#i might give them both husbands. but it depends.

[lesbians-all-the-way-down]

My life won't be complete until I name the other lead in the historical fiction I've decided I'm going to write.

[harmoonix]

Backcountry

(Random Astrology Observations)

🎶: Virgo Moons/Virgo Placements are the maiden, the M symbol in their zodiac sign ♍, indicates the circular nature of karma, love these placements so much 💞

🎶: Capricorn Jupiter/Jupiter in the 10th house or at Cap Degrees 10° 22° grants the native with luck in their careers/jobs

🎶: Midheaven in Leo Degrees 5°, 17°, 29° makes the native to be in the spotlight from a young age, they can get all attention and to be seen as someone very confident

🎶: Venus in Air Signs and Air houses (3rd, 7th, 11th houses) tend to flirt a lot, if they don't flirt they will definitely wait for a good opportunity to do it

🎶: Cancer/Capricorn/Moon/Saturn in the 4th house will love to live a traditional life style, they may also keep in touch with their traditions

🎶: Pisces Moon/Moon in the 12th house are so powerful in their subconscious world, most of these natives can have dreams as a form of signs to warn them about things happening in their lives

🎶: Don't argue with me but Saturn/Capricorn/Scorpio and even Pluto in the 12th house can be indicators of having an difficult/harsh/rough father, and is not your fault in case you have it 💞💞💞

🎶: 8th house ruler in the 12th house or vice versa is extremely karmic, basically you have periods of rebirth after rebirth and evolution I guess in a past life you couldn't expand or evolve that much

🎶: Scorpio/Pluto/Venus in the 3rd house can make the conversation more spicy when you talk with them, like you know talking about a random subject and they throw something spicy into the conversation

🎶: Aries Risings, they have a perfect chart in form of having every sign in their homes and everything can work perfectly at times, of course depends on the placement of planets but your house placements are ✨✨ chef kiss

🎶: Venus in Earth signs have 2 specific love languages (or even more who knows) most earth Venus signs I know love words of affirmation and quality time and I love that about them 💞

🎶: In my ascendant persona chart I have Venus conjunct the ascendant and one specific thing about this placement is that it gives you time to love yourself 💞 is healing

🎶: Mercury aspecting Neptune is an artistic placement, the native is blessed at any types of arts, like design, painting, etc.. they may love music too

🎶: I may not be that much into the draconic chart but I realized some people have a different draconic chart?? and I got soo confused because my draconic chart literally looks like my vedic chart but at different degrees, i checked my sister's draconic chart and is totally different from her vedic chart...

🎶: Saturn in the 2nd house/Saturn in Taurus, there is some sort of anxiety about their worth and value here, both at money and their self worth, they are so worthy but don't realize that 😕

🎶: Moon in Taurus Degrees 2°, 14°, 26°, the native might have a soft inner child, kind, generous, can be very passionate about their dreams and can be sacrificial at times

🎶: Those with Saturn - Jupiter aspects (especially conjunction very rarely find in a chart) can attract succes in the later ages of their lives, succes can be at any type like in love life, maybe in career or something else

🎶: Ascendant at 6°, 18° (Virgo Degrees), They are peaceful and loved natives, Princess Diana had these degrees on the ascendant and she was seen as holy/pure, exactly as Virgo's definition

🎶: Cancer in the 7th house/Moon in the 7th house/Jupiter in Cancer/Jupiter in the 7th house (if you like or are attracted by men) those placements really give the type of husband is who very attached to you/can be a mamas boy and definitely clingy

🎶: Ascendant at 9°, 21° degrees are wild spirits, they are the most outgoing people you will met, definitely that one person who knows how to enjoy life 100%, blessed

🎶: Capricorn Moons/Capricorn Risings are not always cold as some people say, most of the times they want to protect themselves from people and to not get hurt again

🎶: 11° or 23° degrees on the Midheaven indicates someone who may work a lot in online and maybe being successful/known in online

🎶: Jupiter in the 3rd/9th house axis, might be the most curious placement for this planet. Jupiter explores a lot in these houses, makes the native very talkative and open-minded (Also you're really blessed if you have Jupiter in the 9th house)

🎶: Moon in Gemini/Moon in the 3rd house, these natives always have the best advices when it comes to conversations and socializing, they may also talk a lot about their hobbies or things that make them happy

🎶: Mars in Leo/Sagittarius/Gemini/Libra makes the native to be a chaser or to be chased when they're in love especially at flirting

🎶: Midhaven in Libra Degrees 7°, 19° these natives can be known for their beauty or fashion style/maybe for their talents or maybe they can work in a artistic field

🎶: Asteroid Kalisto 204 aspecting Venus bless the native with a lot of love, beauty, passion and talents, is something about their eyes or their voice

🎶: Asteroid Bacchus 2063 aspecting Juno, the native desires a very sensual/sexual relationship, very lusty, maybe even kinky when they're in a relationship

🎶: Asteroid Sirene 1009 in the 1st/6th house the native has this hypnotic energy in their everyday life, their mood might change from time to time

🎶: 11th house placements are very loyal towards their friendships, for them their friends can be their everything

🎶: Pluto or Saturn in the 4th house, native might have an intense family - life/household, may grew with strict parents and strict rules

🎶: Saturn in the 5th/6th/9th houses natives really need to enjoy life A LOT WAYYY more, these native can often get into a depressive state, go out and dance 🩰 🪩, have fun with your friends, maybe connecting with people

🎶: Uranus in Pisces/12th house is full of physic energy, they can have a a very tied relationship with their own subconscious soul & mind

🎶: Juno in the 11th house or Aquarius can happen a lot for people to always ship/pair them with someone, this energy manifests as people crushing over your friendships (If you have Juno at Aquarius Degrees 11°, 23° too)

🌳 - Do you like to go in the backcountry/in the nature/forest?? Especially if you live in areas with forests around, I love that!! I find these things relaxing/healing !! Take care at bears y'all if you live in a country with a high population of bears!!🐻🌳

Hope you have a good time!!🐻 Watch out for bears and be blessed with light today!❤️❤️

All the best,harmoonix ❤️❤️

[martian-astro10]

D9/ Navamsa chart observations - Part 5

Moon in 1st house gives a spouse who is emotionally expressive, they can also be very moody. If you're attracted to men, then this can also mean that your husband might be a huge mama's boy, so marry someone whose mom likes you. With this placement, if you manage to maintain a good bond with your MIL then you'll have almost no problems in your married life. Your spouse can be prone to jealousy as well.

Sun in the 5th house gives you an extroverted spouse, I feel like this works the best when the person who has it, has a really high self esteem, because if not, you can be jealous of the attention that your spouse gets. You can also feel as if you're not good enough for them.

Mercury in the 4th House can mean that your spouse will be working as an advisor. They may also come from a family where education is given a lot of importance (I know a few people with this placement and their spouse's family was super adamant about them completing their master's before marriage, this is true for both men and women). If you're an academically intelligent person then your in-laws would be more than happy to help you establish your own business, I have noticed this to be true in a lot of cases.

Venus in the 5th house.....can give you a spouse who may be a little too obsessed with themselves. I used to think this was a good placement but then I met a lot of people who have this and their spouses always downplay their achievements and play the victim in social situations. I know a couple where both of them have this and they constantly talk about things that the other has done wrong and it's like a competition of who is sadder, it makes me soooo uncomfortable. One good thing is that, your children are gonna be SUPER creative.

Mars in the 11th House is great in regards to finances, your spouse knows how to earn AND save money, and even though they may like to live a luxurious life, they're well aware of the limitations. They may also have friends in high places and be good at climbing the social ladder. One negative of this is, that they can be TOO focused on earning money, but if Jupiter and Venus are well placed then you have nothing to worry about.

Jupiter in the 3rd house can give you a jolly spouse, they can also be the youngest in their family. They may be really close to their family and after marriage, they would like to live close to them. Your family will treat your spouse as their own child. You know those couples where a person's family ends up becoming closer to their spouse than them, yeah, this is what happens when you have Jupiter in 3rd. You guys may also travel a lot together. I think this placement is really cute.

Saturn in the 2nd house gives you an ambitious spouse, very hard working and tough love type person. They may earn a lot of money but refuse to spend it, OR they refuse to spend money on themselves but have no problem spending it on you. It depends on other factors. ( I know a woman with this, and her husband is so fucking rich but doesn't get new clothes for her, and doesn't buy anything for her, I feel so bad ��, Its giving "ballerina farm") BUT you can also get a spouse who is like "here's my credit card, buy whatever you want"

Rahu in 4th is a strong indicator of moving abroad after marriage, I know people who were unable to get a student visa, work visa and then they got married and were able to settle abroad. This also shows that your MIL may be very involved in your married life, whether for good or bad depends on several other factors.

Ketu in the 5th house gives a spouse who won't be that interested in raising kids. They may also be a little emotionally detached, and can believe in traditional gender roles.

I was thinking of not putting this observation, but then.... precaution is better than cure, so...90% of the female celebrities who have been cheated on by their husbands have Jupiter in Gemini/ Aquarius in d9. So if you have this, be very very picky about who you marry, this is for everyone, but especially for those who have this.

© martian-astro All rights reserved, 2024

[bluexiao]

#monsieur neuvillette’s relationship headcanons

NOTES. finally a work after months. i missed this, tbh. but hey, here’s my new husband for you. might also have a part 2 of this i feel like i haven’t written everything yet

WARNING. real identity spoilers (nothing too explicit from the current archon quest i haven’t even done it yet oops)

NEUVILLETTE

(Before)

Before the relationship began, it took a long while for him to truly process what he had been feeling towards you—to be frank, he even thought he was getting sick (which was impossible. He never got sick.), though that thought comes to an end the moment he realizes that the effects only happen when he is around you. Only you.

He had heard of love before. Had seen love. Had read about love. Not just the platonic or familial ones, but also romance and more. And yet, he does not understand them, simply because he considers them as something someone like him would not eventually feel.

And yet, it all changed when he first saw you. Curiosity turns to admiration, and admiration turns to anxiety—which is never good; the sweating on his hands and the back of his neck, and the pressure on his chest whenever your presence comes.

He was only reminded of the term romance when he consulted Sigewinne about it.

“Does it only happen around a certain person, Monsieur?” “Monsieur, I think you are simply in love,” she says. “Humans do tend to have the same symptoms but it does not necessarily mean you are sick. It appears to me that you feel the same as well. Does their presence give you happiness?”

He did not even need to ponder over his answer. What he does ponder over is how he should deal with it. The evidence is overwhelming, and there is only one verdict. And yet, where does this lead to?

Contrary to popular belief, he will confess as soon as he is sure of his feelings. He is an honest and honorable man. He would confess his feelings if he could, but it did take some time knowing how busy his schedule was.

The only thing that probably was able to push him to go through was the Melusines. It took them weeks to have him clear his schedule up for a nice little dinner date that they had planned and suggested to the Monsieur.

“Recently, I have come to realize that I have developed a romantic interest with you, Y/n.”

“I do not intend to put pressure on you. I shall accept whatever judgment you make. I do not wish for you to change how you treat me in any way.”

“If you may… I can only ask to indulge in this meal with you for tonight. Your company eases me greatly.”

Brutally honest. It may even drive you crazy how this all seems so easy on him.

But in reality, his palms were sweating underneath his gloves and the slightly cool sensation of the utensils as he blurts out his intentions for setting up such an occasion. His heart was pounding but he could not process whether this was about how you looked especially good tonight or his nervousness with finally confessing his feelings for you.

Or maybe both. Either way, all evidence of such leads to only one thing—you.

Bonus; I do think he’ll reveal who he is first before he gets into a relationship with you but that really depends on how observant you are.

(During)

It was a surprise to him, at the very least, how he had managed to keep you as his lover despite what he lacks. He knew how he was not well-versed with “feelings” per se (just in his mind), but you, the angel that you’ve always been, chose to be with him.

The sudden change did not occur to him much, actually. But he did notice how much his mind lingers to you more often than not, and how he will end up recalling how you are now his one and only lover.

It takes time for him to adjust, but it all started with frequent conversations (much more than before), then sending flowers to your place every other day (constantly), though most of the time they’re delivered by someone else, knowing how busy he is as the Chief Justice.

Or when he started to first brush his gloved fingers to yours.

When he does something, it will be constant. (Maybe this also comes from being responsible and disciplined as shown by being the Chief Justice). All the things that he did before, he still does them now—unless you’ve told him no, of course.

He is definitely a man of his honor!!

And would always ask for your permission first before he touches your hand, or holds them, or hugs you, or kisses you.

He does like pampering and showering you with “offerings” though.

Stuff like buying your favorite flowers or trinkets once or twice a week, making sure you have enough supply of the best water out there. And even with how he always has an umbrella or parasol for you (ones he got ever since you got together; one in his office, one that’s foldable for him to carry under his coat, and one he gave to you for every time you leave the house.

Through the course of the relationship, he learned about the beauty of life, which is how he sometimes brings you flowers despite its short life. However, he still secretly prefers giving you trinkets for your hoard of gifts from him, mostly because it symbolizes his everlasting love for you. (He’s very romantic like that, even if he does not know he is)

He will also introduce every single Melusine in Fontaine. At first, it may surprise you how he knows all of their names, but it will surprise you even more the moment you realize you could do the same. If you do, he’ll love you even more (which he thought was impossible at first as he knew he already loves you very much).

The Melusines will treat you as their other parent the moment it is known amongst all of them that you’re his lover. Sigewinne, for one, would always give you a personalized gift. She would also always send you letters to ask how you are and probably be quite excited whenever you accept an invitation for a cup of tea.

Monsieur Neuvillete is not jealous, but he is possessive and territorial. It’s a dragon instinct, forgive him.

It also comes with being protective. Though he’s not feral, he would make sure to always shield you away from any harm, or anything that might take you away.

One time, he had to deal with a bunch of… shameless individuals who had tried to make a move on you, and though he has great trust on you, he cannot help but have the same self-deprecating voices in the back of his mind.

Though instinctively, he finds himself buying you trinkets or flowers again.

“Hm? You just gave me one earlier, didn’t you?” You look up with a confused look but still hold that smile that stirs butterflies in his chest.

He nodded. “The flowers reminded me of you, mon amour. I could not help but feel the urge to give it to you.”

It does not stop him from giving you offerings.

Of course, he cannot just give up on you. The ruling of whoever deserves your love and affection the most. Of course, he is at an advantage knowing that he’s already your lover.

“Is there something wrong?” You looked up to him, hearing the pitter patter of the rain outside through the taps on the windows. You had your hands on his shoulders, gently rubbing them with your palms.

“It’s nothing, mon cœur, no need to worry.” He flashes you a reassuring smile, and yet, at the back of his mind, he wondered how you could have thought to check on him. Is it perhaps the gloominess in the atmosphere?

You frown as you look at him intently, “There are times when you’d shower me gifts with a saddened look on you. I’m worried, is all.”

He stares at you then. Ah, so you noticed, he thought.

He chuckles as he shakes his head and stands right next to you. “May I?” He opens his arms and you nod and dive right into his chest. He enclosed you into an embrace, relishing the feeling of your warmth.

He kisses your forehead then. “Allow me to bask in your presence for a while.”

For short, one of the best. Definitely a 100/10.

[dark-devious-dom]

Best Self Help Tips for women

(TW: this post contains mentions of rape and misogyny. If you don't like it, do not interact. Let us practice our safe kink and fantasies)

1. The Cock Worship Bible

It is a guide to pleasing Men and loving cock.

Watch porn as often as you can. Porn teaches you how to behave properly as a woman because it often depicts women in traditional gender roles who go weak for men with big cocks. women are depicted in porn as being docile and stupid.

Do degrading and humiliating tasks for Men. Be their entertainment. Keep yourself busy.

I might make a detailed post about it some other time.

2. Learn to love denial

Don't cum without male permission.

Entertain Men by edging yourself. Edging makes you dumb and desperate.

Only use your pussy if a man gives you permission.

Practice anal and deepthroating everyday for at least an hour each.

3. Men like dumb girls

Act dumb even if you believe you aren’t (Men will go out of their way to help you and will perceive you as helpless making them want to protect you and/or hurt you).

The reason Men enjoy stupidity and naivety is because it gives them a feeling of power and control. As rightfully so.

Drop out of school and quit your job. These are boy activities. If you are worried about supporting yourself then consider occupations like sex work, camming, and being a hooters waitress. But you shouldn't worry about because (the next point).

Your role should always be of a wife to a Man. Traditional values output the best results for family. And as you know, we all need a little bit of fun in life so if your Husband decides to make you a sex slave, do not hesitate or worry. Embrace yourself.

3. Embrace sexual assualt

Groping is a compliment and even if its inconvenient for you, you should suck it up and say thank you. Be flattered he found you so attractive he couldn’t help himself groping you. Groping you is the natural right of the Man.

Rape is a natural part of life for many women and you should accept that. Rape is often enjoyable for both parties even if you don't admit it.

Be a rapebait. Wear less clothes. Show off your body. Let the Men know you are there to be groped and raped.

Physical violence is OK. It is OK for a Man to beat a woman up. So embrace that. You probably would hate it at first and quite frankly the Men love it when you hate it. So just embrace it within yourself.

4. Cooking and cleaning 101

Cooking is an essential skill for survival and has been performed by women for centuries. Learn a few delicious dishes and then show off your skills for him and see if he deems you worthy of being his whore. Remember, the way to a Man's heart is through his stomach so a good meal is essential before a blowjob.

Cleaning will put men at ease. Learn to love scrubbing the floors and keep a tidy home. Men will appreciate this.

5. One Sided Polyamory

While some men may enjoy monogamy the majority do not. A lot of these tips are also dependent on what the Man wants. Best advice is to just ask him. If he wants multiple wives then just accept it. If he wants a wife and a few pets that works as well. Just deal with it.

Bisexuality seems to be the way most women are going nowadays. If you believe you are 100% straight, swallow your pride and play with other girls to please him.

6. Being Pretty for Men

95% of being pretty is simply taking care of yourself, shower everyday, exercise often, eat healthy foods, wash your face, brush and floss your teeth, moisturize. You can’t cover up an unhealthy appearance with good style. You know what you need to do. Be pretty.

Your style will largely depend on your Master’s opinions. If he likes slutty whores porn, dress like a slutty porn whore; if he likes goth girls, slap on some black eyeliner; if he wants you to dress conservatively in front of other Men then do so.

7. Daily Blowjobs

Men often fantasize about women who are fascinated with having sex and addicted to their cocks. So put this in your mind that you will offer him blowjobs every day. Act stupid, stick your tongue out, tell him how yummy it tastes.

Practice your cock sucking skills on a dildo every day so you get better at it.

8. Painal

A man enjoys tight holes and your asshole is tighter than your pussy. You should tell him that you love anal. Express yourself when you have the permission. Don't bore him.

Doing anal should be a necessity for a lasting relationship. The first time you do anal it will likely hurt and he will likely enjoy it even more because of that. Be sure to suck it up and tell him how grateful you are.

9. Breeding? Yay or Nay?

It will depend on your master and what he deems as appropriate. Some men enjoy pussy sex and love the idea of getting a girl pregnant. Others despise it. General tip is to not touch your pussy or even edge it and not to cum. Certainly not without permission anyway. If he is really into making a good girl out of you, he will do his best. And you will obey him.

Be a good breeding pet for him.

10. He is the King

He is Superior and you are inferior.

Respect him. Obey him. Please him.

Thanks for tuning in for the best self help guides. Here are other posts in the series which you might like. (click on them).

Training your new trauma slut | 10 signs you are becoming a better cunt

[wszczebrzyszynie]

Hey!! Could you give a little context about this drawing??: https://www.tumblr.com/wszczebrzyszynie/770499218761711616/brutus?source=share

Btw, beautiful drawing <33

thank you for the kind words and the interest! its a bit long as i went into more detail about the relationships between Kowalewicz family members... thought that might be nice, as i dont really share much about them. peace and love. its under the read more

its Eliza in three stages of her life; childhood, her wedding day and present time (around 1895). "Brutus" is a reference to the song by the buttress because its the song i associate with her (mostly in her relationship with Artur and her former husband). Shes the oldest of the Kowalewicz siblings and the one who against all odds ultimately inherited the palace, even though she seems to stay as far away from it as possible; as a character she doesnt come back until spring, so about halfway of the story, but her presence is always there. The main theme of DNS is loneliness and she as the owner of the palace is kind of the epitome of that; someone who felt sidelined for the majority of her life and even after decades have passed isnt able to feel normal and create what she considers "normal" relationships (the way she treats Stanisława and Artur come to mind; The first one is her lover she leaves in charge of the palace when shes away, unable to stay with her for long periods of time, and Artur is her brother she somewhat hates, mostly for being what she couldnt and for depending on her). Even her child-self is meant to resemble Mika (titular ghost of the attic), as being a "ghost" is the repeated motive for loneliness (all "ghost" characters, so Mikita, Eliza and Jelena are the ones whose loneliness is so central to their character it fundamentally changes them). The blood on her wedding veil is there because she killed her husband (family friend and Arturs artistic mentor). it sounds like a lot but its not very important to the main plot, it happened ages ago but its probably one of the many reasons she doesnt like the palace. but well she would never get rid of it either

since im already talking about the Kowalewicz family i feel like i should also mention Piotr, the other brother; hes not really too important to the story but he does show up and Eliza hates him as well. He got richer through foreign investments. Eliza doesnt really like her brothers in general but with Artur its more quiet and she still respects him, with Piotr its more open and well known among everyone living and working in the palace. which isnt a lot of people. He doesnt like her either and would like to buy off the palace just to spite her. Well he doesnt like Artur either. Artur doesnt care for whatever Piotr is doing but hes slightly hurt about his relationship with his sister, though he is also intimidated by her. Not exactly because of the murder hes always been a bit intimidated by her but well the murder doesnt help? but he doesnt hold that against her either. Stanisława is intimidated by all of them except for Eliza, though i imagine she has a rather lovely relationship with Helene even with the language barrier. Helene and Dominic only know Eliza; she likes them both, though its a pretty distant kind of "like". its just generally positive but nothing deep or special, though she always tends to treat women better, and she also isnt the kind to hate on a 13 year old. also i think i should mention Mikita in the picture? I feel like she couldnt care less about what he does. I wouldnt be surprised if she forgets hes there. Not in a malicious way shes just like that i suppose. Stanisława likes him plenty for her own reasons. He respects both of them deeply and tries not to cause them much trouble

[cosmerelists]

How Kaladin Would Flirt With Other Cosmere Characters

As requested by @cam-ulu29 :)

Hot off the back of my post about other characters flirting with Kaladin, cam-ulu29 asked if I could also write about Kaladin being the big flirt with other characters. So let's just say that Kaladin had the ability & the desire to flirt...how might he do so?

1. Lyn

Kaladin: I'm glad that there are women Windrunners now. Lyn: Man, me too! Kaladin: And specifically I am glad that you. A woman. And a Windrunner. Are here. Lyn: Awww, thanks! Kaladin (visibly sweating): Yes you. As a woman. Who is a Windrunner. And is here. Lyn: Are you...are you having a stroke right now?

2. Renarin

Kaladin: Hey, Renarin...back when you first joined Bridge 4, did you have a crush on me? Renarin: ! Renarin: W-Was it obvious? Kaladin: N-No, not really! Syl told me. Later. That she thought you did. Renarin: Oh... Kaladin: ... Kaladin: Any chance you still do?

3. Leswhi

Kaladin: Hey, uh, Leshwi? I was wondering if you would be free for an honorable duel, maybe Tuesday night? Leshwi: Certainly. I will assemble the shanay-im. Kaladin: Oh, well, I was actually thinking of an honorable duel with just you and me, you know? Syl: And me! Kaladin: And also Syl. Leswhi: ... Leshwi: Tuesday you said? It's a date.

4. Rlain

Kaladin: Ugh, all these women keep coming to the clinic to flirt with me. Kaladin: I can't get any work done! Kaladin: I bet if they knew I was in a relationship already, they'd stop. Kaladin: Hey Rlain...do you want to hold hands? Rlain: ...Are you asking me to pretend to be your boyfriend? Kaladin: Pretend?

5. Laral

Kaladin: Crazy how we're both single now. Laral: ... Laral: You mean because you got dumped and my husband DIED? Kaladin: Uh... Laral: ... Kaladin: So...not the right moment to see if you want to get a drink and catch up? Laral: NOPE

6. Adolin

Kaladin: I think horses are mean and scary. Adolin: That's just 'cause you haven't been around them enough! I swear! They're cool and friendly! Kaladin (continuing as if Adolin said nothing): But I would accept being around horses. Lots of mean horses. Kaladin: If it meant. Kaladin: Being around you. Adolin: ...? Kaladin: ... Adolin: ... Adolin: Oh! Adolin: Nice.

7. Shallan

Kaladin: [sighing dramatically] Shallan: What's wrong? Kaladin: I want to flirt with someone, but she's much wittier than I am, so I don't know how to even start. Shallan: Oooh, that's exciting! Can I give you advice? Kaladin: I would LOVE advice. Shallan: Well, it depends on whether you can match her wit, or whether you think she's entirely too witty for that. Kaladin: I think I could. Sometimes. Probably not while also flirting, though. Shallan: Sure, sure. Well, you can always just enjoy her wit and let her enjoy how smart she is. Kaladin: Yeah? You think making her feel smart is a good tactic? Shallan: Well, it certainly can't hurt! Kaladin: [significant look] Shallan: ... Shallan: Oh! Shallan: Nice.

8. Moash:

Kaladin: You know...I bet I could swallow a WAY bigger sphere than you could... Moash: MY BED IS UPSTAIRS LET'S GO RIGHT NOW

9. Szeth

Kaladin: You know...I've been thinking that maybe this trip is a chance to find what I really need. Szeth: I feel the same way. Kaladin: You...you do? Szeth: I do. Nightblood: (Me too!) Kaladin: Well, good...because I think what I really need is... Kaladin: You... Szeth (simultaneously): Vengeance. Nightblood (simultaneously): The eradication of evil! Kaladin: ... Kaladin: I don't know what I expected.

10. Jasnah

Kaladin (talking to someone else): I mean...being partnered is fine, I guess, but the sex stuff I don't really get. Jasnah: ... [...] Kaladin (to someone else): Darkeyed Radiants is good and all but, I mean, we still have slavery. Anyone who really cared about social change would do somehing about that! Jasnah: ... [...] Kaladin: (to someone else): I like Wit, but storms can he be annoying sometimes. Small doses, you know? Jasnah: ... [...] Kaladin (talking to someone else): So then I convinced the ardents that locking up the insane in dark rooms was NOT a good thing--they're gonna change the treatment! Jasnah: ... Jasnah: Has Stormblessed always been so attractive?

[bouquetface]

GROOM (5129) PERSONA CHART OBSERVATIONS

Accuracy depend on entire chart

Groom conjunct Jupiter.

My sister has this, her ex was a pisces. Her husband is a sag. Jupiter traditionally rules both pisces & sag. Despite, this being in Leo, her husband has no leo placements. However, Jupiter & Groom are in 5th H in the persona chart and they do have 3 kids. Some might this consider a lot. Jupiter gives abundance.

Groom & Mercury in Gemini 7th H.

This person has groom and mercury in gemini 7th house. Not close enough to be a conjunction. However, her husband has no gemini placements. He is a libra sun (7th sign associated w the 7th House). He is a Virgo rising. Mercury traditionally rules both Virgo & Gemini.

Her Chiron is conjunct Groom gemini. This might explain her previous relationships where she was cheated. Their marriage is one of the longest I know. So in case you have chiron conjunct groom and are freaked out by it. Don’t be!

Saturn in 4th.

Saturn can show where you might have challenges. My friend with this placement received criticism from her mother on her choice to marry her husband. This is due to them being younger and she did not like his career choice. She values family and this did hurt her.

Saturn in 2nd. Saturn conjunct Uranus.

This woman has saturn conjunct uranus in 2nd. Although, the couple is financially well off, they have previously disagreed about selling a property. Occasionally, she mentions they still disagree on financial choices like this. But they always work through it.

Sag Ascendant.

Her husband has a sag venus in natal.

Cancer Venus.

His natal venus is placed in the 4th house.

Aries Ascendant.

Her fiancé has Libra rising conjunct mars in natal.

[4linos]

through every pitch

mlb!seungmin x gn!reader

synopsis: even though it's your husband's most important game of the season, you can see that he's attempting to disguise an injury.

wc: 1964 (⸝⸝ᵕᴗᵕ⸝⸝)

The stadium is blazing with the cheering crowd at the bottom of the eighth inning, and Seungmin is feeling the pressure of the moment. The spectators' eyes and his teammates' pressure are all on him in this game, which might determine the division title and where he needs to prove himself. The little stiffness in his delivery, the tension in his shoulder, the way his expression hardens as he adjusts his grip on the ball—you can see it. You watch from your seat, heart in your throat, as he stands on the mound, composed, concentrated.

The pitch is off. His usual precision is missing. There has been a slight but noticeable change in technique, and his slider and fastball both have a hitch now. You see it. He sees it. However, he continues. His eyes widen against the pain, his jaw gritted, and he throws again. He wants no one to know and doesn't want to reveal it. No, not yet. Not with that much at stake. He's a vital part of the team. The coach is watching him closely, fans are yelling his name, and his teammates are waiting for the sign that the win is impending. As he grits his teeth and fights through the pain, Seungmin is aware that they depend on him to achieve this, and the pressure is unbearable.

The noise of the crowd, the pressure of everyone's eyes on him, and the expectation all keep him going even though his body is screaming at him. While the crowd screams when he strikes out the hitter to close the eighth, Seungmin isn't feeling the exhilaration of the victory. His arm burns with every movement, and his muscles tremble from the pain as his body gives way under the pressure. As you wait for him in the locker room, your anxiousness gets worse by the moment. You've seen the symptoms: his tight jaw, his tendency to favor one arm during the game, and the way he massaged at his shoulder in between throws. He has hardly spoken to you since the game, and his eyes have a cold, distant expression as he enters the room, sweat still dripping from his brow. Again, he is concealing it. disguising the weight of it all, the suffering, and the exhaustion. You get up from where you were seated and say, "Seungmin," trying not to seem overly anxious, but there is no denying the worry in your voice. “Are you okay?” He's already taking off his jersey, and although his face is unreadable, his hand is clearly shaking. You can tell he's attempting to hide it by the way he holds his arm rigidly and the way he grimaces when he takes has to do any movement. His voice is flat when he says, "I'm fine," but the words sound hollow. He avoids looking at you. "No, you're not," you respond as you approach him, trying to maintain your composure while your voice cracks a little. "Please, Seungmin. Out there, you were hurting. I saw it. Talk to me, please. He remains motionless and looks at the floor for a minute without answering. You can see it then—the way his hand is shaking, the way his entire body is rigid from the strain of maintaining the façade—that his breathing is shallow and strained. For a short period of time the barriers he has been carefully building during the day crumble, and you witness Seungmin's vulnerability and rawness. The individual who is human, just like the rest of us.

And then, the dam breaks.

Before you can reach out to him, he collapses, falling to his knees in front of you as his shoulders tremble with a soft sob. His face is buried in his hands, and he is sobbing in ways you have never heard him do before. A man who is completely exhausted and defeated by the weight of it all has taken the place of the strong, unflappable man who had just pitched through one of the most significant games of his career. "I could not...” His words muffled in his hands, he chokes out, "I couldn't let them down," in between sobbing. "I had to get it done. Everyone was depending on me—the coach, the team, and all of the fans.”

Your heart shatters when you kneel in front of him and take his shaking hands, gently removing them from his face while looking into his tear-filled eyes. “You didn't let anyone down, Seungmin. You didn't have to carry it alone, but you pushed through for all of us.” He holds his breath and shakes his head, seemingly unable to fully comprehend what you're saying. "I'm... "I'm so exhausted," he mumbles, his voice hardly audible. “My arm… it’s killing me. But I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t show them. I had to be strong for everyone else.” As you reach out to embrace him, tears stream from your own eyes. Holding him close, you feel his breath catch in the stillness of the room as you press his head against your chest. As you brush your fingers through his hair, you murmur quietly, "You don't have to be strong all the time." "You don't need to bear all of this alone. You are allowed to fall apart, take a break, and seek help. You just hold him for a long time as the cries gradually stop. Although you both know that it will take time for the physical aching in his shoulder to go away, the emotional stress and pressure he has been carrying for so long starts to lessen under your touch.

A little embarrassed but not enough to conceal his vulnerability from you, he pushes back and wipes his eyes. His voice is scratchy as he whispers, "I'm sorry." "I just didn't want you to see me in this way." You gently push his wet hair away from his forehead and smile. "You don't need to say sorry. Seungmin, I'm here. I'm always here for you. The weight of the world he had been carrying finally starts to decrease as he puts his head on your shoulder because, for the first time in a long time, he is letting himself rely on someone else. And it's okay. You’re both okay.

—

Something changed between you and Seungmin after that night. In a way that was both real and beautiful, the dam that had held so much of his vulnerability, so much of his anxiety and dread, started to break. Gradually, he began to depend more on you. Not only after the most significant events in his career, but also during the quiet, everyday times when he felt he could no longer bear the burden alone, he would open up to you.

It started with small things.

You could see how his eyes would stay on you a bit longer than normal after a difficult game, while he was still recovering from the disappointment of a poor performance. It was a subtle request for something you didn't have to ask for. Watching him jog off the field with a gentle smile on your face, you would be in the stands waiting for him. He would say, "Hey," in a weak, sluggish voice. His face was filled with fatigue as he stood there for a while, taking long breaths as if he was still struggling to regain his breath after the game.

With a soft yet strong tone, you would comment, "I know it wasn't perfect." But, Seungmin, you gave it your all. You always do. And it would occur at that point. He would whisper, "I don't know if I did enough," and then briefly look down before looking back at you. "I thought I had disappointed everyone. I should have maintained my composure more or thrown that one pitch better. I always want to get better, but sometimes it feels like I'm failing."

You’d reach for him, a hand on his shoulder, or on his cheek, grounding him. "You’re not failing. No one’s perfect, Seungmin. I’m proud of you, every time you step out there. And you don’t have to be perfect for me. Just you… just you is enough." He would stare at you, letting your words settle over him like a warm blanket, and in the silence that followed, you knew what was happening. He was opening up, bit by bit, allowing the worries he’d carried for so long to spill out, trusting you to hold them, even if just for a moment. It became more common after tough games—when he felt like he was walking off the field a little heavier, or when he’d missed a crucial strike. He’d sit with you, just the two of you, long after the stadium had emptied, talking quietly about his fears, his regrets. He never tried to hide it anymore.

One evening, after a particularly rough game, Seungmin collapsed onto the couch, his shoulders slumped in defeat. You could feel the tension in him, the unease, even before he spoke. The game had been a tough loss, and you knew it wasn’t just the defeat on his mind but everything that came with it—the expectations, the pressure, the fear of not living up to it all.

“I don’t know if I’m cut out for this sometimes,” he admitted quietly, voice barely above a whisper. He wasn’t asking for sympathy, just someone to listen. “Every time I step on that mound, I feel like I’m carrying the weight of everyone’s hopes. The coach, the team, the fans… they all expect me to be this perfect pitcher. And sometimes, I wonder if I’m enough for them.” As you sat next to him, you stared into his eyes and softly squeezed his hand. With a stern yet gentle tone, you said, "Seungmin, you're more than enough." "You don't have to live up to everyone else's standards. You don't need to be perfect for your coach, your teammates, or even the fans. Because you *are* you, you are enough. And no matter what, I'm here with you. A slow breath escaped him, and you could see it, the relief that he wasn’t carrying it alone anymore, the exhaustion lifting just a little. With his fingers tightening around yours, he said, "I'm really lucky to have you." "To be honest, I don't think I could survive these games without you."

You smiled, brushing a lock of hair from his forehead. “You don’t have to make it through alone, Seungmin. We’re in this together. Whatever comes, we face it as a team.”

Over time, these moments became more frequent—him pulling you aside after a tough game, confiding in you, showing a side of him that was rarely seen by anyone else. The strength he had on the field was matched only by the strength you both built together off of it. And as his teammate’s expectations, the coach’s strategies, and the media’s scrutiny continued to press in on him, Seungmin began to realize something he hadn’t before: It’s okay to need support. And that it didn’t make him any less of a man, any less of a pitcher, to admit that he needed someone to lean on.

And it was always obvious when he came to you: regardless of how many games were won or lost, you were his base, the spot he could always go to feel safe. You made sure he never felt like he had to confront those struggles alone since he had grown to trust you with the weight of his anxieties and to let you in during his periods of uncertainty. He realized that he only needed to be himself to be liked, not be flawless, through every pitch and every difficult game. And he might be just that in your arms.

—

nini’s notes 111224

hey ⚾️. i hope you enjoy my 2nd full fic 🫣 i love seoul series first pitch seungmin BTW

(feedback is always appreciated.. 😘)

asks are open if you have a question, concern, or request!

-🎀

[trippinsorrows]

what the heart wants + one

authors note: here we are again with another au. this one, however, is a hot ass mess. i condone none of this shit.

also, this particular au will be told through a set of interconnected, non-chronological oneshots.

warnings: angst, some minor smut, and a shit ton of mess

words: 6k

suggested listening: 'a drop in the ocean' by ron pope

There have to be over a hundred different ways Solana predicted her life would turn out. Almost all of them ended with letters after her name, a white coat and stethoscope around her neck, and a set of children and husband in a cozy, white picket fenced house somewhere in the suburbs.

Such a traditional, stereotypical, happy ending of sorts. But, it’s an ending she settled on being hers.

If only things ended up that way, because nothing about her current situation is anywhere near the path to that standard domesticity. 

Solana’s hand naturally falls to her stomach, pushing past the fluffy material of the dress. Material that hides the secret she’s been sitting on for almost two months now. A secret that stands to ruin, quite literally, everything.

“Solana!”

The woman in question jumps and quickly removes her hand, focused now on the icy glare of her older sister. A stark contrast to her cruel expression is the natural beauty Samantha “Sam” Miller has always possessed. Her makeup is light, as anything heavier takes away from her natural beauty. Her dark, long, loose curls cascade down her back and complement her practically perfect complexion. The white, bodycon type dress hugs her curves in all the right ways and highlights the toned planes of her body, including a flat stomach.

She looks perfect.

She always has though. 

That’s always been part of the problem, because how could Solana ever compete with that?

“Sorry,” Solana mumbles, nervously fiddling with the side of her dress. “What—”

“Why aren’t you wearing the dress I picked for you?”

Solana tenses. Another issue she’s been avoiding that ties back to the biggest issue she’s avoiding. 

The answer, as rehearsed, is simple. “It—it doesn’t fit anymore.” Not an entire lie. The dress Samantha selected for her bridal party to wear at the wedding rehearsal was always a bit snug. Still is. The difference now, however, is that it’s even more snug in the stomach area, the same area Solana needs to keep cloaked as if her life depended on it.

And in some ways, it does. 

Samantha’s eyes narrow. “What do you mean it doesn’t fit anymore?” She scoffs, shaking her head and crossing her arms. “Oh my God, I knew you were getting fatter.” Solana would have more of a reaction if not for the fact that she’s used to these kinds of comments. She’s heard them her whole life from her sister. “Jesus, can’t you do a crash diet or something? It’s not fair that I—”

“Samantha, what’s wrong?”

Nina’s smooth voice enters the conversation. Both sets of eyes fall on the woman with a grace and beauty about her both physically and non-physically. Nina Miller’s presence is usually felt before she enters a room. She truly is someone who commands the attention of all nearby, including that of a now embarrassed Solana.

“Mom, your fatass daughter can’t fit the damn dress I picked for her to wear tonight, so she’s got….this on instead.”

Again, Sam’s words don’t really do much to Solana. Nina’s almost disappointed expression almost does though.

“Solana.” She gives a faux smile that doesn’t reach her warm eyes. “Honey, you know how important this night is for your sister. You should have been mindful of your food intake these past few months.”

“More like her whole life.”

As always, Nina ignores the cruelty extended from one child to another. Her judgmental gaze takes in Solana’s alternative outfit. “It doesn’t look awful, but it does make you look bigger.” She reaches a hand and places it on Solana’s shoulder. “I’ll send you over some articles for a few diets that might be good for you.” 

Solana still says nothing. This also wouldn’t be the first time her mother has tried to help her with her “weight” problem. 

After all, as Nina has said multiple times, “no one’s going to want a fat person for their doctor, Solana.”

“Sam.”

Another voice. One that makes the hairs on the back of Solana’s neck stand up, that has her wishing for quite literally anything to happen that will cause the earth to swallow her whole or somehow grant her invisibility. 

He stands behind Nina and Sam, her sister’s height partially obscuring her view of him, but most definitely not his view of her. 

And the minute his penetrating gaze falls on her, Solana knows she needs to make herself scarce.

“Roman.” Her mother’s sickeningly sweet address of the man Solana should technically also address, as per protocol, is just more fodder for the youngest Miller girl to try to quietly make her escape.

If not for her damn sister.

Solana tenses when Sam reaches and grabs her arm. Their eyes lock, and Sam glares, “did you acknowledge him?”

Did you?

It takes a lot for her to keep that snarky comeback locked within the confines of her head. A wise decision, as she knows the rock on Sam’s left finger is all the acknowledgement she needs to give.

Just the thought of it has her chest hurting. A pain that intensifies as Solana forces her gaze to lift to Roman’s. His eyes are piercing into her, questioning, inquisitive, curious, wanting.

There’s a heaviness in the back of her throat as she forces out in a leveled but low voice. “My Tribal Chief.” And just like that, before he can offer any sort of response, Solana is turning to leave, desperate to put as much distance between herself and him as possible. 

But, as have been most things in her life in the past couple of months, the universe has something else in mind. 

Because Solana is halfway down the hall of the church, a partial view of the restroom signs in her line of vision when she hears someone call after her.

Another familiar, unwanted interruption. 

She starts to ignore him, actually does so as she continues walking, only for him to catch up to her, grabbing her arm and moving in front of her.

“Solana.” 

She closes her eyes, unable to handle the almost pleading expression on his face. Swallowing, she addresses him, “Jey.”

It’s clearly not the kind of address he was looking for, but he leaves it alone. “How you doing?” 

A stupid ass question, one that has her scoffing as she asks, still not looking at him, even as he drops his hand from her. “What do you want, Jey?”

“I been calling and texting you.”

“What do you want?”

There is full recognition of her rudeness in this moment. Solana knows this, and she also knows that it’s not entirely directed toward the man before her. Knows that, if anything, he’s the one who should be upset with her. 

And the minute she finally allows herself to look at him, she sees that warranted frustration.

“What’s your problem?” Another fair question with a loaded, layer answer not appropriate for this setting. “Trying to check on you. Trying to check on the bab—”

“We’re fine,” is her clipped answer. She hugs herself, trying to move past him. He stops her, however, prompting her to plead, “Jey, please—”

“Why you acting this way? Huh?”

She closes her eyes again. “I’m not acting any kind—”

“Bullshit.” An appropriate callout, but one that has her eyes watering again. “I don’t get it. One minute you was all over me, now I can barely get you to fucking look at me.” And she still doesn’t, not until the next thing that leaves his mouth practically forces her to. “At least, I’m trying to be involved. Trying to step up. What the fuck has Roman done?”

That’s when she finally meets his pointed gaze. Swallowing, she warns, “don’t.”

“Why?” Jey is clearly unwilling to back down. Unsurprising. He has more in common with his cousin than he’d probably like to admit. “Man, when you gon’ get over him? He’s marrying your sister. Even if it is his—”

“Then, it’s none of your business,” Solana pushes back, once again trying to leave only for Jey to continue to block her. “Mo—”

“But, if it isn’t, then it is my business.” 

And that brings about an uncomfortable truth that Solana is not fully ready to admit out loud. Not even in the slightest, because she shouldn’t want either of them to be the one. Jey is, in many ways, the best outcome.

If only he was the one she wanted.

“Be honest with me, Solana.” His voice does an almost 180 from the previous irritated tone, shifting into something also solemn and vulnerable. “Was any of it ever real?” Another question she wasn’t expecting, just like any of this. “Did you ever actually give a fuck about me or were you just using me to get over him?”

Solana swallows. “Jey, I never—”

“Answer the damn question, Solana!”

“Hey!”

Another new voice enters. One Solana is actually grateful to hear.

Vai marches over to them, shoving on Jey, forcing him to move out of Solana’s way. “Leave her alone, Jey.”

He looks down at his cousin with an almost sneer. “Aye. This don’t involve you, Vai.”

Vai, however, has never and will ever be that person to back down. “The hell it doesn’t! You all only know her because of me.” A true statement that could either be a good or bad thing, depending on the perspective. “Come on, Sola.”

Solana is grateful and keeps her head down as Vai ushers them past a still watching Jey. But, it’s only when they’re in the privacy of the restrooms that Solana finally cracks.

She cries into her hands, overwhelmed and overcome with the heaviness of it all.

“Oh, Sola….” Vai comes up to her, engulfing her in a hug. “It’s gonna be okay.”

“No, it’s not,” Solana cries into her, clutching her almost. “I—I messed up.”

“Solana, this isn’t all your fault. My dumbass brother and cousin played a role in this as well.”

“But, I should have known better,” Solana argues, placing the bulk of the responsibility on herself. “I—I knew it was wrong.”

“So did they.” Vai has never been unafraid to call a spade a spade. Someone who agrees with holding all parties responsible. It’s partially why Solana values their friendship so much, because just as Vai can be a hot ass mess on any given day that ends in ‘Y,’ she’s always been in Solana’s corner, ready to support and go to war for her.

In many ways, a better “sister” than Sam has ever been. 

“Look.” Vai steps back and wipes away some of Solana’s tears. “I know it’s a lot, but we just have to make it through the next couple of days, and then we’re out of here for a month, so you can clear your head and get away from this all.”

And it’s in a set of back to back interactions that Solana completely forgot that while the next few days are bound to be some of the hardest of her life, going to spend a month in Mexico with her best friend and abuela is truly bound to be the kind of escape she needs.

Because Vai is most definitely right when she says that Solana needs to get away from all of this.

From them. 

Blowing out a breath, she shakes her head. “You’re—you’re right.”

Vai rolls her eyes. “Of course, I’m right.” She gives a playful smirk, lightly nudging the other woman. “You may be the smart one, but I have my moments, too.”

A light, bitter chuckle. “I don’t know too much about smart anymore.” 

Vai gasps. “No way. No way will I let the smartest, prettiest, finest girl I know talk down to herself.” She points to the mirror, ordering, “assume the position.”

Solana sighs. ‘Vai, no—”

“I don’t want to hear it,” Vai objects, starting to push Solana in the direction of the wall of mirrors. “Come on.” Solana gasps when Vai’s hand comes down on her ass. “Get to it.”

“Vai—”

“Fine,” she relents, pulling out her phone from the small Chanel bag on her shoulder. Tapping on the screen, Solana rolls her eyes as the music fills the bathroom. 

I am healthy, I am wealthy

I am rich, I am that bitch (Yeah)

I am gonna go get that bag

And I am not gonna take your shit (Uh)

“Vai!” Solana giggles when Vai climbs up on the counter and starts twerking, rapping along with Baby Tate. “You are so bad! We’re in a church.”

“I can’t hear you,” she ignores Solana’s protest, moving off the counter to grab her phone, opening up Snapchat to record them. Her influence pays off as she dances on Solana, eventually peer pressuring her best friend since elementary school in joining her for the singing. 

It’s a silly little thing that truly lifts Solana’s spirits. Helping her feel a little more hopeful and a lot less helpless. 

—--------

It’s painful.

All of it. For a variety of reasons. The biggest and most impactful of which largely due to the 6’3 man who makes intermittent eye contact with her throughout the entire evening. Even as her sister walks down the aisle during the ceremony rehearsal, Solana can feel his gaze on her instead of his bride to be. 

And, it takes everything in her to not run off, simply rub at her eyes to avoid anyone from finding out her tears are far from the happy ones shed by her mother at the thought of this all being finalized in just a few days.

The thought alone makes Solana sick to her stomach. 

Just like any time she catches a glimpse of Sam holding onto Roman’s arm, laughing unnecessarily loud as they interact with other attendees. More her than Roman. Solana knows better than anyone how he’d much rather be anywhere other than here.

She knows, because she feels the same. 

And because there’s nothing more truly mind fucking than seeing her sister harp on and fawn over a man who just this morning was in Solana’s bed, fucking her, whispering all the sweet, sinful things that should be reserved for his fiancé.

Not his fiancé's little sister.

But, as already stated, the whole situation is just fucked up. 

And it somehow becomes significantly worse during the rehearsal dinner. 

They’re in the midst of toasts, Solana’s parents standing to offer their insincere words of support for the marriage. Insincere because they truly only care about the wealth and status that will be afforded to the family once Samantha becomes not only a Reigns, but thee Reigns. 

The wife of the Tribal Chief.

Just thinking it makes Solana sick to her stomach. 

Not as sick, however, as she feels the minute Jey literally stumbles into the dining room. His eyes are glazed, a silly look on his face, bottle of Hennessy in one hand, mic in the other.

And just like that, Solana knows shit is about to go from bad to inconceivably worse.

“Hey, hey, hey,” he starts off with a sly smile. “I heard—I heard we wishing good luck to the happy couple, right?”

The worry spreads across the room, including Vai who sits beside Solana wearing a trepidatious expression. “Oh no….”

Oh no is exactly what it is. 

“Look, congratulations, Big Dog. Got you a bad one. Samantha fucking Miller. Fine ass been fine like goddamn.” For some reason, Solana finds her gaze falling on Roman who sits there, unlike almost everyone else, unworried and clearly pissed off. 

Jey is in the middle of the room, brows furrowing. “I just got a question though.” He then points between Roman and Samantha with the clearly empty bottle. “How you gon be married to her—” the bottle shifts to Solana. “—when you fucking her?” He laughs to himself, as Solana feels her soul slip away from her. “Matter of fact, how you gon be married to her when you done knocked up her sister?” 

Never in Solana’s 26 years has she been so mortified to have so many sets of eyes on her, all presenting with the same level of shock and disgust. 

As if knowing she’s seconds away from panicking and causing an even bigger scene than what’s occurring, Vai reaches to grab and gently squeeze Solana’s hand.

If only that did any fucking thing.

“Wait, shit, my bad. It might not even be your baby, cause she been fucking the both of us!” Eyes shutting, heart crumbling, Solana has never felt so low. “So hell, maybe I’m the daddy!”

“But, hey, look! Solana!” Jey continues to talk, even as Jimmy and Solo are attempting to get the mic from him. “I got a surprise, too! Guess who also pregnant?” He tosses the bottle to the ground, shattering it, causing a group of the guests to gasp. “Nicki!” Breathing isn’t something Solana is certain she’s even capable of anymore, as an inebriated Jey continues to twist the knife. “So not only is my wife pregnant, but my side bitch might be carrying my baby too—”

Roman seems to come out of fucking nowhere, tackling Jey to the ground, immediately beating on him. And from there, even more chaos, security and other family members attempting to pry the cousins apart. Guests looking around and at the scene before them with all the bewilderment.

“You fucking whore!”

That’s all Solana hears before she’s grabbed by her hair and dragged out of her seat, thrown to the ground. There’s only seconds between Samantha going to kick her and Vai jumping out of her seat, tackling Samantha, effectively keeping her away from her intended target.

“I wish you fucking would touch her, you bony ass cunt!”

And because Vai is an actual Reigns, the baby sister of the Tribal chief, the princess of the Bloodline, security is by her in seconds, ready to defend if need be. 

Meanwhile, Nina and Xavier are rushing by to check on Samantha, helping her to her feet, Nina’s horrified gaze on her youngest daughter. “Solana. Tell me….tell me it’s not true.”

Xavier’s gaze is less judgmental, almost sympathetic. “Sweetheart….”

Solana can only cry, struggling to get back to her feet, ignoring the brawling around her. It’s not nearly as heavy as the scene before her. “Daddy, I—”

“Of course, it’s true!” Samantha shouts, Nina having to restrain her daughter. “That’s why she’s gotten so fat! She’s pregnant!” 

“Samantha, please,” Xavier sighs, running a hand over his face. Vai moves to help Solana stand, hand on the small of her back. “Solana Miller, don’t lie to us. Is this….is this true? Are you…..are you…..are you really pregnant with—with Roman’s child?”

In all the ways this unfortunate set of news could have been broken, for it to be laid out so publicly and brutally, it’s something she would have never foreseen.

Ever. 

And with all the regret—and embarrassment—in the world, Solana answers, “I don’t—” She closes her eyes, never in her life feeling so much shame. “I don’t know if he’s the the father—”

“Oh my God,” is all Nina can say, hands covering her mouth, thus freeing Samantha who goes to swing for Solana once more. Vai, however, is having none of it. She jumps in front of her best friend without an ounce of hesitation. 

“Hit me, bitch! Let me see you do it!” She challenges, knowing full and well, even with her rage, Samantha isn’t stupid enough to try anything. Not with a slew of security ready to make the upcoming wedding a funeral real fast.

If there even still is a wedding. 

“How could you do this to us?” Nina demands, anger overpowering shock. “To your sister?” Solana would give anything to not exist in this moment. Anything at all. “What kind of whore have you become?”

“Nina,” Xavier says in an almost quiet voice. Solana would appreciate the almost sign of defense if not for his next question. “Why have you not terminated it?”

It’s a question Solana isn’t entirely surprised by, but it’s the way he asks, the fact that he’s asking now, even as the crowd has started to disperse, security directing people near the exits, that stuns her.

“I don’t—”

Samantha scoffs, eyes wide. “You’re not keeping that thing!”

“Samantha. Calm down.”

Xavier’s words seem to do the complete opposite. “Calm down? This whore fucked my fiance! And now she’s potentially carrying his baby, and you want me to calm down?”

“Yes, because if you don’t, I’m about to beat the shit out of you,” Vai cuts in, unafraid to be the mouthpiece Solana clearly needs at this moment. She looks toward Xavier and Nina. “This isn’t the time or place for this conversation.”

“This doesn’t concern you, Vai,” Nina’s objection is cold and her stare is icy. “This is a family matter.”

“Solana is basically my family, and the baby she’s carrying is either my niece, nephew, or my little cousin, so yes, it absolutely does concern me.”

Vai reaches for Solana’s hand, making one final statement. “Another time.”

And without giving anyone a chance to beat down more on Solana than she was already beating on herself, Vai guides them out of the place, just as Solana catches Roman’s intense eyes burning into her as he moves in their direction.

It only makes Solana walk away faster.

—-----

There aren’t words accurate and applicable enough to describe just what emotions are coursing through Solana’s body. Not as she empties her stomach over the toilet, only partially due to morning sickness. Not as she cries into her best friend’s chest, Vai doing her best to offer words of support and comfort. And certainly not as Solana takes in the gravity of what just occurred.

Not only has her pregnancy been outed in front of everyone, but to make matters worse, she’s completely humiliated her family. 

Samantha’s dislike of her was already magnanimous. Now, her hatred will be unfathomable. 

And her parents…..

God, Solana will never be able to wipe away the memory of their disappointment as they looked at her. They were already on shaky terms following her taking a year off from medical school, something that was met with disagreement and judgment. But this?

This is an entirely different ballpark. One that she doesn’t know how to navigate her way out of. 

So, she’ll do the only thing she can in such a situation.

She’ll run. 

Solana was already planning to leave, to go stay with her grandmother for a month after the wedding. But now….

Now, even if there is still a wedding, there’s no way in hell she can attend. That she’s even still invited. 

Samantha would soon rather kill her than see her present on that big day.

And because Vai truly is the guardian angel Solana was blessed with, she agreed to accompany Solana on the trip that's now been moved up, citing she’d rather be chewed alive by a pack of rabid dogs than sit there and watch “that bitch and my brother exchange vows.”

A sentiment that Solana partially shares, as she’s been doing her best to prepare herself mentally for that sight. 

Just the thought of it has her eyes watering yet again as she folds another dress and packs it into her suitcase. 

The silence of the apartment doesn’t help the bombardment of thoughts in her head. So many racing thoughts that have her wishing she hadn’t told Vai she’d be okay until morning where they would board one of the Reigns’ private jets and head to Mexico.

And while a welcomed escape, it’s not her preferred destination.

No, given what’s occurred, Solana would prefer to head to Georgia. To spend time away from it all with Trick, her older half brother, his wife, Ashanti, and Solana’s “aunt” Melody, Trick’s biological mother. The woman who’s been more supportive and loving than Solana’s own biological mother at points.

She knows she’d find nothing but support from the older woman. And would from her brother as well, who’s always been there for her, if not for the fact that Jey is one of his good friends, and thus this situation would potentially put a wall between them.

But, even more, Trick and Roman hate each other, and Solana would not be surprised if her brother literally tried to kill Roman. 

So yet, another mess that this situation has created. Not only has she messed up a marriage before it began, potentially ruined an almost lifelong friendship, heightened a decades long feud but also interfered with an actual marriage.

Because Nicki, Jey’s wife, being pregnant is something she could have never seen coming. He told her they were separated, that he was finally done with her. And Solana believed him.

The same way he believed her when she told him she was done wanting Roman, even if she was lying through her teeth and knew it at the moment. Was just too weak to be honest with him. 

And herself, to some extent.

Additional tears fall freely as Solana moves to her dresser to pull out more clothes when she hears the doorbell. A glance at the clock on her nightstand reveals it’s almost 11pm. Too late for any visitors. If this was an average day.

But today was far from average.

Solana heads out of her room and to the front door where she leans up to look out the peephole, instantly regretting it.

Feet flat on the ground, eyes closed, her first instinct is to ignore him. To leave him outside for however long it takes for him to go away.

But, she also knows him. Knows that he’d kick the damn door down if that was what it took to see her. 

It’s why, against her better judgment, for the second time today, she lets him in. 

And as soon as she unlocks and opens the door, she brings her eyes to where he stands before her, expression filled with concern, no sign of him being involved in such a violent scuffle earlier. 

That means Jey got the short of the stick. 

Yet again. 

“What are you doing here?” Solana redirects her attention and focuses on the door instead of the intense way he’s looking at her.

His answer is instant. “I needed to check on you.” 

It’s the needed that makes her chuckle bitterly. “Just leave, Roman.”

“No.” An expected answer. As long as she’s known him, Roman has never responded well with being told what to do. “Not until I’m sure you’re alright.”

And, it’s that infuriating alright that makes her snap her focus back on him. “Alright?” Just saying it leaves a bitter aftertaste in her mouth. “Roman, nothing about what has happened is alright.” 

He swallows. “I know.”

“No, you don’t,” she counters, the emotion building back up. “Because it wasn’t you who was humiliated tonight in front of everyone, Roman. It was me.” 

His expression hardens just slightly. “This shit involves me too, Solana.”

Her grip on the door tightens as she lays out for him the double standards he seems to not understand. “Roman. You’re the man who’ll get props for fucking sisters. I’m the whore who doesn’t even know who the father of her baby is.”

His eyes shift from irritated to something almost soft at the ending part of her sentence. “It’s my baby, Sol.” 

She feels such a mixture of frustration and appreciation for that one sentence. “You don’t know that, Roman. You shouldn’t want that.” Even if she also wants that. Doesn’t matter. It’s wrong. “This whole situation is so messed up, and the fact that you don’t see it just shows how unaffected you are by it all.”

“How the hell am I not affected by this, Solana?” His anger is rising, the two somehow moving from by the door to the interior of her apartment, near the living room. “Am I not in the middle of this, too?”

She scoffs, throwing her hands up and pointing at him. “You know what, you’re right, you are in the middle, because you started all of this!”

He pauses. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

Solana presses her fingers to her temples, expressing aloud, “God, I wish you just left me alone.” And to emphasize the accountability on both parts, she admits, “I should have left you alone.”

A brief moment of silence followed up with a quiet, “you don’t mean that.”

“Of course, I mean it!” She shouts, gesturing around the room. “Roman, look at what’s happened. Nothing good has come out of this. My sister, who already hated me, is never going to forgive me. My parents have threatened to disown me if I keep this baby.” Just recalling the long, ultimatum of a text message she received has the tears brewing again. ‘That’s why—why I can’t.”

Roman’s shoulders drop. “Can't what?”

And for the first time since being backed into decision-making corner, Solana says aloud, “I’ve decided to put the baby up for adoption.”

Silence

It’s the longest bout of it that’s existed between herself and the man before her. 

Shaking his head, Roman takes a step toward her, voice low but firm, “Solana, you….you can’t do that.”

Backing away and wiping at her wet eyes, she affirms, “yes, I can, and I will.”

It seems her answer triggers another set of anger for him. “The hell, you can.”

Looking away, Solana finds herself sharing some of the things she had to consider when coming to this decision. “Roman, what kind of life would this baby have?” An honest, fair question she’s asked herself since finding out she was pregnant. An answer she’s finally come to after the events of tonight. “If it’s yours, he or she will just be the shunned bastard child of the Tribal Chief with a step mother who would never accept them.” She crosses her arms, playing out the alternative. “And even if it’s Jey’s, he or she isn't much better off dealing with Nicki as a step-mother.” A sure shitfest of a situation, given everything she knows about Jey’s wife. “It’s wrong to bring a child into this mess!”

Roman, as always, shows no signs of backing down, matching her volume. “It’s our child!”

“Stop saying that!” She snaps, loosing the already limited control she held with her emotions. “You don’t know that! Until we can get a paternity test—”

“I don’t care what the fucking test says!” He shouts. “This is my child!”

Solana’s eyes shut. Just like that. Just like that she’s taken back to all the moments shared between him. Those memories that showed a different side of the man known as the Head of the Table. A softer, vulnerable man. A loving man. 

A man who’d do anything for her.

Even claim a child that’s not even biologically his. 

“Roman…..” Her voice is significantly quieter, but her determination is unwavering. “I can’t be a mother right now.” She just can’t. “I’m supposed to be finishing medical school next year. I—I have plans—”

And once again, another wave of anger with both harsh and cruel delivery. “They’re not even your fucking plans, Solana. Those are your parents' plans because you’re too goddamn scared to stand up to them and be honest with yourself.”

She’s less taken back by his tone and more the words. “What is that supposed to mean?” 

Roman doesn’t hesitate or stutter as he explains, ever so clearly, “it means you keep living your life for others instead of yourself. Doing what you think makes everyone else happy instead of yourself.”

If not for this whole situation, Solana might be able to acknowledge the truth in those words. Recognize how a lifetime of feeling never enough has created a tremendous amount of people pleasing. 

But, this isn’t that. 

Her voice is pointed and tight. “I tried to do what makes me happy and look where it got me.” A powerful, telling statement followed by the heartbreaking acknowledgment of all that’s been destroyed. “Look what it’s cost me.”

His eyes soften as he attempts to comfort her. “Baby—”

Solana turns away and shares what, in hindsight, she should probably keep to herself. “I can’t—I can’t stay here anymore, Roman. I—I need time to—”

He cuts her off, asking almost urgently. “What do you mean you can’t stay here?” When she says nothing, he asks directly, “you’re leaving?”

Solana looks away, unable to handle whatever his nonverbal response is. “Yes.” She closes her eyes, sharing, “I’m—I’m going to stay with my abuela for a little while—”

“Solana, please—”

“I can’t stay here anymore.”

“We can figure this out—”

“It’s too—it’s too hard—”

“I can’t lose you—”

“It’s never going to work, Roman!” She yells, once again losing the battle with her emotions. Watery eyes on him, she pours out all of her emotions. “You are marrying my sister! You’re going to make her your wife! She will give you and be the mother of your children. Not me.”

“How many fucking times do I have to tell you that I don’t want her?” There’s an almost blunt coldness to his rhetorical question. But, it’s contrasted and negated as he steps toward her once more. Solana doesn’t back away this time. “I want you.”

Her eyes close once more, almost on their own accord as his hands move to her face. 

“I love you,” he breathes. Whispered, sacred words spoken against her closed lids as his grasp on her waist tightens just not enough. “And, I need you….”

“Roman,” she whispers, unable to stop herself from moving her hands to his chest, fingers grasping at the soft material of his shirt. “We—we can’t.”

He doesn’t say anything, the same way she doesn’t say or do anything when he hikes her up on his waist and walks them back to her bedroom. 

“You can’t leave me.” An almost pleading tone laces his words, a weight to them that matches the light weight of him on top of her as he lays her down on the bed and hovers over her slightly.

His hands moving under her shirt, his big hand rubbing over her small baby bump. An act he seems to do every time this happens between them ever since it appeared almost overnight a couple weeks ago. “Roman, n—”

“Please don’t leave,” he all but begs, effectively pulling her shirt over head, tossing it to the floor. Mouth back on hers, he breathes against her lips, “stay with me.”

Her eyes shut are clenched shut as he continues to tug her clothes off, followed by his until they’re in a crumpled pile on the floor that’s similar to the crumpled, pathetic thing that is her resolve.

“You can never leave me, Sol.” It’s another desperate plea that tumbles out his mouth at the same time he enters her, her mouth falling open at that delicious, addictive stretch. 

“Roman….” Nails pressed into his back, thighs tightened around his waist, the resolve is all but desolate.

“Mine,” he vows, restricting her hands above her head, claiming her lips in a possessive, needy kiss. “Tell me,” he presses his forehead against hers. “Tell me you love me.”

And as much as she would love to deny him that, to deny him something, she can’t. Not that. Never that.

“I love you,” she whimpers, overwhelmed and overcome with it all. 

Because she does.

Because as wrong as it is, Solana loves this man. Loves the man she can never have, and it’s that part of it that has her determined to follow through with her plan.

Because loving in him is nothing but a dead-end to heartbreak. 

So, tonight, she’ll have this. Have him once more. One last time. Because come morning, this time, it’ll be him who wakes up alone.

[shukraastro]

Vedic Astrology - Future Spouse Prediction: Appearance (+ Traits) part 2

In the previous post I gave examples for the physical attributes and influences of the planets and some Nakshatras. In this post I will give some more traits which I came to find out trough a mixture of research from other astrologers/websites and own my observations of charts I have analized and done readings on. So I will try my best to summarize them as much as I can. And again I can only highly recommend you to watch yt channels of various vedic astrologers. The information you will gather from them is gold. I might do a post next time where I give you links to all the vedic astrology channels on yt.

Btw, apologies if my post is lacking some structure, because I really don't know where to start cuz the results of all these combinations of planets+planets or planets+nakshatras are really a lot, so I sometimes get lost. So you might notice that I forget to mentions something and then might add them later on. So sorry for that. Now let's start🌟

Techniques: I have noticed that when it comes to the appearance, we're prominently influenced by our Moon Nakshatra, Ascendant Nakshatra and Atmakaraka Nakshatra. The traits and influences of these placements will be very visible in the appearance. Now when it comes to the spouses appearance we have to consider every spouse indicator placements first and not only in the D1 chart or only in D9 chart but in both of them. As discussed in the previous post, we have to look at the 7th house, the planets in the 7th house (especially the Nakshatra), where the 7th lord is placed at. Another thing I have observed is that the sign, nakshatra and planet influence will tell you about the physical traits and then counting the house placements in that will give you information about their personality traits, career, talents, hobbies, family, house and all that. (Planets in signs and houses can also give informations about the physical traits, but for that I will make another post because that is a totally different technique.) However, then we look at the Darakaraka planet in both charts in which Nakshatra it's placed in. I have also noticed that in the case of the appearance Venus and Jupiter placements can also give more insight into the appearance of the spouse. Venus about the wife and Jupiter about the husband, for that we have to consider the aspects, what planets are making aspects, especially conjunctions and mutual aspects (a mutual aspect is an opposition). Also another thing I came to realize is... now some people may disagree on this but I have seen this in quite some few charts... Look at the Nakshatra of your Atmakaraka planet in the D9 chart. I have seen that the spouse can majorly carry the traits of that Nakshatra, I still haven't figured out the reason behind that and it's frustrating me because I would really like to understand that. But it is something which I have seen (not always but) quite frequently in charts of married people, that they embody the traits from the Nakshatra in which their spouses Atmakaraka is placed in the D9 chart.

Planets + Nakshatra influence examples:

As I already mentioned the physical traits of the Moon, I want to explain to you guys how the Moon in some Nakshatras can give the opposite result, for example Moon in Chitra can give a very lean and tall appearance, I have seen this play out in charts of some individuals themselves or in the appearance of their spouse when Moon was the Darakaraka: Adriana Lima (Chitra Moon), Elsa Hosk (Chitra Moon), Justin Bieber (Chitra Moon Darakaraka) Hailey is very lean and tall. If Venus is in Chitra... then it really depends on the gender, because Chitra is half in Virgo half in Libra but the Nakshatra ruler is Mars. So here you have to apply some math and also understand the values of Venus deeply. In both signs Virgo and Libra a man will be athletic and slim, because of the Mars influence. But if we talk about women, Venus in Chitra loves to look voluptious and feminine and in Virgo Venus is debilitated. It will give a beauty with flaws and imperfections, because Venus will challenge the sign of Virgo, because Virgo is so obsessed with perfection. Venus won't give that in the Virgo sign, Venus wants Virgo to prove that they can truly love someone with all their imperfections. And as I mentioned in the previous post Chitra can give stretch marks somewhere on the body in women (Chitra is the female tiger). So Venus in Chitra will give curves, maybe a little bit of a full belly, just think about the painting of Aphrodite coming out of the sea shell, Aphrodite is always depicted to have a roundish belly. And in Virgo especially the imperfections will be more amplified, it can give the stretch marks, or scars in the face or imperfect teeth (now they may or may not want to perfect these physical flaws, that's another thing). For Darakaraka/7th lord/Venus or Jupiter in Rahu/Ketu ruled Nakshatras (Rahu: Ardra, Swati, Shatabhishak & Ketu: Ashwini, Magha, Mula) you need to look where Rahu or Ketu is placed in which Nakshatra, because Rahu and Ketu are not physical planets, they do not have a shape or form so in such a case DK/7th lord/Venus/Jupiter if placed in these Nakshatras, will draw traits from their dispositor. For example: Darakaraka is Moon in Mula, Moon traits will be present, Mula traits will be present. Ketu on its own doesn't carry many traits, it will give the exoticness and the unconventional traits, but mostly it will give traits from it's own Nakshatra placement. Let's say Ketu is placed in Purva Phalguni, then Pruva Phalguni traits will be present. And I have seen this strongly play out in the D1 chart. Every method plays out very differently, some are very accurate in the D1 but not in D9 and vise versa or some methods are accurate for both charts.

I should do a seperate post on planets in Nakshatras and their influences to share some observations. Because I can't just limit them only on the physical appearance. The influences go way beyond that. I hope I could give you a look from a different perspective. Like I said these are some of the results I have seen and have worked in my analysis when I looked at charts of family, friends and relatives as well as some celebrity charts.

Thanks for reading🌺

[bearw-me]

Can we have poly Asmodeus and fizarolli with a s/o who's a k-pop idol ?

my first polyyyy i'm so excited! bless anon!

𝐀𝐬𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐮𝐬 + 𝐅𝐢𝐳𝐳𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢 𝐏𝐨𝐥𝐲!𝐇𝐜𝐬

𐐒 ft : (poly!) asmodeus x kpop idol!reader x fizzarolli 𐐒 cw : fluff, cuddling, slight angst 𐐒 summary : general hcs! 𐐒 note : may i be the first to say this was the most wholesome-heart squeezing thing ive ever written/imagined

Asmodeus arranges shows for you in his club in the Lust Ring, if you have time, and they are special events he doesn't host very often (mostly because he adores you and wants you to be shown off, but also because he hates the way his sinners view you in the Lust Ring: objectively)

He LOVES singing with you

Fizzarolli is the one to attend ALL your shows, waving his light sticks in the air happily, probably cheering the loudest.

Asmodeus doesn't really like PDA unless its for his shows or a performance out of respect for your public image, but Fizz is a little more weary, mostly because (like in the show) he doesn't want to be the one to drag the two of you down

They both LOVE your dances and choreography, and the fact you allow them to have opinions on your outfits.

Cuddle Hcs: Asmodeus loves to be in the middle, holding the two of your smaller bodies against him or both next to him on one side (he can definitely manage to wrap his arms around you both, so he does) and Fizz just likes having you both near him, having the smell and warmth of you both close is enough to have him finally fall asleep

If you're off on tour, Fizz has to call you every night and check in, holding you on the phone until you absolutely can't talk to him anymore (bonus if you just fall asleep with him and he can hear you snoring. it melts his heart) and he turns to Asmodeus until you're back

Despite being popular in hell themselves, Asmodeus and Fizz never actually try to "take advantage" of your fame, only support you when you need it

Your literal husbands

Fizz is clingy, while Asmodeus is a more possessive/jealous type

but also don't think Fizz will just stand there and let some guy try to eye-f*ck you either (he WILL strangle someone)

Asmodeus has a tattoo, or a mark on his chest, for the two of you

Fizz would love to manage your socials if you asked it of him (or give you opinions on your 'best' pictures)

Surprisingly, Asmodeus is the one who wears your merch (the most), mostly as a sleepy shirt, but he would wear it under his usual three-piece suit if he didn't feel like dressing that day

I feel like (obviously) As would rehearse your songs with you, giving you feedback on your notes and tone while you sang, While Fizz would help you with choreo!

Fizz likes to cuddle with you in bed, snuggling his face into your chest and vent about the day or what bothers him

Asmodeus loves to be involved with your career and brings you things you might need like body glitter or getting your nails done, even bringing you socks that match your outfit better.

The poly relationship would work really well, and Asmodeus and Fizz could really depend on each other when one of them wasn't their for you.

As feels like he needs to protect and be there for the two of you, and gets anxious or apprehensive when he's not there with you both

And Fizz knows he can depend on the both of you, comforted even if you both weren't physically there to hug him

[makingspiritualityreal]

9th and 12th Houses - How Far is Foreign?

An insight, that adds to depth of understanding of Astrology through diving into Vedic resources is the change in perception between the 12th and the 9th house.

In popular Astrology circles, both of these houses are commonly associated with foreign lands. However, as you explore the meaning of these houses more, you begin to understand them deeper in polarity with their opposite.

The actual house of foreign, far away travel (or relocation, depending on the chart) is the 9th house. That is because the 9th house is the opposite of the 3rd house.

Say you are European, and you lived your whole life in Europe, and you travelled around different European countries to explore the continent. This is the 3rd house. It is the expansion beyond your local home country into exploring its nearest cultural environment, and at the end of such a pilgrimage, you end up with a personal understanding of your individual, cultural identity, which moves you to its emotional interpretation in the 4th house.

But then lets say you travel or move from Europe to Asia, either of the American continents, Australia…take your pick. This is the activation of the 9th house. Because you are no longer exploring just the back yard of a culture with a certain degree of similarity, you are entering a completely new physical world.

This is why houses 9, 10 and 11, and 12th to an extent, are found in charts of famous people. You need to be able to participate in an energy, an idea, that is going to spread into foreign lands to truly be famous. This applies even if we’re talking about online success, which is the way people get recognition nowadays. Otherwise, you are at best a local singer on your continent or your country’s music festival. There is nothing wrong with that of course, as many people love to contribute to their community and they’re happy doing so, but it’s still an accurate observation. You need to be able to go far away, not strictly physically but energetically, to touch a variety of people from many cultures.

You might wonder, how does the 12th house fit into this? Clearly, it’s part of the whole 9th, 10th, 11th and 12th house group, so it should also rule foreign lands. But the 12th house is actually more than that. The 12th house rules a fantastical, foreign idea, that might not necessarily be grounded in the immediate physical, but is nevertheless energetically real and can be accessed from anywhere. It’s the idea of the collective emotional consciousness, that may not have the most quick and obvious material manifestation but is nevertheless a very real thing existing within this Universe.

Up until the 11th house, through 9th and 10th, we are dealing with more or less tangible ideas regarding foreign lands. Let’s say in the 9th house you relocated to a completely foreign culture, in the 10th house you found a way to tangibly join the most prominent physical environment of the world through that culture, in the 11th house you met some of the most prominent, affluent people in the world. I don’t have any 11th house planets, but to give you an idea of how it works, my husband has Venus conjunct Mars in the 11th house, we live in the Las Vegas area, and he plays sports and is casually friendly with some of the wealthiest people in the world, who own successful businesses, own several properties across the world, and spend a lot of their time either making a lot of money or travelling the world, or both. We are not one of those people, but it should give you an idea of what the 11th house is. It’s the creme de la creme of the physical world. I don’t personally interact much with these people, as they are my husband’s friends, not mine, and I don’t play sports with them, but I have a deep awareness of how advanced socially and financially this particular group is, having travelled to many poorer parts of the world. There are people in this world, starving, so in comparison to them, the 11th house society is the top 1% of 1%.

You might think, well, the 11th house is everything, so how can the 12th house be more? The 12th house is more because it sells something even the 11th house people can’t resist, it sells the ultimate fantasy.

In the 12th house we move on to people so wealthy, they barely even interact with others. We move to intangible concepts, physical areas and objects, that provoke people to spend obscene amounts of money simply due to some idea. The 12th house is not just real foreign travel like the 9th house, it is the embodiment of the realisation of all fantasies. That is why Venus is so happy in the 12th house, because it enjoys the ultimate idea of fantastical luxury.

The foreign area that we travel to in the 12th house is not this globe, it is deep inside us. By the time we realise all our fantasies in the 11th house we can feel tired, or even jaded. But in the 12th house we are stimulated to all of our secret, hidden desires being provoked and coming true. This can be done not only within our home, within our room, but completely within our minds. Those, who are successful in the 12th house are those, who made those fantasies concrete enough to realise them and live within them.

What if you could taste and smell the finest perfume created on this planet from purely natural oils? What if you could touch the finest fabrics, created in corners of the world you never even dreamed of? What if you could live this dream, every day, surrounded by an infinite kaleidoscope of the pinnacle of perfection achieved by our planet until this time? “What if?” is the exotic, “foreign”, “far away” dream of the 12th house, and a well realised 12th house is a dream come true.

To offer up an example, in the last few years, youtubers living in rural areas from all over the world have popped up on the internet, offering videos from their seemingly idyllic life. That is the definition of the 12th house fantasy, devoid of the actually reality of having to take the 9th house physical pilgrimage of travelling to rural China and enduring all the difficulties involved with facing the reality of such a location. It may seem idealised, yet the source material for filming is real, so while it may be distant from the viewers geographically, while it may cost the locals a lot of work, it is nevertheless part of an actual, existing reality.

This dream, that can seem excessive to a mundane mind, becomes even clearer in the context of the 12th house’s polarity, the 6th house. The 6th house is the tough battle of dealing with the ugliness and conflict of this world. That is the reality of this physical world for most of us, we get up every day and deal with conflicts, that we have in front of us. It is exhausting, and so the 12th house is everything that heals and soothes the pain of any conflict that ravaged us in the 6th house. It’s the world offering no resistance, it’s all boundaries being breached. After all, in our dreams, or fantasies, we want everything to be perfect and smooth.

Ironically enough, the karaka of the 12th house is Saturn. As someone with significant 12th house influence, it is pretty clear to me why. In order to have only the finest dream come true, to really live in a beautiful fantasy, one actually needs to do a lot of research, be picky, critical and have background expertise and know-how. Otherwise, even as just a consumer, you would be easily fooled, hoodwinked into a fake product, or end up overpaying on something, that is not worth the money you invest into it. Scrutiny of Saturn is necessary for our fantasies to be smooth. It is not something, that is given to us that easily. Saturn also rules isolation, and if the 9th house is foreign, the 12th house is the pinnacle of remote. The 9th house is what is foreign and exciting to us, mentally and physically, but the 12th house represents the most remote corners of both the physical world, and our minds.

This is why the 12th house is the furthest away from the 1st house, our basic, natural, physical life. Because the furthest thing on this planet is not just a foreign continent, it’s a journey inside our minds and emotions, the ability to blend discernment and internal surrender to divine perfection, that leads to manifestation. It is the full depth of untapped potential on the very bottom of our subconscious, a research and response to all collective energetic resources available on the planet, a gold mine waiting to be explored, exploited, and enjoyed. And it is tapping into this gold mine, that has the power to tempt, seduce, and attract people from all around the world into directing their energy towards us, even if we’re physically just sitting in our room, far away from them.

[thatscarletflycatcher]

The problem with discussions about Henry Crawford is that there are two different questions being asked at the same time: 1) Can Fanny reform Henry? and 2) Can Henry reform?

Austen answers negatively to the first one, but I'd argue she's very ambivalent in her answer to the second.

Austen is not in the habit of "punishing" her villains; none of them are struck by accidents of fortune or anything the like, but we commonly perceive the downgrade between what they could have had and what they end up having. Edward Ferrars is an infinitely preferrable husband to Robert Ferrars, but Lucy Steele never seems to become aware of that fact. Isabella tries to get Captain Tilney over James Morland. Mr. Elliot is not crying by the corners over the fact that he lost Anne Elliot. Even Willoughby's regret is not about Marianne's actual goodness, but his personal convenience. Austen's "villains" as a rule are morally stupid people.

When Aristotle says that no one can be good who is stupid, he doesn't have in mind things like being good at Math or being well read or quick-witted; he's thinking of a certain intuition, clear-sightedness about what is good, what contributes to human flourishing, and this seems to be a strong component of what Austen calls sense. Sense is almost convertible (if not completely) with prudence, and prudence is a rather intuitive virtue, as it regulates the when, the how, the how much, etc of the other moral virtues. (and there goes my first thesis topic that I never did!).

In that way it is interesting that only 4 characters are said to possess sense in Mansfield Park: Edmund, Fanny, Henry, and Tom (and Tom doesn't even fully count, because his is expressed negatively: instead of having sense, he doesn't lack it). Here are the Henry instances:

"He did not want them to die of love; but with sense and temper which ought to have made him judge and feel better, he allowed himself great latitude on such points." "Henry Crawford had too much sense not to feel the worth of good principles in a wife, though he was too little accustomed to serious reflection to know them by their proper name; but when he talked of her having such a steadiness and regularity of conduct, such a high notion of honour, and such an observance of decorum as might warrant any man in the fullest dependence on her faith and integrity, he expressed what was inspired by the knowledge of her being well principled and religious." "That punishment, the public punishment of disgrace, should in a just measure attend his share of the offence is, we know, not one of the barriers which society gives to virtue. In this world the penalty is less equal than could be wished; but without presuming to look forward to a juster appointment hereafter, we may fairly consider a man of sense, like Henry Crawford, to be providing for himself no small portion of vexation and regret: vexation that must rise sometimes to self-reproach, and regret to wretchedness, in having so requited hospitality, so injured family peace, so forfeited his best, most estimable, and endeared acquaintance, and so lost the woman whom he had rationally as well as passionately loved."

(I'm not counting the one time Edmund calls him a man of sense, and the one time Sir Thomas does the same, for obvious contextual reasons).

It's not only interesting that he is the only rake to be called a man of sense by the narrator (Mrs. Smith calling Mr. Elliot a man of sense in Persuasion is clearly not meant to be taken straight), but that it is always specifically tied to moral perceptiveness; he was morally perceptive enough to know he shouldn't have played the way he did, and he chose to ignore it. He perceives Fanny's moral worth, and it is the core reason why he wants to marry her.* He also perceives William's moral worth as something both good and desirable:

"To Henry Crawford they gave a different feeling. He longed to have been at sea, and seen and done and suffered as much. His heart was warmed, his fancy fired, and he felt the highest respect for a lad who, before he was twenty, had gone through such bodily hardships and given such proofs of mind. The glory of heroism, of usefulness, of exertion, of endurance, made his own habits of selfish indulgence appear in shameful contrast; and he wished he had been a William Price, distinguishing himself and working his way to fortune and consequence with so much self-respect and happy ardour, instead of what he was!"

Both here and at the end of the novel, Henry's moral perceptiveness leads to remorse for his own moral wrongdoings. Compare this to Willoughby's regret over Marianne:

"Willoughby could not hear of her marriage without a pang; and his punishment was soon afterwards complete in the voluntary forgiveness of Mrs. Smith, who, by stating his marriage with a woman of character, as the source of her clemency, gave him reason for believing that had he behaved with honour towards Marianne, he might at once have been happy and rich. That his repentance of misconduct, which thus brought its own punishment, was sincere, need not be doubted;—nor that he long thought of Colonel Brandon with envy, and of Marianne with regret. But that he was for ever inconsolable, that he fled from society, or contracted an habitual gloom of temper, or died of a broken heart, must not be depended on—for he did neither. He lived to exert, and frequently to enjoy himself. His wife was not always out of humour, nor his home always uncomfortable; and in his breed of horses and dogs, and in sporting of every kind, he found no inconsiderable degree of domestic felicity."

This sense/moral perceptiveness of Henry Crawford, and his experiencing remorse for his own wrongdoings sets him apart from the other Austen rakes. He's also not a drinker or a gambler; he does take at least minimal care of Everingham ("Everingham could not do without him in the beginning of September. He went for a fortnight") and did some modifications to it as soon as he got it. The same way Darcy's character is revealed as we see Pemberley, so the inflexion point of Henry's redemption attempt is his trying to become a better master of his estate:

For her approbation, the particular reason of his going into Norfolk at all, at this unusual time of year, was given. It had been real business, relative to the renewal of a lease in which the welfare of a large and—he believed—industrious family was at stake. He had suspected his agent of some underhand dealing; of meaning to bias him against the deserving; and he had determined to go himself, and thoroughly investigate the merits of the case. He had gone, had done even more good than he had foreseen, had been useful to more than his first plan had comprehended, and was now able to congratulate himself upon it, and to feel that in performing a duty, he had secured agreeable recollections for his own mind. He had introduced himself to some tenants whom he had never seen before; he had begun making acquaintance with cottages whose very existence, though on his own estate, had been hitherto unknown to him. This was aimed, and well aimed, at Fanny. It was pleasing to hear him speak so properly; here he had been acting as he ought to do. To be the friend of the poor and the oppressed! Nothing could be more grateful to her; and she was on the point of giving him an approving look, when it was all frightened off by his adding a something too pointed of his hoping soon to have an assistant, a friend, a guide in every plan of utility or charity for Everingham: a somebody that would make Everingham and all about it a dearer object than it had ever been yet. She turned away, and wished he would not say such things. She was willing to allow he might have more good qualities than she had been wont to suppose. She began to feel the possibility of his turning out well at last; but he was and must ever be completely unsuited to her, and ought not to think of her.

I have half an idea of going into Norfolk again soon. I am not satisfied about Maddison. I am sure he still means to impose on me if possible, and get a cousin of his own into a certain mill, which I design for somebody else. I must come to an understanding with him. I must make him know that I will not be tricked on the south side of Everingham, any more than on the north: that I will be master of my own property. I was not explicit enough with him before. The mischief such a man does on an estate, both as to the credit of his employer and the welfare of the poor, is inconceivable. I have a great mind to go back into Norfolk directly, and put everything at once on such a footing as cannot be afterwards swerved from. Maddison is a clever fellow; I do not wish to displace him, provided he does not try to displace me; but it would be simple to be duped by a man who has no right of creditor to dupe me, and worse than simple to let him give me a hard-hearted, griping fellow for a tenant, instead of an honest man, to whom I have given half a promise already. Would it not be worse than simple? Shall I go? Do you advise it?” “I advise! You know very well what is right.” “Yes. When you give me your opinion, I always know what is right. Your judgment is my rule of right.” “Oh, no! do not say so. We have all a better guide in ourselves, if we would attend to it, than any other person can be.

This is even more hammered in by the narrator: "Had he done as he intended, and as he knew he ought, by going down to Everingham after his return from Portsmouth, he might have been deciding his own happy destiny."

All these elements seem to point towards his being redeemable; he almost managed it! If only he'd gone to Everingham instead of London, catastrophic failure would have been averted! And yet at the same time we are told this:

Henry Crawford, ruined by early independence and bad domestic example, indulged in the freaks of a cold-blooded vanity a little too long. Once it had, by an opening undesigned and unmerited, led him into the way of happiness. Could he have been satisfied with the conquest of one amiable woman’s affections, could he have found sufficient exultation in overcoming the reluctance, in working himself into the esteem and tenderness of Fanny Price, there would have been every probability of success and felicity for him. His affection had already done something. Her influence over him had already given him some influence over her. Would he have deserved more, there can be no doubt that more would have been obtained, especially when that marriage had taken place, which would have given him the assistance of her conscience in subduing her first inclination, and brought them very often together. Would he have persevered, and uprightly, Fanny must have been his reward, and a reward very voluntarily bestowed, within a reasonable period from Edmund’s marrying Mary.

Ruined by early independence and bad domestic example. Mansfield Park is in a way a rather pessimist novel: it is a novel about education, and once your education has "set", your character is fixed, and your fate determined. Much of Maria and Julia's disgrace was also directly caused by their upbringing in a household where all importance was given to superficial qualities, and very little effective affection was shared; one can compare the restrained calm of Mansfield as a reflection of Sir Thomas' own unwillingness to see reality and give himself some discomfort in making others comfortable, with the bustle of the Musgrove household, and connect the dots to what makes the relationship between sisters Maria and Julia so different from the one between Louisa and Henrietta in similar situations.

In the end, it's a bit of a Schröedinger's cat situation. Can Henry reform? Yes, says Austen, he has the qualities needed for moral improvement, but no, his upbringing ruined him, and his character is fixed.

While this idea is the strongest in MP, it is present one way or another in all Austen's novels. Characters reforming is usually more about one specific quality or moral tone not being fine tuned than proper metanoia. Darcy was taught to do right, and did right; what he needed was to add proper humility and kindness to his practice. There is an exception, though, the one thing Charlotte Brontë and Jane Austen agree upon: a close brush with death is the best recipe for moral cure in the otherwise incurable.

Maybe the key is to wish Henry a good pneumonia, or a strong horsefall-induced concussion.

_____________

*On a side note, it's interesting that before he proposes, he considers how attached Fanny is to Mansfield, as undeserving as he thinks the Bertrams to be of her affection, and even draws a plan that contemplates giving her pleasure that way too: "I will not take her from Northamptonshire. I shall let Everingham, and rent a place in this neighbourhood; perhaps Stanwix Lodge."

[artethyst]

~ Leaves In A Sky Full Of Stars ~

Eris Vanserra x Rhysand’s Sister!Reader/OC

Eris had never seen his Mate so nervous- to talk to him, anyway.

Even when they had first met she had been nothing but a pain in his backside- a beautiful one no less.

“I have…news.” Came her voice, wavering as she played with her fingers, sliding the grand, shimmering ruby across her ceremonially ringed digit to soothe her.

“I suspect it is bad.” His teased, taking in her soft appearance, taught chest blossoming at the sight of his beloved.

She grinned, but there was a strange sadness to her eye which sent his own heart racing.

“It depends how you feel about it.”

He quirked a brow as she moved to him, perching herself over his thigh, her skirts brushing against his riding boots that were caked in mud.

“My Love, I am filthy-“

“When are you not?” She mocked lightly and he could only roll his eyes in return, gathering her trembling fingers in his own, warming them as he knew she liked.

Without a word she guided one of his calloused hands away from her own, placing it on her lower stomach as she remained perched on his lap.

He was perplexed until he felt it.

Their life force thrumming as one.

He looked at her incredulously and she bit her lip.

He couldn’t breathe.

“A-Another?” He swallowed thickly. “So…So soon?”

“Eri, he is almost four,” she tried to smile, but his gaze was too piercing, focused on her stomach- where their babe guiltlessly lay.

She knew what was wrong.

“He is hardly three,”

His resolve quickly diminished as he felt her disappointment through the bond, her sweet face falling at his words- ones he vowed to never hurt her with.

He heard her breath hitch and that was enough to break him.

“It…It is a blessing.” He breathed out, unconvincingly- but she knew better. “My Love, any child you give me is a greater gift than I could ever ask for-“

“Then why are you so scared?” Her voice was low as she traced his jaw, eyes glassy as he took a deep breath and counted.

One.

His father was dead. He couldn’t hurt her or the child- children.

Two.

She hadn’t died in childbirth. Madja had saved her. She was alive. Her and his firstborn son were okay.

Three-

“Eri…Talk to me…”

He hated this.

Himself.

His own anxieties self sabotaging his relationships with the only people- person he really cared about.

He swallowed thickly before replying, the feel of her delicate skin against his own dragging him back to surface from his suffocating fears. Ones he might have drowned in if not for her addictive salvation.

“Last time.” Was all he could say, jaw taught. “I almost lost you- the both of you.”

“Eri-“

“I am not my father. You…You are more than what your womb can give me- one was enough. More than enough. You are more precious to me than the heirs you may provide.”

“You…You do not want more children?”

She knew her husband was wary about the first, but had hoped he might have been convinced to have more. She was happy to compromise with his darkest fears and stop at two if it meant she could have at least one of each.

“My Love, I would have as many as you would be happy to give me, but…But it is dangerous. The Healers said-“

“Eris.” She was firm, pushing his hand further against her slightly raised stomach. “You have no reason to be afraid. You are High Lord- we have the best Healers at our disposal. After last time-“

She felt him still at the memory, a chilling sense of fear scattering its way down the bond.

“It was a miracle you both survived.” His voice was cold as she ran a hand through his choppy auburn locks, knowing that his reaction was not one of disappointment, but rather sheer unadulterated terror.

Worry for both his Mate and unborn child.

“Eri, we are both okay- we will be okay.”

And then he nodded.

A shaky breath with it, no less.

“Another, then?” Came a breathy half-laugh, his amber eyes glinting in the soft light of the room.

“Another,” she replied, eyes just as glassy, an incredulous smile on her face as he nuzzled his face against her womb, fresh tears of his own gathering against her gown.

If only the first time they had found out had been as simple.

-

“Must you leave me?” Eris drawled against the crown of your head, inhaling the scent as if it were his last drop of water in the vast, dry plains of Summer.

“It is all but only for a few hours you fiery baby,” you teased as he grinned against your silky hair, revelling in its softness against his cheek. “I would extend the invitation to you, though, I am certain you would not be interested in having tea with-“

“If by tea you mean talking about your sinful novels and eating pastries-“

“I’ll have you know we have distinguished talks-“

“About Sellyn Drake?”

“How do you know about Sellyn Drake?”

It was then he went quiet, which made you giggle, leaning into him for support as his hold on you tightened.

“Will you take the guards I have assigned to you? Perhaps too at least three of the hounds-“

“It is my birthplace Eris,” you wanted to roll your eyes at his overprotectiveness but knew it only came from love. “No guards. No hounds.”

It was then the eldest hound gave a high pitched whine, the very same one that had taken to curling up protectively over your stomach and defying Eris for the first time ever in her meticulously reared existence.

You were lucky he hadn’t caught on.

“How will I survive these awful meetings without knowing you’ll be right behind those doors to greet me once they have ceased?

Your smile became wicked.

“Perhaps I will have a greater surprise for you this evening-“

You barely finished your sentence before his hands had found themselves desperately grabbing at your rear, you smiled into his needy mouth as he pulled you into a tender kiss, laughing wildly as he squeezed the cheeks to slip his tongue right through your lips.

He would be in for a surprise alright.

-

You breathed in the air of Velaris with a melancholic peacefulness, whilst Autumn was your new home- the Court in which you presided over, nothing could ever beat the place in which you had grown.

Only two days prior, you had discovered you were pregnant- a miracle in itself. You knew of Eris’ remaining self doubts, ones that failed to be distinguished even after snuffing out Beron. How he had assured you that it wasn’t necessary to provide him heirs, that the risk of childbirth was not worth losing you.

You knew he was nothing like his father, and had often caught yourself daydreaming of what you could have- what your brother had.

It wasn’t until the Healers excitedly told you of your newfound condition that you thought it could ever be a reality.

You wanted to make it special. As special as Fae pregnancies were, and so you decided you would visit your long time favourite bakery and have them ice a celebration cake in such a way that would reveal the surprise.

One you hoped your husband would take well if not for his ridiculous overbearing attitude.

“Gods, you reek of Eris,” your cousin grimaced, nose scrunching as she pulled you into a hug. “No…Wait. What is that?” She pulled away perplexed, her pouty mouth falling open in disbelief as she suddenly recognised the sickly, sweet aroma- one also tinged with your husband’s delicate spice.

“Mor-“

“OH MY GOD! MOTHER’S TITS!” She squealed, loud enough for all of Prythian to hear. “You’re pregnant with that asshole’s child!”

You frowned.

“That asshole is still my Mate you know.”

“Cauldron boil you I suppose,” she retorted, a grin on her joyous face as you rolled your eyes with a half smile, knowing her jests were all in good humour- despite everything.

Despite the truth. Despite the truth and what you knew of Eris, the very truth your family now did too, there was still a long way to go for them to truly accept him.

“That is why I enlisted your help,” you continued, her arm now looped through yours. “I have been glamouring my scent so he wouldn’t find out until I had planned something special.”

“He has turned you soppy, Cousin,” she mocked as you giggled, knowing it was very much the other way around. “But who am I to say no to free pastries?”

After you and Mor had sufficiently stuffed yourself with cakes, you especially savouring the taste having suffered without it for far too long. It wasn’t that Autumn desserts were bad, you just missed the sweets of your childhood.

That and you were growing sick of spices and apple.

You had felt a pair of eyes trailing you but presumed it was due to the fact you were still Princess of the Night Court, your presence was greatly missed in those parts of Velaris you seldom frequented since being appointed High Lady Of Autumn.

After you thanked your favourite baker, receiving the delicate cake and had practically forced the money into her hands, making sure to visit again soon, it was almost time for you to leave the City of Starlight.

“Why can’t you stay for dinner?” Your cousin whined, still hanging off of your arm like she did when you both were teens. “I’m sure your husband can manage those few hours-“

“We will visit again when I reveal the news to everyone. I swear on the Mother Mor…You better keep it a secret- especially from Rhys!”

She raised her hands in mock surrender.

“Besides,” you continued, blissfully unaware of the presence gaining on you from behind the narrow alley. “Eris-“

It was Mor who screamed first.

You felt the dagger pierce your side, but the sharp pain in your stomach that followed was worse than whatever the assailant had set out to do. A dull ache that had stolen your voice away as you fell to the floor, helpless.

You felt yourself waning as Mor’s loud voice became faint, the last thing you saw were her shaking hands, covered in blood, as she removed the Autumn Court dagger from your marred flesh.

-

Eris jolted when the bond was flooded with pain, his hands scouring burn marks into his ornate chair at the head of the meeting he had been called to at the sudden intensity of it.

He hardly had time to react before the large oak doors swung open, revealing Lucien who, to anyone else, looked normal, but the most disheveled Eris had seen him in years.

The Advisors quickly bowed and deserted the room before Eris had the chance to send them away, Lucien’s shallow breaths enough to warn them of the severity of the situation their ears were not Privy to.

“Someone was sent to kill her,” was all the Emissary said. He knew Eris would understand and was never one for pleasantries. “Rhysand has her in the Town House-“

And that was all he needed to winnow straight to where his Mate was being held.

“Brother,” Lucien called out, only steps behind the High Lord, jogging to catch up to the man barrelling through the doors adorned with Night’s symbology. “Rhysand has her room guarded, I warn you-“

“She is my Mate,” he growled, animalistic. “I shall do as I please.”

“High Lord,” Rhysand greeted sarcastically as Eris stormed his way into view, heart beating so fast he was sure he might have a heart attack if he didn’t reach you in the next few seconds.

“Rhysand if you do not step your ridiculously shoed foot aside-“

“She is safe. Our Healers do not need another High Lord breathing down their necks-“

“Safe? Someone tried to kill her. I think you and I have very different definitions of ‘safe’, High Lord.” The title was spat with venom, not respect.

“It was an Autumn Court Soldier.” Rhysand’s tone was pointed, “if she hadn’t been with Morrigan, perhaps nobody would have found her in time.”

Eris’ face paled.

“Autumn?” His jaw became taught. “Where-“

“Azriel took him to the dungeons. I assured him to leave the bastard to you, that you would most certainly provide the deserved punishment.”

Eris couldn’t thank him.

The horrible lump in his throat stopping him.

The one that had never left since his cursed birth- the one that had remained even when you had entered his life, the one that only shrunk, but never ceased to exist.

You had been hurt because of him.

Targeted.

Almost killed because he had been unaware- unable to stop it.

He knew he didn’t deserve you, but this was enough proof for him to make that very lump increase tenfold. Increase to the point where he felt he was going to suffocate.

He was drowning. He was erratic and his salvation- his only respite, was laying unresponsive in next the room over.

Whenever he got like this, which was rare as of late, you were the one to soothe him.

Kiss away his fears- quash the traumas his father had so lovingly provided him.

He felt like he was going to die.

He wanted to.

A life without you in it was not worth living.

He felt a familiar claws scraping at his mental shields and could only blame his lack of response for their intrusion, sending his brother a sharp glare in return regardless.

“Get out of my head Rhysand!”

“Let him see her, Rhys,” came Feyre’s gentle voice as she emerged from the chamber in which you were being held, and Eris might have thanked her if not for the red tainting his vision. “You would act just the same if it were me.”

Rhysand looked torn for a moment- as if he had only just remembered his little sister, now his only sister, belonged to another male.

That someone else now held her heart.

“Try keeping your emotions in check High Lord,” came his suave voice, though Feyre knew he was masking his own fears. “Wouldn’t want to exasperate her further through your…Unfortunate bond, would we?”

And with that, the High Lord of Night made his exit.

A silent acceptance that Eris was the one now entrusted to look over you.

Feyre sent Eris an apologetic smile before catching up with her own Mate, lightly berating him before they could turn the corner.

He didn’t even bother to listen.

You were more important than any domestic material he could have on Rhysand to poke fun at him for later.

You were more important than anything.

He thought he had prepared himself for the worst, but he would never forget the way your face looked in that moment.

Pale.

Sickeningly pale.

Not the delicate, moonlit expanse he spent his nights caressing- worshipping, wondering how he got so lucky, but a pallid shade that almost brought him to his knees.

You were the only one who could ever bring him to.

He knew he had memorised the shade of your eyes- an ethereal violet, the only place he’d allow himself to get lost in, but was horrified as they remained shut.

Perhaps to never open again.

Because of him.

Or so he told himself.

He wished then he had spent every breath- every fleeting second of his centuries of living looking into those eyes if it meant never having to forget the way they looked.

The way you gazed upon him- with love.

Not with fear, disappointment nor disgust, but the way his mother did.

Even when you had wanted nothing to do with him, before you had accepted the bond and would refuse to meet his gaze, forced to trail behind your father and brother as a well-bred female should- or so was told.

Even when he knew he was the only one in love- would do anything for you regardless, he would rather go back to that moment, see those eyes narrowed at him in fury, than never see them again.

“The dagger was laced with Fae bane,” came the voice of Madja, he knew that because you had forced him to be attended to by her when he had suffered a particularly nasty thrashing at the hands of his father.

One you didn’t trust the Healers of his own court to remedy.

“By the Mother child, sit before you faint on me.” His face might have been have been paler than yours- blood colder and far more disheveled. “She is alive. After she wakes, Mother knows she will, I must warn you, she will still require an extensive recovery period- especially because of the baby.”

Especially because of the baby.

The baby.

The baby. The baby. The baby.

“T-The what?”

Madja breathed sharply through her nostrils.

“I see.” She sighed, adjusting the pillows beneath your limp neck. “I was under the impression you were aware. Do not fret, I have not informed anyone else-“

“She…She’s pregnant?”

It was then any semblance he was gripping onto fell through his hands like the tears threatened to from his piercing eyes.

His chest felt like it was on fire- consumed by the same flames that rested within him, his ribcage screaming out with each wavered breath as he used the wall for support.

He was having a panic attack.

He was having a panic attack and you were not there to save him.

“Leave,” he gritted out when he felt Madja inch towards him. “It will resolve itself in a minute- go.”

She was in no mood to argue with a High Lord- a temperamental one at that, and, deep down, trusted him enough to be left alone with you. He might’ve been the only one she would’ve taken that order from.

She knew that you loved him- that he loved you more. Perhaps even deeper than her own High Lord loved his own mate. She had practically raised you, it was not hard to tell. It was a palpable love.

A fiery, all consuming love.

When the woman had finally left, he let himself fall to your bedside, one hand clutching his chest, the other trembling and taking a firm hold of your much smaller, much softer one.

One that was ice cold.

He gasped through his tears, so foreign against his skin- his skin that had become so hot, his Magic uncontrollable, that they evaporated as soon as they fell upon his freckled cheeks.

The words came tumbling out before he could even rationalise- process what they meant. Apologising- for everything.

Apologising for being your Mate, for cursing you to be bound to such a fool as he, one that had broken his promise to protect you- to keep you safe.

He sobbed unabashedly- unashamedly into your hands, the frail digits slowly becoming warmed by his powers as he continued praying the hardest he’d ever prayed- the only time of three that he had ever put his wavering faith into the Mother, to keep you and his unborn child steady.

Steady and awake.

He wasn’t sure if Madja had been vague to comfort him or simply because she too was unaware when you would come to.

Or if you would ever.

He hadn’t even become a father and he had already failed his one duty.

If he felt worthless before, it was nothing to what he felt now- kneeling on the cold stone, his head against your womb with his fractured cries ricocheting off of the bloodied material.

He would burn it.

Buy you 1000 dresses to make up for the one he destroyed- never wanting to smell the scent of your blood, the one which made him gag and tears gather ever more strongly at the corner of his russet eyes.

He would burn it alongside the very man had done this to you.

Burn him slowly.

He would burn everything for you, the entirety of Prythian- himself to ensure your safety.

And now his child’s.

“E-Eri?”

And that’s when he really did properly cry.

You couldn’t understand what he was saying, his hoarse voice muffled by the fresh linen Madja had given you after attending to your wound.

Then you realised he wasn’t saying anything at all.

He was crying.

He was crying and trying to hide it.

“I-I’m sorry-“ your voice was weak, and it was your turn to cry. “I-I should’ve listened to you, I-I should never have come, I put our baby in danger-“

You spoke without thinking, but it was then you gasped.

Your baby.

“The baby is okay-“ Eris let out, his own voice breaking, finally lifting his head and allowing his watery gaze meeting your own as if saying it out loud finally made him accept it.

Realise what truly lay ahead.

“T-The baby- our baby,” he choked out, and you let him bring you into his arms, as you hiccuped against his shoulder as he held you. “My star, I can never apologise enough if I made you feel you couldn’t tell me-“

“No,” you sniffled, wincing as you shifted, “I-I came here to surprise you, I-I had someone bake a cake- I-“ you burst into tears again. “I-I didn’t mean for any of this to happen…I just wanted to make you happy!”

You were still thinking about him.

He was supposed to be the one comforting you and yet all you could do was apologise- apologise for wanting him to be happy.

“My Love, you make me happy. With every breath I take knowing you are my Mate fills me with more joy than anything tangible- anything else the Mother could ever gift me,” his words were sincere as he delicately held you, mindful of your wound. “There is nothing in all of Prythian that matters to me apart from you.”

He felt himself becoming tense as his fingers brushed against your cut- the one he refused to look at because it turned him feral.

“Are…Are you happy then?” Your voice was so small it almost broke him. The fact you even had to ask. “I know how you feel-“

“My Light, that news alone leaves me the happiest I have ever been,” he was struggling to maintain his composure with his Mate so weak- trembling in his strong arms. “A child is a blessing, one I am honoured you would ever give me…” His amber gaze became crescent shaped as he smiled, still in disbelief. “I love you. More than anything. More than I ever thought possible.”

You didn’t know why you were crying anymore.

The pain, the fear, the love you felt oozing from the bond or your husband’s words.

The confessions that spilled from him so readily- easily after years of coaxing him from his shell, that hard exterior even you had to work through.

“Our baby,” you echoed, the only words you could find as you revelled in your Mate’s tears.

A rare sight if any.

“Our baby,” he affirmed shakily, his free hand remaining protectively splayed on your flat stomach, swearing there and then he’d keep you safe- the both of you safe, no matter the cost.

The same cost that later that evening, when you had spent enough time wrapped up in Eris, Madja shooing him away exasperatedly, the man who had dared do this to you paid for.

The cost he paid for when Eris knew you were amply surrounded by people- family who loved you, people at your beck and call by your bedside, giving him enough time to deal with the very scum that had once been part of his- your Court.

The very cost that was hours of torture- brutal torture lovingly provided by the very blade that had harmed you- a hundred fold.

The man couldn’t even scream his last words, his tongue cut from his mouth as he was burned alive.

Eris, with a snarl on his powerful face at the memory of you so helpless.

And with the blood of his enemy covering his shaking hands, all he could think of was you.

You and his child.

[phoenixeclipse-lmkau]

Curious question here:

how would the warlords take it if alternatively, when reader first met them as cubs she was pregnant but even she didn't know that? Like how they would be before and after they developed feelings for her?

Or how would it be if after they get married and stuff when she gets sent back to her time line turns out she be pregnant with one of their child?

Ooh now this one is a fun one!

If she was pregnant beforehand, they would love the child immensely. While it wasn't theirs to begin with, they would have seen how much she loves it.

Though you better hope the father isn't in the picture because if he is... he might not be for much longer. Correction he would NOT be for much longer. The Monkey duo would go out of their way to make it look like an accident, but they will make sure that the father is dead. Of course, they'll be there to comfort you when the time comes.

And as this is a fictional world I believe there would be ways to pass on powers and such to others. They would give the child small bits of powers until they were able to use those powers well. So they would have a little mini Reader to care for as their own cub.

If the child is born before they start transferring power it would 100 percent chance the would be human. While if Reader was still pregnant when they began giving them power? There would be a chance for them to become a monkey demon/demoness. VERY SMALL CHANCE but a chance none the less.

Of course, they'll want to give the child a few siblings, too. Which means that the child would not at all have to fear for their life, they would have two warlords protecting them!

They want to take every chance to claim the child as theirs. Human or not, they are of your blood and are just so precious! So small and of adorable.

>>>

Now if Reader gets pregnant and goes home? Hehe I have quite a few ideas on how they would react to THAT!

First of all, the cub would probably absorb powers from both of them. Simply due to how strong their powers are, the cubs would be very strong. They would more than likely look much more like one of them than both of them, of course. She would love and support the cub with or without the help of her warlord husbands.

She would probably get sent back to the JTTW world before she has the child or children. But it would have been decades in the other world, while she would have only been gone a few months for her. Depending on when she returns definitely depends on how this is handled.

At the beginning of JTTW? She would probably ask Spirit for help (This is the only time she wouldn’t start the journey out with Tripitaka) Instead the pilgrims would probably find her while they’re traveling. They would meet her when the cubs are a few months or about a year old. Needless to say, Wukong and Macaque coo and love their cubs. (Setting aside their argument for a moment in their journey)

If it’s after JTTW and during the LMK part? Hehe~ Well that depends on which way I go with JTTW but~

If I go with the route of Mk being raised by the warlords (in which Mk was born from the stone egg and is technically Wukong's brother), then they would still love their cubs. It would make it easier for them to learn about Reader, and it would for sure make it far faster. Their curious nature would make sure of that.

In this route, Reader would have twins because I have the perfect cub ocs for this! Bao and Tao.

These two mischief causing twins are chaos incarnate (almost).

Both are born with six beautiful ears, Bao’s are shades of purple with the darkest shade on the top. While Tao has shades of red in his ears, with the darkest on the top.

Sun Bao is reckless and impulsive just like his dad. He likes to get into all kinds of trouble without much thought, he‘ll jump around and doesn’t know the definition of quiet. This boi is LOUD (Though not as loud as his younger sister is going to be), he will shout and yell all he wants without much thought until his brother pulls on his ear to shut him up. (Tao does this a LOT).

Even though Bao acts more like Wukong than Macaque he looks almost just like Macaque. He has pure white fur, a dark purple face mask and of course his six ears. The only thing he really inherited from Wukong other than his personality were his striking golden eyes, untainted from the Samaudi fire so they are pure gold.

Now Sun Tao on the other hand is the opposite of his brother. He is quiet, calm and likes to think things through before he causes havoc. He likes to plan how to play pranks on people and decide who based on the actions they make.

Tao has deep golden fur that covers his body, with the same dark red face mask as his dad and the six ears like Macaque. He also inherited his dad’s dark golden eyes, so some that don’t see his ears might actually mistake him for Wukong. (Which depending on his age, and if he’s known of WILL use this to his advantage… until Wukong hears and looks for the imposter)

I did use this post as an excuse to talk about my chaos twins didn’t I? Hehe~ Love these two. They are jokesters and love to see how many pranks they can play before someone finds them out. Which of course leads to their reveal.

Now when I say that they will make it easier for Wukong and Macaque to find Reader. This is for both if she is pregnant with them or if they are already born. While they have a hard time tracking Reader due to her being from another world… how can they not sense THEMSELVES!

Feeling the familiar magic makes it all the easier to track Reader down and capture her for themselves. The pure unbridled excitement and joy is exhilarating! They can’t wait for the little ones to come into the world. And if Reader thinks she can escape again? Well… she better think again.

Wukong and Macaque just better not do something stupid to get themselves trapped for whatever reason where they can’t get to Reader. But can SENSE their children. The devastation they would feel would be worse than under the mountain.

I hope you enjoyed the answer to this!! I have thought about this MANY times.

Comments, likes and reblogs are always wanted and appreciated! Thank you for all the love and the asks you send me!!