Italian politics comment].#The way he's welcomed [redacted eu parliament comment]. Unfortunately I don't have time for it but breaking it down very quickly#1. Suggesting to unify defences worldwide is INSANE. No one would ever take it. Probably going to be cynical here but there's one (1) thing#states care about and it's the independence of their own sovereignty (that is: no one has the right to come and tell what must be doneā€“#within one's borders). Eu has been trying to do exactly that (unify defences) for decades to no avail. Nato is on the brink of crumblingā€“#down. It's just... Such a distant perspective from how the world works right now? Idk.#Which brings me to 2. Even if it's deeply inconsistent with how world politics work the bsd un perspective is still very coherent withā€“#a latter thesis brought up in the manga that is ā€œcountriest tend to merge and come togetherā€ which is. Very anti-historical if you ask meā€“#but idk. Beautiful to imagine I suppose.#What else uhm... I liked the drawings this episode... Even Atsushi was back being pretty at some points... (Generally not really a fan ofā€“#what the style in the later seasons came to be). Also 55 Minutes reference ā€¼ā€¼ā€¼#I like Fukuchi's character so much......... I love idealist characters... And the inherent loneliness... The longing... The yearning!!!!!!#I love him so. Oh and I LOVED Akutagawa. I thought his entrance wouldn't have impacted me after all this time (and after knowingā€“#what episode 3 will be lol). And yet it was such an emotional moment!!!! What do you mean Atsushi is scared to be alone and Akutagawa isā€“#coming for him!!!!!! I'm crying all my tears. And Akutagawa was so cool in the end!!! By heart was beating so fast!!!!!#It's the etheral blurred light...#The way he still manages to come off so cool despite being inherently pathetic is nothing short to miraculous
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slumbergoblin Ā· 1 year ago
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Hi Mei :)
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camellcat Ā· 2 years ago
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I wonder if Scott's alpha teeth made him nervous even after he got used to them just Being A Thing Now. If, when he would catch the glint of red eyes staring back at him, he had to still an instinctive flinch and try not to think of all the people who have threatened to or almost ended his life with that same vibrant hue. If the feeling of blood under his claws, on his skin, in his hair and soaked into his clothes ever became normal, if it was ever something truly able to be numbed and ignored. If seeing his shadow with pointed ears and elongated claws and shredded shirts gave him day terrors like the Nogitsune never went away; a paranoia that everyone could see how fucking messed up (how scary) he was. If Scott ever truly moved on from feeling afraid of being a monster, of becoming a Monster. Not all monsters do monstrous things, but all Scott has ever seen is monsters who choose to act like their namesake.
If he continues to be cautious and aware of his teeth, of his eyes, of how blood is overwhelming and what it's like to be afraid --- because if he looses his humanity, his tie to slow healing and faulty lungs and what it feels like to be prey to somebody else, how will he be any different from the monsters that plague him?
Scott is the outlier, and he does not let his monstrous features define how he chooses to behave and who is chooses to be.
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turtlespancake Ā· 7 months ago
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me when i write a character who is prone to dooming themself and then they run off and doom themself. core traits are stubbornness and a willingness to disregard their own humanity gET BACK HERE IM NOT DONE WITH YOU
#rambling#surprisingly this is not about jakob.. im just really consistent about my favorite character archetypes šŸ˜­šŸ˜­#WARNING THE NOTES ON THIS ARE REALLY LONG I STARTED RAMBLING#ā€œouhh i have a headache i'll just lie down and rotate my blorbos in no general direction for a while until it goes awayā€ and then boom.#serious plot considerations. 2 questions answered 24million new questions raised. this is specifically Not what i asked for.#so now im sitting here STILL dizzy running mental calculations on how i can get this bitch out of peril without reworking everything#but they literally keep dying in every timeline šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ every single plausible road leads to them running off and screwing themself over#ā€œcharacter who doesn't realize they want to live until it's way too late to look backā€ VS#ā€œcharacter who is forced to live and handle the things they never though they'd survive long enough to deal withā€ FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.#fucking hell i have never had this much trouble writing a character as i have with them#they genuinely do just run off and do shit without my permission and then i have to pace for an hour or two wondering#ā€œok they wOULD do that. but should they. do i feel like i can confidently write that.ā€#im like constantly in this tug of war trying to get them to CHILL#but also they are absolutely my favorite character from the entire project. but like. FUCK GET BACK HERE#is death the most satisfying end to this arc? is someone who was Set on dying then NOT dying the most satisfying end to the arc?#how many bridges can you burn until you irreparably set yourself aflame too?#would ghost or revival plotline work?? would it make sense with the worldbuilding??#do i just Like Them enough to want them to not die?? where do i draw the line between personal bias and a good arc?#is death not feeling as impactful as survival solely because i've been writing for so long that it's lost the initial impact?#and other such plot considerations...#im gonna have such an easy time writing another character though šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ because THAT character's dynamic in the second act#is to stare at character 1 and be like ā€œwhy are you like this. i mean i know Why but can you chill. please.ā€ and like damn bro me too#actually wait no i think kaey.a is the hardest character i've ever written i take it back#had to worry about his 20million facades AND his Actual feelings AND canon compliance. shit is hard#i still havent finished the k/aeya fic i started back when the chasm first released which is uhh. two years ago. oops.#i think i struggle writing emotionally repressed liars i think thats what this is šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ anyways.#(voice of guy who has been obsessed with nonlinear narratives and tragedies for several years):#ā€œis it too much to kill this character in a nonlinear exploration game with tragic elementsā€#like bitch what are you talking about šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ YOU'RE the target audience here figure it out#sorry the notes on this are just my writing journal now apparently
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jichanxo Ā· 9 months ago
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how different is your creative process between writing and drawing (and in which areas)? do you have a different approach in each artform? if you have an idea, you first think how you'd write it or draw it?
This is definitely going to be long so. Cut.
Just to preface, obviously both writing and drawing are a form of art, but I tend to use the word ā€œartā€ when I mean illustration or drawing, so thatā€™s what Iā€™m going to do here. And of course a disclaimer that Iā€™m only speaking to my subjective experience.
Tbh I donā€™t think my approach to both is that different from each other, which is odd, because Iā€™m used to thinking of them as very different processes. Probably because the mediums themselves are so different. But like with my writing, I tend to improvise. Feel it out, see how things go, throw ideas at the wall. I would probably say that Iā€™m more willing to experiment with/scrap my art than my writing. Probably because Iā€™m more confident with my art than my writing, so I find it easier to make judgments like that, or because Iā€™ve made so much that throwing stuff away when it isnā€™t working is very easy. I get a bit more precious about my writing. I always want to keep it or at least try to adapt it into something less bad, lmao. Iā€™m also just not as confident in my ability to judge what writing is worth keeping or worth permanently deleting. I just havenā€™t polished that skill for writing as much as I have for art.
With regards to planning my art ā€“ I definitely do sometimes, because I consider art my Serious Hobby, which means I do like to have a go at more serious projects as opposed to just improvising all the time (a contrast to my writing where my only ā€œserious projectā€ is senseific, and I fell into that by accident). The things I plan out are the idea/s I want to convey, and what imagery would express that. (like this IW art, and the second one in this umineko post) Or sometimes the imagery gets stuck in my head and I work from that. (yagamiā€™s hair clinging to his neck here)
I actually find that planning too much can be detrimental to my art process. That is to say, not in terms of figuring out ideas/themes, but doing too much drafting. I find it very difficult to do things like clean lineart unless Iā€™m having a Weirdly Good Art Moment, so I just donā€™t. Hence a lot of my art is very sketchy. Iā€™m just not good at capturing the same looseness with ā€œproperā€ lineart than with my sketches, so I keep them. Not worth fussing over. This is what works for me.
(even in this, and the first image here, you can see a lot of breaks and incomplete looking lines. not to say necessarily that this is a bad thing of course, but you can see that even in what I consider my ā€œpolishedā€ work, I wonā€™t use ā€œproperā€ linework, but instead a high quality/detailed sketch. I imagine some other artists would have their proper linework stage after these sketches, but i choose to stop here)
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this probably reads like Iā€™m talking myself down, but thatā€™s not really what Iā€™m meaning to say ā€“ my point is that I donā€™t figure out details even for my bigger pieces, and that with drawn art I have a better time judging where my time is best spent. I donā€™t think I have a strong understanding of my writing by comparison, so I canā€™t decide how to play to my strengths or anything like that, I just have to see how i go.
For writing, either itā€™s ā€œiā€™m in the mood for itā€ or ā€œiā€™m not in the mood for itā€. For art, itā€™s ā€œtoday is a good day/bad dayā€, ā€œtodayā€™s a painting dayā€, ā€œtoday feels like maskingā€, ā€œtoday I just want to sketchā€, ā€œtoday Iā€™m too loose for what I want to work onā€, ā€œtoday Iā€™m too stiffā€. You can see the difference in my ability to judge, yeah? So a big difference is to do with just my own (relative) inexperience with writing as opposed to drawing.
I think the other major factor is the differences in the mediums themselves. A fanfic is sequential. Thereā€™s a change in time. Illustrations are by nature a single moment in time. Big difference there. Of course, there are comics and animatics and other art thatā€™s both drawn and sequential, but since I donā€™t do a lot of that, just count that as exceptions for now (and in a way, those are kind of like a combination of writing and illustration, arenā€™t they?) I find there are some ideas that are conveyed easier or better through writing, and others where the better option is art.
So to answer your last question, often ideas come to me pre-packaged as a ā€œwriting ideaā€ or an ā€œart ideaā€, rather than having to decide that separately. In the case that a sequence is better conveyed with a visual element, thatā€™s when itā€™s comic time. The gorillashipping comic is a great example of this. The punchline is at its best when itā€™s not explained in words, and the expression of the final panel does all the heavy lifting. I pitched this idea initially in words (as a joke on discord), but the comic version has more punch.
Comics are also great for when you want to avoid explaining context, and for when you want to force the reader to take a specific pace. Hereā€™s the example Iā€™m thinking of.
The visual space dedicated to the fighting forces you to take time to process, and that time is important for the buildup to the punchline. This wouldnā€™t work as well if we cut this down to, say, the four panels of the last example. So yeah, timing. And then my other point ā€“ context ā€“ why are these two fighting? I donā€™t know. Where are they? I donā€™t know. Itā€™s not necessary for the joke. The same is true of the gorillashipping joke. How did the relationship between kiryu and kaito happen to make this even remotely possible? I donā€™t know. But I donā€™t need to explain it in a joke comic. With writing I find that it feels more necessary to make context clear to the reader so they understand whatā€™s happening, but with illustrations, itā€™s a lot easier to skip over that. Obviously this isnā€™t impossible in a written format, but thatā€™s just my personal opinion.
Admittedly I think this second example is doable with just pure writing (replace all the panels with descriptions of the fight that take long enough to simulate the time it takes for the reader to digest the build up, then make the punchline a wham line, yknow), but it varies on a case to case basis. Also I would not want to write fighting. Lmao. Iā€™m notā€¦ any good at that. So I guess it is also just in part about playing to strengths.
Anyway, enough comic side tangent. Iā€™ve already started talking about it there, but was going to do a comparison between writing and art as mediums. The main thing, I find, is that they have different strengths. More than strengths/weaknesses though, the mediums themselves convey some things with ambiguity, and other things with detail.
Like I first mentioned, time: itā€™s easier to convey the passage of time with writing than with illustration. And like I said before with comics ā€“ conveying context ā€“ because an illustration captures a single moment in time, itā€™s a lot easier to avoid context entirely, while itā€™s harder to avoid in writing. Iā€™ve drawn kuwagami cuddles before, and thereā€™s no background, nothing discernable as to the lead up or any other detail. And thatā€™s great! I donā€™t want to have to invent a plausible reason for them to end up hugging. I can just do it, right? But sometimes itā€™s the context that makes things significant, so you do want it there. A better job for writing. Writing allows you to be detailed with your context, while illustration leaves it ambiguous. Different strengths. You just pick which best fits the situation.
Itā€™s a similar case for a lot of different factors ā€“ they're conveyed differently through both mediums, and depending on your idea, some results are more desirable than others. Rather than explaining, itā€™s probably better to do a direct comparison. (If it makes any difference to your curiosity, I did the drawing first then the writing. Youā€™ve caught me on a good art day, what a nice sketchā€¦)
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Iā€™ll try not to talk too much because I think the comparison and table say enough, but you can see how, despite depicting basically the same thing, these two things feel pretty different from each other. The mediums do different things. The mood of both is similar, but not quite the same. Itā€™s these differences that inform the choice of mediums instinctually. (but again. points at disclaimer. as is true with all ā€œrulesā€ about art, none of these are absolute. you can make an illustration that conveys a strong context. you can write fic that favours describing facial expressions and leaves the intended emotion ambiguous. iā€™m generalising to make a point here.)
I guess the other thing is that itā€™s pretty easy to do writing in bed on my phone compared to my art setup, lmao. Convenience and timing also play into it probably.
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bmpmp3 Ā· 10 months ago
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dysgraphic artiĘØts risɘ UP!!!!!
#raise your pencils!!!! and erasers. to fix the backwards letters šŸ˜”#sorry still thinking about my weirdness with my art professors. yknow a lot of em have been really pushing us as#students to make our personal identities a major part of like our 'brand' as artists#which. well from an art history major perspective thats a very contentious and nuanced topic. i love a lot of artists who live this way#and i think its great seeing my peers who focus on identity thrive. but also as an fine arts major (double major fool LOL)#i keep getting pushed by teachers into like. specific '____ artist' identities???#specificaly woman artist. which is a little bizarre because im a bit fat and a bit gnc so im generally like. ungendered? in day-to-day life#(which doesnt actually matter to me directly that much honestly LOL people tend to view me as like. buddy? buddy or pal.)#(not man. not woman. not anything human. sometimes i remind people of a beloved dog. which. hkdsahjk thats its own can of worms)#(a can of worms that also doesnt matter much to me directly because im a wannabe furry who chose to be the dog when playing house as a kid)#(LOL so um. well. theres that) but yeah i dunno i dont really consider myself a woman artist. its been. shockingly (and sometimes luckily?)#irrelevant to most of my life and experiences and art (although dont get me wrong misogyny is very real and very present) so i dont#have a whole lot to say about it from an art perspective. you could also call me all kinds of things. a queer artist. a mixed race artist#again technically correct. some aspects more visible in my work than others. but also very technical. i focus on race a lot in in my#art historical work but i dunno how much my drawings have to say. except that i keep making too many mixed ocs LOL#i dunno i just think my professors gotta focus that energy away from tokenizing me and over to supporting like actual#capital W Woman artists capital Q Queer artists capital A Artists of Colour who are doing far more interesting things than I#far more thought out and engaged in these topics directly. i just kind of stumble into my art blindly and confused <3#sorry that was a long tangent WHAT IM SAYING Is despite all that: i do consider myself a capital D Dysgraphic artist#i think its an unmovable constant of my art and the way i draw and the way my hands move. the untrained eye doesnt seem to be as aware#of it directly. but those who are familiar can probably see it. the dysgraphia LOL if not just from whenever i write a letter or number#half of them are busted and frantically fixed HDKJSDJDS but its in all my art. if u can see it <3 ive been trying to embrace it#dygraphic artists raise your pencils indeed!! and throw away the eraser!!! make the legibility of your words everyone elses problem!!!#what does that say? what is that sketch? none of my business! none of your business!! its the business of my hand and the pencil alone#motor skill and spatial issues take the wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel
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