#i really really really should work until next april because i'm moving then

[clowndensation]

*guy who MUST work at this job for at least another 2 months, but should really work it until next august voice* <- he is speechless due to the toxic miasma that surrounds him

[jealousmartini]

Oh, nothing much, just a list of reasons why I am so excited to permashift to my ultimate 4d reality //better current reality//

∘₊ ✧───────────────────✧₊∘

— EXPERIENCING DESIRED SCENARIOS

I am a hardcore daydreamer just like my brother and sister shifters(you guys🫵🏾), and I can't wait to really live the silly imagines I always have in my head. Even if it's something relatively small, I will still get to live every second of them.

Idk if some of you guys will remember that one post where I mentioned Googlebox? But I'm mentioning it again🙄 because I scripted me, my love of my life, his sister who is my bff, my own girl bff and her boyfriend are part of the program teehee. I swear no one will ever understand how much of a comfort show Googlebox is to me and in general.

The idea of being on TV whilst watching TV and relaxing with my favourite people and eating my favourite food just makes me melt. It's such a core memory to me and idk I just love showing off how perfect my family is to everyone else

— FOOD

I can't wait for all the delicious food I'll get to eat. There will never be a single time where I have to eat something I don't like or don't want to ever again, because why should I have to? I'm mostly excited to have stuff like popeyes, McDonald's, seafood boils, those Korean and Japanese foods you see on mukbangs, loads of fruit bowls (I really do love fruit), basically everything meat/barbecue, pasta including ramen, and sweets too cus🧍🏿‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

— NO UGLY CLOTHES ALLOWED

Never will there be a day or night where I will ever need to wear clothes that don't suit me or clothes I don't like. My closet is going to be full of the cutest and gorgeous late 90s and early 2000s skirts, shirts, bellbottoms, flares, jackets, oversized ts, shorts, belts, slippers, jewelry, panties and bras etc etc

— ALREADY COMPLETED WORK

In my better cr, I scripted that I am already miles ahead of everyone in college work (and best believe all my work is at distinction level) so I have all the time in the world to do what I want until the next brief; I also scripted the date of month that I will wake up in my better cr in is the 17th April last week so I will have only 3 days of college next week (because i go in on mondays, tuesdays, wendsays and Thursdays) and 4 weeks of freedom to myself. (I also scripted my teachers let me do my own art work in my free time in class, cus sometimes all a girl wants to do is draw their ocs🥺)

Edit :: 17th of may now!!

— CURRENTLY IN MY MOVING ERA

In better cr, I am kind of in the planning process of moving out of my house to my apartment penthouse with my friend group. I'm thinking of moving out at 18 or 19 years old since I'm 17 rn and I still want to explore my better cr house cus it's wayyyy better than this one. But even once I've moved out I'll probably keep visiting my old home where my mum and her husband lives because.

∘₊ ✧───────────────────✧₊∘

Overall, I am so excited to experience everything I have ever dreamed of. I know I deserve my freedom and peace, excitement, and joy. Being able to just do what I want when I want and always knowing that no matter what, everything is going to be okay.

Life is so amazing, and it's so worth living. I know I will manifest my desired reality in no time, and I know all of the stress, time, anxiety, and patience won't be for nothing. Life is mine to explore, and I can't wait to do so

@4ellieluv @livingmydreamlife5555 @theshifterbear @cocozydiaries

[whump-imagines]

Ice

Will & reader (could be platonic or early relationship.)

900 words

For anyone else who was missing a certain red head on Wednesday...

You felt like Bambi trying to make your way across the parking lot toward the hospital. Between sleeping through your alarm and the icy road conditions you were running very late for your shift. In your haste to get out of the house, you’d thrown on your regular shoes rather than your boots.

About halfway to the door your tractionless shoes slipped and you took a full cartoon style fall– both feet up in the air to land hard on your back. The hit knocked the wind from your lungs and it took a moment to suck in a breath.

Seconds later, the pain registered. Your back and head hurt. Before you could even think of what you should be doing next, Will was kneeling beside you.

“Don’t move,” he said. He started to run his fingers down either side of your neck in search of any abnormalities. “You hit your head pretty good. Does it hurt?”

You coughed, your lungs still trying to function properly. “Uh, yeah. My back too, kinda like up between my shoulders.”

“Okay, can you squeeze my fingers?” He placed two fingers against both your palms and you did as he'd asked. “Good, and push against my hands like you're pushing the gas pedal.” Again, you did as asked.

“Fuckin’ ice,” you muttered quietly.

“Okay. Do you think you can sit up?” Will asked.

You took another deep breath. “Yeah.” He offered his hand and very slowly pulled you into a seated position. You closed your eyes tightly as dizziness set in. “Woah.”

“Talk to me, sweetheart.”

You peeled your eyes open, locking into his concerned ones. “Just dizzy. Really dizzy.”

“You probably have a concussion,” Will suggested.

A shiver ran down your spine. “Yeah, well, won't matter if I freeze to death out here.”

Will chuckled. “We are going to move slowly. I don't need you passing out because you stood up too quickly.” He shifted so he could stand to help you up. “Ready?”

“Yup.” You winced as you straightened up, pain flaring through your back. You took half a step to get closer to Will and your feet slipped slightly. You gripped onto his arm so tightly your knuckles turned white.

“Okay, you're okay. I got ya.” He started to walk slowly and carefully towards the doors.

Once you made it to dry flooring, you sighed in relief. Will kept your hand wrapped around his arm as he headed towards the nurses station.

“Hey, Mags,” he greeted. “What's open? She took a hard fall outside.”

“Oh, sweetie.” She rubbed your shoulder gently. “Take treatment one.”

“Thanks,” said Will. “Can I get thoracic and cervical spine x-rays and a head CT?”

“And something for the pain? Please?” You asked.

“Let's get 50 micrograms of fentanyl, too,” Will added. “Oh, and a warm blanket.”

“You got it,” Maggie noted all the requests in the tablet she was holding. “Any blood work?”

“No, just the scans for now.”

About an hour later, you had finished all the scans and were trying your best not to doze off under your second warm blanket. April had brought a new one when she'd come to check your vitals.

Will came in with the tablet in his hands. “How're you feeling? In too much pain?”

You gave him a thumbs up. “I'm possibly too comfy. I'm fighting the nap hard.”

“Good news then. You can nap shortly,” he said.

“Yay!” You said lazily.

“You do have a mild concussion,” he explained. “As well as two bruised ribs. So you're stuck here for observation until at least tomorrow but you can sleep if you want.”

“Well that's gonna hurt tomorrow. Awesome,” you added sarcastically.

Will squeezed your hand gently. “At least nothing is broken. Get some rest, alright?”

“Mmhmm,” you hummed, already giving into the pull of sleep.

You had no idea how much time had passed when you woke up. It seemed a safe guess that the pain was what had roused you. It felt like someone was digging a knife into your shoulder blade and breathing made it even worse.

You groped around the bed for the call button as tears welled in your eyes. A moment later, you found it and proceeded to push it several times. April pushed the curtain back soon after.

“You're awake,” she stated.

A tear rolled down your cheek. “It hurts. It hurts a lot. I feel like I can't even breathe.”

She quickly moved closer and took your hand. “Just squeeze as hard as you need to. Take slow breaths.” Within a few minutes she had calmed you down quite a bit. “I'm gonna go find someone to get you something for the pain. I'll be right back.”

She leaned out the door and you heard her tell someone that you needed something for pain. Will came in a second later and gave April a dosage for morphine.

“That should help,” he started. “I'll make sure to get you a prescription before we send you home too. Sound good?”

“Thanks, Will,” you said. He took your hand. “What would I do without you?”

He laughed. “Probably would have just frozen to death in the parking lot. So my shift is over soon and you're getting moved upstairs. What do you say to some pizza and a movie?”

“Ooh, yes. Please! Hamburger, bacon and extra cheese for me.”

“Okay. I'll see you upstairs in an hour or so.”

[ckret2]

👀 I want to hear more about this Bill AU

You were the very first person to send me an ask about the Bill AU, and it was an open-ended question, so I've been saving your ask special for... a fanfic. IDK how often or how much I'm gonna write actual full fic for this AU but for now, here: the first half of Bill's reunion with the Pines family. (Attempted murder included.)

(Edited 7/28/2024 - now compatible with TBOB!)

####

February 25, 2013

The vengeful demon standing in the door of the Mystery Shack possessed only four items in the universe:

Two safety pins.

A time tape tied around his waist like a belt.

And a tunic he'd fashioned himself in the style of an ancient Greek Doric chiton, folded and pinned so perfectly that the wearer must have seen them thousands of years ago when they were at the height of fashion.

Soos couldn't identify an authentic Doric chiton. All he knew was that the tourist who'd just come in looked like a short fat lady with brown skin, curly golden hair, weirdly skinny arms, bulging jaundiced eyes, and a toga made out of a bright purple children's Pony Heist bedsheet.

Soos laughed, flashing the tourist a double thumbs up. "Hey! Awesome toga. That should really be like a thing. Imagine if we all wore togas. We could just wake up, roll our bedsheets around us like a burrito, and go out!"

"Watch out, you can't tell when Big Fashion is listening in." 

"Haha. Who?"

The tourist hadn't looked at Soos once; instead, her gaze was darting around the shop restlessly.

"Are you shopping for something specific?" Soos asked with his best customer service voice. "Post cards? Snow globes? Weird taxidermy thingamajigs? Pants?"

"Where are the Pines?" the tourist asked, casting a sharp look at the "employees only" door, then the vending machine.

"Oh, Mr. Pines! The original Mr. Mystery! Heh—he actually retired a few months ago. The Mystery Shack's under new management!" Soos planted his fists on his hips and puffed up his chest. "It's me, I'm the new management."

"But where are they?" the tourist pressed.

"Uhh, he and his bro are somewhere in South America, I think? Hey, if you wanna meet him in person, his last letter said he might visit for spring break if the family can make it. First week in April."

"First week in April," the tourist muttered. She glanced over her shoulder toward the door, thoughtfully fiddling with the time tape wrapped around her waist.

"Oh, dude! I've tried to use a tape measure as a belt too! Haha! It worked great, until I bumped the button and it retracted. Yeesh. Hey, do you want a fur belt? We sell fur belts now." Soos turned away, rummaging through the new display next to the t-shirts. "They're all sustainably, ethically harvested! I bought a bunch of old rugs from the Northwest Manor to slice up."

Soos grabbed up a fuzzy pink belt. "Check it, I think this is unicorn hide or something. Bet it'd go so good with that Pony Heist toga..."

The tourist had seemingly vanished in thin air. Soos looked around. "Huh." He shrugged and stuck the belt on a shelf beneath the cash register in case she came back and decided she wanted it later.

Once all the other visitors had left for the day, and Soos was left alone to clean up, he thought back to that togaed tourist whose yellowish eyes had never stopped moving—the way she'd looked toward the door as though worried someone was following her. Soos glanced around the shop nervously. "Is anyone there?" He lifted his broom like a samurai sword. "Hello? Big Fashion?"

Nothing answered. He shrugged and kept sweeping.

###

April 1, 2013

A vengeful demon who possessed nothing but two safety pins, a time tape belt, and a purple Pony Heist bedsheet chiton stood in the center of the Mystery Shack gift shop.

Which was weird, because Soos didn't hear the door and she totally hadn't been standing there a moment ago.

"Oh hey! Toga Lady!" Soos turned to Wendy, who was picking up a few bucks working spring break while Melody visited her family. "It's Toga Lady. She came in like a month ago. The toga's cool, right? I think it's cool."

Wendy glanced up, choked back a laugh, and scrambled to grab her phone for a picture.

"So, where are the Pines?" Toga Lady asked, with an edge of impatience.

"Oh, dude, did you come all the way back here to meet them? Sorry, the Mr. Pineses couldn't make it. They couldn't get a flight out of Atlanta." Soos stopped, frowned, and pulled a water-stained letter from his pocket to double check. "Sorry, Atlantis. Something about a giant lobster attack?"

"Daryll would pick now to invade," Toga Lady muttered. "I suppose the children aren't here."

How did she know about the children? Maybe she'd visited last summer and remembered them? Like, early summer, before Pony Heist came out. Soos would have remembered the toga. "Naw, heh. They went to Roswell."

"Oh, cool," Wendy said distractedly, busy texting a picture of Toga Lady to everyone she knew. "Checking out the competition."

"Yeah, Dipper's sending me like a billion pictures of the alien museum."

"Well," Toga Lady said impatiently, "when are they showing up?"

Soos was beginning to get the impression that Toga Lady was less an admiring fan, and more one of those customers. The kind that used speaking to the manager as a threat. All the same, he said, "June first, for sure. That's when the kids get here for summer break so the Mr. Pineses are coming too. Definitely. Promise."

She rolled her eyes—one of them twitched, like she'd gotten something in it and was struggling to keep it open—but said, "All right, fine! June. What's the difference? I've waited this long." She leaned next to the door by the snow globe shelves, fiddling with her belt, as if she was settling in to wait right there for the next two months.

Soos frowned—she might drive off tourists, blocking the door like that—but said, "Oh! While you're here, I thought you might be interested in this belt." He reached past Wendy to grab it from beneath the cash register. "I didn't get a chance to show you last time before—"

He looked toward the door. She was gone. "Huh. Did you see Toga Lady leave?"

Wendy shrugged. "Wasn't looking."

"Huh." Soos replaced the belt. At least he knew when he'd see her next.

###

June 1, 2013

"What's with the belt?" Stan asked.

"Oh! It's for a regular." Soos pointed with both hands at the fuzzy pink belt peeking beneath his suit jacket. "I think she's comin' today. She wanted to meet the original Mr. Mystery."

"Hey, an admirer." Stan's chest puffed out and his grin widened. "Is she cute?"

"Uh... if you like bedsheet togas?"

"Ooh, a party girl."

"These are new," Ford said, inspecting a jar with an alien fetus floating in green goo.

"Oh, yeah!" Soos said, following as Stan joined Ford at the glass display case. "Dipper sent me like, a billion keychains of these little alien guys from Roswell. So I started filling Abuelita's empty spice jars with aliens and green jello. Cool, huh? It looks like we stole them from a secret government lab or something."

Stan laughed, slinging an arm around Soos. "Listen to this! Brilliant! I knew I put the right guy in charge."

Soos grinned goofily. "Aw, gee, Mr. Pines..."

A flash of purple caught the corner of his eye. Toga Lady was leaning next to the door by the snow globe shelves, fiddling with her belt.

Here was a chance to show off his great business instincts with Stan watching. Time to make a sale. "Oh, hey, Toga Lady! I didn't hear you come in! Still rockin' Pony Heist, huh? Hey, I've been trying to show you this belt I think you'll like..."

But she wasn't listening to him. Her gaze was fixed on the Pines twins' backs. As Soos watched, her expression darkened, and her grin widened.

The vengeful demon reached past the snow globes, seized a heavy "mysterious green crystal cluster ($250)" made of glue and broken glass, and heaved it up over his head. "Hey, Sixer!" Face contorted in a snarl of a smile, he turned the cluster over, sharp shards pointing downward. "Welcome home!"

Bill Cipher swung the glass weight down toward Ford's head.

(If you wanna keep reading, all chapters are on tumblr right here!)

[violetswritingg]

Thunderstruck

Tyler Owens x OFC!

Description: When cowgirl meets cowboy after a year of no-contact and chaos ensues during storm season!

Rating: M (Mentions of blood and death in Tornadoes and storms alike, angst and loss of loved ones, car accidents, Tornado aftermath, and injury to characters, slight age gap (5 years))

Hey! I don't normally post my writing on here, I'm normally only on Wattpad but I decided to cross post and so here is the first of many fics to be moved over here and enjoyed as well! I hope you guys enjoy the story, I honestly have no idea who many chapters this is going to be lol.

Want to read the other chapters?

Click here

1

April, 2005

Oklahoma

The sound of silverware on plates was all that could be heard, but that was normal for a Thornton-Harding-St. James family dinner. Nathan and Juliette had been tense all dinner barely saying a word to each other. All since Jo and Bill had arrived all smiles. The women's mother Michelle, and both Jo and Bill watching the parents as if they were an active bomb ready to go off at any moment. Nathan was at least trying. Smiling, as best he could, and making polite conversation when prompted, the father mainly focused on Riley who sat on his other side. Making sure she wasn't playing with her food.

At six she should know better, and he needed to teach her it was rude to waste the food someone had worked really hard to make for them. But now that the food had been eaten, there wasn't much distraction left to hide behind.

"Uh, so, Julie, how's Riley been doing in school?" Jo tried; she really did. But Juliette was mean on a good day and that day was not today. The empty wine glass next to her being her fourth, and once she got to drinking her temper just got worse.

"She's doing fine." Juliette sniffed as she sat up straighter, a forced smile on her face. Eyes narrowed as she settled into a defensive position. "Why?"

"No reason, just making conversation." Jo sighed, looking at Bill for a second before meeting Nathan's grimaced grin. Trying not to cause a scene in front of everybody was taking all his will power, wanting nothing more than to snap at Juliette and shake her. Hoping that would maybe change her entire personality, the one he hadn't seen until she was telling him she was pregnant and that it was his all those years ago.

"Right." Juliette scoffed, "You have no right to judge me, you don't even have a kid!" her jaw snapped shut, eyes blistering as she spat her words at her older sister. Jo tensed up and Riley had started to pay attention to the adults at the table instead of finishing her little slice of pie. Nathan wanted to crawl into a hole and die, take Riley with him far far away from Juliette. Riley loved Jo and Bill though and he couldn't just do that. Michelle was over the moon when she found out she was going to have a grandbaby, she's 75 now and doesn't have a lot of time left to spend with anyone, much less Riley, not with how her health had been declining recently. The stress of living in Tornado alley having taken its toll after her husband was taken in that fateful storm.

Riley was her whole world. Michelle watched her when Nathan, Bill, and Jo were out storm chasing. Juliette, even though she lived in the same house, the Harding family farm. Being rebuilt on the same land, Michelle couldn't bare to leave it behind after the original house was destroyed. Riley didn't mind it, even though she missed her dad, she loved getting to hang out with Grandma. They were like best friends. But Nathan had needed to start taking Riley with him and his team because of her health issues, and because he knew that Juliette would leave Riley to her own devices for however long he was gone, the almost 6 year old hanging out in the tech van usually a couple miles behind him and always a safe distance from the storm in pursuit.

"I am very much aware of that Juliette." Jo grit out, Bill reaching out an arm around her shoulders, the couple had hit their early 40's, still childless, still chasing. But had been entertaining the idea of settling down after one too many close calls. The topic of having kids was a sensitive one, they had been trying quietly for about a year now and no luck. Something Jo had shared with her sister and Nathan in confidence.

"The food was great Michelle-" Bill tried to move onto another topic, but got blocked.

"I'm not surprised though, I'm sure there's cobwebs up there at this point." Juliette cruelly laughed. "I'm sure Bill will move on to a younger model when he finally realizes you'll never be able to produce."

"Juliette May Thornton! You watch your-"

"What mom?" Juliette turned on Michelle next, the elderly woman sitting taller in her chair, white hair pulled back in a simple style, warm eyes worn and normally full of life. Now though, they only held disappointment in her youngest daughter. "There it is. There's the look. I'm not going to take this; I am not going to be attacked in my own goddamn house." Julliette huffed and pushed out her chair with a sharp scrape against the wood flooring and stomped upstairs.

Nathan let out a deep sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose, as Riley's little voice called out for her mom. Only to be ignored.

"Why don't you go turn on some cartoons okay baby? You got 30 minutes until bedtime, you get one show and then in the bath for you okay?" Nathan picked up his daughter and hauled her into his lap, booping her nose, causing light giggles to erupt.

Riley's dark blonde curls bouncing as she nodded quickly, Nathan setting her on her feet and the adults chuckled as she all but ran. Already hearing the Scooby-doo theme song playing over the air. The tension leaving his shoulders now that the cause of all his stress was no longer in the room.

"I'm sorry." He breathed, "She's been in a bad mood all day, picking fights just because."

"Hey, I grew up with her. If I'm not used to it at this point, then I need a thicker skin." Jo chuckled, despite the hurt still lingering in her eyes.

"Still, what crawled up her ass and died?" Bill scoffed, pulling Jo to his side and pressing a kiss to the side of her head. Nathan watching, his sight going green for a second. That's what he wanted, it's what he didn't know he wanted until he saw it with them, until he had to spend his days attached to Juliette. Riley was the bright spot, the good thing to come out of a shitty situation. Nathan would deal with Juliette every day for the rest of his life as long as he got to see Riley.

"I have been asking myself that question for years Billy." Nathan sighed out, laughing to himself, resigned to dealing with it later.

~~*~~

"What you said at dinner was uncalled for." Nathan puffed out, pulling off pillows from their shared bed. He may as well be sleeping alone though.

"Are you gonna attack me now too Nathanial?" Juliette scoffed, rolling her eyes at him from the bathroom vanity mirror as she got ready for bed. The slight slur to her voice telling him the wine was starting to hit her full force now.

"I'm not attacking you, simply stating you went too far. And that maybe you owe Jo an apology?" He tried, but got nothing but a single, indignant laugh in response.

"You think she's better than me huh? Is that it?!" Nathan hung his head, abandoning the task of making up the bed. He pushed back the tears of frustration and looked back at the woman he was sure he had been in love with, or at the very least liked at one point.

"When have I ever said that?" He started, voice heavy with exhaustion.

"You don't have to say it, you've always liked her better than me. Just like everyone else! I thought you were different!"

"You are 36 years old Juliette! When are you going to let this go?" He never raised his voice when they argued, never wanting Riley to hear, but Juliette seemed to want to wake the whole house which included Jo and Bill who were spending the night before heading out in the morning. Thunder rolled in the distance.

"You aren't denying it! God! I am so stupid! I never should have stayed. Never should have-" She kept muttering under her breath every seeming regret she had as she stormed into the room, yanked open the closet, grabbing a duffle bag from inside and throwing her clothes in it haphazardly. "This place is suffocating! You are suffocating with your judgy eyes and every comment about how I raise Riley-"

"You don't! That's the issue! What are you doing?" Nathan sighed as she plopped the duffle bag on the still made up side of the bed, her side.

"What does it look like. I can't stay here. Not with you or them. All of you just hate on me all the time, look at me like I'm nothing but a disappointment. I'm sorry I'm not perfect! I'm sorry I'm not golden girl Jo!" Juliette finished, throwing an arm towards the door, chest heaving as she zipped up her duffle bag and yanked open the bedroom door. Slamming it shut behind her.

Nathan listened to her as she went down the stairs, taking a breath before he was going after her, repeating over and over she is the mother of your child in his head. When they first met, it was in the middle of storm season and Jo's kid sister decided she wanted to come with her chasing that year, she was just as wild back then. Less mean, less insecure. She was all bright eyes and wide smiles, soft skin and warm affection. Until she got pregnant. That's when everything changed.

"Jules! Jules!" Nathan whisper-shouted, as he tripped down the stairs.

"What's happening?" Bill questioned, opening the door to the guest room on the first floor, in a white t-shirt and his boxers, yawning and scratching his face. Jo's voice behind him asking the same thing, sleep slurring her words though.

"I don't know William, ask your wife." Juliette spit as she past him and Nathan was still trying to get to her.

"Just go back to bed, sorry for waking you-"

"Oh shut up Nathan!"

"Was I talking to you?!" He finally snapped and Bill's mouth dropped, Juliette looked like she had been slapped.

"Well, I never..." Juliette huffed, holding a hand to her chest. Crocodile tears in her eyes, Nathan had seen them enough to know she was just trying to make him feel guilty. It was at that moment that Jo decided to get out of bed and come to the door to see what was going on.

"Bill, Jo, please, go back to bed. We're fine-"

"No! We're not fine. You know this is all your fault? Right?! If I had never gotten pregnant, my life wouldn't be like it is now. Miserable. If I had never met you or had Riley I would be happy. I wish I had never met you! I wish I had gotten rid of the baby, keeping her was a mistake-"

"Hey!-" Nathan could only see red.

"Mommy?"

Everything stopped and it felt like a lead weight had been dropped into Nathan's stomach. He turned around and looked up at the bottom of the stairs, the dirty-blonde head of his daughter, her big blue eyes, his eyes, staring up at her mother with confusion.

It was clear Juliette didn't know what to say, and Nathan was ready to swing if she said anything negative to his kid. There was a tense silence, Riley pulled her blanket and stuffed rabbit closer to her, looking unsure.

"Do you want a hug? You look sad." Riley pattered slowly up to the woman, stopping at her feet and looking up at the much taller adult who had given birth to her. Tugging on her sweatpants gently, looking for a connection. It broke Nathan's heart, knowing Riley would never get that. At least not with Juliette.

"I'm not your mommy anymore." With that Juliette turned on her heel and left. Slamming the front door behind her.

"Daddy?" Riley, with tears in her eyes looked to the man who was instantly there. Picking her up and holding her to him, her tears dampening the shoulder of his t-shirt. "Where did mommy go?"

"I don't know baby. I don't know." With one last look over his shoulder to Bill and Jo, the couple grinning sadly at the father-daughter pair. Nathan doing his best to not shake in anger. Juliette was gone for now, he had to focus on Riley. Make sure she was okay. And so, he took his daughter back up to her room and three bedtime stories, a lullaby, and a forehead kiss later she was back down and snoring softly. Hair sprawled crazily behind her, her favorite dino pj's on, blanket and rabbit next to her.

Nathan's love-filled gaze was like honey, his fingers petting her hair back from her face. When Juliette told him she was pregnant he had been terrified, convinced she was lying. He didn't take it well. He was still in his PhD program, had just been offered a huge grant to keep working on his already existing research, he couldn't see himself able to have a kid without throwing everything he had been working towards his whole life away.

Which wasn't true, he had to defer the grant for a year, finished out that year at school and then dropped out of the PhD program, it killed him, but he couldn't go to school back home in Arkansas if Juliette refused to leave Oklahoma. He may not have wanted the kid in the first place but he was raised right and was going to step up however he had to.

He wanted to be there for Juliette as she carried the baby, support her. She was miserable, she lost close to twenty pounds due to morning sickness and had to be on bed rest for months. It wasn't fun and she was horrible every minute of it. Michelle and him had to walk on eggshells every second of every day, and even then they still would set her off someway somehow. They let it slide during the pregnancy because it was understandable, she was constantly uncomfortable, couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, couldn't walk. But after Riley was born the behavior stayed, and only got worse as Riley struggled to breast feed and Juliette struggled to bond with her baby.

The connection with Nathan and Riley had been immediate though and that pissed Juliette off, it was just one more person who hadn't chosen her first. That, in her mind, didn't want her. Nathan suggested therapy but was met with a scoff and another argument about her being scared he was trying to take Riley away from her by claiming she was crazy, which was so not the case.

He could still remember when he first held Riley in the hospital, how perfect she was in every way, and still is. He hadn't ever felt the kind of love he did when he first laid eyes on his daughter, her little fingers wrapped around his pointer finger and his entire heart. She was an easy kid, at least with him. Juliette never seemed to figure out how to calm Riley down when she was fussy or upset, and would get frustrated with her quickly, yelling, berating. Nathan had walked in one time when Riley had gotten a fever and needed one of them up with her at all times, he could have sworn Juliette was about to shake the, then months old Riley, who had been wailing for what felt like hours that night.

He stopped trusting her to be alone with Riley at that moment in time. In the back of his mind he always knew Juliette wasn't going to stick around, she never did when things got hard. Fact of the matter was this had happened before, multiple times, Nathan just hoped that one day Riley wouldn't remember any of this. Or the hurtful words her mom said to her that night.

~~*~~

[kaythefloppa]

Wild Kratts - Fish Out of Water Review [Spoilers]

April is finally here, and with it, three new episodes have been released on the PBS Kids Video App ahead of their release. At the time I'm posting this, it is midnight and the one hour special "Our Blue and Green World" is yet to air on televison and streaming, so I will get to that when I get to that. Given that I have already reviewed No Name Dream and Backpack the Camel, I'll give a review to this episode as well. Spoiler warning and opinions ahead under the cut

First New York, then Hawaii, and now a goddamn University on the list of areas I would never expect these guys to film. Bros are everywhere.

As someone who is about to graduate high school, I feel IMMENSELY jealous of the college students who saw the motherfucking Kratt Brothers filming an episode on campus. I can already begin to see the floods of social media posts bragging about this on Tumblr and Twitter threads.

Ok I feel bad for being a bit salty earlier, I actually think it's really sweet how these people outside of the show can share their interests and expertise in biology and physics to help children educate. The entire live-action opening where they study the locomotion of mudskippers is honestly really sweet, and we haven't even gotten to our main animal yet!

God these are such cute animals. But beyond that, the term "fish out of water" could not be a more fitting title. They have joints like we do, can adapt to different environments, and can swim and climb like we can. This is probably my favorite live action segment because of how well structured the clips and movements are and just how fun it is seeing these little blorbs move around the place.

I should talk about how it took us half a decade to see a mudskipper on the show, and 13 years overall to get a focus episode, but so far, up to a great start and definitely worth waiting (for the most part).

Oh so is it like the Hermit Crab episode where in all of the official releases they leave out the determiner but in the actual episode it's there? This has no overall bearing on the episode but I just felt the need to point it out.

I should check off on my S7 bingo card about seeing the old inventions again because holy shit it's been almost a decade since we saw the Butterflier XT

Also can anyone identify those butterflies? I know for a FACT that those motherfuckers aren't monarchs because of their patterns (the only pattern variation in butterflies is sex-linked, and while I'm aware they live in Asia, this again, does not look like a match) but they also aren't viceroys because they lack the line around their wings. I only ask this to bring up my next point.

I thought the Butterfly Disc we saw in Season 1 was specifically programmed based off of Monarch Butterflies. But as established (until proven wrong), these are not monarch butterflies. So unless Aviva retrofitted or reprogrammed the disc to be multi-familial, as in they can touch any butterfly regardless of classification and activate accordingly (like with the Crocodile, Dragonfly, and Gecko Discs), the activation should not work. I only ask this because while it seems miniscule, Chris' decision to bring out the disc is what sets off the plot - It's what causes him to loose the discs in the butterfly swarm, so I feel like, while not a critique, it's a legitimate question as to the direct programming of the discs vs. the animals used to activate.

Man, Zach wasn't even in this episode and somehow they STILL lose their discs? (Actually, I am pleasantly surprised that they didn't take the opportunity to have this be a Zach-related episode).

You think they'd put a tracker on the collection or encode a chip the actual discs so that they wouldn't get lost this easily. This again, sounds like a nitpick, but earlier seasons set up a firewall for the Creature Power Discs and a tracking device/rocket-device on the Creature Power Suits and gloves because of how frequent these types of contingiences are, so there's really no excuse for this.

(Suck my ass PBS Kids Video App, I'm still able to get high quality snips even with your bullshit formatting!!!)

They really went all out with the "other-wordly" vibe that the mudskippers' territory gave off. Once again, we waited two years for this to be put to animation and to see come air.

I've made enough jokes around these situations in the show, so I think we'd all benefit if I just changed the subject: That front-facing mudskipper is fucking hilarious.

*Martin's voice* - Slimy Skin-breathers!

Okay, but I actually did not know that. At all. Even 10 years later, this show is still teaching me new things about animals in the most beautfully unexpected ways. This is one of the many reasons I will never give up on the show.

[Unexpected angst in bagging area - Also, with the inclusion of No Name Dream, which will air two days before this episode, that brings our Krangstt quota to #2]

Okay so I really like the set-up here, and it genuinely was a surprise seeing Jimmy angst in this episode as a subplot in a series that rarely operates on A-plots and B-plots (unless you count the villains' schemes which are usually just A^2 plots) like most shows. And as someone who legitimately was going through rough times (S7 was actually one of my few reasons to keep going), I heavily related to Jimmy. So yeah, a Jimmy angst episode? Can totally buy. What I'm not gonna buy is how they execute it with the ending, because that and the implications.... yikes...

C'mon! "Mudspitter" was right there! Right there!

Ok, here is where my main problem with this episode's subplot is. If I could boil it down to one word, it would be: Incomplete. Jimmy feeling inadequate based on an observation he made is one thing. Him immediately leaving afterwards on a whim moments after said observation is completely another and doesn't align that well.

Like, this would only work if Jimmy had attempted to be a fish "IN" water. If he tried to help Aviva and Koki with the data-research and inventing, but he failed, and they politely turned him down. Or if there was any basis as to why he suddenly disregards his piloting skills or teleporting, whether he doesn't care or doesn't think them to be enough for him to fit in. Like, he wants to be in on the action because some part of him doesn't feel like sitting around by the teleporter is enough. What I'm saying is, there is no pathos. I personally find it to be relatable, but on a narrative level, it doesn't work. I know the "character feeling left out so they leave" thing is cliche'd, but there's a reason it's a cliche, and that's because it follows a lot of writing beats that this particular episode doesn't, so on top of being cliche'd as fuck to begin with, it feels very awkward. And this is going to be apparent both here and in this episode's climax (which I also do not have many kind words for,) so I had to use my allotted time to talk about why this doesn't work.

Could... could they not call him on his Creaturepod? Could the brothers not call him on his Pod? Did he even have his Creaturepod?? Again, there are so many plot-holes in this B-story that could've easily been written around with a change of dialogue or scenery. Have Jimmy's Creaturepod be shown left lying around which makes them realize they have no way of getting him back to the teleporter in time. Jimmy would have no reason to even bring his Creaturepod on his adventure, so that just raises even more questions. Like, this isn't an active diss on the writers, but I think there should've been more proof-reading of the script since this is a massive oversight.

I think now is the time for me to bring up this question I've had for years now; How exactly does the teleporter work? In several episodes, we've seen that there is a coordinate code in the teleporter that allows it to be sent to the target. Koki's "the communication queen" as Aviva puts it, so she'd likely be able to triangulate the brothers' location. So I'm not sure why the show presents this as a struggle for Koki. This isn't the only example, so I won't hold it against the episode, (they have this be the case specifically to emphasize the point that they need Jimmy, which I can forgive) but it's another piece of lore that I should probably theorize about lmao.

Also

YOU HAVE LITERALLY TELPORTED THE CREATURE POWER DISCS FOUR TIMES.

TWO OF THOSE TIMES BEING IN A ROW.

AND ONE OF THEM WAS FOUR EPISODES AGO IN THIS EXACT SAME SEASON.

This whole episode spent the past five minutes making its main characters look incredibly idiotic for the sake of its B plot.

Once again, this episode's spitting facts that I didn't even know.

This is actually a neat seguay, having the brothers figure out the abilities of the mudskippers while exercising their own cool abilities. It feels really natural, and again, is an inventive way to show off the locomotive abilities of the mudskipper.

I feel like this falls very well between "accurate enough to be admirable" and "uncanny." I can (maybe on my deathbed) get used to this suit's design (though I'm partly glad Chris doesn't activate it because spoilers, he doesn't).

I've given this subplot a lot of flack, but credit where it's due, even with its misses, it does hit with the emotional beats.

Very conflicted on this:

On one hand, Jimmy actually taking the initiative to miniaturize is pretty ballsy. The show, despite not being serialized, does develop its characters in a way that you can sense a clear difference of them when you compare the modern seasons to the earlier ones. And this can be seen as a positive development for Jimmy, since it's his "Creature Adventure."

On the other hand.... back to what I was saying about consistency. Why did Jimmy bring the miniaturizer?? What was his prompting?? Was he planning on shrinking himself down the whole time? Like, he left his friends for god knows how much time and is now out of nowhere shrinking himself down to fish size because he feels inadequate? Uhm, Jimmy, ever heard the idea of therapy?

Also, again, very weird presentation of the episode. They don't at all put any attention to Jimmy's coms and whether or not he has them, (which would easily solve a bigger issue of why he's not contacted), yet they have him carry the Miniaturizer with him. Now, the latter is plot-relevant, but so could've been something about the Creaturepod.

This [from what I interpret] gets Jimmy out of his slump, making his "scientific discovery." Not realizing that his job of piloting and teleporting are equally important. Again, this is structured poorly. I like what they were going for, but it shouldn't have been the only thing that altered the trajectory of this subplot. Again, he can teleport discs to the brothers and pilot and while those are mentioned later on, it's not something he comes to himself in an "oh shit" moment. So this just feels unearned and weird. I really hate how harsh I am, since it's a Jimmy centric episode and it was the #1 requested thing on all the chat-boards during the hiatus, but this is one of those things where it has to be done right if at all. This isn't done right, and the fact that it takes up 50% of the episode just... ugh.

You can't tell it through screenshots but with the way Aviva says it and the scene cutting to her and Koki laughing at it, I'm 98% inclined that this was a specific innuendo, and ngl, I kinda laughed too.

Oh look, it's Kenge's cousin! [For you Lion Guard fans that also recognize Wild Kratts] - [I was inclined to make a reference to Jessie, but that felt in bad taste considering y'know]

Ok, but that has to be an Asian water monitor. Correct me if I'm wrong. What I'm definitely not wrong about is that their bites contain venom; To a human it's not lethal, however to small prey, including mudskippers, or anything around that size, it's lights out. So yeah, Chris and Martin are fucked.

Ok this line is absolutely badass.

Also, grey?? Grey?? I thought Jimmy's signature color was orange/yellow? Or red with the implication of the tail episode? Great, now there's another color that'll be in the debates for his future Creature Power Suit.

Once again, this arc feels weirdly put together. This notion comes up specifically at the climax when it should come up beforehand as Jimmy realizes his worth. Because otherwise, it gives the implication that he knew this all along and yet still felt like a fish out of water, which doesn't mesh together properly (it could, if the episode actually tried to do so which it didn't).

The episode, Sea Otter Swim, does this plot so much better. We see Jimmy's doubts, and we see how he overcomes said doubts in a way that is presented clear to the audience, and the climax where he actually realizes what he's capable of feels earned. This is not earned. So even though I am rooting for him to win, this whole thing just feels messy.

So is nobody gonna ask why Jimmy left his post? Is Jimmy not gonna tell everyone why he left, or at the very least ask why nobody bothered to call for him? Is nobody going to at least let Jimmy know that he can't just... abandon his post without warning because of the fact that they need him? Is Jimmy not going to come to that conclusion himself? Is anything in this episode gonna be earned??

This entire ending feels like an ass-pull: First off, Jimmy and the brothers had enough time to head back to the miniaturizer and then the Tortuga, and in none of that time, did Jimmy ever give them the Power Discs? Why? Yes, it was for the sake of the fake-out defeat/joke, but was there any reason why Jimmy just kept the thing hidden waiting to give it to the brothers?

The entire emotional climax to this episode is basically everyone putting Jimmy on a pedestal. It's unsatisfying because there wasn't any acknowledgement or follow up to Jimmy's conflict at the beginning, nor is the lesson learned in the right way, and the conclusion just overreacts by hyping up Jimmy instead of just having a reasonable "We're a team!" thing, or through any self-actualization of his good qualities that Koki pointed out. None of it, friggin' none of this is earned! Now it comes across as Jimmy being uncharacterstically boastful and cocky and the others just kissing his arse. That's probably not the intent but it was the result.

That is actually like, so fucking cool. I have massive respect for all of these people, like legitimately (also, considerning that's the exact opposite of what Zach does on an ethics scale, I find that really interesting). But beyond that, I think this episode has the best live action segments ever, they are so ingenuitive. I could easily see someone at my high school showing a clip of this episode in robotics' or biology class.

CONCLUSION:

PROS:

The live action segments.

The info dumps about the mudskippers.

The Kratt Brother's adventure with the mudskippers.

The animation

The background music (a lot of which is recycled from earlier seasons)

CONS:

Everything else (specifically the B plot). I feel like the writers wanted to give Jimmy his own storyline, either out of interest or seeing how popular the character was in chat-boards, but they didn't know how to do it so they just went through the motions without really connecting anything at all, so it's a lot harder relating to the exact conflicts in some cases, and you feel disatisfied by the cimax. It reminds me of what they did with Vitani in the Lion Guard finale, a case of giving this one character the spotlight, but hitting all of the wrong marks that does the character and the audience a disservice and leaves a bitter taste in the viewer's mouth by the end credits.

This is the first episode this season that has made me cringe, primarily off of its premise, not just a particular scene, a dated pop culture reference, or a weird-looking Power Suit. It is the first to make me cringe because of its story, which again, the B-plot takes up 50% of the episode, so it's constantly in your face. It's definitely not bad, not hateable bad, and it's far too early in the season to call it the worst, and there are definitely worse episodes out there, ones that have aired and ones that probably will inevitably air, but I can safely say, thus far, it's the one Wild Kratts episode that I enjoy, but only to an extent. The live action segments were by far the only thing that I got extremely engaged in, but other than that, and the other pros, it's not that good.

Final Ranking: 6/10: Above Average, but Needed Improvement.

[nerdypixel]

I will do all of these eventually, I just need to start with one.

More information under the cut

Gunpowder Tim vs. The Moonkaiser project: I want to illustrate specific parts of this song and make it into a "short" comic. (knowing myself this will be anything but short) It will take a lot of time and patience on my end, but I think it could be cool and I can learn a bunch about lighting.

Tma Fanart: I have a list that is continuously expanding and growing and I keep adding ideas. My sketchbook is already more than half full and I started it in October. I want to finish this until April and move on to the next thing/sketchbook.

Hello from the hallowoods is a podcast that is like a warm blanket to me, but I keep getting lost with the huge amount of characters so drawing the main ones might be a good idea to keep track of everything. Also everyone is queer and I love that. Quite an opportunity to get better at drawing old people.

My own comic: to be completely honest... I'm having two ideas. One is about a witch (cliché I know, but she is really cool, fighting for nature against industrialization and greed) there is basically a war happening (now that I think about it, it's a bit like Princess Mononoke) and the other one is about a badass warrior princess with dinosaurs and Steampunk elements and floating islands (that will be a headache to draw).

Elias, Peter and Simon on weed are a fun idea someone on a Discord server gave me. It's a self contained little story that hopefully only takes a few panels to tell.

The Lord of the Rings painting I want to do for my brother is the fight Gandalf against the Balrog. I want to really make it cool with perspective and smoke and colours and... I probably should do that first, because it was supposed to be his Christmas gift, but I have to paint that traditionally and I suck at that... Drawing is fine, but painting... Well, I have to try.

[agirlwholovesrockstars]

she's my collar

☆AGATHA'S MASTERLIST☆

summary : you and your aunt moved in to Hawkins, Indiana, you got your last year of senior high and got a job at Family Video, you finally made friends and this place feels like home until you met Eddie, you never know what love feels like unbeknownst to you he is not truly human what you thought he is

word count : the is the most longest one part fic that I ever written I'm sorry 😭

warnings : (18+) Vampire!Eddie Munson x FEM! reader, Eddie & reader are virgins, language, use of (y/n) losing a loved one, Eddie is (19), reader is (18), protected sex, Eddie being the most adorable and caring vampire ever, natural disaster (earthquake), reader is oblivious to Eddie's true nature, I added the KAS THEORY a little bit in this, idk if this is considered a spoiler but reader will sacrifice her mortality 👀

what to expect : angst, fluff, eventual smut, but I promise this has a good ending

note to reader : I've been wanting to write a fic about Eddie being a vampire and I hope you'll enjoy this! 🫶🏻

author note : I love Gorillaz so much, they're like my favorite band ever, if you haven't listen to this song yet and yes this is where I got the idea hahaha you should listen to it first! 👇🏻

It's April 16 1988

You and your Aunt Katherine moved to another town again called Hawkins, Indiana

Ever since in your early teens, you got used to it, moved here and there

Your aunt took care for you, when your parents both passed at a very young age of 7

She's the only one you've ever had in your life and you couldn't be more grateful

She did the best that she can to give you what you needed, she treated you well, she thought you the how to deal things with life

You loved her very dearly, it just saddens you to move on again to another town- she wants to have a partner again in her life, on every slight inconveniences the next thing you know is packing up all of your stuff and leave immediately

All the memory of Uncle Charlie is a bit hazy and you couldn't quite remember everything of it but you know, he is an amazing husband whenever your Aunt talks about him, you can see the way her eyes glow

You struggle to adjust into the new environment and make new friends, Perhaps?.... as if you ever made one

But this time, you wanted to stay for real this time, you wanna settle down and have a real life

Thankfully, is the last year of your senior high school and you're just going to need a job after you graduated

Even though your aunt insist not to take any jobs she wants you to go in college as soon after you graduated

But you really wanted to have a job not because of your own needs but you also wanted to help out your aunt

She sadly smiles at you and she sighs in defeat and she saids "Alright, we will look for a perfect job for you"

While your aunt is asking for inquires at a local diner in front of the Family Video

You eye out the store and you don't understand why the sudden pulling inside of you telling you that's the place that you want to work

You cleared your throat "Can I check that out, if you don't mind?"

Your aunt looked around "Yeah, sure, my dear but be back here? alright?"

"Okay" You nod

You crossed down the road and your eyes roam around the small building

You loved movies, you always loved watching movies

You opened the door and the bell chimes, a signal, that a customer enter the premises

"Hi! Welcome to Family Video!" A short dusty blonde hair girl- greeted you with a smile on her face

You like the enthusiastic tone coming out of her voice "uh- thank you" you shrug shyly

You didn't noticed the man coming in a load of big boxes on the side and you bumped to each other and the box fall back down on the ground scattering all of the VHS tapes on the floor

He grunts and sighs warily not until he looked up at you "Oh- I'm sorry I didn't see you there"

"It's my fault, let me help you pick up those"

Before he can protest, he already saw you piling all of the VHS all at once

"My guess this is for the horror section, right?" You held up one "Rosemary's Baby" VHS

"Yes" he responds feeling bad while he watches you picking all of the tapes and placing all of them one by one on the shelf

"Look, you don't have to do this" he says while grabbing all of the VHS at once putting them on the front desk he even doesn't bother to organized them all he just goes straight back to you

"Hey, it's okay, don't sweat it" You say before you crouch down to put the last horror VHS in place

"Actually, I think I might get a job around here" you stand up straight and look at him

He's very attractive, his hazel eyes are pretty and the hair is perfectly styled

He must've been very popular at his school where he studied

"Oh, you are?"

"Yeah"

"I think we have one more available slot for you- he pauses "Shoot- I'm sorry, My name is Steve, Steve Harrington"

He hold out his hand for you and you shake them "it's Y/N"

"Steve, have you-"

You looked around and it's the girl who greeted you earlier

She smirked and you looked back at Steve in confusion

He shakes his head at her "Before you go think of something else, I'm almost finished to organize everything that is delivered right now"

"Ooh, really?" She answers sarcastically

"It's because we have a new assistant now!"

"Wait-woah- Does that mean I'm hired?"

"Yes!" Steve replies fast and you can hear the excitement in his tone

She rolled her eyes at him "Anyways, I'm Robin, Robin Buckley" she reached out for hand and she shakes it aggressively

"You better get used to her over the top energy" Steve chuckles

You giggled "Okay, it's nice to meet you, Robin, I'm Y/N"

"Hey, Robin could you get the papers to sign her up?"

She annoyingly smiles at Steve and goes back to the office

"That was fast?" You furrow your brows in confusion

"What do you mean?"

"That I got the job?" You raise your eyebrow at him

"Ah"

He goes back to the desk organizing every VHS tape in order on the shelf

Not looking at you he replies "It's because you knew the film that you're holding earlier"

"Huh? Is that it?"

"Uh yeah- that's what we needed in here, top 1 most important thing is that you must know or like familiar with films and everything" he says while opening a second box putting out the other new delivered VHS

"Oh"

"and you even place them not just in the horror section" he gestures the last phrase with quotation marks "you also placed them by year!" he breathlessly laughs

"What?"

He motions you to look back at the horror section

"Oh, yeah right" you chuckled

He crouch down to look at it and shaking his head "I can't believe that you know all about this stuff!" he exclaims

"What stuff" Robin says without looking at you both while she's double checking the paper before she gives it to you

"This girl right here" he points to you "is very cultured"

"Say what now?" Robin grins at you as she crouch down next to Steve

She gasps and looks right back at you "You literally organized all of these by year?"

You nod at her and smile

"Wow"

"Exactly"

"Dracula (1931), Frankenstein (1931)-" Robin cups her face in awe as she reads all the labels again

"Psycho (1960) to Rosemary's Baby (1968)"

"I just place them on the shelf but not like this" Steve is still unbelievable of what you just did

"She freaking place them not just by year but also by decade!"

You watch them as they lose their minds and you can't supress the smile growing widely because you've never had like this before

Maybe.... You finally made friends

Robin stands up straight she walks towards to you "Like how could you know all about this?"

You shrugged "I just love movies that's all"

Steve straighten up as well "Did you go to film class or something?"

"I guess you could say that" you snorted while you put your hands on your pocket

"Wait? Are you in college?" Robin says

"Not yet, I'm going to finish my last year of senior first but yeah Steve's right that's what I want to pursue someday"

Robin nods while Steve listens continuing to put all of the VHS at place

"I-I was supposed to go to college after I graduated that's what my aunt really wanted but I just- you paused

"I want to have a job and uh- I wanna experience it while saving up some money for college" you added

"Well, you found the perfect place" Steve smiles

"Yeah, it's gonna be fun!" Robin agrees

You look in their eyes and you can tell they're very genuine and you smile at them

You heard the car from outside beeping and it's your aunt calling out from you

"Oh, that's my aunt, I- uh I'm gonna go" you say while you're rushing out towards the exit

Steve follows you while your hand rest on the door handle "Before you go, can you start tomorrow? We open at 9am?"

"Yes, I can"

"Good"

"What am I going to wear by the way?"

"You can wear anything you want- we don't have spare uniform around here yet" Robin says while she carries the 2 boxes bringing it outside

"Oh okay, I'll see you guys tomorrow then!"

"Sure thing!" Robin smiles at you

"Bye, Take care" Steve says while waving to you

You look at them for the last time and you push the door forward

"She's really cute and pretty!" Robin says with a eat shiting-grin on her face

Robin feels Steve's eyes rolling "I like her but, very funny, Robs" as he glares at her

She laughs "ooh I wonder what else she likes, maybe she loves rock music" she says as she taps her finger at her chin while thinking deeply

"What makes you say that?"

"I saw her leather bracelet and she wears like black & white colored outfits"

"Just because someone is wearing one doesn't mean they listen to rock music, Robin"

"But what if, she is!"

Steve chuckles "Only way to found out tomorrow"

6:30am in the morning, you woke up

You stretch out your body before getting out of the bed and move the curtains on the side of the window

You're never a morning person as a kid but now you're growing more to like it

You still haven't done unpacking everything yet since you're exhausted yesterday just recently moving in the tow

You sigh as you looked over the baggages in your room instead you showered to freshen up and start rummaging through your luggage

you grab the black bra top, black cardigan and khaki pants

Your aunt made your favorite chicken noodle soup and you smile to yourself as you walk across the kitchen, smelling the aroma more

"Goodmorning, pumpkin" she greets

"Morning!" you smile

Your aunt caught your keen voice as she squints her eyes at you but a smile grows on her lips before she continues to what she was doing

You want to help out your aunt for cooking but she always insists that you sat down on the table

she places the bowl in front of you "What's with you so smiley today?"

"I'm just looking forward for the job that I got yesterday"

"Wait, what- really?" she stopped while holding the serving spoon

"Yeah"

"At the Family Video?"

"Yes!"

"And you're excited about that?"

You smile even wider you can't help but wonder why "Yes I do! I think I made friends as well!"

"You did?"

"Yes!"

"What are their names?"

"Steve Harrington and Robin Buckley"

Your aunt can see the lively vibe into your eyes and she hopes that you will never lose it

She smiles down at you as she fills up your bowl with chicken noodle soup

You sigh at the comfortness around the area and you've never felt this before ever since.... well.... you moved in a lot

You felt happy at those times before but not like this, this is different

Maybe, just maybe..... This is the place that you want to stay

"I'm happy for you, love, but if things go wrong-

"I will always be here whenever you need me" you cut her off by finishing her sentence that she always reminds you

She chuckles as she places a glass of red iced tea

"Eat up, we got a big day ahead of us"

Your aunt drop you off at the Family Video, she decides to take the diner instead, she works as a waitress in there

Steve & Robin are already inside opening all of the windows inside

They seem to focus on what they're doing that they didn't even noticed that you arrived on time

You cleared your throat and they raise their heads in unison

You shyly wave at them

Robin smiles "Perfect timing!"

"Hey there!" Steve greets you

You sheepishly nod at him

Robin walks towards to you and grab your hand as she pull over the desk and she reveals your uniform and your name tag

You gasped as you look over to your uniform

Other people might found this funny because of your reaction looked like you just won the lottery

But this is very new to you and it's a great experience to let yourself feel it, enjoy it and embrace it

"W-Wow, I'm official now?"

"You sure are!" Robin says as she watches you unfold your uniform and couldn't help but smile even more

"You can wear it now, if you want to" Steve says

"Are you kidding? I've been dying to have one of these!"

Steve chuckles and shakes his head at you

"You can go ahead and change in the restroom is just around the corner" Robin says as she directs you to where the bathroom is

"Okay, be right back!" You say as you pick up your stuff and headed towards the restroom

"Isn't she the most lovely human being ever!" Robin admires your kind personality

"I gotta admit, I do" Steve shrugs as he flips the sign on the glass door that says "OPEN"

"We had a bet right?"

"What?"

"A bet that we did, last night"

"Oh- that"

"And I just have the perfect person to talk about it" Robin looks over to Steve shoulder and she grins

Someone enters the store with heavy boots on

Steve already knows who is the person behind him and he sighs in exhaustion

He turns around and he says "Dude, what the hell are you doing in here?"

He's wearing Ray-Bans black sunglasses

"I'll be quick, man, don't worry"

"I'll be quick" Steve mocks him making the man rolls his eyes even though his wearing sunglasses, Steve can see it

"You know it's dangerous for you to go outside, in broad daylight!" Steve exclaims

He sighs "yeah, man, I know, goddamn it just be chill, Harrington" he walked over the Mystery/Thriller section as he halts his tracks

His sensing something..... else

"Don't tell me you're going outside like this often" Steve says sternly

Robin ignoring Steve "Uh- I'm going to say something about-"

The man just hushes them both

They both went silent and Steve looked over to Robin and she just shrugs

He can smell you, he can even hear the beat of your heart

He takes a deep breath and he narrows his piercing red glowing eyes to his friends

But before they can say anything, he heard the restroom door open as he swiftly snaps his head looking at you

you unbeknownst to what's going around at the store and the strange man that came in

You're wearing a walkman and you're listening to "Deep Purple - Child In Time" with your head down and you swing your bag over your shoulder fixing your uniform more properly

He removed his sunglasses with his lips apart

The man could've sworn to himself that he is dead, he felt alive again just seeing your presence, even though his heart isn't the same anymore since.... the disaster happened

It's been 2 years and yet here you are, he thought he would've never feel anything that is human but now.... he is feeling something again and that intrigues him

You feel eyes on you

Your raise your head and you have locked eyes at the peculiar man standing not too far from you

He can feel and read your mind, emotions towards him, you're curious and somehow.... intimidated?

That's what he is afraid of.... but that changes when you started walking towards him with a smile on your face

You remove your walkman headset and pause the cassette

Steve and Robin shared a knowing look with each other as they smirk behind the man

"Oh, hello, I'm Y/N" you offer your hand to shake hands with him

You asking him? to shake hands with you?

He blinked and swallowed he becomes nervous as he couldn't said a word

You furrow your brows while you reach out for his hand and he shakes it "and you are?"

"I-I'm Edward Munson- b-but you can call me, Eddie" he stutters and he winces at the awkward answer but you find it cute

The one thing that you noticed, it's not even winter yet but his hand feels.... cold... not that it's weird is just it's summer but you don't pay attention to it...maybe....it's because he's nervous

"Hi, Eddie is a pleasure to meet you, I just recently moved here."

"You do?"

"Yeah, just yesterday"

He looked back at his friends raising his eyebrows

"And that what I've been meaning to tell you" Robin sighs

"She's on her first day of the job!" Steve says while putting his hands over his waist

"Are you picking up a movie?" You asked

"Uh- yeah- I was"

You nod "What kind?"

He got confused by your question and you chuckled "What I mean what kind of movie genre"

"Oh, I get it" he admires your features carefully your eyes, lips, smile, nose, even your voice.... is making him melt

You move yourself beside him and that shocks him, he's never been close to a human girl in his life.... except for his friends though

"You're looking for a Mystery/Thriller film?"

"Yeah, I am"

You look over the VHS section, you found that catches your eye but before you put it out from the shelf, you ask him first

"Are you looking for something that is uh- spooky?"

He tears his eyes away from you while you lean down bending beside him

You didn't even noticed that he is watching you, my god- you're so beautiful- it hurts

He clears his throat "I-I'm kinda into some kind of action"

Steve scrunches up his brows "Since when?"

Robin elbows him with Steve saying "OW!"

"Don't mess up with the moment" she whispers

You picked it up and give it to him

He take it out your grasps and he reads the title "Die Hard"

"You gotta love it" you told him

He smiles to you "Okay"

Robin presses her lips together as she can't control her excitement

"Say- uh- Eddie- I think Y/N is also into rock music" Robin says as she throw her arm around your shoulder with a grin

"How- did you?-" you say as you turn your head on Robin

"You are?"

"Oh- yeah I am"

"What kind?" he echoes the question that you asked him earlier

"Heavy metal, speed metal, glam rock, hard rock, blues, psychedelic rock and so much more" you say as you motion your hands for far more wide

Eddie's eyes almost bulge out of his head "Really? No way!" he jumps out of exhilaration

"Yes, I do!"

You mirrored his enthusiasm as you jump at the same time- you didn't even realized you both holding each other's hands

Robin face turn into such a satisfaction as she turn into Steve mouthing to him "Pay me"

Steve rolls his eyes at her with a smile as he digs out of his pocket a dollar and gives it to Robin

You share each other's interests as you both looked down

you rip your hands from him immediately while smiling sheepishly at him

Eddie scratches the back of his neck

"Are you going to pay for that, Munson?" Steve asks

"Right" he responds as he holds up the VHS you gave to him

Before he can leave the store he turn around and say "Can we hang out sometime?" he shyly asks

"Sure, Eddie, I would love to"

"Oh, okay good, what day are you available?"

"I could hang out with you tomorrow if you want"

"T-That's perfect!" his voice raises a bit much that gives two of his friends shared giggles and he shakes his head at the sight of them

You laugh "See ya, tomorrow, Eddie"

"You too, sweet thing" he gives you a smile before he exits

and that's where all it began....

Everytime you bond with each other, you two became close, literally inseparable

You even met his amazing friends that you very liked in the first place that you met them

Dustin, Max, Lucas, El, Mike, Nancy, Will, Jonathan, Chief Hopper (but he prefers to be called Jim) Joyce, Murray, Karen, Ted, Enzo

You notice something again in their eyes, you can't even read it what it means but you never really mind it about anyways

The first thought comes to your mind, maybe.... they're observing you- they feel like they should get to know you first before trusting you

Are they hiding something from you? or maybe they're just being careful or it's just their instinct

But at the same time it doesn't add up, if they won't trust you they shouldn't be inviting you to hang out during weekends or inviting you and your aunt on dinner

You have done it, countless amount of times already.... and it's overwhelming to you because.... this never happen to you before

One time though, you made garlic buttered shrimp that Eddie almost runaway at the smell of it, you thought he didn't like the food and you can see he is scared.... like you can't even explain it- it looks like you're going to hate him?

Eddie on the other hand can read your mind and he wishes if anything happens, if ever you found out about him, he hopes that you will never change towards him

"Oh, are you allergic to seafood?"

"U-uh- yeah I am" he quietly sighs of relief

You gasped "My deepest apologies, I am so sorry I didn't mean any harm" you say as you moved away the food from him

You met Eddie's uncle, Wayne, that's your first impression again

You got intimidated, but that got off as well as soon as he acts so friendly to you

He has the exact same qualities with his nephew

He is so sweet and kind like Eddie

Sometimes you caught them looking at each other with a look that again.... you couldn't understand

There's also no mirrors in their trailer

There's mirrors in some of his friend's house but all of them are covered with a fabric

You find it odd but you can't stop yourself from being curious though

Also....

One night, you came home late from work since you insist to take the night shift from Robin- you couldn't quite understand the reason why the sudden she has to leave

It's about a "Code Red?"

Steve didn't want to leave you behind but you heard Dustin's voice coming out from the walkie-talkie shouting

"Bring Steve with you, y-you guys better come in here right now! It's urgent!"

Judging by the tone of his voice, it is very serious and you hate yourself for thinking this is kind of a sick joke but it really is not

You drag your brows together but you don't wanna pry and it's really none of your business but you wanted to know what's going on though

Robin almost dragging Steve out of the store

He really didn't wanna go and you can't understand why, the more you try to convince Steve that you'll be okay and you can see in his eyes that it's highly unlikely that you'll be fine,

alone.

It's closer to 12:00am, you packed up your stuff and you make sure all of doors from the back door and the office are locked and you switch off the lights and close the store

The cold wind made you shudder a little

Your aunt take the bus ride home she leaves you with the car, while on your way to it- you didn't know that there's a man holding out a knife to harm you

Before he can attack you, there's a wind swoosh behind your back, you turn around and you notice there's nothing in there- you roam your eyes everywhere

There's no one

You felt nervous and you grip on your car keys as you quickly unlock the door

There's 'clang' of a trashcan that flew into the air and that made you shrieked and you drop your keys on the ground

You take a deep breath and you shout

"Whoever you are! Show yourself!"

Eddie can feel your fear and he feels bad he's the one that caused it but he doesn't want anyone to hurt you, he won't let anyone to do that to you

His eyes are red, his hands are bloody, and his fangs were out.... good thing that he can go back to normal after a while to calm down

When no one respond, you huffed and shake your head, you pick up the keys on the ground

The moment you look back again, you screamed "AHH" you put your hand over your chest and you're heavily breathing

It's Eddie fucking appeared out of nowhere in front of you and you didn't even heard him coming

"You fucking scared me half to life! Eddie! What the hell?!?"

You clasps his hands together saying "I'm sorry" repeatedly

You wave dismissively at him and he says "A-are you good?"

You laugh in disbelief- you scratch your forehead "What are you doing in here anyways?"

Oh shit

He needs a valid reason

"Uh- Steve asked me to guard on you"

"Guard on me?" You raise your eyebrows while you squint your eyes on him

"Y-yeah since, it's late"

before you can reply, Dustin runs around you and he put his hands over his knees as he tries to catch up his breath

Steve leans over to your car with a ragged breathing

Robin puts her hand over her chest as she gives a small wave

"Oh- good, you're okay" Dustin hugs you and you hugged back looking at Eddie in confusion

He pulled out a forced smile as he doesn't know what to say

Hopper's car arrived and he came out of the vehicle and he gives a glare to Eddie

Eddie gulped and put his head down

"There's a suspect that runs into this area that's why we came as fast as we could" Hopper explained

You nod and that lessens your suspicions but- you want answers

You're still confused by the whole situation going on but they watched you as they saw you're inside of the car and drove away

Eddie watches you closely as he can read your thoughts and he feels so guilty for not telling you the truth about....

Himself

"What have we told you?" Hopper says sternly

"I know-"

"Listen, kid, you know I like you alright?" Hopper says

He just nods

"I can't help but feel infuriated by your stubbornness"

"Look- I just- wanna help! I caught the bad guy! didn't I?!?" He looks over to Dustin, Steve and Robin

The three of them give unsure looks

"Oh, come on, you guys"

"Yeah, you caught the bad guy but what about you?" Steve says

"I agree with Steve" Dustin can't even look at Eddie in the eyes as he can remembers how he almost lost him before

"What if, someone saw you? Do you think they won't think twice of killing you instantly?" Robin added

"We know that you wanted to help but we can't risk anyone by finding out that you're- Eddie cuts Hopper off before finishing his sentence

"A what?!? A fucking vampire?!?" Eddie exclaims

He lets out a exasperated sigh "I know guys are concerned about me and I promise this is the last time that I will violated what we talked about" he starts

"If there's a bad situation, I will never do anything without your permission"

Hopper, Steve, Dustin, Robin glance at each other as they all know no matter what they do- Eddie will always be there to save someone from harm

"He-" his angry tears welled up behind his eyes

Hopper blinks at his vulnerability, He knows that he is strong but he truly does care for his loved ones

But this is the first time that they saw him like this..... again.... after the incident....

"He almost killed her, Hopper"

"If- if I wasn't there on time, he would've killed her"

"I would've have lost her" he sniffled

Steve gives Eddie a sympathetic smile, Robin softly gasps at his subtle confession about his true feelings to you and Dustin widen his eyes

"I'm sorry, if I was on a rush for making risky decisions again" he says plainly as he flew off

All of them watch him as he flies away

Dustin smiles sadly "What happens if she finds out?" He says as he still looking up in the sky

"What?" Steve asked

"What if she finds out the truth about him?"

"Oh" Steve can't help but feel so sorry for Eddie, he knows that he never loved someone in his life ever since, he never knew this could happen

"What should we do if ever that might happen?" Robin says as she presses her lips together

"She won't" Hopper says while he's walking towards to this car

"She won't" what? Dustin raises his eyebrows as he waits for Hopper to continue

"She won't be scared of him"

"What makes you say that?" Steve added

"Because they've been together a lot, it's over a year since they moved here and Y/N told us that they frequently leave even though she doesn't tell it to me, I feel like she wants to stay here because of him.... and that says a lot." Hopper says as he goes inside of his car and turns on the engine

"You know what, he's right" Robin says

Steve and Dustin looked at her

"She wouldn't be with us, if she doesn't trust us."

"Well, I just hope she won't change after anything if she finds out" Steve sighs

"I believe in Y/N too" Dustin while he crosses his arms

"Remember the time when Y/N defended Eddie from those douchebags at The Hideout?"

Steve chuckles and Robin "Oh yeah, she got heated when they're calling him "monster" and a "freak"- she literally splashes him with a beer and my god she punches the guy after he tries to hurt her"

Eddie rambles the whole situation over and over to Dustin, from what his dear old friend doesn't know even he is just a kid, he can see his eyes shine whenever he talks about you

Dustin is very happy for him, he hasn't seen his friend this joyful ever since

"Just be there for her, if ever, okay?" Hopper says

All of them nod at him, they watch as he droves away

Eddie on the other hand

Thoughts going wildly on his mind while he's flying around the town

He doesn't know what to do, is it a right decision to tell you or to keep it a secret?

but he knows deep down, if he still keeps this as a secret, you would be furious that it makes him look like he doesn't trust you

He angrily shouts as he lands on a forest

He screams "Why?!"

"I know this would've happen, but I never thought it will really happen" he's heavily breathing as he continues to shout

"Why do I have to suffer like this?!" He says as he owns tears getting choked up in his throat

"I really wanted to stay with my friends but right now?!?" He laughs incredulously "I would rather die than seeing my love getting afraid because of me!"

Memories flashes before his eyes as he remembers the one who gave this to him

"You'll live"

Eddie is gasping for air but he feels different

He woken up he is still laying in the upside down

He sits up, the demobats that tear off half of his skin and limbs are all healed

"W-What have you done to me?" He says as he backs away from him

"Shh" he shushes "Don't be frightened"

"I need you to work for me"

"What?"

"I gave you life and powers"

Eddie runs his tongue over his teeth and he shouts "No" his fuelling anger is becoming tears in his eyes

"You can't do this to me!"

"You're my slave, I need you to do something for me"

"I won't work for you!"

He slams him behind the trailer as he threatens him and choking him in the process

"You wanted to graduate is that it?"

"Y-yes, I do"

"Then follow me what I need you to do"

In fact he did follow him, but he had other plans

Everyone was shocked that he is still alive, he showed up first to Dustin, he thought he saw a ghost the first time he saw him again

"I knew it! You're alive!" He hugs Eddie with happy tears

"It's really good to see you, bud" he says as he rubs his back

"But- how did you manage to-" Dustin pulls away but he got cut off by Eddie saying

"I will explain to you everything, we have a problem"

"Copy that" Dustin says as he walks over to grab his walkie-talkie saying "Code Red"

To be completely honest everyone felt weird when they saw Eddie alive and well as if he wasn't got eaten off by demobats

Eddie can understand why and that he is truly himself, just undead that's all

"Steve, Robin, Jonathan and I, will take cover for you" Nancy says

"El and Eddie will corner Vecna to finish this once for all" Mike tightens the grip on El's hand as she flashes out a small smile

"We will be at the gates and guard on it if ever nasty monsters will get out" Erica says as she nods over to Lucas and Max

"Me and Argyle will warn Hopper and Enzo to the townspeople to stay alert and be ready" Will added

Eddie sighs "Do you think this could work?"

"It has to- and I believe you can beat his ass off" Dustin reassures Eddie

The plan is going on so nicely, everything is coming to an order

El uses her telekinetic powers to hold off Vecna and while Eddie pins him down on the ground

"Your time is running out" Eddie grunts

"You're making a big mistake"

"Am I?"

Vecna tries to fight back but El groans and screams harder as she pushes him back down and Eddie stabs him with a sword and punches him

That caused a lot pain to him "Traitor" he says while wincing at the wound

"If you kill me, you won't be able to go back to normal"

El glances over to Eddie and he looks back at her

He gave her a small nod and mouthing to her "it's okay"

"Someday, you'll see, if someone tries to love you, they won't love you back because you're a monster"

Eddie clenches his jaw as he deepens the wound

"They won't accept you, everywhere you go- they'll hate you"

"A freak but also a monster?" He laughs darkly

"Don't listen to him, Eddie!" El yells as she uses both of her hands to hold him back down

"Now, don't you worry, supergirl, I am not" he says sternly to Vecna

His eyes widen as he watches him raises the sword to chop his head off

"I would rather live like this than to knowing that you're still alive killing innocent people" he says in his last blow of his sword

Both of them shout in anger and exhaustion

They both fell back down and the upside down is now crumbling

Eddie, El, Steve, Robin, Nancy, and Jonathan running for their lives as they try to leave the upside down

Erica, Lucas and Max watches the gates closed on its own and it faded like it wasn't ever existed

The cracks are all gone and the wind and the red glow in the area is nowhere to be seen

"He made it" Enzo chuckled

"The kid got guts" Hopper smiled as he closes his eyes finally at peace for this town

Mike speaks over the walkie-talkie asking "Hey, guys? I see the town is going back to normal is everything alright?" Dustin can't reply as he's watching the last gate where Eddie is

He kept saying "Come on guys, Eddie, come on, man"

The 6 of them jump on the ground back into the real world as the watch the last gate finally closed and goes back to where it was before

Dustin sighs of relief "Is everyone okay?"

"Yeah, we're okay" Steve says as he looks over to his friends

Eddie is the only one who is silent as everyone is catching up their breath

He is disappointed of what he has become for all eternity but also the same time, he is glad, that the war is finally over

"Are you good?" Jonathan asks Nancy as she gives him a nod

"Eddie?" Robin asks

El glances over to Eddie and he looks at her giving him a hopeful smile

He finally turns around "I am stuck like this, you guys, forever" he scoffed while shaking his head

Everyone gave him a sympathetic smile

"You're a hero, Eddie and nothing ever changes that" El says as she puts over her hand in his shoulder

"Thank you" he says softly

"You'll be okay and we will always here for you, Eddie" Dustin says

"Yeah, man" Steve agrees

"It never felt any different ever since you came back, Eddie, it's still going to be the same" Jonathan says with a small smile

"We should celebrate, you know" Nancy shrugs

"Oh, I hear you, Wheeler" Eddie chuckles and all of them laughed

"We should cover up those wounds first, Munson" Robin says

His eyes became misty as he is so grateful to have friends like them

Eddie proved Vecna wrong about people not accepting for who he really was....

but... what about you?

Joyce, Murray, Karen all of them decided to keep Eddie's true nature a secret and kept it quiet

Hopper and Enzo agreed with this

So the townspeople won't snoop their noses around him, they'll still believe he's the one that caused it

Fucking close-minded people

"She's deserves to know" he says as he calms down a little bit

"She has to know" he says it himself

No more lies, no more secrets, he doesn't like to see you get betrayed and hurt

But he hopes that you'll won't be disappointed

He's going to admit it all at your first date together

You showed up in Family Video, you went to do all of the tasks as if nothing ever happened last night

Steve and Robin give looks at each other and then back to you

"You know that I can feel your eyes on me, right?" You say while opening the window blinds

"Sorry" Steve says softly

"Y/N, we just wanna know, if you're okay?" Robin says

You bring yourself around to face them "I am totally fine, guys"

You both gave them a reassuring smile

There's still a piece inside of you wanted answers to your questions but you don't want to make things worse, so you kept it to yourself

While you're bringing the storage boxes outside, Eddie approached you while clearing his throat

"Hey, Y/N" he says softly

"Hi" you say sheepishly

"I know what happened last night was so weird, please, forgive me" Eddie says with his doe eyes

His eyes are making you say "aww" on how adorable they are

Wait- you found my eyes appealing? He thinks to himself while he reads your mind

But he stops doing it right away as he feels like he's invading your own thoughts

"You don't have to explain and you don't have to apologize to it anymore, Eddie" you sigh

"Look, just hear me out" he says as he looks deeply into your eyes

You swallowed nervously and you blinked rapidly

Woah- why is your heart beating so fast? Do- do you like me?

He can feel emotions rushing and the energy of it.....is growing wild

You nod for him to continue

"I know this is like way too early but I'm asking you out for a dat-"

"Yes" you cut him off

"I'm not even finished yet" he throws his hand up

"Yes, I would like to go out with you"

"Really?"

"Yeah" you smile at him

He looks straight into your eyes and he might felt come alive again as he doesn't see anything else that is untrue

You're his dream come true

"Are you serious?" He says as he can't believe that you're willing to go with him

You roll your eyes playfully and giggled

Your smile and laughter brings soothing to his heart, even it's not the same anymore

He felt like a normal human being again

You step closer to him and he's taken a back

"You're amazing gentleman, Ed's, that's why I wanted to go out with you, I hope you know that." You say as you place your hand over his cheek and caresses it

He melts into your touch and closes his eyes for a moment and he smile down at you

"Is 7pm alright?" He whispered

"Yes" you replied while you pat his cheek

You walked away leaving a breathless Eddie behind

"Goddamn" he smiles to himself, his smile though slowly fades a little as he remembers what he's going to do tomorrow

You wore a black corset and black ripped jeans

You checked your outfit while looking at yourself in the mirror

"Hmm, it might be too cold outside" so you picked out your sheer white jacket

"You look absolutely divine, honey" your aunt says while she leans over to your doorframe

"Oh, hi, I'm sorry I didn't tell you but I have a date"

"Is it Eddie?"

You gasped and you take a double look at your aunt "How could you know?"

She chortled as she sits down on your bed motioning for you to come sit beside her

You smiled at her and she starts "I see the way you looked at him and the way he looked at you"

"Auntie-" you groaned but she laughs "Just listen to me for a moment"

"Never be afraid just to get out there and explore and have a new adventure at your life"

"When I was your age, me and your uncle just go literally everywhere, and it was the surreal experience of my life" she paused as she snifffles a little

You rub her back and she holds your hand "this thing you have with Eddie? Is very special, I see myself through the both of you"

"You both have the same interest and filled with just pure happiness and imaginary at the things you loved the most"

"Never lose yourself and I love that you kept being yourself, honey"

Your tears are threatening to spill "of course, that's what you always told me when I was a kid"

"Hush now" she presses a kiss to your forehead "don't ruin your makeup and I might be the caused of that" she snickers and you laughed

"See you later, auntie!"

"I love you"

"I love you forever, auntie"

You came in the diner that Eddie asked you to come and for moment there you thought you got stand up but you saw him and sigh of relief

"For a minute, I thought you're not going to show up" you say

"I-I'm sorry, I got nervous"

"You're nervous?" You watch him as he sits down across from you

Eddie has always been so handsome to you but you've never seen this close and you're used to see him wearing bandshirts, denims, leather jackets

He is now wearing a decent attire, a little bit formal but still has the touch of his own style

He's wearing a white polo, black pants with his Reebok

His chains and his rings making you feel hot sensation all over your body

"Am I late? Do I look okay?"

"No- you're not I just arrived 2 minutes early and you look exquisite"

"Exquisite?" He smirks

"Fine" you huffed "you look extremely so handsome tonight, Eddie" you bat your eyes at him

Eddie laughs as he admires your pretty face as he looks at you

You corset goes so finely with you, it hugs your breasts so tightly and he grunts softly at the sight of it, every hairstyle is perfect on you but he loves to see you wearing it down

He loves everything about you

The date is going on smoothly, you both shared laughs and funny stories about each other

Like come on, it's like you're fooling both of yourselves, you've been friends for like over a year now, so this feels so natural for you and so does he

Eddie droves you to over his trailer for a movie date

He put VHS Beetlejuice (1988) as he settles down with a popcorn bowl on his hand and places 2 canned sodas on the table

He froze when you remove your white sheer jacket off and you remove your high-heeled shoes

Good thing, he knows how to control his powers, he can't stand not to see your pulsing veins on your neck as he tries not to take a bite of it

You caught him watching you and he shyly ducks his head down and he moves sideward to give you open space to sit down on the couch

You smirk and sat down beside him

You grab a pillow and you put it in front of you to hug it while you're eating popcorn

He can smell your sweet scent as he exhales slowly, he feels so comfortable whenever you're around

You're paying attention in the movie while he doesn't- he watches you

Your eyelashes are so pretty, he just wants to smushes his own face on you and showers you a lot of kisses

But he doesn't want to do anything rash right now, you're being nice ever since you met him and he hates it he's getting thoughts like this

You looked over to him while chewing on the popcorn on your mouth and you chuckled a little when he looked back at the television screen and he grabs his soda immediately and takes a sip of it

"Whatchu, lookin' at- Ed's?"

"What?"

"I'm not blind, Eddie, I saw you looking at me!"

Oh- his cheeks is on fire

He steals the popcorn bowl from your hands and you gasped "You're making it all up" he says as he throws a popcorn onto his mouth

"Sure, whatever you say, handsome" you roll your eyes as you looked back at the TV

"Handsome? that's the twice she said that to me?!" He thinks to himself

He watches you again

You feel his eyes on you as you quickly turn yourself on him

Once again, you caught him

"Aha!" You point at him "I caught you red-handed!"

You throw popcorn at him and he laughs "Okay, fine!"

"Aww, you feel defeated, Ed's?" You pout at him

God, how can you be so cute and hot at the same time? He thinks to himself

"I am guilty, sweetheart" he says as he smiles down at you

You giggled at him and while you reaching out the pillow that fell down from your lap

"You're beautiful"

"Pardon?"

"I said, you're beautiful" he repeated with a grin on his face

Now, it's your turn to be flustered and you smile at him sheepishly

At this point, you don't even care if you got rejected, you have this crush for him carrying it for a over year now

You gotta take the risk or live with regret

So, fuck it

He loves to see you getting blushed because of him as he takes another sip from his soda while he places it from the table

"Eddie?" You called out for him

"Yeah?"

You and him both stare at each other and he gulped of what you're about to do

You cupped his cheeks and presses your lips into his

You kissed him and his eyes were wide as hell

You pulled back and you furrow your brows at his expression, you can't even read it

You chuckled nervously "oh wow- okay, that was stupid, you know what I'm gonna go-" you get up but he grab your hand

His eyes softens and you look back at him and you slowly sat down again beside him

He tucked your hair behind your ear and he slams his lips onto yours

The kiss was so passionate and it was steaming hot, he tilted his head as he deepens the kiss even more, you moaned

You runs your hands over his chest as you throw your arms around him and one hand over the back of his head as you hold him and pulled him even closer

You both flushed at each other's bodies automatically

His cold hands run over your shoulders and to your thighs

You're both making it out like it was for centuries and he doesn't mind it all

He loves to kiss you forever

You don't even noticed that you both floating up in the air

You pulled away and gasped as you put your hand to cover your mouth

And you look back at Eddie and his eyes are red and you look down at his mouth, you saw his fangs

You're in a state of shock as you felt coming back down on the couch

You breathe heavily of what you just witnessed but you quickly collected yourself

All of the missing pieces are coming together

Now, you understand everything

Eddie is a vampire and you're completely clueless about it

You stare at him and he looks away from you ashamedly but you stopped him from doing it while you place your hand on his cheek to make him face you again

He knits his brows together at your action

You peck a kiss onto his lips and he kisses back "Talk to me"

"I wanna know everything, Eddie" you say to him as you flash a sweet smile

He searches uncertainty on your eyes but he doesn't find anything, he saw compassion and love?

You love him?

He just burst into tears as he goes back to normal again

"Oh, Eddie" you hug him while you rest your head over his chest

He hugs you even tighter and you embrace him even more

You both stayed like this in comfortable silence

Locked into each other's arms

He runs his fingers through your hair and you sigh in comfort

You broke the silence first "Before you can think of anything that I don't want you anymore after this, I won't do it, Eddie, I really mean it"

His eyes are still blurry from the tears as he looks down on you and kisses the top of your head

You hum in agreement with a smile on your face

"I- I adored you ever since, Eddie, I love you" you confessed

You felt him get tensed up and he looks at you in shock

You pulled away from him and you cup his cheeks

"I am willingly to spend my whole life with you, Eddie"

He never felt this much happiness in his life but he smiles sadly at the thought-

He's immortal and you're not, his lifetime will be different in the world and yours will be end up fast unfortunately

At least he got the taste of true love but he really wants to make that happen

Loving each other endearingly

But he also doesn't want to cross over the line, you might want to live your life normally

"Oh, sweetheart" his eyes are brimmed with tears and yours too

He got confused "What is it, darling?"

"I- I thought I will be rejected" you laugh "but I see nothing but the truth in your eyes, Ed's" you say

"Even you don't say it-" he cuts you off by saying

"I love you too, Y/N" he kisses your cheek

"Ever since the first time we met" he added

Your lips clashes onto each other as you make out again

Eddie carried you into his room not wanting to break the kiss

He closes the door and locks it and he places you slowly on his bed

You helped him unbotton his polo and you quickly rushed to unclasp your corset

"No, let me" he stopped you and you nod at him

"Are you sure about this?" He asks before he continues to undresses you

You just nod at him and he sighs as he doesn't want to make this go any further if you're aren't up to this truly

He does not want to make you regret it, it's fine for him, if you're not ready

"Hey" he lifts your chin up to make you look at him in the eyes

"I need verbal answers, sweets" he says as he narrows his eyes on you

"I-I've longed for this, Eddie and I only want you"

"Okay" he says softly as he kisses on your knuckles

You make love for the first time and you're so sure of yourself that he is your person

You're going to settle the life that you want with Eddie

You're naked, laying on his bed, your hair is a beautiful mess

You blushed when you noticed his eyes are roaming around your body from top to bottom

You got shy, you tried to cover yourself by wrapping your arms around you

He licks his lips and his eyes filled with hunger, he chuckles darkly

"Damn- that's so hot, why does he have to do that" you think to yourself

"My love, I was just admiring you" he says as he places both of his hands on your hips

"My love?" your knees are now wobbling at his words

"I can't take my eyes off you, you're a goddess!"

"Oh- stop it! Eddie, I-" he cuts you off with a fervid kiss

You squealed and you can feel his smirk while kissing you

You grab a fistful of his hair and he groaned on top of you and as his hands roam over around your body earning a whimper from you

He deepens the kiss even more as he unbuckled his belt

You're already got so worked up by the simplest touches that he did

The effect he has on you, is freaking unreal

He breaks the kiss and you frown, he laughed while he grabs something on the drawer

"I want to be safe"

Your heart melts as he cares about your pleasure first

He pulled his boxers all the way down and you squirmed

Oh, he is huge, you don't even know if you can take it

"You can take it, don't worry, hunny" he winks at you as if he can read your mind (you didn't know that he can truly do that)

He places himself back on top of you and grab his dick directing to your hole

"You ready?"

"Yes, I am, Eddie"

"I applaud your attentiveness, sweetheart"

He takes himself in slowly and you scrunched up in pain

"Just tell me to stop and I will stop" eying you in concern

"No- no, I'm adjusting, keep going"

The moment his all the way in, you look down and you saw that he filled you up real good

"Oh" you breathe heavily

"Told you can take it"

"E-Eddie- you can move now"

He thrust and he grunts as at your pussy already clenching

"Wow, my darling- you impressed me"

You want to keep your eyes open but can't help by the overwhelming sensation burns through your system

"It feels so good, go harder, please" you beg and he doesn't want to keep you begging for more as his thrusts grows harder and harder

You kept your lustful eyes on him

"Don't you dare look at me like that or I will tore you apart" he thinks to himself

"Ah- Eddie! Oh my fucking god!" You moaned

He grabs your legs and places it over his shoulders

He watches as your chest rises up and down

You got confused ignoring the enrapture that you're feeling at the moment

"Eddie- what are you-" you got cut off as he deepens himself down onto you

You can't suppress your moans any longer as you moaned louder

You grip on the sheets as he fucks you roughly

He even watches your boobs bounce up and down, he smirks at the sight of it, he is enjoying himself

"Holy- shit- oh!" You exclaimed

"Baby, I'm coming, I can't take it anymore"

You arched your back in pleasure as he came undone

He falls down on you even though you felt weak, you still manage to hug him

You can feel him smiling at your action and you run your fingers through his hair

He carefully puts down your shaking legs

Your eyes are heavy lidded, your cheeks are flushed, Eddie slowly pull himself out of you

He wiped you, cleaned you, he pulled a clean bandshirt on you and he chuckles softly on how big it is to you as he dresses you up with his clean boxers

He wore his pajama pants as he cuddles next to you

"How's that?" He asks

"It's astounding" you say while your eyes are closed

He bursted out laughing and you furrow you brows as you slap his arm playfully

"I-I am sorry" he is tearing up from laughter "your choice of words are remarkable" he says with a British accent

You laughed at him "Well, you're not the only one" you snorted

"Oh- how dare you" he says dramatically

You rolled your eyes as you push him back laying down on the bed

You caught him by surprise

You remove his boxers that belonged to him and his

You sat down at him without any warnings and you bite your bottom and you moaned

With his lips apart while looking at you

You place your hands over his shoulders as you begin to ride him, your eyes rolling back as you can feel yourself getting wet because of him

He squeezes his eyes shut on the sweet sensation as you say

"Round 2?" You say menacingly as you smirk down on him

He moans while laughing in the process "where have you been all my life?"

He takes care of you after you both make love again

As soon as he goes back beside you, he's picking up the clothes that he wants to put on you, you're ready to snuggle up with him and yes he will cuddle up with you as soon as he dresses at you up he insists to do that one first but you give him a scowling face

He chortled at how clingy you are

He pulled up the blankets as he lays down and he open his arms out for you

You smiled as you lay your head over his shoulders and hug him and he kisses your forehead

Now at this time, he told you everything about him, about what happened 2 years ago

"I wish I was there for you" you start "they didn't even look hard enough, you're innocent"

"I appreciate that, Y/N, Thank you"

"And I also appreciate your honesty" you pulled back to look down at him and you smile

Your prop your arm up and you say "So there's this other world that you guys called the upside down and this asshole named Vecna did this to you?"

"Yeah, that's sums it all up"

His story sounds like the sci-fic, adventure and action films that you watched before and now knowing that this really happened sends goosebumps into your skin

"Where's Jason now? I would like to punch him in the face"

"Easy there, tiger" he chuckled

"You didn't deserve that! Eddie!" Your eyes are forming with tears

Eddie pulled you into a hug as he rubs your back

He is now sobbing softly with happy tears

You're not afraid, you trust him, you accept him, and you even love him

His eyes flashes with so much gratitude

You suddenly became concerned as you heard him crying

Both of your eyes are stained with tears

"What's wrong, Ed's?"

"Nothing, I just" he sniffles "I didn't know that I got to have you and called you mine"

You smile widely "I'm yours forever"

"I'm yours forever" he keeps replaying it in his head

"I'm so lucky that you exist and you're here with me"

"Because I thought I would never have-

"Someone?"

"Yeah"

"You're my first" you admit

"What?"

"I don't wanna give myself to someone who wasn't true to himself" you paused

"I was never in love with anyone until you, Eddie"

His eyes glint with teary eyes with overjoyed coming into his face

"Me too" he says while you into his eyes and look for dishonest on them but nothing

You fall for him even harder

"I love you, Eddie"

"I love you forever and ever"

You snuggled up together as you slowly close your eyes as you drift away to sleep

Eddie is wide awake somehow gobsmacked at his life right now

He embraces you even tighter as if you might disappeared from him

You hold onto him close as you bury yourself on his chest

His sheets are now covered with your scent and he just loves it, mixed with vanilla and lavender from your shampoo

He can also smell the lotion from your soft skin, flowery and fresh scent

He smiles in content as he fell asleep....

Everything is going so well, why does it have to be like this?

An intense magnitude Earthquake happened all over across the town of Hawkins, Indiana

You and your auntie hold on to each other inside the diner

You both tried to stay calm as you both headed towards the exit

A big rumble on the ground made you both ripped at each others hands

Your eyes widen in fear and you screamed "No! Auntie!"

A big pole that fell back down on her crushes her entirely

The earthquake is becoming more and more stronger as you ran towards her

"Y/N! Stop! Save yourself!" She chokes on her own blood

"No- I won't leave you!" A small wall but heavy enough slams down on the half of your body made you screech in pain

"R-remember what I told you, sunshine"

"I-I love you" she blinks slowly and she dies

"Auntie" you cried out "N-No"

You felt dizzy and you look down wincing in pain, your head bleeds as before you got unconscious the last words you said

"Eddie...."

"I need to find Y/N before it's too late" Eddie says

"Be careful, kid" Enzo says while he and Hopper protect everyone in the open ground area

Eddie gasps as he saw you laying in your own blood, your heart is slowly beating

You're still alive, but losing a lot of blood

"Don't you die on me!" He shouts as he raises the wall that almost crushed you

Eddie saw your lifeless, Aunt, "oh- I am so sorry, sweetheart"

Your mind is hazy but you knew the person who is carrying you

"You came"

"Of course, sweetheart, I'm taking you to the hospital"

"I-I tried to save her" you say weakly your nose starts to bleed

Eddie cries in anger as he quickly finds a hospital

The earthquake is finally over, everyone was wounded, lost a loved a one, lost a home

Emergency vans, were everywhere

The hospital is crowded, every nurse and doctor are running all over the hallways

Eddie's knee kept bopping up and down as he couldn't stay calm at what you're state your in

The doctor finally talked to him and said it's bad news

"She might not make it, I'm sorry"

He cries in agony and this is his greatest fear, losing you.....unless....

There is only one solution to save you

He comes inside your room and he weep even harder as he saw you slowly breathing

It's not your time yet, this isn't fair

"I want to save you, but I don't know if it's also that you want" he says as he holds your hand

You heard him and you slowly opened your eyes and he saw it, his eyes are bloodshot from crying, his clothes are covered with your blood

"Do it, Eddie" you say

"But I don't wanna-"

"Please, Eddie, I don't want you to be alone and I don't wanna leave you behind, I really want this"

"If I do this, you might not be able to do the normal things anymore"

"Let me into your world, Eddie"

"I've got nothing to lose, I only have you" you sob

He can feel you're very certain, he warns this might hurt a little and you'll die for a second

He bites your neck and he cut his wrist to make you drink his blood

You drank a lot and you can feel your heartbeat finally comes to an end

Your eyes, your complexion is now similar to Eddie's, your hair became more wavy, your whole appearance changed

You gasped for air and you didn't feel any pain on you anymore

You looked over to Eddie and you laughed slightly and he hugs you tightly

3 months after the earthquake

Hopper grabs the walkie-talkie and he calls Eddie to come over

When he arrived Dustin and Steve and everyone is in there

He showed him the "WANTED" picture as Hopper explains the criminal that you and Eddie need to capture

Before he continues he exclaims "Where the hell is Y/N?!"

"I'm here, Jim" you say as you entered the room with Eddie's black leather jacket draped over your shoulders

Eddie smirks at your entrance

You take a quick sip of your flask with blood droplet on your chin and you wipe it off using your finger

"So, where to- Chief?" You smile with subtle red glow on your eyes

[doggernaut]

INJURY FIC INJURY FIC

Oh hello, you've found the fic most likely to be published sometime soon, if only because when I was looking at it I realized it's really just a short little Jack character study and only needs a little bit of work to make it publishable.

I have posted about this more on my main Tumblr account, but I'm a runner and in the past year and a half have been struggling with what seems like endless post-Covid lung issues and injuries. I went from running a PR marathon in April of 2022 to barely being able to run three miles at a pace five minutes slower than my PR pace. For somebody who has never really had to contend with injuries over almost 30 years of running (I took several months off when I strained my calf in 2016, but got into barre classes during that time), it has been humbling. And frustrating. I spend like an hour a day doing my stupid PT exercises and it feels like I've accomplished nothing. And I figured I could take all my feelings about being an aging athlete and give them to Jack. Because you know who would be pissed off about being forced to slow down due to a minor injury? Jack Zimmermann.

(Projecting all of my feelings onto Jack, by the way, has not really helped. But maybe other readers will see themselves in this fic and feel not-so-alone?)

“Can you explain it to me?” Bitty asks. “Euh … I’ll try.” Jack isn’t sure if he can explain what he’s feeling to Bitty because he’s not sure he understands it himself.  Bitty gives Jack’s shoulder a little squeeze, a nonverbal cue that he’s ready to listen whenever Jack’s ready. It takes Jack a minute to gather his thoughts. “I know I need to rest,” Jack begins. “I know I need to slow down and let things run their course, and I know it’s good for my body. Healing. But my mind just …” Bitty presses a kiss to the back of Jack’s neck. “I know.” “Sometimes my thoughts get a little out of control,” Jack admits. “Not in a bad way. Not like before. But I’ve been wondering if this is it. Maybe this time I won’t heal. Or I’ll fall so far out of shape that I’ll never get back to where I was. And I’ll just keep falling behind until they tell me I’m done. I’m not as young as I used to be. There are new guys who are faster, hungrier. Whenever I face off against some young kid I think about how I was at eighteen, how I thought guys my age had one foot out the door.” “Well, first of all,” Bitty murmurs soothingly, “nobody is gonna tell the Jack Zimmermann that he’s done.” Jack manages a smile in spite of himself. “I know it’s not rational.” Bitty presses another kiss, feather-light, to the back of Jack’s neck. “Honey, I know how you feel about slowing down, but maybe you should try to change the narrative,” he says gently. “What do you mean?” “Well, instead of telling yourself you’re lazy, try thinking of it as recovering. Right now the best thing you can do for yourself is rest a little so you can start the new season healthy and strong. When’s the last time you gave yourself permission to slow down?

Permission? That’s a new concept. Jack can’t recall ever giving himself permission to slow down. His overdose forced him to slow down, but that wasn’t a choice. This doesn’t feel like a choice either, but Bitty is right. Jack’s been in therapy long enough to know that there’s a difference between then and now, that slowing down now is something he has to do if he wants to keep moving forward.  “Just remember,” Bitty adds, “every rest day, every easy PT session, is an investment in a stronger, more resilient you. And it’s all gonna pay off big time next season.” “You’re good at this. You sure you don’t want to get into coaching?” “Oh, it’s hardly me at all! I’ve just been spending a lot of time on the inspirational, body positive side of Instagram.” “You have?” Seven years together, and Bitty’s still surprising Jack. Bitty shrugs. “I know it was a million years ago, but I used to be an athlete, too. Long enough ago that my body definitely isn’t the same.” There’s a hint of resignation in Bitty’s tone. “I know that’s not a bad thing, but it’s still hard to accept sometimes. Especially living with you, looking like you do.”  “Bits, you’ve never said anything,” Jack says, feeling a little guilty for not picking up on the fact that Bitty’s been going through this too. “And I wasn’t gonna,” Bitty says, “because most days I don’t think about it. My life is a lot different now, and that’s a good thing! But I can’t lift as much as I used to at the gym, and you know I can’t always keep up with you on our morning runs. And it’s my choice, I know. I’m happy with my yoga class and running most mornings and doing the Turkey Trot once a year, but sometimes it’s still—” Bitty shrugs. “Honey, you’re a professional athlete. It’s hard not to compare myself to you. Or who I was just a few years ago, for that matter. So I follow a few accounts that help keep things in perspective. There’s this whole community of former athletes, and people who are recovering from illness or injury, and people who are just starting on their fitness journey, and they remind me I’m not alone. Your pace isn’t my pace, and that’s okay.”   Jack laughs in spite of himself. “Okay, now you sound like an influencer.” “And you honey—” Bitty places a gentle hand on Jack’s chest—“your pace today doesn’t have to be your pace yesterday, or last year. We’re all works in progress.”

[senzasord]

Life update - haven't done one of these in a while, but I reached a save point, so a good time for it.

Read more break because it's longish:

- finally finished the assignment that was due in april. Far too late to submit, but I've emailed my course advisor (and will over the next week build up the courage to email my unit coordinator as well). I don't have to process this until next year when I re-take the unit, but if you don't count my capstone assessment for prac next year, then that was my last assignment for my masters of teaching. I'm frustrated with how long it took, but I really enjoyed completing it, and maybe I'll get to implement it one day (it was a proposal for a classroom intervention)

- mum and older sib finally found a rental, and also grandad's will has been done, so for the first time in my life I'm not worried about mum having money. Hopefully it lasts - it's not too much, but enough that i can breathe, and mum's getting better with money too, so it should last a bit. I actually really don't know what to do with myself.

- Cody has an infected paw. Vet wants to do exploratory surgery. I'm worried because of his age, but they wouldn't recommended it if they weren't sure he couldn't handle it. Now that mum can afford it, it's been scheduled after the move

- Singing lessons are going well - won't go into it too much because I've been doing that enough on the other blog. Almost done for the year though. I hope to rebuild my practice over the summer

- Had another big flare from around mid-July to end of August, and spent September recovering from it, but doing better now. It's been really frustrating because the whole point of moving my prac was to have this half of the year to work on my health (e.g. starting the CHOP protocol to manage my POTS better), but most of the time has been taken up by flaring and finishing that assignment (which was, of course, delayed because of the flare). I've been trying to make peace with it by reminding myself the flare would have happened anyway, and it's been informative to know I can finish anything given enough time and not forced to quit for the start of a new unit. Also, class doesn't go back until February, so I still do have a lot of time. I might have to move my prac again, but again, that decision is a long way off. My brain is just good at dilating and shrinking timeframes in an unhelpful way. Knock on wood for no more big flares for the rest of the year (and not catching covid third year in a row! Now that the flare is over and my assignment is finished, I can get my booster finally)

- Now that flare is over, slowly reconnecting with friends I haven't been able to stay in touch with. Slow going, but it's been good to see people and talk to people in real life who aren't my coworkers, my housemate, and my doctors. Also means I get to enjoy better the company of my friends of my weekly discord game. They'd never admit it, but I can be pretty annoying during a flare, so I'm glad we might get a reprieve from me for a while

I think there's other stuff, but those are the big ones. I've promised myself to do no teaching study for a few weeks. But I do have start all the admin and house things i"ve been putting off - I currently have 8 empty butter containers soaking for recycling that have been slowly collecting in the fridge since february. I hope I don't make a fool of myself by being optimistic - I could have another flare tomorrow. And I'm still exhausted all the time, but at the moment it's less so, so for the time being, I'll take the win.

Edit: my friend just finished their thesis!!!! WAHOOOOOO!!!!

[girlgrandpa]

i think my problem, like really truly, is that i feel very stuck. i have to move in April, but if i stay in London then I'm going to be paying more rent than i am now and i can't afford to do that on my current salary; equally I want to find a new job, but at the moment i have too many freelance/copyediting commitments, until may/june ish, and my current job gives me enough flexibility that i can do both, and i can't meet these commitments if i'm working a 9-5 without entirely exhausting myself (again); i'm stuck where i am until at least may, but changes coming sooner than that are forcing me unstuck where i have nowhere else to go. the timelines don't add up! i'm reconsidering applying for a phd, but if i want to do that then i need to prepare an application either in the next 4 months or so whilst i'm balancing all the current chaos, or whilst working full time further down the line. i also think the phd should be what i do if and when i decide to leave London, because it would give me a community/purpose in whatever place i land in next? but equally one of the people i'd potentially like to work with as a supervisor is based in London at the university i studied/work at, and i don't want to stay there. and, i'm not sure if i can live/study on the funding stipend (if i even got funding) because it's £3k less than i earn now and i'm not sure how viable it would be for me to work at the same time. so much of me is ready to leave now (but that also has the issue of ��/freelance/work), but also 90% of the people i know and love are here. but as a city it isn't meeting my needs, and i can't afford to spend £800 on rent to live in a place that doesn't—especially not on my current salary; i live paycheck to paycheck as it is and an extra £200 on top of that isn't viable. i feel trapped, and ultimately it's the editing commitments that are causing that because i can't do anything else until I've seen them through to the end. it's frustrating, i'm impatient; i want to fix it now and not down the line; it's on the horizon and i can see it and it scares me because i don't have a solution, and all of that is overwhelming

[lightning-kachow]

Conference Call | Self Para

Date: Late April 2023 Warnings: None

Lightning catches up with his team.

"Alright, is everybody here? Lightning McQueen."

"Jenn Harvey, publicity."

"Got it."

"Mack Hauler, personal assistant!"

"Mack, you're sitting next to me."

"Yeah, I just felt like I should—"

"Rusty, Team Rust-Eze."

"Dusty, Team Rust-Eze."

"Got it, got it, Chuck, you here?"

"Not Chuck. Mike Pitts here, Speedway Management."

"Right." Okay, yes, Lightning had been working with this guy for twenty years, but he never really saw him. And he looked like a Chuck! This was a conference call, so Lightning couldn't actually see him... fine. He sounded like a Chuck.

Anyway.

"Sooo... lay it on me. I'm in the UK, Lille's coming up in two weeks and it'd be easy to get there, and I'm in shape for it." Bit of an exaggeration, but Lightning could get in shape for it. It was worth it to him. "What do you need from me? I think we can all agree I've been a good boy and we can put all this bullshit behind us—"

"Lightning—"

"Sorry, sorry, you all know what I mean." Seriously, they were all adults here! Harv could chill.

There was a pause that indicated that maybe they didn't all know what he meant. The longer it went on, the more Lightning's stomach roiled.

"Well?" he said again, glancing at Mack, who looked bemused as usual.

"Lightning, the thing is, we're just not sure," Rusty finally said, his voice crackling through the speakerphone.

His stomach dropped. "Not sure? My dude, I've been patient for months, and Lille is in two weeks, and it's literally the perfect opportunity to re-launch me. I could stay in Swynlake. Home base here and just travel on the weekends for races. It'd be a little more travel than usual once we start getting to the West Coast season, but..."

"I know. I know, Lightning. We're just... not sure."

Lightning cycled through a lot of reactions in the span of thirty seconds. Anxiety, disappointment, frustration— but he settled on anger. Because really, that was how he mostly felt. He was angry. These fucking people had strung him along for eight months, telling him to be a little more patient, to wait a little longer, and now they didn't even have the guts to fire him properly.

Had they ever even intended to? Or were they just trying to slowly ghost him? Was sending him to this shitty little town really a strategic move, or were they just trying to get him out of the way until he gave up?

Well, Lightning wasn't giving up. He hadn't come this far to give up. Didn't they know him better? Didn't they know he was motivated by spite, fueled by it just as much as his carbo-loading pre-race pasta feasts? It was effective against his enemies. And now it was going to be effective against his supposed "allies."

"I can't believe this."

"Lightning..." Not-Chuck started, and Lightning couldn't stand that pitying condescension in his voice.

"No, no, I'm not doing this shit. You're not seriously going to tell me two weeks out from the first race of the season that you're not sure you're continuing with the deal. What, are you gonna let me know the morning of the race? I don't like being strung along. What is this, fucking high school? You're hoping I'll be the one to break up with you first?"

That was how it felt, really. That awful, petty dance of teenage dating. It was insulting, really. Did they really think he wouldn't figure it out?

"Monty, can we sidebar after this?" Harv said forcefully, as though daring him to interrupt her. She sounded irritated. "Rusty, Dusty, this is good info. Mike's assistant will follow up with you. We'll work out a plan. Lightning, you'll be looped in, obviously."

"Will I?" Lightning said it listlessly, suddenly checked-out after having thrown his little fit. He glanced at Mack, who just stared back at him with wide, terrified eyes.

He barely paid attention to the rest of the call, logistics and then pleasantries that really all amounted to the same answer, the answer Lightning hadn't wanted. He was getting benched.

He tried to tell Harv as much after everyone else had left the call. "I mean, I had one question. They refused to answer it. Which pretty much tells us everything we need to know," Lightning sighed.

"Monty, it's more complicated than that."

"Is it?" His tone was less angry now, more tired. "It's never been complicated before. This can't just be about those fucking tweets. It's been eight months."

Harv sounded equally exhausted. Which annoyed Lightning. This wasn't her life. This wasn't her livelihood. Lightning would keep her on the payroll, regardless of what Rusty and Dusty said, right?

"We're just... we've still gotta work out what your comeback angle is—"

"Comeback? I never left!"

"Okay, but it looks like..."

"Only because Rusty and Dusty are fucking benching me!"

Harv sighed. "Monty. I'm trying to help you out here."

"Well, it's not very helpful."

There was a stony silence.

"Look, I'm sorry," Lightning finally said. "This isn't your fault. I'll figure it out. I won't let you down. Rusty and Dusty are gonna be so sorry they ever dragged their feet."

"Please just... be sensible, alright?" Harv replied, knowing she wouldn't win this war. She'd have to pick her battles.

"When am I ever not?"

And suddenly, Lightning remembered: he had the perfect opportunity in front of him. And he'd practically already committed to him. He didn't need Rust-Eze. Well, he kind of did, but he could make it look like he didn't. He was gonna jump into this thing Cruz had pitched him, full force. And that would show Rust-Eze.

[linaket]

Weekly Writing Update (3/13/2023)

It has certainly been... over a week since I did one of these. But in my defense, I posted monthly goals between my missed updates, and things have been heckin' frantic in my life these last few weeks. They are beginning to settle a bit now, though I am still in severe need of a rest day (haven't technically had a day where I was able to just recharge in... three?-ish weeks.)

But... down to the business...

10/15 chapters complete

word count: 23k

Excerpt:

“That was taken from a chieftain in Attarabi,” Salinae said, his lips close enough to Vahn’s neck that he could feel the words forming on them. “His tribe was one of the last to surrender, but he surrendered nonetheless.”

Vahn didn’t need a lesson in warfare. He’d fought in Atarrabi himself, with Kanna, on the front. He didn’t want to remember the betrayal in the myriad jewel-eyes when they recognized the spark in his, didn’t want to think about how long it had been since then that he’d seen eyes like his that belonged to the living. What Vahn needed was touch, teeth, the hard press of another until the fire in his bones slaked itself and Vahn didn’t have to think of war anymore.

🎵 Music: All Ours by Talos

Our temples are coming in godless Hide when it's wild in the snow I'll leave when the gardens are darkest I'll heed in the warnings of war

Thoughts:

I've been concerned about my pacing in TS. There's this nagging thing in my head that the story isn't balancing out right. Even though I know that I won't be able to tell this until it's finished with drafting, I can't help but chew on that concern and turn it over and over, stressing about if it is then how can I fix it and how much time will it take to fix it since I'm hoping to have TS at least ebook ready by August.

I think that stress still comes from the demand of serial writing. Shadow's Prey Act 3 will finish posting in early April, and I got nothing after that. I'm just... not used to not releasing things, I've been going steady on SP for I think over three years now? Though TS isn't formatted for serial and wasn't intended to be, and neither will the next thing I'm writing be, but it's... like this strange ache in my teeth that I can't scratch or shake.

In better news: the scenes I'm currently working on are moving quicker than my usual slow crawl, thanks I think to my zero-draft. I've hit the spot of writing that I'm most comfortable in, which is that time when all the set up starts converging and rolling to the finale. This means I get to be a lot less careful with my repeated motifs because they are supposed to be noticed now, blaring in the readers' mind and recalling earlier instances instead of just subtly hanging out.

Still hoping to try and get this finished before April 1st. I really think that just a few solid writing sessions should get me through enough to get there, it's just finding time to get those sessions in...

[previous update.]

Taglist: @lynnedwardswrites [ask to be added!]

[06theloser]

TMNT 2012 OC IDEAS

hakdvdskhsn, it's 2 am I have to clear my floors Cuz I guy is coming over to power clean all my carpets and I start work at 12, HOWEVER I HAD A TOILET THOUGHT. OKSY SO 3 2012 TMNT OCS, main one is a 17 year old half Japanese half Columbian boy. Stay with me here. HIS LITTLE SISTER, okay? SHE AND A STRAY CAT SHE FOUND ON THE WAY HOME FROM SCHOOL, GET INTO AN ACCIDENT WITH SUM MUTAGEN AND BOOM! TWO YOUNG CAT MUTANTS. the sister is 8 and the Stray cat is about 4. They both come home to the grandparent and the older brother. Lots of panic, obviously. The next day big bro is round the back of the school om the phone talking to his alma about how to take care of them, CASEY JONES over hears, offers to help, bro doesn't trust at all and leaves. Casey goes to tell the turtles, Splinter and April back at the house and April offers to help Casey get rhem to help. Splinter tell them to get the girls to the house.

NEXT DAY Casey comes back to help him and April is with him. Bro accepts it reluctantly because although Casey seems cool, April passes him off. Casey and April take the car to the house, then drive the three siblings to the house, bro is being very protective and hold the girls close the entire car ride and even after they arrive. The three meet the turtles and Splinter. Immediately bonds with mikey and respects Leo and Splinter, doesn't trust Donnie one bit after seeing hiw he acts with april and refuses to speak to either April or donniw the whole time. Constantly keeping his guard up around raph and hold the girls close but is more relaxed around mikey and Splinter. He talks to Splinter, Leo and raph while mikey and Casey show the girls around and entertain them. Accepts splinters offer to leave the girls with them and visit on weekends, and the grandparents will know about their safety but skip out on their new carers being mutants too to keep everyone safe. Raph, and april are forced to promise to not speak to or teach the girls anything and donnie is only allowed to talk to them when teaching them all due to the brothers first impressions of them. And they are not to be taught combat only self defense. Those were the conditions the brother insisted on until he further interacted with them himself. Everyone but April agrees and respects this(Raph is reluctant but obliged after the brother explained it was mostly temporary until the brother knew them all better)

Casey takes him home after saying his goodbyes and tell the grandparents the girls were staying on a secluded farm on the other side of the forest with a middle-aged couple and their 9 year old kid. He lied and said the couple has taken care of a similar case until the mutant decided to live on his own in the wild somewhere. Idk something believable along those lines. T he brother becomes friends with Casey and helps him at school, and Casey drives him to and from the house to visit the girls.

He eventually warms up to donnie a little bit and Raph by a lot. He himself talk to donnie about science stuff and mechanics with Casey but donnie still isn't allowed to interact woth the girls outside of teaching. But Raph is as long as Leo isn't with them and he cannot lay a hand on anyone besides threats infront of the girls. He still hates April and April quickly hates him back, causing a passive aggressive "I hate you but I'm gonna smile anyway because it's polite and I'm too mature to fight you" relationship with donnie. Bro insults the ugly ugg boots off of April but she never comes up with a good come back and Raph teams with the brother and him up everytime.

Casey was really conflicted with his friendship with the brother and April even after he moved on from April, but that later changed after Casey dumped the whole Love triangle story to the bro and the bro explains how she's way too toxic and should try and softly hint that to donnie bc the bro can't get through o donniw even if he wanted to. Casey understands himself better now and sees how bad April actually is as a person.

The Stray Cat is eventually adopted to idea of being the baby sister and now is considered family to the other cat mutant and the human bro. All three are super close and the girls get excited whenever their bro cokes by on the weekends. Whenever there's mission or an emergency the bro gets called and he stays with them at the house or the girls are either taken back to the bro and grandparents if the house is under attack.

After the donnie atom split, April is banished from the team entirely and the bro basically replaces her role and visits every day he doesn't have work. He and the girls learn to use European style swords instead of Japanese weapons because grandma used to be a swordsman and fencing instructor. Bro also uses guns. He aint fvcking around

[mayasdeluca]

I don't really care about Schmitt leaving, I never really liked him, for me to really keep watching Grey's they should keep AT LEAST the core women that for me are Bailey, Amelia and Teddy the rest can go or just keep coming for recurring roles, if they loose Owen is just the cherry on top, god I wish, but I think his ass is glued to their chair sadly. But at this point I get less invested the more they go on anyway.

ER had a better way to keep interest in even after changing the core cast after years, it worked so much better and I stayed until the end even if it lost some ways, and I was more invested in the new characters than greys, also they had NURSES!! the core of the hospitals, grey's should have invested in that.

I never really got attached to the new interns and I don't think the viewers are too, hell I never even got attached to the older interns like schmitt jo etc etc, I kept watching because the vets were there, there was Arizona, Teddy, April, Amelia, Maggie even Meredith (I liked the sister trio), they all had chemistry, you lose the vets you lose the viewers imo, I don't think people watch for the new interns story lines no matter how they tried to make them the next generation of the OG interns, they are not. idk, I don't know why they keep renewing it at this point.

I don't really care that he leaves either but it is telling that it's another LGBTQ+ character leaving. It doesn't seem like Helm is going to be on much longer either. But let's just keep Owen around, the straight white man who is one of the worst characters in tv history. 🙄

It's definitely been hard to get invested in the new interns. I don't know if it's just because the show is stale at this point or they just aren't interesting enough or both but there was no reason to expand the cast that big when they can't focus enough on any character to give them a decent storyline. The women that are left that have been there for a while like you mentioned are the only ones worth watching at this point and most of them are gone now too. Teddy would be interesting if she was away from Owen but that's rare so basically Amelia is one of the only reasons and she barely gets anything of substance.

The writing is on the wall though now that the new schedule is out and they've moved Grey's to the death slot and they've started making budget cuts and cast members are leaving. I'm expecting them to announce it's Grey's last season probably sometime in the fall when it starts to premiere. I would assume maybe they will give the writers a heads up first since they seem to respect that show way more than they ever respected Station 19 but who knows. They are turning the network into the Ryan Murphy network so by next year I'm sure all 3 shows on Thursday will be his.

[camillewasthere]

april 28 2024

It's 10pm and I'm about to get high. In a few weeks i'll be 32 years old. What a wild time.

When I got back from the gym today I was looking at baby pictures of Jannika and I. I look at baby version of me and I get kinda sad. I'm looking at a girl with not a clue what's in store. I want to protect the baby version of me from the world. It's sad to realize how things happen. That in order to be a well rounded person, you have to experience all things.

One memory I think about a lot when I was a child was when I got little papers, scissors and random art supplies and put it in a little ziploc. I wanted to hide it for some reason. I don't know who would want to look for a ziploc bag of art supplies. I decided to hide it on top of my uncle/grandma's vanity which was high as fuck. Probably a foot awat from the ceiling. When I tried to hide it, the bag fell. And I never found it again.

I was such a shy child. I always made sure to be mindful. To be aware. I was always watching everyone else. Always conscious of the space I took. Never feeling part of the crowd. Somehow always fake. Just observing. I love baby me. And I think if baby me knew the person I would become, she would be proud. She would want me to be happy and chose the road that brings fulfillment. She would probably think I was pretty. She would probably watch me do my makeup. She would be content with just being there with me.

I have been in my head a lot lately. Constantly strategizing. Thinking about what's next. What move is the right move. It's funny how much it consumes me. But how little I convey on the outside. People only see the product but never realize how long the process took.

Moving up to the bay area has been weighing heavily on my mind. Last time I went to visit I remember how much I liked being there. It felt more home-y to me.

Cons: It's colder Bears on hikes lol Probably more expensive Miss Daniela!

Pros: Better food Paid more Shady hikes Probably find the loml lol New cities to explore Easy way to go north or south to go on trips Less white people lol

Wow putting it out on a list like this actually makes it seem way more desirable. I can't wait to find a place I can furnish. With a washer dryer. No carpet. I'm so excited.

Before I end this I do want to at least talk about how i've been feeling.

It's been almost 6 months since the break up. He's still living here until our lease is over at the end of June. It's a conflicting feeling. Every day that gets closer, the more nervous I get about the plan with the dogs. But when I think about him being gone, all I can feel is excited. It's like I can finally be free of that energy. I can't wait to fix up my space. To be in my thoughts alone at home. So happy I have the dogs to protect me and keep me company. I don't really feel lonely. I know that will likely change once he's actually out of here. But for a long time before we broke up I was already doing so many things alone. It's liberating to be single honestly. I have almost zero desire to be with anyone. I say almost because I continue to be intrigued by the idea of Lori and Bre's friend and I being together. I don't want to imagine this as something more than it is, which is literally nothing lol. But it does seem like a possibility. I have to let my mind leave it at that. Old me would continue to obsess. New me wants to focus on what is good for me. What will make me happy. Because ultimately I want to be able to be so content with myself that anyone who seeks after me will only be an addition. I've settled for soooo long with too many guys that weren't right for me, whether they were good or bad. There's a reason they all didn't work out. Including long lost air force man. I need to allow my brain to understand that concept. The common denominator with all of those relationships is me. My physical self would constantly make deals with my emotional self that would lead to me staying for longer than I should have.

What's wild is, despite all the break up's i've had, I think the one with flannel mustache boy was the worst of the worst. Thinking about that relationship makes me wanna throw up to be honest. He was so handsy and gross. So flashy. Literally i'm barfing right now imagining how others saw us.

Anyway, yeah I'm stoked to be on my own. I love being home alone. Having a space all to myself is gonna be such a nice little vacation.

xx me