#i need it printed in my brain
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My heart is doing backflips and there's a literal zoo in my stomach HWHSHSHAISHSJA
x : BETWEEN LOVE AND LIES :*+゚
in which: you thought nagi was dating you for media reputation... so why does this relationship feel suspiciously real?
warnings: 11.9k words, pro-soccer player!nagi x physiotherapist!gn!reader, reader has hair, lots of food, not at all a realistic story but that's okay pls don't come for me, SLOOWWWWBURN, fake-dating au, reader is oblivious :<
a/n: goodness. if this flops i will cry bc i spent way too long this for it to be healthy for me. enjoy !
↳ 5K EVENT MASTERLIST ༉‧₊
nagi approaches you the day after his name goes viral.
you weren’t doing anything spectacular, merely putting away all the kits and equipment you’d used for the day when the white-haired soccer player approaches you, his hands in his pockets, strolling over to you as he would on any occasion.
your heart races- as it does whenever he’s around, regardless of said occasion, but what tumbles out of his mouth next was worthy of ceasing your heart rate all together.
“wanna date?”
you’re speechless. malfunctioning as you register what he’s saying. the sheer casualness of it all is alarming and you have to snap yourself back into your physical environment before your mind loses to a universe of questions and doubts.
out of all people who have asked you to date, nagi was definitely the most unique. was he okay in the head? did he come for a check up? did he get one of rin’s kicks to the head? or was he just straight up delusional?
“uhh, why?” you ask, cursing yourself a little for how disgusted you sounded.
fortunately for you, your ungracious tone didn’t phase him, not one bit. “isn’t that what two people do when they like each other?”
yeah, romantically. you don’t even think nagi likes you beyond simply platonic, whereas you have to try and shove your feelings for him down your throat every morning before walking in to the training grounds for blue lock’s official team.
you find yourself agreeing regardless, still a little overwhelmed by everything that was going on.
the soccer player then has the audacity to give you two thumbs up in approval, a dumb smile plastering on that expression of his. this confuses you even more.
“okay cool, so what should we do now that we’re a couple?” he asks.
you glance away, unable to look him in the eye for too long without getting flustered. the various weights and foam rollers still scattered on the floor catches your attention, reminding you of your previous task before nagi came to stir up a storm. “well, i have to put these away amongst various things. you can sit on the couch if you want to pass time?”
“do you need any help?” he questions, already bobbing down to be eye-level with you, ignoring the second half of your statement.
“no it’s fine, thank you though.”
“are you sure?”
“yeah! i don’t want to bother you.”
“well if you do this all by yourself, it’ll take longer, and you take longer, it means i have to wait longer to spend time with you.”
when you turn around to say something, the words die on your throat when you realise just how close he’d come to you during the time you had your back towards him. a flash of hurt crosses his typically emotionless eyes when you instinctively recoil from him, his innocent stare dimishing just a little.
“you know how much i hate waiting. it’s such a pain, so let me help out and you’ll get done faster, right?” his hands are already reaching for some of the foam rollers before you can stop him. with an affectionate sigh, you take it from him, placing it back in its original spot.
“fine,” you say with a smile. “if you insist then would you mind putting the ice packs in the fridge? isagi’s ankle was messing up earlier and chigiri came in for his knee again.”
the white-haired hums before obeying, his footsteps that shuffled along the floor telling you know that he is carrying out his duties that you’ve assigned for him. the way his tracksuit makes a noise every time he walks is distracting, but you can’t help but think how much nagi reminds you of a penguin. the adorableness of it all might just kill you.
if only the internet and ‘#nagi seishiro’ tags knew just how much of a teddy bear that 6’3, legendary prodigy, nagi seishiro was, and how you had to massage him almost everyday after training sessions otherwise he’d come to practise the next day with the resolve of a five year old.
being a junior physiotherapist for the blue lock team, you only took care of a few blue lock athletes as your clients since the team was divided between you and a senior physio. nagi wasn’t one of your assigned athletes, however when you first came to the job, he would come during almost closing times (when you had no one booked) and ask for a massage, even if he had his own physiotherapist to request that of. however, nagi seemed to always have some sore muscle because his demands for a massage became a daily recurrence.
you just hope whatever is wrong with him gets sorted out soon.
sure athletes are meant to work hard and use their bodies in the field but physio massages were to assist with injuries by minimising the risk of them, fixing the alignment, or help extend any limited range of movement.
whatever. now’s not the time to think too hard about it because you’re about to go on a date with nagi seishiro.
after cleaning up your space so you could prepare to take care of more athletes tomorrow, nagi is sauntering over to you once more. this time, he drapes himself all over you, causing you to stumble a little from how heavy he is. you pray to whoever’s listening that he can’t feel or hear the way your heart races in your chest, threatening to climb up your throat and jump into his hands.
“tired, nagi?” you question, words muffled against his shoulder as you bring your hands to soothingly pat his back.
“yeah,” whines the white-haired. the smile that creeps onto your face is one full of adoration for the man slung over you. “let me take you out.”
“where to?”
“a night market? it’ll be fun.”
“sure.”
at your confirmation, he separates from you with an excited glimmer in his eyes,
after grabbing your bags and setting out, you’re violently flooded by dozens of paparazzi and interviewers who are click their cameras in hopes of catching blue lock’s soccer player who has taken the world by storm. it’s a little overwhelming, but when nagi covers you from the reporters with his arm which had his tracksuit jacket draped over it, you’re thankful for his thoughtfulness, especially when you’re relying on his grip around your waist to pull you in the right direction.
the crowd is shouting a flurry of things, nothing that you can make out amongst the mess of your mind, your heart, and your ears.
it’s not until you decipher someone shouting something about dating rumours with a japanese pop singer, that you piece together his intentions; a loud wakeup call to the reality of your ‘situation’ with nagi.
the possibility that nagi was using this ‘relationship’ for media coverage and acknowledgement was very likely, especially with his recent growth in popularity and social media following- it would be understandable if he wanted to prolong his moment in the spotlight by entering beneficial relationships.
except typically, celebrities would do it with other celebrities.
so what’s the appeal behind using you?
a funny feeling brews in your gut, one that clawed at your chest with a series of disappointment, anxiety, and dismay. it was unbelievable that someone as hot, both literally and figuratively, as nagi would be interested in you; a junior physiotherapist fresh out of university, but you had hoped. his abruptness today and the whole ‘we should date’ ordeal was to dispel the media from his back, not bred from any genuine feelings.
if this was the only chance you got to stand beside nagi and have him hold you like this, so protectively against him, then you were going to take it until fate deemed it over and pulled you away from him itself.
you were young and simply put, nagi could provide the companionship you were looking for.
fortunately, the press left him alone at the parking lot where security guards were standing, two in the booth and one purchased near the gate. you give them a shy greeting and they return it with a bow.
“sorry about that,” nagi mutters, not looking at you even when you turn your head to stare up at him. “i wasn’t expecting paparazzi to be right outside, they’re such a pain.”
“it’s okay, if anything i owe you a thank you for covering me from them,” you huff, stuffing your hands into your pockets, mind still a little frazzled over the memory of how protective nagi was over you. “stuff like this happens when you’re famous, mr soccer hotshot.”
he rubs his neck, looking to the side as his next words tumble out of his mouth: “does that impress you?”
“why wouldn’t it?”
you try not to think too hard about the blush that manifests on his face, pinning it on the colder weather and frostbite rather than your words.
“so… where’s this night market? i didn’t know tokyo had many night markets.”
“just in shibuya.”
“won’t it be busy?”
“yeah,” he shrugs before adding as an afterthought: “does that bother you?”
“no not at all, i just thought you hated big crowds and busy places.”
“‘s won’t be so bad with you there.”
for someone who prefers to keep quiet majority of the time, nagi sure does have a silver tongue. this is probably the third time in the past half an hour that he’s made your stomach flip, and you can’t help but question his intentions. if he was trying to make you actually fall for him to make your relationship look more legitimate then he’d be disappointed to know that you already had, way before he approached you today.
he agrees to drive the way since one: it was easier and two: you could avoid the paparazzi that way.
upon arrival, you’re glad to see that there aren’t too many people in the crowd. since it was a weekday, students would be participating in extra curriculars and businessmen would be only just finishing work. the majority of the people here were older with a few couples here and there.
“oh, they have lemon tea,” nagi mutters, grabbing your hand before unceremoniously dragging you to the stand. his excitement was endearing, especially when all 6’3 of him approaches the lemon tea stand, needing to bend down in order to be seen by the elderly stand owner. a flash of surprise crosses the maker’s face as he makes eye contact with the white-haired.
“two lemon teas please,” requests the soccer player, using his hands to gesture ‘two’ as he fishes out the appropriate amount of money.
“hey, you’re that soccer player, nagi! you scored an awesome goal the other day. mind if i get a picture?” the owner’s gruff voice requests, a cheery smile making its way onto his face.
“oh. sure.”
you take the picture for them, counting down ‘3, 2, 1’ as nagi gives the camera a peace sign and the owner has a wide, bright smile on his face; so bright that you couldn’t help grinning as well. “i’m putting this on my store front. now you want two lemon teas?”
“coming right up!”
“did you just buy me a lemon tea without asking?” you question, a smile appearing on your features as you glance up at your companion.
he meets your eyes, “yeah, ‘s there something wrong with that?”
“no, not at all. i wouldn’t mind some lemon tea right now. i’ll pay you back.”
“don’t worry about that,” nagi cuts you off before you can even reach for your wallet. “everything’s on me.”
“but-”
“-it’s on me.”
the stand owner is handing over two iced cups of lemon before you can continue bickering and nagi hands one over to you with a wordless expression and you’re compelled to take it, though reluctantly.
“are you two a couple?” the owner asks.
nagi nods, “yeah, we are.”
“ah! no wonder. you two look amazing together, you bagged a real gem,” he says to nagi, pointing at you. you laugh it off, flattered.
“i know i did. thanks for the tea, sir.”
“thank you!” you call out to the owner before being dragged away by nagi again, careful not to spill your drink from how much vigour was in his steps. for his one stride, you had to take two.
after going from store to store and blindly following nagi who led the way with his stomach, you’re eventually brought to a less busy, picnic-like area where there were various benches for you to sit on. it was away from the busyness of the main street, but still had lanterns hung around the premise, combating the darkness of the early sunset during colder months.
you take a seat beside him whilst he sets down the variety of food he bought from the merchants, not trying to think too much about the way nagi presses himself closely against you.
“oh, one of my games had a character drop an hour ago,” he absentmindedly comments, opening his phone for the first time since being with you. you catch a glimpse of his dim phone screen, seeing the notification banner from the game he was referring to.
“that’s cool,” you mutter, unsure of what else to say as you take a bite into the red bean taiyaki.
“yeah, he’s a cracked character. been wanting him forever.”
“are you gonna pull? i wanna see him.”
“really?”
when you give him the nod of affirmation, nagi opens the game whilst you continue eating, gentle anticipation hanging in the air as well as a comfortable silence. it doesn’t take long before he’s purchasing special event tokens, going to the special character screen and pressing the ‘draw x10’ option. you peer over his shoulder, trying to resist the urge to rest your chin on it.
you’re snapped out of your reverie when nagi emits a small gasp. “no way.”
“what?” you ask, watching the way his screen lights up in gold which signalled a successful draw. he looks up at you, eyes wide and mouth partially parted. “did you get him?”
“yeah, on the first go,” he says in wonder, a dazed look in his eyes. “that’s never happened before.”
“no way! you’re so lucky!”
nagi’s face erupts into a small smile, and you’re caught off guard all of a sudden when his hands snake around your waist, pulling you up to sit on his lap. the new proximity and abruptness of it all causes your mind to stop for a second, shutting off as nagi peers up at you with stars in his eyes. you want to hide, but his grip around you is too tight, pulling you in to him.
this feels criminal.
“nah, i just think you’re my lucky charm.”
a quiet squeak of ‘is that so?’ is all you can reply with before looking away, trying to distract your rampant thoughts, hoping that the cool breeze will calm the heat creeping up to your face. “so,” you begin, trying to recover yourself from embarrassment. “can i see your characters? all of them?”
“all of them?” nagi repeats and you miss the small look of bliss on his expression.
“yeah.”
“i showed them to you the other week.”
“okay, well show me this new character then.”
“as you wish.”
he talks you through the characters and their tutorials, showing you their special combos and ultimate moves, all whilst you have to feed him the variety of foods he bought whilst dragging you around like a dog and its owner. as he munches on the takoyaki, kebabs, and sweet potato, you realise just how bottomless nagi’s stomach was and the way he hums in satisfaction after each bite was very adorable.
the night fades into a nice memory of laughter, emptied food boxes, and easy conversation. somehow nagi has manoeuvred himself so that his head was now in your lap, snowy hair spread so invitingly as you resist the urge to run your hands through it, wanting to respect any boundaries of his.
every so often you have to remind yourself that this wasn’t real.
reality hits you once more the following morning when you check social media just to see ‘#nagi seishiro’ trending all over again, all talking about the paparazzi photos that were taken yesterday. taking a glimpse for yourself, you hate the way your gut sinks, especially as articles with the title ‘nagi seishiro with a new lover?’ shine in your face.
it only solidifies your speculations about this (fake?) relationship, and despite coming to accept it, growing resentment poisons your system, rendering you incapable and bitter as you let your breakfast grow cold.
at least nagi correctly covered you with his jacket, your face is completely obstructed, only your body is revealed. you thank your lucky stars that you decided to not wear your ‘blue lock’ staff clothes that morning and just opted for your own athletic wear, that way your identity could be hidden at least just a little.
a message from reo captures your attention and you click on it immediately.
reo: is that you with nagi?
you: yeah!
reo: about fucking time. got sick of you two never doing anything.
you: haha 😐thanks reo 😐
reo: did he take you to the night market last night?
you: yeah! it was fun :)
reo: that’s good, nagi’s been waiting forever.
reo: don’t break his heart
you scoff at the irony of reo’s last text, typing something noncommittal before throwing your phone else where.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
the whole team practically knows about you and nagi when you return to work the following monday and the second you enter the building, you’re swarmed by the friendly faces of bachira, isagi, and chigiri, who are seemingly holding a tired nagi hostage. quite an amusing sight. three people, who are roughly a head shorter than the white-haired, restraining a lethargic 6’3 athlete with their bodies.
“are you really dating nagi?” isagi begins before you could even fit in a ‘hello’.
“uh… yeah?” you sound unsure; because you are. a fake relationship is still a relationship, it’s just that one party is more infatuated with the other.
“damn. i didn’t think it was real,” mutters chigiri. “are you sure? he’s not like… paying you to do this, right? you like like him?”
“yes?” you exclaim, a little overwhelmed. “i’m not getting any monetary returns even though i wish i did.” nagi narrows his eyes at you, you poke out your tongue. “please, no more questions, it’s way too early for this.”
“you don’t know how long we’ve been waiting for nagi to ask you out, y/n. even we placed money on him,” reveals isagi but before you could say anything in response, bachira cuts in, practically skipping up to the white-haired.
“finally grew some balls and asked, good job bro!” bachira sings, patting nagi on the back with a violet slap before disappearing.
“see you at practice, nagi!”
the three athletes disappear and you finally exhale after holding in a breath for what felt like ages. what an animated way to start the day.
you hold your breath again when nagi approaches to stop in front of you, a singular coffee cup in his hand; one that he holds out to you.
“good morning, nagi,” you greet.
“hey, i got you coffee.” instinctively, you take the cup from him, immediately warmed up by the heat emanating from it. “i hope it’s still warm. i’ve been waiting for you for a while.”
“you were waiting for me?”
“yeah. wanted to see you before going to training. makes my day less of a bother.”
you smile into your cup, trying to hide the effect that nagi has on you. you were so stupid for him it was insane.
“i’m sorry for making you wait, the trains were a little delayed this morning,” you confess, “but thank you. you’re very thoughtful, nagi.”
his face contorts into an ugly expression, a display of his feelings that are quickly quelled by the feeling of your cold hand grabbing his warm ones. “you take public transport to work?”
“i don’t want to pay for parking and everything. it’s not all bad, i get lovely views and a wake up call every morning.”
the white-haired athlete makes a face of contemplation briefly. “let me pick you up from now on.”
“no, it’s fine. i don’t want to be more of a hassle. i know how much you hate waking up to even just come to work so-”
“-i want to.”
your heart flutters at his insistence and all you can mutter out is a feeble ‘ok’ before slipping your hand out of his. you don’t know if you’ll ever be able to get used to the way nagi seishiro so effortlessly warms your insides; to the point that it becomes an unrecognisable pool of putty.
after a moment, you regain your senses. “you should be going off to practise. don’t make ego mad before the day even starts.”
he groans, “won’t you come and watch? i’ll feel a little better if you’re there.”
“i have my own work to get to but i don’t have many checkups today so if i can, i will.”
“i suppose that’s good enough,” mutters nagi before pulling you in for a loose hug, arms wounding around your waist, breathing you in before stepping back, as if rejuvenated by your touch and presence alone.
“work hard, nagi.”
you go your separate ways, him to the field and you to your office where various coworkers resided.
after a morning of answering emails, going to meetings and consulting the results from various body screenings, you finally have a chunk of time around 11:45 am to go and watch practice. as soon as you entered the training grounds, you’re a little stunned and impressed to see that they were all doing shooting drills, landing them perfectly with no effort, the harsh sound of shoe slapping against leather ringing throughout the area.
nagi notices you almost immediately, his eyes lighting up a little when you shoot him a small wave before wandering into the bleachers, taking a seat in a second row.
you continue watching, straightening up in your seat whenever it’s nagi’s turn, waiting to watch the genius at work. the results are no less than impressive every time but you have to pretend like you weren’t at all marvelling at him whenever he turns around and looks at you expectantly.
15 minutes later, ego calls for an hour lunch break, allowing the players to break off to do whatever their heart desires. the first thing nagi does is walk over to where you sit in the stands, leaning over the first row of chairs to reach you.
“why hello there, soccer sensation,” you greet and he gives you a lazy smile.
“hi.”
“you going to go for lunch?”
“yeah. have you had something to eat yet or do you wanna grab a bite together?”
“i brought cup noodles but i don’t mind. don’t you want to go with your friends?”
“you’re better.”
“please shut up, that’s so cringe,” you murmur with an undeniable grin, one that causes his gaze to soften as well. “let’s get lunch together then.”
“let me get dressed,” the athlete says, about to run off when you abruptly stop him, causing him to turn around suddenly, his hair whipping around with his actions. “what’s up?”
beckoning him over, he returns to where he stood before and you take out a hair tie, one that you store in your pockets all the time just in case. “does your hair not bother you when you practise?” you silently ask for permission, hand merely hovering near his head until you realise that he was okay with the contact. “it’s getting all in your face, even i was annoyed when watching you.”
gently, you run your hands through his hair and despite the sweat on his forehead, it’s still soft and fluffy. goodness you could play with it forever.
then, you gather nagi’s front bangs, bringing them together to resemble a unicorn horn, tying it with your hairband. when you part from your work, you’re pleasantly surprised that it holds but you suppress a giggle because of how ridiculous he looks, paired with that dazed look in his eyes, you never thought you’d see nagi like this.
when you reach to tug your hairband out of his hair, he waves you off, taking the updo out himself.
“can i keep the hairband?” he pleads and you quirk an eyebrow.
“it’s just a hairband,” you say.
“so you won’t miss it right?”
“no, i won’t-”
“-okay, epic,” he mumbles before putting the hair tie around his wrist and a part of you swells with pride at the sight; a feeling that you try to shove down with little success. “can i get changed now?”
“yes, go.”
whilst you watch the white-haired disappear from your vision, you can’t help but wonder how you got yourself into this situation with such a weirdo. still, you adore said weirdo and this was no one’s fault but your own.
nagi wears the hair tie for the remainder of the day.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
roughly two months or so pass by and the days become a blur, especially since training is becoming more rigorous for the team due to the preparations for their spring soccer season. your schedule is piled day by day with athletes coming for their regular checkups and consultations, leaving you drained as soon as the work day is over.
nagi, your loving ‘partner’ notices this because he always likes to stick around after hours and bother you for a massage. he always insists that you do it because it’s like an immediate ‘full heal’ but you just think that he’s too lazy to book a professional masseuse and that you’re the next best thing.
whatever. at least he’s cute.
“i hardly see you nowadays,” he mutters, voice muffled by the leather bed of your workspace.
you gather a little more lotion on your hands, spreading it along his calves before pressing your thumbs into his muscles, trying to identify where any tight spots might be. “i’m sorry, i don’t have much time nowadays. appointments with you guys go all the way til six, and i don’t get home until 6:30. then i’m practically out like a light.”
he hums in torment and in consideration, tensing his shoulders a little as a natural response to the pain in his legs. “well, tomorrow’s a saturday. can i take you out?”
“i don’t know, some athletes may sporadically come and bother me to get a massage so i’ll let you know if anything comes up.”
“be serious.”
“i am free tomorrow.”
“sick. keep it that way.”
“even if athletes bother me for a much-needed massage in order to perform at their best?”
he huffs something in response before flopping his face back down on the leather bed, the (seemingly invincible) knots in his calves taking too much of your attention for you to think too hard about tomorrow’s date with nagi.
he’s still wearing your hair tie around his wrist.
true to his word, nagi picks you up the next day at 3pm for your date since he insisted that was the earliest he would be ready by (meaning, it’s the earliest he can wake up). when you meet him, you’re a little stunned by the amount of disguises he’s wearing. sunglasses, beanie, and a face mask, you’re not sure whether he’s going to attract more attention or blend in.
also, when you’re 6’3 it’s hard to avoid eyes.
“hey, i’m supposed to meet someone called nagi, he’s got white hair, grey eyes, 190 cm, have you seen him?” you ask as soon as you approach the soccer player. he sighs through his mask when you erupt into a fit of laughter. “i’m just kidding.”
nagi brings down his mask to sit below his chin. “your boyfriend is right here,” he corrects, voice demanding and authoritative, sending shivers down your spine.
“so he is,” you mumble, stepping closer to engulf him in a hug. he wraps his arms around you in return and you contentedly sigh when he pulls you into the comfortable, expensive material of his hoodie. “what’s with the disguise?”
“i don’t want anyone to ruin our day out so i’m wearing this.”
“ever so thoughtful aren’t you?”
when you take a step back, nagi’s careful to not let you stray too far which is indicated through the protective arm he keeps around your shoulders.
“should we get going?”
“yeah.”
the white-haired laces your hands with his, his grip gentle yet committed to keeping you near him as you stroll down the warming streets of tokyo.
“it’s finally spring,” nagi comments offhandedly, causing you shift your gaze towards him. you’re surprised that he was initiating conversation, majority of the time it was you doing the rambling and him partaking in the listening. “the cold weather was getting bothersome. hated going to practise all freezing, makes warmup so hard.”
“i like the cold weather,” you say. “it’s easier to dress for winter than it is for summer.”
“that is true.”
“do you like spring?”
“yeah, ‘s my favourite season.”
you didn’t think someone like nagi would bother too much with having a favourite season. “why’s that?”
“it’s a good season for napping and staying inside. i like that i don’t have to do much nor think about much.”
such a nagi response. you admire how stubborn he sticks to his ideals and general philosophy, it’s a comforting quality and aspect to have.
“plus it’s your birthday season,” you add.
he looks at you with a gentle smile before repeating: “it’s my birthday season.”
nagi takes you to a park where the cherry blossoms are in full bloom, its petals decorating the scenery and ground, creating a dainty, lovely carpet of pink and beauty. however, the main attraction of the date isn’t the scenery of the park but rather, the lake where several pedal boats float on the water; some occupied, some vacant.
the soccer player shows the attendant his purchased tickets, getting them scanned before you’re led to get on one of the boats.
“so… are you liking the date?” nagi asks when you’re out far enough from the dock so that no one can hear you. here, he takes off his mask, tucking it into his pocket.
“i am, i’ve been wanting to ride one of these boats for a long time but i’ve just never found the time,” you confess. “i’m glad that it’s with you. thanks, nagi.”
he looks away, an obvious pink tint appearing on his cheeks as he rubs his neck in embarrassment. “it’s okay, i s’pose.”
“you’re so cute,” you say whilst raising one hand to drag through his hair.
“stop,” he whines but not brushing you off or pulling away, instead, he leans into your touch.
a few minutes of silence pass by before nagi speaks up again, retreating back into his personal space as he fishes for something in his hoodie pocket. he pulls out a long velvet box, handing it over for you to take which you do with a little hesitation.
“i wanted to give you something to mark two months,” he tells you and you feel your heart drop.
“wait what? two months? i didn’t know we were celebrating that!” (because you spend too much time fretting over the day he’d tell you that he wants to break up, not needing this fake relationship anymore.) “i didn’t get you anything, i feel terrible now-”
“-it’s not a big deal, i just wanted to give you something.”
“nagi i can’t accept this, this is too good-”
“-i insist.”
“but i don’t have anything for you-”
in the blink of an eye his hands are clasped tightly around yours, his face incredibly close to yours that you’re stupefied into silence. “i. insist.”
you stare at him for another three seconds before relenting, opening the velvet box with the utmost care in fear that you might drop it in the water; a horrifying thought.
a gasp of delight slips out of your mouth when you see an emerald necklace beaming brightly in your face. it’s in the shape of a pendant, encrusted around a halo plate with gold surrounding it, and from the looks of it, it couldn’t have been cheap.
looking back up at him to express the disbelief you feel, you’re silenced by the gentle look in his eyes, one that shines with adoration and devotion.
“it’s beautiful,” you whisper, unable to talk much louder in fear that it’ll cause the emerald to shatter in your hand. “you shouldn’t have.”
“i wanted to because i really like you. stop worrying.”
you exhale deeply, a little flustered and caught off guard by how candid he was. this feels suspiciously real.
“where did you learn to be so romantic?” you quiz, using humour to narrow how awkward you felt.
“shoujos,” he answers shamelessly.
“ah.” makes sense as to why he makes you feel like you’re in one. “can you help me put the necklace on?”
the white-haired shines with glee, features brightening for a second. “y-yeah, of course.”
“thank you.”
when he grasps the jewellery in his hold you turn around to expose the back of your neck to him, practically holding your breath when you feel his warm fingers brush against your skin, his touch barely there yet still prominent enough to blaze trials of fire where he caresses.
“how do i look?” you ask, turning back around.
“beautiful,” he says, no louder than a whisper.
eventually the boat ride comes to an end and you return back to the dock. a lingering feeling of bliss and giddiness resonates in your chest, evident in the undeniable grin plastered on your face whilst you walk through the park; this time with a pretty gemstone adorning your neck.
“nagi, look!” you exclaim, gesturing over to a company-branded photo booth that had set itself up in the middle of the park. there were various people lining up for one and judging by the pleased squeals from groups of students, it would be a nice memory to keep for today. “should we take one?”
“sure,” he shrugs, letting you drag him to hop in the queue which was going much faster than you anticipated.
when it’s your turn, there’s hardly any time to discuss poses when the cameraman clicks the countdown button so unexpectedly. you reflexively hug nagi whilst smiling and he just gives a simple peace sign. he then stands behind you, wrapping his arms around you to place his head atop yours. finally, he bends down to kiss your cheek, rendering you completely mentally inable as you default a pose, not entirely too sure which one whilst you wait for the countdown and the camera flash.
“you guys are so cute!” the photographer exclaims, handing your photobooth strips already. even then you hadn’t regained your senses, relying on nagi to guide you with his hand on the small of your back.
glancing down at the photo strip, you’re stunned into speechlessness at the last photo. you can still remember the feeling of his lips on your cheek, specks of his warmth lingering on your skin whilst you continue trying to register what just happened.
you might explode or something.
“cute,” nagi mumbles whilst putting the photo strip into his wallet, pulling you in by the waist to stand closer to him, whispering in your ear. “i still have one place i want to take you.”
“do you?” you squeak, earning you a nod as he leads you through the park, coming to a stop when you enter a somewhat secluded section that had a sign labelled ‘private picnic rooms’ with various price ranges according to the number of people.
once again, he claims to have a reservation and you’re led by an attendant towards a specific area that had a table scattered with plates of snacks and various decorations. the vibe of the room was incredible with tatami mats, a floor to ceiling glass window that outlook the cherry blossoms, and if you tried hard enough, you could hear a stream running.
“you… really outdid yourself,” you murmur, wandering over to one side of the table, expecting him to sit on the other. instead, he takes the spot right beside you.
you’re not too sure if this layout is how the establishment intended it to be but it is now.
“so you like it?”
“i do. i love everything you’ve done today, you’re too good for me.”
“not true,” he grumbles, too quiet for you to address it further but loud enough for you to hear.
your relationship doesn’t make any sense to you. why is nagi trying so hard to impress you when this relationship was just for beneficial gain? what does he get from booking a pedal boat ride, buying you a (clearly expensive) emerald necklace, then taking you to have a private picnic?
picking up a piece of halved mochi with the provided fork, you give the first bite to nagi who is more than happy to oblige, chewing on it with a satisfied expression.
he’s so cute, you could pinch him.
your eyes then flit over to the decorations on the table, reaching over to the branch of cherry blossoms in a vase before you could think, ripping off one of the sticks with the bloomed flower and putting it in nagi’s hair and behind his ears. his adorableness just tripled.
“aww you look really cute with pink!”
“ya think so?”
“yeah! you’re so pretty nagi,” you reach over to fiddle with the flower, not registering how close you’d gotten to him until you feel his breath fan across your face.
then you comprehend it, frozen in place for a second as you study nagi’s beauty from an angle you hadn’t before. how his snowy hair fanned perfectly over his forehead, the way the light bounced in the reflection of his eyes, and the imperfections that littered across his skin all contributed towards making the pretty being that was nagi seishiro.
he leans in. you freak out, instinctively turning your head.
your breath gets caught in your throat when you feel nagi’s lips brush against the corners of your mouth, lingering there for a moment before parting and the look of hurt that flashes across his face hurts your soul.
did you do the right thing? you thought you did- you know nagi isn’t into you the way you are into him. this relationship was made for media attraction, for him to gain more seconds of fame, so why does he keep acting like you two are real? why does he keep protecting your identity from the internet, why did he wear a disguise when meeting you when he would have wanted to boast that he was taken, why does he want to kiss you?
why does he look so hurt when he didn’t?
this was all so confusing.
tension lingers in the air for the rest of the date. you try to compensate for it by being a little more affectionate, giving in to your desires of openly loving him for the day. nagi’s satisfied.
you don’t notice how the cherry blossom fell from his ear.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
you won’t find answers to your questions for a long time. in fact, the amount of questions you had quadrupled one night when you had spent the day at nagi’s apartment after work one day to watch a tv show that was on his ‘to-watch’ list.
“stay the night?” asks nagi, resting his head on your shoulder to give you his best puppy-dog eyes. you will yourself to not look at him by keeping your gaze firm on the television screen.
“oh this episode sounds good. maybe we can watch this then i’ll get going,” you mutter whilst fiddling with the remote, dutifully ignoring his pleads and the way he tugs at you; something that does not resonate well with him.
“oi. don’t ignore me.”
with a rough exhale, you finally turn towards him. “i can’t.”
“why not? we don’t have work tomorrow.”
“i know but i just feel bad to bother you and take up your space.”
“you’re not botherin’ me. there’s so much space here, it feels empty without you.”
“nagi-”
“-won’t you call me seishiro? or something more romantic?”
the relationship shifts with his very words and you feel the genuine desperation that bleeds from nagi through his tone. when you look him in the eye, part of you shines with hope that maybe your relationship was real and not bred for media benefit.
in this moment of weakness, you let the top of your walls crumble.
“okay, seishiro.”
he beams. a smile so pure that you shatter like glass in his hands. “yay.”
you then find yourself underneath him as he lays his entire body weight over you, pressing you into the comfortable cushions of his couch as his hands delicately run up and down your waist. paralysed with confusion at the amount of love he pours into his touch, you keep forgetting that the higher you climb, the harder the inevitable fall will be.
“stay the night, please?”
how could you say no when he was asking so nicely? “okay, seishiro.”
“yay.”
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
“hey seishiro, are you ready?” you ask, fiddling with your rings as you round the corner of your living room where your oversized boyfriend is lounging across the couch whilst you got ready (boyfriend still feels weird to say even if he has zero problems with addressing himself by that title).
“yeah. let’s go-” he grumbles, cutting himself off when he glances over at you, eyes widening. “-whoa.”
heat rushes to your cheeks whilst nagi continues to shamelessly marvel at you, slowly standing up to cross the distance between you, his hands naturally hovering to hold your hips when he’s close enough. his gaze lingers even longer on the emerald necklace that sits between your collarbones. “like what you see?”
he stays silent for a second, leaving you to anticipate his answer. “we don’t have to go to isagi’s,” he mumbles. “how do we feel about staying in?”
“don’t. your best friend is hosting this party, can’t you at least show up for him?”
the white-haired sulks. “but you look so good. why should i celebrate that shortie instead of you?”
you push his face away, jokingly fed up with your boyfriend’s lazy attitude. “isagi is also my friend and i want to celebrate with him, just for an hour or two and then we can leave. deal?”
“fine.”
twenty minutes later, you arrive at isagi’s place where a good amount of his closest friends had gathered, showing up far earlier than you and nagi did.
truthfully, you were looking forward to isagi’s party since he was not throwing a massive rave where everyone was invited- those always ended up to be more unfortunate than fun in your opinion, and that wouldn’t exactly cater to his shy and sensible character. tonight was a gathering for his friends to hangout and celebrate. some you recognise from the team, some of them must be from high school or elsewhere.
bachira’s cheery face is the first one you see upon arrival, his smile wide as he practically bounces off the walls in excitement and you already begin to wonder just how many desserts and sweets he’s had upon arrival.
“hey it’s the couple of the century!” he exclaims with a wink. nagi keens at bachira’s compliment, all proud and boastful as his hand creeps up to hold your hip protectively. “lookin’ good as always!”
“yo, where’s isagi?” the white haired questions.
“around, i’ll take you to him c’mon!”
the two soccer players are off before you can even count to three, nagi and bachira disappearing into the crowd as the hyperactive boy drags your 190 cm of a boyfriend through the crowd. well, at least he took the gift you both bought with him, but now you feel a little alone and very awkward.
walking around the hallways of isagi’s, you feel a little out of place since most of them seemed to be high school friends. it’s not until you reached the kitchen that you sigh in relief, met with the familiar, friendly faces of chigiri and reo who see you first.
“hey!” the red-haired calls out, waving at you as you walk over to them. “it’s good to see you, y/n, how are you?”
“hey chigiri, hey reo, i’m good! i just arrived but this seems like a cool gathering. isagi’s really outdone himself,” you greet.
“yeah he did. good way to unwind before the soccer season gets too crazy,” reo chips in. “nice outfit by the way, you served!”
“oh shut up, you look amazing yourself. you too chigiri.”
“so… where’s nagi?” the purple-haired asks, checking his phone to see if he had received any texts from his best friend. “didn’t he come with you?”
“yeah but bachira dragged him to go talk to isagi as soon as i arrived. you know how he is.”
after a few more minutes of talking with the two, you finally pause the conversation out of concern about nagi’s whereabouts might be. you thought he’d come and find you after a while but guess you’ll search for him first.
informing the pair first before breaking away, you wander into the rooms where bachira pulled nagi into, blindly hoping that they’ll be in there. to your chagrin, there were only a few unfamiliar faces spread along the couches, discussing something with a drink in their hand. you ignore the sight of otoya and one of isagi’s friends sitting too close for comfort.
when you walk into the next room, you stop in your tracks at the sight in front of you: nagi leaning against the wall with a stranger who clearly has no distinction of personal space, their hand resting on his chest. your heart plunges the bottom of your stomach as distraught settles within you because of the scene unfolding in front of you, chest churning with a distant ache that you can’t put your finger on.
then he looks over at you.
the instinct to turn around and run overpowers any rational judgement, especially when a flurry of emotions begin to well up inside you, causing you to sink further and further in an ocean of doubt and fear.
you had no right to be jealous, not over nagi because you’re just his ‘pseudo-partner’, he’s not really yours and it’s moment like these that truly humble you into remembering. you’re just his ‘pseudo-partner’, you’re just his ‘pseudo-partner’, you’re just his-
“-where are you going?” comes an indifferent voice from behind you. all anxiety floods out of you like a broken dam. a warm, large hand tugs on your wrist and even if he had not spoke, you’d know from touch alone that it was nagi behind you. the multitude of times that he’s spent holding you, intertwining his hand with yours, and cherishing you has forced you to brand him into your memory.
you are his. even if it is not mutual, you would be his until he stomps the fire out.
“i-i thought i was interrupting something,” you stammer, looking into at nagi’s doe eyes.
“you didn’t. actually, you made it better by coming,” he says before wrapping his arms around your torso. “that person wouldn’t leave me alone, such a pain. tried to say i was taken too, so glad you came.”
you return the hug, trusting his words. “glad i came too.”
nagi pulls you out of the water.
“can we leave yet? i don’t wanna be here anymore.”
“just a little longer. i haven’t even seen isagi yet. plus, we should dance.”
he gives you a quick look up and down before nodding in agreement. you smack his shoulder.
you manage to locate isagi rather quickly. he was near the food bar where refreshments and various desserts and snacks laid so after greeting him, wishing him ‘happy birthday’, and chatting with him for approximately five minutes before nagi started getting bitchy, you’re pulled into the dance floor by the white-haired. he said that they were playing a good song when you asked why he was being so impatient.
with a laugh, you give in.
nagi doesn’t really know how to dance but you can’t help but be a little entertained, deciding to end his awkwardness when you grab his hands and lead him through some moves, singing along to the song with each other. it ends with your arms around his neck and his around your waist (again) when a slower song plays.
hiding your face in his chest, you breathe in the subtle aroma of his cologne that you urged him to put on earlier. when he gently prompts you to look up at him with a hand gently pulling on your hair, your breath gets caught in your throat at the close proximity as nagi stares at your lips, glancing up to meet your eyes again before leaning in.
this time you don’t feel as cruel, bracing yourself for the first sip of water after crossing the desert, for the final puzzle piece clicking into place, for the feeling of his lips slotting against yours; for the feeling of completion.
instantly you relax at the sensation, melting into his embrace as you hold onto him a little tighter, wanting more. you want to take as much of him as he’ll allow and even then, you’ll cherish every last part.
you want him the same way the ocean longs for the moon.
parting from him makes you feel empty. the lidded look he gives you is full of temptation and… love?
snapping out of your reverie, you step away from him, using his dazed state to create some distance between the two of you as you come to your senses. senses that scream at you for possibly ruining… this.
you hate that you keep running away from him, leaving him in the dust of the mess that are your feelings. it’s immature, irrational, and downright childish, really it is, but how else can you stop the way you’re about to burst at the seams? how can you stop yourself from devoting yourself fully to nagi seishiro if you don’t forcefully screw the lid over your emotions?
for the second time tonight, the white-haired chases after you because there was never another option. he despises being away from you and despises it even more when it’s him you’re running away from, wanting nothing more than to be by your side at all times.
for the second time tonight, he grabs your wrist but now, he leads you through isagi’s house, weaving through a series of well-kept and simply decorated rooms to finally arrive at a balcony. one that was untouched by the party goers.
“why do you keep doing this?” he asks, pleading for an answer as desperation laces his voice and eyes. “why do you keep running away?”
you’re stunned. he’s hurt by your carelessness and the way you constantly recoil from him as if he was electric, his powerful figure slouching, all his quiet confidence and stubbornness seeping out of him, running to pool at your feet.
“am i doing something wrong? i thought you liked me.”
“i-i’m confused,” you stammer stupidly.
he grows even more perplexed. “you’re confused? i’m even more confused! one second i think you like me then the next, you’re trying to avoid me. why do you keep doing this? i really really like you, y/n. but it doesn’t feel like you like me at all sometimes.”
“no!” you blurt out. “it’s not like that! i do like you, a lot, in fact i might even… love you? it’s just…”
as you try to recap the timeline of your relationship in the past few months, you find yourself at a loss for words as you truly realise the multitude of your stupidity. you might slap yourself in the face.
this entire time, nagi has liked you- genuinely liked you for who you are yet you’ve been denying the love he has been trying to share with you since you internalised it all to be a sham. that someone like nagi seishiro couldn’t want you in the same way you wanted him. you’ve been hurting him this entire time and you don’t know how to begin explaining why.
well… no other option than with one word at a time.
you go to grab both his hands, inhaling. “i didn’t think we got together based on genuine feelings.”
he recoils, eyebrows and nose scrunching.
“i thought you were using me to- i don’t know, trend on the internet by teasing everyone with some sort of secret relationship which sounds so stupid, i know, but i just couldn’t believe that you would want me for me,” you ramble, only stopping to breathe. “these few months have been amazing but i lowkey thought you were going to break up with me and say something like ‘surprise! i’ve never liked you’ before leaving me. i don’t deserve someone like you and-”
“what?”
you shut up.
“you thought you don’t deserve me? that’s the biggest lie i’ve ever heard. you’re perfect. i was the one that got lucky.”
“lucky? you? really?”
“yeah,” he breathes. “you’re like a gift sent by fate.”
that renders you speechless for a little. there’s more to say, you know there is because of the pregnant silence that lingers around the two of you for a little but maybe that’s for another time.
are you dreaming? this feels surreal. maybe you’ll start floating too.
“also, why would i want to trend for any other reason but soccer?”
“i don’t know! you asked me out really abruptly- i’ve never been asked out like that before! talk about confusing. and the paparazzi was waiting for us after too like, what was i supposed to think!”
“i see.”
“yeah.”
more silence.
“so… you love me?” nagi asks and you groan, removing your hands from his to cover your face from embarrassment.
“i guess i do,” you grumble.
“hey, don’t hide from me,” the white-haired says before grabbing your wrists to lower them from your face. “i love you too.”
“really?”
“yeah.”
“that’s cool.”
“it is.”
you do both of you a favour by kissing him fervently.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
“sei, shouldn’t you be getting ready for the match or whatever it is you athletes do?” you ask when nagi’s mop of white hair peaks up from behind the door to your physio office.
he steps out from behind the doorframe, crossing the distance to get to you. he’s sporting his blue lock tracksuit with his hands dug into his pocket and you’re a little envious of how comfortable he looks. “i was until i realised you weren’t there. i was waiting for you to show up.”
“well i don’t really have to be there early. i just get there around 20 or so minutes earlier.”
“i see.”
“why, did you want me there or something?” you ask with a cheeky eyebrow raise, poking him in his sides causing him to recoil a little from your touch.
“why else would i walk all this way?”
“a stunning 50 metres- i’m so sorry for your perilous journey,” you comment, placing a kiss on his cheek before walking away from him to set up your box of medical supplies including kinesio tapes, bandages, and cold spray. he slumps down on the waiting couch near the entrance.
your role as blue lock’s official therapist meant that you had to be on standby for the team at all time during official matches. even though you aren’t their nurse, you still bring first aid things like ice packs to minimise the amount of time spent travelling between offices, especially if that distance is not needed.
after scanning the box for the last time and mentally ticking your checklist of materials required to bring, you pat your leg in satisfaction before standing up. “i can go to the field now. there’s probably tape changes that i need to do.”
nagi lazily grins, searching for your hand to help pull himself up. “yay.”
“you need to be warming up while we’re at it.”
“aw. okay.”
the walk back to the field is painless enough with nagi holding onto your hand for dear life whilst carrying your box of supplies for you. for someone who is about to compete in less than an hour, he is surprisingly calm, hardly different from his passive, pacifistic self. should you be nervous on his behalf?
stepping in to the field, you’re overwhelmed by the enormousness of blue lock’s home stadium, the lights shining down on you so brightly that you need a moment to recollect yourself. to think that all these empty seats will be filled with various people scares you mindless; even vacant it was still overwhelming.
“y/n!” isagi’s voice breaks you out of your reverie and he jogs over to you with that friendly smile of his. “what’s up?”
“hey isagi, sei dragged me out of my office,” you grumble before turning around to the white-haired who places your supplies on the ground, instructing him to: “go continue warming up.”
he grumbles something incoherent, leaning in to place a kiss on your forehead before running off, leaving you a little flustered as the dark-haired player waits patiently to talk to you.
“so what’s up?”
“i just needed my ankle to be retaped, is that okay?”
“that is my job so come over,” you say, beckoning isagi to one of the benches nearby where you decide to station yourself for the time being.
whilst you’re unrolling the adhesive, he awkwardly sits there with his shoe and sock off, exposing his joint where he already you tape it for him.
“do you want pink or blue tape?” you ask, holding up the two options.
“pink.”
the background noises of athletes shouting and kicking soccer balls fill the silence whilst you cut up the length needed to tape isagi’s ankle.
“how are you and nagi?” he asks.
“we’re good,” you respond, mentally reminding yourself to give isagi a present in exchange for his birthday being the sole reason why your relationship strengthened. “both been busy cause of the season but it’s fine.”
“that’s okay, you’re making it work!” he reassures, “well, nagi is really happy.”
“is he now?” you ask, looking intently at your hands as they worked around isagi’s ankle, hiding your giddy expression from the soccer player. the effect nagi has on you will never disappear.
“yeah! always talks about you to us.”
“does he?”
“of course, why wouldn’t he? swears you’re the best thing to have happened to him in a long time or whatever.”
your heart warms uncontrollably. nagi seishiro was going to be your downfall.
finishing up on isagi’s ankle, he tests it out quickly before thanking you and running off again to blend in with his teammates again. ‘don’t work too hard!’ you yell out after him.
after retaping chigiri’s knee, commanding karasu to do his recommended exercises, and other various checkups, the boys are ushered back into the stadium so the audience could begin filing in. before nagi went in, he runs over to you, bundling you in his arms despite the various exclaims of ‘hurry up!’ yelled at your white-haired partner.
“gotta go,” he says breathily.
“wait, shouldn’t you take this off?” you ask, gesturing to your hair tie which sat snugly at his wrist.
“do i have to?”
“you can always rewear it after the match sei, it’s not a big deal.”
“fine. i’ll see you soon then.”
you give him a smile of reassurance, hugging him back. “go. i’ll be watching, my superstar.”
his eyes shine. “cheer for me, won’t you?”
“of course i will. i’m your lucky charm,” you tease but he takes your statement quite literally, grinning at what you say which only illuminates the cheery look on his face.
“can my lucky charm give me a kiss?”
cupping his face, you quickly place a peck on his nose before lightly pushing him away. you know the kiss is not good enough to satiate his hunger but perhaps that’s just what you want from him, to try hard for a better reward. and in this case, by trying harder, he would bring home the trophy.
“go line up!” you command.
nagi grumbles something before stepping away, “i’ll score for you.”
he dashes towards the stadium entrance, leaving you in a lovesick daze as you watch him retreat. someone clears their throat behind you and you remember where you are, sitting down to preserve some professionalism.
sitting in the medics corner was scary, especially as you watch every seat getting gradually filled with an onslaught of different people, but all you need to do for the 90 minutes is watch and be attentive to the game and the health of the players. an easy job for the amount of pay you get.
when the teams walks out into the field, everyone in the stands erupt into a roar, waving their various flags and colours. despite the chaos, nagi looks over at you and you blow him a kiss, unsure of whether or not he could actually see you.
as everything settles down, the match finally begins, starting off with a bang. from time to time you talk with the two other blue lock medics and spend the other moments admiring your boyfriend in his athletic glory.
it’s not until almost halftime that something disastrous happens. when itoshi rin collides face-first into another player, toppling over on the field on top of each other, the crowd erupts into a series of gasps and concerned noises. as the referee’s whistle is called, you three official blue lock staff scramble to the middle of the field where a crowd was gathering around the two, trying to help their soccer players but stepping out of the way when you approach.
“where are you?” one medic begins asking.
“the stadium. we’re in the middle of a match,” comes rin’s gruff tone.
“you are?”
“itoshi rin.”
“how many fingers am i holding up?”
“four.”
“what hurts?”
“my fucking face,” rin snarkily replies, trying to stand up but not making it past his knees as he stumbles a little, holding on to his nose. “shit.”
taking his hand away, there are droplets of red coating his skin and you snake yourself under his arm in order to assist with helping him to the medic’s area, another nurse doing the same. hopefully it’s not serious and he won’t need be to sent to hospital, only benched by ego. which, he was.
in your panic, you don’t register any of the commotion happening within the players themselves whereas nagi, on the other hand, hears it all clearly. how a player on the team he was playing against says something like ‘look at that cutie. reckon i could cuff ‘em?’ where his friend replies with a ‘yeah dude. seems like a babe to be honest, workin’ as a nurse and shit’, geturing to you.
nagi has never felt such an overwhelming urge to punch someone, to jump the two players and tear them apart with the fury he feels accumulating in his insides.
the whistle to notify that the game was continuing disrupts nagi’s train of thought. he goes back into position but not without snaring at the opposition.
blue lock seems to be doing fine without their number one player for the remainder of the game; in fact, nagi is practically dominating the whole field as he shoots, earning goals left and right for blue lock. he’s moving with unmatched determination; a blazing kind that you’ve never seen from him despite having seen countless of his games. you wonder what happened to him since rin got injured, where did the calm, unbothered nagi go? why are you kind of scared of your boyfriend right now?
maybe your good luck kiss worked in giving him the boost you predicted.
however, you never could have predicted the huge turnaround that your life would take when nagi’s jealousy gets too ahead of itself. when his urge to show the world whose you are outspeaks his rationality, too caught up in the torments of untamed jealousy. he’s never felt this way before; a carnal desire so inherent that it makes him feel bare.
only you could do this to him.
and only you could fix the ugly monster inside him
when blue lock scores the goal needed to take the trophy home, the stadium is deafening, so loud that you need to cover your ears from the unrestrained passion of fans and watchers alike, the buzz of excitement unmatched.
nagi is awarded man of the match, taking home a shiny trophy in recognition of his athleticism and remarkable talents. yet the first thing he does when taking his prize is not rush over to his teammates and… do whatever it is that men do, but to run over to where you reside, a possessive and dark look in his eyes. it sends shivers down your spine.
he sweeps you into his arms, winding you so close that you can feel the body heat radiating from him, even through the fabric of his jersey. the trophy presses against your back.
“can i kiss you?” nagi questions although it sounds more like a demand, especially with that breathy voice due to how much he’s been running around.
short circuiting for a moment, you reply: “but everyone’s watching.”
“let them.”
you’re well aware of the multitude of cameras that may be pointed at you and nagi. if you act stupidly, it will appear on the internet and who knows what repercussions it might bring, are you ready to be thrown into a life of chaos, joining alongside your boyfriend?
the answer is obvious when you take the initiative of kissing him, allowing him to devour you whole: his first act of establishing just exactly who you were to the entire world.
you adore how scandalous this feels.
his second act comes mere minutes later at the exit where paparazzi and media were waiting patiently behind barriers for their star players. this time, instead of leaving alone or with his teammates, there’s an unidentified figure accompanying him, hugged close to his side and proudly wearing his jersey. the very one that boasts ‘NAGI’ along the back. everything descends into chaos.
an immense feeling of deja vu encompasses you when you recall the day nagi asked you out and the overwhelming lineup of paparazzi and photographers that waited for him outside. it’s different now. you feel confident in your place beside nagi, looking perfect to him in his clothes- as if you were meant to be his.
nagi walks in front of you to use his stature to protect from the greedy eyes of the internet whilst you use your hands to cover your face as best as possible, all to ensure your privacy from those who are going to eat these photos up when they see them.
and- well, if everyone is going to see them then why not send a little message whilst nagi’s here?
the kiss nagi sneaks on your neck is entirely proprietorial, a clear sign of affection for the whole world to see as he eyes the cameras with a deadly look in his eyes.
“mine,” he mutters in your ear, sending one last glare over his shoulder before disappearing from their nosiness and intruding flashes.
the cameras can see your hair tie that slips up when his sleeves are tugged too short.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
your notifications are rampant the next morning, mostly because of friends, and ‘#nagi seishiro’ has taken the internet by storm once again.
this feeling of anxiety settling in your stomach will never go away whenever you check social media to see if any of your information has been leaked and by whatever miracle, you’re absolutely relieved to see that nothing drastic has been revealed.
speaking of boyfriend, nagi stirs from where he lays beside you, stretching for a moment before patting the bed in search for your warmth.
shutting off your phone and putting it down, you watch him try to locate you, unable to stop the smile from stretching at the corner of your lips. he’s adorable. even more so when he has to open one eye because his instincts were failing him.
“oh. why are you awake?” he asks groggily, still adjusting to consciousness. nagi tries to sit up to rest on his elbows only to fail miserably and fall face-first into his lush pillow.
“body clock,” you say. you’ll talk about yesterday later. right now, it was just you and him and the soft glow of the sun saying good morning.
“turn it off and go back to sleep.”
“fine.”
“c’mere,” nagi beckons you over weakly, hands reaching for your figure but falling short due to the enormous size of his bed.
it’s not like nagi to splurge on things but it is like him to splurge on getting the most comfortable bed ever, so when he demands you to fall back asleep, how could you say no when it feels like napping on a cloud? and with your adorable boyfriend? some things in life come too easy.
shuffling back towards him, he’s quick to throw an arm and a leg around you, trapping you in.
“my body hurts,” whines nagi. “so much.”
“what do you want me to do about that?”
“massage later, please?”
“is that all i am to you?” you question teasingly whilst rubbing hearts into his skin.
“maybe,” he sings.
astounded, you give him your best look of betrayal. “we’re breaking up.”
“no, don’t do that,” nagi pleads, hugging you closer as if you were going to get up from his vice grip in the first place. “don’t be mean.”
“oh sure because i’m the mean one,” you joke as he burrows his head into your neck. instinctively, your hands card through his hair, extra soft from washing it last night. after a moment of silence, you speak up. “you’re trending again because of me so just remember that what i said about our fame-grabbing relationship was true.”
“i didn’t mean for that to happen. i’m just too good,” he takes his head out of your neck, doe eyes looking up at you with heart wrenching awe. “and i love you too much to hide it.”
you pat his cheek, unable to stop a wide, dreamy smile from appearing on your face. “go back to sleep.”
“‘k. goodnight.” the second nagi’s head hits his pillow, he’s out like a light.
it’s a little surreal to be wrapped in his embrace like this, to be able to gaze at his features so closely and unabashedly whilst his arms extend to mould you into him. even being as close as humanly possible isn’t enough for nagi who has an unlimited desire for more, at all times.
if it’s you he wants, then you’ll happily grant it.
the last thing you see before falling into a deep slumber is a hair tie that lies on his bedside table.
#favourite#NOT AMAZUNG?!?! BRI THIS IS SO HIGH QUALITY TIER ITS THAT ONE FANFIC I WOULD SELL MY ORGANS FOR TO MARRY#i need it printed in my brain#bro....#this is so hot pls make out with me/hj#LITERALLY OMFHAJSHSJHiahdkx#Ring size??? hello????#im down on my knees whatshs#kinikilig na ako sobra hindi na to nakakatawa wudhajhsjshsiwhdjs#bllk
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I'll be your mirror, reflect what you are, in case you don't know
(I'll Be Your Mirror by Nico and The Velvet Underground)
#sat in a graphic printing class with the opportunity to make another linocut and thought to myself 'i NEED to make a trigun piece'#and thus: vashwood to the song I'll Be Your Mirror. because music is my biggest inspiration and this was all my brain had in it that day#i found this song through trigun fanart but i don't remember the artists username... ill look it up later and reblog it again#this can technically stand as an unrelated piece but im still tagging it as trigun because that's the inspiration#also ignore how Vash's shoulder is. nonsensical. maybe he just has shoulder pads okay its too late to fix it now#he wears a shoulder pad with his undersuit in vol. 2 of trigun. imagine its that#i also imagined wolfwood in his trimax vol. 3 outfit with the sweater because. idk it has a warm energy and i was aiming for that#trigun#trigun fanart#vash the stampede#nicholas d. wolfwood#vashwood#my art#linocut#linoprint
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We are Infinity ♾️
#sk8 the infinity#sk8 fanart#reki kyan#langa hasegawa#sk8 renga#anime fanart#madsart#digital art#anime#fanart#print#coloring#they have taken over my brain#i will keep rewatching this until season 2 trailer comes out#i’m manifesting#I need it more than air#renga#renga fanart
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drawings ive done this week for a competition!! probably the most ambitious thing ive drawn in my new style but im very happy with them! :3
#mine#original#u hve no idea how small my brain is now#i will probably take th rest of the week off ough#i hope everyone is having a good time#im having a medium time but. i am getting there#ive ordered new prints!!!!! should be getting here next week i thnky#i need 2 order more business cards. my favourite thing to spend money on#its actually beginning to get sunny and warm so i will sit in the garden and read!!#im reading like. a murder mystery thing. its Just Okay#i read 'in memoriam' by alice somebody recently and OH BOY#i dont rlly know what im in the mood for book wise after this one....i might read the ninth rain ? ive heard good stuff abt it#part of me wants to read warrior cats bc i never read it as a kid but i think i'll b rlly autistic abt it so i am resisting currently#also i had porridge for breakfast this morning n put frozen blueberries in it n it made it purple....truly there is love in the world
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Hi guyss!! Havent been drawing much due to school and getting a cold (why wont it go away broo) anywayss ive been consuming time travel aus by the boatload and my favorite one BY FAR is Templeschool by @shadow-light19 !!! Please go check it out to see some peak twoie and steven brotherly love and cuteness!!!
#drawing your sillies in clothes that you own#i had these star print pj pants and i went like#steven would love these#and these pink floral pants#i cant get enough of twoie and steven being cute brothers#when steven is at his worst what he needs is his own steven to help him#bro got what he needed#with the added benefit of a new mom#priyanka collecting kids#she love the boys#i cannot stop adding copious tags#steven universe#look at these goobers#twoie universe#steven universe au#steven universe fanfic#please go read it#changed my brain chemistry#my art
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Day 268 - 277
WIP Below:
Total time: 11 Hours 25 Minutes
#Crit welcome. I'm considering putting this up on print on demand stuff jkenkjrhnr so I'd wanna make it a bit better#However I also have a super specific desire about it which goes against most good sense#So I may not listen... but still I will consider#A few edits I already wanna make so#But I do need to be done with this for now so I post at this stage kjnejrkhn#I was so inefficient with my time because I'm so scattered on trying to nail down the vibe from my brain#I can't visualize very well so...#the og vibe was definitely more along the lines of medieval map styles but somehow I got drawn into this#Day 268#16 Minutes#Day 269#50 Minutes#Day 270#51 Minutes#Day 271#1 Hour 35 Minutes#Day 272#35 Minutes#Day 273#58 Minutes#Day 274#30 Minutes#Day 275#1 Hour 6 Minutes#Day 276#3 Hours 7 Minutes#Day 277#1 Hour 37 Minutes#Blood#Isaiah
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tablecloth doodles
Daria, if i see this on pinterest without my permission i swear im selling my soul to the company and reporting your entire account, i already feel like killing a man tonight due to circunstances outside of my control, do not fucking test me
#ninjago#lego ninjago#artists on tumblr#ninjago morro#art#fanart#morro ninjago#ninjago fanart#silly#ninjago headcanons#ninjago possession#lego ninjago fanart#ninjago lego#i am so fucking done with life#i also have to smile and socialise tomorrow#i already promise#i wouldnt kms#but i would definitely kill YOU.#use your brains#on another note mom bought me cool prints#my friend made them and theyre so cool#i need to rearrange my art wall
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FUCK linkedin me and the homies all HATE linkedin. fuck job apps too actually
#rambles#can you tell where my brain is tonight#i have a job thing tomorrow and i still need to print out my resumes and write my cover letteres and ughhhh
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it's kind of funny, honestly, what sort of elaborate routine i have to go through to get my ipad baby brain to work with me.
for the past year and a half, ive written Permission Slip all on one document. This is suddenly no longer working, because my brain is a cat who has just decided they will no longer eat this brand of dry food
So what I've done NOW is:
One, smushed the next 3 chapters together into one entity temporarily, because One Is Less Than Three, Right? (sure, you room-temperature tapioca)
Two, i've made documents that are just the scenes with the character groups, ie one document is just Gregory and Moon's scenes, one is Freddy's, etc.
Which I'm also writing in Notepad
This isn't even like, sorting now, this is just arbitrary shuffling.
But hey it's working, so.... yay?
#WIP#i swear me @ me#the other factors of my writing (brain doesn't work before 8pm and need to be Alone) can't be adjusted#note that im able to write on my SAMS stuff as normal so#my recourse if Notepad didn't work was to do this old school#and print out what i have typed and then put it in a 3 ring binder with notebook paper#and get writin'#i GUESS what i've done is turn the scenes into oneshots to make them less pressure#cos im a oneshot author really
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i think i reached a new level of hyperfixation today. i'm not just burning custom tjmd dvds i'm printing custom labels and box art for those bad boys
#even at 480p it's gonna take two dual-layer discs for each season#i could probably squeeze it onto fewer if i didn't care about seasons and just put as many eps as would fit#but 1 season = 2 discs makes my brain happy#i need to call my library tomorrow and ask if they'll let me print the labels on their printer as i do not own one#tjmd#my posts
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you’re created with hands circling your wrists. there’s never any offense meant, you must understand - it’s simply that you’re a story, and someone’s come by this desperate need to learn how to let the hell go.
#the zone rpg#bakuspecial#:] hi. I think the game's in print now. so I can post this#heheheheh. total number came to six. very good number. very happy with the cards I did!!#gonna have to learn how to draw like this on a graphic tablet tho... no matter what the screen tablet was. bad. for my wrists#and my back too tbh. bowing over my lap to draw isnt great#but! my time with it has been beautiful. it was very good for my understanding art brain. its taught me a lot#I just need to. translate all that. to a different kinda kinetic scheme#well! that wont be a thing I think about too much for at least the next week. I am Out Of Da City Babeyy#okay. I go finish my drink. this place I am in slaps Ive already been swindled once#the coconut they sold me was good tho miles better than what we got out north. so I'll take it. for triple the price apparently#oh well! thats for the cab I refused to take. it all balances out#have a good day lads! check out the zone rpg! it owns! there's a free browser version if u wanna play!
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i missed lino carving so i busted out my supplies last night and made some hivemind block prints 🕺 theyre a little janky but i had fun
process pics under the cut ^___^
the original block (forgot to take a pic before any carving so this is mid-cut)
me making the two b&w ones. i somehow got these ones down just right but when i tried to print in my sketchbook i either overinked or underinked them. perplexing to be sure
me putting down the different color layers! i basically just put masking tape over the letters i didn't want to print, inked the block, then ripped the tape off and printed. once again i forgot to take a pic before i put orange down on the bottom right one so that one's yellow layer is lost to the ether
and just for fun here are the "duds" from the color layer prints. top one is fun but the aberration doesn't look as good as the other two's, and the bottom one is just incomprehensible. i over-inked the block and i KNEW i over-inked it but i just said fuck it and printed anyway LOL
#hivemind tv#graydon weaver#riley savage#my art#fanart#2023#finished#printmaking#linocut#bro i forgot this stuff is so fun. i need to come up with another multicolor print to do#the layering process is the exact kind of 'physical labor not on the computer' that i think my brain needs rn#someone in the discord also said theyd love if there was official merch in my style that would be so awesome. but it also makes me want to#get some oil-based ink and print this on a shirt for myself :-3#we will see LOL
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I am once again being haunted by "a paradox" holy fuck Olivia what the fuck is going on here what did you get yourself involved with and what did you do after it speak to me Olivia I can't keep living like this
#rat rambles#oni posting#the second half fills you with the horrors so you forget that the log opened up with that b111-1 bomb#for the record a paradox is one of my favorite lore logs of all of them because its the log that made me go Oh Shit and go reread all the#olivia logs I initially only skimmed through and begun the olivia brain takeover#the second part rewired my brain irreversably like its so fucked I love it#in particular one thing that makes me so fucking glad that the old olivia jackie logs were scrapped is that originally jackie was the one#who printing pod ified olivia to save her from the end of the world or smth#but the change to make it self inflicted? fucking amazing ten million times better and more interesting#especially because it implies she did it on purpose!#which opens up so many doors and I fucking Love it#because the teleportation technology was what she knew of as a method of doing this but either A shed have to have kept using teleporters#anyways and either just count on her not dying or counting On her dying#or shed have to know the link between it and the neural vaculators#which is very possible considering Stuff™ but does raise the question of how she used it#now the boring answer is that her brain map was already taken from the neural vaculator tests but god. that answer is boring.#the most interesting possibility to me personally is that she could have well. tinkered a bit with existing technology.#unlikely? maybe. fun to explore for my purposes? yep.#also I need the peace of knowing that jackie never got the satisfaction of knowing what happened with olivia's dissapearance#or if she did only after the fact#I need this to have been completely out of jackie's viewpoint at the top and I need it to fuck with her and shatter her worldview#I need to see the desperation and paranoia of a woman who is realizing that she has lost control over her technology#I need to see her try to cling onto her past ambitions and sense of control while falling apart at the seams#and I need olivia to have never thought jackie would give a shit until all else but her is dead and gone#do you see my vision do you see it do you see how much more fun it is if it was extremely deliberate instead of only lightly so
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I was going to also make a ref sheet for Gale for my first art fight, but now that I have that research exception I imagine I'm going to be spending pretty much all of my free time cramming 6 months of capstone into 6 weeks, so
So here, have what I had finished before, because there's currently no reason for me to finish any outfits v_v
#kirehn draws#I love them so much and I neglect them so much#not even technically finished because not enough scars BUT this is as finished as it'll be for the foreseeable future#ain't no way I'm actually drawing those tattoos you get them ONCE and then copy/paste/warped to fit#I have so much to read for this capstone#need four sources for the proposal and then FIFTEEN (15) for the literature review portion#my brain is going to melt#very tempted to print articles out at work to read and annotate in my downtime but I don't think they'll approve of me using the paper#you know it's probably fitting that Gale ended up as my Sidestep because they have the SHITTIEST luck#pk:ocs#pk:gale#fhr#other than tattoo flash designs I'm trying to do for a portfolio this may be the last thing I draw for a while :c
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I'm allowing myself to write in a print-cursive hybrid in Yiddish because that's also what I do in English/German and no one is reading my notes but me
#However I still write פ like G accidentally#langblr#Yiddish#If a teacher or pen pal ever has to decipher my handwriting I'm sorry#But I just can't deal with cursive#My brain doesn't accept it at all and I need to be able to take notes in class without having to think about every letter twice#So I'm using some of the cursive versions like ש and for other letters I use the print or a modified print version#Like ג which looks like a lamda in my handwriting lol
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The Kian Stone fandom is dying rb if you're a still true Stoner
#I am NOT drawing that leopard print by hand thank god for ibis paint patterns#also I'll probably start PD soon I just need to recover from Apotheosis and BITB first#and I NEED to get these drawing ideas out of my brain before I get seventeen more from watching one episode#anyway look at my WIP boy
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