#i really do hope people like this...

[loosesodamarble]

Hii Soda, Here I'm sending my best wishes for your well-being 🩷🩷 I might made some mistakes in my text, I hope that you don't mind them. I'm not a native speaker.

I wanted to make a one-shot request for Nacht Faust where the reader (who is also a Black Bull) despises his all-knowing personality, and how he scorns at the members. And she always talks back at him about his remarks about the members. But things escalate, I don't know how I didn't think this far 😭 I'd love to know what you can come up with this, I just want to read some fluff and see him happy 🥹🩷✨️

Hello there Anon~! First off, thank you for the well wishes, I do kinda need them at this moment. And don't worry about writing in your second language. I make tons of mistakes still land English is my first language. 😅

This oneshot turned into something a little on the long side. I couldn't think of how to make a romance between a critical reader and Nacht work without it feeling weird so I did something longer to show how the two grow closer (not quite a slow burn but the fluff isn't immediate either). It's part of why it took a bit to finish your request. It's probably not exactly what you were picturing but hopefully you still like it.

Summary: The progression of your relationship with Nacht is gradual and not very standard. But it still brings you two ever so close together. Genre: romance Word count: ~1800 A/N: This is a female reader, though female pronouns only come up, like, twice.

..........

“Tch, what a mess…” Nacht groaned after he walked into the base.

The scene he came across was the common area having turned into a war zone. It was a mess of broken furniture and spells being thrown across the room. The usual suspects of Magna, Luck, and Gauche were at play along with Vanessa, Zora, and Noelle. It appeared that there had been an especially nasty disagreement.

“These people really are no better, even after becoming the kingdom’s second ranked squad.”

“Quit giving commentary like anyone here cares about your opinion, vice bastard.”

Nacht turned his head in the direction of the voice. His eyes landed on you, leaning against the wall and glaring at him. Your presence made him tense the slightest bit.

The rest of the squad hesitated to interact with him. But not you. Even if you weren’t friendly with him, the fact that you approached him at all was something he appreciated. But because of your aggression, he was at a loss for how to reply.

Every time. Even now.

“If you really don’t want to bother with us, just quit the squad already,” you remarked before you walked past him and through the chaos, completely unaffected by it.

“Master Nacht… You’re staring at her again…” Plumede whispered in the back of Nacht’s mind.

“Yes. I know,” he said. Nacht felt like an utter fool. Why did his heart race with excitement from your glare? Why did he want to be nearer to you when you clearly resented him?

…

“Thanks for getting our order,” you said while handing payment over to the shopkeeper. You received the parcel and turned to Nacht.

His arms were full with bags of goods that you two picked up for the rest of the squad so he extended one of the less filled bags for you to slip the package into.

“I never expected you to be okay with being used as a pack mule,” you remarked as the two of you walked away.

“I only agreed to accompany you on the shopping trip. I never said I was okay with this kind of treatment,” Nacht replied.

“Yet you haven’t complained about carrying everything.” You quirked a brow in Nacht’s direction but all you got back from him was the same empty smile that he usually wore. You found it a shame that a pretty face like his didn’t express much emotion. “But now that we’ve picked up everything, we can head back.”

“We came by broom, but how about I transport us back with my Shadow Magic? It’s sure to be quicker,” offered Nacht and you immediately blanched.

“Hell no. I’m not getting sucked into that creepy void of yours,” you retorted.

It wasn’t that you didn’t trust Nacht or his magic. Okay, maybe it was a lack of trust. But after Nacht’s harsh behavior early on, putting your faith in his good will didn’t come easily. Plus, you considered yourself to be Nacht’s biggest critic in the squad. There was no way you were about to be buttered up.

“Alright then. I thought to ask instead of merely whisking you away without permission. And since you’ve declined…” Nacht veered from your side and into the shadows of an alleyway. “I’ll see you at the base then.”

“Huh? Where are you—?”

“Good day.” And Nacht was gone.

You blinked.

A part of you wanted to scream at his abandonment of you. Another part wanted to laugh because of the absurdity. And yet a third part wanted to stop and appreciate how he’d, somewhat clumsily, tried to be polite to you.

“He…” You placed your hands over your face, which felt warmer than usual. “He kinda sucks at being nice.”

…

Nacht put his signature at the end of a mission report then put it into a file with the rest of the paperwork that would be delivered to the Magic Knight Headquarters later that day.

The door opened and Nacht lifted his head to see who it was.

His heart skipped a beat upon seeing you enter, a tray of food in hand.

“I noticed you weren’t there for lunch,” you said by way of explanation.

“Lunch?” Nacht checked his clock and, indeed, it was long past the usual hour for lunch. “Ah…” He turned back to you. “Thank you for thinking of me.”

“We need to keep you fed and alive if we want any paperwork done around here,” you joked while placing the tray down. Due to your closeness, Nacht was able to make out a faint blush on your cheeks. Your eyes flicked in his direction. “What are you staring at, shadow stalker?”

“You’re hovering quite close,” Nacht coolly answered as he averted his eyes. “I couldn’t help it if you drew my attention.”

“Ha! Like I’d ever go out with you. I have a strict ‘no assholes’ policy when it comes to my dating pool,” you said with a wry grin.

Nacht raised a brow at your reply.

“First off, you realize that everyone has an anus so your pol—”

You smacked Nacht’s shoulder. Though it was clear from your bit back smile that you did find his remark funny.

“Since when did you know how to tell a joke?”

“I’m a man of secrets and surprises,” Nacht replied. “Secondly…” He rose from his seat and walked around his desk to you. “It’s awfully presumptuous to think I was staring at you with romantic intentions.”

“Uhp—!” You choked up and your flush darkened.

Feeling bolder than usual, Nacht placed his hand under your chin and coaxed you into looking up at him.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were the one who had an interest in me.”

Nacht’s heart fluttered at the idea of you liking him back. He wasn’t about to get his hopes up, not with the way you still threw insults and sarcasm at him on a daily basis. But he wanted to pretend.

You stayed silent for a moment, staring into Nacht’s eyes. It was cute, the wide-eyed look on your face. But Nacht also worried about what was running through your head. So he prompted you again.

“Well? Have anything to say for yourself?”

“Your cologne smells nice…”

Nacht blinked. “What?”

You blinked. “What?”

“You… pay attention to the way I smell?” Nacht felt his face heat up rapidly.

At that, your own face paled.

“What?! Shut up!” You yelled while stepping away from Nacht. “I’m not some creep! I just—! I just have a good nose! Shut up!”

You hurried out the door and your heavy footsteps were heard fleeing for a while.

Nacht blinked a few more times.

I don’t wear cologne, he thought. Then he grimaced. Oh gods, do I smell of something else? He raised his wrist to his nose. I probably can’t tell if I stink. I’d have to ask someone else.

“She was probably talking about your natural, masculine musk, Master,” Gimodelo said.

“I doubt it.”

Nacht touched a hand to his chest and tried to will his heart to calm down.

…

The Black Bulls were celebrating a day off, complete with alcohol and games once night had fallen. On Vanessa’s insistence, one of the games was 7 Minutes in Heaven with the choosing method being drawing lots.

You stared at the “1” drawn onto the stick you’d drawn. Meaning you’d be going first along with the person who’d drawn the other “1.”

“Alright, so who did I match with?” you questioned the group while showing your stick.

You scanned the group. Vanessa and Zora were already paired. Luck pumped a fist as he exclaimed how he and Magna had been paired off. Where was your partn—?

The second “1” stick was tapped against yours.

“I believe this means we’ve been paired off.”

Your heart leapt to your throat and you felt lightheaded as all blood rushed to your face.

Why him?! You were still recovering from your conversation in Nacht’s office the other day. And now you were supposed to be locked in a closet with Nacht for seven whole minutes? This is torture!

You shuffled into the closet with Nacht and plopped yourself on the floor without much care. It’s not like you had much dignity to bring into the situation.

After a few seconds, Nacht sat down beside you and you instinctively scooted to give him space.

“Don’t worry, we don’t have to kiss if you don’t want to,” Nacht whispered and you swore he sounded hurt.

The problem is that I actually do want to kiss you! You kept the thought to yourself, unable to think of a way to put it more… normally.

“Since we’re in here though, I’d like to make a confession.”

You dared to glance in Nacht’s direction but immediately looked away when you saw his bright red flush and the faint, relaxed smile on his face. It was an entirely different look to him and you feared your heart might burst because of how handsome he looked.

“I might sound ridiculous but I’ve liked you for a while now. You were critical of me and yet I was okay with it. Because you were right with how… flawed I acted at times. I like how unafraid and upfront you are without being reckless. And I’m glad we’ve grown closer so to speak and joke with each other a bit. It might sound strange but it’s true.”

At that point, you felt a firm thumping in your chest and your head getting light from the many beats your heart had skipped.

It was more than shocking to learn that Nacht had started loving you before you’d learned to go easy on him. Then again, you had started falling for him when he was still being distant and aloof.

Love worked in mysterious ways, you supposed.

You felt Nacht’s hand on your cheek so you faced him. Nacht smiled at you with a genuine grin full of warmth.

“I like you. I hope you’re okay with me saying that.”

“Nacht…” You finally found your voice. “It’s okay. I… like you too…”

The words hung in the air for the longest moment of your life.

You and Nacht… Alone in that small space…

Nacht cupped your other cheek, his hands were cold but soft against your skin, and leaned down closer to you. You fully turned your body toward him and placed your hands on his shoulders.

Then, your lips met Nacht’s.

The kiss was slow and soft. Neither of you were too eager, but neither of you were too afraid.

For a moment, you two were in sync.

And hopefully that one moment would become many more in the future.

[catmask]

sometimes while i think about that while a lot of adults did not treat me very well as a kid i also get a lot of 'in hindsight this person was so good to me and i didnt even realize it until now' as an adult. today i was thinking about how the first anime convention i ever went to was when i was 10 and i asked the man working the manga cafe what manga was/what a good place to start was (because the con was very overstimulating for me and i had gotten lost) and he asked how old i was before recommending yotsuba and asking if i wanted any water or something to eat. its really simple but theres a lot of bad things that couldve happened or he could've been careless in his recommendation, but instead yotsuba has remained one of my favorite manga for years, and probably a large portion of why i continue to read manga as an adult... i think adults who try to involve kids in the world safely/kindly even in little ways make so much more of a difference than they ever really know.

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

Plain-text version:

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[barksbog]

panther chameleon plushies!!!

based on the Amilobe locality of Furcifer pardalis

magnetic little hands for to grab things

soft

funny eyes

doesn´t need high humidty or complex care!

teddy joints for to move their little legs

---

adopt one from my bog

barks-bog.com

[stump-not-found]

he's being normal about hands

[nova-rpv]

a redraw of the first drawing i posted here to celebrate the fact that ive been in tumblr for more than a whole year posting my shit and havent deleted my blog in panic yippee \:D/ (mushy rant in tags)

[ratbastarddotfuck]

if you're a white person taking pleasure in the idea that Trump voters of colour are experiencing racist violence from white trumpers because "they got what's coming to them" I don't think you're anti-racist at all, I think you were just waiting for an acceptable target, and you're also fucking weird.

Bad Person Deserves Punishment For Their Sins give me a fucking break and get yourself out of the fucking catholic church. you're all prison abolitionists until you see someone you don't like.

[swampybogg]

[vaguely-concerned]

the more I play the more I think lucanis basically knows it's illario who betrayed him right from the beginning (he's had a year in the ossuary to think. not that many people knew where he was going. when you ask him 'did Illario know you'd be on that ship' his only answer is the hardest flattest 'yes' you ever heard). so it's not so much about figuring out who the traitor is (because that's ludicrous. we all know. immediately. they didn't really bother to hide it lmao) as about methodically closing off every single avenue of denial lucanis has clung to that whole time with as much or little gentleness as you might prefer until he has no choice but to admit it. because the moment he has to admit it, he'll have to do something -- feel something -- about it. and that's such a catastrophic event in lucanis' inner landscape (he has had TWO people in this whole entire world up until now and will do anything to hold on to them with a heartbreaking child-like desperation, even at and especially through the detriment of his own self) that he'd rather just. not. what if we quite simply. didn't. what if we just stayed here in the emptiness where we can both pretend you didn't hurt me in a way I should never forgive. I have so much practice in that with caterina already it's always worked out great for everyone so far. (press x to fucking doubt but that's trauma logic for you lol)

after everything illario did, so much of the storm of lucanis' emotions around it is 'what the FUCK did you get yourself tangled up in this time and how do I get you out of this mess safely'. what's worse: the fact that your brother murdered you, or that he put himself in horrible danger doing so and thus exposed you to the risk of losing him forever. lucanis' heart certainly has an opinion here and it's fucking unhinged (affectionate)

the themes of dissociation in lucanis' character in general makes me feel nuts. allllll these contradictory messy things he needs to cut off from each other because they can't coexist or be easily reconciled inside him. but all remain stubbornly true separately anyway and will have their due one day. love and resentment. tenderness and fear and rage. terror and longing. love and freedom don't coexist. the burned out golden child anthem is playing in the background. he was always caterina's favourite and he has to keep striving to deserve that dubious honour with every breath he takes and then, presumably, mercifully, some day he will die and be excused and can rest. and until now he's suppressed all the -- natural, healthy, protective! -- negative feelings that threaten the few attachment relationships he actually has, at the cost of ever actually having his needs for connection and safety met and leaving his core self imprisoned and compromised. and spite goes 'what. no. that's dumb fuck that' (*spite voice* I do not understand that and even if I did I would not respect it) and does not allow him to fall back into that, which I think is what saves his life, ultimately. it took being possessed by a demon for lucanis to even contemplate telling anyone he loves 'no' in any way, but hey. whatever gets you there right lol

lucanis is dealing with the freeze response allll the way down baby. and he was even before the ossuary, that just turbo powered it and brought it to a breaking point way before it could happen naturally. but something was going to break eventually no matter what, and I'm just glad that in the end, through the power of friendship and also pure spite, it doesn't have to be him

[egophiliac]

I know we're not on the Hearts chapter but, I have a feeling the SSR will be Cater? But also him having the tear animation, since I have a feeling his dream will be a bit like Ruggie's q-q

I'm leaning towards either Cater or Ace, personally! Trey and Deuce have kinda already had their character arcs -- though someone else did mention to me that they thought it might be Trey, because so far all the vices have gotten one. though that might just be coincidence. we'll find out I guess!

my red-string-on-corkboard theory is that Ace is gonna get his arc + UM during whatever goes down with Grim, so while I could be completely wrong, I think it'd be nice if it were Cater's time to shine! ...also I am VERY curious as to what his dream is gonna be. 👀 like, I don't think he's gonna be all angsty or anything, he's a pretty cheery guy even though he pretends to be more vapid than he is, but...what would he be like if he were less. y'know.

(also I kind of want him to get the focus just because I think it'd be a shame if all he got was a super-quick 'oh his dream is to have a billion followers or whatever, now let's go on to the next person'. c'mon Twst. give him some love.)

[tapakah0]

[teaboot]

tranny freak :)

[pigeonkill-pile]

Squirrelflight Squirrelstar

[kaiserouo]

"Huh."

[fear-no-mort]

favourite thing: his new habit of saying uhuh/mhm and also this

[hoshiina]

pairing: hoshina soushirou x gn!reader (no prns)

summary: he still dreams of you and wishes for another chance to make you his, some lines are inspired by hakujitsu by king gnu

warnings: reader is rather lively/bubbly,

notes: TYSM FOR 100 !!!, a/n (yapping) in tags

wc: 1800

Hoshina Soushirou still dreamt of you. Every once in a while, you’d come to visit him in his sleep and it would make him believe that a miracle had occurred, that he had another chance. Every time, he would tell himself that he would never let this go, that he would give it his absolute all this time.

Yet, every time, he would wake up from this dream.

And every time, he would feel his heart drop at the realization of that. He was disappointed, and he knew, but there was no reason to be. It wasn't like anything had happened between the two of you. He liked to believe there was something going on— something more than mere acquaintances or friends, but he knew there wasn't. It must've been all in his head because the last time he had heard of you was before you were moved to the first division. He hadn't heard a single word from you since then, nor has he said anything— but that was just the way it was. There was nothing to do at this point anyway.

He wasn’t with you for all that long, and it was probably just the fact that both of you joined at the same time that naturally started the first conversation. He was far more weary of everything and far less cheerful at the time, and you didn't even work with him most of the time being a researcher, but you didn’t mind that one bit. If you had something you wanted to say, you would tell him and he’d just have to listen. At first, he had no idea why you kept talking to him when he paid hardly any mind, but after a while, he found comfort in your conversations. He had started to look forward to talking to you.

It had only been a few months before the defense force noticed how spectacular your work was and quickly called you over to the first division. There wasn’t a tearful farewell, or even a casual goodbye for that matter. You disappeared along with a cheerful ‘I’ll see you around!’ while you were moving your boxes out and he would hear those words ring in his head for the years to come— in your voice. Yet, at the time, all he could do was force a smile and nod.

It had been so many years since you had moved, he didn’t even know what you looked like now. Probably still stunning. Definitely still stunning. Although he had the chance to see the 1st division officers a lot, you were a researcher who worked behind the scenes. Naturally, there was no reason he'd bump into you, and he didn’t. He never did.

He loved to remember you, but he hated to think about you. He loved to remember the way you would laugh at his silly jokes, the way you would ramble on about the work you had to do daily but would still put in your all, and the way you would always visit him with some cold tea when he trained late into the night if you were still up as well. Actually, he hated thinking about the tea— it would make him start thinking about you. He would think about how you were now, if you were still pilled with work, and if you remembered him.

If he bumped into you, would you remember his name? Maybe if he cracked a lame joke. Maybe if he gave you a few days to think about it. Maybe if he started listing the things you talked about— his most treasured memories. Maybe then you’d say his name again.

See? This is why he hated thinking about you— he had things to be doing.

It wasn't like this happened everyday and it wasn't that big of a deal. It just ruined his day a little when it did happen. So if he had to say, he hated dreaming of you.

As you took over his thoughts again, the emergency alarm started to buzz, as if to tell him to snap out of it. He was thankful, he couldn't still be daydreaming like this.

A smaller-sized identified grade kaiju had appeared near the first division quarters, so the third division was doing more backup work this time. Hoshina was taking care of the smaller kaiju in the vicinity that had spawned from the presence of the honju. It felt nice for him to be doing work, it took his mind off his ramblings and cleared his head. He wasn't too worried about the honju, however. Although it was an identified grade, it wasn't anything they hadn't dealt with before and as much as he liked to tease Narumi about how he was always better at smaller kaiju neutralization, he knew Narumi was extraordinary at what he did.

At least that would have been true for any other kaiju of that size and strength, but Narumi seemed to be struggling far more than expected with this one. From his earpiece, he heard Okonogi notify him that the 1st division was asking to send Narumi some help if possible, and he immediately rushed over.

Yet, by the time he got there, Narumi had already neutralized the kaiju in question, although horribly beat up.

“I don't need your help, Hoshina!” Narumi still managed to yell while on the floor, absolutely bleeding out.

“Oh, shut up, do you want to die?” Hoshina asked. It didn't take an expert to see that Narumi’s condition was concerning.

Narumi soon fell quiet, probably unconscious, while Hoshina found his earpiece lying on the floor near him. He picked it up, hoping it'd connect to the first division just in case they had lost connection to his vitals.

“He's unconscious right now, but he seems to still be breathing. However, he's bleeding dangerously from multiple spots. I think a few ribs might also be broken,” Hoshina said. “There aren't any kaiju nearby at the moment and I'll take care of them if any do come— bring the stretcher right away.”

He waited a moment, but there was no response from the earpiece.

“Hello?” he asked, hoping for a response. After another moment, he heard it.

“Hoshina…?”

It was you. He would still recognize your voice from anywhere. Oh, how he missed you. His eyes were wide and he had nothing to say all of a sudden. You remembered him. You recognized his voice.

You remembered his name.

“Thank you for your report, we lost connection to some of his vitals halfway through. The medics should be there in a few minutes,” you said.

“I'll stand by,” Hoshina said and kept Narumi's earpiece in his ear. He had nothing he wanted to tell you, not one thing in mind, but he wanted to be on the line with you— even in silence. The medics came in a few minutes like you had told him and took care of Narumi right away.

“They got here, he should be fine now,” Hoshina said, as if you didn't already know. He just wanted something to say to you.

“I missed working with you,” you said and he couldn't believe his ears. Perhaps he'd wake up from this dream again. Perhaps he'd open his eyes and be utterly disappointed again. But he knew there wasn't even a hint of romantic affection in your words, just the respect you've always had for the work he did, and how you missed doing this job with him. And he did too.

“Yeah, I did too,” he said. “I still do.”

You chuckled a little and he could still picture you smiling. “That made my entire year,” you said. “Probably not the time for this, but we should catch up sometime. If you don't mind, of course.”

Made your year. What did you mean by that? And If he didn't mind? Oh, you didn't know how many times he's dreamed of this day.

“I'd love to,” he said. While he was a little embarrassed to imagine the rest of the first-division team hearing this conversation, that was not going to stop him. He'd be an absolute fool to let this chance go. He has promised himself to give it his all this time.

“Are you seeing anyone?” he asked quietly.

“Sorry?” you asked, hoping he'd repeat that. You heard it, but you were afraid you were so delusional you were starting to hear things. Your heartbeat quickened and you waited patiently, hoping it wasn't all in your head.

“Do you have a lover?” he asked a little more clearly, but obviously still nervous and flustered. You had never seen him like this, ever.

“No,” you replied, a little too quickly. “I do not.”

Relief washed over him and he felt his heartbeat quicken. Oh, thank goodness you didn't have access to his vitals. He was going to make you fall for him somehow.

“…do you?” you asked quietly, after a moment.

“Me?” he asked. “No, I don't.”

“I see,” you said, but he could hear the soft delight in your voice. He would never miss it.

Perhaps he'd just go for it. There was nothing for him to lose at this point, and he had made his feelings plenty obvious already. If you didn't want him, he'd just try again. He's tried countless times in his dreams already, what's a few more?

“But I'd love to be yours,” he said and heard you gasp quietly. That one he couldn't read. Was that a little too bold? Far too sudden?

“Did I hear that right?” he faintly heard you scream, asking your fellow first division coworkers. That made him laugh, you hadn't changed one bit. “I’ve loved you forever, Hoshina.”

There was absolutely no way. He was going to wake up soon, he just knew it. Well, might as well indulge in the dream for now, then.

“I've definitely loved you for longer,” he said.

“Hoshina, I'm going to kill you if this is a dream,” you said, and that caught him off guard. Yet, even that sounded nice to him, and that made him smile. He'd get to see you, at least.

But it wasn't a dream. The way your voice fluttered his heart could never be felt through a dream. The way your laugh filled his soul could not possibly make him feel so warm through a mere dream.

“I cannot wait to see you,” you said softly, your voice so full of love it made him melt.

He couldn't either, but that wasn't exactly what he had on mind this entire time.

“And I cannot wait to kiss you.”