#i might consider a part 2...
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Eva(Billie Eilish) x fem!reader
Summary: Eva was your therapist. She was hypnotizing. You couldn't help but fall in love with her. Unfortunately, she moved away, but you ran into her a few years later
Warnings: Smut, fingering, kissing (nothing too serious)
Your best friend was an excessive party person. You though? Not so much. You disliked big crowds. And for the 100th time today, your best friend was practically begging for you to go to a bonfire party that a friend of a friend had supposedly invited her to.
"No. I told you, I don't wanna go." You sighed.
Having enough of her foolishness, you got up and started walking to your room.
"Wait! Eva will be there."
You immediately froze. Taken aback from the name that had come out of her mouth. "Eva? You mean the -" You were interrupted by your best friend as she spoke. Crossing her arms against her chest. "Yes, the same Eva you had a massive crush on years ago, but then she moved away and so on."
You brought your thumb to your mouth, chewing on your nail anxiously. Eva was your therapist almost 2 years ago from now. At the time, you were going through a lot with your family, the break up between you and your previous long-term girlfriend, and overall life was starting to get hard for you. So yeah, you really needed someone to help you get your shit together.
You couldn't help but feel compelled by her beauty. When she first told you her name, it was the only thing crowing your mind for days. Her eyes were so... hypnotic. And whenever she talked to you in that delicate tone of hers, you always felt so calm and secure in her presence.
"Right, so are you coming or not?" Your friend tilted her head, her hand on her hip as she waited for your response in anticipation. You didn't know why she wanted you to go so bad... she had many other cool friends she could go with.
"Fine... I'll think about it." You said, exhaling tiredly.
As you entered your room, shutting the door behind you; your heart started to race. Remembering every single moment you'd spent with Eva. The good memories, the bad ones. The intimate ones...
You felt a familiar heat flowing throughout your entire body, fanning yourself with your hand, trying to cool yourself off.
Every time you thought of Eva, this always seemed to occur. You couldn't resist her.
You closed your eyes. And as you did, you couldn't help but think of her even more. The way she touched you... the way she talked to you. You were so infatuated with it.
You slithered your hand near the edge of your pajama pants that coincidentally, Eva had bought for you.
Fiddling with your pants. You pulled them down just enough to carefully move your laced underwear to the side. You slid a single finger between your folds, a sharp exhale escaping your lips. And in that moment, she was all you could think about.
━─━────━─━──༺༻──━─━────━─━
"Take it slow, hun." She whispered in that same delicate tone that drove you crazy. You whimpered, curling your fingers upwards as your breath hitched. "Come on, I know you can do it." Eva rested on the sofa in front of you. watching you touch yourself. studying your every move. You were completely exposed for her. Legs open, your body leaned back against the headboard. You stopped. Needing a break since you started to feel tired.
But Eva wasn't too pleased with that. She walked up to the edge of the bed, sitting beside you as she grabbed your chin gently, forcing you to look at her. "Did i tell you to stop?" You shook your head, feeling the knot in your lower stomach build up.
"Then keep fucking yourself until I tell you to."
━─━────━─━──༺༻──━─━────━─━
That's all it took, a simple memory to make you come undone all over your fingers. You slid down against the wall, completely out of breath as you looked down at the mess beneath you. "Fuck..." You whispered and cussed under your breath, getting up to grab a towel from out of your dirty clothes to clean it all up. You were a mess... and it was all her fault.
Sadly enough, you agreed to go to the bonfire party with your best friend. You decided to wear jean shorts with little designs on the back pockets, a navy blue cami, a leather jacket, black boots you thrifted not too long ago and of course, your favorite gold jewelry.
You tried to look presentable, but at the same time, you didn't want to look like you tried too hard. You bit down on your bottom lip, feeling more and more nervous the closer you arrived to where the party was located. Just the thought of seeing her face again was making your heart race.
You sighed and reclined the seat, groaning as you covered your face with your hands. "Someone definitely isn't okay..." Your friend mumbled. But loud enough for you to hear it.
You uncovered your face and glared at her. Obviously, you weren't okay. "Let me guess. One word. Eva. I mean... you're being skittish, so it's kinda clear what's going on here."
You just rolled your eyes and looked out the windows. You were here. Your heart dropped as you pulled into the parking lot. No...this was a mistake.
Realization had hit you like a gun shot straight to the head. You were gonna see her again. Hear that voice again. No...no way. You couldn't do it. "Regretting it already? Too late. Get out the car and let's go." You groaned and opened the car door, getting out as you fiddled with your clothes.
It had been hours, and so far, no sign of Eva, but a shit ton of random people getting drunk and shouting directly in your ear. Your best friend had wondered off somewhere with some random guy and said they were going to go "talk real quick."
You sighed and started kicking the rocks beneath your feet. Why were you so disappointed...? It's not like you wanted to see her that bad anyways.
You pulled out your phone, attempting to call your best friend so you could leave. This whole thing was too overwhelming. She didn't answer. You groaned and rolled your eyes. What the hell was she doing? It's been an hour since she left you on your own.
You began walking and texting her repeatedly, hoping she'd answer. But not looking where you were going, you bumped into someone, dropping your phone and making them spill their drink all over them.
You gasped. "Oh my god...i- I'm so sorry. I wasn't watching where I was going and...this is my fault. I shouldn't have -" You heard them laugh, and you felt your heart drop. You knew that laugh.
You looked up and... Eva. "Hi." She said, a smirk slightly appearing on her face. You just stood there and stared at her. Jesus... she was still as captivating as ever.
"Uhm- hi..." You said. Your voice slightly shaky.
She just chuckled and looked at her ruined shirt. "Well, i probably should've brought an extra pair of clothes, huh?" You just nodded your head, too in shock from the fact that she was here... standing right in front of you. She raised an eyebrow, and she laughed again. You felt so embarrassed...
Eva was walking to her car, and there you were, trailing behind her awkwardly since she insisted on you going with her.
Apparently, Eva wanted to double-check to see if she had anything in her trunk since she had recently gone camping with a few friends. You fidgeted with your hands as she spoke to you about how she was doing, what she was doing, and why. You weren't really listening, to be honest. Too engrossed in her captivating presence.
She looked in her trunk. Unfortunately, she had nothing. "Dammit. I'll just have to make do with this, i guess." You felt even worse than you did before.
If you hadn't been distracted by your phone, you wouldn't have run into her, causing this entire situation. "You can borrow my jacket...?" You looked at her, making eye contact for a split second before looking away.
Whenever you made eye contact with her for too long, you always started to feel like you were under her control. You weren't complaining, but you didn't wanna feel that way anymore. Or so you thought.
She smirked, realizing you were avoiding eye contact. "Sure. Thanks, love." Your heart skipped a beat, and your breath hitched. "Mhm..." You began taking off your jacket, and she just stood there, watching your ever move, studying you like she always did.
You handed her the jacket, and she smiled. "Mind hiding me a little?" You nodded your head and turned around, standing behind her. You could hear the shuffle of her shirt as she lifted it above her head and off of her body. You wanted to look so bad... but you couldn't. You won't. Cursing under your breath, you sighed, trying to gather yourself.
Suddenly, you felt hands on your waist, and your eyes widened. "I missed you..." She whispered softly in your ear. Fuck.
Eva trailed her lips down to your neck, kissing gently as she pulled you closer, feeling her soft breast against your back. Double fuck. "Eva...i-" She hushed you and spun you around, meeting eye to eye. God. Her eyes...
You started to feel weak, your body betraying you as you gave into her touch. "Good girl."
She opened the door to the back of her car, pressing you down onto the seat. "Look at me, and don't look away." You nodded your head, too hypnotized in her gaze to form any words to respond.
She crawled into the back with you, lifting your legs up and throwing one over her shoulder. You heaved a sigh, feeling her knees press into your heated core. Your back arched. "Eva...hmm -" She cuffed your chin, tilting your head to the side and exposing more of your neck. Licking her lips, she made eye contact with you as she leaned in, licking a stripe up your smooth skin.
"How does it feel?" You inhaled sharply, feeling one of her hands snake down to cuff your already soaked pussy through your shorts. "Good... feels so good." You wrapped your arms around her neck whilst tangling your fingers in her soft, silky blonde strands.
"Yeah?" She sat up straight, caressing the inside of your thighs and biting down on her lip. "Tell me. Have you gone around fucking anyone since I've been gone?" You whined and nodded your head, guilt building up in your chest. "Yes..."
She chuckled sweetly and continued to soothingly caress your thigh. "It's okay. We both know they can't make you feel the way I do." You kept eye contact with her, just as she asked. You felt proud of yourself, hoping you'd be rewarded.
She snaked her hands to the hem of your jeans, unbuckling them sneakily. "Try not to be too loud, okay?" You nodded your head hurrily and lifted your hips, making it easier for her to slide your denim shorts off of your legs.
She looked down at your clothed cunt, licking her lips and admiring what she had missed for the longest.
Too impatient, she ripped your underwear off, throwing them somewhere in the car for you to search for later, but that wasn't important right now. "Look at you. You haven't changed at all. So whiny and hopeless for me."
Without warning, she slid two of her slim digits through your folds, earning a prolonged moan that escaped from your lips. This was what you needed. What you yearned for.
"... I missed you so much." You were so pathetic when it came to her. Only she knew this side of you, nobody else. "Mhm... is that so?"
She added another digit. Soon curling her fingers upwards, pressing into the knot that was ready to burst at any minute.
Your eyes lids fluttered, vision blurry. She kept a slow pace, purposely riling you up. Knowing you wanted more.
You moved your hips and pleaded for more. You need to get rid of all that pent-up frustration that only she could release.
"Eva...fuck- please..." And that's all it took. Before you knew it, she was three fingers deep, using her thumb to stimulate the sensitive bud between your folds.
You rolled your hips, legs quivering as she watched your eyes roll back. "That's it. Come for me." Instantly, your body reacted. Back arched, clawing onto her leather seats as you let out the sluttiest moans for the world to hear.
Eva removed her fingers from your seeping folds. Humming with satisfaction as she licked them clean. "Mm. You taste even better than what i remember."
She lowered her body. Cupping your chin as she hovered over your lips, feeling the warmth of your heavy breath before swallowing you whole. Making you taste your own arousal that was now mixed with her saliva.
She pulled away, a silver string connected from your lips as she smiled. So immersed in the moment, you locked eyes with each other. Feeling more connected than what words could ever explain. You never wanted to let her go.
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Notes: And finally... the long awaited Eva fic. I genuinely apologize for how long this took 😅 the previous one was sitting in my drafts, so I just started the whole thing over... but I hope you enjoy it!! 💞
#billie eilish#imagine#billie eilish fanfiction#fanfiction#fic#billie eilish fic#billie eilish imagine#billie eilish oneshot#billie eilish x fem!reader#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish smut#eva swarm smut#eva swarm#eva#swarm#eva smut#wlw smut#wlw#smut#billie eilish x y/n#billie eilish x you#eva x y/n#eva x you#eva x fem!reader#eva fanfiction#eva oneshot#eva imagine#oneshot#fanfic#i might consider a part 2...
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[ID in ALT] I've made posts before about Talia/Dick co-parenting Damian moments (will never happen but let me dream) and this came to me in a vision. Took me ages to finish for some reason 😭 and then even longer to post
#dc comics#dc#damian wayne#dick grayson#talia al ghul#batfamily#dc robin#nightwing#anyway. yes im a self-indulgent ''dick as damians secret third parent'' truther#like i DO think it's way more complex and nuanced than the schmoopy affectionate fan portrayal of it#they're brothers they're father and son they're partners they're the dynamic duo except only in past tense etc etc#but consider! I'm not immune to schmoopy affection in fanworks. it compells me despite itself#anyway it's technically not that crazy when it comes to dick and damian. they hug! often! at least they did#it's not as big a leap to these types of scenarios#also talia ''somewhat absent for complex reasons on both her and damians part but very loving and loved by her son'' al ghul#you will always be famous to me#son of the demon origin...bwahhh#anyway. someone made a comic kind of like this/like a post i made abt this topic#but way funnier bc dick and talia starting trying to beat each other up#so go look at that as well#anyway. it's been a somewhat difficult few weeks so I'm. desperately trying to take it easy#i got some reading with me (first vol of kevin smiths GA run that i found second hand and jaimes BB run vol 2!)#so we'll see how far i get through those. considering there's demons in my head telling me to re-read things (LET ME OUT!!!)#when i finish GA and BB i do plan on rereading robin 2021. as a treat to myself#it's a run I've really warmed up to as time went on#I'm keeping up w/ the current b&r run even though it is. admittedly very slow w/ some weird dialogue#i read it for the damian content more than anything. also nikas back so that's neat :]#idk I have a feeling that after absolute power shakes out we might get some more creative team switch ups#so if anyone at dc is interested in taking over the reigns on b&r...that could be very neat#mine
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ATEEZ(에이티즈) - 'Ice On My Teeth': Yunho
#ateez#yunho#consider this my 'help i've fallen and i can't get up' era#*wooyoung bungee jumping sound*#they let him show so much forehead now he has too much power oml#dark yunho era i live for#might be my favorite styling of him wow wow#no because why did he look like that for#jeong yunho#ice on my teeth#yunho gifs#kpop#에이티즈#ateez gifs#golden hour part 2#kq entertainment#atiny
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crazy how the sanshee plush is one of the few actual direct confirmations on what a non-act 2 Natsuki’s home life is like because of how cagey she is on literally everything. Like this isn’t anything surprising or something you wouldn’t be able to extrapolate from the games but unlike everything else we know about her the implications are right there on the tin.
They literally did the character bio trope where where all the likes are normal but the dislikes are about their very specific trauma it’s just so funny they did that on the plushie card
#the thing is the rest of the bios are mostly normal it’s just this one with the yellong part why did they do that#idk if I’m stupid or forgot the yelling thing being shown directly in a non-act 2 context but I at least appreciate the confirmation#since I might just be mixing up fanon and canon considering 90% of what we know with Natsuki’s whole deal is interpolated from small tidbits#but like trying to understand anything about non act 2 Natsuki’s background is so funny because she doesn’t like to talk about anything#so all we know about her home life is by comparing her to act 2 and the secret poem plus psychoanalysing her thoughts and actions#is like the secret poem says Monika definitely made her dad worse but the problem is we don’t know how much#anyways and for all we know her dad could range from somewhat average dad to should be put on a watch list#and sometimes there’s dialogue like the one in self love about Natsuki worrying about her friends retaliation#and it’s probably meant to act as a confirmation to whether there’s physical abuse considering how out of left field the question is#but like it could be interpreted either way so it’s basically just Schrödinger’s physical abuse for no reason#I’m not criticizing or anything I think the characters being able to hold secrets is cool and ambiguity is awesome#and the choice to keep the ambiguous is intentional since the characters only share what their comfortable with#but I just need to vent about that one line in self love ok#like idk if I’m just stupid but there’s multiple interpretations but it’s seemingly both a decomfirmation and confirmation#idk it’s weird but her dad yelling at her enough to make it one of her dislikes is at least something in terms of actual evidence#damn it I put a paragraph in the tags again I’m sorry gang I’m not moving it#ddlc#doki doki literature club#tempestmothtalk
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(SLIGHT SPOILERS FOR DRAGONS RISING PART 2 IN THE LAST TWO SENTENCES)
Damn. So you’re telling me BOTH of Wu’s ‘first’ students turned evil?
You’re telling me BOTH the Fsm’s ‘first’ students turned evil?
You’re telling me both of them had a ‘technical’ student (Nineko for the Fsm and Aspheera for Wu) and an ACTUAL first student (Garmadon and Morro)??
And now you’re telling me Lloyd already has a somewhat ‘evil’ or at the very least ‘morally grey’ student????
Man Lloyd is gonna go through it.
#dragons rising spoilers#ninjago#morro ninjago#morro wu#lego ninjago#if im being honest i dont know much about nineko#i do know she was taken in by the fsm#and was trained under him#but id consider it less of an official students thing and more of a ‘might as well teach her a few things’#lloyd ninjago#lego emo#lloyd garmadon#wu ninjago#ninjago sensei wu#garmadon#ninjago garmadon#nineko#ninjago nineko#ninjago fsm#first spinjitzu master#ninjago arin#dragons rising season 2 part 2#ninjago aspheera
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Neo Trai as BOSTON and Mond Tanutchai as BOEING ONLY FRIENDS (2023) | EP. 12
— requested by @odd-one-advocate ♡
#to my fellow boeingboston truther!! if i have to make 1/2 of the only 2/2 parts of a fandom i'm glad it's with you ♡♡♡#ofts boston#only friends boston#boeing kittipon#only friends boeing#only friends#only friends series#only friends the series#ofts#neo trai#mond tanutchai#only friends edit#thai bl#lana.gifs#onlyfriends.gifs#been working on this for 2 weeks straight but i've realized it's above my abilities to make these gifs look any better so i'm done#i've already outdone myself here anyways considering how dark and blue/green the original scenes were#no idea who could be interested in this content so i'm only tagging you bon – it might reach more bb enjoyers in case it fits your blog ♡#userbon
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When Inigo Montoya experiences immeasurable loss and mental anguish that propels him to a path of vengeance that he temporarily gets lost on, becoming a worse version of himself, a roving mercenary who even inadvertently ends up furthering the goals of his sworn enemy until he meets an opponent who makes him stop take stock and recognise how lost he has become and how he doesn't have to be in this alone, swiftly followed by him killing the target of his revenge and riding off into the sunset with his new friends everyone is lining up around the block to applaud,
However when the Dragon in Damsel follows the same story beats in a font just different enough to keep from getting sued...
#damsel 2024#the princess bride#damsel dragon#inigo montoya#inigo CHOSE with open eyes to work with Vizzini and was willingly going to kill westley because a job was a job without trickery#meanwhile the dragon was actively deceived into murdering young girls that had nothing to do with her vengeance crusade#in part because even in her darkest hours she was still more principled than those who had killed her daughters#and never once considered that they might find a way to weasel out of paying the cost#I couldn't not make the comparison when Robin Wright is also RIGHT THERE#this is mostly said in jest#but also I am right#damsel and TPB have very different tones and even when he is an antagonistic force inigo has two key benefits#1. we don't go in deep on how dark his past may or may not have been as a way to establish how big of threat he is#2. he has a human face to sympathise with#damsel dragon cannot receive the same graces or there wouldn't be much of a story
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Team Valiant girlies <3
@skylilac @callas-pancake-tree @arson-anarchy-death @neverseen-nevermore @steal-nightmares-leave-dreams @abubble125 @purplesoup-lad-le @gay-otlc @thefoxysnake @the-one-and-only-aroace @ravs6709 @theseasonismerrybutimnot @you-have-been-frizzled @kamikothe1and0lny @presidentroarie @cowboypossume @even-if-in-another-time @that-glasses-dog @katniss-elizabeth-chase @stop-stealing-tomatoes
#So#I also did try to draw the valiant boys but#For whatever reason#I just could not get them to look right#So thats a shame#I might consider making a part 2 of this with the non valiant girls#My goal was to finish this before christmas and I succeeded#So yay me !#Kotlc#Kotlc fanart#team valiant#Sophie foster#Biana vacker#Stina heks
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Guys, please, Tango doesn't consider himself a builder in the same way Michelangelo might not consider himself a painter* (see tags). You can accept you're very good at two things, and still consider yourself better at one over the other. It's not negative talk when he calls himself a redstone guy.
#tangotek#* Michelangelo was definitely good at painting but his preference was sculpture. Painting commissions were more frequent and profitable.#I don't know if this is the best example because it's difficult to parse exaggeration and fact#About historical figures in general especially artists and their personal feelings about their own art#and he definitely wouldn't have put a very strong divide between his skill sets because like.#You can see how much working and studying 3D space helped him create such life-like people in a 2D painting.#But I think Decked Out is a good example of harmony of skills too#The building part of game design and the coding part needed each other to create Decked Out 2#My point here is#That we can't ask Michaelangelo if he considers himself a sculptor or painter#Because he's dead and also may not have an actual answer himself#But we can ask Tango! And he says he's a redstoner not a builder. And that's ok :)#Dear God this entire set of tags sounds like pretentious rambling but I'm gonna post it anyway bc I hope people see past me comparing#a beloved Renaissance artist to a Block Game Guy#and take time to reflect on how an artist might interpret themselves vs how their audience sees them thru the lense of their work.
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I'm enabling you now go go go
UOU. SIGNAL UNDERSTOOD. Time for the big kenix and azrael rant under the cut!!!
So to start off, I'll briefly explain Azrael as a character since Kenix technically already had a brief character explanation
Azrael is also one of the "7 Deadly Sins" crew, just like Kenix, with his assigned sin being Envy.
For Azrael's case, Envy would be represented by his failures. Specifically failing his original protecting duties as a soldier in his past life, now envious of 'he' from his fantasies who has succeeded to protect others. The fact that he failed many times to live up to the version of him who has it all, driving him absolutely crazy. And as he does not have any idea how to deal with these feelings of anger and guilt, he only starts to blame everyone else around who had it better than him. Anyone who has managed to live up to their goals, being incredibly envious of them, to the point of purposefully ruining their lives. Ruining what they had so they could experience the same misery he felt this entire time, until it backfired and got him killed instead. (he is in misery but he doesn't want to be drowned in it alone, so he brings others down with him). He has failed himself by not meeting his own expectations, so the thought that there is a version of him out there that has succeeded to meet those same expectations and is now living better than before... makes him want to curse the entire world. Being extremely jealous of anyone who had the great success he wanted originally, now pouring out his misery as revenge on others, just to see them fall down the same way his entire world shattered in his eyes. The same misery now being turned into the poison inside his body, using it as a weapon against his enemy in the Afterlife. Now living as a cursed being that is forever bound to this insufferable nature, he tries to keep mostly to himself after becoming the 4th in line to join the sins crew. No roaming around the land with no end in sight, no contact, no relationships — only him and himself.
That is until Kenix himself has taken interest in Azrael. The interest was ever so the same as it was for the previous members of the crew. Attempting to get on semi-friendly terms with the others that are now just as miserable as him deep inside, since aggravating them would nothing good to both parties and he is aware of how fucked everything is for all of them combined, having the "false" feeling of empathy for them. But Azrael intrigued him the most because of how much he felt that their anguish was similar in a way. Both of their worlds were shattered and took it out on others because they didn't know how to deal with their problems in a healthy way, Azrael's case just got more extreme than Kenix's, who has only took it out on his surronding enviroment, which was very limited ever since he was young (and additionally taking it out on some of the Original timeline crew members/"The Warriors" after he was in the Afterlife). It was then when the suppressed desperation to feel something resurfaced. The wish to know what a connection between people is, the wish to have even someone by his side that would accept him as the awful person he is now. That desperation slipping through the the cracks of his facade of carelessness for others, having no feelings of remorse for his actions — he knows he can't go on for long without any sort of human interaction, that would only drive him more insane and worsen his state which would lead to his end sooner than expected. Not only is it because he knows that there is a higher risk chance if he will forever cut off everyone from his life, it is own wish to have someone finally accept him that has been born from the years of loneliness and isolation. He wants to, he 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘰 find some sort of companion for his own sake, something he never thought could happen because he truly believed that he would be better off without anyone. He doesn't think that he could ever become better, but the thought that someone, whose just as awful as he is, would accept him as this very same awful being, made him feel something that he has never experienced (Is it hope?? Is it the desperation for affection?? Not even Kenix knows that)
And that's when Azrael comes in. Nothing about Azrael said that the interest was mutual, but Kenix didn't stop attempting to engage in a first conversation with him. Azrael, due to his nature and the decision to distance himself from others, didn't feel like it. In fact, he also felt like Kenix shouldn't be trusted so there was this constant need to be cautious around him. Something about that attitude, that smile, the manner of speaking Kenix has,,, threw him off a few times to be honest. But when Azrael tried to confront Kenix head on about why the one kept trying to get closer to him, Kenix would only make up a shallow lie that Azrael's gradient hair looked interesting. He could 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 ever admit out loud that he desperately longed for someone who understood him, admitting to that would be a sign of showing weakness — and that is prohibited when Kenix's first desire was about being powerful and seem powerful. Additionally, it is not like he would ever take "my carefully built facade is slowly breaking day by day and my true feelings and desperate wishes for human companionship and physical affection have been shown to someone that I thought would finally be the one to help me get through this agony" well. he would probably spiral and worsen everything about his mental state and sanity even more and that means that he would meet his demise sooner. which is unwanted as he still wants to have a chance at life — not the best one, but a life at the very least.
It is where their relationships starts to build off from that point. Azrael slowly starts to show more trust towards Kenix and that made Kenix have this sense of hope, the hope that Azrael will become the one person Kenix wished to have by his side until the end of time. Kenix undeniably always has been fascinated by Azrael and with each interaction, the fascination for him grew only bigger. From Azrael acting annoyed at Kenix for being too bothersome to sincerely enjoying each other's company. Starting all those nice conversations between them about anything they share as interests until Azrael one day decided to hold Kenix's hand without realizing it himself. He pretty much realized it only by seeing Kenix's puzzled face. That is when he found out that Kenix has... almost no concept of what physical affection is shown through. No grasp on the idea of what hand holding is, or no idea about any other displays of affection. Finding out about just how isolated Kenix was that he has no idea about how it feels to be hugged or hug someone else was just shocking to him. Which made him start being curious about what various displays of affection Kenix has no idea about. and is it not surprising that he doesn't know about most of it. this man's past is probably the definition of loneliness and he never knew what it was like to be loved or show love to others so pretty obvious that this stuff will puzzle him as it is just this new thing for him even if he wished for it for a long time.
Azrael just holding his hand actually made Kenix crave that feeling more (because of incredibly touch starved this man is). It is "I never knew of this sensation but please stay with me like this for just a few more minutes I'll provide us with all the time in the world to allow us to just stay closer together for a longer while" kind of craving (at this point he is not able to hide just how badly he needed someone next to him at all times)
Now Azrael is just showing this guy with some serious unaddressed issues™ what it is like to be loved and Kenix tries to show love back with what is left of his heart. Usually successful but sometimes it is just gifting something made out of someone else. it is not fun to hear the screaming of thousands because you wear this ring he gifted you. They have still committed atrocities but now they are able to accidentally "fix" each other without realizing it
#kenix has so many issues that he hides behind a facade it is unreal#he wouldn't even know how to tell if he has romantic feelings for anyone he has never experienced any of this and is therefore#clueless. at least he got someone to help him now#i'd explain more about them but that is too much blocks of text in one post hopefully i can do a part 2 to this someday#anyways. please consider them i hold them very dear to my heart for over a year now#kenix MIGHT be experiencing something more than just fascination for azrael. just a thought though#kenix's heart doesn't have much capacity for love but he can do his best if he tries#his ability to love has been destroyed ever since childhood afterall. it will take a while to restore it back#azrael is patient enough to let kenix get more comfortable about sharing his past with him#yomo ocs?!#yomoart
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potential sonic 3 spoilers incoming if anyone cares. anyway . apparently there was an official survey about the knuckles show/scu in general and one of the questions was about what name you would use for an eggman/shadow/gerald teamup. which is a weirdly specific question. and also one of the name options was team dark …….. ?? even though rouge isnt mentioned in the question and theres no sign of her being in the next movie in general ? i was willing to accept amy being introduced a little after knuckles and tails but between there still being no sign of her being in the next movie and now this if they actually have gerald time travel or something and have him be the third member of the dark story trio instead of rouge then i will be fully convinced that theyre going out of their way to exclude as many already existing girl characters as possible. like i get cgi is expensive which could be part of the reason rouge might not have made the cut. but damn . assuming this is real anyway it could just be another fake leak but idk
#im not saying the writers hate all the girl characters (iirc they have said they like amy and rouge and shown interest in adding them)#and i also dont think the movies have to be complete copies of the games in terms of stories and characters#but some of the decisions being made here are so weird and kinda show a lack of care for those characters ..#its especially odd that iirc theyve said that part of what influences the choices on what characters to use is popularity/recognizability#both to fans of the games as well as more casual viewers#yet they might be rewriting a major part of the story just to include gerald over rouge?#and they wanted a character who was a ghost echidna that guided the living characters and they picked pachacamac#instead of tikal who both already fits that description And is more popular?#okay well i doubt casual viewers would know who tikal is but they dont know who pachacamac is either#and its also an objective fact that tikal is more popular among fans . Man .#also theres the thing of knuckles being given a connection to iblis when thats already elise (and blaze)'s thing#to be fair knuckles is way more popular and recognizable than elise. and i really doubt sonic 06 would get adapted#but still#maria IS confirmed to be in the next movie though#but idk if i would consider that to be a win for girl sonic characters#considering shes the only one known to be in it AND she dies#sonic movie spoilers#sonic movie 3 spoilers#i guess idk#also again considering the whole cgi thing i would have been willing to accept no rouge even if its disappointing#but to have gerald of all characters replace her is just so. what .... cant you just use agent stone or a new character or something#i dont hate gerald its just the idea of bringing him back to life instead of including rouge is weird .#anyway . we also dont have full context so maybe its nt as bad as it sounds. or maybe theyre hiding rouge and amy from us . IDKK#but also every new info about this movie we get has me like that one picture of a guy holding a cigarette and looking reallytired#and i hate feeling this way when i was so excited about the first 2 when they came out#sad ! well theres other sonic media
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oh man no wonder i'm missing my little guys recently. we haven't seen kaeya in almost a year
#personal stuff#delete later#a month from now marks one year since his hangout....#head in hands.... kaeya come back i miss you#yes i Know he has a hangout i can replay at any time that also has his brother in it. not the same#diluc showed up back in march with his normalguysona and kaeya sent a letter but it's just not the same...#i miss the ragbros insanity that 2.8 and 3.1 inflicted upon me. i miss bouncing off the walls thinking about them and their new lore#can they come back and do something that makes me relive that sometime soon. please. for me#not sure who's going to be in the summer event this year. probably not going to be either of them but can it be Someone i care abt#for the most part they have been? like 1.6 was THE found family slash siblings vacation#2.8 was my girlie fischl and also hidden strife#then 3.8 was kaeya and klee and collei and kokomi#come on let's keep up this energy. this will be THE mondstadt update TRUST#like come onn venti and lisa both told us to come back to mondstadt before setting off for somewhere new......#like at this point i have very little hope for mondstadt character story quest 2. i used to hope for it w every update but now it's like#who fucking knows. we'll wait until snezhnaya i guess. that's when venti and diluc will probably be relevant again#jean miiight get a second one after natlan depending on what happens to varka's expedition? since her mom is there i think#manifesting a second razor quest then too. we know what the rifthounds are now + varka coming back would be a good setup#and klee might get one whenever we meet alice. i have my thoughts but idk when Exactly that'll be#but lisa's thing probably won't be relevant for a while either considering its connection to the abyss order#and kaeya and albedo... yeah.#but like. i'd love to see amber go to liyue and find her grandpa or something :(#and like. fuck it i would love to see a second xiangling quest too.
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Same venue. Same-ish crowd. Opposing seasons. Contrasting vibes.
#me#sometimes you have a few beers and yr feeling yrself. sometimes you feel too much like yourself and consider leaving early#for all the talk of yearning and intricate rituals let me tell you. a drunk girl sidled in right in front of me and the sense of rage i-#her and esp the guys she was with got kinda rowdy in the pit later on shoving each other also into the crowd whom did NOT want part of that#its a lot of people in a small room and at this point i was already further back and against a wall let me tell you#i think if someone had touched me i might have snapped fr#still had an ok time though once i got over feeling super embarrassed about my self and dared looking other people in the eye lol ah#one thing i do like abt the culture is the genderneutrality of it all... the most long and luscious locks in the room belong to some guy#and i can show up in sport bra and oversized shirt no typa bag no makeup wearin black laceup boots that could be m or f#my gender is uh. dont worry abt it lets just turn off the lights and vibe#got talking w someone tho who said she recognised me frm a diff event & i didnt much like that idea.. im not in the mood to be Perceived at#the venue IS p cool tho... like oo at a forgotten space on the other side of the tracks. by the water. by the skate park. yea#edit HOW could i forget. the rowdiest of drunk guys got either shamed into stepping out or str8 removed fr a lil while im not sure lol#and another guy wantedto crowdsurf but only 2 of his friends came to the stage to get him so he just kinda. crawled on top of them#and they awkwardly took a few steps carrying him round the vacated front. none of the crowd wanted shit to do w them lmao
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Hmm i May be fucked. Working on the practice problems for Thursday's exam (fucking group theory) is Not going well. And that's WITH wikipedia and my notes to help me. Which i won't have on the exam. The morning of the day after tomorrow. Also i need to use some of my time to pack to go home for break (my ride is picking me up directly from my exam to leave. The 9:30am-11am exam. That i am absolutely SCREWED on.)
#rambles#like i love math and if i had a full semester or two dedicated to group theory such that it could go slowly i might love it. HOWEVER.#there's just A Lot and i didn't absorb Any of it. so many moving parts and things to consider and definitions to memorize. so yay.#doesn't help that the problems aren't using additive/multiplicative notation consistently or clearly.#“f(2)=2” cool so using that to find f(1). f(1)=1 because f(2*1)=2=(2*1) so f(1)=1 WRONG f(1)=4. what
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i can't believe it only took me until now to make it so that miriam, as sweet and lovely and cheery as she is, harbors a deep-seated hatred for people and herself. we love the contrast
#when the cookie crumbles#yes i know i make a lot of girlies who are always about 2 steps away from killing everyone in their vicinity and then themselves but#consider: it's awesome and i love doing it#this is Also part of how she starts bonding with ced bc try as they might people won't give them the time of day#and always view their shortcomings as their most prominent feature instead of their hard work and successes#so you know.#smth smth there is something wrong with you that is also wrong with me#and recognition of the self thru the other#[farquaad vc] and so on and so forth#miriam tag
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watched inside out 2.
what ive learned thus far is im actually being controlled a whole lot by my personified anxiety head creature because im so often lost in potential scenarios its actually quite detrimental to my existence actually
#miesozernacma#inside out#inside out 2#inside out anxiety#like i dont feel im that anxious of a person#but the focus on future scenarios is. its real#like currently im lost in thought about a friendship at school#theres a girl i talk to and stick with (as well as a few others) that i dont really wanna be friends with anymore#because shes not a good fit for me personality wise methinks. a year of verification is good enough for me#and the simple (“simple”) task is to just go up to her and be like#“hey so ive noticed you have a few traits and behaviours that i dont really vibe with so we should part ways. ur cool just not for me”#in like the most plain words possible. fast and to the point#but my kneejerk reaction is to think how she might react#or what the other friend might do after that#and another friend#and if shell consider me her enemy or something (lol?)#and its pretty annoying because ultimately#i know what i want.#and in this case it's to separate from a girl i dont fw no more#rly brave and cool of you to ask to hang out but#im about to be cool and brave and tell you how i *really* feel. yknow.
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