#i need him dead /pos
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gelatinzz · 5 months ago
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whats your opinion on cheesy ii
he’s a very silly guy and one of my top 5 favorite ii characters, like, ever. he reminds me of weird al, he seems like the typa guy to LUUVV weird al and take inspiration off of him. /pos /pos!!! i literally love cheesy so much it’s insane, i have to keep it bottled up in a safe somewhere or ima go crazy!!! HHEELPMEE ‼️‼️i need him to be brought back forever, PLEAAAEEUUHHHHH!!!! 💔💔💔💔💔💔
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biggestcringefailure · 5 months ago
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rip book evan hansen you would’ve loved video essays
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alesodiabo666 · 4 months ago
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eeee eu preciso delee AGHORA :((((to enlouquecenokkkk
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cxrson · 1 month ago
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This stupid little shrimp has taken over my thoughts and mind (and Rodger but this is about Shrimpo rn)
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green-jealousy · 12 days ago
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In honor of me uninstalling a certain social (it was for my mental health, I was going literally insane) I will show you guys my Argalia handmade sticker lmao
Yes, it's actually a sticker. It's laminated, it works as it should... And it's on my laptop bshshsh
I love him dearly. HE'S ALWAYS IN MY HEAD, HE LIVES THERE RENT FREE SINCE THE VERY FIRST LOR TRAILER DROPPED YEARS AGO OKAY BYEE!!!
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youngdutchishot · 8 months ago
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I think you know the hyperfixation is a problem when you see the slightest bit of content of the character and turn into a rabie induced animal.
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zoppzoop · 7 months ago
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GAAHAHHHHH
#venting in the tags#maybe its just past darkness and the Bad Thoughts which i shouldnt listen to are clouding my brain too much#but i feel so fucking weird and inadequate over everything rn#im unable to work on drawings as i usually would have and its kinda plaguing everything which it should like yeah i love drawing but#i cant let just one aspect of me ruin everything. right? the fact that i havent been able to draw as well as i usually can should make me#feel sick to the stomach and unsure about everything i do but it happening and i hate it.#plus i got the ipad id saved up from the comms to buy and its fun and nice and all and maybe i just need more practice with it but i feel#like im not able to draw on it even more? and i spent the whole day trying to get used to it but its just not as good?? and then when i went#back to the no screen wacom i couldnt get a hang of it becuase idek its just not happening#and also the fucking art block wants me dead i swear i want to draw so bad and i have so many ideas but the moment i start anything its just#crumbles down into nothingness and i hate everything i do and gods fuck i want to cry but i can because there are people at home and#usually im a big 'crybaby' when im at home but i dont fucjing wanna be like that anymore like i can handly my shit myself im fine.#i dont need to just fuckinf cry abiut it becuase thats not gonna fox anything but also i feel like crying might just make me feel better#but then id have to hear shit from my family and i know theyre just teasing in a /pos way but i dont wanna fucking deal with that#plus my brother iust talking to him os annoying sometimes like he talks about things so condescendingly and fucking hel dude shut#the fuck up i dont need you telling me that my art is something people can 'just do' and the fact that i was able to get the ipad#'basically for free since i got that money from the little drawings i make' as if they dont fucking mean anything to you like#shut the fucking fuck up dude i worked hard on those and even though i dont like my own shit sometimes i still fucking work hard on those#fuck you you bitch#i think a lot of things are just piling up and i need to sleep#tomorrow will be a new dawn and a fresh start and maybe ill hate myself less#ps. note to anyone reading the tags#im fine i just needed to yell out and express my frustration a bit. some sleep will help surely.
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transingthoseformers · 1 year ago
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Tarn definitely still has his tank kibble but he's got his OG colors back and his face is mended if scared. Thinking maybe a bronze or coper colored patch though because the material adhered better.(pretty color combination)
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The Maltos recognize the Deceptacon badge but Damus is chill, and not acting hostile or threatening to them. His main concern was for Nickel. Mostly he was asking questions that boil down to him ascertaining the sparklings were in a safe home situation. To his minor surprise the answer was yes.
Damus knows Megatron's going to flip and try to find him it's why he gave the young ones his name. Damus wants to talk with Megatron and he's hiding out because he can't blend. Let Megatron find him. They can have out whatever they will have far from the younglings.
What's alarming Bee and Dot more than Damus initially is what happened to Prion. There is a little medic with big PTSD out there that needs help. Also this is intel about the wider universe boss-bot needs. Dot is torn between personally insulted and approving on general principle that Damus wanted to afirm her babies were safe. Alex is tentatively optimistic about the devlopemt.
Megatron is so suprised by Damus' description. No mask, no purple except for his badge, blue optics and biolights. He's describing Tarn and the fusion cannon is at home and the kids are well he was a tank but none of the rest is right. Plus he didn't transform at all just carried Nickel in his arms. Megatron is confused as well as panicking.
I had the stupid thought that in this AU! Pharma snaped and blew up Mestasanine by detanating all the Nucleon instead of the red rust virus and by chance Tarn and Nickel were off planet while the rest stayed behind. Maybe they were grounded or had temporarily "lost recreational activity privileges."
Yessss such a pretty color combo!!!
Awww yep yep, Damus cares🥰
Makes sense he's waiting for Meggsie to look for him rather than the opposite, there's a conversation between those two that needs to happen and Damus doesn't want it to be a surprise (in case it doesn't end well)
Makes sense that Dot and Bee are thinking that, especially considering Nickel's reaction and the information that the cybertronians outside of earth are definitely definitely not safe (and what if the black box consorta comes to earth??? They cannot have that.)
Sdgjjss yeah. She's proud of how she's raising the kids, and on one hand it's nice to know someone else is looking out for them too. But it also kinda stings that someone would be suspicious of her over it.
Megs is having so many big feeling about this, and what he knows of Tarn isn't matching up with what the kids are saying about Damus. Like, from what we can see, Megatron just is part of the Malto family in his own way. I feel like I'm entirely right on this. He has proven time and time again to be greatly protective of the kids, and part of him is afraid of what Damus could do to them. Confused and panicking indeed.
I can see WHY Pharma would make that decision in his scenario, it is a lot simpler than the Red Rust plan and he was rather desperate.
Hilarious then sad thought but Tarn had indeed lost planet privileges (that, or a factor of him being sick from something more mundane than the bleeding red plague) and Nickel was supervising, so they sent the others to do their usual deal which. Saying it went south is an understatement. I'm imagining that finding out what happened was an incredibly angsty moment, and I feel like it was another thing that made Damus reevaluate himself (after all, this was pretty much his fault because he pushed Pharma well past the breaking point for the sake of his dual addictions).
I can also see a situation where the Red Rust had progressed much faster than anticipated and the other members of the DJD caught it, after all wasn't Pharma's original plan for it to nail Tarn?? (After all it's centered around the T-cog. Not only does it prove deadly upon transforming, but it very probably makes the T-cog of the corpses entirely unusable. The Red Rust Plague very much was made with Tarn in mind.) And, I mean. There's no Ratchet and crew to have stopped it in canon (.... ... Unless, there was and it didn't work?? That would sure as hell explain why we don't see earthspark Ratchet in this au)
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snuurge · 3 months ago
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@vinegar-on-main
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HES SO WIDDLE SO TINEYYYY
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somnoir · 11 days ago
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Gotham's newest Crime Lord - Part 1
Prompt: Dan kills the joker and unintentionally becomes a crime lord
Dan didn't mean to become a Crime Lord. It wasn't his fault that the Joker was fragile and easily killable with one punch to the head. He didn't know that the seemingly immortal clown was easily killed once the impact practically snapped his neck. So yes, Dan didn't mean for this shit to happen. Not when all he wanted to do was go to college, make sure Danny and Elle weren't attracting trouble back in Gotham academy.
It wasn't his fault that the crazy bastard thought it was a good idea to nab his siblings and try to use them for ransom. It's not his fault that his first instinct was to introduce his first to that pennywise knock-off. It'd not his fault that this city was haunted by vengeful ghosts that wanted to tear that motherfucker to shreds.
They were supposed to lay low after the mess with their parents and their name changes.
But nooooo!
They had to have an absolute hatred for clowns and now he's somehow made himself a crime lord. Why the fuck were the Joker's goons so fucking stupid?! They either tried to kill Dan for killing their boss or they tried to fall under him and make him their new leader. It was like a fucking cult in his eyes. Seriously, what the absolute fuck was going on with this shitty city?
It's not like he could call Jazz and say "Hi sis! I killed a crazy clown and I'm now the boss of his weird goons. I also might end up on the local vigilante's hitlist."
Yeah, no. He's not doing that.
But this might not be so bad... Not really. Being their boss could be treated as a source of income if he utilized the Joker's shit properly. I mean, he couldn't always rely on the fruitloops money, not when Vlad could turn traitor and use the money against them. He needed to find a way to support his siblings, one way or another.
And Clockwork did say to get a hobby. If not mass genocide then he could resort to carefully planned crime. Yes. This could work. He'll make it fucking work for the sake of his siblings.
Besides, if he was a crime lord—in motherfucking Gotham—he doubts that the GIW will even try to fuck around in a city where a ghost controlled some part of the criminal underworld.
Oh... Oh, he was gonna fucking do this.
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(Clockwork watched as his most troublesome child shifts from world ender to crime lord. At least it was an upgrade from mass genocide.)
Nightwing didn't particularly know what to make of this mess. There were rumors of a new crime lord, of a new rogue.
One day, Joker's body was dropped into the harbor and found by the workers, all confused and scared as to why the Clown Prince of crime was dead in the water. It was humiliating in the Joker's standards, to be discarded like trash into the sea rather than have his body displayed for everyone to gawk at. The clown would have adored being glorified but whoever the hell killed him knew this and fucked the guy up bad.
His head snapped and his corpse tossed out like leftovers.
Jason had laughed, outright celebrated and Crime Alley was as festive as it ever was with the Red Hood blasting music through the streets and partying like there was no tomorrow. All of Gotham was celebrating, parading through the streets with pinatas that looked like the Joker. Harley would drop down from whatever roof she was on and swing her bat at the pinata, spilling red candy as everyone cheered and laughed. It was morbidly glorious.
But the festivities didn't erase the fact that someone had killed the Joker and knew what to do to disrespect him in the worst ways possible. It wasn't long until Joker's old lackeys were rallying to someone—a new boss. It wasn't odd for goons without bosses to move on to find different jobs, but for all of Joker's old minions to work for the same person? This was definitely the guy who killed the Joker.
No name, no appearance, nothing. Just quiet activity with organising his new goons to do strange errands. Stuff that didn't point them in the direction of criminal activity.
"You got anything?" Dick murmurs as Tim slouches over the batcomputer, watching as his younger brother sneered at the screen.
"Nothing. Absolutely nothing." He snaps, "All footage of this new rogue is immediately corrupted."
Babs hums, "And it's not like it's altered after it's been taken. The distortion happens live. They either have some tech on them or they're a meta who can avoid cameras." She adds, taking a leisure sip of the tea Alfred kindly offered them. "Whoever this is doesn't leave a trace aside from this shitty footage."
Tim groans, "I officially hate this guy!" He almost tosses his mug out of anger, shaking his head.
"Does Jason have any info on this one?"
And like the fucking menace he was, Jason pops up without another word. "He goes by Wraith." No one was startled, just sparing him a glance before nodding.
"That's it?"
"The goonions adore him." Jason shrugs, "Guy's been quick. Dealing with shit like Black Mask and other trafficking operations. Some of the kids he's saved wear clothes that have this specific symbol on them. It's a good tactic mind you. Tells people to fuck off and don't come anywhere near the kid or else he'll sic whatever bullshit he has in someone."
Dick narrowed his eyes, "Is it effective?"
"Hell yeah! One of the kids got kidnapped just last week. I went to save the poor thing but he walked out of that warehouse while the kidnappers were bleeding and sobbing." Jason once again grins, "Little Tommy threatened me if I try to arrest Wraith."
"So more anti-heri than villain. Good enough, at least." Dick sighed, shaking his head as he narrowed his eyes on the screen. More distorted footage.
"Thanks for the info, little wing."
"Just updatin' you guys. Heard some rumors that Harley's on the hunt for Wraith to thank him."
Great...
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It's been a solid two months since the death of the Joker. Batman and the rest of his birds were increasingly wary of the Wraith and his two new associates that went by Phantom and Specter. No footage on the three could ever be recovered, making them all assume this was the work of a meta.
Most of them weren't sure if this guy was a threat or not. Red Hood, on the other hand, had a fairly positive opinion on the guy who's been hanging traffickers by their legs and immediately staking their claim on the kid to keep them safe.
The new crime lord was slowly dismantling the criminal underworld and building it back up to their design.
"FUCKING HELL!" Dick glared at the screen again, "That's Wraith's doing, isn't it? No way did the Riddler blow up that building."
"Wraith's only been dealing with traffickers so far. Why would he do this?" Steph murmurs, staring at the recording of a building that had suddenly went off. Numerous were dead, some barely survived.
"That's the motherfucker's symbol." Dick pointed to the glowing green symbol that looked liked a fire with some obscure letter they couldn't really make out. (Was it a D or a P?)
"Okay... Why would Wraith blow up a building and kill everyone?" Jason immediately asked, seeming to be defensive of the man. "He doesn't just kill people, Dick."
"Even so..." Bruce grunts, clearly displeased with the bloodshed. All that death...
"We're going after him." Bruce announced, "I'm not putting of the Wraith investigation anymore."
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Dan stared at the pictures of the bodies, pudding out smoke without a cigarette in sight. His new minions—they preferred the term goons—were clearly apprehensive and continued to observe their new boss's expressions. This explosion had been his first act of pure and utter violence, a massacre of sorts.
He glances at Danny who melted out of the shadows, startling his goons.
"Can't say I'm not upset but I get why you did that shit." He begrudgingly admits, sitting across Dan. Phantom was a reluctant associate to his new organization of crime—ish.
"They weren't just trafficking kids, squirt. Pimping them, killing them and selling their organs, hosting matches and making meta kids fight to the fucking death." Dan clicked his tongue, "No redemption in that, Phantom."
"I get it, alright!" Danny snapped, "But the you've gotten the direct attention of the Bats now. They're gonna come for us, Wraith."
"Boss?" One of the goons—Dan remembers him as Jeremy Nelson. One guy just trying to support himself and his kid, trying to keep his sweet little daughter in school with as much money as he could get. Dan remembers giving the man a raise and a jacket with their family's symbol stitched into it—one for little Marigold.
"I'll deal with it. For now, you guys spread the word on that shit. I don't want anyone thinking I killed a bunch of kids." Dan growled, "My reputation can burn for all care, but like hell am I letting people think I hurt kids."
With Jeremy leading the other goons, he nodded and hurried out of the office to spread a word. The former Joker goons had taken a liking to their new boss, preferring his ways rather than their dead one.
"Jazz won't like this, y'know." Danny sighs, "I'm not gonna tell her. Never. But she'll find out, one way or another."
Dan frowns, "You think I don't know? It's Jazz, Danny."
"Yeah, yeah. I just didn't expect you to be like this. Crime Lord and everything."
Dan snorts, "I was the world ender, brat. This is mild compared to what I've done."
"Yeah, sure."
He shook his head, "You've got your own problems, brat. The Observants are still fussin' about you being king, your majesty."
An identical scowl looks back at Dan, and he's reminded that this kid is him. An alternate version of himself and yet they were brothers now. "I know. You killing the Joker fucked some stuff up. Apparently, the motherfucker was cursed to hell."
"Meaning?"
"He's got a lifetime of people in his shadow. Vengefu souls that want him dead." Danny huffs, "Had to deal with the paperwork cause everyone's wantin' a taste of him. I'm workin' on letting Walker release him so his victims can execute his soul."
"Cruel, little king."
"I'll give you his file. Bastard deserves to have his soul destroyed." Danny viciously grins. And once again, best reminded that this twerp is him. They were one and the same, different as well.
"Alright, alright. Fuck off now. We've still got some bats and birds to deal with." Dan immediately showed him away, noting Danny's eye roll.
"Better prepare a birdcage then."
Part 2 | Masterlist
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alesodiabo666 · 4 months ago
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shake canibalismo:333 shake shake shake shake shake shake💕💕💕💕💕SHAKE
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anyarose011 · 4 days ago
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Agape
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Pairing: Lucius x Reader
Summary: After the Roman Empire had fallen, birthing the Republic, you and Lucius had finally found a moment to breathe in each other's presence. Over a few years' journey of healing, you find that is both exhausting, yet all the more fulfilling at the same time.
Part 2 of 2 (Masterlist)
Warning(s): Past SA, Depictions of Grief, Violence, Angst, Miscommunication, Historical Inaccuracies [I tried my best to make it kind of accurate], Nudity (sexual and non-sexual), Mutual Masturbation, Oral Sex (f receiving), P in V Sex
Paul Mescal's facial hair in All of Us Strangers, if you can hear us, please save us. Nobody ask me how I went from "’Oh, I’m just gonna write some scenes about healing from trauma, and the rest is smut! Easy!" to then making it just a little longer than the first part. I'm a yapper, but holy shit XD. Anyway, this is just shameless pRopAgAnDa at what I personally view a husband to act like (even in modern times). So, without further ado, thousands of words of hurt/comfort and smut.
Word Count: 16.4k
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You were a lucky child. When you were twelve and your friend was married off to a man who was forty-two, you asked your father when you would be married.
He tucked you in that night, saying that he wasn’t certain, and that you had nothing to fear; for he wouldn’t promise you to a man who was in a war the same year you were born. He would have to know him personally as well, saying.
“It’s easier to like a man than have to plan his assassination if he dared lay a hand on you.”
You like to think he would have approved of Lucius; he was the once heir to the Roman Empire.
You don’t think he would have approved of your…informal marriage.
“A year.” Lucius stated as the two of you sat together in one of the piazzas. “As long as we are not separated from each other for more than three days, Rome will view us as married if we live in the same household for a year.”
You hummed. “And why should we care what Rome views?”
“Men won’t stop their advances on you if they saw you as my sister.” he explained. “Even as a wife, that doesn’t stir them.”
“It’s a very Christian belief of you to have.”
“But it makes them think thoroughly on if they want to risk tainting you.” Lucius finally looked at you. “Knowing that I would break every finger they touched you with.”
Even with his proclamation, you merely shrugged. “Being the emperor’s favorite whore, I doubt they would care.”
He sighed. “Do you want to know what my mother wrote? Her final words that will forever be with me because they are in ink? ‘Take her as your wife.’”
It had only been one day since Lucilla’s death, since Rome had become a Republic, and no one knew exactly what to do.
Yet…even at the mention of her presence, you felt tears spring to your eyes.
How you hated crying; and crying and crying.
“It is wise.” You finally settled on. “The people here too must see me as a traitor.”
“You would be dead if they did.”
“It’s still early.” You smiled sadly. “I desired to be free of the emperors, but all they must have saw was lust for power.”
Lucius sighed. “If it is a concern, then I believe it is best to leave Rome.”
Suddenly, you were no longer afraid for your life. You scowled. “Leave the city you risked your life to liberate?”
“It is not just my own life I need to think of now, is it?”
“Then think of mine.” you began. “I don’t wish to leave. Where would we even go? I know nothing outside of Rome.”
This would have been solved if you somehow still had the house you grew up in. The moment Geta claimed you, it was gone. Even with the fall of the Empire, and the birth of the Republic, you could not take it back.
Among many other things, you could not take it back.
“We’ll live just outside the walls.” Lucius suggested. “A farm perhaps a few miles from here-.”
“-A farm?” You questioned. “You know how to farm? Because I sure don’t.”
“I’ve lived longer on a farm than I have in a palace.”
It shouldn’t have surprised you, but it did. You also weren’t in the position to bargain. Even though it wasn’t going to be what most would deem an ‘official’ marriage, he still owned you. That was how it always was, whether living outside of the Roman walls or not. Still, you had to try.
“I will learn as much as I need to,” You shook your head. “but I will find a job in the city. You cannot believe I will be shut out-.”
“-Do you want to share a room, or would you like your own?”
You furrowed your brow. “What?”
Lucius restated. “We don’t have any money to buy a farm, so I’ll build us one. Do you want your own room?”
You had only known him for a grand total of a day and a half (if you were to add up all the previous times you had spoken to him before Macrinus’ death), so needless to say, his offer shocked you; more so, it impressed you.
“Isn’t it odd for a man and wife to not share a bed?” You asked.
“So, you want to share a room?”
“No.” was your immediate response. “I just…”
Am not used to compromising with men without them threatening my life.
“Won’t it cost money to build a house?” You asked instead. “None the less, more for another room?”
“I only want you to be happy, if we’re to be married.”
There you were, asking every question and not being satisfied with his answers, yet he was remaining patient.
“Thank you.” You bowed your head in thanks for just a second before questioning. “I am still allowed to have a job in the city? It will help with the cost, of course.”
 “Where exactly do you intend to work?”
He said your name; not ‘Julia’, the name you had whispered to him in his cell. Lucius was the only one who had said it to you, for you did not even tell Lucilla or Marcus. It still felt strange hearing it on your lips, nonetheless, his.
Still, shaking your discomfort away, you hummed humorlessly. “I know two women who run their own businesses; hairdressing and tailoring. I’m better at hair than clothes, but not so much. And you?”
He sighed. “I’ll see if there’s any other farmers needing a hand.”
“You’re going to work for a farmer to build a farm?”
“It sounded more bizarre in your head than when you said it aloud, did it not?”
That was the first thing you found out about Lucius after all the bloodshed and heartbreak of the last week:
He spoke with such a straight tone, you did not know he was joking until he would smile just a hint; you couldn’t really call it a true smile.
You managed to grin. “I suppose it makes sense. You should find one that will let us sleep there.”
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And he did. A farm just a few miles outside of Rome took both you and Lucius in. It was substantial, housing five chickens, two cows, three pigs, four horses, and seven human children. Albeit the children helped with the chores, but the eldest was only ten and could not manage any of the heavy lifting whatsoever, which was where Lucius came in.
From sun up to sun down, he’d work on the farm. The farmers, Atticus and Diana, let you sleep in the barn of all places. The hayloft was nice for the both of you; enough space to spread out but not be right next to each other. There was also somewhat of a wall between the two of you, giving the illusion of separate rooms.
It was certainly an adjustment for you; had been sleeping on the softest of beds for months, but even so, you just missed the bed from your old house.
Lucius fell asleep the second he laid on the hay.
Dreams and nightmares were always a peculiar thing. Some days, you would dream of your mother and father, some days, they would be of Lucilla and Marcus.
You had nightmares of what befell you before coming to the farm; Macrinus and his manipulation, Caracalla’s temper, Geta…
Yet, the worst that would happen would be you waking up more tired than the night prior. You knew Lucius was having nightmares too, but every time you approached him, he would lie and say he was fine, or simply not want to speak of it.
You stopped asking.
For the first few days on the farm, you were put to work by watching over the younger children when their mother was busy. Somehow, it was the older ones you didn’t mind, it was the youngest baby who was a handful.
It’s morbid to say, but you always wondered how any of them survived infancy.
Luckily, you managed to get back to Rome after perhaps a week of being stranded on the farm. It was almost an hour walk, and you had gotten up even before Lucius had, but it was worth it.
It wasn’t that you felt dead as you were on the farm per say, but walking through the streets brought a certain kind of life back into your steps.
You spent a good portion of the day trying to find the hairdressers you talk to Lucius about. Just as you were about to give up and try again tomorrow, something caught your ear.
Hebrew.
You turned over your shoulder and saw a man speaking in Latin to another man and a pregnant woman. The father had spoken in broken Latin before turning to his wife, speaking quickly in Hebrew as if to ask her what to say.
One of the men began to yell, and you rushed over, speaking to the patriarch of the family.
“What’s going on?” You asked quickly.
His eyes grew as if you were the first person in Rome to understand him (you probably were). “I paid for a bag of peaches fairly; two bronze, yet they’re saying it wasn’t enough.”
You turned to the men behind you. “He says he gave you two bronze for the peaches.”
“It was three.” The Roman man gritted his teeth.
Tilting your head, you tried. “Show me your stand so we may see.”
It was perhaps stupid of you to challenge him; yet, he controlled his tempter and led you to his fruit stand. The sign by the peaches indeed said ‘2’, but there was also a good amount of peaches blocking the bottom half of the sign.
When you moved a few, it read ‘3’.
You smiled, looking at the man who spoke Hebrew. “It is three, but it’s not your fault this brute didn’t notice either.”
He nodded, returning your grin before handing the men another copper. With an few mumbled exchanges, the man and his wife were on their way.
“You have Judeans in your family?” The man crudely asked.
Still, you decided to reciprocate his crassness with kindness. “I actually speak five languages.”
He rose his brows. “Is that a fact?”
“Yes, yes it is.”
He hummed, holding his hand out. “Isidorus.”
“Julia.” Was your immediate response as he took your hand and kissed your knuckles. It wasn’t even your own choice to say that name; it was what you lived by. Retracting your hand, you shake your head and said your own name. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-.”
“-All of Rome knows who you are.” He interrupted. “Do not be afraid of your own people. Most of them were there simply a week ago when you tried to slay Macrinus but was there to comfort lady Lucilla in her final moments.”
You only nodded, not wanting to be praised. “I thank you for your kindness.”
“With certain.” He nodded. “You are with child; only a monster would harm a woman carrying.”
The events of the past weeks had made you forgotten about the false babe. Luckily, the fear upon your face could be used to your advantage.
“Are you not well?” Isidorus questioned.
You dropped your gaze, stammering your tone. “The…I lost the child.”
He looked down as well. “Oh…I’m so sorry.”
“No,” you shook your head. “it’s…it feels odd. His father was terrible but…”
“Why are you perusing Rome unchaperoned?” He changed the subject.
 “My betrothed is being put to work,” you immediately answered. “and I am scouring the streets to find my own.”
“What has your luck been?”
“Nothing.”
Isidorus hummed. “I could change that.”
Even at the thought of what he was alluding to, you smiled. “Good sir, I am not in the position to sell my body-.”
“-None of that.” he waved his hand. “My brother works down at the entrance of the city gates. They’re always in need of translators.”
You nodded, considering. “When may I meet with him?”
“Tomorrow?” He asked. “Midday at the gates with many people watching so you do not feel threatened?”
The two of you laughed, and you agreed. “I shall be there. Thank you.”
“Anything to help a woman of the people.”
You walked all the way back to the farm with a skip in your step. Even at dinner, you were more talkative with the rest of the family. Lucius certainly took notice as the two of you were settling down for the night.
“You seemed better today.” He complimented, laying onto his bed of hay.
“So, I’ve been absolutely horrible the rest?” You teased, peeking around the wall of the hayloft.
 “No, just what I think you were like before everything; more yourself.” He explained. “Did the hairdressers go well?”
Leaning against the wall, you crossed your arms. “I’m actually working as a translator down by the city entrance.”
He gave you a look. “How’d this come about?”
“Well,” you began. “I overheard two men arguing, one was speaking Hebrew, and I asked him what was wrong. There was a misunderstanding over peaches of all things, I helped them talk it out, and it was solved with no bloodshed. The vendor said his brother works at the gates and is always in need of translators and offered to meet with him tomorrow. It will be midday and so many people around; do not worry.”
Lucius nodded. “I’ll accompany you.”
“Did you not hear what I just said? I shall be fine.”
“I have no doubt you would.” You knew that was a lie. “One of the scythes broke today, I’ll need to buy another one in the city.”
You didn’t know if that was a lie or not, but it wouldn’t surprise you if Lucius would sneak out in the night and break equipment simply to go with you.
Sighing, you went behind the wall to your side of the hayloft. “Fine.”
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To no one but Lucius’ surprise, Isidorus had not lied about his brother, nor the job offer. Of course, the brother had been off put at a woman being the translator (because everyone knows that they are the lesser sex). Still, after some convincing (you talked to a Greek family, a man from Anatolia, and two brothers from Persia), he said you could be put to work.
Lucius stood there the whole hour you had proved yourself.
“You couldn’t have gotten the scythe while I worked?” You questioned him while walking home.
He kept his gaze on the road before him, carrying the farm equipment. “It was engaging to watch.”
You hummed. “I could see how engaged you were while you stood like this.” You crossed your arms and scowled.
“I did not look like that.” He scoffed.
“You did so!” You refuted, lowering your voice. “My name is Lucius Verus Aurelius, the Last Gladiator, son of Lucilla and Maximus, grandson of Marcus Aurelius.”
He looked down, mouth upturning a little. “I do not sound like that.”
“Is that a smile?!” you gasped. “Gods above, I never thought you could unless you were attempting humor!
“Away with you, woman.”
You only laughed as the sun was starting to set.
There was something called a “Fullmoon” period in a marriage. Most now would say it’s “Honeymoon”, but the period in time where a man and woman were in a complete state of euphoria together was called “Fullmoon” because it only lasted for a month.
You and Lucius (even with your strange circumstance) were not immune to this.
A month later, when you had fully settled into a mundane life of working in different areas for hours upon hours, the only times you saw Lucius was when you ate dinner with the farmer’s family, and before going to bed.
It didn’t’ effect you that much for the first three months, as you both were still on good terms and were fine simply cohabitating without affection. This marriage was purely for protection and to honor Lucilla’s wishes.
Then…Lucius came to you one day, saying that together, you both had enough money to build a farm. He already had a patch of land picked out from the help of the famer who employed him. It was five miles away from the farm you stayed at. Five miles more of a journey to the city.
You would move in once the walls were built, which he said would only take a week or two.
It was too fast for you.
Still, you had to go along with it, because you were to be his wife; nothing more. Even so, nothing out of the ordinary besides your hidden, simmering annoyance happened between you two.
The first day construction was to be done was when light was shed upon it.
“Lucius!” You called his name as you approached him and a few other men hauling the wood and stone that would be used. It was mid-twilight when you ran to them.
He furrowed his brow, walking towards you. “Aren’t you meant to be in the city?”
Grinning from ear to ear, you shook your head. “I asked for the day off because of the house. He said I-.”
“-You need to go back and tell him you’ll work.”
Your smile fell from his usual, monotone demeanor. “He doesn’t expect me to come in today-.”
“-Then he’ll be happy to see you.”
“May I just talk for a moment?!” You yelled.
His said nothing.
Sighing, you began. “I will be useful in any capacity. If you need me to help dig for water, measure supports, lift anything-.”
“-Your shoulder cannot carry-.”
You retorted. “-It might be the shoulder you shot, but it’s the shoulder I have to live with, and I will tell you if something is too heavy to carry.”
It hadn’t been the first time you brought up your shoulder after Rome was free. Yet, in the past, it was always out of good fun; something to say to him when you didn’t want to carry as little as an egg from the chicken coop. You told the children the story too why you had to set one of them down after carrying her for so long.
You expected them to cower away from Lucius when he returned for supper, but instead, they all tackled him to the ground to defend your honor.
They didn’t hurt him of course, and you laughed until you couldn’t breathe.
Yet, at that moment, you said it with nothing but disdain; and he heard it in every word. You thought it would have been enough to guilt him into letting you help, you made sure of it.
Lucius titled his head back toward the main road. “Go on, now. The sun will be up soon, it’ll be better to walk without daylight beating down on you.”
The audacity he had. Usually, on the times you’d have disagreements of sorts, you’d try to leave with dignity; perhaps a word of sarcasm or two.
No, you simply turned on your heel and marched away in a huff.
You were harsher that day when translating, and you were still angry by the time the day ended. You ate dinner outside by yourself (until three of the seven children came outside to eat with you), and did not utter a ‘goodnight’ to Lucius before laying down to sleep.
Neither of you spoke to the other for days after that.
It was one morning, not even when the sun was out, as you tried to tiptoe around him, did he ask from his makeshift bed.
“Do you remember where the house is?”
You nearly fell off the ledge of the hayloft. “What is wrong with you?!”
“Do you remember?”
“Yes!” you whispered, afraid to wake the whole farm. “Why?”
“We made the water pump, and the walls and floors are finished. We’ll be able to sleep there now.”
“I don’t see the appeal in sleeping in a house with no roof.”
“I’ll put half of it on today. Tell your foreman too that you won’t be able to work for the next week.”
You furrowed your brow. “Why?”
“I’m teaching you how to tend to a farm.” He wrapped his blankets tighter around him and turned his back to you.
And you continued on your way; making the long trek to the city, which would only be longer when you moved to the house.
When your work was over, you walked and walked. You took a short break at the farmer’s house, making your final goodbyes to the children, and gathering what little belongings you owned.
As you tried to leave, Diana stopped you. She was leading one of the horses, a berber, behind her.
“Take her,” she handed you the reins. “you shouldn’t have to walk so far.”
You shook your head. “I simply cannot-.”
“-I insist.” She smiled. “She’s yours now. Think of it as payment for helping me with the little beasts that are my children.”
Smiling politely, it soon faded. She took notice. “What is it?”
“…I’ve only ever ridden once, and I was a child.”
She sighed yet was still kind. “Come on, my husband’s horse is at your farm. I’ll ride back with him.”
Despite your inexperience, it was actually nice riding a horse. It was perhaps the closest you could ever come to flying in your lifetime; maybe that’s why you enjoyed it. As you were nearing your soon-to-be home, you saw a familiar silhouette along with some others.
Atop the house, against the setting sun, you watched as Lucius continued to add tiles to the unfinished roof. His shirt was off, and even with night beginning to set in with the cold air, he was still breaking a sweat from the rigorous work. You would be a liar if you say that you didn’t catch yourself staring, and it was Diana who had to take the reins.
“What a fine home!” She broke you out of your trance, and when Lucius looked in your direction, you snapped your gaze away.
Lucius nodded. “All that needs to be done is the roof.” He jumped onto the ground just as you were sliding off the horse. He gave you his hand as you were, and you took it.
“Thank you.”
Atticus and the other workers went to a lone tree where their horses were tied. Atticus then approached both you and Lucius.
“Well,” he smiled. “it was lovely hosting the both of you. Please come back as often as you can; I’m sure the children will miss you.”
You all exchanged your final goodbyes, and it when everyone rode off away from you, did you realize something. This was the first time in a while you were alone with Lucius that wasn’t when going to sleep or waking up.
“Do you have a name for the horse?” Lucius asked.
Turning over your shoulder, you led the steed to the tree, petting her as you began to tie her up. “Not at the moment. She’s yours too, do you have any?”
“You’ll be with her more; you should name her.”
Humming you looked at him when you finished securing the horse. “You asked them to give her to me, didn’t you?”
He shrugged. “They asked how they could repay you for taking care of their children, I mentioned how it would be a longer journey to the city once we moved here. That’s all I did.”
…He was better at asking for forgiveness than for permission; that was another thing you learned about him. Still, you nodded your appreciation, inspecting the area around you. It was quite beautiful even with its plainness. The fields stretched on for miles, and there were no tall buildings to cover the night sky. Even the unfinished house brought a sense of happiness to you.
Something that was, at least partially, your own.
“Where will the barn and chicken coop go?” You questioned.
A hint of a smile played on his mouth, but in Lucius fashion, did his best to hide it. “You were complaining about not having a roof, and now you wonder about things for the animals?”
“Perhaps I’m more interested in farming that you are.”
“I’ll teach you.” he led you into the house. “Come on.”
 The front living space was large, and in the corner of it had an oven, so that was where the kitchen would be. Lucius showed you the two rooms as well; each having a single pillow and a blanket.
“We’ll begin planting tomorrow.” he announced. “I don’t think I’ll have to wake you up.”
“You won’t.” You nodded. “Goodnight, Lucius.”
“Goodnight.” He said your name.
You didn’t think you’d ever get over the sound of your own name from his lips.
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You named the horse after your mother. Well…not the exact same name, but a similar one. It was quite a scene too when confessing to Lucius you could exactly remember how to ride a horse by yourself.
He didn’t laugh at you, that was what greatly surprised you. He spent an hour teaching you, and you were able to ride her on your own.
Farming was more difficult than you thought it would be, but not so horrible either. Yes, where Lucius was patient with you for the first few days, he made a few snide comments as time passed. Nothing outright mean, but still enough to get under your skin.
Still, you managed to pick it up within the few weeks after that.
He had even let you help him finish the roof of the house; something you didn’t expect him to do. After living in the house for a month, both of you managed to buy actual beds for your rooms, among other luxuries like a few tables and chairs for the main living area, and utensils both for cooking and for eating.
The bathroom was completely bare. Having spent all the money on everything else, it would take time for the both of you to buy a bathtub. Bathing wasn’t a problem back on Atticus and Diana’s farm, but now being away from them, you would be forced to rely on the public baths in the city…
Even with some bathhouses having baths only for women, that did not stop men from forcing their way into them.
You didn’t mind being dirty for weeks on end.
The two of you fell into another pattern of life; you going into the city and spending hours translating foreign dialogue, and Lucius working on the farm for most days, sometimes accompanying you.
There was…something else strange as well.
It was always a coin toss on what weeks Lucius would speak to you or not.
Yes, he was always a man of few words, but this was different. There were some days when you asked him about his day, he would tell you what boring tasks he did. Than, on others, it was just one word: “Good.”
Never “Bad”, never “Just okay”; only “Good”. Even when you knew it wasn’t, that’s all he would say.
And you could endure it.
It had already been a little over half a year since the two of you started living together. In the eyes of Rome (as mere Plebians), you would be married once a year passed.
This was perhaps the best marriage you could as for as a Roman woman. Still…every day that Lucius would not speak to you only brought more dread upon your shoulders.
When he stopped even looking at you, that was when you went to Diana one day.
“It’s so lovely to see you.” She smiled, setting down two cups of wine and sitting. “It’s felt like ages!”
With her youngest baby on your lap, you chuckled, taking a sip of your drink. “You honestly didn’t need to get the wine out.”
“Nonsense!” She waved her hand. “It’s a celebration just to be in your presence. I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you as well.”
“How’s the farm? Lucius?”
“Well,” you took another sip, setting your cup down. “the farm has been alright. I know at least how to properly water crops and know when they’re ready to harvest or not. I help Lucius sometimes, but…he likes things his own way. He was a farmer too, I understand.”
She hummed. “And as a betrothed? I hope having your own home would help; to me, you two treated each other more like acquaintances than anything else.”
All you could do was avoid eye contact and bounce the giggling baby on your knee.
“Ah.” She sighed. “So not much has changed?”
“We both talk more than we had at your far, but somehow, less at the same time.” You explained.
Diana reached over and held your hand, asking softly. “When was the last time you were intimate?”
As if she were a man, you tore your hand from hers. “What?”
“I do not wish anything to be forced upon you,” she stated first. “especially with what has happened to you. But…it is still important, especially to your future marriage.”
“We…we haven’t done anything in…months.” You were not going to tell her you hadn’t even seen him naked. You were not going to tell her you hadn’t done you “duty” as a woman.
She nodded. “There must be something plaguing his mind terribly.”
“I know that!” You cried. “He just won’t tell me.”
“Men do not like talking,” Diana sighed. “I have been married to Atticus for fifteen years, and even after ten children, there are parts of his past I still do not know of. What Lucius frets over is important though. You must dig your heels into the ground and let him know you are not doing anything until he tells you what he has issue with.”
The baby on your lap cooed as you held her, reaching for parts of your clothing. Diana took her from you once the baby started fussing, and you offered her a grateful smile.
“I’ll try my best with him.”
She squeezed your shoulder. “He will come to his senses. If not, then he truly hit his head too hard in the Colosseum.”
Except, you couldn’t confront him when you got home. Even though the sun was only beginning to set, when you arrived, the house was silent. You peeked into his bedroom and saw that he was already fast asleep.
With a sigh, you finished your nightly activities, and when the sun went down, you were in your own bed.
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The nightmare was unlike any you had before.
Hands from all around you reached out to you. Some grabbed clumps of your hair, stuck their fingers into your mouth, caressed the most intimate parts of your body, or even tear your skin off.
You blinked and then you were in the palace, surrounded by cloaked figures. Someone forced you onto your back, and you looked up and saw Geta, raising a knife high above his head before diving it into your stomach. He carved it out before digging his hands into the opening he made and pulled out your womb.
After sitting up in bed, you had thought you awoken. When you opened your bedroom door, you were welcomed to a field of reeds, seeing nothing for miles. All but a silhouette in the distance. You could not make out it to be a man or a woman; all you knew was that you needed to run to them.
Yet, even as you dashed through the fields, calling out a name you do not even remember, your feet sank into the ground with each step.
The earth swallowed you whole before you could even reach them.
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You didn’t awake with a scream; you didn’t even awake with a cry. You did awake in a sweat. Sitting up, you slowly pulled the blanket away from your body. Your stomach was unwounded, and nothing had happened.
Without knowing why, you rose from your bed and slipped on your sandals. Not even putting on a robe, you walked out of the house into the cold, night air. Numbly, you treaded through the tall grass away from the house and stopped.
The stars above you watched as you fell to your knees, and the past finally had the last laugh.
You wept for your mother (whose touch you never felt).
You wept for your father (who you had to take care of the same way he took care of you).
You wept for Marcus (the first man outside of your father to ever see you as a person).
You wept for Lucilla (the woman who saved you in more ways than one).
You wept for the innocence you lost to the twin emperors (and how you mercilessly killed them).
You wept and wept, until you felt bile claw its way up your throat and out of your mouth.
The tears did not stop even after you were finished.
Two hands grabbed your shoulders from behind, and you tried to tear yourself away with a sharp cry. You were turned around, and even though your tears blinded you, you could see that it was Lucius.
“What’s wrong?” He asked, his eyes grown.
You couldn’t speak clearly, only shaking your head and saying ‘No’ over and over. Lucius led you to the water pump and sat you down by it. Cranking the handle until the water flowed freely, he cupped his hand to catch some of it before gently washing your face.
The cool water grounded you, and your sobs began to slow. Once you were only left with shallow breathing and a stuffed nose, Lucius finally sat beside you.
“What happened?” He asked again, although, returning to his normal, straight-toned self.
“Bad dream.” Was all you said.
He said nothing at first. Then, looking down at the grass beneath him, he said. “Would talking about it help you?”
It was meant to be a helpful question, but it only angered you. “You ask that now? After I run out into the night screaming?”
Lucius squinted his eyes. “Why does that bother you?”
“I know you have nightmares too.” You scoffed. “I have asked you dozens of times if you wish to talk to me about them, and you have always said no. You’ve never once asked me about mine, so how dare you expect me to tell you about it now when you cannot even share yours with me!”
“That’s not fair.” He shook his head.
You stood up, walking back to the house. “You’re right, it isn’t fair.”
He jumped to his feet. “You can’t walk away without telling me why this is troubling you.”
“You first.”
“What?”
You turned to face him. “We are to be married in less than a year, at least ‘In the eyes of Rome’ as you say, yet you do not even look at me anymore!”
His shoulders fell, and he shook his head. “I am looking at you-.”
“-I ask you how you are these days, and you lie to me every time.” You interrupted. “The few instances you allow me to work beside you, you criticize every little thing I do. I understand that I am the farthest thing you wanted for as a wife-.”
 It was that word that struck a chord. Despite saying it every so often those past few months…it was only then it occurred to you that where Lucius was your first husband…you were not his first wife.
He tore his gaze away from yours, as if he knew you had figured it out. You sighed. “Gods above…I’m sorry for what has happened to her, and I will never know the loss of a love like that…but I cannot be viewed as her replacement-.”
“-Who told you that you were?” He sharpened his tone.
You swallowed, knowing that this would all end in tears no matter what you said. “You do not tell me anything. I will never ask you to care for me the way you cared for her, but she is gone-.”
“-I couldn’t do anything after she died but weep and watch her body float into the ocean.” He hissed. “I vowed to kill the man that slaughtered her, and I didn’t. It had been perhaps just a month since her death, did I promise myself to another woman. I have dishonored her memory three times.”
“I do not know how long you need me to apologize for something I could not control, but I will if that means you will stop hating me.”
“I don’t hate you.”
“You hate that I will be your wife!” Your voice was growing hoarse. “I don’t understand it at all. I will be whatever it is you wish me to be in few months’ time, because you will own me. Even if you wish me to be dead, it shall be done because what I want will not matter-.”
“-Must you make everything about yourself?!” He finally yelled. “Would it soothe you if I said I despised every part of you? That if Jupiter himself came down and offered me my old life in exchange for you, I would give you up to him?! Would it give you any peace of mind if I told you I would have rather died in the arena than live a thousand years with you?”
You had expected him to at least pause after he made his confession. To at least have the courage to look you in the eye and watch as the words sunk into your being. Yet, as soon as he finished, he stomped back to the house; and you were alone outside again.
The tears upon your face glimmered from the light in the sky above you, for all you could do was stare at the little farmhouse Lucius had built for you.
How strange that something you once saw as a sign of devotion, was now revealed to be one of complicity.
He had admitted his disdain for your future marriage. You knew that it would be loveless (you would never escape that), but you wished at least for respect. Seeing as how you were not even going to have that, you dragged your feet over to the tree where your horse was tied up.  Mounting her with nothing but the clothes on your back, you raced down the pathway.
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For the first day, you had stayed at Diana and Atticus’ farm. You said nothing about Lucius, and tried to spend the most time with the children to avoid any questions.
On the second day, you finally went back to the city. Even though the man in charge of you yelled louder than Lucius had at you, it did not phase you. You merely nodded and returned to work. With what money they paid you for the day, you spent it on a room at the safest inn you could find. You had another nightmare that night. Not as horrible as the one two days prior, but awful enough for you to lay awake until the sun rose.
The third day seemed to be ordinary, until you finished your job, and you were promenading along the market. As you eyed the fruit at Isidorus’ stand, a man came to stand beside you.
“Good sir,” you heard Lucius’ voice. “do you have a wife?”
Isidorus nodded. “I do.”
“What from your stand would you give her if she was angry at you?”
He eyed you before smiling at Lucius. “My ears to listen.”
You turned, promptly walking away. Of course, Lucius followed.
“I didn’t know you confided into strangers about our qualms.”
“He’s not a stranger.” you kept trying to lose him. “And gifts will not suffice for an apology this time.”
He got in front of you, uttering your name. You stopped, sighing. “What else have you come to say to me?”
“That I am a fool.”
Although you weren’t necessarily expecting him to admit it, you only nodded. “You very much are.”
He began. “For my entire life, I was not allowed to be entirely truthful with others. Whether it was how I felt in the moment, or even my own name. I’m not used to the freedom of being candid with one another. And I have been mistreating you; I have provided a home, but I haven’t provided your wellbeing. Ari-.” Lucius paused, breathing through his nose. “Arishat and I lived on a farm, that was all I knew while being a husband. I will love her until the end of my days, but that does not give me the right to neglect you. I will…I will try with all my being to share my thoughts with you.”
You stared at him, feeling as if you would blink, and you would awaken from another dream. Yet once you did and saw that he was still in front of you, you said.
“I didn’t mean to insult your memory of her.”
He shook his head. “I believe she would hit me if she were here and saw how I treated you.”
“Thank you.” You nodded. “Truly, for everything. I…it’s not only you, I don’t know if I will ever feel like myself after…everything.”
Lucius already knew. Still, looking around himself, he then said. “Where is your horse?”
“The inn I’ve been staying at has a stable. You walked the whole way here?”
“It’s what I deserved.”
“You smell horrible.” You mustered a shy grin.
He mirrored you, looking away. “I have for a while.”
“I do as well. I was…I was going to brave the baths; would you like to join me?”
Your offer took him by surprise. Usually, a question like that would be an invitation to more salacious activities to take place. Still, what took him aback more was how you were initially so afraid of the public baths, yet there you were.
“I shall.” He agreed.
Thus, the two of you walked beside one another. There were many baths in Rome, yet it would be challenging to find one that had a separate bath for women and one for men. By the time you reached the third bathhouse, you sighed.
“This will do.”
Lucius shook his head. “I’ll ask the workers at this one if they know-.”
“-No.” You stopped him. “It’s fine. I wish to speak more with you.”
He was still hesitant, but gave in. The two of you entered and drifted off to the separate changing rooms. It was strange that the bathhouse had rooms for the different sex to disrobe, but not baths itself.
After locking your clothes away, you ventured out into the main pool. You were welcomed to an array of naked bodies. You weren’t entirely innocent of course, even before everything. You were never to see any of these people again; it was Lucius you would live with.
Quickly, you disappeared half of your body under the surface of the water and clung to the wall of the large bath. Other people around you laughed and socialized, only putting you more in the eyes of men who only came to the baths for one thing.
Yet, before you could take a moment to worry, your eyes fell to Lucius who entered. You soon averted them and felt the water shift beside you as he entered. You turned to look at him, leveling yourself with the side of the pool, essentially shoulder to shoulder with him. The hear radiating off of his body onto yours reminded you too much of that night months ago; the one where you whispered your name into his ear.
“What were you like as a boy?” You questioned in an attempt to hide how flustered you were.
He hummed. “Why do you ask?”
“If you wish to be more honest with me, than I think it should be best to stary with something minor.”
“I understand. I was spoiled growing up in the palace. Still, I wished nothing more than for adventure. All my life, the mere thought of war and battles were taught as a way to bring glory to the empire; pride for one’s family. I had gotten my foolish wish when Maximus died, and my mother sent me away from Rome.” He paused momentarily, before continuing. “I ran all across the land until I was thirteen, where I finally settled in Numidia. I had changed my named too many times to count and settled upon Hanno.”
Your attention did not waver for a moment. When he was finished you asked. “How old were you when you left?”
“Eight…” There was a sad silence between the two of you. A silence held in almost reverence for all the troubles he had been through. “What about you?”
Even with your uneasiness to answer your starkly different childhood, you did so; also have been promising to be honest with him. You spoke of your father, your past friends, the house you grew up in. He never once looked upon you with envy or hatred.
“Your father sounded like a good man.” He said.
“He was.” You nodded, feeling a weight settle in your chest. "I think he would have liked you.”
“I can only hope.”
The conversation halted after that, unknown if you should wait for him to ask a question, or for you to ask another. Both of your eyes drifted around the bath house as people filtered in and out. When your gaze fell back onto Lucius’ you watched his eyes flicker to something behind you. Before you could utter a word, he placed his hand upon your bare back, bringing his lips to the space between your ear and your jaw.
It all happened so fast you had no time to react, and your body shivered upon the feel of him being so close to you.
“There’s a man eyeing you from behind.” He whispered into your skin. “Don’t look at him, just keep looking at me. I’m sorry.”
You pulled away slightly, doing as he told. He traced circles on your back with his thumb, staring intently at you. Even as you shrunk under his eyes, they did not frighten you.
Deciding to play along, you trailed your hand up his bare arm until resting on his shoulder. You felt his skin erupt into goosebumps and he took a sharp intake of breath.
“Okay?” You asked.
He nodded. “Yes, it’s just…it’s been a while.”
Anyone with any sense knew that meant more than one thing. It had been a while since he felt anyone’s touch; nonetheless, a naked woman’s.
From behind him, you saw a small group of girls all looking at you. They all looked a little younger than you, and acted like so, giggling loudly and talking without a care in the world. It was only then that you noticed they were looking at Lucius.
“Is there someone eyeing me now?” He attempted to tease you when he noticed your gaze.
You nodded, no hint of humor behind your voice. “A good few of them.”
“Is that so?”
You removed your hand. “I wouldn’t mind, you know.”
“Wouldn’t mind what?” He pinched his eyebrows together.
“…Getting your release from a woman that isn’t me.” You were puzzled by his seeming ignorance. “You’re a man, I understand-.”
He said your name with somewhat of gasp. You didn’t listen one bit.
“No, I mean it. I will not be more selfish than I already have been, expecting you to remain celibate because I don’t think I will-.”
Lucius said your name again and you stopped. Even when you did, he said it a third time as if to know he had your attention. He continued to run his fingers up and down your back.
“I will not dishonor you-.”
“-I have been dishonored several times before, it does not matter-.”
“-Listen to me.” He said softly yet firmly. “Even if I desired someone carnally, it is not selfish of you to want my loyalty. I’m not a boy who wishes to bed anything that breathes. I don’t think I can do so with someone I do not have any deep feelings for. You are my wife, and I will not treat you less.”
He didn’t call you his ‘betrothed’. As if, the moment you accepted his apology, you were already his other half. To hear him speak with so much certainty after neither of you knowing what any day would bring…it brought an astonishing comfort you never knew you needed.
“Thank you.” You felt like your heart could beat again.
“You don’t-.”
“-No but I do. I don’t…I don’t think I could give you anything of myself if you wanted it. It’s still…I remember a lot of what Geta did to me, and I forgot it at the same time. It doesn’t happen a lot in my nightmares, but it still does. That one night you found me he…he cut out my womb and held it in his hands. I thought I woke up, but I didn’t, and I think I was in Elysian Fields, but I only saw a shadow. I don’t know what any of that means.”
Lucius let you finish all of the anxiety you had thrown onto him. Still, releasing a shallow breath, he said.
“You die in most of my dreams.” He clarified. “The bad ones, I mean. A lot of people do, but you’ve been in them the most. There are times I see both you and Arishat, or my mother, or all three of you and…those are the worst. The night I found you outside, I couldn’t…I had a horrible dream that I couldn’t even see your face, but I knew it was you when I found you hanging in the Colosseum.”
If the both of you weren’t naked and, in the bathhouse, you would have embraced him. Yet, with the most understanding look in your eyes, you brought your hand to the base of his neck, his loose curls between your fingers. You swore you felt him relax into your touch for just a moment.
“I’ve known everyone to have their own beliefs of dreams.” You whispered. “They’re meant to predict the future, they reflect the past, they are punishments, they are blessings, and they mean nothing. I wonder if it’s possible they are all of them.”
He nodded. “I don’t know what I believe in anymore.”
“I do.” Lucius unknowingly leaned into you just ever so slightly. You grinned from ear to ear, pulling your hand away from him. “I believe you need to cut your hair.”
He chortled. “I’m not spending anything on cutting it. It’s fine.”
“I’ll cut it then.”
“I would rather be stabbed.”
“Oh, quit being dramatic.” you playfully swatted him. “There’s a reason I would’ve been a better hairdresser than tailor.”
The two of you teased one another for a minute longer after that. Than, even though the conversation died, it was not in vain. There was a quiet gentleness and protectiveness as you both shared a short distance between each other while bathing. Lucius kept his eye on you more than you did him, knowing that it was always possible a man could try to take advantage of you.
When all was said and done, you got your horse from the stable at the inn, and the two of you rode back to the farm with a newfound understanding of each other.
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More than a year and a half have passed since the fall of the Roman Empire and its subsequent birth of the Republic. Your strange marriage with Lucius grew into a friendship of respect and understanding. You both talked more than you had when you were first betrothed, even if your busy schedules remained the same.
The farm had improved after its first harvest, even raising enough money to build a chicken coop and house a few chickens. The house itself was more furnished, and the two of you managed to purchase a bathtub, no longer needing to use the public ones in the city.
Both of you had changed as well. Even with what minimal farm work you did, it built both your strength and stamina. Lucius had begun to grow out his facial hair; not much for it to be an actual beard, but more so just under his nose. You’d joke about it looking like a caterpillar, to which he would lightly shove you away.
After the intimate discussion the two of you shared, it was only then you both realized you still didn’t know much about each other. Most importantly, the little things that made each of you a person.
So, you’d take time to get to know one another.
You were helping Lucius pull weeds around the crops when you found out he had ripped a monkey’s throat out with his teeth during his very first gladiator fight.
You were reading a collection of poetry one night when Lucius told you that you mouth the words of whatever you’re reading if you find it most interesting.
During supper one night, Lucius ate the entirety of the plate only to then eat whatever else you hadn’t. That was when your theory was proven right; he does forget to eat sometimes.
Both of you had tried to keep the housework to an equal amount; if he cooked one night, you’d clean the kitchen and vice versa. Yet, some remained stagnant; you always cut his hair, yet he always changed the horses’ shoes.
Cutting his hair was perhaps your favorite way to speak with him.
“Remember to clean your sandals before coming in next time.” He reminded you as he sat on a tree trunk outside. “You tracked in mud.”
Standing behind him while trimming small hairs, you shook your head. “My apologies, master of the house; it was downpouring and I was freezing.”
“Serves you right, I’d say.”
You placed the tip of the shears against his neck. “What else do you have to say?”
He snickered. “That you’re an astonishing woman who I am blessed to have.”
“Wrong answer, all lies.” You pretended to stab him, only to bring the shears back to his hair.
“I’m not lying!” Lucius laughed.
You only gave him a ‘tsk’ before continuing. “Are you sleeping any better?”
He said nothing at first. Your eyes drifted down to his hands and saw him pull on his tunic; another telltale sign of his nervousness.
“I keep seeing my mother’s face.” He admitted. “Only her face, nothing else.”
“It was the third night last night, right?”
“Yes.”
You sighed. “Would you want to hear a dream I had a few days ago to make you feel better?”
“Better because it was happy, or because you think I’ll feel happy I wasn’t you?”
“The latter.”
“Tell me.”
You turned his head to the side gently, continuing your work. “I stood in front of the entire senate of Rome, and they were all laughing at me. I don’t even know what I said, they only laughed and laughed.”
“Is that not what happened to you in the waking day?”
“No, they listened…I think.” You shook our head. “It more so angers me that, in the waking life, I presented logic to them, and they still chose Macrinus who showed nothing of the sort.”
“Some men like to speak of only desiring logic yet run away with their emotions once it is presented.” Lucius stated. “What had you told them?”
“That all of Rome would continue to riot if they killed Lucilla.” You said grimly. “I still don’t understand; they had their proof of the rage Rome’s children could feel when their general was killed, the only reason the city did not fall was because Macrinus was slain. I’m done.”
You set your shears down and Lucius stood, shaking the fallen hair off his clothes. He turned to you.
“If it matters at all, I think the only reason this house hasn’t fallen is because of you.”
Grinning from ear to ear, you shoved him playfully. “Away with you, you’re just as much of the reason as I am.”
“I do all that I can.”
There were moments like this where you would not speak of childhood memories or events of your day. These moments were reserved for the days where it felt like time slowed down just to give you two the grace to speak about them in more detail.
With only a single candle between the two of you one quiet night, you told him how you have to walk a different path in the city sometimes simply to avoid brothels; hating the sounds you would hear from inside, the stench of cheap perfume and sweating bodies burning your nose, the men who would brag to their friends about the women they had.
At breakfast one day, before the sun had even rose, Lucius told you about a time when he was ten, still on the run. He had gone into a man’s house with the promise of food, only to then be hit the head with something so heavy, he was knocked out. He had awoken in a dark room, but managed to find a curtained window, and escaped. He never knew what would have happened to him if he had woken up just a minute later.
There was tenderness you shared with him that you had never shared with anyone in your life.You sht
That was only more apparent on one fateful day.
The first bad omen for the day that morning was when you had run out of sugar for breakfast that morning. The second was when your horse was extra stubborn as you rode her into the city; it was so out of the ordinary, you wondered if you did something to make her hate you.
Still, everything was fine once you went to work. At least it was for the first half of the day.
There were aggressive people from across the land coming into the city you certainly had to deal with, but the worst was when a man twice your size bluffed you with a slap. Even so, the other men you worked with had yelled and sent her away.
That day though…there was a woman with a look in her eyes.
You thought you had seen pure rage when you had been with Geta. Yet, that day was a lesson to you; wrath had many faces.
She mumbled in Greek, but you did not know what she said at first. Then, she attempted to speak Latin. You politely told her you could speak Greek, and so with exhaustion, she told you that she was going to visit her mother.
When asked for her mother’s name, she didn’t say it. After asking again, she became enraged, yelling at you that she should just be able to be let in. When you resisted, she grabbed your bad arm, yanking it to pull you closer to her.
The pain shot through your shoulder like a bolt of lightning, and you cried out. She tugged on your hair as the men beside you tried to pry her away from you. Luckily, she didn’t manage to yank any of it out once the men forced her away from you. Tears fell freely over your face as you cradled yourself, unable to stop the sobs from leaving your lips.
They let you leave early yet paid you as if you were there the whole day.
The ride back to the farm wasn’t any better, but at least your steed took notice of your heartache and was more merciful to you. When you made it home, you slowed her down when you saw Lucius limping towards the house.
You both stopped where you were, staring at one another as if you weren’t supposed to be seeing the other.
“Why are you back so early?” He asked first.
“Why are you dragging your foot?” You asked second.
Lucius took a deep breath, and you saw tears in his eyes. “I fell.”
The only time you had seen him cry was when burying Lucilla; it wouldn’t be from simply falling. You slowly pulled yourself off your horse but did so quick enough before he could rush to help you. You wished nothing more than to pull him into the warmth of the house, to sit him down and tend to his wound to distract you from your own.
Yet, the moment you took his hand, he began to weep.
“Oh Lucius.” You whispered, bringing your hand up to cradle his face. He wrapped both of his arms around you, bringing you onto the ground with him. You yelped a little when he squeezed your bad shoulder too tight, and he pulled away.
“What happened?” He asked.
You shook your head. “You need-.”
“-What happened?!”
Knowing he wouldn’t stop asking, you told him. “Someone at the gate attacked me. Pulled on my bad arm, my hair…it wasn’t as bad as you’d think-.”
“-Where is he?” He lowered his tone and his demeanor.
Your jaw dropped into a surprised huff. “She is long gone by now, and even if she wasn’t then as my husband, you should stay with me instead of wandering the streets of Rome hoping to find someone to be your anger’s victim!”
Though he still wore that rage upon his face, it soon fell once he saw your own tears fall from your eyes like dewdrops on flowers. Lucius laid himself flat on the dirt, and you sat above him.
“I have been married to you longer than I had been to Arishat.” He confessed. “I knew her for longer, but-but not as deeply; no, I-I knew her more than…I don’t…It’s been long since her death, yet there are moments I think of her, and I cannot stop crying.”
You never knew this was in his heart. You knew to never speak of Arishat, only listen whenever he would bring her up (even so, it was once in a blue moon).
“I’m sorry.” He sniffled, trying to pull himself together. “I know she is gone, and I shouldn’t be-.”
“-You shouldn’t what?” You interrupted. “Remember her? You think I wish for you to forget the woman you so loved?”
He shook his head. “No, but it’s selfish of me to-.”
You were the one to make him lose his words this time. With both hesitation certainty, you placed his head into your lap. It was too late for you to stop once you did, and you felt your own body tense. Then, upon taking a look at his body battered from rigorous work, and another at his face, which relaxed with his eyes fully shut, you ran your fingers through his hair.
“Lucius,” you sighed. “never will I think you are a horrible man for mourning her. You missing her shows just how much you adored her, and how she was a treasure to you. In another life, above all, I wish I could have met her. You are not in the wrong for wanting to see her again. I know you do not love me-.”
“-I do love you.” He opened his eyes upon saying it.
Your heart felt as if it was going to beat itself out of your chest and run away when he said those four words. To preserve your sanity, you took it a different way and smiled sadly.
“Not in the way you loved her.” You said softly. “But what else more can I ask for in a husband than one who treats me with a gentleness I did not know was possible? One who has been there to protect me even before we were married?”
Lucius took a deep breath, rubbing his face to clear away his tears. “You’re too good to me.”
“Gods above,” you groaned tiredly. “we can go back and forth on who deserves each other. Let us just go back into the house, have supper, and sleep.”
“I would like that.” He hissed as he went to stand.
Helping him, once he was on his best foot, you said. “You never told me what you did to your leg.”
He looked behind him at the field. “There was a snake and a rock.”
You gave him a look. “And what happened with them?”
“I don’t wish to speak of it.” He said grimly.
In any other instance, you would have laughed. Yet, as his eyes were still heavy from crying, you just nodded. The both of you helped each other into the house, and you sat him down on one of the several cushions in the living area.
“Your arm,” he asked. “how bad is it?”
You shook your head. “Just really sore. I think she might have left a nasty bruise or two somewhere, but I won’t know yet.”
“Put one of the cloths in the pot with water and put it over the fire.” He told. “Take it out after a few minutes, let it rest for another, then put it on your shoulder. It should help.”
“Thank you.” You stood, doing so, saying. “I swore we had bandages somewhere. I’ll make something for you to drink too; I bought some herbs just last week.”
He nodded, not taking his eyes off of you as you worked. If it were any other man, you would have felt unsafe; yet, it was only Lucius.
Little by little that night, both of you helped heal one another.
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Half a year passed since that night, and you and Lucius had only grown closer. Perhaps as close as you could be with a man who was not your husband by choice.
Not much on the farm had changed; you two were living comfortably, and happily, almost making all the turmoil from the first year worth it. The both of you decided to make more visits to Atticus and Diana’s home, realizing just how much you both missed having someone to talk to outside of each other; but that did not mean you had to keep things hidden of course.
If anything, you shared everything with each other.
So much so, that when Lucius asked you why you held onto him longer when he embraced you on your birthday, you told him the truth.
“I don’t want every time we touch to be when it is in turmoil.” You explained, growing meeker. “And I…I’ve missed the feeling of it when it has not been forced upon me.”
Lucius stared at you with a look you had never seen from him. He had been gentle with you many a times, but they way his eyes fell into yours…
He took a step closer to you, and when you showed no sign of discomfort, he took your face into his hands. Your eyes shut at the feeling of him, and he pressed his head against yours. Never in your life had someone’s breath upon your skin feel so immaculate.
From there on out, it always seemed like you had to have a hand on each other one way or another.
It started with holding hands whenever walking through the city together. He used to ‘lead’ you through the crowds in the past, but more so with a hand hovering over your back. No, him holding your hand meant he would have to go where you would go if anything were to happen.
Alongside this, he’d reach over and hold it at Atticus and Diana’s house; whether it was during dinner, or simply just talking. The eldest child had said what the rest of the household had been thinking.
“They’re finally acting like they’re married!”
Because even when there were no other eyes besides yours, he would still hold your hand. You wonder if it ever became a way for Lucius to ground himself; because it certainly did for you.
You hugged him more often as well. Those used to be for ‘substantial’ occasions; those being celebrations or heartbreaks. Now, they were incorporated into greetings and goodbyes. Of course, it only took a few weeks before they were than made into simple desires.
He would be cooking dinner, and you would come beside him to embrace him. You would be gathering eggs from the chickens, and he would wait for you to set the basket down before tossing his arms around you.
At night, it was normal for you both to trade spots as one of you would read a story, and the other would have their head in the other’s lap.
This happened on so many occasions, it shouldn’t have come as a surprise for what Lucius proposed next, but it did.
“If you don’t favor the question I’m about to ask you, then you are allowed to never speak to me again.” He said, his feet hanging off the arm of the lecti couch you both bought that year.
“Well,” you scoffed, sitting on the end of it. “I will have to speak to you again because we live together.”
“Would you want to sleep in my room tonight?” Never in your life had you thought that would have been his question. When you didn’t speak right away, he backtracked. “I don’t expect you to. I understand if-.”
“-The nights are growing colder.” You stated, no visible uneasiness. “I’ve noticed it, and I don’t think any number of blankets could warm me.”
He swallowed thickly, and this was perhaps one of the first times you’d ever seen him like this. “Yes…it’s cold.”
You nodded, and another beat of silence fell between you two. Standing up, you tugged at the seams of your dress. “I-I’ll go change.”
“Yes,” he sat up. “I shall as well.”
Disappearing into your room, you tossed your day clothes off then slipped on a nightdress. After pacing around the floor for a few moments, you gathered the courage to go out into the hall and knock on Lucius’ door.
It was opened as if he was standing right behind it.
He wore just a plain, tattered tunic, and said nothing; yet, you caught his eyes run down you before immediately bringing them back to your face. You were not even in his room yet, and already your body grew warmer.
“May I come in?” You asked.
“Yes, of course.” He stepped aside and you entered.
Somehow, you were no longer man and wife; you were two people who had just discovered a strange, yet burning, feeling that you both held for one another. A feeling that you were both afraid to say aloud…because then it would be real.
The only light in his room was from the moon just peeking through the curtain of his one window. Looking around, you saw that it was still just the bare minimum; a bed, a small table beside it with a lamp, and a dresser. The only others things of note were his sword leaning against the wall, and just a few dirty clothes on the floor.
“I-I tried to clean before you came.” He mentioned.
“Is the rest under the bed?” You asked.
He chuckled. “Yes.”
Before you could change your mind, you pulled the covers off one side of the bed and slid under them. Glancing behind at Lucius, you saw him wear a look where you knew he wanted to say something.
“What is it?” You asked.
“That’s usually the side I sleep on but-.”
You rolled over to the other side. “Are you content now?”
He wheezed, moving to his designated side, slipping under the covers. “Very.”
“Good.” You smiled up at him.
His own mouth lowered as you could see him thinking. He then said. “I don’t expect us to do anything.”
You watched as his eyes dropped from you, as if it was too invasive just to merely look. Thinking from only your heart, you scooted closer, resting your hand on his arm. You ran your fingers up and down his muscles, but then guided his arm to wrap around your waist.
“Okay?”
He hummed, pulling you just a little closer. “Yes.”
“And we’ll just lay together?” You whispered. “Nothing else?”
“Nothing else.”
And that’s what you did. The compete truth was that you would caress him only to remind yourself that it was Lucius and not Geta. His arms, his back, his face…he was nothing like him.
After a few more nights, you told him that as you both lay awake, unable to sleep. He had pulled you on top of him that night, saying that you could see his face better in the moonlight. You only giggled, hiding your face in his chest; even that was too much for you.
It was easier to tell each other things in the darkness. You always knew that, but with being in the same bed (you had not gone back to your room for a week), the words flowed out of both your mouths.
“After my father died,” you said one night as you laid on your side facing him. “I would stroke my own hair or even my arms and pretend they were someone else’s. Even when I was with Geta.”
Lucius stared at you, then immediately began to caress your cheek. You shut your eyes, sighing at the feeling.
“I never thought I’d be able to sleep next to another woman again.” He whispered.
“And now?” You looked into his eyes.
He stopped his movements, but did not remove his hand. You watched every part of him. How his chest heaved shallowly, his arms tensing ever so slightly, but his eyes…gods his eyes. They were heavy as they looked at you; a look that made your heart flutter and not shutter.
Swallowing your fear, you sat up and inched closer to him. Your face hovered above his, and your breath heated his skin. His hand continued to trace shapes about your cheek, and shutting your eyes, you placed your lips upon his.
It was the gentlest kiss you ever shared with a man.
You had pulled away, dreading to see how he felt. When your eyes befell his gentle smile, and his other hand came up to cup your face, you kissed him again.
And again, and again, and again.
You climbed upon his lap without pulling your lips away from him, wrapping your arms around his neck. He sat up, his own arm encircling your waist and drawing you impossibly closer.
Lucius parted from you, and as you whined at the loss of his lips, they soon settled upon your cheek, and then your jaw, and then your chin. Your heavy pants turned to soft grunts as he kissed down your neck, his mustache scratching your skin in just the right way.
Your hands settled into his hair the lower he traveled, moving your night gown off your shoulder to kiss your collarbone. You felt yourself becoming intoxicated from him, and only then noticed you had been for a while.
Oh, how you wished you could bottle up his laugh, his strength, his stubbornness, and get drunk every night. His kisses only added fuel to the fire that was your desire for him.
He sunk his teeth into your skin, and your body, once enflamed, ran cold.
“No!” You tore yourself from his lap, nearly falling off the bed.
Lucius said your name, leaning forward on instinct but soon stopped once he saw you crawl away. “I’m sorry.”
You opened your mouth, but nothing came out. All you knew was that you needed to go, so you did. Cradling yourself in your arms, you got up from his bed, rushing out of his room and into yours.
You half expected him to knock on the door, then, when you wouldn’t answer, him yell and curse you before breaking it down. Yet nothing of the sort happened. You heard his own door open, and you saw his shadow on the other side, but he did not touch your door. He left after a moment of waiting.
When his own door shut, did you finally cry.
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You told yourself that night, you would wake up far earlier than Lucius would so you simply wouldn’t have to see him.
When you awoke, you did the exact opposite. You laid in your bed, trying to return to sleep, only to be forced to lie in the dark. The sun rose into your room, and you heard Lucius’ door open. Still, you did not get up.
It was quite comedic, actually. With your door still shut, he knew you were still home. How he tried his best to keep quiet for you, yet his footsteps had always been heavy, the front door had always creaked, and you could always hear him cursing under his breath every time.
When you knew he had left the house, that was when you stood from your bed, slipping on your sandals. You didn’t bother changing out of your nightdress, leaving your room, and then the house.
Lucius was amongst the chickens when he saw you. He didn’t bother hiding the surprise upon his face at the sight of you. You walked to him until there was little space between you.
“Last night-.”
You took his hand from his side, placing it upon your face. He rubbed your cheek with his thumb as if it was natural. Kissing the palm of his hand, you trailed it down to your clothed breast. He breathed your name with hesitance, but you shushed him. You held his hand there, not taking your eyes off him.
“I will show you, one day.” You told him. “I will show you the mark Geta had made. The one where I myself can scarcely see it, yet I know that it haunts me. But now…” You brought your other hand up to his face, tracing your thumb over his lip. “I just want you to understand.”
He kissed the pad of your thumb, nodding. You embraced him, and he held you with both gentleness and ferocity. The rest of the day carried on as normal, yet you aided him with the chores on the farm.
You went to bed with him that night, but it was the first time he did not entrap you in his arms. You knew he was still afraid of hurting you, but you would be a liar if you said you weren’t thankful for the space.
Still, he would feel your touch every day; whether it was something as small as brushing his hand, or as substantial as kissing his cheek.
As the both of you lay awake one night, you played with the sleeve of his tunic.
“Could I lie on top of you?” You asked.
Lucius looked over at you, nodding. “You never need to ask.”
“I want to.” You climbed on top of him, straddling his lap. “I never want to force you to do anything.”
His eyes fell to your hips before returning them to your face. “I’ll tell you if I wish to not do something. I hope you know you can as well.”
“I do. Would you like to touch me?”
“Where do you want me to touch you?”
You moved his hands to your hips, which he held firmly, yet not enough to hurt you. You leaned down so your lips touched his.
“No teeth.” You said.
“No teeth.” He repeated.
Lucius sighed into your mouth as you kissed. Despite how you were on top of him, the kiss was sweet, shy even. When you pulled away, you trailed your lips from his cheek to his ear.
“Do you dream about me?” You rasped.
He said nothing, and you continued to kiss every part of his face besides his lips.
“It’s okay.” You kissed his Adam’s Apple. “I want you too.”
“Yes.” His breath hitched.
“What was I doing in your favorite one?” You kissed his pulse point.
“You,” he breathed sharply through his nose. “you’re touching yourself.”
“Would that please you?” You sat up in somewhat surprise, resting your hands on his chest. “To watch me do so?”
He shook his head. “I want to do what pleases you.”
It felt foreign to hear someone say they want you to feel good. Instead of cowering from it, you faced it head on. You kneeled for a moment, hiking your gown up to your hips before sitting back on your ankles,  exposing yourself to him. Lucius’ jaw clenched at the sight of your naked center, and he drew his hands away from your hips, falling them into fists upon the mattress.
“I wish to watch you as you watch me.”
Without looking away from you, he drew his hand down to his cock, pulling it out from under his tunic. Your eyes grew just a hint. There was no doubt upon him being more well-endowed than others, but it was still different from how you imagined.
Shutting your eyes, you trailed your fingers over your cunt, your thumb playing with your clit. The sounds of Lucius’ smothered grunts, and the skin of his cock on his fingers only added to your pleasure. Digging deeper and moving faster, you felt a coil within your stomach tighten when you opened your eyes and saw as Lucius’ gaze bore into yours.
Light moans escaped your lips as your hips moved with a mind of their own, watching the man beneath you take pleasure from his own hand. It was him chanting your name like a prayer that sent you over the edge. With your eyes shut, the coil within you snapped, and pleasure filled your veins.
Not long after, you felt a warmth coat your nightdress. Opening your eyes, you looked down and saw the white-hot residue of Lucius’ release. Your gaze drew to his cock, still clutched in his hand, yet red with droplets of white running over his knuckles.
You don’t know what possessed you to, but you lowered your mouth down to clean him with your tongue.
“Gods be good!” He huffed, laughing your name.
“What?” You wiped your mouth.
 “You’re going to be the death of me.”
Grinning like the devil, you slid off the bed, walking towards the door. “I hope it’s a pleasant one then.”
He sat up. “Where are you going?”
“To change. You dirtied me as well.” You teased.
“Take one of my tunics from the dresser.”
It almost made you laugh that he didn’t want you to leave for even a second. You opened the top drawer, grabbing the longest tunic you could find before facing him. “Close your eyes.”
He laid on his side, putting a pillow over his head. Many would find it strange how the both of you would see the most intimate parts of yourself while doing one of the most intimate acts together, yet you didn’t want him to see you naked.
But Lucius never thought of it as strange. He knew what you had been through, and never once judged you.
When you were clothed, you slid into bed, wrapping your arms around his body and pressing a quick kiss to the back of his neck.
“You’re a good man, Lucius Verus Aurelius.” You whispered. “I will tell you that until the day you die, or when you finally believe me.”
He squeezed your hand, relaxing into your touch. You never slept so peacefully until that night.
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You always had to see him whenever he would touch you so intimately. There would be nights where there was only a single candle in the room as he trailed his hand up your thigh whilst you sat on his lap.
His fingers were too much for you at first, but he never ridiculed you. When you whimpered at the feeling, he retracted them, kissing your eyes. You asked him again to try, and he whispered praises into your hair as the pain from a dry spell soon turned into pleasure.
It was usually at night did these moments of exploration occurred. In the day, the most you would ever do was kiss. That is, until the first time you cut his hair since the discovery of feelings.
“I don’t want to get hair on your floor.” Lucius said as he sat on the floor, leaning his back against the foot of your bed. It was hotter than sin that day. He wore nothing but a loincloth, but that barely did anything to help him from the heat. You wore essentially a thin shift that would usually be under your dress; yet again, because of the heat, that was all you wore.
You sat on the bed, legs draped over his shoulders as you cut his hair. “It’s your floor too. You built the house.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I haven’t slept here for a while now. Besides, I will clean up.”
“I had no idea you favored doing domestic work now.” He turned and pressed a kiss to your knee.
You slapped the back of his head. “Don’t move! I’ll give you a bald spot if you do so again.”
“Yes, my mistress of the house.” He joked.
“You’re horrible.”
“You just told me I was a good man not so long ago.”
“And I can just as easily revoke that title.”
He stayed silent the rest of the time, but not from any underlining anger. Simply from his at ease posture, you knew he was smiling.
He smiled more those days.
When you were finished, you tossed your scissors aside, but Lucius’ hands settled upon your thighs, not allowing you to get up. You scoffed.
“What is it?”
He turned to face you, kneeling up to meet you. “I wish to try something, but only if you wish it as well.”
You rose your brow, but smiled, kissing his nose. “It will be difficult if I do not know what it is.”
Without drawing his eyes away from yours, he slid his hands up your thighs, bringing the bottom of your shift with it. It seemed normal at first, but once he lowered his mouth, your chest tightened.
“What are you doing?” You asked.
“I want to kiss you there.” His breath caressed your cunt and you mewled at the feeling. “I think you’ll enjoy it, but we don’t have to.”
Your heart changed from beating in fear, to then in anticipation. You loved how he kissed your lips, and every inch of your skin that was not covered, what would it feel like to have his lips there?
Kissing the top of his head, you laid on your elbows, nodding.
“Let me hear you say it.” He nosed the inside of your thigh.
“Yes.” You sighed. “Please.”
He lowered his mouth back down, pressing the lightest of kissed onto your center. You groaned through shut lips, only for them to part open as the hairs of his mustache tickled you whilst he began to lap at your wetness.
Tossing your head back, you sat up, running your hands through his hair, unconsciously rolling your hips to meet his mouth. His groan reverberated through your body, only adding to the pleasure you were feeling.
“Lucius, Lucius,” you babbled his name until it didn’t sound like a word.
His nose bumped against your aching clit the same time his tongue penetrated your cunt. You yelped as that familiar, tightening feeling swept over you. His half-lidded eyes would stare up at you every once in a while, as he would continue to drink from you as if he had been stranded in the desert. Just as you were on the brink of release, you drew him away from you.
“What-what is it?” He huffed. “What’s wrong?”
You shook your head, pressing your lips to his before scooting further up the bed. With one last breath, you pulled your shift over your head, revealing your bare body to him. His gaze ran over your figure unashamedly.
“Come here.” You beckoned.
He crawled onto the bed and over your body, yet still looked at your face. You took his hand and laid it over your breast. His body ran cold at what was on the side of it. A bite mark.
“He branded me all those years ago.” You confessed. “And it has not left since.”
Geta…
You ran your hand up his chest. “I love you, and I trust you with every part of my body. I need you to know that.”
“I love you.” He echoed, pressing the tenderest of kisses to the mark and you gasped lightly. “I have for so long now; I…I need you.”
“Then have me.”
He sat back on his knees, unwrapping his loin cloth and tossing it to the floor. Precum leaked from his sweltering cock as it stood upright like a pillar. You crawled over, kissing every inch of his face and climbing into his lap. He drew his arms around your waist, his finger tracing circles into the small of your back.
“I don’t know how long I will last.” He puffed heavily. “It’s been so long.”
“I just want you inside of me.” You kissed his jaw, taking his cock into your hand and sinking down onto it. It had been a while for you too, and while you were soaked, it was not enough to completely subside the tightness. “Just…wait.”
“I could die happy if all you wanted was for me to remain still as you’re above me.” He said into your ear.
You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, sinking your nails into his skin because that was the only way to remind you that he was still there. The further you sunk down on him, the easier and more pleasureful you felt.
“I’m going to move now.” You said into his shoulder, and you did.
Slowly, at first you relished in the quiet slapping of skin and the breath moans leaving both you and Lucius’ lips. He trailed a syrupy line of kisses down your throat until he bowed his head to place them upon your chest.
“Your name,” Lucius said into your skin. “tell me your name.”
You gave him a look as you rolled your hips into his, yet sighed your name.
“Again.” He breathed, latching his lips around the tip of your breast.
You did.
“Again.” He kissed the hollow of your throat.
You leaned into his touch, saying your name a third time.
He repeated your given name, than following it with ‘Aurelias’. Your movements stilled, yet he did not care.
“You are the most cunning woman I have met, and you are my wife.” He stated, never looking away from you. Tears sprang to your eyes when you saw the same for him, and you gave him a messy kiss before resuming faster this time.
After months of being called a name that did not belong to you, especially whenever in the bedroom, Lucius was doing everything to remind you that you were yourself again as you felt pleasure.
It felt as if, after two years, ‘Julia’ was finally gone.
You chanted his name as if it was your favorite prayer, burying your hands in his hair and kissing his lips.
“Lucius, Lucius, Lucius…”
Because, just like you, how long had it been since his true name was uttered whilst in the throes of pleasure?
He moaned into your mouth, holding onto you tighter. You squealed when he rose up onto his knees, latching your legs around his waist and only crying out sharply when your throbbing clit ran across his pubic hair.
“Come on, come on,” he urged into your ear. “I know you can give it to me.”
“Lu-Lu-!” You moaned, running your nails over the thick field of muscles that was his back.
He said your name over and over again, until it was one word that was the end of you.
“Please.”
You came with your vision blinded from the state of euphoria you had reached. Lucius still held you above him even as his legs began to quake, bouncing you on his cock. You felt as though you were suspended in air when his groans stammered, and you felt strings of his cum paint the walls of your cunt.
Slowly, he lowered the two of you onto the mattress, laying you on your back like you were the most precious treasure in the world. You kept your legs around his waist, breathing with him with your chests glued together from your sweat.
“Lucius-.” You began, trying to shift under him.
“-Just,” he grunted. “just another moment. Please.”
How could you deny him? Every kiss he gave was loving as he laid upon you. His cock had grown soft, and even you were aware that you could’ve fallen asleep if you weren’t careful.
When he pulled away from you, you let out an involuntary whine.
“I thought you wanted me to get off you?” He kissed your stomach when he stood up.
You shoved him playfully. “Just clean me up and come back.”
“So controlling.”
Still, he did what you asked, bringing a soaked washcloth from the bathroom and cleaning you. You groaned out of both the cold water hitting your hot skin, and the heat from the air itself.
“We should’ve waited until night.” You whined.
“Why?”
“I’m suffocating from the air outside!”
Lucius hummed, tossing the washcloth aside and looming over you. “Then that forces us to wear nothing today, so that we might cool down.”
You nodded. “Perhaps you aren’t as feeble minded as I thought.”
He settled behind you, tossing an arm over your waist and pulling your back to his chest. Even though his cock pressed against you, the two of you were completely exhausted from the heat of the day’s work, and the heat of what took place only moments before.
The only sound was that of the cicadas singing in the summertime. Sometimes, a breeze or two of wind would bounce the curtain off the window, but for the most part, just the even breathing you shared with Lucius was all you could hear.
Lucius’ mustache rubbed your skin when he placed a kiss to your neck. “What’s going on inside of your mind right now?”
You grinned. “A proper wife would say that I was thinking of you.”
“But that’s not what it is.”
“It’s something that has nothing to do with anything of note.”
He squeezed you. “Spit it out, woman.”
Sighing, you felt a sense of dread in your heart; both for your thoughts, and also how your husband would react. So, you tried your best to explain it.
“Do you even wonder how you will be remembered?” You began. “Spoken from mouths? Written in books? Painted on walls? They’ll remember Lucius, the Lost Son, the Last Gladiator…What will they remember of me, if anything? Rome’s Cleopatra? Her Delight? A whore to the twin emperors? I like to fantasize that they will name me the first woman who sat upon the emperor’s throne, even if it was as the last of its consul. Yet, even if they name me…I will be Julia. The name of a slave, the name I only accepted when he would press me into the bed so roughly. I only survived because I would need to tell myself that he was doing all of it to Julia, not to me.”
It felt quieter in that room, even though the sounds outside did not cease. Lucius gently turned your body towards him, and he stroked your face with the back of his hand.
“You’re crying,” he uttered your name, frowning.
You wiped your eyes, wanting to hide from him. Yet, he did not allow it, pulling your hands away from you and wrapping them around his shoulders.
“Would you wish I remain silent, or share with you what is in my head?” He asked.
“Talk to me.” You answered.
“I never cared of what history would see of me.” He stated. “Even as a boy. I know that we are different in most aspects of life, but I believe it serves no one to wonder away how we will be viewed long after we are dead. I do not care if or what a stranger thinks of me in a lifetime later. I care how Atticus and Diana see me. I care what their children think. Above all, I care of what you see me to be.”
You pressed your head against his. “You’re pigheaded and quite foolish sometimes.”
“And it matters you say that.” He pulled you closer. “Because that is what you will tell others when I pass on.”
“You know I don’t think that is all you are.” You remined him.
“I do.” He nodded. “I will know you for your wit, and your protective nature, and your kindness.”
“I never truly thought of myself as kind.” You gave a pained smile.
“That is how I see you.” He kissed your brow. “And what I will say with my last dying breath.”
You wondered how such a man as himself could exist at the same time you did. A man who hated you prior to everything yet laid with you in bed. A man who treated you with a tenderness you never thought possible.
A man who could be the last person on earth with you, and you would only feel at peace.
You did not need to say anything to him. Simply by the innocent smile that spread across your lips, did he know. You fell into the most comfortable of silences together as you laid naked in the summer heat.
The both of you were lost to time as we all shall be one day.
Perhaps you lived on that farm for the rest of your days, or perhaps you moved to a different land.
Perhaps you had ten children, perhaps you had only one, or perhaps you had none and were content with each other’s company.
Perhaps you died before him, perhaps he died before you, or perhaps you both passed onto the Elysian fields together.
All that truly matters, at the end of all things, is the life the two of you led together, and what you and loved ones remembered the most of it.
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evilkitten3 · 1 year ago
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sasuke: u did nothing wrong
itachi: hey it's actually really fucking concerning that you think that. i was objectively a horrible brother and the fact that i loved you the whole time secretly doesn't change that. i did what i thought was right but that doesn't make it any less fucked up, and you definitely didn't deserve it. i failed to treat you like a person with your own thoughts and beliefs and instead tried to push my own agenda on you. i traumatized you more than anyone else, and i did most of it knowingly and purposefully. you don't owe me gratitude or forgiveness or anything else. just know that i love you no matter what and i hope you can find happiness in spite of what i did to you.
people with incredible reading comprehension just phenomenal abilities to comprehend the reading: why sassgay not gargle leaf balls
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i always forget about this scene, where itachi refutes the fact that he made the right choice regarding the massacre.
(even though he still identifies as itachi of konohagakure because the will of fire i mean brainwashing is too strong)
no matter how much itachi loved sasuke, he manipulated him, just like how the village manipulated itachi. the fact is that the rot cycles back to konoha.
#naruto#naruto shippuden#uchiha sasuke#sasuke was right#i love itachi but he was a pos and he was aware of it#kinda nuts to me that people try to act like itachi was a good person when even itachi never tried to do that#at no point did itachi go ''and this is why i'm winning the world's best brother award. sasuke are you listening''#itachi became a monster - and he was a tragic monster to be very clear a 12/13yo being pushed into genocide is tragic - but he knew that#he wasn't unaware of what he'd done. he just didn't realize how badly he'd fucked up his own plans#when he talked to naruto after his revival he got a huge wake-up call about it#i think learning of sasuke's new goal was the turning point for itachi's character (posthumously but still)#he never got a chance to unlearn everything bc. he was dead. but he did realize that he'd fucked up big time#and he knew he owed sasuke an apology. and more than that he owed him what he'd spent so long denying him: honesty#itachi's lies and manipulations made sasuke into the person he is. but itachi realized that didn't mean he got to try and 'fix' him#it just meant that he'd fucked up. and he demonstrates that newfound understanding by giving sasuke the truth and trusting him with it#''no matter what you do from now on i will always love you'' was for both of them#sasuke so he could know that he didn't need to live his life around itachi. and itachi so he could show his growth as a (dead) person#i love them so much#itachi saying ''no. i was shitty. don't make excuses for me'' was something i think sasuke really needed to hear
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requiemforthepoets · 1 month ago
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en garde! 𖦹 CL16
PAIRINGS: charles leclerc x fencer!leclerc!reader , f1 grid x fencer!leclerc!reader
SUMMARY: charles had been asking you to teach him fencing, and you finally did.
REMINDERS: this is purely fiction, the way how the character is portrayed in my story does not reflect the person that is portraying my character in real life. always separate fiction from reality, and do not repost or copy my work in any way.
WARNINGS: smau mixed with narrations, inconsistent photos, typos, not proofread, cursing, no use of y/n on the narrations, poorly google translated italian, and all photos are taken from pinterest
FACE CLAIMS: all from pinterest
WORD COUNT: 4.5k
AUTHOR’S NOTE: it’s been a long time since i added a new fic to my leclerc!sister series, so here it is hehe sorry, i’ve yapped a LOT about fencing on the narration part, so pls forgive me 😭 i hope i didn’t bore you a lot with fencing stuff 😭 i’m also accepting request for this series (i’m running out on ideas lmao 🥲) but i hope that you’ll enjoy this one!
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ynleclerc
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liked by charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend, sofia_rossi, marcoromano.fencing, landonorris and 783,984 others
ynleclerc E' passato un po' di tempo, Italia 💘
view all 12,837 comments
charles_leclerc when are you coming home?
ynleclerc idk, why?
charles_leclerc are you serious right now 😐
ynleclerc what…🧍🏻‍♀️
charles_leclerc check my messages for once 😐
username1 OH HOW I MISSED YOU 😭
username2 the y/n drought has finally ended!!!! 😭
username3 MOTHER IS BACK, MOTHER HAS POSTED 😭🎉
landonorris thank god you’re alive. i thought you’re already dead somewhere 😔💔
ynleclerc bro what 😭
landonorris anyways, when will you teach me how to fence for a new quadrant yt vid
ynleclerc you sure you’re up for it? don’t want you poking yourself with the foil
landonorris 😠😠😠😠
sofia_rossi CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!!
ynleclerc 🥰🥰🥰
username4 OUR FAV FENCING DUO IS GOING TO SEE EACH OTHER SOON??? OMG 😭❤️
francisca.cgomes you’re in italy and you didn’t even tell me? 😠
ynleclerc I FORGOT IM SORRY IM SORRY!! but hey, i’m italy 🥰 hangout soon?
francisca.cgomes of course!!! just text meeee!!
username5 SHE REMEMBERED HER PASSWORD 🥳
ynleclerc posted a story!
liked by charles_leclerc, sofia_rossi, yourbestfriend, francisca.cgomes, marcoromano.fencing and others
charles_leclerc when will you teach me fencing 😔
charles_leclerc can’t believe it’s so hard to schedule one with you 💔💔💔
charles_leclerc i need big brother privileges 💔
ynleclerc USHCJJSJD CHARLES 😭
ynleclerc i’ll be home by next week! (hopefully you’ll be home as well 🤥) damn, can’t believe our schedules never really align
charles_leclerc ❤️❤️❤️❤️
francisca.cgomes i’m free tomorrow!! how about we go out for brunch?
ynleclerc KIKAAAA!! yes yes, ofc! ❤️
francisca.cgomes YAY!!
username6 OUR FENCING DUO WILL BE REUNITED SOON 😭❤️
username7 oh we pray for times like this (you being active on ig 😔💔)
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MONACO
The sound of clashing blades echoed through the halls of the Club d’Escrime, a backdrop to your training session with Marco, your Italian coach. Fully suited in your white fencing uniform, mask tucked under your arm, you watched the double doors open, revealing your brother, Charles and his videographer, Antoine. The latter already had his camera rolling, and Charles, in his usual casual style—jeans, a dark hoodie, and white sneakers, looking like he had just stepped off a magazine cover.
“Finally!” You said, walking towards them with a smile. “Thought you’d never make it.”
Charles chuckled, spreading his arms in mock exasperation. “Don’t start! You’re the one who’s always impossible to catch. What is it this week? Tokyo? Budapest?”
“Home, for once,” you replied with a laugh, gesturing around the salle. “But that’s rare, as you know.”
“The place is very stunning,” Charles said, as he marveled the interior of the salle. “So this is where gold medals are made?” He teased.
“Something like that,” you replied, your voice light with pride. “Though Marco here deserves half the credit.”
“Ah, Charles! Finalmente ci incontriamo,” Marco greeted, shaking Charles’ hand firmly. His thick Italian accent added a charm to his words. “Your sister talks about you a lot.”
“È un piacere finalmente conoscerti. Lei non parla mai di me quando vinco, però.” He joked, shooting a playful look your way.
“Not true, and you know it.” You rolled your eyes at the comment.
Marco laughed, patting Charles on the shoulder. “Well today, we’ll see if athletic talent runs in the family, sì?”
“Okay, so here we are at the Club d’Escrime in Monaco. This is where my sister trains—when she’s not winning Olympic gold, of course,” he said grinning at you and turning towards the camera.
“We’ve been planning this fencing lesson for many months now, but with her busy training schedule and my racing calendar, it’s been almost impossible to find a day that worked for both of us. So finally, today is the day!” Charles added.
“Did you mention how excited you’ve been?” You quipped, folding your arms.
Charles smirked. “I may have. But, let’s be honest, you’re probably more nervous than I am.”
“Nervous?” You scoffed. “Why would I be nervous? You’re the one holding a weapon for the first time.”
“Ah, but I’ve seen the movies,” he countered, mimicking a clumsy lunge. “How hard can it be?”
You laughed at his theatrics, shaking your head. “We’ll see how long that confidence lasts when Marco puts you through the warm-up.”
“Speaking of which,” Marco interjected, “shall we start soon? Time is short, and I want to see if he can last more than five minutes.”
“You’re in for a workout.” You teased and smiled.
Charles gave an exaggerated sigh but could not hide his amusement. “Great. I love being underestimated.”
“You’re about to learn that fencing isn't as easy as people make it look on TV.” You smiled at the camera.
“Or tiktok.” Charles quipped, earning a chuckle from Marco.
You gestured towards the piste. “Alright, let’s get you geared up. I don’t want to hear any excuses later.”
Once Charles was all suited up, he stepped onto the piste, fully suited in his borrowed fencing gear, and you couldn’t help but pause. There was something striking about the way the jacket, breeches, and long socks suited him. The silver sheen of the lamé, a metallic vest worn over the jacket for scoring, added an almost regal touch. You smirked as you took in the sight of your brother adjusting his gloves.
“Oh my god. I’ve never looked so good.” Charles said as he came out all suited up.
“Would you look at that,” you began, folding your arms. “Hate to admit it, but you look good. Maybe too good.”
Charles glanced up, clearly amused. “Oh? Surprised your brother cleans up well?”
“I’m just saying, if this racing thing doesn’t work out, you might have a future as a fencer. Imagine, Charles Leclerc, Olympic Champion.” You gave him an exaggerated once-over. “The gear suits you.”
“I mean, I do look the part.” He smiled, striking a mock fencing pose, which was more comedic than impressive.
“You do,” you admitted with a laugh. “But let’s see if you can move like a fencer before you start planning your second career.”
“Basta con i complimenti. Time for the warm-up! No excuses later when your legs start complaining.” Marco smiled.
Charles groaned playfully, shooting you a mock glare. “Leg day already gets me in the gym. Don’t let him overdo it.”
“Stop whining,” you teased, motioning for him to follow Marco. “You’ll thank him when you’re not limping tomorrow.”
“We begin easy,” he said, demonstrating a forward bend. “Touch your toes, Charles. Keep your legs straight.”
“Easy for you to say,” he muttered, glancing at Marco, who was effortlessly folding himself in half.
“Come on, Charlie. You can’t lose to a guy twenty years older than you.” You chuckled from the sidelines, standing near Antoine, who was filming the entire thing.
“Thanks for the encouragement,” Charles quipped, finally managing to graze his toes. “I see you’re enjoying this too much.”
“I am.” You admitted, voice light with laughter.
Next were lunges, which Charles did with ease, his form surprisingly precise. “Now these, I can handle. We do this in the gym all the time.”
“Good. Now arm extensions, long and controlled. Think of reaching for the target.” Charles mirrored Marco’s movements, extending his arms fluidly.
You couldn’t resist teasing, “not bad, Charles. Maybe you’re a natural after all.”
“Maybe I am,” he replied, smirking. “See? I’ve got this.”
“Next is jumping jacks,” Marco interrupted, clearly amused by your banter.
Charles transitioned smoothly into the exercise, his movements energetic and practiced. As he worked through the routine, Charles suddenly turned to you, his tone curious.
“Why don’t we ever train together? Seems like it could be fun.” Charles glanced at you.
“Because you’d complain the whole time.” You laughed, shaking your head.
“Hey, I don’t complain that much.” He argued, clearly offended.
You just laughed at him, waving a hand dismissively. “Fencing is my thing, Charlie. I need to focus when I’m training, it’s not all fun and games.”
“And today isn’t serious?” Charles raised a brow, pausing mid-jumping jack.
“Not really,” you admitted with a shrug. “Today’s more about proving to you that fencing isn’t as easy as it looks.”
“Good luck with that,” he said, clearly amused. “You forget who you’re talking to.”
“Charles,” Marco interjected, a mischievous glint in his eye, “your sister has a gold medal, she might surprise you.”
“I don’t doubt that,” he said sincerely, before his grin returned. “But I’m still confident I can keep up.”
“That’s the spirit!” You smiled.
”The floor is yours, campionessa.” Marco smiled as he stepped back, and gestured for you to take over.
“Alright,” you turned to Charles. “Let’s start with the basics. This is going to be your crash course in fencing, everything you need to know before you touch the blade.”
Antoine, still filming, zoomed in on Charles’ face as he nodded, looking serious. “I’m ready, let’s hear it.”
“Fencing is one of the oldest sports in the world. It dates back centuries, originally used in dueling and combat training, but over time, it became more of a sport.” You explained. “In fact, fencing has been part of the Olympics since the very first modern games in 1896.”
“1896?” Charles repeated, very intrigued. “So, it’s been around forever.”
“Pretty much,” you confirmed with a smile. “Since then, it’s evolved into three distinct disciplines—foil, sabre, and epee. Each had different rules, strategies, and weapons. That’s what makes fencing so fascinating, you’re not just swinging a sword around. It’s a mind game as much as a physical one, that’s why some call it physical chess.”
Charles tilted his head, clearly interested. “What’s the difference between the three?”
“Come on, let me show you guys.” You walked over to a nearby rack, where several swords were neatly displayed, each one gleaming under the salle’s lights.
“This is a foil.” You picked up a foil, you held it up for him and the viewers to see. “It is the lightest of the three weapons, weighing about 500 grams, and the one I use. Foil fencing focuses on precision and technique, the target area is only the torso, and points are scored with the tip of the blade.”
Charles reached out, and you handed him the foil. He tested the weight of the blade, lifting and lowering it.
“It’s lighter than I thought.” He admitted, giving it a small swing.
“Foils are meant for agility and speed,” you explained. You then picked up a sabre, slightly heavier with a distinct curved guard. “This is a sabre. It’s a bit heavier, and the rules are very different. In sabre, you can score with the edge of the blade, not just the tip, and target area is the upper body—above the waist, including arms and head.”
“Sounds aggressive,” Charles remarked, running his hand along the blade’s flat edge.
“Oh, it is,” you chuckled. “Sabre is all about speed and attack. It’s fast-paced, almost like a sprint compared to foil’s more calculated, chess-like style.”
“And the last one?” Charles asked, pointing to the remaining weapon.
“This is the epee,” you said as you picked up the epee, handing it to him. “It’s the heaviest of the three, about 775 grams, and the target area is the entire body, head to toe. But in epee, there’s no right of way, whoever hits first, scores.”
Charles tested the epee in his grip, nodding thoughtfully. “So it’s more…straightforward?”
“In a way, yes,” you said, setting the sabre and foil back on the rack. “But it can also lead to longer matches since there’s no restriction on who can attack when, you need all the patience you can get when playing epee.”
The camera panned as you gestured for Charles to follow you back to the piste. “Now, let’s talk about the rules. In foil, which is what we’ll be learning today, the target area is just the torso. No arms, legs, and head. If you hit anywhere else, it doesn’t count.”
“Got it,” Charles said. “What about the scoring?”
“In foil, we use something called right of way. It means that the fencer who initiates the attack has priority. If the other fencer wants to score, they have to defend or parry first, and then counterattack.”
You picked up a foil and demonstrated, lunging forward in a quick, fluid motion. “For example, if I attack you like this, you can’t just hit me back. You’d need to block my blade first.”
“So, it’s not just about being faster, it’s about timing.” Charles frowned slightly, absorbing the information.
“Yup,” you said, impressed. “It’s about strategy and reading your opponent’s moves. Now, there are also some practical rules. The piste, the one we are standing on right now, is 14 meters long and 1.5 to 2 meters wide. If you step off, you lose ground or even a point, and you can’t use your off-hand to block, and obviously, no overly aggressive moves like charging into your opponent.”
Charles raised a brow. “No tackling allowed? Shame.”
“Not unless you want to get a penalty.” You laughed, shaking your head. “Lastly, to win a match, you have to reach a predetermined number of points, usually 15, or have the highest score by the end of the time limit.”
“Okay, I’ll give you a quick demonstration of how right of way works in a tournament.” You gestured for Marco to join you, and he grabbed another foil, stepping into position, as Antoine adjusted his camera as you stepped back onto the piste.
“Watch closely,” you instructed as you and Marco faced off. “Marco will attack, and I’ll defend and counter.”
Marco lunged forward with a smooth attack, and you parried, your blades clashing with a satisfying ring before you swiftly riposted, your blade landing lightly on his torso.
Turning to Charles, you explained. “Since I defended first and then countered, I get the point. Make sense?”
Charles nodded slowly, his brows furrowed in thought. “So, if I just swing wildly, it’s useless unless I have priority.”
“Yes,” you said smiling. “Fencing isn’t about brute force, it’s about control, precision, and strategy.”
“This all felt like a masterclass,” Charles chuckled. “This is very incredible stuff.”
Once Charles had a solid grasp of the basic rules and ths purpose of fencing, you decided it was time to get into the technical aspects.
“Alrighty,” you began, pacing in front of him, foil in hand. “Before you can start attacking, you need to learn how to defend yourself. So, let’s talk about parrying.”
“There are four primary parries in fencing, and each one is important for blocking and setting yourself up for a counterattack.” You added.
Charles nodded, gripping the foil in his hand as if ready to jump in. “Alright, I’m listening. Hit me with it.”
“Not literally,” you teased, pointing your foil at him briefly before continuing. “First is parry four. This is your standard parry, used to block attacks aimed at your torso. You bring the blade across your body like this.”
You demonstrated, twisting your wrist and angling your blade so that the imaginary opponent’s strike would be deflected away. Charles mimicked the movement, though his hand was stiff, and his blade angle slightly off.
You leaned in, using the tip of your foil to adjust his blade position. “Loosen your wrist a bit, it’s all about control, not brute strength. The goal is to guide their blade away, not smack it out of their hands.”
“Okay, okay. Got it.” Charles said, trying again. This time, his movement was smoother.
“Better,” you said, stepping back. “Next is parry six. The one is similar to parry four, but instead of protecting the inside of your body, it covers the outside. Like this.” You executed the parry with ease, your blade moving in a fluid arc.
Charles tried to copy the movement, his blade wobbling slightly as he adjusted his wrist.
“Close,” you said, stepping closer. “But watch your wrist, it needs to stay firm, or you’ll lose control of your blade.” You tapped the back of his hand with your foil, and he adjusted accordingly.
“Parry eight is for low attacks to the outside of your body.” You continued, moving on, and crouching slightly, angling your blade downward to demonstrate. “This one is a little tricky because it requires good reflexes. You’re aiming to protect your lower torso and legs.” Charles gave it a go, though his stance was a bit too wide.
“Too much space,” you said, tapping his knee lightly with your blade. “Keep your movements controlled. The smaller the motion, the quicker you can recover.”
“This is harder than it looks.” Charles exhaled, looking at the camera as he adjusted his stance.
“That’s fencing for you,” you said with a grin. “Last one, parry seven. This one is similar to parry eight, but it protects the inside of your body instead of the ourside.”
You demonstrated the motion, and Charles followed suit, this time managing a relatively smooth movement.
“Good,” you said, stepping back. “Now, key things to remember when parrying—keep your blade pointed at your opponent at all times. It’s not just about blocking, it’s about setting yourself up for a counterattack. As soon as you’ve parried, you need to riposte, counterattack, immediately. If you wait too long, you’ll lose your advantage.”
Marco stepped forward, foil in hand, and you turned to Charles. “I’ll show you how it’s done.”
You squared off with Marco, and as he lunged forward with a mock attack, you parried effortlessly, your blade gliding against his and redirecting it away. In the same motion, you extended your arm, blade tip landing lightly on Marco’s torso.
“See how quick that was?” You said, turning to Charles. “It’s a fluid motion—parry and riposte, all in one go. No wasted movements.”
Charles nodded, his brows furrowed in concentration. “Alright, let me try.”
You stepped aside, letting Marco face Charles. As Marco slowly lunged, Charles attempted a parry, though his movement was slightly delayed, and his riposte lacked precision.
“Not bad,” you said encouragingly. “But don’t overthink it. The more natural it feels, the faster you’ll be.”
“Okay, let’s talk about stance,” you said, planting your feet firmly on the piste. “Your stance is your foundation, if it’s wrong, everything else falls apart.”
You demonstrated, keeping your feet shoulder-width apart, one foot pointing forward and the other at a slight angle.
“Your dominant hand is the one holding the foil. The non-dominant hand stays behind you, raised slightly for balance. So, which hand are you using?” You asked.
“Right.” Charles said, switching the foil to his dominant hand.
“Good,” you said. “Now, copy my stance.”
Charles mirrored your position, though his back foot was slightly out of place.
“Close, but—” you tapoed his leg lightly with your foil. “Your back foot needs to be at an angle, like this. Don’t forget to bend your knees slightly. You need to stay low for balance and quick movement.”
“Not bad,” you said, nodding approvingly when Charles adjusted his stance. “Now let’s work on movement. When you’re in your stance, you need to be able to move forward, backward, and side-to-side quickly withou losing your balance.”
You demonstrated, gliding forward and backward with small, controlled steps. “Notice how my feet stay the same distance apart, no matter where I go. That keeps me balanced and ready to attack or defend.”
Charles followed your lead, though his movements were a bit stiff.
“Relax,” you said, smiling. “You’re not marching in the military. It’s more like a dance, fluid and controlled.” He tried again, this time loosening up slightly.
“Better,” you said. “Now let’s add a lunge, the lunge is your main attacking move. From your stance, you push off your back leg and extend your front leg forward, like this.” You demonstrated, your movement smooth and precise. Charles attempted the motion, but his lunge was too short.
“Bigger step,” you said, tapping his front leg with your foil. “You want fo cover as much ground as possjble without overextending.” After a few tries, he managed a decent lunge.
“Not bad,” you said, stepping back. “You’re getting there. Now, let’s put it all together—stance, movement, parries, and lunges. You ready?”
Charles grinned, gripping his foil. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”
“Alright,” you said, picking up the body cord, “before we start, we need to get you all hooked up.”
Charles tilted his head, examining the cord. “What’s that for?”
“This is a body cord,” you explained, stepping closer to attach it to his fencing jacket. “It connects your weapon to the scoring system. When you land a valid touch, the electrical circuit completes, and the scoreboard registers the point.”
“So no sneaky hits?” He joked, watching closely as you secured it to his back and guided it through the sleeves of his jacket to attach to the foil.
“Not unless you want the referee to see it light up,” you quipped, making sure everything was in place before handing him a fencing mask. “Here, put this on.”
“For this first round, we’re keeping it simple, call it a trial run,” you said, rolling your shoulders and flexing your foil. “Marco will referee and keep things light. Just focus on getting comfortable.”
“Got it. Don’t go easy on me, though.” Charles raised his foil slightly, his excitement evident in his stance.
You laughed. “Trut me, Charles, I won’t.”
Marco stepped onto the side of the piste, holding a referee’s clicked in one hand. “Alright, trial run. I’ll call the touches. En garde!”
You and Charles took your positions at opposite ends of the piste, foils raised in salite before dropping into the en garde stance.
“Prêt? Allez!” Marco called, signaling the start of the bout.
Charles moved hesitant at first, testing his footing as he advanced. You let him come forward, observing his movements.
“Don’t forget your stance,” you reminded him, stepping back slightly. “Stay balanced.”
He nodded, adjusting his feet, and made a tentative lunge. Charles’ foil grazed your blade, missing the target area entirely.
“Close,” you said, countering with a light touch to his torso. Marco raised his hand. “Touch!”
Charles shook his head, laughing. “Okay, that was fast. Was that even one second?”
“Welcome to fencing,” you said with a grin. “It’s all about timing. Relax, though you’re doing fine.”
As the trial run continued, Charles began finding his rhythm. He landed his first touch on your shoulder, earing a quick ‘touch!’ from Marco.
“How does it feel?” You asked, stepping back for a brief pause.
Charles grinned under his mask. “Not bad! Are you nervous yet?”
“Me? Nervous?” You teased. “Cute. Let’s see how you handle the next round round.”
The second round began, and Charles was much more deliberate in his movements. He used the parries you had taught him, successfully blocking two of your attacks and landing another touch on your shoulder.
“Not bad, Lord Perceval,” you said, nodding as you reset your stance. “You’re learning quickly.”
“Of course,” he replied, his voice light with mock arrogance. “I’m a Leclerc. We adapt fast.”
By the end of the round, Marco called for a pause. “Alright, let’s use the scoreboard for the next one.”
“See this?” Marco said, pointing to the display. “Every valid touch will light up here with a beep. First to fifteen points wins.”
Charles noticed the screen, which displayed yor names, complete with small Monaco flags next to them.
“Wait, you personalized it?” He asked, laughing. “Now I feel like I’m in the Olympics.”
“Of course,” you said with a grin. “Nothing but the best for my big brother.”
Charles chuckled, lifting his foil again. As you adjusted your own, you bent the blade slightly, an action that caught his attention.
“Why are you doing that?” He asked.
“It’s something all fencers do,” you explained, holding the blade up for him to see. “Foils are flexible, and bending them ensures they’re in good condition and won’t snap. It also helps make the touches more accurate and less painful.”
“Huh,” Charles said, mimicking the motion with his own foil. “Interesting.”
“Alright, this is it,” you said, lowering your mask. “First to fifteen.”
Marco raised his hand. “En garde! Prêt? Allez!”
The boug began, and Charles quickly demonstrated his growing confidence. He moved fluidly, landing a few clean touches on your torso and arm. You could see his competitiveness kicking in, and you responded with sharper attacks, forcing him to parry and riposte.
Halfway through, the score was tied at 7-7, and the beeping sound of the scoreboard filled the room with each touch.
“You’re doing great.” You said during a brief pause.
“Thanks,” Charles replied, panting slightly. “But I’m not letting you win.”
“Good,” you said, resetting your stance. “Because I’m not letting you win, either.”
The intensity ramped up in the final stretch. Charles managed to land three more touches, bringing his total to ten, but you quickly countered with a series of precise attacks, pushing your score to fifteen.
Marco raised his hand as the final beep sounded. “Touché! Match for her—15 to 10!”
“Lifting your mask, you grinned at Charles, who pulled off his own mask, shaking his head in disbelief.
“That was incredible,” he said, still catching his breath. “I actually thought I had you for a moment there.”
“Well fought, champ! Ten points is impressive for a first timer, you did really great.” You said, resting your foil on your shoulder. “But I told you, fencing isn’t easy as it looks.”
Charles laughed, running a hand through his sweaty hair. “Yeah, no kidding. I think I’ll stick to racing.”
Marco, who had been observing with a smile, stepped in. “You were actually good for a beginner. You’re a fast learner, Charles. I’ve work with a lot of first-timers, and not many can pick up that quickly.”
“That’s true,” you chimed in nodding. “You were way better than I expected. Usually, people take ages to figure out how to lunge properly or keep their stance balanced.”
Charles’ grin widened. “Well, what can I say? It’s in my blood to be competitive.”
Marco laughed, clapping Charles on the shoulder. “You should come by more often during her trainings. You’d make a good parry partner.”
“Oh stop feeding his ego,” you said, rolling your eyes playfully. “It’s already huge.”
Charles gave a mock bow. “Keep it coming, Marco. I’m soaking it all in.”
Marco just smiled as the camera zoomed in on you both as he continued. “Not, really, Charles. If you’re free diring off-season, you should consider it. You’d give her a good challenge, and it would keep her on her toes.”
“Hmm…” Charles leaned on his foil again, pretending to consider the offer. “Fencing during off-season. I might actually think about that.”
You laughed. “Sure, if you can handle beaten every time.”
“Bold words. But we’ll see.” Charles grinned. “So, what’s next for you? You’ve already won the Olympics. Where do you go from here?”
“Next up is the Fencing World Cup. It’s coming up in a few months, so I’m focused on preparing for that.” You smiled, feeling the excitement bubbling inside of you.
Charles nodded. “If people want fo follow your journey, where can they find you?”
“Everywhere.” You said with a laugh, then added, “but seriously, you guys can follow me on my social media. If you are curious about up coming tournaments, you can check out Team Monaco’s offical instagram. They post all of the updates there.”
Charles turned to the camera. “There you have it, guys.” He then faced you and Marco. “I just want to say thank you, for real. I know your schedules are crazy, and you took time to teach me something completely out of my comfort zone. I really had fun.”
“You’re welcome here anytime, Charles.” Marco smiled warmly. “You’re a natural. Who knows? Maybe one day, you’ll be on the piste at a tournament.”
Charles laughed, shaking his head. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, but I appreciate the vote of confidence.”
“You did great today,” you grinned, nudging him lightly with your elbow. “Who knows? Maybe we’ll see you fencing for Monaco one day.”
Charles smiled. “Only if you promise not to embarrass me in front of everyone.”
“No promises.” You teased.
Marco gestured toward the camera. “Alright, shall we wrap this up?”
You, Charles, and Marco all faced the lens. “Thanks for watching!” You said with a wave. “Remember, fencing is cooler than you think.”
“And harder than it looks!” Charles added. “Thank you both for taking the time to teach me, I had a blast today. It’s always fun learning new things.”
“Of course, Charlie!” You replied warmly. “We’ll be waiting for your next fencing session.”
“You’re always welcome, Charles.” Marco smiled. “Just don’t take too long to return, alright? We might have to recruit you into the team at this rate!”
All of you laughed as you said your goodbyes, and with that, the video came to a close, screen fading into black.
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liked by charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend, lilyzneimer, landonorris, lilymhe and 88,746 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, gaiusthecaracal
yn.jpg just a regular day at the office (bonus: taught charles fencing, see slide 4! 😁)
view all 10,837 comments
username8 never knew i needed to see charles in a fencing gear up until now 😮‍💨 THANK YOU MOTHER!
landonorris can’t believe you taught charles first, i thought i was gonna be the first one 😞💔
yn.jpg sorry, big brother privileges 😔✊🏻
charles_leclerc what she said! 😁❤️
landonorris i see that you have taken my advice
yn.jpg yes, and i owe it all to you sir 🫡
landonorris when will u be our quadrant athlete 😔🤲🏻
yn.jpg idk bro, what do they do? 🤨
yn.jpg just hit up my personal coach 😁
landonorris ME NEXT PLS
yn.jpg THERE ARE A LOT OF YOU WANTING ME TO TEACH YOU ALL FENCING 😭😭😭
lilymhe I ASKED HER FIRST! FALL IN LINE!!
landonorris IM HER BEST FRIEND
landonorris BESTIE PRIVILEGES
yourbestfriend EXCUSE ME????
landonorris EXCUSED
username9 WE FINALLY GOT A JPG ACCOUNT??? ACTIVE ERA IS UPON US?????
yn.jpg u guys really gotta thank lando for convincing me on making one bc apparently according to him, i always “ghost” you all 😞💔
username9 OHMGYGOSD I LOVE YOU 😭
username10 GAIUS 🥺🥺🥺🥺
username11 CHARLES WHAT ARE YOU DOING 😭😭😭
username12 petition for you to have a yt acc or tiktok or smth 😔😔😔😔
username13 and then what? we all ended up being ghosted 😔😔😔😔
username13 she barely posts on instagram, and now that she has a jpg account, i’ll take what i can get tl have some y/n content 😔😔😔💔💔💔
username12 omg u right 😭😭😭
username14 ok, scuderiaferrari, just hear me out this once…what if y/n teaches charlos fencing on a tiktok or yt vid? huh huh huh, wouldn’t that be a great idea, right? 😁
scuderiaferrari hmmm, i think you might be onto something 🤔🤔🤔
username15 i will sacrifice my first born for this to happen 🤲🏻
username16 we are BEGGING, on our knees
username17 charles leclerc in fencing gear, save me. charles leclerc in fencing gear, save me 🛐
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cheyisagirlkisser · 26 days ago
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Please please please more Abby!!! Can you write about firefighter Abby since you did bluecollar already... Like Abby saving readers cat then reader goes to see Abby to give her a special thanks make it smut but with plot
I Need a Hero: Abby Anderson HCS
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Content: Firefighter Abby x fem! reader, mentions of comphet/struggles with sexual identity, mentions of reader's cat being saved from a house fire, smut, make-out session, car sex, mult. orgasms, scissoring, fingering, modern AU Abby Anderson, loving, giggly sex instead of just rough and fast we love to see it
Word count: 3.5k
A/N: Thank you for this request it was truly so refreshing to write something with plot. I hope you all enjoy this, and keep in mind that Abby's dialogue is red and reader's is pink!
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✧.* Abby didn't have an easy life, but she was always a hard worker. She tried out college, got a general associates degree, but didn't enjoy the work load. She liked hands-on work and helping people, so she ended up with a EMT certificate from her local college.
✧.* Abby went on to become a firefighter and felt like she had a purpose in life with that. The look on people's faces when she was able to help them was always sent warmth throughout her heart. Though she was quite lonely, her mother having left her at a very young age and her father dead, she didn't have anyone to share her life with. She had her friends Mel, Owen, Manny, and Nora; still, there was always a part of her that longed for a comfort with someone special.
✧.* While Abby wasn't closed off from dating, she was never able to find a person who she had passion with. She went through a few relationships, but Abby could never find someone who understood who she was, that she wasn't just some attractive stereotype. Abby wasn't the type to have problems with any exes or undergo the tragic sapphic break-ups Nora warned her about, but she always felt like she wasn't understanding herself. She didn't know what she was looking for in a person. She dated various women, some more butch and others extremely feminine, some either funny or more po-faced, it was all somehow the same to her. She wasn't heartless, of course. She had fallen in love before and understood what attraction was. She just couldn't seem to find the "one true person" though, as cheesy as she knows that sounds.
✧.* Abby struggled with her sexuality and that may have had something to do with it. While she knew that she was attracted to women, she grew up denying it to herself. Seeing a beautiful girl made her heart stop, but she told herself it was simple attraction. Owen, whom she went to high school with, was her first time and that was when she was done lying to herself. She was definitely not for the men. Her first time with a woman was when she was already 20, but it was when she first felt like she had found a piece of herself. Before Jerry passed, she did come out to him, and his acceptance was branded into her head on repeat, playing over and over again every time she doubts who she is.
✧.* Abby lived in an apartment complex, not run-down and enough for her needs. Her place wasn't extremely decorated but she didn't spend much time there, so it didn't matter much. She constantly thought about more than that, though. She imagined living in the suburbs with a woman she could call her wife and be a wife, too. She dreamed of having perhaps a cat or dog with her and spending her nights watching as her wife's hips swayed softly as she hummed instead of eating cheap Chinese takeout. It was all just some dream, not something she ever considered to happen. At least, not anytime soon.
✧.* It was just another normal day for Abby when all hell broke loose. A few miles from her station, a house was on fire. The neighbor, frantic and in a panic on the phone with emergency services, informed the fire department that the woman who lived there had a cat inside of the house that the owner loved dearly. Unfortunately the woman was not home at the time the fire started, but the neighbor was certain that if she came home to a burning house, she wouldn't hesitate to risk her own life to save her kitty's. Abby's heart already squeezed at her chest at the though and she immediately signed herself up for the rescue.
✧.* When the firetruck arrived at your home, she was immediately hit by the smell of smoke flourishing into the sky. She wasted no time informing her coworkers of her next tasks and with the pull of a mask over her face, she hurriedly approached the burning structure. The front door was locked, which made sense seeing as how you lived in the suburbs and you were not home. Nevertheless, she was able to open a window and didn't hesitate to make her way through the living room. The fire was surrounding the hallway in which your heater seemed to have malfunctioned. The smoke was heavy and Abby was starting to panic. There was no cat to be seen and she was starting to lose hope, her tongue making small calling sounds in desperation that maybe, just maybe the cat would hear. She didn't want to give up, her voice heightening in volume, and right before she tried to open the bathroom door she heard a tiny "meow!" from the opposite side of the hallway. The bedroom. The fire hadn't touched it yet, thank god. Abby quickly burst through the door and found a small short-hair tuxedo cat meowing at her feet. She sighed in relief, muttering a little, soft "I've got you, kitty" before quickly scooping the baby into her arms and carrying it out of the home back out of the window.
✧.* When Abby took off her mask, small cat in her arms, she was greeted with the sight of a woman frantically crying to a few of her coworkers, the others working to put out the flames enveloping your home. There you were, heavy tears rolling down your face and the people surrounding her trying their best to assure you that your cat would be rescued. You were so beautiful even with sobs wracking over you, hair lit up in the sun and your expressions nearly bringing her to tears along with you. Abby didn't hesitate to approach you with the fur-ball cradled in her arms, clearing her throat from the slight smoke and seeing your eyes widen at the sight. "Oh my god, Minka!! My baby, is she okay?!" You shouted, your voice not carrying any aggression, though. It was clear that you were experiencing some fragments of an adrenaline rush coming home to said home burning down with your cat inside. Abby carefully handed your cat back to you, trying not to smile at her own thoughts. Minka, huh? That is the sweetest cat name she has never heard. Abby's heart once again squeezed at the sight of your tears slowing, your lips planting soft kisses all over the kitty's head. You were truly shaken, seeming to care more about the cat than the home. "I assure you that Minka is okay, miss. I found her in the bedroom and the fire hadn't traveled there yet. She may need to be brought in for any inhaled smoke, though." You nodded, holding the cat close. "Thank you...thank you so much, you really are a hero," you praised, your voice strained with emotion. Abby smiled, putting a large but gentle hand on your shoulder. "If you need anywhere to go, just let us know, okay?" A soft upturn of your lips left her cheeks slightly pink. She was supposed to be focusing on her job, goddamnit, but here she was floundering slightly over the soft lines of your smile. She wasn't supposed to be feeling this way about you, not when you just lost your home and almost lost your pet. She quickly composed herself as you replied to her, "I'll have to stay with my parents for a while, but thank you."
✧.* Even after the rescue ended, Abby couldn't get you out of her head. You were just so beautiful and sweet. She could tell even from the hour she'd spent by your side making sure the cat was okay and comforting you that you were probably one of the kindest, most caring people she could ever meet. She reprimanded herself for feeling this way about some stranger whose cat she saved. That's her job, afterall; she isn't supposed to find romance out of it. Why was it that she went home to call Nora and rant to her about the situation? It also didn't make sense that days after, you were in her dream with that same cat, your presence filling up her apartment and yours hands rising to cup her face so softly. You had the touch of an angel. When she woke, she was sweaty and breathless. She felt like she was going insane, dreaming of your touch when she hadn't even felt it yet. Jesus, Abby. Get a damn grip or you'll end up driving yourself crazy...
✧.* Two weeks later, Abby was playing cards with a few coworkers, laughing about some inside joke when her boss cleared his throat, catching her attention. In a gruff but not unfriendly voice as he always seemed to have, he told her that she was needed at his office. At first, she was terrified. What is she was being let go? She made okay money from her job, but she wasn't rich by any means. She wouldn't have enough to still afford her apartment.. Abby was now unusually nervous in a way that she didn't experience often. She always considered herself to her strong both physically and emotionally, but this was a tough situation to keep her composure in.
✧.* Abby was greeted with the sight of you sitting a chair placed against the wall, a tentative but sweet smile on your face. Her heart-rate began to speed up even more than it already was. Her boss spoke up behind her, wearing a tender smile. "She says she'd like to thank you," closing the door behind him. You took a deep breath. "I hope this isn't weird that I just..showed up at your job." Abby quickly shook her head, holding her hands out in a friendly gesture. "No, don't worry. Are you doing okay, though?" Her voice was laced with care, making your cheeks heat up. "Yeah. My parents, they're great people. I'm going to be staying with them until I'm able to afford a new place to stay." Abby smiled softly, for some reason the thought of your parents made her heart tender. "That's good to hear." The silence that followed wasn't exactly uncomfortable, and you couldn't help but get to the point. "Look.. I know it's your job and all, but you seriously saved me in a way I can't repay. I wasn't there, but Minka means everything to me." Your words almost brought tears to her eyes for some strange reason. Abby would like to find irritation in the way you made her so emotional at the flashback to your tears and sweet voice thanking her, calling her your hero, but she couldn't. "Well, I appreciate your gratitude. I don't hear that a lot," she admitted, and it was true. Abby had her friends and everyone in the community respected everyone who worked at the fire station, but she rarely heard appreciation like this. She knew that even if this was the last time she'd see you, your appreciation would stick with her. You looked genuinely shocked by that. "Well, I think you deserve so much appreciation. You put yourself at risk like that for my cat, and not everyone really cares for pets, you know?" Abby agreed with that statement, she knew it first-hand. Unfortunately when it came to rescues, pets weren't the priority. Your situation wasn't rare but it wasn't as common as others. "Well, I'm extremely glad I was able to save your cat. I can tell she's a sweet thing. Purred in my arms as I held her," she smiled as she recalled Minka's vibrations as as she was cradled in her arms. You laughed at that, your sweet smile only widening. "That means she likes you.." You trailed off, clearly meaning to say more. "Look...I feel like I owe you." Abby shook her head at that, her voice assuring. "Really, it's just my job to help in situations like that-" You cut her off, looking adamant, "Please? Just.. please, hear me out." She looked at your face, noting the look in your eyes. She slowly nodded. "I was thinking.. maybe I owe you a date?" Your voice, so sweet and friendly, rang in her ears. Date. You wanted a date with her? She didn't think much before she quickly accepted.
✧.* Abby, in her old ford pick-up truck, showed up at your parent's home with a bouquet of flowers. She didn't know what type was your favorite, so she went with white and pink roses. A little boring, but classics. It was a plus that the soft, pink petals reminded her of you.
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✧.* When Abby was met with your parents at your front door, she felt like she was living out her old dreams of having a genuine high-school romance. Your folks were kind and thanked her for her rescue, even assuring her that she could come over anytime she'd like. Now, that made Abby a bit emotional. She was also emotional upon seeing the tiny black and white cat curled up on the living room couch, safe and content.
✧.* Abby and you just fit together well; the whole ride to the diner she wanted to bring you to went well. She told you riddles and made you laugh and in exchange, you offered up stories of Minka. You told her all about how she was a stray cat who would meow at your door for food and Abby's cheeks turned red thinking about you not hesitating to adopt a cat who had a hard childhood. She felt grateful that the sun was nowhere in the sky, only the moon and many stars so you couldn't see how flustered the thought made her.
✧.* Abby and you laughed away at dinner about countless memories the two of you could think of. Abby told you all about her friend-group and her own gay awakening. You only smiled and confessed that yours was a girl on the school soccer team at 13. Abby told you all about what happened with her parents, what her dreams were, even some of her fears. She didn't know why she felt the need to tell you all of this, but you only looked at her with sympathy and understanding, and you seemed to open up to her, too. For once, she felt understood.
✧.* After the two of you finished eating, you insisted that you pay since you somehow still owe her being her hero and now, apparently you owed her for the beautiful flowers, which you claimed were your favorite. Abby insisted that you needed to save your money after the incident and assured you that your time was payment enough. That made your heart jump out of your chest; how was she so intimidatingly-looking but the sweetest girl you'd ever met? You were in awe.
✧.* On the way home, you noticed an abandoned parking lot beside the highway, probably from an old gas station or restaurant and asked Abby to stop so that you could show her the constellations. She happily agreed, turning into the parking lot and putting her manual into park. She watched as you excitedly stepped out of her truck and laughed, quickly joining you to stand beside you.
✧.* Abby's face once again turned red and her palms grew sweaty when you interlocked your fingers with hers, gazing over to smile at her in the moonlight. Then, you ranted about the stars. You told her all about Orion, your favorite constellation. Abby was mesmerized by the way your found grew in pitch and how your words came out faster than usual when you got excited about something. Fuck, maybe you were already growing on her. She hoped you would like a second date after this. She'd spend all her money from her job on dates like these just to feel the intense pull you had surrounding you. She found herself hanging off of your every word, even though she was just some firefighter who knew nothing about astronomy.
✧.* When you finished your rant about the Big Dipper, she couldn't help herself. She spoke up, voice low and somewhat shy, "Hey.." You smiled and turned to face her, slightly caught off guard by her sudden words. "What's up?" She sighed. She needed to take this chance, you were like the girl of her dreams standing in front of her, ranting about something so cool. "Can I kiss you?" Butterflies hit your stomach, and you didn't hesitate to nod. Abby gently cupped your face and took her time to lean in. When her lips met yours, she swore the stars in the sky all increased in their luminosity.
✧.* Your lips were so soft and tasted like skittles, she thought it was the sweetest thing. Abby took her time to kiss you, not rushing the embrace but instead allowing herself to appreciate being able to kiss you like the two of you were the only people in the world. When she softly pulled away, breathless without even really kissing you that long, you pulled her in once more by the back of the neck and she eagerly parted her lips for you. The next kiss was more heated and passionate, leaving you pressed up against the side of her truck. Your tongue found hers and she moaned at the feeling. She didn't stop herself from taking your bottom lip into her mouth and giving it a soft suck. When you had to pull away for air this time, breathless and your face hot, Abby trailed her wet lips down your the column of your throat, her voice low and heated, "backseats?" And just like that, you were pulling at the truck's backdoor with a cheeky giggle.
✧.* The heated but passionate make-out session fogged up the windows but only turned into more. Soon, you were both naked in her backseat with your cunts making a noticeably loud squelching sound every time they met. It was the most emotional fuck of Abby's life. You couldn't stop leaving kisses all over her skin wherever you could reach, and she knew she could be guiding your hips to make the sensations even better, but all she really wanted to do was hold your hands and tell you how lucky she felt to have you like this, how beautiful you were. The truck was humid and cramped, and since it was the first time the awkward giggles and shaky hands were present, but Abby loved every single second of it. She was pretty sure her truck was moving along with them, but she couldn't care. She was only able to feel how your warm cunt ground against hers at the perfect angle to lavish sensations onto her clits, making her head spin with the need to have you as hers for as long as possible and her, yours.
✧.* The sex was desperate and made her lose her mind with the need to cum, but still slow. Tribbing itself is a lot of work but so very intimate that it can last longer if she needs it to, and she needed it to. She didn't want to stop feeling you like this. She never thought of herself as a vulgar person, but the feeling of your pussy, the way your breath hitched and you even let out soft moans of pleasure when your clit felt their actions only made her want you in the most intense ways.
✧.* The orgasm was the best one she had ever received. You were both moaning together and sweaty, waves of pleasured sharing you. She swore she felt a string connecting the both of you, not only your connected pussies but also your hearts. It wasn't like one singular snap between her legs, but an ongoing slaught of euphoria that she didn't think would ever end. Abby didn't want it to. She wished she could stay in that truck with you forever, just feeling your lips plastered over her skin and your hips meeting hers.
✧.* You didn't mind another round, and Abby happily spent the rest of the hour with her finger buried deep inside you and yours in her own cunt, gifting each other yet another beautiful orgasm. It wasn't exactly the same, your own curling of fingers onto her spongey walls at various paces and times while her own pace grew along with your moans, but it somehow caused the next peak to end up even more special as the first.
✧.* When it was over, it was 9 and Abby still had time to kill. She held you in her arms, legs tangled up together and for just a while, she forgot everything else but what just happened with you. She held you tightly to her and when you both came down from the after-math, you shared little laughs and Abby's voice came through so sweetly and somehow shy, even after all that happened. "Would you wanna do this again?" You laughed and kissed her cheek. "I dunno if I can handle another round, but I wish." She giggled, so sweetly and loving, "I meant another date, dumbass." At that, you sighed and squeezed her. "Oh, well that makes more sense. Yeah, I'd like another date."
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fizzie-frog · 2 months ago
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I don't even know where to start, sorry, buuut Ghostfuckers spoilers ahead.
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"Who needs you anyway?!"
Blitz's avoidant coping once more. I am guilty of avoidant behaviour just like Blitz and while it technically eases stuff, it becomes too much when there's so many problems you ignore and they pile up. This behaviour also makes it hard for someone to be vulnerable, which obviously is the case for Blitz, too. It hurts to be vulnerable. We avoid being vulnerable, because we avoid being hurt.
So instead of trying to talk through with Millie, Blitz opts for being avoidant.
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The imagery in this episode is fucking amazing.
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Now this is just cruel. :(
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She's so pretty, omg...
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Once again, the imagery is amazing. It's so beautiful, but so tragic. Fucking horrible in the best way. The torment Blitz is going through of that fateful day.
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He's breaking down... Crying in front of someone else; this man is avoidant, as stated before, so if he could help he would NOT do this. He's really tormented by his memories.
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They're both so badass damn.
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"You don't hate me?" I'm disintegrating rn. Help me.
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How am I supposed not to sob my eyes out when I see that face?! Taking mom's accessory piece back.
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Holding hands!!! Please, yes!!!
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"You've always been so unbothered by everything, almost bulletproof"
That's avoidance, baby! Blitz needs to stop being relatable...
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But why-
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This absolute POS beating up his already injured son has me fucked up!!! I don't doubt Cash probably beat Blitz many times before, but doing so after being burnt too is a special kind of fucked up! He's always been horrible, and I'm sure this is where Fizz too got his issues (with perfectionism that is) and made him an easy target for Mammon. This mdf really fucked everyone over! Fk him!
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And then separating them when they both needed each other so much! Blitz and Fizz needed each other more than ever in that moment, and yet that POS preferred to have them suffer! I'm riled up honestly, we've never seen much of this mf but he's managed to make himself insufferable with just a few short scenes! He's horrible and if he's not dead then I wish him the worst.
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I miss my baby-
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Being forced to watch all this... Fuuuuck.
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He's so terrified of losing Millie too! Fuck!
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"Blitz can handle this!" Fuck yeah girl, call that mf's bluff.
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"So I'm your best friend, huh?" He's so surprised about that I can't.
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"I've never had a real friend that I didn't wanna fuck..."
...Does that include Fizz? Hm?
This episode was fucking beautiful.
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