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boydepartment · 1 year ago

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I'm sorry, I'm late- Hwang Hyunjin (oneshot version)

Description: Y/n is a student teacher in a small town in France. Hwang Hyunjin is an idol who decided to run away after trouble started to arise again. He finds himself in the class where she helps, quickly they peaked each other’s interests. Both of them ran from something and it landed them in this small town in the middle of practically nowhere. One thing they both know is that the past always catches up and it is only a matter of time, so they better make the most of it.

Warnings: cursing, maybe a touch of dark subjects. There is French in this story, I am currently studying the language and I am not an expert. If you happen to speak the language and notice a mistake, please tell me! I am happy to learn and correct myself!

a/n- this is a really old story i wrote a few months ago, and i still think about it, so i decided to compile all the chapters into one whole story. i always reread this story too IDK i cleaned it up a little too

wc- 25k ? MASTERLIST

Chapter 1: His eyes

You sat up slowly, feeling the sun through your thin curtains. Your body felt refreshed, oddly enough. Looking over at the clock on your wall you hopped up.

You were late to class! You ran to the wardrobe to get a quick outfit. Throwing on some old clothes the ever so kind old lady, Gram, across the street gave you when you first moved here as a housewarming present. She also made you her special pasta, the thought made your mouth water, but you didn’t have time to relish that thought. You rushed to your bathroom washing up to look presentable enough to be running around a classroom helping the teacher. You grabbed your flats which were by the door and threw your book bag over your shoulder. Feet out you started running down the worn old street.

“Morning Y/n!” One of your neighbors yelled from across the way. You mustered a morning as you kept running. You could not be late! That would look unprofessional! You started to see the town in the distance and took a second to breathe. What time was it now? You dug through your bag and found the watch you bought from the general store. 7:45am.

Alright! Finally slipping your flats on you took note to remind yourself to take a bath when you got home, especially since you ran barefoot all that way. You started to run again down the hill not noticing the person at the bottom. You ran straight into him, your bag swinging around you.

“DÉSOLÉ! JE SUIS EN RETARD! (Sorry, I am late)” You yelled and kept running. Normally you learned not to apologize much here, but you really rammed into him.

However, it was worth it! You got to the small classroom in the tiny-tiny school in time.

“Bonjour, Y/n. (good morning, Y/n)” Your higher up greeted you. You greeted him back with a nod and sat down in your desk which was sat by his. You were learning how to teach art here. Since the teacher was getting old and Mr. W noticed that you weren’t one of the young people to just leave the small French town after his semester class, he decided to take you under his wing. He would tell you how to thoroughly teach an art class, as well as help you with your French. For the most part a lot of people in town would cut you some slack, they pretty much picked up that you were young and at least trying to speak to them as much as you possibly could.

The classroom started to fill with young adults, it was the usual class, until someone who wasn’t ordinary showed up. It was the guy you rammed into at the end of the hill. The more you looked at him the more he stood out to you. His hair was chopped horribly, and his clothes had what you assumed to be the logos removed. You have read an abundance of true crime books in your youth so to say this man didn’t raise all the red flags would be a lie. He didn’t look like he would harm anyone though, that is what truly through you off about him. He looked like a scared ally dog.

Eventually you got tasked to clean up the brushes from last class, you quickly got up and went to the broken-down sink at the back of the room. You let them soak and you listened to the head teacher guide the class through the lesson. Soon that will be you leading the class, you couldn’t wait. Mr. W really knew how to captivate the learning starving artists, soon everyone was working as the record player near his desk started to play famous classical pieces. Your eyes drifted to the young man in the corner, once again catching your interests. You watched as he deliberately and carefully let the small delicate brush hit the thick paper. The sun hit him beautifully and you started to notice little details about him. Then he made eye contact with you, and you quickly went back to soaking and cleaning the brushes, you even went as far as cleaning various old materials used earlier on in the week.

As much as you tried to get your mind off him, you couldn’t. Huffing you grabbed a stool and sat next to him. He looked at you with a terrified look, he looked as if you caught him sneaking a cookie from the cookie jar before dinner.

“You’re new here, I ran into you…” You mumbled and kept looking at him, he looked down quickly at his work.

“I- yeah. It’s okay…” The young man went back to his painting.

“Do you speak French?” You watched his line work again; his eyes watched the brush intently.

“Very little, I have visited Paris many times, but I don’t stay long.”

You let out a small huff of a laugh, “Paris is quite far from here.” This caught his attention and he looked at you.

“Good.” He said softly then turned back. You two have been talking in a soft tone due to people around you trying to focus.

You decided to keep talking, “did you just move here? I haven’t seen you around.”

“Yes, a couple weeks ago. I was at the Inn until I moved into the neighborhood above the hill.” He dipped his brush in the paint again and kept the steady hold.

“You live in the same neighborhood as me.” You said, “you’re also mainly a landscape artist.”

The man looked stunned, and he dropped the brush, “how can you tell?”

“The way your lines are deliberate, you’re calculating in your head instead of feeling out the page and medium emotionally.” You said and made eye contact with him; he was a total mystery to you. After living in this town a couple of years, you learned about almost everyone. The town only sometimes got any new visitors until this guy just showed up.

“You can pick up on that?” The man spoke softly, he seemed to walk on eggshells around you. Did you hurt his feelings? There was nothing wrong with deliberate and calculated lines.

“Yes, mainly because I wish I could do that in my art.”

He picked up the brush again and dabbed it on the paper, “what mediums and styles do you work in?”

“Portrait and abstract. For portrait I work in charcoal and watercolor, for abstract I work in all different types of stuff I can get my hands on.” You spoke softly. When a ghost of a smile graced his features, you almost felt your heart stop and you didn’t know why.

“I hate working in charcoal and abstract.” His eyes followed his brush strokes again.

“Which house do you live in?” You asked him.

He smiled again, “you ask a lot of questions.”

“We haven’t had someone new actually move in since I moved in.” You quickly answered back.

The man acknowledged your statement, “the one with the dead rosebush in the front.”

“It’s not dead forever!” You said rather defensively, mainly because you live right next to this house which you thought was vacant still, “it just needs some help.”

“Ah so you know the house I live in?” He picked up a thicker brush.

“Yes, you’re my neighbor. It is a small neighborhood in a small town. Also why is-“ you were going to ask him about his hair when Mr. W called you by his desk. You excused yourself and walked over. He ended up tasking you to clean up the chalkboard, something about his arm hurting him. If you translated that correctly.

As you cleaned up the old-fashioned school board you felt eyes on you, you knew they were the mysterious stranger’s.

Well, your mysterious neighbor.

After the class was dismissed, you helped clean up for the day and Mr. W excused you. When you grabbed your bag and walked out of the classroom you saw the mysterious stranger again. He saw you and you noticed he got nervous again.

This guy was very odd.

You approached him, “you can go home now.”

“You wanted to ask me something though.” He said and you two walked out of the school building. You looked up at him trying to remember what on Earth you were going to ask him earlier. You pouted a bit trying to remember.

“If you don’t remember then I live next door.” The man said, he went to turn to the direction of the neighborhood, and you stopped him again.

“Wait, what’s your name?” You had grabbed onto his sleeve. His lean figure whipped around.

“Hwang Hyunjin.” Part of his expression told you he was nervous to say this, but still answered you.

“Can I give you a nickname to help me remember?” There was no way you wanted to forget his name let alone accidentally pronounce it wrong. Between speaking English and now heavily studying French, sometimes your pronunciations could get a little wonky.

You saw him smile warmly at you, “Sometimes people would call me Jinnie.”

Jinnie… How cute.

You nodded and repeated it then introduced yourself, “I am Y/n. Y/n L/n.” You put your paint-stained hand out for him to shake. He gladly took your hand and shook it. His hand was quite larger than yours and the next thing you knew he turned away and waved. You stood there dumbfounded, this man, Jinnie, was odd. But he was interesting and young like you. Part of you felt like you had to help him, no one really helped you when you moved to town. You didn’t want this man to go through that too. You made up your mind, you would show up at his door tomorrow and walk to school with him.

Your feet made their way to the heart of the small town, you greeted the locals, they were now kind to you and warm. You belonged here now to them. It was a foreign feeling, being a part of a community that was kind to you. Walking into the bookstore where you help part time you were greeted by your coworker.

“Ah… Vous n'avez qu'à balayer le plancher. (I need you to sweep the floor)” She didn’t always give you tasks like this, most of the time it was restocking shelves or working the counter. However, you didn’t mind sweeping the floor. You nodded and went to the back room to retrieve the broom and dustpan. Everything was older and you thrived in this environment. You could be doing nothing at all, or cleaning, and you are happy. You loved it here. Maybe you romanticized a little too much though. The thought made you smile to yourself. After your sweeping your boss had you tidy up some shelves.

“Um, Y/n!” She peeked her head in from one of the shelves, “A demain(see you tomorrow)??”

“Oui. (yes)” You said simply, you planned on popping in tomorrow after school anyways, if she wanted you to help out too, you would gladly do so. You saw her smile at you then nod, walking off to other tasks. Once you were done you said your goodbyes and started to walk back home. Your little neighborhood wasn’t far from the town. Part of you felt excitement bubble up in you, remembering your new neighbor.

When you walked up the hill it was already nighttime, you honestly think you should start carrying a walking stick especially because it was a pretty empty field surrounding the small jumble of brick homes. The trees didn’t start until the back of the neighborhood. You never went that way though. Whenever you walked into the beaten path you found yourself once again becoming happy, seeing someone new here really greatened your appreciation for this town. You wondered if Jinnie had the same appreciation as you.

You unlocked your small house which you would be lying if you said it wasn’t some little cottage. You decorated it the past two years like that on purpose. Kicking off your flats you remembered how dirty your feet were. Letting out a small laugh, you walked towards the bathroom and drew yourself a bath. As you waited for the water to fill, you made yourself some tea. It was dark out now and you felt it would be a great way to end your night. As you washed your hands in the sink, you had a perfect view of your neighbor’s living room. You didn’t want to be creepy, so you closed the curtains, but not before taking note of how peaceful he looked reading a book that clearly enthralled him. Your heart pounded and next thing you heard was the kettle whistling. Quickly shaken out of your thoughts you waited to pour yourself a cup and head back to the bathroom.

Slipping into your nightgown which was yet another gift from your birthday last year from the kind lady across the way. She wanted to always repay you for bringing her your homemade pumpkin bread once every other week. She was your first friend here. You went under your covers and made sure your alarm clock was on this time. You had to get up a little early anyways, you wanted to walk with Jinnie to school.

~+~

Shockingly, your alarm did wake you up. Excitedly you hurried to get ready, your feet pitter pattered to the wardrobe. You grabbed a dress and another sweater; you were always one for layering even if summer was quickly coming. That means you would have another year of student-teaching experience under your belt. It also meant you would spend more time at the bookstore soon, which made excitement bubble in your stomach. You walked to the bathroom and once again got washed up for the day. Teeth, hair, the homemade lip balm you made yourself, all done!

You slipped your socks and boots on, today felt like a boots day. The breakfast menu was some fruit and toast, you really had to pick up more food soon at the market. Maybe you would go in a couple days on Sunday, the town always had merchants come in and it was outdoor. You nodded to yourself and finished eating. Grabbing your bag you headed to the neighbor’s home, the one with the sad rosebush.

To say you were a little nervous would be a lie, you weren’t used to being the one to almost chase after someone, but Jinnie intrigued you. You knocked a couple times and he answered, seemingly already dressed.

“Good morning, Y/n.” His voice was soft. Jinnie’s eyes looked tired.

“Good morning Jinnie, do you want to walk with me to the school?” You really hoped he would say yes, he could be the only friend you have that was actually your age. Jinnie smiled down at you.

“I would love to actually, let me grab my things.” He went to shut the door but then opened it, “you can come in.”

You took up his offer and decided to look around the house, it had been vacant since you had moved in. But it surely didn’t look like it got worn over time. You saw how he had already had stuff hung up, his art which looked recent, there was no sign of dust stains.

“I have been painting a lot since I moved here.” He said now next to you, you nodded slowly.

“I see most of them are of the town.” You noted, you recognized the general store and the fountain in the middle of town.

Jinnie hummed, “I used to paint flowers a lot, sometimes people or still lifes. But after moving here I have been inspired by the architecture.”

You finally got a look at his clothes, “you are wearing normal clothes today. No torn off logos.”

His brows furrowed, “you take note of everything don’t you? Our neighbor across the street gave me these. Said I was her old husband’s size.”

“She did the same for me too.” You smiled at the memory, “if you want to thank her, I bake her bread once every other week. You can join me.”

His eyes, which were once tired, lit up, “I love bread.”

“We will have to make extra then.”

After you talked about the pumpkin bread recipe you two started your walk to the school, the sun now just rising over the town.

“It is hard to not romanticize this town.” He suddenly spoke, “although the people here sometimes act like they hate me.”

You let out a small huff of a laugh, “they do that to newcomers, if you want, I can help teach you some basic phrases. It will help them warm up to you more.”

“You would do that?” Jinnie asked you, the cool spring breeze brushing through his hair.

“Yes, in exchange that you help me with landscape art.” You said and put your hand out again, to shake on it.

“Deal.” This time he actually grinned and shook your hand. You saw his toothy grin for the first time that morning. This man was dangerously charming.

You really couldn’t help the small glances you two would exchange during class, the small smiles, everything. He was an instant click for you. However, you didn’t let him distract you from your work, Mr. W would kill you if he found out you were getting distracted by some random boy. You started to study the art history books Mr. W assigned for you to take notes on, he always said if you wanted to teach a subject you had to know the history behind it. Your favorite artists were all landscape-based artists, mainly because you couldn’t do it. Your art was either the small details of people’s faces, or complete disordered abstract. Your mind once again wandered to Jinnie who was now cleaning his brushes, his art study on the town that was hung up by the door of his home was almost perfect in a way. You wondered how Jinnie himself just did that.

After the class, you picked up your history books and thanked Mr. W. Since it was Friday you wouldn’t see him until Monday, unless he called your landline asking you to come in. When you walked out you saw Jinnie waiting there for you once more.

“Mr. W really knows how to capture the attention of students.” Jinnie spoke and held the door open for you. You walked out and waited for him this time.

“I am very thankful to be able to learn from him, he wants me to take his teaching position when he is ready to retire.” Your bag swung a bit when you flipped around to face him.

“You are very welcoming; I am sure you will be a good teacher.” Jinnie said, you two walked down the dirt path, almost to where the crossroad was.

“Thank you,” you smiled at him, “I have to go to work… Which is in town…” You weren’t very good at goodbyes or see you laters.

“I can bring you dinner tonight if you want, I mean you are helping me out with getting settled here. It’s the least I can do.” You two now stood at the crossroads.

“I get home sort of late… Tomorrow though would be better, since I work in the morning and will be done by the afternoon.” You offered, you were curious to how good his cooking is, and you would never pass up on a free meal.

“Alright, Saturday evening, I will cook and bring over the plates.” He nodded to himself. Before you were about to say goodbye he already flipped around and waved to walk home.

Jinnie was certainly a person you wanted to figure out, you even found the urge to try and paint him in your sketchbook. That urge hasn’t happened to you since high school.

While doing your chores in the little bookstore you saw some tourists, it seemed like your little town was gaining traction and that made you nervous. You liked how it was a small place to live, under the radar. This sort of put a damper on your mood, it had you overthinking.

It kept you over thinking into the next day as well, especially because that Saturday morning more tourists came by, and it scared you. You didn’t want people here, you realized while sweeping you had no right to say that. You were once a foreigner here too. Sighing, you kept mopping the same spot over and over.

“I think it’s clean.” Someone spoke softly behind you, you turned around to see your other shop owner’s daughter, she was your second friend in town. She got you a job here with her mom in exchange of you tutoring her in English.

“I-I’m sorry. There is just a lot on my mind…” You mumbled; she turned her head in confusion.

“The recent abundance of tourists or that handsome man every girl in town is raving about?” She had a wicked grin on her face, “there are whispers about him living in the same neighborhood as you.”

You set the mop to the side, “it’s just the tourists, you know that makes me nervous and there seems to be more of them.”

She nodded, “you can head home early if you want, I need to make some extra money some of the girls in town want to make the handsome man cookies this weekend and I need to buy powdered sugar tomorrow at the market for the finishing touch.”

You thanked her and started to pack up, before you left you turned around, “oh by the way, his name is Jinnie.” You winked at her and walked out. The shop owner’s daughter felt like your sibling, although she wasn’t around often due to her schooling in the next town over. The time you spent with her you cherished. You took a deep breath then smiled to yourself, you had something to look forward to tonight and that was dinner with ‘the handsome man.’ You thought it was so cute that the girls were gossiping about him.

To thank Jinnie you stopped by the general store and picked up some flowers, that weren’t dead like the ones in his front yard.

“Y/n!” You flipped around and saw your other neighbor, the kind old lady, Gram. You grinned at her; you had already paid for the flowers, so you went over to her.

“How are you, Gram?” It was nice to see her out and about.

“Well, I made friends with your next-door neighbor, Hyunjin.” She said and put stuff in her basket. You decided to walk with her and help her with her shopping.

“Did you?” You asked and got something from the shelf she pointed to. Gram let out a small hum.

“Yes, and I found out stuff about him for you.” She spoke slyly.

You laughed a tiny bit, “oh really?”

Gram let out a huff and nodded, “yes, he is a few months older than you. He traveled a lot, and he used to sing.”

“That’s new information to me.” You mumbled to yourself.

“I can’t hear you when you mumble.” Gram said back.

You apologized quickly and repeated yourself again.

“There is a lot of things I feel you two could learn from each other.”

Your brows furrowed and pondered what she could mean by that. It was quite an odd thing to say but then again, she was odd herself. You helped your neighbor with the rest of her groceries and walked her back home.

“Oh, tomorrow, Gram, I am going to the morning market, I will make pumpkin bread for you tomorrow as well, all fresh ingredients.” You said as you helped unpack her groceries in her kitchen. It was filled with old photos of her family; she also had a little collection of porcelain bunnies.

“I am so excited for that dear.” Gram spoke from her chair in the living room. You finished up and walked in her very floral living space.

“Is there anything else you need?” You asked.

“Tell Hyunjin to bring me back my recipe when he’s done with it.” Gram then waved you off.

He borrowed a recipe?

You walked across the street to your humble abode and started to get ready for dinner with Jinnie. You set the red roses down on the table then started to your bathroom. You took a quick sponge bath and tried your best to look presentable. You had thrown out all your makeup a few months after you moved here, and you didn’t want to check the chest at the foot of your bed which was locked up with your old stuff for a reason. Out of sight out of mind. You dug in your wardrobe and saw a nice floral dress and slipped it on. Tying the back you smiled, Gram had a very good fashion sense in her youth. You rummaged through the little box of sewing supplies she gave you and found ribbons, you tied your hair with them. If he was making dinner you had to look presentable. Skipping to the kitchen you dug around your cabinets; you had wine somewhere around here. It was a housewarming present from the man who sold you this home. It had to still be okay… right? You never opened it. As you were rummaging there was a knock on the door, startled you hit your head on the top of the cabinet.

“Ow…” You mumbled and wobbled up to the door. When you opened you saw Jinnie standing there with a basket in his hands, he must’ve gotten dressed up as well. He looked astronomical even with his choppy messed up hair.

“Can I come in?” He spoke, a smile gracing his features.

You stepped out of the way and let him in, “do you like red wine? I am pretty sure I have a bottle here. Somewhere.” You mumbled and he followed you into the kitchen.

“I could use a glass.” He set the basket down by the flowers. You had already resumed crouching by the cabinet, next thing you knew he was next to you helping you search.

“Oh, the flowers on the table are for you. Figured you’d want something alive.” Chuckling at your own joke you moved the olive oil.

“There it is.” Jinnie said while laughing slightly with you. He grabbed the bottle and set it on the counter, then put his hand out to help you up. You gladly took it and his soft hands held yours, then quickly let go when you were situated. Much to your dismay.

“I do love the roses; they are my favorite actually.”

The corners of your mouth curved, “we will have to nurse the bush in your yard then.”

“That we will.” He walked to the table, and you grabbed your glasses and the wine. Meeting him at the table you saw that he made pasta.

“Gram said you really liked her pasta, so I tried my best.” Jinnie said and set the table.

“I love her pasta; she made it for me when I first moved here.” You were quite surprised that he did this. You set the glasses down and poured the wine.

“So, she said.” Jinnie motioned for you to take a seat and you did, he quickly followed. You saw he was waiting for you to take a bite. When you did you swore you could cry. It tasted so good, it wasn’t quite like Gram’s however, it was still so amazing to your taste buds.

“You really- wow.” You wiped your mouth with a napkin, “this is really good.”

Jinnie grinned and took a sip of his wine, “I am so relieved, I was a little worried.”

“You shouldn’t be, this is amazing Jinnie thank you.” You took another bite then washed it down with a small sip of wine.

Jinnie started to eat his food and he looked surprised, “you weren’t just lying to make me feel better, wow.”

Him being surprised by his own cooking made you laugh, hard. He looked up at you and started to laugh.

“I thought you were just lying to be nice. Honestly.” Jinnie spoke between giggles. You kept giggling.

“Tomorrow I am going to make that pumpkin bread for Gram, I just have to go to the market in the morning.” You said and took another bite of this amazing recipe.

“May I join you? I heard the guy at the general store talk about the Sunday markets.” Jinnie asked. You nodded.

“Of course, you can come with me, I’d love that.”

The way he was so charming and thoughtful really had you entranced. Jinnie was still a mystery to you and maybe that is what made you attracted to him. Or maybe the fact he has been the only guy around your age staying in this town longer than a semester. You didn’t know, but you weren’t complaining.

Chapter 2: His laugh

“Good morning Jinnie!” You grinned as you swung open your door, the morning breeze already rushing at you.

“Good morning, Y/n. I haven’t seen you in forever.” He joked as you locked up your home, you smiled remembering the previous night. Your dinner with him. Before he had left, you helped him clean his plates and you two pretty much finished half of the wine.

You two walked down the path to town, you really liked getting to walk with him. He started to open up and talk to you little by little. You think he realized he was in the same position as you, you were the only person near his age.

“Gram said you told her you can sing, I forgot to ask you about that last night.” You said and he almost dropped his basket.

“Gram told you?” He chuckled, you two were now at the top of the hill.

“She did, I would like to hear you sing.” You said and looked at him, the sunrise warming both your bodies.

“Maybe, I prefer dancing though.” Jinnie said and turned to you.

“Dancing, singing, what else can you do?” You asked, Gram was right, he was something.

Jinnie smiled to himself, as if remembering something, “well, I can speak Korean too, some Japanese, uhhh…”

Your jaw was on the path, “and now you want to pick up French? That is very impressive.”

“Korean was my first language,” Jinnie spoke softly, the tired features washed on his face again.

“Can you show me your dancing one time?” You asked, wanting to change the subject. Jinnie once again smiled.

“I would love to.”

You two arrived at the Sunday morning market not much later then that conversation. The heart of the town was bustling, you recognized the tourists again. You looked down and then up at Jinnie when he tugged the sleeve of your sweater.

“What do we need to pick up?”

Some of the ingredients you already had at home, “we just need eggs, pumpkin puree, and cinnamon butter.” You said to him as he leaned down so he could hear you. He nodded and led you to the dairy stand. When the guy asked him what he wanted in French he started panicking and looked to you. You cleared your throat.

“Je voudrais cinq œufs, sil vous plait. (I would like five eggs please)” You said to the man, he nodded and handed you the five eggs carefully. You softly set them in Jinnie’s basket and paid for them.

“Merci! (Thank you)” You said to the merchant and continued on your way.

“Thank you.” Jinnie said down to you. You smiled up at him.

“This will be your first lesson, okay?” You grabbed him and pulled him to a bench. He sat down and you sat next to him.

“Okay I am ready.” Jinnie said, his hands still gripping the basket.

“When you ask for something, you say, ‘Je voudrais’ that directly translates to, ‘I would like.’” You explain to him, he repeated it back to you and you helped with pronunciation.

“Then right after you say what you’d like, you then end it with ‘sil vous plait’ which means ‘please.’” Once again, he repeated it back to you, you smiled.

“If you want you can even say, ‘merci,’ which is, ‘thank you.’” You further explained, “if you’re REALLY thankful, you can say, ‘merci beaucoup.’” He nodded and took note of your mini lesson.

Standing up you put your hand out instinctively, he grabbed it, and you led him to the next stand, this one had fruits. This is good practice. Plus, you wanted an orange to snack on. You led Jinnie up to the stand and he looked a little nervous. You told him how to ask for two oranges. When the guy asked him what he wants, he gulped and then spoke.

“Je voudrais…” He looked down at you, you looked up at him and squeezed his hand, “deux oranges, sil vous… plait.”

You grinned at him, you handed the man the required money and you two got your oranges.

“Jinnie that was amazing I am so proud of you.” You shook his arm that didn’t have the basket in it, in celebration.

“My pronunciation was… okay?” He looked down at you, you nodded.

“You did really well. The guy didn’t even look annoyed at you!” You giggled then continued to drag him around with you to get the other ingredients.

When you two were about to leave someone called his name, he whipped around and saw a group of five girls run up to him. You recognized one of them, it was your boss’s daughter.

“We wanted to make these for you!” One of the girls said, another girl handed him a bundle of what you assumed were the cookies. He smiled awkwardly at them.

“Ah… Merci… beaucoup!” He looked at you and you gave him a thumbs up. The group of girls started to giggle before practically running away. You heard whispers of, bel homme, and il est tres gentil. It made you laugh a bit and you two started your walk home.

“What were they saying as they were walking away?” Jinnie asked you as you opened your front gate for him. You started to laugh as you dug in your pockets for your keys.

“They were saying you were beautiful and very kind.” You saw his shocked expression and then you turned to open your door to your home.

Walking in, he set the basket down on the counter, and his gift on the table.

“Well, that was very…” He looked at you.

“Gentille.” You finished for him. Jinnie nodded and giggled then repeated what you said.

“Gentille of them.”

You started to unload the groceries, leaving the ingredients for the pumpkin bread out. You saw at the bottom of his basket he had Gram’s recipe at the bottom. You smiled to yourself.

“What can I help with?” Jinnie asked breaking you out of your thoughts.

“Could you get the bowls and stuff please?” You asked him, he nodded and started on his first task. He retrieved them in no time and soon you two were baking.

“JINNIE, CAN YOU GRAB THIS?” You wobbled your way from the back pantry where all the flours and sugars were, he quickly rushed over and grabbed the flour too, helping guide you to the kitchen.

“Okay we did it!” Jinnie said and wiped his face. You started to laugh, and he looked at you with a confused look.

“You have pumpkin puree on your face.” You reached up and wiped it off his forehead, still giggling at him.

Jinnie looked away from you, a smile on his face.

“Can you preheat the oven?” You asked as you started to mix all your ingredients. He hopped to it instantly.

Once the bread was in the oven you two found yourselves looking over the bookshelf in your room, “you have a lot of good reads.”

“Thank you.” You sat down on your bed and watched him, “I needed books to keep myself occupied when I first moved here.”

“You don’t have a phone or a laptop?” He asked and turned around, holding a book of Monet’s work and history.

“I do, they are just locked away, if someone in town wants to contact me, they can just use the landline.” You said simply.

Jinnie looked up from the book and right at you, “in that chest by your bed?”

You nodded, you didn’t look up from the book you were reading, “mhm.”

“Can I ask why they are locked away?” You felt the bed shift, he sat by your sprawled out body.

“Can I ask how you found yourself here?” You sat up now looking at him with curious eyes.

Jinnie thought for a moment, “I ran away.” He looked away from you as if he was ashamed of himself. Your features quickly softened.

“It’s… It’s okay…” You spoke, just above a whisper.

Jinnie looked at you, “I was a coward. I am a-“

“I ran away too.” You said quickly, his eyes widened, “there was a lot going on for me back home, um it became too much so I packed everything and left.”

“Y/n, I understand that more than you know.” He said and grabbed your hand.

You looked up at him, “maybe one day me and you will go more into detail about why we ran.” You stood up still holding onto his hand, “but as for right now, we have pumpkin bread to deliver.”

~+~

“You know when I was a little girl, I used to have the most beautiful blond hair.” Gram said as she sliced the bread for you and Jinnie. She insisted you two have one piece even though it was your gift to her.

“Your hair is still beautiful, Gram.” Jinnie said to her.

Gram let out a quiet laugh, “Hyunjin you are too kind…” She plated the bread and poured some iced tea for you both, and for her. Then she sat down.

“Have you ever had Y/n’s pumpkin bread?” Gram asked Jinnie. He shook his head, “you’ll love it, I remember when she first made it for me.” Gram winked at you, and you smiled bashfully. Then you three dove in. Jinnie instantly complimented your baking. Gram told you this was your best batch yet.

“I had help this time so maybe that’s why.” You smiled at Jinnie.

Gram laughed, “you better help her more if this is how good the bread is going to be!” She joked. You and Jinnie helped clean the cups and plates and she led you two to her living room.

“I want to show you guys photos in my youth.” She sat you guys on the couch and then plopped herself in the middle of you two. Gram started to talk about how after some events, her and her husband decided to move into this little town to get away. Neither of them knew a lick of French but they learned together. You could tell Jinnie was absolutely enthralled with her romantic tale. His eyes lit up and he would ask her questions, she gladly answered. It made your heart warm; he was so effortlessly charming.

At some point she wanted to take her late afternoon nap, so she kicked you two out, Jinnie walked you to your door.

“Walk with me to school tomorrow?” He asked with hopefully eyes.

“I wouldn’t miss it Jinnie.” You spoke and stood at your doorway, the warm air in contrast to the breeze outside.

“I will pick you up this time.” He said, you nodded and before you could say goodbye, just as usual he flipped around and waved. You shut the door behind you. Giggling you rushed to the bathroom, it was time to take a bath and settle down for the day. You still had to study your art history too. Oh, Jinnie just made you so giddy!

~+~

The next morning you knew you overslept because you heard knocking on your bedroom window. You groaned and rubbed your eyes, when you saw his silhouette through your curtains you hopped up and ran through your house, your slippers making you slide. Quickly, you opened the door and waved him in. Jinnie’s warm smile woke you up more.

“Uh here if you didn’t have breakfast um make something, the pantry is yours!” You ran back to your room to get ready for the day. You threw on some old pants and a t-shirt. Your hair was a mess and part of you was a little embarrassed that Jinnie saw you like this. You threw on a straw hat and jacket, almost falling over you put on your boots.

“JINNIE IS MY BAG OUT THERE!?” You yelled from your room. You heard him quickly walk around.

“YES, I GOT IT!” He spoke back. You smiled and walked out, now ready to leave and walk to school with him. When you met him by the door, he handed you your bag.

“Thank you!” You smiled and next thing you knew you two were walking to the school.

“Oh, I woke up a little early this morning, so I made sandwiches for us, if you want to eat them with me after class.” Jinnie said and showed you the wrapped sandwiches in his bag, “I also took the two oranges from your fruit bowl.”

“I will look forward to it, I shouldn’t have work today so I would love to have lunch. Especially your cooking.” Your heart felt warm around him again.

Jinnie let out a soft hum of acknowledgement, “I want to thank you by the way.”

You looked to him as you two just walked made it at the top of the hill, “why’s that?”

“Welcoming me here, you could have just let me figure it out on my own, but you haven’t.” He spoke softly, “you are letting me depend on you.”

“Well, you still have to help me with my landscape art.” You nudged him, Jinnie giggled.

“I have that planned actually; I am trying to find a nice landscape for us.”

This sort of confused you, “you don’t want to paint the town?”

“I will always paint the town, however, let’s say you get frustrated, at least you’ll have a nice view to calm you down.” He explained, “my first day here when I was still at the inn, I painted the general store, or at least tried to, and I couldn’t get it right. Then someone walked by, and it was the most beautiful view I have ever seen.”

You felt a pang of something, your stomach did flips, who captured his eye?

“Did you ever get to see your view again?” You asked, Jinnie looked down at his feet, smiling to himself.

“Almost every day actually.”

That’s odd, “do you know their name?”

“Yes.” Jinnie giggled once more.

“Do I know them?” Yes, you were nosy, you couldn’t help it.

Jinnie let out another laugh, except this time he threw his head back then looked at you, “yes you know them.”

You started to ponder as you two walked up to the school, “wait what’s their name?”

“Y/n.” Jinnie opened the door for you, and you walked in, then spun around.

“Yes?” You asked and took off your hat, Jinnie smiled at you and tried to fix your messy hair.

“That’s their name.” He said simply and started to walk to the classroom. He left you dumbfounded in the middle of the hall. Once back to reality you started to run after him.

“HEY!”

During class Jinnie would make an effort to not pay any attention to you, especially after how flustered he made you right beforehand. It made a little spark inside you; you thought it was funny. The way you’d catch him staring and then he’d dramatically look away. It made you laugh to yourself while you studied your history books. Mr. W started to teach the class about August Friedrich Schenk. You tuned in a bit always being interested by the way there was always an overwhelming dread in the art August Friedrich produced. You struggled painting animals so maybe that’s also why the artist also intrigued you. After the lecture Mr. W assigned you to run some errands to the other teachers, things like reports, attendance, stuff like that. You quickly did as you were told and found yourself greeted by your soon to be coworkers. One of them didn’t have a class for another hour so you found yourself making small talk.

“Is Mr. W still being nice?” She asked and started to write her lesson plan on the board. She was the poetry teacher, Ms. Felicity.

“Yes, thankfully, it is really different from being an art student in his class.” You took a sip of tea that she offered you in a paper classroom cup, “he has always been nicer to me though. I am thankful for that. He really has taken me under his wing the past two years.”

“I’m glad, especially since you’ll be working here soon.” Ms. Felicity turned around and smiled at you.

“Do you live in the next town over?” You asked, suddenly curious. She nodded.

“It is quite the commute but it’s worth it.”

You nodded; you remembered the town over was very nice.

“You know. I wanted to be the art teacher, but here I am doing poetry.” She spoke softly.

You two continued to talk until it was time for you to head back to Mr. W. You found yourself happy that maybe you made a new friend. You seemed to be lucky in that department lately. Walking back into the classroom you saw that Mr. W was close to finishing his lesson. You sat at your little desk and waited for the class to be dismissed.

“Alright, you have your assignments for the next week, remember due March 13th. I will see you guys tomorrow.” The international students started to leave, Mr. W gave you more things to study for the upcoming week

“I am very proud of your progress lately, Y/n.” Mr. W said, you gleamed at the praise.

“Thank you so much, Mr. W!” You quickly picked up your notebooks and bag, packing up. Your teacher made small talk with you about the next assignments for the art students and then sent you off.

Once again you met Jinnie outside of the classroom, “hungry?” He asked. You smiled at him and placed your hat back on your head.

“Starved!”

~+~

“The school has poetry too?” Jinnie asked as you two sat in the grass still in short distance to the school. You were laying on your jacket and you suddenly sat up.

“Yes, did you not look at the classes?” You laughed and took another bite of the wonderful sandwich Jinnie made for you two.

“Well… While signing up I was in a bit of a rush.” He said and sipped his reusable water bottle.

You finished off your sandwich and laid back down, “makes sense how you just appeared out of nowhere.”

Jinnie laughed, “I really did huh?”

“Yes, shockingly. You just poofed.” You flipped on your stomach and looked up at him.

“Is that why you ask me so many questions?” Jinnie teased.

You nodded, “that is exactly why I ask you an abundance of questions. You pique my curiosity.”

“At least you don’t just see me for my looks.” He said quietly. Your brows furrowed and you could sense the sadness in his tone. It was a total 180. You wondered where it came from, especially where the statement itself came from. Yes, he was handsome, however did the people who he ran away from just see him as that?

“No, I see you for your cooking.” You wanted to lighten the mood, anything to get that smile back on his face.

Jinnie rolled his eyes and smiled down at you, “okay Y/n. I see how it is.”

“Alright! We both have homework to do!” You stood up and put your hand out. He took it and you helped him up, cleaning up your mini picnic you two went on your merry way.

“We definitely should plant pumpkins in July.” You said and skipped along with him.

“So, they’ll be ready for Halloween, right?” Jinnie asked, you hummed.

“Exactly! The town actually does a whole thing for Halloween. It is really cute, too many tourists though.” You said, noticing once more he was lost in thought.

“Hyunjin…?” You tested the waters of saying his actual name, this caught his attention instantly.

“Am I in trouble?” Poor guy looked and sounded terrified, you laughed slightly.

“Nono I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

Jinnie nodded to himself, and he thanked you softly, “it’s just some weird stuff coming back to me again, I’ll be okay.” He reassured you.

“I understand what you mean, that happened to me on my first birthday here. I hung out with Gram the entire day.” You recalled the memory, “it was weird not being around anyone I knew.”

“My birthday is in two weeks.” He said suddenly.

Your eyes widened, “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME SOONER!” You practically jumped on him; soft giggles escaped his lips.

“We’ve been busy it didn’t come up.”

You huffed as you two made it up the hill, “what day?”

Jinnie thought for a moment, his way of keeping you in suspense, “hmmm I don’t remember.”

“HYUNJIN!”

He looked offended that you used his actual name, “now I’m not going to tell you.”

“Jinni- “

“March 20th.”

You laughed at his suddenness, “okay good! We can plan something!” Jinnie looked at you, he looked a little unreadable.

“You don’t have to…” He mumbled bashfully, you two walked into your neighborhood.

“Well, I want to, I don’t want you to have the same sad birthday as me when I first moved here.” You were determined, “what kind of cake do you want?”

“May I request your pumpkin bread?” He asked hopefully. You grinned at him.

“Yes, you may!”

~+~

The past week you and Jinnie would continue this routine of walking together to school and if you didn’t have work, you or he would make lunch. At one point he brought you lunch at work; it made you feel special. You found yourself cherishing his attention. He was way different from everyone else you have ever met. Hyunjin’s personality was as bright as the reflection of the sun on the water, and you were basking in it. There was never much to do in this town, you didn’t mind. But now that Jinnie was here, you had lots to look forward to, your schedule didn’t seem as mundane.

Saturday night you two were having dinner at your home once more, this time he brought you flowers, and you were cooking. You had music playing from the old music player in your living room.

“What did Mr. W pull you aside for yesterday? I forgot to ask.” You said as you stirred the seasonings for the oven baked potatoes.

“You forgetting to ask something? Impossible.” Jinnie joked. You turned around and gave him the stink eye, he giggled.

“He wanted to look at my sketchbook, he said on Monday he wants me to bring in some of my work that’s on a canvas.”

You flipped around, “no way.” Jinnie gave you a look as if he didn’t know why you were surprised, “he’s scouting you!”

“Psh no.” He waved his hand then took a sip of the wine he brought for you both.

“Psh yes.” You said back and started to pour the seasoning on the potatoes. Once they were in the oven you sat down next to him at the table.

“Mr. W takes one student from the class and scouts them, then if he chooses you then you get a trip to Paris for a chance to display your work at a gallery.” You explained, “I got picked my first year here when I was a student, look.” You stood up and grabbed the picture frame that was on your side table in the living room. You stomped back over and showed him the photo.

“See look.” You shoved the picture frame in his hands, “I was really young and he really took me in. I owe him a lot.”

Jinnie smiled at your photo, you were holding what he presumed to be your artwork, you didn’t look much different, “your hair was shorter.”

“That’s what you’re taking from this? Jinnie!” You grabbed the frame from him again, but he didn’t want to let go.

“Wait I wanna look at you more.” Jinnie giggled, you sighed and let go of the frame. After a few minutes of him asking questions about your younger self he handed it back.

“You really think he’s scouting me?” Jinnie asked and poured more wine for himself and you.

“Absolutely! Whenever I walk by your station I may or may not peek at what you’re working on.”

Mr. W had to be scouting him, this is what your mentor does when he notices talent. Jinnie had that talent.

“You look at my work while I’m working!?” He dramatically waved his hands around and it made you giggle.

“I did when we first met, didn’t I?”

Jinnie thought for a moment then nodded, “okay you did but I let you.”

“And why did you exactly?”

“I told you; I think you’re pretty, beautiful, gorgeous even, the most beautiful view here. Why wouldn’t I give you the opportunity to be charmed by my work.” The wine must’ve started kicking in because he was getting bold.

You face heated up and you felt yourself scoffing, “you still have to teach me your methods. I am still holding you to that.”

“I hope you do.” Jinnie said and leaned back smiling. He talked more about his walks he would take when you were working, saying he finally did find the perfect spot to take you painting. You eventually pulled out the bake potatoes and set up your plates, you also fried vegetables. Plating the food, you set it down in front of him.

“This smells wonderful.” He smiled up at you. You smiled back warmly and sat in front of him, “can you teach me something?”

You picked up on him always wanting to learn something from you, “coffee grounds are bad for your drain… uhhhh…” You thought for a moment, “I don’t think Vincent Van Gogh killed himself.”

“Oh? Elaborate.” Jinnie loved listening to you, and you loved listening to him. Eventually you two finished eating and you found yourself digging under your bed for old artwork. He wanted to see your portrait work.

“Most of them I sold to tourists at the market when I first moved here. These are the leftovers.” You handed him the canvases and he looked at your art in awe. It ranged from big to small pieces, all capturing these people’s details. Their very soul on your canvas.

“These are beautiful…” He breathed; he traced the canvas with his finger extremely delicately. You looked down.

“You should’ve seen the ones that were sold, I didn’t want to let them go but I had to make money, and this was before my bookstore job.” You spoke sadly, he looked up at you.

“We will make more pieces like these together.” Jinnie then looked down and more at your other artwork. The thought made your soul happy; you went to dig more under your bed and found old sketchbooks, one labeled abstract and you handed it to him.

“These were from highschool, if they are a bit dark, I apologize, I don’t really like looking back at these much.” You handed it to him and ever so softly he took it and started flipping through the pages. You found yourself scooting next to him and looking at the worn pages with him. Your eyes went to his face, he looked concentrated as he read the words hidden in your work.

“You made these in highschool?” He whispered, you nodded.

“It wasn’t the best time in my life… Some decisions I made led me here though, so I guess part of me should be thankful.” You whispered back. The music from the living room still playing a bittersweet tune.

“I can relate, although my last year was when I sold myself.” He flipped the page; you were studying him while he studied your work.

You looked back at the sketchbook in front of him, one day you knew you would find out about him. Maybe that night was tonight, “can you tell me?”

Jinnie looked back at you softly setting the book down, he was so gentle with your work, “yeah… I can tell you. But you can’t tell anyone else otherwise I have to leave.”

“I promise.” You looked him in his eyes, you could drown in them. He stood up and led you to sit down next to him on your bed. You shifted so one leg was dangling off and the other was folded on the bed. He sat forward, hands together. He looked stressed.

“Jinnie you don’t have to tell me if you aren’t ready.” Your hand found his way to his shoulder, and he looked at you.

“No, it… it’s okay, I want to tell you.”

You nodded and got ready to have your listening ears on.

“I used to live in Seoul, like Korea. I was very popular,” he looked away, “I was an idol, that’s why I can sing and dance. People really loved me, as much as I liked it, popularity comes with controversy. Almost every week something was wrong or something horrible was being said to me.” Jinnie took a deep breath and you grabbed his hand, he squeezed it and continued, “as much as I loved being in the spotlight and seeing the adoring eyes of people, I couldn’t take the constant pressure, getting in trouble for rumors someone else started, things I didn’t even do, I was tired, I was always scared of someone always watching me, so I ran the second I could. It is irresponsible of me, and I am sure the past month people have been freaking out, but maybe not, I don’t know, I wasn’t allowed to be active anyways when I left.”

Your hand squeezed his again, “I don’t think you’re a coward Jinnie, I just think you were burnt out and lost. That is okay and it doesn’t make you any less of who you are.”

He nodded, “thank you.”

“Anything for you.” You spoke wholeheartedly.

“Can you tell me why you ran?” He asked, you took a deep breath and nodded, Jinnie turned his whole body towards you, now he held both your hands in his large ones. He always wore the same rings.

“In high school, I didn’t have a lot of friends, so when I finally did make them, I was naïve. I really landed myself in the wrong crowd. I was young and stupid to think these people actually did care for me. One of them I thought I fell in love with,” you felt your eyes start to water, “I was wrong, it wasn’t love, my frontal lobe hadn’t even developed so how was I supposed to know that what was happening to me wasn’t love.”

A tear fell from your eye, and he caught it with his hand. You continued, “at some point it started getting really bad, I got really scared for my safety and my family’s safety so I ran. I never looked back.”

Jinnie held tightly onto your hands, “thank you for telling me.” His voice was calming, and you found yourself crashing into him, hugging him desperately. He cradled you in his arms and let you cry.

“It’s okay… Y/n let it out… I know…” His hand found its way to your head, and he played with your hair.

“I miss being home, but I know it’s safer for everyone that I left.” You said in between sobs. Hyunjin just held onto you tighter. “I know… I know exactly what that feels like.” Hyunjin kept wiping away your tears as they fell, at some point he let a few of his own tears fall.

Chapter 3: His Kindness & His Birthday

When you woke up the next morning you had a killer headache, when you stood up your head felt like someone took a bat and constantly smacked you.

“God…” You mumbled and walked toward your bathroom, you cleaned yourself up and started to recall what happened last night. When you walked out of your room you smelled food; good food, was Jinnie still here? You walked down your hallway quickly and saw him standing by the stove, he was cooking. Your curious eyes silently watched him as he stirred what you presumed to be scrambled eggs. He must’ve brought cooking ingredients over from his home. You watched as he swayed back and forth to the music he had playing on; he really could dance. It made you smile to yourself; he really could feel the music. It was impressive.

You didn’t want to embarrass him, so you walked back to your room and called his name.

“Jinnie!” You re-walked down the hallway.

“Cooking breakfast!” He called back, you walked into the kitchen, he turned around and grinned at you. The sun was peeking through the curtains, and he was illuminated beautifully, ��good morning. Are you feeling okay?”

“I have a bit of a headache.” You said and looked at what he was cooking, you were right, scrambled eggs.

“Here, I’ll get you some water. Watch the eggs please.” He spun around and started getting you your glass. You hummed and watched the eggs; it was scarily domestic. Part of you didn’t mind, Jinnie is kind and you have never related to anyone as much as him.

Jinnie handed you a cold glass of water and took over the food again, “drink up, if needed we can run to a less secluded town for headache meds.”

“I think I might still have some in the cabinet in the bathroom…” You pondered and sipped the water. He started to plate the eggs and put jam on the toast.

“Where did you get all this food?” You asked, as you sat down on the table. He quickly put the food down and sat with you.

“I had some back at my house and then I picked up the jam this morning from the general store.” He said simply.

You nearly choked on your food, “you walked to town this morning?”

Jinnie nodded, “mhm, after our crying session last night we must’ve both passed out. You were still asleep when I woke up, so I wanted to make you breakfast.”

“That’s very kind of you.” You took a bite of your food and once again your tastebuds were delighted.

“I figured it would be nice after yesterday.” He spoke softly. Yeah, yesterday… You were hit with waves of memories. He ended up telling you why he ran, and you told him why you ran too. He was an idol… Like a celebrity?

“Do you have any questions? You have a cute funny look on your face.” Jinnie looked up at you.

“So you were-“ You didn’t even know how to ask.

Jinnie wiped his mouth of any crumbs, “an idol, performer, celebrity, whatever you want to call it.”

You nodded, “are you ever going to go back?” Part of you didn’t want him to. Your eyes just watched him as he shrugged and looked away from you.

“Not for a while…” He mumbled, then made eye contact with you, “so you’ll be bothered by me for a long time.” Jinnie smiled at you which you gladly returned to him.

“I look forward to it.”

~+~

The next week on his birthday you showed up at his home in the early morning, you were surprised that he was already up. Sometimes you noticed you had to grab the key under his mat and get him out of bed.

“Good morning, Y/n!” He said in a sing song voice, you noticed his basket was packed full of things.

“Good morning, Jinnie!” You grabbed the pumpkin bread from behind your back, “happy birthday!”

You saw his eyes light up and he grabbed the bread, smelling it. After, he set it down and pulled you in a hug, “thank you!”

When he pulled away, he put his hands on your shoulders, “you’re free today right?”

“Yes, I called off for your birthday.” You smiled brightly up at him.

Jinnie clasped his hands together, “perfect!” He quickly rushed to his basket and put the bread in, “we are going for a walk!”

“Right now?” You questioned.

“Yes!” He grabbed his basket and your hand, “we need to pick up your art supplies!”

After the pitstop at your home, you two went on your way.

“It’s your birthday I should be surprising you!” You walked and swayed your bag back and forth. He giggled and copied your actions.

“Well, this is how I want to spend my birthday.” Jinnie said, he led the way, walking in front of you. He would steal glances at you as you two walked.

“Where are we heading?” You were so curious as to where your mysterious neighbor, companion, friend, was leading you.

“You never fail to be so curious.” His voice was warm.

“Welllllllll!” You continuously swung your bag back and forth.

Jinnie turned around to look at you and turned his head, there was something in his eyes you couldn’t pinpoint, “do you trust me?” He asked.

You nodded your head, “yes I do.”

“Perfect.” He grabbed your hand and continued to lead you. You really tried not to get nervous, then your hand would become sweaty.

He started to lead you to the back side of the neighborhood, you decided to keep asking him questions.

“Is thiiiis… A nice place we’re going to?”

“Of course, it’s nice, I’m actually surprised that you haven’t been here.” He spoke.

You looked at him, “I don’t usually go this way. Can you still dance for me.”

Jinnie giggled, “yes Y/n.”

“Sing?”

“Yes, Y/n only for you.”

You started to swing your hands back and forth, you two were walking next to each other now.

“Okay we are getting close so close your eyes.” Jinnie said excitedly.

Your eyes closed and you couldn’t help but smile, you let him guide you deeper into the trees. Your feet almost betrayed you a couple of times, with the rock and loose dirt, but he caught you and just held onto you tighter. You felt his warm hands on your arms then they covered your eyes.

“No peeking.” He said, you let a giggle out.

“I’m not peeking!”

“Suuuure.” He teased.

In the next minute he took his hands off your face, “okay wait here.” You heard him giggling and shifting around.

“I have to get cushions down n stuff.” He explained, “keep your eyes closed!”

“I am! I am! I promise.” You covered your own eyes. You heard him shuffle around more until finally.

“Okay open!”

When you opened your eyes you were met with a beautiful scenic lake, and Jinnie was standing there with a ‘well?’ stance.

“I found this place a little while ago while getting lost to the town, total opposite direction. But it was worth it.” He jogged up to you, “plus it’s perfect to paint.”

You never really had someone be this thoughtful in years, let alone someone who wants to take care of you just because. It was hard to not get a little emotional.

“Wow…” You breathed.

“Perfect right?!” He grabbed your hand and sat you down on the cushion. He pulled out the canvases and paints.

“Just try to paint it, I want to see you do it. Not how I do it.” He said and sat down next to you. You nodded, still in awe about this whole thing. You took out your brushes and started to paint, this time you felt eyes on you. You weren’t watching him paint; he was observing you now.

“You’re making me nervous.” You spoke just above a whisper.

“You do this to me all the time.” Jinnie leaned closer to you, you could feel his breath on you.

“Does it make you nervous?” Your eyes kept going back and forth from the view to your canvas. You kept your stomach erupt in butterflies when he leaned even closer to you.

“Yeah, it does.” Jinnie said, “you’re doing great by the way, I don’t see why you need my help with this.” He continued to watch you paint in silence, you were about halfway done.

“Did you even need my help?” Jinnie teased.

You whipped your head over to him and bumped your face with his, he started giggling almost manically.

“What?” You questioned him, waving the paintbrush, you ended up splattering paint on him. Now both of you were laughing.

“You know what!” He grabbed a brush and started whipping paint at you too. You two started to battle with paintbrushes. The different color droplets started to spray everywhere.

“Ah! Jinnie!” You grabbed a glob of blue acrylic paint and whipped it at him, he retaliated by grabbing yellow paint. At some point you two were chasing after each other.

“Get back here!” Jinnie said, you turned around and saw he was right behind you. You yelped and started to run backwards right into the lake. Jinnie started laughing at you now that you were soaked. But when he skidded at the edge of the lake, he slipped on the mud. His body landed right next to yours with a splash. His head peaked out of the water, his hair everywhere. The water droplets mixing with the paint that stained his face. You didn’t know how he could look more beautiful.

“Look who’s laughing now.” You teased him. His large hand splashed water at you. You gasped and splashed water back at him. You both eventually stood up still splashing water at each other. You started to try and wade away from him, still laughing. You made it out of the water and kept running.

“Y/nnnnn!” He whined, you turned around and taunted him. You closed your eyes and stuck your tongue out. Before you knew it, he was dragging you back into the lake. You were yelping and laughing.

“Jiiiinniee!”

SPLASH

When you opened your eyes, you saw he was right on top of you, “whoops I fell in too.”

“You schmo!” You laughed, closing your eyes again, and tilted your head back, letting the lake soak your hair.

“Schmo?!” He grabbed your shoulders and lightly shook you, your giggles escaping you. When you opened your eyes again your hair was partially blocking your view. But once again you were met with his eyes staring back at you with that far off look he had earlier. Jinnie smiled at you like you were a warm cup of coffee on the coldest day of the year. His hand, still dripping with the lake water brushed your hair out of your eyes.

“Tu es belle (beautiful girl).” Jinnie whispered under his breath.

“Where did you learn that?” You whispered back, his hand cupped your cheek.

“Picked up stuff from Gram.” His eyes never left yours, “she wanted me to know how to compliment you, to woo you per say… I intend to do so. Is it working?”

“Oui.” You grinned at him and tilted your head back again, partially because you didn’t want him to see your flustered face. Your face burned when you felt his soft lips touch your cheek; your breath hitched, and you looked up at him.

“Was that too much?” He asked his voice wavering slightly, one of his hands still held onto your waist and to the side of your face.

“It wasn’t enough.” You put your hands on his cheeks and kissed him. He jumped a bit before quickly melting into your touch.

~+~

“I think that this piece is better than any of my landscapes.”

You looked at the painting you created which was now hung on his wall, “you helped create it.”

“The paint splatters really do add to the landscape, don’t they?” Jinnie placed his hands on your waist, “definitely my favorite birthday present, this year.”

“I’m glad this birthday was good for you.” You grinned up at him and tackled him into a hug. He started laughing.

“You made it better.” He kissed your forehead.

“Walk with me to school tomorrow?” You questioned.

“Mmmm I’d have to check my schedule… I think I only have a rose bush to nurture with a gorgeous girl in the afternoon… Yeah, I can fit you in for a walk in the morning.”

~+~

The next few weeks were peaceful, you and Jinnie’s routine became a part of your lives. He started to sleep over often, and you would sleep over at his home frequently as well. Your favorite thing to do with him was cook, sometimes he would sway with you while the pasta boiled. He would softly spin you while the bread needed to rise. Jinnie was a dream come true in your world. Your heart never felt so safe with anyone before. Life was simple and you two cherished that. The way he would look at you with love and adoration in his eyes is something you will always cherish.

Now you were painting in the living room of his home, he was picking up groceries so you two could bake together for Gram. You bit the end of the wood on your paintbrush, a sick habit you have developed over time. One Jinnie would giggle at.

“My intended I’m home!” He called from the door, you quickly hopped up and followed his voice. There he was in all his glory, with his basket overflowing with groceries. You grinned and practically jumped in his arms. Jinnie yelped and then returned your giggles.

“Miss me?”

“Always.” You pulled away and led him to his kitchen. You helped him put away groceries and started to set up for the now weekly bread. Gram was very happy about this.

“Oh, I also picked something up from the back of the market.” Jinnie sprung up and walked back outside, the way he sauntered always made you smile. He made you smile, especially when he came back from outside with this giant box.

“This guy at the back of the market was selling things, and I noticed on your bookshelf you have a lot of old golden spine books at the top of your shelf.” He spoke excitedly, you honestly forgot about those old children’s books at the top, your main priority now was the old art books. Jinnie set the box on the counter, “the guy I think said that he had no idea if it still works, but! Even if it doesn’t maybe you could take the cases and make a collage.”

You opened up the big box and saw a ton of old VHS tapes, with a player to watch them. You saw old films from the 90s that ranged from The Titanic to old Disney Princess movies. Your eyes lit up, before you left home you had an obsession with movies of any kind. Your obsession slowed down when you moved here.

“Jinnie what about a TV?” You looked up, questioning him.

He gave you a toothy grin, “when I first bought this house he mentioned a REALLY old TV in the attic. If it doesn’t work, we can just take a trip to the next town over.”

Once again, your eyes lit up, “Jinnie!” You hugged him again and he smiled into your neck.

“I figured it would be nice to watch movies other than art documentaries in class, not that I don’t love them.” He mumbled, still holding onto you as if you would disappear any minute, “I also picked something else up.” He pulled away from you and pulled something out of his pocket, it was a small gold necklace, with a rose adorned on the front.

“Jinnie…!” Your breath hitched.

He spun you around and placed the necklace on you, “he was also selling antique jewelry, he discounted it for me. It reminds me of the rosebush that’s now blooming outside of my house. All because of you.”

You turned around and hugged him tightly. Hwang Hyunjin was everything you wanted in a partner...

“You’re so thoughtful.” You pulled away from him, looking at him with stars, “we can set up the movie night tonight and thank you so much for the necklace! Now! Gram has some bread to be made!”

Jinnie nodded with the same dreamy look and you two started baking up a storm. Gram was very happy seeing you two spend so much time together. You noticed how overtime Jinnie really did pay so close attention to her stories. He loved them, especially the love stories. Part of him didn’t seem real to you. When you two parted ways from Gram she gave you and Jinnie a hug and you two walked back across the street.

“You seem to pay more attention to me than Gram now.” He teased, opening his door. You huffed as he let you in first.

“I can’t help it, you’re cute when you’re enthralled in something.” You spun around.

Jinnie chuckled, “I’ll set everything up, do you want to maaaaybe plate some fruit and bread for us pleaaaase.”

“Didn’t you just have my pumpkin bread at Grams?” Your eyes teased him. Jinnie whined and you quickly gave in. You skipped into the kitchen and started to make a snack, it was getting late and you assumed you were sleeping here so you sidetracked into his room. Looking around you found your set of pajamas that you kept at his home. Then you skipped back into the kitchen and finished plating your guy’s food. From the room you heard him curse slightly, you walked in and set the plates on the coffee table. Squatting by him you softly rubbed his back.

“Want tea too?”

Jinnie nodded, his brows furrowed. You could tell he was determined to make this movie night work. It was something you really loved about him; he would try. You were never used to men like this growing up. You happily started the kettle and made tea.

“MY DEAREST INTENDED!” He started running into the kitchen, “I did it! I did it!”

~+~

“Are you sure you want to go through the chest?” He asked as you knelt at the foot of your bed, you took a deep breath and nodded.

“I think it’s time, plus I might’ve stole a couple photo albums, you’ll get to see baby me.”

Jinnie grinned at this and you unlocked the big trunk, it was like how you left it two years ago, almost three. You had an old sweater, joggers, your backpack, laptop, phone, everything.

“Woah.” Jinnie said and started digging through the trunk of stuff. He was really looking for the small photo albums. You took out your phone and laptop, tossing them aside.

“I totally forgot I packed this.” You giggled as you picked up a copy of The Shining.

“Are you a Stephen King fan?” He mumbled, still looking for the photos of your past. You hummed.

“I was, then I read IT and got weirded out.”

You heard Jinnie laugh, then he pulled out something from your backpack, “a Taylor Swift CD?”

“I WAS LIKE 19!” You retorted; he started giggling more.

“I prefer Lana Del Rey, but I can enjoy Taylor Swift.” He teased you, then he finally found what he was looking for. The small old photo albums.

Your body curled up next to him as you pointed out various family members, he listened intently. You thought going through this old trunk was going to be horrible, but with Jinnie, it wasn’t. He asked questions about your family and you happily answered them laughing or with stories that were stored in your memories. You even got reminded of some stuff. If something sparked a story in Jinnie he would tell it to you as well.

“You’d love my mom.” Jinnie said and giggled at your baby photos.

“I think my mom would love you, my dad is hard to win over though.”

Jinnie chuckled then looked at you with a serious look, “do you think we will ever see them again? Or even get to meet them?”

“God, I hope so…” Your voice was quiet. You wanted so badly to introduce Hyunjin to your parents. You know they would love him and be so happy for you. He is everything your parents wanted for you. Respectful, smart, charming, they have always wanted that for you. Now that you have it, you want them so badly to see you this happy. They would be proud of you.

“I think we will get to meet each other’s families.” Jinnie spoke suddenly. You looked at him.

“You think?” Now you were fully pulled out of your thoughts.

Jinnie nodded, his hair falling in front of his eyes, which you pushed softly away.

“I know we will get to. You are my intended after all.”

~+~

You ended up being right about Mr. W scouting Jinnie for the next exhibit in Paris.

“Jinnie you have to except it.” You paced back and forth, your feet pittering and pattering on the old wood.

“Y/n I don’t know. Don’t you think that’ll bring too much attention to me?” You two were currently talking about whether or not he should take it. At this point the semester was nearly over, and that means the Paris trip would be soon. You knelt by him on the couch.

“You could always do a fake name… Maybe cover your face…” You looked up at him, “Jinnie this is really big for your art.”

He looked conflicted, “if that doesn’t work then what am I going to do? Go back and leave you here? I can’t do that…”

“You’re worried about having to leave me?” You leaned your head on his knee, he caressed your cheek. His fingers drifted to the necklace he gave you weeks ago. You seemed to only take it off while you bathed. Not that he paid attention to that or anything.

“Of course, I am, I know I wouldn’t have a choice if I was found out.”

“Hyunjin…” You stood up and sat next to him, his hair had grown out more and he had the same scared dog look to him again. Just like he did when you first met him.

“Y/n, I don’t know what I would do, I know I sound crazy and I know it hasn’t been that long, I know I wear my heart on my sleeve and I know I romanticize every little thing, I can’t just- I-“

You put your hand in his, “it’s okay Jinnie. We aren’t at that yet, and that might not even happen.”

He nodded and took a deep breath, “I’ll explain my situation to Mr. W. Tell him my conditions and then we will go from there.”

Your lips curved into a smile, and you kissed his cheek, “I’m so proud of you, Hyunjin, even if you decide not to go.”

Jinnie looked at you and he looked more relaxed, he squeezed your hand, “I love you so much.”

You had to force your brain to not make your tears flow, “I love you more.”

“I’ll talk to him tomorrow after class,” he stood up, “I want you to come with me if I go to Paris.”

Jinnie pulled you with him, your body crashed into his and he held you.

“You do?” Your eyes loved the sight of him.

“I do.” He lifted both of your hands on his shoulders and put his on your waist, “I know you have work but-“

“I want to go with you, I want to support you. I’d go anywhere with you.”

Jinnie smiled warmly at you, “I’ll have to hold you to that.”

“You still have to sing to me.” Your eyes playfully narrowed at him, he huffed and swayed you two.

“I sing to you all the time, it’s not my fault you’re always already asleep.” He gave you a funny look back. You pretended to be offended.

“No fair! Sing me to sleep tonight!” You said, he giggled and spun you. You ended up crashing into him.

“Say please my intended.”

You looked up at him, “please sing me to sleep tonight.”

Jinnie kissed you softly, you kissed him back and whined a bit when he pulled away, “as you wish.”

~+~

The next morning on the walk to school Jinnie really took in his surroundings like it would be the last time to. It really scared you. He wouldn’t get out of bed until you two absolutely had to. He wouldn’t let go of you while you cooked breakfast, and he wanted you to stay in the kitchen when he prepped your guys’ lunch.

“Jinnie are you okay?” You noticed how he really was looking at the sunrise on the hill. He looked at you and sighed.

“I’m just preparing for the worst.”

You were worried about him, “Jinnie, I know what I said but if you really don’t want to do this-“

“My love, I’ve always wanted to have my art in an exhibit, and- and you’re right. I need to at least try. Maybe he won’t even care that I want to go by another name. That’s pretty normal for artists.”

“That is true…” You nodded and mumbled, “but what if he looks up your legal name?”

“I don’t think he will.” Jinnie said, “at least I really hope not.”

When you two finally made it to school you noticed how he didn’t let go of your hand. Usually he would, you both decided to only tell Gram about your relationship.

“It’ll be okay Hyunjin…” You said to him, he nodded and walked into class first, finally letting go. You quickly followed after him. The whole time you could tell he wasn’t paying attention, his leg would bounce, and his brush would shake before it hit the canvas. It really hurt your heart to see him like this. You didn’t know what to do about this. He wanted this but his past life was still holding him hostage. No matter what though, you were determined to be there for him.

Chapter 4: Broken Trust

After class you waited for Jinnie to stop talking to Mr. W, you picked at your fingernails trying to calm yourself down. Seeing how nervous he was made you feel like throwing up. Taking a deep breath, you leaned your head back against the wall.

“It’ll be okay…” You mumbled to yourself. Your eyes closed and you tried to calm yourself down. Part of you knew Jinnie had to go back at some point, even you had to go back at some point. You just hope that maybe it would be you two together going back and facing what you both left. You should really call your parents soon… Your eyes shot open, and you stood up when the door opened. Jinnie smiled at Mr. W and wished him a good day. Then he turned to you.

“He is totally okay with it.” Jinnie beamed at you and hugged you tightly, “I really want you to come with me.”

Your giggles started when you felt his hair tickle your face, “I will be there.”

~+~

“I want to call my parents.” You said to him a couple days later. He looked up from his plate with wide eyes.

“Are you sure?” Jinnie asked, his mouth full, eyes still wide.

You swallowed hard and nodded, “I’m sure. I think they need to know that I’m okay, all I left them was a note saying I’d be back soon. I feel guilty about it.”

Jinnie nodded, “do you want me to be next to you when you call?”

“Please. I know it’s sort of a lot to ask but- “

He grabbed your hand from across the table, “nothing is too much for you to ask of me.”

Your nerves calmed and you nodded, “thank you Jinnie.”

“You’re most welcome, my intended.”

After dinner you two sat on the floor, your landline phone and your actual cell phone next to each other. The plan was, if the landline didn’t get an answer, then it was a last resort to turn on your old cell phone and call.

“Are you nervous?” Jinnie asked as he sat cross-legged in front of you. Your shoulders shrugged.

“What if they get mad at me? What if they hate me for leaving?”

Hyunjin took a deep breath, “did they know what was going on?”

You nodded softly, “my dad even went to the court room, he stayed outside but he knew what was going on.”

“I don’t think they will be mad.” Hyunjin lightly pushed the phone towards you. You took a deep breath and started to dial. Your hands shook and Hyunjin held your free hand.

Brrrr brrrr brr- click

“Hello?” It was your dad’s voice, you felt that feeling in your throat. You were choked up. You froze. Hyunjin mustve sensed this because he tried to get you back to reality asap.

“Dad?” You said quickly, thankful Hyunjin snapped you out of it.

“If this is some joke, I don’t think this is very fucking funny.” Your father’s voice was stern, just as you remembered it.

“No-No it’s me. Y/n L/n, it’s me, your kid, the one who used to eat the dead flies off the bay window.” You spoke quickly, you saw Jinnie give you a funny look. He was trying to not laugh or make fun of you in this moment.

“Y/N!” Your dad sounded relieved to hear your voice, “I-I’m so glad you’re okay… We didn’t know when you were going to come back, and you never answered any calls.”

“I know… I’m really sorry, I was stupid and thought everything was going to be safer if I left.” You spoke softly.

Your dad let out a sigh, “Kiddo, your heart was in the right place… Home is safe now, we moved, and the door is always open for you.”

Your eyes started to water, “you guys moved?”

“Yeah, a couple months after you left, we figured you left because of the situation, some people were saying that he finally- I don’t even want to get into it.” There was a pain in his voice.

“I’m so sorry. I feel like it was my fault, I still feel like if I didn’t- “

Your dad interrupted you, “Y/n. Nothing was your fault.”

The tears fell and you covered your mouth, choking on a sob, you heard your dad tell you to breathe. Something that when you were a teenager, he had to tell you quite often. You were almost an exact copy of him, he knew how bad it could get. You missed this familiarity.

“I’m sorry.” You repeated.

“It’s okay, I promise. I will give you our new address, visit whenever you want. Please call whenever you want. I know you probably don’t want to disclose where you are and that’s okay. I’m just so happy you aren’t dead.”

Your father gave you the new address and you wrote it down. After catching up a bit, the call ended. Jinnie stayed by your side the entire time, he read his book and held your hand. When the call was finished, he softly set the book down.

“How do you feel?”

You tackled him in a hug on the couch, “I’m so happy Hyunjin!”

~+~

“Okay Y/n is everything packed?” Jinnie asked, you nodded. After you called your dad, Jinnie figured going on a nice weekend trip would help with the heaviness of the past couple weeks. He didn’t tell you where you guys were going, but you trusted him with everything.

“Can you pleaaase tell me?” You asked as you two walked to the town for the millionth time. He started to pack your bags in the rental car.

“No, it’s a surprise.” He evilly giggled. You whined.

“Can you give me a hint?” You leaned against the car.

Jinnie looked at you with his hand on his hip, “no.”

“Have I been there before?”

He rolled his eyes and pecked your lips, “I really hope not.” He closed the trunk and you two started your drive.

“I haven’t been in a car in forever.” You mumbled looking around the interior. Jinnie laughed a little and kept his eyes on the road.

“Don’t get carsick, it’s sort of a long ride.”

You hummed and nodded, “Jinnie?”

“Yes, my intended?”

“Are you excited for the Paris exhibit?”

Your eyes watched as his toothy grin formed, “yes Y/n I’m ecstatic.”

“Good!” You smiled, matching his grin.

As the car ride carried on, you started to doze off. Jinnie said it was okay if you fell asleep, so you let yourself doze off. When you woke, you were still driving, so you fell asleep again.

“I have to get gas; do you have to use the restroom or anything?” He shook you softly awake. You stirred and looked at him sleepily. His smile at you warmed. He looked at you as if you were a warm blanket after a long day outside during the coldest of winters.

“Mmm I’m hungry…” You mumbled and took off your seatbelt.

“Okay let me gas up and I will go in with you.”

You nodded and waited for him, after he fed the car, he parked in the lot and opened your door for you. Your hand found his and you two walked to the little convenience store. When your eyes landed on all the snacks and things they practically sparkled. You hadn’t seen stuff like this for years.

“Jinnie! Look!” You pulled him to the sunglasses. You grabbed a pair and put one on, “do these look nice?”

“Hmmmm, try these ones.” He said and switched them out. You giggled as he put them on your face, after adjusting them and looking into the mirror you nodded. They were circular and red, very old fashioned.

“I like these!”

Jinnie helped you to get some snacks and he paid for them, much to your dismay. Before you knew it, you two were on the road again.

“We are almost there I promise, I know we have been driving for a few hours…” Jinnie mumbled and glanced at you. You sat there munching on some snacks in your new sunglasses.

“Okay Jinnie.” You smiled and took another bite.

He wasn’t wrong, you two were almost there, at some point when the mountain road cleared your eyes met the blue ocean.

“Oh my god!” You practically jumped out of your seat.

“Nice way to kick off the summer?” He asked.

You turned to him, your hair a mess, sunglasses slanted, clothes disheveled, “YES!”

Jinnie smiled and started toward the small home he rented for the weekend. It was a walk from the beach and right when he stopped the car you started running toward the water. You craved the warm sand on your toes and the cold water on your skin. Your feet didn’t stop until you jumped into the water, clothes and all. You saw Jinnie laughing and jogging after you. He always looked like a dream, someone so perfect could only be in your imagination. Yet… Here he was. He wasn’t imaginary, he was just perfect in your eyes.

“This is amazing!” You laughed and waved your new shades back and forth. Jinnie stood by the water letting it hit his feet. You noticed how he was taking it all in as well.

“I know we have to take a trip to Paris next week, but I thought that this would be a nice way to relax before things get busy again.”

You jumped out of the water and hugged him, getting him, all soaked from the ocean.

“Ah!” He jumped and tried to get out of your grip.

“Jiiiiinnnnie!” You whined and looked up at him, his eyes softened, and he kissed you. Perfect, you caught him off guard and you threw both of your bodies into the water. Just like back at home in the lake, where he kissed you the first time. His laughter rang through your ears, you didn’t think you would ever get tired of hearing his laughter. Jinnie’s crazy, loud, stupid laughter. It could make symphonies jealous.

~+~

You two laid in bed with the balcony doors open. The moon shone in, illuminated the room in a pale blue. Almost like the room’s saturation was turned down. The ocean waves could be heard, sometimes the breeze would move the curtains. You laid there playing with his hair, you took in every mole and every imperfection. To you though, the imperfections is what made him human. It’s what made him your intended, just as you were his.

“I need to get it cut before the exhibit.” He mumbled into your arm.

“My boss at the bookstore used to trim mine.” You whispered. Hyunjin nodded.

He slowly opened his eyes; he was so beautiful inside and out. Yeah, sometimes he was a little odd, memories flashed in your head. Sometimes he would chase the birds on the way home from class, other times you noticed he just wanted to watch movies to cry. Hyunjin was one of a kind in your eyes, he was caring and compassionate. No other person compared to his kindness. No other person compared to his uniqueness in general.

“Do you know why I call you my intended?” He asked and his hand found its way to your cheek. Your mouth curved slightly.

“Why is that?”

“I intend to stay with you. No matter what.” He softly kissed your cheek.

Your breath hitched, “you think I’m worth that?”

“You’re worth more than anything, that’s why I spoil you so. You deserve it, you deserve everything. I want to be the one to give you that happy ending.” Hyunjin pulled away from you, eyes locking, “you have made this the best few months I have had in a while. You gave me hope that my childish fantasies of love were true. I am so glad I found that my hopes are within you.”

“I want a happy ending with you.” You breathed, he smiled at you.

“What kind of ending?”

You leaned on your back now, “I dunno, maybe one where we are all old and sometimes gross,” you heard him laugh before you continued, “maybe have a nicer home somewhere else, one where we own it together.” You turned to him, “maybe even get a dog or cat. No birds though, you’d chase it away.”

You felt his lips on yours, “it sounds perfect.”

“What about…?” You looked at him.

“Hmm?” Hyunjin asked, shuffling under the blankets.

“What about your family?”

Hyunjin’s face fell a bit before going back to a lovestruck look, “I will have to go home at some point, but I will always come back to you. I promise.” He kissed your hand.

“I love you, Hyunjin.”

“I love you most, my intended.”

~+~

On the car ride home, you felt yourself getting really carsick, like REALLY carsick. The previous day you two ate at some seafood place and it was not agreeing with your stomach. In the morning you threw up the fish and Jinnie had to watch over you. He made jokes with made you laugh. It wasn’t all bad. You learned that even if he got grossed out, he would still be there.

You two stopped at the gas station once more and this time he bought a matching pair of sunglasses, just to make you smile. Everything felt too good to be true. When you two got home, it felt right to be home with him. Everything felt so perfect with him. He led you to your room and straight to your bathroom. You had to bathe after that long car ride. Jinnie helped you wash up and it was the most vulnerable you have ever been around another human. It opened your world to what you were missing. After what happened you tended to close your world heavily. You didn’t want to love when you didn’t know what love even was. Now you do.

“My intended, I am going to grab some clean clothes from my house. Lay down here, do you need anything while I am away?” He set you down by the bed, your wet hair soaking the pillow.

“I’m okay.” You smiled up at him, he looked down at you, eyes full of adoration. Jinnie nodded and headed out of the door. You started to fade in and out of consciousness. The drive and the food poisoning were really hitting you. You were tired, exhausted even.

At some point, you faded awake and you felt Hyunjin lay next to you, he held you tighter than usual. Your neck felt wet, but you just assumed that he showered or something. Your body just turned more into him, you let him hold you. His breathing was staggered and you would have asked if he was okay, if your own body wasn’t on shut down.

“I love you so much, please know that.”

~*~

The next morning you woke up feeling so much better. The sickness was out of your system, you could hear the birds in the morning. The light shown in your curtains, it felt perfect. You got up thinking Jinnie was making breakfast, skipping in the kitchen you noticed that there was a plate of food. But no Jinnie. Your brows furrowed and you looked at the scene in front of you. The plate of seasoned potatoes and eggs, his sketchbook, and a note.

Y/n, I don’t even know how to start this, I guess I should just explain when I got back to my house to pick up my clothes one of my old friends was there, he started bawling and hugging me when he finally saw me again he started saying how they looked for me everywhere, even though they weren’t technically allowed to, he said that Mr. W ratted me out to JYP. That is the company I am signed to. He ratted me out Y/n, and they came to pick me up. Apparently, I am allowed to work again. They paid Mr. W handsomely to give them My location, and he did.

Your eyes started to well up, you knew he was too good to be true. You took a deep breath and continued to read.

I didn’t want to leave; I told my friend I didn’t. But when I was about to walk out toward your house, the rest of my friends were there too. Some of the strongest people I know were crying when they saw me. People who usually don’t hug me, hugged me. I wanted to wake you up. Take you with me, I wanted you to always be in my world. But I was vetoed quickly. I am so sorry that I have to leave like this. When things settle down I promise I will come back for you. I always will. I am leaving you with my sketchbook. I promise Y/n, I promise you my Intended. I will be back. I am so very much in love with you.

-Your Intended forever, Jinnie.

Originally, you felt sad. Now a wave of anger washed over you. You put on your shoes and ran out, it was Monday, you were supposed to leave for France with Jinnie today. That wasn’t going to happen because of someone whom you looked up to. And for what? Money.

Your feet led you to the school, anger was an understatement. You slammed open the school door and stormed into the classroom. Mr. W stood there, looking at you with a shocked expression. He clearly wasn’t expecting you so early.

“What is wrong with you!?” You yelled.

“His friends were looking for him Y/n.” Your mentor said simply, “I did the right thing.”

“You did the right thing for MONEY!” Your voice still raised, “I am going to the exhibit fucking alone, I am taking his work WITH me.” You started grabbing all of Hyunjin’s canvases.

“Hyunjin was going to go back eventually when he HEALED, you sold him out because of your own selfish wants and needs.” You spoke with a lace of venom in your tone.

Mr. W scoffed, “again Y/n he was going to go back eventually, they needed to know where he was, I just delivered. And how on Earth are you going to do this without me? I taught you everything you know. You are supposed to take my position here.” You did not like when men talked to you like this.

“I went to the exhibit last year, and I think if I explained how you sold out the artist picked this year, they will fucking understand why you aren’t there to join me. Find another apprentice, I am leaving.”

And that you did, you meant what you said. The driver that was going to take you to Paris showed up, Mr. W didn’t meet you at your home like he was supposed to. He was a rat, a selfish waste of space. The driver helped you with Hyunjin’s work and your own work. You might as well try and turn this situation positive. The whole drive there was awkward.

The whole exhibit felt wrong.

It felt like something was missing.

He was missing.

~*~

Only one good thing came out of it, people liked yours and his work, many people asked to sell his work to them. You declined but sold all your own work. You sold all your possessions through the bookstore manager back at that small French town. You erased your existence there. You settled down in a small abode in the city. In the heart of Paris, you resided. Mr. W got a bad reputation at that school, the poetry teacher told you. She hunted you down after you left. She would give you updates on what was happening. Until eventually she would stop calling. That was the last connection cut from that little French town.

Slowly, your own art got more recognition. A year had passed, and you got popular in the art scene. You could afford more, as much praise as you were getting, you still felt so very empty. Most nights you found yourself looking up above the mantle, your favorite piece. It was priceless to you, your favorite landscape.

You sat on the couch mentally preparing for your next meeting, it was going to discuss the next exhibit location. Taking a deep breath, you leaned back. You finally made a name for yourself but at what cost. It wasn’t even your fault. The world you learned was littered with selfish people. The more meetings, the more people, the more people, the more your optimistic mindset declined. There was never a day that went by where you didn’t miss Hyunjin immensely. You researched him behind the scenes, you kept an eye on him. When he posted on their Instagram that he purchased one of your works, you bawled for days.

Taking another breath you stood up, he knew where to find you, yet he hasn’t. That isn’t on you. Grabbing your things you headed down to the lobby of your apartment. You sat in a boring meeting until someone rushed in, it wasn’t so mindless anymore.

“I am so sorry, someone literally stole my bike and I had to rush here.” The man was very tall, hair a mess now. His clothing was impeccable. He had a warm drink in his hand, his glasses almost falling off his nose. He quickly walked to his seat, which was next to you.

When the meeting went on you started to get curious of the man next to you. He was attractive, no lie. Your stubborn heart wasn’t going to pine after him though. When the meeting ended and the location of your exhibit was chosen you quickly walked out.

“Wait!”

You flipped around and saw the man goofily run up to you, “yes…?”

“I wanted to introduce myself, I absolutely love your work and it took a lot of digging to even get into that meeting.” He fixed his glasses.

“Oh.” You said simply. The grown man nodded and stuck his hand out.

“I am Kim Namjoon.”

You smiled and shook his hand, “Y/n.”

You two started to walk together, “so that’s your real name?” He sparked conversation with your closed off demeaner so easily.

“Yes, you didn’t think my name was actually ‘intended’ did you?” You asked, adjusting your coat. It was cold in the spring, although summer was coming quickly. You could just tell.

Namjoon let out a laugh, another unique laugh. You felt yourself smile softly to yourself.

“Well, I wasn’t sure. Sometimes people have distinctive names.” He spoke with a tone that was so interesting to you. This Namjoon was an interesting individual.

“I think your name is nice, I’ve never heard it before.” You spoke. Your bag swung a bit, you looked up at him. Namjoon’s brows furrowed.

“You haven’t?” He asked.

“I mean, it could be familiar, but I don’t know. Should I know it?” Your voice was teasing. The banter made Namjoon smile.

“Well, I was just. I was just in a music industry so it threw me off slightly.” He said quieting his voice.

“Oh?” You asked.

“Yeah, I was in a k-pop group. Sometimes I still make music, but the group is only sometimes now. I don’t mind, the space from all of that lets me enjoy other forms of art.”

Your heart got reminded of what it was stolen of.

“That’s good that you are growing every day.” You said, your tone was cold. A total 180, Namjoon didn’t seem to notice though. As he walked you to your apartment he asked about your work, about you, he made sure you were comfortable.

You ended up letting him in your apartment.

“So, you were in a k-pop group?” You were curious, “was the company bad in any way?”

Namjoon’s brows furrowed, confused by your question. Also confused by your sudden interest in that part of his life.

“Well, when I first started yeah it was rough. But then we just started controlling our own little section of the company. So, I am now in charge of what I do.” He spoke, sipping the tea you made for him.

“Ah…” You sat down at the table with him, you looked out the window at the city. This window of the house barely showed the Eiffel Tower.

“You are different then how I expected you to be.” Namjoon spoke. You perked up.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

He let out a laugh, “its not a bad thing, with how dark your work is, part of me expected a very tortured very damaged person. However, looking at you now, I can still see you have a little spark in your eyes.”

Your eyes softened, you really thought that spark was gone from your soul. But if a complete stranger saw it, maybe the spark wasn’t died out completely.

“You can?” Your voice softened, you didn’t want to cave so easily. However, you felt your walls starting to crumble. When you moved to Paris and started to get popular you were telling men and women left and right to fuck off if they wanted to court you. It was even worse if they TRIED to court you. But Namjoon, he seemed sincere. Your heart dropped when you saw your piece above the mantle. You caved in on yourself. Namjoon picked up on this.

“Was that too much? I’m sorry.” He quickly apologized, you rapidly shook your head no.

“it’s just been a while since I have sat down with someone like this.” You took a sip of your own tea, “it isn’t bad. Its just something different for me.”

Namjoon nodded, “I am in Paris for about a week, I was actually planning on going to your exhibit because either way I wanted to meet you, but I am ranting, anyways, if you would like to do this more, like sit down and talk.”

You looked up at him and smiled, “I would like that.”

He was a little awkward, but maybe he was charming you slightly.

~*~

You two ended up exchanging numbers after he had tea with you that one day, a couple days passed and you two decided to go to a local restaurant down the road. He was going to meet you at your apartment, and you would buzz him up. You put on your makeup and got dressed, back in the small town your clothing was lighter colors. Now you noticed it was all black and navy blue. Dark maroons sometimes littered your wardrobe as well. As you got changed you didn’t see the text reading that Namjoon couldn’t make it today. When your door buzzed you let whoever was here, up. When there was a knock at the door you rushed over, your long black dress flowing as much as it could with your long cardigan over it. You slipped your heels on and opened the door.

“Jinnie- “

Chapter 5: I’m Sorry, I’m Late

“Jinnie-“your voice got caught in your throat. There he was, in front of you. His hair was different, but the curves of his face and his moles were exactly where you remembered him. You tried to draw him many times over the past year; you could never perfect him.

“I’m sorry, I’m late.” He spoke, his voice was just as you remembered it. God…

In a shock to yourself your face contorted, “late for what Hyunjin.” Your cold voice stunned you.

“I had a feeling you would be upset with me.” His voice was calm, he looked somewhat different, his hair was blond and long. It was a total 180 from the short choppy dark hair of Jinnie.

“Can I come in?” he asked softly. You took a deep breath and stepped aside. He walked in, his clothes were different too. More chic, he looked expensive.

You walked over to your phone to see that Namjoon asked to reschedule, what rotten timing.

“You still have our piece we made together, over the mantel.” He noted. Your heart wanted to be so mad at him. You were livid, he had left for a year, no words, no letters, nothing. Hyunjin just watched you from afar as you did him. It’s not like you had any way to contact him. He could’ve easily contacted you, but he didn’t.

“Why are you here?” You asked trying to sound stern, it wasn’t real though. When it came to him your heart was on your sleeve. Your cold tortured artist façade now crumbled completely; it always did when your heart missed him.

“I’m here for your exhibit.” He turned around and looked at you, now leaning on the arm of the couch, “your home is nice.”

“My exhibit isn’t until a few days.” Your voice once again slightly quivering. You felt your posture stiffen.

“I know that.” Hyunjin walked toward you, your eyes weren’t on him, but you could hear his shoes. His now expensive, shiny, pointy, stupidly classy shoes.

You finally gained enough courage to look at him, his brown eyes looking straight into you. The rolls were reversed now, your heart was the scared dog.

“I said I was late because I heard from the grape vine about Namjoon visiting for your exhibit.”

Your eyes widened, how? It was one day…

“My friend is friends with Namjoon’s friend. He apparently talks nonstop about you and your work. When Chris, my friend, told me, I came here as soon as possible.” He went to grab your hand and you pushed it away.

“So, you only came here when you found out someone who has an interest in me was now getting to see me?” Obviously, this hurt you. It felt selfish and that wasn’t the Jinnie you knew.

“Y/n you know I don’t mean it like that…” Hyunjin’s voice was pained. It broke you a little more knowing it was because of your own words. You walked past him, and you heard his footsteps following you. Whipping around you poked his chest.

“You didn’t even reach out to me! You bought one of my works second hand! You knew exactly where to find me!” Your voice raised, “I waited for you!”

“I know you did, and I am so sorry, I got caught up in so many schedules. And it was a lot. My parents missed me, and I missed my friends and the next thing I knew- “

“And then you have the absolute AUDACITY to come to my home when I just started getting over you!” You backed him to the edge of the couch again.

Hyunjin looked at you with wide eyes, then they trailed down to your neck, “are you sure about that?” His voice was just above a whisper. Your brows furrowed and your hand came up to touch what his eyes were glued to.

It was the necklace he gave you, in your defense you never take it off. It just became apart of you, just like he did.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice my works wrapped up under the couch either.” He wasn’t walking on eggshells anymore, he was stomping. Your eye twitched.

“What do you even want to get out of this Hyunjin!?” You didn’t look at him.

You felt his warm hand softly grab yours, he was back on eggshells again, his grip was as if you were blown glass.

“I want you just as I always have.”

That was it, there was absolutely no getting over him. Any progress you made in the past year was gone. You looked away from him.

“Please… Look at me…” He was trying not to cry, “say anything please.”

“Not even a text? Or a letter?” Your voice broke, the floodgates had opened wetting your face.

Hyunjin wiped your tears as quickly as they leaked out of his favorite pair of eyes, “I tried, I didn’t know what to say. I will admit I am being impulsive and stupid. I shouldn’t have dropped everything the second I heard Namjoon was going to be at your meeting.”

Your brows furrowed again, and you looked up at him, “you dropped everything?”

“Yes, in a heartbeat, the second Chris told me I booked a plane ticket without telling anyone. I was scared and I couldn’t- I couldn’t let you- “

The anger was back, and you pushed his hands off his face, “you couldn’t let me get over you!?” You turned your back to him and hugged yourself.

“I couldn’t let someone else have you! Y/n, I messed up so badly. I know I did, I hurt you and left you with a stupid note and I didn’t even think about how much it would hurt you in the morning. I was overwhelmed. I should have visited you right when I knew you were here.” Hyunjin was desperately trying to get you to hear him out. Your heart was in a war between loving him and hating him.

Hating him was fueled by how much you were in love with him.

“You have until my exhibit, to fix this. To prove to me that you won’t just leave again with a stupid note.” You turned around and his eyes filled with hope. The same hope before yours and his relationship was tainted.

You ended up having to let Hyunjin stay in your guest room, he didn’t book any kind of hotel or anything. He truly just bought a ticket to France, to you. The rest of that day was spent with him walking around your home and taking what you presumed to be mental notes.

Your outing with Namjoon was going to get rescheduled at your exhibit. At this point, your childish heart wanted the entire Earth to stop so you wouldn’t have to be with anyone but Hyunjin. But the adult brain in you told you that Hyunjin needed to prove that he wouldn’t just leave again.

~*~

The next morning you woke up and flipped over, totally forgetting yesterday’s events. When you heard music playing from your living room you got scared. You sprung up and rushed in, no one was in the living room. It was BRIGHT too, usually you have the curtains closed.

When you entered the kitchen, there he was. You weren’t dreaming.

“Oh, did I wake you?” He turned around, his beautiful face more visible to you now. You mentally thanked the headband he had on.

“No, I just-“ you didn’t know what to say.

“I opened your curtains in the living room and in here, you have beautiful views of the city.” Hyunjin smiled at you and set a plate down at your small table, meant for two.

“You made breakfast?” You asked, eyeing the plate. Your eyes then went up to him, he looked tired, he was still in his pajamas. Hyunjin nodded.

“I am really jetlagged, so it was hard sleeping. I woke up really early and so I made breakfast.” Even through his drowsiness he smiled for you. You mumbled a thank you and sat down. You saw that he made a really good-looking fruit bowl with oatmeal.

“I have hard boiled eggs in the fridge too. All picked up this morning. I didn’t want to use your food without permission.” He said and set down spoons and forks for you both.

“You could have… It’s okay…” Your voice was quiet.

“Do you have any plans today?” Hyunjin asked you. You took a bite of the fruit in the fruit bowl. He even picked the best fruit for you. You shook your head no.

“Would you want to take a walk with me today? I was thinking about getting ice cream or a genuine French Crepe.” He took a sip of his tea.

“Aren’t you worried about being recognized with me? Don’t you have fans?” You took a sip of your tea now.

“Well, don’t you have fans now?” He slyly smiled at you, “I’ve heard some rumors about you.”

You gave him a look, “what do you mean?”

Hyunjin did one of his eye smiles and giggles, “you know at first, I was a little jealous when I heard that everyone in the art scene wanted to court you.” He sipped his tea and wiggled his eyebrows. You couldn’t help the little laugh that escaped you.

“Not everyone.” You looked away, “they stopped after a bit.”

Hyunjin set his glass down which got your attention again, “ah of course they did, you gained the reputation of being unobtainable.”

“Is that what they call me now?” You asked, now taking a spoonful of oatmeal.

“Maybe, I wouldn’t call you that though.”

“Confident, are we?” You asked him.

The man in front of you looked at you, a small huff of a laugh coming out of his nose, “maybe.”

~*~

He held the umbrella for you both as you walked down the busy street with him. A scene your heart never thought would come true.

“Your clothes are darker colors now.” He noted, “they look nice on you.”

You nodded, “thank you, your hair doesn’t look choppy anymore.”

Hyunjin threw his head back and laughed, he almost hit you with the umbrella, “I got scolded and forced to get a haircut, they don’t let me touch it now.”

“Your work?” You questioned. Hyunjin let out a hum of a yes. You frowned, “doesn’t it bother you…? Being put in a box like that?”

“Oh, every day, but it’s worth it when I am on stage, dancing, singing, I missed it truly. I got my spark back.” He spoke with stars in his eyes.

“Well, that’s good then. I am glad your trip helped you appreciate what you have.” You said and pushed your dark sunglasses up again.

“My return though made me miss dearly what I gained on that trip.” Hyunjin said in a hushed voice, near your ear.

You looked at him, as much as you wanted to fight it, your heart belonged to him. It wasn’t time yet though; your mind was still scared.

“The café is up there.” Hyunjin broke eye contact with you then led you to the café.

He ended up ordering for you in French, he spoke with confidence. It was a change from the markets in that oh so small town. You both sat outside after he paid.

“I studied French on my free time when I got back.” Hyunjin spoke and took a bite of his sweet treat.

“I was wondering how you spoke so confidently.” You sipped your hot coffee; you also picked a strawberry off your plate.

“It made me think of you.” He spoke and gave you that stupid eye smile. It was almost torture.

You looked away biting back a smile, he was too charming for his own good. The little things he did were too much. It made your heart win the war over your brain.

“Was the bed warm? In my guest room?” You questioned.

Hyunjin nodded, still smiling at you. He seemed thrilled to just be around you, “mhm!”

“That’s… That’s actually a relief, I don’t usually have overnight guests.” Your lips curved into a smile. You looked up at him and his head was turned in question.

“What?” You asked.

“You don’t have guests?”

You shook your head no, “I don’t have people over like at all. One time my mom visited but that was a few months ago.”

“You don’t get lonely?”

Your mind filled with memories of you sipping wine by yourself, letting a couple tears slip while the fire was the only thing that warmed your body. Quickly you snapped out of it.

“No.” Your answer was short, “I did that before didn’t I?” Correction, you did that before you met Hyunjin. Then he opened your world only to leave you on the dark side of the moon.

“Well, I just thought because your art style changed dramatically. The colors you used were always dark, dark reds, blues, blacks, greys. No more yellow or lavender.” He said simply.

“Do you study my work?”

Hyunjin smiled again at you, with a knowing look, then he shrugged, “finish your coffee its going to get cold.”

~*~

The next day he made you breakfast again, this time it was muffins and fruit. He even cut the fruit into little shapes; you know that he specially hand cut each shape due to the fact you didn’t own any kind of food cutters.

“Good morning!” Hyunjin said cheerfully.

“Did you rest well?” You asked sitting down, Hyunjin nodded.

“I slept a lot better than last night; I usually get over jet lag pretty quickly so.” He set your food down and sat down next to you, “I also made peppermint tea this morning.”

“Thank you…” You felt your face warm and the small butterflies erupted from your chest to your heart.

“So today, are you busy with anything?” Hyunjin asked, you took a bite of your muffin. It was pumpkin.

“Did you make these?” You looked at him, it tasted exactly like your pumpkin bread. Hyunjin nodded with a grin.

“We made it so much that when I had free time, I wrote down the recipe. I used to make it in my dorm whenever I missed you. Let’s just say I gave my friend who actually bakes a run for his money.” He giggled and took a bite of his muffin.

“That’s… Really sweet of you…” You spoke quietly, you saw Hyunjin smile warmly to himself. Part of you knew he truly does love you as much as you still love him. Your mind was starting to forgive him. Your mind then went to his original question.

“I only have a small meeting today for the food being served at my exhibit.” You ate some fruit.

“May I come with you?” Hyunjin asked. Your mind fought it and thought it over. Your heart once again won.

“I think your insight will help.” Your words came off warm. You saw Hyunjin’s eyes widen a bit at your kind tone, then he smiled.

~*~

Once more he held your umbrella as you two walked, today it was actually raining so you actually needed the covering.

“I don’t think it will rain the day of your exhibit.” Hyunjin’s feet slapped against the stone streets of Paris.

“You looked up the weather?” Your eyes looked up at him. Part of him was offended and you can tell.

“Can you please stop being so surprised that I do the bare minimum?” He looked down at you, he didn’t want to start an argument. As he was a man who preferred to communicate and say his emotions. He could never hold in how he was feeling, and you remembered that. One time you two had a small argument in the small town, he just said how he was feeling.

“I’m sorry I am just trying to- I don’t even know. You’re right I need to have more faith in you.” You didn’t look at him anymore, “It’s really wrong of me to assume that you are going to do the worse.” You swallowed, you didn’t want to cry. But he was right. Hyunjin sighed and pulled you to the side of the sidewalk, under an awning. The rain was starting to get loud.

“Y/n you have every right to be cautious of me. I understand what I did and I shouldn’t have just-“

“Hyunjin…” You looked up at him, “you are right, I need to be more open minded, you were never wrong to me in that small town and you didn’t have a choice to leave. You said so in your note.” You dug through your purse and grabbed your wallet.

“What’re you…?”

You kept digging until you pulled out his note, the one he left you at your small cottage, “you said yourself you wanted to take me with you, but you were shot down.”

“You keep it with you…?”

Your eyes looked away from him and to the note that was in your hands, “yes I keep it with me…”

Hyunjin’s hand touched yours and he took a deep breath, “I’m still so sorry.”

“It’s okay… Again, I know you didn’t have a choice, and I know you were so busy with your life and I started to become busy too and our lives just got so complicated… I need to stop being so cold to you…” Your voice was shaky, and you took a deep breath.”

“Hey… It’s okay…” Hyunjin’s hand slowly and cautiously went to your cheek. You looked up at him, he smiled at you, “hi.”

Your heart loved the view in front of you and so did your mind, “hi.”

“Let’s get to the meeting, okay? We don’t want to be late.”

That’s what you two did, you made it in one piece even in the rain. The meeting consisted of different cheese and wine tastings. Hyunjin would giggle at you everytime your face scrunched from the strong wine flavor and you would laugh at him when the cheese he ate tasted bad.

“You said this one tasted good!” Hyunjin pouted while you were giggling evilly.

“I thought it tasted great… Maybe your taste buds are broken.” You said smugly.

Hyunjin’s jaw dropped and he looked stunned, “MY taste buds!? You like bad cheese apparently!” He said loudly. You had to quiet him down while laughing. You two got a little tipsy while trying all the wine, you were nowhere near drunk, but you could feel a little buzz. You and Hyunjin were just constantly laughing at everything. In your heart you felt that this was perfect, you could live every day with him if you could. Before you two headed out you both made sure to drink water and have a couple slices of bread. Much to Hyunjin’s excitement.

When you two decided on the little snacks and drinks for your exhibit you two started your walk home, together. The buzz was starting to wear off which was good. Being publicly intoxicated could ruin both your public image, as if being alone together wasn’t enough to stir controversy. That fear wasn’t on either of your minds though, at least not at the moment. You and Hyunjin were both drunk on each other’s company.

“I cannot believe you made me try that gross cheese!” Hyunjin said as you two walked on the sidewalk. The rain started to clear up, so he didn’t bother opening the umbrella.

“You tried to get me drunk!” You joked back, Hyunjin dramatically gasped.

“I would never! You drank the same amount as me!” He placed his hand over his heart. You let out a laugh and through your head back. You missed this so much, you missed him so much. You and Hyunjin exchanged glances at each other as you two walked and talked.

“You know I wonder how our neighbor is…” You thought to yourself.

“Gram?” Hyunjin asked and cocked his head to the side.

You nodded and messed with the rings on your fingers, “I still feel guilty for just leaving and selling everything.”

“I am sure she would understand, maybe we could invite her to your exhibit!” Hyunjin suggested, your eyes lit up.

“That is such a good idea!” You grinned up at him, Hyunjin gave you a funny but endearing look.

“I think we should…-“ His voice trailed off and he looked in front of him. Your eyes followed him but before he could figure it out, he pulled you into the alley and started rushing.

“What is this about?” You felt yourself giggle a little and you let him lead you. You were still in love with him, you couldn’t help it.

“I think someone recognized one or both of us.” He turned three corners in the small alley and stopped to look around.

“So, you dragged us into a sketchy ally?” You felt yourself laugh at him, he looked down at you confused and then looked around.

“I guess I did… I panicked, okay?” You could tell he was a little embarrassed, once again you let a giggle slip out.

“I just don’t want to have to leave again.” Hyunjin spoke softly, his voice was quiet. Your eyes softened when you looked at him.

“You think they’d follow you again?” Your curiosity peaked. Hyunjin gave you a look and nodded.

“Oh yeah, they will follow me to the ends of the Earth. I mean my brothers would, they aren’t actually blood brothers but they are the closest I have to them.” He was rambling, it made you forget you two were in some random alleyway.

“Will I ever get to meet them?” You looked up at him and leaned against the wall. Hyunjin looked down at you.

“You want to meet them?”

You nodded, “well of course I would. They’re important to you, are they not?”

“Yeah… Yeah they are.” Hyunjin’s eyes kept staring into yours. His mind was running a mile a minute. You felt the rain start again, it was only a sprinkle and it felt nice. You looked up still leaning on the wall taking in the nice weather. You could hear Hyunjin breathe through his nose, and you looked up at him again. His brows were furrowed, and he looked frustrated.

“Are you okay?” You asked, now you were genuinely concerned.

“Please…” He mumbled, now it was your turn to look confused. The rain started to become heavy again, soaking both of you.

You heard Hyunjin mumble something and then look away.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t hear you because of the rain.” You spoke.

“Please let me kiss you again.”

In the middle of the sketchy alleyway, you let him kiss you. The war between your mind and heart was over, they made a truce to love Hyunjin.

And only Hyunjin.

~*~

The next morning you woke up to Hyunjin next to you, he was still sound asleep. Hyunjin looked so peaceful, it was just like when you woke up next to him in that little cottage of yours. Except now you two are older. His face was illuminated by the sun bouncing off your white walls. He was beautiful. You think if you ever spent a year without him again you would be heartbroken forever.

You carefully slipped out of bed, making sure that you wouldn’t wake him. You got up and did your morning routine and called your manager, you had an idea.

“Hello Miss L/n.” Your manager said cheerfully, “what do I owe the pleasure?” Her voice was always so powerful.

“Do you remember the first exhibit when my work started to become popular?” You asked as you went through the fridge to make pancakes for you and Hyunjin.

“Ah yes, the one that was meant for Mr. W’s student Sam. But then Sam couldn’t make it?” Your manager always remembered; it was probably because you paid her to do so but still.

“Yes, that one, I want to put those pieces out again this next exhibit. I have Hyu- Sam, here with me. I would like him to see his work in an exhibit.” You spoke and started to stir the pancake mix.

“How kind of you Miss L/n.” You heard her type from the other end, “I will add that to your exhibit and the pamphlet. This afternoon I will send someone over to pick up yours and Mr. Sam’s.”

“Thank you.”

Your manager started typing again and hummed to herself, “alright, they will be there in the afternoon.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Jean.”

You said your goodbyes and continued to make breakfast, blueberry pancakes and coffee. Smiling to yourself you started to flip the pancakes. You jumped when you felt arms slowly snake around you.

“Good morning.” Hyunjin mumbled and buried his head in your shoulder.

“Morning Jinnie.”

Hyunjin giggled and buried his head more in your shoulder, “I missed that.”

You hummed and he didn’t let go of you while you cooked. You moved to the right, Hyunjin moved to the right. You took a step back, Hyunjin took a step back.

“Breakfast smells great.” Hyunjin was still very sleepy, you could tell.

“I am glad, I figured I would make up for you making breakfast the past couple days.” You laughed out of your nose.

“You don’t have to make anything up for me.” He finally let go of you when the food was done and set.

“Oh, I have someone coming over today to pick up some artwork for the exhibit. Do you mind running errands?” You asked and sipped your hot coffee. You put creamer in it, Hyunjin didn’t put creamer in his. You took note of that.

He pouted, “why can’t I be here?”

You gave him a look, “Can you please just trust me. Pleaaaase.” You pouted back. Hyunjin groaned and took a bite of his pancake, after he drowned it in syrup, of course.

“Jinni-“

“Yes. I can run errands, anything for you.”

Your smile widened and you giggled at how much of a lovesick dork he was. It was hypocritical of you to laugh though, you were the same lovesick dork for him. You always were.

~*~

The day of your exhibit rolled around and you woke Hyunjin up.

“Get up we have to get ready!” You grinned.

“My ticket isn’t until 6pm.” Hyunjin rolled over again, his beautiful form facing you. You shook him again.

“Don’t you want to walk into my exhibit holding hands with me?”

You have never in your life seen someone get ready THAT quickly.

“Blue or black suit?” Hyunjin asked.

You looked up at him. He had light makeup on and his hair was pulled back in a ponytail, he looked divine already. He could show up in his pajamas and he would look so good.

“Blue, navy blue.” You said and looked back at your vanity, you were deciding how to do your hair and makeup.

“Is that because you’re wearing navy blue.” He teased. Your face grew hot.

“Noooo…” You mumbled, he let out a loud obnoxious laugh that you were in love with.

You finished getting ready and you waited for him by the door, adjusting your hat and sunglasses. As much as wearing sunglasses indoors made you kind of look like an asshole, you became known to do so. You started wearing them at your first exhibit, it was so people couldn’t see you crying over Hyunjin and how you wanted him to be there so badly. You took a deep breath, maybe it was time to ditch the sunglasses.

“You look beautiful.” Hyunjin said from behind you and looked at you in the mirror, “can we take a photo?”

You nodded and looked up at him, he whipped out his phone and took a mirror selfie with you. He took a few photos, one of him kissing the side of your head, one of him holding you, another one of him actually kissing you. He would have memories and photos of you with him.

“We are going to be late Jinnie.” You laughed. He nodded and you two headed out to the driver.

~*~

When you two arrived early you talked to your manager and introduced her to Hyunjin. She was very excited to meet this other artist. Just like you, she fell in love with his art too. Mrs. Jean was also clearly scouting for another client. It made you smile with pride. You were always so proud of Hyunjin. They ended up talking about art, thank god your manager kept the surprise. She was clearly trying to sell him on becoming a client, part of you hoped so. That meant he would have to come to Paris more. Which means he could see you more.

Time passed and people started showing up to your shared exhibit. When you walked around and people chatted with you, you saw Hyunjin was chatting with a group of men that you recognized as people from his group. He didn’t look tense around them, and it didn’t seem like he was in too much trouble for running away again.

You sipped on your champagne and grabbed a couple of cheese slices from the table.

“Good evening.” You looked to your side and saw Namjoon. Uh ohhh. You smiled warmly, trying not to panic. You ended up setting your little cheese plate to the side.

“Oh! Hi Namjoon!” You were really trying not to panic. I mean you guys didn’t even go out, you had tea with him once.

“Your exhibit is really beautiful! I am excited to go through the rest of it.” He smiled at you.

“Thank you, Namjoon that means a lot.” You smiled, he smiled back and before you knew it you felt a hand on your waist.

“Oh my god I know you.” Hyunjin said and put his hand out, Namjoon shook it.

“You’re an idol too, right?” Namjoon spoke, “part of that group Stray Kids?”

Hyunjin nodded and shook his hand back, “yes, I am Hyunjin.”

“Ahhhh yes you are talked about a lot, I have heard your name float around before.” Hyunjin shrugged with a sly smile. You could help but roll your eyes at Hyunjin being childish.

Hyunjin and Namjoon talked a little about work before Namjoon excused himself to look at the rest of the exhibit.

“I have something to show you.” You grabbed Hyunjin’s hand with your free hand. You set your champagne down. Hyunjin smiled at you and nodded. You led him to the part of your exhibit that was dedicated to him. You saw as his eyes widened and he looked at you then back at his artwork. They were still in pristine condition.

“You didn’t get to see your work in an exhibit, I wanted to make that up to you.” You said quietly. Hyunjin looked at you like you were the world to him. He was at a loss for words.

“Do you like it?” You asked, scared you overstepped.

“Y/n… I love it…” He mumbled, still in shock, “I love you so much. I-“

You watched, heart beating out of your chest as he got down on one knee. Your mouth was agape. He pulled out a small box, the ring shining under the exhibit lights.

“I was planning to do this after the exhibit but my heart is telling me there is no other perfect time for this. I love you, y/n. I will make up for the time lost for the rest of my life with you. I thought about you every day and I will continue to only think of you every day. I want you to be my future, you already are my everything. My intended. Will you please marry me.”

Maybe you should have worn your sunglasses because you were crying over Jinnie again, but not because of sadness.

“Yes Jinnie!”

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spockandstars · 1 year ago

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I think that a lot of people take issue with the way the Spock/Chapel/T'Pring love triangle is presented in Strange New Worlds, but that sometimes this is dismissed as fans just being bitter spirk shippers. So here are a few reasons why I believe people are iffy on this plotline. (Disregarding the fact that we're disappointed that the showrunners didn't, and most likely won't, take the chance to do something really cool with Spock's legacy as a queer coded character...)

Firstly, it takes time away from other characters to address an element of Spock's story that has already been explored beautifully. (I will get into how this treats Chapel and T'Pring later...) Spock's struggle with his humanity and his anguish over the depth of his feelings for others (particularly Jim) is a focus in TOS and the movies, and if you're going to keep on talking about it, at least do it in a more creative way? This isn't to say that it shouldn't be acknowledged at all, seeing that it is a lifelong struggle for him, but by making it such a focus of the series they're not giving other interesting characters as much of a chance to develop.

Additionally, it has traditionally been understood that Spock coped with his inner turmoil by repressing his feelings. Over the course of his lifetime, he learns to embrace his human side more to become a more balanced and healthy person. SNW takes the approach of "young Spock was more human and horny!" which isn't necessarily bad, but they better be giving us an explanation for how he transforms so dramatically to the extremely repressed character he is in TOS. Maybe this is reaching too far, but this whole approach of young Spock just feels like an excuse to get hot ladies into his bed and to fulfill the fantasies of nerdy men who project onto him. This is the same Spock who scoffed at the idea of going to see dancers at a bar, who was immune to the charms of the sexy ladies in Mudd's Women, who only entertained women when drugged or when he needed to do so for a mission...

Furthermore, I believe it's a disservice to Chapel. On one hand, it does make her love for Spock seem more grounded in reality, which I appreciate. In TOS, it's pretty clear that Spock doesn't share her feelings and her crush is only really ever used as a means of ridiculing her. There goes silly Chapel again, trying to win over her unrequited love! It's not cool. But on the same token, making Spock the focus of her character yet again only further reduces her to nothing but that. Why can't we let the girl breathe and do other stuff? Sure, she does get some of the AOS Uhura treatment where she gets to be a generic cool badass lady, but this is in a way that is lacking in any real depth. Chapel deserves better.

I also don't love the way it treats T'Pring. Was it really necessary for her to be Spock's eye candy wife that he gets to bang and cheat on? In Amok Time, it's heavily implied that this was an arranged thing and that they hadn't seen each other since they were seven. If they really felt the need to include this relationship, it would have been so much cooler if they had explored it from that angle, with neither of them truly wanting to be together but being forced into it by societal expectation. Which of course, results in T'Pring using her intelligence to gain her freedom in Amok Time.

So yeah. Those are my main gripes with this whole thing. Overall, I think it's lazy writing that allows the writers to benefit from the nostalgia of legacy characters without developing them in actually meaningful or revolutionary ways.

#stange new worlds #star trek strange new worlds #star trek snw #snw #s'chn t'gai spock #spock #t'pring #christine chapel #meta #my post #spirk #k/s #star trek tos

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carnallysm · 2 months ago

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The Hunger.

Media Liaison Jennifer Jareau / Psychiatrist! Dark! Reader helping at the BAU. (Inspired by Hannibal NBC).

Settled in earlier seasons, but doesn't necessarily follow canon events strictly.

This is an AU.

Beware of typical in canon content such as: murder and cannibalism mentions, overall dark content. There's also some smut towards the end!

— Summary: "Jennifer Jareau is no profiler. She can't tell, like the rest of her team (except Garcia), what exactly means if someone socks are unmatched.

But she understands people, in her own way. A more natural one. A more consuming one.

You, the BAU's new hired psychiatrist to help the members with their mental health, will be the most consuming person Jennifer ever met."

It wasn't a wound, much less a profound one that Jennifer Jareau felt her heart had. Instead, each and every string that formed her heart was intact.

No one ever truly saw it, what's within her. Jennifer herself is sure she doesn't want to know what hides beneath the mask she's had plastered on her face since so many years.

What she knows is there's a hole in her heart; a bottomless black hole that she's been trying to fill for just as many years as she has been wearing a mask wherever she went to.

Nonetheless, Jennifer is happy with her life. It's the kind of life she had to live, for her family back then and for her family now. The BAU gave JJ that: a family. One that was always there, unlike her mother. Unlike her sister...

Thoughts about death must be inevitable in her job, that's what Jennifer thinks. Seeing, catching, interviewing, chasing serial killers all up and down the States would have an effect on everyone.

She thought so until she met you.

Carrying yourself with an air of gracefulness, and yet easy to talk to. There was something about you that simply made JJ uneasy. You never even flinched at the bodies — and even so, you were unbelievably gentle with the victims, offering them sessions of therapy for free.

What about you was what made a cold shiver run through her spine whenever your eyes met?

Her blue eyes reflecting your appearance, always formal at job while at the same time not enough to seem too snob. Every time she talked with you, it was like her heart opened; for better and worse.

"I don't find you that interesting." Jennifer didn't exactly lie, because more than interesting alone, she found you interestingly terrifying.

Because you opened her heart, tired apart all the strings that protected it, and filled the hole that was there the same way she did to you.

Your heart, that you felt so cold and alone. You always knew you were alone, despite all the people who praised your work. None of them knew you, your deepness — or the deepness of your hollowness. That was filled by Jennifer Jareau, someone so kind and yet so frustratingly unaware of her own self.

"You will." You responded to her with a small nod, before taking a piece of sausage you made for breakfast for both of you. An special one, even if Jennifer was unaware of that as well.

It was only the beginning of the love, the first person you didn't want to consume physically, but emotionally and completely. Someone to consume with, perhaps. JJ, you were sure, was the only person who would understand.

But first, you had to pull her where you wanted her. Made her realize things, realize everything about death and love.

"My parents died when I was very young," You confessed in one of your therapy sessions with Jennifer, being the psychiatrist hired for the BAU members. "Taking care of my sister wasn't easy, but I loved her."

You immediately took account of JJ's softening features, the curves of her mouth frowning into a saddened expression. She understands, you know, even if you're not fully being honest with her.

But Jennifer understands loss the same as you.

"My sister died when I was eleven, and..." JJ had to take a couple of seconds to have a deep breath, faintly shaking her head to clear the few tears gathering in her eyes. "I froze when I saw her in the bathroom. That's why I swore to never freeze again."

She raised a hand to softly, almost barely actually touching and more like caressing the necklace she was wearing, the one that used to belong to her sister.

That's all she had left of her sister, and for the first time in God knows how much, you felt sorry for her. You carried your sister everywhere, while Jennifer had to conform with a simple necklace.

It was simply pitiful.

Meanwhile, you kept doing your work both at day and night, and serving the pigs that your victims were to your teammates. They didn't know, of course. But it was delicious to see how they all, unknownly so, enjoyed and cherished your dishes.

It speaks on its own.

To love is to consume, in some way or another. You consumed the reminiscences of your sister for love, and now you take pigs down for their rudeness.

That's love, too. The more pigs you haunt and eat, the less criminals there are that could kill like they killed your sister. It's all about love, at the end, and you only ever felt such thing for your long-time sister forming part inside of you now, and for Jennifer.

You never felt actually lonely before. You were sure you couldn't find someone who would chain you to this despairing world. Now Jennifer Jareau became your tether to life, and you became the same for her. She made all the cracks open in you, all the cracks that craved with never-ending hunger to be known, seen, loved.

Even if JJ can't accept the love, the violence that it's love between the two of you, because for sure it's inconvenient, you don't doubt what you two feel for each other for even a second.

Because right now, when her lips are devouring yours, you can feel every single thing that's inside of her.

There's no need for words.

She craves you — you, who are everything she always stood away from. Who are what she swore she'll always fight against. Who she hates loving, but who made her feel whole, finally complete in ways she couldn't understand.

She bit your lower lip, and blood spilled from it like a fountain with the statue of an angel pouring water in a scenery, except it was the blood of you, the devil who caught the deer and showed her a different way to love.

And Jennifer licked your blood, as if a starving wolf licked the guts of the rabbit he just ravaged.

When your back met the wall of JJ's room, you felt her hand forcefully tearing off your blouse as her lips never left yours; you were desperate for air, and so hungry for her at the same time you couldn't think straight.

Rather, your mind was focused on the pain and pleasure combining in an explosion of the only thing you ever knew: blood. Blood, in this moment with JJ was passion for you both, and frustration for her as well.

Her lips made their way down with deep bites alongside your jaw and collarbone as she pulled down your slightly bloodied underwear, exposing your breasts.

And as she pinched one of your nipples with one hand, biting harshly the other one, more blood came from you. Not much, but the trail of it falling from your breast to your stomach was as heated as JJ's touch was.

"You're so warm." It was a mere murmur in between all the chaos, probably never even meant to be heard, but it heightened your pleasure.

Warm. You were never called warm, no matter that people liked you. This is how love feels to you, warm. And to Jennifer, is the same. Warm, as in blood, as in guts, as in viscera and intestines.

She still doesn't even know what you do, but she'll find out soon. When that happens, you're dying to know JJ's reaction to it.

But for now, you're enjoying her hand sliding under your pants and pulling them down with a clear urgency; the urgency to be one, to be seen for what was also part of her. To see you, who was now part of her.

Her fingers found your damped underwear easily, circling around your clit for some moments. Your breath grew heavy, and you wondered if this is what felt like dying. Losing your breath, your control, your everything at the hands of someone or something surrounding all of you.

Once Jennifer's fingers fully and roughly pressed to your clit through your underwear, a louder whine escaped your lips before she made you quiet by kissing you once more. It was still as harsh, abrasively so, and it felt like fire was consuming the two of you.

The coolness of the wall was no more effective to keep your mind somewhat straight, not like you wanted to when JJ almost savagely pulled down your panties, and her fingers traced your wet entrance for a single second, before pushing two fingers inside you without warning.

Your hands were holding tightly on JJ's shoulders, as your head moved back in pleasure with a whimper, your back arching for more of that pleasant sensation.

The more you felt her, the more you understood her.

JJ, who always lived up to the expectations of others, was free for the first time in her life. Throughout your therapy sessions with her, you were able to conclude that, proving you wrong, someone out there was the same as you.

Someone living a lie. Someone who had potential to be your equal. Someone to whom death and love were hand in hand.

JJ's two fingers stroking and pumping inside of your throbbing cunt as you came only made you further sure of that.

All the time spent preparing JJ for this very moment was worth it, because she finally accepted herself. And she accepted you. She accepted her own twisted mind and yours.

"I have a very special dinner for us," You spoke in between heavy panting, barely calming down from your orgasm. "You'll see me, and you'll see yourself. Who we are. Together."

What was waiting in your basement was an unsub you couldn't put in jail for not having enough proper evidence. The meal to ultimately conclude your love with Jennifer Jareau.

Note: I will probably write more fanfics about this idea, such as JJ's past therapy sessions with reader and how it developed.

#criminal minds #jennifer jareau #criminal minds fandom #jennifer jareau x reader #jennifer jareau smut #criminal minds smut #jj x reader #jj smut #jennifer jareau x you

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room-surprise · 10 months ago

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Hi, hope it's ok to ask some stuff about your thoughts on mithrun (not sure if it got asked before). But do you think mithrun and his brother might've had a good relationship the beginning? Like when they were really young, maybe even before mithrun noticed the different treatment his parents did to him and his brother. Also do you think that the former mithrun was really in love with that elf? Cause after reading mithrun's part in the adventure bible I'm starting to have a few doubts, esp since that chibi look a like of the elf in question is being described as untrustworthy. Like maybe former mithrun was only into them cause his older brother also seemed to fancy them?

It's always fine to ask me stuff! Though I might not always have time to answer, I love seeing people's questions!!!

I don't know if you've read any of my fics, but I do go into what I think Mithrun and his brother's relationship was like as children in both "Show Me How to Get Off the Ground" (College AU) in chapter 2, and the short fic "A (Fairy) Phone Call Between Brothers."

In summary: I think when they were very young, Mithrun didn't realize that there was something "wrong" with his brother. He was just his best friend, his playmate, they spent all their time together and so of course they were very close. Just the two of them living on a big country estate, while a plague raged through the population - not a lot of chances for play-dates with children outside of their family.

Once Mithrun was old enough to get sent away to boarding school (so around 50 years old - 10 in human terms) he quickly realized that being like his brother (disabled) meant being cast aside and discarded... So he started to put distance between them, and the older they got the colder Mithrun was towards his brother.

I think that Mithrun felt guilty and ashamed for abandoning his brother (similar to how Laios felt guilty for abandoning Falin)... and the fact that his brother kept acting like they were loving siblings made the guilt even worse, and turned it into anger and resentment.

As for the mysterious elf (gender unknown) that Mithrun and his brother were both interested in... No, I don't think Mithrun ever truly loved them. Like you said, Mithrun thought that the snake spouse elf wasn't trustworthy, so I assume that means he thought they were a gold digger. Somebody that was only interested in Mithrun and his brother because their family is very wealthy.

I think Mithrun ignored his own desires (wanting to date, or have sex with the snake spouse) because he thought they were a bad match, that his parents wouldn't approve, or that they were dangerous to his social status...

So when the magic mirror showed him his brother happy with the snake spouse, Mithrun was overwhelmed with jealousy and regret. He worries about if he misjudged the snake spouse. What if they were actually wonderful, and now Mithrun has missed out on the love of his life because he thought he was too good for them? And now his brother has them instead?

I think Mithrun's story is complicated, and Kui tends to suggest things rather than explicitly tell us what happened, so there's a lot of things to speculate about, and different ways you could read it all.

Thanks for writing to me and asking! It was fun to answer <3

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dunmeshi #mithrun #dungeon meshi spoilers #misrun #misurn #theories

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lavendertales · 1 year ago

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Fire breather**

pairing: young!Din Djarin x f!reader

summary: he knows that even being around you is dangerous, forbidden even. But he can't fight against it for the life of him, not when you lure him with the most innocent of moves that throw you both into an intoxicatingly erotic game.

word count: 6k

WARNINGS: mini crisis of faith; virgin!Din, mutual pining, blowjob, piv, praise kink, cum play, first time shenanigans.

AGELESS/EMPTY BLOGS & MINORS WILL BE BLOCKED!

gif: @manny-jacinto

read on AO3

It started out tentatively. Teasing to an almost ridiculous degree.

As a new bounty hunter, Din sought work. And for a beginner, Nevarro isn’t the worst place to be: plenty of questionable thieves, seemingly charitable folk on the street with dark pasts—a truly varied pool of work for someone like him. He almost-too-eagerly joined Greef Karga’s parsec of bounty hunters, and quickly learned the hazards of the job.

But he also learned there was beauty to it.

Whenever he had spare time, he liked to sit in the local cantina. Not necessarily for the food, but for the people. Simply watching them as they walked by, enjoying a warm meal, a good drink and a polite conversation. For the most part, it was a radiating canvas for young Din Djarin—most of the time unsoiled by the dark desires and past times that possessed so many creatures.

Then he saw you.

He watched your cat-like movements from behind the bar, serving those who stopped by, always with a smile. The more he dared to gaze in your direction, never forgetting to look away just as you sensed his visor upon you, the more he felt a certain fascination for you. Something about you exuded warmth, a rather mysterious sensuality, that of a foreigner, which Din knew had the ravishing possibility of getting him in trouble if he got too close.

So he didn’t. He observed you from afar, never uttering more than a grumbled “thank you” when you serviced him.

He meets with Karga to discuss business. It’s always business; nothing more, nothing less. He sneaks a glance at you, so quick it nearly makes his head spin. He finds himself lost in your smile, your politeness with even the rudest customers, your agility. His helmet suddenly feels constricting.

“Mando? Are you okay under there?”

Even Karga seems to notice. Din gulps, nodding his head ever so stoic, and resumes the conversation about the puck he’s taking today. But today is different. Today, you catch his visor, eyes big and radiant, and you smile at him.

You fucking smile at him.

“Be sure to finish this mission before the heatwave hits Nevarro,” Karga warns. “Seems it’ll be quite a hot season this year.”

Din finishes the mission a few days after said heatwave hit Nevarro. And it sure as hell was hot.

It was one of the rare circumstances when he wishes to done his tunic and beskar and jump into a body of water. It seldom happens, and yet now, he finds himself craving some release from that asphyxiating sensation.

“You’re back.”

The voice, soft and sweet like honey slowly drizzling on skin, startles him. He turns to meet your radiant face welcoming him back on the planet and into the cantina, and he gulps. His throat is so dry it’s itchy.

“You’ve been gone some time,” you say politely.

“Tricky mission.”

“Bounty hunter, right?”

“Yes. You keep tabs on all your clients?”

You chuckle, and the sound is playful, crystal clear, almost causing him to gasp.

“Only the most interesting ones,” you smile. “Can I get you anything?”

His mind feels scrambled, emptied of all other wishes. All except for one, clear and concise, and yet so terribly frightening to even think, let alone voice.

“I’m okay, thank you,” he replies.

“Some water at least. This heat is no joke.”

Eventually he nods, his eyes glued to your figure from the second you depart until you return with a tall cup of ice water.

“I’ll give you some privacy,” you tell him.

Din feels astounded at your understanding. Unlike others, you don’t question his armor or his habits, you simply… understand. You have enough respect for him already to know when to walk away.

And that awakens something else in him.

In the twisted and explosive world Din had voluntarily stepped in, his infatuation for you unfolds agonizingly slow, and yet far too fast for him to catch up and attempt to understand it.

The manifestation of Eros happens in increments, over long weeks of heat and simple words exchanged: from the lingering, curious gaze you began to return, to the mouth-watering way he longed to touch you. Just once, just a light touch over your arm, nothing more.

A lot more, actually. But Din forbids himself from thinking that far.

It is an erotic and mystical experience, unknown to him. He hasn’t felt the touch of another being, ever, but this he can learn to recognize that he ardently wants. There are moments of insecurity that go beyond his Creed and everything he had sworn himself to. Moments of jealousy of the infatuated man beneath the Mandalorian armor, failing to understand how someone can just touch another’s arm so innocently, so tenderly, and awaken such animalistic instincts in another.

He sees the guy at the bar, shamelessly smiling at you, at one point even laughing. Din’s heart stills, his breaths barely there. He watches the guy touch your hand, hold it for a few seconds longer than he has to, and Din finds his fist curled into a fit of rage. He does and says nothing. What could he say or do? Besides, he has no right to intervene. You aren't his to be had, and he isn't anything more but another client.

“Is everything okay?”

Din is taken aback by the fact that you take a seat right in front of him. You seem to be able to read him easily, and that thought alone is as surprising as it is scary.

“Yes,” Din almost groans.

“Are you sure? Because it looks like you’re about to rip your own gloves.”

He glances down at his hands, both curled into fists so tight he fails to acknowledge that they feel bothersome. He instantly relaxes them, taking a deep breath as you smile reassuringly at him.

“Long day,” he retorts, trying to appear as careless as possible.

Then, the unthinkable happens. You reach and touch his hand, stroking the glove gently, with the same kind and understanding smile on your face.

You touched his hand. It burned his skin through the fabric, his cheeks turning crimson under the weight of flattery and desire.

What is happening to me? Din can't help but ask himself.

“If you need some company, a conversation or… anything, really… you know where to find me.”

As you say so, you stroke his hand one last time and return behind the bar, glancing at him on occasion. Din gulps, struggling to manage for the rest of the day. Had his jealousy been that obvious that you had to come over to soothe him?

No, it couldn’t have been that.

He likes to think of himself as a smart man. Not possessing a superior intellect, but definitely smart, quick to come up with solutions when needed, even impulsively so.

And so he knows that the basis of this attraction he carries for you is nothing but physical. No other explanation for it. It’s pure biology; he can’t really help the way his body sweats and aches for you, let alone the way he just stiffened when his eyes met yours and when you touched him. He felt confined in his own armor, in his own pants, like he couldn’t breathe.

And you only just touched his hand.

It’s simple biology. Action and reaction; excessive nervousness, a celibacy record of twenty four years and counting, internal restlessness and a horrid fear of what the future might look like should he succumb to—whatever this is. He grows more and more fearful of the day he’ll finally snap and his body will take the reins of his feelings and needs, but the precarious situation actually thrills him, and he can’t explain himself. Not anymore.

Din knows he’s a moral man—or so he tries to be—but the demon inside, acting on biological, needy grounds, tempted and proved him the opposite with each moment he spent in your presence. You’ve barely lived, much like him, and yet there lives a refined sensuality and confidence about you, as well as a perplexing innocence inside of you.

He’s used to a different type of feminine behavior, and everything about you thoroughly confuses and excites him.

As the heat thrives in Nevarro, Din feels like he’s falling apart with each day.

No other woman has ever troubled him this much. He’s never been disrupted from his job by anyone, much less a woman. The sensual suffering you unknowingly put him through is beginning to feel like a curse, and this weather isn’t helping either.

He thinks about you when he’s chasing down his targets. He thinks about you when he carbon-freezes them. He thinks about you when he can’t sleep, then he gets so hard it actually feels like he’s being strangled. He thinks about you when he washes the day’s exhaustion off, and his hand seems to act of its own accord and curls itself around his erection, mindlessly stroking in hopes of some release. He seldom feels his own flesh in times like these; if he would’ve cut himself right now, he wouldn’t feel a fucking thing. And yet, what he does feel are his own nerves like a fishnet of beskar, weighing heavily upon him. He’s practically trembling as he rushes to finish himself in the shower, his ragged breath like molten lava. Even after he spills his seed, ashamed of such specific thoughts, you do not leave his mind.

Is it the mystery of your body, the curiosity that comes attached whenever you’re nearby?

He doesn’t know, and he certainly doesn’t care.

After his parents’ demise, Din was raised in a tough environment, one meant for a warrior. And that’s what he became: a hunter of beskar, cold and calculated, sharp. Yet there you are in that cantina, drawing him into a complicated, decisively erotic and unpredictable game. A lingering gaze from either of you is a code that must be deciphered; a touch of the hands is an act of bravery and a betrayal of one’s ways of thinking.

What of the Creed? What of everything I sworn myself too? I can’t fall in this trap, I can’t abandon my family.

But if it’s wrong, why does he ache for you with his whole being?

When you intentionally touched his leg one time as he sat at a table with Karga, it meant a big promise to him, an invitation. The promise was later fortified by a tea that you made especially for him to help with his restlessness.

And it fucking worked.

Din slept the best he had in months, thinking of you as he drifted into a peaceful sleep.

The next day, he brought you flowers as a thank you, but most importantly, as a little gesture to mean “I accept your invitation”. You smiled and thanked him.

Plenty of the customers around noticed you received flattery from the Mandalorian and plenty teased you about it, but you didn’t care. You felt like he could trust you, and being offered the trust of such a skilled warrior was more flattering than anything else.

Of course, there was the issue of attraction. There was no denying that over the months you had developed a rather carnal desire for the covered man. His modulated voice was softer when he spoke to you, almost shy; his movements, usually harsh and brutal, were tender and careful, hesitant as if he were afraid to not break you—or perhaps he was afraid of breaking himself. You began to fear that the physical attraction was too powerful to be contained and that one day you’ll snap, revealing or doing something that’ll put him off.

That was the last thing that you wanted. And, unbeknownst to you, it was the last thing Din wanted, too.

The situation is twisted, to put it mildly; Din, more simplistic in his all-too-new desires, lets himself be tempted by the potential of an affair that could end in tragedy. He’s become obsessed by myths, tearing them down, and new sensations. The observations he makes about body language in particular and the suggestion of foreign sensuality, with its heavy moments of infatuation, are stronger.

The erotic myth that Din finds himself drawn to is unfolding in the most unusual situations: when you smile at him during a busy day in the cantina, when you welcome him after a mission, when he accidentally touches your arm or your leg and his whole body trembles with fear and excitement alike. The now love he carries for you awakens raw, animalistic feelings inside of him, and the inevitable sin happens one evening when he seeks you.

The cantina is empty by this hour, except for one drunken Mythrol in a chair somewhere in the back. Although Din’s pulse is through the roof and he hears his own thrumming in his ears, burning auburn at this point, he inches closer to you.

“Mando, hi,” you smile, pleasantly surprised to see him. “What can I get ya?”

He hesitates, gulping. The heat wave hasn’t retreated from Nevarro, and it does not help with the way his body sweats right now.

“Spotchka. Please,” he clears his throat, insecure.

He’s never had the beverage before, but it’s the one thing that crossed his mind. Because the question that unveils itself at the back of his mind as he approaches the bar is… what is he doing here tonight? Just for the drink? He can’t drink with anyone around. So what the hell is his plan, why is he here with limp legs, barely able to breathe—

“Here we are,” you say, pouring the blue liquid in a glass and putting it in front of him.

“Thank you.”

“So what brings you here tonight?”

Gloved hand curled around the glass, Din falls prey to a deep silence. What can he tell you? He doesn’t know himself.

“Uh—“

“Are you okay?”

“How can you tell if there’s something—“

“Well, for one thing, I know Mandalorians don’t eat or drink in front of others, even if I can turn around and that guy in the back is drunk under the table. And you do seem a bit nervous.”

Kriffing hell, how are you so damn good at reading him? How can you even be so understanding and kind?

Would you be so understanding if he’d told you he can’t stop thinking about you? That he thinks about you even when he shouldn’t?

“Tell you what,” you lean over the counter and get so close to his visor he could pass out. “I have to close up soon anyway. How about I take this”, you smile and take the whole bottle of spotchka, “and we go somewhere more private?”

“Are you—is that okay? Closing early, I mean.”

You sneak a look back to notice the Mythrol still under the table and refrain yourself from giggling. “It’s fine, don’t worry. I might need some help cleaning around here.”

Din carries the Mythrol out the cantina all the way till he passes out somewhere on the street, near the garbage cans. Neither you nor Din care enough to keep tabs on him, and honestly, Din is far too lost in your scent to pick up on anything else around him.

“Where we going?” he asks eventually.

“My place.”

Din stops, gulping and staring at you in awe. He knows what this means, the implications and everything else, and suddenly he’s fearful.

Fearful for not being enough for you and not living up to whatever expectations you may have.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you immediately apologize, noticing his stiff stance. “I didn’t mean—I just thought you’d like it better if you were in a more intimate setting. I mean not intimate, but—not a public space, you know?”

“Yes.”

“You just seem like the type of guy who likes to be mostly by himself, so if that’s okay with you—“

“It’s—fine.”

Suddenly his mind is plagued by the possibilities: are you nervous too because of him? Could that even be possible? No, how could it? He’s a Mandalorian, sworn to the Creed and a lifetime of solitude. He never lost his head like this—or at all, really.

How could you foster any sort of interest in him when you barely know him? When you haven’t even seen him?

But he finds himself following you blindly, his heart’s desire and curiosity exceeding his brain’s rationality. Although he knows that you won’t hurt him in any way—he supposed infatuation does that to someone’s logic—he cannot help the nervousness that seeps through its every pore. The surrounding environment slowly fades with each step he takes in proximity to your place, and suddenly, all Din is capable of focusing on is you.

You’re all he sees, all he’s curious about, and all he wants. Though not versed in the ways of relationships and feelings and such, he does know what he feels. He knows that he aches for you, deeply, and—perhaps delusion is part of the deal because he’s foolish enough to think that maybe you might be interested in him as well.

For why else would you invite him to your private quarters?

“Here we are,” you announce with a sweet smile.

Din suddenly realizes that he is finally in your private quarters. He glances around at the neat space, very much in tone with you. He’s nervous still, but much more content to be in such a space.

“If you feel like having a drink, I can give you some privacy.”

Din feels struck by your politeness; more so by you respecting boundaries he hasn’t even set.

“I know Mandalorians don’t show their faces in front of—strangers,” you smile.

“You do?”

“Yeah. My father was a Mandalorian.”

Underneath the helmet, Din raises his brows, almost shook at the realization.

“He was?”

“Yes. He fought in the war, defending Mandalore. And… he passed away.”

“This is the Way.”

Din nods somberly, hoping you understand. And you do. Of course you do.

But this explains why you’ve been so understanding and respectful. And it explains why you’ve been gravitating around him. Perhaps Din’s presence was a faint reminder of that former Mandalorian in your life.

“Anyway, I uh—I’ll leave you to your drink if—“

“Stay. Please.”

His please sounds throated and shaky, and it blindsides you. You figured he was nervous, maybe because he’s unaccustomed to being alone with someone, and you didn’t want to scare him off.

You pour spotchka for the two of you, polite enough to look away whenever Din lifts his helmet in the slightest to take a sip. The liquid is intense, going down to his stomach like a fire rapidly spreading throughout his whole body.

Once he takes the first few sips—and albeit their small quantity, they still relax him and make him feel more at ease and slightly sweaty—Din asks about your father and your past. You share gladly, openly, as if you are talking to an old friend. And so he finds out about your childhood and about you, soaking up the knowledge like a sponge.

In return, he tells you about him and his past, how he came to be the warrior standing now before you, and to say you are mesmerized is an understatement.

You are beyond touched by his life story, his perseverance and his bravery to carry on and find himself a new purpose even after suffering the loss of his parents. You could relate to that as well; losing your father in the Great Purge when you were very young could’ve easily let you to become a train wreck, but instead you were determined to provide for yourself and your mother. She took it the hardest, and while she always made sure you had everything you needed and was enough mother and father for you, you knew that she missed him terribly all the time.

As the stories come to an end, Din finds himself craving again. Now that he’s getting to know you, his craving only surges, and, like never before, he feels that his armor is constricting him.

“Are you okay?” you ask after a while.

He swallows harshly, his throat dry whereas his mouth was watering with each second he spends looking at you. What an odd phenomenon, he thinks.

“Why?” he foolishly asks.

“You just seem to be very nervous.”

“I—am. You make me nervous.”

You raise your brows, visibly surprised at the confession. Though if you have to admit to yourself, you’re quite nervous too; your heart’s thrumming in your ears, beating so fast inside your chest you can feel it.

“I do?” you ask just as foolishly.

Din nods. “Why? I’m just—me.”

He can’t even begin to tell you just how wonderful you seem to him. Frankly, he doubts he has the words for it anyway.

You think the same about him. There’s an aura of mystery surrounding him, a lot of things you still don’t know about him, and yet you feel as if you’ve known him for months, if not years. And, though it may seem crazy, the more you stare at him, the more you can imagine the face of the man behind the armor. You can imagine his eyes, kind and warm, plush lips, perhaps some facial hair making him distinguishable.

And suddenly heat spreads throughout your whole body, settling dangerously low in your belly and between your legs.

You want to ask what happens now; you drank, you shared stories, and now all you’re left with is a yearning that doesn’t seem to subside. Din doesn’t know how to continue the conversation, either. He’s too struck by you, too smitten to verbalize his feelings, which are those of desire, he’s concluded.

But how to say this aloud? “I want you”? That just sounds crass. Instead, he coos your name, gulping afterwards, and you hold your breath, waiting.

“What is it?” you ask.

“You make me nervous.”

“So you’ve said.”

“You make me nervous because… I want you.”

Oh, dank farrik. He should not have said that. He should not have said it like that—or at all, really.

“I meant—I want… to be with you. No, I—“

Then he hears you giggle, and his heart flutters in his chest. Laughter is a good sign, right? That he didn’t yet make a complete fool of himself? He can only hope.

“That’s okay,” you smile at him. “I have to admit, I… I want to be with you too.”

If he was unsure whether he was sweating before, Din is now convinced he’s sweating buckets underneath the armor and the tunic.

“You—you do?” he asks, completely dumbfounded.

“Yes. Is that bad?”

Maybe it should be, he thinks. Maybe it should because he’s a Mandalorian and he has taken the Creed and he is loyal to his family and his beliefs, but… why does it feel so good to stand here before you, so vulnerable?

“No,” he replies.

You stand up, extending your hand to him, and Din gulps again as his gloved hand takes yours into his. He struggles to regulate his breaths while you guide him to what he can assume is your bedroom, but fails to do so. Anticipation is nearly asphyxiating him, and he’s so hard by this point it’s a miracle you didn’t somehow notice it.

Or you did and were too polite to mention it.

Either way, once he’s in your bedroom, Din stills, and so do you.

“Have you done this before?” you ask, and boy is he grateful for your consideration. Since you’ve had a Mandalorian father, he can only assume you know some things about the culture that make you more attentive to details. “Have you ever been with someone?”

“I have not.”

“We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to.”

All the blood flow is basically in his pants so he can’t think of a decent thing to say.

“I do want to,” he replies.

“Okay, then we take things slow, and… if there’s anything you feel uncomfortable with, we stop. Does that sound good?”

“Yes.”

You turn off the main light, allowing only some lights from the street to shine in, thus granting the minimum visualization, for which Din is beyond thankful.

“Is it okay if I—take this off?”

He assumes you mean the armor, and he agrees with a shaky yes. You move closer to him, removing his armor bit by bit, all while his heart’s about to burst out of his chest and his pants on the verge of explosion. You don’t reach for the helmet; you leave that up to him. Once the armor is removed, Din is standing in his tunic, and he takes it upon himself to remove the clothing, mostly because he’d be embarrassed if you were to discover how hard he is right now.

Though he supposes you will find out soon enough.

Since it’s dark enough to not actually see anything but forms, Din feels comfortable enough to remove the helmet. You hear the faint click and you gasp.

“You took off the helmet?” you ask.

“Yes.”

Gods, his voice sounds so rich and smooth even without the modulator.

“I thought you’re not supposed to.”

He doesn’t reply; yes, he’s not supposed to, but technically, you can’t see him, so there is no danger. Then it hits him that you’re probably naked by now, too, and his nervousness returns.

“Alright then,” you say, though your voice is shaky with emotion too. “Is it okay if I kiss you? To… you know, get us started?”

“Yes.”

He couldn’t have answered that fast enough. You can easily deduce that this is his first time kissing someone too, so you make a mental note to be extra tender.

“Can I touch your face?”

“Y-Yes.”

He feels your warm breath on his lips and he shudders. Then you cup his cheeks, grazing them gently and pulling him in. You can tell he’s new at this, as well as rigid, so you kiss him sweetly, slowly, patient and eager for his reaction.

Reaction which does not fail to arise.

Din grows needier within seconds; he’s roaming his hands over the small of your back, then to your shoulders and hair, opening his mouth in order to explore more of yours. You gladly reciprocate, but do so just as tenderly, as if showing him the way around your mouth. The thing you didn’t realize about Din, he’s a fast learner. He rapidly learns how you like to be kissed, thus learning how he likes it, too, and he lets himself go. He lets himself get lost in the moment, in your sweet scent and taste, and by Gods, it is heavenly.

When you break the kiss, he’s almost sad. But then you say something that makes his heart jump right into his throat.

“Lay on the bed, and let me take care of you.”

The saccharine request has him weak—and questioning things he doesn’t dare question aloud. Take care of him how?

Soon he finds out; the moment you see his rather broad shape lounging on the bed, you move atop of him, kissing a hot trail from his cheeks to his jaw, neck, chest, belly…

Then Din gasps.

You reach his neediest part and he twitches just as you wrap your arm around his cock, the strokes slow and steady.

“Is this okay?” you check with him. “Does it feel good?”

“Mhm—yes—“

Unbeknownst to him, you smile, continuing to stroke him. You listen in to his grunts, and you can only think of the sounds he’d make once you’d take him in your mouth. Or the sounds he’d make being inside you.

Dank fucking farrik, you’re growing wetter as your imagination is running wilder. With your hand at the base of his cock, you take the rest of him in your mouth.

“F-Fuck—“Din moans brokenly, his breaths shallow and rapid. “Fuck, you’re s-so—so good—“

You hum in appreciation, and the vibration sends tingles down his spine. He’s not sure he’s going to keep going like this. His whole body burns and aches and he doesn’t want to come like this, not when you have him in your mouth. It feels… inappropriate. Like you deserve better than something purely filthy.

“Wait, stop,” he wails.

Instantly your eyes go to where his face would be, taking him out of your mouth and ceasing your strokes. Though still hard, Din no longer feels the need to come—at least the need isn’t that urgent.

“Did I hurt you somehow?” you ask. “I’m so sorry!”

“No, it’s—I didn’t want to come yet.”

“Why not?”

Maybe it’s more than just lust. How can he explain how enamored he is with your whole image, how drunk he is on your presence, and that he thinks you deserve only the kindest and best things in this life and him coming down your throat feels cheap?

“I want to feel you,” he mutters. “Can I?”

Breathless, you whisper a desperate yes and make your way to his face, kissing him again. His lips are soft and plush, like you’ve imagined, but if you move too much you fear he’d hear how shamefully wet you are.

The kiss, though innocent in the beginning, turns rather sloppy, betraying both your eagerness. Din moves so that he’s on top of you, one of his hands boldly parting your thighs to make room for him. He brushes against your folds, almost grunting upon feeling the slick heat. The mere idea that you want him this much and that your body is so responsive to his hesitant, clumsy touches is mind-boggling to him.

“Can I go inside you?” he asks.

You feels his shallow breaths on your face and you can’t believe how overstimulated you are just from light touching and undressing.

But you know that for a Mandalorian, the undressing part at least was erotic in and of itself. What follows is merely an enhancement of that longing, one that Din feels more than lucky to get to share it with someone like you.

“Yes,” you respond.

Din grunts as he wraps his hand around his cock, painful to the touch. He fails to see you sneak a hand in between your legs and rub your clit while you wait. The anticipation is overwhelming you too, and it’s so surprising to want someone you barely know so damn much.

But here you are, wet as you could possibly be, legs spread for him, waiting.

“Remember, if you want to stop—“

“I don’t want to stop.”

Almost out of breath, everything around Din fades once he pushes the head of his cock past your lips. You gasp and moan as he keeps pushing in, making you feel every inch of him. The sting is a bit painful, on account of his size and girth, but you welcome it gladly. Once he’s fully sheathed inside you, Din exhales. You’re warm and tight around him, and it’s making him dizzy.

“Are you okay?” you ask.

Gods, how can you be so considerate even when you’re just as deprived of proper touch as he is?

“You just feel… so tight and warm,” he replies. His voice sounds like it doesn’t even belong to him. “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for. Everyone’s nervous and clumsy during their first time. I’m thankful you wanted to share this with me.”

“I can’t imagine this with anyone else.”

It’s then that you find the strength to cup his cheeks and kiss him again, which prompts Din in return to move at last. You groan into his mouth when you feel his languid thrusts inside, both of you starved. Little by little, Din builds a pace, one that works for both you and him. He’s in awe at the sounds you make, the way your body feels around him and even enamored by the squelching sounds emerging in between your legs where your bodies are joined together. Everything about you is inebriating.

In this moment, when everything feels so much more heightened, he knows he’d do anything for you. Anything you want, he’ll give you.

Despite his prior nervousness and lack of experience, just like with the kiss, Din learns fast. He quickly learns which angle feels good for you and which motion drives the sultriest moan from your side, and sticks to that. His thrusts are tender, much like him, and frankly, it surprises you to notice the imbalance between the fierce Mandalorian you’ve seen in the cantina and the man behind the armor, naked above and stealing moans and sloppy kisses from you. He stretches you wide with each thrust, growing a bit too eager and thus speeding up—which you do not mind one bit. It’s the ideal combination of tender and rough, getting you just where you need to be.

He kisses you as he buries himself inside you to the hilt, making you feel every inch of him. His head falls in the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent, closely listening to the sounds you make for and because of him. One hand sneaks at the back of his head, caressing his hair as sweat begins to prickle your skin—and his too, it seems.

“You’re so good,” you whisper to him. “You’re doing—so good.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm—so good for me—that’s it.”

You wish you’d know his name so you can call it out when you come, but you don’t think to ask of that right now. Not when you’re so full of him you could scream throughout the galaxy.

So instead, you keep muttering sweet nothings to him, encouragements to get him going and build his pleasure further. You simply have the feeling that this is a man who needs the praise, someone who thrives on validation though he may not admit to it. so you keep doing that, for both your pleasure, and then you start to feel it: the familiar burn in your lower belly that’s threatening to explode.

And Din feels it, too.

“I’m gonna come,” he warns, sucking in a sharp breath. “Shit, I’m—where?”

“What?”

“Tell me—where to come.”

You peck his lips. “Anywhere you want.”

You don’t have the patience or the time to tell him that you’re safe and clean, and it doesn’t really matter right now. This moment is far too precious and important to not enjoy it to its fullest.

Din pulls out, stroking himself to completion over your folds and lower belly in thick, hot spurts. You follow suit and you rub your clit fast, reaching your own orgasm. You close your eyes, relishing into the blissful sensation. You can still hear Din catching his breath, so again you pull him down to your face to kiss him. Oddly enough, that seems to steady him.

“Was that good?” he asks shyly afterwards, and Gods, you’re just so enamored with him you could cry.

Instead, you chuckle lightly as he falls to your side. “It was wonderful.”

You feel him shifting towards you, his breath over your face. “If you’ll have me… I’m yours.”

Though he can’t see you, you smile so wide you fear you might overstretch your whole face.

“There’s no ‘if’,” you whisper him reassuringly. “I do want you. But I do hope you know this means I’m yours, too.”

Din smiles, nodding in the darkness. He smiles for the first time in a long time. There’s a calm happiness about him, yet a violent one at the same time. A tumultuous happiness which his heart cannot possibly resist. He’s in this euphoric state, having discovered the pleasures of the flesh, as well as those of the heart; he grazes your arm as you retreat at his chest, and in this moment, there is no fear.

tags: @groguspawbeans

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inuiiwonderland · 1 year ago

Text

You were assigned on a mission to go check out on a local village that has been getting terrorized by demons for the past few weeks. You and Mitsuri wedding was only 2 months away and you wanted to complete one last mission before retiring as a hashira. But while on the mission...something went horribly wrong.

A/n: some demon slayer angst cuz why not🤷🏻‍♀️

You walked down the rocky path as you walked to the village. The sun was starting to set and you knew that the demons would be out by the time you got there.

The village wasn't that far, it was only 1-2 hours away from your estate and you enjoyed the nice long walk.

You've been a demon slayer for more than 5 years now. Being in the corps since you were 14. You never would've imagined a great future for yourself when you were young. You always thought you would serve in the corps til the day you die.

But look at you now

You are engaged. You are about to marry the love of your life in less than 2 months and you will retire as a hashira after serving for nearly 5 years.

You wanted to complete one last mission before your retirement. So when Kagaya said that there was a local village not so far by your estate that has been getting terrorized by demons for the past 2 weeks, you didn't hesitate to say that you would check it out.

Which brings you here.

You noticed that it was pretty quiet. Too quiet for a village that has been getting disturbed by demons almost everyday.

You walked around as you saw only a few people walking around heading home. Giving them a small smile and a nod, they felt relieved to see a member of the demon slayer corps-especially a hashira, walking around their village.

You continued to walk until you heard a blood curdling scream. With quick speed, you ran to where you heard the scream and stopped dead in your tracks to see a woman shaking in fear as a man grips her by her hair.

You didn't know why but something about this man made you uneasy.

"P-please…let me go!" You could hear the fear in the woman's voice as she pleaded for him to let her go.

The man seems to ignore her pleas and his hold on her hair seems to get even stronger.

That was enough for you to step in.

"Hey!"

The sudden yell was enough to catch the man's attention. Soon red eyes met yours and you felt a sudden change in the air.

"Let her go"

The man only stared. You both stared each other down as the women only shook in fear.

He then let go of the woman's hair and she quickly stood up before running away but not before thanking you. You only nod before looking back at the man.

He was quiet. Only just staring you down which you found a little weird. You watched closely, getting ready incase he attacks. But as you stared at him more, you come to the sudden realization of who this man truly is.

"Muzan" you whispered. A small smirk creeps up on his face as you say his name. You draw out your sword and get into position.

Never in a million years did you think you would ever encounter the demon king. Especially on your last mission before retirement.

"A demon slayer. How interesting"

"Never would've thought I would encounter the demon king himself. How interesting" He scowled.

Muzan wasn't expecting to fight anyone tonight. But since you are here, he wouldn't mind killing someone tonight.

You knew that you would probably not make it out alive if you fought him. This is muzan himself. The king of all demons. You would probably need 10 or even more hashira to fight him.

You took a deep breath in, you focused your eyes on him and watched him closely. Muzan stared closely at you. He knew that you knew that you would probably not make out of this fight alive, but as a slayer, you would fight to the death to stop him from creating more demons.

You close your eyes and the image of your lovely wife, mitsuri, flashes through your head.

"I love you my love"

And you attack

Mitsuri smiles as she looks down at the lovely ring that adores her finger.

"Isn't it beautiful kyo?" She says as she shows her dear friend the ring.

"It is a really lovely ring! Y/n has a fine taste in jewelry I see!"

Mitsuri giggles as she then blushes at the thought of you. In 2 months, she would be married to you and in 2 months you two would soon start a new chapter in both of your guys lives.

Mitsuri was also planning on retiring as a hashira with you. She has been in the corps for 3 years now and she didn't want to worry you if she continued to be a hashira.

"Oh I can't wait for our wedding! I just know it's going to be beautiful and amazing!"

Kyojuro just smiles as he continues to hear mitsuri talk about the wedding. He is very happy to see that mitsuri has someone good in her life.

"And the food will definitely be tasty!"

"Y/n parents are excellent cooks! I can't wait to try the food!" They both continued to happily talk without knowing what tomorrow's event would bring.

It was morning.

The slightly cold wind made mitsuri shiver a bit as she excitedly waited for your arrival.

Today you were going to come back after your mission. Mitsuri couldn't wait to see you again!

Yeah you were gone for only a day but mitsuri still missed you.

She waited patiently by the entrance to her mansion for your arrival. She didn't know why, but she suddenly got a strange gut feeling. But she shook it off, thinking that it was probably nothing.

As she waited, she saw someone walking from a distance. She grew excited thinking it was you but as the person got closer she saw that it was no other than shinobu.

“Oh shinobu! What brings you here?”

“I just wanted to stop by and see if you are ok”

“Huh? If I’m ok? But I’m fine! You see y/n is supposed to come today so I’m here waiting for her!” Mitsuri didn’t notice the slightly surprised and sad look on Shinobu's face as she excitedly told her about what she had planned out for your arrival.

“Oh Mitsuri-“

“It’s y/n crow!” She happily points out. But soon, the happy and bubbly smile wiped out her face when she noticed that your crow came alone.

“CAW CAW Y/N L/N IS DEAD! Y/N HAS DIED AFTER ENCOUNTERING MUZAN!!”

Mitsuri's heart dropped once she heard what your crow had said. She could feel tears starting to fall as she began sobbing right then and there.

“N-no! This can’t be! Y/n can’t be dead! no no no!”

Shinobu tried to comfort Mitsuri as she continued to sob her heart out. The poor girl was indeed heartbroken after receiving such terrible news, especially news about her fiancée, her love, her future wife.

“I-I should’ve gone with her! I should’ve gone with her and this could all have been avoided!” She says as she continues to cry out even more. Shinobu just gently caresses her back as she lets her continue.

“Why…why out of all demons did she have to encounter muzan..”

Shinobu doesn’t say anything and just sits there in silence. But then she breaks the silence once Mitsuri has quieted down a bit.

“Mitsuri”

“Mm?” She hums as tears still continue to slide down her cheeks.

“Y/n told me…that if anything like this were to happened, then she wants you to keep this” mitsuri looks to see shinobu pull out your sword.

“T-this is-“

“Y/n sword” shinobu smiles as she hands mitsuri your sword.

“She wants you to keep it”

Mitsuri gently holds your sword as she hugs it close to her chest. This was the only thing she had left of you.

“I’ll defeat muzan! I’ll make him pay for what he has done to my love!”

Shinobu just stays quiet as Mitsuri tightly holds your sword closer to her.

She will defeat muzan. Even if it takes her life.

She will get revenge for her beloved.

—

Sorry if it’s ooc😓 but anyways here is some lovely mitsuri angst🫶🏻😘

#inuiiwonderland🤍#demon slayer #demon slayer x female reader #demon slayer x reader #demon slayer angst #demon slayer mitsuri #mitsuri x female reader #mitsuri kanroji #mitsuri x reader #kny mitsuri #demon slayer muzan

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stvnszlr · 10 months ago

Note

HI! Here to beg u for Steven adhd headcanons

Pls i promise i'll be good this year.

oh my goodness … so um this is something i am like way too passionate about !! im going to seem like the craziest crazy person EVER by sharing this cuz i wrote .… a lot but u guys gotta stick with me okay you’ll see the vision

THANK YOU for asking this btw ! this is one of the things that makes me relate to steven the most ,,>_<,, and i will literally talk abt it anytime

☆ steven adhd hc’s / reasons why i think it’s possible he has adhd ! ☆ ( coming from someone who has a severe combined type adhd diagnosis )

please note this is all just speculation !! i’ve noticed some connections between his behavior / things he’s spoken about and adhd symptoms , but i am certainly no doctor and the only one who can truly determine any of this is steven himself . these observations are mostly just for my comfort as a neurodivergent person :)

ohhh stevie is a BIG stimmer :) he taps on everything in sight , he also hums a lot and likes to move his body ! bouncing , jumping , flapping , shaking , jiggling , playing with his hair ( i have video evidence sue me >:( )

people often describe him as “twitchy” , randomly making odd movements or sounds that can surprise and confuse those around him

vocal stims , dude . like my man is a parrot he’ll repeat random phrases over and over without thinking about it , just going about his day mumbling the most obscure sentences without even realizing

i’ve also noticed from watching videos he has a big BIG tendency to repeat things other people say !! i think that’s a combo of vocal stimming and also struggling to fit in when making conversation

he has literally confessed to having sensory issues related to taste and texture ??!?!? so i imagine he has them with other things too it’s mostly touch or sound related things that really get to him and can cause overwhelm but honestly anything that catches him at the right time will have him retreating inside himself and blocking everything out , unable to respond cuz he can’t think or listen

also seems to struggle with clothes touching his body ! he is always in loose tank tops and wears a lot of cropped pants / shorts , and has never really worn a lot of accessories unlike his bandmates . this could definitely be attributed to sensory issues , especially hating the feeling of wearing jewelry ( rings especially ) and also makeup on his face

drums !!! poppy loves drumming , it is SUCH a good stimulant for his brain cuz it works muscle memory , gives a dopamine rush , and combines both creative thought with an athletic activity

hyperfixations oh my god he is so bad . so so bad . he’ll pick up something for like a few weeks and dedicate EVERYTHING to it just to never pick it up again

very typical hyperactive type adhd , trouble focusing and sitting still OH MY GOD this man cannot sit normally for the life of him

um hyperfocus also !! drums is prolly his biggest one but if it’s something he’s super tuned into he can just . sit there and mindlessly work on it for HOURS before someone notices and is like hello take a break ??

didn’t like school cuz he always felt like he wasn’t smart , he was actually really interested by some subjects but just couldn’t keep up as a student :/ he also started getting into skating and music which were much better dopamine activities than school so he kinda just . quit ?

part of why his mom kicked him out so young , he was impulsive and reckless and very VERY high energy , easily irritated and his emotions had no filter / couldn’t control them or his actions based on them

this poor kid is so forgetful . he really cannot remember shit and it gets him in trouble a lot ! he’s gotta be reminded by the guys about EVERYTHING and it annoys them to no end , and steven always feels bad cause he wishes he could remember , but for some reason he forgets every time !

it’s where his irritability comes from too , he sometimes flips like a switch and can get really defensive and aggressive . he’ll lash out and turn really angry — not in a super serious way , but it’s the reason he gets in so many little fights with all the other guys , especially axl .

this is also tied in with the rlly strong sense of justice that neurodivergent people feel !! the reason he’d stand up and talk back when everyone else could just let it go

easier to fall into addiction and harder to get out of it . places a vice on his brain , trapping him in dependency on the drugs and making it so much more difficult to quit — why it took him so much longer to get sober than any of the others , even after all his health scares

drugs are also a coping mechanism for sensory issues and that awful , isolating feeling of being built just slightly different than everyone else

UM ???? LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT STEVEN POST GNR + LEAVING THE BAND IS JUST SCREAMING RSD ??? like the abandonment issues built up from his childhood ON TOP of being insanely sensitive to disappointing others / feeling unwanted ?? yeah i fucking understand why he couldn’t let go of it for almost twenty years of his life that’s like the worst possible thing to go through as someone hypersensitive to feelings of rejection bro . oh my god .

rsd also attributes to him being really eager to please especially with friends , and trying to talk himself up and seem cool and on their level and worth keeping around :(

i do also think it is likely that he learned to mask a LOT of his symptoms , of course not all of them ( as we can pretty obviously see in like . any video ever taken of him ) but a lot of the less socially acceptable ones he naturally forced himself to hide :(

#thanks for listening to my yapping #i am begging this man to take the brown scales test he would be off the charts #steven adler #saz speaks #saz requests !#guns n roses #gnr #steven gnr #steven adler adhd #guns n roses headcannons #steven adler imagine #adhd #neurodivergent

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kimhargreeves · 2 years ago

Text

Until The Very End -Shion x Reader (Hell's Paradise)

Summary: Prepared to head to a dangerous place with criminals, you find yourself not only fighting them but another powerful being living in the forest. Your Master being not that far away from you, always willing to protect you no matter what.

(So I finally decided to give Hell's Paradise a chance since I saw an image of Shion and Tenza and decided to continue watching the anime. Stayed up until 4am and in all honesty I would've loved episodes 8 trio to be the main characters. I find them more interesting than the actual ones. So, here I decided to write a one shot of Shion, just things are a bit out of order at the end but it's how I decided to write it. Prepare the tissues!)

I stared down at my sword, blood slowly dripping onto the light green colored grass. The person laying on a puddle of blood wasn't one of my team, but a criminal, he was once wanted for killing women in specifically in front of young children, delivering their heads to the male of the house and enjoyed watching them suffer for their loves ones.

It was clear as day that I wasn't fond of who I was teamed up with. He sensed this too, so he tried to kill me when he believed I was distracted once we had traveled across the angry waves of the ocean separating us from our next destination.

The man thought he could kill me, but he was too weak, he was scared when he saw me swinging my sword. Scared because for the first time no one was capable of killing him, he used to suffer watching innocent people die, and he found one innocent who thought would do the same.

"Gross, my sword is dirty again." I cleaned the blade with my sleeves and quickly hid my sword back.

I smelled the air and could smell iron, the smell of blood nearby. I continued to walk further until I saw the body of one of my comrades. I knelt down on the ground and said a small prayer.

Though I wouldn't get along with a few, most of them were good men. I frown looking at the ground and felt a pang on my chest, Eizen. He was the second person who found me back in the day when I needed help, the first one being Shion.

I still remember the day when I met them both. My life wasn't easy from an early age, I worked harder than most men, slept very little and ate when I could find any leftovers.

Life is truly a living hell, full of anger, sadness and lots of death, but at the same time it's beautiful…

"Hope you find peace in the afterlife." I muttered and got back up on my feet.

Quickly I left the spot hoping to not come across another demon and find any of my teammates back again.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

From an early age I felt like I was born to suffer, to not have a full filing and happy life. I don't remember much of my childhood despite going through a lot, but what I do remember is at the age of 12 I was sold by my family.

They are a family with plenty of children, but onto had boys, six boys and a girl when I was born. "A woman has to provide for their family, bear children and do what society tells them to do." That's all I ever heard from my parents.

Despite being still very young, I decided to take another path. I started following in my father's footsteps and my brother's, trying to fit in and train like them, I used to stare in awe when I saw them fighting to become soldiers.

I felt like I could be like them, brave, being recognized for their strength and traveling to get the job done.

The day I turned 12, the exact same day I was sold to a house. My parents said they had no use of me if I wouldn't be of help to them, so they did what was easiest to them.

If they didn't have money, then why did they have so many children?

I was terrified that day, held back my tears as I was dragged to what would be my home, no my work place. I was sold to become a prostitute, entertain men at a young age.

The house was full of beautiful but broken women, wanting to escape their reality just like me.

The people in charge of the pleasure house were anything but kind, but at least they knew I wasn't ready. They said I was still to young to be of service, so I stayed in that home for two more years.

When I reached 14 I was told that my age was appropriate, I was ready to become a woman. Many men had entered the place, some flirting with the woman and others simply enjoying their meals or drinks.

"This one is your newest girl." The madam of the house introduced me with a fake name for my protection.

"Isn't she a bit too young?" I heard a man ask

"A-Ah yes! But it's a woman's job to serve.", The madam replied. "Tonight will be a special night for her."

I panicked hearing those words, when that happened I accidentally spilled tea onto her lap and earned a strong hit from her.

"Stupid girl! You're no help to us at all!" She let her anger towards me known.

I excused myself and quickly left the room as I held my cheeks and felt my eyes stinging. I wanted to run away, leave this place for once, I didn't care if I were to die the next day, I'd rather be dead than live a life others want to control.

"Are you alright?"

I glanced back and took a good look at the man who spoke back inside. He was a bit taller than me, with scars over his eyes and across. Is he blind?

"I see you're upset. It's okay to be."

I guess he was trying to joke at the first sentence, but I could feel calmness coming from him. A pure air coming from him.

"You're planning on running away aren't you? I think you should, I can see that they treat you badly. A child as yourself shouldn't be in these conditions."

I made no effort to talk, afraid that I might get hurt for talking to a man who si clearly higher in status than me.

"Here take this, it's the least I can do to help." The man had in his hands a kunai. "I hope for us to reunite in the future." The man waved and smiled down at me.

My eyes widened and I simply stated at him amazed, hopeful, he was the first person to help me. That person was Shion.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

That same night I ran, stole enough money for a few days, had my new weapon in hand and left to never return to that miserable life. That night was finally the night I could finally cry after years of holding my emotions in.

I went into hiding and cut my hair off to dress as a boy. It was the only way to get a proper job and to be treated differently.

So, I trained myself simply by watching other men doing their job. I got myself baggy enough clothes that would hide my figure and I worked selling carbon for a while until I was adopted into a family of an elderly couple.

"This young man is simply impressive. He'll grow up to be a fine soldier." My adoptive parents said.

It wasn't long after I told them my secret, both were concerned over me but they accepted me when I swore to protect them and continue to provide for them. They loved me nonetheless, both their kids were killed a long time ago, so they treated me as their own.

My adoptive father had worked in the Yamada clan in his younger days, seeing my potential he was the one who helped me grow stronger and eventually when I was 16, I was accepted into joining a clan.

I continued to hold onto my kunai, hoping to see the man who gifted it to me. I held the item dear to me, I blushed whenever I would remember him. Though he was just a few years older, I hope to see him again.

So, I went to one of the strongest in their field. I continued to dress as a boy and fooled everyone. I continued to train and eventually met who would be my master.

I was now a part of the Yamada clan, accepted to finally become a samurai.

I remained still in a line waiting with the rest of the newest members and I gasped when my eyes fell on the figure of a talk man with silver hair and scars. My heart began to beta faster than usual, after years I finally saw him again. He grew up to be a lot more handsome.

I was just a child when I met him, there's no way he'll recognize my voice of who I am. Men, soldiers like him are focused on their jobs, nothing more.

"(Y/N), step forward." I did as told and stopped closer to him and was now face to face. "From now on Shion will be your Master. You will obey his orders and train your hardest, let's hope and see what they say about you is true."

I nodded my head and bowed. "I look forward to become your partner and train to be as strong as you!"

The man remained silent and when I looked up I could see a faint smile on his lips when he rose up from bowing his head as well.

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Weeks went by and training was indeed hell, but I've endured harder treatments. This is nothing to me, I swore I would grow stronger to prove my parents my worth and to impress, Shion. To show him that I grew to become a strong person because of him.

The blush across my face would be apparent everytime Shion would pass by me. The rest of my team would be confused as to why I would become all flustered. Eizen a man with long dark red hair, I remember him as the one who gave me a bit of money when I was working at the pleasure house.

He was the first one to accept me here and he helped me in choosing the proper tools so my sword would be made.

My back was hurting along with my legs from the amounts of hits I would receive from still training. So, I decided to soak in the river by night time when everyone was asleep.

I winced at the pain when I undressed myself and soaked into the water. I scrubbed myself and cleaned my hair, I realized it was growing a bit longer than I would've liked since I would get caught being a girl.

"What are you doing here so late?"

I screamed and quickly rose up from the water and turned to face Shion. I covered myself quickly.

"I can't see anything, remember?" I saw Shion smiling when he crossed his arms over his chest.

Quickly I reached for my robes and placed them on me. "What are you doing here?" I said making my voice lower, still a blushing mess.

Though he didn't see me, I felt like he did.

I noticed Shion still smiling, "Don't worry your secret is safe with me, (Y/N)."

I gasped and felt my lips tremble and tears beginning to run down my face. "Y-You remember?" I held my chest tight.

Shion nodded his head, "Of course. How could I forget? You were in need when we met years ago. You were just a child, suffering and alone. I imagine you out that kunai to good use?"

His voice lowered and I nodded my head. "I still keep it with me, I….thank you.." I was at loss for words.

After so many years he still remembers me.

"I won't tell your secret, but I don't understand why you would do it. You should let your true self known, if not you'll continue hiding who you really are. Prove to everyone that even if you're a girl, you are capable of standing even more."

I raised my hand up to touch my hair, Shion is right.

"I won't treat you any different. From now on I am your Master and you are my student. Our bond will only grow stronger, no matter what happens we have to be there for one another."

Tears continued to fall down my face. I sniffed began to wipe my face in a hurry. "L-Let's head back inside before they notice we are gone."

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

The village was suddenly attacked one day, most people passed away and so did my adoptive parents. I was left with no one but Shion now, he took me in as now onto his student but to live with him.

I was 20 now and still working and going on missions. Shion and I continued to train but everytime he would win or we would match, I wanted to finally win him but failed everytime.

Over time I grew confident of myself and was accepted when I revealed I was really a girl, some accepted and some did not. But, thankfully I wasn't the only girl.

It didn't take long for me to finally have a student of my own, but I would always consider Shion as my master. My student was resting after suffering a broken ankle but he said he would quickly recover.

Not only did I have a student, but Shion had taken another one in. He had once around the same time he started training me, but info he had to end his once students life when he chose the wrong path in life.

Now a young man known as Tenza was his student. He remained sitting next to my student and began cheering for me to defeat Shion

Both of us quickly dodging ones attacks or almost being able to hit each other.

"When are you finally going to defeat me, (Y/N)?" Shion asked almost bored at the amount of times I've told him to fight me.

I huffed and continued to lunge forward with my attacks when Shion easily blocked his sword from my attacks.

I grin and didn't fall back, "Ha! I'll defeat you one day and when that day comes, You're definitely gonna become my husband and marry me. You'll see!" I exclaim.

Earning odd looks from my student and Tenza. "There she goes again with the flirting. Just marry already!" Tenza shouted.

"I don't think Master Shion might feel the same.." my student making me gasp.

Over time I became confident in myself, and my needles flirting. Shion must've taken this as a joke but I was blurting my true feelings for him known when it was mostly just the both of us alone

In a sense I guess it was a way to repay him for everything he's done for me. Everything I said was the truth, I only wanted to die back then by Shion gave me a different view in life. It may de forbidden between us, but I want to marry him if possible in the future.

"Master..quit embarrassing yourself." I heard my student mutter and hide his face.

"I think it's fun seeing them together." Tenza continued to say.

Shion tilted his head and sighed loudly. "Let's see you try then."

I swung my sword back to my sword and blushed when looking back at him. I'll surely defeat him someday..we ended the fight in a watch and went back to meet with our students who continued to tease me.

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Tenza was with the criminal known as Nurugai, surely they mustn't have gone so far. I sniffed the air and could smell two nearby. I began to run faster through trees and spotted two familiar figures.

"Tenza!" I exclaim and I saw him turn back and smile at me.

"(Y/N)!"

We raced towards each other and the first thing Tenza did was hug me and blush. The girl besides him pouted, "You hug her and not me?"

The criminal pouted I stopped hugging Tenza and turned to the criminal. They seem tiny to be a guy..and doesn't seem like a threat at all. Seems very nice.

"Ah, don't worry! Tenza is a friend of mine. You'll have him don't worry." I smile and see Tenza blushing.

"Don't say those embarrassing things." He sighs and stepped back.

I look at them both and saw they weren't harmed. "Everything alright?"

"Yeah, still looking for what we came here. It feels like we've been here forever."

The three of us began walking together hoping to find any clues and trying to not come across demons.

We remained together in the meantime that was until we finally came across, "Shion!" I exclaim finally seeing his tall figure appear.

I ran forward and felt the need to hug him, but it would unprofessional. The last time I hugged him, I hugged him so hard he almost passed out. He did always say I almost an immense strength.

"Shion! It's so great to see you again." I said blushing.

"I knew nothing would happen to you, Master." Tenza said as we all surrounded Shion.

Shion nodded at us both, "Seems like you've been on your own, (Y/N). What happened to your prisoner?"

"He decided to attacks me, so I swiftly killed him before he had the chance to harm me." I inform him and showed no sign that I was scared.

"You've grown to become an exceptional woman, (Y/N)."

Shion praised me! I smiled wide and felt my entire face turn red. "I-I just did as you told me to, nothing more!"

I closed my mouth and we all turned around and remained silent when we felt the air getting heavy, something isn't right. "What's going on?" We remained silent and suddenly a woman appeared before us with bright orange and yellow hair.

One of the denizens.

The woman quickly turned into a man and started to attack Tenza. Tenza began to slice the demons arms, head and eyes out. The four of us beginning to run away when we began to leave the demon behind.

Tenza, Nurugai and I were quickly running ahead since Shion had thrown his sword at the demon and it pierced it leaving it on the floor with the sword onto the tree.

"We're pretty far away." Shion said when we all reunited.

Both Tenza and Nurugai were out of breath. Once Tenza regained his breathing he eagerly turned to the young boy, "Nurugai, now that this guy's here, we'll be okay."

Ouch. I stared silently glaring at him, "Geez thanks, Tenza."

Tenza shivered and began to chuckle awkwardly. "Don't take it as an offense! It's just.. he's more experienced than you."

"A-Anyways, Nurugai! I owe Shion my life, and he taught me how to use a sword.

Tenza received a light smack on the head by Shion's sword. "You were relying too much on your speed, and your movements were sloppy." Shion began to scold Tense for his actions.

"I could hear how lukewarm your lungs were, too. Each strike should be executed carefully." Shion continued to scold and hit his student.

"Nonetheless, I'm glad you're both alive. Last time I saw you both was on the ship."

Tenza rubbed the back of his head still looking at Shion. "Wait a minute, Master. What have you been doing by yourself?"

"After finishing my duties, I tried finding a way back home, but found no current. There's only so much a blind man can do."

Shion said and I watched him begin to take his sword out until he aimed it boy next to Tenzen. "It's your turn to explain. Why are you protecting a criminal? You were told to execute criminals immediately. That's what I did. She tried to seduce me. So I executed her."

I flushed furious and grabbed Shion's arm and began to try and move him back and forth but he wouldn't let go of the sword.

"How dare you let a woman sit on you like that! Was she beautiful?!" I was now rocking him back and forth with Tenza trying to get me to stop but was now protected Nurugai.

Shion didn't seem to mind me continue to try and push him away since he didn't even move. "Care to give me an explanation, Tenza? Depending on your answer I'll execute the order."

Tenza was deep in thought until he began to say and remember when Shion took him in, how he said Tense had the probability to make this a better world and how kid Shion actually is and wouldn't do it.

To that Shion smiled and pulled his sword back. "Yay! We knew you were a good man!" Tenza and I exclaimed with Nurugai looking at us weirdly.

"I knew you had it in you, Master! You were the one to save us from our previous lives after all!" I praise reaching out and grabbing his arm and holding onto him tight.

Shion didn't seem to mind the action so he said nothing.

"If protecting her would threaten the Yamada clan or you…"

Our mouths fell open when Shion said "Her." I glanced back at what I thought was a boy and back at Shion.

"What's wrong?"

"Her? I'm impressed you figured it out." Tenza said, making me smack his back.

"You knew she was a girl and didn't tell me?!"

"I-I thought it was kinda obvious!"

I look back at the now girl and was surprised by my stupidity..how can I be so blind and not realize it?

"Of course I did. I've got a good eye for evaluating people." Shion said smiling to himself. "I'm honestly surprised (Y/N) didn't know about it sooner, considering she was crossdressing back then."

Tenza tilted his head and sigh, "You sure go love making jokes like that, being able to see."

Nurugai in her spot was now embarrassed between both men. "Nice to meet you, Master." She said looking up at Shion.

Shion lowers down to her level. "Nice to meet you, Nurugai. But you needn't call me 'Master' I haven't taught you anything."

"You can call him Master if you'd like!" I exclaim at Nurugai as I wrapped my arms around Shion's arm again. "Shion here will become my future husband!" I said making the young woman smile.

Shion sighed but smiled down at me and patted my head. "Whatever gives you the motivation I guess."

Tenza stood between us and smiled as well. "Okay then! Let's not waste any more time. We have to see how we get back and face that things back there-"

"Don't underestimate me." We all looked back and saw the thing that attacked us. Shion grabbed the three of us and pulled us back further until we were at a safe distance from the demon.

"Master Shion!" I knelt down with me and held onto Shion when we saw blood pouring from his neck.

"Huh? I thought I'd taken his head off. Not bad." The demon said almost bored.

I glared at it when it's in it's female form. I took off my scarf I always had with me and tightly but carefully ties it around Shion, making sure he could still breath and to stop the bleeding.

I remained by Shion's side and looked up to see Tenza taking care of the demon, I've heard about them, Zhú Jin. Tenza began to get deeply hurt with blood quickly covering his uniform, I can't let this happen. I placed my hand against Shion's back and I forced a smile and stared lovingly down at him.

Tenza had been bleeding since the demon continued to attack him, Shion's throat was almost cut where it would've killed him. Zhú Jin continued to hit Tenza many times but it kept on rising back and fighting.

I am determined to kill him.

Forgive me Master. I quickly rose up and began to move forward and I pushed Tenza aside and shouted for him to get back to safety.

"You almost killed my friends just for fun. Prepare to die!" I swung my sword forward and groaned when Zhú Jin seemed to enjoy this.

I watched it move quickly and continued to fight with its hands. I felt a strong pain in my chest and I fell almost to my knees and began to couch, blood came out, my hands began to shake when I saw more blood on them. Am I seriously in danger? Will I die? No, I won't. I promised to continue to live and to marry Shion.

At the same time it had sliced me, it also sliced my sword, easily breaking it in half.

I took out the kunai from my uniform and held onto it, He..she..no they are powerful, very strong but I'll make sure to kill it. I won't let Shion, Tenza or even Nurugai die.

Holding onto the kunai tightly I began to dodge the demons attacks and jump back when it almost hit me again.

"(Y/N)!" I heard Shion and Tenza shouting my name. Nurugai not far ahead wanting to help as well, but she would be easily killed if she were to get in the way.

"I'm close to killing! Don't worry I can handle it." I lied feeling my limbs heavy and growing tired of keeping up with the demon. Zhú Jin continued to bleed heavily but kept on regenerating the wounds.

I've never seen something fight this so strong and faster. A human and a demon, the demon will surely come on top and kill the opponent.

Tears began to form in my eyes as I continued to hold onto my kunai and try to continue standing.

"Quit fighting, (Y/N)! You'll only get yourself killed!" Shion shouted for me.

I forced a smile on my face and now felt the tears flowing down my face. "Then I'll die then, if it means that you and Tenza make it out alive then I'll happily give up my life!"

The demon continued to easily dodge my attacks. I kept on fighting with a smile on my face, remembering the many times Shion and I spent time together with my student and Tenza all together.

I cherished spending every time I had with Shion. Wether he saw me as a friend or not. If I were to someday reincarnate, I wouldn't mind going through the same if it means that I would meet with Shion again.

"Take Tenza and Nurugai with you!."

"(Y/N)!!" I felt bad hearing Shion call out to me, no scream my name. I never him so angry before.

"I'm grateful I got to meet you, Shion." I whisper and I looked over to him and smiled with tears running down my cheeks.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

"(Y/N)? What are you doing?" I heard Shion coming to join me outside once we had finished working for the day.

I enjoyed the sun light and stared up at the beautiful cherry blossoms and felt so peaceful being here, like this with him. I felt a nice breeze and saw the beautiful sakura petals falling down from the trees and onto the ground.

"The cherry blossoms are especially beautiful this season. It's a shame they don't last forever.." I said staring up and smiling staring in complete awe at the flowers.

What wouldn't I give to stay like this forever and enjoy my life with Shion by ourselves.

"Wouldn't it be lovely to get married at a time like this?" I joke knowing he mustn't feel the same for me.

I enjoyed the seasons cool breeze and felt a few sakura petals land on my clothes and hair. I hummed surprised when I felt Shion's hand on my hair, picking up a sakura flowers that fell on me. He moved my hair to the side and placed it above my ear.

"When this is all over. I'll make your dream and wishes come true."

I gasped lightly and stared up to look at Shion smiling down at me with a slight blush across his face, I blushed as well and smiled wide looking at him as I placed my hand above his.

"We'll get married then and have lots of children."

Shion continued to smile as he nodded, "I did swear to myself that I would find and be with you until the very end."

Shion and I held hands until I felt him leaning down and pressing his lips against mine.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

I stared at the demon surprised and I felt a sharp sensation inside me, y eyes slowly wandered down to my chest shocked looked at the demon, the being expressionless. The kunai I had saved so dearly, was stabbed right through my heart.

"Shion…I.."

I coughed up blood and began to feel weaker and dizzy. I began to stumble a bit but could feel someone trying to say my name, I looked to the side and smiled at Shion.

Though already defeated I wanted him to know that I would depart this world happy and not scared or sad.

I heard footsteps running away and could see Tenza and Nurugai being taken away from the scene. I finally fell down to my knees and couldn't sense a thing, strange I've received many cuts and had a blade through tm heart but I can't feel a thing.

The being known as Zhú Jin held onto my hair tightly when I fell down to my knees and kept looking down at me, displaying no emotions whatsoever.

I could see his lips moving but couldn't understand what he said. He let go of me making me fall onto my own puddle of blood on the grass. I fell to the side and could feel my body getting cold and numb.

I was now alone. I fell onto my back and stared up at the bright blue sky and it's many beautiful flowers. I know Shion will be alright without me, he's a strong man, despite many years of being lonely and feeling worthless.

Shion was the first man, this person to ever show me kindness and love. The only man who I ever fell in love it. Someday.. we'll meet each other again and no matter happens I'll continue to fight for and with him.

My eyes adjusted to the clear sky and I felt my breathing beginning to slow down, and slowly I wrapped my hands around my necklace, the cold ring resting against my chest.

Don't give up one hope, Shion. I'll continue to protect you just as you did with me. I smiled to myself and slowly felt like I was being embraced by my adoptive parents, their warmth around tm shoulders.

I will continue to love you Shion…until we meet again.

#hell's paradise #hells paradise #shion x reader #yamada shion #gabimaru the hollow #yamada asaemon #yamada asaemon shion #hell's paradise x reader #anime 2023 #yamada asaemon tenza #studio mappa #yamada asaemon shion x reader

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anthemofgvf · 2 years ago

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Endless Summer: Josh Kiszka x Reader Fanfiction

Part One

description: you and sammy have been best friends since you were kids, and being around his family was the norm your entire life. when invited to a trip to their family lake house during the summer, you find yourself spending more time with his brother than your best friend. and, one thing has been clear your entire friendship: brothers are off limits.

warnings for this series: alcohol and marijuana usage, explicit content (18+, minors dni), angst, swearing

word count: 5.7k

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From the moment you met Sammy in grade school, fourth grade to be exact, you and him instantly clicked. Like two puzzle pieces that were missing to complete a full picture, he was the only person that you could truly confide in. Sure, you had other friends, but Sammy was different from the rest. He understood you better, noticed your different quirks and could predict your emotions with a single look in examination of your demeanor. He was undeniably sharp-witted with that kind of thing, and that seemed to run in the family.

Being friends with Sam for so long meant you would eventually be introduced to his adoring family, who all were very similar yet so unique to their own personalities. You remember going over to his house during summer after the fourth grade, and you finally got to meet his family: his sister, his parents, and his twin brothers.

For twins, they were quite different in the way they perceived themselves. Both had similar interests and could speak to each other without uttering a sound, but the one that captivated your interest the most was Josh. Sure, Jake's bad-boy phase was somewhat enticing to you, as you and Sam were a few years younger than the both of them, but Josh could make a room that once felt dark into a bright room full of kaleidoscopic color, and that's what drew you to him most.

Once you and Sam matured more, your topic of discussion became, well, a bit more adult. It never crossed your mind to think of starting a relationship with one of his siblings, because that seemed to be a given. But, since you were the opposite gender, Sammy felt as though the unspoken rule between you two had to be set down and defined.

"Absolutely under no circumstances do I want you to ever date one of my brothers."

And after that discussion one day as you and him neared the end of middle school, it was never spoken of again. Sure, you poked fun at him at the idea when you wanted to twist his nerves and see his face grow red with anger, but you never seriously considered it.

That was until the twins blossomed into high school and finished their senior year. And you were stuck with two more years of high school.

It should have never been a thought that crossed your mind. It was easier to keep fully platonic feelings towards Jake, as he always had some girl stuck by his side and you and him always kept your conversations short and sweet, but Josh, Josh was just different. He was a talker, and he never missed the opportunity to join a conversation with you and Sam or catch you alone and discuss anything that popped into his brain. Maybe it was the way he captivated your attention with the small, affectionate touch of his hand, or his witty comments that made you squeal with laughter. But you couldn't help but feel your heart twist at the thought of being something more.

But you were too young - younger than him, and you knew Josh most likely just considered you his "little sister" because you've always been that way since you were 9. Even though he never referred to you as his sister, it seemed like the obvious answer in what you and his relationship was.

Once you finally graduated high school with your best friend, everything was uphill from there. More freedom, more trips, and more time to spend with the people you considered your extended family. You always thought of Sammy like a brother, but it ended at that. Just Sammy and Jake, not Josh. It just seemed like you had a different relationship with him, or maybe that was a false reality you tricked yourself into believing.

When 2019 rolled around, and you were near the end of finishing your college degree, Sammy invited you to their family lake house during the summer. Just you, Sammy, Jake, and Josh. It wasn't necessarily a lake house, more so like a cabin, but you've all referred to it as such due to it being near the lake that you all would swim in as kids.

"We've got the whole trip planned out," Sam spoke to you over the phone, "going out to the lake, maybe a drive to the beach, the late-night talks around the campfire; all of it."

"You don't think they would mind me coming along on your all-boy's trip?" You ran your fingers through your hair, fixing your gaze on the bustling trees outside your window.

"Well, you're family. And, since Danny couldn't come, we have an extra room up for grabs. I can't think of anyone else to invite."

"So, I wasn't your first choice? Ouch." You joked, falling onto your bed as you listened to Sammy's huffed laugh.

"Listen, I didn't think you'd really want to go and spend a part of your summer with two boys and a strong, independent man. You-."

"You're referring to yourself as the man, Sammy?" You cut him off with a giggle, as if you needed the clarification.

"Shut up." He sighed; his voice laced with slight annoyance at your teasing. You could practically hear his eyes roll. "Besides the point, I think you should come. It'll be fun, I promise. It's only for a few weeks anyways. And, if you're not having a good time, which I doubt, I'll gladly drive you back home."

You pondered the idea for a moment. Your original plan was to spend time with a few friends from college, and also take a relaxing break off of work to focus on rejuvenating yourself for your fourth and final year of college. It was only for a few weeks though, so it wouldn't dent your plans by any means other than set them back a bit. Besides, you hadn't been to their lake house in what seems like an eternity. You'd been up there a few times with yours and his family, but only when you were kids. You'd taken a single trip during winter break when you were a sophomore in high school, but that was the end of it. It was always surrounded with family, and not just the four of you.

You clicked your tongue and thought for a moment longer before responding. "Yeah, yeah I'll go." You tugged at your bottom lip to contain your squeal of excitement as your mind ran through the things you wanted to do, hell, what to pack for the trip.

"Yeah! Alright!" Sam exclaimed. "We'll come grab you tomorrow, alright? Should give you enough time to say your goodbyes, pack, and all of that shit."

"Okay, alright. See you tomorrow." You said with excitement laced in your voice, and you pressed the red hang-up button on your phone and leaped off your back from your bed.

Bringing it up to your parents that you'd be going on such a trip wasn't an issue whatsoever. Again, they considered the Kiszka's like an extended family, and you going on that trip was like going with the siblings you never had on a summer vacation. And, you were staying in Michigan, so there wasn't an issue with proximity.

You'd seen Sam time and time again when he wasn't touring with his brothers and Danny, mainly because you had a closer bond with him, but not so much with interactions on Jake and Josh's side. Sure, they'd come over every now and then for dinners, but those were spread alongst the time span of a few months. You hoped they hadn't changed since you last saw them, but it sparked your mind with thoughts of what could possibly be different about them.

As you started to pack, picking out your favorite summer outfits and throwing them into a large blue suitcase, your mind kept wondering about those summer nights that would be spent outside surrounded by a small firepit with the boys. You hadn't spent this kind of time with them in a long time, and things were different: you all four were adults now. It wasn't as if you four hadn't hung out like adults, but this trip was vastly different than a casual dinner. You were spending time with the three of them for a month in a confined space, and practically every second of the day.

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The next morning rolled around, and you were abruptly woken up by Sammy shaking you out of your slumber.

You groaned unsatisfactorily and squinted your eyes, bringing the backs of your hands to them as you made out his figure that was outlined by the summer sun's rays of orange and yellow.

"What time is it?" You spoke hoarsely.

"10:17." He examined the time on his phone before meeting your eyes again. "Now c'mon, don't want to be waiting on you all day. Got a big day ahead of us." He gave you a satisfied smile.

You exhaled deeply as you crawled out of bed, making your way to your closet and lazily picking out the first shirt and pair of shorts you could find.

"I'll be five minutes tops, promise." You extended your pointer finger towards him.

With a single nod from him, you abandoned him in your room to change in your bathroom, and hastily got ready for the day. You decided to ditch the makeup to cut time down, only focusing on the necessities of your morning routine.

When you met Sam back in your room, you found your suitcase and tucked your toiletries in the front pocket as you beamed a smile towards him.

"15 minutes has to be some sort of record time for you, y/n." He swiped his finger under his nose, looking down at you with a perky smirk.

"You're lucky I decided not to dry my hair." You shot a glare, intended to be playful, and received a soft chuckle from your friend.

After you had said your final goodbyes to your parents, Sam followed you out of your home and escorted you to Josh's infamous white Jeep that glistened under the sunlight, with the doors taken off along with the roof of the car itself. Although the humidity already had your loose shirt sticking to your skin, you knew the warm breeze on the duration of the drive would let you grow comfortable with the thick air.

Sam slid your suitcase into the trunk and rushed his way to the front door to secure his place, and you settled with defeat as you wrapped your hand around the handle of the back door.

"Sam, why don't you let her sit up front? The lady always should be given the front seat. Has y/n taught you nothing on being a gentleman?" Josh spoke with a crooked smile.

Sam glared at his brother, accepting his fate and opening the door to gain you access in the front seat. With a small giggle, you shrugged, and hopped in.

"Alright kids, everyone buckled?" He turned his head to his twin, then Sam, and landed his eyes on you.

This was the first time you had actually caught a glimpse of Josh. His eyes were shielded by thick black sunglasses, with the sides of them nearly covered by his hair. Although his face was the same, he had seemed to grow thinner, in the sense of losing any baby fat he still had clinging onto him. And his hair, bigger than before, ran loose chestnut brown curls. Jake, on the other hand, only grew his hair longer, seemingly surpassing Sam.

You gave Josh a nod with a small, assuring smile, and he set off on the road at a high speed. Looking back at Sam, your eyes fell on Jake, who immediately caught your attentive look, and gave you a small wave with his calloused fingers.

As the drive went on, and Josh harmonizing to the music or starting a simple conversation about nothing, you let your head rest on the seat as the summer air whipped your face pleasurably. It was a perfect day for a drive as such, with the wind cooling the hot sun that liked to slap at your skin and send UV rays to start a light tan. As your relaxation set in more, you realized how much you missed this; spending time with the three of them. Having them around held you at ease.

"Have you been informed of the itinerary for today?" Josh spoke loudly over the barking wind.

You shook your head no, suppressing your laughter as you noticed his hair flying around manically. Sam and Josh combated the wind with tying their hair up, along with you, but Josh didn't seem to care that the breeze tangled in his curls.

"Well, once we get there, we're uh..." Josh furrowed his brows for a moment, "what are we doing again?" He slightly turned his head towards the back seat.

"Unpacking then heading to the lake." Jake chimed in, to which Josh responded with a comical "ah" in remembrance.

"Right! So, to reiterate what Jake said, we're going to unpack then head to the lake. Sound like a plan?"

"Yeah." You yelled over the wind with a vigorous nod, just to clarify your agreement in case the wind drowned out your voice.

Although the drive was a near two hours to arrive at Cloverdale, time passed by swiftly. Upon arrival, you all jumped out of Josh's car and walked with your own suitcases and bags into the familiar yet foreign lake house.

You took a quiet, deep breath as you stepped inside, memories of running around the place until you were utterly exhausted flooded your brain. Your eyes scanned the large wooden walls, examining the artwork and family photos littered around the living room.

"You know where your room is?" Sam took his place at your side.

"Well, there's four rooms from what I remember, and I'm assuming you all had your fair-share of bickering about who gets which one. I'll just take whichever isn't occupied." You rocked on your heels as you raised your brows, turning your attention back to scaling the walls with your eyes.

"You'll be glad to know that we left the master bedroom to you." He smiled proudly.

"Are, are you sure? Because I don't mind staying in-."

"Y/n, are you seriously going to turn down the biggest room in the cabin?" He huffed a laugh with an open-mouthed smile.

"No, no. I'm not. Just surprised you didn't call it first." You jeered playfully, which caused Sammy to send a light punch onto your forearm.

He led you upstairs to the bedroom, which was a few feet from the one he'd be staying in, and stopped in his tracks as you continued stepping through the room. It was quite spacious for a seemingly small exterior of the house. You hadn't been in this room, mainly because it was reserved for their parents, but you'd seen a small portion of it every time you would pass by it. There were two nightstands, one on either side of the bed, and a large dresser that laid on the wall in front of it, along with a mirror. And, you even got your own bathroom, with white tiles stuck onto the walls and a shower with sunflower curtains, and a small window.

"You get the royal treatment." Sam spoke to break the silence.

Your head whipped around to him.

"Which I rightfully deserve." You fully turned your body, placing your hand on your chest.

"Don't act so high and mighty princess because you've got the biggest bedroom. I'm right next door, and I have no issue with kicking you out." He challenged.

"That's if I don't kick you out of your room first for snoring too loud." You shot back, which caused Sam to laugh.

"Hey! At least I don't wake up in a pool of drool every morning." He folded his arms together, lacing his voice with sass.

"I do not drool, Sam!" Your mouth hung open in a smile.

"In fact, you got a little..."

"Settle down, children! No fighting!" Josh peaked his head into the bedroom.

You both fixed your attention on Josh, as the corners of his lips rose while he flicked his eyes between the both of you.

"Do you two plan to join us at the lake?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Yeah, just give me a few to change." You nodded, looking over to Sam.

He agreed with your statement and left you alone in the room to give you the privacy you needed to remove your clothing and dress into your swimsuit.

You packed a few options, but today you chose a bikini that squeezed at your breasts, with scattered daisies on the top and your bottoms that hugged at your waist.

You found a sheer, white dress to throw over your swimsuit, and sandals to match along with a pair of sunglasses to protect your eyes from the unforgiving sun.

Getting to the lake was just a short walk, and you set your belongings on the ground as everyone admired the sight in front of them: large trees of emerald, green that shadowed the lake, but not enough to fully hide the sun from the calm waters. There was a walkdown to the lake, along with a cliff high up enough to jump off into the water, and your thoughts immediately told you that that was going to be everyone's ticket into the lake.

As your eyed roamed on everyone, who seemed too caught up in the spectacular view to care where your eyes laid, you found yours on Josh. His figure was leaner now, with a toned back and sporting grey swim trunks that hung dangerously low on his hips. You watched as he strode over to the cliff, then his brothers following in line. You stripped yourself of your dress and followed shortly behind, catching up with Sam.

Everyone glanced over at each other, as if they were all unsure of who was going to take the leap of faith first.

"Ladies first." Sam pushed your back towards the edge of the cliff, causing you to quickly plant your feet into the ground to keep you from falling.

"Since when did you become such a gentleman? Are you scared?" You turned your head towards him.

"No, I've done this jump before. But you, from what I recall, haven't."

"I call bullshit." Jake chuckles, which causes Josh to run his hands over his mouth to barely cover his toothy smile.

"You guys don't remember two summers ago when we came here?" Sam threw his hands up in defense, looking at his brothers for recognition in his memory. They both just stared blankly at him, either to pretend not to remember or simply because they had no recollection of it, to which Sam huffed a sigh and rested his hands on his hips.

"You're all a bunch of chickens." Jake pushed past you three and gave himself a small running start before leaping off the cliff and yelping in excitement.

The sound of crashing waves hit at the pit of your stomach, and your fear of heights became more apparent as you shifted on your feet.

"I second that." Josh stated with a wiggle of his finger. And with a loud, animalistic yell, he ran off the edge of the cliff and manically flew in the air, falling fast to the water and crashing swiftly.

"You want me to go first?" Sam looked at you as he sucked on his cheek.

"I might just take the long way down." You shrugged, taking another look off the edge of the cliff before meeting his eyes again.

"Don't tell me you're scared." He gasped, acting surprised.

"Yeah, like you're not scared shitless yourself." You glared at him.

He hummed, standing silently for a moment before he held you in his arms, lifting you off of your feet and running off the cliff before you had any chance to speak in defiance.

Once you landed in the water fully submerged, you pushed yourself out of Sam's grip, waiting until he popped up from above the water to splash him in anger. It only made him laugh, rubbing the water off his face and slicking it into his hair.

"Fuck you." You spat.

"It wasn't that bad, was it?" Sam spoke innocently.

"Well, no, but-."

"You just needed a push, or perhaps in your situation, someone to take you down with them." Josh extended his pointer-finger at you, laughing as you rolled your eyes in annoyance.

You all floated in the water, both Josh and Jake taking turns jumping off the cliff a few more times to satisfy their drive for thrill. Sam had only joined them once, but you chose to just stay in the cool water and cheer them on as they came down.

But, in the charismatic way he always did, Josh convinced you to follow him back up to the cliff to jump once more.

"I can't believe I let you talk me into this, Joshua." You shakily exhaled, examining the seemingly high drop down to the water. But you were just barely able to make out Sam and Jake's faces.

"Well, there's no turning back now. Unless you choose embarrassment, that is." He smiled coyly.

You pushed Josh's shoulder back, and took one more look down the cliff. God, you never knew how afraid of heights you were until this very moment. How unsteady your breath became at the thought of plummeting to your death, even though it was completely safe.

But Josh knew how fearful you were. He didn't want to force you into jumping on your own, simply because by the looks of it, you weren't ready.

So, as you both neared the edge of the cliff, he pressed your back against his slick chest and wrapped his toned arms around your body and launched you off the cliff with him.

As if the jump down from the cliff couldn't seem to last longer, your arms wrapped around his neck as you clung tightly to him. You rested your head against your arm that snaked around his neck, seemingly losing hearing. But all you felt was his body pressed against yours tightly. How much of a strong grip he had that seemed to relieve your body of any fear and coax you into relaxation. Him pressed against your lower half tight enough to just feel the outline of himself against your bottom. Frankly, you'd only been this close to Josh a few times, and you were ignorant for forgetting what it was like. Because he had your heart skipping a few beats, and pretending for a split second it was just you and him in this world - in this place.

The whole innocence of it all quickly swallowed up your feelings as he pushed away from you to deflect your squirming body once you both hit the water, and you floated above the surface and gave Josh a downturned smile.

And frankly, he was the only one who could make your lips curl under in that way.

Your eyes guiltily found Sam's, but to your surprise, he was just laughing. Laughing at the whole thing like he was when he jumped with you in his arms. He didn't seem to care it was Josh this time that was fully pressed against you, because you were like family to them.

Right?

As you all made your way to the bottom of the dirt path that would lead you back to your lake house, you hugged your body in the towel you packed whilst following the boys. They just let the air dry the beads of salty water off their skin, and you just shivered under the fabric of your towel.

You found your eyes lingering once more onto Josh, who led the group, but stood far enough to the right to let you sneakily peak at him once more. His towel hung around his shoulders, and his hips swaying as he traveled barefoot up the hill. You wanted to tear your eyes from him. Sam would catch onto you if you continued to let your thoughts consume you and just gawk at his brother, so you fixed your eyes on anything surrounding, like the trees that softly sang with the breeze, or the birds that chirped melodically in the sky.

Once you all made it back, you parted ways for a much-needed shower to rinse off the salty lake water and cool your bodies from the fiery sun that blistered at your skin on the walk back.

As you stepped out of the shower, and the dripping water tapped at your feet, you quickly dried off and braided your hair, flipping it behind your shoulder and grabbing some articles of clothing to throw on.

Someone barged into your room without warning, which didn't surprise you. You knew it was Sam. Perhaps it was because you two have known each other for so long that he stopped caring, or he never walked in on you when it wasn't appropriate.

"You have to learn to knock, Sam. I could've been naked!" You peaked your head through the opening of the bathroom.

"What a sight." He widened his eyes playfully and folded his arms together. "We're grabbing food."

You stepped out of the bathroom and followed him downstairs to meet his brothers who were slumped on the couch, waiting for your arrival.

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Once the sun rested beneath the ground and the moon lit up the sky, you all joined around the firepit that overlooked a large mountain, with waters laying in the crevice and trees that lined it. You missed the scenery this place had to offer, and no words could describe how euphoric it felt to be back in this place after so many years. You absent-mindedly listened to the chatter of the boys as you took in the view and paid them no attention.

What did pull you out of your trance was Jake slowly strumming his guitar to a familiar melody, one that took you back in time for a split moment to the blissful memory that was created the last time you stepped foot in Cloverdale.

It was "Rocky Mountain High", by John Denver, one of Josh's favorite songwriters. You knew that because you heard him beg Jake to learn the song for him so he could add his vocals to it.

Hearing Josh sing on your radio or phone was never like hearing him sing live, right in front of you, in an intimate setting that let you soak in a practically out-of-body experience. Something about his raw voice with Jake's skilled playing was something you rarely got to hear, as you never had the opportunity to come to one of their live shows due to school always being your number one priority.

You examined Josh as you hummed along, watching as his face contorted while he exhaled symphonies from his throat, glancing over at Jake for a few moments as he continued singing along in perfect pitch. Sam quietly sang along, and eventually, you joined in.

It was moments like these that made you feel like life was worth living. As the fire crackled calmly and lit each and every one of you with orange rays, you took a sip from your beer that Sam graciously grabbed for you without asking. You rested in your lawn chair, bopping your head along to Josh's voice.

"You doing alright?" Sam leaned towards you as Jake's guitar set as background music, and Josh nodded his head along to give his brother the spotlight.

"Couldn't be better, honestly. I forgot how much I missed this." You nodded your head towards the twins and met his eyes again. "You're so lucky you get to experience this every day."

"Not so much fun when their performance doesn't call for my help." He let his face relax into a smile, leaning his head back and watching his brothers through hooded eyes.

You just huffed a laugh to his response, and mimicked his motions as the twins finished the song and led into another.

Sam rested his hand on the back of your shoulder, signaling he was going to head back into the lake house, and you told him you'd stay up for a bit and you'd see him in the morning. Shortly after, Jake followed him inside after finishing another song, slipping his acoustic into its case and trotting off through the cracked door.

You looked over to Josh, who took a swig from his beer and met your eyes with a soft smile. He pushed himself out of his chair and took Sam's seat, hopping into it with a "hmph" and watching the fire slowly die.

"Thanks." You murmured at the fire. Josh shot you a confused look, waiting for you to clarify. "For, uh, jumping into the water with me. It was nice of you do that." You gave him a tight-lipped smile.

He nodded. "Oh, yeah. No worries. I could tell you were scared."

"Well, you didn't have to bring it up." You pushed your tongue into your cheek as your mouth hung into a smile.

"And you didn't have to follow me up there." He wiggled his finger at you with a comical smile.

"How was I supposed to say no when everyone's eyes were on me?" You defended yourself.

"You make a valid point, y/n." He tilted his head up.

You averted your eyes back to the fire for a moment, before he started speaking again.

"How's school going? Excited to finally finish?"

"You wouldn't believe, Josh." You looked back over to him.

His eyes held you softly, as if he was captivating your entire presence and grasping it with his heart. Although that's how he always looked at anyone when listening to someone, it never failed to make your heart drop in your chest and your lips downturn into a wickedly adoring smile.

"Once you're finished, maybe you can start joining us on the road." He shrugged, bringing his glass bottle to his lips.

"And be some sort of roadie?" You furrowed your brows.

"I don't think you'd be able to lift any of the equipment, other than a guitar case or symbol."

"That's quite presumptuous of you to say." You shook your head.

As if you could ever be annoyed at him, this was the moment to wipe that stupid smile off your face and make him feel the slightest bit of guilt for his words, even if he was joking.

But you couldn't. No matter what you thought about, no matter what you said, all you could do was just melt into his eyes and forget everything around you. He had that way of making you feel like the only person in the room, and you let yourself forget that while he was gone. But, God, it wrenched at your heart to be in this moment with him and remember that funny feeling that only he had power to create.

"I think we'd all appreciate your company, especially Sam. He seems to miss you a lot."

"That could be because we rarely did anything without each other for like 10 years," you flung your hand out as you spoke, "and I miss spending time with him, and you and Jake. Life just has its ways of bombarding your plans with its inconvenience."

"Couldn't have stated it better myself, y/n." He raised his bottle towards you and took another small sip of the alcohol.

The way your name rolled off his tongue was like flowers blossoming in your ears and creating an entire garden that you wish you could breathe in every day. How each syllable slightly rested on his tongue and captivated your attention no matter what. You just wished you could record him saying your name on a continuous loop, just to satisfy your own desire of hearing it more often.

He stood from his chair, and you watched his every move as he grabbed the few bottles he drank from and grazed his eyes around to make sure he wouldn't leave anything behind.

Without a verbal response, you followed his motions, holding your unfinished bottle and following him back into the lake house where you dumped whatever was left and discarded your bottle.

As you stepped out of the kitchen and headed to the stairs, you whipped your head to Josh, who was standing at the foot of the first step.

"Goodnight." He whispered, letting the corners of his lips relax into a smile.

You nodded and repeated him, then let yourself continue up the stairs.

You stripped off your clothes that smelt of amber and burnt wood and slipped into an oversized shirt and your underwear. Despite packing shorts, it was warm in the house, and fewer articles of clothing would cool your body temperature quicker.

Once you slipped under your covers and let yourself sink into the bed, your mind wandered about the significant moments of the day. But, as always, your mind favored the memory of Josh holding you close to his chest, and spending time with him alone by the fire.

You couldn't shake off the feeling of his soaked, lightly tan skin pressed against your back, even though deeply down you didn't want to forget. The way his fingers imprinted on your arms and gripped them tightly enough to show you his full strength. The way his steady breath hit your neck and had goosebumps raise onto your skin just for a moment before his chin rested over your shoulder. But the goosebumps stayed, and your heart rate only increased.

Shutting your eyes was just a quiet prayer that your thoughts would escape your mind and let you have peace over the torturous but satisfying scenarios. But your mind continued to attack your heart and take the high ground, and you just reminded yourself that there was no way you and Josh, in any scenario, could work.

After all, Sam had made it very clear to you your entire friendship that brothers were off limits, no matter what. And ruining your relationship with your best friend wasn't worth letting your emotions take the best of you and give into your fantasies of being with Josh.

And besides, Josh was not interested in you, and that was another point that helped decrease your delusions and let you finally rest your eyes.

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taglist: @sacredjake @aureatopia @myeyehurtz @alexiagx

-part two-

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